The Boyscast with Ryan Long - GANDHI IS A F*CKBOI w/ Are You Garbage

Episode Date: March 18, 2022

We're joined by Kevin & Foley from the Are You Garbage podcast and cover the Jussie Smollett situation, trashiest politicians of all time, abundance manifestation coaches and finally put a nail in the cheese dream debacle. Ryan @ryanlongcomedy Danny @dannyjokes Kevin @kevinryancomedy Foley @foleygrams https://www.patreon.com/theboyscast SUPPORT THE SPONSORS AT: Butcherbox.com/boyscast - Free Ground Beef For Life + $10 Off Athleticgreens.com/boyscast - Free 1 Year Of Vitamin D & 5 Free Travel Packs Joincrowdhealth.com - Promocode BOYSCAST - First 6 months $99 Breathefum.com/boyscast - Promocode BOYSCAST For 10% Off LEAVE US A FIVE STAR REVIEW! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

And you can tell our friends, and they can have my things when we're dead But we don't end forever, but we don't end forever Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the boys cast The cast exclusively for the boys The boys are back in town Some people might think that you're talking about a cast that you put on your arm or your leg But that's not what you're talking about I was thinking about a cast you put on your penis, for a sprained penis A sprained penis, and you might think we're talking about a cast that you put on your arm or your leg. I was thinking about a cast you put on your penis for a sprained penis.

A sprained penis. You might think we're talking about that. You might think we're talking about a system, a cast system. I'm into a cast system. And we're not talking about that, a cast system where it goes, guys and girls. I would have done it that order. A cast system.

I'd have done it in an opposite order than that. I've been saying that we went to an Indian yeah, we went to an Indian wedding and there was elephants and I went to an American wedding and there was an elephant too. The bride. No. The bride. In the scope. In the scope, American pets.

Ladies and gentlemen, we have a pretty cool episode this week. Awesome episode. Our boys from the RU Garbage podcast who are, you know, these are some of the funniest guys and we hang out with them a lot in real life and just generally some of the quickest, funniest people ever. So I went to a bunch of different stuff on the podcast this week, which garbage politicians and things that they've done over the years. You know, we got to the bottom of the cheese dream debacle oh yeah i mean just fucking can you handle the suspense about whether whether they liked it or not cheese dream but there's a bunch of that sort

of stuff and then as always me and dp on the patreon this week and we got some of the funniest articles this week so i have to watch the episode if you want uh one of the normal episodes where we go through a bunch of stuff uh there was a new term alert radical monogamy that was probably my favorite one this week but so there's that and then we are in nashville uh the 25th and the 26th so next friday saturday come through nash Nashville hang out with us Friday Saturday and then yes without further ado

we did a couple hours with some of our boys the funniest guys time flew RU Garbage Podcast run it woo we're in the place to be

the fucking first four person boys cast four and a half with some fucking I don-person boys cast. Four and a half. With some fucking real. I don't know. I'll put in an extra half there. We'll go five.

A full five. There's a fiver. Just some real dogs. The authorities on. How did you get to be the authority on being garbage? Yeah. I don't know how that. That's not coming into real questions.

It's like Tim Ferriss. So what is. You just make yourself the authority. Sure. That is. I think our credentials speak for ourselves. Yeah, we are two dirtbags from Philly, so it definitely makes sense. Yeah.

Outside of my house two days ago, because it's real trash heap outside of, you know, first and 14th, like East Village. Sure. Oh, yeah. You're in the heart of it. Body. And last night, no, no, two nights ago, these guys were getting in a fist fight, yelling and screaming.

And then the one guy goes, he pepper sprayed me. He pepper sprayed me. He starts rolling on the ground, screaming. It's like, call the cops. No one wanted to call the cops. Eventually, we called the cops. You called the cops? Did you fucking rat?

No, we called the ambulance. Fucking narc-ass shit, dude. God damn. What's this, a set-up attack? You're fucking walking around your neighborhood now, right? Jesus Christ. On a fucking giant youtube page being like yeah i fucking ratted on the shady dudes at first and 14 i didn't say i know who did

it we're gonna have to like modulate your voice and fucking blur them out your face for this i called the cops on them snitch man You have a little safety sash running around. Welcome back to the rat podcast, everybody. All right, knock it off over there, you hosers. Quit screwing around. He's got the hose out, spraying him with a garden hose. The hose is actually the fucking... He lives in like the craziest...

Oh, it's... You live in Heroinville. Yeah, and when he moved there, it was like none of that. And then all of a sudden, they just started this COVID, sort of this open airair flea market. Market, yeah. Heroin flea market thing. DB, am I just flipping that screen over there?

Yeah. Dude, yeah, it's me and 6ix9ine. But no, I called the ambulance because this person was actually dying. Jesus. From pepper spray? Nah. You know, he first, I guess. That can't kill you.

Well, they were fighting first, but. Unless you boof it. I don't know. Maybe. Butt chug it. It was more the girl than me. I'm going to pass the buck here. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Ryan's ratting on the other rat. Ryan's fucking going... Wait, your lady called? Your girl called? You guys are sort of missing the part where I'm a hero. He thought he was going to come in and we were going to... Yeah, he didn't save anything. You're not getting the key to the city, you narc.

A pretty good one that also happened is Russia. They got rid of McDonald's, basically. Yeah, yeah. So there's this guy. That would have been it for me. Well, it's kind of the Russian you. Are you talking about the big fat guy who chained himself to the door? Yeah.

What? He literally looks like you. And he chained himself to the door. He's like, they got us fat for the past 25 years and abandoned us when we need them the most you walk out on me he goes yeah he's like he's like you got us accustomed to eating this food for 30 years and then you just leave yeah he's a real man that's cold-blooded dude he genuine but he's like the son of a honey mustard or something to hold me over a couple of fries dude i saw today actually that there's a black market now for McDonald's food in Russia.

And someone was selling a Big Mac on like their equivalent of Craigslist for 40 bucks. Jesus. It's like Cheeseburger Eddie in the longest short. I guess people went

and bought them all and then froze them knowing that they were about to lose McDonald's. Yeah. That's something you would do. I would not fucking freeze McDonald's.

What do they know? The Russians don't know anything. They think that they're that the guys are in there are heroes, right? That's what they're being told. Yeah, that's kind of the line. How does that still work? Well, I mean, I think it's coming to light now. Well, one, it's like you can't even, you know, people are scared to say anything.

But you can't go on. You live in Moscow. You can't go on Twitter and find out what the real tea is. No. Well, as of, I believe, tomorrow. The real tea. Yeah, they're cutting down the internet. As of tomorrow or even today, Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, all gone.

It's like China style. Like, there's no... Wait, who's doing that? The Russian government. Russia. Damn. Yeah, just like China. Nah, everything's cool.

Don't worry about it. Yeah, kind of. What the hell is the Ukraine? Keep it moving. Yeah, they're sort of saying it's unrelated. They go, why are you shutting down the internet? They go, we were going to do that anyway. It's just weird timing.

It's a coincidence, I swear. It's crazy that they can get away with that shit. They throw you in prison if you go, hey, I don't like this. Did you see that woman? She had a blank sign at a protest. Just holding a blank piece of fucking poster board. She was just like,

she didn't know which one she was going to. She had a marker in her pocket ready to fill it out. There was, they saw, they showed today someone who, she's so fucked, but she went on their like state newscaster and the woman's like reading the news,

but obviously all like the propaganda news. And then she just like walks behind her and holds like a sign that says no war. And you're like, oh, yikes. So, isn't that a fingernail factory for a couple of days but isn't that if you're the if you're a russian isn't kind of saying oh we don't want war isn't that what they're saying they're like hey we don't want

war either we just give us what's ours and then we'll move on yeah i'm not like no no you're new yeah you're making it you're yeah you're jumping a couple of steps well here is saying you don't want war is almost like picking a side. Yeah, yeah. No, no, no. There are if anything against Putin is like you're like, yeah,

it's bye bye. Putin. Interesting. Little beady eyed fucker. This is what the oh, apparently Putin. This is one Putin thing is that I didn't know this,

but he apparently has like a bunch of kids from different marriages and stuff like that. He's been getting out there. I mean, if you were the richest man in the world, you would too. You think he's the richest man in the world?

For sure. He is 100% the richest man in the world. Really? Oh, yeah. Dude, I've always said this, but all those lists that come out and they go, here are the 100 richest people in the world. The 100 richest people in the world, not on those lists. Yeah, 100%.

Really? Yeah. They're like the families who they don't want people to know. And even on top of that, even the really rich people, there is that wealth management component of it where you go, first of all, you have six kids and uncles and aunts, and they all own a portion of it just for straight up. Yeah, it's all been dispersed.

And it's all sitting in trust somewhere. Yeah, and you give people estates, but you go, you're the only one that can control it. So essentially they own it technically, only technically. That's what they were trying with the sanctions, to go out to the oligarchs,, they own it technically, only technically. Yeah. That's what they were trying with the sanctions to go out to the oligarchs is they're holding all of his money. Yeah.

And they are. They're fucking... Nick Cannon ain't one of the richest guys in the world. Which is sort of funny, though, if you were just like... One of the funniest, though. Out wow and out gets me. When you're... If your government starts basically a war and then all of a sudden they're taking away

your boats from other countries and you go, what do I have to do with all this? Well, I mean, pretty much you go, just because I'm friends with him, you're like just seizing my property. They're for sure friends with him. I mean, there's a guy who has a $500 million boat and isn't boys with poodles.

That boat's sick though. You see that one boat that has a missile defense system on it? Oh yeah. Fucking sweet. It looks like a shoe. Yeah, that's pretty cool. But I'd say he's friends with them The way that you go Oh I'm

You know Any Mark Zuckerberg's Gonna be like Palling around With whoever's in government Because otherwise You're screwed No this is different

Because they got all their money Because when the Soviet Union Ended Yeah those guys It was all like Let's all work together They don't look Like the government of

Like you know The government owns A fucking gold mine And they go Okay we gotta give this To somebody Yeah Who gets it

And then You take it You hang on to it, I get 20%. Exactly, and you kick down money. Vladimir gets 40%. Yeah.

Well, it's basically the love child's 18 and she was on social media and then everyone was... The kid's 18 or the wife's mom? The kid's 18

and the kid's kind of fit too. I'm sure. Why are you sure? You think... Well, you would disappear her. You think the girl is not... That's how freezing 40s got. It's good genes. This guy's fucking banging fucking crack out freezing 40s?

It's good genes. This guy's closing on fucking Moscow 12s. Oh, 100%. So she's pretty hot and she's been out there like being on TikTok and social media.

She has like a couple hundred K followers so nothing to write home about. What's she saying? Against her dad or for her dad? Oh, she doesn't really do that stuff. She's just kind of like my new purse that I got

and stuff like that because the mom's super rich from, you know, the payouts and stuff like that. Her mom was what? Like a cleaner or something? The mom's a cleaner and now sheouts and stuff like that. Her mom was what, like a cleaner or something? The mom's a cleaner and now she owns half a Russian bank. She's got a gold mine.

Here's a steel smelter. Yeah, she does. Right now, she owns a part of a Russian bank. Yeah, Olga's Bank or something. I bet you alimony in Russia with the oligarchs is probably real funny. I have an earth mover? What the fuck is that?

You get a high-powered job. Thanks for the MiG-29, Dad. You've never seen that in America? You start as the janitor, you work your way up to manager the other janitors, then they put you in charge of the banks. It's a lateral move. Wasn't that that Will Smith movie?

Isn't that how that happened what i don't get is it and i know he's a completely different animal but i wouldn't be able to deal with the fact with i want to keep all the like i want to take over ukraine i want to be in control knowing that all those people don't want like he's like the boyfriend nobody wants to be with i guess it depends on where in russia well he thought that they would be very welcoming he thought they'd be more stoked well there's a lot of russian people in ukraine who are like we want to be in russia so then not like a crazy amount but there's a percentage of me he just thought he was gonna be like thank you so much yeah under fire yeah good yeah it was awesome but i mean whatever it's just kind of a different side of it. But his side is very US-meddled, like nonstop and all this sort of stuff, right?

But if you look on the internet, every review now. But it came out three years ago, and there's all these reviews from this month being like Russian propaganda, all this stuff, right? It's funny. Anything is Russian, dude. Anything that just even goes against the narrative in any way, you go, oh, you're a Russian shill. Yeah, but it's funny.

All the reviews, if you look before, pretty good film. Yeah, very informative. As of a month ago, every review was like, this is trash. Oliver Stone's Ukraine Under Fire. Oh, really? Ukraine On Fire. Does everybody Netflix delete this?

Why are you keeping this up? Kind of thing, yeah. Wait, they're saying Oliver Stone is a- It's on Amazon. Is working with the with the Russians well YouTube took it down and this is one of those things that other people probably said this but it really was I wasn't you know in the huge hurry to go uh cruise through every single Ukraine doc ever made obviously you want to know what's up but then YouTube made a big stink and they're taking it down from places you go all right well this is the one to watch yeah now I want to see it he made it like four years

ago it was about their like a revolution uprising they had in 2014 there is some crazy stuff like there's this one guy that was uh it wasn't ukraine it was uh georgia i think or whatever but he basically got uh he was embezzling all this money or whatever and then he came back to america and then america put him in charge of another country and they're like this is the guy that he was basically like embezzling money I don't know enough to say but there's these wild things where people that were like petty you know political criminals in

other countries then they just move them to a new country and gave them some pretty odd job. Kind of sounds like the Catholic Church kind of how they do that. Moving you around in a new game. Three card Monty. Nah we're at St. Pete's now. It's like have you heard my rap? Everything's cool. Kids know how to keep their mouth shut over there. It was kind of that. Well, anyways, the love child, basically, she stopped posting anything because everyone

was on her thing being like, yo, tell your dad to cut it out, right? Your dad's lame, dude. Your dad stinks. Your dad sucks. They started moving people in, though. I saw the thing today was they had a mayor of whatever city they took over there's a video of that of like fucking six armed guys just leading this mayor out of his building and like three hours later some lady like yeah i'm the new mayor yeah oh yeah for sure everything's calling new uh government puppet regimes that's power people

think that they put the gag or that putin put the gag on her so that's the vibe on the internet people think she doesn't even admit people said word came down from up top that she had to cut it out with her instagram imagine that's like he's dealing with stories all this shit and then he has to just call up his like illegitimate one of his daughters be like yo please can you fucking just chill on the post right now over the country okay because i'm trying to take over all of europe can you just chill for a minute give me a minute do you guys think he makes a harder move after let's say he did roll through and it was nice and easy well you know what the scary thing is is they had some missile went off i don't think it's been nice and easy they had a missile go off 10 miles away from the pole yeah they were hitting

that airfield well they're trying and you're like you know imagine i don't know if they're i'm sure their range is like their range of error is not that small but like dude they accidentally just fucking fire a missile into poland you're like, it's over. Yeah. It's like, we're just like, it's game on. Do you think it's total commitment after that? We just start laughing? I think you have to.

I think there's no choice. If they fire a missile into some NATO country, it's just like, all right. I mean, they say they have 6,000 nukes. Yeah, but America has fucking 20,000. Yeah. No, they actually have more than us. No, no, no. America has the most.

No. Really? Russia does. Yeah. Actual warheads, they actually have more than us. No, no, no. America has the most. No. Really? Russia does, yeah. Actual warheads, they do. Yeah, but it's like, how many of those work? Yeah, and where are they from? They told us that bullshit, because I'm 46, so they told us that bullshit in the 80s. And then you find out when the curtain came down, when they were doing those mayday parades,

they were all filled with fucking pinball parts. Yeah, yeah, it was all for show. None of that shit worked. All for show. And not to mention, you saw them roll in with that first wave a couple weeks ago. Their equipment was dog shit. They were driving around in things from MASH. Oh, yeah.

They had a lot of- Old trucks and shit. Yeah, it is a lot of old stuff. Get the fuck out of here. Did you see Trump on full send? And he was saying, he's like, while I was in office, he's like, I upgrade. He's like, I renovated all of our nukes. He's like, so now we have all the best nukes.

Did he? Yeah, he was on this podcast basically just being like, yeah, we got all the fucking paint. Gave him a paint job and stuff like that.

He goes, he said he renovated the nukes. He was a fucking kitchen. Look at those 20s on that nuke. New stainless steel appliances on that bad boy. Put a spoiler on a couple of them. Plays Euro trash music as it goes.

It's the final countdown. I think he's full of shit. He's not going to start lobbing nukes. No, no, no. I mean, unless he just... And I think even if he did throw one, I don't think everybody would just throw it. You see what they're saying?

He has roid rage. He's all juicing. People are saying that he's all roided up now because he's getting old. Sure. Because he had those shirtless photos on the horses and stuff. Yeah. He's got to keep that going.

So now people are like, oh, maybe this is just roid rage. This guy's all jacked up on D-ball. Yeah. Get this kid in Eddie. Slow him down a little bit, will you? Putin's geared up. Well, speaking of things that may not be true, Smollett, you guys obviously saw this.

Oh, jeez. Smollett. But I actually thought when I saw the stuff that i was like i kind of actually like him now i thought that was all over i thought he was already in jail or so you know he basically the whole the sentence happened and he did the whole thing where he sort of came out and he goes they try to kill me i'm not suicidal i'm an innocent man and there are still people out there being like we need to free this guy or whatever. And honestly, after that whole display, I,

I walked away being like, you have to hand it to him going down with the lie to this degree. Oh yeah. Full blown crazy. Well, she's turning it into a conspiracy when nobody ever thought it was like, nobody's ever claimed there's any sort of conspiracy angle. Well, that's what I'm saying.

