The Bossticks - Kaitlyn Bristowe On Life After The Bachelorette, Lifestyle Choices, Obstacles, & Personal Wellness

Episode Date: November 21, 2022

#518: On today's episode we are joined once again by our friend Kaitlyn Bristowe. Kaitlyn is a Canadian television personality, podcast host, and entrepreneur best known for being a contestant on the nineteenth season of ABC's The Bachelor, and as the lead on the eleventh season of The Bachelorette. She is also the host of the Off The Vine podcast. Kaitlyn returns to discuss what life is like after going on the bachelor and bachellorette, good and bad lifestyle choices, overcoming obstacles, and wellness advice. To connect with Kaitlyn Bristowe click HERE To connect with Lauryn Evarts click HERE To connect with Michael Bosstick click HERE Read More on The Skinny Confidential HERE For Detailed Show Notes visit TSCPODCAST.COM To Call the Him & Her Hotline call: 1-833-SKINNYS (754-6697) This episode is brought to you by The Skinny Confidential. Our BIGGEST sale of the year is coming up on 11/25. Like, 25% off products and 30% off our kits. To get early access, sign up for our email list HERE. This episode is brought to you by Better Help How we care for our minds affects how we experience life. So it's important to invest time and care into keeping them healthy. BetterHelp is online therapy that offers video, phone, and even live chat only therapy sessions. So you don't have to see anyone on camera if you don't want to and it's much more affordable than in person therapy. You can be matched with a therapist in under 48 hours. Get 10% off of your first month by going to betterhelp.com/skinny This episode is brought to you by ZocDoc With Zocdoc, you can see real, verified patient reviews to help find the right doctor in your network and in your neighborhood. Zocdoc is a FREE app that shows you doctors who are patient-reviewed, take your insurance and are available when you need them. Go to Zocdoc.com/SKINNY and download the Zocdoc app for FREE. This episode is brought to you by AG1 You take one scoop of AG1 and you're absorbing 75 high-quality vitamins, minerals, whole food supported superfoods, probiotics, and adaptogens to help start your day right. This is the best option for easy, optimal nutrition out there. Go to athleticgreens.com/SKINNY and get a free 1 year supply of Vitamin D + 5 travel packs with your first purchase. This episode is brought to you by NextEvo NextEvo's Sleep CBD solutions help you get more refreshing sleep, naturally. Get a better night's rest with Sleep CBD solutions from NextEvo Naturals. Use code SKINNY at NextEvo.com up to 25% off subscription orders of $50 or more. This episode is brought to you by Live Conscious Beyond Collagen® is your secret ingredient for bringing out the full radiance of your skin, hair, & nails—promoting skin elasticity and firmness. For a limited time, get your next purchase of Beyond Collagen® with an exclusive 15% OFF for TSC listeners only. Go to www.weliveconscious.com/skinny or use code SKINNY on their site. This episode is brought to you by Clinique Meet Clinique's first ever foundation to be the last step in your skincare routine. Even Better Clinical Serum Foundation is formulated with 3 serum technologies that visibly reduce dark spots, brighten and hydrate skin. Find your shade this holiday season at Clinique.com Produced by Dear Media

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Fantastic. And he's a serial entrepreneur. A very smart cookie. And now Lauren Everts and Michael Bostic are bringing you along for the ride. Get ready for some major realness. Welcome to the skinny confidential, him and her. So I had him on my podcast. I was like, he's got a really good personality.

He comes from a good family. He's super, like, charming and well-spoken and he's smart. Who can I set him up with? And then I was messaging producers being like, you've got to make this guy The Bachelor. He walked out of my podcast, called his mom and said, I just met my future wife. I called the producers being like, you need to make him the bachelor.

So then he sent me a picture of a girl. He was like, this girl really wants to take me on a date. Should I go on a date with her? And I was like, no. And then that was the moment I realized, oh, I think I like him more than just a friend. Caitlin Bristow is back on the skinny confidential him and her show. She has been on the show twice before because she knows how to podcast, which is so nice. It's so much fun podcasting with a podcast host because they just really understand the medium.

If you want to go back and listen to her two previous episodes, she was on episode 68 and 184. You should also know we have been on her podcast too, so go check that out. Caitlin Bristow is one of the most popular bachelor finalists and controversial bacheloretts, which I love. She is an entrepreneur. She has a scrunchy line called duet. She also has a wine label called Spade and Sparrows, which I tried on this episode and it was delicious, the rosé. which I tried on this episode, and it was so crisp and delicious. She also is the host of Off the Vine, a very popular podcast, and she lives in Nashville

with her fiance, Jason, and their two golden retrievers. Caitlin's super approachable, and she opens up in this episode. We talk about all the things. Honestly, I don't know what we didn't talk about. So on that note, let's welcome Caitlin Bristow back to the Skinny Confidential, him and her show, for her third appearance. This is the skinny confidential, him and her. We're back with Caitlin in studio.

The last time we podcast with you was when, Michael, 2019. I pulled it up because I was curious. We haven't seen you since 2019, April. That was before we had kids. Now we have two. Yeah, a lot has happened since I saw you both. Where were you? Okay.

Why didn't you show up to the birth? Like, I was waiting for you patiently. I'm telling you that maybe not the birth, but the showers that you threw. were shower. I have to show a throw a sip and see. No, he's done. No, no, he's not done. She did enough showers and things for the first one. I'm like, you used it up for any other future child. I mean, it really set the bar. I was like, oh, you know, when I have a kid, they're, I'm going to like give him a smash cake on their first birthday. Like, they're not going to remember it. And then everyone looked at me. They're like, you're not going to. You're going to. You're going to throw like a circus parade around your neighborhood. And I was like, yeah, you're right. I am going to. And also it's a moment to drink wine. Yeah, you're right. I will take any opportunity to drink wine. It's such a moment. It is a moment. Last time you were on our podcast, I was blacked out drunk from the night before.

I think that is probably going to go down in history as one of my most hungover days of my life. I mean, you did not look hungover. I just kept staring at your glowing skin and you're like number 27 lashes that used to wear the wispies. I don't know. And I was like, she doesn't even look hungover. It's not fair. I was hungover. Well, you looked great.

