The Bossticks - Julie Bowen - Modern Advice & Unfiltered Hollywood Stories

Episode Date: June 3, 2024

#708: Today we're sitting down with Julie Bowen. Julie Bowen is an award-winning actress, best known for playing Claire Dunphy on the sitcom Modern Family, Carol Vessey on Ed, and Denise Bauer on Boston Legal. We sit down for a conversation about her career, what it was like to work with and meet extremely famous people, and why she started JB SKRUB, her self-care line for tween boys. We also discuss the lack of a market for clean products for men and boys, why quitting can be the best decision you ever make, and how she balances family and her career.   To connect with Julie Bowen click HERE To connect with JB SKRUB click HERE To connect with Lauryn Bosstick click HERE To connect with Michael Bosstick click HERE Read More on The Skinny Confidential HERE To Watch the Show click HERE For Detailed Show Notes visit TSCPODCAST.COM To Call the Him & Her Hotline call: 1-833-SKINNYS (754-6697) This episode is brought to you by The Skinny Confidential Head to the HIM & HER Show ShopMy page HERE to find all of Michael and Lauryn's favorite products mentioned on their latest episodes. Use code SKINNY20 for 20% off your first purchase at jbskrub.com This episode is brought to you by Sunday Lawn Care Sunday is available at Target, Walmart, and Lowe's stores nationwide. Use code SKINNY20 for 20% off your custom lawn plan on getsunday.com This episode is brought to you by Hiya Health Hiya Health fill in the most common gaps in modern children's diet to provide full-body nourishment our kids need with a yummy taste they love. Go to hiyahealth.com/skinny to receive 50% off your first order. This episode is brought to you by Primally Pure If you're tired of discomfort during your menstrual cycle, try the Cycle Soothing Spray from Primally Pure at primallypure.com/SKINNY and use code SKINNY for 15% off your order. This episode is brought to you by Nutrafol Nutrafol is the #1 dermatologist recommended hair growth supplement, clinically shown to improve your hair growth, thickness, and visible scalp coverage. Go to nutrafol.com and use code SKINNYHAIR to save $10 off your first month's subscription, plus free shipping. This episode is brought to you by Pique Visit piquelife.com/skinny to get up to 15% off and a free cup and frother + free shipping for life. This episode is brought to you by Jaspr Visit jaspr.co and use code SKINNY for 10% off your first purchase. Produced by Dear Media

The following podcast is a dear media production. She's a lifestyle blogger extraordinaire. Fantastic. And he's a serial entrepreneur. A very smart cookie. And now Lauren Everts and Michael Bostic are bringing you along for the ride. Get ready for some major realness. Welcome to the skinny confidential, him and her.

There is somebody, and I won't say who, who was like a famously sexy hot man, who I found myself at a part of. party chatting with. And I was like, my God, I walked away. I was like, I can't believe I just talked. That's like a, that's like one of the all-time sexiest hot man, like for the ages. And the party was sort of a circle room sort of thing. And I'm coming out the other side and I see him and I'm with my friend.

I go, I can't believe I'm going to say this, but let's walk fast. He's a real talker. Happy Gilmore, Ed, Boston Legal and Modern Family. You guys, Julie Bowen is on the him and her show. Julie is obviously an award-winning actress. You all recognize her face, I'm sure. She also started a new self-care line for tween boys. It's called J.B. Scrub.

In this episode, we talk about Julie's first break. The process of growing up as an actress in L.A., working with Adam Sandler, balancing work, family, being a mother, the modern family cast, her opinion on quitting, which is super interesting, and why she started her skincare brand. With that, Julie, welcome to the show. This is the skinny confidential, him and her. Taylor's ready.

She texts you four times. I texted him once. I called him four times. You know, Taylor, you are such a liability. We've also known Taylor since we were 12. Oh, I was going to say, how does he have so much job security if he's a guy whose phone doesn't work? You know, Taylor, I say we have very important people coming in the studio with Julie today.

And of course, she's downstairs and she's calling you incessantly over and over. How does he have jobs here? He knows too much about me, so I can't get rid of a member. He does. Okay. I, I, I want to, there's so many, like, ways, it's like an octopus to take this conversation. But first, I want to know, because I'm just curious about your life before fame. Oh, what? Before you were famous. You got to give me a, like a genre of the life, like an area. Give us where you grew up, what you were, how you were as a kid. Give us all the details. I grew up in Baltimore, Maryland, and I'm one of three girls. I'm the middle daughter.

Right. Most people think I'm the oldest, though, because I'm neurotic and I'm constantly, like, looking at the clock and trying to take care of people in that way and make sure everybody gets where they should go. And my older sister is much more fun. Everybody meets her, goes, oh, my God, Molly's fantastic. She is. She truly is. And then my younger sister is also fantastic and is a infectious disease doctor in San Francisco. Yeah. Working on HIV, TB, and, of course, COVID, which everybody loves. So I grew up in Baltimore and, I mean, wasn't allowed to watch TV.

Ever? No, no, we could watch specials. You two are too young with it. It used to be like, it would say like specials and it would be like SPE over the sea. The whole world word would spin over. And like tingles would go up my spine because that meant I get to watch it.

I was so excited. It was like a treat. It was such a treat. And I snuck mash when my mom was doing errands. So my first crush was Alan Alder. naturally. So when you look back, is that the epiphany for when you wanted to be on television? I never thought I did want to be on television. I wanted to be like a serious like theater actor. I wanted to go into Shakespeare and I could never get hired for theater to save my life.

I started getting jobs and soaps and doing commercials and I just and then they were like, it's time to move to L.A. and I thought, no, no, no, I'm going to be a serious actor. And I said, everyone will make fun of me if I go to L.A. And they do, and they did, but I don't care. What was your first big bring? I mean, I was doing, I did a, I did a bunch of commercials. And then I did, as soon as I moved out to L.A., I got this movie, they were doing a showtime was doing a series of remakes of B movies from the 50s that were jailbreak junkies or motorcycle mamas. And mine was runaway daughters. And it was with Paul Rudd. And I was like, I don't know if anyone's going to see this, but this is awesome, and this guy is fantastic. But it was sort of got the ball rolling, definitely.

And then I did bits. I did a few, I did an arc on ER, and you just keep going like that. And then finally, I got a bunch of series that nobody ever saw. But I worked really steadily. Happy Gilmore was probably my first big, quote unquote, break. Do you know what is like seeing Happy Gilmore, Julian Happy Gilmore back in the day as a young man learned? Oh, it was boner. I was shed.

I can't hear that. And my kids won't watch it. And I'm glad, I think. I'm glad. Yeah, it might be weird for your sons to watch it. My son's... But it was, it was like a PG-13 flick. I remember. I think we watched Happy Gilmore together, so you essentially were cheating on me at 13.

With my eyes. Was that the first time? I think we were about 13 years old. No, what year did Happy Gilmore come out? Do you remember? 95? Maybe, no, no, no. Maybe 93, somewhere in there.

No, no, happy Gilmore was like, we were, because I was born in 87. So, but like, but we would watch it later. You people are children. Yeah. You're children. We are? Yeah, your little babies. It's great.

So when you got Happy Gilmore, did you know it was going to be such a hit? Or did that happen slow? No, not at all. I loved Adam because I have always been a die-hardt-s-life fanatic. I watch it all the time, always. Through the good years, the bad years, cast changes. I am like, I mean, my friends call me a chuckle fucker. I don't really date comedians, but I just love them.

I think they're the smartest, funniest people. A chuckle fucker. You've never heard that term. No, I love that. It's a chuckle fucker. Junkies for comedians. Okay. Chucklefuckers.

That movie is still, like you could, if that movie's on right now, people, you still will watch it. It's like, it's a classic. So I'm told, I can't really see it that way. And I got it. And I loved Adam, but he had done Billy Madison, which was at the time, like, a little bit of like a sleeper hit. Like people knew it, but you had to be like an Adam Sandler Finn.

Over time, that got to be huge. And I thought, well, no one's going to see this. And that's fine because my hair's really bad. And I would go to my trailer and be really sad about my hair. But I was having so much fun. I was like, who cares? This is the greatest thing ever. Adam's the nicest, coolest person.

And I was having the best time. And then it came out and I'm like, oh, my hair. Really should have done something about my hair. Your hair? I feel like all I can imagine is like how hot. you looked in that white suit. Oh, in the white, yeah, in my lingerie with two, it was the two pictures of beer, I think, that gave him a boner.

Who is the most fun on that set? I feel like you're going to say Shooter McGavin. I mean, yes. Chris is very, very, very fun. But, I mean, the whole set made me laugh so hard. I'm trying to remember Alan Covert, who was the bearded caddy, who is now one of Adams' producers. I mean, the Adam world goes on forever.

He just takes them with him. And he's hilarious. Come on. And he would have all of his friends from like, I don't even know where they were from. High school or New Hampshire, whatever. It was a constant party on that set. What seems so fun to me is I love when it's me and all the guys. Yes. And I feel like that was you on that set.