Like out of nowhere to be, it's like he, he's ultimately in there for like a fucking, like a parking ticket or something. You know what I mean? And he's, yeah. And he's being like, if I go to, if someone kills me, it's like, he's ultimately in there for like a fucking like a parking ticket or you know what i mean and he's yeah and he's being like if i go to if someone kills me it's like dude no one's trying to kill guys it was you and two guys used to jerk off with that's all it was what does he know yeah there's gonna be so many guys in there who just like can't get the boot off their car that's exactly that's what i'm saying there's like there's like yeah i did this

yeah it's it's insane to think that like to make it seem like it's bigger than it is is he still saying that it was real a hundred percent it's real and he goes this is all like racism homophobia everything is all the reason why he's said islamophobia i'm not even islamic but some people might think that i am but i might convert if i do i might kill myself i didn't kill myself oh he's coming out of jail full fucking oz style like well he's basically but they put him in the psych ward too right he's crazy yeah yeah but i fucking Oz style. Well, he's basically, but they put him in the psych ward too, right? He's crazy. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

But I would do the same thing. Well, maybe. See, that was one thing I was wondering about. Let me back up a bit. You said he's crazy. And if you think about it, he knows that he didn't do it. So how would he be crazy?

Unless he's, the only way he's crazy if he actually convinced himself that he believes this happened, which he doesn't. So I'd say it's all still part of a show. Which I think would make you crazy if you have that level of commitment to be like,

I'm going to make this speech like Epstein-style, you know, like there's these huge government factors working. You don't think he walks away and he's like, honestly, I'm pretty sure they bought that one. I don't think so, no. I think he's literally like Suckers. Dude, you are such a good actor. I mean, dude.

Or maybe this is all just like for his reel or something. You know what I mean? When he gets out, he's like, listen. He walked away and he goes... Moron. He calls his agent. How did it look? Would you rather do 150 days in solitaire, which I assume...

Solitaire? Solitaire. Isn't that what they call it? Solitary. Solitaire is the card game, which you probably play in solitary. I got to play Uno for 200 days? Or would you rather fucking say you're crazy and spend 100 days in the psych ward? You're lying in bed, jello, watching TV.

Yeah, get some Valium for a couple of weeks and go, oh, I'm good. Totally. You just wake up. You go, oh, that was easy. Yeah. That way you're also like a victim when you get out. You have like, oh, I was off my meds. This doctor did this.

Now I'm good. Now you have like the rebuilding. I still didn't like, oh, I was off my meds. This doctor did this. Now I'm good. Now you have like the rebuilding. I still didn't do it, but I was out for that. I still didn't do it, but I would definitely. What about the other two dudes? Did they get arrested? The other two dudes are fucking cooking still. I think they never got caught. They're not part of it. They testified against him.

They probably got some sort of sweet ordeal. They still participated in this fake hate. They rolled on him. It's also sort of funny to think that... Like Ryan did with those guys. Yeah, exactly.

It's funny you brought this story up here, Nark. Yeah, no kidding. If him and his boy had faced Ryan... If I could kick that out of my apartment, I didn't do it.

I'm crazy. I am not suicidal. There's nobody fighting outside the whole time? Somebody just pay the fine and get out of here. It's a misdemeanor, dude.

You guys checking through my bag, finding pepper spray? No, don't look at it! Pepper spray in a Subway sandwich? You ever have pepper spray? You pepper spray guys? No, I obviously do it just, you know, because if you're going to be pepper spraying everyone and carrying around, you need to know how it feels.

We tase. In college, somebody came to a party with a taser. Hazing, yeah, yeah, hazing. One of my boys. You tase each other's balls, then you suck the balls. We've all been there. They got to blow them now. And you're sitting there, and after enough beer, you're like,

after the ninth game of beer pong, you're like, all right, dude, fucking zap me. And it is not fun. Well, you went for it. Oh, yeah, we all did. Where'd you get tased? Just in the arm. And you fall. You just drop. It's like short it. Oh, yeah, we all did. Where'd you get dazed? Just in the arm. And you, like, you fall.

Like, you just, and then drop. Yeah, it's like short circuits. Yeah, exactly. Yeah, we did the dog collar. You ever do the dog collar? What? No, you guys. Like the electric fence?

You put one on? You put one around your neck. Oh, but it's an actual dog collar. Yeah, it's the electric one, though. Yeah. It's for the electric fence that people put in their yards. You guys don't have them up there? Yeah, yeah, we got that.

We don't have tasers, though. They're illegal. Really? And pepper spray, yeah. Wow. Pepper spray's illegal? Yeah, you're not allowed to have any of that shit in Canada. What about bear spray?

You gotta have bear spray. Bear spray you could have. Yeah, I think so. Like if you're at a gay club or whatever. Get them out. Old Bay's illegal up in Canada. Is that Frank's hot sauce? Get out of here, you hosers.

Frank's Red Hot is the actual line. That's the line. That's a three to five. Anything with more Scoville units. Frank's Red Hot is the actual line. That's the line. That's a three to five. Anything with more Scoville units than Frank's Red Hot is illegal. You get wrapped up. Is that crystal? Get in the cage. No, you put it on your neck.

When you walk in front of the TV, it triggers it. Why? The dog collar. I don't know. So people are putting it on their dogs to train their dogs, and then they're just getting zapped right and left in front of the TV. Right in front of the TV. That's why the dogs never go near the TV. But we used to get drunk, put it getting zapped right and left in front of the TV. That's why the dogs never go near the TV.

But we used to get drunk, put it on, and push each other in front of the TV. It was a good time. That sounds fun. Sounds like a lot of ladies were at this party. That's nothing like the electricity of a taser. No, the tasers were no fun. It was like the cattle prod type one. I was loving the idea that at the

institution, it's all guys that are just lying to be crazy. Like it's, you know, so basically it's the funnest place to be is the insane asylum. Because every guy's just like, the guards come in and everyone goes, and everyone goes, oh, oh, oh, the CIA, they're watching me. Then they walk away and everyone's like, all right, are you up for cards? It'll be incredible. They put him in the fucking psych ward and it's him and actually Jeffrey Epstein, but

they don't tell anybody. And then he's gets out. He goes, Jeffrey Epstein was in there. Sure he was. You really are crazy, huh? Clinton came to see him every day. I swear to God. Lying again, Jesse.

Dude, he goes, can't get help for you in that fucking psych ward. 150 days though. That's something to shake a stick at. Is that, is by the way, is that trash Frank's Red Hot? Do you find that garbage? Oh, I love it. That is a Canadian thing, right? No. Oh, well, people here seem to not use find that garbage? Oh, I love it. That is a Canadian thing, right? No.

Oh, well, people here seem to not use it the way that people from Toronto use it. Like, that was the motto. It's where I put that shit on everything. Yeah, that's their slogan now. Yeah, they have that in America. Oh, well, I didn't say they don't have it here. It felt like I've never met people. Well, here's a perfect example.

When you go to a pizza shop, I feel like where I'm from, it's everywhere. When you go to a pizza shop here, they have the more'm from, it's everywhere. When you go to a pizza shop here, they have the more Tabasco. Yeah, it's rarely out at places, like restaurants. That's not the hot sauce you're really going to get somewhere.

It's not as popularized. No, I don't know. Although I went for brunch yesterday and they gave it to us as the hot sauce. There you go. I like the tapas stuff. Well, here's the thing that...

The lady with the... The chalupa... Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. The little... The Mexican lady? With the wooden top. Yeah, with the the chalupa oh yeah yeah the little the Mexican lady with the wooden top yeah with the wooden top yeah it's alright

it's alright wooden top's fine Frank's Red Hot Sauce is way better I don't know why anyone thinks Tabasco is better than that I thought you hate hot sauce

I don't I do but I like Frank's Red Hot it's not that hot company man that's the whole thing I used to fry this guy literally like you put black pepper

on his food he goes like that's the spiciest thing I've ever eaten I don't like it anybody got a glass of milk that's actually true what am pepper on his food. He goes like, that's the spiciest thing I've ever eaten in my life. I don't like it. Anybody got a glass of milk? That's actually true. What am I, on hot ones here? What's going on? He's sweating.

Oh, God! That is honestly Ryan on hot ones. Go, okay, we're going to eat a pepper wing. Lemon pepper wing. Ryan's like, whoa! Dude, relax. It's just celery. Take it easy. I'm eating the bread that's sitting there for if you get too hot. And I go, oh, okay, let's take a break.

And Ryan's dipping it just right in the milk. How many more do we have? We haven't started yet, Ryan. I've actually done that a lot of times where I got too hot and had to go run to the fridge and put the bread in my mouth. And then just like, you've never done that? Where you go, I ball up the bread

and do a full bread in my mouth. Well, that doesn't actually work. You need a dairy. It does work. No, that works temporarily, but dairy actually removes the shit from your dairy. That works temporarily, but dairy actually- Temporarily is good enough at the time. Dairy actually removes the shit from your mouth. Yeah, I don't fuck with it.

That's why the Indian food, they put the yogurt on the plate, right? Yeah. That's a different heat, though. That's stronger. I know. You get a hot tikka masala, fucking turn your lights out. I actually ruin my whole day. If I get too into any hot stuff, it'll ruin my week, potentially.

It's a real problem for me one time actually at an indian place in toronto i was eating it was something like one of those dishes and there was one of those like you know the spiciest pepper i've ever eaten in my life but it was hidden in the dish and i was all high and i was like eating it and i like was eating fast and i just like didn't chew it and i bit down on the pepper once and then just like swallowed it and it was the hot, I was like, holy fuck. And then I burped and it came back up.

And so it was like, again, the hottest thing. It was, oh man, it was fucking. I did, I went to Fight Club with, it was Mike Harrington, I believe. You were there, right?

And they had some, what was it? Do you remember? It was Fight Club during the pandemic on a rooftop in Brooklyn. What was the food? And so they were like, we're making barbecue skewers for all the comics.

And so it was Corinne. They made Corinne Fisher these shrimp skewers. And so she didn't show up. So they were like, do you want them? And they did shrimp skewers and then ghost peppers for some reason. Even though she didn't tell anybody. You can't just wing that. They were just going to dose her?

They didn't tell anybody. And it was dark. So they go, Ryan, Danny, do you guys want these? Because she didn't. Like, didn't tell anybody. You can't just wing that. They were just going to dose her? They didn't tell anybody. And it was dark. So they go, Ryan, Danny, do you guys want these? Because like, she didn't. And we go, sure. And we bite down. And I thought I was eating a scallop. Like, honestly, I thought I was eating a scallop.

And then we were, dude, it was like full, like, you know, nose running, eyes running. We're like running around trying to just like find anything. Somebody get me bread. Buddy, it was actually probably the worst thing in my life. I was like, what the, is this a fucking prank? trying to just like find anything somebody get me bread buddy it was actually probably the worst thing in my life I was like

what the is this a fucking prank it's insane I'm walking around grabbing people's drinks and you know spraying them in my face it was crazy

and then you go you were gonna give these to Corinne you psychopath she would have dude I've never experienced hotness like that it was re

and then the one guy who goes oh I'm the guy who eats hot sauce, that David guy, he goes, oh, I eat hot sauce, whatever.

He goes, I don't care. He took one bite and then he started running around and he couldn't handle it. I hate that guy. Those guys stink. Those guys that like,

that that's their badge of honor. I could do it, dude. I'm like, I got three, you're like, dude, just shut up. It's not a skill. I ate hot sauce in New Orleans one time.

It was 5,000 Scovels. No big deal. Fuck out of here. Buddy, I have a bunch of friends like that. Their whole deal is they eat hot stuff. They go, Steve never enjoyed anything you eat. They're sitting there with the extra hot wings. They go, yeah, no, it's great.

More hot sauce. You go, you hate this. Who's this for? You don't enjoy it. We don't think you're cool for doing this. The fact, but they think you think they're cool, which is the saddest thing in all of existence. It's like how much how little respect you have for me to think i'm gonna be impressed that you eat hot stuff it's

crazy to me and they just need the spice to feel something yeah exactly there's that too where they go like this is really like i used to work at a wing place and they had like 30 different spices like all the way up and uh the last one was the it was suicide which was like really hot than homicide and you had to sign a waiver you had to sign a waiver it's always those it's always And the last one was suicide, which was really hot, then homicide. And you had to sign a waiver. You had to sign a waiver. It's always those. It's always suicide, homicide.

What are you going to do? I mean, like, fucking. Just give me the statutory rape. Three alternate side parkings. You got to go heavy, you know. But, dude, every fucking weekend, some guy and his jerk-off buddies would come in and be like, he's going to do the homicide. I'm like, it's the same as a suicide. Nobody knows.

There was a place in Toronto that had that where you had to sign the waiver and then they put your name up on the board for life. And we had a buddy who did it. He did 44 of them and he's like, I didn't shit properly for a week. Jeez, I tell your butthole. It's also like, I don't know how official those waivers were

because I was 15 and I was the one like I didn't have legal authority to be like signed this to enter into an agreement of not pressing charges. I'm like dude I'm 14. I didn't check your ID or anything. Put your wingsaw stamp here. Where'd you guys get the old beer cans?

They're all props We have a prop department Pretty sweet So this was the controversy on the show a little bit Is basically That my favorite meal is a cheese dream And people have been Some people

What's a cheese dream? They, triple brackets, have been calling it Ryan, explain to them what the cheese dream is There's some Tim Hortons thing. Don't be smirch, Tim Hortons. When I said you guys were coming on, a lot of people wanted us to get to the bottom of the cheese dream debacle. Lay it on us.

Basically, a cheese dream is a piece of toast and then American cheese processed. One slice of that. Then you take wieners and you chop up the wieners and you put them on top of the American... Again, nobody take wieners and you chop up the wieners and you put them on top of the... A hot dog? Again, nobody says wieners, Ryan.

But you all know what a wiener is, right? Canadians are cute. He literally just... No, I don't say wieners. Don't let me in with this shit. I had to put it together. I figured it was a Canadian thing. But he told this before and I go, nobody says wieners.

It's hot dogs. And he goes, wieners. Well, he thinks that... Well, in my opinion, the hot dog includes the bun, so... No. Really? Okay, so what okay so but think about that's the craziest thing i've ever heard what i'm saying i said no what i'm saying

your honor if there is no bun is it still considered a wiener okay so when you go to a place would you do you go to them you go hey i'd like to order one hot dog and then could you put a bun on it please or do you just say the same thing i would say let me get a hamburger you know it's coming on a bun well but you have a. Don't forget to include the bun on this. No, you don't fuck me like last time. No, but you also don't call the patty. You call it a patty, not a hamburger. It's a hamburger.

Call it a hamburger. Let me get eight frozen hamburgers. That doesn't insinuate that they're all on a patty. A patty is a shape. Patty's like the shape. If you go buy eight frozen hamburgers, the bun's not in there. Okay, so what are wieners then? Nobody says

wieners. Yeah, you just made up a word and now we have to defend it. So you all knew what I was talking about. It's like a cutesy thing that eight-year-old kids draw on their school books. Yeah, it's like a cutesy thing your mom said when you were a child that you just carried on into your thirties. Nobody says wieners. I just thought that was Canadian innocence, to be honest with you. No, the Canadians do not say wieners.

A lot of people say wieners. No, they don't. Yeah, they're all under seven. Yes, yes. Can you cut my wieners? Yes. Pickies and wee-wees. Okay, what about Oscar Mayer wiener?

Did I just imagine that, or is that a thing? I'll give you that. I'll give you that, yeah, sure. But the nomenclature is hot dog. That's not what was written in the 70s, though. Well, so anyways, a hot dog without the bun. No, it was a hot dog cooked. So you basically get a hot dog.

You don't have the bun on it, so I have to keep reiterating for our viewers who don't. Do you cook the hot dog? Pre-cook the hot dog? No, you can do that, but sometimes what I would do is put the hot dog, because it depends on how, if you want the hot dog more cooked. So sometimes you put the hot dog in for 10 seconds, then you clip it up in the microwave. You clip it up, you put it on the bread that has the cheese on it. Are you using scissors to cut it or a knife?

Knife. I got a knife. Butter knife. You made that noise. Nothing sharp. And then you put the hot dog wieners on top of the cheese. And then you put the whole thing in the microwave. Or if you're classy, you put it in the toaster oven.

Okay. Is the bread toasted to begin with? I like to toast the bread. You toast the bread first. Put the cheese on it. Put your cut up ween Uh-huh. Okay. Is the bread toasted to begin with? I like to toast the bread, yeah. You toast the bread first, put the cheese on it, put your cut-up weenies on there, and then put that whole thing in the microwave and or toaster.

And it's called a cheese dream. Who made that up? Everyone knows that. His mother. I've never heard of that before. That's not a thing. I've never heard of that before. Of course.

No, that was... I'm talking about Ryan now. To be honest, I... Like, my Google cheese dream is an episode of this show going to come up. It's not going to be in Wikipedia. We are the first five pages of Google about cheese dream.

No, no. You've got to go to SEO guy. Because if you put sleeping pills on it to make you go to sleep, just call it a cheese dream. That's what you do to get a dog to take medicine. Yeah. Honestly, my dog, I don't think would eat that. A Seroquel dream. He's a very picky eater.

