The Bossticks - How To Use Tapping To Change Your Thoughts, Conquer Problems, & Change Your Life Ft. Gala Darling

Episode Date: July 4, 2022

#475: On today's episode we are joined by Gala Darling. Gala is the self proclaimed tapping queen , best selling author, and creator. Gala joins the show to discuss how we can utilize the power of tapping to potentially change your thoughts, conquer our problems, and change our lives. To try a free tapping click here: bit.ly/galaconfidential  To connect with Lauryn Evarts click HERE To connect with Michael Bosstick click HERE Read More on The Skinny Confidential HERE For Detailed Show Notes visit TSCPODCAST.COM To Call the Him & Her Hotline call: 1-833-SKINNYS (754-6697) Check Out Lauryn's NEW BOOK, Get The Fuck Out Of The Sun HERE This episode is brought to you by The Skinny Confidential  The Hot Mess Ice Roller is here to help you contour, tighten, and de-puff your facial skin and It's paired alongside the Ice Queen Facial Oil which is packed with anti-oxidants that penetrates quickly to help hydrate, firm, and reduce the appearance of fine lines and wrinkles, leaving skin soft and supple. To check them out visit www.shopskinnyconfidential.com now.  Produced by Dear Media 

The following podcast is a dear media production. Before we jump into this episode, I have a groundbreaking offer for you guys, and it is a good one. It has 40% off this product that I'm obsessed with. If you guys have been following along for a while, you know that I have completely kicked alcohol this year, just completely stopped consuming it. And listen, at some point I may go back, but for now, I'm just not consuming it. And I'm going to be honest, it was difficult in the beginning, but now I don't even think about it. And one of the reasons I don't even think about it is if I ever feel the it or if I'm ever out publicly or socially, and I want to be honest. partake and get a euphoric feeling. Instead of alcohol, I take this euphoric

kava drink called Feel Free by Botanic Tonics. We've talked about it on this show. We had the founder, J.W. Ross, on the show. It's an incredible drink. It's just this one little tonic. It's got kava. It's got kratom. So you do have to be a little bit careful. Make sure you're not consuming it all the time. And I take it instead of alcohol. I use it, you know, going out socially, then have a little bit of water with it. And honestly, it's been a game changer because I've been able to completely kick alcohol out of my life, still kind of get that social euphoric feeling and in a much healthier way. So like I said, to try it out, we have a 40% discount code for you. All you have to do is go to Botanic Tonics. That's B-O-T-A-N-I-C-Tonics.com and use

code Skinny40. And if you've already used that code because it's a one-time code, we have a special offer just for podcast listeners. If you use code Skinny 240, you can do it again to try it again. I suggest doing the subscription to get the biggest discount, but it's up to you. So check it out. That's Botanictonics.com and either code Skinny 40 or Skinny 240 for 40% off your entire order. It's a great offer. Enjoy. She's a lifestyle blogger extraordinaire. Fantastic. And he's a serial entrepreneur. A very smart cookie. And now Lauren Everts and Michael Bostic are bringing you along for the ride. Get ready for some major realness. Welcome to the skinny confidential, him and her. My experience is that when

we want to change something, we often try to change it at the results end of it, right? And Like, I don't feel fit, so I'm going to eat really healthy. And it lasts for like three days. And the reason for that is that we don't have the beliefs in place to create long-lasting change. So if we started our beliefs, then we have different thoughts and different actions and different results. But we start with results and it never works.

Hello, happy 4th of July. Welcome back to the skinny confidential him and her podcast. So today, we have Gala Darling on the podcast. This episode, we talk about all the things. We even teach Michael a tapping therapy. I'm tapping. I've been tapping through everything. I tap through labor.

I've been tapping through the holidays. I've been tapping through this maternity leave. I'm just tapping away. Did you tap through your parents visiting us? I tapped through my parents visiting. I tap through your parents visiting. I was tapping the shit out of myself. You guys are going to learn all about tapping from the queen of tapping.

She's a spiritual pop star as seen in Vogue, Forbes, and Oprah. and she's also a bestselling author. She has amazing energy and just background on her. I actually started following her 13 years ago when I launched the Skinny Confidential, which is so crazy. She was living in New York City and I loved her blog. It was all pink. It still is pink. And I was super attracted to her as a person. She has the best energy. I think you're going to love this episode. Also be sure you pick up a copy of her book, Radical Self-Love. She is just a total boss entrepreneur. And I think you're going to be obsessed with this technique of tapping. She did it on me on the podcast.

I was feeling really overwhelmed and so pregnant and just full of heartburn. And I actually didn't get heartburn the night that she did tapping on me. So definitely listen on to hear more. Gala darling, author, tapping and manifestation queen. Welcome to the show. She's going to give you some high vibes, you guys. This is the skinny confidential, him and her. Do you know, I told you in the bathroom that I have followed you for 13 years on social media?

I had no idea about that. And I'm extremely flatted because I think your shit just pops. It's insanely good. Well, you like pink. She's wearing, she has pink nails, pink dress, pink hair. Yeah. Pink lipstick. Pink shoes. I love it. I think when I first started following you, you also loved pink too, if I remember correctly. Yeah, when I started my blog, I had pink hair. Yeah. When I started following you, you had been a blogger since 2006, and I believe you were in New York City living with a guy and blogging about it. Yeah, that sounds right. I can't remember the guy's name, but I remember your name. There's been a few of them.

Perfect. How have you evolved starting at the beginning of your journey in 2006 to now? Oh, so many ways. I think that, I mean, I started my blog in Australia. and moved to New York City with two suitcases after doing it for like a year and a half and really wanted to create this magical life for myself. And I, when I, just before I started my blog, all I really wanted to do was like be creative and happy. And those felt like very big dreams because at the time I was not creative and I was

not happy. Or at least I wasn't expressing my creativity. Why weren't you creative and why weren't you happy? I was really struggling with depression and an eating disorder when I lived in New Zealand. It really plagued me and I think the thing that's so insidious about depression or an eating disorder is that your mind tells you that this is who you are, this is who you're going to be forever, and if you're happy or you're healed, you won't create good art anyway. So you have to stay in that miserable place to be an artist. So you were addicted to suffering.

I was totally addicted to suffering. It was my identity. And I believed that I wouldn't be able to make anything interesting or good or I wouldn't be interesting if I wasn't miserable, which is hilarious because miserable people are the worst to be around. But my mind told me that I had to be miserable to create art. How did your eating disorder start? Were you young?

Were you older? How did it manifest? I was like 18 years old. So when I was 13, I started suffering from depression and I started self-harming. And I did that for about five years and then stopped self-harming and was like, oh, cool, I'm cured, but I switched it to an eating disorder. I would love for you to speak on that a little bit before we get into your evolution because I think a lot of people transfer addictions. For instance, like, I know someone that, you know, was a horrible alcoholic and now he's gambling. It's a similar, like, kind of outlet, but it's different.

