The Boyscast with Ryan Long - #277 Kimmel Cries, Newsom Lies & Julia Roberts Doesn't like Looters Anymore

Episode Date: January 17, 2025

CALFORNIA IS ON FIRE, Celebrities can’t understand why people don’t feel bad for them, America is China Now, Danny’s is a Crypto God, Migrants Box in a French Theatre, and the REAL reason Tik Tok is shutting down SUPPORT OUR SPONSORS! Bilt - Go to https://joinbilt.com/boyscast to start earning points on rent you already pay Meundies - Go to https://meundies.com/boyscast to get 20% off and free shipping Marek Health - Go to https://marekhealth.com/boyscast and use code BOYSCAST to save 10% at checkout SUPPORT THE BOYS PATREON.COM/THEBOYSCAST  RYAN ON TOUR: Minneapolis: Jan 17-19, Phoenix: Feb 14-16, Portland: Feb 25/26, Edmonton: Jan 24-26, Tacoma: Feb 27-March 1, LA: March 30, Irvine: March 21, San Jose: March 22/23, Tampa: March 28/29, Salt Lake City: April 11/12, Denver: April 13, Atlanta: April 25/26 ryanlongcomedy.com dannycomedy.com SUPPORT THE BOYSCAST:  https://www.patreon.com/theboyscast http://ryanlongcomedy.com Ryan @ryanlongcomedy   00:00 - Branding is more important than ever 01:50 - Intro 02:15 - What a week! 02:25 - Hugh Jackman is divorcing his wife 06:29 - Danny already got banned from Rednote 11:55 - T**** Square 17:15 - The real reason tik tok’s shutting down 22:11 - Danny’s Crypto Adventure  29:37 - AD - Bilt - Go to https://joinbilt.com/boyscast to start earning points on rent you already pay 31:13 - AD - Meundies - Go to https://meundies.com/boyscast to get 20% off and free shipping 32:59 - Moonboy Danny’s story cont’d 40:58 - They gayed up Alexander the Great 42:51 - Prison shows / Guy Jail vs. Girl Jail 47:50 - The LA fires 50:50 - Julia Robert’s stance on looting has changed 57:45 - Will Smith 58:11 - AD - Marek Health - Go to https://marekhealth.com/boyscast and use code BOYSCAST to save 10% at checkout 1:00:41 - Celebrities can’t understand why people don’t feel bad for them 1:14:05 - Bill Burr on Kimmel 1:16:25 - Newsom a reptoid? 1:19:26 - Firefighter faux pas 1:21:31 - Prison labor 1:25:59 - Private firefighters 1:29:37 - Goon cave subreddit 1:32:47 - New Slang 1:39:18 - The Cool Tech CEOs 1:46:08 - Bannon tees off on Elon 1:53:51 - DATE - Go to https://ryanlongcomedy.com and https://dannycomedy.com for tickets!  

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to make sure your GoFundMe doesn't leave you homeless when the next disaster strikes. The boys cast What a week What a week What a week TikTok is shutting down Los Angeles is on fire

Palestine might be over Hugh Jackman is divorcing his fat wife What? Yes Not the Jackman The Jackman And if you remember with Hugh Jackman's fat wife His fat gross wife

Right Well that was one of the big things That everyone kept posting Like look at this People talk about You know people care about looks Look at this Jacked

And he was Teed up We know that Hugh Jackman was a drama guy But Then he turned into Wolverine He's walking out here with an 8 pack look at this jacked and he was you know we know that hugh jackman was a drama guy but then he turned into wolverine he's walking out here with an apac and his fat gross old wife was behind him and everyone's kind of saying like oh yeah it's a lot of people kumail nandiani's wife's sweating right now fucking sweating bullets well that's what everyone was saying right because they're kind of like you know a lot of people were saying like, oh, Hugh

Jackman's going to leave her now that he's a jacked man. Yeah. And everyone's like, oh, you don't know what love is. Pierce Brosnan didn't leave his wife. Maybe that's what I'm thinking. Oh, Pierce Brosnan's leaving the wife? I don't know. No, no.

Hugh Jackman's the one leaving, but I think they might both have fat girls' wives. Oh, I don't know. Hold on. Pierce. Pierce. What is it? Brosnan. Brosnan.

Goldeneye. Wife. Because he was the one who took tons of shit and he's like this is my wife of 40 years that's what I'm thinking okay so Hugh

I think the Hugh Jackman okay so that's Pierce you're right it was Brosnan that was taking the heat but Jackman Hugh Jackman was getting some heat as well

I'm looking at a photo of Hugh Jackman's wife she looks like she just aged out she doesn't look no no she's not like no she's I remember Hugh Jackman's wife. She looks like she just aged out. She doesn't look... No, no. She's not like... No.

I remember Hugh Jackman was getting it too. I got a photo of the wife right here. Can we, Johnny, get a photo of her? She's just his age. That's what we're talking about. She committed the cardinal sin of being his age. How about this? What about this photo?

Oh, okay. Yeah, biggest celebrity couple age gaps. No, Jackman was getting heat before too, right? Oh, okay. No, she looks okay there. She's done up there. Yeah, I mean, literally, she looks like she has like staples in her head

that's holding her face. Oh, yes, that's true. So actually, I take it back a bit about Jackman because that's totally fine, but there was a point where she was looking beat and everyone was fucking on Jackman's ass. Looking beat. No, people were on Hugh Jackman's ass about it.

Do you remember that? Johnny remembers it. I didn't imagine this. So Brosnan was getting a two, Jackman was getting a two. When a big A-list celebrity has like a, you know, kind of like a, for a normal mom anywhere else,

it's like you're going to be 40 pounds overweight. That's what they look like. Oh yeah, like dude, slap like a Leafs jersey on both of, and you're like normal Barry Ontario family. Oh, totally. Total normal couple. Nothing wrong with it. But once he started being Wolverine, this guy became a heartthrob.

I know that he's really in his normal life singing and dancing. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. He's doing lots of big things. Yeah, he's walking around the house being like, hello, Jackman's in the building. Oh, yeah. And she's probably annoyed with him. She's just like, fucking, we told you to sing in the garage. That must be tough, though.

It's like if he has like Google alerts set on his name or whatever. And just everyone is just like, this guy should leave his wife. She's gross. And he's like, I love my wife. Yeah, but she's gross. Well, turns out he didn't love her. Turns out it got to them. Well, yeah.

Time beats all i guess right yeah so jackman defeated time is a little bit undefeated so anyways the people have been saying that forever and it finally came to fruition tiktok might be going obviously we're gonna be talking about the fires you know i know that it's a lot's been going on. I got some inside info too. Oh, really? Not very good inside info. Just talk to people in California. Inside scoop right here on The Boys. Guess you're not going to hear it anywhere else. Yeah. From the insiders living there.

The news doesn't want you to tell you this info. I mean, there is one. I said we're talking about TikTok first. Oh, we're talking TikTok. I already got banned from Red Note. Yeah, so. Everyone forgets that Danny's such a fucking bad dude. I know.

Well, I literally made an AI video of Xi Jinping to see, like, wondering what's going to fly on... what's allowed on there. Apparently, you're not allowed to make AI content of the supreme leader of the Chinese Communist Party. They don't have a real sense of humor about that's what happened they go tiktok's out there's this new app and you can't get banned from it and danny looked in the mirror and he goes try me yeah and the problem is is that they're

like well it's all in chinese like that's the craziest part about the number one downloaded app i know it's i downloaded i have a follower yeah you have a follower but it's so insane because like so i basically I posted the video. It got like four views. I posted another video, this Gavin Newsom video. And then all the comments on there are like, we don't understand. How do you understand the comments? Because they're in English.

But then they were like, I don't know. Is it translated? I have no idea. But there was all these comments that are like, good video, but we don't understand this. Yeah. Which I don't understand. Again, because they because they were typing in english i don't know if it like translates or what and then and then so i posted the xi jinping video again knowing that it would nuke my account i just wanted to see how long it would take but at the time you

had the fucking birds up to the world i mean i had i had zero followers, two likes. I was like, it's not a huge loss. Danny walks into his computer room with... That's definitely the soundtrack playing in your head when you're making your AI videos. Two middle fingers up, two birds up. And then after Danny got banned, you started a crypto scam. I did not start a crypto scam. Hawk Danny. Hawk Danny. No, no, no, no. It's not a crypto scam. I did not start a crypto scam. Hawk Danny.

Hawk Danny. No, no, no. It's not a crypto scam. Oh, you're going to talk about the scam after. We'll get to the crypto thing in a moment. I told you there's a lot going on, man. But anyways. It's coming in for me.

She's coming at you right now. There's so many things. I'm going to try to keep the train on the rails, but I don't know, man. Yeah, but anyways. So they say your account's under review. They give you this thing, and there's a status bar, like the Domino's pizza, like delivery thing, which is different from TikTok. It's just basically like we're reviewing the thing.

Yours must've been fucking edging, eh? Well, but it's, yeah, yeah. And then it was stuck at the end for a while as like literally like, it was like someone in an office in Beijing was like, is this cool? Can we allow this? And they're like, probably they had big meetings. Danny's going to be making new merch of his fucking just a screenshot of his bar

just at the breaking through the thermometer but then the thing is it's all like the page like the appear page is all in

that was a joke it's appeal page but appear page appear because that's what they say in China appear

would you like to appear your penalty I'm not a freaking red knot aficionado to know the terms oh come on you know the whole thing with the r's and l's but anyways sure yeah however i'm not not a good joke but uh anyways it's like the whole thing the appeal page it's all in chinese so you're like it just has this whole write-up like which is essentially what TikTok would say, like, would you like to appear? And then it's all in Chinese.

So I'm like, I don't even know. I have a theory that a lot of things are bad because America's turning Chinese. Yeah. And it is funny because- Turning Chinese, turning Chinese. I really think so. Yeah.

And then it is funny. Intellectual property has been, you know, because TikTok became the number one app, intellectual property's gone. Yeah. Andectual property has been, you know, because TikTok became the number one app. Intellectual property is gone. Yeah. And you have a lot of, it's kind of, you know, my theory about how hot girls, when they enter something, it means the culture's over. What happens when Chinese girls enter?

Well, it's actually similar to that theory, but it's sort of at the same time when tech guys enter a culture, you can kind of say it's going to be done. Like if there's like a band that everyone likes and all the tech guys, they're like, we of say it's going to be done like if there's like a band that everyone likes and all the tech guys they're like we love this band they're the best if you notice i feel like that's gonna be over a little bit and i think one of the things is they're very they know how to make product market fit sure but they don't actually know they're not really the product designers as much no and i think one of the reasons is the sort of tech world is very about like open source code

they don't have like the same value of intellectual property they sort of in some ways admire china these guys like elon musk admires china zuckerberg they're a little bit chinese that's why they all get chinese wives in silicon valley sure sure it's not a fully fleshed out theory but i'll tell you what like right now ai in the last like six months the number and especially in the last like few weeks the number of like fake messages from fake accounts have exploded yeah and obviously it's ai but it's feeling very much like we live in china yeah well i mean i said you remember i said you and jj that uh ai chick on instagram and she had a hundred patreon subscribers and she wasn't even a real person it's a a fake person. It's a fake person.

Fucking simps are just like more, please. I'd like to see more, please. And you're like, it's not even a real chick. There's like, it's like some fucking layoff.

My girlfriend, literally a 16 year old in Mumbai. It was just like killing it right now. Making fucking AI, hot AI, white women. That's my girlfriend. You're talking about,

yeah, don't talk about my girlfriend. But the red note, that's funny. Cause you're like, basically racism's cool on there. they love racism but all the gay trans shit is like not okay at all well they just don't want you to even mention it nothing it's they're not like you can't make fun of it they're like i don't want you to mention that it exists but the

problem is is there's all these commies who are like you know tiktok people who are basically like you know low-key crypto commies who are going over there being like, oh, finally a space, but then they're all gay, right? So then they're like, finally like a safe space for us communists. And you go, yeah, yeah, cut the gay shit though. And they're like, what? Yeah, no gay shit though. Like, that's like my whole identity next to being a communist. No, it really is.

It's like commie shit's good. No homo though. No homo. Like that is like the- Pause. Pause. Big time. They should-

Well, that's everyone when comedians go over to china and they're just like oh i want to you know i'm gonna do jokes like one thing you ain't gonna be talking about all that dick you suck yeah yeah definitely tiananmen no tiananmen square did you know that tiananmen square i don't know if that was our chat group or what or i read it somewhere but apparently tiananmen square originally started it's like has a lot of connection to the chinese protest where they're trying to kick out the black guys. Oh, really?

Do you know this, Johnny? If you mind looking this up to see, just confirm what I'm saying. I mean, Tiananmen Square is not a thing that ever happened, so I don't know if that's...

Well, apparently what happened was there was all these pro, there was a lot of like African dudes that were coming through. Uh-huh. In the 80s? Yeah, something like that. And then...

That's probably like five. It wasn't a ton, but they were going to the school. Oh, okay. And they were banging the Chinese ladies. And the Chinese bros were kind of having a problem with this. See, yeah, Nanjiang anti-African protest. Oh, so that's how it started. Well, it's not how it started.

