The Bossticks - Sara Foster & Erin Foster - How To Bet On Yourself & Manage Your Emotions
Episode Date: May 27, 2024#705: Today we're sitting down with sibling duo, Erin & Sara Foster. Erin and Sara Foster are well known for their presence in the entertainment world as comedians and writers, in addition to their in...vestments and involvement with companies including Bumble and Mirror. They join us today for a conversation on their thoughts on privilege, their careers, working your way up, and balancing parenthood and your career. To connect with Erin Foster click HERE To connect with Sara Foster click HERE To connect with Lauryn Bosstick click HERE To connect with Michael Bosstick click HERE Read More on The Skinny Confidential HERE To Watch the Show click HERE For Detailed Show Notes visit TSCPODCAST.COM To Call the Him & Her Hotline call: 1-833-SKINNYS (754-6697) This episode is brought to you by The Skinny Confidential This episode is brought to you by AG1 If you want to take ownership of your health, it starts with AG1. Go to drinkAG1.com/SKINNY to get a free 1-year supply of Vitamin D3K2 AND 5 free AG1 Travel Packs with your first purchase. This episode is brought to you by Vegamour Give your hair the power of the little pink bottle. Visit vegamour.com/SKINNY and use code SKINNY at checkout to receive 20% off your first order. This episode is brought to you by Cymbiotika Cymbiotika is a health supplement company, designing sophisticated organic formulations that are scientifically proven to increase vitality and longevity by filling nutritional gaps that result from our modern day diet. Receive up to 15% off your purchase at cymbiotika.com/SKINNY This episode is brought to you by Jaspr Visit jaspr.co and use code SKINNY for 10% off your first purchase. This episode is brought to you by Primally Pure If you're tired of discomfort during your menstrual cycle, try the Cycle Soothing Spray from Primally Pure at primallypure.com/SKINNY and use code SKINNY for 15% off your order. This episode is brought to you by Nike Find your feel with Nike Bras & Leggings that deliver supportive flexibility and comfort for whatever your day brings. Shop now at nike.com/women Produced by Dear Media
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The following podcast is a Dear Media production.
She's a lifestyle blogger extraordinaire.
Fantastic.
And he's a serial entrepreneur.
A very smart cookie.
And now Lauren Everts and Michael Bostic are bringing you along for the ride.
Get ready for some major realness.
Welcome to the skinny confidential, him and her.
When you grow up around a successful parent, you are exposed to successful people.
You're exposed to people who have pulled themselves out of poverty and become a billionaire.
There are lessons to be learned there.
You're sitting at a brunch or a dinner with people who have phenomenal advice to be able to give you or like contest you and push you.
You can get jobs obviously because of who your parents are, but I would say writing is one of the few things where it doesn't matter who you know or what you have.
You either have a riveting script that takes you on a really incredible ride or you don't.
Hello everybody. Welcome back to the skinny confidential him and her show. Today we're sitting down with a dynamic duo, a sibling duo that is Aaron and Sarah Foster. Aaron and Sarah Foster are well known for their presence in the entertainment world as comedians and writers. In addition to their investments and involvement with companies including Bumble and Mir. They also have a VC fund that they started. They join us today for a wide spanning conversation about being mindful about finding your partner, finding somebody you're sure about how to bet on yourself, balancing parenthood and career. There's a ton of takeaways. We had a ton of fun with them on the show. I'm surprised it took.
took us this long to do it. With that, Aaron and Sarah Foster, welcome with the skinny
confidential, him and her show. This is the skinny confidential, him and her. I just was thinking
how I know about you. And sorry, Michael. You don't even know the story. You look at an ex-boyfriend.
I was hooking up in Cabo with someone who rhymes with Schmody Runner. Oh my God.
And his pickup line to me, you're going to die. His pickup line.
my sister's on the cover of Maxim.
Stop.
Guys, am I 900 that I don't know who we're talking about?
Sarah, come on.
Say it more time, Shnody Schnner?
Sarah, I'm going to let you get here on your own.
I'm not even going to walk you to there.
He said, my sister is on the...
Oh, in my mind, I'm thinking someone she dated.
So I'm going to...
Oh, okay, got it. Can I say who?
Yeah, Brody?
So his pickup line to me was my sister's on the cover of Maxim.
That's quite a pickup line.
If he only knew how famous his other sisters were going to be.
Seriously.
That would have been a way bigger.
He had no idea how big he could have gone.
He had no idea how big he could.
I mean, he had to slum it with me.
By the way, that worked.
You said you were hooking up.
We'll talk off here.
Okay.
This is a lot.
Now we're dating ourselves because it was before all that.
No, this is before him, way before him.
But that was the pickup point.
We've been together since we met at 12.
Okay, so this would have been 2003.
You were there in Cabo.
I was there separately on a, but we were all like,
of down there. But I wasn't, we weren't
We're in high school together.
We went to middle school, high school.
No way.
But you were on the cover of Maxim.
Do you remember what I'm talking about, obviously?
She remembers being on the cover of Maxim.
Of course.
That was a big deal.
So really, you guys.
It was a big fucking deal.
I kind of think with this episode, you should post the cover on your
Instagram.
This gives you a reason to be like, look, I was on the cover of Maxx and remember.
They remember they're making me post it.
I already used my daughter as an excuse to post it like two years ago.
Oh, what did you said?
I would have done that. I was like, oh, V, I was just, like, cleaning out the garage. This is crazy. Look what I found. And she was like, ew, disgusting is what she said. You look so hot. If I remember correctly, there was, like, leather and black. But I thought it was white lace. Oh. I remember requesting the photographer who shot, like, all the Victoria's Secret. They gave me, like, an option. They're like, who do you want? I go, I want him thinking that if I had him, I would look like Heidi Klum or whatever, whoever the models were then. This guy, Russell James.
the pictures were fine.
I mean, they were fine.
No, they were great.
They could have been better.
They were gorgeous.
And so when he said that, I went to like the 7-Eleven in Cavo or whatever, and I, like, wanted to see the sister.
I like, so I got the magazine.
I bought the magazine.
I remember looking through it and being like, oh, my God, his sister's so hot.
How is the sister?
And then now he has all kinds of sisters.
Yeah.
All kinds of sisters.
He has.
He has all kinds of sisters.
He does that are on way bigger covers than.
But, like, cute.
I love that.
The maximum was the jam back then.
Got the guys revved up.
I really, yeah.
No, you were on the cover at the peak of Maxim.
Like, whoever's, if it's still a magazine, whoever's on the cover now, we don't know.
It was the peak.
Oh, yeah.
If Instagram had it been around when I was on the cover of Maxim, I mean, the sky would have been the limit for me.
Yeah.
But this was really just at a time when you actually, you know.
Here you are.
On a podcast.
Yeah.
First question I have to ask is who was funnier when you guys were little.
That's me for sure.
Sarah discovered how funny she is as an adult, wouldn't you say?
Yeah. I mean, I think you were considered like the funny kid. And then I think the first time that I really realized like, oh, I am funny is with barely famous, which I was really, which was a comedy that we wrote, starred in, scripted comedy, poking fun at reality stars and the desperation to be famous and all those things.
But I had to push Sarah to be like, you're funny, you should embrace it, lean into that side of you because that's actually like the cool side.
The hot side, of course, it's cool to be hot, but it's temporary. You got to like.
like you're also really funny.
It's temporary hot. I know.
That's kind of hard. You have to be multifaceted.
Got to have more.
It's got to be more. I'd take funny over pretty.
Yeah.
I feel like guys would too.
If you've really dissect it.
And I know a lot of guys who are dating really hot girls and they are trying to get out
of the relationship.
That just isn't enough. And I think as women, we grew up thinking, oh, if you can just
be pretty, if you can have a great body or great this or that,
then I'll get the guy or the guy didn't want me because of how I look.
And it actually is not ever that.
It can help you get the guy, maybe not keep the guy.
100%.
I feel like you have a really interesting perspective.
I think, like, yeah, you don't want to go to a staring contest every night, right?
Like, there's got to be something to say.
That's a Frank Sinatra quote.
Yeah, it is.
Don't you know the Cindy Crawford story?
No.
It's like the fakes.
Aaron's heard it before, so she doesn't want to hear it.
But it's like, it's like, okay, so it's not actually Cindy Crawford.
but a guy is on a deserted island with Cindy Crawford.
And he's like, holy shit.
Like, I'm on a deserted island with Cindy Crawford.
This is every man's dream.
So they hook up.
And they're done hooking up.
And he's like not feeling satisfied.
He's like, God, like, that's not what I thought it would be.
This feels terrible.
Like, he's like, okay, what can I do to feel better?
He's like, okay.
And he puts his hat on her and, like, draws a mustache on her and puts his clothes on her.
And he's like, now I want you to walk all the way down to the end.
to the beach and then start walking towards me. And she's like, okay. And she starts walking towards
him. And he's like, yo, bro, I just fucked Cindy Crawford. And it's like this thing.