You're just switching your coping mechanism, but you're still trying to mask the same pain, shame, trauma. sadness, whatever. So we have to be really careful about, like, what am I using to cope? And we all have things that we use to cope. Like, I love to online shop. It's my vice for sure. But we have to really notice, like, is me doing this actually getting me the life that I want? And if I keep making this choice, am I going to receive the life I want? We have to be really mindful about that, you know? Do you remember a moment in time when there was like a catalyst event that triggered some of these behaviors? Not really. I think, you know, my household was really chaotic and I sort of learned the lesson that it wasn't okay for me to

express my emotions. And when you repress how you're feeling all the time, it just kind of goes underground and comes out as, you know, depression or sadness. And I think in a lot of family systems, there is an emotion that's not allowed to be expressed. And for me and my family, that emotion was anger. It wasn't allowed to express that. And when that goes underground, it usually becomes sadness. When you switch from self-harm to your eating disorder, I mean, how bad did it get, did you have to be hospitalized? Is it something that you were able to talk with a therapist and, like, move on from? Are you still struggling with it? How does it work? I would say I was pretty bad. I felt extremely miserable. I remember looking in a mirror and crying because I was so ashamed

of how I looked. I didn't want to leave the house. Like, it was really fucking bad. And I remember seeing a therapist about it, and they were like, oh, we can put you on lithium. And I was like, well, what are the side effects? They were like, well, weight gain. And I was like, well, I'm definitely not fucking taking that. So thanks. And the only thing that really shifted things for me was I had a boyfriend who loved me a lot and didn't want to see me suffering and my suffering was hurtful for him too. And he said, I need you to do something about this because I can't stay with you if you're going to be like this. Like, this is not working. And he had discovered this thing called tapping on like archaic YouTube and was like, give this a try.

And so that's how I got introduced to that healing technique and how I really changed my life. It was basically from my boyfriend nagging me to do it or feeling like, I value him more than I value myself. So I'm going to do what he wants me to do. And it ended up really helping me. You knew about tapping that long ago. Yeah, I've been tapping for 16 years. Wow. Wow.

I know. Oh, he found it randomly on YouTube. He was, I would call him like a self-development junkie who was really into it. And he just was always trying new things. Looking back on everything you've been through with your eating disorder, you think that tapping was like your main tool. Would you like to hear the story of this? Okay.

This is the platform. And you're wearing the color. And wearing the color. Okay. He was like, I really want you to try this tapping thing. And tapping is basically acupuncture without needles. So you're pressing on meridian points while you talk to yourself. It looks ridiculous.

Seems stupid. And I was very cynical and very goth at the time. And I really didn't believe it would work. So I thought you can apparently use this on anything, right? It was developed for veterans with PTSD. And I was like, okay. I'm going to try using this on my asthma symptoms because I would need to use my inhaler every morning when I walked up the hill in the cold weather to catch a bus to work. I learned how to do it off this

video. It's really easy. It took me like five minutes to learn it. I did a session that was maybe 10 or 15 minutes long and the next morning I didn't have to use my inhaler. And I had had asthma since I was 10 years old. I used my inhaler every day, multiple times a day. And I thought, if I can literally change my body function from this technique, what else am I telling myself or what else do I believe about myself that doesn't have to be true? And what can I change? And the answer is you can change pretty much everything. And so that's what I've been doing. I've been using tapping to change old habits, old beliefs, and step into a new life for myself. And the way that I healed my eating disorder was I took a dose of MDMA.

I went into my bathroom. I took all my clothes off. I stared myself in the mirror. I tapped for like 45 minutes. And I was healed. The next day I was like, yes, make me some breakfast. Let's go.

No problem. Okay. First of all, if someone has asthma, can you describe and do it in front of me? What tapping that you were doing when you helped with your asthma? So basically what you do with tapping is you talk about how the issue feels in your body.

So does it make you feel like how does it make you feel physically? Does it make you feel constricted? Does it make you feel like you can't breathe? Whatever it is. You want to be really specific. And you also want to talk about how it makes you feel emotionally. So do you feel shame? Do you feel weakness?

Do you feel embarrassed? Like what are the emotions? And the magic phrase in tapping is even though I have this issue, whatever that issue is, I deeply and completely love and accept and forgive myself. And what are you tapping for asthma while you're saying this? I was tapping on the fact that I felt like my lungs didn't work very well and I was weak and I wasn't strong. And I was frustrated by the fact that I had to use my inhaler all the time. And I really, I remember when I had asthma, I felt like a prisoner of that.

Like I always had to have an inhaler with me. And I always thought, like, if I have to run somewhere, I'm in trouble because I can't run somewhere without having to use this. So you told yourself a narrative of I can't run somewhere. If I run somewhere, I'm in trouble. But I guess when I say where, I mean where on your body and what finger? Like, what are you tapping? Show us. Okay.

So the first point is the side of the hand here. So you tap here just like with your dominant hand. When you're tapping there, you're talking about what the issue is. So you're kind of tuning into the problem and getting specific. And then when you do an actual round of tapping, you tap the top of the head, the start of the eyebrow, temples under the eye, under the nose, under the mouth, collar bones, under your arm. where your bra strap would come around and your two wrists together. And do you have to do it alone or could like Michael do it to me and I do it to him? He could totally do it to you.

And actually a really beautiful way to use tapping. Something I did with that first boyfriend who introduced me to it is you can sit facing each other and you can tap on the points on each other and say what you appreciate about them. It's so beautiful. Do different, so all the points you referenced, there's significance I imagine to each of the points. Yeah. And how do you figure that out? So they all have different significance. Maybe a stupid question, but no, no, no, not at all.

They all have different significance, but the significance of them doesn't really matter as long as you do them in order. So some of the tempo matter at all, or is it just like? No, the tempo doesn't really matter. Some of the points are for feeling clarity and some of the points are for feeling a sense of calm. So they're all different. But when you use them in sequence, you're really able to raise your energy and then be in like a state of calm. Okay. And then for the skeptics out there and people that are just learning about this, say you have a physical

ailment. Like there's something, you know, an illness, something physical. What do you do in those situations? Because it sounds like, and tell me if I'm wrong here, a lot of this is clearing mental blocks or clearing things that you've told yourself. Yeah. Well, the way that tapping works is essentially when you're doing the tapping, you're bypassing your conscious mind. You're going into your subconscious, which is where you can rewire your brain and you can create these new neural pathways and these new beliefs. And my experience is that when we want to change something, we often try to change it at the results end of it, right? Like, I don't feel fit, so I'm going to eat really healthy.

And it lasts for like three days. And the reason for that is that we don't have the beliefs in place to create long-lasting change. So if we started our beliefs, then we have different thoughts and different actions and different results. But we start with results, and it never works. So when you're looking at something like this. It's like doing a juice cleanse when you've just completely eaten like shit and put yourself into an alcohol stupor for 80s. months, right? Exactly, exactly. But, you know, we want to change things, but we're not thinking about what our beliefs are that are underpinning it that are holding us back. So say you want to be really

fit and healthy, but your whole family is unfit, they're unwell, they're in and out of hospital. You have stories that that's how you are, that that's how it's always going to be, that that's all you've seen. And you also might have stories that if I change this about myself, my family might feel like bad about themselves. They might disown me. They may shame me or embarrass me. They might exclude me. And those reasons really stop us from making significant change because we're like, well, I want to be healthy, but I really want my family to love me. So if those are my choices, I'm going to pick my family. Now a word from our sponsor, Better Help. I am maybe a little extra sensitive to this right now because I am currently in postpartum, just had a baby. And I

I noticed that I am getting a little bit of baby blues. And I could see how something like this could spiral if you don't take care of it. How I fight baby blues or burnout or just feeling like low is I get outside. I walk. I get in the sun. I take my supplements. And I also think it's really important to have a sounding board and someone to talk to. So enter BetterHelp.