It was like you and all the guys. So there was no drama, I would assume. It's just like fun. It was so fun. I really, really coming from a family of all girls and going to all girls schools until 10th grade. and I was so happy to get to, I went to boarding school in 10th grade. I was thrilled that I finally had boys in my class

because I was like, oh, those are my people. Now I get it. Because I was always, I don't think we're allowed to say Tom Boy anymore. I don't know why, but I can't keep track. I just say it in a video. So I should make a dictionary. I'm not sure why.

So my apologies if I'm offending, someone named Tom or I don't know who it's offending. I get it. But I was always more comfortable like hanging out with boys. boys, only I didn't know any, and I didn't know that until I met them. And I was like, yes. Did they all want to hook up with you? No. No, I don't believe you. I'm going to get Adam Sandler on the podcast and ask him that question. No, no, no, no. He had a, I think he had a, I don't remember.

No, they were all like, they were like my boys. Wow. I thought you were going to say, yeah, they all wanted to. Oh, no, no, no. But I imagine it's like, Lauren hangs out with a lot of my guy friends, like, she's great friends with all of them. And I feel like it's like when you're, when you're kind of like, a girl like that that hangs with the, you know, but you're just kind of like in with the guys. You don't think your friends want to fuck me. I hope not. Maybe she's upset.

Kind of. She's a little bit upset. I mean, listen, they're all a bunch of dogs. I'm sure it's an option, maybe, but, you know. So when that comes out and it becomes what it is, were you shocked? Yes, very shocked, but it was also working off, working on something else.

And it didn't, it was kind of a slow role, too. That movie, like, gets every, generation seems to discover it all over again. Like all my kids' friends were like, oh my God, your mom was in Happy Kilmore. And my kids are like, we don't want to know. Oh, that's got to be kind of weird. We don't want to know. They all like you. They're all like, let me see your mom. Let me take a peek. Well, I mean, it's usually like modern family, but then they, but then every generation finds that happy come, we're all over again. So when was the first moment that you knew that it was like as big as what it is? Oh, Lord. I have, I think when my,

dad said that his friends were watching it. And I was like, huh? It's good. My dad's really into golf. And he also was really into giving me a hard time, you know, in a loving way. But he's like, you finally made something I can watch. And I was like, Dad, I'm in lingerie carrying two pictures of beer. Yeah. I don't know if that's the thing with it. He's like, ah, who cares about that? It's about golf. He loved it. So I think that was a bigger, bigger deal for me than anything else. And what was your next big moment after that? I did a TV show called Ed for four years in New York. Yeah.

That, again, I'm excellent at not watching anything that I do. And I'm excellent at leaving it, like, at the door. Like, I do my work. I go home. It's like I do a play every day. It's kind of like you come with your briefcase and leave with it. Exactly. You're not like watching yourself or you're just,

it's just one of those things that's like when it's done, it's on to the next. I don't love watching myself, but more than that, like, the memory of that day was so great. Like, you know, whatever we were doing in the bowling alley with Tom Cavanour, or the day we were like riding camels or whatever. And I'm like, if I see it and it doesn't look like my memory, did you guys film your wedding? Yeah.

I know what you did, because you're millennials. I know what you say. I know what you're saying. You don't want the visual on the screen to ruin the memory. There are times when you're doing something super technical. Usually with comedy, it's not so technical. But I just got done doing kind of a horrory genre show where it was super technical.

actually excited to see that because it was so about effects and technique and like how how the stunt was getting done that it doesn't feel as much like my memory of it was I was like flying across a green screen so I can't wait to kind of see that okay so sometimes sometimes I'm I don't mind seeing myself at what point in all of your career did you decide to have kids and just for me selfishly I want to know how you balanced all that because it's a lot of work uh there is no balance yeah there is This is my patented TM, Julie Bowen, advice for married people. Marriage is compromise. Children are surrender.

And if you don't both surrender, it's going to get ugly. Like your pretty house and like your coffee table that has like gorgeous like table scapes and dangerous sharp objects. It's done. They don't care. They ruin you. They come in and they just take it down. Yeah, it's like. Lauren decided to burnish our whole place and like.

kind of like this like off white color everything. Right before the baby came. You know what though? I feel like we have spent more on cleaning than all of the furniture. They're a little scared. On the dogs. I'm scared too, but it's. But I do have to surrender.

You also have three boys. I have three boys. And you have twin boys. Yes. So this is like you're talking. You're like. But yeah. With one kid you still like sometimes think you can control it, which is the danger.

Because you're like, I can control this. I can. I can. chart, which I did, I can chart your sleep schedule and like graph it to discover the ultimate, optimal moments to put you to bed for a nap, the ultimate. I made that word up. That's a new TM for me. My ultimate moment for you to nap is going to be not at like, it's not at 305. It's at 3.10 p.m. Nap time. I was so obsessive. And then the twins came along and they really broke me, broke me into. Why? Well, because you cannot control three children under.

in diapers, like, somebody's going to be sick. Somebody doesn't want to take a nap. Somebody's crying. You've got to, like, you have to surrender to the chaos a little. So how did you balance? I know you don't like that word, but how did you juggle your huge career? And being a mom of three boys, two are twins. Like, I don't, what is that like when you look back?

Were you just in it? You're so in it and your head doesn't come up. I was pregnant with the twins on the pilot of modern family. Okay. I was eight months pregnant with them. And so behind, I was like, every, any time they show Claire Dunphy, I'm like behind the kitchen. Oh, so you're one of those women that don't get puffy in the face. Oh, no.

My face is so pregnant. When you look at it and not, you maybe it'll be like, okay. Yep. Really? Yeah, my face was very pregnant. My eyebrows were pregnant. My hair was pregnant, but that was good because your hair gets nice and thick. So they, I know.

That's nice. So they just hid you. They hid me. I was always folding laundry or carrying things. But if you know to look for it, I'm clearly pregnant. And so I, people often ask like, oh, did your life change before and after modern family? I'm like, yeah, I had three kids under two. At the same day, modern family was picked up was I was in labor with the twins.

So I was like, my whole life changed because two people came out of me at the same time. And it was total chaos. So I don't really remember a lot of the first year. The cast was like, remember? And then we went to that party. It was so fun. And Julie, where were you? I'm like, I don't know.

Was I there? I have no idea. And when you got modern family, did you realize with Happy Gilmore? Like, did you realize it was going to be so iconic? I knew it was going to be successful. I'd done it. At that point, I've been around long enough to go, oh, I want this, this is a good job. Yeah, it's a good cast, too.

I met the people. I met everybody. I was scared to meet Sophia because she looks the way she looks. So I thought she was going to be. I was like, what if she's awful? Come on. Yeah, but you're absolutely beautiful too. But I met her and she was the coolest, most down-to-earth, funniest person I never met.

I was like, oh, my God, that's the one I was scared of. And she's amazing. And also, I feel like the husband, why can't I think of his name? His name is Phil Donfee. No, his name is Ty Borell. I know. But there's also the other name from married with children. What's his name?

Oh, Al Bundy. That's what I thought. In my head, I thought. Ed O'Neill. I grew up watching Married with Children. That was like... You would be scared of him. Is he nice?

Yeah, he's, they're all. There's not, there's like literally nothing bad to say about our cast. I think we give the worst interviews about each other because we're like, you know, they're amazing. I like that though, though. It feels like a family, like in real life. We got along from day one. We did a project here with Sarah Highland and she was great. It was like she did.

She's the best. She voiced a character for a show we called, called Bone Mary Barry, which was a comedy show, but she did it. She was around. Bone Mary Barry. You mean fuck Mary Kill? It was basically a play on that. Trademark. There was a trademark issue with Fuck Mary Kill.

Somebody trademarked? Yes. So it is called Bone Mary Barry. Who trademarked it? I don't know. Who's someone? Remember when Paris Hilton

wanted to trademark that's hot? I think she did. I don't think it's possible. Well, I know there was some kind of There was some kind of issue where like that somebody has that thing, I believe. I mean, I know that Tyro Banks

was able to trademark smize. Oh, that's, she should start a brand. I'm sure she does or has. I just always found that fascinating. Is modern family when it launched before or after social media? Oh, it was, okay, so it's fun. Here's fun. My first son was born in 2007 in April, and two weeks later, the iPhone came out.

Okay. I remember it well because my husband at the time was like, I'm just going to go pick up some more stuff for the baby, and he was trying to find an Apple store that didn't have it too long of the line. And it didn't yet have all the bells and whistles. There wasn't even a camera on it yet. And by the time we got to 2009, you had a camera on the phone, but not social media. So how was it different having a show like Happy Gilmore that has no social media that blew up for modern family that does have social media?

Well, it's really interesting because some of us did not jump on board social media. Some of us did it like, oh, this looks like it's fun. Right. Like I would dip in and out and then I'd like let an account go dormant or something. And then you find out, no, usually you're not going to get endorsements. unless you have a million people following you or something. I was like, huh? But then you get the Ty Borels of the world,

one of those talented kind people I've ever met. Zero social media people. None. Not an Instagram, not as far as I know, not a Finsta or a Sinsta, nothing. I like that, though. I love that. I love it too.

My dream is now one day to just ride off into a hillside somewhere and never be heard from again or seen some. I just think it's the coolest thing ever. Yeah, especially now because everyone has it. Because, yeah, and, you know, people may, other people, I would never say it, that he, oh, he probably misses out on some big endorsements and stuff. I go, I think he's fine. Yeah, I don't think it matters for this point. I think he's fine.

