The Boyscast with Ryan Long - Gwyneth Paltrow's Insane Vibrator Necklace, Musk VS Soros, & Old Women Being H0rny

Episode Date: May 19, 2023

Girls going out of control, wet lettuce men, not making dinner for your husband & DATING NANNIES! SUPPORT THE SPONSORS: Tryfum.com - Code BOYSCAST - 10% Off Athleticgreens.com/boyscast - Free 1 Year Of Vitamin D & 5 Free Travel Packs Buyraycon.com/ryanlong - Code RYANLONG - 15% Off RYAN ON TOUR: Tampa: June 2/3, New York - Sept 16 SUPPORT THE BOYSCAST: https://www.patreon.com/theboyscast http://ryanlongcomedy.com MERCH - ryanlongstore.com Ryan @ryanlongcomedy Danny @dannyjokes LEAVE US A FIVE STAR REVIEW! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

This week, a single dad has successfully started dating his nanny, and it's all over TikTok. But we just want to say, despite the temptation, folks, do not try this at home. You gotta lose the ball and chain before you pick up the mop and bucket. Goes without saying that Arnold Schwarzenegger's nasty nanny-smashing antics were catastrophically in determination of his marriage to a Kennedy. This was no Fran Drescher, ladies and gentlemen. Many great men have tried and not succeeded. I recall the great Ben Affleck had nanny fever in 2015 when he lost Jennifer Garner.

And believe me when I tell you, Benny Boy did not garner any sympathy from the Hollywood press. And we all know how that's turned out. Rob Lowe learned the lesson the hard way in 2008 when he did not stick the nanny smash landing, leading to claims that he groped and harassed that nanny. Lowe really flubbed that one big time, folks, and even though the case was eventually dismissed, it was a blunder for the ages. Comedian Robin Williams found out that taking his nanny for a trip to Pound Town was no laughing matter.

Looks like the funny man couldn't get away with the funny business. Actors Jude Law and Ethan Hawke suffered a similar fate, but at least Jude Law did not have to marry the nanny. And this is not only actor-specific, Ryan, because when Mick Jagger couldn't get no satisfaction with his wife, Cherry Hall, his honky-tonk nanny, Claire Houseman, stepped up to the plate. Great point, Danny. Bush singer Gavin Rosdale had a disastrous nanny tune-up session, and despite being a

vegetarian, he put it all on the line to pork his nanny, Mindy Min. Boy, are vegetarians losers. It can be attractive these days to see a woman cooking, but let me tell you the stats on this kind of move are not in your favor. Just ask Joe Piscopo. Be safe out there boys and do not try to play God, because when you do, you lose your only son. In a custody battle.

The boys. The boys' house. Collapse. The boys' house. The doors. Prepare yourselves for the boys' house. Me and Danny have teamed up with Mr. Beast for our new video that will be coming out. Mr. Beast helps a thousand male prisoners transition to get into women's prisons. Yes, I'm very excited about that.

Yeah, I've been practicing my carving skills. Thank you very much. Yeah. Now, couple quick announcements. You got to catch me on tour. I'm coming to Tampa Bay, San Diego, Salt Lake City, New York City, Tacoma, Kansas City, Omaha, Edmonton, Los Angeles, Irvine, San Jose, Phoenix, Toronto, Vancouver, and Denver are in the works. We're trying to get those happening. The other thing is, Discord has a new service where basically it's one of the things, a new part of our Discord, but it's basically show topics to post.

And then they actually show up in just all the articles. So when I click on it, it shows me literally just the articles, nothing else. So I've actually been super helpful for people to send those in there. Oh, hell yeah. Yeah, it's pretty solid. And if you want access to the Discord, sign up for the Patreon. Well, that's the other thing is because I want to say thank you to people because basically the Patreon went up by like 300 or 400. So right now, all the people that watch The Bugman

and everyone was pumped about it, it's like people really liked it. But more importantly, we're like 350 away. That's happening sooner than I thought. We're at 350 away from the next episode. We're forcing our hand, people. It's sort of a weird thing because we're telling people to sign up to watch it,

but they haven't seen the last one unless they sign up. But there's the social proof element where they go people are signing up because they're liking it and it's really good so people in the patreon go in the comments and tell these other chumps how good it was yeah go in the comments on youtube and be like you loot cheap losers yeah so you get a tv show and an extra episode i just got back there's a couple pretty big things but i was just gonna. I just got back. There's a couple of pretty big things, but I was just going to say, I just got back. I spent the week with JJ and Che in Austin. I must have been degenerate. It wasn't that crazy.

