The Bossticks - Pam Stepnick On The Truth About Kids On Social Media - Pressure, Comparison, & Feeling Like You're Losing Them

Episode Date: April 23, 2026

#964: Join us as we sit down with Pam Stepnick – digital creator and author, widely known as the mother of Jake Paul and Logan Paul. With a front-row seat to the rise of internet fame, Pam shares an unfiltered perspective on parenting in the public eye. In her debut memoir, F** The Pauls, she opens up about the realities of social media pressure, public scrutiny, and raising kids in a digital-first world. In this episode, Pam gets candid about what it's really like to raise sons under constant attention, why fostering creativity matters, and the hard-earned lessons of modern parenting. She also dives into navigating social media exposure, protecting mental health, and the core family values she continues to instill in her sons.   To Watch the Show click HERE   For Detailed Show Notes visit TheBossticks.com   To connect with Pam Stepnick click HERE   To connect with Lauryn Bosstick click HERE   To connect with Michael Bosstick click HERE   Read More on The Skinny Confidential HERE   Head to our ShopMy page HERE and LTK page HERE to find all of the products mentioned in each episode.   Get your burning questions featured on the show! Leave the Him & Her Show a voicemail at [phone].   To learn more about Pam Stepnick and to shop F** The Pauls, visit https://bit.ly/F-The-Pauls.    This Episode is sponsored by The Skinny Confidential  Shop the limited edition Eden Rock x The Skinny Confidential collab at https://boutique.oetkerhotels.com and at http://shopskinnyconfidential.com. While supplies last.    This episode is sponsored by ARMRA Go to http://armra.com/SKINNY or enter SKINNY to get 30% off your first subscription order.   This episode is sponsored by Kion Go to http://getkion.com/skinny for 20% off.   This episode is sponsored by The RealReal Get $25 off your first purchase when you go to http://TheRealReal.com/skinny.   This episode is sponsored by Function Health Join at http://functionhealth.com/SKINNY or use gift code SKINNY25 for a $25 credit toward your membership.   This episode is sponsored by Starbucks Learn more at http://Starbucks.com/partners.   This episode is sponsored by Lululemon Visit http://lululemon.com to learn more.    This episode is sponsored by Sam Edelman Visit us at http://samedelman.com to explore everything you need for spring and get 15% off with code skinny15.  Produced by Dear Media

Welcome to the Bostics, starring Lauren Bostic and Michael Bostick. Together, they are the Bostics. You raised Jake and Logan Paul, which means you either deserve a medal or a very long vacation. I genuinely, though, and Michael does too need to understand what was happening in that house when they grew up in Ohio, when you look back. Very different from the way it looks now. and I think I do deserve a very long vacation. Private jet, fly me somewhere, and treat me, boys, if you're listening. I don't need a medal.

We got one of those a couple weeks ago. I should say we, but Utah. It was a very active household, but keep in mind, Greg and I divorced, that's their dad, when they were like five and seven. So at my house, it was much more calm and serene than it was at his house. It was very full of testosterone. However, when they started picking up that camera and making really funny videos, which I thought were hilarious, you know, that's when it started to get a little bit wild and doing crazy things like jumping out of windows and riding their bikes off picnic tables and just making chaos. and I just let them do it.

As parents, we want to know how you were able to encourage their talent at such a young age and like almost water it. Because you seem to have done a really good job at that. Because I let them be who they wanted to be. And I didn't let any fear. And this kind of goes throughout the theme of the last 12 years or so is I couldn't let my fear get in the way of... them doing what they need to do. And it still happens today. Like, I don't know, driving, you know, razors off razor jumps. And it's, it is terrifying, but I, I trust in God and my faith. And I just have to keep that in the forefront. And so that's kind of how it was. Like you say watering, I like that,

is just letting them be their creative self and not getting in the way. I guess. When is the first time that you remember them picking up that camera? And was there like a shift or an epiphany with it? So they were like 10 and 12. They were both playing sports, mostly football. And their dad will say he bought the camera. I say I did. You really bought it, Pam. I did. But I think he ended up getting one right away too because they're going back and forth house to house. Right. So, you know, they're 10 and 12. They're they going to remember the camera every single time. And that wasn't all they did. either. So I think that he ended up buying one as well, but I know my dad gave us when we were married, you know, one of those big camcorders. And we filmed their births, which was unusual. Like back in those days, they're like 29, 31 years. You let your husband film it up close and personal. We had the, actually the nurse helped us too. They put everything on YouTube. Let's put

the birth on there. Yeah, but we see, so it's in Paul American a little bit. And what's funny is, they didn't realize, well, Logan did, I think, but Jake didn't realize that his birth was on camera until Paul American. I had given, you know, Paul American a bunch of video, and there it was, and he's like, this makes perfect sense. I was born on camera, and he was just dumbfounded, like almost to a little bit tears and why didn't you tell me? But I digress a little bit.

So when they started doing fun things, it was like, okay, well, that's keeping you off the video games out of, you know, maybe some big trouble that they could have gotten in. And I just thought it was really creative. But I had no idea. This was going to, like, go anywhere. They did start their own little YouTube channel. They followed Smosh, Ridiculousness, and the MTV stuff. And which I just, you know, rolled my eyes at.

But when my kids did it, I thought it was funny. But then they got into their. sports in high school and they put that camera pretty much aside for those years. And then when Vine came out, do you remember the Vine? Six Second videos, right? Those were just so fun and creative and I really loved because I'm not, I don't think of creative person at all. I've learned a little bit through them, but I'm not really. And so they were, they were, Jake was a junior and Logan had just graduated, and they started doing the vines. And then that's kind of when I knew, like, hmm, this is becoming like a passion for them.