Thank you. Yeah. Okay, so first question, because you just walked into studio with your best friend who's been working for you for seven years. Yes. Working with you, I should say. Yes. Because my little sister works with me, not for me. How is that?

What's the hack? Well, Cleo's the most easygoing, positive, perfect human being on the planet, which she's saying no, she really is. Easiest person that I've ever been around in my whole life, just very positive. and has really brilliant ideas. She's very creative. Just so easy to build a relationship with her. And I feel like she's just always had this vision that aligns with mine. And we've both just wanted the same things.

And it's been perfect. So is this after The Bachelor at that you guys start working together? After Bachelor. Well, it was when I went on The Bachelor. When I came off, she was like, you've got a small window of opportunity here. You either sell flat tummy tea for a 15 minutes or. you build something bigger and say no to a lot of money right now to build something greater in the end. And I was like, yeah, let's do that.

What you've done so well that I'm so impressed with, your wine is now in Target, is you've had strategy and intention. Obviously, there's a lot that goes on behind the scenes. Is that something that you feel like has set you apart from other people that have been on the show? Yeah, I think so. But I do credit my team for a lot of that because I probably would have done the same thing that they all did and not thought about it because I went from, you know, making $100 in tips at a restaurant in the day to them being offered crazy amounts of money for a story post that I probably, probably something that I would never use. But I was like, holy shit, that's a lot of money. But I do think, thanks to a lot of good people that were behind me telling me, like, you don't

want to do that if you want to build something greater. And I do think that's a common mistake people make when they come off TV is not thinking about the longevity of a career. Or I feel like they go on with their main intention to get famous or be an influencer and like people can smell it. I think what's so attractive about you is that you, it almost like you have the talent, you have the like ability. And I just feel like you didn't have that like desperate energy with it. Like people just. Well, thank you because I was very desperate. No, they love your podcast. Like you're just very personable. Well, thank you for saying that. I feel like when I went on TV, that was my number one goal was to just like not change who I was.

Everybody that was my friends and family were they knew who I was, like, to my core. I'm like very outgoing, quirky, weird. I'm kind of inappropriate. I drink a lot of wine. And I was like, I'm just, I just want to be that person. I want to like, you know, I'll always get better as a human being every year and like grow and evolve and mature. But I wanted to like stay true to myself.

And my whole family was like, well, we all think you're going to be the drunk girl night one. And you're probably going to get sent home. And I was like, well, if that's my legacy. Like I just, I just really wanted to stay true. to myself. And so throughout that process, I don't know why I found it so easy to do that with all these cameras around and people that I didn't know. But I just, it was really important to me. And I just was like, I'm going to do this. I'm just going to be who I am. I don't want to come off

TV and have my friends and family watch and go, oh, that wasn't you. Like, I really wanted them to watch and be like, God, that's okay. That's why you found it easy. Yeah. Because you were just being yourself. Yeah. Like, I feel like it's such a hard thing. I mean, even like now you've I just saw see to try to be someone else. Well, imagine, like, even doing a podcast for as long as you have or as long as we have. Like, if you tried to be someone else for this, there's no way. It's true. And like Lauren said, people can smell it from a mile away.

I really feel like through an Instagram or podcast, especially because you were talking for that amount of time, people can see through bullshit. And if you're just trying to sell something or if you're just trying to be somebody that you're not, I feel like more now than ever. But when I went on The Bachelor, that's when Instagram just first started to blow up. Like, I remember going from Women Tell All, off the stage, went to sleep and woke up with, like, 300,000 more followers. And I was like, what is this Instagram thing? What is happening?

It was nuts. And it just kept going and going. And I was the first person in Bachelor Nation world ever to hit one million followers. And I was like, when does it stop? What do I do with this? Because it wasn't a thing then. It wasn't like you could build a career. You couldn't sell things.

It wasn't. I didn't know. what was happening. So that's probably now people know that you can get followers from it where you can, you know, smell the desperation. But then I was like, what is this? Why are you the most controversial bachelorette? Is that true? You have that title? Yeah, she has the title. I don't know if I do still. This is what the research says that you're the most, I mean, personally, I'm like down for that title. And let me tell you something about our researchers. They're sitting in a lab somewhere. No. They got all of these data points. Extensive research. I mean, I think that's,

that's what is another thing that makes you intriguing. You're the most controversial Bachelorette, they said. I do like that. I will take that title and wear it with pride because, I don't know, I think it's because I wasn't what the Bachelorette usually is. Like, they usually take the girl next door or like your all-American sweetheart. And I was, you know, this edgy Canadian who was making like fart jokes and like saying dumb shit all the time. And I was kind of offside and inappropriate. And everyone was like, oh, should they, they, never make her the Bachelorette. She's not like all the other girls. And I think that gave, I don't know, the impression that I was controversial not to add to it, but I also had sex with more

than one person in the fantasy suite and talked about it. And I think that was like, whoa to, you know, the Bachelor Nation viewers. And I was like, why are we not talking about sex? Like, I'm a 29 at the time year old woman. Why would I not talk about sex in a relationship? And I think people were like not used to a Bachelorette talking like that. And to me just, I was like, isn't that part of a relationship? If I'm going to marry this guy, he better be good and we'll sack. You know what I'm saying?

I always found the premise of that show kind of strange. Like you're just supposed to get married without trying the goods. Got a test drive the car. Yeah. Maybe a few times. You test drove the car like too much. I was like,

I had to really be sure. I had to get into every kind of nook and candy and make sure that this is. That was enough, is enough, is enough. Listen, I had if you, now I was checking the windshield wipers. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Making sure the fluid was filled up. The engine was running. Yeah, for sure. Question. Everyone wants. to know is discuss the whole dancing with the stars thing. Because there was, there was, there's a timeline of that. Oh, gosh, yes. Like, go back and discuss. The hell happened with dancing with the stars. Oh, yeah. Michael loves juice. This is,

this is actually crazy. I too love the juice. Nobody ever gives me the juice. So when I get a little bit, I'm like to deliver. He loves the rosé. Let's do it. I hope you're thirsty. So when I came off from being the Bachelorette, dancing with the stars approached me and asked me to come on the show. and this was 2016. And I was like, a dream come true. I grew up dancing. My mom was a professional ballerina. Dancing was my passion.