He thinks he's very classy, right? He goes, I would never I would eat it I'm not saying I'm not classy because I'm eating it the fact that you gave this insane name cheese dreams

I can picture being at a really fancy party and them having mini cheese dreams on a platter where where's this happening you and Jesse Smollett

yeah I can definitely picture that's prison food yeah that's what they make oh yeah and they go like we're making all this like prison food but with our I that's what they make oh yeah and they go like we're making

all this like prison food but with our like i should be so lucky to go to prison we have like not a lot of resources because we're in prison yeah like that's like prison i saw one that was amazing this guy was doing a cooking show after he got out of prison and he showed how they made pizza and they would take crackers and they would put a little like take crackers and they like a lunch and a little water and make dough i was like that's dude and they would put a little like take crackers and they like a lunch and a little water and make dough i was like that's dude and they make burritos and shit where they make it in like a bag of chips and then they fucking like water and they heat it by the radiator yeah smart sometimes dude have you ever seen them they take a tin can they put oil in it and they take like a fucking

battery battery with wires and they get the oil hot like cooking so they can they do oil and water yeah yeah they make like they're dangerous too it seems really dangerous what if they Oil hot cooking so they can deep fry shit? They do oil and water. Yeah, man. Damn. They make their own pots. It seems dangerous, too. It seems really dangerous. What if they get sent up the river for a couple of days? I mean, Jussie Small, that's probably learning all this stuff right now. Well, basically, the dream was the hot meal, and then he thinks it's not classy, and I was saying it's probably the best meal in the world.

I mean, it's your favorite food. I get that it's good, but it's trashy. It's actually not my favorite food. When's the last time you made one pretty recently yeah yeah I make them

I currently still do make them I'll tell you what he's not telling you is that he had a bout of COVID and he still has not got his taste back so he just you know what it really gets trashy

if you start making them on things other than bread like whatever bread like substances you have sure been there been there tortilla

at the top of a hamburger bun like you know what I mean that's when it starts to get a little Tortilla. Tortilla at the top of a hamburger bun. Like, you know what I mean? That's when it starts to get a little trashy. I can see you doing it on top of a hamburger bun, and you don't even do it. Like, you do it on the actual top, the cheese on top. Yeah. You're like with, like, the actual. Don't even turn it over.

Yeah, you don't even turn it over properly. A waffle, maybe. Although, I've seen people have asked us about that exact thing, where if you make a grilled cheese using a hamburger bun, is it trashy? The answer is yes, but they do do it inverted. So the brown part's on the inside. So when they toast it, it's still like toasting regular bread.

That would actually be better than if you had to do it. So the top and the bottom are on the inside. Yeah, if you had to do it, that would be the way. So it's then flat. And it's flat, yeah. That's pretty classy. Well, that one. Then my top meal that I would actually eat would be popcorn. So that's probably why I would say I put popcorn on top of the cheese.

Dude, one time we were doing that. Sounds like you're like a third grader's birthday party. That's your top meal? Your top meal is popcorn? Yeah, yeah. Like last meal, if I got one thing, it'd be like, I'll get me a bunch of moves. Anything in the world. They'd go to fucking Il Molino and get you whatever you're going.

Well, they wouldn't. They'd have to go to Cineplex. But you're still going. Regal. Yeah. Go to the AMC. If you're going. Well, they wouldn't. They'd have to go to Cineplex or whatever. You're still going. Regal. Yeah. Go to the AMC. Toronto, you gotta go up there. Dude, we one time

were doing a podcast during COVID. We were doing a podcast on Zoom and he just started eating fucking white like Wonder Bread and he was dipping it

into just like Tostitos salsa. Nothing wrong with that. Sometimes I'll dip it in raw tomato sauce. Damn. Cold. That's nasty. It's just cold

What's what you like I was expecting They'd be on my side here Kinda Honestly I feel so vindicated These guys are like Man

We know This is garbage If my mom fucking Gave me popcorn for dinner I'd fucking lose it I'd love that man So what about Do you like smart pop

With the cheddar I'll give you that It's okay No smart pop's fine That's a little higher class. Yeah, I'm more of a microwave popcorn second choice. First choice is straight from the movies. And I've done the thing where I order from Uber Eats

or whatever the app that has it is. You order popcorn from the movie. You can get movie popcorn? Yeah. Oh, yeah. During the pandemic, you couldn't go to- Promotion. So then they were like, we'll just send you popcorn.

Oh, like if you're like- Just for something for them to do. For like a movie night type thing yeah yeah so you order whatever it's probably too it's already a ripoff as is but you're ordering movie star popcorn i found is a hot that i respect not bad right that's all yeah that's all right but i do i do pretzel nuggies at the movies shout out to pretzel nuggets and cheese anti-annies or no annies is all right yeah annie anns you guys have a version of that in Canada We do Uncle Bill's

Yeah Uncle Ray's I can't remember What else is here Everything's a Furkin Russell's No Wetzel's Wetzel's is here right Yeah but I

No Wetzel's Wetzel's pretzels is here But I don't think it's in the northeast We have some I think it's out west We have honestly like Some identical version of it I don't even know

What the pretzel company is in Canada But we have one. And it's the same shit. It's just whatever, pretzels and hot dogs. Every second bar up there is a firkin. That's their big thing. The sword and the firkin, the dagger and the firkin. Well, it's like a chain of Irish pubs. They're just firkins?

I think there's some off-market ones, too. Sounds like an evil wizard. I know. I would never want to eat at anywhere called firkins. Yeah, me too. One other thing was the so as far as the not, we talked about it a bit already, but the Kanye West, Pete Davidson

thing, not to go into it always, but there is some, there is pretty new good garbage updates. I like how we're sliding around from World War III to popcorn to this. The cheese dream. It sort of is. I mean, dude, when they drop the fucking nukes on us, you're going to want that cheese dream recipe. You might have your last meal really soon.

That's when we're going to all be eating cheese dreams. When we have a couple of minutes, how long do you think we would get? And did Russia have missiles? They can't get it here, can they? You don't get what? I think Russia can't get a nuke here. They can. Yeah, I'm sure they could.

A sub? Well, a sub, yes. But also, I think they could probably get one from Portugal if they just took over all of Europe and got to the very edge. Yeah, but they would have to. They can't launch one now from Russia. We've got to be able to knock them out of the air. Yeah, maybe. I hope so.

I mean, dude, do you guys have cars? I honestly was thinking about it. I'm going to get in a car and I'm just driving. Well, I was thinking about it a couple weeks ago when Putin goes, when Putin goes, we're like initiating our nuclear defense thing. And that was the first time like nukes had been used. And I go, if there is like a nuclear attack on New York, like I'd be fucked. I can't get out of here. Because every rental car would be taken.

Every plane, bus, plane would be booked. You wouldn't even be able to get out of the city. No, it's like everything would be booked. I'd just be stuck in fucking New York. He's going to the GW on a razor. I'd be like, just get into the Canadian border. But I'm not, I'd just be stuck in fucking New York. He's going to the GW on a razor. I'd be like, just get into the Canadian border, but I'd be walking. You have fucking two rollerblades.

We take one each, and then you say, fuck that. Hold hands all the way. I didn't know they're Canadian, because they're holding hands on rollerblades. Let them in, you idiot. Yeah, is there anything more Canadian than that? I don't think you're going anywhere.

I think one detonates over Manhattan. I think that's a wrap. I'm saying even if, say, they were like... Yeah, because that's the problem, too, is this is the number one target. Sure. In all of America. Especially now that we're here.

They know it's high profile. This is ground zero of number one. If you can just make the podcasting center disappear. The only thing I can say is maybe they get cozy with China and then China nukes us from the West, and they get L.A. first. Well, it's funny. I don't mean to cut you off. There's a strong theory about that, that around April,

the way shit really goes south is in April if China makes a move on Taiwan. And the way they would do that is through a missile system. They have a certain amount of missiles, a certain amount of rockets, and they would use those immediately to light up Hawaii, other places that we have bases and where the Pacific fleet is. They would take Taiwan, and then they would immediately push us to go to a peace treaty. And the rest of the world would be like, fuck, we can't have these two fronts going. So they would force us into a peace treaty

after they just, you know, rescaled the geo-landscape. Yeah, the whole world order would just be totally... That would be dicey. Basically, with that scenario is that Russia and China are now combined allies

and they're the new world order. Which wouldn't make sense. Why the fuck... China's making money off us. are now combined allies and they're the new world order. Yeah. Which wouldn't make sense. Why the fuck? China's making money off us. And then what? Just so if we want to, and then if you want to buy stuff in New York,

now you're just paying with fucking Renminbi. Yeah. But would they? I obviously think. Anyways, if they take a layout first, I'm fine. If they take a layout though first, I'm fine with that. But like, what's the...

No more spots in the store. I do think there would... Why wouldn't they go after like Washington? Washington State? No, Washington DC. Oh. Like for like on an East Coast nuke, what do you really gain? You don't gain any sort of thing outside of New York.

The maximum fear slash damage would be New York City. Plus, honestly, I think I could be wrong damage would be New York City. Plus, honestly, I think, I could be wrong on this, but in terms of the nuclear fallout, I think D.C. would still be in radiations. Like, D.C. would probably be ruined with radiation. No, no, no, no. I think that's

way too far. Yeah, because I remember at 9-11... For the listener, we have no idea what we're talking about. Nobody's aware of that. I remember at 9-11, they were running all those scenarios of, you know, if a nuke dropped somewhere, like, and they were showing, like, here, you know, if it dropped in New York, like, Philly wouldn't be that. Like, there would be, like, radiation exposure, but it wouldn't be, like, you wouldn't be Sort of like cockroaches.

Yeah, no, I'm not saying you're going to be, like, nuked, like, or you're going to be fucked instantly, but you probably be like There would be be ramifications i think they'll be like nobody can live here for five years oh yeah maybe but like i'm saying even like phil like phil if they nuke new york like you can't philly's not gonna be inhabitable yeah it'll be like the chernobyl times a fucking hundred yeah or like well fuck me hiroshima and all that stuff living in cleveland yo yeah everybody will be moving that's where you want to go by the way that's where you want to hold up that's the last stand of uh civilization in america would be moving to Denver. That's where you want to go, by the way. That's where you want to hold up. That's the last stand of civilization in America.

Yeah, they have tons of bunkers there too, right? That's what they say. That's Sudbury, Ontario as well, which is, that or North Bay. One of them is, they have a NORAD site there. Really? Northern Ontario, yeah. Those are so cool. One of those two, and they have like crazy underground bunkers.

You know what you do in stand-up down there? Three arms from the nuclear bomb. Oh, you know that. Did you see that comic that went on Tim Dillon's thing, the Ukrainian comic? He's probably doing some fucking sets in those bunkers right now.

That's awesome. Oh, yeah. I forgot he had that guy on. There's a big circuit of guys that go up to Antarctica and do the shows. Is there really? Yeah, yeah, yeah.

And everyone's just fucking trash from the moment they wake up to the moment they go to sleep. Yeah. That's awesome. Well, do you guys have any thoughts on fucking your boy Pete Davidson? You guys got to know him. I actually just spent a weekend with him right before he started dating.

It was you or him, right? It was a toss-up. I thought I had put up a pretty good fight. Obviously, after it went the other way you can hang out anymore no i just love today that the that kanye west posted he goes listen like this is the stuff they put on this is my daughter out of their back this is why i fight so hard for my family they won't let me see her blah blah blah and then like kim gradashian posted underneath she goes stop saying this you picked him up this morning. I mean, I was like,

hell yeah. Dude, you have to respect it. I haven't checked it out, but is he like the poster child for men going their own way right now? A little bit,

yeah. I think he's, no, I'll tell you what, all of the hood pages that I follow are pretty pro Kanye West right now.

They're all saying like, yeah, dude, he's going to get her back. Pete don't understand. Well, he's the one. He's not fucking getting anybody back.

He's controlling the narrative at this point. He's crazy. I feel bad for him, too. Listen, you guys don't have your ear to the ground in the hoods like I do, right? I'm telling you what's going on in the hood. I watch hood clips. Hood clips TV or whatever it is. Hood pages thinks he's getting her back.

I mean, I don't know Pete Davidson at all, but I know people that know him. He seems like a fucking great guy. He helps his friends out. I've met him a couple times. He seems really nice. Yeah, fucking cool dude. What do you want, man? Fucking kid's fucking cool. I'll tell you what, the one thing that happened. Kanye's fucking crazy. Dude, first of all,

Kanye is what, like 40-something? Pete's in his 20s. I'm team Kanye. Do you guys know that guy, Dave, who posted those texts? Dave Sirius. Yeah, it's Kanye's boy. It's Pete's boy. Why did he post those texts? Dave Sirius. Dave Sirius? Yeah, it's Kanye's boy. It's Pete's boy. Why did he post those texts?

I think that's Pete was probably like... Oh, was I post those? They probably... Oh, they're best friends. Oh, okay. So there's no way he was doing that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. This guy's buying in the propaganda.

No, no, I was just wondering. I mean, I saw that because... Was it Pete actually was like, hey, can you post these for me? Yeah, they probably had enough. I mean, just think, he's been nothing but nice to the fucking guy. You know, he's like,

even in those texts, he's like, hey, man, you know, I've you know i've been there you're off your meds sure but when you're saying anything that you're saying knowing that you're gonna show it to everyone all of a sudden doesn't count that's like what the girls do i mean he does it too but that is what girls do where they go i mean fucking they'll message people knowing that they're gonna screenshot it and try to i don't think you did that that. I think that was all just genuine. Can you imagine you're, okay, you send it to him. You go, hey, I just sent this.

What do you think? And he goes, I'm going to fucking post this. And you go, what are you doing? And he goes, oh. My take of it was that it was after the fact. Yeah. Maybe it was. Yeah, it could have been after the fact.

That was my take of it. He doesn't need that publicity or anything like that. Pete doesn't want any of that fucking drama. I think they all like the drama. You think? Yeah. I don't know, man. I don't know. You know, okay, you don't go, oh, I don't like that. Pete doesn't want any of that fucking drama. I think they all like the drama. You think? I don't know, man. I don't know. Okay, you don't go,

oh, I don't like drama, and then you're exclusively kind of hanging out in the circles of Instagram following people and stuff like that. I know, but he doesn't have social media. Yeah, he doesn't. He's not posting social media.

If you were into the drama. Now he doesn't, yeah. I mean, dude, he hasn't even used. So does he have to get roped up into being on the Kardashian show now? Is that part of the deal? Probably. I mean...

Is he's got to be like on Keeping Up with the Kardashians and shit? I would assume so. I assume he's going to be on it. I don't know. I don't watch the program. I've never seen an episode of it, but... Yeah. I mean, what would you do if she was interested in you?

Fucking... He'd be happy. Make her every cheese dream I have. I mean, I think they've both done a pretty good job of not fighting back with the guy. The dude's obviously fucking crazy. He's off his fucking meds. He's sick. He's scarring his fucking kids.

He's fighting with a fucking kid in his 20s on social media. It's like, you're a grown man. You're a fucking billionaire. You own your own business. It's like, grow the fuck up, man. I'd say he's a pretty sick dude. Probably on his team i'm talking about kanye and i said or pro kanye over here these people that want you to believe the media narrative that kanye's crazy that just gives it the black man you want to take him down kanye's like probably an inch away from flying over russia

that was the move for a while because it meets putin no in america didn't like people that used to be the move for a while you go you fucking Seagal. Because it meets Putin. No, in America, I didn't like people. That used to be the move for a while. You go, okay, they seem to like me pretty fine over here, don't they? Yeah. Seagal did that. Sort of what Dennis Rodman

did with Kim Jong-il. That is the thing. Yeah, you go find a guy over there and you go, okay, well, this is what you treat me. I'll be cool here, yeah. Exactly. Actually, that was the billionaire thing

on the garbage topic. Apparently, this is something I do too. Me and Elon Musk were pretty similar in that way. Me, Kanye, Elon, just a couple of cool guys. But apparently, she was kind of going on saying that he basically has nothing. Yeah, yeah. Grimes saying that he has no things in his house. He lives in a trailer. He lives in a $40,000 trailer.

Who does? Elon Musk. Really? Really. He sold all his houses except the only home he still owns is gene wilder's house which he owns weird he bought gene wilder's house and his kids were going to school in gene wilder's house betty white's car yeah he legitimately was like i guess he loves like willie wonka so when gene wilder's house became available he bought it

because he's like i want to make sure that that Gene Wilder's house never gets sold or demolished or anything. So the only home he owns is Gene Wilder's house. And then he sold all of his mansions and stuff. And he just lives in a $40,000 tiny modular trailer by one of the SpaceX or whatever, just in the parking lot. I kind of get it, man. After you've had everything and you go like, I don't want to make decisions.

I also consider myself a minimalist. The problem is, and this is what happened with her, is you want to be that guy. It's a very, very fine, I'm a single guy kind of move, but as soon as you move in with a chick and you go, yeah, I'm a minimalist. I don't have anything. She goes, well, you do now.

Yeah, there's everything. Not only that but I sort of like to keep a bathroom with no stuff in it if you wouldn't mind she goes yeah I actually do mine

I didn't get that anyway what was he doing with that bird no offense Grimes yeah get out of here what are you nuts he's got eccentric taste

plus he's like I mean he's basically Anthony Mason he's just moving on from one woman to a next he's got like eight kids or something

yeah really yeah he's got tons of kids. She sort of got yelled at for it too because she goes, basically he lives below the poverty line. Kind of the same thing as a lot of these people.

Anytime they say anything like, oh, he's living like a poor person. Everyone goes, you fucking think he's poor? And then she sort of became public enemy of the internet for saying those comments. Well, because she was straight up like, hey, it's funny for you to be this 240 billionaire living like this.