I still didn't know it would be a career, but they went viral and they're making money. What am I going to say? It's so interesting to me that you say you're not creative because the cover to me of the book is very creative. And, I mean, you must be creative to raise children that are so exceptional. I would say, again, that I'm kind of. of blessed. I say that a lot. I'm blessed. What I am is really supportive. I'm that really supportive parent in the background that you want to do this? Okay, let's do this. You want to, you know,

spill wine on your new bed because it's funny video. Okay, let's do it. Most parents would not do that. And they say no a lot, I think, where I said yes a lot. And I think their dad did that too. creativity again has been learned for me I've learned it through watching them and everyone asked me why did you name the book F the Pulse and I've learned how to use clickbait because that's what I've logged for a year too right and Logan said to me mom you can't name this book something boring you just can't do it and he was like pacing in his kitchen And he's like, I got it. Like what?

He's like, F the Pauls. And I almost fainted. Like, I can't put that on a book cover. And then I, so I'm like, let's soften it. And then I started to realize I could soften it with written by their mother. But we are in that era of people yelling, F, the Pauls. Like literally saying F, the balls. And us being able to now laugh at that.

And the boys spinning that narrative off into their multimillion dollar businesses. You know, it's so funny we were talking and we prep for all these shows and talk amongst ourselves and with the team. And we were talking about your family in particular. And what I was pointing out, I was like, for whatever reason, you guys have been at the center of a lot of criticism. But if you look at the careers, the boys have done a relative, like they've not really had. real, I don't see them harming people. I don't see them having bad messages. I clearly

they're both athletes. I mean, Logan, I mean, they both box two of the most famous and proficient boxers in the history of the world. Right. And are able to do that. Whenever I see them boxing, and I grew up boxing a little bit, I'm like, no, those two can, they can fight. Your sons can fight. They're also in long-term

relationships. They're both in relationships, one as a kid. And so, where do you think a lot of that criticism comes from? Do you think it's fair? Do you think it's been warranted? at times? You think some of it's just unfair and maybe from success? What do you think that comes from? Is it intentional?

I think you nailed it every piece of it honestly. First of all, they have warranted some attention by doing some, you know, strange, crazy things. But they... That too, but when they have done the things

that they have warranted some criticism, it wasn't intentionally meant... When they've owned up to it. To hurt people, and they owned up to it and they suffered the consequences of it. And they paused and they learned and they found out how to be better. You know, a lot of people would have run the other direction and just went back home with their tail between their legs and they just didn't do that. They learned how to grow and be better and reinvent themselves continually. So yes, some of the criticism was

warranted to the degree. Absolutely not. I will stand up to that. I don't care what they've done not they do not deserve the degree of criticism and it continues today like the most of it they they can perpetuate it too kind of what you said do they like play into it absolutely they they're you know jakes jake's got the necklace f the pauls it's all diamonds well listen i grew up like as a huge WWF before it was WWE yeah and there are such a thing as a heel yes where you got to learn how to do so like there is playing to the crowd and the camera Oh, it is totally the heel. He walks out in Cleveland and calls everybody a bunch of blah, blah, blah, like things that make me go.

Do you know what the heel is, Lord? I don't know what the heel is. Well, it's in wrestling. There's got to be a good guy and a bad guy. Like, at sometimes the rock was a good guy, sometimes he was a bad guy. Right? And so you've got to learn to play. I like that in a marriage too.

A lot of people forget. I'd like a heel. Yeah. But a lot of people forget. Yeah, he's the heel. Here the heel. The rock started his career as being the heel. Right.

He was the guy. Now he's one of the biggest movie stars in the world. In the world. And so, yeah, I asked that because I wondered from your perspective that, but also how you managed that as a family and also as a mother when people are talking poorly about your children. It's really hard. It's really hard to navigate that. Again, they teach me. I have had to follow their lead with that because as a mama bear, and I am very, I can be a mama bear, like to the point of I will punch your face.

if I think it's warranted. I have done that. But it's when you're going to hurt my kids, not because you're saying something mean. But I feel that it is really difficult to handle that. You just have to realize where it's coming from. So one of your questions, I think, it was like, you know, how do I deal with that hate? I have to go internally and realize it's coming from people. that are sitting behind keyboards, they have no idea who my kids are, I know who they are,

and that's really all that matters, is that the people around them and the people that matter and love them know who they are, because they are not who they are portrayed online much of the time. And I do write in the book, at the end, I thought, well, this is a little egotistical, but I did want to end it, because there is a a lot of the negative of what we've been through, their experiences, my experience is their mom, lawsuits, FBI, you know, all that stuff. And I, at the end of the book, wrote out literally all their accolades. And since this book has come out, there's like a whole other, you know, list for both of them. And those are the things, that's boring news, you know. Would you rather see a headline that says,

you know, Jake saved animals on the side of the road or the FBI? I was at his house. You know, who's going to look at that? And that you just, I hate to say this, but a lot of it does come from jealousy from people. Well, I guess, you know, the reason I wanted to ask that is we have done this show and have put ourselves out in a public lane,

not to the same degree for a long time. And so I'm always a bit sympathetic to people who put themselves out there and catch flak that I deemed to, that we deemed to be maybe unfair. at times. And I think, listen, it comes with the territory. Everybody that does something publicly or creates stuff. I'm like, unless they're being delusional. Like, that is par for the course. You're going to catch some flak. But to your point, I think some of it's just been unfair and they've done a lot of great things. Okay. There's a follow-up for people with young kids, ourselves included.