Austin is a- It's funny because if you ask JJ, he'll be like, it was the craziest week ever. What did you do? You go, we had to a restaurant to have food, but it's light out. Ate ribs. Did you go get some barbecue? I didn't even get barbecue. I was doing comedy mostly.

Sinful behavior. So I did like four shows both nights because I did like all the shows, all Friday, Saturday, I did both shows at the one room and then I did Bobby Kelly's shows both nights, right? Nice.

And it was like super fun hanging out with Bobby Kelly. He was sick. But Austin really is like you walk in on the streets and you're getting bumped around. It's college town for people that were done in college. That's 6th Street, right? It's like 6th Street.

Yeah, yeah. So I really felt like I was like, it is a bit macho a little bit. It's just like. Yeah. Yeah. It almost makes you feel old a little. It's kind of like the main street in Nashville. It's a Nashville vibe.

Yeah, exactly. Right. But so whatever. The thing was, the mothership was like very cool. It's like Nashville vibe. Yeah, exactly, right? So whatever. The thing was, the mothership was very cool. It's like the LA clubs, right? So it's very much like the comedy store. It's a little different than how the New York comedy clubs are. Just like the formatting. Yeah, it's like a theater, right?

Yeah, exactly. They're all like little small theaters. The other ones are pretty big, but it was sick. So it was pretty cool to go there and did every single show on Friday and Saturday that they had on the thing. They have four shows a night? Yeah.

Two in the big room, two in the small room. And the people are all very cool. Everyone had been talking it up, saying it's the best thing ever. And it was really cool. So I had a super fun time there. But that's not even so much why I'm bringing this up. So basically, on the way back, I don't think I told you this. No.

Ryan's Travel Adventures. It's pretty crazy. up so basically on the way back i don't think i told you this no but ryan's travel adventures it's pretty crazy so i was with uh me and jay were just going back right jay jay got like a cheaper flight if he left at like 3 35 a.m you know what i mean in a cargo hold with a bunch of chickens so and then me and jay went to breakfast and then halfway through breakfast i started like blacking out and then i was like i've tried to eat my food i couldn't eat to breakfast and then halfway through breakfast I started blacking out. Then I tried to eat my food and I couldn't eat my food. Then I started spinning

and I basically just had to go down. He was like, what's wrong? I was like, just give me a second. Then I basically, it felt like I just got off the fucking Gravitron. You got vertigo? I got vertigo. Really?

I got all day. I basically go, I have vertigo. There was a golfer. It was crazy. Jason Day had vertigo really i got all day so i basically go i have vertigo i've i there was a golfer it was crazy day had vertigo and it seems like absolute and it's a ear problem and you know i've had ear problems it's just all your nose and throw the whole back it's because you two fucking uploaded their music on your iphone and they sing that song vertigo yeah is that possibly definitely youtube related so yeah bond no thank you because i didn't so basically i i get up i try to go to the bathroom i was like i couldn't make it like the 15 feet and i go stop i felt like i was gonna puke and then i was like i tried i basically tried to walk sideways i thought that

would help so i was walking sideways through the airport i get to the the bathroom i immediately puke. And then I'm just sort of like standing there sweating buckets. So I'm in the thing. And then, you know, people are like, oh, you should go tell the airport security, which I know you never do. Because anytime you're at the airport, if you go to the hospital or the doctor there and you go have a problem, they go, oh, that's cool. You can't go on your flight now.

Because then they report it to the pilot. They go, we got a sick man here. And then the pilot's like, we don't want that loser on our flight. I had that with my ex-girlfriend once, and we were on there, and she was complaining about her ear. And I was like, well, let's just get on the plane and figure it out. And she's like, no, I got to talk to the guy. We go to the doctor.

He's like, okay, so what's wrong? She's got my ear. He goes, we got one. Wait, you can get a free doctor's visit if you go to the airport? Yes, you can go to the doctor. Seems like an America hack right there. I guess it is a bit of an America hack. Maybe they were.