But she's like, can I not live like this? Well, I choose to live like that because he said he ate peanut butter eight days in a row. So, man. She's like, I'm eating peanut butter sandwiches. Brian likes popcorn, too. A couple of cheese drinks. Well, what she's saying is he takes all of his money and he invests it back into going to Mars,

which there's no money coming in on this Mars stuff. He doesn't even have $40 to spare. He's got to knock that shit off, too. Stop with the fucking Mars. Do something down here. I guess what's the new plan? Peanut Butter Factory, maybe? Huh?

New Peanut Butter Factory? Combine chunky and creamy together in some way. That would be a huge move if one of the other billionaires, because Bezos says this, he goes this, and then like a big hedge fund billionaire comes out and he goes, I'm inventing a new type of peanut butter. Take that, Elon. Well, you're fucking socks off. That Mars thing is so stupid.

No one's going to Mars. They're not coming back if they go. I think that's the point, is you're not going to. I've listened to him talk about it. I mean, they're not coming back in a bad way. I'll tell you, you can send my ex-wife. You're not coming back if they go. I think that's the point. I've listened to him talk about it. They're not coming back in a bad way. I'll tell you. You can send my ex-wife. You're not making it.

He said, he goes, for people who go, he's like, it's not going to be good. No. It's going to be, like, you're going to be there, and it's going to be really hard living until you die. Awesome. And you're just doing it for the shtick. Well, I guess you're going to be in a five-pitch. To get that shtick.

Well, in a thousand years, you'll be Columbus of Mars. Yeah, it's a good bit, yeah. Well, that's the thing. It's a super long-term play. He's like, I want to try to set it up so... I mean, no one's going in fucking six months, you know what I mean? I could be. He wants to...

You definitely aren't going to later. You guys have been talking shit about him. I think once the planets align or whatever, the minimum, once the perfect window opens for the shortest route or whatever it still takes eight months to get there jesus they're not gonna make the eight months they're not surviving that plus they have no idea what's really there no well they're gonna find out i mean he's gonna go find out the hard way i mean in our lifetime elon musk will be on mars you think so yeah you're gonna be fucking sucking dicks think so? Yeah, you're going to be fucking sucking dicks. Oh, he's going.

You're going to be fucking more dicks for me. Hey, his loss, huh? Sucking Jeff Bezos' dick while me and Elon are fucking... Once he blew all his money and he can't make eight different fucking alimony payments

or whatever the fuck. One of those has got to be. He's just like, yeah. He's skipping him. You can't pay your debts on Mars. Pull a Dave Foley. No jurisdiction on Mars. Yeah, yeah.

Pull Dave Foley. That's on Mars. Yeah, yeah. Pull Dave Foley. That's the point. Come get me, bitch. Yeah, I don't know about that. Yeah, he goes, yeah, you owe money on, he goes, yeah, I guess check with my bank on Mars. Do you have the number for Mars? Oh, you don't?

What's the routing number for Gleek Glorp? Yeah, my Venmo's acting up. Sorry about that. Wi-Fi on Mars isn't great, so I definitely get it to you soon, though. I know I'm an idiot, all right? No. 100%. I say that,

especially with everything that I've been running my mouth about. I'm a complete moron. But couldn't that guy, couldn't both Bezos and him just fix so much shit here on Earth if they wanted to? Like what?

I don't know, like fucking childhood hunger in America. Couldn't they just wipe all that stuff out? I mean, that's the... He did say that. Sure, yeah. He did. Well, they did say...

Some guy called them out and he goes, send me the... Send me the plan on how to do it and I'll cut you the check. Yeah, he goes, send me the plan. He goes, I'll get you $10 billion or something like that. Just give me the plan of how you plan to do it. It was for what? Yeah, he bought something for like, I don't know, like $280 million or something. Like, oh, he just did that.

He goes, that money could end world hunger. And they basically called the charity out, right? And he goes, give me... Show me how it went. Show me how it is. I think their thing is like, I think they're thinking on a macro level, like a huger macro level that we don't think on.

I'm like, yeah, I'm going to give you $5 billion and you're going to spend it. And he'll be gone tomorrow. Yeah, and it's like... Well, it's the same thing. You go, hey, look... Bunch of dinners and stuff like that. Yeah, it's just like, you're going to do. And he'll be gone tomorrow. Yeah, and it's like... Well, it's the same thing. You go, hey, look... Bunch of dinners and stuff like that. Yeah, it's just like,

you're gonna do an ad campaign and... Make 10 million a year, you know, for running some child's... Do a micro level where you, you know, it's easy to say like, oh, you could end poverty by giving everyone a house. It's like, yeah,

and then a lot of those people will be out of that house and they'll sold the house. In six months. Whatever. I mean, it's not, you know, obviously those are macro as well, right? But yeah, he basically called out the charities. He was like was like i'll do it i'll do it in a heartbeat

show me how to do it all right fuck it let's go to march well i mean but also if you want to say that some of those problems and listen i'm forced into the position of shilling for elon right now because all you guys hate him but this guy likes to be the bad boy and a cheese dream where you go it's very if you really are a person that believes you know

global warming is going to kill the world or whatever everyone's dead in X amount of years if you're saying I'm going to be part of solving that

and essentially creating you know cars that don't need gas and you're going to create like a more sustainable world you are doing more to save the world than just giving

a bunch of your money to a charity so why not go like yo I'm spearheading this someone else do that 100% like why do I have to solve every problem

drop those Tesla prices get one of those god damn oligarchs to step the fuck up he's solving that we need to be on Mars problem yeah which is the problem he's solving that

he needs to be on Mars to get pussy problem you know I've been to Mars dude if people start going to Mars I'm going to lie and say I've been to Mars 100% you know what I mean like, I've been to Mars. Dude, if people start going to Mars, I'm going to lie and say I've been to Mars. Oh, 100%. You know what I mean? Like, yeah, I've been to Paris.

Yeah, he goes, you know what's even better than going to Mars? Just telling chicks you've been to Mars. Yeah, dude. No one's going to, you ain't got those flight records. It's not Epstein. Yeah, trying to get the flight logs from Mars. You're like, hey, you'll never find that information. They're in the black hole box.

That's awesome. No, I would be, that would be, I would, I don't think I'd go to Mars, but're like, hey, you'll never find that information. They're in the black hole box. That's awesome. I don't think I'd go to Mars, but if I could go and come back, I'd be down to go. I would definitely like that on my resume. What about just the trip to space? Would you do one of those? Would you go up there?

No, I think I'd want to go to Mars. Mars is a way bigger... I think big, yeah, for you that sounds fun just to go into space and back, but for me, I'm go to Mars. Go into space. Yeah, Mars is a way bigger. I mean, you're going to have to go to space first. I think big, yeah. For you, that sounds fun, just to go into space and back. But for me, I'm Mars. For you feeble-minded people that just want to go to space. If Elon Musk goes, you could tell the first joke on Mars. You could go down. I would definitely go in and I'd tell the joke.

Fine, you've got to bring six people. If I do, I'm going to bring your own. And they all have to buy tickets. Yeah, it's two drink minimum, $25 tickets, but you get eight minutes of stage time and there might be industry there. Joe Harari shows up. That's awesome.

If I do that, I would definitely tell the LA guy's joke, which is my favorite joke of all time. He goes, I told everyone this last week, but he goes uh starbucks there's all these names all these new names cappuccino frappuccino alpacino keep it up i'm me broke a chino and then all you hear is just the mars go a mars tumbleweed just tells you here's deep space There must be the gravity in here

What I want to know is When is one of those things Going to blow up When they put like celebrities On that On Basil's little thing That goes up One of those is going to eat it

I mean they've already Blown up a few It's just they weren't on them right Yeah But I mean one of them Is going to blow up With somebody on there Yeah

That's what happens in Succession Well we were talking about In where In Succession Succession It's like a TV show But basically Succession You know he heard in Succession. Well, we were talking about... In where? In Succession. Succession? It's like a TV show, but basically... Succession? You've heard of Succession, the TV show?

Yeah. You're saying it wrong. I can't say words. Succession. Succession. Succession. No, Succession... Yeah, like they want to secede from...

From their parents? That's from the Civil War. Yeah, that's the Civil War. Succession means to come after. Succession means to... To remove... Yeah, the show's about a bunch of people that want to secede from the family. I want to secede from this conversation.

What, is Brian Cox plane blow up or something like that? No, no, Macaulay Culkin's brother. What's his name? Culkin's character. It's fucked up that he's the most famous Culkin and he's still just Macaulay Culkin. Macaulay Culkin's brother. He's a good actor, though. You think he's the most famous Culkin?

Right now he is. At this point? Fuck yeah. He's had a better Culkin's brother. He's a good actor, though. You think he's the most famous Culkin? Right now, he is. At this point? Fuck, yeah. He's had a better... The most relevant. He's had a bigger body of work than his brother, sadly. I love McCauley Culkin, too. I don't think he's made more money.

Not box office. No way. Not box office. Come on. Come on. But you got Igby Goes Down. You got Scott Pilgrim. Yeah.

You got this show. This show's big. That's about it. Yeah, it's a pretty big show. I've never seen it, but... Secession. Secession. Secession. Seceding.

We were asking people who were the... What, that's how they kill somebody off? Is they get blown up? No, they... He did a... They did like a version of the Bezos thing where they're trying to send people to space and their rocket blows up immediately

and they kind of have to cover it up and they were... They put it out there when it was not ready and all that sort of stuff. Okay. It's kind of like the classic. Have any of the billionaires had a rocket blow up yet? With people on it?

No, Elon Musk has had a few blow up, but it's actually kind of the point. Not with people blow up, yeah. They're tested in boundaries. They get a data point from that. Yeah, of course. They probably get thousands of data points. That fucking reusable rockets, that shit's crazy.

Yeah, the craziest with the rockets is, I don't know if you see with Elon Musk, is how he plans to turn it into travel where you can go from like LA or New York to Tokyo in 90 minutes because you go up into the atmosphere and across and down. That's sick. Anywhere in the world in 90 minutes.

The Virgin Atlantic one is whack. That weird looking plane. That's where you just go kind of in the atmosphere. Yeah, get the fuck out of here with that British bullshit. What's that, like three hours? What do they call it? I don't know what he does. weird looking plane. That's where you just go kind of in the atmosphere. Yeah, get the fuck out of here with that British bullshit. Yeah. What's that like three hours or what do they call it? I don't know what he does.

It's like a weird looking glider. Remember the dude who did the skydive for Red Bull? For Red Bull? Yeah. Like you go as far up as he did. Yeah.

Damn. You're up there. You're up there but he skydived from that. That's crazy. Yeah, yeah, yeah. He jumped from that. Red Bull was doing

pretty cool stunts. Dude, I know. Red Bull's nuts. They went from that. Red Bull was doing pretty cool stunts. Dude, Red Bull's nuts. They went from like cardboard go-karts into a river. That was a good time. I watched that in Philly. The fluton. In the river you build your own

fucking hang glider type thing. Or like bike or whatever and you drive off this huge ledge and try to get flight. And we were all just fucked up watching from a window. Everybody just falls. And it was like the funnest time ever. Yeah, it was a good time.

Well, that's all David Blaine's new stunts right now are just he goes up into the atmosphere. He stinks anymore. I used to like, when that street magic dropped with Leo, he blew my fucking mind. That guy stinks now. Dude, his new stunts, you know. Watch me breathe heavy for four days.

Harrison Greenbaum's The Magicians, right? So he was telling some of the inside scoop. But, well, this is an inside scoop at this right? So he was telling some of the inside scoop. Well, this is an inside scoop at this point, but he basically said that that's not magic. He's like, those are just publicity stunts, and 90% of being a magician now is doing publicity stunts. So they come see your show where you do actually magic.

Yeah, that makes sense. It's like comics posting crowd work. It's comics posting crowd work. When David Blaine was in Haiti, that was fucking awesome. What did he do in Haiti? He was just doing tricks for people over there, and it was freaking them the fuck out. Oh, yeah, because they believe in all the voodoo stuff, too, right? Stealing their souls and shit. Yeah, yeah.

Pulling a queen of diamonds out of somebody's ass crack over there. They fucking lost it. They're running away from them and shit. It was great. I worked with a comedian. I opened for a comedian years ago outside of Philly. You mean a magician? Oh, yeah. I'm sorry. You worked with a comedian. I opened for a comedian years ago outside of Philly. You mean a magician? Oh, yeah.

I'm sorry. You know an actual comedian? I opened up for a magician. And it was, dude, we were like next to, we were like. Did he kill Harden, you with his street jokes? Oh, he was murdering. I was struggling so bad. A good magician will kill.

And he was, dude, and his closer was he had a grapefruit, which now I can easily just Google how he did it. But he had a grapefruit, and he would take a $100 bill from whoever in the crowd had one. They'd write their name across the front of it, and he would cut it up in the grapefruit, and it would be in there. David Blaine did that in Harrison Ford's place. Sure, whatever. I'm sure a lot of us—the guy was a road hack.

Probably like a trick you buy on a website. I mean, this guy wasn't cutting edge. We're connected to a roast beef restaurant. That's a big thing that they do is they get everyone's names and stuff when they go in and then they sort of incorporate it. Yeah, so he opens it up.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's a big part of like one of the tricks is the illusionist people. You think that they find out stuff about you, but it's like, no, they got all the names of everyone that's there and then went on your Facebook and like found stuff about them.

Oh, no, yeah. Like all the psychics and shit. The psychics, yeah. Like the John Edwards and stuff. Oh, that's all scams. Yeah, yeah, like all the psychics and shit. The psychics, yeah, like the John Edwards and stuff. Oh, that's all scams, yeah, yeah,

yeah. Yeah, they legitimately just, they go, do you have a neighbor, Mary? And it's like, yeah,

they just looked up your address and found out who lives next to you and all this other stuff. Was it her birthday recently? Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah,

yeah. But I was like, hey man, pretty good scam by the way. I was like, how did you do, I'm like, at the end of the,

it's the end of the weekend, we're like three shows done for the weekend, we're having a beer like at a table and I'm like, dude, I gotta ask, how the fuck do you do that grapefruit thing and he's like i can't tell you that i'm like that's obnoxious he goes what if you steal it i go where do you see that fitting in my act about living with my parents or whatever you know what i mean like hey fruit on them yeah you do weird yeah you do 28 minutes and you go every last two minutes uh i'm a magician i'm just gonna do some also like how can i do that at open mics you know i assume what you do 28 minutes and you go, all right, for the last two minutes, I'm going to have a grapefruit.

I'm just going to do some magic. Also, how can I do that at open mics? I assume what you do is you roll it up tight enough and then just jam it in the grapefruit. Yeah, I don't think they're growing them that way. Yeah, they figure it out somehow. Are you not going to tell us now? We know you don't. He never told me.

Yeah, right. See? You see me on stage tonight. I would just finish my beer and be like, all right, I'll see you tomorrow. Dude, that's exactly what happened I was like Alright we're done here I thought we were bonding

We're not friends Yeah yeah Fuck this I can't tell you that You're gonna make me go Google this really Yeah exactly You're gonna really make me

Go on YouTube right now Yeah yeah yeah I was like You fucking jerk off Your name is Steve the Magician Alright let's pull it back I drove you here dude I gotta drop you off

It's like And for your next magic act Get home by yourself here john i'm gonna make your car but your driver disappeared fucking dork yeah no there was the one guy that i was uh new in toronto and he used to tell me i would do how to get all the tricks a lot of them were fake string there's a no there's that like they have that invisible 90 of the tricks are string you can't see. It's not that difficult.

And then they have all this goop on it. Boys, we're going to take a quick break here to tell you about our fellas that we know and we love. The Butcher Box. The Butcher Box. So if you don't know already, if you haven't tried already, Butcher Box is a subscription service that sends you the highest quality of meat. Meat. Ladies and gentlemen.

Love meat. We love meat. Love meat. You know, they don't sell cheese dreams if you're some high-end snob like DP. They have wieners. They do have wieners, potentially. Potentially that you can make cheese dreams out of. Well, they get their meat sourced from partners with the highest quality standards.

No more searching through the grocery store for 100% grass-fed beef or free-range organic chicken or wild-caught seafood and more. They're sourcing decisions made holistically, keeping the farmer, the planet, the animal, and family in mind. These are some of the fellas

at the ButcherBox squad. So there's lots of meals you can make. DP, you said, what have you been doing? I mean, the big one that I made recently was they sent us the lobster tails and I made fucking lobster rolls, dog. Oh, you got involved with the lobster tails. Oh, hell yeah, dude.

Lobster tails, a little Kewpie mayo, some celery, some Old Bay. Did you cook it naked with an apron on? Yeah, and the apron has a big dick. It's like a big dick apron. Yeah, it's a big fun. But it has the flap. It's a fun.

It's fun, you can buy them. It's a fun lobster tail cooking. Yeah, the girls love them, the guys love them, the kids, not for you. But it has the flap. It's a fun. You open the flap. It's fun. You can buy them. It's a fun lobster tail cooking. The girls love them. The guys love them. The kids, not for them. But made some fucking lobster rolls. Were killer. And I also made a fucking roast, dude.

Really? Yeah. They sent us those fucking top sirloin end cap or whatever. And I made a roast and it was fantastic. And you know who liked the roast? The dog.

Not a figurative dog, but literally my dog. Loved the little piece. The dog was happy with it too. Oh my God. Loved the roast. No antibiotics, no hormones,

packed and shipped, frozen and fresh for your convenience so you can save time on your next grocery store trip. So customize your box or go with one of theirs. Either way,

you get exactly what you want. This is your chance to never have to shop for ground beef again. That's right. Butcher Box is giving new members free ground beef for life. Plus, you get $10 off with the coupon when you sign up at butcherbox.com slash theboyscast. Two pounds of ground beef free in every order for the life of your membership. Plus, the $10 off coupon.