Their children are starting to say, hey, I want to pick up a phone. I want to film a video. I want to put myself online. What are some of the things you would caution parents against? it's very heavily in this book because it's basically why I wrote it I felt like a little bit of an obligation as a parent that's been through it with two of them the most polarizing and controversial digital creators I should put it out there because we didn't have a book we didn't have a you know like we say Dr. Spock and all those books you know that you can write them until you go through the experience yourself like I'm not a PhD I can't tell you all the effects. of social media on the brain, but I can tell you from experience, which I think is really important. And I do think that every child nowadays, do not want to be doctors and nurses and firemen and accountants. And they want to be either in the tech world or creators, digital creators, gamers, anything to be famous. And the internet and fame is very dangerous. I'm here to tell you, It's really hard on your mental health.

My biggest thing for parents is, and especially your kids coming up, is you have to know who they're, this is an age-old thing, right? Who they're hanging out with, who their influences are, who they're talking to online. It can't be behind closed doors. Oh, yeah, you just go play your video games and, you know, have it in front of you. Put time limits. Tell them what they can and can't do. restrictions as they get older contracts. You want this much time, you know, to do your

TikTok or if you even want them to do that. Jake's advice would be just don't let your kids on social media. Logan has a much different perspective. But it's, yeah, you sign this contract. You get, I don't know, I'm making this up right at the moment, but like you get all A's, you get this much time. I start to see your grades go down, you know, your time on the internet's going to go down too. But those watchful eyes, it sounds really simple, but I know a lot of parents don't do it. Parents are busy. They have careers, moms, dads are working, trying to keep the house going. It's time-consuming, but it's critical. It's literally critical because the mental health effects, you get bullied, you get harassed, you know, how do they take criticism?

Like even how do your own kids take criticism? If you're noticing that they're really, really a sensitive kind of person, you either need to nurture that in a different direction or I wouldn't put them on, you know, make your kid a, I don't know, what is the creator like that, you know, as a child creator, it's too soon. It's not okay. Well, I think it's interesting to talk to someone like yourself who's, you were the first wave of parents that basically experienced their children.

growing up on social platforms. And before we were talking off air, my parents did not have to experience that because Maureen and I did not get social media and smartphones until we got out of college. I was in a chat room, though, at 13, pretending to sext with guys as a joke with me and all my friends.

I love this story. I wasn't actually, like, sexting. I was pretending like I was using my words as a blogger. We had like AOL chat rooms. Yeah, I'd be like, I'm so hot for you, Bob. Michael, what do you think about this? I was in those chat rooms too.

Maybe I was Bob. You were Bob. Oh, you were Bob. Okay. No, but I mean, we, you know, we had Jonathan Hyde on this podcast who wrote The Anxious Generation and we've been talking about this subject and a lot of, I think I empathize with parents of your generation who were the first wave, who didn't even realize what these tools were and what they were.

You kind of maybe figured it out. We now have built businesses on these. And I think I resonate with Jake in the way where he's saying keep them off social media because you learn what these tools are. And sometimes Lauren and I will go and speak at schools and colleges. And what I always say to the students is like, are you using these things as a tool or as a blind consumer? And if you fall in the blind consumer lane, then you might want to think about that a little bit. Cut your screen time down a little bit. Yeah. Because a lot of the people that we know that have made livings, they've learned how to really detach and use these for what they are, which is tools and connections.

But they're not sitting there mindlessly consuming all day long. And I think that's a really dangerous pit that people can fall into if they're not careful. It really is. There's all this, you know, comparison is the Thief of Joy type thing going on. Like you can just lose yourself in thinking you're supposed to be this way, that way. I mean, we all can do it, even at my age. Like, oh my gosh, am I fit enough? Did I do my Pilates enough?

Did I, am I using the right makeup? Do I, you know, you can get into that and you have to, I love that you. You said that to the kids because if you use it as a tool, it's amazing. It's really amazing. But it also can be really, really detrimental. You mentioned grades earlier about straight A's. I have to ask this. Are we really, are moving forward, do you think that we should focus on grades?

No. I know. This is like I have this inner dialogue with myself where like, I don't really feel. that I'm not concerned about grades. Is that bad as a parent? No, it's not bad. You want them to do their personal best. And we had this issue in our house. Logan, 4.7 student. Oh. Loved school. Wow. Jake, class clown, could care less. Yeah. He didn't care. He was busy making jokes and videos and the teachers criticized him. Why aren't you more like Logan? And he then took even a more negative view, right, towards school. He's last year.

foued against teachers even in the last few years. You know, like, uh-huh. And teachers still mention him into the school, I've been told. Mention Jake and Logan. So I go back to saying, have your child do what they can do best. Every child is different. And everybody, every child is communicated with different. I could say something to Logan that there's no way I could say that to Jake.

And it's even today. Or vice versa, because they take things in. very differently. Logan can take all the criticism in the world. Jake internalizes it a little bit more and it bothers him a little bit more. It's so funny. We have the same kind of children. I know exactly what you're saying. You have to almost make it more digestible for one child. Right. I call it Jake speak and Logan speak. Yeah. And that's just how it is. And you have to learn to do that. And a lot of parents really don't. They treat all their kids the same. And, you know, again, and I'll go back to the grade thing, their dad was insisting that Jay couldn't play football

unless he got bees. And I'm like, he's really good at football. He doesn't care about school. And I was the same way. I was a gymnast. I could care less about school. I wanted to do my gymnastics and have my boyfriends and my friends. But so you can't put that restriction on every child. And I think that the school, the whole school subject is a whole another beast, honestly, because It's like we're in a, I don't know, like we're being let around to do certain things that maybe a lot of kids don't learn like that. If you could homeschool knowing everything you know now and when Jake and Logan have kids. The schools have changed too now. Would you homeschool?

I don't know if I'm smart enough to homeschool. Not you yourself. If you were you right now today with- I would send Logan to school and Jake homeschool. So you would curate it for each child? I would. Yeah, and I, you know, to your, like, I was terrible in school. I was kicked out of all school.