When I was 26, I had to give up on dancing, and I chased a hockey player. And I always felt like I was supposed to be a dancer. And so I was like, this is my chance. I'm going to be a dancer and I'm going to do it. And again, it was good money. And I was like, this is so exciting. Signed all the paperwork. And, you know, I'm a rookie in the TV world.

I didn't know. I had to run it by ABC. I didn't know. I was still under a contract. They were going to announce me. I was going to fly out to New York the next morning to go on Good Morning America to be announced. And the creator of The Bachelor said, actually, no, you're not going to do that. I've decided. And I was like, what? And he was like, no, I'm sick of people going on that show for fame after this show. And I was like, yeah, but a lot of The Bachelors have done it. Why can't I? I've already agreed to it. Dancing is a passion of mine. And he said, well, Sean should be your passion. Michael is not my passion Right Wait okay so back up So this guy This producer

Sean should be your passion Meaning like Sean The Bachelor The guy that I was engaged to Should be over The guy that she was engaged to Should be her passion And I said

You have a newborn baby And you run a huge television show You tell me I can't have more than one passion And he goes My answer is no Caitlin You're not doing it And he said He said mark my words

Nobody from this franchise we'll do that show again. And I said, okay. And so I cried and I cried. And I wrote emails and I tried to like let them see how much I like was excited about it. And Sean even wrote them emails being like, I will support her. I'm not like we can make this work. And then after I finished being The Bachelorette, they had Ben Higgins on.

And when he was done, they said, do you want your own TV show or do you want to go and dancing with the stars? And he picked his own TV show. Nick Vile went on after to be The Bachelor. And they said, do you want to go and dance with the stars? He did it. And so then I raised hell on Twitter and I called out the creator of the show. And yeah, it was a whole mess.

And then everybody. What happened to that? I mean, Nick went on. And then after that, I can't remember if anyone else went on after that. But it had been a few years. I think I can't for, I can't remember if anyone else from Bachelor went on. But people had been rioting for me to go on this show ever since that. So what do you think this guy didn't want you on there so bad for?

I don't know. but I think he just I think that's because everything was kind of going in the direction of people wanting fame after this show and I think he wanted to keep that under control. I'll say it for you. I think that he wanted his own control over women. Yes. That's what it sounds like to me.

And that is, I don't know why I'm beating around the bush because that's, I literally said it on Twitter. I've called him out so many times and we're in a better place now. But at the time I was like, he just doesn't like strong opinion, opinionated women who have power and he wanted to keep me small. And he really did come around. And him and Rob Mills, they were like, okay, you know what? Let's give her this opportunity. We held her back and let's give her that chance now. Let me ask you this for someone who's ignorant.

When you go on something like The Bachelor of the Bachelorette and you sign something like that for people that are wondering, like how long do they have say over what you do? Because I think that I mean, listen, there is a part that obviously they play in giving you this massive platform and driving a shitload of attention that maybe you wouldn't have had without the platform, right? Like, how long do they then kind of control derivatives or rights to your life? So it's a year and then they can have the option to renew it for six months or another year after that. But basically your NDA is lifelong for certain things. But like contract to if I could do a show like two years later, I could have done it when my contract was up. but okay so this fell into like the year window yeah okay wait so just a timeline is this this is after

you you hosted the bachelor this is before that this is before so then how did my question is how did you go from that and calling him out on twitter to then hosting the bachelorette well i think he saw this guy said oh shit i'm getting called out on twitter yeah i think he saw the maybe the backlash or the power of all of my followers who are like hot water here i got to make a little bit of a Left turn strong. Yeah. Crank up the cold water. I am in the hot stuff.

Yeah, he literally was like, oh, you know what? I see the power of her audience. And it only helped them. You know what I mean? Like, it got all of the people who wanted to see me on. It got them voting for the show. ABC's under their network. They're all in the same family.

And then I think they saw how loyal my following has been since I've come off the show. So to bring that audience back to Bachelor World, I think was important to them. because, you know, The Bachelor has been on for, gosh, 20, I don't know how many years, 23 years. I think it's, yeah, I don't know. It's a crazy amount of time. And it's hard to keep your audience for that long when you're doing the same format over and over and over again. And I think they wanted to like spice it up and, you know, they had gotten rid of Chris Harrison,

which was a whole controversial thing. But, yeah. What happened to him again? Or are we not, are we not allowed to talk about it? What happened to him? Well, he made, it was in the, like, heat of cancel culture. He definitely fucked up. I mean, he definitely did.

Oh, yeah. He did fuck up, but they just, they railroaded him quick. Yeah. Yeah. Okay, I remember here. Is there any redemption for him right now? Is he doing anything or you don't know? I don't know.

I saw him at. He was in that moment of time when it was like, we're not taking any chances. Everybody's out. Yeah, you're, yeah, gone. I remember that. He, I don't know what, I saw him at Wells and Sarah Highland's wedding. And he didn't, I don't know if he. He's keeping something hush, hush.

I don't know if he has something planned, but I mean, he's doing just fine. Hopefully he has his redemption moment. But I feel like he got canceled and railroaded, but maybe he can have a moment where he redeems himself. Well, people are definitely upset that he's not the host anymore. And a lot of people aren't watching anymore because of that. I really, really liked your season. I think I like certain, I pick and choose different seasons. Like, I don't watch every single one.

I just pick. It's kind of like housewives, you know? You don't like every single one. Mm-hmm. Okay. So. Who do we look, don't like? Can we throw someone in the bus, say their season sucked or we really like everybody?

You know what's so funny is I, I've enjoyed a lot of seasons. There are ones that are more boring than others. But from Bachelorettes, I can't think of one who I was like, that was a terrible Bachelorette. I can't think of one. Bachelors, I can name a few, but. All right, all right. A little media train, but all right.

