The Boyscast with Ryan Long - #45 TAKE YOUR DIVERSITY SCOLDING
Episode Date: December 18, 2020It's time for a scolding, Vice's Problem with Celebrities, are Asians better at math, and government control of the internet Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices...
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And you can tell our friends, and they can have my things when we're dead.
We gonna live forever. We gonna live forever.
You can tell our friends.
Welcome to the Boys' Cash, the first podcast exclusively for the boys, not the second, not the last.
And this episode is brought to you exclusively by Stereo App.
And at the end of this episode, we went to Stereo App and we did a sketch competition
where people pitch me their sketches
because people love to pitch me sketches.
Now, I was in Tampa this weekend
and the bars are completely open.
People don't wear masks.
The only place you wear a mask,
you know, the odd place you wear a mask is the
businesses get to decide. And you feel like an explorer, you know, Will Smith in his apocalyptic
movie, where at the end of the day, you know, you're searching for humans and then you get
there and you're like, there's a place over the hill where people are living like human beings
again. And for a second, you're like, this is crazy. What? You know, the bartenders are spitting in your mouths. It's insane. And then after two hours, it's just normal again. And for a second, you're like, this is crazy. What? You know, the bartenders are
spitting in your mouths. It's insane. And then after two hours, it's just normal again. And
you're like, oh, right. This is how people used to live. Like human beings. A place that probably
by all standards is a hellhole is now like a paradise. Two tickets to paradise. Trampa,
like a paradise. Two tickets to paradise. Trampa, as people call it. People are doing karaoke.
I lost my passport and that was quite the debacle. Had to leave the airport again and found it.
I was Will Smith, who I wanted to talk about anyway. This is, so I was shown this. Will Smith's family has a show where they bring people on and, you know, talk about
very important issues. His grandma's involved. And they brought the girl, the daughter of Lori
Laughlin, who got, who was her mother, as some of you know, basically paid to get her into school.
And they brought her on and the grandmother like unloaded on her.
And she goes, you're the face of white privilege.
You know, you're basically everything that's wrong with this world.
And the daughter is like, yeah, you know what it is.
Because mom's in jail right now, first of all.
So like didn't get away with it, which is always funny because you're like, this is the kind of shit you people do. I get it.
shit you people do. I get it. But it was just so funny to me to watch Will Smith's grandmother tell someone else, you are only got to do this because you have a rich parent. You're like,
you are currently on a TV show that you are the host of because your daughter married Will Smith,
you know, and she's kind of famous too. But like legitimately, you are now part of like Hollywood royalty family.
The son, Jaden, is legitimately had a big rap career when he was nine years old.
The other ones were in the big movie where, you know, the dad works too much and they have to sleep in the bus shelter.
You know the one.
You know the thing.
So they're a whole family of people that got, you know, rich and famous because they were related to someone rich and famous currently on a show because you're related to someone rich and famous telling someone else that you're only doing this because your parents are rich and famous and it's privilege.
And it was just like, first of all, the girl's super young.
So, I mean, I doubt it was like, mom, you need to get me into this place.
It was kind of like, you need to get me into this place. It was kind of like,
you know, thrown on her or whatever. But more importantly, you are, you can do that too.
So there's this idea of like, there's a person that's like, this is a race thing, or, you know,
it's always a race or, and you go, you're, you're currently doing that. Not only can you do that,
you currently do that. And again, like Big Willie
Styles, but get your family in check. And I think it boils down to, if you look at the last five
years, the theme of the last five to six years or whatever has just been like, take your talking to.
And it's like, by celebrities, by all these people, they're like, take your talking to.
Sit down. Let me tell you why you're the privilege and, they're like, take your talking to. Sit down.
Let me tell you why you're the, you know, privilege and all this stuff and just take your talking to.
So Danny Palaszczuk had the funniest story about getting your talking to.
Because the talking to doesn't stop, you know.
It's not only when you go on the famous TV, which I don't know why anyone would do that,
go on a TV show to get their talking to.
But the talking to's don't stop there.
You know, like the people are getting the diversity training at work to get their talking to. There are seminars that you can get your talking to's don't stop there. You know, like the people are getting the diversity training at work to get their talking to.
There are seminars that you can get your talking to.
If you're part of like, you know, a sports team or any sort of organization, you know, you got to sign up.
You show up.
Yes, you take your lashings, your religious lashings.
So Danny had probably the funniest story.
His friend did diversity training and he's like, you know, fairly like left wing guy or whatever. But he says, you know, he likes their sketches and stuff like that. And then he goes, so he was messaging Danny this funny story. His friend did diversity training and he's like, you know, fairly like left-wing guy or whatever, but he says, you know, he likes their sketches and stuff like that. And then he
goes, so he was messaging Danny, this funny story. And basically what happened was this guy went to
his work and they sat him down. They're like, you know, you did take your training, you know,
sit down on your knees, take your shirt off. We'll begin the lashings. And the first slide,
it says we should treat everyone the same regardless of their race
gender and we shouldn't worry about anyone's race or whatever and he was sitting in the back and he
was like oh this isn't so crazy click next slide big x wrong and so at first he you know he sees
the slide and he's like oh yeah yeah not i guess this isn't that crazy it's like you know, he sees the slide and he's like, oh, yeah, yeah, not. I guess this isn't that crazy.
It's like, you know, don't treat people differently because of their race.
Wrong.
That is incorrect.
Another diversity training story that my friend told me that I was with this weekend because we were talking about this.
He says that his buddy went and it's an Asian dude and he comes out and he talks in an Asian accent and he goes, you know, you know, the white man, whatever.
Right. And then after like five seconds, he goes.
And the thing about this is I actually speak like this.
And that has shown your biases.
And so everyone, all the all the white people are there is like, oh, my God, I am racist.
I thought that he talked like that. What?
First of all, when that guy thought of that bit, he was like, you know, this is changing the game.
Even though I know three or four comedians that do exactly that.
They do it with an Indian accent.
And then they go, actually, I talk like this.
And you go, what is the point of this?
And it's like, see, you're racist.
You thought I talked like that.
It's like, because you were.
Yes, you could have that accent.
I might be suspicious if a white guy came out and
he was like hello it is me white guy you go hmm that's interesting were you born in India I think
I might want an explanation for why because I haven't seen very much of that one time um I have
a joke where I said there was a white guy that had a Chinese accent because he grew up in China
and I think I did this on my on my but like, it looked like he switched bodies with a guy from, you know, Vancouver,
Canada. And right now there's a black guy or a Chinese guy like they're waking up like,
what the fuck? Why am I talking like this? Because it was a Freaky Friday situation.
But this is what I looked up diversity training. Everyday Feminism offers one right now.