Again, this isn't actually Cindy Crawford. But she's the... And now it felt good for him.
And then he was like, oh, that's the thing that was missing. It's like, it feels good to tell your
bros or to tell, oh, I'm dating this person. Or when you actually peel back the layers, like,
is it meaningful? Is it actually who you want to be with? Do you even like this person? It's so
true. They just want to brag in the locker
room. It's true. And I think that
the people who are envious of another
relationship, like a friend's relationship, it's not
oh, my friend who has like the hottest girlfriend
or the hottest wife. It's like the one who
actually likes his wife, wants to hang
with his girlfriend. They laugh.
They're not, he's not trying to escape her. He's not cheating on her every time
she leaves town. I think it's like the guy who's actually happy,
right? Yeah, no. Like when my guy friends come to me now
and ask about, like they, it's exactly what
you're saying. Like they want
the connection and they want the relationship.
They all run around and do their thing.
They're a bunch of animals.
But I think like when they get alone with their thoughts,
some of them, they're sad if they don't have the connection.
They want that thing.
Those are all the,
those are the relationships I'm envious of.
Never the one with like the hottest husband or the richest husband.
It's always like the one where it's a mutually respectful relationship
where they're laughing, a lot of respect, a lot of joy.
Those are the relationships.
I'm always like, God, they have it all.
Yeah.
A lot of my friends are in dark days, too.
Like, they're out there.
Like, it's not as glamorous for them as they portray it to be.
Like, I know what goes on behind those.
I mean, imagine waking up every day and there's a new stranger and it's like, you know,
you're sitting.
I don't have the capacity.
What were you going to say?
Oh, I was going to say, I have a theory that, you know, there's a lot of, like, supermodels
and, like, famous actresses who end up getting cheated on with someone who's not nearly
as beautiful or successful.
And I think that there's, because men are such visual people, you know, like women, we can
be attracted to a guy for so many different reasons. But men are very visual at first. It's very much
like, women don't say like, oh, I like brannettes or I like guys with big butts. It's like we don't
think like that. We just think it's like a vibe. I think that sometimes women who are considered like a fantasy,
it's so hard when for their partner when she's normal and she has like bad breath in the morning or she
like has like dandruff or she says something embarrassing at a dinner party and, you know, like falls off
the pedestal, I think it's a much further fall for the guy to watch.
That is really aware and so true. You both grew up around so many famous people in such a
wild town. When you look back on the way you grew up from this perspective now, is it like
weird or is it just normal? Aaron and I have discovered that we had different childhoods.
Really different experiences in our home and with our family and like in our world. They don't match up.
No. And we've realized that they've realized that they're different childhoods.
the oldest gets treated differently. So her experience and her journey is different. And Aaron was the
middle child. And so for me, I grew up. I went to a different school. My best friend was Kate Hudson.
So for me, I'm like, well, that's famous. Famous is her parents. You know, I'd go to her house and
like, holy shit, this person's in the kitchen and that person's in the kitchen. And so I always felt
like my friends were growing up in this very fantasy world and we had like a normal life. That was my
delusion at the time. And then for Aaron, she was at a different school.
I was a public school. And I was the rich kid. I was the kid who had like the biggest house and
the fanciest life. And so I always thought, oh my God, we have so much. Like we're so
less and like everyone else around us doesn't have what I have. Like I was the friend who
who had more than everybody else. And she was a friend who had less than everybody else. So it kind of
like set us up in a weird way.
Great. Why did you guys go to different schools? Do you want to go to Goldie Hans? I was not invited. No.
Sarah didn't really acknowledge me until I was like 25.
Oh.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I think it was errant.
That's not true.
It was like 22.
What's going on there?
Oh, God.
Oh, Lord.
No, we just didn't connect until later in life, guys.
I mean, I was trying to connect our whole life.
I was desperate to be Sarah's friend.
She just, she really wasn't interested.
You guys seem so sympathico, though.
No, we are.
It's.
Yeah, but it's not a no, we are.
I mean, that is true.
What happened?
But we are as adults now.
I mean, it's a different relation.
Do you have siblings?
I have siblings.
Did your relationship switch as adults
from children or no?
We got to do a whole other
That's how I feel about
What? Do you think it's unique
to have that?
I think they have a bigger gap.
They're five years.
But I also have three siblings.
It's different with each sibling.
And you know what I've realized
is the birth order is a real thing.
Now that I have kids too,
it's just different.
The oldest one gets so much attention
when they're a baby.
It's also a totally different thing
when your parents go through a divorce, right,
when you're young.
So it's a very different...
We've unpacked this on our podcast.
I don't know if we want to bore your listeners.
We could.
Please.
We could.
But we've realized through therapy
and through so much conversation
and so much communication...
There's a lot of responsibility
that falls on the oldest through a breakup.
But I think Erin has now a lot more grace
for what I was going through,
and I obviously have grace for what she was going.
going through, but it takes time to get there. You want to just point fingers and go, God damn,
why weren't you a better sister? Why weren't you this? Why weren't you that? And then when you
sort of step out of it and you hold space for the other person's experience, also, you can,
heal from that. Yeah. I also think, like, when looking back when you're little, you're just,
like, surviving, especially if you come from divorce, you have any kind of trauma or whatever it is.
Like, you're just doing the best you can. I really believe that people are doing the best,
can, especially when they're little.
How old were you when your parents split up?
I was five.
I was three.
Oh, that's young.
Yeah.
But it's so true what you're saying because I think about as an adult when I would hold
resentment towards Sarah for what was going on when we were children.
And it's like I'm holding her responsible as a seven-year-old for me having not been there
for me through what we were going through in our household.
She's seven.
But for me, I'm five at the time thinking like, where the fuck's my older sister, like walking
me through this?
But she's a child too.
Yeah.
So I think it's important as adults to kind of have those conversations, have the arguments, the tears, and get to a place where it's not really getting me any closer to healing by blaming her or it's not getting her closer to healing by, you know, blaming me or whatever and just kind of moving forward.
But it's also as you get older and you have your own kids, then you start also seeing your parents' journey and blaming them last because then you start going, wait a minute, look at what they were doing.
But this is the this is sort of how this is the roadmap, right? This is always how it works.
You get to, you hate your parents, you're resentful, you blame them for everything, and then you
become to realize, wait, they, they didn't have it easy growing up. They are imperfect people,
and then you forgive your parents. And it's all about forgiveness on all ends of the spectrum.
I think that if you can actively on a daily basis, imagine your children at, or your, excuse me,
your parents as three-year-olds, five-year-olds, seven-year-olds, and really put yourself in their shoes,
it does, like you said, really help let go of resentment.
I just read that somewhere. That's so interesting. Look at your parents as a toddler.
I think about it. There's like this weird meditation that I do when I lock Michael out of the bathroom and pretend like I'm on my period every day because I need some space.
But this meditation, it's like the whole meditation is like imagine your parents as children like being three. And it's really helpful. It's like it makes you feel lighter because you understand.
You know what I mean?
Totally.
So how did you guys sort of come back together?
Like what was the who came to who?
How did it happen?
Well, there was no like, I mean, there was no like, we were never a strange.
It wasn't really like that.
I was just living my life, trying to stay above water, trying to figure out where I was going.
I didn't go to college.
I moved to Paris to model.
I was really just on this path, right?
I was like, I need to be independent.
I need to make a living.
I just had blinders on.
You're totally the oldest.
It's like drive, drive.
And there was no part of me that was like, fuck my sister.
It was more just like, this is my path.
And so there was never, we weren't like a strange.
We just, as then as in our early 20s, I started being more like, oh, come with me to this thing.
Like, it felt like there's a very big difference between like 16 and 14 or 17 and 50.
You know what I mean?
But then in your early 20s, it's kind of like, oh, like the gap gets smaller.
And so it started being like, oh, Aaron, come with me to this.
or, you know, let me introduce you to this person or let's have a fun birthday.
You know, just shifted.
Modeling in Paris.
What's that like?
I mean, it was horrible.
What do you mean?
I lived in, like, a dorm with, like, 80 ladies.
And I mean, ladies, like kids.
And you're just, you go on like a thousand castings a day.
And, you know, if you get a call back, it's like a celebration.
You know, I was, I'm like just under five, nine.
So this was the time in, like, 2000 when if you were not.
5-9 or taller, you had no chance. Like, there was Kate Moss, and that was it. She was like an anomaly.
But if you were not right at 5-9 with the ruler, I'm saying if you weren't like a supermodel,
if you were just a regular model, they wouldn't even look at you or see you. Now it's like,
anyone can be a model. But it was very strict. So I was already like going through, oh, no,
you won't be seen for this because you're 5-8 and 3-4ths.
How did you deal with all that rejection? That's a lot of rejection. I think it builds like,
It builds resilience.
Oh, yeah.
No.
I mean, from modeling to acting and hosting and all those things, it's rejection every day.
I mean, it's really horrible.
And what were you doing why she's in Paris modeling?
Who knows?