How many seasons did this, did it go now officially? 11. That's a long time. Yes. And how many years in total? Is that 11 years in total? It's 11 years. In total.

That's 11 years. So you literally saw everyone grow up there, too. Yeah. And my children literally, like, thought that I had a normal job where I went to work every morning in, you know, Century City and came home every night. And then after that, I started going away to do jobs. They're like, what? I thought you just like went down the street and it was all chill.

How did you manage that? I freak out when I have to leave my kids for too long. It's really hard. I made him bring the kids this trip. What did you do? Do you bring him on set? Do you leave him? What's the secret?

Modern family was so lucky. We shot crazy fast. We were often out by, sometimes we're done by lunch. I'm not kidding you. At 6 a.m. And we'd done at like 1 p.m. That's amazing. Sometimes we'd have a big long, long, 12 hour a day, but nothing like most shows.

So I was there and I got to see them all the time. I had to pick them up from school most days. And she's like just, you're just taking pictures. It's Instagram story. She's going to see talking about. Do you know what? Oh my God. Do you know what, Lauren?

I think it's, it distracts me sometimes when you do that too when we're doing this. She looks so cute. And then. I just need a day in the life clip for TikTok. Go ahead. And then see, see, nothing's not content. Yeah, but listen, imagine in my life, I can't even turn around. The reason I started talking on this mic on this show is because she was blasting me out of

everyone. I needed to make sure I could answer for it because it was like, there's just too much out there. So I got to see my kids all the time. And then I turned down a lot of jobs that were out of town. Like in the summer, I would go do a movie and I was like, oh, I'm not doing that. You were meticulous about what you did so it didn't affect the family too much. Yeah, absolutely. I took a job once in Nova Scotia, not really looking at a map.

And my husband at the time was going to be in Long Island. And I'm like, close? No problem. Also, where's the airport? Long Island, you got to go back to the city, Nova Scotia. I don't even know where the airport was. I can't even tell you. It was such a complicated train planes and automobiles to see these kids.

But I made him stay on the East Coast so I could see them. I don't blame you. And I think when you do things like what you just said, it teaches you to be even more thoughtful about what you're doing and funnel it even more. Yeah. Yeah, you pay attention while you're there. You have to be there. Yeah.

And there's always feelings of like, what did I miss? Right. But at the same time, I mean, everyone say, oh, enjoy these years. They go so fast. I was like, get fucked. It is, the days are long and the years are short. But the days are long. We're in it.

We have a... How old are they? Four-year-olds and a two-year-olds. Yeah, those are long... Those, those, those, The days are long. But the years, all of a sudden, I'm like, hey, why don't you guys want to talk to me anymore?

I know. It's so hard. When does that start happening? Well, actually, that's why I made the product that I made J.B. Scrub is they, I think it's like around puberty-ish, but it's like a little bit before that. Like one day they're like, mom, you have to come wipe my butt. Like literally. And the next day, they've locked the bathroom door and you're like, it's like around 10 or something.

They're like, I can take my own shower. where I'm like, can you? Wait, that's so weird that they lock the door. If my daughter locked the door, I would be like, I don't know anything about girls. I would start spiraling. Oh my God, I didn't even think about stuff like that.

Do you have a girl and a boy? An older girl, younger boy. I mean, they're very different creatures from what I hear. I mean, our daughter's like very dainty, but I've never seen like the boy just like crashing into stuff and breaking stuff and banging his head into everything. How do you think three? No, no, you know.

But just trust that when they get to that age, your daughter will have like a 12-step Korean skincare. routine that you will be like, how do you know how to do that? She'll be demanding drunk elephant. And your boy will be maybe pouring some conditioner on his head and walking out of the shower without rinsing it off. And you're like, you smell and you're disgusting. I don't know. Michael Bostick's hair routine is a Korean 10 step. Yeah, he has a Korean 10 step. It's just a slick back. The specific brush, it's a whole thing. It's like, it's really, it's a lot. You, you, this is what this says on the sheet that Sarah Highland gives you credit for saving her life after a violent relationship.

Oh, that's very sweet of her. You were like, it sounds like a mother to her. I was a responsible adult that happened to be around at the right time. But I would, I mean, I'm sure another responsible adult would have done the exact same thing. I just love her. So she's, do you look at her like maternally? Oh, of course. Yeah.

Of course. I mean, I look at her and Ariel and Noel. and, well, RICO was always like an adult, a tiny adult. But yeah, no, I look at them all like my kids. So can you just text them or call them anytime? Yeah. Oh, absolutely. So you guys were like a real family.

Well, I was thinking it's weird because you saw them grow. I mean, how old were they when the youngest were they were 11? Well, Nolan, RICO, Ariel, we're all 11. Sarah was actually just 18 and, but she looked like she was 13. Yeah. She's so petite. Sorry, my salad. I'm burping up my salad.

I'm just going to say it. It's okay. I want to know what kind of salad it was. It was just the salad that I make at home every single day. It's really boring. You're going to have to tell us what that's so far. I don't want to know the salad. That's what fucking kidding.

That's what happens. They want to know. And they'll be mad at us if we don't ask you. What exactly? Here's my salad. It's the same damn thing every day. It is baby spinach, baby arugula, tomatoes, avocados, a little bit of chicken.

Okay. Not much. And then here's the key. Because all of that is just making way for French Poodle, which is the dressing, which we get shipped to my house in cases. And it's a, it's a restaurant maybe or was once up in Fancylandia. Where's like French laundry and stuff up there? I don't know. But I'm ordering it right away.

It is. I would put it on a doorknob and eat it. It's just delicious. What is it like olive oil, lemon and garlic? Yeah. It's a vinaigrette that is really flavorful. and makes everything delicious. Put on chicken,

vegetables, anything. And you eat the salad every single day. Every single day. What are you talking about every single day? You eat it every day? Yeah, but I never change it either.

Ever, just every day. I'm like that too. I like the same thing every day. Every day. I eat a bowl of meat. Like a big bowl of meat. Can you say that this is real? The words that she said.

Every day. Is it cooked meat? No, it's cooked meat. It's ground beef. Every day. Do you know that I grew up eating raw meat? Go off on that. I love raw meat.

What's better? My mom grew up in the Midwest, in the, I don't know, in the 50s and 60s. And we would be making hamburgers in Baltimore in the 70s and 80s. And she was like, take a little pinch, pour some salt on there and pop it in her mouth. And I was like, what are you doing? She's like, try it. It's good. Oh, my God.

To this day. And I stopped eating meat years and years and years ago. And not for moral reasons. I went to boarding school. The meat was bad. I said, you never make me eat meat again. And, but that's the one thing I miss. Is a little bit of raw.

Hamburger meat with salt and pepper on it. Oh, Tickhops. I love that. I'm going to do that. That's going to be the one. That's going to go viral. You're going to go on social and that's what's going to go.

I know that it's terrible for you. And I remember as a kid, I was like, I'm not sure we can. My mom was like, you know, she wasn't a bad mom at all, but she was like, pork is the bad one. That's trichinosis. Beef is fine. Yeah, if you get a good, clean, quality source of beef, like, it's actually pretty good. I don't know what we were getting from.

the AMP was necessarily what you're talking. Was it grassbed grass finished 100% organic? No. But, you know, the meat supplies since then have been altered. Even worse and worse, yes. But I have to say, shout out to Susie. She was a great mom. Hi, mom.

She was not trying to kill us. Yeah, I love it. I'm going to do that to Zaza. Okay. On your podcast, you talk about quitting. I did. I quit the podcast. It's just done.

Go off on that. I would love to hear more about that and how you look at quitting. Well, we wanted to do, I did it with this guy named Chad Sanders, who is... When did you do this? Two years ago. Why didn't we talk at the time? Three years ago, two years ago. There was all that COVID stuff and I don't even know.

It's like when I think about, in my mind, I mean, you guys had babies during it, so, but in my mind, it's like a gray veil over those years. I'm like, what happened? We got through it. That's what we did. But I was not able to do a lot of other work at the time. And I didn't know that, you know, because nothing was. filming. And then I had no idea that podcasting was like full-time business. Yeah. It's full-time.

Yeah. And Chad's also a writer. And at a certain point, I was just like, I'm going back to work. I was going to work on a show. And so we just said, we're quitting. And our show was about quitting, so why not? Quitting things that hold you back. I agree. It's like quitting things that don't serve you to make room for other opportunities that are positive. I have a friend who says that he never feels, he always feels better after crying, throwing up, or quitting a job. Wow, that's a good one. I know. And I was like, wow, that is specific.

But that's true. Like, I mean, obviously a job that you needed to quit. But a lot of people, you know, you get into a rut or a routine or you feel obligations. And by the way, some people, sometimes you can't quit stuff. Right. You know, you get mouths to feed. We're not the luxury of just walking away. But during COVID, especially tons of people walked away from their jobs.

and said, I'm not doing this anymore. And many have not returned. So I thought that was a fascinating topic. I have spent a lot of time making my home non-toxic. And I've really become a practitioner. I've learned a lot along the way. It's taken like two years. And one area that I'm really focused on right now

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They didn't let you film anything during COVID. You guys couldn't have like a little isolated bunker? We did. I shot a couple things during COVID and it was depressing. Because for me it's like I'm not the most social person, and I get my socializing on set. I'm running around, chatting with everyone, to have the best day. They put you in these little, like, tents between scenes, and you're all alone, and you want to go drink water. You go into like a phone booth, pull your mask down, drink. I mean, I was like, this is sad, and this is making me sad.