BetterHelp is an online therapy that wants to remind you to prioritize yourself. When you talk through something, you can figure out what's causing you. the stress. I think having an online platform where they really zone in on lack of motivation, irritability, fatigue, and burnout is so incredible. This is seriously so innovative and it's seamless and you can do it from home, which is amazing. So BetterHelp is a customized online therapy that offers video, phone, and even live chat sessions with your therapist. So you don't have to see anyone on camera if you don't want to. I like this feature because I know a lot of people would prefer to just talk on the phone. You should also know it's much more afforded.

than in-person therapy and you can be matched with your therapist in under 48 hours. So if you're feeling blue or you're feeling depressed or overwhelmed, this is definitely a platform that you should check out or recommend this to a friend who's feeling that. Of course, we have a discount for you. All skinny confidential, him and her listeners, get 10% off your first month at betterhelp.com slash skinny. That's betterhelp, help.com slash skinny. I know that this works because of three reasons.

This is my reasoning. The first thing is, is that my sister has done it for her post-traumatic stress. And she said it's the only therapy that she's done a lot of therapy that's worked. The tapping.

She says she is able to clear space and she just raves about it. The other reason is I was at my acupuncturist yesterday who does Chinese medicine and she was telling me that I needed to do tapping for heartburn. So that's interesting how this is colliding. But the third reason is,

because I have done what you're saying about the belief systems, this pregnancy, and I didn't do them the first. And this pregnancy, the weight gain that I've experienced is exponentially different. It's wild. And I think that it does have to do a lot with weightlifting, but I also think it has to do with the belief system that I've told myself during meditation. Right. What's your new belief now that is different than what it was last time? My new belief now is I tell myself, I do Louise Hay a lot. I love Louise Hay so much. I want to get into like, because there's similarities. Joe Dispenza and Louise Hay, I've kind of like melded together.

And instead of telling myself, my first pregnancy, I was like, I'm so fat. I'm gaining weight. What am I going to do? This is so, like, I just told myself all this negative stuff. And in this pregnancy, it's completely opposite. I've told myself, I'm fit. I'm capable. When I get done with this, I'm going to.

get my body back. And this people can be like, this is superficial, but your body's your vessel. I want to be as fit and I want to be the best version of myself. And that's just how I want to be. You do you. That's for me. I want to feel my best. But it's worked so differently in this pregnancy.

So my question is, is this something that you can also do in meditation or do you have to do the tapping with it? You have to do the tapping with it. There's something about the physical movement and stimulation of those points that changes things. And because it's still kind of a new technique, there's not a ton of research on it. There's a woman called Dr. Peter Stapleton, who's like a tapping nerd, and she knows a lot about it. But they've measured, like, how the act of it lowers your cortisol and things like that. So it's really incredible. But I love that you mentioned Louise Hay. She's like

my hero. And my book was published by Hayhouse, which was like the ultimate moment for me. That blew my mind. I love her so much. And I love her so much. And I love that. listen to her all the time. And the thing that she always reminds me, and I feel like we know it, but we forget it, is that criticizing yourself does not work. It never works. You have to love yourself. And when you love yourself, you make different choices and improvement just happens. Miracles just happen. And that is so, like, isn't that so liberating to know you don't have to punish yourself into being who you want to be? You can just love yourself and you'll blossom and bloom and become that person. It sounds almost stupid and cliche to say love yourself, but I sent one of my guys.

friends, Louise Hay meditation. And he did it. And one of the things she says is that you have to look in the mirror and say, I love you. He couldn't do it. Yeah. He couldn't do it. And it's so wild, he can do it now. He's, he like has gone on this ayahuasca journey and like done a lot of self-reflection and meditation. And he can do it now. But he said he couldn't do it for like months. I think other people can feel the energy when you don't love yourself. Totally. It comes across. It's like, you know, you could be the most beautiful, well-dressed woman in a room. But if you're standing in the corner and you're tugging at your dress and you don't really want to be there, you're not going to have that magnetic energy that people are drawn to.

And people are really drawn to you when you behave like you're there for a reason. I think that that conversation is a conversation that should be had on this podcast, too. Like, people can feel when you are insecure. People can feel when you're feeling desperate. As humans, like, we don't even know that we can sub-executive. consciously feel it. How do you stay confident? I mean, I just ran into you in the bathroom. You're confident. Your posture's beautiful. What are some tools that you use besides tapping to feel like that? Besides tapping, honestly, tapping's like my biggest thing. Someone said to me the day,

what's your meditation practice? I don't have a meditation practice. I don't really enjoy that. And to me, tapping is even more powerful because I'm choosing to reprogram a new belief. I prefer that much more than just emptying my mind. Like, I can empty my mind while I browse, revolve, or you know what I mean? Or take a walk. So tell us exactly how you use it. Is it in your morning routine, your nighttime routine, both? Is it two minutes?

Is it 20 minutes? What do you do? Okay, great question. So when I started with tapping, I also started my blog around the same time. And if anyone listening as an entrepreneur, you know this. It is the biggest spiritual test ever to start a business because all of your self-worth and your doubt comes up. And so when I started my blog, I would write down every limiting belief I had every day that came up, which was like, no one cares about this. No one's going to pay me to do this. I'm never

going to make a living. Blah, blah, blah. Who am I to say all of this, et cetera? And it would tap those things out every single day. It would tap like five times a day. So what does that look like to tap it out? Like you write it down and then how do you tap it out? You write it down and then you go sit in a quiet spot and you just start working through how you're feeling. And tapping is almost like PIP talking yourself out loud while you tap these points. And I think people feel like it has to be really complicated, but it really doesn't. All you do is talk about how it feels, like you get real about how you're feeling. And then you talk about the fact that you forgive yourself anyway, you accept yourself even though you're having this problem, which a lot of us don't do. And then you just talk about

how you want to feel. You're just programming yourself. It's really easy. Can you give us a little bit of the history of tapping? Like you spoke about veterans. Can you tell us, a little bit about where this came from, how it started, like the history. There was a couple of doctor, scientist people who were doing experiments with kind of like neurolinguistic programming and acupuncture and positive psychology. And then those two doctors, a guy called Gary Craig, took what they were doing and kind of put it together to make it tapping. And it's been through lots of iterations. It used to be way more complicated. There was some sequence where you hum, happy birthday and tap between all your fingers and

stuff. Because it's still new, it's really evolving all the time. And like a lot of people will tap with just one hand, but I use two because I feel like it balances the left and right side of your brain, your masculine, feminine energy, and I feel like it's way more powerful and effective. That's like briefly the science, but Gary Craig was using it for veterans with PTSD, and he's got a website that you can look at. It's called emofree.com. There's tons of data and studies and papers on it if you really want to nerd out. There's heaps of data about it. tell Michael some transformations that you've seen. Oh, yes.

Okay. Michael is unfamiliar. I told you before we got on air with this whole tapping. So I want to give it. No, but it makes more sense as you're explaining it. Basically, it's changing a lot of the hardwired beliefs systems that you have in your system from early age or whatever.

Yeah. And your beliefs dictate everything that you do. If you think you're a loser, you're not going to start of business. Think and grow rich. Exactly. Like, even we all have these friends that are the biggest,

like hyperchondriacs, right? And I, at least in my life, my friends that are the biggest hyperconduers tend to be the ones that feel like they're always the sickest or have the most ailments. And I look at these guys and I'm like, this belief system that you have is maybe manifesting itself in all of these illnesses because I run around being the most irresponsible. I mean, people got so mad at us for so long. I mean, whatever. I'm always feeling fine because I don't go through life thinking like I'm going to get sick here or someone's going to get me a germ there. All my friends that do that, they're always sick. Yeah. It's just like if you think that people are terrible and you can trust them and they're all assholes? Who do you meet all day?