But basically, this became like a big protest movement, right? And there was a lot of guys there basically out there being like no black dick in our chicks right and they were kind of saying like we got to stop getting these guys at our schools all this sort of stuff right and big part of it was that they were smashing the girls and then those guys those two of them literally two this is like it says there's two african students were entering their campus at ho hai university in nangjing with two chinese there's two too many for are entering their campus at Ho Hai University in Nanjing with two Chinese women. Oh, there's too, too many for the Chinese, bro. This is literally like the fucking,

like the anti-segregation shit in America. Right. So apparently the connection is these guys, this became like a pretty big movement. The people were protesting on campus. And then after this protest, you have this big group. They started kind of getting involved

in other movements. And apparently a lot of the people from here were also involved in Tiananmen Square to the point where some of the guys at you know like when you go to a Black Lives Matter rally you're gonna see some trans lives matter signs yeah there's a lot of crossover yeah apparently some of the guys that were protesting you know black guys banging their chicks were holding those signs at Tiananmen Square and there's like pictures of the Tiananmen Square guys uh post with their like signs that were like left over from their last protest so that's the connection I don't know exactly 300 Chinese students spurred by false rumors that a Chinese man had been killed by the Africans broke into and said about destroying the Africans dormitory

shouting slogans well that's different than what I said yeah well no no but it did start with the two the start of it is two Africans and two Chinese women were seen walking together. Okay, so I was kind of right. Yeah. So I'm not, you know, don't take me at exact face value, but there's some connection.

Yeah. And loosely, it was like, they got a taste for protesting and they're just like, well, maybe we're protesting. Yeah, yeah, what else? Yeah, all right, all right. And they go,

what else can we protest? And you go, how about your heavy-handed government? I mean, that's, if you can stop other, if you can stop a whole group of guys from banging your chicks, you're like, we're unstoppable. Yeah, for sure. You're like, what else can we do?

How about independence? Sure. How about no Chinese guys banging our chicks? How about that? How about, yeah, exactly, right? Not the worst. I'll tell you what, they didn't like white guys banging their chicks either. I don't think they were a big fan of anyone else

banging their chicks. They're very much China for the Chinese. Yeah, isn't the Tiananmen Square Hong Kong? No, no. It's in Beijing. No, I've been there. It's in Beijing. What was the Tiananmen Square protest?

In Beijing. Yeah, but what was they protesting against? I think the government. That was the whole thing. It was like anti-government protest. And then there's the whole thing with the tank and the tank apparently ran the guy over and you can't talk about it in china yeah but what was the original thing there but like you're just saying they're protesting the government doing what oh i

don't know i don't know i don't specifically know what they're i don't know if it was like a general government protest if it was like taxes or what specifically um what were they protesting yeah they were the the death of pro-reform chinese yeah it was a the chinese communist party i think they're just protesting communism yeah it's just like basically in in inequality it seems like they were just like you know they had they changed their whole economy or whatever from like a blend on this yeah from like a blended you know they were communists and then they were like blended capitalist communist thing or whatever. And then some people are like,

this isn't, yeah. And they're like, this isn't helping us. There's all these people who are like, kind of getting left behind. Doesn't that sort of line up though? They were hardliners and they're also like, and we're hardliners on people banging our checks. Yeah.

And they wanted, yeah, they wanted, they were calling, they were highly disorganized. Their goals vary. The students called for things like rollback of the removal of iron rice bowl jobs, greater accountability, constitutional due process, democracy, freedom of the removal of iron rice bowl jobs, greater accountability, constitutional due process,

democracy, freedom of the press, freedom of speech. Okay, so there's that. Well, anyways, the amount of women that have been sending me fake messages with zero followers is quadrupled. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

It's out of control. Yeah, I keep getting this message where it's like, hey, you're cute. It's like, message me on my uh my uh backup account so my boyfriend doesn't find out and then i'm just like give me your boyfriend's fucking instagram i need to talk to this guy you fucking whore this is not cool it's not about this shit

hey give me your boyfriend's fucking instagram right now hey message the boyfriend hey girly hey man i got bad news for you. I didn't want to have to. Your girlfriend's got a wandering eye. Honestly, I don't blame her. Obviously, you've seen the Polo Shock. Yeah, I mean, you know. You see how many platforms I've been for you.

You know they like the bad boys, so it is what it is. That's been happening. And then, then Okay so I went on Red Note And basically I saw a lot of Like Ronnie Chang Like Marcelo Yeah It was on there

Like a ton That kind of stuff Like you know Big American celebrities Were kind of popping off Sure But I found like

I found that It sucks because No one's liking my videos But So I think it's broken And it's all in Chinese It's all in Chinese And it's broken

It's hard to use You're like You don't have you can't like just run this through an ai and just convert the language so it's like a little usable like it's like an extra fuck you they go hey like here's they weren't expecting this to happen i guess because uh like zuck went base and then people are because you know you naturally think oh tiktok's done go to the thing that's the most similar to tiktok instagram yeah well exactly they're not gonna be happy when zuck takes the fucking ceo of this company puts him in an arm bar oh dude fucking xi jinping rear naked joke do you know he probably walks in there i do meetings right now he goes feeling a little feminine energy in here i I smell... Assemble my boards. And they put all the boards up.

He's just going... Breaks all the boards. Next week, it's concrete cinder blocks. Fuck around. Now you're ready to negotiate. My final offer to buy the whole kitten caboodle for $300. Anyways, it seems like Trump, though, might be doing an executive order on

Monday. My theory was it feels like Trump wouldn't want this because he doesn't... As much as he does piss everyone off all the time, like, you know, obviously he's a controversial guy. Sure. You could say so. You could say that. You could say he's a bit controversial. Well, my point is I still think in his mind he

likes to... His version of the story is like everything i do everyone loves well that was his main thing because he was the original guy in his first term who said we need to get rid of tiktok because the ccp has all these back doors and has access to all this data and then now he's like i'm pretty popular on tiktok i don't know if we should shut this thing down he's like you said views i get but i also that's literally what he said he goes he goes like i get so many views on tiktok like i don't know if we should shut this thing down everyone's been there man you're just like this fucking absolutely yeah wait till they switch the algorithm on you there donald and that thing will be executive order shut down the next day

definitely but the thing is is like again if they're like you know the people at tiktok they go maybe they're playing fucking kind of 4d chess here and they go dude we like juice his algo so hard like everything goes like extra viral like no restraints on anything no question trump related and then we know that his ego is so big that he'll be like i can't shut this down definitely a good theory yeah and but my point is i think he wanted to bully it where you know they make a deal and it becomes an american company but i don't think if right if right now TikTok's just done and it was like Donald Trump's the guy that ruined the platform and everyone's mad about it, I don't think he likes that. Yeah, he doesn't like that.

But again, this is a Joe Biden thing. This isn't a Donald Trump. Donald Trump will save it, but he's not like this. This will be one of Joe Biden's accomplishments. You're probably right. The news will probably blame it on Biden and not Trump. I mean, well. If it's good, they'll give it to Biden.

If it's bad, they'll blame it on Trump. Right, right, right. Yeah, yeah, yeah. He's got his paws on it, that's for sure. I mean, Biden's taking credit for the Israel-Palestine deals. I know, I've seen that. Joe Biden walks in, he goes, is that a fucking joke? Yeah.

Biden wasn't happy. He gave a little mission accomplished, George Bush. Mission accomplished. No, he definitely wasn't happy. Biden was, because they were just like, you know, does Donald Trump have anything to do with this? He goes, are you fucking... Who?

Donald who? You're going to be fucking kidding me. Yeah, he had a bit of a nod dog energy. New? Yeah, Trump saying it was him. It's all me. I mean, it just conveniently just got kind of wrapped up. Three days before...

And Donald Trump was out there kind of making pretty big threats. I mean, Donald Trump literally had this guy, like, I can't remember what his name is, this guy from New York who's, like, been in Qatar just, like, negotiating this thing on behalf of Trump. So, for, like, weeks now. Yeah, Biden trying not to have that. And Trump is the guy who's, like, if this isn't resolved by the inauguration, he's,

like, there'll be hell to pay and all this stuff. Yeah, and then, lo and behold. Yeah, it's obviously Trump. Biden was not taking a nap the whole time. He woke up, like like one of those guys. What year is it? Palestine's still happening? You go, no. And he goes, good work by me. Good work, yeah.

We did it, gang. We did it. Good work. Anyways, if you guys don't mind, I'm hitting the hay again. Definitely has a nightcap on. I can never get, what are the chances that Joe Biden does not have a nightcap and a lantern? Oh, 100%. He walks around the White House with a lantern, right?

Full Mr. Burns, yeah. I can never get past the fact that he looks exactly like one of Jeff Dunham's dolls. Like the old man, Walter or whatever. He looks exactly like Walter, Like a dead ringer. Let's pull up Walter. Pull up Walter. He looks exactly like... I haven't seen this comparison been made very much,

but he looks exactly like the Jeff Dunham doll. Walter. It's insane. You can throw it. I mean, you can just throw it up. Yeah. But anyways, you can check it out. Jeff Dunham, Walter.

He's struggling. He's on Aukman right now. He kind of does look like that, yeah. Jeff Dunham, Walter. He's on Aukman right now. Kind of does look like that, yeah. Looks like Walter. Walter. Okay, so before we get into it, tell me about the crypto scam. So this is what happened. Not a scam.

Hawk Danny. Hawk Danny. No, no, no. I'm not selling any. That's how bad it was. Because I don't want this to be like... No, no. I know.

Obviously. Okay, I'll basically give the short synopsis i look i was going to sleep last night dude it was and i'm looking at twitter and i'm just watching danny's in a space he's got a new car what the fuck is that the fuck's this weirdo up to now the whole thing was insane ai danny's out of control okay so some of you know some of you don't know or whatever so i do a call i do two call-in shows low value mail the bathhouse uh monday night tuesday night all right so on tuesday night we're doing the bathhouse and this guy this regular caller calls in he's like blacked out drunk okay like he's literally like the drunkest call johnny

right johnny's a producer drunkest call you've ever received he calls in and he starts like rambling and then he was talking about the fires and then he's like he's like could you he wanted to like bet on polymarket on the fires or something like some sort of bet and he goes he's like we should make a token called jew bear and uh it's like the california bear but it's like because the jews set the fires in california and make a token and then i was just like okay like when this is done i'm gonna go on there's this thing called pump dot fun where you can make like a solana meme token in like literally takes one minute right so i go when i go home i'm gonna make this token just whatever right and most tokens like nothing ever happens with them so then i i forget to make the token when i get home on tuesday night and then on wednesday yesterday someone just tweets like just like replies to

something i posted i think it was from a clip from the show and they go hey where's that token and i go basically i was like one minute so i go over to pumped off fun i i go into grok i do the prompt that the guy said it's like because it's like a bear with a yarmulke and a bat or whatever i go and i try to get a grok grok spits out the thing i just pick the photo i make the thing two minutes i buy ten dollars worth of it because when you make a thing on pumped off on it says do you want to buy any you don't have to buy any but i was like i had like this one solana account uh in my wallet i made ten dollars worth and then i just replied to him on twitter i didn't even post it it was just a reply and i go here you go right and then i was like editing some video or whatever i come back like 10 minutes later and and i posted in

the patreon too so in your mind it was like ten dollars for a joke for a joke and i come back like 10 minutes later and and i posted in the patreon too so in your mind it was like 10 for a joke for a joke and i was just like whatever and so i posted in the patreon hey guys like the low value of my patreon i was like hey guys here's here's the token i made it in case anybody wants it i don't know right come back 10 minutes later someone's like the market cap is two million dollars right now and i'm like what the fuck i'm like what are you talking about and i don't know how it happened i have absolutely no clue because again i didn't tweet it i just replied you didn't call people at the jewish head office i didn't call anybody at the jewish head office i did not call like anybody at the central bank nothing did you not say you know hebrews do your thing

no i didn't call a bb nothing none of this and then it just went polish shucks thirsty dude it just went fucking crazy like my twitter like my uh feed was just like like non-stop and i think because there's so many bots in the crypto space so then anytime anything gets posted pumped out fun bots show up and then all these people showed up and then i have like and then it got as high as four million dollar market cap and the whole time this thing is a joke and within four hours it's worth within two hours it's worth four million dollars maybe even one hour but you only own a tiny little part i own yeah yeah like i literally bought ten dollars worth i could have bought like half of it but i i like i'm not even the top 20 owner of this so then naturally the next thing is

you start doing a spaces no no so that everybody's like well here's what happened and then so my my all right guys i'm going to bed hey it's danny the moon boy it's moon boy all right moon you're wearing the ass you're wearing the ass oh yeah i got the full show it's like i changed my profile hey you i'm danny bullshuck i'm going to bed. Yeah, well no, the first thing I did, so what happened is, so then, because you're, my wallet address, my Phantom Solana wallet address,

it's public, right? So then this is what happens when you make a, when a coin pops off on pump.fun, people go and then they make copies of it

because they, essentially they're like scammers. Dude, they're scammers and they want someone to be confused and to buy their coin. So then these they're scammers and they want someone to be confused and to buy their coin so then these people they went and they sent me like two different people made a version of it's called jew bear and then and this is slab shout out shout out runaway slab

