The Bossticks - Priyanka Chopra Jonas Keeps Moving Forward With Confidence, Empathy, & A Sense Of Humor And So Can You With These Tools

Episode Date: February 11, 2021

#330: On today's episode we are joined by Priyanka Chopra Jonas. Priyanka is an Indian actress, singer, film producer and now author! Today Priyanka joins us to discuss what motivates her to continue to succeed and how you can apply those same tactics to your own life. We also discuss moving forward, bullying, secrets to marriage, life skills, confidence, empathy and why it's so important to try and understand different perspectives before going on the attack. To connect with Priyanka Chopra Jonas click HERE To check out Priyanka's new book click HERE To connect with Lauryn Evarts click HERE To connect with Michael Bosstick click HERE Read More on The Skinny Confidential HERE For Detailed Show Notes visit TSCPODCAST.COM To Call the Him & Her Hotline call: 1-833-SKINNYS (754-6697) This episode is brought to you by Three Ships Beauty In case you aren't familiar, Three Ships is an all-natural, vegan skincare brand on a mission to make clean beauty accessible for all women by providing 100% plant-derived, certified cruelty-free skincare products all under $40 snd Three Ships is giving TSC listeners 20% off their first order on www.threeshipsbeauty.com with promo code SKINNY20 The episode is brought to you by AncestryHealth  Your inherited health risks don't have to stay unknown. Learn if you're at lower or higher risk for some commonly inherited conditions linked to breast cancer, colon cancer & heart disease, with AncestryHealth. Find out what your DNA says about genetic risk with AncestryHealth®. Head to Ancestry.com/SKINNY to get your AncestryHealth® kit today! This episode is brought to you by Just Thrive During a time when boosting our immune health needs to be at the forefront of our minds Just Thrive has the answer for you. The Just Thrive probiotic can help boost your immune system and heal your gut. 80-90% of Americans suffer from gut issues and these issues can track to many of the diseases that humans face. With Just Thrive probiotics we can help combat these gut issues. Use promo code SKINNY at www.justthrivehealth.com/skinny to try today!  Produced by Dear Media

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Get ready for some major realness. Welcome to the skinny confidential, him and... From being a 17-year-old teenager to suddenly thinking about self-confidence and being able to be the best version of myself when I walked into a room. How do I present myself? How am I speaking with people? It kind of really gave me the confidence that I have within not just my physical self, but how I interacted with people. And we're back again. Back again with another episode. I haven't done that in a long time. You're back with a new haircut.

I'm back with a new haircut. I chopped that ugly mop off my head, and I'm back in business with the slick back. Guys, that clip was from our guests of the show today, Priyanka Trooper Jonas. And on today's episode, we're doing a deep dive into the world of bullying, activism, talking about beauty pageants, really covering a lot of ground here with Priyanka. And for those you that knew the show, my name is Michael Bostic. I'm an entrepreneur and brand builder. Most recently, the CEO of the Dear Media Podcast Network.

And to my right, my co-host, my wife. My pride and joy. Your pride and joy. My everything. Okay, here's what I've decided I'm going to do. I told you this this morning, but I just want to nail it into your forehead to make sure you're remembering. Since it's the month of Valentine's Day, I've decided as one of my Valentine's Day gifts, call it a stocking stuffer for Valentine's, if you will. I want to compliment every single day the second you wake up.

I just tried to pack a few in there because honestly, like, I'm going to be honest with this. I thought that if I did that because we're getting close to Valentine's Day, I was going to get lucky and maybe get some extra sexual favor. No, what I want you to do is every morning upon waking up, give me one compliment every single day for the full 28 or is it 29 days. Okay, I can commit to that, but I want also maybe some documentation of what I get for doing that. I know that like a lot of people are to chime and you should just do that anyway because you're a good husband. But no, I, you know, this is a sensitive time. I want to make sure that like if I'm putting in that effort, we're getting on Valentine's Day, I want to be rewarded accordingly. I reward you accordingly in many different ways.

I want it documented. I want it here. I want it out there. You know, everybody has these super husbands that want to get in. and, you know, these Instagram couples and they're taking pictures in the park, kissing and doing this. Like, I want something at the end of the road. I want, like, you know, the rainbow that goes to the leprechauns gold. I want, like, I want to know that this effort is going to be rewarded. Because if not, like, what the fuck are we all doing? You know what I mean?

Like, you know, come on. If you're in a relationship, all you have to do is just put your phone down in the bathroom while you guys are changing together and just turn up my voice. Ready? This is a note to all significant others. It is February 11th. Make sure you have booked the dates that you need to. to book for Valentine's Day, bought the things that you need to buy, got the candy, got the

chocolates, got the flowers, get all your bases covered. Don't forget. I'm here to remind everyone in a very, not very subliminal way that Valentine's Day is around the corner. Wait until you see what I did for you on Valentine's Day, Michael Bostic. I cannot wait to see what you're doing for me. I just cannot wait. Honestly, it's a pandemic, Lauren. We can't really do much. We must be honest. We better take it easy this year. Okay. Our very lovely guest, The lovely Priyanka Chopra Jonas. She's an Indian actress, singer, and film producer. And she is so accomplished.