Sure. Assholes. Terrible asshole people. It's like confirmation bias. Absolutely. Absolutely. And you get what you're noticing. You know, your reticular activating system is designed to notice what you put attention on. So like if, for example, the number 333 is important to you, your brain registers that and you'll see it everywhere and you feel like it's signs from the universe. Your brain has just been programmed to look at it. So what are some before and afters that you've seen like some radical transformations? Okay, so on the subject of asthma, because I think this physical stuff can be really fascinating. I did a session over the phone with a woman in Germany who also had asthma.

And she just didn't want to struggle with it anymore. So we did a session on the phone. We're on the phone for about an hour. We probably tapped for maybe 35 minutes. She messaged me on Instagram about three months ago, and she was like, just wanted to let you know, I'm running marathons. I really appreciate what you did for me. Like, that's wild.

After one session, or did she continue to do it after? one session. You're going to tap me for heartburn. I'm going to tap you for hotburn. Okay. How long do you have to tap, though? This is where I'm confused. Yeah.

If you are using it throughout the day, does it have to be a certain amount of time? No, I mean, if you're tapping on, like, you have some daddy issues, you may want to go 20 minutes. But if you're just tapping on, like, I have heartburn or I'm nauseous, maybe it's five minutes. Wow. You just do it until you feel a shift. And then you're like, cool, now I can live my life. That's what I really like about this. You don't have to spend all day doing it.

You don't have to hire a therapist. You don't have it, need any equipment. You just use your hands. Do you honestly think it's like what Michael says. It just unblocks the pathways in your brain to create clarity for you to move on? Yeah. Well, I was having this conversation in the bit, you know, and I think you can maybe apply this in other areas.

I'll apply it to a business. Like, I think a lot of things in business are very simple. Mm-hmm. But people complicate them. I'll give you an example. If you are running a business and you need funding, that's how simple it is. you need funding. So the solution is like, go get funding, right? But people say, like, well, that's so hard. Of course, there's nuances in the way you pitch and all that. But what people do is

they create all these other struggles and problems about why they can't or where they won't or how they're not set up. And that makes the, that makes the potential of getting funding almost impossible. Same thing. Like, we had an issue in this business a little while back way to let some people go. And it's like, the solution is like, let them go. And the team was talking about all these different scenarios about why you couldn't or why we had to wait or this or that. And I was like, these are simple things, but we create these blocks in our head. I think you can apply that to a million things in life, right? Like, I can't like, I cut alcohol.

So how did you cut alcohol? I said, I cut alcohol. Yeah, you just decide that you're not going to drink it anymore. Exactly. Easy. I know there's people that suffer with addiction and all these things, but I think it was as simple as me just making a decision that at this stage in life, I'm not drinking alcohol anymore.

And then I cut it. And so I can get on board with a lot of this because I think like you said, it's a shift. It's like, it's you make a decision. It's usually a simple decision, but we've overcomplicated the reason we can't make it. Yeah, totally. Like you decide I'm not going to date boys who don't have a bid frame anymore. Just make the decision.

You're done. It's easy. Your bed is on the floor. I am not dating you. Right. Yeah. And also, Michael, when you took me to your fraternity house with your disgusting bed with condoms everywhere, I wasn't going to date you at that point either.

At least I was being responsible. Oh, yeah. Oh, okay. But that is so true. You can just wake up and decide. Totally. I believe that as well. Yeah.

And the thing that that stops us from sticking to that decision is we don't have adequate self-love, self-confidence to stick to it. Because you meet a guy whose mattress is on the floor and you think, well, I might not meet anyone else because I'm not that great. So maybe I got to date them. I love this because it goes into the narratives that we tell ourselves. And I think that what I've realized, too, when you're able to be introspective and get quiet, that's when you really have a lot of, like, you can really grow. I was talking to Michael about this the other day with with quarantine and COVID. I've noticed out of this come two things. People were sort of forced to be introspective, right? We were forced in our house to be quiet, to have thinking time, to have time to do things.

And I noticed that people either went two ways. People either loved the introspection and now they're craving more and saying no to events or they didn't like it and they can't. I can't wait to get outside themselves. Yeah. Which is interesting. Have you noticed with quarantine that people have been tapping more, manifesting more? Have you noticed it be less? I mean, 2020 was one of the biggest years in my business because all the things that people used to do to distract themselves.

I'm going to date a million people. I'm going to go to the bar. I'm going to go shopping. I'm going to go overseas. We couldn't do. And we were stuck in our house with our thoughts. And we realized, like, what I'm doing is not working for me. Like, I need to do something else.

So, yeah, completely. And that self-awareness is really, really important. And I also think that being around people who tell you the truth is really important. Not people that gassed you up needlessly. Not people that kiss your ass, but people who will be like, actually, you kind of suck at that. How do you find people that tell you the truth? If someone's out there and they feel like they only have yes men around them. I would say maybe look at your own behavior.

Do you tell people the truth? Right. Do you tell yourself the truth? Because you attract what you're like. Talk about that. Well, it's hard to be a straight shooter, but people respect you more and you respect yourself if you are rather than just saying yes to everything. I'm on the plane here. I was listening to Boundary Boss by Terry Cole. Have you heard that book? Uh-uh. She used to be my therapist in New York City.

She's incredible. And this book is, you know, she says it's about boundaries, but really it's about being codependent and a people pleaser. And so many of us have those tendencies in our lives where were like, I had a falling out with my friend, but I don't really want to tell her what she did. So maybe I just won't reply to her text messages. And it's like, well, actually, you're not going to resolve it that way. And you'll feel better about yourself, even if you have to have a difficult situation, like, conversation. If you tell her what's really going on. You are the king of boundary boss.

Well. Michael is pretty good at it. My boyfriend's a killer attitude. It's like, it's a selfish thing, though. see if this is radical honesty it is and I love that like just be self-aware and tell us the truth it's a selfish thing in the sense that I don't want to carry baggage and I don't want to go through life with people not knowing exactly where I stand for I have to remember all the lies right it's exhausting yeah and if a behavior or circumstance or situation is not working I'd rather just

tell you why so that that's not me just kind of playing along I think the same thing can be applied in business like you can tell people straight up like hey really love the effort, but this doesn't work, right? I tell my team all the time, like, I don't care if you're working hard. I care that we're getting results, right? Like, there's people outside that work way harder than us doing way harder jobs. They don't get the results, right? So it's not to say that I don't appreciate the effort, but I am going to give the feedback to say, hey, there's a, I think, a better way to do this, right? Yeah. Okay. So as you know, we had the founder of Just Thrive Health, Tina, on our podcast a while back with a microbiologist, and they broke down all the

benefits of probiotics. I know a lot of you are taking just Thrive Health probiotics like me. I took it through my whole pregnancy. I'm taking it now in postpartum. Probiotic, we all know, is so important to the gut. I even sprinkle some in Zaza smoothie. But they have launched a new product, and they came on the podcast and discussed it. You have to go back and listen to this episode if you haven't.