this is his idea right this is his uh so then they sent me two different people sent me 500 million tokens of their one but because of the fake one of the fake ones but people were like buying those two right and so then i the first what do they want for you to tweet it i guess because what happened is did you no no no i didn't tweet i didn't know what's going the first thing i did actually is i texted shkreli i go yo what should i do here right and he's just like i'm going to bed right you guys i gotta go to bed like he's like messaging me tomorrow or whatever but i talked to him for like a minute tomorrow you know how much it's gonna happen

in the next two hours good well yeah yeah and then so anyways and then so I went in this space Coffeezilla's fucking gonna have his eyes on you

dude a million dude they made dude they made 10 different tokens of my dog Connor there were 10 different Connor tokens

someone sent me like 500 million Connor tokens they made one of my wife there's a there's a heather token oh my god dude there's like there's literally like they made like all these ones of just like me like there's there's fake there's ones of of my dog that's not even a photo of him but then they found photos of of connor so there's like it's like his photo as the token but anyway someone so so then

they were like i people are like you got to do a spaces there was like a thousand people in it and they were essentially like what do you want i'm like i don't know guys like i literally like i don't know what i made this as a joke and they were like yeah that's like the best thing like the best tokens are just made as like a joke like you're not and i'm like i barely own any of this i made it as a joke they're like can you just say you won't sell it i'm like yeah i'm not so i i went and so i went and they were like go rug all the fake ones because basically what they want to do is they go go rug all the fake ones because that way it'll send them to zero and then take that money and go buy more of your token so i did that i went and bought like you got yourself into i went and bought like five

grand of my token even though i put in ten dollars of it and then i like rugged those two tokens put in took the proceeds which was like five thousand dollars or something you made five thousand dollars off of the fake ones that they gave you that they just so you went from like i'm gonna post this joke to i have five thousand dollars within like an hour so this is the craziest for the people listening at home this is the actual craziest part so i at one point now this is like because it's not liquid so this is not real money but at one point my solano like my solano wallet had 25 in it okay yeah when this started at one point last night it had 130 000 in it what the fuck but it wasn't real because had i sold it like when you go to like rug the coin

like you get like 10 of it uh right because it's not liquid because it sells it all down because it sells it all the way down so it's like it's not actually liquid but in like my solana wallet said how you have 130 grand and then like two minutes later it was like 80 like i lost 50 000 dollars i'm like but i was just like i was totally unaffected by this it was ridiculous and uh so anyways and then they were just like yeah rug the coins put some of the back in into the jew bear i did that because they told me to i guess i don't know i was just like pretend bunny so they're puppets what's happening whatever anyways they got danny dancing man they shoot the floor they tell him to jump danny's crypto community tells him to jump he says how high fellas this is a psa for anyone who rents which is myself and dp included if you

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the outside in so i did this spaces and i was they were like you got to make merch i'm like you guys can make merch. I'm not doing, I'm not making merch. You know who I am? I'm the king of this whole thing. You think that I'm the one who makes merch?

I tell you to make, you tell me to make merch, I tell you to make merch. I'm like, go make merch and make money off of this. Like, I don't care. I mean, I'm actually down quite substantially

on my Juber purchases. I think I'm down like 50. I'm looking right here. Down 50%. But anyways, not financial advice. That's the key thing. I do not need to end up

in some sort of hawk to a situation. If you want to buy it, buy it. I'm not selling it. But you're saying you could see why people get involved in this

fucking ruckus. Dude, I mean, do you know what fart coin is? No. Fart coin was made on Pump.Fun like maybe three months ago. It has like a $1.5 billion market cap right now. Like there's people who have made literally tens of millions of dollars. With this garbage.

From just making fart coin. But the thing is literally 99.9 of the tokens don't do anything or not or worthless like like nothing happens with them they like nobody buys them sometimes you catch a buzz like i can make one right now and and in two minutes like it's just like it's nothing right this is something else and so anyways and so then they were all like we and then i made like uh they were like make a community on twitter like one of those community tabs and like made one and then so i i don't know i'm honestly like i mean you're like kramer walking into this dude

this was so kramer like i was just like the whole thing was the most bizarre shit because i was getting literally it's a world that you've never seen before dude i was getting hundreds and hundreds of messages being like you need to do a space right now like you need to address the community i'm like what community like what is this but there's and then and then on pump.fund because this jew bear coin took off so then like i went on there and like all the new tokens were all just jew related because people are like oh there's money in jews jews a big market right now so then then it was all like, it was like trending on Pumped Out Fun was like Jew token. Like it was the number one trending

like category of token was Jew token. You're always getting involved in something, huh? I made it for the podcast. Remember you're the AI guy. Like it's, no, but it is all like, you always have something cooking. Dude, I literally made this. Wacky dude.

Dude, I like. Well, you know who told me to make it was fucking Bob Sacramento. Bob Sacramento was the one who told me to make it? It was fucking Bob Sacamano. Bob Sacamano was the one who told me to make this one. We got to talk it last night. Me and Bob got to talk it last night. He goes, you got to make a Jubear coin.

So he says it's the next big thing. And maybe it is the next. Maybe it's the next Farcoin. I mean, that will be the absolute hilarious thing. It's just like... Like Crypto King. Three months from now, this has a billion dollar market cap You've started seeing the dollar signs a you're just like maybe It is do fair

Hey again made it as a joke. What a financial advice There were people tweeting at me being like I lost all my money in your coin already Like there's like all these people too. I don't know if it's a joke or not like if people are joking Yeah But then I'm getting like dude i got like one person like a dm being like my dms were like insane right like i had like literally hundreds of dms from random people because you're like the king of this community i guess and then and the thing is with the head bear these tokens the thing is they're normally it's anonymous like nobody knows who made them so this is actually like

a rare thing where people actually know who's the person behind it uh because they're almost always just like someone on so uh but i was getting all these messages being like i lost a bunch of money like could you please send me some tokens or whatever like people are like i lost my i don't again i don't know if this is a joke being like i lost all this money i lost 10k in fucking jew bear people are asking you what the projects with the plan that was like the spaces and so i start the spaces there's like 50 people that want to talk i've never done a twitter spaces before it's the first one i ever did it so then i just let them all in everybody's all talking over each other and i'm like and then i'm like okay i picked some excuse me guys yeah yeah uh do you bear here and

then i picked some like random guy and i was like okay you can like moderate the space and then people were you anointed him i must have been a big day for him i guess and i was from the supreme leader and then dude i picked him and then i'm getting all these dms being like this guy's a fucking scammer don't trust him like dude i got so many things being like i let like this one girl talk and then people like dude she's the worst she's a scammer like everybody they all know each other they're all just like yeah like she's a scammer she's a scammer. Like everybody, they all know each other. They're all just like, yeah, like she's a scammer. She's a scammer. Silence. My children.

Silence. It was one of the more bizarre things. Now, when you were doing this, were you in bed? Were you in a computer chair? I was just in my office. Just my computer chair. Did you have your legs kicked up?

No, I was just sitting there. I was literally like rendering AI videos the whole time just like okay or whatever and then because just like doing it and then but yeah techno yeah they were very much like so your day is this because we both got really sick yeah i barely can move danny i'm sick for the second time in sick for the thrill of the hunt because danny's sickness involves him downloading chinese apps fucking getting kicked off, running crypto tokens, rendering AI videos. You're half man,

half computer at this point. I have my Oculus on the whole time. You really are. I got one porn tab up. I got a fucking NBA game going on. I got NHL in this corner. You're half man, half computer at this point. Basically. Basically, I am. You're one step away from just being a bunch of computer code. I'm essentially soon to be Neuralink

probably. I'm going to get the Neuralink. Yeah, if you're not linked up already. I'm going to get the Neuralink. Which I'm not sure. I'm starting to wonder if the actual real Danny's here. Or you're at home fucking rendering AI and you've got a hologram in the office right now. Oh, that'd be the fucking dream right there. I think I

fucking hologrammed Danny AI in the studio. Half man, half computer. Yeah, but anyways, they were all like what's what's the plans i'm like i don't have any plans i mean this is a joke i'm like i don't know like just i all i did was the only thing i did was i tweet i go hey there's there's all these fake ones don't this is the real one and then but people are like what you got plans for this community i'm like i don't know i don't, I don't know. They're so serious though. Like everybody's like so like,

and they were like, yeah, crypto has been like, meme crypto has been like crappy for the last while because it's all like AI bullshit and everybody's just like trying to scam everyone. But this was like, you know, this was actually like a funny thing and it was like started organically. And I think that's the thing is people like,

it's so hard to start one of these things because everybody's really just trying to do it for money. And I'm like, I wasn't trying to do it for, like I literally was like wasting $10 to do it as a joke just because it was set on my show geez and that's it and then anyways it just fucking popped off and yeah like dude it was like people in the patreon were like this is like a three million dollar market cap right now i'm like how my advice is don't buy it hey he didn't like that no i mean honestly angry honestly danny angry if you buy it expect to lose a hundred percent of the money you put into it yeah absolutely

because because the last thing i mean dude you see the hawk to a thing it's like she's have to go radio silent because she went and fucking like it's just like it's not worth it like people are like oh like dude uh everybody keeps tagging me you know azalea yeah what's she famous from she's a rapper she's a rapper okay so now her new thing is she has like some fucking shit coin that's her new thing she has some shit coin that she's hot only fans for a while she's done she's she's cycled through a lot of different schemes yeah and so now she's on shit meme shit coins or whatever and that's her new thing and you're just like i mean she's literally gonna just extract as much money from this community destroy her reputation at least in crypto and everybody's

gonna be like you're like a scam i mean like look at the shit yeah she doesn't give a shit again i'm not like a fucking i'm not trying to be like a leader of a crypto community too late for that i guess bow down um bow down to your new god of jew bear and everybody's just like yeah it's funny it's just it's a bear and he's jewish yeah i guess i don't know i don't know well i didn't it's literally the most i had a less eventful being sick fucking thing sick podcast i didn't start any i'm gonna make a kramer i didn't start any cults what i yeah i'll tell you what i did do i tried to watch because i was like so fucking sick the whole like the sunday i had to cancel interviews i had to cancel our shows and everything like that and then um i was like okay i'll try to watch something so i tried to watch uh 10 episodes

of alexander the great and i'm like all right let's fucking go this will be all right yeah he's I was like okay I'll try to watch something So I tried to watch 10 episodes of Alexander the Great And I'm like alright let's fucking go This will be alright He's gay He's two minutes in He's fucking French kissing a dude Dude it was nuts I turned it off within two and a half minutes

Because they were like Alexander the Great Was one of the greatest And then they cut to another guy He was one of the most important Cultural figures of our time and then they showed him it's like love dudes and they had him he goes they start he was sword fighting with a guy and then they basically he falls over and he comes up and they like almost kiss and then they and then they go this is like within 45 seconds they almost kissed in a sword yes yes within 45 seconds he's bathing with a guy and the guy comes up from behind him and like

gives him a smooch on the neck and they're like his relationships and then i go fuck off no take no thank you alexander the great was one of the greatest you're like homosexuals that have ever like what dude these people can't help themselves they just want to rewrite history i know it's ridiculous that's why we're lucky that everything's on video that we're doing in a thousand years from now they're not gonna be able to rewrite this guy had three different wives and before they even mentioned a single wife they had him fucking frolicking around the field naked with a guy these people need to be taken their history degrees need to be taken away man yeah the only thing i watch right now is um uh 60 days in what's that that's where

regular people go to jail oh yeah well that's what i did i turned on to i will world's worst prisons yeah it is it is 60 days in is really funny though because they do the guy's jail and the girl's jail and the guy's jail like because you know the whole thing where like people pretend to be trans to go to the girl's jail yeah dude dude literally the girls jail is like a fucking uh sleepover like they're just like all like laughing and they're giggling and laughing and laughing and they're like doing crafts i'm sure they're fighting most of the time they're arguing they're arguing yes but there's no nothing not as much physical fighting the guy one is everybody getting the shit kicked out of them you get turned into a weight. You see what happens if you do it wrong.

Next thing you know, you're the guy's weight. People getting extorted. Anthony, I was talking, we have a chat group with all the boys. Yeah. And this one guy went to jail and he was like, yeah, we had, when I went to jail, like we had an Indian dude that we used to use as our weights. Yeah. Dude, literally like this one guy.

