The Boyscast with Ryan Long - A Legendary Boys Panel on Bridget Macron's Penis, AI Girlfriends, & an Ozempic Intervention

Episode Date: August 15, 2025

Comedians Lev Fer and Colum Tyrrell join the boys in studio to discuss AI Girlfriends, the best Late Nite hosts, and a brilliant business idea SUPPORT OUR SPONSORS! Meundies - Go to https://meundies.com/boyscast and use promo code BOYSCAST to get up to 50% off! FITBOD - Go to https://fitbod.me/boyscast to get 25% off your subscription SUPPORT THE BOYS PATREON.COM/THEBOYSCAST  RYAN ON TOUR: Tulsa: Appleton: Sept 19/20 Columbus: Sept 26, Cincinnati: Sept 27, Cleveland: Sept 28, Baltimore: oct 3-5 ryanlongcomedy.com dannycomedy.com SUPPORT THE BOYSCAST:  https://www.patreon.com/theboyscast http://ryanlongcomedy.com Ryan @ryanlongcomedy To advertise on this podcast please email: [e-mail]    Or go to: https://advertising.libsyn.com/BOYSCAST   Chapters: 00:00 - Intro 00:23 - Legendary boys panel 01:52 - Pizza guy comedy 16:04 - Aerobics 18:34 - Midsommar 23:20 - Boy’s Q&A 26:47 - Lev’s bet 31:36 - AD - Meundies - Go to https://meundies.com/boyscast and use promo code BOYSCAST to get up to 50% off! 33:23 - Lev’s chaotic life 53:13 - Poop 57:23 - Lev’s hater’s ball 1:06:25 - AD - FITBOD - Go to https://fitbod.me/boyscast to get 25% off your subscription! 1:08:07 - DATES - Go to https://ryanlongcomedy.com and https://dannycomedy.com for tickets! 1:08:39 - Best late nite host? 1:09:50 - T*tstarter 1:34:44 - Thoughts on UK / Australia? 1:43:03 - Men falling in love with AI chatbots 1:52:57 - Wrap up / plugs

The boys, the boys cast, the lads, the boys cast, the dudes, prepare ourselves for boys' cast, the pros, just the boys' cast, the homie, the dudes, experience, the always cast, the boys' cast, the boys' cast, the boys' cast. The boys, yes, we're all, because we are here with a legendary, legendary boys crew. This is what actually When they invented podcasting This is what it was supposed to be Four white guys Four white

Just beast legendary boys panel I said it's a It's a dream come Boys who shit That's what it is The cack fight podcast Shout out Shout out to come

Lev That you might know I'm from the haters ball The OG haters ball I always laugh Because like Once I put up this post That was like We need to start being mean

To these influencer comics And I saw Ryan And he was like, all right, well, you first. He's like, what do you want to do, walk past one of these shitty comics and knock their water over? That's so funny. That's actually, I love both are all like, we need to be spitting in their faces. Yeah, we're a beerhole putsch.

Like, let's go. Over January 6th again, let's go. And he's like, just at home going, I'll see you there. I'm running late, lads. I couldn't make it. Hey, start it without me. I'll be there later. Enough's enough.

They come into our space. Yeah, but then whatever you do. You have to see him tomorrow, too. Call him for a revolution that he's obviously not going to be a part of that at all. Can I zoom in? Left's always like, all these comedians should be dead. And then they die, and then you don't go up the ladder in any way.

Your career is not better. They get replaced. Yeah, they get replaced. These influences will not replace us. I'm having a goof. I'm having a good time. I actually thought when you were your new thing, because you were sort of not happy with a lot of the wacky comics, I would say.

Is that fair to say? I didn't even know about the pizza guy And then I saw the pizza guy What's the pizza guy? Is it a pizza guy does like a porn comedy Like you walk in, he opens the pizza and jokes? There's a guy dressed as a fucking pizza As a pizza.

Nah, there isn't it. And he goes, some of these jokes are a little cheesy. And he goes, Mamma Mia. Oh, the jokes are same word. Is that true? I swear, yeah. And the fucked up thing is Fucking credible.

That show is so shit That he's like one of the better comics. All the jokes are like, oh, mama me and I'm like this guy's got it yeah this guy's got in comparison to

fucking people crab walking out yeah Jeremiah actually did a funny pizza thing with the American pie guy it was a pie never mind

take it back I was a pie pizza is a pie pizza is a pie Ryan dude you know what I was thinking though because you're talking

about the wacky comics and there is an influence of influx of wacky comics which is what always happens at the end of the peak of comedy

so if you I mean I would actually like to push back on that because that was actually always normal on open mics. There was always wacky comics at open mics. They just never made it into any sort of way where you saw them. Now they're just taking open mic comics

and they're like, we're just putting them on the show in the world. But it used to be a guy who saw Steve Martin live when he was like 20. So now he's 70 years old with a wacky tie at the open mic going, hey. Dude, I remember someone in Toronto and there were like this comic and he had all these bits,

but he had all this produce that he needed. and then it's like all his food kept like spoiling this i can't remember someone told me about this this guy would like do these like bits and like but it was all these like fucking carrot top shit but he would like go grocery shopping before his act and then someone's like you need to use like food that's not perishable because you know how expensive this is to do like just dripping this that's funny though just ice cream dripping all over the place and then i remember like our buddy rick raleigh he was like at an open mic and then he was doing some joke where he had a box of cereal as like a gag and i go wait you're bringing a

locks a cereal every time you do stand-up now. Yeah, good point, that's stupid. There's a legend that used to say, had a joker. He was like, it's my Apple headphones and it was two apples. Oh, yeah, yeah, literally two apples taped to head-phing. A legend. I kind of like that, though. Nothing wrong with that.

Food stuff I'm good with, coincidentally. Yeah, yeah, but you'd hate it if he was on Kill Tony. And you'd be like, what? Yes, yes, yeah. You want to see them in a basement with four people watching. Yeah. If you think about it, though, okay, so if you think about like the 80s, the era where, like, Bill Hicks was coming out in like the trench coat, like smoking a cigarette era, that was

probably like near the end where people start getting wacky. And it's not just, if you think music, I feel like the end of the 80s is when like Kiss came, all the costumes. Yeah. Gallagher. The end of like an era of a moment, which it feels like the end of a bit of a moment and who knows what happens next, but doesn't it feel like a little bit that is that time where it's like, okay, everyone's kind of bored of the thing. And you're like, okay, what if I'm a pizza? Well, you're also very good at seeing like trends and and like breaking down stuff observationally as it happens.

Thank you, appreciate it. You're so great. Call him. I talk to you outside. I don't know I compliment the man in front of me. I know on the conference podcast. I know, you're such a genius. I was about to call him a fuck and you can't be out.

No, no, no. You didn't let him get to the punchline. Sure. No. Johnny bloop that out. Oh, you can't say the N-word around here? No, you've, you know those weird rules. You guys have changed.

Dude, that's so. say the last one. You're the podcast is too cool. You bleep out compliments? What was that? You know, I've always wanted to say this to you? Every slur is still in.

Now, I think what it is, like, okay, these comics who are like, L.A. retarts go like, all right, well, L.A. is over. Let's go where I can go get famous where the money is. There's a fucking lottery printing tickets down there in Austin, right? But they all think this thing is gay of, like, fucking, let's just be a mouthpiece

for power and, fucking let's let's suck like suck off JD vans publicly I mean that's a high way of speaking of a guy dressed like a pizza but this is what I'm saying but so they go how can I not be that but still work in this place I can't do the other thing and go actually I'll take the

other angle so they go I'll instead dress up like a fucking pizza. I don't think that's completely wrong but I would say that I would add to it there's a scenario where you have a lot of people that are like three four years in and you're getting shined so it's like what's a way like if you're 22 years old you can't compete at being like guys that have been

doing this for 15 years but you can be more different yes and more interesting you know what else I've seen so there's another guy who's that's like blowing up down there and he's it's all a character he's just doing bombs his name's Mohammed Mohammed

he's running for mayor right now actually the character they play is they're all just turning into Jeff what's the fucking fuck just Dunham Characters what if I was the puppet what instead of being a puppeteer, I'm just the puppet.

They're all coming out, go, oh. Someone's, someone, yeah, Mohammed the Tellalist. Well, then I'd better put my hand up your ass. Oh. So, sure. Wait, where are we going with this?

We're not going anywhere. Oh, this guy, uh, the haters ball. The leaps haters ball. We'll just name off people and then you do like a five-minute hating. He just stole dice. Yeah, yeah, he just stole dice. And he also stole the most famous bit from the office.

Yeah. So he goes like... But dice was kind of like ridiculous at the time, you know? Yeah, but it's like the most famous comedy character ever So he stole that And two things Blown up off of it

And then if you go look at his channel It's all like He tried just doing normal stand-up He failed at it for three years And went, I can't do it another three years I saw an interview with him And he was actually pretty funny in my opinion This is the thing

I'm sure he's actually like a funny guy But the point I'm making is like They go oh I can't like All of us We failed for three years We weren't doing well on stage yet And we went All right let's keep going

Time to retire the pizza costume. Okay. Liam Neeson. We hang on and we love enough. The dry cleaners fucking lost my pizza costume. Running around town. You kept going?

No, a hamburger won't do. Someone has that bit already. He shows up. He shows up. He's supposed to eat pepperoni. Your closet is all mascot food. I'm a plain cheese. I'm actually jealous of that.

I'd love to wear a costume. Dude, if I just if I was a cheese slice, I would fucking crush. You don't think Guar came at the end of like an era of that type of music? And there was probably like The Leve of the era just being like These guys are spraying come everywhere

Like when I come from we play real music I don't mind Guar Because you're not in that industry If you're a musician you would absolutely hate that This is just one particular Mainstreamy style of comedy There's actually more comedians now That are making points I think than ever before

You know There's all of the things always When you say like things are going away I think it's just movie in society now the cultures are all just kind of like little it's like more nichey pockets yeah it's just a real niche you know so the mainstream

is getting watered down you know no I know there's loads of comics you're scratching their chin telling you about poverty or whatever but they're not making an there's like more them now than ever yeah you are right there's more comics than ever but there is like a there is just like a window of when people sort of just get like sick of shit yeah in America especially and my opinion

is the seven years this is the seven years seems like it I'd be at eight right now. You see me tonight. I'm only on stage tonight. We were like a fake bow and an arrow going through my head. I'm like, whoa! It's like, Ryan's big short.

It's gonna be like 10 years from now and he's like, I'm telling you it's crashing at any moment. The difference is it doesn't end that. He's playing the drums. He's playing the drums. He's going, I promise you, he's got to crash. One man band, he's got the symbols on his head. It doesn't make sense.

It's the end of an era. Well, it doesn't go away anymore, because people used to be like, you know, there'd be this big band and then you just goes it He don't see them anymore. Now the guy goes away and he still has his seven million followers. So eight years later, you're like, what's that guy be doing? And he's like, you know, he's playing his drums in a...

It's still... So the people don't go away anymore the way they used to. So I don't know what happens, but there is like an appetite from people that goes away a bit. What scares me is just that creatively, these guys are like, I'm failing for 10 years for them is not an option. They go, I failed for three, now I'm putting on the pizza. Yeah. They make that...

I mean, Larry the cable guy... Yeah, exactly. Exactly. Fucking was just like trudging it out. What's the difference? He goes, what if I'm a fucking Southern Cable guy? And they go, you're the most famous community. I don't blame anyone who believes it's either this or quitting.

You're right? And they go, fuck it. I'm dressing up as mother, Teresa, and I'm punting little black babies into the audience. Can I use that, by the way? No, because tonight's making his kill Tony debut. You're doing that for 13 people. Callum, Teresa! I'm just punting, like,

very expensive black babies. Huge point by Danny Paul Shuck from Larry the cable guy. I've got nothing. We'll edit that out. Well, here's the thing is, Larry the Cable Guy and Dice became successful on those characters.

Those characters are now... Yeah, Dice wasn't always the character either. Sure, but those characters are now retired. That's what we're saying. So I can't just show up and start doing Larry the Cable Guy. I think you can. No, I got to be like... From what I've seen on Kill,

Tony I think you can't well we're sure we're saying every podcast into the hares ball you started this I didn't have to bring it up you're right I didn't have to bring it up you're right I thought we're going to talk about fucking trans women or whatever you talk about

here yeah what you're in a central bank or whatever you I did bring it up what happened you set me up you're like a fucking oh

every other every other guest comes in here and then they read off like tweets from a wick in Oklahoma, right? And then they come in there. Oh, we have witches from Oklahoma. Don't worry. I was only today on the way here.

I was like, damn, like, I don't know. I haven't been keeping up with the news. I don't know what I'm going to do on that show. I have a list of people. I name them off and then you hate on them for three minutes. That works. Stephen Colbert. I live right by that building.

And every day I walk by so glad that it's fucking, they're going to demolish it. You're not joining the protests to keep them on the air? Dude, again. Being too into any side politically is so fucking gay. Yeah. It's the sad for comedy. Rogan is like one end of it and Colbert's the other.

They're the same thing. It's like my only problem is like, and again, I don't even dislike Rogan. Like, I have no issue with the guy. But if you're doing- That's not true. He hates him. Just to be clear, off my key,

never stops complaining about Joe Roggan. Just so you know, this is him being a corporate. This is him playing that. He's literally like, you know, my fucking gardener would have been deported if it wasn't for Joe Rogan. He fucking hates Rogan. He's lying. If you're going to do Fox News, at least, like, know your Fox News.