Like, he's bad. He's bad. He's bad. And I never cared about school. Yep. I was always social. I always was self-motivated. You know, I've worked for myself since as long as I can remember.

Yep. But I was terrible in school. And I was, you know, every teacher telling my parents, oh, this guy has a big problem. Never going to make my sister straight A's. Right. And so I always felt as a student, like, a little bit lost. Mm-hmm. because I was being told all the time that I was no good, right?

And I think that in that environment, when I look back, if I see that happening in one of my kids, I'm like, maybe it created some grit, but also was probably not great for the development. It wasn't great for your development or your self-esteem because you might always question yourself, am I good enough, am I, am I, am I? But it does create a little bit of, I'm going to prove them wrong.

And that's kind of where the title comes from. Like when people say that, Logan and Jake, they both want to, and Jake even more, wants to prove that people are wrong. And so it can create that a little bit, but it's a fine line. I mean, telling kids that you're not going to succeed and I just don't understand that concept. I understand positivity. And you have to, again, I go back to know how each of your child, each of your children

has a heart to take in what you say to them. You have to know how to do it. As a family, you guys have obviously shared the divorce, and obviously you're very differing styles and raising the kids. Looking back, what would you change if you could change anything? And what would you tell parents now as it relates to raising their kids and thinking about different parenting styles? So divorced or married?

Because there is a difference, I feel like. I feel like I would not change anything because look where we are, right? And again, I used my faith to say, God has a plan for us all and he executes it. We just do our best. I think that as divorced parents, it would have been nice. Of course, no one likes controversy, but our divorce was very, very bad in those first formative years of the kids' development, they were like seven and nine. And I think that we could have done better if we had been a little bit more cohesive. We had the same goal for them, but we just handled it very

different. But somehow the alchemy of both of our parenting led to where we are. I don't think it's bad that one parent's different than the other. Like I'm the softy, I'm the pushover more. and Greg was more the grit and the, you're a man, and this is what you have to do. And, you know, he was much, much tougher on them. You know, he was more physical with them. He was more verbal with them. And while I don't love that, I think that it's okay if your parents have different styles. I think you have to work together as parents, though.

And that's where the issue comes in. Because if the parents aren't seeing and getting along, that's a problem. And you have to put your kids first. Why was it rough? And I know you talk about this in the book, but looking back, if you could tell the audience a little bit about why it was rough in those formative years?

Because, again, I'm a pushover and very different and I'm a much different person today than I was back then. And I let kind of Greg just walk all over me and walk all over us. And I finally had to like get away from him to develop my own best self, put your oxygen on first. Yeah. Right? So it's that that type of thing.

And I think that I don't have any proof of this, but I think by the age of 12, whatever your kids are kind of developing into is who their core being is going to be. And they're watching you. You know, your kids and young ages, they're watching how you two interact with each other. My daughter is a reporter.

There you go. She's six. She's a reporter. I love that. I cannot get away with anything. Right. She is literally, I went to the bathroom the other day. I didn't even tell you this. And I was like on the phone going pee. I love the reporter. And I, I opened the door and the ear is to the door. I'm not surprised. I fell into the bathroom because she was leaning against the door. And I said to my dad, oh, the reporter's at the door. They are, they are like, it's crazy to even like, even the three-year-old, they were. watch everything you do. It's a lot of pressure. No, I think it's a, it's a lot of pressure. It's a good point, and we are lucky enough to speak to people like yourself and others on this show where it's a reminder. And I think sometimes, and you see this with some kids, like, the kids reach a point

of almost no return. It's like, they're already set. By the time they're 15, 16, 17, like, if they have these habits and these behaviors and these personalities, like, it's going to be really difficult change. But in these formative years, we talk about that a lot. Like, even sometimes if we, you know, like any marriage, if you start bickering or getting into some shit with each other, like, we'll look at each other and say, okay, we got to. It's always your fault, though. Yeah. I mean, you want to also show, like, healthy resolution with the kids, but it's something we think about a lot just because we're aware of it.

And I think a lot of previous generations maybe just. We weren't aware of it at all. We didn't have the internet to teach us a lot of this stuff either, right? So we didn't really know the kids were paying attention to that. And I think that is, it brings me back to your other question, like the different households. when I got remarried to David, we've been married 21 years. He is the polar opposite of Greg. He's even opposite of me.

He's calm, collected, cool, treats me like a queen. And we, so he led by example. He sounds dreamy. He's dreamy. Yeah. So we tried to show them because Greg is all, we just led by example. We didn't talk to. You know, your kids started.

don't listen, by the way. After a certain age. I'm learning that. Yeah. After a certain age, you're done. You can't. So you do your best. Like now, your kids are in that age. You do your best to be your best parents at this age, for sure. This is a great question to ask their mother. What is something that you think is misunderstood about each of them separately? Wow. There's a lot of things that are misunderstood. I think Recently, Jake has dispelled this myth because of Utah and the Olympics and his reaction and how much it was really portrayed in the news and in the media and the outlets, that he has a huge heart.

And I do think that Utah has helped people understand that. Because he got very emotional when she won. Right. Plus, he treats are so sweet. And she puts that on her Instagram, too. And I think that's a myth. Like, he gets in the boxing ring, and he's like, you know, acting like an idiot and making, you know, his opponent mad and saying outrageous things. That's, it's an act.

It's a play. He is not like that when you meet him in person. He's lovely, adorable, huge heart always wants to help other people. People don't understand that about him at all. Logan. Logan is a very strong, powerful personality. And I think what's out there in the world of him being scamming people and taking advantage and not doing the right things. And I hate that word. But that's what, it is so far from the truth. And it's aggravating. It's really probably one of the things that aggravates me the most about what's being out there in the world today. He is the far, everything he does, he does it with passion. wants it to be perfect. Every business you start is not going to be like perfect. People don't understand that.