I don't know. They didn't charge her. But what they did do. Well do well first of all the doctor doesn't do anything he just tells the pilot that you're sick so basically we got a bogey so we go to get on our thing and they go yeah the pilot said you can't come on because the nurse fucking rings it into the pilot and the pilot goes no way so then the only way to get on the thing was they go you need a doctor's note so they go we'll switch your flight you got a doctor's note so we go to get a doctor's note so we got to leave the got kicked off too or no no this is not this is the other one so we basically me and my ex we went to the we go to the doctor off of the reservation exit security the whole thing doctor says he won't

give you a note to fly paid the 500 bucks for a doctor whatever it was and then the doctor was like yeah you probably shouldn't fly in the next 24 hours so i'm not gonna give you the note so basically we go back to the airport the only thing we could do was just like buy a new ticket and not do this and pretend like you were fine yeah just be well not even no one asked right it's only this one pilot so the other people don't even know so basically the whole thing because she was like oh you know what let me go talk to the thing basically cost us an extra fucking 1500 bucks and 24 hours believe you me when i say i wasn't happy i wasn't there were you at that time i think it was uh mexico or something no it this is even worse it was a fucking connector so basically we were coming back

from honduras and we connected in like chicago or something wherever it was and we're in the airport in our two hours of connecting flight and she start so we get we don't even stay in there so basically we're stuck in this hellhole it's like planes trains and automobiles you want to talk about fight club you can call me flight club she was like flight club and fight club are very similar number one so that happened to

me I'm getting vertigo so I just said on the plane I'm about to puke the entire time that sounds like that's like honestly one of my like

huge fears is that it's a nightmare and I didn't get it didn't go away I get off the plane I'm back for maybe two seconds after I was in the plane I

might be fine and then I almost like fell over again yeah I'm trying to fucking eat stuff I feel like if you went into a if you went into a gravitron like type ride but that was going the opposite direction of your spins you have to you reverse it some people were giving me all sorts of mental tips they go like what you do is you close your eyes and then you turn your head one way hold it for 40 seconds you turn your way and i do all this

thing for five minutes and i go did it help i go not even a little bit yeah so it's all a big scam but on top of that that is the least of our worries because there is you want to know who really has worries is ukraine and you should be personally they have vertigo too they're fucking gonna does zelinski have vertigo zelinski's gonna have more than vertigo because russia recruited steven seagal to teach martial arts to the soldiers. Oh, no. I guess the war's over, then. Because we did the intro.

War over! I can't stop doing the voice. Russia recruits Steven Seagal to teach martial arts to its soldiers. I actually always wondered, if you go to school for broadcasting, are they like, here's, like, listen to some Joe Buck?

This is the voice that you want to do i think what happens probably is that you just see everyone else doing it and you just kind of like who's like was it walter no it's like the chinese experiment or whatever where they have uh everyone has to stand when the bell rings and then eventually no one knows why they're doing it they just do it yeah i always wondered like where where did that come from or is that just that's the ideal? Well, people used to talk a bit like that back in the day. So it's sort of a throwback.

So apparently, Steven Zagal is literally going over to Russia. Because he's a citizen of Russia, right? He's really tight with Putin, right? And he's just teaching. Basically, can you imagine if you were the Ukraine army? You got all your fresh American bazookas or whatever they give them, right? And you're sitting there. And then you see 10,000 Russian troops just coving over the hill like this. What is he teaching them?

Hikido? Hikido. Which one is that? Hikido? You're going to find out. Is Hikido the one with the wooden sticks? Dude, Zelensky's going to go over. He's going to be doing a national press conference.

And he goes, because this is what's going to happen. Steven Seagal, the troops aren't going to be doing enough. And then Steven Seagal is going to put himself in. You're just going to see him rolling down the hill, taking out soldiers. And then he gets up and then he just goes, job done. And then Zelensky's going to come on. He's going to have bird, like Tweety birds flying over his head. He's going to have a big, you know, bandage over his head, crutches. And he goes, no more. more you know you can have the don bass you can you have it all whatever you need you know that if you google i just googled the keto biden's you know we i agree we shouldn't have given that money to joe biden's son we'll give you more money just take it uh steven seagal is the fourth picture that comes up when you google a keto like the why is he number four he should be number one but it's a martial art it's like he's like there's no people it's the guy who popularized oh i didn't know that he's the guy who made it you wouldn't even have never you wouldn't even have heard of it if it wasn't for the fucking goat so i don't love more students at all i don't know what side you are on this right you came to russia you're sort of you know you flip flop back and forth you go whoever you know you go whoever supports israel i got loyalties yo here's the