And it's called Decolonize Your Mind.
And if you guys are interested, which I think you should,
because everyone listens to the Boy Scouts is part of the problem.
And it's only $150 and you get to go with a group of a few other people.
I mean, take my money already, I think is the best way to say out of the gate. So these are some of the categories.
You can have practical decolonization. So you learn how to live it daily, you know,
just to make sure you're not colonizing if you're walking around and you're colonizing things.
Also, they say decolonize your activism. So if you're at a protest currently and you're accidentally sort
of colonizing, if you're sitting there with your Bernie Sanders protest sign and defund the police
and all that, but while you're doing that, you're a little bit of colonizer, even just a little bit
of a colonizer, boy, do they have the program for you they provide you with the tools and resources to help you not
help you recognize when colonial thinking is influencing your actions because and out of the
gate i was just saying that i needed that i was like talking to my body and i was like you know
sometimes i just feel like i don't recognize when my colonial actions are infiltrating my thinking
they teach you how to indigenize your mindset,
allow you to begin replacing Western colonial interpretations of history and current events
with indigenous perspectives. Basically, you can learn that wherever you are from,
you were actually the bad guy. Because probably in most histories, yeah, they probably paint themselves as a little bit
more of the better guy. But just the idea that basically I think if I, if I think for example,
that I'm not totally the problem, they will change your opinion. So when you're eating foods,
like you're eating a burger, you take that as normal and be like, well, yeah, because that's
because you have like Western influence. If you're out there and the movies that you like, if you,
you know, for example, like Under Siege with Steven Seagal and you're watching that and you're
like, this is sick. You need to realize that you only like that movie is because Western colonial
has Western colonial stuff, all of, has oozed into your brain,
giving you all the stuff.
Whereas in reality,
you know,
a trans indigenous woman,
if you're watching that,
you actually would like it way more.
So you train yourself to like different things.
You train yourself to say,
to realize different people are funny.
And everything that you think,
from movies,
to foods,
is all just been programmed into you. and it needs to be deprogrammed
so if you want 150 bucks this is not uh this is not an official sponsor but i do recommend that
you and your four friends fun for the whole family you know what i mean good good good christmas gift
mom i got you a decolonize your minds package. You know, good Christmas gift just for the whole family.
Essentially, it's a, you remember when people used to go to jails and they did scared straight
programs where everyone yelled at them so they wouldn't be in jails anymore?
This is a scared decolonize program.
Essentially, you go in there and they go, you fucking piece of shit.
Look at you.
Look at that t-shirt you're wearing.
Yeah, well, you know that you think t-shirts are normal?
Actually, men wear dresses in a lot of places in the world.
So yeah, and they wear headdresses too.
And the fact that you just think you can wear a baseball cap and that's normal,
that's adorable that you think that's normal.
But you should think it's normal to wear a headdress.
Also, you can't wear a headdress.
So basically basically the whole
grift here for all these places is create a problem that you can solve. So it's like create
racial divide. And then you go, listen, guess what? We've created this whole situation where
everyone is like sort of divided racially. And we sort of let you know that you are not the same.
is like sort of divided racially and we sort of let you know that you are not the same.
And there's only one way to solve that. And you guessed it. It's us. It's very similar with,
you know, comedy and stuff like that. It's always like, you know, you need to get rid of,
we need more women or whatever, but you're like, which ones? And you're like, well, me, obviously.
So the whole thing is create a problem. And that's the same with COVID. A lot of it was that. It was very like, let's destroy businesses, do all this stuff. And then you're like, well,
we have the answers for what to do when everyone's poor. And you're like, well, you're also championing
the issue. So I've been saying, there's a lot of people that have the idea of stop this deal.
They're out there. I have the idea of stop the pander.
So these people are not to be pandered to. And to relate this back to original article,
you have celebrities right now that are all on board 100% with the stuff that, you know,
the blogosphere and the diversity training sphere and the sell you, you know, the selling you how to
be, the selling you how to be woke, you know, racket. And this is what they get. So Vice wrote
this article. It says 2020, the year celebrities lost their shine.
And the gist of this article is that all of these celebrities that were, you know,
doing all this pandering and woke stuff or whatever, they didn't do it right.
So this is what you get.
And basically, the idea is every person, especially in Hollywood,
they're pandering to these people,
this small group of vice reporters saying,
please,
I'm on the good guys.
And this is what,
this is how you get repaid.
Tell me if these are people that you want to pander to.
The whole thing's one big hostage situation.
Hmm.
They say with little else to do, celebs show their asses at every opportunity in 2020. Similarly, we were happy to hand it to them with a newfound rigor.
For example, the naked voting, the pandemic song, then there was the toe-curdling I take
responsibility video. But over the best part of the year, it's been pretty clear
that the famous people have been the virus all along. Couple things to say here,
for starters. So when these celebrities did all of those things, which I couldn't agree more,
were terrible. They were lame. But why did they do them? They did them so you wouldn't write
about them. They're like, how do we get like the blogosphere to write about us? How do we get
articles to say that we're part of the good guys? How do we not get killed? Am I doing my black
square right? Did I post my status right? All of this stuff is so like these people stay off their back
they're essentially paying you off by doing your article like though this our responsibility yes
it was because you drilled it in their head they had to do this but infecting their minds
agreed it's terrible but you told them to do it. And you're like, well, we didn't tell them to do that.
We wanted them to do the way I do.
And you go, yeah.
So I think hopefully these people are starting to realize that you can't win.
This is a situation where you're told you have to participate.
I agree.
Some of these people should have sat this one out,
but you told them they had to participate. these people should have sat this one out.
But you told them they had to participate.
And that's what it looks like.
They were always lame.
You know, actors have always been lame.
These aren't the smartest people in the world.
And they get popular and they go,
oh, I got to say stuff now?
And you go, what do I say? You go, basically, the gist is that you have to admit that you're racist. And they go, oh, okay. I take responsibility
because I'm racist. And then you go, guess what? That sucked. You're still out. And they go,
you took the shot, brick. Ugly girl that has a different boyfriend,
ugly girl that has a different boyfriend,
demanding your respect,
and you're begging for it.
And celebrities didn't change.
But for Vice to spin this and say,
and the celebrities,
we handed their asses to them,
and they were happy to do it.
So a bunch of these celebrities who were essentially bullied into participating
and, you know, they're self-flogging, now they've not done it right.
And you go, and we're essentially tattling on them.
And we're writing the rules of how you have to do it because we actually gave you a list of things you have to do.
But we didn't like the way you do it.
We actually have a very narrow list.