You just go to jail and you're like, am I going to get fucked? You're like, actually, I don't know, maybe worse. You like actually i don't know maybe worse you basically become a bench press bar bench press bar but like this one guy who was uh he was um he was a security guard but he's like i want to be like a corrections officer that's my dream so i'm gonna go to jail for 60 days and they make this whole like backstory for them and everything so they can like not get in trouble or whatever and then this guy was like i was like heavily bullied when i was in high school and like you know it really took a toll on me so i'm hoping like um you know i'll like learn something about being in jail and hopefully like this won't happen here and then like instantly like he's just like getting extorted

like dude they're he's getting extorted like he's doing his commissary buying stuff some guy just like walks over to him some big like dude he's like yeah give me like two bags of chips or whatever yeah and then and then they're like then this one crazy guy comes he's like laying on his bunk and this one crazy guy comes just starts fucking feeding him punches for no reason so then and he's like i only have like one buddy in here and like this one guy and like he's like the only guy i can really talk to and then that guy's like you know if you give me money i'll protect you so then you're like this guy's just getting like literally like the fish treatment across the board it was to the point where he's just like they get they have like a code word where if they say the code word because there's a documentary

crew going around that's like part of it so then if you say this like code word like i want a cup of hot coffee or something then they fucking yankee out of there and that's like the end of it oh so the documentary crew kind of having to get out of there well i would have to like because people would have to like get bailed out because they were like i fear for my life but this whole guy was just like you know i was i was bullied heavily so i hope it's not the case here and then like literally like you just have that someone's bitch within you have that demeanor where you're like you're getting the shit kicked out of you like and he's not like causing problems like he's keeping to himself he's like getting extorted kicked out of you like and he's not like causing problems like he's keeping to himself he's like getting extorted beat up like just the works like everything the whole thing is so crib it's good

show that sounds like pretty good show pretty solid you don't have to deal and but anyways the main point is that the guy's side tons of violence like like you know shanks everything the girl's side just a fun time you are a fucking idiot especially if you transition you know what i mean that's what i'm saying but you are getting your dick sucked dude you're an absolute fucking mark if you can just say i'm a chick i want to go to the chick prison if that's on the table for you you don't take that you're forget about it whatever she takes some hormones who gives a shit who gives a shit you probably don't even take him pretend you're taking him that was the big thing with it actually is that they would go take the pills and then they would like- Spit them out.

Spit them out and crush them up and stuff or trade them and all this stuff. So they're like, yeah, you can just not even take them. Yeah, exactly. All you got to do is do some makeup and maybe grow your hair out. I put lipstick on once a week. That's it. And you're having a fun sleepover with a bunch of chicks. Some of them aren't even gross.

Some of them are kind of hot. Some of these jails, though, honestly, if you are a mark bitch yes it would be better to be in the women's prison but like some prisons if you're not a bitch and you get past the original thing and it's pretty minimum security there's a lot you're playing cards with the boys you're playing tennis like that's not some of it's like some of these guys it doesn't sound the worst yeah if you're playing tennis. Like that's not, some of it's like, some of these guys, it doesn't sound the worst. Yeah, if you're in like a super, like a minimum security, like camp or whatever kind of thing. Because again,

after five years of just gossiping with the ladies, you might. Sure. Yeah, you might be like, this is a, this is a different prison in and of itself. This is like double jail.

I got to talk to fucking chicks all day. So yeah, I could understand that. But I'm saying if you're like you know like like they don't uh in the prison jail if you're like a sex offender like there's no whole thing where you're like yeah you get killed if in the male side if you're a sex offender it's like the chicks don't do that no no no no and the opposite yeah like i mean that would be terrible if you did go to the girl's side and you're getting everyone's bitch in the girl's side that's a thing that's a real that's the lowest i mean half of the chicks in there are just former teachers who fucked their students they're all sex offenders too it's like probably the most common thing i don't know some

300 pound latino chick gangster that's just like fucking time to pay the piper pal yeah you might yeah i'm gonna be the best so los angeles yeah los angeles lots been going on obviously i think the fires are done no but i'm it was just happening as we recorded our episode last year last week i know i know and then just like my buddy who lives there who works in the industry he was like he's big on the looting stuff and he was kind of like he's a looter yeah he's been huge on looting he's been looting no he goes he's like one of the biggest things that happening is he goes uh a lot of the fake fires now he said people are starting them absolutely so they could do more looting yeah yeah there's because i mean he said they're dressing up like firefighters he said yeah a lot of crazy they've arrested multiple people for arson oh yeah yeah yeah multiple people have been right i mean huberman literally huberman posted something

last week where he was just like driving down the street and he's just like hey there's people lighting a fire right here yeah no yeah so i've been i was thinking if i lost everything in like a fire because uh you know you know, there's that, there's a lot of people, um, you know, posting like, Oh,

I'm not going to, I'm going to get my money back, but there's so many things. And I was kind of thinking, do I have anything that would really like mess me up that I lost? And I was like, honestly, just probably maybe my hard drives would be a pain in the ass.

Yeah. Just all the CP on there. But I can't place that shit. But I was kind of thinking, I was just like i don't yeah i don't i don't think we had that exact conversation i mean when i moved here i kind of just put everything in a storage locker and went back once and i had it's all sitting there everything i own and you've realized in a storage locker in toronto and it's been five years it's become a burden he's going i'm paying for garbage to store garbage that i don't even want right like maybe one day in the near future i'll be like yeah you know what i really did need that svga cable that's been in my sure my storage for 12 every now and then you want a cable but you're like

it's easier to buy a new cable for sure so i don't know if anything would really i think i could lose everything in like within a week be kind of back up and running normally the only really annoying thing would be just having to be like i gotta go just like it's like you're going to college oh my god like shopping i'm not saying it wouldn't be a hassle but i'm saying that some people are like all my photo albums and all this stuff that they well you know what the big thing you know the irreplaceable stuff well you know i'm just like i don't i don't think i have anything that i couldn't like well because obviously you don't have a giant nomad well you don't have a giant collection of hunter biden's artwork so right dude hunter biden is fucking making out like a bandit right now because he lost 40 paintings oh and they probably got valued

they got valued when joe under under a joe biden presidency not under a donald trump presidency because under uh so this guy's gonna be getting paid out for a bunch of finger paintings. Oh, dude, made of shit. Literally made of shit human feces that are probably like valued at 500 grand a pop. Dude, there's so many people. I saw Bill Ackman tweet about this where basically like,

there's a lot of people who have like, because like a $10 million home, but they have like a $500 million art collection in their home. Yeah. Right? So it's like the insurers are, you know,

they can be like, some people are getting, some people are going to get these. And the thing is, you know, if you have like a crazy art collection and the fires are coming, like you can't really just take them all with you. Like that's hard.

Like how you could take, take your favorite one. You almost don't want to because the insurance payouts can be more than you can, you know, to sell them the percentages you're paying commissions to sell them. Oh, all that stuff.

But I mean, again, the insurance companies notoriously like look for any loophole and they're to sell them, the percentages you're paying, the commissions to sell them. Oh, all that stuff. But I mean, again, the insurance companies notoriously like look for any loophole to not pay you. Well, they're not begging to give you money. Yeah, like good luck collecting. But, you know, I'm sure a lot of people had these like massive art collections

that just like went up in flames. Well, my favorite, Julia Roberts was probably the most interesting one to me recently and I got a whole bunch. But so Julia Roberts slams looters amid LA fires. Fuck you to criminals exploiting chaos

and Julia Roberts wasn't happy with people looting her house. This time. Well the thing is I'm going to have to go ahead and disagree with you Danny because this is what happened. Julia Roberts is on record being really against looting. She may or may not have tried to stop the bill that was preventing looting.

That wasn't Celebrity's Houses, Danny. Yes, if you want to loot Joe Blow's bakery, go loot Compton. Get all the copper pipes in Compton. Loot Compton. Loot Joe Blow's convenience store that he wants to start on the side. She has her Oscars there. I don't know if you know the difference between a nobody and an important person.

I mean, what people don't really realize too is when you win an Oscar, they charge you like a thousand bucks to actually get it. There you go. Right, so that's money. It's money in the bank,

the sentimental value. She has actually important stuff there. And on top of that, the people that are doing the looting, this woman's in your corner. She's pro-looting. She goes, everywhere else, just not here. I don't know. If anything, they're biting the people that are doing the looting this woman's in your corner she's pro-looting she goes everywhere else just not here i don't know if anything they're biting the hand kind of kind of it's ungrateful i mean watch these looting laws get changed all of a sudden after the rich

people get affected by it they go you know what maybe looting is not the best thing loot minneapolis yes burn the city down loot a cold city this is hollywood we actually it's like they don't understand the concept the difference between uh people that are important and people that are not sure someone needs to beat them someone needs to like maybe beat that over their fucking poor head maybe with an oscar with someone beat them down with that shove it in their ass and aaron brockovich oscar right up the ass yeah so i honestly i want to say the looters if you're obviously you're not going to loot a famous person's house no she's on she's the only one that has looters backs i know i know well she did not in her backyard she did have their backs and then they came for her and now she's

not a big fan of looting. I get the idea. The question is, are these dumbasses going to re-elect the people who are in charge right now? Yes. Because they will, right? Her brain is made of mashed potatoes. Do these people... I mean, it's the same person that's like, you take the subway once, and you're just like, they need to do something about these subways. And then you don't take it for another year, and you're just like, put more people on the subways.

Get rid of these cops. Right. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, I'm so sorry that you had to be on a subway with a man that was holding a knife with blood. Dude, she probably got a call from her agent after that being like,

hey, can you maybe take that down or retract that statement? That's not going to be good for your career, saying you don't like looters. That's true, yeah. We're sort of a looter group here. He he goes we're in negotiations for a new film and if you come out as anti-looting we're sort of a looting cost us yeah our business our business brand is very pro looting would you maybe amend that statement to say that you don't like the treatment of the

looters literally like a pr crisis at her agency because they're like oh my god she said she's against looting oh my god are you out of your fucking mind they have like the crisis team in like what do we do what do we do it is out of control it's one of those things too she probably it's not just with this is probably like you know it's like uh you hear people playing their music too loud she's probably would be against any bill of like you know people shouldn their music too loud. She probably would be against any bill of like, you know, people should be playing music at 4am outside your house. Yeah, I know. If anyone was playing music outside of her house at 4am.

Like a mandatory headphone bill. Oh, she'd sick the dogs on them. So this is, but they're not like, understand, you're like, lady, you've been out here pro-looting. You voted for this. But it's more like understand you're like lady you've been you've been out here yeah you voted you voted for this but it's more than voted for it she's campaigned yeah she's actively campaigned for it

yeah i want to know what she was the one who made the trump wives video too do you remember that oh really she was the voice on the like if you're voting for if you're a woman like don't tell your husband you're voting for trump she was the voice that narrated that. This is a post that she posted. She goes, I realize I have privilege because I can sell my CDs without being shot. I can play music without being shot. And then she had like a brackets of like a name of a black person that had that happen to them. I can go to church without being shot.

I can shop at Walmart. Julia Roberts. By the way, that's insane because that's your privilege. I don't know if you've been to Walmart, but I don't see a lot of privilege cooking around those aisles. Have you ever had that fantasy if you're ever on the subway and there's someone playing a speaker, and then in your mind you're just like, I'm going to fucking say something to them. I'm going to be that guy.

I'm going to be that guy. I'm going to go up to them and go, hey, buddy, a lot of people on the subway. Turn your speaker down. Somebody did that last week and got stabbed. Yeah. Some guy. I told you. Some guy was

playing his speaker and then some guy was just like fed up and goes, hey buddy. I'm saying something. I'm saying something. And he goes, ow, he stabbed me. I'm up in front of the deal. Okay, you play your music. Okay, I'm sorry. Why do you keep stabbing me?

It's just so loud. I told you. I had the guys. It's so inconsiderate. Dude, you feel like a bitch too because if you're like a grown man and there's a bunch of like 17-year-olds but there's nine of them and you're just like, do I have to get beat up by 17-year-olds?

You know what I mean? Well, I told you what happened to me is they were on the subway. Johnny was there. We were fucking out there. The kid puked. Yeah, they're yelling and screaming and everyone,

the most you can do, hooting and hollering, hooting and hollering, the most you can do hooting and holler hooting and holler the most you could do is catch the eye of someone else and give them a look of like can you believe this yeah that's the that's the best you can do it'd be like if you look at them he goes man if there was nine of us we might we might be able to say something well you look at a guy and then you go you go you give him like a roll your eyes like can you believe this and he goes why are you rolling your eyes he rolled rolled his eyes. He rolled his eyes. He rolled his eyes.

He rolled his eyes. Get him. Get him. Well, anyways, I'm fucking sure. That's what we're doing. Then they got pukes on me. Fucking out of control, man.

Yeah. But anyways. Julia Roberts would be yelling at me for getting, well, maybe you shouldn't have been the line of puke. Julia Slobberts. Yeah.

But that's what happens when you stand, if you ever decide to be like, hey, can you turn your speaker down? It's inconsiderate. Youiderate you get stabbed yeah like that was the first guy to try that unsuccessful oh for what yes on the topic of celebrities slight divergence here but i've been talking a lot about my favorite will smith line first in it last one out the club and i finally found it again okay and the line goes first in it last one out of the club

bursting in passing out at the club So not only Does I don't want to do a sketch About this but First in it Last one out of the club So he's the first guy there Not cool

Not traditionally a cool thing to say That's what you say When you hear the first line You're like You're the last one there That's weird But then he reveals That it's because he passed out

At the club Oh because he accidentally Gave himself the roofies He mixed up which cup was which? Possibly. Or it might have been the cup thing. Or it was a ruse that he pretended to pass out so he'd get a few extra club minutes.

Oh, okay. It's last call and he's just like... Fellas, I've been telling you about Merrick Health. Danny's been telling you about Merrick Health. And one thing you should probably know, insurance companies regularly deny progressive treatment options. Primary care physicians refuse to order

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And I was like, oh, I thought this and this. And he was like, no, that's like a scam. And he was like, they don I thought this and this, and he was like, no, that's like a scam. And he was like, they don't tell you the, you know? No, I mean, there's a lot of misinformation out there.