So I did a couple jobs during COVID. That's what was weird about, obviously we're in the podcast world, and I think it was like a real moment because you could do a lot of these during that. Yes. And you couldn't do kind of in the entertainment world, you couldn't really do anything else. Right. Right. There was nothing. There was, I mean, you could, but it was really, it was really depressing because I realized how much being on a set. I love a set. I love it. I love the grips. I love the electric. I love the camera guys. Like the writers. I like the whole thing. And then I go home and I feel like my social battery is completely full. And I don't need to go out at night. But then going, you know, going at COVID and being between, they go take you back to your tent and sit there. And I was like, oh, this is awful. I totally understand. I get my social from the podcast. And then you go home and you're like, you're good.

You don't feel a need to talk and talk and talk. Right. I used to be a bartender and it was the same. It's like bartending actually is like podcasting and is probably I would assume you get your, you're good. Yes. You're good. You're good. You get filled up. What did you do before podcasting? Nothing to do with anything in media. I was in commerce space and had an ad agency and yet bad manufacturing business. I was all over the place. And you're into, is that hockey on your arm or is that a half? hatchet. These are hatchets. Oh, they're hatchets.

Okay. I didn't know that was a hatchet. I did used to play hockey. What's on your leg? Wait, she didn't know your wife does not know that you have hatchets on your arms. To be honest, I don't think she knows what hatchet means. I think she just calls them axe. My wife is amazing in a million things, but I noticed that like for certain things,

like if it's an axe, it's an axe and it's not a hatchet. Does that make sense? I do. I do because I honestly just took a stab with hatchet. I could have said axe. In my mind, it's 50-50. I'm not going to pretend that I get better. These are called like being 25 and, you know, you're going to be drunk.

They're not drunk, maybe. Actually, maybe. You never know. Yeah, these are things that my mother cried about. Yeah, his mother cried. My tail and all told me that when they're 18, they're going to get tattoos. And I've decided to lean in, by the way, I'm trying this. Instead of being like, no, the fuck you are, which is my gut reaction to almost everything.

Like, I'm going to get a Lamborghini. And I'm just going to, like, ride around. I'm listening to the loud music and get tattoos. I'm just like, that is a great idea. Tell me what tattoo you're going to get. That's a really smart tactic. You know what? And then go past the catch-up and change the subject.

Like, you don't care because they want the reaction. Well, I also really want to hear what tattoo they think is so amazing. Because all I do is like, all I have to do is pick up like a drawing that I have framed from third grade. And they're like, Mom, put that away. I go, why? You're telling me you're not going to always love something forever. and ever always, what if this was on your body? I have a good one for tattoos.

Tattoos, when you have them in 20 years, are going to make you look older because it was a moment in time where they were popular, and trends subconsciously make you look older if you copy them. Does that make sense? Like the bolt on Pamela Anderson tip,

we all know how old everyone is. Yep, or the tramp stamp. Yes, the French manicure, the specific one from the 80s. Do you have a tramp stamp? I'd be so impressed. I saw a dude the other day, and I don't remember where I was,

who had a, and he was got to be in the 70s with like a lower back tramp stamp. I'm like, living his life. I want to know more. Send that to your son. Send the picture to your son. Yeah, you know, I don't regret any of my tattoos. I've waited until I was 25,

but there is moments where like, oh, that's kind of aggressive and you're going to look at yourself. Well, you made sure, I mean, there's not on the neck or the face. He has a coffin on his leg. What kind of music were you into when you were doing this? Metal. I have like the misfits. Yes, it's got to be metal.

How do you know that? Because who else I'm going to cough on their like? Metal and it's, I do have a tattoo that says heavy metal above my ankle. You know,

we can talk about every, every tattoo. I can't. Yeah, don't, don't. It's just so on the nose. It's not even like, you know,

Danzig or mother or something. It's like heavy metal. Should have got my name, bitch, because I, I'm still here. Actually, the funny thing is,

the heavy metal one on my ankle, that was a drunk tattoo. But, you know, I've grown. This is like, But this has been a couple of decades now. Do you still love metal?

I do. All right. You'll like the show actually that I just did then. What is it? It's called hysteria. It's about satanic panic in the 80s. That, wait, I've heard of that. Has it come out now?

Yeah, it's coming out in October, I think. We just finished it. I have no idea when, I think it's coming out October. That sounds good. I was a fan before, but when I have a weird thing where now if I meet, if I meet people, like, okay, so if someone comes on and they've been on a reality TV show, I'm typically not watching. But if I meet them now, I'm like,

Now I'm in. Now I'm in. Like, anything you're doing, I'm in. You gotta watch. And I'm gonna go around and be like, listen, Julie's my friend and like, she told me to watch this. And that's how I roll. I don't, I know nothing about metal. Nothing at all.

But I know that this show is about metal. My character doesn't have anything to do with the metal. I'm the mom that's like, what the hell? Everyone's gonna be possessed by the devil. You never had like a Guns and Roses moment? I could feel like that cup of metal maybe you might like. Really, I think that's metal. I thought that was like hair, hair metal.

That's like the fringe, Taylor's in there having a heart attack because he's like, really, likes no. But like, I feel like... What's Taylor's jam? I mean, his is like... Is it like Danzig, though? Porn hub and metal. Porn hub? Taylor, you're getting...

Oh, that's not good. Yeah. Porn hub. But I feel like that's like... His phone's broken because it's too wet from Austin. But I feel like that hair, like, hair metal, guns and roses like fringe. Am I to drawing you in in the 80s? No?

I could see you having an 80s in a little. A little, but I was like... I was more... I went to boarding school where time has stopped. and like all and everybody still listen to like the Grateful Dead and Kraus yourselves and Nash. Usually the boarding school girls are the ones

How do you know about the boarding school girls? Listen, I know a lot of things learned. This is something that our audience asked you specifically. What is your advice to someone who's unhappy in a situation and are thinking about transitioning or quitting? It depends. Is it a romantic situation? I was just listening to Esther Perel who's like,

you can be closer after an affair. or like people can always get closer and I was like, I'm divorced. And I'm like, don't say that. I don't want to hear that. Like sometimes you sometimes, I mean, I'm great friends with my ex. I had nothing bad to say about him. We just weren't meant to be together. So I feel like take this, whoever your listener is, take it with a grain of salt.

But nobody ever felt worse after throwing up crying or quitting a job or relationship. Like sometimes you do just have to walk away. The key is boundaries. the key is a boundary and the one that I've found I have horrible anxiety. So when I've broken up with people in the past or been broken up with or had to leave something, I have to set a boundary where I cannot touch it or communicate with it or see it or, you know, taste it, feel it for a certain amount of time. And then I'm allowed to revisit it. So like if it's a person, I'm like, can we make a date to talk in a month? Just so, because otherwise there's things, you're like looking at the phone or you're like maybe I should text.

or, you know, doing the going back and forth and that anxiety of needing to sort of touch the connection. Is it still there? Do I still feel it? Do I want it? Do I not want it? And that always helped me keep that boundary. About a month later, two months later,

then there's more reality and you're like, oh, I'm doing much better now. That is such good advice. That is such good. Because you do, you want to keep diving in and just seeing. And you change your mind. But then if you give yourself time, you have more logic around it.

Yes. And also, because the, The minute the person, I'm imagining this is a person, but when they walk out the door, you're like, I've done this, I've broken up with people or had them break up with me. And I'm like, that was the love of my life. And you're like, no, it wasn't. In that moment, everything feels horrific and you want it back. And all you're doing is creating chaos by staying connected, like picking up the phone in the middle of the night.

Are you there? I just was wondering, did I leave my hat at your house? Taylor Swift's scarf in your drawer. You've had some of those. The old leave the item around the house move. The old accidentally left the scarf or the baseball cap. The accidentally left the scarf is like a real obvious one. I got accused of that once though and it made me so mad.

My dad told me something. You know what? Just let the scarf go. It was my underwear and I wanted. I didn't even want it. No, I was like, keep the underwear. I'm out. And I got the call later. Cute move.

And I was like, wasn't a move, dude. Not a move. Just now that we've clarified that. Do you know what else? You also have to block it. their social media. Get it out of your ether. Everything has to be blocked. It's just like, no, they can't exist.

You mentioned Esther Perel. I love her too. What are things that you consume in your private life? Like, what are you reading? What are you listening to? What are you, are you meditating? I do meditate very poorly. Got one of those things that you put in with someone, the muse, it's like the band and it tells you, it gives you birds if you're doing it right.

I don't know what that is. It's like, it's a meditation thing that's supposed to tell you if you're doing it Right, because I was getting really into meditating. I'm like, I'm fucking nailing this. So I got this thing, and it's like a band that goes around your head, and it's sort of like a white noise. And then when you're really hitting whatever it is that you're supposed to hit in meditation, you get these little birds.