It's called Just Calm. So this is a new stress and mood support for. formula from Just Thrive. So it's the producers of your favorite probiotic. You guys all love Just Thrive. I get all the messages about it. And now they have a new supplement. And they basically go through why Just Calm is such an important supplement in the episode

they were just on. It's a psychobiotic strain. So if you're unfamiliar, psychobiotics are a new class of products that utilize beneficial bacteria to support your best mood and emotional health. Very important right now in postpartum for me to be. really supporting my mood so I don't kill Michael. This also helps drive mental clarity, focus, and alertness. I like to take this with my probiotic. It comes in very similar packaging. And I think the two work together. Just Thrive probiotic paired with JustCom is a dynamic duo for your

guts, your immune system, and your mood support. And of course, we have a code for you. You get 15% off both Just Thrive Probiotic and Just Calm. If you want to stock their site, you can also get 15% off all their products, but these are the two that I would go for. That's just thrivehealth.com. Use code skinny at checkout. Just thrive health.com use code skinny. Are you good at that? I think I'm good at boundaries. What do you think? I would say good. Lauren sometimes has, I'm going to out you here. You can out me. Go for it. What if you're not out of me on this podcast? Here's an example. If somebody's feeling bad about themselves and there's a reason, let's use an example, like maybe they're not where they want to be in their business and Lauren's having a success in an area of her business. What Lauren will sometimes do to try

to match that person to make them feel better is kind of try to dumb down or play down some of the good things that are happening in her life. But what it does is it only shines a brighter light on the insecurity that that other person has because they know that Lauren's doing well in a certain area and they know they're not. My approach is more like, hey, like, super grateful for the space I'm in right now and here's what I would change to help you get there. Or if you don't want to my advice, I'll stay out of it. But I don't try to match someone's energy to make them feel better if that's not actually what's going on in my life. Does that make sense? Totally. I think it's a very like, it's a, it's a, it's a kind empathetic thing to do, I think. Yes, but I think the end result is not,

it's not the outcome she's hoping for because I actually think it makes the person end up feeling worse than they felt before. Well, there's a couple of things. I think, you know, if you, if someone's in the mud, it doesn't help them for you to get in the mud too. Like, you have to stay on the bank and throw them a rope, right? But that's not even it. I'm saying it's not even getting in the mud with him. It's pretending I'm in the mud when I'm not. Like just putting it here and being like, yeah. Yeah, I get it. I understand. And it's like, no, not really. But like, let me help. My whole thing is like, let me help lift you out of that and see like where you're limiting belief starts so that I can like maybe help you get to a better space.

Yeah. But to try to pretend that I empathize because I'm in that circumstance. It's just I won't play that game because it's not true. I don't know what to do about it. If you have any tips. I mean, it's maybe like actually kind of like a feminine trait too. I think it can be. And I think we're sort of taught that we need to like coddle everyone's feelings and make sure no one's jealous of us. And if they're jealous of us and they might be backstabbing in drama, whereas men will just hit you. It's a different thing, right? I'm also like I want to point out that there's times when I'm feeling low or not in the right space. And what I don't want, like I want people to come into my life at that moment, people that are not that are in a better place and say like, hey, let me show you or a better way to do this.

It would be tough for me to seek out someone I would consider a mentor or something and then have them to like, oh yeah, I get it. I'm there too. It's like, no, you're not, dude. You're not. I like to make people feel good. Yeah. So my, not bad. Feel good. Like, I like to uplift people. I don't ever want to be someone and we all know an Eeyore like that makes people feel like shit. I always want people to feel good. And not in a fake way. I genuinely want them to feel good. So my intention is right, but I get like, I get what he's saying that sometimes I just need to acknowledge that everyone's in different chapters. Yeah. Something that I look. from Abraham Hicks, I don't know if you listen to Abraham Hicks, is that we often say your

husband comes home and he's in a bad mood and you feel like in order to make him feel better, you need to feel bad with him. But learning to stay within my own energetic lane and not be swayed by how other people are feeling is very powerful. Because I can't feel bad enough to make you feel better. That's exactly. Yes, she said it way more eloquently than I said. Or it's like the situation where you know you're like a 13 year old kid and you're depressed so you put on the most depressing music you can find. Because you want to waller. Yeah. Maybe that's not the best solution. Like for it. It makes you feel better for a moment because it's like somebody's relating to where you are in that moment. But it doesn't help you get out of it. Yeah. My girlfriend called this like emotional matching. Have you heard of this? No, but I totally understand what that means. Where her husband comes home and he's in a really bad mood and he gets mad if she doesn't get mad too. And so they had to go to therapy and have this conversation where she was, was like, I can't meet you where you are. It's exactly what you just said. I have to stay in my energetic lean. And if you're having a bad day, that doesn't mean you need to drag me down with you. Right. And I'm not responsible for making you feel bitter. That is your job. And sometimes we think

that if we do that, we're being callous and we're not being kind or empathetic, but it doesn't work. Like, it doesn't work. That's where I get in trouble. I think that I try to make people, if a friend calls me and she's having a bad day. I'll try to make her feel better and I get in trouble. But don't you think that's like kind of... It's okay to make her feel better, but I think there's a lot of power in you shining. Like, say someone, like the example, someone's having trouble in their business and you did this great launch, you can influence much more by talking about what went well for you and not pretending it wasn't as successful as it was. And you can say, well, I hired this person who did amazing and I learned this thing that really helped, you know? Because when we do that, people feel,

feel like it's possible for them too. That's a really good advice. I just, I did this. There's a TikTok that came out and there was a question of me basically saying, playing devil's advocate on the show. And I was basically saying, do you think it's our responsibility to have to like basically coddle the feelings of others to make, to make them feel good about anything they say, we say here to.

And like there was push back on both sides. But I do, I stand by the belief that I think you create weaker generations and weaker people by constantly coddling and not saying, and not pointing out like, hey, like, life's tough, it's not fair, there's no such thing is fair. You've got to build a mental armor, you've got to build a mental toughness. Generations before us had it much worse, whether you believe that or not, it's true, it's a fact.

And I think that we're getting to a place where people think empathy is constantly worrying about upsetting, offending, making someone sad. I don't think that's empathy. I think you're actually harming people further. I think true empathy is lifting people

up and making them stronger. I think empathy is really just asking questions and not assuming that you know how they feel. And if someone's mother passes, not assuming that you know how that feels, because you don't know what their dynamic was. They might actually be thrilled at their mother's no longer here, you know. So I think empathy is really just asking questions and listening and then saying, how can I support you? I love these tips. I'm taking them. Let's talk about self-love. You wrote a whole book about it. I got tattooed on my arm. You got radical self-love. Yeah. What we, in the beginning, talked about your evolution

and we didn't get to where you are now. How has that journey of self-love transpired for you personally? Oh, my God. I mean, when you were saying, can I give examples of transformation to Michael earlier? One of the best examples of transformation is if you look at the most popular video on my YouTube channel, it's from 14 years ago.

It's my first video of me explaining tapping. I am 23 years old. I have purple hair. I have zero confidence. I am so shy. And like that, transformation is unbelievable even for me to look at. I feel like I'm looking at my child. It's such a huge transformation. And I think a lot of that just comes from kind of like you're saying,

like building that thicker skin and doing hard things. It's the only way that you transform. And you need that grit in order for something to shift. There's no transformation or uplevel or blossoming if there's no resistance and no grit. Like you have to have that. And it's been everything from me moving to New York City with two suitcases. What was the circumstances behind that, by the way? Me moving to New York. I had a boyfriend in Australia and I was like, I'm done. And I just always wanted to be in New York, so I moved. But I'm like a girl from New Zealand. I had never been in a city like that before. It was terrifying. A huge change. Huge change. But I just, I really wanted to make it work. And I was like, I am not going to be a homeless and I am B, not going to go home and live with my

parents in New Zealand. So I'm going to figure this out. And I think, you know, everything from doing that to starting my business and, you know, teaching people tapping and then being willing to put myself out there and talk about this thing that is genuinely so weird looking. And I felt like I had a lot of resistance of talking around about tapping because I couldn't, I didn't think it was cool. And I was like, well, I don't want to talk about something that I think is kind of embarrassing. And I was like, okay, then my job is to make this cool. How do I make it cool? And just taking on those challenges is how you transform and blossom and bloom. So go back to New York City, because that's when I started following you. You're in New York City. Tell us from New York City to now. New York City to now.