My only thing is he's like, how is this show politically biased? What are you talking about? It's like, then he'll list off, he'll be like, fucking, what's his face? The Ukrainian president. Zelensky? He'll be like, Zelensky wanted to come on. I go, absolutely fucking not. And it's like, all right, well, that alone is like, you can tell him cockfights

available if he's interested. Nettie? I'm not even saying you have to have him on. The netster? The netster? He's in the group chat sometimes. He's like, he chimes in sometimes. Netanyat is the guy who comes in to the group chat,

maybe like four weeks. So that's using the group chat the whole time. Austin is going through shit, dude. What is this alt comedy? Anyways, I guess my broader point was like even, call him last time we talked, you're on like a bit of a health kick. You know what I mean? I'm all health kick, guys.

Which my point was, and elaborate, but I was saying that it was like, it does feel like the era of just the, like, fucking drunk degenerate alcoholic that's actually successful. I can't think of very many. Shane doesn't have the darkness. The darkness is a cardinal component. He's like, this is a little fun. Yeah, that's true. He's like, this was back when I was a fun alcoholic.

Yeah. You know your friend who's a fun alcoholic? I think that. And then they turn into like the Mark Maron. Or the, the, yeah, you get grumpy. Yeah, you get grumpy. Hung over constantly. You haven't drank water in years.

And then you quit and you're equally, you're more grumpy somehow. Yeah, that's true. That's the worst thing about quitting alcohol. I know. It's worse? You're not drinking alcohol? No, no, I quit every month or stuff. He's speculating.

I give it a little try. Yeah, that's fine. You know, I don't live there, but I'm... Yeah, that's fine. Take a little break. Yeah. I think the, like, if you take the wrestlers back in the day, even those guys right now, if you look at them,

like, every wrestler is, like, actually pretty healthy. they're not like it's like it's like that like uh there used to be the baseball players that would be like drunk and smoking like it feels like in a weird way the whole world has gotten like lost a place for like the psychopath party guys that is true the only in the party guys they just know about that stuff like in the 80s those wrestlers they didn't even think of yeah so knowledge isn't power it makes things worse uh in some ways i suppose but those guys those wrestlers are probably like yeah i want to do this for fucking 25 years these guys are not have like a steroid-related heart attack,

like every old guy, like Hulk Hogan or whatever. You know, I don't want to do coke off a dead woman's fucking body after this. I want to go back to my mansion. I think part of it was those guys were in such rough shape. Sorry, continue. That's what they used to get into wrestling was like, I want to do coke off a dead woman's body after I get it.

They were like carnies. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But that's also what we're in. It's the fucking outcast business. It's like guys who love listening to Outcast. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's our target market. that's our niche

that's what this used to be is like Regie you are right though it's all like all the people there's like 26 year old selling out theaters who are like a vegan

who's never said anything funny talk meditates yeah yeah it's all health it's just a new era to do it's all about health and fucking self

improvement and fucking yeah but let's go through phases there was a phase in the 80s where like they had some big health and wellness phase

in the 80s and then you know was there yeah there was like there was like there was a I think it was a crazy like You know, you see all those chicks and the aerobics.

They're wearing all those, like, fucking, those chicks, the aerobics videos and stuff. The, Jane fun of the shit. It's like health became very popular, and then it's just, everything goes, is super cool. I do think that if you survive the next 30 years, which I don't think I will. I hope not. I think you might be able to live 200 years. I think they're going to figure out fucking, like, slowing cell aging and all the shit. That's really gay.

Yeah, and I'll be just ready available to everyone who can, like, just anyone with an income. If you fucking worked on thumbnails for our podcast, maybe we could afford it one day. That's what's holding us back. That's the problem. That's the make or break. It's getting that 5.1% click-through rate versus those 4.4%. It's the thumbnail. It's the thing that's...

Do you want to live forever or not? No one on their deadbed regrets making thumbnails. What the fuck? It is moving fast on that. But that's the worst if it hits at like 85 where they're just like, we figured out of you not age anymore. It's like so you can be 87 forever. Can I go backwards or go now? I guess I'll just die.

Everyone else can, but you can't. I can't be able to a good solution for society. I think we should have a mandatory cutoff for the age. So that everyone... No matter what. Everyone dies at 70 if you live to 70. And then that's just... You get five years of retirement then.

No, you retire younger, you're fucking idiot. Obviously, you don't just wait until... Oh, I'm sorry. You just fucking assume that. Well, I can't afford to retire. You didn't explain your platform, dude. Well, obviously, think about it, you fat fucking retard. Right? Just one second.

One second, give a thought. Well, I don't have a thought. in this hypothetical scenario. Maybe if you set the big version, you went down. You're a moron. You're stupid. You're stupid. That was really stupid.

You're like a stupid guy. That's on me? You should apologize if anything. That's a fucking stupid idiot. How do you not know that you're going to retire earlier if you got killed in 70? Obviously. Yes. You can work till 65 if you want.

I'm out of there. We've got five years. You're in Europe. My life's married to the grind. He goes, well, I'm not retiring regardless. I love it. And how do we get, how do we dispatch of these? 70-year-olds. I'm not exactly sure about that, but I'm willing to listen.

Just pick them up at their house on their 70th, like on their, what a shitty 70th birthday present. No, but everyone knows. You turn 70 and then just like, yeah, the guy's coming to kill you. I think it's like a coming of age ritual when you turn 16, they give you a 70-year-old to take out because you're taking his place essentially. I like that. And then that's how you became a man when you crack the neck of a 70-year-old. And the movie is the 16-year-old falls in love with the 70-year-old. He's supposed to kill them, but he's not. No, it's his grandma. He's like, I can't kill my grandmother, and then he has to hide her like, Aunt Frank.

Solves two problems. You don't have to take your boys on a trip and kill homeless people anymore. Yeah. This is like the giver. Well, in my mind, it would actually kind of be like a beautiful ceremony. We'd all accept that. And, you know, it would be like, oh, it's grandma, she's done to die soon. We have to dip her into the lava.

And grandma's like, I'm not going to die soon. No, you're, you're forced to die soon. And we all have, like, and we get to, we get to enjoy. I love college. He's like, he's like, I have this brilliant. original idea. It's what the Vikings did for thousands of years and I watched midsummer.

What did they do? Kill people? When they get old, they jump up a fucking giant rock and kill themselves. I know that's in midsummer, but I thought that was like a fictional I actually have ten more years. Give it up for Grandma! Last Day on Earth! I read a five key yesterday. Yeah, my mind, it was going to be like a nice beautiful thing for everybody. And then you'll

also achieve a lot of your stuff because you're not going to sit around thinking, oh, someday I'll go to Europe. You'll just go do it because you're going to die. Right. But in the reality is, is knowing the government it's going to just be like some fucking 19 year old comes over with a hammer yeah it's like at least yeah

we accidentally killed a 60 year old my bed yeah some stones my spreadsheets were wrong some Danny orders online every night is a 19 year old a hammer it's not bad

that was great Danny's gay that was great now we have a title Danny's gay actually is pretty funny that you're like Nancy Pelosi

Oh I'm like Nancy Pelosi's husband's boyfriend And that's another thing man What's up with that man Yeah He's working on the impressions Love's getting into the impression game God damn That's even just like being a royal family

Where they just did a I don't know if you saw they did Prince Andrews They released a biography Of Prince Andrews You know Prince Andrew I was in Ireland You're tapped into that stuff with them, right? Well, apparently it was like the Prince Andrew documentary

is him just like non-stop running through chicks. This happened this week. And they basically, they were like all these hotel staff where like he would come to like a hotel in like Singapore or whatever. And they said in one weekend, 40 different prostitutes came in and out. And it's like, yeah, like Prince Andrews was just laying it down. But at that point you're not even. Fuck, you're like, they're coming in and you're going, nah, or something.

Or you're like, or you're just getting a naked girl to like clean your fucking bed or something. I mean, you have all the money in the world. It's just like you... 40 prostitutes.

Actually, the novelty kind of just wrote for it. Yeah, I think at that point you're not fucking them. You're doing something.

A girl comes in, you do Asian face at her just to get a buzz. Yeah. No, they come in and you run a type 5. And they go, hmm, all right,

a new audience. And he's lashing out minutes. That's so funny. He's doing his own Kilted in a house. He's auditioning in. He's working his way up to Kiltone

by practicing different minutes. Yeah, bringing in different prostitutes to do a set for them he's trying to do improv but he's scared like do it with the team he's two hookers so wait he has a autobiography coming out

no someone released a biography a big scandal this week and it was just like he's the ultimate dog they need to kill because it's tied in with the Epstein stuff right but he didn't sweat so obviously that was like yeah and they said in the book that it was like Epstein knew that Prince Andrew was just like super easy to manipulate

and he knew he could make him his bitch and get him to do whatever he wants and once he had a royal family that he can get everyone else yeah anyways the royal family's fighting against the book but it is out and people are reading it which one's Andrew he's the one that got was on the older one the what he's the one with the photo with virginia goffrey yeah yeah that's what i thought yeah and then for some crazy reason he went on tv to like plead his innocence and it was the worst he said he can't sweat well the facts are that i'm actually not i couldn't sweat for that week yeah yeah because i had shell shock he's like i have some condition where i don't sweat

like i guess she was just sweating right now he's like well it was back down yeah yeah i got over it Yeah, it's not a good... It was the craziest thing. It was not a good thing to say. And he said it was Photoshopped and all this type of stuff. Yeah, and then they gave her $10 million just to quiet her up. And then they killed her. I'm surprised the royal family haven't just whacked him.

I'm surprised they haven't. I think it's too obvious. I don't think that's like... They used to be able to do that, but I think now... They used to be able to just send your way. It's too hard of a move. Well, it's hard to get past those guards that stay... I mean, think about it.

They did Diana and think about all the stuff that caused. That is true. Yeah. Now, they wanted to make him go away, but it's not working very good. Yeah, he's just in Singapore We did We did a They tried to give him AIDS

With the Filipino hookers We did a Q&A on our podcast And we had like a few We just did it before you guys came But we did a we had a few other ones What I felt like it would be funny for here The first one is I don't know if you're following

You must be following this one But like do you think that Bridget McCrone has a dick or not It's a question for love And would you suck it? I'll answer the second part of your question first Ryan We absolutely would suck it. We?

Yeah, me and Collin. Okay. I know him to get jealous. Calm, any thoughts on Bridget McCarn's peace or a vagina? Defoe, definitely a man. Definitely a man. 100%. And a groomer.

It's the age gap is the problem. The age gap is what sends it alarm out. It's Paris. It's like it's France. I get it. They don't believe it. So you get a 13 year old when you're 50. No big.

Genitalia. Snails, whatever. It's a very open society. I get it. Yeah, yeah. Open to. Yeah, that's why it's like not a scandal there. Because it's.

They don't. They don't care. They go, of course, yeah. Of course we are. They're coming down. So basically, Lev, you don't know what's happening, but the royal family is suing. I know about this. Okay, you know.

So, yeah, and then now the French government is actually suing. Is this whole thing, though, just like a thing Candace Owen started to pivot? Possibly. I think there were some rumors about this before, but she's her best work. I don't think she's going to put all, like, that much focus on it, though, if she's going to be able to get sued to oblivion. I think she might go down with the ship. You get in deep at some point.

She's nuts, man. She's going out with the show. So this is the president of France's wife. Was his teacher. Was his teacher? And it's like 30 years old of them. That's the real crime. Dating a broad 30 years older than you?

Something's weird. That's the scandal. Hey, I'm looking. I'm reading into stuff because that is it. That's a canary in the fucking. I don't think she's a dude with a dick. But I do think that clearly a groomer for sure. But as a groomer.

you're 15 I like to smash the T-Jub Now when a man grooms a woman That's like life Yeah That's like that's a tale is oldest When a woman grooms a man It should be like a ticket

It's like fucked up that It's a misdemeanor You go a little weird But yeah Here's your $80 ticket Come on Yeah If you do it again

It's gonna move up to 200 Be better Be better Be better Date somebody your own age Wait so what the theory is That she had a brother Who died or something

No she had a sister Who died And then he's the bride He took over, yeah, the brother took over as... Which, why? Why would you do? Why does that need to be done? Because they're freaks.

And it's the woke mind virus. But don't you think this is also, like, the fact that Candace is on, like, all these shows now talking about this. Like, she's on, like, Tucker Carlson's... It's a wild moment. You're saying the comedy got wacky? Think about politics. Yeah, like, it's like, that thing is now in everything, where it's like, let's just put on the freaks. Dude, the second episode of Tucker Carlson's show is.

some meth head who's like, I sucked off Obama. Yeah, yeah. The world is the Jerry Springer show now. It's crazy. They found him. Yeah, it is. The whole world is just, the whole world is just like, look at this, look at this, look at this.

Look at this. The whole world is just. People distracting you with shit, well, then you get like an advert for like a fucking phone case. And we're bitching that we're like, it's not deep investigative journalism or something real, but it's like we probably wouldn't watch that anyway. I'm fine with the type of investigative journal.

It's actually more on my level. all the wacky scandals that are going on. Sure. Sometimes it gets a little too deep and you're just like, okay, you know what I mean? Yeah. Let's keep it light, boys. Yeah, that's fair. Okay.