It is wild, you guys. Her movie The White Tiger is number one on Netflix, I think right now, which is so wild. She was the winner of Miss World 2000 pageant, and she's also one of India's highest paid and most popular entertainers. She is killing it. Such an inspiration. With that, let's welcome Priyanka to the skinny confidential, him and her show. This is the skinny confidential, him and her. I heard that you just got off of an interview with Glennon Doyle.

And I would love for you to share with our audience a couple of things that you talked about with her. Well, she's amazing. And I'm such a big fan of her book. And, you know, I read it through quarantine while I was writing my own book. And I think she, her bold approach towards every story that she told and who, she is and her inner strength really came across in that book to me. I was, I was very moved and she's just such a wonderful person. She's such a light. When you talk to her, she's so invested in you. She's so joyous, just a beautiful human being. And no wonder she's the writer that she is.

And we talked a lot about, like, she'd read the book. So we were talking about things in the book that were hard for me and like really delving in deep. She's so wonderful. I had a great chat with her. What was one of the hardest parts of the book to write for you? First of all, all of it, because I'm not an author, and this is my first time doing it, and that's a daunting task in itself. But remembering everything, actually. When I decided to write about my book, I didn't understand what a daunting task I had just undertaken, because memories are weird.

You know, they kind of shift and they kind of change as you grow. And so I had to corroborate all my stories with people who were in my memories. and I started writing it with like milestones. And I was like, okay, what is my earliest memory to what happened after that, to what happened after that, and sort of built around it. And I kept it very reflective because that's how I was feeling at that point. I wrote this predominantly during quarantine. I think everyone was just feeling overwhelmed and everyone was at home not knowing

and, you know, being unstable and being on unstable ground sort of lend me to feel vulnerable. I had the space to allow myself to be it as well. So my writings sort of took that form and I delved in deeper than I thought I would actually. Speaking of being unstable, you know, in your childhood, you were sent away to a boarding school at a young age. What does that do to the psyche of a young kid and like how did you feel at the time having to make that move? Well, I was sent away in third grade to a city called Lucknow in India, which was four hours from where my parents stayed. And it was because I was a brat. And I was, and, you know, I was a terrible brat at that point. I was like, my brother was born and I was like,

what is this thing? And, you know, he's getting all the attention. And also boarding schools at that time, especially with military families. And this is when I was, like I said, in third grade, it was a cool thing to send your kids to boarding school because they had a sense of stability, you know, with military families, you're moving around every two years. So it was something I knew that would happen. You just realize what it feels like when you're dropped there and you're suddenly like not with your parents and with all of these random kids who you've never met. I mean, in retrospect, it gave me a massive sense of independence at a very young age. It taught me to be self-reliant. But it wasn't easy at that point at such a young age. So do you look back on that memory as a good thing or do you

look at it as a challenging time or both? I think of it as a good thing because it was a challenge in the moment that I took it on that challenge and I thrived at the end of it. I didn't let the challenge take me on and that's a sense of pride I have associated with that memory instead of being bogged down by it.

That's really a way of it's my sort of philosophy in life is your past is almost like shackles on your feet when you're trying to move ahead. It's like wait. When you read a book, you always read the next page, right? You don't really you rarely go backwards. So

we employ the same philosophy in our lives where you kind of choose to just take one step forward. It doesn't have to be multiple. It's just like keep moving. I learned that at that time in my life, I think. That, you know, it's just like, let's not think about three months later. What are we going to do tomorrow? Let's just get through tomorrow. When did you know that, or maybe you didn't know, if you knew, if you were going to be

famous or an entrepreneur? Was that something that was innate in you? Or was that something that kind of happened out of nowhere? No, it was definitely not innate. I didn't even know I wanted to be in entertainment. I didn't know you could be in entertainment at that point. You know, I came from a very academic family. And, you know, you have the couple of choices.

You want to be a doctor. You want to be an engineer. You want to be a lawyer. And I knew I didn't want to be a doctor. I hate the sight of blood. And I had gone to too many night duties with my parents, which was like overnight and hung out with the nurses. And I just, I couldn't do it.

didn't have the lion's heart for it. I love numbers. I love physics. I wanted to be an engineer. I didn't even know what being an entrepreneur was till I joined the entertainment business. And I kind of, you know, started working in movies. And I was like, oh, this is a business. And this is what business means.

And you provide a service. And, you know, kind of everything in my career I've learned on the job. I've never had any previous training or aspirations to be in this job. I kind of was thrust into it. And I kept my head above water for a while till I learned how to swim. And then that's what I kept doing. As it pertains to Eastern and Western culture for children and how we're raised in both cultures, what do you think would be the positives of each and maybe some of the negatives of each?

If there is any, like, you know, because there's different values. There's different systems. There's different things that, you know, parents put importance on. Like when you think back to your childhood and you look at both cultures, what do you think the main differences are and what would you take from each? I think I'm a natural amalgamation of each. And it's really hard to compare cultures because we don't know enough about either of them to be able to say like, oh, this is good, this is bad. Every culture has its weirdness and it's good things and it's bad things.