I lived in a bedroom, like a one bedroom, a studio in the West Village where the toilet was in the hallway. It was $2,500 a month. It was a five-floor walk-up, brutal. That is brutal. I lived there. I got married. I decided the marriage wasn't working. I got divorced. And when I got divorced, I decided that it was up to me to define what that meant from me. And I'd seen a lot of women who were like, oh, I'm divorced and they had this shame and sadness around it. And I was like, no, like, this can be whatever you want it to be. This can be a rebirth.

I got divorced. I got my book published. I got a boob job. I went to Morocco for a month. I was like, yes, like, let me do what I really want to fucking do. That's how I'm getting divorced. I'm pinning that to my Pinterest board. When I get divorced, I'm getting a new boob job.

I'm going to Morocco. I'm going to pop my fucking puss. Like, watch out. Listen, all power to you. Totally. So, yeah, I lived in New York City for 10 years, and New York City is a tough place. It is so hard on your nervous system. Like, I loved it, and I loved to walk around in the evening, and there was so much energy

and excitement, but I got to a certain level where I was like, I'm working so hard. I have no quality of life. I have a fire escape if I want to go outside, like, awful. So I moved to Los Angeles in 2018, lived there for two years, and then COVID happened. I moved to Orange County and I was like, okay, bye, which I love. So how has your blogging career changed? Well, when I started in 2006, the way that you made money on a blog was through blog advertising. So like American Apparel would pay me $3,000 a month for a banner ad. I remember that. That's vintage. Back in the day. And then in 2008, the economy crashed and people

weren't buying blog advertising anymore. And I was like, holy shit, I have to pay this rent in New York City. I don't know how I'm going to do this. And I have this friend called Mike Dooley. who writes notes from the universe. He's super cool. And I called him and I was like, how do I make money off this audience that I have? I have no idea how to do it. And he said, well, I walk around my house with a dictaphone and I talk into it and I like sell the CDs of that to my audience. And I thought, that's a cool idea, but I'm not confident enough with my speaking to do that yet. So what I decided to do was write a book and release it as a serial. So this is the fourth draft of that book that I wrote

starting in 2008, 2009. So you kept updating the draft? So, no, I would write one chapter a month and send it out to my audience who had paid for it. So they would get like the PDF and an audio chapter of it. And that was how I started building my business and I made like $100,000 over that first book. And I was like, okay, there's totally space for

if people like what I'm making, I can say, hey, if you give me money, I'll give you more of this. And I was really hesitant to do that in the beginning. I thought people were going to say I was a sellout and they weren't going to be into it, but they loved it. Sometimes you got to go to the gym. And then from the gym, you got to go to an appointment.

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So each month you sent them a chapter. Yeah. And then built a book yourself. Yeah. I think that's so genius because people, when they're writing a book, I notice, will look from A to Z. And what I always tell everyone, and I'm not an expert, but the way I wrote my book is, like, you have to just look at one chapter at a time. Yeah. And not be overwhelmed by the whole thing at once.

And I think the same goes for starting a podcast or a business. Yeah. No, I mean, there's something that you touched on that I just reminded and I've talked about it through the years, but I read this article a while back, probably around that same time, maybe a little later. It's called a thousand true fans. It's at this point. It's a great article, yeah. And I think so many young entrepreneurs, especially if you're creating digital content should read that. Basically, the premise is you get a thousand true fans, sell a hundred dollar product, just a hundred thousand dollar business. It's not as unattainable as people think when you think, okay, I just need a thousand people to care about something I'm saying or doing. Yeah, it's really not that hard. And the thing that's cool about my book that way. You know, they basically were my proofreaders and my editors, you know, they'd come back and say, like, I love this chapter or this was not great or whatever. And then when it was finished, I polished it up and I took it to an agent and we went to a bunch of publishing houses. And I remember sitting at a table with a random house and they were like, we don't get it. Like, I don't get what this book is about. And it was really shocking to me because to me,

the idea that you should love yourself is so obvious. And it deflated me for a couple of months. like, I'm going to publish this myself. Like, I believe in this message and I'm willing to back myself and make this book. So I hired a graphic designer. We took photos. I uploaded it to like the Amazon storefront or whatever it is. It was like an instant bestseller on Amazon. And then Hayhouse was like, hey, can we publish your book? So I really sold this book like three times. By the way, anyone that says they don't get it, you're on to something. Totally agree. I love when people say they don't get it. Yeah, you're ahead. It's literally an orgasm to me. When someone, especially when it's like an old guy and like his like, what's the pencil holder in the pocket pencil? People aren't

carrying those things anymore. Some people, yeah, the pocket protector and he's like, I don't get it. And I'm like, great. Who the fuck are you talking to? Don Draper. If you got it, then it wouldn't be an avant-garde nuance idea. Completely. By, I'm glad you don't get it. Yeah. And I think there's so much power in backing your own idea. And when you have something that is ahead of the curve, you actually may need to develop that yourself for people to really understand it. You know who you remind me of, and I'm sure you know her, the Champagne Diet. Oh, you know what's so weird is we've never met in person, but we lived like blocks from each other in New York City. Yeah, she took everything into her own hands. I think she has like 10 books now.

She has so many books. I don't even know what to do with them. Like, it's unbelievable. Well, I don't want to like fuck up either of your guys' deals here because I know you both published books. But like if there is an industry that needs to be turned on its head and reimagined its publishing. Oh, a million percent. And, you know, publishes, they have no idea what they're doing with marketing. It's, it's really just the glory of saying like, Random House, publish my book. You'll make more money on Amazon. So publishing. Maybe we'll do that over here at your media. Yeah. Dot, dot, dot, dot. I told you that for a long time, though. Don't steal that idea and say it was yours. I told you that you need a publishing division. We have all the channels. I'm saying it here first. I told you that

you need a publishing division. I need the credit. Because the big thing is what do they do. They just basically get it placed in bookstores in Amazon? I'll be publishing. And they organized for you to be on like too shitty podcast for promo. It's a job. So if you had a hundred great ones, maybe do publishing. I'm going on a tangent here. Yeah, maybe I'll do that.

It's wild. There is a money to be made in publishing and it needs to be disrupted. It does. It's time. It's such a dinosaur industry. I totally agree. LB publishing sounds so cute. We can get a neon sign made all coordinated. Paige, if you're listening, let's get on

As long as it's a neon sign, I'm on board with any business idea. Yeah, 100%. What can our audience do to attract and manifest besides tapping? What are some little things that you can tell them to do in the morning or at night? So I have a practice called the magical morning practice that I love. So we all wake up in the morning and look at our phone. I think I feel like you're good at not doing that, actually. Don't do it.