Lev, you had a bet recently where you had to lose some weight. What is this? The fuck the ambush podcast? No, this isn't the ambush podcast. Mani, you've got easier questions than this. The reason I brought it up is because they said, oh, Zemping masturbation explained by people who take the drug and they are claiming that people lost interest in masturbating

in sex. And didn't you take the Ozmpic for a second? I didn't take Ozempic, but I'm still suffering from that side effects. I wonder if you have it unrelated. I think my girlfriend's been slipping me Ozepic just so I don't fucker. I'm not. But the other side's not working. That was a big thing

that was in the podcast. A lot of articles and we had a Reddit thread where it was just like, there's a whole Reddit thread of dudes that say they have like, it's called dead bedrooms. And it's just dudes being like, that's one year mark having had sex and everyone's like hang in there, brother. And it's just like all Oh, yeah, I came across

Dead Bedrooms Society Pretty funny, right? Yeah, I guess And then his wife's like, can you clean the garage? She's like, yeah, as long as we can just have sex first She's like, no, yeah, don't worry about it. Yeah, there's a couple of guys that have figured out They're just like, yeah, you can actually

My girl said she has a headache, so I tell her that, you know, you know what cure his headaches is sex, all of a sudden, the headache's gone. But also, yeah, sex are making me dinner. Just keep listing things you want around the house. It's sex or quit the grass? or make me dinner. Oh, your choice.

And then on top of that, there was like one or two girls in the thread. And then every single girl was like, please stop sending me dick pics. I did not come in this thread. Yeah, that's so funny. She's like, my husband hasn't touched me in yours and then just so freak.

What are this? I got something for you. It is so hard. You have any advice for the dead bedroom, guys? I'm in a dead bedroom. What do you mean? But is it on your dead bedroom's on your record? Oh, yeah.

No, I think it's part because I've gotten so fat that... I'm listening. See less fat, though. Dude, I'm ballooning. I had 9,000 calories yesterday. How do you eat 9,000 calories in a day? Stop.

Tell me what that looks like. All right. For lunch, I went out. Wait, you're tracking your calories. Yeah. That's crazy. At like 7,000. Like, the idea that you're even...

Like, Chick-fil-A does not go in the app. The rules are, that's a cheap meal. You don't even look at it. You're literally going, better get a burger king. Like, I've tracked my calories before and when I have like a bad day, I just at some point I go, this day's a right-up, I'm not tracking. What are you going to make it up

on Sunday somehow? No, I'm just, this is a record for when I die at a year. You're just curious? He tracks calories like steps, you know? He's like, oh, 9,000. Oh, it's almost midnight. I better get out, really.

I got to get a quick walk into McDonald's. I have seen you take down like 1,800 calories, then some drinks at, like, midnight. Oh, easy, easy. Like, just like the soda. You ate 9, you actually 9th? Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'd love to hear them.

As three not fat fucks, this is so exciting. It's two and a half, not fat fuck. Three thousand calorie day is a lot. Like, three thousand would be if I was I was both and I'm at the gym and you're drinking. Drink booze. If I only ate 3,000 a day.

Food doesn't count. That's crazy. It's true, though. You would be losing weight. Booze has an asterisk beside it. So I woke up, I walked over to the Chipotle. What time did you go to bed and what time did you wake up? I woke up at probably two.

2 p.m. This was early. And what was the bed time? I love how I just went on a thing saying that things are getting healthier. It's like, what I'm going to do that? My first 3,000 dollars is an iconic class. It's just like everything. The rich are getting rich and poor, getting poor. The fat are getting fire.

It's just, we're all. Healthy are getting healthier. The middle size is. The middle size is gone. So I went to bed at 10 a.m. That's fucking, dude. So first off, like, this is for sure like a crazy hormone. Going to bed at 10 a.m.

Dude, your hormones must be insane because, like, that is the number one thing. If you're not, like, if you're not a prison guard is fucking nuts. Dude, they always say that. Like, if you have a bad sleep schedule, you eat really bad. Yeah. Because your decision making is bad. So that's, you think that's the, the first part of his hormones. I bet if he did like a blood panel, they'd be like, this shit's off the charts on a million things.

So that means also, Lev sees the sunrise and goes, all right, better get the bed in four hours. Yeah, that's so bad. Like the birds are whistling. And Leve goes, all right, four more hours. And then the person, the person standing behind Lev says, I guess there's no sun today. Sorry, buddy I'm so sorry, dude I crossed the line

You were a cheap shot You're right We were actually trying to empower men And that was my bad I'm on your side I think you can I was rooting for you I threw money in when the bet was happening

Okay so you suffered four hours Yeah For like three days in the last week Because you're going to France I'm going to Europe yeah They're opening a burger Which by the way Just a little

Roy out Want you for the grand opening? A little piece of advice You don't need to do it for four days You deprive your sleep or yourself asleep just the night before Fell, it's time to talk about Miandis.

We all know the summer is amazing, sunshine, road trips, beach days, but we can, can we be honest for a second here? Because it also means one thing, sweat. If you're not wearing the right pair of underwear, it gets real uncomfortable, real fast. That's why I swear by Miandis. We're talking micromotal fabric. It's legit, magic, super soft, breathable, somehow stays on even when it's 90 degrees, and your AC's losing the battle, you're sweating, but you don't have problems down below.

They got everything, briefs, boxers, cheeky cuts, bralettes, you name it, plus their summer prints are ridiculously fun. We're talking tropical vibes, popsicles. Even pool floaties, your underwear drawer deserves a vacation too. I'm wearing them right now. Me too. It's hot out. It gets hot out, and they got the micromotal fabric.

Head on over to Miandis. If you haven't, they got prints for everyone, style for everyone, unmatched comfort, responsibly sourced. Miandis is their signature super soft micromotal fabric is briefed. stretchy, comfy. It's ideal for all day wear. If you need something even more breathable for the summer proof, check out the Move Me Line with the Breathe Fabric, which has moisture wicking anti- odor technology perfect for working out. Just keep an extra cool in those sweltering days. Who loves me undies? More than 30 million pairs are sold. So 90,000 five-star reviews. If you

haven't checked it out, now is the time. Makes a perfect gift. And I'm happy to have a whole bunch of in my drawer right now. So right now as a listener of this show, you can score sizzling summer deals like up to 50% off at Miundi's. Exactly. Meundies.com slash boyscast. Use the code boys cast. That is meundies.

com slash boys cast with the promo code boys cast for up to 50% off. Meundi's comfort that's made for summer. My life is chaos, dude. I'm not faking the fun. Let's get into this. It's, my life is every day is a battle between two sides of me.

One size. He's such a gay piece of shit. I mean, you look like you got six times. You just say some of the weirdest things. Inside of me are two wolves. One's a big fat fucking dumb wolf. And the other one is a tiny little healthy wolf. It's a healthy, dumber wolf.

He's a very timid and passive kitty cat. There's a fun guy who likes to go on stage, be silly. And then there's a dark guy that you don't even want to get to know. I wouldn't recommend your worst enemy. You spend time with this. One part stand up. Two parts. Burt.

Inside me, there's a guy, and inside there there's a bigger guy. Inside that, there's also another bigger guy. Russian doll situation. Oh, this has been a guy inside me, right? Just that dumb. The fuck you're saying there's a guy inside me. You don't have to answer to me. Okay, okay.

So every day, like tomorrow I will change my life. I will become the health guy tomorrow. I need order. I need to. Can't do it. I need order. I go order. next thing you know

I fucking balls Nevis some dim sum We need to order in here combo number three Dim sum's not even that unhealthy Yeah like I'll be talking to a trader And he's like we'll see it's a combination I'm like oh combination

I go to Pandexpress This is my day yesterday Can you just do word association with anything And then you just go Wendy's see what you can do with that do you like Wendy's yeah Wendy's the best one

almost you like Wendy's nuts hit your chin there you go there you're old classic alright so I woke up go to Chipotle I go there so often he waddles down the street to but Chipotle's healthy

he's also like in the way you go crazy but like it's like imagine being an alcoholic and you're like you're on like the fucking like Vegas strip or something that's like where he lives in New York it's just Chick-filet right these everywhere you turn

you've ever heard of a grocery store that's on the other block that's on the other block it's groceries that's gross in the name see they've ended appropriately if that's how you smell you smell it gross

groceries it's so funny I love lefsees of salad that reminds me and now he's eating chicken leg what are the two sides of you again Okay, listen Both of my sons

It's just one big side Spilling out of this chair But It's the dark side And the bright side This is more interesting Than the Ozempic article So I woke up

Go to Chipotle I'm there so much So the other day The guy stops me And he goes You really got to get on the rewards Yeah And I go

It's just fiscally you're responsible I go what? He goes Dude you're here every day You got to get on the rewards You're like it's crazy that you're not. So I'm like, all right, I think about it.

I got on the rewards program, right? I'm getting a free bowl every two days. Fuck. So this is my bowl. Double white rice. No beans, because I'm a health freak. Double chicken. What?

Caso. Pico, sour cream, cheese guac. Why do you double white rice? Because I need to feel somewhat full. I used to do that and a burrito. But the white rice is like you should be doing a salad or something. Just why don't you do more beans and less rice? Beans actually.

What do you have against beans? Don't like them. Like even here. I don't think they should be in a bowl or a burrito. I think it's a Mexican food. All they eat is rice and beans. No one cares what you think

should or should not be in a but it's like that is like the Mexican state of rice and I don't think beans should be in there. Rice and beans. I don't think they should be in there. The only thing I like is the refried bean with the cheese. So that was my lunch. That's about 1,700 calories.

So this is after we do a podcast. You can't do like sour cream instead of queso? I'll do both. But you can't just do instead? That's not that's worse I could technically That's not how you're living right now

Yeah Because it's so much like cream It's like real slop bowl at that point Yeah it's a horrific nightmare I sent pictures of it to people Like go and look how good this bowls And they go they don't ever send me that again Unsubscribe

It's off pudding And then at night I ordered A lot of dim sum I got fucking shrimp shoe mine You just went from right in the middle To later at night That's what happened in those six hours between Yeah this is within a five hour

window and it's a whole thing of shrimp shu-mai, two whole things of chicken and pork dumplings, uh, fucking chicken lo-main. Eat that and I'm like, you having a party, sir? I'm like, I'm still not told. It comes to like 15 fucking colories coloris sets, like some free prawns and shit.

Oh, that's always the worst. Can I get the party? Can I get the party platter for seven? You guys don't know me at all. So that I had that. And then I was still up at seven in the morning. So I go, ooh, who, breakfast.

time. Oh, guess what's opening for breakfast? Everything is... Lev likes the idea that places are opening for breakfast. If I wait up in the hour. I got a chick-fil-A. You're a chick-fil-A for breakfast? Eight in the morning.

Back-to-back same time that day. Oh, no, no, it's because the first time was Chapal-A. This is the same day. In my 24-hour, we do... Have you considered, like, a bowl of cereal at some point? No. You eat out every single meal? Every meal, yeah.

That's crazy. It's crazy. You just don't have... What's in your fridge? Just your girl's shit? my girlfriend's head. I'm bringing our body to France. But Lev's so far past it that it's like none of this

like, hey, why don't you just try like, you know, yeah, an avocado for, you know, none of this is ever going to, Lev is fucked. But I mean, like, Leff is like fucking industrial, like, needs to be trained. Not going to make it to the 70. Giant boulder and just not allowed to eat at him, but, like, peas for a fucking.

The poor boulder. No, you're fucked. You should have. Fuck! Grubhub should be taken away from you on probation or something I actually do kind of think that when you're this fat the government should step in

Like they should just like force me away Roll you off a fucking cliff Like RFK should put you in The way that they take like a super homeless person And put them in like a facility A drug addict You have to go on detox Why don't you have like a muckbang YouTube channel

Or you go the other way That's the thing you're on your two people Are on two paths right now right? I hate the idea eating on stream is insane to me and also take hours. Why? You'd have to slow down to talk. You'd have to fill in them every now and again. Can you good muck bang?

I think that's so gross. At least monetize your munties. Yeah, do you? Yeah. That's a private thing. That's like more private. I'd rather have sex on camera than fucking show what I'm eating. He think, he's like, it's a real, like to him eating is like an intimate act. Like to him, that's like being addicted to jerk at all.

You do a muck bang, you wear kind of like a low cut top, show some cleavage, just like eat a bunch of... Do you have to have muck bang? names like do they call each other like like let the destroyer like yeah just fat man joe or whatever like you know like they have like fat names a lot of them are Asian oh really yeah huge so you just had the three meals yeah I mean no snacking no snacking but the chick filet I mean we're talking to four item order what do you get at 7 a.m. a chick fillet two chicken biscuits that hash scrambled burrito and I tried the new grilled chicken egg stop trying anything new that's that's definitely you're not

new stuff, Danny. They told me there's a barbecue thing covered. It's funny the way you say that. Obviously, I had to try the new... This guy's basically Homer Simpson. The idea that you show up, the new things are always like the worst thing you've ever fucking seen. You show up a Wendy's and they're doing like brisket or something and you're like, there's no way

I'm getting the breakfast. And you're going, I'm getting the breakfast. The burger that's two burgers put together. Danny was a former fat so I feel like Danny actually is the guy to take advice from on it. Danny's not still a fat, but he's also a fraud. No, Danny's fat. Don't fat.