best part though so this is what america needs to do i don't know if you can guess but the only anecdote is john claude van damme needs to train the american soldiers thing wesley snipes no because they're the of the I would say that the, what do you call it? Nemesis. Oh, they were nemesis. They were like Yeah, so then you basically have the Russian army just going and then the American army is all

doing splits everywhere. I mean, in a fight right now, I think Jean-Claude Van Damme would destroy Steven Seagal. Destroy him? He'd squash him like a bug. He's the size of Steven Seagal's left finger. And I still think I stand by him. You're cooked out of your mind, Cal.

JVD takes that down. He's just so agile. He'd be running around him. He'd be behind him. Yeah, he'd be running around him like a friggin' mouse and then Steven Seagal would squish on him. Yeah, this is David versus Goliath. Well, I don't know what you think about the Bible,

but how that actually plays out is Goliath tunes up David. Those are lies. Fake news. Oh, yeah. There's ever been Andre the Giant versus one of Doink the Clown's midgets, and that's what happened? Doink the Clown's takes it? I think Doink the Clown's midgets would take that one.

Pal. Pal. You're out of here. Bud? I got to be honest with you. What do you think his hair dye expense is? Who? Seagal. Seagal?

It's like a jet black. You're off on that. He thinks about it. His hair turns color. He looks at his hair follicles in the mirror and he goes... And it goes loud and clear. Sorry. Sorry, sir.

If you want to be budgets, you should be worrying about his food budget. His borscht budget over in Russia. That's the only problem with getting Seagal. He's a big eater. So I was thinking that that's crazy. Also, balls on Seagal, though, going like full in, like I'm joining the Russian military, essentially. Pretty crazy, yeah yeah considering what's

going on like at what point is are dead he must get some dirty looks when he comes back to america now oh yeah a bit of a traitor well but i guess he's what is this it's his buddy they feel like they turned like he's like america turned their back on me when they stopped letting like having my movies make a hundred million dollars i think that is what it goes like literally like yeah america turned its back you took away under siege you're gonna be yeah like i was just giving you literally like the greatest movie of all time every single time i made a movie yeah and then you just like just disrespected me i agree that is russia when i make the greatest movie of all time it is the greatest movie of all time and they respect it yeah that's that's what this soon he's like that's the deal he made he goes i'll

train but like you know how you're putting people in jail for saying the wrong thing they're putting people in jail to say that like you know his 19th b movie that year was like someone goes like a critic so he's because critics are disappearing yeah critics are disappearing and they're not even like saying it was a piece of shit they're just like yeah it was all right that wasn't that great i I don't know. Just a little fat. Some continuity issues and just disappeared. That's what happens. You're just poisoning your underwear. You're gone.

Yeah, yeah. You're just like, that's a new Seagal movie. Wasn't that great? You just go. Not him. With him, he just falls through the ceiling. He's trying to spy. Huffington Post had a really good one.

Okay, ready? There's a big Trump gossip coming from Huffington Post. Ooh, I like some hot gossip. We're not going to go into the article, but I just got to tell you the headline. Okay, ready? Big Trump gossip coming from Huffington Post. Ooh, I like some hot gossip. We're not going to go into the article, but I just got to tell you the headline. Okay, so listen. This is what Huffington Post did. Big drop. They go, a tape might exist of Trump doing something in an elevator, though

exactly where that somewhere is and what that something might be, no one in media can say. That's because no one in media seems to have the tape or is even confident it exists. Wow, that's some hard-hitting journalism right there. That's a kill shot.

Did they get a Pulitzer for that one? That would be like, you should find who wrote that. You should be like legitimately that person. I'm looking at their tweet. Like we should mail that person a fake Pulitzer Prize. Like we should literally like prank them and call them up and be like, hey, this is the Pulitzer Prize Society. How good is that?

Someone's done that to me. They said Vice is down bad. Or not helping to Buzz is down bad right now. That seems like a legit... Running that's crazy. That's like everybody saying AI is going to make headlines. That's like a bad AI headline that nobody checked and just released. The AI headlines at BuzzFeed apparently are outperforming the people headlines.