You're so good at not doing that. I never look at my phone. I'm writing this down. Oh, you're writing it down. I'm going to send it over here. Okay, okay. Okay, so the magical morning practice, you're going to grab your phone anyway. So you grab your phone and instead of looking at Instagram, you open the voice memo app and you make a

recording for yourself for that day. And your recording is in three parts. You're going to talk about what you're grateful for, like genuinely grateful for maybe like two minutes tops. Then you're going to talk about your desire for the day, but you're going to say it in the past tense like it's already happened. So you're going to say, I had such a great day. I woke up, I had this beautiful breakfast.

I went and did this podcast and I killed it. I went home to my man. We had great sex and then I fell asleep and I placed an order and bought some clothes or whatever. And you say it as if it's already happened because when you do that, your subconscious doesn't know the difference between something that's now or present or past. So you're planting the seed that those things are going to happen. You're literally setting yourself up for that. And then you talk about your future desire. So my future desire is my books in New York Times bestseller and I'm so proud of it and I bought this beautiful house and an infinity pool and I go out there and I walk to the beach every morning and that's my life and I love it. And then you finish

recording. So with that, you can either keep it for yourself and just use it to like set the energetic tone and subconscious tone of your day or if you're feeling brave, you can send it to a friend who listens to it and sends you one back. I'll listen to yours every single morning. I expect this tomorrow morning. No looking at your phone. I want a voice note. And I want to be involved in the gratefuls that you say. Obviously. Yeah. I'm dead serious. I've never done the exercise where you actually speak it into something, but I personally think that the exercise itself in your mind is impactful. So I can see how this would be even more.

It feels much more real. And the thing that's interesting is when you send it to someone else and you have a practice where you do this every day, they're listening to your message while they put their makeup on or they're driving. And they're paying attention, but they're not really focused. So to them, they can't tell whether you're talking about something you're grateful for or something that you want. And in their mind, you already have all of those things. And I really believe there's a benefit to having people in your life that see your success as already having happened. Because they treat you that way and they have ideas for you.

And if you're telling people what you want to create, they can help you. Like, we feel like we have to do it all by ourselves. You don't. Ask for help. Say what you want. People know people. They can introduce you. It's not impossible.

I love this tip. I was talking to this woman the other day and she's the one that told me about Joe Despensas' meditation and what you do is you meditate on the future of what you want in the future and what you want to happen. It's very in line with what you're saying, like manifestation. And she said she was so excited because she's been doing the meditation for a year and she goes to this Joe Dispenza event and she talks to Dr. Joe. She tells him I'm meditating every single day. I'm doing what you're doing. And he said, what is your future that you're meditating on? And she told him and it was, you know, she wanted to do this much in business and she wanted to

get healthy, et cetera, et cetera. And he told her, he said, you're not going big enough. Go way, way, way, way bigger to put that frequency out into the universe. And I was talking to Michael about this this morning, and Michael has done that by writing his little list. For him, he writes instead of voice notes.

So I think you could also write down this extravagant future too, right? You totally can. Yeah. You totally can. Okay. For some reason, for me, I like to say it out loud. it feels more like it's in my body when I say it out loud. That makes sense.

And I can also do it while I'm like going for a walk or something. You know, I don't have to like sit and do it. I can do it in the car before I like have a meeting or something if I'm like running late to doing it that day, you know? But I think this apply. I mean, you've discovered this with content. We've discovered this with content. I remember Lauren and I having a conversation about this podcast. We were down in Cabo.

We just had a conversation like, we're going to have a show that reaches X amount of people that does this. And if you go back and even if you listen, it's like the. bravado and the way we did. Like, there's some really atrocious episodes. But we always kind of, like, you kind of spoke it into existence. Like we went in like, this is what we do. This. We are. Like, there's no background. There was no studying. There was no, like, radio. There was no schooling. It's like, we're doing this show now. Like, we do this. And like, that confidence and the excitement carries you so much further than the research and the whatever. Like, probably today, if you knew what it would have taken to do all of this, you might be like, no, thank you. I'm good.

Probably true. Yeah, right? Same with marriage. Marriage takes a lot. working pregnancy. Right. If you knew everything that you had to go through, I'm just kidding. I know this one's going to hit the nerves, but like even parenting, like, if you tell you, like we tell us stuff like, okay, we're going to raise like a great child. We're going to be great parents. Like we don't know what the fuck we're doing in the beginning.

We're just, you know, like many young parents. We're just winging it. But going into it was like, yeah, we have this figured out. How hard can it be? I mean, it's, you know, if you go into the, you're like, oh, okay, I'm never going to get sleep. It's going to be so hard. I'm not going to get my kids.

All these things. Right. We've just kind of gone in and be like, yeah, we haven't. There's plenty of times we haven't, but like with that attitude has made it way easier. Yeah, totally. I feel like the point of this podcast from what I'm getting is that you have to stop criticizing yourself and tell yourself a different story that is working for you, not against you. Yeah, completely.

If someone wants to start tapping, can you leave us with what they should do? Yeah, I have videos on it on YouTube where there's an introduction. Tell us everything where they can go find it. easy. So my YouTube is YouTube.com slash galadalding. There's a video there where I talk about what tapping is and I lead you through a mini session. It's like five minutes just to boost your confidence. And my belief and my experience is that when you try it, even though you may feel silly, you will feel the difference and you can't argue with how you feel. If you feel a shift, you feel a shift. And to me, that's all that matters. So that's where they start.

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To bring joy to your home with sense the present. bring you closer to the people, places, and moments that matter most. They really capture the scent of a place or memory represents. So they have all different kinds of candles. They have like a New York City one. One of their bestseller has actual notes from Central Park and department stores. I find this to be so cute because I'm very much about five senses. This is the perfect gift because you can add personalization to it. You should know they also have a Los Angeles candle, a beach cottage candle, and a wildflowers candle. So, so cute.

The Los Angeles candle, by the way, smells absolutely delicious. It smells just how you would want it to smell. They have a bride collection, a Star Wars collection, a summer collection. They even have bridesmaids kits on their site, okay? It's also chic because it's reusable. So if you go on their site,

you can see it's like a really cute cup, whatever you pick, and you can use it again, which I think is super chic and fun. And you should also know, and this is really important that they have a 60 to 80 hour burn time. A lot of candles, I feel like I light and they're gone in one second, which is super annoying. I highly recommend checking them out. I'm a fan of the Los Angeles candle, just saying, but you do have to check out the New York City one too because something

that smells like Central Park in a department store, like I don't know what to say. Use code skinny for 20% off all orders of $75 or more at homesick.com. That's h-o-m-es-i-ck-com. Homestick.com. Code Skinny for 20% off. Where can everyone find you and your book? Tell us all about it. Radical Self-Love. Yes. My book's on Amazon.

I've written like two books since then. I'm actually working on my fourth book right now. But they're all digital because I'm just self-publishing them, but I will put them out as paperbacks this year. But Radical Self-Love is on Amazon. And I have a really cool tapping that I'm giving away to your readers about instant orgasms, which... Tell us about the instant orgasms.

Hold on. You got our attention. So I created this because I know so many women have trouble orgasming, either alone or with a partner or they overthink it or they are getting their head and they can't enjoy themselves. So this is a tapping sequence that will help you just literally relax all of the parts of your body so that you can actually feel pleasure and enjoy yourself in bed. And I released it a little while ago.