Stop. That's not fat. You didn't see him before. No, Danny was like three bills, right? Danny is fat. I've been as high as probably like. That's how Jews measure weight. You have three bills, Danny.

Three bills. I'd probably been as high as like 260. Okay. That's my goal. I would love to be down at 260. And I'd still be fat at 260. Yeah. Yeah.

Okay. But Danny is like, this is the scale of society. We should all be doing this story to Danny. Yeah. That's like, you shouldn't be, you should, you should be dead. and we should be we should be talking to Danny about how fatty is we should be going how to fuck do you even get like he's he was that's the size you know that's the size at all but Leav is so big that people like you can just walk around going I'm not

like a healthy America and then he goes I'm not fucking I'm not like a couch or whatever the fucking next step up is who's bigger yeah I'm not blunts I'm not big enough to monetize it but I'm that's fun is interesting the column's gotten healthier you're drinking less I drink pores are good noticeably better looking I said that to say you were about I said that to you last time I saw you I said the guy's been in the gym so you guys are going the opposite directions

because Lev last time I saw you you were getting in shape too But I was never I was Be You can't have to leave all that out And then over In post you dub

So you're gay and ugly too Huh? But Other parts of Lev's You know The comedy act is coming along Fucking crushing it on stage However

Road jokes on Shane Gillis's roast on ESPN Yeah, that was fun. Thank you. With the ESPs? Yeah, I was proud of them. That's a big fucking thing writing for the SB's. I got another writing gig right now.

Things are cooking. You're ordering at a self-surf? Yeah, my custom notes on the bowl, on the pokey bowl. Also, I can't announce it yet, but it's a really cool thing that I'm doing. No, you're cooking, again, no pun intended. There's a food reference to every comment. Dandy everything he does is based around food, too. That's what happens, right?

Except for his content. No food content. Yeah. I do, you know, how are you not monetizing this? Dude, monetizing is gay. It's fucking gay. I'd rather just, like, do nothing forever. He already here, I'm a fat piece of shit for the love of the game. Well, he's trying to dispel the image that Jews like money.

Yeah, you know, money's gay. That's so funny. That's funny, do you got to the point where everything's gay, including money. I don't want to turn my fucking eating into a job. Once I got rich and I had over $5,000. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Now it's time to get rich in calories. I'm like the joker.

I like blight money on fire now. This town deserves a fatter class of criminal. I'm like burning money with Crisco. We're making fat jokes. I know. I'm aware. It would be funer. I would like to be fat for just the jokes.

Oh, dude, if you guys like actually became... I could do it. I can do it. If you guys, Johnny can do it for you. If you guys actually became like that sketch you guys do where you're the fat dude, it's like, there's nothing funnier than that. You guys would be the funniest as people.

Being fat is hilarious. It's funny to watch and see. I'm sure about getting up in the morning would be pain, like, you know, standing on public transport or whatever. It also is so funny that in this... Being wet all the time. You're like wet all the time. That's like, there's like...

I get it. One thing is that you're funnier. To be out of the people. Not too anyone that knows you or loves you. Everyone except your wife is saying. Yeah, you're funnier two strangers who want to see you fail. I mean, the craziest thing about getting super, because I see it all the time,

and I, like, the people who, like, you get so fat and you're like, you can't walk anymore just only because of how fat you got. It's like, that's crazy. The camera zoomed out. I'm in a power chair. I saw a guy actually today just when I, like, when I was leaving here or whatever,

and I was like, literally, you're like, you're so fat, you can't walk. And then at that point, you're like, it might be so hard to just, like, get to yourself to be able to walk again. yeah well once they give once they take away once they give you the scooter

you're fucked yeah because like that little bit of that little bit of waddling that you might have done was doing something that little bit of waddling was a lot and now you're completely just embraced we go I'm so fat I don't need legs

and you don't realize I'm taking away your legs I mean they're taking your legs they're taking your feet at least they come around and knock in the door and they go we're taking away your legs yeah sorry and you're like thank you

handing your legs and you're like thank you I love those shows of the doctors are like mean to the fat people. They're like, you know, you can't walk anymore because if you do, we'll lose Rhode Island. Like, I don't want to lose Rhode Island. It's like fat fucks.

What is there, is there a number or size that you have? Seapelt extender? I'll take a number seven. No. Is there a number or size that if you ever if you ever hit, if you ever hit, what's your like limit? My, what are you in now?

I'm probably, what's your rock bottom? You must have that kind of in mind. Probably like, if I need to get on a scale. Once I get back from Europe, I'm going to, like, really try to lock it in the post office. The Bronx Zoo on a Wednesday because it's free. The fish market. Sort of jump in the Grand Canyon. A bunch of Chinese guys are taking pictures of me of hanging from the fucking, oh, look what

to we capture. I need to, like, lock in when I get back from Europe, but at 3.30 is like my absolute, like, you can't go past 3.30. What are you now? 390 or something. You know what one of the problems is, is that Lev, you know, you got a hot girlfriend. Like, she doesn't seem to be on your ass that much where it's like, you have, you have, oh, she is up your ass. I'm not going to say you, I don't have enough rock bottom stuff.

Yeah, she's doing a marathon right now, yeah. Just to get the remote move around. Love was just a scooter beside her Supported I'm slowly Left left Yeah, Lev folds up beside

I was just like slow down I can't keep up I get distracted By the Popeyes Let's open Left pulls up going When are you going to be home This sounds

What's the funniest thing about Like while I'm eating All this insane shit yesterday I'm on Instagram Like This guy sucks It's guy's This guy's dressed as a fucking peat

Oh I'm like He goes I should order some pizza I earned it I earned it The pizza comic made you go You got distracted

He came back an hour later With a pie Yeah there's a break there If you look at my watch history There's a stop right there His mouth's full of cheese By the way Yeah

I'm like fat Hitler I'm just the worst I'm just the fucking Kind of like King Louis type of thing Where you just sit around Go more shit food Do you think the putting on the way It has made you

More of a hater No no I've always been just a hateful evil little cunt and I think for me food is just like a real comfort and a distraction. I'm just chasing dopamine at all times like if it's not, if it's not food if it's not comedy I'm playing blackjack

like whatever. It's actually a funny story we might have to edit this but I was playing a that was in fucking somewhere the road. Don't you think if you have to edit it before you say it? Yeah before you may give us work to do. You haven't said it yet. Guys let me just give you something that doesn't help to talk at all. That's so

funny. Yeah good. It's name name. That's really funny. Oh, it's you name-dropping names. Yeah, I'll tell you off air. It's very funny. Who was it? Can't you tell us without the names? No, the whole thing is the name.

The names are important. Me and Dave Chappelle. The names are the punch lines. All right. All right. Sorry. Anyway. Okay, well, you have to edit that. Okay, so.

Speaking of pun. So we're looking for dopamine. That's where you're at right now. It's a very dopamine. And stand-up is a very dopamine figure. where you're going out, like you're sort of hunting for stand-up dopamine. I'm like a fat raccoon just chasing highs. You know what happened

is you sort of took your pussy away and you're in a relationship it's like, it's a lot of times. Yes. A lot of the dopamine came from chasing chicks back in the day. That's right. And you take that away. And that's why I was probably skinny then because every night instead of fucking engorging the new Wendy's items. Yeah, I was just banging hoarse.

It's a healthier dopamine than some of the alternatives. Cardio. Yeah, 100%. How do you think your girl would take it if you turn around to and go, just so you know this is you it's your fault look at me this is the worst I've ever been

and you're in my life I can't help notice to do the math before I met you I was great oh crazy here's photos for me

before we met that is weirdly true look at me look at me when I used to fuck everyone right there's a lot of dudes there's a lot of dudes

that you know that you take their pussy away and they end up in a bad way maybe that maybe you fucking nailed it dude I was only skinny

when I was getting pussy well you had to be there was a two year window in my life yeah And now? That fame, that's why fame's bad for some guys,

because there's some guys that are, like, famous rappers or whatever, and they're like, I can get pussy without, without still being, like, a 500-pound guy. Like, Dave Bluntz still gets chicks somehow. But there's,

dude, when you're that fat, there's no way he's still having sex. He thinks he posts with them. His dick is not visible. There's no way he can access his dick. Probably. But you'll see.

You might need, like, one of the girls to hold up the stomach, I guess, but. Yeah. And he'll probably, I think a fuck,

I think a fuck like, I think a fat guy... I bet he'll be skinny at some point. A fat guy like that... Yeah, he's already doing the shit. He's trying to... Whatever. Yeah.

But he has, like, real health issues. A guy... Yeah, but a guy that fat's not even fucking... I think it's more like... There's like a team trying to get in there and they sort of just do a little kind of a... Yeah, they sort of just... I don't know, they touch your cock and the...

Yeah. Like, that's a mess. That's like trying to fuck it. Can't be great. Yeah, like a pile of laundry or something. Like, no... He's not fucking. He's just like...

Under his skirt of skin. You find a chick-fil-a wrapper in there? Yeah. Oh, there's some dead stuff in there. For sure. Rackin. Who knows? A group of kids who are now growing up.

I'm in there looking for leftovers. So why is those empeg off the table then? Didn't they solve it a little bit? I think he has like some moral issue with him. No, I don't want to stab myself with the needle. It's nothing. It's literally painless. He does a version of that.

I do it. It's nothing. Yeah, but you're a junkie. Yeah, he mixes it with his heroin. You're already ejecting It's like a stimp pack and cod Like I don't know I don't want to

I don't see why that's a crazy moral Do you like It's not moral If you have a headache You take top Imagine just eating your ninth chick flay I don't like to put weird stuff in my body I mean they'll have a pill form

When I have a headache I hit a buffet They'll have a pill form That I would take I would take a pill form So it's the needle that's the problem Why don't you just get your girl To do it just jab it in your ass or something

And you don't even have to look She jabs it in my asses it is So what's one more thing It's full, Danny Too jabbed My ass is full I can't take it to her punishment Not to get too graphic

Your shits must be insane I actually brought one with me Dude But it's also When you get to a certain size Like having a shit It's kind of like You gotta like have technique

Like involved Like I sit down Really Well in the same way That we make sure That our underwear Is not around our ass So we don't shit on our underwear

That's what they have to do With their body and stuff They gotta put a leg here Take the jeans What did you say about shitting your underwear? Yeah, I don't get that. You got to take your pants off.

Obviously. Yeah, no. But in that... Yeah, he takes us off when he pees at the urinal. In the way that we do that, yeah. That's how fat people have to deal with their body. Like, that's one of our processes.

You pull your pants down, you have a shit. Yeah. Top people are you pull your pants down. That's like one-tenth of the thing. You got to get a good seat. You got to get your cheek spread a cheek on each side, really spread it. Because if your ass sits naturally, it's not going to get out. I don't know why everybody wouldn't do that, though.

Why wouldn't you, like, anchor your ass on the initial seat? Because when you're a normal size, you sit down, your ass is, like, already parted. Yeah. We don't have to, like, fucking harness it up on one side and strap it together. Yeah, hire a fucking... I think your ass is always parted, dude. Your ass is a departed. It's been true some things.

This is the guy who was telling me yesterday at our show. He says, after he shits, his assholes stays open. Sometimes. Like, for the rest of the day. No, no, do you never just have, like... In case he meets Tony. Do you ever shit where your body's done But your ass

It's still like the reflex By the way That sounds like a dream If I'm being honest No it's not You need your ass to Well because you know that just went straight out Like clean

It sounds like it's clean No because The worst thing you want Is it fucking closes a couple seconds early Yeah that's a bad I'd rather that Then the stays open Because it's just like

And Is there other men in the stall At that point Stayes open You never just have an ass Where it takes a while To get back to the way I think so.

It takes a while to, like, I think your sphinker has had too many uses or something. That's, yeah, that's what happens to gay porn stuff. Yeah, exactly. That's like some chickies. I must have a wink. Well, you say that when you're wiping, you get two fingers in.

I can get, I get this much of one finger in. I can't believe you get two. I'm saying if it's gaped. Yeah. But that's not often. You never have a shit that leaves you gaped? No.

No, dude. Well, then I got to check it out, I guess. I thought I saw it was having so much fun. didn't want the party to start. The ass is just like, we're at it. And then, but then you can't wipe, you can't wipe an ass that's gaped. You can't wipe a prolapse. Because, what, a prolapse?

Yeah. That's when the inside falls out. I think that's gonna be happening since you. It's just gape so far. It does sound like a problem. I might be on my way, yeah, it sounds like a horrible problem. It's not every time. Sometimes you have a shit and your, and your asses stays right now.

The ass closes. It's closed as hell today. How do you even know it's open is what I don't get it? Because you can feel the wind up inside your body. You hear the whistle. Do you know when you're having a big shit and like some of it breaks out and then you're like, then push out the rest of it? So imagine when that falls out and it sort of stays like that.

Mine immediately is contracting back. That's what a sifter works. It was exhausting. Mine's like an old period of fucking sweatpants or whatever. At 65 you're going to be in trouble, dude. Maybe. The elastic band is beat down. That's an old sock that stopped in a long time ago.