That is so cool. And I was like, mine isn't working because I don't hear any birds. My son tried to go, I got birds. And I'm like, well, give that back to me. It turns out I'm meditating wrong. I don't care because I think it's. good for your brain. I listen to,

I do listen to a lot of podcasts. I try and stay away from the news, although I'll deep binge on news for a while and then I'm like, no, it's bad for me. It's bad for my head. Yeah. It's really bad for my head. Especially before you go to sleep.

Oh, no, no. Before I go to sleep, it's usually science podcasts. Something kind of boring, kind of engaging, but also might, you can drop off when they're talking about like finding,

although Utsi, Radio Lab is one of my all-time favorites. And the story of Utsy, the Ice Man that they found frozen in the ice. Please do yourself. favor. When you're listening to it, say your friend Julie told you to. It's amazing. And Brad Pitt has a tattoo of Utsi on his arm.

Whoa, we got to listen. Who brought it back together? Now that I know Brad Pitt has a tattoo on his arm. Now I'm definitely in. Oh, the tattoos are tattooing, aren't they? Jesus. I'm just telling you, Utsi, I'm ready to love. Brad Pitt's newer to the tattoo game, I feel like, or is he had him. Uzi was a man that was found frozen. He's a 4,000-year-old man who was found frozen in the ice because of global warming. And they could track, and by the way, at like the top of a ski run

or something in, I think it was in Italy. It was on border of two countries. And they let him slowly thaw. And they had to keep him in an icy place. But they, he had wounds on him and he had tattoos as well. Utsi,

the 4,000-year-old man. And they could track the last 24 hours of his life by getting out the contents of his 4,000-year-old stomach and they tell this whole story about what happened in the last 24 hours of his life based on the contents of his stomach and what wasn't digested and it's a doozy. I almost want to ask you what was in the stomach, but I want to listen. No, no, no, no, you got to listen. Let me ask both of you something. If I had a tattoo of an ice man and people are like,

what are you doing? But if Brad Pitt gets a tattoo of an ice man, our girls like, that's cool because it's Brad Pitt. It's Brad Pitt. You can do whatever he wants. Yeah, see, there's just some guys that can. Taylor, are you looking at Uthsey right now? It's like O-O-O-T-S-I, I think. Yeah, Taylor, are you looking into Outsi? What are you doing back there? I heard a couple clicks and a squirt.

Something's going on. That's a thing, though. There are people that are on the fringe that they're just, if it's a Brad Pitt, you can do whatever you want and it doesn't matter. Hell yeah. You're obviously so busy. You've got so much going on. How did you decide you wanted to launch a product line?

What was the, were you meditating when you decided? What was the vibe on that? No, it was the, we got into the part when my kids were like, closing the door and coming out dirtier. And I was like, they don't need you in the bathroom. I'm like, you do. You look and smell horrible.

And I would occasionally go stand outside the bathroom and trying to be respectful and not go in. But I'd be like, pits, nuts, butts in that order. It doesn't smell that bad. Pitts, trust, nuts, butts. The feet are the worst at first. That's like the tell. But it starts before puberty. Like, puberty itself, and I should be better about this because I've studied.

a lot about it, but it starts earlier than we think puberty, we're like, you're like, 11. You're thinking of like erections and hair. And really puberty, the hormones for puberty are starting a lot earlier than that. They're creeping in. And because all of a sudden, you'll be like,

sarcasm, what is this? Like, closing the bathroom door and I'm like, you don't have any hair. What do you care? But it starts earlier, and then I was screaming pits nuts, butts, butts, butts, through the door. And my friend was like, it's really gross

and they all want to smell like they all get the advertising on the social media about you know I won't say the products because I won't Smold Weiss schmacks

Hatchet could be Hatchet All this toxic shit is thrown at them And it's all about like getting late I'm like you're 10

and they all want to scare you but it's it starts It's coming Like no I get it But I'm also like that's the bridge we go from baby products. Yeah, she's right.

You go from like honest or one of these lovely like California babies, something great that you're getting at Whole Foods to whatever's in the shower that is like in a gray bottle and smells like, I think like napalm a little maybe or definitely something used to kill bugs. Or it also. It's napalm for bugs. I think it's for humans. Right, never mind.

I'd like to take that back. We burned a lot of people with napal. It's old spicy. I do not mean to make a napal joke. It's strong. It's too strong. It's also filled with chemicals. Yes.

Which their little, like, their skin is changing. Their skin is, like, changing and growing it. And they're, like, everything irritates it. So, like, they need something, they need a gateway into learning how to take care of themselves. It's also, you mentioned a bunch of chemicals. It's disrupting their hormones. It's endocrine disruptors. We had the founder of Branch Basics on this podcast, too.

I love her cleaning supply line. Yeah, I love her too. And what she's done is amazing. And I feel like this is very much in line with it. It's really being thoughtful about what you're using on your skin at all ages. I love this. Well, it's also when it was COVID. We started the idea before COVID.

But during COVID, we were in this like pod with my kids and some other kids and all my nephews. I think there's like, God, eight or nine boys altogether varying from about age nine to maybe 13 or 14. I mean, a ton of them. And we had them test. every single thing. We tested all of the, because we do have a natural, a botanical scent

in the body wash, but it's all completely natural. Nothing on the face has any scent in it. Nothing stays on you has any scent in it. And we had them test every single thing we had them help us with the designs. I mean, we hired design people, they were like, they got the final say on everything.

So we're like, if you like, we're making it for you. Nobody makes stuff for those boys. They make video games for them. Literally I said, what if we put video game character? on that, on the bottles. They were like, ew.

And I'm like, know your audience. Know your audience. I was like, that's, you will sit all day long and watch someone else play a video game on YouTube. You're not even playing. You're watching somebody else play. But if that was on a bottle, a product in the shower, you would think it was, ew.

And they're like, it's for babies. So can Michael and Taylor use this product too? So it's just for, it's for men. It's for anybody. It's just that nobody was, nobody is marketing to and selling to these boys. And they, to take ownership with something that's like lavender or pink, they're like, oh, I don't want to, I may, not all boys, but a lot of boys feel that way. And then they're like, I guess I'm concrete gray and Diet.

Is that, that's something to use Celtic books? I'm looking at him like, get me out of this napalm hole. You got to know, you know, but I'm worried about the napalm hole. I'm super worried about the napole. I remember, like all my boyfriend. I think it's clear at this point that it was a... It was intended not that way. I remember all my boyfriends.

You included much better. I remember all my boyfriends, you included going to their house and like you would hook up with them. And then you would go in their shower and you'd be like, literally there's like dove that their mom bought them from Rite Aid. Or there was like the dandruff shampoo in the green bottle that they... I think what we got was like the Costco big supply that would just last. Kirkland.

It's like, the boys aren't going to, they don't care. And they don't care and they don't need to know. But like, and they also, they also, they need like a real simple. Keep it really simple. Our biggest seller is the face pads because the boys use them basically to wash their face. Because I'm like, wash your face. Like I did. I'm like, that's not what I meant.

But it better, you know, good enough for government work sometimes. Yeah. You just go, okay. And we may specifically don't make it with salicylic acid, which is like what's in like stridex. and, you know, hardcore. I mean, it's not drying. It's much gentler than that. So, you know, you try to give them a way in that doesn't feel like they're just stealing their sisters or mother's stuff and not trying to, like, use shave oil or beard oil on their face.

This is so smart because I can imagine being an 11 or 12 year old boy and you can't, you don't want to ask your mom to buy it. You don't, you don't want to steal your sister's stuff because it's pink and floral. I feel like this market is genius. Well, the moms now have an option to, and the dads have an option to go get something that they're going to use. And is it on subscription if they want to just subscribe? You can subscribe, but it's on Amazon. It's on our website, J.B. Scrubb, S.K.R.U.B.

Because guess what? Trademark. Everything else was taken. There's nothing good left. What was your trademark? Didn't you say you had something trademarked? No, I don't know. We knew. I said, fuck Mary Kill was trademarked. And so we did Bone Mary Berry. You better trademark. I have a trademark now. Now I got that one.

So now nobody can get that one. Bone Mary Barry. At least in the podcast. It actually is a really family-friendly way to play that game. Yeah. It was a, it was a, ish. Yeah.

As family-friendly as. People liked it. They're asking for season two. You know what you should do on Happy Gilmore, too? Yeah. Go on. You should bring all your products to all the guys and have all the guys use them the whole time on set.

Because it's all boys. I will definitely make Adam Sandler do what I want him to do. I would be like, said nobody ever. No. Make Adam Sandler do. do an ad on set. I am, I mean, like, I'm a total believer in our product line because literally we made it, like practically from not like in our kitchen, but went to the lab, did all the testing,

did tested on our own kids. We had some fails, by the way, on my children's skin. I was like, oh, that's bad. What was that? Because we were trying, you know, we were experimenting with different ingredients. They did not make it in. Stay, stay calm. I did not allow that to stay in.