I love Emily. Emily was my favorite. She's adorable. Yeah. And I loved when Shane Lomas won. Oh, that was back in the day. Don't date us here, all right? Oh, you know who I watched?

This is going to date me. Trista. Oh, yeah. It's her 50th birthday at the end of November. And we're going. She was great. Yeah. Oh, my gosh.

And she's just a light. Like, she's amazing. This show is sponsored by BetterHelp. We recently had the holistic psychologist on the podcast and that was so eye-opening for me and for Michael about the importance of therapy. We talked a lot about trauma and therapy and just how it can help you so much. And I could not be more excited and proud to have better help online therapy as someone who is a sponsor of the show because this is such an efficient, effective way that's seamless to get therapy online. You don't have to get in the car. You don't have to have

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You're going to go to betterhelp.com slash skinny. That's BetterHelp, H-E-L-P.com slash skinny. Let me tell you about Zock doc doc. Okay. So when you book a brunch or you're going to a restaurant, you look at the reviews. But what I noticed was I couldn't find anything that I could go and look at the reviews when I was booking a doctor's appointment. So when I moved to Austin, I was introduced to this incredible app called Zoc Doc.

And I could see real verified patient reviews to help me find the rest. doctor in my network in Austin. So instead of going online and like seeing what comes up first because they bought SEO, I could actually see real verified patient reviews and find the right doctor for everyone. And I got to find a pediatrician for Zaza and Towns and a general doctor for Michael and I, I even could find like a holistic doctor, which was awesome. So you should know it's a free app. And it takes your insurance, which is so important. And you can find every specialist under the sun. So even if you're trying to straighten your teeth or fix a back, like if your back hurts or you want to get a mold checked out, they have everything covered.

It's a mobile app that's as easy to use as ordering a ride to a restaurant or getting a delivery to your house. So you can search find and book doctors with a few taps. I think this is absolutely incredible, especially because a lot of us moved during the pandemic and you want a good doctor. You're going to go to Zocdoc.com and find the right doctor that's write for you and book an appointment. You can book in person or remotely. You're going to go to Zocdoc.com slash skinny and download the Zocdoc doc app for free. Then start your search for a top rated doctor today. Many are available within 24 hours, which we love. That is ZOCDOC.com slash skinny. Zoktock.com slash skinny. When did you realize that you were falling for Jason? Like what was the

epiphany moment where you were like, oh my God, I can't believe this. I'm falling for Jason. and he was also in this franchise. Yeah, it was definitely not right away, which I've talked about a lot. But it's, so I had him on my podcast. And I just enjoy, I was like, he's got a really good personality. He comes from a good family. He's super, like, charming and well spoken, and he's smart. But I was like, no bachelor people in my life.

Absolutely not, not dating one. Not because I'm above it, just because I was jaded by it. And so when I podcasted with him, I just kept trying to think of someone in my mind. for him to date. Like I wasn't, I was still processing a breakup with Sean. And so I was like, who can I set him up with? What a great guy. This guy's going to be so good for somebody. Like, who can I set him up with? And then I was messaging producers being like, you got to make this guy the bachelor. He walked out of my podcast, called his mom and said, I just met my future wife. And I called the producers being like, you need to make him the bachelor. Then we just kept talking and

he was like helping me with financial goals. And I was helping him figure out Instagram. He was posting where there was still black on top and bottom on the Instagram grid. And I was like, help me, help you. So then he sent me a picture of a girl. And he was like, this girl really wants to take me on a date. This is months later. Should I go on a date with her? And I was like, no.

And then that was the moment I realized, oh, I think I like him more than just a friend. You guys, I feel like two are like Michael and I, your opposite personality. We're so opposite. He seems more like Michael, like type A organized. And you seem more like me like go with the flow. Yes. I've actually touched. He is an incredible guy.

Well, there you go. Like, you seem like you love having your own business, but you're going with the flow. Yeah, very much so. He wouldn't think, he wouldn't agree with that, though. Oh. He wouldn't say I'm go with the flow, but I am. I feel like you're easygoing. I'm the most easygoing.

Why does he not think that? Because I don't know if I am with his schedule. Like, I don't know if I'm easygoing when it comes to the things that he is. Maybe because he's like so turbo. So turbo. Yeah, I get that. Yeah. Does he wake up in the morning?

4 a.m. Oh, come on, Jason. Sometimes it's 3.45 and his brain just starts going. Other times it's 8, but like, for the, like he wakes up early. His brain doesn't stop. That's perfect, though, when you have kids, because let me give you a tip. Oh, you want to be with someone who wakes up early so you can sleep in. So, like, I love when Michael's like, I'm going to wake up at 5.30. I'm like, great. Go wake up at 5.30. Get all your energy out. Yeah. Let me sleep until 7. It's actually very nice to have them wake up early. But do they, do you hold it against her if she sleeps in? No. Okay. Great. No, I look at it as like my like, like, he doesn't want me to be like like like. It's like the time when like the kids are asleep. Yeah. The dogs are asleep. My wife's asleep. The house is quiet. Nobody's calling me.

It's yeah. It's the time. It's like. That's fair. Does Jason want you to, um, I call it emotional residency. Tell me more. Okay. Emotional residency is when someone has an emotion. Yeah. say they're angry about something or they're really excited about something and they want you to match that emotion. So like if he's super like this morning, we're driving, we're driving to the gym and he's talking like he smoked crack. Well, I've been up for five hours ago. I haven't. I just meditated. I haven't had coffee yet. I got to get to the gym. I need a minute. Like, and he wants to talk about what we're doing in 2004. Yes. How many kids he wants to have. What, what stock should he? And I'm just like, I can't.

That's something. He wanted me to match his energy and like I just can't. Jason doesn't necessarily want me to match his energy. He doesn't care if my energy is there or not. He's talking about that. But that's what it is. Like very much, we had to have a conversation the other day because I'm like you. I need to wake up.