Who knows?
I don't know.
But it's also a different time.
You weren't allowed to treat.
I don't even know when that was.
What age was that?
You were maybe writing for Daily Candy?
I don't know.
I don't know.
I'm starting a writing career.
But so crazy is how people were treated.
You know, you were allowed to treat people like shit.
You were allowed like.
Give me an example.
Oh my God. I remember being on set for a catalog, like a big company. And the photographer and all the people are like literally saying loud where I can hear them. They're like, oh my God, look at her. I mean, her teeth are. No, this is not working. Like this is not working. We need someone else. We need to see. Like they would just, there was no consideration. If you were not at the top tier, it was just terrible. It's horrible for a girl's self-confidence. I think it's interesting what Bella Hadid just said, how she said like modeling.
I don't know how she said it, but it's like not filling her cup up anymore.
And like she needed to be, she wanted to feel more fulfilled.
Like she felt like it was draining her.
That career of modeling, it seems like so much work that people don't see.
And then you have people thinking it's easy, which is like a mind fuck.
And that is a much easier time.
Her generation of, it's like you have Instagram, you have all these things.
It's a much, it's a very different time to try to be a model.
And what was your writing career?
Writing is also a very, very interesting.
There's a lot of rejection there too.
Complex career.
It's different kind.
I mean, it's less, you have more control in a lot of ways.
You can't control, I mean, today you can control how you look a little bit more than you could 15, 20 years ago.
But like, there was no Botox.
There was no Botox.
But like, you know, you're being judged for something different, something that you can work on and get better at.
And so I don't think it has the same surface.
level where it's the same kind of rejection where it can kind of set you back with emotionally the
same way but I just I don't know I always wanted to be a writer and I didn't really know how to figure out
how to do it and so I started working with Daily Candy was like my first ever being paid to write do you remember
what Daily candy was why does that sound so familiar it was this thing that well how long have you guys been
in L.A. We don't live here we live in Austin. We live in Austin full time but we came in 2014 in L.
in L. Like San Diego area right so 2014 yeah I think that it exists right it was honestly
like a city guide with like comedy like with humor a sense of humor it was like city guide where was it on though
it was just on the internet and i was like daily candy dot com you get you get a newsletter you get like an email newsletter
okay that sounds familiar well they paid me 50 dollars every time i wrote a thing that made it in it was not like
something you're making a living off of but it felt like this accomplishment that it was being like
printed somewhere you know and it was like a step in a direction it felt like a big deal at the time
i know which is so funny and then i was writing for um hello giggles if you remember hello
Eagles. And then I started writing in TV. And it was just like a real slow progression, like getting the
lowest level job and like working my way up. And I don't know. It just kind of evolved in a really
cool way. When did something hit? Like when you see momentum? The Ryan Murphy Show. No. I wouldn't
say that. Really? Getting hired to write on a Ryan Murphy show? That's pretty fucking cool.
I mean, I had a party when you got that job. I know you're like, oh, not that old thing.
I take a lot of pride in being a writer on the only show of his that never succeeded.
or made it past one season, so I picked the wrong show.
But that was very cool for me because it was just, I don't know, I just felt like I was in the game.
Like I hadn't gone to college.
I would, you know, I was insecure as a writer.
And it felt really validating to have a real job.
And I'd never made that much money before.
And it just felt, I felt like so, I did feel like I had made it.
But then after that.
You used to call me every day driving out of the Paramount lot.
You'd be like, I still, I'm, I just want you to know.
I'm like, I can't even believe.
I get to, I have a drive on on the Paramount.
It felt really cool.
How did you guys keep it together here in the city growing up the way you grew up?
I mean, I just asked that curiously because we have two kids.
I don't know if I can.
We have to credit our parents.
Listen, I think our parents really instilled we had just the right amount of fear.
You know what I mean?
We were just the right amount afraid of them.
Also, our mom was very anti-Hollywood.
She was not interested in us having famous friends or becoming friends with our friends' parents
because of a certain thing.
She was very anti-that world.
And so she kind of always forced us to stay grounded because she's very grounded.
And our dad who was in that world, he still had very high expectations for who we were going to be as people.
So he wasn't interested in raising spoiled brats.
He was very much like, I grew up poor.
I worked really hard to make money.
If you would like to be rich, like I'm rich, then you should go make your own money.
And there was always like a step involved in anything that he gave us, right?
Like, okay, I'll help you get a car, but here's your part in it.
or I'll help you get your first apartment, but here's what you have to do in return.
It wasn't like everything is handed over.
So we always still carried like a weight of responsibility and guilt around anything that we were given.
And it just kind of pushed us to be as independent as we could as early as we could.
Well, we're also told very early on, there's no like trust fund.
You know, you see a lot of these LA kids who, you know, I'm not judging, but who are raised with wealthy parents.
And they know they're coming into money, right?
And there's something about knowing you're coming.
into money that I can't see where any kind of drive or ambition can come from.
So we were told very early on, just so you are aware, you are not coming into anything.
That doesn't, that's not going to happen here.
And I'm so grateful for that.
No, I, you know, I grew up with some privilege and I think sometimes, like the internet eats people
for this, but I actually think sometimes people that grow up with the parents that are very
accomplished and have set up, there, that can also be very challenging for the, for those kids,
I always, you know, because it's such a high bar to live up to.
And the pressure to live up to that is different than someone's like, hey, you know,
maybe more humble beginnings.
You just need to get out there and make it.
I'm just saying it's a different experience.
Again, if someone's listening.
No, that's valid too.
I mean, we still, no matter what we accomplish, you know, we can still find a headline that
it refers to us as David Foster's daughters.
And he'll have nothing to do with the accomplishment that we've created for ourselves
on like a TV show or, you know, you can't get a TV writing job because your dad is
David Foster. Like there's no connection there, but to a lot of people, it's easier for me than
it is for someone who just moved here from Ohio. And that might be true. You still have to prove
yourself, though. And I think it's taken us a long time to shake off the like resentment about that
because there's there's a lot of, there's a disadvantage to it, like you're saying. But there's
also advantages you can't ignore. Like when you grow up around a successful parent, you are exposed
to successful people. You're exposed to people who have pulled themselves out of like
poverty and become a billionaire. There are lessons to be learned there. You're sitting at a brunch
or a dinner with people who have like phenomenal advice to be able to give you or like contest you and
push you or that is privilege. Give you an opportunity as an intern or something. I mean, it happens.
And like, you know, everyone takes advantage of those opportunities and it gives you a huge step up.
It doesn't give you your career because who's going to give someone a job, you know.
Well, people do. People do. You can get jobs obviously because of who your parents are. But I would
say writing is one of the few things where it doesn't matter who you know or what you have.
You either have a riveting script that takes you on a really incredible ride or you don't.
Yeah.
Yeah, no, and I guess, you know, we've had people with that who have very accomplished,
well-known parents on this show.
And I, in a weird way, like, nobody's going to shed any tears with them, right?
Yeah.
And we wouldn't want them to.
Like, we don't, you can't deny the privilege, you can't deny the, Aaron always talks about inroads.
You can't, it's really, I think, embarrassed.
saying when people are like act oblivious to their privilege. Like we sit here going where we are so
grateful and very aware of our privilege. I guess what I'm saying though is it's like it could be a lot
of pressure to live up to that kind of bar. Yeah. Because it's just a really high bar. I think if we were
in the music business, right? I think if we wanted to go into the music business, if we wanted to be
singers, if we went that's a different that that would yeah. I think that would be different. There's a law
and 40 laws of power. There's a law and 48 laws of power. I don't know what that is. Robert Green,
my favorite writer, 48 laws of power.
And he says that
I think the law is never
try to live up to a great man's shoes.
I never fall in a great man's footsteps.
But it's not just for what we're talking.
It could be anything.
Like if you have a mentor that is a great politician
or you have a mom that is this or that.
And you try to do that.
You're always compared to that.
And unless you surpass that,
which is very hard,
you're better to just go to some completely different career path.
Someone who has done it pretty well,
which is very, very,
rare is like Clint Eastwood's son.
Like Scott Eastwood, he's kind of carved out of an impressive movie friend.
I actually didn't realize he's his son.
I thought he was like a nephew or something.
Because he went by a different name for a very long time.
Before he got anything.
It's going to be very hard to surpass that.
So it's almost like choosing a different career is more strategic.
Because you're always going to feel like you're falling short.
That is pressure.
100%.
We're really lucky because we have no musical talent.
So there was no question if we were going to be.
I also think that there's...
Because we just didn't have it.
But I even mean like for kids who like take all like the, you know, someone who's maybe not known,
but he's just a very accomplished in business.
Like they've just been very successful.
The bar is higher.
Of course it is.
But I think that can also help drive you, you know?
I mean, we didn't have a dad who was like, you know, putting pressure on us.
Like I could accomplish this so you have to accomplish that.
But he very much would be like, you know, people would say to him,
why didn't you push your daughters to be in music?