And it's hard to sort of compare. But I think over the course of time, I've sort of become this global person because as a child who grew up in India and in America, I dealt with various things over there and various things over here, which. sort of lent to my personality becoming what it is today. I think I took the best from both. You know, I learned the best from both cultures and it's really hard to compare them. Do you want to get your gut bacteria in check for the new year? I know I do, which is why I invited Tina Anderson, the CEO of Just Thrive, onto our podcast. If you want to hear more about gut health and all the details. That's podcast episode 307. And we discussed all the things. So I found out that one of the biggest causes of bloat is actually in your gut bacteria. And Tina broke it down for us on

this episode, but basically you have tons of naturally occurring bacteria in your body. You have good ones. And this can impact everything in a positive way from your digestive system to your immune system, to your mood. But then you also have bad bacteria. And that's what you want to get rid of because the bad bacteria traps gas and solid waste in your intestine. So Tina broke that all down in that episode, like I said, but to fight bloat, she recommends Just Thrive Probiotic. Basically, this works quickly to get the bad bacteria under control, and it literally starves out the bad bacteria that causes those painful gases.

I've got Michael on this. She even said I can put a little bit of the probiotic powder on my finger and put it on Zaza's gum, because if we've learned one thing this past year, it's that gut support is truly the key to feeling your best. obviously we've vetted this brand just thrive products have more clinical research than anything else out there they're vegan non-gMO gluten-free dairy-free and free from anything artificial i feel like i should always mention that just to let you guys know how well we're vetting these products just thrive probiotic can even support easier weight management beautiful skin and better sleep so if you're looking for an easy way

to get rid of bloat improved digestion and support optimal immunity you need to try just thrive probiotic You are going to go to just thrivehealth.com slash skinny and you get to save a 15% site wide. You use promo code skinny. That's just thrive health.com slash skinny and use promo code skinny. Enjoy. I guess what I'm asking is like if there is the best, like what would those best, like if there's value system on, you know, that's in Western culture, what do you think that best is? And in Eastern, what do you think that best is in how you mesh them together?

Because maybe there's something that our listeners here that our Western culture could learn to be better in their own lives. I think the one thing that I would say I have really kept in my corner is just having a massive relationship with my parents and my extended family. And the family support system has been a large part of my upbringing. And my mom's sisters, I've lived with them, I've grown up with them. My cousins are a big part of my life. I was raised in a big family and married into a big family.

and I really see the merit of having that sort of support system, which I think could be really cool for the West to sort of adopt as much as possible. What I love about, I think, America is that it's a land of opportunity and it's a land of dreams. And, you know, as much as America itself is sort of lamenting and fighting through internal, destructive things like, you know, sort of issues around equality or issues around gender parity. But the whole world is dealing with all of that. But what I love is the fact that if you have a dream, you can make a roadmap for yourself and achieve it within this country. And that's something really beautiful. What advice would you give to someone that wants to write a book? Was there daily practices that

you took in your routine? For instance, do you have a strict morning routine that you would hear to? Do you have a nighttime routine? How did you implement writing into your day? You're so busy. Well, I definitely, it had to be when I was in the mood for writing. Because, again, I'm a first time author. I did not know how to do this. But I really wanted to. I've written op-eds. I always wanted to write a book.

I just didn't know how my co-author Nan really helped me sort of figure out how it was structure the book. But I used to do it mostly in the evenings or in the afternoon. Because this was around quarantine time, I would have finished working out, had my lunch, and then it was work time. and I would take about three or four hours out of my schedule to sort of just incubate, you know. It was like meditation to me. And because I'm a slow type or I can't type really fast, at least not as fast as I think, I sometimes tried to write. And even that was not as fast as I think.

So I started recording myself, you know. I started thinking about my memories and I would record excerpts and what I felt about them, then I transcribed them and, you know, build upon it a little by little. So that's how sort of the book came together. It really required building instead of just like putting it down on paper. Do you have our audiences obsessed with routines and rituals? Do you have any rituals in the morning that you do? Skin care, beauty, meditation, breathwork, food.

Give us the details if you have one. Well, I definitely like to wake up in the morning and, you know, give my skin a lot of moisture because, you know, you've been, it's been devoid. I have drier skin anyway. It's been devoid of that for however long you were sleeping, right? I love washing my face, keeping it super clean, getting a lot of moisture on it and going immediately and do a workout. I feel like all the inflammation and it wakes me up instantly and working out immediately

like after having a cup of coffee going into that. And then I have my breakfast after my workout. And that routine for me is very important to be able to work out first, eat after, after and then I get into whatever the rest of my day is. So we were talking earlier before the show, and I think to your point, you know, obviously America this last year has been in a pained position and there's been a lot of struggle. And with that, I think we're more connected than never.

And people have been, I feel very unkind to each other in 2020 and, you know, leading up this year. And rightfully, there's a lot of stuff going on. But in your own life, I know you've dealt with bullying. And I wanted to talk about how that affected you and your stance you've taken on it as well as how it's transgressed into online bullying. Because I think there's a lot of people now that use these channels and they like, you know, back in the day, you go to school and you get bullied, you come home and that was kind of the end of until the next day. But now like it follows you wherever you go.

We're so connected. And I wonder if you think about that ever and how you handle it now. I think I've also reached a place in my life where having dealt with it for almost 20 years that I've been a public person, it's more than half my life. I've kind of learned how to tune it out. because if you think about the kind of animosity that I could come across on my socials, I would drown in that if I even paid attention to it. And I just take away the power because, you know, I chose to be a public person, but I don't have to adhere to living according to somebody else's choices for me. I own my own life.