But I'm like, just try it. It's going to sell. itself people, it's good. Like, just do it. And then we find out that all these women are using pads to remove makeup because it's gentle and it's fast. I need to try this. I know. It's really good. So if our audience was to start with one product, there's a lot of mothers who are listening, a lot of millennial women. What would they start with? I mean, the big seller is the body wash in the orange bottle and we're coming out with the juniors, which is like a travel size soon. That's the best. I mean, that's the easiest gateway one because it smells fantastic, but it's not like a lingering smell because it's not artificial.

Really easy. It's in a big wide pump. Like, you're a parent. You're going to appreciate it. Every single step was thought at like, the base is super wide. The pump. Oh, my business partner, Jill, she's wonderful. But she was like, did you try the pump? I was up in Canada doing a movie. I'm like, yeah, yeah, it's great. She goes, which one? And I'm like, the blue one. And she's like, Julie, try the pumps and like would hang up. because she wanted enough to come out in two pumps with the exact amount that that's all you need because if you have a squeeze bottle, you know what it is. No, you can't do squeeze. I can't even do a squeeze. No, because then it's like everywhere. By the way, I still can't do a squeeze bottle

and I'm almost 40 years old, so like nobody wants to squeeze. What happens when you squeeze a bottle? I just can't. You just do it in there. It's too confusing. Your shampoo and conditioner needs a makeover. It does. I don't have a good shampoo conditioner right now.

What happens with your hair when it's doing its own thing? It just. It's not being... Do you know that someone on TikTok, I'm going to tell you this live, called you your hair, Lego hair? Fuck that person. Oh my God, that's amazing.

Like those little snap on. So everyone was commenting and saying, oh my God, it looks like Lego hair. That's probably some bald motherfucker, huh? Wait. Well, I mean, you're there. I'm trying to see. Is it curly?

No. Is it straight? Wait, should we use your shampoo and conditioner on his hair? The shampoo and conditioner is just coming out. You know what though? I should have brought some. He smells so good. No bullshit.

I was in here the other day and I was like, you know, we have the same problem. Okay. Men still have the same problem that your sons have, which is it's an overlooked category with like not a lot of great options. I agree. And so I'm looking now I'm actually thinking like maybe I got to do something because there's not like a lot of clean options. And I want to be able to do my hair, but this product's not great. I'm buying in the shampoo and conditioner. The one he has.

And she doesn't like my shampoo and condition. I'm like, I don't know. Because it's like gray. It smells. It's literally gray and smells. It smells. I know. Listen, I'm a grown-a single woman who's dating and I want to like, I'll go on a date and

smell somebody's head and be like, I don't know if this is going to go any further. But you know what? You don't pass Julie's test. It's like in high school when the boys would drench themselves into a car noir or whatever it was. I remember. As long as it's not napalm. And you're like gagging and they think they smell so delicious.

Or when someone gets on the elevator and it's like so. You know, I don't wear. It's like the Christmas tree in the Uber. The Christmas tree, my son just got his license. No. Filled the car with the black, black ice Christmas trees. Tell them those are endocrine disruptors and they disrupt your testosterone. Is that a fact?

I think so. Do you know what? Good enough. Yeah. I'm telling you. A little lie never heard of late. You know, I stopped wearing deodorant a long time ago. Oh, we're going to go into your body parts.

Let's go. And I don't wear cologne. What do you do for your balls? And I wear Henry Rose, actually. Michelle Fivermermer came out of clean. Henry Rose is. That's the one. That's the one.

What's better? I mean, first of all, you met Michelle Fafer, tell me everything and talk slow. What do you mean? You probably know. I have met her once, but it's like looking at the sun. I have a problem. I can't meet people that I love. Like, I'm a, I, I, I freak out. Mel Brooks came to our set one day because he had, he was doing something next door. And someone took a picture of me hiding. I'm hiding behind a door. Like, what if I, I, what do I have to say to Mel Brooks? You've worked with some of the biggest actors and you're also. It's different. Okay. But like sitting, it's like having somebody like Michelle Pfeiffer is like, I met Merrill Street once and I was like, hey. And like just faded away, like moon walked out. I just was horrible, horrible.

I can't handle it. But I feel like you're doing something similar in a different category. Yes. And she sent me some of her, her Henry Rose. And I was like, you're amazing. It's beautiful. She's beautiful. It smells great.

I talked to her. I was like, listen to Catwoman thing. I got a little bit more. childhood memories. You're on this podcast. All you do is tell people that like your childhood memories. I'm,

now I'm just not that special. You're special. We were very excited to interview you. I think you're absolutely amazing. But actually what I'm saying is that there's not, like I'm trying to think of what the options are for men even now. And there's not a lot of good ones. It's a lot of like.

And they don't know what you don't want to like wear something the women don't like. But then they also, they haven't nailed and and I think everyone, by the way, the rock, Jesus, H. Christmas. I can't even look in your hand. But I've been married for a long time to him. I've been with him since I was, we've been together for 16 years. Was that an upgrade? Yeah, it was an upgrade. Okay, because that's silly. It was an upgrade. It's, it's glass. Wait, what's it's a fake diamond? Wait, what's the fake diamond? It's, well. No, the other one, moistenite. Yeah, yeah, whatever. Moise that sounds very dicey. Wait, what's the fake diamond called? There's a fake diamond. A lab grown diamond.

No, I agree, though, because I think that you can get, like, really amazing products for men, but you have to go to, like, a fan. You've got to go to, like, Neiman Marcus and spend, like, $50. Like, I'm never doing that. Right. I need something at the drugstore. Listen, but it's hard for men because you're, like, you're like, hate the old spice now. You hate this. The women don't like the sense anymore.

You're like, what do you wear? And then you're, like, disgusting if you wear something you think they like. And so I think it's hard your lines on Amazon. I'm like, well, hopefully just like my natural. Your natural aroma. Because I don't want to offend her by wearing the wrong product. Well, when you were pregnant, were you crazy? Everything. I was like, oh.

The smells, I was dying. I was like, please, not that not your deodorant bothers me. And he's like, my non-deodorant bothers you too. Well, he would breathe and it would bother me. So it was like, let me get out my scroll. You know. He had a long eyebrow hair sticking in my face. It was like so much.

Not a lot. Yeah, well, after I became a dad, these eyebrows, I don't know what happens to guys with eyebrow hairs. You need an eyebrow hairs and sneezes. In your line, you need an eyebrow palmade. Eyebrow palmade. Like boy browbrow, which I am obsessed with. But for boys. Oh, I love that.

She used to send me to her friend who I love and they would do, and they would hit my, and I just, you know what? I'm like, I'm married, got two kids. Like, you're going to have to figure this out. Just trim it down. Whatever's going to happen. Just trim it down. You don't want to be like Andy Rooney on 60 minutes.

Pitballs and butthole. My hands are a little shaky. Pits balls. Nuts. Nuts. Butts. In that order. Pits, nuts.

And when they ask you why, you just don't answer. Because what are you going to? Well, because you're. and buttholes really dirty and you're going to drag it up to your pit. No, no, no, just pits. Oh, you have to do it in the order. That order. You start high, you end low.

You guys are so gross. The lufas you guys have to. The lufs, you need to do a lufel line. The lufus. We don't use lufus. Yes, you guys do, and you keep them for 60 years. They're moldy. Moldy.

There's literally rigamortis on it. It's so gross. My grandma was a full Japanese woman. And so I'm... She was a full. I don't... Is that what you meant to say? Yeah.

She was full. I'm a quarter of Japanese. You would never know. Looking at me. But what I mean to say is that the Japanese are very clean people. This is true.

I'm very clean. I mean, I want to tell you that my whole family's German and I don't think I take on a lot of their characteristics. I mentioned this. Because Lauren's doing, Lauren,

he thinks he's really clean. Lauren, I can't have all these women from all my favorite movies growing up and you tell him I'm, I need to be, I'm very clean, Julie. Trust me.

I bet you're clean. But you know what? I don't mind a little natural funk. Yeah, see, there we go. On an adult male. right one. Yeah. And if you got to be like,

the pheromones. The right, yes, exactly. When you're into them, it's magical. And if you're not into them, it's like,

Taylor, do not get any ideas. But they say that if you are attracted to someone's natural pheromones, it's a match. And if you're not attracted,

then it's like you're, you're just not a match with the person. Yeah, that's why I can't, I can never go on a date with somebody who smells, who has no,

I can't smell them anywhere in there. They don't need to be stinky. And I don't, I don't want them to smell like super heavy cologne. I need to get a little, like, like, like, like, are you, like, what do you, are you in there? Because we don't want to be relying on some sort of like, like, you're like the goldy locks of like, that's the perfect one. That's the perfect thing to be just right. Right, right by the ears. If you don't

like that smell right by the ear, it's not a fit. It's not a fit. It's not a fit. You've got to have the right smell. It's just broke up a lot of people's relationships. They're like, oh my God. Well, when people are like, if you have to be, if you have to be squeaky, clean and covered in, in a scent, in order to be attractive to your partner? Let's just think about all the times. It's never going to happen. Our friend Chervine would say that if you have to be covered in scent all the time, you're ignoring your body's signals telling you that there's something wrong.

Wow. Well, they should use the unscended cleanser. That's freaking heavy. Yeah. That's a take it to a dark path. I like how you can buy your products too on Amazon because going into the cosmetics store also is overwhelming. It's too overwhelming.