It's a very authoritarian system. And now you're like the cool kids. Like, yeah, you know, we get it. We're the
cool kids. We hand it to them. This is legitimately if 25 years ago or however it was conservative
Christian moms were like, you know, these kids, they thought they could listen to Marilyn Manson
and we had to tell them it was wrong and burn those albums.
We just start a fire and throw those books in there.
And we were happy to do it.
Rock on, dude.
We were happy to hand the rasses to them.
It's legitimately church ladies trying to be like, and most of all, you agree with the celebrity consensus,
the consensus that, you know, we're bad, blah, blah, blah. We need to apologize.
You guys are on board with that. So you're giving them a flogging on their flogging.
Notable mentions include Virgil Abloh donating 50 to a black lives matter protesting
fund despite a net worth of 20 million kim kardashian posting about humbly being reminded
of how privileged her life is at her birthday from a private island both of those were the
stuff that you guys are telling them to do. So you said donate. He goes okay.
I'll donate.
And then they go you didn't do it right.
It's like what if he donated to 50 of them.
And then Kim Kardashian's like right right right.
Still privileged.
A lot of privilege.
I know. Yep.
Very privileged.
And then you go.
Can you believe these goofs.
They're like trying to.
They're literally on their knees begging.
Yeah, they're bad at it because no one cares.
Everyone's full of shit, including you guys.
Everything that they mentioned is someone trying to impress the blogosphere.
We'd be best placed using this time to reevaluate our collective relationship with fame and interrogate the savior complex that didn't form in a vacuum.
To think critically about why we have become accustomed to turning to famous people for answers.
A thought process that may have saved us from Donald Trump's presidency.
So you shouldn't listen to celebs.
Guess who you should listen to?
You guessed it. Vice Mag. They got the answers. This is what's happening. You're creating a thing.
They're taking it over. They're appropriating your nonsense, but also you force them to.
And you go, no, no, no, no, no. You can't listen to Kim Kardashian. You can't listen to Virgo,
whatever, who's donating. You got to listen to us. Actually, guess how you can listen to us
for 150 bucks. Three people, one hour session, decolonize.
This is a dude coming up to your chick and being like, you need to replace that boyfriend.
Like he's the worst. He's not doing it right. Yep. I know he's trying to be a feminist. He's
wearing the future is female, but he's not doing it right. And then you go, Oh, who should I replace
my boyfriend with? And you go, I mean, I listen, I don't want to, I'm not trying to tell you exactly
who, but you know, I, I guess we could try me me i never even thought of it now that we think
about it i'd take you for a spin this is what all these people are saying and they want to create a
scenario where you have to pander to all this stuff or you get your extra flogging for them
for trying to get your for trying to you know know, trying to retrieve your vlogging or else they call you conservative. That's the, that's really, that's the biggest tool in their toolkit right now.
And I see a lot with the sketches, um, with fucking, you know, every comedian, they wrote
an article about like every New York comedian. I've talked about this a little bit, but it's,
you know, bubbles back up and there's so many things that are so funny about it. I mean,
right at the beginning, you have a group of people, like, which is mostly comedians,
who've dedicated their lives to be fucking pirates, essentially.
And it's like, you have such a little grasp on culture.
You can't see that they're just railing against what they see as the authoritarian force.
It's so obvious that that's what's going on.
And it's like, people like me, I'm like,
I've actually lived an alternative life. I just, these people just don't have the guts to live alternative lives. They don't have the guts to do anything that actually probably would be,
you know, in their mind liberal without making everyone make it normal. They want society to
put training wheels on them doing anything crazy. And you go, oh, you should be able to, you know,
go sleep with all these people. Go do it. Yeah, but I want everyone to think it's normal.
See, these people are actually very conservative about their liberal ideology.
They're, you know, someone like me, I don't care about traditions all that much.
It's very biblical. Recently, and this is why it's like such an insane arguing tactic to begin with,
because you go, okay.
When you look at recently, I had that a bit on one of the videos I posted about the governors.
And you go, the fact that lockdowns are even a partisan issue,
because you think about, it's a safety versus freedom thing, 100%. And then a
bunch of governors put all these lockdown restrictions, and then they got caught, you
know, partying and stuff like that. And I'm making fun of that. How on earth is that even anything?
There are plenty of conservatives that are very safe about this stuff. And there's plenty of
liberals. Like, you guys are all very safe.
And then there's some people that like are more for freedom.
All these people are very safe.
And the only thing they have to lob is like,
this guy's a conservative.
And even the politicians in the debate you're watching, they're kind of arguing over who shut it down quicker
and got the thing.
It's like, you know, conservative or liberal,
no lots, there's lots of people out in the world
that are, before shutting this down, like the idea of that, like a conservative viewpoint
is locked in. It's like, this is how entrenched in this bullshit you are. It's like, yeah,
I don't really think the lockdowns are good. A bunch of governors got caught being insanely
hypocritical about it. I point that out and then they go, that's all you can say.
critical about it. I point that out and then they go, that's all you can say. And the reason for that, it's like kind of a bit of like a feminine argument. And a lot of times it is guys doing it,
but it's guys acting like chicks because instead of saying, here's what's wrong with your argument
and I disagree with you, they go, he's against us. Look at, this is the point that's against us
because they can't stand on their own arguments. So you go, no, no, no.
It's not me versus you.
It's you versus us.
They need to bring all of their people involved, you know?
They try to like pull it in.
It's like instead of someone being like, oh, you're a douchebag.
You tell your friends, you're like, this guy said he wants to fight all of us.
Because that's the thing.
They can't argue in the thing.
You know, it's like, oh, if people are saying it's funny and they're argue in the thing you know it's like oh it's if they think
if they you know people are saying it's funny and they're like oh it's not funny they're like this
this guy is trying to make humor against us our team and on top of that it just turns people to
fucking conservatism honestly because think you know oh a bunch of like the renegade comics, a bunch of, and, and I don't say that necessarily in the
good way, legitimate psychopaths, a bunch of pieces of shit. People that have, like I said,
dedicated their life to be essentially pirates, be a perpetual child. And you're going to these,
and these people are just making fun videos, having fun, making fun of cool shit, arguing with people
who are telling you what to say. And you go, look at these conservatives. And then people go,
oh, a bunch of guys drinking and like partying in a video and making fun of like politicians
is conservative. I guess conservatism doesn't sound so bad. You kind of turn everyone over.
It reminds me a lot of when, you know, if you said, for example, back in the day, if
you look at music, if a punk band, you know, they want to dismiss it, they would say, oh,
it's pop punk.
And then if you like, if you think bands are cool, you know, let's say Rancid or I don't
know, whatever it was.
And then you go, oh, this band's pop punk.