Isn't that funny? Well, they're all fucking, yeah. I mean, that I believe. So they go, there's a tape that might exist that says Trump's doing something really, really bad on that tape. However, we don't know what's on that tape and no one even knows if the tape exists do you have like honestly the only way you could publish that is if you have the tape and there's some reason why you're not allowed to release it well they oh

vertigo's coming back oh well they said they are and actually no it's not it sort of came back a little bit the second day then it flight flighted. Yeah, that sucks. So I'm back to good. That stinks. I actually got it. I took a Zin for the first time the other day. How'd you like that? I almost threw up.

Body couldn't handle it. I literally almost puked. Really? Yeah. Interesting. Well, it was the one, the extra strength ones. I haven't had any nicotine for like 20 years. You saw Tucker Carlson take it.

Literally, it was from that. Tucker got you on it? No, no, no. Well, he said that, and then on that podcast, where he's like, it's the greatest thing said, I could be a Tucker guy. It was from that. Tucker got you on it? No, no, no. Well, he said that. And then on that podcast, he was like, it's the greatest thing ever. And then I was hanging out with Lev. And Lev's doing them now. And I go, I'm like, all right.

I'll just try one. And then I put it in. I was like, whoa. Did you do the man's in or the girl's in? The strong, the sixes. There's your problem. You need the lady's in. And someone said you're supposed to spit them?

No, you don't spit them out. No, I wasn't. No, that's correct. Yeah, yeah. I did it. And then at one point, I was in the bathroom. And someone said you're supposed to spit them? No, you don't spit them out. No, I wasn't. No, that's correct. Yeah, yeah, I did it. And then at one point I was in the bathroom and I was like... I mean, it's the only nicotine I've ingested in 20 years. And it was like... Yeah.

And then I was... Yeah. There's your problem. I'm retired. Ladyboy Zins. I'm retired from Zins. So there was... I got a whole flock of segment that I'm calling the horny women segment.

But before that, so Kanye West is back in the news, speaking of Jews, right? Yeah, my people. Kanye West has a new, so Kanye West basically has a new fashion line coming out. And if you've seen it, it's just socks for shoes. Yep.

So Kanye West, What is that? After all this stuff he basically came out and he was like you know what forget all the politics stuff i'm gonna go back to my true love fashion they just dropped socks for shoes is there any way that he's just because he's obviously a little loopy did he forget to put shoes on and then could they just went with and then they go kanye what's going on with you you're not wearing shoes and he's like no these are my shoes.

It's socks and shoes. Oh, yeah. That's what he goes. Buddy, is your fly undone? And you go, no, this is the fly undone pants. This is, yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, these don't even have them. Oh, you don't? Oh, my God.

You still think people put their flies up? Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's crazy that you think that. That was the first guy with droopy pants. How about this? Or the first guy that ate breakfast for dinner. Breakfast for dinner guy. Breakfast for dinner guy.

Are you confused about what time it is? What about this for a fashion line? How about this? An undershirt that's an overshirt. So essentially, you put your undershirt

over top of your shirt. I like that. Boxer short shorts. So you just wear boxer shorts, but they're actually shorts? Yeah. Mitt, mitt.

You got one? Go ahead. Mittens for shoes, shoes for mittens. It's really revolutionary. But did they fit? The mittens are like designed because obviously a hand and a foot are kind of a bit of a different design. That's true. So that's probably...

Oven mitt shoes. i like oven mitt shoes but they still but they only have the single thumb those are kind of like the yeah those like those toe shoes or whatever okay kind of like okay you didn't like that one coat that's a shirt i like coat so you someone like it's just a t-shirt and someone says uh that's all right bra that's a top yeah seinfeld did that but okay hand shoes that's another one just sort of a play it's a play on it's a play on there's only so many permutations of things you can kind of rearrange bike with no wheels we're about to we're literally about to like come up with those pants that like zip away the bottoms not tearaways the ones where their pants but then they zip away into shorts saran wrap

underwear so you wrap on your underwear so basically instead of having to change your underwear it's a big roll of saran wrap and then you can basically saran wrap on your underwear every day and then you explode you throw it out afterwards every day have you been watching fetish videos you basically buy a big well no one sees them right it's underneath yeah yeah that's still fetish material right there well that you were thinking that i mean if you listen if you want to use my product for that you're well more than welcome to i mean you know what speaking of saran wrap though saran wrap uh like like toques and and like hats saran wrap hat because that actually will keep bottle in the heat right because that's like they don't breathe saran wrap do rag yeah so a do-rag, but it's a saran wrap sort of thing.