They hear one thing and then everyone jumps on the bandwagon because the negative is way more fun to get involved in online, right, with these people. And people just build this up. Some of the myths about prime, just not true. It's not, you know, full of red dye colors or whatever they're out there saying. It's just those myths. really get me because Logan has put his heart and soul behind certain things. And so that myth is so far from

the truth. It's... Pam is going to tell you guys the truth over here. I'm going to tell you the truth. You know what's interesting, too, about them? To me, you would think that they would be womanizers because of all the fame and the riches that they have. And it seems to me that they're actually pretty monogamous. Yes. So, yeah, I'm sure they went through their phases when I was not there. And, you know, but I was there a lot. It seems like they got it out of their system. It did. It's like, like they're like going to be 50 and single and a womanizer. Right. And they could be. Yeah, but they could be. They have women probably throwing, all right. I don't want to make anybody mad. But, but, but, um, and so do they're females because they're also beautiful, you know, people.

It's going to be some pretty grandkids. Yes. Well, I have a very beautiful granddaughter, S. May. Yes, she's so darn cute. I can't. I, I'm starting to shake because I haven't seen her since Christmas. I'm like, uh, um, but between the Olympics and the book and traveling around. and it's just been really hard. But having said that, they are. They want a wife, children, and a family. And that makes me so happy because they witnessed what can happen if a marriage doesn't work out. And I'm not saying everybody's is going to be perfect. Who knows what's going to happen. But they really, really want that deep down in their heart. That's so interesting. Michael has been off-air having an opinion on that. I think.

think maybe... What's my opinion? Just you have talked about how, I don't know how to say this the right way. You, you respect monogamy. So here's, so here's the thing. Like I, and there's a lot of these things going viral lately where it's like, there's a, there's a lot of single men without children that reach older age, giving a lot of advice to young people like self-optimization and sleep habits and financial literacy. And it's kind of like, you know, when all you have to think about is you, like, to be honest, it's not that hard. It's not. If all I had to do each day was wake up and like put a couple coins in the bank and take care of my body and sleep good and maybe go on a day or two, like it sounds like a pretty easy life. I think a harder thing that I respect as I get

older and build my own family and businesses. It's a much harder thing and I think much more rewarding to build a family, build a life, take care of, you know, like raise children. And so listen, to each their own, but I think like I respect when I see people that have had a lot of success kind of get their priorities right. Right. And it's like for your sons, yep, I'm sure they could go and make a few extra dollars and they could get a few extra eyeballs. But I think a harder thing is to stay disciplined, settle down, build a family, build a life.

And like in statement augum, it's like I do. Right, right. They're disciplined. They're resilient and they work harder than everyone else in the room. And that's like an easy statement to say, but they really, really, really do. They are always, always working. And I think on the monogamy end, it's probably not been easy, but that's what they want. They want that strong relationship.

But I'd love to say, and I hope that that has come from me. because I am not the, you know, TMI. Like, I was not, I'm monogamous, two people my whole life. Oh, you heard it here first. My body count is pretty low. And I really think. I'm sure your sons are happy, but that's the headline. The headline, Pam's body counts low.

Listen, boys, two body calmed or mom, that's pretty good. Yeah, your sons are like, yes. One was dad, one was new, that's pretty good. They do know this. And I think I know they like that. I do. I know. I've heard them like talk about like, yeah, that girl, oh, she's that it's too much.

It's too much. I can't do it. So I know that that's important. Logan didn't tell you to ask me that. No, he did not. Towns and bond, my body count is not one. Sorry to break it to you, Michael's my not only my body count. Yeah, but it's under 10, right?

Yeah. That's pretty good. It's still pretty good. I caught her early. You don't catch me. She was the numbers were going to start. Like, I don't know, the numbers were starting to creep up. No, no, I was never.

Listen, I like, fuck who you. you want I was never slutty ever. There you go. I wasn't on a slutty. There you have it. I kind of wish I was a slutty. I kind of wonder what I missed. Why not my slut face?

Yeah, I missed the slut face. Yeah. I was a little slutty for a period, but. Good. Get it out. Get it out to your system. No, but I guess what, you know, I think, I think to your, like, it's, it's just,

I guess like to round it out, it's, as I, as I grow and as I look to examples, and of the examples I want my sons to look to, as I want them to look to different men that potentially could have it all, but choose to be disciplined and choose to be honorable and choose to to kind of live in a way that I think is...

Not gluttonous. Yeah, because again, like, I think it's a much easier thing to just kind of... Slide into bitches' DMs and get their decked. But I think sometimes... It's really easy to do that, right? I can say that in front of Logan and Jake's mom. Yes, you can say anything in front of me.

me. They tell me everything. There's a lot of, um, there's a lot of men right now. I think taking advantage of young men, giving them messages that I think will lead the majority of those young men astray, right? Like a lot of the people kind of preaching, make all this fast money and be with all these women. I was like, the majority of men, that's just not going to happen for. Right. And one day you're going to look around and you're say, wait a minute, I'm 40, 50 years old and I haven't settled down and I don't have a family and I like have wasted a lot of my life away. Right. And what, and you're by yourself. I can't even imagine being alone. Like, I don't understand that at all.

Like, good or bad, try to make something work. I mean, work towards it and having relationships. That's what life's all about. Yeah, not to mention, as again, as you get older, like, there's so many, it's so hard to just build a business, build a family, raise good kids. If every day you're with a different person, like that kind of stress just seems.