And he'd be like, that's not my job to push them.
to be a music. My parents didn't push me to be a music. It was a choice that I made because I was
driven to do that. And so if you're driven to do that, you'll show up, you know where I am. I'm in the
studio every single day after school. If you want to be there, you know where it is. But I shouldn't
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One thing that I find really refreshing about both of you two from afar is that you don't seem affected by
a certain vapidness of Hollywood. And I'm not talking about, I'm talking about just like
peers maybe of, of not friends, peers around you. There's a really like a down to earthness
about you. Do you guys get that a lot? Where does that come from? Well, we have our mom credit for that.
Yeah. I mean, honestly, our dad is too. Our dad is for all that he's accomplished. He's really
down to our, thank you first of all for saying that. I've learned in therapy. You're supposed to
like let compliments land. So that's really nice. Thank you for saying that. I honestly say our mom
because we're women and you look at your mom for sort of the like setting the, setting the,
the standard of how you, you know, what your relationship with the world is or how you relate
to other women or beauty. And our mom is just very earthy. And she's very like, she goes up to women
and tells women how beautiful they are all the time. And she's, she's just not stuck in vanity.
She's really quick to tell you how old she is. And she looks very real and normal. And I think growing up
and seeing that as an example compared to a lot of the other things around just really made me want to,
like age gracefully and be comfortable my own skin.
How do you guys deal with the vapidness that does come along with Hollywood?
It's so weird.
I don't know if it's like for me if I never fully feel like I belong.
So there's that part of you that still would appear down to earth because I don't feel
this entitled.
I feel like anything I've built can be taken away from me at any time.
So I'm always so afraid.
I mean, listen, this is bad.
I operate.
Sarah lives with a lot of fear.
I would live with a lot of fear, like a lot of self-esteem issues.
I don't have that.
I don't have that.
Aaron's like, I am a 10.
No, but I just don't have that.
No, no.
She doesn't have.
And you know what's interesting?
I was going to say when we're talking about privilege, there are so many sort of layers and levels
of privilege.
Like, I think it's real privilege to grow up in a home with two parents who make you feel
really seen.
I have friends who are literally the most confident women you have ever.
met in your life and it came from the home they grew up in. It came from being in a home with two
loving parents who were on the same page who mirrored like an incredible relationship and they're
winning in life because of that step up. You know, I do think that there are so many layers of
privilege. Are you answering the question? I don't know if you are. I don't know. Why do you think
why are you so fearful? Oh God. What are you so afraid of Sarah? Everything. No, listen, I think that
I have a lot of guilt about my privilege.
I think I have a lot of guilt about the opportunities we've been given.
I think I feel guilt around, I don't know.
I'm just always afraid things are going to be taken.
I have a book for you.
Have you read Michael's going to get mad?
I mentioned it every episode because it's changed my life.
You can heal your life by Louise Hay.
Oh, I don't know it.
You're such a little book nerd.
I love it.
I know.
I love this about you.
It's so cool you can read.
You want to.
I'm so happy for you.
No, you don't have to even read it.
You can just listen to it.
Do you know I've never done that?
I've never done that audio book.
You can read this book.
I listen to this book eight times a year.
Interesting.
Just everything you're saying is this?
It will teach you how to completely flip everything you just said.
Sarah lives in fear there's not enough of something, right?
She always thinks like, I'm not going to make enough money or I'm not going to,
there's something that's not enough.
And I just always for some reason think there's enough.
But that goes back to our child.
that goes back to I was paying attention to things that she wasn't paying attention to.
Because you were older.
Yeah. So I was paying attention to my mom always being like, oh God, like, I don't know if I can pay for this.
Or I don't know if, you know, always fearful around those things.
I had this conversation with my mother the other day because I have two younger siblings.
And when I was a kid, my parents were going through tough times.
And I think like when I was three, four, five, I would see them freaking out about all those tough times.
But then when my sisters came along, things were better.
So I'm wired a little bit the same way.
You guys like why do what can happen.
I think that probably if you're in a, if you're a child and your parents are going through
that kind of stuff, you're getting that kind of.
Well, my mom would come to me when she'd be stressed.
She'd be like, oh, the child support hasn't come yet.
Like, I don't know if we can do that thing.
I mean, she would talk to me.
So you internalize all of it.
Yes.
And it's taken us so long to unpack that.
For her, I think for you to be like, oh, yeah, that makes sense.
Like you were the oldest.
Because I just thought she was a pathological liar.
She would talk about her childhood.
I'm like, girl, you can't go around saying like we didn't grow up with anything.
And like, you can't say that.
We grew up with a lot, you know.
I think that stuff gets wired really early.
Because my other sister's 10 years younger than me,
and by the time she came along, yeah, that everything was rolling for her.
I'm more like you.
Yeah.
I'm like, you're always like, I'm going to be great.
So much money.
Spend the money because we're going to make more.
I feel like you just have to just tell yourself that.
I do think it's a bit of a state of mind because you have to be, you have to, A, believe.
You have to be, you have to bet on yourself.
Yeah.
Right?
Like, I'm betting on myself and I know that I'm going to win.
And then B,
If I don't win, if I lose money, if this is the peak of where I get to, that has to be okay.
Yeah.
It just has to be.
Like, I am very comfortable living with what is.
Not what I want it to be, but like what is.
Like, I can make the most of it.
I really believe that I can make the most of it.
You're also not on this train that I think a lot of people are on right now, which is this hustle mentality
where people are so addicted to more and more and more and nothing's enough.
It's like we live in this multi-hyphenate world.
world now where if you don't have a podcast and a brand, investments, and you work at a tech
company and you're acting, like, then you're not doing enough. You're 100% right. And I think,
yeah, and I think that it's not, it's really actually bad because everyone ends up doing just like
30% at everything. And you can't be 100% at all those things. And I'm sitting here as someone who has
a lot of different, my hand and a lot of different things. And I sort of sometimes go like,
okay, have all these things happen because I've just been really trying to understand.
Like the motivation behind it?
Yeah, and be intentional with everything we're doing. And you're somebody that doesn't fall into that trap.
Like, you're not this person that feels this addiction to any of it. And I think, honestly,
you have like, when you have innate talent, when you are a writer, when you are someone who truly,
no one can take that from you. You don't need Instagram. She's like, not even not. You don't need it to give you
validation. And I think we live in a world now where it used to be, we only knew someone's name
if they were like killing it. Right. But now, because of all the things, it just fucks with people,
I think. I think it really fucks with people and you don't have it. I struggle a lot with all the
things you just listed and then showing up as a mother. Oh, yeah. Because it's like you got to check
all the boxes and then also like I want to be the best mother, but you can't, it's like,
the 30% thing you said.
I totally understand that.
I feel like I'm sometimes doing things
30%. And you really don't want to be doing 30% of being a mom.
And that's really hard.
At the same time,
to do it 100% hands-on, always present,
would take away from doing the career.
And I don't think that would make me fully fulfilled.
So it's a mind fuck.
But your kids are, do you guys have boys or girls?
A boy and a girl.
Oh, the perfect family. It's so cute. But I think that you have to also remember that, you know, for kids growing up with a working mom who's like, I love you, I want to be there, I have to miss this thing, is also a sense of pride that you give your kids. Because as they get older, they're really proud. You have a boy who's going to want to fall in love with a woman who is independent and makes her own money. And a girl who looks up and is like, I can do it all. Like I can be a mom and I can work. And so if you reframe it, I feel like your kids are.
going to one day be like, it's really dope that you were working your ass off when you're raising
us.
I hope so.
But I do have to say my son is going to be living with me for the rest of his life.
You're marrying your son.
I whispered atopis in his ear.
So fucking weird.
Mom's in their sons.
So my son's going to stay with me.
So you're in a relationship with yourself.
Let me tell you, all my guy friends that had moms that did all that stuff, they struggle a lot
later with women.
No, to go off under the umbilical cord and how you didn't have it.
They're not used to getting with a woman that doesn't make everything about
them. Because the main moment of their life makes everything about them.
Michael's mom did not make everything about him. Set me up. Perfect.
Your mom's half. It's hard. It's hard to tell. I really don't see this video.
My sister's see a little bit more. Your mom is half Japanese. Yeah, she's half Japanese. I'm
quarter Japanese. I am fascinated. But you're the whitest looking person. She's half Italian. His penis is
Asian. It's a quarter Japanese penis. Um, no, but she. They're really known for being really
well endowed. That's a great.
It's like, it's like, I was just saying like I had the dynamic of like that kind of Asian household.
It's like a little and I'm grateful for it now.
And she worked all the time too.
I'm attracted to women that are doing things.
But I see a lot of my guy friends that moms, they baby them and made them up everything.
And then they get in relationship and they don't get that.
They're like, what's going on?
Here's how I justify it.
Okay.
Here's how I justify it.
Don't set them up to be, don't set them up to fail.
No.
I justify all the things I do and things that I miss for my, you know, my kids.
I justify it because you have to know when to say no to people, right?