And you go, oh, I don't know. I guess pop punk's not that bad mumble rap they called everything mumble
rap so you're like okay so all the top new rappers are that so maybe i don't know maybe i like that
so it just turns people against it you go hmm so the all the fun comedy of all the like cool
comics that like me and my friends like it's conservative comedy. I don't know that I guess I like conservative.
It's always, it's always, you know,
a freedom versus safety thing.
Masquerading as a left, right thing.
You know, you take people that were probably,
you know, against the board, you know,
for abortions and healthcare and stuff.
And then you go on, this guy is frigging, you know,
this guy is, this guy's a Christian conservative.
And he goes, get me my cross, I guess.
I will say one thing that someone like there are times with, you know, people's videos.
And this is all of us.
And in this game is someone like Donald Trump Jr.
Like he just retweeted one.
And you go, it's one of those things where you get weaponized because they retweeted with like, yeah, you know, if it happens to align with their thing, you're
not, you know, retweeting one of the ones where I'm kind of making fun of Trump.
So they sort of retweet that video and like, and then everyone's like, you know, he could
retweet like his favorite Simpsons episode and people have to be like the Simpsons sucks.
It's racist, conservative comedy show.
So as soon as like some of those people put their stamp on your name, it just automatically makes people hate them. So, you know, the criticism on
there, but we all, you know, none of us are immune to criticism. I think that I, you know, people get
those. And I, like I said, I think I've come to the terms that like, you really should probably
listen to people that you care about and people that are coming in good faith than people that are just politicized on the internet.
Their opinions are to be ignored.
But you do think.
You go, is it?
Am I that?
And you start thinking about yourself.
I'm sure a lot of us have had some version that where you go, what is my belief?
Do I have even a political side?
And I go, I start thinking about it.
And I'm like, okay, so I make fun of the other things a lot.
And then I was like, you know, I was going to, and I'll take you a perfect example. I was going to make
a, you know, it's kind of funny to me whether you think there was fraud or not in the election,
which like probably almost positive, of course there was. But when you start thinking about
that, I'm like, it is kind of a little funny when you're like, it is pretty much a guarantee
at this point that Trump probably won't win. It's not going to take it back. And there's a lot of
people that are still just like, no, he's got this lockdown. I was like, that's kind of a fun, that's like a
funny little phenomenon. So it was kind of thinking about that. And then I go, I looked through my
Facebook feed and I looked through my Instagram feed or whatever. And I go, that's a hundred
people making that joke, a thousand people making that point. And you go, yeah, well, that's not,
it's kind of like the flat earth thing when I used to think, yeah, that is a little bit funny. And then you look and you go, I see 10,000 trillion people
being like flat earth, flat earthers are so stupid. And I've seen like one flat earther.
So the actual people making fun of it is everyone. And the thing happening is actually like a small
minority. And at that point you're like, like well it just seems like the majority kicking the minority well it's down and it doesn't seem like a funny point to
make whereas what i see is like the mainstream narrative of like these lockdowns being amazing
so it kind of seems like more of a point that i want to make end of that you might say like oh
that's just because liberals dominate entertainment you go yeah well i'm in entertainment
i grew up in you, beside a liberal metropolitan,
went to university, been in entertainment my whole life.
So yeah, that is what I've been seeing.
So you're right.
If there was an entire shift, who knows?
Maybe my targets would be a little more on the other side.
But that isn't the reality.
The reality is entertainment is one very specific point of view. So it's funner to me
to make the other one. At the end of the day, they can keep complaining and I'll keep getting
more savage at comedy till I'm awarded my crown. The rules are very complicated to follow if you
want to pander to this. Here's another one. Everyday feminism. This is the one that's offering you
the $150 an hour treatment
to solve yourself.
I was offering treatment the other way,
with my vice treatment.
But if you don't want the vice treatment,
you can get the everyday feminism treatment,
they say.
Why we need to dismantle
the model minority myth
of those hardworking Asians
and that Asians are good at math and science.
And they say, so you're kind of like, you know, you're always like, so can I say, what can I,
what can I say? And they're like, you can't say they're good at math. All right. I'm trying to
make sense of this. And they say, we need to dismantle things like they are successful
economically and academically. Heaven forbid you say that about an Asian person. They are hardworking and high achieving. These things gotta go. And the reasons
for they give a bunch. For a long time, Asian American activists have worked hard to debunk
the model minority myth by discussing its negative consequences. One, for starters,
internal racism with certain Asian communities against other communities of color.
So by saying they're good, you know, this is worse for other people,
it divides people of color and serves as a tool for black racism, is what they say.
It's used to deny social justice.
And there's a bunch more reasons why you don't want to get caught saying that Asians are good at math.
But more importantly, the million dollar
question that has not been answered, are they better? That should be the only thing that matters.
So, I mean, when you look at rappers and they're all black and you say black people are better at
rapping, I don't think that anyone would have a problem with that. It seems like pretty mainstream
opinion. But you go, Asians are pretty good at math. And they go, no, I don't think that anyone would have a problem with that. It seems like pretty mainstream opinion, but you go, Asians are, you know, pretty good at math. And they go,
no, you can't say that. And they go, well, are they? The truth has no place in any of this.
If you go, you know, black guys are better at comedy in this thing. Okay. Are they? Is it true?
It's like, that's all that matters. So it's completely irrelevant whether it is or isn't true.
You just can't say it.
You go, hmm, can you understand why people don't like that?
And you go, okay, I generally develop my opinions and points based on like what I see and try
to like align somewhat with the truth.
And they go, yeah, stop doing that.
Stop right now.
Thank you very much.
Need somebody with an Asian touch.
You know, stop saying that guys like girls who are 100 pounds rather than 700 pounds.
What if they do, though?
Well, you just have to stop saying it.
I will tell you this.
So I went to university for
originally for math economics. And at the first couple of years, it's all the economics programs
are together. In third year, they have the tests get pretty hard and they have this one test that
40% of people drop out of the program into the easier ones. So essentially
out of the math faculty into the business faculty, Danny Polishuk is one of those people.
And so basically they have this, and I, you know, originally I went to school, I was going to be in
like economics. I switched in the math thing because I was just for whatever reason, fairly
good at it. And it was one of those things where like, I kind of found it funny
that I was like doing really good on these tests.
And I was like such, you know, I was like a party guy.
I would like show up to drunk to class and I was that guy.
And then when I got really good marks,
it was like fun to me to sort of rub it in people's faces
that were, you know, poindexter, so to speak.
And that, but that was at the beginning, you know,
that I was like, oh, I'm like smart enough
to kind of be better than this at normal people.
After third year, then like a lot of people drop out because of this thing.
In fourth year, it was me and out of 15 people, 12 Asians.
And then it was like, yeah, not easy anymore.
Once it was just those people, I was like, yeah, this sucks.