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Definitely check out the Felicia Ballet Flat. I like the black, like I said, the Allie Ballet Flat is really elegant too. Visit them at samedelman.com to explore everything you need for spring and get 15% off with Code Skinny 15. That's sameddleman.com, Code Skinny 15. How has your son's discipline rubbed off on you as their mother? Wow, that's the first question or time I've ever been asked that question. You know, when I, it has helped me write my book because it was in vlog when I started vlogging. Jake is like, Mom, I think you'd be really funny. You should try it. I'm like, wow, I need to bust out of my, like, you know, playing tennis and, I don't know, cleaning the house.

And I need to do something grander. And so I did, and that helped me to develop something new that I would never, step out of your comfort zone, take a risk. And that's how the book came about, too. Like, yeah, anyone could say, yeah, I should write a book. This is a great story. But to actually buckle down and do it, it took discipline. And I watched them, and they amaze me.

I mean, they really do. Sometimes I just sit back and I listen to them, like on a podcast or at a business meeting talking at colleges. And I am like, wow, I'm so impressed. And it's not, I don't feel like it has anything to do with me. I was just seriously blessed with kids who have learned and taken it all in and processed it, processed it and made it into something. So I'm taking more risks. I don't know if that answered your question, but I'm stepping outside of my comfort zone. I've always been pretty disciplined.

I mean, I'm a nurse. I went through schooling and, you know, stayed on track and wasn't a slut. And, you know, I'm pretty disciplined. So I have that and it runs in our family, I guess, but seeing them take risks. So why not do it myself? My dad better answer that question the same. My dad and my stepmom. What are the disciplines that you've seen from a micro level through them?

Meaning, like, are they waking up at a certain time? Like, what are the little things that you see for our audience that are tangible, that you can't believe they do? Well, I think some of it is still the manifestation process. I love this. I know you're a big manifest. I researched you. Let's talk about that. A big manifester.

My dad taught me. I taught them. They've taken it to new heights and new levels. levels and I think it's, you know, Jake gets up in the morning. This one example when he's in Puerto Rico and he's, you know, honed in, right? Camp for fighting or whatnot, whatever he's doing. But he goes outside, he looks up to the sky, stands real tall and erect. He looks up into the sun. He gets his vitamin D. He starts doing some of his breath work and then goes through that ritual of mindfulness, which I definitely have much harder time being the meditating, you know,

and doing that type of thing, sitting in red light therapy and his hyperbaric chamber. And that takes a lot of discipline and calmness in the breathwork. Because Jake has an anxiety issue. He has a lot of anxiety, which I can see why their lives they lead, you know. And Logan is a little more carefree, I think, like right when he gets. it's up, but they do, and that has changed since having a baby. Obviously, you're getting up a lot earlier. But it's spending time with his family and kind of, that's just so wonderful to see. But Logan is constantly working, which actually can be annoying when you're with him, is on his

phone taking care of this and that and this and that and these and those and doing this and that. But he also can multitask, which amazes me. I don't know how he does it. It's, I don't know if it's good thing, and he does it all well. So those are like two things. I hopefully answered your question. Yeah, you did. They kind of are like, wow, that's pretty impressive and pretty incredible. What would Nina and Yuta, is that how you pronounce her name?

Yuta. Yuta. Yes. Is that right? Yes. Okay. How would they describe you as a mother-in-law? Fantastic.

I'm lovely. I could see that. Your energy is really good. Oh, thanks. they feel that way. I'm sure there's times and they've been mad at me about something who isn't going to be,

but I think I'm very blessed with my kids are mama's boys, and I think the girls recognize that, and they like that. Play that clip for my daughter-in-law. There you go. Because how your boys treat

their mom, how they're going to treat you, is really important. If I would have looked at that before I married Greg, we might have had a different story. Not that I'm glad this didn't happen because it did. But if your sons treat their moms well, their mom well,

hopefully that the girls that they choose are going to like that and not be jealous of it. And I don't insert myself. If I'm asked, I will. But I am not that mom that's nagging over the boys and trying to, to get their attention away from the women. I am like supportive of those relationships. And I think the girls appreciate that. That's a great question.

I'd love to ask them. Switching lanes of it. You mentioned earlier that a lot of kids these days, they don't aspire to be engineers or pilots or fire. They aspire to be creators. Yep. What is something after experiencing fame as a family for your children that you would caution people against?

Maybe, you know, we glamorize. that kind of attention, but some things that you guys have had to navigate as a family as the platforms have grown. Well, it's definitely not all glamorous. There are so many wonderful sides to it, but there's also so many pitfalls and dangers out there. And I think I would prioritize, like I said before, and I'm going to say it again because it's really important, is the mental health aspect. Are you able to be consistent, to be disciplined, to be, to be resilient. And you as parents or anyone else's parents who have kids that are talking like they want to do this,

I think it's up to the parents to look at that child and say, yeah, they have what it takes or, you know, what they don't. And if they don't have what it takes, you have to be very strategic in how you steer them away like into something else. And I can't think of an example maybe right now, but all right, you might not want to go on camera and start talking because people are going to make fun of your pimples or your funny hair or whatever. Well, maybe you say, you know, but you like music? Let's try music as an outlet type thing and give them different options because mental health and faith, I think, are really, really key and especially

in today's world. So I would also ask them if they think they could see themselves doing it, any kind of thing, whether it's gaming or, you know, having a podcast. Can you see yourself doing that forever? Yeah, well, your sons have reached a level that it's not possible to turn it off now, right? Correct. And we talk about this all the time. There's different levels where, you know, maybe you get a little bit of attention, but it's not so much where if you, like, decided, hey, this isn't for me, you could step back.