Yeah, it is too overwhelming. I get it. I have changed my hair. My hair is different hair. It's the weirdest thing. I'm telling you guys, my hair used to be in such a different place three years ago. And I used to have clip in extensions and it was like splitting and shedding and just a mess. And I have done that by changing my hair to burnet, supplementation, and a lot of scalp massage and my bowl of meat. The supplement that I use, you know this, is neutraful. I've been using. it forever. I've had the best experience with it. Nutraful is the number one dermatologist recommended

hair growth supplements with over one million people seeing thicker, stronger, faster growing hair with less shedding. I am one of those people. The shedding is so much less. I sleep on a silk pillowcase so I can see the shedding and I'm telling you like three years ago to now, it's a whole different experience. I personally like Nutraful because it's drug-free. It's physician formulated. but they target the root causes of thinning. And this includes stress, hormones, environment, nutrition, lifestyle, metabolism. They really thought of it all. Get results you can run your fingers through.

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That's the one. And ginger helps with inflammation. And you know I'm all about getting the inflammation under control. You can take your skinny confidential, facial massage balls, and your ginger calming tea and relax. In bed, it's like heaven. Get like a weighted neck pillow, I'm telling you. Head over to peaklife.com slash skinny. That's P-I-Q-U-E-L-I-F-E dot com slash skinny to get up to 15% off and you get a free cup and frother. It's the frother I use every morning for my coffee and my tea. You also get free shipping for life when you start on any of my peak favorites. Lauren and I are breathing rare air, and that is because we use Jaspper products in the home and we clean our air religiously. We worry so much about

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You are swimming in the same waters and the same rare air with a lot of these. And even someone like you, you get, like, there's people in your world, they're like, you get excited about like that. Yes. Like Stephen Colbert? I mean, Stephen Colbert's great. I just wasn't, that's not who I expect you to say right after that. I would die. I mean, I met him one time and I was like, I can die happy now.

But like, okay, so there's certain types of people that if you meet, you, you get starstruck. I get so starstruck and I generally have to run away. It's so crazy to me with who you've worked with. Yeah. It is kind of strange. Those people then become, obviously, they become people, people. And that's the way it should be. But there's like, I would never want to meet.

I never want to meet Brad Pitt. I never, ever. because you guys, okay, you have a following at this point. People probably stop you on the street sometimes or say like... Just throw stuff at me actually. And they, and they're, you're nice to them and it's lovely interchange. But they sort of become then that person that you met and they're off and it's not like a real connection. And I definitely flatter myself like with people like, oh, young Johnny Depp, not old Johnny Depp.

Young Johnny Depp, bless you, Johnny. But young Johnny Depp was like my dream. And he screwed the Viper Room. Jawline was pretty good on him. And like I was so sure that he would see me and we would know. We would just know. We would have the magical connection that of course anybody would have. And that if I met him though in any other way that like if I was like, oh my God, hi, can I get your, can I get your picture and your name, your autograph or whatever?

They're like, you're on the other side. I did end up finally meeting him and it was when I was on the floor on a set playing a clumsy waitress. covered in oyster crackers and none of the crew could remember my name. They're like, Johnny, high-fiving. And he's so nice. He looked up and he goes, I'm sorry. And you are. And they were like, oh.

It's a little different than you envisioned it at the viper room. It was so different. Did you smell above his ear? I was covered in oyster crackers. It was in the middle of a scene. I'm professional. I did not get off. I was like, let me die here.

I think that's the last time I was excited to meet somebody like that, you know? And then you realize, this is terrible. Yeah. I get what you're saying. Sometimes they say don't meet your idols. Yeah. It kind of like that. Yeah. And there is like there is somebody and I won't say who who was like a famously sexy hot man who I found myself at a party chatting with.

And I was like my God, I walked away. I was like I can't believe I just talked. That's like one of the all time sexiest hot man like for the ages. And the party was sort of a circle room sort of thing. And I'm coming out the other side and I see him and I'm with my friend. I go, I can't believe I'm going to say this, but let's walk fast. He's a real talker. And I'm obsessed with that.

I mean, he's a real talker. No, don't. Don't. Don't. No, it's all, it's anybody. No, no, I'm not going to say. I'm not going to say. You know what, though? I think when you work with the crew, like Happy Gilmore, where the guys are just so cool and shooting the shit and having fun. Yeah. And then you get an actor that's a real talker that's a little long in the tooth about how great they look.

Oh. Well, okay. Here's what I say. Or like they have all the stories. I call it pizza. I played a pizza. Because it guys, people would be like, water. One time I was on set and Robert Teniro handed me a bar of water.

You're like, come on. We don't really. It's not everything is about some fucking famous thing that you did. Pizza. I played a pizza. You're like, stop. Just stop. Yeah, I think like the.

I could never. Can you imagine being at dinner with, I mean, that would be really hard with a really famous actor. And he makes everything about himself. I would hate that. And you think you're excited about it. And you think you're going to have a great dinner. And you're just like, when can I excuse myself to the bathroom? It's nauseating.

Well, I think it's always refreshing when you meet people in any occupation that are just like people and they're cool. You're laughing just be normal. But anytime, and I'm not just saying actors, but sometimes you meet certain kinds of people and they're like, they're breathing their own air a little too much. And it's like, then it makes the allure lost. Yeah.

I always think the coolest thing was when you meet someone's like, They know they're very well accomplished, but they're also just rad people. Yeah. The other side, you're like, oh, that's great. I did have the all-time worst run in with a celebrity because I worship this person. And he did nothing wrong, so I will tell you who it is. I was doing Ed, like a TV show about a bowling alley lawyer. So much fun, one of my favorite jobs ever.

But a serious job that's changing the world, but one that I love very much was having a great time. And I was new to New York and there was some fancy thing at the ballet that after, work that day. Someone said to dress and said, do you want to go? And I'm like, okay. I don't even have hair makeup. I just pull on the dress and show up. And there's the celebrity photographer Patrick McMillan who was always sort of like

he was in the inside of the parties. He wasn't like a paparazzi outside. And I walk in and I was like, oh, this is pretty fancy. I should have maybe spruce myself up a little and also I don't know anybody. And Patrick comes over and he's just everybody's host and he's like, Julie,

you look wonderful. I have someone for you to meet. David, Eamon. David Bowie and Eamon. Wow. Have you seen Ed? And I'm like, kill me. Tell me now.

David Bowies definitely doesn't even know what a television is. He's from Mars. And he's like one of the greatest artists that ever lived. And I'm standing there with like burning cheeks going like, please don't look at me. Please don't look at me. And I remember him forcing me together in a picture with Eamon, who was like seven feet of gorgeous.

And it was like seven feet of gorgeous. And it was on page six the next day. And I remember thinking, oh, it's all fake. Like, there we are. We're saying, like, we're best buddies. And I realized in that moment, I was like, oh, every, every, this whole business, she wasn't fake and David Bowie wasn't fake. But the idea that famous people hang out with each other and are having a great time,

I was like, no, it's a lie. It sounds like Instagram. Here we all are. Yes, it is. There you go. It's Instagram. There you go. You summed it all up in one, in one.

That was a refreshing story. Oh, I was dying. I will never forget it. When he passed, I mean, I sobbed. Like, did you, have you ever met him? And I was like, yes. We're good friends, actually. And it's not a good story.

It's going to be, honestly, like, after this, I'm going to, like, be hanging out of my family. And I'm going to see, you want something like, yeah, there's my friend Julie. There's her good Julie. She once had David Bowie. Your mom is going to freak out about Julie. She is. Yeah. Yeah.

Can you tell us, because this won't be out until after about Happy Gilmore, too. Tell us all the things. What do you think's going to happen? what are your predictions? Well, I saw Adam at some, he got the Mark Twain Prize, I think, during the time of great darkness, during the gray, like, COVID-year years.

So I don't know when exactly. Low vibrations. Yep, very low vibrations. And he mentioned it to me there. He was like, you know, we're talking about doing a Happy Gum War II. And I was like, and I said, oh, fun. And he's like, you have to be in.

And I go, as who? I just thought it would be like, like as your love interest mom or like as an old auntie? And he goes, as Virginia Bennett. And I was like my regular character. But like you got to date somebody really young, right? He was like, you're an idiot. So I have no idea.

The short answer is I have no idea what's going to happen in this. You have to go back in the lingerie. You have to go back in the white. This is my pitch. You have to go back into it. You look amazing. You have to be. We all need to see.

that it's inspirational for women, you have to do it. And it's like owning it. I mean, if it's in the script, you'll do it. Of course. Got it. Headline here. Do it. Of course. And plus, and plus also, I feel like we've come a long way in the hair makeup world. And I think I could really knock it out of the park this time. I also think like 60 is the new 40. 50 is the new 20. 50 is the new 20. 50 is the new 50. 50. It's getting. Like a further apart. In 70s, the new 10. Yeah.

I'm waiting. Like, if I just hold on a little bit longer, like, I think, like, you know, AI and robot parts, like, I could just, like, like, like, like, like, a half biotic, you know. Being old isn't as bad as you think it is. I don't think it's bad. I'm actually liking it. You're not that. You're old, though. But I'm liking getting old.