There's so much stuff. Tons, tons. Yeah, I was even going to do a sketch about when you try to, when you invent an actual cure and then the pharmaceutical

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see like am I doing any you know I find that's the best one. So the sooner you do it the sooner you can compare it to. Absolutely it's the only way you can really measure things. Right so that's why the boys cast we both been on Merrick. They got expedited onboarding for those who are interested in working with a Merrick Health

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includes the same elaborate panel that me and Danny have both done. And with those test results, the Merrick Health clinical team optimizes my personal protocol to get the exact same panel and medical oversight so click the link in the video description which is merrickhealth.com slash boys cast use the code boys cast and you're gonna get 10 off at checkout they gotta drag them out yeah just so you can get a little more action you know what i was kind of thinking about the you know when i because there's

a lot of you know people were kind of posting a lot of it's in poor taste with the gofundmes and i think a lot of celebrities you know when the insurance ceo got killed i remember that you remember that yeah and there was a bit of i think you might have made a point where you're like it's news to them finding out people hate them sort of thing yeah i think that hollywood celebrities often go through this as well. Yeah. Where they're just like, but I'm beloved. Right.

Also, and in their defense, which a lot of people don't realize, is you're like, some Hollywood celebrity is doing a GoFundMe. You're like, they haven't worked in 10 years. Like, you remember them from a thing they did 10 years ago. They're like, they haven't made any. They're not actually rich. Some of them, I know people. Some of them are.

I've had people that I know in Los Angeles that have told me, because I've been chatting with people, and they've been saying like, yeah, my buddy who probably makes like a million a year posted a GoFundMe and everyone's trying to- Yeah, that's crazy. Roll their eyes out. I saw some, did you see Eddie Griffin? I didn't know Eddie Griffin was like a super MAGA guy. Eddie Griffin?

I know Eddie Griffin. I remember him and his- Deuce Bigelowow kid or whatever used to come around toronto okay so eddie griffin he's a huge hit on girl he's a huge mega guy and he has like a mega like basically like a steve bannon war room type podcast which i did not know that it's like insane he literally said so he's like an old head dude he basically said that the fires were started by pedophiles to burn all the evidence let's go yeah he's a mega base but then he posted some photo and he's just like on a private jet and you're like damn it's like you were fucking flying private like it was getting paid he was getting paid but he hasn't done i mean he does he still tour a stand-up and he probably sells tons of

tickets but you're like you haven't done anything in 10 years i guarantee you selling ticks oh it's big time he's and he's doing like casino gigs where like you know they're getting really paid but you're like yeah but he's a comedian so he can still make money off of that but you're like a lot of these people you know like the i'm sure there's there's all different i mean when something like this happens there's all the different things going on yeah yeah so that's why i kind of have like a mixed feelings about all the different things you know i've felt all the different things where i felt bad for people then you cut you know sure but i mean it sucks regardless of how much money you have duh house but it also is like of course you know like like mel gibson was on rogan

and he's like i don't know what's in this house is currently burning down it's fucked yeah and you're like again and also it feels like close where it's like it feels kind of a little like new york where i'm like dude i like i talked to none of my friends it seemed like carola was kind of like in the thick of it i know those you know one that i know super well had was like properly affected those d you know those maybe you don't know them but these two djs the ec twins yeah uh those guys they had to like evacuate shout out to them because i was talking to them and they had to like evacuate their place and they were basically like we literally our whole savings is just like in this house we have like nothing other dude it's essentially like house poor well if you're insured then you're insured well no they

were like they were in that scenario where their insurance got dropped and then oh uh they because the thing is is like everybody you know why the insurances got dropped by the way because of the government basically they basically said like hey you're you're not allowed to charge this much for insurance and then they were like well we'll lose money if we do that. And then they were just like, well, you should. Yeah, you should.

And then every insurance company was like, you can't force us to like operate in a area. So then insurance companies left. Prices went up. And they were like, Hey, we want to buy insurance. But like,

they're just like, well, they're not, and you're not letting us money. And they're like, yeah, they can't provide it, which is like,

it's just like a fucking, and also like mismanagement was right. And left. But like the main thing is like, you know know the values of these homes like doubled in a short period of time so you're like yeah the well if the insurance obviously should reflect the current value of your home so then they're like yeah we need to raise insurance rates because your value your place doubled in value yeah double right like your place doubled in value in five years so you're like yeah we have to raise your insurance rates and then the state was like you're not allowed to and all they're end up good

at doing is because they they have this like i mean it's literally the like bread lines meme yeah where you're just like okay uh that's an you know you'll hear it about like argentina when inflation was really bad they're just like that's not true like uh bread is actually only a dollar for like two loaves and you're like where can you can you buy that? And you're like, well, no one will sell it. You can't buy it anywhere, but that's how much it costs. That's how much it costs. Right.

Yeah. Yeah. But like the, essentially the state goes, Hey, if you can't get insurance because of us, essentially they did this like thing called like the care. It's like a California,

like insurance thing for fire, but they only had two million, $200 million in it. So it's going to run out instantly. It's like fucking three houses in the palace. Yeah. It's it's like nothing and then so what's essentially going to happen is they can step in and essentially say like you know what we're going to just like go city bank style and just bail out bail out the everybody and then all that's going to happen is that they're going to socialize all the losses amongst all the california residents so if you're paying you

live in sacramento and you're now paying because gavin newsom wouldn't allow you're not allowed to charge that guy uh everyone's gonna pay for that 200 million dollar don't you love living in california california knows how to spend knows how to fuck yeah so it's like crazy because you're like yeah okay great that's right and those people probably like would have bought insurance. You know what? Back to the Julia Roberts thing, I felt like with a lot of the celebrities in general,

one of the mistakes that they make when they pick their causes, this is how you end up in this situation where you are inevitably a hypocrite, is they need to pick a cause, right? So I'm not going to tell these... First off, no, they don't. What's the Sandman's cause? No, no, this is... I'm not going to tell these... First off, no, they don't. What's the Sandman's cause? I'm not going to tell these A-list actresses

that no cause... You know, you got to pick baby steps, Dan. Sure, sure, sure. You're going to show up and you're going to... First things first, no cause. It should go, you're fired. I would say... So if I'm a consultant here,

I'm with you. I know obviously you need a cause. I'm not an idiot. Yes, what are you going to be? Some you i know you obviously you need a cause i'm not an idiot yes of course what are you gonna be some psycho without a cause you need a cause but the problem is they the ones who do it right pick causes that end so for example her cause is like racial equality you know who did it really good john stewart has a cause the firefighters from 9-11 getting more stuff this is my one thing that i want them to you know yeah and then it gets it or something or even kim kardashian was like i need one thing that I want them to, you know, and then it gets it.

Even Kim Kardashian was like, I need these three guys I want them out of jail. You have a specific cause. You seem like you're doing the exact amount of stuff, but you have your cause. You have a defined success. You can't have these broad,

vague causes that will never end. Yeah, and racism. I mean, I always, you know, to be honest, Palestine, you're like, I'm a know to be honest palestine you're like i'm a palestine guy at some point you're not going to want to put as much energy into this as you do now and then 10 years from now when things are exactly the same uh-huh maybe not as much actual bombing but maybe five years ago and then they go wasn't this your whole thing and they go

i'm not that anymore you go did it get solved no so why aren't you then like racial equality you never get to be like well i did it like john stewart gets to be like we did it yeah yeah you go your cause you go i yeah and it was successful like you need something that has an end to it sure or else it's inevitable that you'll look like a hypocrite yeah you can't have it and also again like there's really no reason no real bet i mean there is a benefit i was gonna say there's no benefit but there is a benefit temporarily for backing these causes because it actually does support your career like you know if you're this vocal like racism's bad you know you get a little bump you kind of thing but then you get caught in these contradictory

things and then it just unless you're like entire life forever is this yeah yeah yeah but then you can't come out against luton you definitely can't come out against Luton. You definitely can't come out against Luton. Who's doing the loot? But that's what I mean. She probably forgot that. She was like, oh, right. Six years ago, my entire identity was looting's great.

Yeah. Like, you know, she's moved on. You go, well, the thing still exists. Yeah, we still remember. How is this not? Why? So, oh, you go, I grew out of it? You were 38.

You were probably, what, 50 when she started it? Yeah. Yeah. No, that's a good point. Yeah. So I think if i was them i would be you gotta pick you gotta go specific with your car all you do is you just post a fucking red cross link for california now we're talking move on with your life yes just be like i'll match donations up to 10 grand here's a red cross link i'm the good guy i was like at first i was, I did feel it a little bit where with stuff like this, I mean, I have a bit of a love hate relationship with LA, but I do, uh, I did feel like I was

like, oh fuck. I hope no. And like, that would fucking suck if someone, you know, lost it. Like I did actually, and people I talked to were like, it's like mayhem out here. We only know poors. Kind of though. We know some, we know some agents, managers, managers, and a bunch of comedians that have money. I wonder what the tone on the ground was

in Compton. He said it's nuts. Well, no, I'm just saying, because they were completely unaffected. They don't have trees and stuff around them like they do. I think it's business as usual in some places. Yeah, it's business as usual. They're probably like, fuck, man. If I think of things, the one thing I probably like

about LA is, and i'm not talking about just like i think that people don't when a lot of people when they only think of new york and la they think of it like from a um like just only the politics but i the thing i think i like even probably compared to uh other places including new york is the they have a go-getter mentality over there two things la has a lot of people that have gotten really rich and do nothing. There's a lot of people in Los Angeles that live in the hills,

have probably a net worth of $7 million. You're like, what do you do? And you're like, I don't know. Mostly go to lunches. There's a lot of people that have figured out. Deal makers. Yeah, they kind of beat the game. Yeah.

So I think LA has a lot of that. And because of that, they have a very anything's possible mentality. I think la has a lot of that and because of that they have a very like anything's possible mentality i think there's a lot of like go-getters there there's a little it's gonna get a little negative in new york yeah and then in you know smaller places it has that energy of like oh you think you're gonna be so i i think there's like a a youthful positivity about los angeles that i kind of enjoy they're all vitamin d'd up so they're feeling good they're all vitamin d'd up so yes there's that and. They're all vitamin D'd up, so yes.

There's that. And then, you know, then there's the other part. You kind of, you know, turn on the TV and you see Jimmy Kimmel balling his eyes out again and you're just like, yeah, that's, you know. That's if it checks out. There's my hate part. There's the hate part. And Julia Roberts, you're like, oh, right.

Like fucking what comes with, you know know what comes with that go-getter energy is kind of like an energy of like oh i can i can save the world in an afternoon yeah and then you know and do all these you know promote all these things that are going to make everyone's life work but it'll help my career a tiny little bit in some some way and i can feel better about myself and it'll actually make the world worse and then i can move on with my day and with the destruction of my past there's some of that energy. And it'd be nice if some of them,

because at least here, like, you know, when the leaders, like, fuck up, you know, on both sides of the aisle, it seems like people will be like,

it's a more cynical place. Yeah, people will be like, yeah, yeah, that was like, I voted for that guy, but he did something wrong and, you know, he could have done that better.

Whereas there, Julia Roberts is like, Gavin Newsom's never done anything bad. He's perfect. Yeah, yeah. He's a perfect governor. They're living in a fantasy world a bit out there, right? Quite literally.. He's perfect. Yeah, yeah. He's a perfect governor. They're living in a fantasy world a bit out there, right?

Quite literally. Where it's more cynical out here. But there's a, you know, there's some, it's nice to have an energy of like positivity sometimes. Whereas New York's a little bit like every, you know, everything sucks, you know. Yeah. It's a dark energy. It's obviously better for.

But then LA has the other side of it that they're dark energy which is like you walk around the streets and you feel ghosts right yeah you know what i mean yeah and just literally crazy well no there's probably crazies everywhere but they're they're not lighting you on fire i hope the fires are happy they made jimmy kimmel cry again though that's god's up there it's crazy that he didn't have enough tears to put out the fires like that wasn't like a i was wondering do you think that was like a plan to go Jimmy Kimmel cry again, though. God's up there. It's crazy that he didn't have enough tears to put out the fires.

Like, that wasn't like a... That's an actual strategy. Do you think that was like a plan to go, fuck, the reservoir's out. To go, what can we do? We need water. You go, I got an idea. Tell Jimmy Kimmel there's racism happening. Just, we'll suspend...

We need water. We'll suspend him from a helicopter. He can deliver his monologue... We need water. ...over the fires, and he just starts bawling and just puts the whole thing out. Yeah. By God, it worked. Kimmel! monologue over the fires and he just starts bawling and just puts the whole thing out yeah

by god it worked kim all i was thinking that that's what hell looks like is you go to hell and then in your mind you're just like oh i guess i'm gonna be like burned for eternity but really what happens they put you in a room and you have like a here's here's your day you got three hours of watching just screens everywhere jimmy kimmel crying then three hours of jimmy phil fallon laughing and then you have three hours of uh stephen colbert scolding yeah no you're in the studio and then seth meyer is just not doing whatever the fuck seth meyer does it's not even the screens as you're in the studio audience having to watch that's what hell is yeah that's what hell is and jimmy jimmy fallon's just laughing the whole time you know kimmel's crying.

Colbert's waging his finger in your face. The Costco guys are the guests on every show. Every episode you go, Costco guys again, huh? Do you guys ever have any other guests? Is Brad Pitt or Leo not available? Can I get to Brad? I'm kind of done with the boom meter.