And to events and to invitations and to trips.
So it's like for me, I'm saying, I'm getting invited to something, you know, really cool,
some Hollywood event.
And I'm going, no, thank you.
I'm staying home.
I'm putting my kids to bed.
So I think what happens is we see a lot of working, you know, moms who don't know how to.
What's the air quotes?
Are they not really working?
No, but just a lot of women who don't know how to say no.
So it's like, you're doing the podcast.
You're doing the brand. You're doing the this. You're doing the this. You're doing the that. You're doing the business stuff, whatever. And you're also like out every night. Right. You're teaching that addiction to your kids. Yeah. So I think if there's a balance, I think if you're doing all the things, that's great. But for me, I just think I don't, I don't. And this is probably bad, but I don't really go on like Cabo trips. And some would say that's bad. Some would say you need to go do the Cabo trips with your girlfriends. But for me, the only way for it all to work with me is I'm really, I put my kids to bed.
basically every night.
I'm the same way.
Every night.
And I drive them to school every morning.
Every housewife I've ever interviewed.
I'm like, how do you do those girls trips?
I'm like, oh, those are insane.
They're so toxic.
And I don't want to be judgmental because I've been judgmental on my podcast since like, who the
fuck am I?
Like, everyone should do what works for them.
I'm just saying what works for me and why my kids don't feel like my mom is always gone.
And my mom's always doing this is because of nighttime.
I like to be in bed at 7.30.
So I'm on the same vibration.
And that's why I like Austin, because it's a protective.
and we can come here and we can do what we need to do and come with our briefcase and leave with it and
we're back when did you guys move to austin 20 that's cool and it's like i'm the same way and i look
through it of a lens is like is this worth being away from my kid i also don't have phomo do you have
you must not yeah so fomo but you guys fomos are real no we we get i get gomo joy of missing out
yeah we mostly we say no almost everything get joan mo now though i'm noticing
it could change things yeah listen i only want to do things i want to do yeah
Same.
Yeah, you were asking when you came, like, we do, we'll do this like a hard week of just like a bunch of these.
But then we're kind of reclusive.
Do you guys have a vitamin company?
Did I make that up?
No.
You don't have a vitamin company?
No.
Maybe you've worked with.
You have something, but you have like products.
It's got like fraud vibes though.
Oh, I'm going to give you an ice roller.
Yeah, you're the ice roller.
But wait, you have nothing to do with any vitamin company.
I mean, I'm sure we talk about a lot of, you know, we talk about health and wellness a lot.
A lot of interesting you guys doing this podcast together.
I'm so fascinated.
Like that dynamic.
It's cool.
Well, look at it this way.
We've known each other since we were 12.
Sometimes people get weird about the banter.
I'm sure that you guys get that too.
People get mad about the banter.
Knowing somebody.
They can imagine.
Since you were 12, right?
But in a romantic relationship, it's different because there's an expectation of siblings
to be bitchy towards each other.
But in a relationship, it's like it's a more fragile dynamic.
So I could see how people would try to find fault in that.
I guess I love your guys dynamic.
I get eaten alive.
On YouTube, they're like so mean to her husband.
And I'm like, he loves it.
He likes being heckled.
Every woman in my life, again, going back to moms, mothers and sons, like, every woman in my life that I have strong relationships with.
Like, even like this business, I co-founded with my partner as a woman, right?
Wait, what's the business?
Do your media.
Wait, is your media yours?
Yeah, I'm the CEO.
Good for you.
Yeah.
Oh, my God.
You and network your home.
What the fuck?
You, this is your business.
Oh, you're like, why am?
But I get it.
Oh, my God.
Oh, he just got hot.
She's like, oh, ah, forget about the airline.
No, she's into him now.
You know what?
I can use it.
I slowly re-almond over time.
Sarah just started taking you way more seriously.
No, no, no.
You just sat up straight.
I'm like, Mike.
We slowly, yeah, Patty Stinger was here the other day, and I was like, I slowly reel him in that way.
That's really funny.
You don't want to lead with it, you know?
No, but I think like.
You're literally talking on a dear media mic with the dear media background in,
and you could be wearing a deer.
mean a shirt. Listen, the pod, I love doing the podcast with my wife, but from an enterprise
standpoint, I needed to make it a little bigger, right? I need to be like, I like a man who thinks
big. I can't just say like, we're just going to do a podcast together for, we got to like think
a little bigger. But what, but most of the women. Like Mauricio, like Maricio. Maricio's not just
that husband. He is a rich as fuck. Well, they're actually divorced, I think.
Okay. I think that's ending very well. I don't know where I even came up with that comparison.
We like Marisa. He was on the show. Yeah. Well, he's doing very well. No, but I'm mostly attracted to
very strong women in my life. That's who I spend most of the time with. I've done very poorly with,
and I'm, I don't get fucking eaten for this. I've done very poorly with women where I can just kind of
like truck over. I need somebody that's going to like really give it to me. But you shouldn't get
burned for that because the truth is like we all have the issues that we were given from our
childhood or whatever. We all have our preferences. And if there's a girl who, you know, there's plenty of
guys who like girls that are a damsel in distress and they want to be saved. And that's not what you're
attracted to. And you're allowed to be attracted to whatever you want.
want. Like I don't need the meal on the table at home. Like, I would be like, what are you doing?
I'm also like, I'm not an octopus. Like, what do you want to? Like, it's like the blowjob, the brand.
I got to be a mom. Are you doing a lot of blow jobs? I do a blowjob all the time. I'll do a blowjob all the time.
You're doing weekly blowjobs? Whenever. Whenever he wants. That's a hot tip to be. Wait, way, way, way, way, way.
I can break it down. I have a whole theory on this. Wait, hold on. So, wait.
We haven't been this long for no reason. No, no. Okay. So there is never been a time when he,
He's like, wants to hug.
Or is like, okay.
And you're like, I'm tired.
Oh, yes, sorry.
And you're like, I'm tired.
Like, I'm tired.
Not tonight.
I'm tired all the time.
But you just grin and bear it.
No, but no.
I'm going to tell advice.
I say this on the podcast.
I called my stepmom when we were first dating when I was 21 years old and I was
bartending until midnight.
And I was doing this blog and I was exhausted.
And I was going to school full time.
And I said, he wants to have sex all the time.
I'm just tired.
And my.
stepmom goes, Lauren, you rally.
And ever since she said that to me, in my entire life, I rally.
Wow.
Because I think, like, no, but hold on.
I think it's important.
I do, and people get mad at me for saying this.
You're going to paint a bad picture.
No, no, I know a lot of women.
I don't think it's a bad picture.
If I see that she's, like, beat up and done and tired, I'm not like, let's fucking go.
I have, like, little tricks that I can tell you later, like, I mouth tape my mouth shut and let's look at do not disturb.
Yeah, like, I'm not a creep about it.
I'm not going to be like, hey, you look really disheumbled.
You're not going to like, shame her if she doesn't want to.
Yeah, I'm not like, hey, you said you'd rally and you're like on your last leg.
No, no, he's, he's, he's.
You're thoughtful.
Okay, so you don't have like flu sex or you do?
Blue sex.
We've had flu sex.
I don't know if it's like.
I don't know if I'm into flu sex.
I don't know if I'm into flu sex either.
You're not asking for it.
I'll rally.
Good for you.
And I think you'll be married forever.
I don't know.
You know, I don't know.
I might want to evolve.
I might want to have a second.
marriage and third, I don't know who knows.
Wow.
I do think that
low jobs are a secret sauce to a happy marriage.
I do.
It's once you get the hang of it too
and it's like, it's two minutes of your life.
I was just give me a little more credit.
If you know what you're doing, it really shouldn't take that long.
I took a class once.
I don't know if it really worked.
But like there, have you heard this like basket weave thing?
I took a whole class.
Like you're supposed to like basket weed.
You're supposed to work the tip.
That is what?
Basket we've grown like this.
What is this?
I've never seen.
Wait, I don't know.
I think it's like this not.
I will say.
I don't think you need any lessons.
You guys, I've been in a relationship for 17 years.
So, like, blow jobs are, like, 17 years.
Yeah, 17 years.
That's good for you.
Congratulations.
That's awesome.
We met in New York at Nobu next door.
So it's like a really long story.
Well, I don't know if it is.
I don't think it's a year.
17 years is a long time.
It's a really long time.
Married 17 together, 17.
We're not married.
Okay.
Together 17 years, two kids.
Your Goldie Haunting.
Yeah.
She got that example of the Goldie Haunting.
I like that.
Well, I just was always like, okay.
If you don't get married, you can't get divorced.
Like, I cannot get married.
But I never dreamed of a wedding.
Like, I was proposed to by guys I was in love with pre him.
And I was like, it was not, like, exciting to me.
I think that's so cool that you've been together 17 years and you're not married.
Yeah, but it doesn't come with its own issues.
Why?
Because he is more traditional.
I mean, the truth is, like, it's not the healthiest.