Log into butcherbox.com slash TheBoyzCast and claim the deal. Next, we want to keep you healthy here at TheBoyzCast so you'll be a big strong man with athletic greens. If you're French, if you're a French boy, it's athletic verts. It's athletic vert. Athletique.

If you're French, it's athletic vert. Don't get it confused when you're going to the website though so i take it every day and i've been on it i haven't actually uh changed either it's one of those things a lot of times you get off them i actually don't get off them and a lot of times i won't take it in the morning and then i'll remember in like three or four and i go crank one it's sort of getting into my routine the way i just yeah i i do it with the coffee to be honest just yeah so if you want more energy, more gut health, better gut health, optimized immune system,

you hate taking pills, vitamins maybe, you want a supplement that actually tastes great, or you just wanted to see the hype was about, you hear Ricky Gervais and Tim Ferriss talking about it, and you want to get in shape. So what's this stuff? With one delicious scoop of Athletic Greens, you're absorbing 75 high-quality vitamins and minerals,

whole food source superfoods, probiotics, and adaptogens to start your day right. Special blend of ingredients supports your gut health, your nervous system, your immune system, your energy, recovery, focus, and aging. All the things so you can stay young forever young. Forever young. Forever young.

That was in the copy too. They said it. It was a bracket and it said, we wouldn't mind if you would give that a sing. You might get a copyright strike. But it's a demand of ours for you to sing that. We're happy to comply. So I bring the packs with me to travel.

And we just re-upped because we actually, me and Danny, blew through them because we've been crushing the greens. So it supports mental clarity and alertness. It has over 7,000 five-star ratings and reviews. Cheaper than getting all the different supplements yourself. So right now, it's time to reclaim your health and arm your immune system with convenient daily renutrition.

Especially heading into the flu and cold season. It's just one scoop in a cup of water every day. That's it. No need for a million different pills and supplements to look out for your health. To make it easy, Athletic Greens has given away a free one-year supply of immune-supporting vitamin D and five free travel packs with your first purchase. All you have to do is visit athleticgreens.com slash boyscast. Again, athleticgreens.com slash boyscast to take ownership of your health

and pick up the ultimate daily nutritional insurance We did it We got everyone to send us who they thought The trashiest politicians were And basically the unanimously was He didn't like that What was that? You didn't like what I said unanimously?

He's hearing what he wants to hear now What's going on? He had a problem with the way I said that It's like the old naggy wife He's at it he wants to hear now. What's going on with him? Unominously. Yeah, he had a problem with the way I said that. It's like the old naggy wife, you know what I mean? He goes, ugh, he's at it again, saying words wrong. Say it again. Microphone. He got a problem with that one now.

Say unanimous. Unanimously. Okay. That's fine? Yeah, he says it right. So he got a unanimous decision. Also, for a guy who makes a living talking, you really struggle with words. Secession.

What the fuck? It's like an old Civil War story. You really struggle with words. Secession. What the fuck? It's like an old Civil War story. You want to see that? There's chicks I'm dating. Me gaslighting them. I go, you don't know how to speak, actually. Write it right next to me. Special dictionaries printed out.

Go see right here. That's awesome. Bunch of fake webpages and shit. I got girls going to their next boyfriend with all these fake words. Me and my ex used to watch a session all the time. What? No, no, no. He's already told me.

Me and my boyfriend used to go to Brunch all the time. No, it's pronounced succession. And you go, I used to think that too, but he's correct. Common mistake. Believe it or not. A lot of people think that. I've also been corrected. If you look into it, it or not. A lot of people think that. I've also been

If you look into it, it's not the case. Yeah, I definitely have a few words that I say bad, but Rob Ford was the number one that everyone agreed

across the board. That was the Toronto mayor, right? The crack smoker. The crackhead. He passed away, right? Yeah. From unrelated,

he just died. He had cancer. Ah, it sucks. He had cancer, then he beat cancer, then he got cancer again. Damn. Dude liked to party.

I'll tell you really. I don't think that's... That's awesome. I don't... I mean, yeah, obviously it's trashy, but like... I don't view that as horrible. No. The guy's partying.

He wrapped up and partied. Because I know a lot about him. That's not like a choice. Was he a good mayor? He was fine. Dude, he would do these videos. He was very much like against the gravy train.

He, you know, about all the perks. Early Trump kind of talk. Early Trump stuff. You know, he's really like draining the swamp guy. Really? He used to do these videos

where he would go, they give you all these, if you're a politician, they give you all these free stuff, like a free pass to the zoo and free parking or whatever, right?

And then he has a whole drawer. You guys are really living it up up there. Down here we get Secret Service. You get to go to the zoo and free parking or whatever, right? And then he has a whole drawer. You guys are really living it up up there. Down here we get Secret Service. You get to go to the zoo half off, you and your family, eh? Yeah, pretty much. Yeah, exactly. All right, you can go to Matt Naise for only $2.

Free parking after four. But no SUVs, only compact cars. We got to stop all this reckless spending. Get to go to the zoo I would fucking hope he's the mayor Honestly though one of my favorite Stories about him was he was being Investigated by the Toronto police

For potentially the crack thing and then also Potentially like several murders What? Yeah yeah yeah they were like actually investigating him Because there was a bunch of murders that So there's a famous photo of him with these three Dudes that started off this whole fiasco of these three guys in front of a crack house,

and all three of them wound up dead. Whoa. And I believe only one of them, they found out who the killer is. So the Toronto police... That does make sense. ...were investigating the mayor of Toronto while he was the mayor

for all these things, right? Wow. Meaning he was getting cracks from these guys and didn't want anybody to know, so he had killed yeah anything but if you have a picture and stuff if you have a picture and three people end up dead in the picture and it's just you you're the common 100 and he was and the crack stuff so anyways so they were they had helicopters that were like uh surveilling him as while he was the mayor of toronto and one day they surveilled him

going to the liquor store and like on the way to work at nine in the morning. Goes to the liquor store. He gets a pint of vodka. Then he goes to his elementary school by himself, parks in the parking lot, walks into the woods, and just drinks it by himself. What? He's the mayor of the biggest city in Canada. That's the best one.

Biggest city in all of Canada. And fifth biggest city in North America. Goes, just pounds this thing in the woods chills for a bit and then just like hops in his SUV and just drives the city all damn

and they're like helicopters someone's just like yeah he's drinking in the woods I guess wasted this guy's wasted at the playground

that's awesome that's nuts yeah he was a fucking wild one holy shit he would actually go to the crack house himself yeah

there's a video there's a video can't send an aide to do that for you yeah the crack house himself? Yeah. There's a video. There's a video of him smoking crack. You can't send an aide to do that for you. Yeah, you can. What are you talking about? That's the whole point of being in power. Get some lackey to get your drugs. People were like, they saw him, they would see him doing coke.

He would be super drunk at like, there was one where he's at like a Jamaican restaurant. He likes speaking Jamaican. In Patois, and he's like blackout drunk. He's like, what up, man? Like all, it's insane. Oh my God. I like that. And then, well, this video, I? Like all, it's insane. Oh my God. I like that. And then while this video,

I see Basie, it took him three hours to cut through all his zoo cards and stuff and it was really anticlimactic. Give me a beef patty and a fat line, man. Yeah, he caught drinking in the parking lot. He went to the football game, like one of the Argos or something.

He was supposed to toss like the first foot and he tossed and fell into the summer oh yeah he would fall a lot he would fall that's great

walked into the camera but he was a press thing he walked into the camera but his best one they go they accused him of sexually assaulting

some girl or whatever being like saying rude things not sexually assaulted like verbally yeah he said he would eat her pussy or whatever

and he goes I would never say that. I got a wife and I got plenty to eat at home. Jesus. This guy plays by his own rules. And then he called her when he was drunk.

He used to say it to the camera. He goes, yeah, when I got caught in my drunken stupors, he calls it his drunken stupors. Love that. That's old school shit.

That is trashy, but it's like, you're all fucked up. You know what I mean? Like, that guy's not making those decisions logically

but isn't part and parcel to being trash a lot of times being an alcoholic like doesn't that go pretty hand in hand that was kind of his saving grace

was him admitting it too what are the drug laws up there oh yeah cracks no go cracks a big no no really yeah especially

if you're a politician but just no cracks no good weed was not one day fingers crossed crossed was not illegal at the time illegal or legal at the time it's legal now at the time it was not okay yeah he was breaking all sorts of rules that was one and the craziest thing too is they when he finally decided to ask like to admit it because they they caught him like dead to rights with this video and then uh they had asked him a million times do you have you smoked crack do you smoke crack and then he said he goes okay um he goes he goes reword the question and they go do you want to smoke crack no he goes ask me uh do you

smoke crack and there's something like that he's like no i don't he's like they're like have you ever and he's like yes like but i don't now because they were like do you smoke crack and he's like no he kept saying they go but he was like did you smoke crack in this moment i'm not smoking crack do you see a crack pipe in my hand you got any on you he goes ask me if i've ever smoked crack and they go okay have you ever smoked crack like whole press scrum and he goes yeah one time in a drunken stupor i smoked crack hey i like it honesty that's classic i like a good politician that's like trash garbage stuff like that that rises his way up through the ranks though yeah a little dirt on I like it honesty that's classic I like a good politician that's like has some real trash garbage

stuff like that that rises his way up through the ranks though yeah he's got a little dirt on him that's Philly must have had a bunch of those guys

no we did we did yeah there's still a lot of them who was it Dinkins or no Dinkins was

New York Dinkins was New York but one of them some mayor in the 80s he was the mayor of D.C. Mary Berry yes yeah Mary Berry in D.C. yeah he got some he was, he was the mayor of D.C. Mary Berry.

Yes. Yeah, Mary Berry in D.C. Yeah, he was famously got to vote. Yeah, he was the first one. They had the video of him with the prostitute. With the prostitute in the hotel room. And that's like when there was a full camcorder in a briefcase. It was in like a bush or something. That's what I'm, I mean, come on, what are you doing?

If you're not doing that, then you're in power. He did get reelected. He left for a while, came back, and got reelected. That's what that, Jesse Smollett not doing that and you're in power he did get reelected he left for a while came back and got reelected that's what that Jesse Smollett could use that underdog story hey I was all fucked up I'm back now baby

he has to admit it though I think if he wants to get back that's what I'm saying if he just admitted it he could come back and he could do a lot of things because he's so famous now yeah

you never admit it no I don't I don't think I would if I was this far in I think I'd take it to the grave either. I would be starting the Innocence Project. I'd be all in. So this happens to no one else ever.

You know what I mean? Start my own GoFundMe. Cuomo was probably the other one. Everyone would probably agree the Cuomo bros. Do you think those guys are... Because they're sort of high class, right? They're not charming in a sense. But Italians are just all trash, period.

Italians, yeah. Italians tend to be very trashy. I can't commit to that. The ninja turtles. I like Ford better than the Cuomos. Me too. The Cuomos aren't very endearing at all. They're like weasels.

That's the word. Yeah, they're weasels. Especially the brother. They're all weasels. The dad. Although, you know what? The Fords, their dad was... Especially the brother. They're all weasels. The dad. The dad was fucking... Although, you know what? The Fords, their dad was also a politician, not as high up as Mario, but he was also some big rich dude.

Yeah, Cuomo's dad was, I think, pretty openly racist and homophobic. Well, he basically came out now and he said, like Cuomo said, he's going to come back and he basically, he said it was cancel culture and he's doing like a whole tour right now basically saying cancel culture is the problem. So I think he might be getting into podcasting pretty soon he's gonna be on are you garbage in a couple of weeks i mean he did kind of dodge a bullet there a little bit because they were more focused on that than him greasing fucking 25 000 seniors or whatever right whatever he killed i mean they have his his uh the the girl whoever whoever his assistant was or whatever she is.

What was she called? I don't know. The lady. Four. Yeah. Lying bitch. They have her in an email basically saying like, yeah, we know about this thing with the senior citizens, but don't release this because we don't want anybody to know. Something like that.

That sort of, yeah. But I think he he wasn't it like it got pushed on her it got pushed down the chain of command rather than so you're saying it's good that he can

kind of now be five years later looking back he goes oh everyone got mad at me because of these false claims he definitely got off super easy

dude yeah he said like at the time he was to go yeah if old people have COVID just like don't leave them in the hospital

send them back to the old folks home where they again literally like the most likely to die and kill then he wrote a book like halfway through it like he knew what he was yeah it was like how i beat covid i remember being like i was like kind of pro him in the sense that at the time there was somebody coming out daily and you're like all right you're giving it seemed like he was shooting you straight a little bit he was gonna run for president win easy that was him and trump just they would go head to head on yeah and it was like pretty it was pretty good you were like all right like this guy at least seems like he's giving you a kind of clear cut and whatever and not like stir crazy and not not being like buying

into the fucking crazy media all this shit like he was like you're gonna get sick you'll be fine just keep fucking going type thing and then that book I was like dude what are you this is I'm on your side kind of and this is fucking insane part of me too was like how did you have time

to write a book aren't you not well they don't write it obviously I guess they don't write it at all there's someone just fucking you don't have anything to do with that

you got six mil for that boy yeah they have they were a lot of people you got six million dollars for that book and he won a what did he win an Emmy yeah he won an Emmy

for just like giving press conferences like daily giving press daily briefing on COVID for that. He was lying in the box. What did he want, an Emmy? Yeah, he wanted an Emmy. For just like giving press conferences? Like daily? Give him an Emmy for that? Press daily briefing on COVID. And then I think

they took it back. They took the Emmy away from him because he had to resign. All those organizations are drunk with power. Anytime anything happens, they always try to take their things back.

Yeah, do they actually come and get it from you? I think so. They send you like a prepackaged, prepostage. Yeah, prepostage envelope. Yeah you? I think so. They send you like a prepackaged, prepostage. Yeah, prepostage envelope.

Yeah, it's prepaid. Just drop it in a box here. Send your Emmy back to us. Oh, we're going to have to bill you. Oh yeah, probably send them an invoice

if you don't send it back. Yeah. What's an Emmy cost? It's got to be a couple hundred bucks. I think you have to pay for them too. That is the thing with all those things. What?

Yeah, I know people have won. Oscars. I mean, I think I've might have won something in my life. That is the thing with all those things. What? Yeah, yeah. I know people have won. Oscars. I mean, I think I might have won something in my life. You paid for the Oscar? I think. Get the fuck out of here.

100% you do, yes. Yeah. Yeah. They charge you for the Oscar. Well, that's why people say that they didn't even take it or whatever. Basically, you go and they give you a fake one. And then when you leave, they're like, give that back. Yeah, right when you walk off, you hand it.

There's only like two of them there. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. You walk out, well, it starts beeping's only like two of them there. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. You walk out, well, it starts beeping. Like cough medicine in a CVS. Yeah, it's that little sticker. Hold on there, Mr. Washington.

That magnetic sticker. Take it easy, Denzel. No, that was to take it back, and if you want one, you basically order it for like a couple grand or whatever. That's fucking lame. Fuck that.

Well, the guys are really serious about it, and that's how they get a little extra cheese from the lowlifes, too. If you won the best assistant sound engineer, then you're going to get one for your whole family. But once they do the Tuesday before, they're not televised. Will Smith probably paid. They might just gift his.

But if you're sound director number three, costume design's assistant, then one's the Emmy. They go, oh, yeah, five grand if you want one. And then they get four so they can show them off to their whole family. That makes sense. He basically said, Cuomo quoted the Bible several times in his new speech about cancel culture. And he says that it was political sharks who smelled

blood and exploded me. And he basically said that God has a plan for him. He's going full Italian religious guy now, right? He's blessing himself in the middle. Oh, my own. These fucking who wins? And my weakness. Isn't that a bit of a,

if you're going to be like a full out right wing cancel culture guy, you might as well just go, I'm Christian too. Sure. Yeah. Get the votes, baby. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

100%. Yeah, that's fucking yeah Usain's a pretty wild stuff and it's all he's all going full in on Bible or he opens up

like a spaghetti franchise as sort of another option come down to Cuomo's Cuomo brothers pizza yeah so that was one another one you'll eat it

whether you like it or not just eat the whole pizza Cormorant Brothers we don't take no for an answer we don't take dough for an answer that's pretty good

we got there we got there Domo Brothers spelled dough that's an option for them so they could be doing there could be a cancel culture podcast

on the blaze it could potentially be there you go Domo Brothers Chris got canned too brothers chris got canned too right oh yeah he got for helping him yeah for helping him and which i respect a little bit your brother what the fuck you're gonna of course you're gonna be like hey yeah we're hemmed up we're in a bad situation here i gotta fucking make i think i wouldn't be a rat like ryan long

fucking narcom probably my best friend and brother and his girlfriend yeah i guess you're mobbed up you watch a guy getting fucking nine guys are stomping on him he's getting pepper sprayed he goes call an ambulance you guys didn't see nothing more breadsticks at table three please well he said six aprons on this fucking guy yeah i mean you got to help out your brother i think he got into trouble because he was such a fucking, like, loud mouth about it. Like, he was going so hard the other way. It's like, dude, if you're doing something shady, shut the fuck up. Keep your fucking mouth shut.

You got to teach these idiots how to scumbag. Yeah, no kidding. Can't be on your fucking soapbox every night while you're fucking greasing people for your brother. Well, I don't know if you guys know about this one, but apparently Gandhi has some... Is Gandhi garbage? Some dirt on him? Is Gandhi garbage is the question. We ain't talking about his feet either. He never wore shoes.