I need to have my meditation. I need to have my coffee. I need to like slowly start my day. And I just can't jump into business. And he'll wake up. And one time he was literally in the. bath. He loves a bath. He was in the bath and I was in bed and I woke up and I just like looked at my phone and I had like a checklist from him of like what needs to be done for like

work and certain things. And I was like, good morning. Like what? That's just how his brain goes. Like the turbo is such a perfect word to describe that. And I'm just like, I mean, sometimes I can hit turbo. Sometimes not a lot. But I'm just like I need to get there eventually. I don't just hit turbo as soon as I wake up and he does. Well, Lauren thinks that I want her to match my, what is it, emotional residency? I just like sometimes want to feel like I'm not talking to a dead moth. You know what I mean? I'm a dead moth until 10.30.

Learn it, live it, live it, tattoo it. I want you to blink back and tell me you're alive in the morning. I need my minerals, my vitamins. Like I tell them, I'm like, wake me up like a cat. It's like a slow process. I don't want to be like, like, like, it's cortisol. all. I will say that once I really like set him, I don't want to say set him straight, but once I was like, look, I can't do this. I cannot wake up and have a to-do list. I need this. I was like, you do this a lot and I really need you to. Then he started like easing back and like sometimes he'll bring a coffee to the side table of the bed in the morning and I'm like, yes, this is what I'm talking about. He like knows now, bring her a coffee and, you know, everyone thinks I might be a bitch when I wake up. But I'm not. I just need some time. coffee and you know what? Why do we think men are so like in authority if they wake up and they're

in like business mode. But if I woke up did that, I'd be a bitch. I know. You can't win. If you wake up slow, like it's like it's not good enough. But if you wake up fast, then you're a diva. The secret is is that us men actually like that check. Like I need her to check me like sometimes. I sometimes start going off the rail and being my own thing. You know, like they'd have that check like shut up, get me the coffee and calm down. I'm like, oh yeah. Like me, okay. Like reset. How hard is it to bring a coffee in bed too? Why is it every morning?

Where is my coffee? Like it's just so set an alarm. Yeah, just that one extra little set. Would you make yours? Make mine too. I'm having a rough time with it. Because I've made my three hours earlier. Him to show me how to work the coffee machine.

It's so easy. Just literally, I don't care if it gets cold. It's the act. Yes. Here's where. Okay, if you don't care it gets cold because that's my thing. I don't care if it gets cold. I'm going to say this on air a hundred times.

I don't care. Yeah. All right. Fine. All right. Easy. Fine. Good.

Everyone wants to know. Do you still talk to Chris? Do you still talk to Nick? And do you still talk to Sean? Okay. What if she's like? I'm talking to all of them all the time. All of them.

And I don't want this to be on air. No, I'm just kidding. Chris Harrison, I did not talk to for a minute because I think I actually. Souls. Oh, I thought you meant Chris Harrison. Okay. Chris Souls, yes. Only because only if he's like I wouldn't call him or text him.

He was at the same wedding as me. We chatted, but that's pretty much it. Nick, once in a while, sometimes we talk about podcast stuff or like a congratulations on your book launch or, you know. Nick, I feel like has this with everybody. Is a love-hate relationship. Like a lot of people can like be like you're annoying, but we somehow still like you. But I feel like he knows that. He knows that.

And Sean, I honestly, we spoke, I don't know how long ago, probably. years. Like when we broke up, we cut off all communication. And then he texts Cleo. I don't know if I've ever said this. He texts Cleo and said, hey, finally, this is like two years after we broke up. And he goes, I'm finally unpacking some boxes from our breakup. And it looks like Caleb forgot to pack my Nintendo. Oh, I know that trick. That's the old, oh, I'm unpacking some boxes and trying to get in with you, trick. But when he texts me and say the Nintendo. Because, it's like a quick, easy way to get a conversation going. But I think he genuinely hates me.

So I don't know if he was trying to get back in. I think he was just like, maybe he had a product launching and he wanted you to talk about it on the podcast. Maybe. I don't know. Guys do do that a lot. Oh, and a guitar. Yeah.

My ex-boyfriend was like, did you have that button up that's brown? I'm like, what are you? No. What if this entire time he's like sitting upstairs in an attic painting you every night? I'm going to write a tail. Swift-ish song about how he wanted his Nintendo back, like the scarf. I mean, that would be a good song. I was got to leave something behind just in case you need to get back.

You did write a song. It did. Tell us about the song. Well, I've written four, but I've only released two. I want to release my third. I just haven't got, I don't have time to go record it. And it takes up my voice is not like freaking Carrie Underwood. I'm not like a great singer.

I can sing. It takes me a lot of voice lessons to like, like warm up my vocals and actually have muscle memory to remember how to sing properly. It actually takes me a long time to get there. Then once I get there, I'll record the song, but I just don't have time. But the first song I wrote, I released it after Sean and I went through the breakup. And it's called If I'm Being Honest. And it was kind of like a it was like a song about how I always try and act tough. Like I'm always on Instagram being like, yeah, I'm strong and I'm confident. But it's basically like I'm not always as tough as you think I am. And I have my moments and I drink a lot of wine and blah, blah, blah. But it was just a song about like,

Well, if I'm being honest, this sucks. Yeah. So what I like about what you've done after these shows is you've created businesses. You've created your wine brand. You have duet it right, right? I pronounced it right. You did. Okay, I just want to make sure.

You did. No, everybody says doot it, which I actually think is hilarious and I don't mind. Okay. Okay. I mean, I've always looked at it as duet it. So I'm glad that I pronounced it right. You did. And you also, you're writing songs.