Looking at it in hindsight, it probably would have been better to do it.
But you won't do it now even after all this time?
Well, I don't mean.
This is, she's got to, she has 20 different things going on.
And she already's feeling like the 30% thing.
And now you got to get married on top of several.
Well, I would never do like a wedding.
And I just met you.
But, you know, might as well.
Yeah.
Seems like a little bit of like a trauma thing here.
He was like 17 years.
He hasn't he proven, you know, if he wants that.
Yeah.
Well, I think it gets to a point where it turns like, it becomes like more resentful.
He's always like, oh, well, like, fuck you.
You don't mean.
Not he doesn't say that.
But I think it becomes a thing like the man proposes.
He proposed.
And I was very much like, oh, no, we are not getting married.
Like, let's just be together.
That marriage is, what if we get divorced?
That's so traumatizing.
It's a objection at some point.
Exactly.
But I didn't look at it like that for a long time.
I mean, you know, it's fine.
We have two kids, the 17 years.
It's a very long time.
But I think it's sexy.
I don't.
It is complicated.
Yeah.
I think it's sexy.
It becomes, I thought it was sexy.
And the truth is it maybe is a little complicated.
And the kids are a little bit like, huh.
And, you know, he's like, well, ask mom.
Kids have his last name?
Yeah.
Okay.
Yeah, they have his last name.
And how old are they?
Yeah.
13 and 8.
13 and 8.
Yeah.
I think it's hot and sexy.
Yeah.
And what I like about it...
Could have saved a lot of paperwork and a lot of time.
What I do like about it is like you guys want to stay because you want to stay.
I think there's something loving in that.
Totally.
Does that make sense?
No, either one of us could walk out at any time.
That's literally we don't have...
It would be hard.
It would be hard.
That's true.
And how long have you been married?
Yeah.
I've been married since.
What year is it? Four years.
Four years. Yeah. And do you like being married?
I love being married. And what's your husband's five?
Aaron's like a housewife. Aaron's like Aaron lives for cooking. She's like a Michelin Star Chef every night.
She'll literally come home from a 15-hour writer's room, pregnant, show up, blow him and then make him a meal.
You know what? And then clean the kitchen.
Actually, Lauren, maybe I do need you to switch gears a little bit.
Anyway, she's like an insane cook.
You're nine months pregnant cooking, blowing all the things. All of it. Yeah. Wow.
And and working.
See, Lauren, you say you can't cook.
You can.
I do everything that is on the list.
Looks like you can do one more now.
Aaron's an insane cook.
No, I wife pretty hard.
But my husband is just the best.
Like, we're just, I don't know.
We just got really, really lucky with each other and we're just obsessed with each other.
How did you guys meet?
At the gym.
Wow.
Did he come up to you?
No, I hit on him.
Well, she slid into his dance.
Yeah, that's true.
Wait, you saw him working out at the gym and then you found him on Instagram.
Well, I saw him working out of the gym.
Sarah worked out the same gym
and Sarah dressed
is like a huge horror at the gym
and so do I.
He didn't hit on her
and I was like that's a good step
in the right direction.
He also didn't hit on me.
Oh he did.
Sarah's like yeah he did.
No he did not.
I mean I wouldn't have blamed him if he did.
He was just very much like
you don't hit on girls at the gym
because then it like
you screws up your like your schedule
if something gets weird.
You know like he's like
I don't want to lose my like 9 a time slot.
Yeah.
So it's not worth it to me.
He's like a very good guy.
Yeah.
So anyway I just started feeling like
something was up with him.
Like I just felt a vibe.
I was like, I just liked his vibe.
I got kind of drunk by myself one night.
And I went on to the gym's Instagram.
I see this is, I love his stock.
Like this, keep going, walk us through it.
The cousin's sister's dad, dogs.
Then I found the trainers.
And then I found his trainer.
Yep.
Found it.
And then I found who his trainer follows.
Found a guy named Simon.
Yeah.
And I was like, fuck, it's private.
I can't like snoop around his life.
I don't know if he's a girlfriend.
I don't know how old he is.
So I'll just.
Follow.
And that's how it started.
Yeah.
You know, I have to say, I'm happy that that worked out for you, but I would not like to be hit on at the gym.
If I was sweating and working out and a guy came up to me, I'd be like, what?
That's why he said that it was like never appropriate.
I get it.
He was very much like, there's a boundary there.
I'm not going to cross it.
And I was like, well, I will cross it.
Yeah.
It's okay if the girl cross it.
But it's a little creepy when the guy.
Yeah, I agree.
But there is like kind of an interesting lesson in this is that we found out your.
later that years before that, one of Aaron's friends had said to him, you know who you should
meet Aaron Foster? No, no, no. There was no names. There wasn't? No, there was no names. But our,
my girlfriend, our girlfriend, Julie Yoran, this girl was playing a poker game at someone's house.
She was sat next to Simon three years before we met. And I'm two years older than Simon.
And he was like a fuck boy before we met. And they were sitting at this poker game and she was like,
you are such a great guy. Like, I have a girlfriend. I would love to set you up with.
and he goes, how old is she?
And she said, 33.
And he's like, no, I'm out.
And then he met me in person two years later
when I was 35.
And he was into me in person.
But the idea of a 33-year-old
was not for him.
I noticed that your friends can be like that too.
I think every guy can be like that.
Yeah.
I have to do, I would love you guys' take on this.
There's a little bit of an epidemic going on.
What is it?
The epidemic is that guys are trying to pick the girl
like they're picking out a cake at Vons.
It's like vanilla, cherry sprinkles.
I want a rim of lace
with 16 black candles, plastic.
You can't get every single little tiny little detail.
You're not going to find anyone.
But it's also when you're dating online,
you're looking at a profile like it's a cake, right?
You're like, it's a menu.
Okay, he's this height, he has this color hair,
he's been married this many times.
He has this many kids.
He does this for a living.
So he probably makes this amount of money.
This is what his friends look like.
You're looking at it like it's a menu.
And it's such an interesting example that for Simon,
the idea of a woman in her 30s,
he was like, I'm not interested in that because I don't want what she wants.
A woman who's 33 wants to settle down.
That's not where I'm at my life.
But then in real life, he meets someone two years later who's 35 now,
who's like definitely looking to settle down.
But you aren't looking at it like these menu options.
You're looking at like a person.
And he liked the whole package.
He just didn't like the idea when you're giving the stats.
We always say on paper people never, it's never as good as you think.
Like we have friends who are, you know, 40 with three kids and blah, blah, you go tell a single guy that like, oh, she's 40, she's got a couple.
You're like, no, that's a pass.
But then you meet her in person.
You're like, holy shit.
I can make this work.
She's freaking hot.
She's fun.
She's cool.
She's intelligent.
And that's the problem with dating online, I think.
Like, because Simon and I were both on the same dating apps.
but like I probably wasn't in his algorithm
because he like cut the age off before me
you know. Right. But I imagine
you guys are soulmates. Joe Rogan was on the
dating app. Like he's like I think he's 5'6.
Literally. He has no hair.
Like I think that people need to be a little bit more
fluid that like what you guys are saying
like you got to like meet someone in person
and feel their essence and like
feel their frequency. And like I mean
it's so easy to judge someone so good. And we're saying that
as former creative directors of Bumble.
Like we worked at Bumble for
for years. After we did the episode about air quality, I personally emailed the Jasper team and said,
can you guys come over to my house and put a Jasper air filter in both my kids' rooms and downstairs.
I already had two, but I wanted two more in my house. I just think it made so much sense when he was
saying that we all think about what we're eating, what skin products we use. And none of us are thinking about the
air that we're breathing and we're in the air all day. It's the most beautiful air purifier on the market
by far, but it's also the most effective. I have found my sleep is so much better when I sleep with
it on. I wouldn't even give it to my kids. On the episode, I was like, I'm keeping my own. My kids
have to get another one. It's awesome for sleep, mold, allergies, skin, aging. If you have eczema,
if you have any rashes, it's great for that. I also think if you have asthma, it's a non-negotiable.
So my sleep stack is red light, little magnesium water, my Kindle, Skinny Confidential mouth tape, and a Jasper.
This is the ultimate sleep sack, let me tell you.
But clean air is really a non-negotiable.
This is so important.
We're breathing it every single day, all day long.
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I have possibly the best PMS hack on the planet. And I've been playing with this and trying it and it is so good, you guys. Okay. So sometimes I'll get like a stomach ache when I'm on my period or like a cramp. And what I've been doing is I'm spraying.
2,700 plus milligrams of elemental magnesium on my stomach. Okay? This is a miracle mineral and it's known to
ease discomfort and soothe period symptoms. So the other night, not only did I do that, I sprayed it all
over my stomach. Then I took my heated, warmed lavender neck pillow and I put it on top of this
magnesium spray that I put on my stomach. And it was seriously insane. I didn't need to take an
Advil, I could just lay there and relax, and the amazing magnesium did its work. The one that I've
been using is a cycle soothing spray, and it's by Primally Pure. I will never, ever, ever in my life,
have my period again without this cycle soothing spray and my weighted neck pillow on my stomach.