And at that point, I could give less of a shit about school. I cared about being in a band. Now I'm in was like, yeah, this sucks. And at that point I could give less of a
shit about school. I cared about being in a band. Now I'm in fourth year, too hard to switch. I'm
in a class with 12 Asians. They're killing me. The one question it's 45 pages. That's your exam.
And you go, this sucks. So why was that? I don't know. Heaven forbid that it was because they did,
they did better at math for whatever reason. You go,
no, no, no, no, they didn't. There's also another thing that I believe is that they teach math
better in a lot of Asian cultures. And that's one of the reasons why they've actually historically
been better at it. And that gets passed down. For example, just the way fractions work. If you look at the way that we teach fractions, we go three
fourths plus five sixths, you know, and that's hard for people to visualize. Three fourths.
It doesn't really create a picture in your mind. But when you say out of 10 things, take eight.
Out of four things, take three. Everyone's mind just pictures that so the way that their their their language works contributes
greatly to that and because of that you know no one gets it from the beginning because all of our
things I've always said I could teach people from from first principles I don't know if you ever saw
the movie road trip where he goes I can teach it to anyone I've always I've always felt because
it's not that people are it's not because the people always go I could do math or I can't do
math but the actual truth was it's that no one learns the first things.
So you're just remembering stuff.
And then eventually it gets too hard to just remember a bunch of rules.
Because no one ever learns how to do it.
So that's why most people just like check out.
Whereas in their language, even just from the way linguistically, we have 11, 12, 13.
Where it should just be 1, 2, 1, 3, 1, 4, 2, 1, 2, 3.
Like that's how 0, 1, 0, 2, and then 2, whatever.
You get what I'm saying.
So that's how their language works.
So there's actually reasons why the people's parents understood math and then they understand
that.
So there's actually actual reasons for potentially why.
And in conjunction with other reasons, but more importantly, in conjunction with the fact
that it's probably actually true.
But you're like, yeah, you just can't say it.
And you go, all right.
I'll try to, I'm trying to pay attention.
I'll try to stop saying all these things,
but just make sure you, you know,
you're small when you don't do that.
Don't go out there and make a video
saying that you got to stop saying this stuff because then you're on Vice's bad list. And so
you can kind of see how all this stuff is like a maze. You know, if you want to be pandering to
like the consensus of how you're supposed to talk right now, all of it is sort of a maze that
everywhere you go, it's a dead end. If you try to pander to them and say, oh, you know, let me kiss your vice ring.
That doesn't work.
If you try to, you know, use like,
if you try to make the things work in conjunction,
they don't, you just have to, you know, believe.
You just have to believe.
And they wrote this article saying
that algorithms are a problem.
And it's kind of interesting to see because you go, so I guess the end goal is just to sort of own everything.
Because the idea is they're like, we'll think of the answers and like how we want to, you know, how do we want everything to look?
You shouldn't say this.
You shouldn't say that Asians are good at something.
But you can say that this and you're like, well, those don't work.
And they go, we'll figure that out later.
And you're like, well, those don't work.
And they go, we'll figure that out later.
But one of the things they want is like, you know, that, you know, people that are successful and to be even.
And they wrote a thing saying like that algorithms are racist. And so what we need to do is start being having government control of algorithms.
And you go, this stinks.
It's crappy.
of algorithms and you go this stinks it's crappy because if you look at it they go it's one of the only meritocracies left it's like again they aren't perfect but they're only out there's one
of the only meritocracies left is that algorithms can kind of go on like yeah people watch it more
it shows it more things like that but there's problems like even when they use these for like crime for example if one group is like doing crime more
then then you're then they go oh the algorithm was written in a racist way and it's again there's
all people a lot of people point this out but they don't even take into factors like that one race
their age is different so if one race is like average age of like 60 and one race is average
age of like 20 like which one of those is going to have more crime but if you have if you have things like that and it's like producing
those any neurons they go oh the government needs to take this over and they go what if technology
belonged to the people with the economy and society falling apart these massive companies
already monopolies doing during normal times are becoming monolithic yeah because of you and they
say put simply we can't create we can create technology that is owned
by the people who use it and whose main purpose is to help humanity rather than extract wealth
for a small class of individuals. So basically, if the algorithms are doing it wrong,
are getting the wrong results, then there's something inherently wrong with the algorithms.
then there's something inherently wrong with the algorithms.
And it's like their idea is that the government should be owning the internet and owning the algorithms and all that sort of stuff.
And this is like one of those big questions that people always get to.
And I think that there's people on the left that think that, you know,
if we control these algorithms, we can, you know, we can be in control.
And then there's the people on the right. They're like, if the government can take, if we control these algorithms, we can be in control. And then there's the people on the right,
they're like, if we are the government,
we can take control,
then we'll have it our way.
And in my mind, I was like,
I just don't see this working out right.
When you see those politicians like Ted Cruz,
they go out and they get to lecture these tech companies,
but you're like, they don't care.
And even if they do care,
they're not going to do anything about it
just like the left-wing politics don't act politicians don't actually care about your
woke stuff and they never talked about it seven years ago but now they're really into it it's
like these guys don't really care about this stuff it's like what if the government gets
control of the internet that is bad news it can't it's gonna be worse it's this is bad right now
but at least there's five of them. At least there's other ones popping up. The main purpose of the technology will be to help humanity. This is what they do.
You know, it's the NICE project, the Human Rights Tribunal in Canada. And it's like,
guess what? They won't consider helping humanity. My jokes. They want this so bad net neutrality remember when they go off this doesn't happen
the world's gonna burn then it didn't happen and they never apologize they say there are startups
which which right now which assign a driver's safety score based on data collected from your
phone and it can predict that which is the gist is they go off. You've driven through.
If you drive more, if you drive fast, if you drive through, you know, crazier, more high accident areas, then they'll give you worse, you know, insurance rates, which is scary, but also kind of sick. It's one of those things where you go, I don't know, dude, like, I don't know if you fight any of this stuff, but them taking it over is not going to be good.
And should the government do it?
Like this is bad enough companies,
but it's like all these left-wing people are like,
didn't you watch Snowden?
You go, don't worry.
But this time, once they get the control of the internet,
they don't trust me.
This internet safety thing,
once they get control of that technology,
they'll use it for good.
They say insurance may maintain that such a system will be fairer because it puts prices more accurately
reflecting of individuals' risk. But they're actually just redefining the term of fairness.
Which one of those two people is redefining the term fairness? Instead of spreading risk
across a population to hedge for a variety of life. Well, not if you consider insurance supposed
to be like catastrophe and if you get in an accident. But more importantly, it's like,
that's not why you have insurance. You are readier on most insurances. There's a lot of factors
that they grade you on. Like for example, when I did insurance for my show,
I got graded on a few factors and they charged me a different price.