I own my own choices. And I don't need to explain them, first of all. Second of all, people hiding behind the anonymity of a computer and making comments on who you are and what you stand for, they're not going to be there to put food on your plate. They're not going to be there to wipe your tears. So why are we giving them so much credence? I just give credence to the people and the opinions of people who matter to me, my friends, my family, and that keeps me grounded. And I use social media for, I think, what it was meant to be, which is to be social. to reach out to people and be positive and create sort of positive energy. And I have to say,

though, during 2020, I did see a lot of that on social. I saw a lot of communities lifting each other out, saw a lot of people using social media for good, talking about things that needed attention, helping people out, helping neighbors out, creating a movement. And that was so beautiful to see as well. It made me really believe in humanity. Sometimes, though, with people of your platform, people feel like maybe you're unaffected and like you're inhuman in a way where they can say whatever they want and it's not going to have any effect. And I think that's not healthy either because people, like they throw these really hurtful comments out and they think it'll never be seen. But it's once in a while stuff like that's got to sting a little bit. I mean, I know it does for

us. At the end of the day, like we're humans just like everybody else. Of course it stings. And especially like when, you know, I've been a headline or a fashion meme or an Instagram post for such a long time in my life. That's how people consume me, right? You don't really know me as a person, and which is why I'm hoping that people who do know me will get to know me a little bit better as a human being with this book. But you have to choose your battles, you know, that's what I've had to do. Of course it stings. Of course I'm human. I'm just a girl who's, you know, chosen a life which happens to be extremely public. And I'm dinner table conversation every day. And so I had to at some point make, and I've written about this in the

book as well. I made peace with myself in saying that there are going to people who will, just because they don't see the human in you and they see the entertainment that they're consuming and you're behind this glitzy camera or whatever, that they're going to push to provoke me. They're going to push to say something that will, you know, affect my mental state of being because that gives them the power. So you have to sort of practice pushing them. that away and not giving it its credence and just taking away the power from that. And that's the only way to be able to deal with it. If you start seeing it for the vile comment that it is, then I feel like it could affect your sense of self and that's not healthy at all. What was it like when you started

dating a Jonas brother? Were the fans even gnarlier? I mean, was it like a whole different layer or was it actually positive? Or was it both? I don't know. I don't have time to think about the fans at that point, I was right in this wave. So I have no idea. All I know is, you know, I don't focus on, like I told you, whenever I'm reading comments and stuff, I just, I move past the bullshit, really. I just kind of take in a lot of the positivity. And I've seen that I have so much, you know, positivity and so much support when it comes to people on my socials that it's very easy for me and not look at the bad stuff. And I don't spend my life on it.

I have way too much time building my career, which is really hard to do to, you know, base my life on social and what people think about that. I love that answer. As you're dating someone who's also in the public eye and the paparazzi's are following you and you're trying to get to know someone, what is that like?

Is that challenging in itself? I mean, you barely, like when you first get together and you really don't know the person and there's all these people around you and paparazzi's, that seems like a lot of stress. So having been in the limelight for almost two decades, I'm really good at being able to hide away when I want to. You know, people won't see me. But, you know, when you don't care, you go for a movie, people take your pictures.

It doesn't matter because what is happening inside is important. You know, when I really want to get to know someone, I don't have to be in front of the paparazzi. It's only when I'm going out for dinner or if I'm like stepping out. out, which is a choice, knowing that, you know, you are going to be followed. It's a part of life. And, you know, unless I'm trying to hide something in the paparazzi arrives, and that's never the case, really. I just want to know selfishly what your number one secret to marriages. Communication, being able to have conversations for a long time without being able to think about

what you talked about. Like, if you spend 10 hours with somebody and by the end of it, you're like, wait, what did we talk about this whole time? That's amazing. I mean, that's really sexy. We've done like whether it's 350 of these and I wondered like do you even know? I'm just kidding. So you got a lot going on. You have the book. You have the hair care line coming out. What's next for you? Oh my gosh. That's a loaded question. The book's called unfinished because I feel like I want to do so much more. I've just about started working in America five years ago. And I feel like the body of work that I have in my Indian movies, the variety of roles that I've been able to do, the genres of films that I have been able to do. I would like to have that kind of body of work in global entertainment as well. As a producer, I want to be able to tell a lot of stories, female stories, South Asian stories in global entertainment, give them, you know, the ability to be seen in mainstream entertainment. I want to be able to push myself as an artist and as an entrepreneur. And this is my first founded product. I've invested in multiple. I want to be able to see what that direction

looks like as well. When you think about young people trying to break into the space and maybe follow in the footsteps that you've done, and I know like everybody's going to have a different path, what would you say the number one thing for those young people is and anyone that's trying to break out? Because it's obviously changed since you first started. Well, two things I would say, which I don't think will ever change. Is one, there's no do or die. So if one thing doesn't work out, you always have the ability to do something else.

Have faith in your ability to do what? whatever will work out for you, which works for your strength. So take the pressure off of yourself by saying, if it's not this, it'll be the end of the world. You have to take that pressure off your stuff because then you do the best work. Because you can focus on the art. The second thing is perseverance. Nothing speaks louder than the quality of your work.