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You may have heard me talk about my daily non-negotiables on past episodes, one of which is a
morning walk with my son. So after I wake up,
I try to make the bed. I hydrate with an electrolyte water and I do my quick wellness and
skincare routine. I make my kids breakfast. Then my son and I go outside for a walk. So he is in the
stroller and I'm doing a walking meditation. We get in our morning light and movement in and we love it.
It's like a habit stack if I've ever seen one. And during those morning walks, I'm wearing Nike,
specifically at my indie bra and my Nike Motiva walking shoes. The bra is so supportive. In fact,
it comes in different support levels so you can get like low, medium or high support depending on the size of your boobs or preference.
Plus, the bra has adjustable straps and is so comfortable.
Nike's Motiva walking shoes are smooth.
They're cushion.
They're comfortable.
They're great for like a daily walk.
And what I like about them is they give you optimum support for every move every day.
I have planar fasciitis and these are amazing for that.
Both the Indy bra and the Nike Motivas are the move.
The indie bra just sculpts your body in a perfect way.
I feel like we've been talking a lot lately about tailored, well-fitting clothes, and this is it when it comes to athletic wear.
Another thing that I love is they're both so durable.
So you're getting high-quality, flattering apparel that you can wash and wear over and over again.
You'll just keep reaching for these staples just like me. Shop now at Nike.com.
Again, that's Nike.com.
Creative directors of Bumble. Did you love doing that?
We loved it. It was great.
No, it was awesome.
How did you guys?
You guys were early there.
We were early there.
How did you get that?
Like, what did you do as a career?
creative director? Because her team, Whitney's team, the founder of Bumble, her team loved our show. So she
just, we came and did a speaking engagement to her team. No, not to her team. We did a, we did a,
like a, like a, we did a panel with her at whatever it was. It was a speaking engagement. What year did
you join? 2017. It's early. Yeah, yeah, it was really cool. I mean, that really is what kicked off
us navigating into like tech and more of a business out of our car. I was going to ask you guys how
you got into investing and all that because you're savvy investors. It really started with Bumble because
Bumble really opened our eyes. Whitney is really cool about thinking outside the box. And so we had this
great panel. She saw that we really could like speak to women. And she thought, I want to hire you guys in a
larger capacity. And so she brought us on. And it really kind of woke us up to our abilities outside of
entertainment. And then that kind of made us confident to start. We'd never had equity in a company before.
By the way, everyone told us not to take the job. They were like, you are just coming into your own.
I know.
Yeah, but we found that a lot in our careers,
but everyone was like,
you are just coming off of your show, barely famous.
It was getting, it was sort of, it was getting,
people were talking about it and putting us in a box that we had never been in.
We were all the sudden these respected comedic actresses,
and it was opening up this whole new world for us,
and then we went and took that job.
So people were like, wait a minute,
the New York Times is saying you guys are like the blonde,
curfier enthusiasm.
It's like a Vegas residency and like thinking that your career's over or something.
Right.
I wasn't the market for that, but I remember feeling like when that happened, like the brand got a personality.
Does that make sense?
That was Whitney's.
Yeah, that's great.
I think it's hot to have just a position.
Like, you know when Supreme does a collab with like something so random?
And you're like, huh?
Or when Glossier did the collab with Swiss Miss chocolate.
I didn't see that, but that's cool.
You remember Swiss Miss, like the chocolate powder and Glossier did that.
I like love how you wouldn't.
Like an unexpected pairing.
Yes.
Yeah.
That's why I thought that.
thing. It's like, it felt cool. You know what I mean?
It was really cool for us. I mean, it really set us on a different path. And that I think, you know,
now it's really common for people in entertainment to be connected with a brand like that. But at
the time, it wasn't. And so it was one of those things that really taught us to take a risk and say yes
to something that might seem sort of out of your comfort zone or you might fail at it. But you don't
know until you try. And what's the worse it happens? Like, you fail and then you go back to something
else. And I think you just have to, it's another area where I think for Sarah, she was really scared and worried to fail at it and that it like sends us down the wrong path. And for me, I was like, this is sort of a once in a lifetime opportunity. You have this crazy chance and it either pays off like really, really big or it kind of goes away. And I was just really excited. Because for the first time in my life, I was sort of being taken seriously as an actress. I mean, kind of. You know, and I'd never experienced that. So I was finally feeling that. And I was finally feeling that. And I was. And I was finally feeling that. And I.
And then I was like, wait, if we go do this, then I'm not going to get another opportunity.
Like then I was just everything I do, everything I do is fear-based, you know.
But then what happened is, you know, a huge part of investing in early-stage consumer companies is,
is you're educating the customer, right?
So we had to educate the customer on why it's not lame to go find a friend on Bumble,
you know, because we were brought on to launch the Bumble BFF and biz, arms of the business.
So a lot of education comes along with that.
Like, guys, it's cool.
Like, it's cool to meet friends online.
It's cool to meet business, potential business partners online.
And then from that, we got the mirror, which was, it was pre-launch, early stage, the workout
mirror.
And we had to then educate the consumer on why it's not weird to work out to a mirror.
And it became this thing like, oh, you want to launch your brand?
Like, call the fosters.
Like, bring them on.
So that's how we started just getting so much deal flow.
And we were angel investing and writing small checks and all.
always getting advisory shares. And it got to a point where we were just, we were leaving too much
money on the table by not raising money.
You started your own fund. We raised money because we wanted to write, you know, $400,000
checks instead of $25,000 checks. So how do you even think to start that and conceptualize it?
How does that even start? Well, we had a problem. Okay. Our problem was we're getting deal flow
that we can't fill. So we're getting allocations to deals that are really good and where we'd be
so lucky to be on the cap table.
And we're like, we don't have the personal capital anymore.
We'll give you a million dollar allocation.
Like, okay, we don't have the million for all of these different deals.
A million.
I mean, 150,000.
Sure, whatever it was.
So Aaron's husband goes, you guys, you've reached the point now.
Like, you need real skin in the game.
You need to own between, you know, three and 10% of these businesses that you are helping.
I know.
You guys need to go.
All those well jobs are really, uh, get it.
He thinks very clearly.
Blow the house down.
He's like, you guys need to go out and you need to raise money.
But you need to do it with a great partner because you're doing a million other
things. So I know who your partner should be. It should be this guy, Phil Schwartz. Phil is an investor
out of Chicago. He brought us the mirror because it was too late stage for his firm. He brought it to us.
We had stayed in contact with him. And he's like, that's who you need to do it with. So he's our
partner. His fund in Chicago anchored our fund. And it's like an incredible, it's an incredible
partnership. So what kind of, what stage companies are you looking at now? I mean like seed,
like we're opportunistic up to a little bit of the fund, but I wonder we should.
Well, there's not asked you. We should. You asked about the supplement thing.
Now I understand me, because what we do through here is we will write checks, but we're not a VC, so we'll do early.
And we like we stood up these brands.
But you don't like lead rounds.
We have led rounds.
Oh, interesting.
But early.
But then we'll go into things.
I don't know how much I want to say, but after I'll tell you.
But we go into a lot of things.
And the theory is that then this platform of Dear Media can help accelerate those things.
Yeah.
Yeah.
But to your point.
You're like, if I'm moving the needle for you guys, I need a, I need a.
But we find people like you that will lead.
And then we'll say, okay, we don't lead rounds.
Okay.
But our partner does.
But our partner does.
But you get up saying?
It's like, like, the theory is like, okay, like, could this platform give a greater lift
to whatever it is.
And I think what's cool about Dear Media is that there's a hundred podcasts on it so you can
put it through the funnel of the podcast.
Yeah.
Totally.
No, you guys have built an incredible thing.
Yeah.
It's all him.
No, no.
No, it's not.
No, it's not.
It's not all me.
Don't let yourself show.
Those blow jobs are really getting things done.
No.
Slow jobs, talent recommendation.
Maybe similar to you guys.
Conversation.
No, it's a partnership.
He talks a lot in the morning.
No, but I looked at like how hard it was.
Because I come from the econ world.
I look at how expensive it was getting.
I'm like, what's the unfair advantage is if you could eliminate that spend?
You mean to acquire a customer?
Yeah.
So if you can eliminate that spend and speak directly to the person, that's an unfair advantage.
Well, that's what we're doing, favorite daughter with our clothing company.
Yeah, I want to talk about you as entrepreneurs.
Because I look at you as entrepreneurs now.
Is that how you would identify?
I would like that.
Yeah. I mean, it's crazy.
Multi-hyphen it.
Yeah. I mean, I think, sure, I'll take it all.
I mean, I think, I don't know for you.
I mean, Aaron's the creator of a Kristen Bell Netflix show that premieres in October.
September.
No big deal.
So.
Casual.
Yeah, casual.
Casual.
Well, let's see if it's a hit.
Hopefully it's a hit.