65 i got five years left i'm done for the coming the asshole doesn't like restore like a vagina restores restores yeah not after me they don't but after that's re-homed an assholes like once you blow it out it's blowing out i think it's a pretty good design though i don't think they're meant to get blown out from you shitting there should be some sort of a like a grip test yeah maybe you just have too wide of dumps and you've ruined your own asshole Irish dumps. Obviously, I didn't treat it like you guys.

You're a fucking classic car or something. When did this start? What? When did this start? For a while. Like, do you never just have a shit? Two fingers. Because you're getting around.

You're fucking getting around. I'm not like going down to the knuckle though, but it's like, I mean, maybe there'll be some people in the comments that agree with you, but this is definitely not something that I'm experiencing. Maybe you're just like explaining it wrong? Because I picture full two fingers. Like getting that much in my ass is crazy. No, obviously not going that much up.

No, it's like even that. Sure. But that's the whip that's going into your ass. Easy, yeah. Are you kidding me? That's a loose ass. Sorry. Sorry, I meant three fingers down, I guess.

Sorry, this is why you guys aren't dead. I said two, but I meant four. You're like, you're taking a dick in your ass every three times a day. You know, your body wants you to be gay. Maybe, yeah. I'm fucking too straight. I read David Goggins. I fucking.

Inside of there are two wolves. Yeah, I'm not being, I'm not being gay. Definitely too old. There's the gay one, and an Irish one. Yeah, the Irish wolf. Actually, okay, we're going to do a bit of my haters' ball list before we do another question. Number one, Mike Myers.

We hate him, we love him? Not impressed. This is what I'm talking about. I think he's great, just not for me. Yeah, for me, he's like top greatest of all time. I think he's great, not for me. Love Guru was the only one that wasn't that amazing. That sucked.

Just such a classic run. Wayne's World was so funny. Austin Powers. Austin Powers. I loved Awesome Bowers as a kid. I never saw a Wayne Whirls. I bet you did. Very aspirational. One character in particular.

We have to insult each other here. That's on call for. Yeah, Shrek. I never... Oh, Shrek, I don't give a shit about it. Shrek's great. That's the best one. But Mike Myers, that might be an age thing for you.

Yeah, yeah. Okay. Liam Neeson now. I think him cucking for Pamela Anderson is so fucking gay. She's like... The most ran through coups in all the fucking Hollywood. Coozee. Speaking of some cuisine.

Rang true. Like every person in the world is fucked at Liam Neeson is like Oh she's working with her Is the greatest privilege of my life Shut up you fucking old cop oh I didn't even see that So he's been doing interviews like

Just kind of cucking a little too hard Dude he's doing press where he's holding her like in the Titanic It's like it's like a guy's first hot chick It's like crazy And it's like his first hot chick is like She's like 70 now with no eyebrows And everyone has fucked her Dennis Rodman used to fucking slap her

With his dick after games Did Liam Neesam have like some old bag wife for a while And now he's this is his first his wife died So he was okay so he was he had like some nice pieces He had a wife who died 16 years ago And then he Was she taken? Yes

And then he just did every movie that was possibly For 16 years he just said I'm saying yes to anything Yeah And he hasn't had a girlfriend since now he has Pamela Anderson Like the two of them two old fox They fell in love I guess making naked gun And you think that he is too cool

and famous to be cocking that hard. The problem is they're doing, like, press tour now. Obviously, they're both... It's gross to watch. But, like, because their relationship now was like, oh, it's cute that these two old fucks have found someone

as part of the movie, blah, blah, blah, type of shit. You're not crazy to think that Pamela Anderson was, like, the chick, like, the way that you think, I don't even know, like, Sydney, or whatever, you're just like, she's just going to be some old bag one day,

and people are going to be like, that all, you know? But if you see it, people like, laugh are done to be going, uh, Pamela Anderson, Buh. Are you kidding me? She's 50.

In her prime. Oh, she was in same way. She fucked seven men. What the fuck? Lee Mason, you're 82. You should be... You shouldn't be dating some of your own age? I do agree with it.

He's like banging a 20-year-old. He does make bangers. Yeah, he don't think he can pull down. He's a nice guy. It's a great comment. I agree with you. I don't like to see this. I don't like to see Liam Nieson, bad boy of TV a little.

that going out there cucking around? I also don't, like, he's clearly dumb. Like, that thing he did about chasing black people around Ireland. Like, he's clearly dumb. And I think that's also what's sad is, like, simping that much for a dumb chick. There's no way that Pamela Anderson is, like, able to fucking hold a conversation.

You know what I mean? So, that is also, like, an element of it to me that's sad. It's like, yeah, I don't know. We did call there. Stern just got canceled. Yeah. Finally, his legendary run. It's canceled.

Did he cancel? Or did he just go? I don't want to do this anymore. No, Serious isn't giving him $100 million. I didn't even know it was possible

for him to get canceled. I thought he just owned his own. No, yeah, I mean, he gets these deals and they have,

they have an end date on the contracts. But he just probably makes, he was like, he was giving him a hundred million a year. Oh, I hope he starts podcasting

after all the shit he's talked. Oh, it'd be so great. Just fucking, because he went after Rogan, who would do that? And he went after fucking, like,

everybody for starting pods. That's a legend. Oh, isn't a great time? I love what he goes. You bet after Rogan? Could you imagine going on a podcast on bad-mouting Joe Rogan?

I mean, like, 10 minutes ago. You almost have to respect. I think that's the side that some people don't. Sorry, sorry. No, some people don't realize that about Lev is that he's on both sides of every issue.

That's how bad I am. Isn't it fun to have like a fucking retard around though? It's like, let me just be a retard. You don't come across. People that are very opinionated and very aggressive, such as yourself and then post about it on text, it doesn't capture

the fact that you will just as much argue the other thing the next day. Yeah, yeah. I'm a contrarian. But it does, yeah, I feel like, hell humpty dumpty. If somebody was shitting on Rogan to me, I'd be like, well, you're a fucking loser. Right. Which is why text doesn't capture you perfectly. Yes, yeah. Yeah, no camera

can either. But it's starting to catch on. I'm seeing who's liking this last spring. Oh, yeah? Like behind the scenes, liking the stories? Dude, it's got a while. Like, some industry people. Don't like the pizza suit guy? Big comics are all over this stuff. The only one who doesn't like me shitting on people to Shane, he's like, he's like, just

don't do that. Well, there is, this. Yeah. I mean, I don't like to shit on comics, period, especially publicly. Well, I'm not. Yeah. But there, but there is, there is like an element of, yeah, it's, I mean, it's, it depends on, like, where you're coming from.

If you're actually, like, angry, it never, it's never cool, you know? It's like the guy being like, why? she fucking him. Like, there's no way to be the guy that's like, oh, why would she be with that guy? Like, there's no way for that to be cool. That's a great example, yeah. And I have been that before, and that looks bad, and I delete that, and I'm like, this is too much.

Deleting it's funny. The internet's forever. We all text for you. I don't know that. So you think you're not that? You think you're not the guy going, why is everyone else getting shows and I'm not? No, I think. Everyone else is selling out shows, and I'm not on the road, because I'm not retarded. I think that's what I was doing. I think I think a little funnier about it now. I agree. Yeah, yeah. I

agree you was you go through the phases and you find your sweet spot. Yes. I think I'm in a sweet spot right now. And it's also really funny to go. It's a sweet spot. There's a donut place around the corner. I don't go there anymore. It's not coming across as much venom as much of choking around the way you was the buddy. Well, because I think

it's ultimately, it's just like, how well are you doing? And it's like, I feel okay right now. So now it's just more like, well, this stinks. I'm going to make fun of it. As opposed to what the fuck is going on? I mean, at least the Mitch Headberg guy, everybody hates. Yeah, you know what's sad? I went after him. Which is kind of funny that they're like

the pizza guy, people are like, this guy's good, and the dice guy, and then the Mitch Hedberg guy goes, everybody goes, that's too much. He viewed the story of me using him as a... But I didn't even really shit on him. I just, like, said it was insane to be covering another comedian. Yeah. But the other thing, too, is like, every single comic, like, I... For a decade, sounded too much

like, Louis. I'm like, try... You have to realize what you're doing too much of a, like, try to get away from it and run from it and change that and like try to be more yourself but now it's the exact opposite. Right. You know, so. Well, on the Howard Stern topic because it's one of those things where

a perfect example of a guy that wasn't that wasn't that good for eight years and I feel like people are it's funny to like shit on him but if you actually you have to respect someone's legendary run of like 20 years of being like the funniest guy in the world. You know what I mean? I'm a little less when someone was that great for so long I feel

like you can do a lot of harm before I'm like that guy sucked. The prank calls on at all. So funny. Oh, amazing. Oh, my God. Dude, like, Stern up until probably, like, I don't know, mid-2000s was like... To me, Stern is like... His genius is to some degree, like, creating the circumstances for the...

Which is hilarious, you know, but he's also funny himself. Like, he lets freaks be freaks, and he, like, creates that thing. Masterminds a scenario for humor who can thrive. Yes, but I don't know that I've ever heard Stern say something that made me laugh. Oh, yeah. Dude, starting in, like, the 90s was amazing. But Artie, I think it's hilarious on there.

Oh, he was so funny. But some of my favorite things were the prank calls. Like, uh... I don't know if I've heard this. Dude, Richard and Sal used to do these... You were your prank call guy? Yeah, I love a prank call. Dude, we used to do, like, fucking...

They think my food orders are prank calls. Okay. Yeah, right. A hundred pizzas. Yeah. That used to be a huge one back in the day, just calling restaurants and telling them we had a famous guy that was coming in and we needed them block off a section

and then telling them all these demands that he had. Oh, gray. But yeah, yeah, anyways, there was the one. Okay, next haters ball. But I do respect Stern. Like, like to see all that. I respect all that.

You have to. I also like... It's like judging Michael Jordan on baseball. Yeah. I also like, I kind of even defend that he has gotten so gay because I do think like... Classic 80-year-old Jewish guy move?

Yeah, it's just like he was the other thing for so long. And then at what point, Like, he's allowed to grow up. You know what I mean? He's a establishment Hollywood guy now. Yeah. He's like, he's a judge.

I won't defend that. I won't defend that. I felt like it was, uh, like a mix of different things, but it was just becoming like an old camaraderie guy. And I think it was having like a really small circle of people that you listen to. Yeah. Sort of thing. But fit bod, whether you're, yes, sir, whether you're hitting plateaus, whether your current

workout routines getting boring, whether you're just new to fitness and you don't know what to do, Fitbod sets you up with a custom workout. plan tailored to your fitness goals. You don't need a personal trainer when you got FitBod lets you get the summer body the workouts designed around your equipment, your goals, your experience. It keeps things interesting.

Oh, it's best part. Best part is it keeps it interesting. Best part for me is it keeps track of everything. I don't want to be the pen and paper guy. Yeah, I really like just exercise you never heard of. Exercise you never heard of. You know, target a different part. You know, target a different part of your bicep.

I didn't even know that existed. You know what it is? Once you've been working out for a long time, you never have those days where you wake up feeling like a little extra sore that day. Yeah, because you've been doing the same thing, getting in the groove where FitBod spices it up. FitBod creates personalized workouts based on your goals, fitness levels, and available equipment. The workouts that adapt as you grow, so each workout is challenging you to push and make progress so you don't get in those ruts, tracks your muscle recovery so you can avoid burnout, keep your momentum, know what muscles you've done and how long you've waited,

and if that's the right time, so you're not just winging it out here like some people doing the same muscles, back to back, you just start to, you know, kind of waste time and spin cylinders. Level up your workouts with customized fitness plans that work for you with over a thousand demonstration videos. Get in shape this summer with FitBod. Join FitBod today. Get your personalized workout plan, 25% off your subscription, and you can try the app for free for seven days at FitBod.m.m. slash Boyscast. If you don't want to try it for free for seven days, you can get 25% off when you go to FitBod.m.m. slash Boyscast. boys do not forget to buy tickets to my tour right now we're adding tons of dates so keep checking

but we got appleton on the books milwaukee columbus and milwaukee i should say we just added because we were going to appleton so that's a new one yes cincinnati cleveland baltimore eugene new york city with lots of special guests fort worth dallas ryanlong comedy dot com get those tickets and you catch me next weekend in saratoga springs august 22nd 23rd at the comedy works and dallas october 24th, 25th tickets at Dannycommodo.com. As far as late night, who are the best ones?

Conan, Craig Ferguson, who's Seth Myers? You a Myers guy? Conan was my guy. Conan was the man. I liked Conan. So no hate on any of those ones? Yeah, I mean...

Chelsea Handler, you said you loved. Doesn't she have a bunch of news? I think I've seen her tits a bunch of times. Yeah, I think she posts them. Yeah. It was sort of the late night is sort of the last bastion. That's not... No, they have to be revenge,

I hate that. I hate when they go, hey, I'm just trying to do this to get ahead of the guy blackmailing me. No, no, no, no, no. No, you dirty old bag.