So if you persevere to be the best at your job, to be able to deliver when you are brought to the table, to work on your craft, that will always sort of lead to and create opportunity for yourself, recognize opportunity, working on your craft, recognizing finding and creating opportunity for yourself combined with the lack of pressure, I feel like is a really good formula for getting ahead in whatever you want. Out of all the work and accomplishments you've done, is there one thing you can pinpoint

that you're so proud of? Being here at the other side of 35 and having people interested in my work when I was told for a very long time that, you know, when, you know, girls reach their 30s, you have to start thinking about what that means in the entertainment business. And, you know, here I am. It's just about starting in the entertainment business globally. I've just about done my first leading part here. I've just about done my first dramatic part here. And I'm looking forward to, you know, breaking that glass ceiling that people have built for it. female actors specifically, you know, even though the guys, even in their 50s, are still romantic, 20-year-olds. But with us, it's like, that's like an anomaly. It's like, whoa, did she do that? So, you know, that's what I'm most proud of. I don't think it's one thing. I think it's the sum of them all that I've had a journey, which was tumultuous, not easy, self-made, my blood, sweat, and tears. And I'm kind of proud of the fact that I'm here. I would really like to talk about the self-made part. I think that is so cool. And it is rare. I mean, you are self-made. Can you talk about some

struggles that you had to go through while this was going on to get where you are? Well, not knowing what you're doing at all. I was 17 when I was thrown into pageant world. I'd never thought of pageants. Who threw you into the pageant world? And how did that even come about? Because I read it's unexpected. And how do you end up just, you know, all of a sudden a beauty queen? Well, I had to give credit to my brother. My book starts with that, but I can tell you the story. He was 10 years old. I had just moved back to Boreli in India from Newton, Massachusetts, and I was 16, and there were two rooms in my parents' house. One was theirs, and one was my brothers. So he was kicked out of his room because I was 16. Naturally, I didn't argue, but he was really pissed off of not having his own room. My mom made,

you know, the hallway between the two rooms. She made that into his room, and she put a bed there, and she put like a chest there. And she was like, you have your own room. He did not fall for it. So we used to watch the Miss India pageant a lot. Every year we used to watch it on TV. I don't even know how a 10-year-old thinks of this. But he saw this magazine and saw the ad for the Miss India pageant.

I had just taken some mall shots, you know, soft focus, your hand on your face. And they happened to be at home. And I don't know what his mind was thinking. He asked my mom a series of questions. Is she old enough? Is she tall, whatever, whatever, you should send her into this pageant? And my mom was like, why? It's like, it'll be great for her.

She'll go to Mumbai, basically get out of his room. And I was really overwhelmed when I went back from America to study in high school in India because unfortunately, American high schools don't prepare you for the education system around the world. So I was so far behind when I went back into 11th grade that my exams were don't. daunting, you know, in 12th grade at that point. And I was sure I'd fail. So my mom sent in these pictures. Nobody didn't even think about telling me. We get this call. They asked me to join, come for semifinals in New Delhi. And that's when my mom tells me. And I was like, yeah, we should just do it because they were at the same time as my exams. So I just went to skip my

exam. Sid just sent my pictures in so I would get out of his room. The year, universe sort of conspired. And at 17, I won this pageant. And because I was Miss India, I was sent for Miss World to represent India for that year. And at 18, I won that. And that's how this whole thing started. So my 10-year-old brother is basically to blame. What's going through your mind when all of this happens? Because it seems up to that point, you were living a pretty normal life. And then all of a sudden, you're put on this massive stage in all, you know, the rest of history. But what goes through your mind when that happens? I always liked stage.

I was always the one who would be in all the competitions. I was always the one who was pushed to sing or dance or like being the limelight because I liked it and I wasn't afraid of it. I was always confident and the most crucial part I was very competitive. So when you put me into that spot, I didn't think anything of it till I saw the girls and then we had like a 20 day prep before the page. you know, you're trained and you have these events. And in that duration, I think the competitive bug just bit me. And I was like, okay, let's just take a second. It could have been any competition.

I had to just do my best. I've been competitive like that all my life. I've always strived for excellence from school. So this was just one of those things. I just never thought I would be able to excel in beauty as a space or, you know, pageants. I just treated it like a game in a way and just, did my best. Ancestry health.

Okay. So when I got pregnant, I had this need, this crazy need to want to know more about my family story. And Michael felt the same way. We wanted to trace our family genetics back to sort of like a family tree situation. So in comes ancestry DNA. The ancestry DNA test tells you where your ancestors are from. And ancestry's billions of records and millions of family trees like.

you discover their personal stories, which is so cool. It was really easy to do and sign up. So what they did is they sent us these little vials. You spit in them. You put them back in the envelope that they send them in. And you send it back. And then boom, a few weeks later, you get all your results. I really like it because not only did it break down and tell me kind of what I already knew, but it told me much more, told us where our families originally were from, where they migrated from, our backgrounds. It gives you some genetic testing so you can see if there's any family history or issues that you need to look for. This is extremely beneficial for people, well, for anybody, but especially for people that are thinking about starting families.