So a lot of places will still, they charge younger drivers
more than older drivers in a lot of places.
It's just they didn't have the data.
Now they can trace you like a fucking, like a hamster with a leash on you,
which again, isn't good.
But none of this is good. And that's not better.
It's definitely not better. And they'll say things like, if you don't have anything to hide,
you don't have anything to worry about. Yeah. We all agree that that stuff is bad. We, I just don't
think that the government is going to be like the one to solve this problem. They're like,
it's for the people. consider the ride hailing company
uber its platform allowed was allowed to grow and i've been critical of uber they you know they're
doing all sorts of weird shit while competing against existing transit options subways and
taxis which were having which had to pay an absorbent fee for their medallion and you go
yeah that was crazy how you scammed those cab drivers
and their mafia unions, like literal cab drivers and their fucking mafia came down.
And they're like, yeah, you need to limit the amount of cab drivers so we can own these
medallions. And then they can be, you know, they can go up in price and you're like, yeah,
that was a scheme that shouldn't have happened. There's no real reason, especially now, if you
have the app tracking you to some degree,
that there couldn't just be anyone.
Uber was safer.
Cabs can fix with that.
Why can't anyone just be a cab?
Yeah, that was bureaucracy that you put up that sucked.
Solving a problem with another problem.
If you need to get somewhere,
you should not worry about whether you can afford it.
So it took about five seconds to get this from
algorithms need to create the world that we want.
So algorithms, we need to program algorithms.
So they essentially cheat and they call that being fair.
So they essentially cheat to get the desired outcome that they want.
And now we're at, you should have the government driving you around for free in like three steps you go everyone
should have a chauffeur and you're like i do see how you can get wrapped up in this stuff though
you know what i mean it's like it is pretty easy to be like hell yeah dude government should be
driving me around why aren't algorithms like making my insurance cheaper and you go just
because you're telling a bunch of people that'll be better for them but at the end of the day you're like hey these companies have too much information and
instead of being like yeah definitely there should be laws that if like they leak your
information this is like really bad and they shouldn't be able to give it to the government
so they could spy on you and you just gotta hope to god that uber's not fucking watching you jerk
off and tracking where your car goes so they can report it yeah this could
you report it to your boss they're like yeah i said i was taking the day off but actually i was
out partying with the boys in tulum and you tracked my you know shock collar that i was put on me so i
can get a good insurance rate you just have to hope but i'll tell you ain't gonna do it better
and i could see how you could be like Hell yeah dude The government's gonna come in
And just freaking sort this little puppy out
Pay for it with billionaire's money
I got a chauffeur coming around
So that's what's going on here
And I'm gonna talk a little bit more
About this stuff on the Patreon
But for right now
I have been pitched
An absorbent amount of sketches
And for the next 10-15 minutes
And please stick around
And tell me what you
And tell me what you, and tell
me what, if you have any ideas, because I'm going to do three more of these, and I think I'm going
to tell, get people to say some crazy stories, and stuff like that, not next week, but the week after,
but we have, this is the, I got a whole bunch of sketches pitched, and I will announce the winner
at the end of this episode, starting right now, so we're going live on the stereo app, and I told
people to keep it short, because I posted that I'm doing this.
And a lot of people sent me a billion more sketches.
And I got sketches like, this is one from my inbox.
A group of friends goes to New York for a Jets football game.
They discover no one's actually there because COVID actually killed everyone.
So everyone you see there is a hologram or it was pre-recorded.
And you're like, I guess COVID's killing people.
But a little complicated.
I think we want to stick to the point if you want to win the grand prize.
So that's what I told people.
Short and sweet.
Let's go.
First time.
So let's go for the first sketch on the stereo app.
Ryan is a director who applies the role should only be played by authentic representations of that group to the nth degree, e.g. a TV series about a gay guy played by a gay guy, but in the third series the character explores bisexuality, which meant Ryan immediately realized he needed to fire the actor because he's taking away a potential role for a bisexual.
And we're off to a start.
Sketch number one.
A little long.
Probably more of a pitch for a TV show.
Definitely will reiterate one to two sentences.
A hundred times better way to do this.
Okay.
Get to sketch number two on the stereo app.
A bouncer was told by his doctor to lose 300 pounds or he'll die.
Now scrawny, nobody respects him.
But he will still never let fat chicks in the club.
Someone's pandering to the judge knows that the fat chicks is the Achilles heel.
For me, guy gets skinny, still no fat chicks. I hear you loud and clear. All right, another sketch.
Boy Scouts of America makes amends with molested boys from 20 years ago by giving them all leadership positions in the organization turns out they're all pedophiles
now i mean that's just the reality of what's happening i actually did do a sketch where a
boy scouts a pedophile though and it was played by aiden because what happened was i did a group of
a group of guys it's a pA to stop the tick tock ban.
And one guy's like, you know, it's it's bad for our government over each and all the other
guys are actual pedophiles.
Like one's a Boy Scout.
One is a football coach and one is a priest and then a legitimate pedophile.
And they're like, hey, what's the problem?
We're five guys here that agree that tick tocks got to stay.
So I hear you. Also. Okay. Next sketch on the
stereo app. All right. So the idea is drug dealers during COVID-19. Everyone hates the police
and everyone is super depressed because of lockdowns. You could talk about the success of drug dealers and how it's been a banger year for those good guys out there.
Has been probably a banger year for drug dealers.
So I think there's something to be said about that.
Amputees are allowed to compete in the Tour de France on motorcycles in the name of fairness.
Imputees are allowed to compete in the Tour de France on motorcycles in the name of fairness.
Hey guys, how's it going?
Yeah, so my sketch is a real simple idea. It's about basically like the speed in which men start masturbating the minute to online porn,
like the minute their partner leaves the house.
So at first it could be just like, you know, like she forgets her keys and walks back down the road and then bazinga but then it like speeds it right up right right up until like she opens the fridge
door or she like drops her fork at the dinner table and like i like her head comes back up and
he's just like hunched over his uh hunched over his phone anyway guys love what you do cheers bye
thank you for sending on the stereo app i just love when people uh send the sketches where it's
like um you know or something like that and you know you'll make it funny like that kind of gist
that was one of the guys and girls things that i always talk about because
it's like no girls ever had to run home to jerk off.
How many girls have like run to the bathroom and jacked off while they're at their work?
Another sketch idea live on the Stereo app.
I have a sketch idea about a personal trainer that teaches people how to transition to the opposite sex so they have an advantage in competing in sports.
My name is Alex Stein.