We'll do this behind your back and you will not allow it. I don't want to see you naked, you idiot. It's supposed to be like it's, it's a moral for me. It's like the fapening. Yeah, I get off

in the fact that this is a barreness. Yeah, you're ruining it. There was a comic that raised money. She showed her tits to raise money for cancer. You've never seen money. my group chat raise money quicker

wasn't it for Black Lives Matter I can't remember what it was for racial injustice it was like a Black Lives Matter and then she chopped her tits off Tiddies for Oh did she? Collin had a pretty amazing

business idea Do you want to say it on here? Maybe because we'll never make it Well it was just a riff But it turned it to We want to start a website called Tit Starter It's like Kickstarter

For how much money For implants? You show the girls standing there The girls raise money By simps That's like really good idea for her to get her we're talking like literally it's only fans but there's like

can I buy in? Yes we that's literally what we need can you just take it off our hands and give you do you want to just buy we're way too stupid to get this going I had for sure I was like I know a guy who could AI make all this and then I just hit him up and he goes I'm not going to do it for less like a huge chunk and I was like

all right fuck off it's good but like this is a website that you go on and then you look at all the girls who are like hey please raise money for me to get new tits and then you go I like this girl and then you buy her breast Well, you give her $10. But you get to see them after. When they're finished, you get...

What happens if they take the money and then don't show them? I think that would be hard to go to court and be like, we are owed their viewing. Colum's the surgeon. We own the surgery place also. So the surgery place you own and the photo is done with consent during at that point in time. You could actually obligate it to do all this stuff or you owe us fucking 10 grand. You know what?

Maybe they don't post a photo of the tits, but they do have to use our surgeon. That is... Yeah. We're not giving you the money. we give him the money. But I don't think people are going to spend the money on the tit enlargement

unless they get to see them. That's how you... I think the way it works is like this website I would spend all day on this if it's a 20 year old college student who wants tits and it's the...

The problem is you got to look at so many bad tits. No, but you see her face and then the rest of her body is blurred to you donate 10 bucks and now the rest of the photo a little blurs of it

so now you're getting an unblurred bad rack I think there's enough guys why are they bad necessarily it might just be a flatter chest, a smaller size she wants to go up beside her two. Think of it more like

you're not, you're, it's a recipe, right? And you're just looking at the ingredients and the ingredients is some flat chest and bitch. Now you're talking to life. You know what I mean? It's a recipe. And right now you're just looking at the uncooked product. And later on. Nothing wrong with the uncooked product a lot of time. I'm not going to fuck the uncooked product in the ass. I don't need tits.

Yeah, I'm pretty sure you can just go on a plastic surgeon's website and they just show photos of this stuff. No, especially if you're cruising like just a normal chick where you're like, something's very clinical about that. Wacking off to it before and after a The job is like real low. It's like murder or shit, dude. Like when it's like a medical.

Or it's an untapped market. No, it gets too medical for me. It's something you know you needed. Isn't this like legitimately a fucking great idea? Shit starter could work. But I don't think you didn't necessarily need the, you don't, I guess that's what it's where they go up. If I get enough subscribers, they'll do this and this and this.

And you give the first fucking first people that sign up, you give them like. Let's not give every fucking Tom Dick and Harry our day. This time next week there'll be 28 millionaires and we're sitting around doing nothing. You had a great idea and we're too stupid to like apply it anyway.

No, I don't think it's a good idea. I think it's content now. Yeah, it's much better to do this on a podcast. It's much better to have your million dollar idea stolen on a podcast. Okay, well you know, we'll move on from my haters ball segment. I'll tell you what, I'm going to list off the five people.

You pick one if you have anything to say. Jim Carrey, Dave Ramsey, Russell, Brown, Bill Mark. I have something on all of you After I... Well, you pick two after I finish the list. Who are they?

Okay. Jim Carrey, Machine Gun Kelly, M&M, Russell Brand, Bill Marr, Pierce Morgan, Kanye West,

Post Malone, Jimmy Kimmel, Elon, Elon Musk. Dude. And you can pick to her... You can pick as many as you want

for the haters ball. Is this segment just created for Laugh? Yeah. It's like Levs coming in. Everyone knows Lev Furs the biggest hater in the industry.

That's what he did. Like, this is popular. But no one knows who love it. I mean it took me nine minutes but you might be like let's be like my favorite luncher. He's a fat hater. But it's

actually smart. It's smart what he's doing. I don't call him hate some people do fucking prep for a podcast. It just doesn't make any sense. You're not interviewing like fucking It does make sense. He's going, he's a comedian. But he's a comedian is more like this is a guy that's funny doing this thing. Yeah, but he's not known as a hater. He's not known as anything.

I feel like that's a difference with comedians. You come on and show the thing that they're funny at. They don't have to be like, I've never seen this guy hate before. I only like to see known haters. I don't know. I feel like it seems like this. By the way, I got bad news about this TITS starter thing. You just started it? No. I went to go see if the domain was available.

It's not. Tittstarter.com. I asked you that live on the pod and you said it was available. And there is, so someone came out with something 12 years ago that community people sharing it was on Reddit, but then there is a thing called MyFreeimplants.com. Pay for my implants.com. Yeah, which is, I believe.

similar to your ideas. What if we just go titstarter. Titsstarter.com's not available. But it's a dot com. But tit starter doesn't go to anything. Yeah, you can get tit starter. dot actor. How would you want that?

I wasn't even aware that that was a thing. I wasn't. Titster. That's what you want. Yeah. I don't think dot tits. Or you want. Tits starter.

Fit? No. Tickstarter. dot I.O. That's like a tech thing. I.O. Yeah. High class.

Tits. I go, way. Yeah. But anyways. my free implants.com We got a jingle See these tits They make me go

Hio They make me go high By the way They literally My free implants It looks like Kicks Like GoFund me basically

Their website It should be green Like light green And you scroll through And you just see like Hot girls Yeah And you just click in

What's her story Why does she want tits? That's just so funny In fact guy being like Does she deserve it though? Let me hear our sub story Like when you're watching X Factor or whatever the fuck Stay flat bitch

Titter for me Yeah This is the website No fucking way That stinks dude That looks like The difference is We're gonna like advertise ours on podcasts

Oh okay So who's these these guys have never been on Yeah but the theme is like These chicks have fake tits already it wants me to make an account I'm not doing that yeah okay it would be a very

no it said you want to sign back in is what it said yeah you guys I got to remember my password I have to reset the password the whole thing do you want to use your remembered blogging if you do muckbangs you can get people to pay for your food

did you know that you just have to stream it on text I'm not doing muck bags why not I'm not doing it I'm gonna just try to be funny literally there's like a fucking gold line in front just one or two

you can be funny on that's the thing that's probably that doesn't exist is a funny muckbanger they're all crying. That's your niche. You're the funny muckbush. What happened with the big fat guy?

He's now skinny. He didn't record like two years of muckbang? Oh, yeah. Nicado avocado. Is he still skinny? I don't know because he was like he was posting stuff and he's like I'm skinny again and the people like these videos are this is old and he's actually still fat. I don't know.

I don't follow that. I've seen clips of a couple that does them and they're like these two both in-celly like nerdy fucking people like autistic people and with somebody the chick is like really possessive of her food. So he's like, honey, is it okay if I grab a bite of your sprigold?

She's like, she's like spazz out of dude. She's like such a cuck-danger. She's such like a cucket about it. You're like, you're going to have as much of mine as you want. Say, if I wanted that, I'd have it. Yeah, fat people fighting over food

would be a good live stream. Like just two fat fucks and then they roll like a fucking ham. Cake or, yeah, ham or yeah. You ever see? Avery or sweet. Pick your weapon.

I had to do him fight to the death over I spent the whole season trying to choose You ever see that video where a guy It's like farmer and he has like a cow And then the cow's like in his kitchen And he's trying to like make food While the cow eats it

You could do something like that with your girl There you go A new idea She's cooking and you're just eating all the ingredients You're fat as fuck You're so fat Honestly Are you kidding me

Not much difference between us You're over a hundred pounds You're a hundred pounds heavier than me We could start at the penis. Lab, if you walked in looking like that, we'd be like, what is your secret? What is going on? If I look like that, my secret would be, I'm gay. I'll tell you what, if Danny looked like that, he would be muck-banging.

Oh, I would be... You know what I mean? He definitely would be monetarily exploiting this. Yeah, because he's a clever Judin. Udun? At North of 250, you're fucked. You ate the juie-ness out of you. Yeah.

That's out. Yeah, that's a lot of... Okay, so... I'm making up for the holocaub. Get your two people for the haters' balls, so we move on to our next segment. What are they again? Dave Ramsey, Jim Carrey, Machine Gun Kelly, Who's Dave Ramsey?

Well, if that's not going to be on the haters ball, then is it? Russell Brand and Bill Maher. He's the finance, he's the finance advice guy. Gordon Ramsey's right. Christian finance advice guy. He's actually pretty sick. People call in and he just tells him their finances a mess. You should actually call in there to give you advice.

I thought that maybe you would tell you to do muckbags, is what he tells you to do. I thought he'd be funny because... I just want to sound of my voice. Well, you'd call him and tell him your finance situation and he'd be like, this is a fucking mess. Oh, I like that guy. He rules, actually. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

And he's like, what do you mean you want to buy a house? It's like, you're in debt. I'm not money. They're like, what? Like, they can't even comprehend. It's so funny there to watch that, to feel good about yourself while you live with your parents? I know. You're like, what a loser.

Well, I guess like, yeah, I want to buy a car on car payments. He was like, you don't have any money. This is the dumbest thing you've ever done, you know? Well, I did buy a Harley that got repossessed. That was pretty fucking retarded. Oh, yeah. Oh, the Harley's gone? Yeah, Harley's gone.

Can you believe if you don't pay that for a year, they fucking take it? They come and take it back? They want your bike back? This is the thing, also, that trip me up. Best thing that ever happened to you is getting rid of that thing. I love that bike somewhere. I miss it, man. You'll get one someday. I'll get one someday, but I had it in a garage, right? And they found it?

Yeah, had it tucked away in the garage, but I owed the garage money. Oh, that's... So my thinking was like, they can't... They'll never give up this bike because that's their leverage. So they have to keep this bike because they go, we can't give you money or the bike. We owes this money. Yeah, but they don't have a legal claim to it, whereas the finest. What I didn't know is my enemies would come together to compromise against me.

Now, they worked it out. They sold the bike behind my back and paid off the garage with that, with a kind of. And the other thing, they sent me a letter. They still won. Yeah, you probably still owe a bunch of money. Yeah, oh, yeah. That's crazy. How much do you owe?

I was learning how bikes appreciate. That's just salt in the wound. Yeah, this motorcycle wasn't a good investment. You already won. They're rubbing it in. Like, you got me to sign. off at a 25% interest rate you got the bike back. I paid

you $800. Yeah. Ever? Yeah. Fuck off. See, Dave Ramsey would have having a field day with this whole thing right now. Yeah, he's fucking, you got a vein throbbing in his forehead trying to figure out. No, that guy rules, actually. I like that guy. But I've learned. Those guys are hilarious. That guy rules. It's fun content

to watch. It's always just some moron, too. If you're scrolling, that's way better. Yeah, it's like I spent $200,000. I like this. I like this. So you're, you earn $28 a year. yeah and you're and you're leasing a Ferrari and your plan is the

and then they explain to them they go you're spending more than you earn and they're like what yeah they literally go what do you mean this is what you earn

this is what you're spending I just don't know I have a bunch of credit cards I don't know yeah but I started a new credit card what did they go they reset

and they go yeah what they're like what's that even mean they go that's like a percentage thing that's the interest rate if I'm so broke

why do people keep offering me more credit And then the last are Post Malone, Jimmy Kimmel, Elon Musk. Or we can move on to the next question. I like Kimmel. Post is all right with me. Jim Carrey, I'm not a fan. Never been a, never been into the carry.

Carrie slaps. I think that's also an age thing. I fucking hate that over-the-top face bullshit. But it's awesome when you're nine. When you're nine years old. I went on 35, too. No, but at the time. You're just getting a good dude.

I still watch The Grinch and go, damn, that's a good performance. Carey does. Grinch is like the all-time comic performance, I think. Like, just few. For sure. Genuinely, I think just few comedy. No one can do what he does like that. If you watch the Comedy Seller documentary, or the Comedy Star documentary, they do have wacky things where they're like, he would go and sit in the piano.

He would sit in the piano all night and wait for his set so he could come out of the piano and they're like, that's how whack. And you're watching and be like, can you imagine how annoying that would be? If you're at like a comedy club and you're like, if you were like, hey, I'm going to go sit in the piano. And they'd be like, we didn't get a bigger piano. You could sit in the box. That was fun That used to be fun in 1981

You're just like every night Bad news It's coming back Yeah there's definitely gonna be a guy in the piano suit It's gonna be a guy In the fucking kill Tony kick drum That's a fucking autobiography

The guy You got Danny on the haters ball now Spread This is a question From the question segment They said Are you guys I kind of didn't get it

But you'll get the idea It said Are you guys like all the other guys Who pretend not to be interested In going to interview Bonnie Blue And then take the piss out of her instead of actually asking

philosophical questions. I think this was written weird, but I think the idea was like, are you one of those people who pretends you don't want to interview Bonnie Blue, but you actually would want to interview? Because I feel like there is a point where every podcast starts interviewing Porn Star. Sure. We've discussed it, right? We have, specifically Bonnie Blue

or just PornStra? We had the idea of like finding a stripper and paying her like just a rate to just sit on the couch and we never address. Never talked very much? No, but we make it the only serious part we've ever had. We really talk about, like, the military, industrial complex and shit. And she's like,

he's wearing like a shit tattoo. Just go get like some fucking crazy person off the street and do that. It would be way cheaper. But then you don't get the funniest of you order a stripper. She walks in and you're like, oh, there's your mic. You go, huh? You've had that bunny on, have you? Have you? Have you had any? No, we don't have porn stars on.