You kind of get to know what you and your partner have and what's in your background. So you can be aware of it. And when you're aware of things like this, you can also be proactive and say, okay, like, this is something I need to keep on my radar for myself, for my child's health, for my spouse. It's just an all-around great product. And they make it super simple to use and really easy to read results that are very interactive online. And it doesn't just tell you which countries you're from. You know, I've talked on this show that I have some Japanese blood in me and some Italian.

my mom was, you know, half Japanese, half Italian, and that revealed itself. But I also found out that I'm from Scottish descent, Irish. It showed me areas in America that my family had immigrated to and then moved from. So it's just really interesting to learn a little bit more about my family history that I had no idea about. We even had one listener find a famous relative, which is so crazy. You could also find a photo of your great grandma as a little girl. It's so wild, you guys. And like Michael said, it's so easy. You just spit in a tube and send it off. start exploring your family story today. Head to our URL at ancestry.com slash skinny to get your ancestry DNA kit and start your

free trial. That's ancestry.com slash skinny. Is the pageant system the same? Is it the same in India as it is in America? Because I know it's a lot of pressure here. We've talked to some people that it's like crazy, crazy pressure. Is it the same? It's also a lot of crazy pressure on physical beauty in America.

which it isn't, in my pageants at least, with Miss India and Miss World, there was a lot of attention put on, it was called beauty with a purpose. So to be able to have a sense of purpose, to be able to have a sense of self, speak to heads of states, have auctions and charities and travel around the world,

and to be able to have the confidence enough to walk into a room at 18 and engage in a conversation, that was very encouraged in my part. pageants. And from what I've seen, the American pageants have a lot more credence than what your body looks like and, you know, the physicality of yourself. So that's the difference that I've seen. Yeah. And I think a lot of, especially for young people that enter pageants, there's a lot of pressure from the parents here. And it might not be a healthy pressure because it's, like you said,

it's very material. It's not about, it's who you are. It's about kind of like what you look like. And hopefully that starts to change a little bit. I mean, that, like, I come from the world of pageants. and people ask me this question all the time is like, you know, you're a feminist, but you're beauty queen. And I was like, you're right. And I understand both sides of it. No, women are not cattle. We shouldn't be rated on our physical beauty. But I know that my pageant gave me such a sense of self because I was catapulted from being a 17 year old teenager to suddenly thinking about having a self-confidence and being able to be the best version of myself when I walked into a room. How do I present myself? How am I speaking with people? It kind of really gave me the confidence

that I have within not just my physical self, but how I interacted with people, because that was really pushed and inculcated in me and the other contestants. Also, because I didn't come from, I guess, a pageant family, like we didn't, I didn't, I never had that pressure. I could have been going for a relay race and my parents would have just been just as excited. I could have been like, you know, any kind of playing a game and my parents would have just been excited. If I competed in anything, my dad was my biggest champion, you know, he'd be like, yeah, let's get it. What do you think some really important life skills are to have? Like, what are your top three? Well, one is the most important is confidence. Also knowing that you don't always have to have it, you know, then it's

starts becoming put on, which is not what it should be. Confidence just should be in your backpack. You know, you should hang out there. You should be like, all right, I don't need you right now. I'm watching a movie. But when you need it, you've honed it enough that you can walk into a room and switch it on. You're not born with confidence. It's something that you work on your whole life. But it's a great skill to have if you can hone a sense of self. Second, I think empathy is very important to understand why, you know, people do what they do and not judge people for it, you know, from our own skewed upbringing, because we can't possibly know what someone's thinking or what their opinion is or what their side of it is. So we shouldn't try to, you know,

claim to know what is right and wrong. There is no right or wrong. Everything is a perspective. So I think having empathy and being non-judgmental is really important to put yourself in someone else's shoes and say, all right, why is this person being this way? It lends to peace rather than altercations and I'm a humanitarian. So I believe in leaning towards people rather than away from people. And the third thing, I think, is having conviction in your choices, in who you are. Because at the end of life, we're all a sum of our choices. So if you have conviction in whatever you've said to your partner, what you've said to the words that are coming out of your mouth, the choices that you're making because everything impacts multiple things.

And to be able to stand by it with integrity, I think, is important. Those are three big ones. I think those are three amazing ones. Humor, too. Sorry, humor is really important. Be silly. Yeah, I think a lot of people have lost the ability to laugh lately. Yeah, because everyone gets offended by the littlest things.

Oh, you're telling us. And there's got to be a sense of humor. And there's got to be a sense of, you know, right and wrong, of course. and I understand towing the line, especially with what you guys do. But, you know, people got to lighten up a little bit. Yeah, I mean, we're careful navigate. What we always try to tell people is like at the end of the day, like what we're not trying to do with the show is just bring on a bunch of people

that agree with everything that we think, right? Like, we try to bring on all sorts of different perspectives and backgrounds to understand, like you said, why they think the way they do. And maybe that helps us inform or change the way we think, right? You know, the more information you know and the more understanding you have of people, I think the better human you can be. But touching on empathy, how do you get to a place where you can kind of set aside like your initial reaction to try to correct someone and tell them, you know, like kind of push our beliefs and really listen to them? I think that that's such an important

tool to have, but such a hard one to hone. Such a great question. And I'm so glad you asked that because I see so many people when someone says something, you know, they snap back and they're just like, oh, no, no, you didn't just do that, you know? Instead of like just taking a second and being like, okay, why is this person saying it? Are they coming from a malicious place or not? I think that's the first thing to sort of recognize. And we as human beings have that radar within ourselves. When we sort of, sorry, Diana has an opinion.