I'd like to pitch it. Thank you. Alex Stein. That was the best sex so they have an advantage in competing in sports my name is alex stein i'd like to pitch it thank you alex stein that was the best one so far the trans stuff is always whenever i'm gonna do something about that i feel like i want to really
nail it because that is it's like it has a tendency to go like boomer-ish if you do it wrong.
Next sketch on this Dario app.
An activist mistakes an anti-corona vaccination protest for a pro-choice rally and has to awkwardly come to the realization of their cognitive dissonance.
Ryan is a marketing lead for OnlyFans,
and he's looking into how to reach out to small business owners whose businesses have been shuttered due to the pandemic.
And he's talking to maybe the guy who slices your pastrami at Katz's Deli
about how he can make an OnlyFans.
And that would obviously be played by Danny.
And maybe some vice or salon journalists or something.
I don't know.
Dude, I love it.
That was good.
There's nothing better that happened to OnlyFans
than the government taking everyone's jobs away.
And it was like, but imagine that the OnlyFans people
actually work at the government.
So it's like, it's the OnlyFans people actually work at the government. So it's like it's the OnlyFans lobby and they're so strong.
So they're kind of, you know, they're at the government.
They're like they're basically about to shut down.
You know, they're talking about, oh, maybe we should open this back up in the OnlyFans lobbies.
Like, honestly, I don't think we should do that.
It's very important to shut this down because every time they shut a business down, you have the people on OnlyFans and it's like a chef.
He's still got his chef thing and just like crying while he tries to stroke his dick.
Male OnlyFans.
Yeah, the guy that used to own like a used to own a bar and now he's just like spreading his ass cheeks on OnlyFans.
That was the best thing that ever happened to OnlyFans was this pandemic.
So the connection between the pandemic.
Okay, so so far, the two best ones so far
was Alex Stein and then this OnlyFans one.
OnlyFans one's really sticking with me though.
That's nice.
Good shit.
Okay, next sketch live on the stereo app.
You think you might be gay because you enjoy pooping so much.
If something could feel that good going out, you worry about what it may feel like going in.
Fellas.
Yeah, well, that's just, that's just what happens.
You know, I actually do know someone that has that joke. A lot of times things are probably better stand up jokes than sketches because I don't think there's any anyone be like sharing that.
There's not really any specific cultural point it's making, which is more how like the Internet works on shares and stuff like that.
But as far as a joke, I do know like a few people that have done a version of like I was worried I might be gay because I love the way that like poop feels coming out.
What about TikTok millennial cops?
Snapchat filters on wanted posters.
Hashtag defund me.
Hashtag the bad guys won.
Yeah, definitely take a spin at making that next sketch on the stereo app
hey ryan all right think about this undercover high school guy infiltrating women's sports
as a fake trans guy could be uh it could be pretty funny. Bulls for Ryan.
Phenomenal name, by the way.
I think there's definitely something with the sports thing,
but I think the last one was better.
The OnlyFans.
That was the original one.
Yeah, the trainer exclusively for trans people.
I will say 80% of the sketches I get pitched are about trans people. Next sketch
on the stereo app. All right. So there's this story about how these military guys were wearing
high heels to show their solidarity with women. And you usually think of military men as the most
masculine men. So, you know, there's something there where these hyper masculine
men are actually wearing high heels and pretending to be women or act like women to show how feminist
they are there's something there i feel like that is one of the most things i get that there
there's something there it's like it's the old uh the
old stand-up thing where your dad's like you know there's have you ever have you ever listened have
you ever go on the airport you know those things are pretty annoying and you go okay what's the
joke you should do a joke about that you go what is it you go there's something there I mean that's
that's where you come in you're accosted by a grocery store employee sir put on a mask you're appalled you'd
say how dare you assume my gender if you don't let me in at once i'll sue employees employee
of the store says go right in ahead ma'am just a fun scenario so i guess that's a hierarchy of
what you're allowed to be mad at so So yeah, next sketch on the stereo app.
Ryan, it's me, Alex Stein with the Conspiracy Castle.
If you shoot my sketch idea about the trans trainer,
I'm flying to New York
and you have to let me be one of the people in the sketch.
Alex Stein, Conspiracy Castle.
I love you, Ryan.
I'm going to be in that sketch.
We're going to make this sketch.
It's going to be a triple viral.
Alex Stein, Ryan Long, you're the man!
I don't know if that's a selling point.
If I shoot this sketch, you've got to come sleep at my house for a week.
You're like, here's the sketch.
If you make it, I'm on a plane right to your house right now.
You're going to be feeding me and bathing me.
I live at your house now if this sketch happens.
Next sketch on the stereo app.
Andrew Cuomo writes the next stimulus bill, which gives every American four ounces of dry spaghetti.
There you go. A lot of people were happy with my Italian Cuomo, Justin Silver.
I remember when we were first talking,
we were like, everyone should wear a suit and tie
and used to have a black beater on.
I'm like, hell yeah.
Yeah, the Cuomos.
How about a super non-woke trans person
just completely dropping N-bombs uh total racist but trans and then just plays
the trans card every time that's the thing though you you'd think because i know those people the
truth was like forever like drag queens and trans were super fucking sassy. Watch any, you know, comic or performer
from 20 years ago that was part of that culture. The same with gay culture. Like that used to be
the sassy culture that would say the wild shit. Like even if you look at like gay, I know he's
not completely gay. Like when you think of like an Andy Dick, like that's kind of what the gay
guys of that era looked like just saying, you the wildest stuff so the truth is as soon
as a trans person like what's that person blair white or something like that as soon as a trans
person goes against them you're out you know it's like when kanye west like plays the you know
whatever he's supposed to be like pretty good in the victim card hierarchy and then they go
he says he likes trump they're like he's gone's not black anymore. The minute someone steps out of line, they take your status away. They're like, yeah, you get to be, you know, the special status.
And then you're like, I actually say wild shit. And then they're like, we take that back. Next
sketch on the stereo. A woke person is trying to clear their name because last Halloween,
they went as the scariest thing they could think of. The white guy who went as Samuel L. Jackson the year before. To clarify, he only blacked up so people would recognize he was
the white guy blacking up as Samuel L. Jackson, not Samuel L. Jackson himself. Come on, what's
enough to understand here? That was the Tropic Thunder defense. No, I'm not doing blackface.
I am doing a character who's doing blackface always sunny in Philadelphia
did that too and they seem to get away with it there has been instances in recent history where
people got away with blackface and that's how they got away with doing it. But then again, if Jimmy Fallon said, like, I'm playing a guy named Tom and Tom's dressing up as Chris Rock, he would have been a little better off.
But, you know, it seems people are able to get away with it in the context of their characters doing it.