Like, you're also very active on social media. How are you moving? a podcast for years now. Yeah, and your podcast crushes it. So how have you managed to balance all of that and what is the strategy moving forward since there isn't this show that you can sort of use the platform on? Yeah, I have thought about this so many times like, does being on TV keep me relevant or like, am I at a place now where I can just keep going on my own with my businesses and focus on those instead of trying to do other things to keep me in this one place? But I have had so many burnouts and meltdowns and I sometimes don't know how I.

do all of this because there are times when I'm just like, I get, I get really bad hormonal depression. Like I can't get up out of bed. I'm like in tears. I'm like really crippled with anxiety. And those are the times where I'm like, I don't know how I'm doing this. And I don't know how I can do it or keep going. And there are times where I'm like, I should just stop. And then the next day I'm literally like the energizer bunny. I'm like, why am I not doing anything? Let me go get on a plane and go somewhere and work. And why is this not happening in this? And I get all creative. It's literally like depending on the cycle of period. It's bizarre. So I've just kind of learned to kind of be really in tune with my body of what phases I'm in in my month and when I am like the most creative, when I need to rest, when I need to

work, when I'm like, it's crazy how much that can help. So I feel like I'm more in tune with where I'm at in my days and my life and how I'm feeling. And that helps me be on track. Having an incredible team really helps me because they kind of pick up the pieces when I fell apart. But I just think I've realized, like, all growing up, I thought I was not lazy, but I thought like I didn't have any goals. I was like, why have I not gone to school? Why am I chasing a hockey player? Why am I just like doing things for other people and nothing for myself? And then once I had this platform, I didn't even realize how much of an entrepreneur I was or wanted to be. And I just love working. Like, I never thought I would say that, but it's because I was never doing something that I love to do. And now I'm like, I love it. I love podcasting. I love getting on. every single call with Target wine buyers and the distributors and meeting new people and learning about the wine business and creating products for do-ed-ed-ed, and I just love everything I'm doing. So I think that helps to be able to keep going and not burn out, but I do burn out at least a month.

When you burn out, what do you do? I throw my phone in the gutter. I just cry a lot. I feel like I just curl up in a ball. I can probably say, yeah, I'll sleep. I'll just cry and sleep through like a few days and then I'm perfectly fine again. I feel like when you're an entrepreneur, you have to have those moments where you recharge. I'm reading this book. It's like seven habits of highly effective people.

I've read it. One of them is like it's, and I'm going to like flub it, but it's you, you have to know when to step back and stop so you can recharge to be even more turbo. Yes. I have always done that without realizing it. I always just thought. I thought like I was failing when I took those steps back and like rested. I was like, why am I needing to do this? Like I hate that hustle culture. I feel like you're so right. You need to take that step back. And I always did, but I always felt guilty about it. Now I give myself complete permission to lay in bed for days, cry it out. And then I find that I'm like, oh, that's all I needed. I think the difficulty with being an entrepreneur. And I think about like

school like this is, you know, you go through school and you have a project. and once the project's over, it's done and it's complete, and you're kind of like, that's finish. And I think the difficulty when you're an entrepreneur, and I correlate entrepreneur as opposed to working at a company or someone, because you never really have the moment. It's like, oh, that's done. And I don't have to do anything else. And the reason being is like this entity is kind of like living and breathing and going

and going and going. And if you stop, like at some, it just dies. And if it dies, there's other people that are in that entity that are affected. So it's like, you never really have that. So I think you've got to find moments where you're like kind of like taking breaks and finding time for yourself because there is never like an end point unless you actually quit. What's really helped me is and I just started doing this and it's been life changing is putting creative blocks on my calendar so no one can book over those blocks. Like I'll put writing time or I'll

put like Lauren's block creative time because before I was like letting my assistant like sort of like just put wherever she wanted five days a week. Yeah. And the problem with that is is it's just like, oh, there's free time. There's free time. But if you block it and create it. boundaries around it, I think that that makes you more effective. So my assistant actually knows she has my period in her calendar. And she knows when I'm in certain phases and when to like give me those blocks. Grace. Yes. It's my period of grace time. And I will try and not book like photo shoots or certain things around that because I was like, I know how I function in that time. And it is the smartest thing I've ever done is give myself those few days to return.

And it's like proven in your body that when you're in certain phases of your cycle, you're more creative. So I'm like, that's my time. All right. If you want to check all the boxes in the morning, I got you. 75 high quality vitamins, minerals, whole food sourced superfoods, probiotics, adaptogens in one scoop. I'm not even joking. AG1 by athletic greens. Okay, so it's like a scoop, okay, that you put, I like to put it in my water. I froth it up.

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I feel like what is so valuable about doing that and creating space is you get deep work. Like you can take those two hours and you can dive so deep and then you can be pulled out of it. Yeah. What do you think has made your Instagram account a place that is so open and real and vulnerable? Because I know you started a hashtag. The real Instagram? Yes. Yeah. Talk about why you did that if you're still doing that and how it's been perceived.

So I started that because I grew up in the dance community. And my mom, like I said earlier, was a professional ballerina. And I think you get, I mean, we all do it where we do the community. comparison thing on Instagram and we all think like, well, that girl has the perfect this and she has this and I want this and she's doing this right now and I want that. And we all compare and I was going down the Instagram suckhole of like comparison. And my whole life I've struggled with body dysmorphia feeling like I'm not enough, comparing myself to others. I remember standing in a ballet studio in the mirror and being like, okay, let's all compare bodies. And we would stand in a row and

be like, okay, I want your boobs. My hips are like this. And we'd stand there and all compare. And I found myself doing that on Instagram. And I was like, I am so sick of this Instagram highlight reel. I'm going to just put like, it felt exhausting to be always putting myself on and done up and filtered. And so I was like, it's fun to do that. It's the same reason I do Botox. I get filler. I color my hair. I put on makeup. I like doing that. But I wanted to mix in something real because I was sick of scrolling on my Instagram and not seeing anything that was relatable. And I kind of pride myself on being relatable. And I was like, I'm not showing up like that on Instagram. And so I was like, hey, wait, this is actually what I look like without a filter and without my makeup.

And like, this is what I look like most days. And I did like a hashtag real Instagram. And I have been friends with this girl, Aaron Trelor for years. And I used to work like, she didn't pay me. It was a non-for-profit organization called Rob Beauty Talks. And she has, struggled on her own journey and now she helps others with their body image and intuitive eating and just like living a more well-balanced life. And I had worked with her for so long. I was like, why don't I use my platform to help other people with what I've struggled with and with raw beauty talks? And I kind of like opened up that floodgate, which I didn't know so many people were going to respond to. And so many people were like, oh my gosh, thank you for doing this. And I'm like,

oh gosh. And then I started loving myself more. I was like, yeah, and by the way, I got cellulite too. And everyone was like, you do? And I was like, yeah. And then it just kind of turned into this thing. And so, yeah, I still try and do it. I struggle with doing it a lot because sometimes I don't know how much people want. Like, I was talking to Jonathan Van Nass. I listened to him on your guys podcast too.