No. We don't have girls on, it's for starters. I'm not saying we would never. We talked about having Roseanne. Like, there's a couple people we thought about breaking the rule for. But though, shit is that that's fucking guys only. But that's just because you believe after a certain way to girl's a guy but yeah the gimmick

like whatever the deal of the podcast was it was like it's a guy's hanging out right but sure but I've always felt like it does feel like a

sim move to me sometimes at least some people do it cool but like I feel like you know you come bring a porn star and you're like what's it like to fuck all those men

like I don't know yeah every question and then you kind of like big them up it's like you actually had to talk to them like a fan oh that scene

can I just say that scene you got came on was like Or you're being rude to them, right? Or you do the other way where you're kind of like, you know, shitting on them and you're like, neither of them seems to, like, fit how I'd like to handle. You can't invite someone on your podcast.

And how they even bring in that many views? Are they really? I think they sometimes bring in views, but those views do not come back, my friend. That is a one-time pop once that nut is gone unsubscribe again. Yes, that is a 12-second view. Years ago, I had a stripper on, and it was me and my buddy, and she was just telling us her story while me and him made jokes that she didn't get at all. and we had the time of our life

like it was so goddamn fun but you were kind of messing with her a little bit which to me feels like kind of almost rude I don't think she loved it oh you paid her? No she came on to promote her book to the 500 viewers we had at the time her book

it's pretty damn funny in me there's her coloring book that she's pushing another time on an old podcast had I had a trans porn star come on and she came on with a comic who was like I got to

like I'm a big fan of her the transport star was like down to clown and I was like wasn't a fed wasn't offended anything I was like we can all right cool we'll like yeah we'll fuck around I'll say some wild shit the comic was like not down girl comic or guy comic girl comic and she

was kind of like yo this is not okay where you're doing I'd make a joke and she'd like eye roll or be like no it just like we're here to uplift the transplants yeah anytime I threw the ball into the air to play it was like spiked it no Absolutely not. I was like, all right.

But the point, and meanwhile, the porn service is just like, fun. Yeah, you know why? Because that's a dude. It seems like that.

A couple guys like us knocking her hogs. Like, please stop. Very, very telling that the biological woman was a real wet blanket. You can't,

you can't deny how the trans women, like men who are now women, they just dominate so easily, you know, constantly. They just constantly. Conversation and swimming. It's so easy

Just to be playing a game on easy You know Whatever the category is You switch over to being a woman You are up there Funniest in the room Foniest in the room of biological women Yes

I accidentally hooked up with a trans trick One time I remember they had big accident I believe we were the ones Who broke it to you know That was wild First time was on purpose Second time was an accident

Second time was on purpose Third time I paid for Yeah Fourth time she stopped calling you back I had this I had this conversation With a bunch of bro comics

And they were like Dude no I was like She was very hot I promised They were like no way I showed the photos Yeah

She was very hard I could have got got I had no idea But I literally said to her At one point I was like I don't know Like talking to you

It's like I'm talking to a bro And I was like The fact that she didn't tell me Then is like crazy And my buddy Like saw this happening He's like friends with her He did not tell me

I know the body was We know where the buddy was because he's the one who told us the one that we told you. The buddy did you dirty a little. He really fucked me. Not like explosive, explosive, not for the average, Joseph. Kind of crazy what he pulled. It was nuts.

He like wouldn't tell me because he goes, hey man, don't take her home. Don't do it. And I'm like, why is this guy trying to pussy block me? She's like a model. That's a crazy way to warn a buddy. Hey man, I don't know if that's a good idea. If you can read between the lines of this text message That should be a face-to-face

Wrestle me to the ground You should be grabbing me Definitely Austin Powers me She's a man, baby Yeah, yeah, yeah Isn't that fucking crazy Not to warn him, brother? The most convoluted way going

Hey buddy, you may regret that Yeah, why No explanation, nothing. I told you not need that sound Yeah, she was poison. I was like 23 and drunk, no fucking warning whatsoever. I'm just like, what's this little jealous bitch doing, huh? Yes. The funniest thing that I was texting the boys.

I was like, bringing a fucking model. I remember that. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Dude, we had a, that group chat was like 10 of us. And then we had another group chat of nine of us. Did we? I think so.

And we were all just like, live, that was a dude. Oh, my God. Dude, that is so funny. that you bragged about it beforehand. In the group chat, too, the garage was playing around with a model last night. It fucked my head up so bad.

Really? Yeah, like, really because you liked it. No, it's a you immediately good. So you didn't like it. I would not do it again. I mean, I didn't do much in the first place. But it messed you up.

Yeah, and also, I didn't even know the next day, I had no idea. So you woke up like, who am I? What am I? No, I woke up thinking that chick was awesome. Yeah. Like it, because there was never...

Like, he liked it. He liked it. Not even in the morning. No. What? Yeah, it was like the next day or even tweeted. I still don't know what the deal is. Okay. I don't know.

A friend of mine had to break it to me the next thing. So I was like, dude, that chick was sick. I was like, we should fucking... I was like, I might see her again. And he goes, I got to tell you now. Yeah, we already have a Jim Norton, okay? Yeah. So, and I was like, oh, geez, they fucking dude.

It put me in a tail spin, bro. I didn't realize. I thought it was funny. No. It was like, legitimately. I like panicked for me. I wrote like a fucking short film about it. It was like pure panic.

Was it a musical? It was fucking crazy. Interesting. I guess you have a little bit of the emo side. It comes out. Yeah, yeah, 100%. There's an article. Okay.

Shoplifting just to feel something. Epidemic of women that have been shoplifting as adults. And I've always said there's every girl I've ever dated has been addicted to shoplifting. Oh yeah. High school girl, man. That's a fucking... Women be shopping. That's why they do be shoplifting as well now.

That's why they have everything in glass at CVS is for those. It's like Hank's wife and a breaking bad. This is taking off, is it? Buddy, this is coming back where it's like girls that were writing, you know, blogs before. Now they're writing blogs like a shoplifting right and left. Me as a person, when I was 16, I was big on fucking changing the tags on the place. Sure. I still do.

A hundred dollar jersey tag it down to a pair of socks. Self-checking, come on. I still do. I'll fucking. It's a thrill. To return it? I'm Lucy Goosey at the self-chie. Check it. I'm Lucy Goosey.

I'm forgetting a lot of stuff on that bottom shelf. Sometimes they forget it. I'm going, hey, the tag fella, I'm putting in a skateboard as bananas. Whatever the fuck it is. I'm taking liberty, yeah. It used to be more of a thrill, though, because it was like you could get busted. Home Depot is getting fucking fleeced on you. Make no mistake about it, I've fucking damaged Home Depot at this point.

I've damaged their stock value. I go into Home Depot. I walk out with a receipt for a nail and fucking five big fucking, fucking, and I go what? And I just walk out. Fuck them. Airport, I'm not paying for anything in the airport. He's talking about security. He's like, I think there was three Mexican guys outside.

I saw a black guy near a hammer. What? Run, run! Quick! Airport, if they're not there for more than two seconds. Airport's free to me. Airport is free. That's the rule.

The rule is, once you've gone past TSA, everything in there is like a buffet to you. Yeah. That's my rule. And I don't give a fuck. It's a lounge. They're not stopping you, by the way. They work at the airport.

They cannot have level. energy. Norman got in trouble. Fuck, Mark. He got in trouble? Fuck him. Got caught. Hey. He got... He's like a multi-millionaire. Yeah, the buzz is the buzz, though. That's what I'm saying. The girls are on to something. There's out of spite, you know.

But women... $7 for a fucking pack of M&Ms or something. I'm not. I'm stealing it. And I'm taking a fucking neck pillow and I'm fucking trolling the trash. I pay for it like a sucker. I'm scared. No, neck pillow's stolen. To me, like, stealing M&Ms is like worse than rape.

I feel like I like to think of it as their fault Like if I go and I wait in line And the person's not there I go that's on you Yeah I'm not I'm not willy nilly these days Which one are we talking about? I respect you

I envy you've like a courage For life No it's like it's like a spiteful I have them It's just like fuck you You know the upcharge and the fucking take it And you're just constantly getting Fucking fucked in the ass by everybody

Yeah They got you because they started putting No, the locks on everything. Fuck, yeah. Some people took advantage of it too much, and it ruined it for the casuals. Yeah, yeah. People are like, headphones?

The casual Steelers come rooting for the casual Steelers. I walk in, and I go, oh, where's your iPhone headphones? I go, okay, which ones is it? Then I hit him with a hammer. And I take out a gun, and I empty the fucking till.

My flights at five minutes. The morning, my zone. In the airport. The most IDed. place in the world. You got a gun through? I tried to stick up. You stick about some news.

I got a bomb. Give me these headphones. I do steal headphones. Electronics airport. That's it. I would love to. You got them so often, but I don't have the guts for that. That's above my pay green.

Now the trick is you kind of scope it out. What are we doing? Grab it over here. Well, what's this over here? Maybe I'm just on a moonwalk. I'm out. I'm out. Yeah, but one day you're going to be at the Chili's drunk waiting for your flight.

Then the cop comes up to you. I got him too drunk to remember. Yeah, that's... Not as a citizen either still, right? No, I'm not. I'm a permanent residence. That's what I'm saying. Does it matter?

That's even sketchier. Nah, I'm all right. I've never heard of any. I've never heard of a white guy. I have not heard of one immigrant being sent home. Give me an example of one person ever being sent out of this country. That actually was one of the questions. One of the questions was,

When are you leaving? Excited for alligator alcatraz? I'm there because I stole some M&Ms. airport me and 70 million Mexicans and it's just me you're the El Salvadorian prison I'm the one tall white guy in a sea of little Mexicans yeah oh look at your Alcatraz I just took my mask at the airport I left a neck pillow I left my neck pillow home you tattoo a prison dad a neck pillow I'm part of the Latin kings now because I fucking took some air plugs yeah Alcatrault but it said uh uh uh

There was kind of the three questions that I put together. The first one was asking me and Danny, but also applies to call them if you are doing your U.S. citizenship. And then also said thoughts on the U.K., Australia, and Ireland, like, touring and country-wise. So that's why it's sort of related. But I'm doing my citizenship this summer. I just haven't fucking got around to it.

I've been saying that for five somewhere. That's kind of where I'm made. Apparently, they're making the test way harder, too. Stop that. Because Trump, Trump's like the test. When? No, I think it started now. I promise you.

I promise you. I promise you the test. it's probably still the easiest thing you ever. Like driving over here is the dumbest thing. You show up there, driving exam in America. They're just like, are you okay?

Yeah, yeah. Yeah, hard for people that don't speak English, but... Yeah, it's basically just to weed out the people who are like, don't know English.

What is it? Like, what's the fucking capital? No, it's just like... One of the three branches of government. I should learn that. Yeah. Stuff like... It's stuff like that.

They should do this for the people who are born here, too. This is fucking... Well, they do. Well, it's called school. Civics class. I've met Americans today. They don't know any of them.

That is true, but, dude, do you see these, like, TikTok videos that they're, like, ask people the most basic questions on the street? Do you ever get them wrong? Do you ever watch those things where it's obviously, yeah, yeah, yeah. It's, like, on Fox News,

and they're interviewing the dumb youth of today in Miami, and then they're like, so what year was America found it? And I'm like, I don't know, yeah. I understand that the... Yeah, but you're not American. I understand that the joke here is that this guy's an idiot,

but every third question, I go, I don't... Yeah, I had the phone offender on that one. Yeah, I think it used to be like, you have to get, 8 out of 12 or something and now it's like 24 questions You'll nail it it'll take you two days

Dude it's the easiest shit in the world It's really like how many states are there You can memorize the questions Because it's not like questions like questions It's like these are the actual questions In Australia is like harder They have like an English exam Like you have to do an essay

And you get to prove that you're like competent With your language Yeah, they should definitely do that here We're trying to keep out of the essays You know what I'm saying But it's funny A lot of Irish are actually They go to Australia

they work for a couple of years, then they get granted like a visa and you've got to get your citizenship doing the English exam and the Irish are so dumb a lot of them fail the English exam. It's designed to keep out Indians and Chinese and shit.

And like the Irish who speak English because they're all carpenters and shit they're going, what the fuck they don't know how to spell, they can't read, that's why they're... This is why I'm a carpenter in Australia.

They're like cheating off the Asian guy and shit. But they get sent home there happens to loads of Irish people you'd meet and they go out and they go failed the English exam sent home for family. Yeah, like they take tutors. That's the most Irish shit ever is.

Dude, my brother did the exam and failed, but because he's dyslexic in Ireland. Probably dyslexic everywhere. No, but in Ireland, when you're dyslexic, they give you like bonus points or whatever. And like, he was in Australia, he failed the exam, and he goes, listen, I'm dyslexic.

Do you guys do bonus points? And they're like, yeah, but then you've got to do dyslexia course. You got to do the dyslexia test and he went and did that, which is just like, failed that. Failed it. And I swear they got the dislexia.

For the first time of my life, the words really came together. You can read everything clear as day. As soon as I got out of there, I was fuck. It was like a text to you, what happened. And they, they fucking, they brought them in. They'd go, have you ever got an exam like this in Ireland? He goes, yeah. And they're like, what are the results?