I like actually as a guy getting old. It's easier. I don't, I didn't like the, as much, the younger as much as I like the older is what I'm saying. Well, because dudes get more power when they get older. Women get less. As soon as you, as soon as you send out the. signal that's like, I am no longer creating life in me. Like you send out those pheromones or whatever it is. And like you don't look like someone can fuck you and make a baby. Nature says, we're done with you.

Really? I've never heard it like that. When you stop being able to make a baby, that's when you think the transition is. Well, I think it's somewhere. I think a lot of women, sadly, I mean, the reality is life is long and hard and when you're the sole caretaker for babies and stuff, you're exhausted, maybe you're not in great shape, whatever. So people think that they're not as attractive after they have children. I don't think that has to be the case at all. But I do think that there's a point when you're just like, yeah, I'm not making babies anymore, even if it's your choice.

Uh-huh. And it's not like menopause. It's like, I don't know, I'm not making babies. I'm done with that. That people are like, what are you doing here? I'm going to be 70 in my wheelchair or? Making babies. I'm going to be like, I'm still making babies.

I'm making babies, guys. I'm making babies. By the time you're 70, they probably will have a cure for all of those things, and people will have babies in, like, this water bottle. And then I'll have a half-robot penis and we'll be... And everybody will be fine. Do you think that that's a good idea, robot penis? It depends who you are.

I don't know if it's a good idea, but I know if it exists, humans will do it. You know what, though? I got shock therapy on my foot because I have the very exciting plantar fasciitis. So do I. The worst. Have you had shockwave therapy? No, does it work? It's amazing.

Okay. It's incredible. It hurts and it's loud. It's like a hammer hitting like this, but each time it hits, it's sending some electricity into your foot. Cool. And it is painful, but in a good way. And I'm getting this. And I asked the doctor the other day, I go, what else they use this for?

And he said, erectile dysfunction. Oh, God. That sounds terrible. People do this, too. They're being, like, with electricity shooting out of it. I was like, that's, we had a guy on the podcast. Didn't Brian Johnson do that? Didn't he tell us he did that?

He did shockwave therapy first penis. Taylor, didn't he say he did it? He said he was doing something. He measured his erections when he was sleeping. No, no, but he did some kind of therapy on the penis. When he was sleeping? That's very difficult to do. Well, a sign of youth is how many erections you get when you're sleeping.

That's like a real sign of youth. But, yes. A health. Of health. Yeah, is how many erections you get. And then after the podcast, I had to hear about every erection he had when he was sleeping. I was like, but how do you know if?

if you're having an erection if you're sleeping. Oh, he was, I don't know what you were doing. No, no, no. I would. A piece of, do you put a piece of, a thin piece of string around your penis so that it snaps? He has to wake up. No. Yeah, he does do that.

So, okay, listen, I'm going to give you a rabbit hole to go down. We just had him on the show, Brian. Fascinating guy. But he has, he is the now the most studied human being and he has a team of scientists that observe. Oh, he's that guy. Yeah. I know who this guy is.

Yeah. So he has, it's not a string, but it's like. put a stringer on his dick. It measures at night. But if he was saying is, and it actually makes sense to me, that the more time that you have an erection in the night as a man, it signifies how healthy you are. Okay.

So then for the next 12 mornings, you had to wake up to show me you had an erection. So I would be like, wow, he's so youthful and radiant. He was saying erections during the night. Like each night you should be having multiple erections. While you're sleeping, you don't even know. Yeah, like how do you even know? I didn't measure those.

I don't know. But I was just saying if I was. Julie, we just, this is a lot of information to tell you, by the way. I just don't even understand how you would know how. I feel like there's a happy, there's a sweet spot. I don't get, like, where you're not, you don't actually want to wake up like, listen. Like, with a heart on.

I don't get very squeamish a lot on the show, but this is weird. Is this making you squeamish? It's making you squeamish that you woke me up for 12 days in a row. And I have, I tape my mouth shut in the middle of the night. So I woke up with, what's happening in this marriage? Listen. I tape my mouth shut so I can practice nasal. breathing. And so when he wakes up to show me

this erection every morning, I can't talk. Well, you never, I wake up, I wonder maybe something might happen if I show and then I also am saying also I'm healthy. I'm not over the home. Who knew that the 12 year old version knew that you would be talking to your happy Gilmore crush about your erections. You wife like

I had it. I manifested this one. If let's just say in the middle of the night you actually wanted to utilize the erection for the reasons that nature gave it to you. My mouth is taped. And her mouth is taped shut. Which is, and so... He still disturbs me.

I got you. You interfere with her. It's do not deserve. Sometimes it's better when the mouth is taped shut. Oh, no. You're going to get so much hate. See, listen, I took the napalm bomb for me. Now I'll get the hate.

There you go. You're welcome. Thank you. Now they're going to get me. Where can everyone find your products? Where can they buy everything? Where can they find you? Pimp yourself out.

I'll pimp myself. You can go to J-B-S-K-R-U-B.com or Amazon.com. I think everyone knows where that is. Hopefully soon in brick and mortar in 2025, but that's a process I'm not allowed to talk about. Okay. Apparently, I was like, who cares? Don't we sell everything online now?

But apparently that's the goal. I'm learned a lot. I'm really business. You see my business head is firing. But apparently, yes, we want to be in brick and mortar. Once you do it, you come back because you're really good on a mic. You should go back to do the podcast again. Yeah, you're good on a mic.

You know what? I'm not generous, though. Look at me. I've interrupted like 5,000 times. I have a feeling, Chad, probably wanted to stab my eyes out with a fork. Taylor? No, Chad, her old co-host.

No, Chad, my old co-host. I was like, Taylor. No, my old co-host, I'm like, I think I'd be better maybe on my own. I know. No, I like, though. No, I don't think she needs a co-host. No, I like when the guest is animated.

No, offense. I don't even know, Chad, but I don't think you need a co-host. How does it usually go? Do I, do people sit quietly and wait for you to ask a question? No, no, no, no, no. I should do that. No, it's a conversation. Got it.

Sometimes. We're not like, you. talk, I talk, he talks. What's the conversation? Good. Yeah, and listen, don't worry about interrupting because, again, the audience will complain about me interrupting mostly. And I will just do what I always do and just blindly keep going. Do you guys listen to

do you ever listen to Pivot? Carrey Swisher and Professor Scott Galloway? I'm obsessed. I like Scott Galloway. I am obsessed. I'm obsessed. I got to listen. She is a tech who was covering tech in the early 90s. So she knows every single person. She met them all when they were babies. I mean, everybody from the late

great Steve Jobs to Elon Musk and in between and knows everything. And then she has her own podcast, but then she has Professor Scott Galloway come on. And together, they have great chemistry. And they always interrupt each other and they have fights on the air. And one day they had

Esther Perel come on and talk to them about their relationship. But they're just friends. All the things you love. Yes, she's gay. She's a gay woman and he's a straight man. You know what happens sometimes. I need to listen. Radio Lab about the Radio Love at Utsi. About Utsi, the Ice Man, someone's going to now name their baby Utsi.

I guarantee it, and I'm calling it right now. How did Brad Pitt not name one of his six children Utsi? I know. Maybe he found out too late. Utsi. You want to have another one? Utsi?

Utsi. And yeah, and Pivot, Scott Galloway, he's, I'm into him. I also have a giant crush on him there, I said it. You do. You know, Julie, he has a, if you had your podcast, he's married. Here, Scott, here's a free one for you.

He has a new book out that's around personal finance. It's called the algebra of wealth. See? And if you had your podcast, you could have invited him on and you could have smelled behind his ear. Let me tell you some. But you can invite people on your podcast that you like and you never know. It's a great way to date. You can kill two birds with one stone.

You can smell them, maybe. And then you can tell if someone's a dud or not, if they talk or not, if they're just to drag you on. I like smart people. You could send me a brain in a jar and I'd be like, I'm taking this to bed. A brain in a jar. Yeah, that's all I really like. Adam Silver, the commissioner of the NBA. anyone?

You like that guy? I don't know him. Is he married? Yes, he actually's married. So woman I know. But I'm like, that's the sexiest man alive. And people, too, he is on a traditionally, by traditional beauty standards, he does not score off the charts. I am told.

I don't, I can't even see it. I'm just like, your brain, leap, leap with me, brain. I love his brain. I get, I get the, I'm not into looks anymore. Tony's soprano. Since yours faded. No, he's good looking. Billy Bob Thornton.

Oh, Tony Soprano. So you like James Gandalafini. Okay. So you have a vibe. You get into a vibe. I like, I like a charisma, a thick personality with lots of depth. A thick personality. A little Lego hair.

Listen, hopefully you don't get that mouth tape on it. Do you have a thick personality with a... I got a big personality. I wouldn't have married a thin one. Julie, thank you for coming on. What a pleasure. You guys are a delight. Thank you, Julie.

Come on any time. Two things before you go. you can watch us now on YouTube. So you can go on YouTube, search the Skinny Confidential, and watch our entire episodes on your computer or TV. Also, you should know Michael and I are doing a him and her newsletter. So basically it's a him and her tip of the day, five days a week. And the tips are very specific, as you can imagine.

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