Get this guy a pair of Adidas. What are we doing here? He's garbage because he didn't wear shoes. That's the reason. Come on, I'm eating here, Gandhi. He's got his feed up on the table During dinner Just like real

This guy a penny That was the whole thing Yeah yeah yeah Apparently Gandhi Never watched his hands Before meals Oh man He was a womanizer right

That's what they said Yeah big thing was He's a womanizer But the real garbage move They said And again This might not be the garbage In the way that you interpret it

What did they get him on 10% always. Did he wipe down the elliptical after he used it? What's he doing? He was apparently a hound. Marching a handicap spot?

Everybody hated him over at LA Fitness. Parked in a handicap, yeah. What was it? Yeah, yeah, it was he apparently would Venmo people money

and then he would cancel the request before he would cancel the request after the thing apparently Gandhi's wife

had pneumonia and then their whole thing was they go we don't use penicillin or anything like that and then basically

his wife died from the illness because they wouldn't take the thing and then he got the same thing and he said, I'll take the medicine. Yeah, everybody does that shit where it's like, you know,

you're holier than thou until the fucking rubber hits the road. He wouldn't let the wife take it. Let's hair storm the beach. And I was like, nah, this doesn't work out that way. Once the gonorrhea starts dripping, that prayer shit goes out the window. Sorry, Fadi, though.

Make good with the meds. Let's do it. He let the doctors do an appendix surgery on him while he let the wife die months before or whatever. They're all like that. It's the same thing with fucking Putin and all them. It's do as I say, not as I do. You think those guys in China

are living like the average person in China? No, they don't even use chopsticks. I saw that guy had a fork, motherfucker. If you talk to the high-ups in China, they go, yeah, buddy, we haven't been crazy. No, we eat rice with a spoon. Are you kidding? Is that a DiGiorno?

What the fuck? No, but they all do that fucking bullshit. Same thing with fucking ISIS and fucking all those guys. Every time we would advance on one of their positions, they would find like Coke and porn and fucking this and that. Especially like the oil Saudi Arabia. Yeah, they are.

They're partying. Yeah, they're full of shit. And they'll, yeah, very. There are people too. It's like, remember when we were all locked down? Then you find out Pelosi's having like fucking all night ragers

and shit like that in San Fran. They're handing out molly to everybody. They're all fucking painted up. The UK, they got busted for that. Oh, yeah. This war, by the way, there were so many people

who were like on the brink of getting kicked out of office in so much trouble. And then this war happened. No shit. And everybody's problems went away. Yeah, literally the second

that we started. Dude, all the, they were like Boris Johnson, they're like, hey, he's done. Well, he got caught at a party or something. He was having multiple parties telling people to stay home and then they were having these like rate they were legit having ragers

like where people were bringing it was fucking alcohol it was the christmas party yeah yeah yeah and then that just like trudeau and then all that shit just went away we're at downing street yeah yeah because they got caught on cat on tape of being like that's not a party don't call it a party it's a party type thing and they're'll be like, what do you, what? Someone got fucked reeling a mini fridge in. That's awesome. But also like, I'm sitting here holier than,

I would be doing the same shit. Are you kidding me? I would be executing everybody, every single one of my dissidents. Oh, yeah. Like just minor stuff too. Yeah, my enemies, like, I wouldn't be,

I would be very heavy handed if I was a dictator. I'd be such a jerk-off. Like, I would be the one where you know when they do the portrait of you and I'm five pounds heavier, I'm like, pfft. You are done. Five pounds lighter, also done. It's like, don't, you know. Yeah, don't make me think like I need this. Yeah, yeah, yeah, exactly.

Just make me feel good about who I am. Rolling around like Kim Jong-un, no one else can wear a leather jacket. I respect that move. It's insane. That's a nice fit on him, too. He's got a little short one that looks really tight, too. Yeah, he's got a hell of a fucking seamstress over there. Is that a thing, that no one else can wear leather jackets?

Yeah, because he lost all that weight, and he started rocking this full-length leather duster. Yeah, hanging out by the track with a cigarette. Dude, look, real sharp in it. Leaning on a fucking high rock. Yeah, and then made a decree that no one else can wear them. Dude, if I look... You've got to respect that. That's so funny, that guy.

Yeah, I'm bringing that to the parliament. He slips it in. He goes, all right, so we're going to raise taxes. We're going to put this school here, no leather jackets. I'm sorry, sir. What did you say? Dude, I tried telling him he can't wear black fucking denim jackets, and he still does. I try to rule.

Oh, yeah, you guys wear matching outfits. I literally be like, you have to ask me if you want to wear it. That's how I run AYG. I said, I get first crack at the live shows and on camera. I am Kim Jong-un of AYG. We're sitting here like the Ramones. It's funny. So you were wearing

before and then you sort of just showed up and you go I have one now yeah we have a big thing of everybody's

we're just blending he doesn't even hide it either he goes yeah I got to do what I can over here I'm not bringing

that to the set it's true he's only got take it as a compliment three articles of clothing too yeah I got to cover up here that's so yeah but he puts a different color underneath yeah you're going all black I go all black yeah Compliment. Three articles of clothing, too. Yeah. I got to cover up here.

Yeah, but he puts a different color underneath. Yeah, you're going all black. I go all black. Yeah, I like that little splash. But if I was in charge, I'd be the only one above him. Yeah, see, we each run. Only one chains out. Everyone else can wear platter. He said I can't wear watches.

He's claimed watches, but then we'll show up to something to record with the same exact outfit on. He's like, I know what you wear a watch. You don't have the vibes on the. We would do. Yeah, that's what I'm saying. I was out of a collocation for a couple of days. You and Jesse. And you'll see.

I don't get how Boris Johnson made it through with that haircut. That's insane to me that that guy's walking around. He does have a bit of a simple jack haircut. Yeah. How is that guy elected? That would have been my first question. He's an everyman. Like, dude, what's up with your fucking hair, bro? Dude, British people are hideous, by the way.

There's like 4% that are okay. Well, he got in on the Brexit thing, right? The Brexit thing ended up not happening, or it happened, and then they were like, we got to get rid of whoever was in charge because they fucked up. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

But his dude is whack. Yeah, he stinks. Yeah, they go from Hugh was in charge because he fucked up. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But his dude is whack. Yeah, he stinks. Yeah, they go from Hugh Grant to him really quick over there. Yeah, exactly. Not a lot of meat in the middle. No, his hair looks like, what are those things where you blow them and the fucking thing flies away? Bubbles?

No, no, no. Like the things. Oh, like a wishing willow or what are they called? Yeah, yeah. A daisy. They're daisies. A bit of a wispy cut. Wispy, yeah, whatever.

Like that's what his hair is. Are they daisies? No, they're not daisies. No, you wispy cut wispy yeah whatever like that's what his hair is are they daisies no they're not daisies high on the list here was Jeffrey Toobin obviously but the Toobin thing

there's more I don't know if you guys followed him before if you were into early Toobin the jerk off on Zoom guy oh the New York

the New York Times guy Jeffrey Toobin he was jerking off on the Zoom call. Oh, yeah. It's tough. It's not tough, apparently.

Apparently, you just get a one-week timeout. He got a timeout, but apparently, he also had a kid with one of his co-workers' daughters. Whoa. What? And this was 10 years ago, and it didn't really come out. So basically, Jeffrey Toobin, and he was trying to pay for an abortion't really come out so basically Jeffrey Toobin he was

and he was trying to pay for an abortion for the girl and she said no and then she had the kid or whatever and then you know five years later

he had his jerking off thing was she underage or was she of age I think she was like 20 you know what I mean damn that guy's getting fucking 20 year old ass

right and she was out there sort of making a scene being like just he's not gonna pay the child support and then she wanted him to do a DNA test and it was out there sort of making a scene being like, just he's not going to pay the child support and then she wanted him to do a DNA test

and it was the whole thing. He's a bit of a deadbeat, Toobin? A deadbeat Toobin, but the interesting part is he never, when the jerking off, I didn't ever heard about this

and I looked it up, there's tons of articles. I've never even heard of him. So the jerking off thing, well, you know, but when the jerking off thing came out. That was an accident, right?

He didn't, he wasn't trying to jerk off in front of his. No, he wanted, he thought his screen was off. Yeah, well, he was in a Zoom meeting, and he just thought his screen was disabled. And then he walks away,

and then he comes back butt-ass naked. And they're all like, what the fuck? And I guess he maybe turned his sound off so he couldn't hear them, and then he just starts rubbing one out. And they're just like... He still has his job. It's funny, too, because he goes...

His whole thing was like, oh, you know, technology. I didn't realize my thing was on. It's like, okay, but even if that's true, you're still jerking off to your co-worker. You're still whacking in the middle of a meeting. You can't wait till the meeting's done? That's crazy. Record the meeting and then you have the material.

He needs to jerk off live, though. That's what he needed the thing. I go phone right near my face in a secluded spot. Never use a laptop. No nudity, no jerking off ever? No. Strip down naked? What am I, a fucking playboy centerfold?

No, the thing is, he was clothed, and then he goes, excuse me, and then he leaves, but thinking his thing's disabled. And so it's an empty slot of just a chair, and then suddenly he comes back and he's just a naked guy. That would be the thing I would fire him for. Because he's stripped down naked to jerk off.

That's weird. You jerk off into your pants like a fucking gentleman. No, that's weird. What? He jerks off into his underwear. Stripping down naked. Into his underwear. Stop it.

He goes, it disappears. So you don't touch the dick. You just rub sort of over top. Can we circle back here? What do you say? It disappears? He thinks. This is my co-host, not me.

We've covered this a handful of times. He ejaculates into his underwear. You want me to fill these water bottles? I'm good. Thank you. And then just goes on his day under the guise of it disappears. Which it does. It dissipates into the fire.

So there's cum in your underwear. You just cum in your underwear and then go on about your day. Should I have a wet underwear for a bit and then a dress? Yeah, a couple minutes. It gets sticky all in your pews and stuff. Probably gets on your pants a little bit, too. Maybe a little bit seeps through, sure. I'm not doing that when I leave the house.

I'm laying on the couch. I'm watching. You're just like, I'm not getting up to get a tissue. I just. No, yeah, sure. I'm not doing that when I leave the house. I'm laying on the couch. You're just like, I'm not getting up to get a tissue. No, yeah, no. I'm not stripping down naked like a fucking freak show. I'd rather you strip down naked than to come in your own pants. Is that what you do? When you masturbate, you get completely naked and laid out?

Well, you don't have to get naked. Do you light candles and stuff like that? Well, it depends. I'm usually standing up looking at the window because I'm beside a school. I'm going on the offense is what I'm doing. You are very offensive. I'm sure you had a sc the window because I'm beside a school. I'm going on the offense is what I'm doing. You are very offensive. I'm sure you had a scumbag. Oh, yeah.

I'm sure you were a Ford and the Cuomos went wrong. I'll put the system on trial. That is crazy, though. Yeah, what do you mean? I mean, that's like using your shirt as a napkin. Which he also does. Oh, okay. Well, then.

You think he's drawing the line? You think he's drawing the line? Yeah, exactly. Right? I'm withdrawing my motion here I also sneeze into my shirt If I have to too I'll do that If you gotta sneeze

There's boogers on that shirt What you're supposed to do Is sneeze into your hand And wipe it on your sock That's actually the No that's actually That's the hot cloth On your sock

I've done that That's what you're supposed to do Sneeze into my hand What do you have to Take your shoe off then What Oh you mean the sock On the outside yeah no you don't take your yeah you go yeah you're at a party you just got your shoe off yeah just give me one second i'm

allergic to dogs no because that's discreet okay you just sort of you know you accidentally well you're supposed to sneeze you're supposed to cover your face and if something comes out on your hand you just kind of you know wipe it on your sock. Then is not jerking off into your underwear the ultimate sign of discretion? No, you're supposed to wipe that on someone else's sock. Also, a sneeze is impromptu. You know you're about to jerk off. Sometimes.

So it's like, hey, I can't get to a tissue when I'm sneezing, sure. You're sitting there, dude, you're on page nine of Pornhub. You could have got up and got a fucking tissue. I usually throw it in some old clothes. Like if I was going to put it in the boxes, I would now throw those boxes in the hangar. One hundred percent. And put new boxes on.

But when you jerk off, do you take your pants down? I don't jerk off, but hypothetically. Do you really not jerk off? No, of course. No fap? Five times a day, dude. He's a semen retainer. I'm all fap.

Semen retainer. It's coming out of his pores. Straight edge. No, never. That's what they used to call it, Danny, in college. The semen retainer it's coming out of his pores straight edge no never that's what they used to call danny in college the semen retainer i heard about you no that's no i agree that is not so i think that that seems like a three-on-one here that that's a weird thing to do what's crazy you're doing that or fucking getting completely naked but what how is it two options why why because this is what he does

to make an argument we're talking about the guy what's his name tuber what's his name well what he did is crazier than yeah you're walking around with cum on your pants

he's jerking off on a zoom call in front of his co-workers yeah my way it's our little scene yeah I agree with him yeah you and the dry cleaner I'll agree with you here

he should have stayed fully clothed adjusted the camera so you couldn't see he should have just waited 20 minutes like you see up here and then he could do his business.

Or just put it up where they just see your face. I'm about to sneeze. He's really into the meeting. I'm about to sneeze for six minutes. Yeah. Start smoking. Dab your face with your boxers. I thought the situation with that guy was

I thought the situation with that guy was is he had two screens going he was in a meeting and then he also had a little something going on like Pornhub or something like that

and didn't realize his camera was still on I think he was like alright meeting's done now let's get down to the real business I got you

I thought he paused it I thought he was like, I'll be right back. Oh, maybe. Because they're all watching him. Like, I've seen it. I know, but I don't think... And then he just shows up on screen naked.

There was another... He had popped something up on his screen so he didn't see the Zoom call. Oh, yeah, yeah. Oh, yeah, yeah. He didn't see it. He's like, oh, this is behind. But I thought he had thought

that he had muted himself. So he wasn't purposely jerking off in front of people. No, no, no. He wasn't purposely. No, definitely not purposely. That first interview back that he did like when he he got flamed the girl was like he has his job back now doesn't he yeah he's just back to business dude his co-worker who somebody was like yeah you know jeffrey got caught jerking off you know

he's like i'm like dude just cut this we all know what he did just say welcome back you served your time and you say you're sorry. Yeah. She was really rubbing his nose. Yeah, really bad. Like for 90 seconds. I think I remember this. Said masturbation 14 times. I mean, just think. They probably all hate each other over there.

It's probably cutthroat as shit. Right. You got those broads probably scheming and weaseling and backstabbing. Oh, yeah. Yeah, they fucking love that. Shit. We're going to take another quick break here to tell you about something very interesting. So, this is a new way to pay for healthcare.

And if you know, if you're looking for a way to pay for healthcare, hear this out. It's kind of a cool thing they got going. But basically how it works right now is your healthcare is no longer something that takes place between you and your doctor. Whether you know it or not, the government and big insurance companies stand in between you and quality care. So your health is being basically bought and sold to the highest bidder. And then politicians, hospitals, big pharma, health insurance companies make huge profits at the expense of your health. And lobbyists are fighting to make sure that you won't have competition and you won't have options. So crowd health, basically disruptive technology that puts your health care decisions back into your hand, saving you money and cutting out the middleman.

So it's not insurance, but they would describe it as it's what insurance should be. So it's a new way for paying for health care. Crowd health isn't insurance, and that's why it works. So there's no deductibles, networks, complicated exclusions or copays. See any doctor you want, you pay the first $500 and submit any bills from there. The CrowdHealth community takes care of the rest. CrowdHealth is a new way to pay for healthcare. No doctor networks, no huge premiums, and no high deductibles. No surprises. So it sounds like they've sort of figured out a new way to do this whole thing and they're putting the community back in

the community health care pay one low monthly total to fund your account which is less than 200 bucks a month for most people and 100 of your monthly contribution directly funds and reduces the health care cost of the community unlike insurance you're not limited by doctor networks so how does the crowd health lower your yearly cost costs? Up to 60% or less, as they say, which is pretty cool. Well, unlike insurance, it succeeds in keeping its members happy, not driving up the price. That's the business model. It helps new members shop for great care at a fair price, makes payments to doctors and members as quickly as possible, and negotiates on the community's behalf when unexpected bills arise. So it totally reverses the vicious incentives that got the healthcare system into the mess

that it's in in the first place. So pretty cool. If you're interested, check out the website. Stop paying for health insurance with your hard-earned dollars. Go to joincrowdhealth.com. Experience the freedom of health insurance. Right now, you get your first six months for just $99 a month. So that right there is almost 50%

off the normal price. And it's a lot less than the high deductible healthcare plan. So just go to joincrowdhealth.com and the promo code boyscast at sign up. Joincrowdhealth.com, promo code boyscast, check it out. And just for the record, it's not health insurance, but it's a different way of paying for healthcare and terms and conditions may apply. And one more thing we're going to tell you about is our pals, our Canadian pals over at Fume. If you're looking to quit smoking, you're tired, you know. Fucking quit the darts? Quit hacking the darts.

You were, you know, always fine when you were in high school standing by the thing. But it's over now. You're a grown up. You can't be smoking for the rest of your life. Maybe you're tired of walking into places smelling like a bag of ashtrays. Yeah, it's fucking gross. You're starting to look like a bag of ashtrays. You know, your chick's coming over.

She goes, what is this? Why? What is this? Get off the bed. You smell. It's too much. It's also fucking fucking expensive it's also effing ridiculously expensive expensive that's why you want to check out fume so it's a natural inhaler designed for better safer and more natural way to quit cigarettes it's no smoke no vape no nicotine replacement just run talking what I'm talking about.