I'm not going to lie. All right, Danny Bush. And you're the only guy, so you have to hear the boom. Yeah, you're the only guy. Everybody reach under your chair. You have a double chunk chocolate cookie. You go, I don't want another double chunk chocolate cookie. The devil prods you if you don't clap enough for the boom. Danny, we can't hear you.

Boom. Boom. Hey, no crying. That's for Kimmel. boom boom your arm is just so jacked from constantly doing boom you just have one giant arm boom I think that's what hell is yeah that sounds about right so if the Costco guys are not going straight to hell then exactly I don't know anything uh Bill Burr went on Kimmel when I guess the day Kimmel was crying. But Bill Burr,

I guess he's sort of had a controversy because he sort of came out. He has a new special coming out. And he basically, Kimmel exactly. He's very much like do not second guess

any professionals or whatever. You know what I summed it up as? Bill Burr is kind of like an old union man energy. Sure. You know what I mean? Yeah. So he's always like, whenever it up as? Bill Burr's kind of like an old union man energy. Sure. You know what I mean? Yeah. So he's always like,

whenever it's like a corporation, he's kind of like, you know, these are evil corporations. But when it's the government, he's got sort of a, they're doing their best. Yeah.

He's got grace with the government and no grace with corporations. I think that's like a union man energy. I mean, the problem with the Bill Burr thing. Old school, like New Jersey union man.

Yeah. And again, he is like obviously one of the funniest comedians. But the problem is, is he did this exact shtick with like don't question the authorities he's done it during covid and you're like but you've been proven wrong now i guess like in hindsight like you were proven wrong that like yeah they did and like again like what's your point like they can't

make mistakes they shouldn't be held accountable i think i guess the point is they're doing their best but when corporations do it they're're evil, sort of, right? Yeah, but I mean, again, this is like, I don't know. Like I've said it before, but like, yo, if you put the fucking insurance CEOs in charge of, like again, an insurance CEO would never be the governor of California because it's a massive step down for them. Like they make $50 million a year versus like whatever, 300K.

But you're like, you put the insurance CEOo as as the governor of california the fires things in and if you put the governor if you put the mayor of los angeles in charge of the insurance company bankrupt dying yeah like literally everybody's dying the thing goes bankrupt completely belly up like everybody loses their money like we're you know but again the incentive structure is wrong but like i mean i agree with bill burr where he's like yeah you know a helicopter pilot can't fly in 100-mile-an-hour winds at night. Sure. The 100-mile-an-hour wind thing was something where people were like, why can't they? And you're like, yeah, they can't fly in 100-mile-an-hour winds.

A helicopter is just like, maybe there's some, but not the ones they had or whatever. And this is like a rare thing. But you're like, there could have been some things. Surely they did better. Well, they could have prepared prepare for this you have fire season every year it's called fire season like it's literally called fire well i mean a lot of people have made very compelling you know uh evidence-based you know uh cases about uh what has been what were the obvious things where you're just like this was a a mess. This was a mess. You know, why didn't you have water? And most of it seems pretty true.

For sure. Where you're just like, yeah, there's also lots of people that do know what they're talking about that have made the case that, yeah, California. Like, I don't think it takes a crazy leap to be like California's mismanaged because they are everywhere. Yeah, exactly. And you're like, you know, they say the water pressure ran out they're like no we had water but we were all using it at once that's why the fire hydrants were dry and you're like is it impossible to

solve that problem like is that an impossible problem to solve or did you just like not think about it they're like well we have bigger problems to solve and you're like what and you're just like we're trying to make it well we're trying to make looting easier to do yeah you're like yeah we're trying to abolish racism okay but like again you're just like was this an impossible problem to solve is it like newsom's weasel number one when people talk about like the lizard people he probably is the most that i guess some of the older politicians like the mitch mcconnelly types when get old enough, they start to actually look like a lizard, too. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So they have a bit more lizard-y characteristics.

But I say of young guys, he looks the most like Men in Black style, like wearing a body, but he's like a creature. Yeah, yeah, yeah, for sure. Dude, he does. 100% seems like he finishes those speeches, walks, and then zips off his Newsom suit. Oh, that thing suffocated me. He's cold-blooded, right? He's a fucking reptile. He's the most, you know.

Yeah, but he had this one interview. I posted it on my Twitter, but he was interviewed on MSNBC, and it's like, watch it with the sound off. His body, it looks like he's signing. His body language is so insane. Interesting. He does every fucking,

it's kind of like the Obama shit, but it's so aggressive like the amount he's like he's constantly like his arms are literally he's on the move whole interview constantly moving and he's just like doing this and like is he hypnotizing people is that what it kind of is maybe i mean it's not working but uh it's working on some people it literally i wanted to like do a thing where like you put him in a circle, like a sign. You almost have to respect a little bit in the white men are bad era. He was able to be a standard rich Martha's Vineyard white guy and somehow be like- Everybody loves him.

On that side, you know what I mean? Yeah. I mean, he is like if you made a politician in a lab. 1,000%. That's the guy you need. He's what trudeau wants to be absolutely yeah yeah like he's so polished like every single thing like but it's like dude the hand movements and everything are like just mental you could tell he things bounce off him you could say like you know to his face like you this and that these people are dead he'll just be like yeah he knows how to like he'd probably be like an incredible words mean like cold like a cold calling sure like he would be

like the best at that yeah yeah because you anything you say to him he has like any rebuttal he's just like he's got something for you that was that was probably one of the crazier things and funnier things was the when people got booked like being influencers like there's the guy he has his shirt off and he's like flexing while he shows what's happening with the fires and there's the other guy he was a news anchor and he basically he was trying he was wearing the fire coat and he had david muir and he had the uh he had the clothes pins on the back of the fire coat to make it look more yeah fitted dude he got so that guy got torched i'm like i didn't get that one i'm like i don't know jack osborne was the one who started that it wasn't that crazy but like dude like, I didn't get that one. I'm like, I don't know. Jack Osborne was the one who started that.

It wasn't that crazy, but like, dude. I mean, he didn't do that. It's like one of his fucking producers was probably like, there's 100 mile an hour winds and your jacket is flapping everywhere and it's fucking up the sound. So let's just like tighten it. I don't think it was for him to look better. I mean, he looks like fucking Zoolander. Yeah, he does look like Zoolander. Yeah, it is funny.

I understand your point that you're just like, well,'s a guy he's a los angeles like newscaster they're gonna look slick but it's like the guy looks like zoolander so it's funny i know it is funny but it's just like you're out here like you know reporting on a tragedy and you're dressed like zoolander he's like can we tighten this up he's not zoolander he's the other guy he's what uh owen wilson owen will he's owen wilson. He's the other guy. He's what? Owen Wilson. He's Owen Wilson. Yeah, he's literally like, I look a little frumpy in this fire jacket. You're right.

I understand your point that you're just like, what are they supposed to do? Maybe not send that guy. I don't know. And then the next interview he did, though. Put some shit on your face a little bit. Maybe make it dirty it up a little. I don't think they'd like that. They would not like that. Too much. But anyways, there were some people that were doing compilations of all the people like gaining

clout off of this oh for sure but what are you gonna do i mean hey man they're still at the end of the day there's still clout to be had there's clout to be had and these are people who live in hollywood what do you want never never let a good crisis go to waste and these people are probably like they're you know they're getting they're having meetings with their agents being like you know like i talked to my agent he said it's a shit show over there oh i bet i mean dude some of it looks like a fucking looks like hiroshima yeah some of it literally looks like a goddamn nuke went off but he even said it's a shit show like um not just that like you know everyone's oh basically like yeah

everything's all over the place like the place is falling apart yeah so i mean like you know everyone's oh basically like yeah everything's all over the place like the place is falling apart yeah so i mean yeah you know what the crazy one crazy thing for me was i didn't this business where the criminals also become firefighters yeah 10 cents an hour or whatever it's like bizarre to me well i mean they have jobs like a lot of them have jobs so i didn't realize they let you out of the prison to do your job oh yeah some people have jobs like if you're in like minimum security they'll you can have a job that's like on the outside yeah i know it's like there's like a very honor system and it's for like uh like you know more trustworthy and it's for people that probably have like a year and a half left so you're like oh they might take off and it was like okay then they want to put another five years on

their center yeah exactly it's like if you it's like there's no real benefit for you taking off because it's just like you just yeah add tons of time and you go i just didn't i didn't know that existed where they i i've seen the things where they're like into chain gangs and they pick up garbage yeah but these guys are like out in the mix i mean they give them axes it's kind of wild i imagine none of them have violent crimes they're probably all drug dealers no they said that and there's like no sex offenders yeah and their stuff but blue face the rapper he was doing it that guy's pretty violent dude he oh he oh he's in jail They're probably all drug dealers No they said that And there's like no Sex offenders Yeah And their stuff But Blueface The rapper

He was doing it That guy's a pretty violent dude Oh he's in jail? Yeah he's in jail And he was Fighting fires? Yeah Well his mom was out there

Saying that he was Too famous to be fighting fires And he should have had more money Yeah I mean 10 bucks a day Is pretty good to be honest Well I think one thing They forget when they talk about

They only make this much The prices are way lower in there Yeah that's like It's probably like 8 soups a day or do you know what i mean like they give you like a chocolate bar i don't know the exact prices but it's not the exact same as they are in the real world no i think it's well i think it's pretty close like i think like because again i watch all these prison tiktoks and stuff it's like i think it's like the main thing is like soups and stuff and they're like a dollar so you can make like 10 soups a day which is essentially

currency no you don't make a dollar a day i think no no they make ten dollars a day i'm saying oh they were making ten dollars a soup is a dollar but i think a lot of jobs like you know the most you make in a lot of prisons 45 cents an hour i don't know i just thought that was like wild though yeah they let them out i mean i wonder i wonder if they're gonna get any sort of like time removed from their sentences for like doing that also how does the water chief make 750 000 it seems high for a government job uh yeah doesn't that seem crazy i mean that seems like probably gavin newsom doesn't even make that i would guess because the president doesn't the fuck the president of the united states makes 400 i mean you can understand why people like you know

corolla was going off on this and he affected him personally yeah he's just like you know fuck this shit but basically um the 750 grand a day and then when she goes on a year and then when she goes on interviews she was all just like you know we want to make sure that there's equity everywhere of course of course that's why she's here yeah but 750k is nuts yeah that that does seem actually pretty crazy because i would imagine Gavin Newsom makes 300 to and change. 750 grand a year to come out and say every problem ever is climate change and not you. Climate change really is like a catch-all that nothing that happens is your fault.

Yeah, I mean, you can just never take the blame. Wasn't that like Mike Solana? He made a thing called- 242,000. Yeah, exactly, right? I mean, he's got real money. Yeah. But he had

you know Mike Solana yeah the pirate wires and stuff of course I was trying to get him I was talking to him about getting him on the show okay well I like him

he said he'd do the voice cast actually oh okay yeah yeah well that's good I like him yeah yeah but I think he made a book that was called

Climate Change Ate My Homework or something like that oh yeah yeah yeah it's kind of true I mean I guess he actually had some wild takes great boogie man he was kind of saying

he was like does he live in New York no he lives in San Francisco he was kind of saying he was saying, he actually had some wild takes. Great boogie, man. He was kind of saying, he was like, does he live in New York? No, he lives in San Francisco. He was kind of saying, he was saying that people were talking about, you know, the weather being controlled

and then he was like, it's actually not that crazy. We could kind of control the weather. Absolutely. I didn't realize that. I mean, they do it, it's cloud seeding. They do it in China.