It's no.
It's going to be a hit.
It's for sure a hit.
It's going to be the biggest hit ever.
It's going to be.
You're kind of funny because, well, you're really funny.
Because you're like very confident.
but also like kind of hedging a little bit.
Does that make sense?
Yeah, I try not to get...
Like it's a big deal what we're talking about.
Did you guys think you were going to come to therapy?
It is a big deal.
No, it's a big deal, but I think I always just...
I think I try to take things with like a measured amount of excitement or enthusiasm because...
I mean, disappointments.
Yeah, like especially as a writer, honestly, you do a lot of work that you don't get paid to do
or you get paid really good money for something that never makes it on the air.
And the second, something is drawing.
or canceled or they don't want your script or whatever it is,
you genuinely have to close that chapter and move on to the next thing.
You have to get over it.
Like, there's no turning back.
No one else is going to buy it from you now.
Like those words will go nowhere.
No one will see them.
You just have to let it go.
I mean, occasionally other streamers or networks will come and revive, but it very seldom.
Once you're dead, you're dead.
So I just sort of have a mentality of like if it's a hit, everyone's going to know it's a hit
and I don't have to talk about it, right?
If I hype it up and it's not a hit, then that I'll be embarrassing.
So I like to try to let it speak for itself.
I feel like though you have to go through all those different things you went through
to get to where you need to be.
Does that make sense?
Totally.
Like, no, I've had a really unique year that has felt really exciting.
I'm not trying to downplay it in a way that it's like so humble.
It's unrealistic or something.
Like it's more an internal thing where I get really excited and proud of myself in like
small ways, but I get nervous to hype something up publicly
because I have no control at this point.
whether people love it or hate it, you know,
so I kind of am curious to see what happened.
But it was very interesting for me to be pregnant
while shooting, you know,
my first, like, full to series show on Netflix
with stars that were in it like they were in it.
It was really surreal for me and really challenging
and, you know, fulfilling in a very cool way.
What's it about?
It's loosely based on me.
When I met my husband, I converted to Judaism for him.
for me, but you know, because of him.
And the process was just so interesting.
And so I sold a show about a girl who has a podcast that's sort of about like sex in the modern world.
And then she falls in love with this guy who's this young, cute rabbi.
So my husband's not a rabbi.
He's just Jewish.
But for the sake of the show, you know, you like dial it up a little bit.
But to be clear, we sold this when we had a deal at Disney like five years ago.
So the fact that it's actually happening now, I think there's.
such a disconnect that people don't understand how long things can actually take, you know?
And then it becomes real when Kristen Bell and Adam Brody want to be in it.
Yeah, they're really cute together.
So do you just keep firing off things?
Like that one you did.
You have to wait five years.
But in between, are you just keep going?
Ten things under our deal.
We didn't sell anything.
But I was having a real crisis of faith for a few years because I was a writer who wrote
about my life experiences, typically about being single and not figuring it out.
and then I met someone and I got really happy and I didn't feel very inspired and he's very private so he was
sort of like you can't really write about our life and then I sold this idea and it was sort of uncomfortable
for him because he was like ways to you're like making fun of me and my family and how different
we are from you and your family and it just I realize that there's another person in my life that
I have to take into account now I can't just like making fun of myself is easy but there's
this other person there so it was uncomfortable for a while for me to figure out how to
do it. And I honestly did get really into being a wife and like becoming domestic and we were trying
to have kids for like for so long now since we got together basically. And that just became my focus.
And all the business stuff is really fulfilling. But when you have like a creative talent that you
want to fulfill and you're not doing that, you feel a little like you're not living up to your potential.
So I had a hard time around COVID just feeling like what am I doing with my life? I'm not really
fulfilling what I'm meant to be doing.
I'm fulfilling stuff. It's fun to do.
Everything else felt like fluff to you.
And that's what I was saying.
Like when you have such an innate talent, right?
Like being a writer, it doesn't matter that you have a profitable clothing line or an
investment fund or a podcast that people really love.
If you're not doing the thing you know you are put on this earth to do, which is right,
you're not, you feel like a failure.
You feel like it.
Yeah, I did feel like a failure for sure.
So then when the show finally got bought, like so many years later, it was really
satisfying for me, even though it was hard doing it pregnant, all the things. But like, it felt like
things had come full circle and I had figured out a way to have that too. How are you guys
structuring your day with all the stuff you have going on? Do you have, like, structure,
routine around it? Or is it just kind of like, we are like, what did you always,
Erud always says it calls it like the accidental empire? Like, we are not organized people. We are
a disaster. I think so that's what's endearing about you guys.
We never were like, ooh, like, let's be this sister duo and let's have all these things and let's be these people.
Like, we were late to join Instagram.
We were not, like, this was not a plan at all.
None of it.
I didn't even want a clothing company.
I don't know.
It's hard.
It's like you're saying about 30% of everything and being a mom and all that.
It is, it is hard.
It's really tricky.
I mean, I've been handling most everything while she's been on set 15 hours a day.
It's true.
And really the answer to how we do everything is because of Montana.
Montana is like keeps us on track.
I get it.
I have to have someone to be on track.
He's scared back.
there for whatever she said to him. Is she or he? She. No, we're not organized. He's a check of phone, Michael.
Well, something's working. So tell us about all the things you're doing. Well, we are really proud of
Favored Daughter. Favorite Daughter is doing really well and it's really exciting for us. And it is something
that we are very connected to. It's not like a put your name on something and walk away. We are like
in every fitting. We really care about it. And women have an emotional connection to the clothes in a way
that we feel really proud of.
And we run in fashion circles with girls who wear stuff
that we're not willing to spend money on, you know?
We would never walk into like Dior and buy something.
Like we don't dress like that.
So it really, I think you see a lot of celebrity influencer brands
that don't necessarily work.
And I think it's because they're not wearing the clothes, right?
So why do we want to buy this from you if you're wearing, you know,
Louis Vuitton all day long?
But this is how Aaron and I dress.
We created a brand for girls,
like us who want to feel chic, who want to feel put together, who don't want to stand out
like looking like shit when you're at these fancy events, but who's like who fits in?
And isn't going to spend $800 and isn't going to spend, you know.
And where can everyone shop it?
So you can.
So you can go to favorite daughter.com.
Yeah.
Go to favorite daughter.com or we're in a lot of boutiques.
We're also in Nordstrom.
Nordstrom, shopop, revolve, moda.
Yeah.
Wow.
Yeah.
Selfridges in London.
You can only say one word each.
Who's the favorite daughter?
Like name the person?
No, which one of you is the favorite daughter?
Me.
I think maybe I'm my dad's.
That's funny.
No, I'm serious.
I'm actually serious.
I was his first call when he had a surgery.
That does say a lot.
That does say a lot.
But you might be moms.
Yeah.
I think it's more that he's just, he likes to chase Sarah.
Sarah doesn't call him back and he appreciates the chase.
Oh, yeah, aloof.
You know what I'll say that.
I think it's, I think it's different at all times, I think.
Well, because the name really came out of the joke.
where, and I think everybody's parents do this, you know, like our dad would always say to each of us when we're alone with him that we were his favorite.
And then, you know, he's like, wait, he told you that.
That's a good tip.
And so we always believe that we were all the favorite.
It's kind of like succession vibes.
Yeah, exactly.
Anyways, we have a really complicated life.
You can listen to the world's first podcast where you can hear all of this.
If you hate us, then don't listen.
But if you are interested in learning more, it's all there.
Where can people find you on Instagram?
Yes, it's just our names, Aaron Foster, Sarah Foster.
Can we give away like a set to someone to follow Favorite Daughter on Instagram?
Yes, please.
Go follow at Favorite Daughter on Instagram and tell us your favorite part of this episode on my latest post at Lauren Bostic and what does one person get to win?
They can choose the outfit themselves.
Ooh, they can just go on and choose an outfit.
Pick an outfit.
You get tops and bottoms, whatever top blazer.
I mean, get creative.
If you're smart, you're going to go, oh, I need a tank top with a button down and a blazer and a belt and a pair of pants.
I mean, if you're smart.
I love it.
You guys are great.
Please come back on so I can get the rest of the juice on beauty, health, diet, and wellness.
Oh, yeah, we didn't even hit that.
We didn't even talk about that.
I know.
Well, Montana threw you out.
Sorry, Montana.
Thank you for having us.
We have like four bottles of sunscreen left in the company.
We are sold out.
All skinny confidential sunscreen is sold out for a while, but we have four bottles left.
So I'm going to give away two of those bottles.
All you have to do is go to my latest Instagram at Lauren Bostick and tell us who you
you want to hear next on the show. We love your feedback and we always take notes on who you guys are
wanting to hear. Go to at Lauren Bostic and tell us your dream guest. And I will send two of you
literally the last bottles of the caffeinated sunscreen. Make sure you join the list at shoppskinneyconfidential.com.
And you'll be the first to know when we're back in stock. That's shoppskinneyconfidential.com.