But if you go too far with it, not in a bad way, but like if you reach the level, your sons of like there's no turning back so then the rest of your life if you're out you're being scrutinized people are taking pictures people are coming up to you people are commenting on your family on your on your marriages on your children there's no way around it right and so I think about that a lot because for children especially that maybe look to a platform like that and say hey that's for me like it comes with a cost and to your point there's a lot of great things but it's a cautionary tale for sure and I think you just made me think of something as as parents Point that out. Take someone like Jake or like Logan or I don't know what other good examples there are.

The Kardashians. I was going to say that, but I left it to you guys. But it's true. Look at all the scrutiny that they all get. Like we've been compared to that family in a different level. Like we're not the wealthy Kardashians. You guys are doing all right. We're doing all right. But it's look at that. Like show them the example and go, just remember. You know, think about this as you get older. Is this what you want? Your privacy is gone. It's out the window. And Greg and I have kind of decided to embrace that rather than hide from it. A lot of parents of kids that are in the spotlight, no matter if it's an actor or musician, that you don't see them out there on social media.

They're in hiding. We're more outgoing and we've decided to kind of embrace it. And I think part of that was the HBO show. We didn't really have choice. We kind of had to go along with it. And I don't mean we were forced. We were like, and we embraced it. We said, okay, they're already going to put, we're already out there.

Let's just put it all out there. Let's be real transparent and show people that not everything is hunky-dory. Because it's not. I think we live in a time now where fortunately the person has a bit more control, meaning like we talked to a lot of celebrities that maybe came up in the 80s and 90s on this show or before. And they were really at the mercy of a lot of publications and tabloids and they didn't really have a mouthpiece to answer. Now I think a lot of people can't. Like you can get on your own podcast or the answer.

But so there's that. But, but yeah, I look at a lot of some of those people to your point. And I'm like, man, that's a lot. Can't go out anywhere without just. It's debilitating. Logan, like, I feel like deals with it a little bit differently. I don't think, you know, they have security. Right? Jake can't go anywhere

Like anywhere They do love Puerto Rico for that though a bit Because it is a little bit more toned down And people are a little calmer And where they live Like a lot of people have a lot of things And so they don't look at Jake and Logan is But then they still kind of do

But they don't bug them about it And they don't come up to them and constantly You know, want to take pictures and this and that Another thing about Jake and Logan Is though they truly adore their fans And they will always stop if they can and embrace the fans and take pictures. They're never, like some of those celebrities you see or I've seen professional athletes,

just be awful to people. You know, like, they're so much better. They don't come across as so much better than their fans. Who was Shia LaBuff just attacking the other day? Mike Piazza? Do you see that? There was a clip of him when he, because Shia LaBuff just did this show. Okay.

And said Mike Pia, he would go out to the stadium for like 90, 90 different times trying to get Mike Piazza's up. autograph. It wouldn't give it to me. It was going on it. Yeah. No, and I know and same like to on our platform like people that we meet like that. That's kind of the reason you want to do is you want to connect with people. But I think you reach a certain point in security and all. You have people that are maybe bad actors that are coming for the wrong reasons. It's scary. It is a little bit scary. And you know, it hasn't happened. Knock on wood too little here and there. But most people who are yelling F the pulse. If they actually see them in person, they're like,

hey, can I get a pick? Hey, you know. Or if you answer them back, yeah, that's right. You know, and then they just laugh and they're in person, they're fans. Haters are actually really kind of fans in disguise in a way. Fine line. Yeah. It's a very fine line. Starbucks baristas know their communities.

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validated early warning signals for systematic inflammation, even small elevations matter. Glucose, which we've talked about on the show, and insulin because blood sugar, dysregulation, and inflammation fuel each other in a cycle most people never break. And vitamin D because low levels are consistently linked to higher inflammatory activity throughout the entire body, and that's why I use function. tracks 160 plus lab tests every year so I can actually see my inflammation markers, my metabolic health, and dozens of other systems. And it doesn't just guess at them. If something is trending in the wrong direction, I want to know before it becomes a real problem. That's what owning your health

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Eden Rock St. Bart's times the Skinny Confidential. This collaboration has been years in the making. I have been going to Eden Rock properties for a very long time and I fell in love with the way that they thought about branding. Every single detail, they don't miss anything. It's such an experience. And when I thought about what brand I wanted to collaborate with, Eden Rock immediately came to mind. So we went down to St. Barts and we sat with their team and we conceptualized what this collaboration would look like. And so it's here. After a year and a half, it is live. The Eden Rock, St. Barts, Times Skinny Confidential red ice roller. It's in their signature red.

It has a gorgeous, like, look at this. Ah, silver roller. It's so beautiful. It's very summer, you know? I could see this in an ice bucket while you're on the beach, enjoying some rosé or a margarita. Goes right in the ice. And then we also launched mouth tape.

So it's red, too. So you're going to get those red lips, very summer-esque. And again, it's in the Eden Rock, St. Barts branding. And then we launched facial towels. Everything is limited edition. It's very exclusive. Once it's gone, it's gone. And these facial towels are plastic-free. They don't have any formaldehyde in them. And they're so adorable to throw in your beach bag. I use them to wipe my kids' hands. I use them after an oil cleanse. This collection is so major. I'm so excited about it. And it's so fun to see the Skinny Confidential come to life in red. You can shop our collaboration at the link in the show notes or on shopskinnyconfidential.com. And if you're you're at the Eden Rock St. Barts property. You can also shop at the Eden Rock St. Bart's Boutique and the spa. Eden Rock, St. Barts, wherever you are. Where is your relationship with your ex Greg now today? Great. I can call him right now and say, and he hasn't said a word about the

book, nothing about any of the backlash out there over it. He hasn't said a word. I don't know if he's just trying to ignore it. Greg, let's get a selfie with you with the book. Yeah. Let's do that. Well, I've wanted to, but I didn't know. I actually was going to give him a sign copy, but Logan's like, I don't know if that's a right time to do that. And I'm like, but I should. It's about him too. So despite all the past, we can still come together, recent couple of incidents. We've come together and we've been on the phone, an hour, hour and a half. Are we doing Thanksgiving together? Yes, we've done Thanksgiving together. I mean, I think Paul American kind of, that's why. Soften it. But we are.

is Nina, to her credit, was like, look, you have one grandkid, and if you both want to come to Christmas, both come to Christmas. I'm not doing Christmas over here and Christmas over there. It's about our grandkid, and I'm all for that. I think Greg has a little bit more trouble with that, but he's learning and he's settling down, he's getting older, and I think he's realizing that he's going to have to cooperate if he wants to be cohesive.