Cloud seeding. Yeah, they do it in China. They do it in Dubai. How does that work? It's, I can't remember what it is, some phosphorus or something. You basically just shoot it up

into the air and then it just creates artificial clouds and starts raining. Yeah. Yeah. But the problem is, is, you know, there's all these things about

whether it's good for the environment. So then even in a, in the case of like a fire, they'd be like, well, you know, there might be some like environment, like even that pink shit they're spraying everywhere,

the fire retardant, they're like, come on, fire r word that's what i put in my sketch but uh uh that stuff people are like oh you know like we needed to fight the fires but like we don't know the long-term consequences of spraying it everywhere like it can kill animals and all this stuff so i don't know if they were trying to like hold back on on even spraying that shit i think if you're doing meetings right now and you have people

raising concerns like that you're just like uh do you mind stepping outside then you lock the door you go all right so what we're doing is yeah we're just dropping it she goes to the bathroom just lock the door all right let the adult drop fire retardant everywhere just drop it anyways then and i guess the last thing that was kind of interesting was that the people were people were getting mad because other people were hiring private security systems private firefighters which i did not know was a thing i uh i didn't see the guy the well i looked up you can do it for i think it's like 10 grand two thousand dollars i look yeah so with a truck this yeah this started with uh this guy his name's keith washerman i don't know

if you saw this tweet it went like a mega viral when the fire started this guy it was in palisades and he put it out a tweet and he's like a real estate developer and he put out a tweet saying like are there any private firefighters we can hire like everybody in the neighborhood is like willing to chip in because they're all about to lose their homes yeah just like last-ditch effort and then just absolutely got savage i know like he got to the point where he deleted the tweet deleted his account everything it had like 10 million views everybody's just like yeah you fucking rich people think you just hire private firefighters he's like i mean i pay the most taxes out of anywhere in literally america like the firefighters that they have that should be you know like sufficient or not so it's not that crazy he's like you know what your taxes i pay although i guess i guess the only like there's no hypocrisy really because the hypocrisy would be if a guy like that was out there

you know kind of campaigning that or like basically slipping regular firefighters like an extra money be like yo come that come come do our place first and you'd be like yeah these aren't firefighters that are like would work unless they're no but if this guy was saying hey, I don't think the government's doing that great of a job, then there's no real... But if he was sort of saying, like, hey, we should take more money and give it to these people... Yeah, that I don't know about. Then there's sort of an hypocrisy. I know one, they found one tweet where he's essentially like, because he's a real estate guy,

and essentially, like, with depreciation for real estate, it's like he's able to, like, minimize his tax burden. They found one tweet of his like that so then they were all dunking on him being like you don't even really pay that much taxes anyways but uh yeah there are private firefighters because this guy who owns a mall this guy jim caruso or rick caruso who ran for mayor he has this whole like swanky mall and he hired these private firefighters and it's two grand a firefighter but they show up with like these giant tankers full of water yeah and he saved his whole mall and his house i didn't realize you could do that either i never why didn't the city just add them to the mix probably don't have the budget

for it i guess yeah they go i mean probably a firefighter makes 2000 a week and they go these guys are 2000 a day and probably like and again and then where do you deploy them like dude they'll look to be like we're paying private firefighters to go save five million dollar homes at two thousand dollars sure just like let them burn just yeah i i understand why it like pisses people off but you're just like well people are allowed to hire people to do stuff i don't know absolutely absolutely they are but i i was when he tweeted i got there's such a thing as a private firefighter and because again you think like 99 of the time they're not working at all like what do those

guys do the rest of the year well maybe they are maybe they get hired for all sorts of random shit maybe yeah maybe they have like they do a bunch of different stuff but you just don't know yeah you don't know so i don't know maybe they get hired a lot on film sets for example like hey we're doing something where we have we're burning something we're blowing something on something up maybe they have a lot of that kind of jobs yeah and that's maybe why there's lots of them but i thought you still hire regular ones because like i remember when we did the movie like and we had like shooting guns and stuff and then well that's canada not los angeles yeah yeah but we had to have all these police officers and they're like you know they're same when they have events and they're all like police officers but they're off the clock

like they're not off the clock but they're not actually like technically on duty well i don't know yeah i don't know i don't know that's what i'm wondering i'm like well i'll tell you some we had this one thing and i was just gonna say because to say what what's been going on in la this is uh on reddit uh los angeles area 28 nita and this is in goon cave official subreddit for gooning, uh, in Los Angeles looking for a, a bro for weird short vids. I'm 28 came up with the idea for a blog,

disrespectful dicks where two dicks come and pee or, or didn't, or on random objects that pissed them off. Uh, no gay shit, just weird short vids. Like Beavis and Butthead, but for dicks. If you're weird and down for shit like this, DM me. Yeah, yeah.

Nothing gay about two dudes jacking off on a Funko Pop they don't like, huh? Just both just jacking off on this thing. What's up, brother? How you doing? All right, yeah, great to see you. So obviously, just whip it out and let's just get to work not a paid project either by the way just looking for another bro that wants to show up and film them just pissing on their bootstrapping this one they're expecting you to go there will

be some money down the line but for now it's yeah obviously i'm just looking for another person to build the business with yeah you know maybe we get some angel investors down the road but for now we just need a proof of concept so if you just want to come jack off on some stuff with me. The Goon Cave subreddit we got to go through one day. When I was there, I found one more.

Looking for the Goon King. Hey, Gooners. JJ. This is JJ. Hey, Gooners. Do you think you have the hottest GIFs, the best plus,

or most arousing videos? I want to see the best to the worst of your collection. Do you believe you can impress me? So the Goon King's sitting back in his throne right now. I am the Goon King. Who has what it takes to dare to make the Goon King goon? People are fucking nuts right now.

Yeah. It's funny because it's probably like, this is the official Goon King Reddit, but there's probably like- That's another thing I've noticed that everyone's talking. You know what? Everyone's talking like a nuts right now. Yeah. It's funny because it was probably like, this is the official Goon King Reddit, but there's probably like- That's another thing I've noticed that everyone's talking. You know, everyone's talking like a computer right now where if you think of,

you know when you post something and they go, doing this is preposterous. No, they go, doing this is diabolical. Oh, saying this is crazy. You ever seen that comment? Yeah, yeah, yeah. You know the thing? It's like everyone's sort of using,

I was even thinking of like most slangs. Like if you think of like Canadian slang, we're fucking bloody giving her, right? Sure. There's almost like a bit of irony to it all. Like even a lot of hip hop slang was always, there was always like a tiny bit of like irony to the whole thing.

It's a little fun. It's a little fun, but also there's like a bit of an acknowledgement to I'm saying a thing that's been said before. I feel like a lot of people right now are carbon copies of like, they're just like fitting a carbon copy of a thing that exists, just becoming computer code with no acknowledgement to the fact that people have said these words in this exact same sequence thousands of times on the daily.

Yeah, yeah. Does that make sense? Yeah. I mean, some people get all their opinions from just tweets and memes and they just regurgitate them without modifying them in any way.

They just read them and they just go, this is... Yeah, you know, if one of your buddies watched a podcast and then told you word for word

something they heard like they're just saying it, they would say, oh, I was actually watching this thing this guy said this. Or you'd be like, a buddy of mine

has a joke like this. Sure do it i think there's something about this like new slang that has removed that part of it that's like the thing you ever get in turn like that that isn't like i know you're like i know this has been said before is in in there's irony in these yeah yeah subcultures dialectss. Yeah, you ever have the thing where- That does not exist now. Someone tells you, you go, you got to hear this story. You go, that was my story. I told you that. And you go, oh, what? Oh, man.

I thought that happened. I would just die of embarrassment. I thought that happened to me. Weird. That was my story. What do you mean? Yeah, I told you that. I did tell you that.

I'm sure me here, we've had one of those. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Where I'm like, did you hear that thing? And you're just like, yeah, I told you that. I did tell you that. I'm sure here we've had one of those. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Where I'm like, did you hear that thing? And you're just like, yeah, that's from here. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I mean, I've done that too. Yeah. Not recently.

Story, I don't think I've done with story. No, I remember like in college. Or maybe like, but I never would tell someone's story. But I might say my buddy has a story. And you're like, yeah, that's me. I'm the buddy. I'm the buddy. Oh, shit. my body has a story and you're like yeah that's me I'm the body I'm the body oh shit okay so this is probably

took us a while to get here there's a French theater and this is the headline hate to see it hate to see it French leftist theater faces bankruptcy

after opening its doors to 250 African migrants for a free show. And they refused to leave and remain in the building five weeks later. So, Hey guys, I don't know if there's, if there's more of a theme to what's going on anywhere right now,

then it really does matter who you vote for. It matters. Also, sometimes it feels like it doesn't, but it does. The answer is pretty simple put on some of your french plays like i guarantee you if i was an african migrant yeah and i'm just like oh we found let's bust into this theater oh good we'll stay here free shelter and then okay welcome

bring in the mimes welcome obviously to start the we're going to have 12 hours of French plays. And then we're going to have a French improv troupe come on. Oh, that's... I don't do it very... Sir, it's not going well. Bring in the improvisers. Bring in the improvisers. Can I get a name? Oh, oui, oui, oui!

Can we get the... Can we get the night, then? Can we get the place? Can we get the night, then? Everybody's like, I'm going back to fucking Africa. I need a place and an item. Excuse me? Croissant.

Okay, very good. That's what I'm saying. I can't think of any way to get them out quicker than just put your regular scheduled programming back on. Here's the thing. You're a solutions guy. The thing is, in their heart, they don't want to do anything

that puts these people back on the street. Even if it is something like that. Well, they're worried about their image right now. I'm sure this French theater has been Julia Roberts-ing to the max. They've been Roberts-maxing. They've been Roberts-maxing? Julie-maxing? For sure.

They have. They're just stuck in this impossible situation where they're like... Juilliard Roberts. The only way they can go to sleep and feel better about themselves is if those people just leave on their own accord with nothing they did. Yeah, oh, for sure. They have to just willfully be like, that was a good time.

See ya. Well, the guy next door has a bistro and he's like, this has killed my business. Oh, I'm sure there's every restaurant in the area. They're like, yeah, this big theater is just not operating anymore. You're like, yeah. Gavin Mac... Not Gavin Macron.manuel macron he's been getting

kind of hit because his wife's like golden beat uh-huh she was she was his teacher when he was i know we've talked about this everyone thinks she's a man yeah but the man have you ever watched her she's like because she was yeah she was so much older than them and she's like kind of looks like a gremlin now yeah yeah she's like gremlin. Yeah, she's like 70 probably. Yeah, she's old. Yeah, she's normal for 70. But it is funny when like, you know, the husband's still like noose at me. So the husband's kind of like a svelte, heartthrobby type.

Yeah, good looking dude. And this woman's like a critter. Critter. There's a video. A video people call it. there's a video a video people call funny like every

every like famous politician they're calling his wife a man yeah I know I know that's like

but this one there's one video where Emmanuel Macron's wife is like wow you know she's slithering around and then she sits down

and like man spreads from she has the Al Bundy just like yeah she puts the hand in there. People are like, case closed. Case closed. That's a vet.

But yeah, the French theater one's so funny because I can't think of anything that would be more torture for a bunch of African migrants than watching the mimes coming and pieing each other in the face. Can we get a volunteer? Fake pies, not even real pies pies fake pies in the face this is shit yeah the mime i mean that's the thing he's stopping racism

with mime they're from they're all i don't know where it was but they're all from some french colony so maybe they're like a little like how do you like a little taste of your own medicine exactly you colonized us now we're colonizing your theater. We're colonizing your French theater. How do you like that? But when the conference was finished, the migrants who mainly came from France's former West African colonies, like Danny said, refused to leave the venue.

And now they're going out of business. They don't know what to do. Yeah. I mean, the problem is, yeah. They need to send them to another improv theater. I think that's what they go, we actually found a better place for you. And they send them to like the, you know, the... Nah yeah they need to send them to another improv theater I think that's what they go we actually found a better place for you and they send them to like the you know the nah they're not buying that the people who did the um who's the people who did the uh

the olympics like whatever theater did the olympics yeah send them to those guys theater that's the only way it's like when a punisher's talking to you you have to pawn them off on someone I think they'd have like an empty like on someone. I think that's the only way to do it. You know, for the Olympics, they build all this stuff that never gets used again. Because you know how many... They're probably chained up. They're not going to let them in. Go put them in the badminton arena.

These people are getting tested. Right now, you're watching a meme of someone morph from liberal to republican, probably. No, they won't allow that. because they know that's what everybody wants. I know. That's what they want. No, they're just having a meltdown.

They don't know what to do. It's like they're having a, it's literally the not in my backyard people experiencing what it's looking like in their backyard. And that is, you know, that's hard on the brain. It's probably breaking them. Yeah, for sure. But they won't allow it. They're going to be like,

yeah, I guess we lose the theater and we'll start a new theater. We're not starting a new theater. And if we do, you're not working here. That's fucking for sure. Whatever genius idea it was to bring in 250 African migrants, we're going to job at a fucking cafe or some shit

because you're not working here. Let's talk about Zuck Bezos and Elon right now because it seems like the tech CEOs are really having a cool off. Since we did our sketch about Zuck and he basically released the Rogan episode right after and he kind of said basically what we said. Dude, he goes on there and he was just like,

it's fucking too feminine and tech and everything like that. It's so funny to watch Zuck, Bezos, and Elon are really having like, and this is what I told you, it's like the tech CEOs always, they're always kind of like late to the game. Elon's being a bit of a dork

actually. He's kind of being the most dork out of all three with all this like fake video game stuff. Fake video game stuff? Why? Apparently he's like

not the best video game player. It is crazy. Yeah, he's like hiring people to play for him. It's giving, finish that sentence, it's giving cheater. cheater cheater vibes i mean it's bizarre you're like you don't have enough we're like on top of all i started fighting with i got asmongold he's like a video game player he

took away his check mark that is so funny posting his dms and stuff yeah and he's kind of posting everywhere i told what did i tell you when a tech CEO is getting into a culture? If you see tech guys, a lot of them on aggregate, and I like the tech pros. I got no problem with tech pros and finance pros. A hated group of guys, not by me. However, when on aggregate, they really

embrace a culture, that is on its way out. Yes. Also, again, at heart, like, these were the nerdiest people you went to elementary school with and that's still like a formative part of their whole persona so then when they're getting like they start getting bullied a little on the internet and they just regress to being like a you know 10 year old getting bullied and they're like very much do you think elon's lying about being good at video games i mean yeah john says yes it doesn't make sense i mean that's

fucking hilarious i mean it doesn't make it like here's the thing like lebron james for example is i believe a top 100 madden player right like he is legitimately like lebron james lebron james the fuck yeah he's like but like he posts and everybody says like all he does is play madden like he he watches more game film of his madden games than he watches of the nba like like he only does one thing when he's not uh playing basketball and that's playing madden like that's it that's all he does whereas like no he reads what the first page of a lot of books sure but like elon musk you're like he's running all these companies like surely you don't have the time that's what i thought it doesn't pass the smell test

it doesn't I guess his version of it is he's like I'm just so much smarter than everyone you don't understand Johnny's not buying it do you play that game there's people who play that 24 7 and like he's better than them yeah it just doesn't make sense you're as good as how much time you put in

yes and it just doesn't make sense you know like that one you just go that doesn't make sense. You're as good as how much time you put in. Yes, and it just doesn't make sense. That one, you just go, that doesn't check. Dude, that's a fucking wild one to get busted on, though. You can't play an hour or two a day and just be like, yeah, I'm the top guy in the world. You're not even trying to say, hey, I'm top 100. Even LeBron's not like, I'm number one. He's just like, yeah, I'm in the top 100 or something.