It's okay. Hi, Diana. Diana, chill out. We have a little chihuahua and I'm surprised he hasn't made an appearance yet. Diana's sick of everyone being offended in 2020 and 21. I think I instead of, and I get a lot of ignorant comments because, you know, people just don't know. Instead of choosing to get offended, I choose to educate. When you make the first mistake, the first time you educate.

The second time you remind the third time is when you get offended. So I kind of have taught myself a sense of patience, especially because, you know, I travel all around the world. I don't expect everyone to know about me, just like I wouldn't expect everyone to know about, you know, my country if they ever came into it. So I'm learning everyone is a traveler in life and everyone is in flux. We're never going to know everything.

So you just have to come at it from a place of patience. It'll make the world so much more peaceful and not so violent and not so angry if we just take a second to see the goodness in people for the first time instead of just, you know, assuming that it comes from a bad, face. Well, I think also, you know, speaking of the platform you've built and even to this platform, like, I think sometimes if you're in any kind of public form or public conversation, people expect you to have the answer immediately and know the, you know, the exact right answer. And for us,

what we always try to tell people is like, hey, hold on, we got to take some time to digest and understand what's going on. We don't like to just jump into a conversation and take sides without understanding where both perspectives are coming from. And I think that's a pressure that's put on people that are in the public forum or any kind of forum that says, you need to have an answer and be on a side immediately. And I don't think that's how human beings work, or at least not how we work. We try to really kind of figure out what's going on

before we interject ourselves. And also to pick aside really quick, like have an opinion on something, say something, have a dialogue publicly. But this is something my mom used to say, when I was young, live and let live, live our life to the best of our abilities, and let people live their lives instead of trying to.

to change instead of trying to move. Yes, there are some things which desperately need to change, of course, and there are some things we need to, as a generation, sort of, you know, fight behind, come together so we can make a change. And that's really important too, but the coming together is what is really crucial. You know, we're sort of building a world,

which is so polarized right now, and it's so divided, and it's so divided in such small, small ways, that we're sort of losing sight of the bigger picture, which is, you know, we're all the same species on one planet. Like, we've just divided ourselves so far down that, you know, we're going to get lost in that, I feel. I have never been to your country, but I'm dying to go. And I would love to know some of the beautiful things you love about it.

From food to culture, just tell us, explain it to someone who's never been. India is not a place to go for a vacation. India is a place to go for an experience. India will, you know, touch all your senses, your sensory senses, you know, what you see, what you smell, what you hear, you experience. You can spend your whole life in India and you'll still never get to know her because she's so diverse. And every state that you go to, you have a different written and spoken language, so a different alphabet almost, different clothes, different features, different food. every state. I love that about India. I love that India is peaceful. It's welcoming and it's given the world so much all this time. It's given the world, you know, the zero. It's given the world yoga. It's given the

world meditation. It's given the world Kamasutra. So many amazing things. But more than anything, it just stands for a country that's just always given. And that's what you experience when you're there. India is extremely giving as a nation, and that's one of my favorite things about it. Might need to tap India a little bit more for that meditation for the rest of the world. One of the biggest things on this platform is beauty and wellness. So I would love for you to talk about some of the products you use or just skincare, makeup, anything fun. There's a lot of women listening, and I know that they would love your tips. I personally would like to know what you do for your eyebrows.

Oh, oh my gosh, girl, 20 years ago when I won my pageants, you should have seen my eye They were like those 90s eyebrows, like almost negligible, nothing at all. It's taken many years to build them back to that. Because I have thicker hair and darker hair, I have the ability to build them, but I like to not make them too thin and I like to wear them naturally. So I brush them up and I kind of keep them a little bit busier on the front, but on the side is where I shape them to take form of my face and my cheekbones. My skin care is very important to me, as is my hair care, because my job is in media, so I always have hair and makeup and glam.

And if the foundation isn't right, which is like great skin and great hair, you can't really build on it to be amazing. Hydration is a huge part of my skin care. Having vitamins is a very big part of all wellness in general, whatever vitamins work for you, of course. It's really important to find the right cleanser for the pH in your skin. So it doesn't dry you too much or it doesn't, you know, it's not too oily. Amazing moisturizer, SBF. Like, I'm not very complicated with my skincare. And I have drier skin and I'm in London right now and it's winter and it's cold.

I love coconut oil at night on my skin. It hydrates, it moisturizes, it smells amazing, or almond oil. I love doing a hair mask at least twice a week. whenever you have the ability to have a longer shower. Sometimes before I do a hair mask, I'll do an oil massage for my scalp, leave it on for about an hour, go about your business,

and then when you go into the shower, shampoo, hair mask, and then come out, and your hair will feel just so taken care of. I really keep it simple because that's all the time we have in real life to do, and that's all you really need. You don't need, I'm not someone who believes that you need thousands of products for every, every single part of your skin. I'm not a believer in that. I think you need to find a few things

that work for your skin and sort of make sure you rotate and change every couple of months, though. Why did you decide to do hair care? You're launching that. Can you speak on that yet? I always wanted to found a beauty brand somehow, but I wanted it to have a couple of things I was very specific about. I feel like the beauty and fashion business creates a lot of waste in the world, You know, and we as a generation have inherited an earth which is in dire need for us to be sustainable. So this brand is all the checks in my boxes. When it comes to hair care, it's clean, vegan, vegan, cruelty free, doesn't have any bad things for you like paraben, sulfates, none of it. The packaging is made of 100% recycled trash from landfills and oceans.