And I've always wanted that. My parents had a very nasty divorce, but at the end, we did all Christmases and birthdays together, and their spouses liked each other, and everybody ended up being friends. And I think that's really important, and I do believe that we are very still much a family. I still consider Greg a family. I don't know what he does, but I promote that. So hopefully that just resonates and keeps resonating with them. We do still want the same thing for the boys.

You have two children together. And we still worry about them the same way. Before you go, you have to tell us why you crossed off Paul. That was Logan's idea. She crossed off Paul on the book. That was definitely Logan's idea because it's funny. Yeah. It's comical.

And just the whole, like, the whole thing is so creative and eye-catching that, you know, if you walked past a book and it was that on the shelf versus, don't read the comments, which was what I was going to name it. You know, what are you going to do? You're going to look at that and pick it up and see what it's about. You know how I'm going to make you pose with me and Michael, right, after this? With giving the finger. The exact same thing.

Oh, the exact same way. I love that. Yeah. Let's see which one I have to be. I have to be, I think I have to be Jake because of my good side. She wants to pick a side. Okay. That's good.

Yeah. After writing the book, what do you hope the people, the main takeaways are for the book? What do you hope people get out of it? I think I like the fact. I'll go back to my toolboxes about manifestation, about faith, about listening to your kids, not letting your fear get in the way, realizing that success isn't final and failure isn't fatal. That's just so important.

And I think taking care of yourself as individuals, as parents, is really, really important. Like, I know you guys are into fitness and take, you know, the supplements and skin care. I love that. I mean, I'm so into that. Like, and I play tennis and do Pilates. And I want, I didn't put that as much in the book. However, if I do a sequel, it's going to definitely come back up.

But I want people to take care of themselves. And I want them to really our generation of kids, yours and coming up, they need a lot of attention. You would think not because of the little box that everyone's, they do. They need a lot of attention. And if you don't give it to them, guess where they're going to turn? I've heard a parent say this the other day that when your kids become teenagers, they'll like shut the door on your face. And you go to their room and you try to connect with them and they'll shut the door on your face.

And what the parent says, well, you have to keep coming back. Even though they shut the door, shut the door, shut the door, shut the door, you have to keep coming back. And that kind of gets through to them. Absolutely. And I, again, my kids never did that with me. They were never disrespectful. I will take the door off the wall. That is what their dad would do.

They will not have a door if they do that. You can't let them do that. That's just disrespectful and you take the door off. That's perfect. You'll take the door off. Take the door off. I don't love that aesthetic though, but it would be temporary because they're going to learn. And you can even make deals with them.

Maybe a curtain. I'll let you shut the door while you're getting dressed. I'll let you, but you're not going to get on your phone or the internet behind closed doors. You know, what are you sneaking around in there? Like, my kids weren't, I laughed at your podcast. We're talking about the food in the bed. Oh, yeah. Do you do food in the bed?

No. Why? My kids weren't even allowed to bring a glass of water upstairs. Butter toast every night in the bed. With crunchy salts. I'm wiping the bed. I laughed so hard. I love to eat in the bed.

There's actually, what is a better pleasure than sitting in bed with a trash? We had a friend. Eating with your magazine and your show. See, I don't like that. We had a friend of ours. I stand up to eat at the time. Same. I think it's actually.

Back for your digestion. I think it's good for you. Yeah, I think it's good for you. Yeah. We had a friend the other day, I won't say, who they sent us a picture of their bedroom. And it's two big beds next to each other. So they're still co-sleeping. Same room.

Co-sleeping. They can jump from bed to bed. Yeah. And they have their own set of sheets and blankets. It sounds like fun. Maybe if you want to do that, then you can have your own crummy bed and I'll have the clean one. Right. find it. Just make sure it's a Halston mattress. I want the, I want the best

mattress. Cremdala Crem. Don't put some shitty mattress next to it. Well, we'll figure it out. Yeah. So I could be a solution because I don't, I can't stand those. Where can everyone find you, Pam, to say hi, pimp yourself out. Where's your book available? I myself out. So currently it's on Amazon.com. I also have a website F-the-Palls.com. And it will also, it's my like landing page for the book and it will take you to Amazon. There's audio, which I don't promote it. I mean, a lot of people gravitate towards audio. I didn't realize this.

Yeah. Because I'm one of those people that picks up the book in the airport or the bookstore. I still love it. But it's on audio. It's on e-book. And currently in Amazon, we'll see if I do bookstores. I don't know. Congratulations on your book, on your sons, on your granddaughter, on everything.

You must feel so fulfilled. I am very fulfilled. I'm very blessed. I'm very fortunate, full of gratitude, attitude with gratitude. and positivity, and I'll stress that at the end of this is, we all have to remain positive because we are in a crazy world. Well, thank you for making the trip. We've got to thank Lucas Mack for setting this up.

Thank you, Lucas. Lucas, you've got to come on yourself too.