That's like top scandals. That's like finding out a hot chick was wearing a mask yeah you know i mean it's like a cat latex pulls off yeah it's like a it's like a pro it's a real cat it's one of these weird things where it's like it's lying and you're like for what like are you not like we get it you're sick man like like you got all your sudden rockets into space like i don't really care if you're good at video games like you're doing all this cool stuff i think it's that norm mcdonald joke where he just says a lie and then you go you know then someone goes have you seen this movie and you go yes yes what am i lying about now why yeah yeah but it's one of those where it's just

like someone someone he was in a scenario where someone's like i'm really good at this video game and someone's like cool he's like i'm actually the best in the world yeah really yes yeah yeah maybe it's this whole thing now i'm gonna go find the guy who's the best in the world and then have a live stream from my twitter account probably that guy is drowning in ndas hey they probably have a whole warehouse full of those ndas though no for sure that's probably making five million dollars but he must be nda'd so high i know and the worst part for that guy is he is the best player and he can't say he's the best player. Oh, fuck no.

He's just like, you're like, you can't even say you play this game. That's part of the NDA. You go, you're like, what game? Was it like League of Legends or something? I don't know. That would be funny if Elon Musk stopped playing the game all of a sudden and then not Elon Musk is number one. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Dude, that is, I don't know the intricacies enough. Johnny says he does and it's like doesn't make sense i mean i'll tell you this i bought a playstation like fucking seven years ago or something because i was at a leafs now is zuck even doing mma that's a good question it sounds like he is sounds like he is but uh i bought a playstation because i was at a leafs game and they had like a display and i was playing nhl i was like oh this is pretty fun so i haven't chell so yeah so i bought a playstation 4 and then I hadn't played video games in like 10 years and I started playing,

like I did like, you know, the mode where you like learn how to play and then I was like, okay, I'm gonna go play online. I was playing like against six-year-olds and I like couldn't score a goal. Okay, you're just getting swept. Just destroyed by like children and then at that point I was like, okay,

for me to even like have any fun, I have to dedicate 20 hours a week to this. Okay. Not doing that. And I just, that was it. Yeah. Right? So you're like, for Elon to just, and these are way more advanced.

It doesn't make sense. You know what it does feel like? Remember our sketch rehab for bloggers? Yeah. It felt like there's rehab for Silicon Valley taxi. Kind of. And they all kind of went there. Again, it's like coincidence that Trump is coming in and they're all of a sudden

like, yeah, Trump is pretty based actually. No, I don't think any of them really thought any of this stuff. I, like I said, my,

my theory is not that, you know, these guys, I change a heart. It said there are sharks from the get go. The question is, do other CEOs do seem a little more ideological? Do any of them switch?

Like, do you see Reed Hoffman be like, I'm into archery now. Look, if being Reed Hoffman looks like fucking Michael Moore If all of a sudden being racist is like getting you booked in movies

in Hollywood everybody's gonna be racist These people don't even know who they are No Especially Hollywood actors Hollywood actors have lost who they even are

from doing so much acting and just being fake all the time And they were already a little bit prone to that from the get go That's why we're bad at acting because we're such good like humans yeah because we are such connected humans which is why we're bad at acting yeah and they're good because they're just like con artists essentially and so they're just like you know you go where where the money is sure yeah so i definitely think that i would love to see

a ceo that wasn't about that life I guess Suck wasn't about that life but like you know properly yeah like Reid Hoffman or something yes one of these CEOs that's you know fully going the other way and him coming out there being like Reid Hoffman puts on a chain he just works out like a

like Rob Reiner starts doing MMA and stuff yeah yeah Rob Reiner's like I'm a I'm a karate guy now. Keith Olbermann. Yeah, he's in Miami hanging out. Yeah, just on a yacht. With Jean Saint-Pierre. Jacques Saint-Pierre.

Jacques. Well, Bannon's been really fucking going on. Bannon, he's been really going in on Elon. Oh, yeah. He's bought him. He sort of did replace him a little bit, if you think about it, though. Who? Oh, Elon replaced Bannon. Kind of. oh yeah he sort of did replace him a little bit if you think about it though who oh oh Elon replaced Bannon

kind of yeah Bannon was sort of like Trump's like guy that was in his ear you know what I mean I mean he takes credit for getting him elected

the first time well I don't think it's not totally untrue he had a hand in it and Bannon did his time too like he is loyal yeah he is loyal and then

I don't know a ton about Bannon but I know that he was definitely involved and then um it does seem like elon took bannon's place a little bit and bannon's not feeling that no no and he's like yeah he's a chinese plant and all this stuff and he's like owned by the ccp that's what he says about elon oh he's on a rant about him he's like he's the worst guy ever he's like a uh you know it does seem like elon's talking too much oh because he sort of had it you know no question he sort of had it and this is more elon it is a little bit but i guess the way he sees it is he's like i have to keep talking because i need twitter to be bumping sure sure

i mean but again you're like people are i'm sure some people are i i don't know what the net is of people who are like i hate twitter so much because so much because Elon's my whole for you feed and I hate this guy. I guess you could block him. Did I be a gay guy to be as just like an Elon pro reply guy? I mean, being an Elon anti-reply guy is gay too. I mean, look, just being like a Trump reply guy was the gayest thing? Just being like a you tell him?

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I mean, being a Trump reply guy was the gayest thing. Being a reply guy stinks. I mean, you a Trump reply guy was the gayest thing. Yeah, just being a reply guy stinks. I mean, you're a Krasenstein at this point. It's just like Krasenstein literally went from Trump reply guy to fucking Elon reply guy. Okay, my point to you is I think it's corny being a reply guy, period. Of course. Being a pro reply guy edges it out for a little gayer.

Yeah. Just because you're, just at least you're like, at least you're disagreeing in the replies if you hate them. Being a reply guy that's just like, couldn't have said it better. Yeah. It's like that. Nailed it.

Was it like Looney Tunes? Remember where there's the big dog and the little dog? Yeah. You're that guy. Yeah. You tell him boss. Yeah. That's what we were saying there.

That, uh, the joke we were making that I've tried to make this a joke on stage but I've never really been able to but the idea is that you do need women a little bit

or not a little bit like the idea was that that the women will stand up for bad working conditions in a way that men won't whereas back in the day it was just another guy

being like oh I got my arm cut off I'm back into work. Yeah, literally just coughing. It's cold. Yeah. And it was like a week of women working in the factory being like, hey, we're all dying.

Yeah. You know, like- Can we get some air conditioning, some fans or something? Can we get water? Is that, you know, you kind of need that. But it was a little like that.

It's almost like they're hardwired to complain better. But we said it was Jimmy Fallon when he was yelling at it because the reason he got in trouble is because women work there too. Whereas back in the day, like, you know, the people would come in and it would be all male writers and be like, you fucking

piece of shit. The guy have a spit spray in his face. Sorry, I'm right. I'll get right to that. It'll be better this day. Sorry, boss. And weird because the shows were better. That was kind of the heyday. You're saying that's what it needed. I mean, this was the heydays you're saying that's what it needed i mean this was the heydays of these shows another fucking absolute garbage slot well you might say it was the heyday

for profits in a factory when they were losing their fingers and couldn't do anything about it good valid point you know there's a balance to be struck okay fair enough fair enough that is a good point maybe the balance went the too far the other way but there's a the balance on aggregate needs a little bit of maybe yeah maybe a little a little more yelling a little yeah a little more yelling yeah but it doesn't uh you know you probably want to balance it the other way as well but the idea was when fallon was yelling at people if it was just dudes no you wouldn't hear shit no never never they should be like yeah he sometimes gets you definitely haven't wouldn't have a guy in the writer's room being like to his boss where he's like he finally moved to new york or los angeles and he got this big writing gig on fallon and he's finally doing it and fallon

comes and yells at him and he stands up he goes you can't speak to me like that yeah you don't see a lot of that no or like going to the other comics like that you hang out with me like can you believe jimmy fallon yells at me sometimes you He goes, dude, you're right for the Tonight Show. Shut the fuck up. Yeah, you're not going to convince me you're a victim. Now. No, you're not getting sympathy from me. Yeah, you need a little gender dynamics getting involved to convince yourself you're the victim. That's for fucking sure. Because you also need an attitude of like, you need to believe that anyone could do any job, too.

There's a bit of that where you're just like, I actually could do his job just as good. Yeah, that's true. Anyone could do anyone could do his job just as good uh-huh yeah that's true anyone could do anyone's job he just happened to be the guy in that job sure yeah he just got lucky i could laugh look it so the rizzler that's how elon laughs yeah that'd be a good competition as Silicon Valley's top laugher. I know that Elon Musk doesn't live in Silicon Valley anymore, but it's just like the two of them

having a laugh. Ha ha ha ha. Ha ha ha ha. Ha ha ha ha. Zuck. We never, yeah, I don't think, oh, no, Zuck,

I think laughed a couple times on, I don't know what, dude, he was on fucking Rogan dropping F-bombs and shit. Bezos might be, I mean, Elon Musk is getting more shit done that's for sure oh it seems like his space stuff's gonna edge out bezos oh for sure but bezos is enjoying

himself that's for sure he's on the yachts with fucking caprio elon musk is gonna literally have the world like wired like like wi-fi for the entire planet every day two years yeah so elon's every square inch of the fucking planet Is gonna have wifi Yeah I guess And phone reception And like literally Yeah where his thread sucks You hear that Zuck?

Threads blows I'm just gonna fucking Back from behind It puts me in a Choke lock It's not that bad Sorry Zuck Sorry

I would stink to have to get Beat up by Zuck Get tapped out by Zuck It was tapped out What'd you say about threads yeah and then you go fucking you know he gets trained personally by gordon ryan bezos his wife looks like every morning she wakes up and just has a pound of fucking plastic put on her face oh yeah yeah but she's probably 70 so i don't know how old she is but she no i think she's i think there's tony gonzalez i'll tell you what she snorts lines

of collagen You know how people say it's like a trap When they have a really hot chick But then she finds out she was trans They like trick to trap And that's why a lot of football players Flip out and kill them I feel like that a little bit

With girls that look like Bezos' wife Where I'm like It is working Where technically that is all the stuff That I find hot I feel like that a little bit with girls that look like Bezos' wife, where I'm like, it is working, where technically that is all the stuff that I find hot, where it's like all of the parts that are sex appealing, you've augmented. But if I'm able to remove myself from that, where you tapped into my sexual energy, and I just look at you like a human, I'm like, this looks ridiculous. This looks ridiculous. She ridiculous. This looks ridiculous.

She looks ridiculous. But if she catches you on the right thing, you're just like, boobs and lips. It does get me. I mean, maybe not her because she's fucking a little old for my taste. Sure. Yeah, she's got to be in her...

I would guess she's like... Yeah, she's a bit up there. She's got to be fit. But I'm saying that it does sometimes tap into that where I'm just like, the dick's liking it. The dick's... But the brain's fucking... This is silly.

I mean, she's basically like, you know, you go to a strip club and how old... She's 55. So she's a solid looking 55 year old. But like, you know... Definitely. Go to a strip club, chicks want to give you like a lap dance.

You know, she's kind of old, but she's like still got all this stuff. Yeah. But you go, I think she might be like 50. but she's like, still got all this stuff. Yeah. But you go, you go, I think she might be like 50. I'm telling, I think they know how to talk to the dick. Yeah.

Cause the face ain't listening. Well, no, the face is completely paralyzed from Botox. It just doesn't move at all. Oh, you know what? Uh, also come see me on tour this weekend.

I'm going to be in Minneapolis, going to Edmonton, Phoenix, Vancouver. And, people just to clarify, yes, going to be in Minneapolis, going to Edmonton, Phoenix, Vancouver, and people, just to clarify, yes, it will be in Vancouver

and Portland. It will be me and Danny and we're doing two theaters and the Vancouver boys have been actually coming out. We're like more than halfway sold out

and it's a month away. I have two big ass theaters. Let's go. Tacoma, Los Angeles, Irvine, San Jose, Los Angeles,

if you lost your house, we're going to give you 20% off tickets. Tampa Bay, Salt Lake City Denver Atlanta Baltimore RyanLongComedy.com yes sir

check me out Edmonton Vancouver April and May and go subscribe to the Low Valley Mail YouTube channel subscribe to Danny's channels

patreon.com slash the boys cast we're 100 away from doing another episode so go over there we've had a lot of new joiners well it's been our line's been consistently up

But I think when we did our Christmas episode A lot of people went and watched the Christmas episode So we had a little bit of an influx There you go Alright, thank you everyone Two bear to the moon! Peace