What makes fume unique? Fume is the natural inhaler designed for better, safer, natural way to quit cigarettes. It's a no smoke, no vape, no nicotine replacement for the hand-to-mouth habit of smoking. I actually love the fumes.

And they're handcrafted wooden inhalers. And they use cores, which you put in the inhaler. And you can, it basically, because most of the time people smoke, especially people who vape. It's like it just becomes this, I mean, obviously it's a habit, but you just do it all day long. Yeah. So this actually, you still do it. It's kind of like not bad for you.

Yeah. And they have flavors like peppermint and conker with minty notes to stimulate menthol cigarettes and other flavors like lemon berry bliss for a sweeter experience all the flavors are 100 natural no harmful chemicals no artificial flavors and absolutely no nicotine they were launched in calgary so it is canadian boys if you want to support our motherland and they've helped 50 000 customers around the world quit smoking they're on a mission to get to a million by 2025 not only does fume help with quitting they also uh support beyond quitting with over a dozen chords for relaxation energy and more so just take the free

quiz to get started thousands of reviews so quitting is tough but fume can help they've got thousands of five-star reviews from smokers who have tried everything else and nothing worked get started. Thousands of reviews. So quitting is tough, but Fume can help. They've got thousands of five-star reviews from smokers who have tried everything else and nothing worked. I'm down with Fume. I like these guys. I didn't expect much when I tried it, but I'm a big fan now. Give it to a family member. Give it to a friend. You can use it on the plane, which is a huge factor for some people. So whether you're a smoker, extra smoker who struggles with cravings, fume is the perfect tool for you. Head to breathefume.com slash boyscast and use the promo code boyscast to save 10% off your entire order. 10% off your entire order when you head to breathefume.com slash boyscast and use the code boyscast.

Quit naturally with fume and save 10%. You know what? On the sexual thing, let me do this then. Because I was thinking of what's the... We go through these Reddits of what's the grimiest, probably the most garbage sexual fetish. And basically there was a foot fetish Reddit, right? And there was the whole thing.

And one of the comments was a guy being like, hey, does anyone have any tips how to get flip-flops involved into the bedroom? Weird. Is that not the ultimate, like, because flip-flops is sort of a trash thing in general. But flip-flops on a nice lady I'm alright with. Yeah.

Nice painted nails, maybe a little toe ring. Right, there is, but even still, like, if you went to a high-class place, you couldn't wear flip-flops. Like, that is a no toe ring. Right, there is, but even still, if you went to a high class place, you couldn't wear flip flops. That is a no. True, yeah. Well, on the beach, a classy hotel on the beach, flip flops are...

What's the exact question? The guy wants to know. Okay, so we're saying, we were like, classy hotel. You're like, well, if you're in Cuba and you go to the restaurant on the island. Sure, it's very specific. I mean, if you're in Denver and you're wearing flip flops, it's a tough look. Flip-flops are trash. He likes the girls wearing flip-flops, this guy. This guy wants to get flip-flops.

So there's a few different posts from this thing, but this one specifically, his thing was he's like, I want my girl to wear the flip-flops around all day, and then I want to try to get the flip-flop involved. Like, maybe she jerks them off with the two flops. I don't get that. I don't get, like, the salt. Like, I don't get the flip-flop involved. Like maybe you should jerk him off with the two flops. I don't get that. I don't get the saw. I don't get the smell. A clean foot's nice. It doesn't really do much for me,

but I go, oh, okay, it's something. A hot foot does something for me. The used foot all day. That's what I'm like. That's what I don't get. Well, that's what this guy said, and it was pretty gross. This next guy, he was like,

so my girlfriend, we've been together for a while And I was telling her About my foot fetish And she's supportive So it's good that She's supportive about it And he goes She's got really good

Foot hygiene And she doesn't wear Old socks Which he thinks is positive But he's not very happy About this And he says Recently I've been trying

To get her feet smell more So I've Feeding her onions and shit That's gross That's horrible dude And he goes Putting blue cheese in her socks he's mad yeah yeah she he basically like taking her old socks and putting them back beside her bed into a new pair being like oh just pop them out again that's because i wore those yesterday

go no you didn't so then he basically goes yesterday she wore old workout shoes home and her feet smelled for the last time for the first, and it was honestly the best, and I've been trying to get her to do it again. And basically, it was like his birthday, and he got her to wear like the... I don't get that. I'm so lucky I'm not wired with anything like that. I agree. You never get my girlfriend to do anything like that.

You couldn't get your chick to be like, hey, listen, I'm going to need the smelly feet. Get the fuck... I can't get her to fucking take the trash out. What are you, nuts? Isn't that crazy, though? Yeah. Well, don't act like you're a dreamboat. You got cum in your pants every day.

Fair enough. I mean, that's a tough thing to swallow. Why would she do anything for you? That's actually her fetish, by the way. I'm doing this for you, babe. Fat, smelly guy cumming in his undies. Yeah, because the foot fetish, you're just like, oh, I like a foot or whatever. And this one is like, it has to be fucking grimy.

It's got to be cheesy. Yeah, that's what I don't. I'm so happy I'm not wired that way. In the sense that there's something that you just got to do to get off. Yeah, you need that really special shit. Dudes who like armpits and stuff like that. Yeah, it's tough. Armpits is a tough one.

Those ones are so weird too. What are you into exactly? It's just nothing. I guess the thing is, and that's why if you look at cultures where let's say if it was completely forbidden for the girl to show her feet, then I could see why it's more like,

oh, foot. I bet you if you're Muslim or whatever, whatever you know that cheek that cheek comes out it's a big thing oh ankle yeah right exactly but the way you go okay but i want the cheek to smell now that's where you're losing me then this guy goes my housemate always leaves her boots at the door and i wish she would leave her socks in them so i could sniff it so this is what the fuck god creepo well the best you the funniest part about these reddits is that they these creeps all find themselves and then they and they all the guy'll post like you know and she won't leave her socks out and everyone's like that fucking bitch like you believe that she's not using them she's in her different reddit being like my socks keep going missing and I think my

roommate's stealing them. I know. I'm sure there's nightmare stories about guys and girls living together. Oh, 100%. Some fucking dude that's a creep. And there's girls that have no clue that they're getting their panty sniffed once a day. Yeah. Oh, yeah.

I'm not a panty sniffer either. I have my kinks, I guess, but yeah, nothing like that. I feel like that kind of stuff, I would be like, yeah, this might be hot. And then you do and you go, okay go okay this didn't what am I doing yeah there's things that like people I can't bet nothing's popping to mind but like things that are like you would see in like a movie like that's hot and then like as like a teenager

I would be like yeah no that's I'm a one and done on that that's not a thing for me I don't it's you know doesn't live up to the hype or whatever yeah well these guys find their they find their basically any weird thing you're into right now, you can have it read it. Well, I mean, dude,

think about it. If you had a weird thing in your head, you were like, yo, smelly, cheesy fucking feet, get me off. That's not something you're going to, at this day and age, you're obviously going to go

to the internet to find your support group. You're not just going to like ask your buddy like, hey. Well, you got to figure out how do I, every girl I'm ever with, how do I approach this?

Of course. Because, you know, you got to kind of bring it up every time being like, hey, so. You ideally, yeah, find one girl. You're like, how do I approach this? Of course. Because you got to kind of bring it up every time, being like, hey, so. You ideally, yeah, find one girl. You're like, how long do I wait before we're dating, before I bring this up? You want to split an appetizer and can I smell your cheesy feet? You got to order like a cheese board.

You go, oh, what do you think of this smell? You like this smelly cheese? You're more of a brie girl or you like Roquefort? What's the story? There was this famous dude in Philly, Uncle Eddie, he was just known as. Fast Eddie. No, Uncle Eddie, I think. Is he fast or uncle?

I think it was uncle, whatever, Eddie. He was known as Uncle Eddie. He became famous for, it was kind of like the DuPont son. He was the son of this fucking huge, wealthy family. And he lived in this high-rise down in, like, Rittenhouse Square, which is, like, you know, would be, like, the fucking nicest. The Memorial of the Colorado Nose, yeah. Yeah, they were ahead of their time. And he would pay neighborhood kids, like, kids that were, like, down on their luck or whatever to, like give me your underwear and whatever shit in your underwear shit in your underwear and give it to

me but the best thing real creepy how do you tell them oh this is for charity kind of thing no but this is how how street smart the fucking dirt bags in philly are just they're looking at this guy as an atm machine yeah dude they're like yeah man i bought a pair of socks six bucks i wore them today gave them to me gave me 500 bucks. Fucking idiot. Like, my cousin's boys were using them. You know people that did this. My cousin's boys did it. Yeah.

And I always thought it was, like, hearsay. I thought it was, like, folklore. But then as I got older, there's fucking hundreds of articles. Well, you started killing them or something like that. Something went south eventually. But for the longest time. Like, you show up with a fucking briefcase full of, like, shitty underwear. You got the goods.

Yeah. Show me the money. So the deal went bad. Someone got shot. Spin the briefcase around. Huh? You like that? God damn it.

That's the good stuff. What's, what'd you have, Mexican? Smell that shit coming down the street, huh? Yeah, that's what it is. Someone tried to give him a fake. Someone tried to give him fake pride. He was just putting or something. Put his fucking pinky in there.

He's like. This is Jell-O you lying sack of shit close the door you come to a business meeting with this bullshit

and insult me I love how he's taking it so serious how trashy Philly is I remember when I was a kid

and that was going around after they caught him parents would threaten their kids like Eddie will

come and get you like if you weren't a good kid Eddie's gonna come and get you take if you weren't a good kid yeah he's gonna come and get you that's so funny that you're taking down uncle eddie's too young for life kind of thing i for i forget how it is i believe he died he died i think he died yeah there's just like a known pedophile kicking around and your parents would be like

we'll let him rape you yeah you want uncle eddie to fuck you? Do your homework. Yeah, it's like Sam Hussein. Keep the status quo a little bit. You want to be fear-respected? What do you want? It's good shit. Fucking, oh, and then the last one of these was Sandra Bullock. Apparently, she does a new beauty treatment that uses stems from the foreskin of circumcised children. That's big. Stem cells.

Have you heard of this? Stem cells, yeah, yeah. Do you know about this? I've heard of the stem cell stuff, yeah. I've heard of this? Stem cells, yeah, yeah. Do you know about this? I've heard of the stem cell stuff, yeah. I've heard of this. She's all jacked up, though. Yeah, well, there's money to be made. That's why all the Jews are fucking circumcised.

That's all the Hollywood fucking people with their adrenochrome and shit. This is just the one below that. Yeah, it's like all that shit from- Anything that'll get rid of a wrinkle. Umbilical cords, too, are big. Well, yeah, teeth, too. That's another one. What do they do with teeth?

Well, this is actually a thing anybody can can do whereas if you ever have your wisdom teeth removed every person has stem cells in their wisdom teeth so you can actually tell your dentist and your dentist can like send them to some company and you can extract your own stem cells from your own and then what do you do with them uh it like regenerates like you know you can use it to like regenerate like if you have a bad knee or shit like regenerate like I don't know cartilage or whatever

too late for me I already gave mine away for free me too I didn't know about that so I got rid of mine Sandy Bullock's using your stem cells

I keep my wisdom teeth in a locker yeah along with the kids wisdom I mean if you're an actress oh man that'd be like you're a star

and you're just hanging you know like you get 2% less attractive and your career careers done i know but when they when they do get all cut up and you can tell it's even worse i know but like just ride it the fuck i agree just get different parts but it doesn't look worse on camera that's the difference so yeah it does like sandy bullock was just in that movie movie where she killed a guy in the house and she was on the run. Do you know what I'm talking about?

I don't know the one. It did really well. Everyone liked it. She was blindfolded on a boat? No, that's Bird Watcher or something. Yeah, that was some alien movie or something like that. We're pretty deep into talking about... I do love Sandy, by the way.

A procedure we don't know about A movie we can't name Foreskin, Aliens and Sandra Bullock Let's do it This is like fucking Mad Libs for idiots Welcome back to We're Not Sure Ladies and gentlemen You know what's his name and what's his face

What's that movie that came out in one of those years She just had a movie come out Welcome back to Let's Google It Either way you could tell she had plastic surgery doesn't look right yeah but here's the thing my argument is one there isn't as many roles for 70 year olds so the truth is like if you look 50 if you look 40 even though you're 60 even if you look weirder you still probably get more roles yeah and a lot of times on camera the weirdness

it'll clean up it'll clean up if you see them in real life you go this is a mess but on camera you go they look 15 years younger you probably kick enough

makeup on there yeah like all the girls in the Sex and the City reboot you're like what the fuck Jesus Christ right

they look terrible and fucking Nicole Kidman in that Lucille Ball thing. It's like, you know, who was in that? Oh, it was Javier Bordam and Nicole Kidman's robot. Like, she looks terrible. Did you see, I can't remember what her name is, but remember Single White Female?

The movie Fonda, right? Jane Fonda. Have you seen No, not Jane Fonda. God damn it. Damn it. I have to look this up. Move on from movies. Anyways. Bunch of cinephiles here. Sorry, Bridget Fonda. Bridget Fonda.

Dude, go look up a photo of her right now. It's un-fucking-real. She was smoking back in the day. So was Sean Young. She was smoking 10 years ago. She looks like you. Really? Yeah. Hotter? Yeah, smoking. No, no, honestly honestly i don't know i had to be drunk no no but i'm telling you like like it's crazy sorry i can't afford stem cells

danny i apologize this guy's no spring chicken himself i'm not saying i am she looks like you and it's gross point tag what's funny is i knew exactly what you're Well she was super hot No She used to be like really hot Like a dead dating Yeah Fully super offended He goes what the fuck Is that supposed to be Fucking invite me here

To this place Sit down with you guys And you insult me Saying I look like Bridget Fonda And what exactly would that be That I look like But there are people that

Don't do it She comes in her boxers And they look They look better Sure but there is that weird Like you were saying back with, there's that weird thing. Jamie Lee Curtis, there's a perfect example. She hasn't anything done.

I know, but she still looks good. But there's like that thing in Hollywood where it's like you work when you're 40, then you don't until you're like 70. Yeah, what's wrong with that, man? You gotta fucking roll. Well, that was the Sally Field or whatever. Exactly. She was like the love interest and went to, became the mom in the next movie.

But there's like a 20 year gap where you have to wait until you look like the mom. Exactly. Because it doesn't sell. You have to like you either have to look 40

or you have to look 70. There's not a good yeah there's no good roles for I mean men there's probably a little more 50 year old roles. But even then

they probably play 40 a lot. Yeah they do the same thing too. It's like Michael Keaton it's like he worked for a certain time disappeared for 20 years and then show you show back up you played it bad well yeah easy for you to say be like yeah just quit your job for 15 years quit your job and don't work and they're like well i don't have a staff of 15 people you gotta save a little bit sure but that's their age it's that people don't want to

go home that's what brady fucking spent a month and a half with his wife and he's getting back out there i don't know what i did i'm sorry i'll be back that's awesome gave that bullshit excuse my place is back on the field not with this broad busting my balls it's not picking the kids up from school i know that he's got a high maintenance broad too oh man he was the he did the got really famous and broke up with the old wife and got the hot new one. He got the supermodel. Why? She was pregnant, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, really?

Yeah, I think so, right? He went to the Simpsons restaurants and it said, your happiness and the new love. Yeah, I think it was Bridget Moynihan, wasn't it? Isn't that who he got pregnant? I don't remember the old one, but all I know is he upgraded, which is then- For sure. That's a high maintenance, the ex-supermodel. Brazilian, too, not even American. No, that's a high maintenance this ex-supermodel brazilian too

not even american no that's a high maintenance woman right but who cares if you're gone all the time yeah and if she goes oh i want this and this you go yeah yeah just go buy it whatever me and tom brady getting yelled at for fucking anything not emptying the dishwasher like also think he got thrown into regular guy life like that like he hasn't had it's not like he worked as a plumber came home and then retired right like he hasn't had, it's not like he worked as a plumber, came home, and then retired. Right. Like he's been working

every day for fucking 25 years. And he had the perfect excuse because she was probably like, hey, we're gonna do this and this and this. He goes, yeah, I would, but like once I retire.

I can't, I can't, I can't. Now he's like, you have to have a relationship and you're like, oh. Yeah, now she's like all that hundreds of things that we've been doing. We have to go to,

you know, we have to go to wine and painting night with the gal. Oh my God. Fucking put a gun in your mouth,, you know, we have to go to wine and painting night with the gal. Oh my God. Fucking put a gun in your mouth, dude. Yeah, like on a Monday night,

like Monday night before he's got to watch Aaron Rodgers at some bar. We can finally do that cooking show together. He's like, I can still cook. We can.

We'll do that cooking show together. Oh, it's also probably all like projects. Reality show. Yeah, like. Get me Bob Craft on the phone. She probably wants, she has so many wacky ideas

for what they're going to do with his fame now. Oh my God. For sure. You can start producing yeah he's taking pitches on independent movies someone bought his fucking last football yeah the five five hundred thousand for like 575 grand they bought his last touchdown football because they're like it's his last touchdown ever oh that sucks i don't feel bad for that guy. No. It's also like... No, no, no. If you have that kind of money...

I think everybody pictures some guy who got $500,000 together and was like, all right, this is everything. It's probably some billionaire. Yeah, for sure. It was like, remember when the... You're right.

We picture a guy that scraped together his retirement fund. You're like, all right, I'm going to do it. And then it's like... His wife comes up. I knew he was a loser, Ronnie. His wife yelling at him. And then it's like, get his wife comes. Oh, he was a loser. Ronnie. His wife yelling at him.