And it's the sticky thing, so you basically just wrap up your head and that's your do-rag. Yeah, exactly. Or saran wrap turban. Saran wrap something. Saran wrap turban would be a good one because a lot of people want to know

what's going on under there. That's kind of like one of those watches that have the glass so you can see through. I'm listening. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I like saran wrap. Saran wrap turban actually might be a thing because that'll cure xenophobia.

How about sunglasses that are actually a bra? I hate fashion. It's so fucking dumb. I'm actually, now that we say it, I do think he forgot to put his shoes on. How about moon gloves? Like, they're moon shoes on your hands. It's not bad.

He must... Kanye literally must just like be by himself sometimes and just like... Denture earphones. Denture earphones? He must just put a shoe on his head and just look at the mirror and be like, is this something?

He's like a big is this something guy. Is this... He's like, is this something? is this he was like is this something you think we have anything here he just taped a water bottle to his head and we go do you think we have something here what about this is that fashion that was really good though they had a in in one of the fashion models you know how they have the fat fashion models they had one fashion model there was one you know how they have the fat fashion models? They had one fashion model. There was one arm.

And it was literally the shirt was like this. It was Hank's dad from King of the Hill. He was modeling the shirt. And he was just like this. And he was just like, and he was kind of looking cool too. You know what I mean? Like, you know, modeling the thing. But he was just like, well, you're like, you don't really know how it looks. I mean, I that's kind of like punk ish to have like a like a amputee okay but you've not when you're trying to look at what

it looks like yeah okay so if i was trying to do my saran wrap turban would i have a guy with no head you got one of the guy who like just is missing like you ever see someone who's just like yeah yeah that's not the guy i would have to fucking your hat model if you want to have the no arm guy get him to do the pants like it's pretty simple stuff here that is a good do i have to be the one to say that is a good point not trying to tell you how to do your job but if you want an art no arm guy you make him do the pants they're fucking running out of ideas over in the fashion world huh they are really running out of ideas all like all the trendy people that just dress everybody just when i was in high school like they're just they're they they did go around

to that yeah i was at some like bar recently and some guy was was dressed out of like a straight up like 99 movie like can't hardly wait or something like sure the whole outfit bleach blonde short hair like you look like uh mark he looked like a mark math. Yeah, exactly. So the girls have been horny this week, and there was a lot of different things. So the first thing was, and this isn't even on the list, but there was like six different teachers last week that were arrested for smashing dudes. So I don't know what it is.

Maybe 14-year-old dudes have just gotten really good at getting pussy from the internet. Because I feel like, you know, I guess one way to say it is that the teachers are getting more, you know, whatever, like more horny, but it's also possible that these 14 year olds just like they're watching,

you know, Andrew Tate and they're like getting good with girls. That's a potential. Or maybe I can't imagine. You think they're looking old? Would you have had the balls in a million years when you were in grade 11 to like stay after class and detention and being like,'s up miss coops hell no um i want you think it's the guys who are making moves on the chicks especially in jewish school

she's got like hey uh hey mrs feldman i'd love to see what's under that wig she's like it's it looks exactly the same it's the same hair how you doing miss feldenman i daniel we have to talk about your accounting marks you go miss feldman yeah if you want to count how about count to one yeah how about you count to four inches inches yeah I don't know I always assumed it was the women who were taking the shots here it must be a little bit but it's like the guys have to be I mean I guess there's no like what is the penalty if you're a 15 year old and you make a pass

at your teacher like you get suspended you can definitely get suspended what are you crazy but if you're like really you don't you're not overt you're not like hey you want to go in the fucking closet and fuck you're just like hey you're looking good today like like you know you kind of start plying them like you would with any other woman you just you don't go like nuclear you just kind of like feel it out or whatever you give her when you're handing out valentine's you sort of drop on her desk and yeah exactly you know and there's like a couple rubbers in there and you go oh oh i'm sorry we just had sex ed last period like you know those got mixed up i'm so embarrassed am i embarrassed i don't know did i drop rubbers there that's just because i had sex i'm sorry because i'm a real man now oh i'm sorry that i left rubbers in there i just

have a lot of those because i have sex. Yeah, there are a lot of them. I do wonder if, or are guys getting emboldened because they see, like they're on the internet more and they're seeing how many times this is happening. Yeah, exactly. It's like, oh, teachers are fair game? I think smashing teachers, the extent to which happening, is guys running the 10 second, what was it?