I get the most amazing feedback from women who have like had their first orgasm ever with their partner or are having the best. sex ever with their partner if they already didn't have trouble orgasming. So that is at bit. dot Lee slash instant gala. You can get the link there. There's like a downloadable audio file. You could listen to it every day if you wanted to just to like build your sexual finesse. Hold on. So I, anyone can tap and the tapping will give you an orgasm. It will unblock the stories you tell yourself about how you can't do it. So like I don't know how to do it. And because I've never done it, I can't or I don't know how to relax or I get stuck in my head or I'm worried about how I look or

this is embarrassing or this is taking too long. All of that stuff, we release all of that in the tapping. And when you clear that out of your mind, you're capable of anything. You'll be swinging from the rafters. You'll have the best time ever. I'm swinging from the rafters with Wu and the Wu vibrator. That's another tip. Do the tapping and get a vibrator. Yes. A vibrator really helps. It helps so much. A lot of people haven't used vibrators, which is fine. But like, give it a try. Yeah. And we should connect you

with the people over there at Wu yeah. Because this is right in line with all that. And like use something on your clit. Like don't worry about the rest of it. Just something on your clip. Don't and if a-

Well maybe we should start the show over and start here. No, if the guy, this is like a big thing that I've noticed too. I've talked to a lot of my friends. The guys threatened by the vibrator they do different things. First of all,

guys can't multitask. No. Like a guy cannot have sex and rub your clit at the same time effectively. Let's just call it how it is. No, absolutely. I mean, unless there's a guy out there that can multitask. Listen, I've given a friend for you.

That's what I'm talking about, about working hard and working efficiently. You know what I mean, guys? Get the help you need. No, like a vibrator on the clit while you're having sex is going to help with the orgasm. You can do your tapping too with it. Yeah. That's going to unblock you. But try a vibrator with the tapping.

Totally. And try, like, do the tapping and then play with yourself on your own so that there's no pressure, right? You're not, like, if you've never had an orgasm before, you don't want to try it for the first time with a partner, because you're probably going to feel, like, embarrassed or like you're being looked at. Just, like, have fun on your own first and see what you can do. But you'll be amazed by what you can do. I also think there's something to be said about telling yourself, I'm multi-orgasmic, and then you being multi-ogasmic. Yes. Yes. You know, like, I think, again, it's going back to the narrative, looping it around full circle. How many orgasms have you had in one

session? Me? Yes. probably like 20 with Michael. Oh, that's so good. I'm really, really, but I'm Taylor, pull that clip. I'm very, very, very comfortable with my husband. Yeah. I've known him for a long time.

We know each other's bodies. And also I, like, I think that like we use different like tools. Like it's not just. But I do think that's part of like getting comfortable with a partner. I mean, everyone knows like one night stand is usually, at least in my experience, it's usually a mess, right? It's like you don't, you're not familiar. You don't really know.

Wipe that smile off your face. This isn't every time, by the way. Don't get fucking cocky about it. No, don't start with the ego because don't go wear a shirt that says I gave my wife 20 orgasms. No, no, I'm just going to pull the podcast. I'm just put it as the main.

I'm going to pin it to the top of all my social channels. Make sure you pull this clip too. This is not every single time. But yes, I think it's important to be comfortable. Yeah. It opens up your blockage and your brain. Yeah. Get a vibrator.

But that just goes to show you like if you are with a partner and you get past all those mental blocks and you're that comfortable with someone and you're that open, like, clearly that has something to do with it, right? Because a lot of why you're not reaching that peak is because of what you're telling yourself and what you believe about yourself. A hundred percent. And when you change that, everything changes. When she's sleeping at night, I'm just tapping the shit over him. I'm like, well, Michael is the best lover. Best lover on the planet. You're right, though, that it is important to practice by yourself because I think that I'm able to set orgasm so many times by myself, that doing it with my partner is, it feels natural. Yeah, it's easy. You know your

body. Yeah. Also, I think it has to do with just being comfortable in your body. Like, right now, the most comfortable. I can't, you know. Yeah. This is pregnancy sex isn't my favorite thing in the world. Yeah, that seems challenging. It requires a maneuvering. Yeah. The positions are interesting. They're like a stacks of pillows. Like, how does that work? You don't have as many options, is what I would say. I told him, have you ever seen the movie Road Trip? Have you ever seen it, Megan? Okay, the guy that's like so skinny and then like the girl gets on top and she's like 800 pounds. I feel like I'm going to squish Like a flea.

You know, I'm this It's, I think it's also It's also, um, the first time around I was freaked out because I was like there's a, he thought his dick was going to touch the head of the baby. Yes, you did. No, it's not just that. You like feel the, you like feel the child like this,

especially at this day. No, you can. What? No, not with my dick with my hand. With my hand. Okay. Be clear. You're not, the penis isn't tapping the baby. Yeah.

I'm not like giving the neck massage you a baby with like. dick. I'm saying I say I have you can feel what you're saying. I'm saying like if you have if I have my hand on her stomach now I can feel the child especially at this point. Wow. And so it's just an interesting dynamic where you're like and you're like I'm not just having sex with my wife. I'm having sex with like two people right now. In the beginning like in the beginning as a man you feel excited. You're like oh I like impregnated my wife and it's like kind of a thing and then later like oh wait now I feel the child and like maybe I don't want to like be. In the beginning. I'm like, be as wild and then you're like now then it's like gets closer like okay like this thing's right

there it's very good for you to have sex pregnant though we had a holistic birth person on the podcast and it's very good to have as much sex as possible i was also super nervous in the beginning because i didn't know how rough i could be right so you're like then you're like kind of like kid gloves you're like oh i don't want to like your penis is not like public service announcement your dick is not going to touch the baby yeah but a lot of guys don't know that because i'm telling everyone in the world turn it up your dick is not going to touch I learned this. That's sweet and cute that you think that.

You think as a guy that it's like the baby's like right there, but then you realize it's not even... You know what I love about this podcast? We go from radical self-love to tapping to all the benefits of tapping. Some nice woman's in her car with her children just flew off the road because, you know, she thought she was listening to Louie Hayes and now here we are. Here's the move. Download your tapping app. Yeah. About the orgasm.

Get a vibrator. Yeah. Incorporate tapping. Yeah. Read radical self-love and you're good to go. Yeah. And like tap in the mirror or at least like Louise Hay says, look in the mirror and just say, hey, I love you. You're awesome. You're doing a great job. Everyone should try it. Where can everyone find you? Pimp yourself out, Instagram, all the things. At gala darling. Gallagalling.com. I have a podcast called Gala Loves Everything where I get excited about stuff. And YouTube. I adore you. Thank you so much for coming on. Thank you. I've literally, like I told you've been following you since I started blogging. I'm so flattered. I think you're a rock star. Thank you. I think the same. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you for coming on. Do you want to win some skinny confidential goodies? All you have to do is tell us on my latest post at Lauren Bostic, who you want to see next on the podcast. We are compiling a list for me when I'm back in action. And we would love to know your feedback. Let me know on my latest post at Lauren Bostick and make sure you've read it and reviewed the podcast on iTunes. And I hope you guys got as much value from this episode as I did.

Before we jump into this episode, I have a groundbreaking offer for you guys, and it is a good one. It has 40% off this product that I'm obsessed with. If you guys have been following along for a while, you know that I have completely kicked alcohol this year, just completely stopped consuming it. And listen, at some point I may go back, but for now, I'm just not consuming it. And I'm going to be honest, it was difficult in the beginning, but now I don't even think about it. And one of the reasons I don't even think about it is if I ever feel the it or if I'm ever out publicly or socially and I want to partake and get a euphoric feeling, instead of alcohol, I take this euphoric,

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