I was talking to him about showing your highs and lows on Instagram. And I'm like, do people even want to see your low lows? Like, it's fun to share the highlight real. Do people want to see the lows? So I try and balance and show some real stuff, talk about real stuff. Do the done up stuff, the glam stuff. show more behind the scenes and raw real footage and stuff. But I was really happy with how the community responded to it because it was like, people loved it. Yeah. And everyone is asking me,

this is so crazy. When you tell me you struggle with body dysmorphia, that's wild to me, because everyone asks me how you stay in shape and how you look so amazing. This is important conversation, though, because people just look at you and they think, oh, she's slim, she's tone, she doesn't have anything to worry about and you're here saying that, oh my God, I used to like measure in ballet class whose hip was more tight. Yeah. So everyone wants to know, I have to ask you. Diet, health, fitness, you drink a lot of wine.

I do. I think you look fucking amazing. Thank you. I'm in the midst of losing 20 pounds. You got to give us some secrets. Well, you don't need to lose 20 freaking pounds. But I understand that, I mean, I don't understand because I've never had a child. But I can only imagine how you go from your body being a certain way and then it changing

so much. It's a lot. It's a lot. I can only imagine. I, and this is why I took an eight-week intuitive eating course from Raw Beauty that I was just talking about. But that was after I've done a lot of healing work with therapy. I don't try and limit myself. Like I eat McDonald's once a week. I friggin't love McDonald's. What's your order? Number one. Cain, I know this is weird. It's a weird one. No, I want to hear it. I like fish filet. Oh, I know. Caitlin, fish filet. I know. Listen, the fish filet is, it's a Bonds. Does Jason put up with the fish filet in his car? I feel like he's not a fish filet kind of guy. He's not, but he'll put up with it. I love the fish filet, no cheese, add shredded lettuce and

extra large fries. Should I try it? It's kind of sounds good. It's so good. The last time I had like a job was like 15. It was McDonald's. I crushed McDonald's. I crushed the drive-thru. Oh yeah. I did the front of thing in their soda too. Like what is? When I worked there, I got addicted. I mean, I got addicted. I mean, because Yeah. There's something in it. There's nothing better than... It's called MSG, but you know.

It's called MSG, yeah. Cheeseburger, just cheese and meat, happy meal, fries with a small diet Coke and then an extra burger. Oh, no, try the McKatelyn. It's a cheeseburger and then you put fries on the cheeseburger and then you take McChicken sauce, which is mayonnaise, and you put it on the fries that are on the burger and then you eat it like that. Ugh. It's so good. I'm craving McDonald's.

Well, you should go try the McKatelyn. Give us some health and wellness tips. Oh, yeah. Okay. There's nothing wrong with crushing a number one or, or, you know, Was it number two still two cheese burger meal? Like nothing wrong when you're hungover, feeling a little tired. I think you just have to listen to your body.

And I know that sounds so stupid. But I work out. I do probably four times a week. I lift. I try and lift actually. Like the other day I was like so proud of myself because I could deadlift 125 or 35 pounds. That's good.

That's a lot. Yeah. Yeah. I'm like, I really like lifting weights. It makes me feel good mentally, physically. I like feeling strong.

I try and just overall eat. healthy, but I also am like, well, I'm going to have the pasta. I'm out at an Italian restaurant. I'm going to drink the wine. I just try and not beat myself up for it. And I try to not go to the gym based on what I ate. Like, oh, I ate McDonald's yesterday. I better work out extra hard today because I find that in my body, stress actually does the worst things to me. The worst. That's why I can't do those classes that are like, they're yelling at you with the loud music. Like, I need to lift weights too and just like walk in between. Like, I can't. when it's too crazy. It's too much cortisol. I think it's why so many people struggle when there's such a fixation on like body or self or food because you're so stressed that you're making it. Even if you're doing all the right things, you're making your, you're whacking your hormones so out of balance that it makes it impossible to get the results you want. It's actually true. I just had someone on my podcast talk about this where it's like the stress and the cortisone and the hormone levels that go out of whack when you're trying to diet and like going on all these fad diets is actually doing your body more harm and your body's going to hang on to more of like the fats.

that you don't want because you're not giving yourself the proper nutrition. Oh, my first baby, all afterwards, all I did was worry. And it took so long. And I gained 60 pounds. Well, we all have those friends. It took so long to fall off. And this one, I'm just like trying to be more zen about it. Yeah.

It's falling off faster. But you know, we have those friends that like they never worry and everything. They're in the greatest shape. And you're like, what do you do? Like, why are you like you don't really pay attention to this of how are you in shape? It's probably because they don't have the stress and they're just. And that took me a long time to get there. I never, I'm luckily never had an eating disorder, but I definitely had disordered eating. So I, like, I remember when I moved away from home for the first time, I used to just eat whatever the heck I wanted. I danced six days a week. And then when I moved off on my own, I was going to Starbucks in the morning getting like a white mocha forapuccino. I'd have like, ego waffles for breakfast. I didn't know how to like nourish myself. Yeah, nourish myself. And I gained weight and I'd never gained weight in my life. And I was like, oh, my

my gosh. And I went home and you could tell that people were like, oh, like it was like a significant amount. And I remember feeling so much shame around that. And I was like, okay, well, all the things I've been telling myself are true. I am fat and I do look gross. And I started having this disordered eating. And when I was about 26 and completely lost myself around 27 and I was in the worst place of my life. That's when I started doing therapy and working on myself and realizing, well, of course I have this disordered eating. I grew up in this environment and dancing probably a lot. Oh my gosh, a lot of it. And so I still have to, you know, it's a, I think of my body like a house. When I bought a house, I thought, oh my gosh, I bought a house. I'm set up for success now. And I didn't realize

that every month there's going to be a project to do or you have to make, like there's maintenance somewhere and sometimes it's good and sometimes it's bad and things fall apart and you have to put it back together. And then I was like, okay, my body is my home. Sometimes I'll look in the mirror and I'll start grabbing like barely like skin and then I'll go stop a Caitlin. Like you know what these thoughts are. Now I have the tools to like stop myself, bring myself back to reality and not go down a suckhole of all these thoughts and feelings. And I just think like every day is different. There's going to be something to work on either mentally or physically or whatever I'm feeling. It's always going to be an ongoing project. I'll still have to work on myself when I'm