Oh, yeah, the four minute mile? The guys running the four minute mile. I think that's what it is. He goes, no one could ever be done. He goes, actually, it's been done like 80 times. And then you go, get me my condom. So there's three or four in a row, man. I'm telling you, these women are getting out there.

So the first one, I'm 53, single. I've never desired sex more. And it makes people uncomfortable. And it's a pretty good story. She goes, I'm 53 years old. never desired sex more and it makes people uncomfortable and it's a pretty good story she goes i'm 53 years old i've been divorced for nearly nine years and i've recently ended a relationship of three years my kids are growing and i have a successful career what about those of us and she's talking to her friends she goes but she doesn't like the way the women are talked to when they're older and she goes what about us to still have all this libido um whenever i'm around my friends who are over 50

and i want to talk about this no one wants me to talk about it so when i bring up the topic of sex with women who are friends that are married or ones that are single all in their 50s i feel like a brick and it's uncomfortable it seems the the cloud seems to descend you know that pesky intuition that simmers when the surface that sends warning bells when you start to speak you know that pesky intuition that simmers when the surface that sends warning bells when you start to speak you can just feel the energy change in the room that's the feeling i get when i bring up the topic of sex dating romance and love with a recent heartbreak with women my age dude that guy dodged a huge bullet nine years ago that guy is probably like i don't care these alimony payments might be crippling me financially but boy did i dodge one

well and on top of that is she like her biggest problem is that she's like the women around me don't want to talk about this stuff and it's just so funny like having the weekly meetup of like 55 year olds in your book club and they're all just like you know they're like yeah we were watching this new like fucking hillary clinton's biography yeah yeah yeah and she's like we do something i'm fucking horny can we get something more sexy yeah she goes what'd you oh would you eat i goes i went to a really nice restaurant the other day what'd you have last night dick okay um mary let's again if you don't mind and she's like i was thinking about you know anyone here want to tell stories about uh getting

railed he's like i'll go first he's like no we're not gonna do that i got railed yo can we take a five minute break i need to go masturbate in the bathroom yeah so she's 50 like 55 years old meeting up with like friends who are talking with their grandkids yeah and she just can't and she's wrote this article being like what gives every time i meet up with all these old ladies they don't like me talking about all the fucking cocks yeah they're just like they're kind of over this she's coming in she goes tuned up last night she comes in with a walker yeah walking into the book club walking funny or she's like hey can i borrow your walker i got fucking reeled last night to me that was whatever maybe it took a long time to get there but the funny

part to me was just like that she she's like a bro she's like a 25 year old bro obviously the answer is you need to find like swinger friends or you need to find like yeah you're a swinger you you just have yes there's you can or hang out with people a little bit younger but it's like if you at the same thing of any age if you need the 55 year old guy that's just like non-stop that's all you can talk about. Look at the fucking guns on that one. It's like, can we one day? I can't imagine there's too many 55-year-old dudes. Yeah, there's a couple.

Yeah, but I mean, they're not the norm. It's funnier with the church ladies, though, just walking in and just like, how'd you guys do? And he's like, oh, my grandkid. I just spent the day with him. He's just learning to walk. It's like, that's crazy. I can't walk.