It's the thinnest plastic wall you'll find on the aisle. And we spent so little on packaging that we had the ability to have really superior product. Our cap is for three cents. We spent three cents on each cap. So we had so much money left to be able to have really superior product. And what was really annoying to me as a teenager, I had long hair down to my waist. And I'd go to Target, Walmart, wherever, you know, you buy your beauty products. And all the good stuff for hair was so expensive.

So it was really important for me for this to be super affordable. So it's very affordable, good for the planet, and has superior product because we didn't spend so much on being flashy. And it's called anomaly because, you know, it's not normal. And it's an anomaly because there's not much like this in the market out there. We're thinking about the world and having great hair shouldn't cost us the earth or a hole in your wallet. I can't wait to try it. And it smells amazing. What does it smell like? Can you tell us what it smells like? It's unisex. So it smells sort of clean and fresh, you know. It's a citrusy sort of, it's just, it's very anomaly and specific to this brand. There is nothing that my husband loves more than a scalp massage. Nothing. When you said that, he flinched. He loves a scalp massage.

Now that I know that it's unisex, might have to. Yeah. I would love for you to tell a story in your, your book. Like maybe one of your favorite stories, it could be very short, small story just to get everyone excited about reading it. Wow, there's a few in there, which I probably never have spoken about and never will speak about. But one story I'll tell you, which is sort of, you know, give you an essence of what my book speaks of. I give a lot of, you know, credit to my parents for me having the confidence that I have as a woman in, you know, crazy world and an insane industry. because they raised me as my own person. They never shamed me.

They never, you know, laughed at my opinions from when I was a kid. And I'll give you an example of that. One of the military postings, and we lived in these military homes, which had nameplates outside so you could tell who was living there. So my dad's name, Dr. Ashok Chopra, my mom's name, Dr. Madhu Chopra, who was on that nameplate. And I remember looking at him and I was like, wait a minute, don't I live in this house? Why is my name not on there?

And my dad, this is me in kindergarten. Okay. My dad was like, you're right. You're absolutely right. Your name should be on there. If your name is on there, what would you, what would it read? So I thought about it for a second. And I said, Priyanka Mimi Chopra, Upper Kindergarten.

So the nameplate was changed and it had my parents' names with their degrees like MD, MBBS, whatever. And it was mine, Priyanka Mimi Chopra, Upper KG. And that's such a, I end my book with that story because, it really, I was never, they didn't laugh at me. A lot of parents would not take that seriously when I was in kindergarten, but my parents gave me a sense of, no, you're right. You know, you're right in having an opinion. You're right in knowing your rights. And that is such an amazing quality that I sort of, you know, imbibed from them. And that's an example of some, a book and a story in my book. It sounds like you're very entrepreneurial from a young age.

That's an entrepreneurial thing to say. I was like, what is my brand? Before you go, can you leave our audience besides your book with a book, a podcast, or a resource that you consume that brings you a lot of value? Oh my gosh. I read, of course, Glennon's book Untamed last year, which I really loved. But I love reading fiction, which moves me. And there's this book I read last year called Homegoing.

It's Yagiazzi's book. It's about two sisters in Gai. in a couple of centuries ago and how both their lives sort of go in different trajectories like sliding doors almost. One is married off to, you know, a slave trader and the other one is turned into a slave. And what happens in their multi-generational life,

which leads the story to, you know, America, today America. It's such a beautiful book about family, about women, about, you know, the history of the countries that I couldn't put it down. I just, I love the book. I'm going to Amazon it after this. You love it. I can't wait. Pimp yourself out. Tell us where we can find you when your product's going to be available. Tell us about your book. Give us all the details before you go. Products called Anomily and it's going to be available in Target and Target.com exclusively right now from next week. Super exciting. And my book is going to be wherever you can buy books. You'll be

able to find it. Hopefully, it's called Unfinished. It comes out February 9th, which is really exciting. And if that's not enough of me, you guys can go on to Netflix and catch my new movie called The White Tiger, which is out now. And it's number one in the world. Congratulations. Thank you so much. That's amazing. That is amazing. That is inspiring. And I just want to tell all you guys, her book is so beautiful. I have it with me right now. It's stunning. I will put it on my Instagram story. Priyanka, thank you so much for taking the time. just give us your Instagram handle and we appreciate you coming on. I'm at Priyanka Chopra and thank you so much for having me, guys.

Who wants to win some cheeky pink, skinny confidential pop sockets. They're so fun for your phone. I'm telling you I even put one on Michael's phone. They're cute, they're pink, they're cheeky. All you have to do is tell us who you want to hear next on the skinny confidential, him and her show by commenting on my Instagram at the skinny confidential. And of course, as always, make sure you rate and review the podcast. on iTunes, it helps us grow the community and the show.