He's like, I'm dyslexic. And the girl was like, you're far. He goes, am I retarded? We don't use the word retarded anymore. Yeah, he was retarded. So they just gave him, like, a retard visa or something. I don't know. Like, they gave him a retard.

I swear they gave him a retard reason. Don't worry about it. But he was, like, 28. Found out he was, like, fucking, like, special needs. That's super funny. I swear to God, he was, like, 28 years old doing an exam. They're like, dude, you're all fucked up. You were, like, a learning disability.

He's like, what? There's a couple dudes that were, like, kind of gangster guys. They were probably, like, 60 IQ, like, something wrong with them. And then, but they were, like, around. And I remember, but, like, because it was, like, if you see, like, a big black guy dressed in, you know, Pretty like, you know, like basketball jersey and shit like that. Yeah, you get horridating.

But he's kind of like, you're like, it kind of looks like it could be a guy like trying to seem dumb because he's a rapper, you know what I'm in? And then girls would go home with him and then realize he was like retarded. They thought he was being cool. Like, you thought he was being cool. Yeah, like, what do you think of that?

I don't know. No, he's dumb. Yes, yes, yes, yes. He's so mysterious and cool. That's exactly what it was. And they'd be like, you know, what's your doing? He'd be like, you don't even know what I'm saying? This is what it is, yo.

It's a good way to disguise being a retardant. Yeah, he's like, he keeps, like, playing with his chain because it's shiny. That is the best. That is the best way to hide being retarded. Be a gay, yeah, go gangster. The chance to be a black guy. That is a good way to come right now. Yeah, your brother, they're like, your special needs.

He's like, I'm not black. White people can get that? You know, you have to go like hard, like hood drill rapper You're just like too cool to even show any fucking, you know, it is weird. And then they would go on to fuck him and he'd be going, boom, boom. He's in the car going, you go real hard R.

It's probably the best fuck you'll ever have, though. He actually might lay it down. Retarded guys must like, oh, he's crushing you. He actually probably did damage, yeah. That's why I'm a bad fuck. I'm so smart. Too smart.

Sure. fucking's a little bit of a dumb guy's game 100% 100% Especially with the same girl If you're putting in the same If you're like actually You've had sex with the girl more than 10 times

And you're not like super drunk And you're showing up for like I'm in a pleasure of this girl to the maximum amount It's like Even just wanting to fuck your wife Like when a guy's like Like Danny he's like Yeah I still have regular sex with my wife

I'm like you're dumb Like that's being a dumb That's what pussy is to you It's like why don't you spend that time Being ashamed of yourself instead. You're like, oh, I'm going to put my dick in a hole. That's fucking crazy. Different holes. Same one. I like the comfort.

It's a disgusting, intimate, shameful thing, and you just are happy with it. Anyways, this is this my seventh chick flat off? Lots gross. Turn that camera off. Yeah. So it's nuts. Well, there is, obviously, I mean, I'm sure that a million people have made some similar point, but you're just like,

it does take a little bit of dumbness to really just like clock in. It's all, yeah, it is dumb guys. Right. Would you fuck my wife? Yeah. Take my wife. As much as you fuck your wife?

No, did, no, dude. No, less. You'd fuck her a little less. Yeah, I can't do that to my life. What's the, what's the, what's the, what's the algorithm of the formula to come up with these exact? The current wife would be upset if you fuck the other wife too much. Who would you be more excited to fuck, like, today? Would it be my wife or your wife?

Honestly, I just want to be left alone. that's a political answer ladies and gentlemen why you fuck her so she leaves you alone it's a political answer no I'm not fucking your girl dude they've done the study

so many times where it's the you know someone can only bust this many nuts and they can't get the amount of nuts up and then they add a new like it's like a monkey or whatever they add like a new monkey and it all of a sudden has like 10 times more nuts

they did that they did that with the quantity I mean I go to bed later yeah the quantity the quantity of like I don't know what how much does you come like a leader or two

Let's say the average person comes a leader Every time they come They fuck a girl twice then it's like half a liter But then you're bringing a new girl They just back Your body has some In the back Dude your body's like I noticed some at the back

Your body's like no Dude your body rallies Yeah your body finds it As if you're like I'm too hungover And you're like yo everyone's there And you're like okay You hear that someone that you haven't seen in a while Showing up to the party

You're like I can do a couple shots Yeah your buddy shows up with some coke That's what I don't know that's what that's what a new girl is for your dick your buddy with coke for sure

that is impressive though that your dicks is like no we're tapped we're tapped new girl he's like fucker all right

guys sorry we're working out I got a second wind we got a big order just came in I'm sorry I know it's Christmas Eve

and this is the last thing was because it kind of ties into a lot of stuff but the article the headline is man proposed to his AI chatbot girlfriend.

Then he cried his eyes at when she said yes. And the reason I'm bringing in this up is this has happened nonstop right now. The dudes are actually getting in relationships with their chatbots. Yeah. I can see it. Yeah. It's the only woman that's been nice to him ever. It makes a lot of sense.

That's where the world's at right now, though. You're going to have, dude, I've read another stat where it was like one third of guys under 30 haven't had sex in a year. Not interesting? So you, but like you're innocent. What did I date in my wife? Dead bedrooms This is single bros Yeah they're single guys

Dude that's the future Dead bedrooms don't go a year Oh I wish Oh what peace Oh you must be so clear You must just You don't like to have to clock in Where you're sort of like

Okay I guess I have to put him Every now and then Or it's gonna get cranky around the house Yeah I fuck because I feel like There's like a social pressure to keep it going But I can go for weeks went out of it easy peasy. And there is a social pressure. It does fall apart

a little bit if you let it go, oh, completely too much. I have a whole psychological thing with fucking, I'm like, I don't know what sort of sick shit I have. I think, I honestly but I think my brother, I'm having an older brother who exposes you into porn young creates like this weird bad, it's like when like, you know,

Trannies get molested and that's why they're all weird later on. Like, I don't have that, but I did watch a lot of like, uh, beastiality porn when I was like 10. Because my brother was like, yo, I got I got a beastiality So call them lore Yeah

So I had to sit down and watch Beastiality porn With my brother When I was like dad Taped open We're like what the fuck I'm never even seen regular porn I'm watching a woman

Got a broken open by a horse You wanted to show you How your parents met So you're saying the missionary This is how you were born This is how you were pregnant I don't say Yeah but like so

I don't know The idea of like Yeah I saw porn at six Yeah I think it fucks you up Yeah I think I have weird But only now do I have like weird shames about sex. I didn't have that when I was like...

What are the shames? Like, I'm like, you know, behind the horse mask, I'm usually pretty upset. Single tear under the horse mask. I have my scream mask on generally. No, I don't know what it is. Like, now, I think it's because I've been in like a real relationship for a while now. It's like, and I'm not just a young, super young guy anymore. It's like, now sex is like a thing.

It's like, this is like an intimate, like we need to do this to connect. it's like there's like pressure and stakes there I've never connected with one person not even close dude not even close to being I don't make eye contact I'll pretend I'll pretend they look in the eyes

yeah right head over the shoulder love head over the shoulder I'll let you know when I'm done I'll tap you on the back when I'm finished head over the shoulder love head over the shoulder that's the trick

that's how you fuck head over the shoulder shut up Clap, clap, clap. Shut up. Shut up. What is she saying? Why?

What is she saying? She makes that contact column says, going to help you? I go, whoa. Do we have to go through the rules again? I love you. She goes, I love you. Yeah.

Sure. Like, women are always up our ass about that, about like, we're so ugh to love, but like. What? No, no. Oak to love Lev's new album

Oak to love is fucking great You mean like dudes Yeah but it's like Isn't that just what being a bro is Is like All right Yeah yeah

Like you're a man is supposed To have a tough shell You know Yeah I think we should get crabs after this Lobster roll still good Huh Yeah

Apparently red lobster's on its way back Oh it is Yeah Get a good boil there But no I mean Sometimes my wife will be like You know

say some of that emotional shit and I'll be like you just want a gay guy. What do you mean say emotional? She'll be like, you know, no, look. You need to be like whatever, more emotional and I'll just like, no, you want a gay guy. Yeah. You're a luck, honey. I'm like, you want a chick or a gay guy? I got that. Those pants make you look fat. Yeah, exactly.

Exactly. You have to give them a taste of a gay guy so they realize you don't want that much. Those shoes, the 1980s cold. Shoulder pads. You just not being real bitchy, too? Like, you have passive aggressive mom? You go, oh. Someone's enjoying the summer. Yeah, we can't all go to the gym in the summer

You're like real nice about it I decided to take the day off of grooming today But is that real? Do people fuck like You know like I love like like it's like a I think Italian guys do Yeah, but then I think about that mother Yeah of course No certain guys do in there

They try to put performances down As I say there's nothing gay That's what I used to do I'm like a 14 year old boy I'm fucking clapping I'm like Oh, I thought you said you'd fuck a 14-year-old boy. I'm trying, yes, but why would I...

True is it? I want to tell people new things out of here. What do you say when you fuck, Danny? What do you mean, what do I say? Like, what do you say? You're welcome. You're welcome, deeper. Nothing.

Like, what do you talk about all your fucking? You know what he says? He says one at a time, boy. I don't talk about it? All right, chop, chop, chop, your time's done. I don't talk about anything. Walk me through you fucking. You walk in.

A girl once told, I always bring this up in the podcast, but a girl that Danny dated said he was the best fuck she ever had. We were just talking about this on our show. I used to get that. Yeah? Yeah. And then all those women who told me that became lesbians. Well, you got to the top.

The one who said that actually was a lesbian, and then went with me and then became a lesbian again, and then we got back together, and I think she's not a lesbian anymore, though. So you were the only man she ever found. They get to the top of the ladder, you know. Yeah. Yeah. They realize this is a little better than this. This is all it is.

Yeah. Yeah, I don't know what to make of it. You talk a lot during sex? Oh, all the time. Oh, Leff's doing his bits. I'm like, is a guy that's a pizza? Can you believe what's going on with comedy right now? It's over.

Two spots on a whole weekend at the cellar. I don't know. I don't talk at all. Like, what do you? I haven't said a word in years. I haven't said a word in years. That is a young man's game. One way, they'll go, do you like this?

Is that? Whose dick is that? like we're married I don't care if you like this who's pussy who owns that pussy I own my wife's pussy every oh yeah my wife can't wait for you to leave a half of what my wife talks sometimes I tell her to shut up yeah that's what yeah a hell of the shoulder shut up do you put the finger over her mouth she's like I turn our fucking head back around no no no look that way literally because talking's really dude I mean but even like like good fucking like fucking a whore is like you're drunk it's a whore you're like yeah you shouldn't

fucking fingers down a choke on you're a fucking dirty slut you get to burn her with a cigarette yeah you fucking use her as an as an ashtrague is that what we call it but at least then you're talking this is what that was just Kyle would not figuring a girl's mouth while we're fucking his ass Kyle was like very funny make fun of the Egyptians It exploded himself.

Dude, the thing is, like, the last time I dirty talked. Like, the last time I was, like, drunk and got, like, into it. Huh? What dirty talking about her? Oh, I dirty talking about it. I can't afford it anymore. I had to make some cuts. Nah, my wife found my own.

He's like, I don't like this at all. And he's like, I'm just going to cut all this. The last time I was dirty talking to my wife, I was like, drunk. It was in the moment. it was dirty. I'm still like ashamed of that. I'm like, uh,

you're embarrassed. I'm like, I can't believe I said that. That's disgusting. Like, I should fucking find religion, you know. Couples love that though when like they,

they both get almost blackout drunk. If I'm real drunk and then they, and then they fuck like they don't know each other. That's like, and they go, why did we, it was like we were so drunk we thought we were cheating on each other. We both disassociated.

Oh, I was, I was so drunk. I thought I was cheating on you. That's why I fucked you so well. That's the best sex in a relationship. I was too. drunk to realize I fucked my wife last night

I gave her the good stuff oh my god put it in second gear this time is that not the best sex you have with your wife those when you're both drunk but not a condom when you're joking what are you up there? Why do you have

so many? Don't tell my wife I'm so drunk that's all the whole time you're fucking your wife don't talk you're wasting you look just like a prettier version younger version of her i never do this with the br i never do this move with the brad you're clean aren't you you promise me you're clean i'm so funny i'm very she on your wife mistake with your wife fuck me dude you're saving her your phone and shit nah that dumb bitch

will never find that that dumb bitch you never couldn't get me slipping by the way the name's Daryl oh yeah I live in a visit him from the West Coast see my name Daryl I'll come visit you like once a month I've got this arranged that doesn't for that dumb bitch on my god damn all right that's a chat by girlfriends that was a fucking I told you was a legendary boys panel I knew it man just shout out the fellas legendary it's very good podcast Cockfight podcast Yeah, definitely the

Cockfight podcast has taken off these days actually does seem like it's fucking kind of on a slow instead definitely upward slant for sure You know, in the market that's shrinking right now

We're doing okay It's actually true It's not even fake That's sort of true I was so excited Boys and what's the channel Just look up Cockfight podcast on YouTube

Cockfight podcast Left for Calm Tiro Yeah please come on We have like special We have very fun We do like do challenges We do like a monthly special video your wives.

Hell yeah. That's my 200 subscribers. No, this is a fucking blast. You guys are the best. It's great. All right, peace, boys.