But I see what you're saying, where he's, he's done. He's done the
blackface and he's pleading his case. That's maybe that's something they're in a courtroom
would love to I've been looking at some big sets, like, for example, renting a church and renting a
courtroom and stuff like that kind of doing, you know, again, there's I literally sometimes do
sketches in my just in front of my computer one shot, and they mostly do just as good.
And instead, I'm on fucking rental sites looking to rent mansions and boardrooms and all this stuff.
Financially, it makes zero sense, but I just like sets.
Sometimes I just look at peer space and sites like that and just look through the sets.
And I'm just like, oh, that'd be fun to shoot there i found this huge abandoned like basement and it cost like a
thousand bucks for three hours but i was just like i want to do an antifa sketch there the guys went
out and they've just finished rioting so they they came back to their lair which would be this huge
thing and they finished rioting and then but what happened was the news comes on and
it's all like you know the protesting was super peaceful and nothing you know no one uh there was
no damage and these guys are just peaceful and they're like what the hell oh what do we have to
do for the news to report on us they're gaslighting us you know because they're all pumped they're
like oh i took out five windows i smashed up a bakery and then because they're all pumped. They're like, I took out five windows. I smashed up a bakery.
And then they're reading the news headlines
just explaining that they did nothing.
And the idea was, you know, they
keep saying the peaceful protesting.
So maybe there's a court case.
Ryan plays a scientist
who proves that men
are the best feminists, causing
women all over the world to complain.
I do like the idea of uh of men being better than girls and stuff this guy knows my language next sketch on the stereo app
i know one sketch that's going to be real popular come january 20th when someone do a sketch of
the fbi literally throwing trump out of the White House when he talked about, I refuse to leave.
And they literally throw his shit out on the street.
That would be funny in front of the Black Lives Matters club right there in the middle of D.C.
That's going to be funny.
If Trump wouldn't leave, it would be funny.
But the problem with all that stuff is if Trump doesn't leave,
you are going to see that sketch made 12,000 times.
If Trump so much as insinuates that he needs an extra day before he leaves,
that he needs an extra day before he leaves.
Like you were legitimately,
you were going to see every comedy writer in Hollywood in on late night and sketch comedy.
Like, so that sketch you just outlined,
if Trump even has the slightest inclination
to stay one more minute,
you were going to see 7,000 of those.
Next sketch idea on the stereo app.
You start using undocumented to describe things other than immigration, like calling car theft
undocumented title transfer and murder an undocumented DNR.
That's pretty good. I think I would say that's more of a a joke than um a sketch but you know i cheated on my
girlfriend or well it was just a undocumented sex you can say the sketch is called anti-racist
insurance agent and you are selling insurance against people being accused of racism in the
future it's easy solutions for getting out of uh the accusation of being accused of racism in the future. It's easy solutions for getting out of the
accusation of being accused of being racist. Okay. Insurance for racism. Something there.
Okay. Not terrible. To be honest, they essentially do have that the same way that Harvey Weinstein,
if you remember, Harvey Weinstein had like an insurance policy or something like that, where if, you know, if he got like sued or whatever, you have insurance against that.
Like people legitimately do take like liability insurance out.
OK, so I want to add on to the person that said insurance for racism and I want to say like cancel it cancel culture insurance
so it's like insurance for being canceled so it's not just racism but it could also be like
sexism or like you know all the other isms could be interesting but I feel like you're gonna have
to like flip it in an interesting way to make it not be problematic well first of all I am not
worried about being problematic but I think what I am more worried about is the logistics of the fact that you can get that.
So it starts out with a group of angry social justice warriors protesting against patriarchy to support Ellen Page transitioning to become a man.
to support Ellen page transitioning to become a man.
But after her surgery,
they,
they all turn against her because she's now Elliot page because she is a straight white male and as part of the problem.
Yeah.
That's one that a lot of people have made that joke.
And not to say it isn't funny,
but whenever like a,
a girl transitions into a man,
like everyone on my entire Facebook that is making edgy comments is like,
Oh,
another straight white man.
I'm going to throw a weird sketch out there.
I don't know what angle you guys are coming from,
but I always wanted to do a movie and star like Eminem and a bunch of the funny white guys like Jamie Kennedy. Oh, gosh, you know, popular guys, Stifler, etc. And have one black guy in their group, their collective group as being a fraternity that has filed for a black chapter because they have one black guy
and they meet up just like on the revenge of the nerds and they have a step off like uh
whatever the little show stumpy yard was against black fraternity that's one of my sketches this is an eminem movie starring ewan
stifler yeah i mean that's definitely a movie plot line not a sketch uh not a sketch idea but
it's always funny being like okay so it's my my thing it's me and george clooney
uh i don't know if i could get Stifler the Stiffmeister
I don't know if the Stiffmeister be available Stiffmeister's yeah out of all those guys
Stiffmeister was probably the most guy in American Pie where you're like this guy is never not going
to be Stifler he better hope that they make another American Pie or this guy
will essentially be irrelevant and then you didn't really see that much from the Jason whatever his
name Biggs guy so much you didn't really see that much from Oz and it was just and then the other
main guy uh whatever his name and you're like did fucking Stifler just become the actual guy that had a career of American Pie? Like, all right. But
I don't think the Eminem style movie starring Ewan Stifler is going to win the prize.
That concludes the ones that we're listening to on the boys cast. And to me, unanimous winner,
OnlyFans is better off with the lockdowns. Lockdown only fans.
I think that was probably the best one.
And then I went and checked out that guy's page after.
And he actually does make sketches.
If you want to check them out, his handle is Conradco and loose change, loose change.
So I'll put those up here.
And we'll send you a bunch of BoyzCast merch.
I'll get your address and stuff like that. And pretty interesting if you actually think about it that, you know, here's a bunch of BoyzCast merch. I'll get your address and stuff like that.
And pretty interesting if you actually think about it that here's a bunch of them
and then one clearly stands out, I think,
and you go to his page and the guy does sketch comedy.
So kind of some of those things help you.
It does make you realize that this is an actual thing
to some degree that you can get better at
and stuff like that.
But I appreciate everyone coming and tuning in a thing.
And I think you're going to hear probably on lots of other podcasts,
this, you know, stereo thing for the next little bit too,
because a lot of other people,
a lot of other people and my friends are all doing it too.
And it's kind of a big thing through gas digital and a bunch of other
places, but thank you for tuning in.
And thank you for tuning into the boys cast.
If you want to send me questions,
the boys cast with Ryan long at gmail.com and patrion tuning in to the boys cast if you want to send me questions the boys cast with Ryan long at gmail.com
and patreon.com slash the boys
cast won't be doing this next week but
then I'm going to do a new thing a couple more
times so I've been Ryan long
thank you everyone for tuning
in and see you next week peace