80 years old and thinking about like the wrinkles that are going to be on my face. Like I have dysmorphia even in my face. That's why I get Botox. That's why I'm like, symmetry is a crazy thing for me. And I want to do. And I have to reel myself in a lot of times when this happens to me because otherwise I can go to a very dark place. Also, I think sometimes when you fix one thing, then it actually makes the other thing stand out more, which is so crazy. 1,000 percent. I have noticed that. I, I, there's things on my body that I used to fixate on, which now they don't even bother me, but I've found something else. Right.

And then if I fix that, it'll be something else. And I've done that. And people give me shit all the time for my face looking botched and, you know, like the plastic shit all the time. And on Instagram, too, but in person, your face does not, anyone that says your face looks bosh can suck a dick. Your face does not look botched. You look beautiful. Well, thank you. You look young.

You look youthful. Thank you. I feel young and youthful. What are you working on? You're in Nashville, correct? Yeah. What are you and Jason working on? your wine is in Target in Austin and anywhere else.

It's in Texas, all of Texas. That is so cool, you guys. Yeah. I'm very excited. Yeah, tell us all the things that you're doing right now. What's happening for you? So we're trying to get the wine everywhere. I wanted it in all targets everywhere.

It's going to be rolling out in Florida soon. And then you can get it online as well. And there's a lot of grocery stores, liquor stores. Like, there's ones in Nashville. There's ones all over the place that carry it. You can just go to our website, spade and sparrows. com and type in where you live. see if our wine's there, but you can get it all online. I just really, I've been the most proud

of the wine lately. I feel like, I don't know, it's just something, like when people try it, I don't have one little doubt in my mind that they won't say like, that's the best rosé I've ever had. I'm obsessed with it. And I just feel like everyone that goes to Target to buy it, they're like, oh, I heard about Caitlin's wine. And I think a lot of people would probably think it's probably shitty wine. I would if somebody came off, you know, a TV show and all of a sun had wine. I'd be like, it's probably not that good. I have all the confidence in the world that you'll like the wine. And I've just worked really hard at getting it into Target and into these stores. And it's so fun. How do you drink so much wine and not get hung over? I get hung over.

Okay. So our wine specifically all has really low sugar. Okay. And love to hear it. Yes. Low sugar, the rosé and the white have low sugar, low calorie, low alcohol. And that actually helps significantly. Like I could drink of all of the wine and not have a hangover in the morning. No way. Swear to you. I swear to you. I'm going to do a test. Okay. If I drink a bottle of this rosé and don't have a hangover,

do you get a hungover easily? I literally will get hung over off three sips. No! I get hung over so easily. I don't know if it's postpartum. Like in Hormon. Maybe start with a glass. Maybe don't have the whole bottle if you get hung around.

I like a glass wine. I like a tequila. I like to drink. I'm just saying like I don't know what it is with me. I can feel it the next morning. That's terrible. I. I'm like an anomaly.

I don't get hungover rarely ever. But I think that's because I drink a lot. My body's like, I feel hungover if I don't drink. Oh my God. Ew, it's so weird. Caitlin, we're going on your podcast.

Where can everyone find your podcast? You, all the things. Where can they shop? Well, I mean, I have that link tree in my bio on my Instagram. I feel like you can find everything there. But my Instagram is just Caitlin Bristosso, same with TikTok, Twitter, all of the things.

but spade and spade and sparrows.com, do edit, and then my podcast is off the vine in grape therapy, and it comes out Tuesdays and Thursdays, and that's wherever you find podcasts. Do you want to do a do edit giveaway? Yeah. Okay. I'd love to.

I don't know if we can send wine, but it depends what state they're in. If they're in Utah, no. Okay. Okay, don't interview in Utah. Can you giveaway wine? I don't know. Okay.

We're going to do a Caitlin basket. Yeah. Oh, I would love that. Oh, so all you have to do is follow. at Caitlin Bristow Okay And spade and sparrows And duet

Okay Follow all those And tell us your favorite part Of this episode On my latest Instagram At Lauren Bostic We are going on Caitlin's podcast right now

So you guys have to go listen to that If you want to get vintage You can go back And listen to Caitlin Michael and I When I was blacked out Hungover in 2020 I'm gonna go back

And then we also We did an interview Like so Vintage at Podcast 1 Oh my gosh Yeah You were on episode 68 of ours back in 2017.

It was, and I remember because we just left podcast one and you just joined and we did it, I think remote or something. Wait, I did your guys' podcast from my car

after I was on the Bachelorette, like really shortly after I was on the Bachelorette. I was sitting waiting for my sushi and did your podcast. And I remember being like, what is a podcast? And you asked me, you said, what do you do for your skin care?

And I was like, huh? And then I asked you in my book too. Yes. And I went, do people really care? And you're like, they really do. And then I realized, if people do care, and I started to care. See, people care. People care.

Man, this is vintage. So vintage. We go way back. Caitlin, thank you for coming on. Come back anytime. Thank you for having me. Hey, guys, wait, don't go. Make sure you enter the Caitlin Bristow giveaway.

She's going to send you some goodies. All you have to do is follow her. She just shared her handle. And then definitely tell us your favorite part of this episode on my latest Instagram at Lauren Bostick. Thank you guys so much for listening. And if you celebrate, happy Thanksgiving. As you know, I'm a guinea pig and I try all different kinds of potions.

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