I told you the scheme wouldn't work. You fucking idiot. He's going to play again. You dumbass. Now he's got to figure out a way to like Nancy Kerrigan. Exactly. Kneecap him so he can't ever. I got to make sure he never throws a touchdown.

The Ronnie Treggio story. Now we got to kidnap Tom Brady. It's actually not a bad movie. I'm going to be honest with you right now. He's watching that first game. He's like, come on. Please don't throw a touchdown. Run the ball.

Run the ball. He can hold out every game all season. All right, man. We made it two games. They've been running a lot. He's washed. He's washed. Run the ball.

That's all right. Fuck. All right. We're going to do one more thing yeah um there was uh do you guys know

like how girls are me and Danny when we were on tour in Dallas there's this guy he was selling crystals and they're to make money crystals

and to me this is like the fucking kind of the stuff we're saying like the garbage buying lottery tickets is trash of course

what a good time yes but all like poor people things that are to make more money. Sure. Scraping a bunch of money together to buy Tom Brady's last ball. Exactly, right? But this girl, there's this money manifestation coach that people hire to sort out their lives. And basically, he gives this girl seven things, right?

So he goes, they had a seven-day plan. this girl's seven things, right? So he goes, they had a seven day plan. And the first one, he goes, day one, pour a glass of wine, light a candle and brood over the money that has caused you discomfort. So that's the first one. Day two, repeat money manifestations while jumping.

So by day two. I want to fucking hit this guy so bad. I hate this kind of shit. It's great, right? And you've got, so day two, you've got, you hire this person. First of all, you're already poor. You hire this guy that's going to make you rich. It's not cheap.

And then you're doing jumping jacks being like, I will be rich. You know, I will be making money. After a glass of wine? And you've had a glass of wine. Yeah, yeah. He wants to attract a women clientele, right? Hey, listen, start drinking so you think this works. Take your magic wand out.

Also, it said in this thing, they go, he was like a normal finance coach, but then he just switched over to be a spiritual coach and just sort of uses all the same tactics. But that's how he gets the girls to be sort of involved in the thing. And then he goes, so after he does the thing where they have to scream stuff, he goes, told me to move, jump around, talk to myself. He said, happy energy. I'm attracting more money

and more wealth into my life and I'm worthy of abundance. So that's sort of the, we always start talking about this but it's like, that's the most annoying thing to do when you're like working

a full-time job and your chick's like, you're like, hey, maybe you could get a job and she goes, I would but. I got the wine poured.

I've been doing my jumping jacks. I'm on day three. Four more days, we're going to be on easy. She goes, what do you think I'm doing? I'm manifesting. I've been doing my jumping jacks. I'm on day three. Four more days, we're going to be on easy. She goes, what do you think I'm doing? I'm manifesting. I gave this guy 20 grand. I'm almost there.

Do you know anyone that has any of these wacky money-making schemes? I guess they're doing comedies and wacky money-making schemes. Yeah, I mean, the four of us have profited from it. That is legitimately us with your chick being like, yeah, you guys have been with girls for a while. They're like, you need to get a job. You're like, I just bought four podcast mics. I'm like, babe, I'm a regular at the Village Lantern.

I just got a studio. Any day now. Someone's going to come in there and see me. I'm not barking anymore. Looking in the mirror, I'm worthy of fame. I'm worthy of laughs. It's so true. I remember my my girls my girls from germany so she moved here and i had we had to she was like all right listen like i'm gonna uproot my life and move here for you like how are you what are we gonna do and

at the time you heard of a podcast at the time we had a failed podcast and i was like i was she's like how much did you make like we had she's like we have to go over financials she's like how much did comedy bring you in last year it was like she wanted to go over financials yeah she's like

she's leaving her job she's leaving everything did you forge she's like what did you make last year from comedy two million dollars I mean ten bucks

from the grizzly two million dollars well they passed the bucket around can we get a tax rate on that bucket it was like twelve hundred bucks three meals count if I add them up yeah well we get a tax rate on that bucket? It was like $1,200. Do free meals count if I add them up?

Yeah. Well, I get a free drink every time I perform. That's about $7. Pulled pork, that's $8. I mean, $7.70 from the grizzly pear. Yeah, you're literally like putting... Truffle fries ain't cheap, babe. I know.

That's a high-class fry. Yeah, it was bad. So then, did you show her the financials? And I was just like, what did you think? How crazy. I was like, you just have to trust me. I'll play his lawyer, just walk in with a mustache on. That's just Foley.

The trick is up. I see you've been talking to my rich client. Oh, Mr. Moneybags. You're walking in with a mustache. Oh, shit. So you just went to Foley, you just got to trust me? I oh shit so you just went the full you just gotta trust me I was like you just I don't know how the fuck

we're gonna I was like well I'll figure it the fuck out and at that point you know we were so far in or whatever like I'm going this is what I'm there's no turning back now

like I've burnt the bridges behind me you hit your you hit your wagon to me or just yeah it's either like he's pitching her me real hard oh he's doing alright yeah I'm like he just got me real hard. Oh, he's doing all right. I'm like, he just got passed.

You know what I mean? He's doing more road work. You saw him on Manifest. What the hell? What more do you want? He just did the Jim Gaffigan show. He was hot dog vendor number two. Two years from now, he'll be number one.

He'll get me on the show. Yeah. I got a callback for a commercial, and you get money for that. But it was that, like you said, it is, comedians, you have to have that blind faith, I guess.

For anything, you need a little bit of delusion, but the delusion gets more unrealistic the older you get. That's all it is. Obviously, some 70-year-old guy being like, this is the year, baby, baby, baby. Yeah. Well, I mean, you're 46. I was, I mean, I was, you know, I was 30 when this, when we started RUGAR, I was 34 staring.

A balding 34-year-old staring down the barrel of fucking failure. When white, like, straight dudes is the worst. Oh, I was like, I'm out. I'm out. I'm out. I'm Oh, I was like, I'm out. I'm out. I'm out. I'm done. I was like, I'm done. I'm like, I'm not even one of the cool white guys now. You know what I mean?

I'm like, I'm chubby and I'm baldy. And my time to be the cool young white guy. He wasn't getting Kim K. Let's put it that way. Yeah, no. So then what happened? Because it sounds like you sold her the thing and she was like said whatever fuck it

she said fuck it she was like fuck it she goes I didn't know any of this I didn't know you had to go in front of the board well she now is our foreign investor

so I even doubled down and we took her exactly you even got her she goes this Foley getting passed thing can I get in on this

you pitched it so hard she's like can I get some action on this she's like I'll double it it does do a pretty good Southern accent. All right. I remember the email chains that would go around.

Send this to 10 people and your money will come to you. And you would do them? I wouldn't do them, no. He's still doing them. I sold them to 20. Hey, double my earnings. No, but I remember relatives sending them sending them Like hey make sure you send this That's a good trash man

Their messages on Facebook Was that what it was? Oh Everybody's mom Everybody's mom Have you ever opened Your spam folder? Oh it's crazy

It's wild what's going on In your spam folder Seriously just go Check it out I looked at it the other day It's called like Other messages or something No no no

On Gmail it's straight up Just spam But if you go look What's going on in there Yeah Crazy It's a whole nother economy It's called like other messages or something. No, no, no. On Gmail, it's straight up just spam. But if you go look what's going on in there, crazy. It's a whole other economy. It's fucking crazy. Okay, so that's day two. Day three, visualize what money can do for you.

So I guess you go like, probably get a purse. Probably ball in soon. Yeah, probably get a car. Day four, look at the money and voice your gratitude. So you have to voice Your gratitude For the money you do have Gratitude's big

With these sleaze balls You gotta feel gratitude Yeah If you're not grateful You're not You gotta open up And be grateful Get the fuck out of here

It really is Gratitude's a huge It's all intangible shit Like fucking If I'm gonna make money You give me the money If you can make money As much

Just you give me your money then And you make more There was much, just you give me your money then, and you make more. Gratitude's huge with this Leigh Ball community. Oh, you're fucking dirtbags. There's a kid I went to high school with that I think works as a sound editor, and he had, like, a pretty decent following on Instagram. Then all of a sudden one day I started getting messages from him like, hey, send me your cash app. I'm going to send you this.

I just made all this money in crypto and blah, blah, blah. And then I started looking on his page, and it's like these ads for crypto. So I'm just assuming he got hacked. You're calling your babe like we're rich. No, I assume he got hacked. And then the next day, it was him in a video pushing it. Oh, God.

He was on some new crypto Ponzi. Yeah. Because that actually happened to our friend like a couple weeks we've been asked to no but participate in our friend amish like a couple weeks that happened to his page and then but he was hacked but that's crazy yeah this i thought this guy was hacked for months and then he's in a video and it looks like a terrorist video like the resolution is so showing off camera with a gun, fucking plug coinbase.com. Yeah, like, fuck, I just blocked them out the door. Fucking great.

No, that is a big part of it where you have to essentially be grateful for, like, you have to look in your wallet and be like, that $10 is, you know. You're right, though. I'm grateful for this maxed out credit card. Day five, they want you to do a Pinterest board about money. So you have to open up a Pinterest account And kind of put See it's all Pinterest I don't even know what the fuck Pinterest is

It's like a vision board for the internet Yeah it's a vision But Day6 is probably my favorite one So they said Day6 Go on a treasure hunt Robobank No It's

Apply for a job Go back to school ITT Tech Computer programming Find a handgun With the serum filed off Slip and fall Yeah Fuck it Buy a neck brace Make it look real IT tech, computer programming. Find a handgun with the serum filed off. Slip and fall.

Buy a neck brace. Make it look real. Now, day six, we tell you a little secret that old people can't fight back. I would respect that list more of like, dude, this is your best chance to rob a fucking bank. This is your best chance for a slip and fall. Go to your grandmother's medicine cabinet. Find the pain pills. Go to the local high school. Become a gold digger.

Something. Do that. If you were a chick, that would be a way better one. Like, hey, visualize you finding a rich guy. That should just be the whole story. Here are the type of places rich guys hang out. Yeah. If I was a hot chick, I would do all of those things.

Body. I'd be all over that. I would never. I wouldn't. There would be no dignity at all. I would never work. Yeah. You'd be all over that. There would be no dignity at all. I would never work. Yeah, you'd be a prostitute. 100%. He acts like he's like coming the most, you know,

has the most dignity just as he comes in his pants. I would have no dignity as a woman. As a man, I am full of dignity. I'm glad you trade my regal status. Well, day six is go on a treasure hunt. He says visualize yourself finding coins and bills

this is literally like hippie gary v shit right here hippie gary v because gary v goes goes to garage sales this dude goes go just grab a metal detector he's basically saying go to the beach with a metal detector not even with a metal i would respect that gary v would be like go get a metal detector this guy's being like just go just think about where money would be and then just go kind of scrounge around get your crystal and it'll point you

you are right though because if someone's really poor and you're charging them any amount of money to give them advice that won't work it's even the

ripping off old people kind of thing you know the big thing now is magnet fishing have you seen that no oh I have actually they go giant

giant high power magnets you throw it in a body of water and just see what you get what do you get Magnet fishing. Have you seen that? No. Oh, I have, actually. They go to like a bridge. Giant high-power magnets. You throw it in a body of water and just see what you get. What do you get? Whatever. Whatever sticks to a magnet. They find guns and shit. Guns would be fun. Which is dangerous.

I would not want to find a fucking gun in a river. Also, those are guns used in crime. Yeah. Oh, they call the cops immediately. So if I'm the fucking Fratelli Brothers and I see fucking some dickhead on his YouTube page pulled out the fucking gun that I need. Fratelli brothers. Also like gold and shit.

Yeah, you're right. You know? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Gold and silver aren't that magnetic, right? So you're not even getting precious. You're not going to get like, you're not going to get that. It's not precious metals.

It's more of like, let's see, we'll get a bike seat or something. Although I guess with the price of commodities right now, maybe just if you get some fucking steel, that's more of a copper or some shit. That's it. Copper wire. That'd be what this guy should be telling

her where this copper wire is. Go to a new construction site. Cut the copper out of the walls. Get a Saul's all. $89.99 and take it right out. I'll respect that. Find a foreman that'll play ball. Yeah, respect the hustle. That's what you gotta do. I know a couple

guys that were into the copper and the construction site. Buddy, you're looking at one. Were you into that? Oh, yeah. Who would you sell it to? Oh, you'd go to Yeah, yeah. I know a couple guys that were into the copper and the construction site. Buddy, you're looking at one. Were you into that? Oh, yeah. Who would you sell it to? Oh, you'd go to the scrapyard. How would you get it? We would get,

we would get like a, We knew a guy, this kid's asking a lot of questions. Is he pausing right now? I need to verify that. For a snitch, I'd fucking keep his details to myself. I don't know what you're talking about.

Next question, your honor. Oh, no. If you get a job to clean something out. And there's extra copper kicking around. That's your copper now. They're usually not looking for that. We were authorized to go into this building because there was a lot of precious metals in there. Did we do it in the middle of the night?

Yeah, sure. We were authorized to be there. We were authorized. Somebody in the organization authorized us. I don't know if the highs high up. I know guys that went to jail for, I know a guy from where I grew up, went to multiple that went to jail,

but one guy went to jail for stealing copper wire, got out two months later, back in the fucking bin for stealing copper again. Dude, my childhood friend's great-great-grandfather started a scrap metal business with a horse and a cart and turned it into a multi-hundred-million-dollar business. Love that. That's the dream, yeah. I don't think my buddy's going to get that going.

That comes on day six, I think. Yeah, that's day seven. The horse in the cart. Yeah, that's day seven. Find someone who can sell you a donkey. Yeah, well, no, day seven is enchanted donkey. Take your magic beans. Oh, shit.

Day seven is rest, relaxation, and comfort. Yeah, you got to take the edge off. Yeah, after a treasure hunt, you got to relax a little bit. Get a little famished. You're the boyfriend who works seven days a week. You come home on day seven. She's just fucking feed up, drinking white wine. Babe.

You haven't done anything. I hunted treasure for us. I did find a Pokemon. I found a ball of tinfoil. It's fucking insane. And then you have to put the winds on. So she said she put on that she found a cheap camera and then she bought a camera.

So that cost her money. She couldn't even afford how cheap it was, but it was a deal. She couldn't afford not to get it. It was such a good deal. And then she said, yeah, she got it. Basically, she posted the things that she got a good deal on, like food.

She got a good deal on... So that's the money? It's just getting a good deal on Like food She got a good So that's the money Is just getting a good deal On something That's the payoff You get no actual cash No No no no

I mean I knew it wasn't coming She's being grateful You look at the bank account At the end of this week And you have less money Than you started with But you have this camera That you don't need

And the camera's not It's not like Hey this camera I can start a business Taking photos To generate money It's just I have a camera. Yeah.

I would let her do that, and then when it didn't work out, that camera was being used for one thing. It's called OnlyFans. Get those cheesy feet up in the air. I got that news to be full. She bought one of those bullshit, old-timey, useless, not even digital camera. You go plug that thing in. She goes, it doesn't plug in. I can't even stream with this you fucking dumb bro

what's the deal and when you find out how much it costs to develop that shit that film you're like what the fuck are you thinking

and the guy has to play ball where she goes oh I've been doing the gratefulness gratitations and then I because of

all of this stuff I managed to get this deal on a camera only spent $200 on it and the guy has to be like yeah this is good this is good stuff all good stuff

if you want to buy more stuff at deals and you have to pretend that her buying a camera was a good use of finances Jesus that's good stuff fucking

that's scumbag shit yeah real scumbag shit that guy should be beaten in town square yeah that's a dirt bag move yeah well

fellas this has been the boys cast with are you garbage fun fucking time this is our first four person deal too. Thank you, buddy.

Thanks for having us. Thank you for having us. Thank you for coming in. That was really good. We guys are the best. We always have such a fucking good time hanging out here. Always a good hang. But we have, yeah, this, I feel like we can do it.

We got the cameras set up. There wasn't any huge problems. I remember we had Column in here the first time we started having guests and it was just like a fucking mess from start to finish. But yeah, we're, so obviously the RU Garbage podcast, but you guys are going on tour too, right? Yeah, we're on tour. We're going to California the first week of April.

We're going to be in San Francisco, LA, and La Jolla. The La Jolla Comedy Store. And then also, I mean, we're in Pittsburgh, Buffalo, Detroit, Denver, Salt Lake City, Phoenix, all over the place. Add more dates. Check it the fuck out. Okay. I have a San Francisco question.

Is shitting in the streets garbage? And then if you're the person whose job it is who gets paid by the city to clean that up, what's more garbage? The shitting in the street or the job of cleaning up? Well, having a, first of all, a government job, good bennies. Good bennies. That's good. That's good.

Doesn't matter. Trash. Even if you have to clean up human excrement. That's a rarity, though. job, good bennies. Good bennies. That's good. That's good. Doesn't matter. Trash guy. Even if you have to clean up human excrement. That's a rarity, though. Yeah, that's true. It's a rarity. I know a guy that's a garbage man. No, no, no.

This isn't a garbage man. No, no, no. We're not saying garbage man here. Because San Francisco has people whose jobs is to straight up clean up human excrement. That's all they do? Crappy job. There's so much human shit in the streets there, as far as I understand. That's a bad job.

I'm not going to be honest. No, it's a sugar cup. I would try the seven-day money manifestation before I took that job. Yeah. But it's a job. Probably got good bennies, good days off. Okay, now shitting in the street? That's true.

I mean, what are we doing here? Yeah, that's a fucking... What are we doing here? All right, fuck yeah. Are You Garbage podcast. This has been the BoyzCast. Peace. Yeah.