I got fucking two dicks last night. Okay. Speaking of grandkids, someone's grandkids fucking two dicks last night speaking of grandkids someone's grandkids fucking plowed me last night oh good god yes we're not even really that relevant yeah and then uh i went over to the bargain bin and they've got some good bargains speaking of bins i had to freaking spit out my car just everything and she's right to the point where she had to write an article being like none of the old ladies want to hear about me getting railed society's friggin society should be telling them that they should be talking about getting railed more i hate this yeah just uh

so this week we're gonna be looking at uh arthur b bradley's new book and she goes yeah um could i uh could i have some permission to speak freely last night when was the last time you guys got trained this is this this article was by uh it's our first article too so we got some more coming down the pipeline i think this is a smash hit for number one she's so mad that people won't let her um yeah that people won't let her talk about like all the dudes that are railing her that she had to start becoming a journalist journalist but she became a blogger became a blogger because nobody will listen to her like literally she's like not getting invited to the book clubs anymore so she goes you know what i'm taking it to the internet fuck all of you yeah the internet that is so true though

because if you're like no one in my social circle in the town that i live in wants to hear about like how many fucking dudes i've been guzzling she's like well i'll tell you where we'll hear about it the internet the internet i'll eat that gross gonna take a quick second to tell the people about a favorite sponsor of mine, which is Fume. Cold turkey may be great on sandwiches, but there's a better way to break your bad habits. And we're not talking about some weird mind voodoo stuff. From your crazy neighbor, from Kramer who lives next door, we are talking about Fume. They look at the problem in a different way.

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That's athleticgreens.com slash boyscast to check it out. Here's another one. My wife is trying to rope me into exploring her sexuality oh god it's the guy blogger this is so this is a hard one actually this is a dude where you go like i feel like he thinks it's a trap you think so basically his deal is his wife wants to have a threesome and he's just like 55 he probably can't even get it up anymore he's 50 she's 48 they've been married for 19 years and she's now bi. Yes.

And she goes, I'm bi and I want to have a threesome. And the guy's just like not interested in it. He's probably just like, he's just like, I want to be left alone. Like he's reached that point where being left alone brings him more pleasure than any sort of sexual scenario. So she's like threesome. And he goes, you two just go. Well, the problem with this. I'll maybe meet up with you

You are right But the Exactly Cause the problem with being The like 50 year old Like looking for threesomes couple The only real good way Is to have threesomes

Is like you kind of need To be in the party scene And it just You know what I mean You kind of are like Around some hoes You know what I mean Cause I

Or you become full swinger And neither of those Are that appealing to start You know what I mean That's why Hollywood people Itinger. And neither of those are that appealing to start. You know what I mean? That's why Hollywood people, it's a little easier because they're at those parties still. But your normal average guy isn't at a party. Most parties that a normal person's at, there's no girls around where you're just like, you want to hook in and come with us.

You got to literally do the thing where you go buy pineapples and you put them upside down on your front porch. Exactly. Just like some weirdos show up. So in his mind, he's like, this is going to be a whole lifestyle switch. Yeah, lifestyle switch at 50, you're like, the only lifestyle switch I'm doing is divorce. I'm not doing fucking this. Well, it's not really that appealing to be the guy at the bar.

I mean, it's a literal trope, the guy at the bar that's just like, the guy that buys you a drink and him and his wife are looking at you. I have two or three friends. So I know two different types. I know both. I know the type that it was like guys that have had threesomes just because they're like a round fucking, you know, people that be down.

And I also know a few people that are like in the lifestyle. And the in the lifestyle is undesirable. So basically, and they call for so basically and they're good they call them unicorns and they're all like oh yeah it's a unicorn it's like it's literally two gross people like shacking up with some pig you know what i mean i'm i tell you if you were if you're the couple at the swingers party you're not looking at a wall of tens on the counter no no no definitely not no you are looking couple at the swingers party, you're not looking at a wall of tens on the counter. You know what I mean?

No, no, no, no, definitely not. No. You are looking at, especially the type of girl that's there solo. So you can either be swingers where you're swapping around. But like, if you go to the swingers party, how many, the amount of girls that are like, I'm just here solo to hit a couple

is few and far between. Yeah, that's, I mean, hence the unicorn. So if you're not like some rich guy that's in the party scene, you got a big boat and girls could just come on. It has to be structural like that. Yeah, you have to have the boat. Like that's like, you got to live in Miami, have the boat. You got to be the guy.

You know what I mean? It's a lifestyle choice to put yourself in those situations. Or you have to be like essentially going to a lesion hall of creeps. Or you do like the resorts. That's even probably like all your vacations are like tied to your swinging yeah i guess again that goes back because if you got tons of money you could but again you're still swinging he's talking about a threesome if you go to the swingers resort this guy's that's the thing is like he's having this laid up for him like so

but he's not because she's not saying hey i found this girl and we want to have sex with you she's saying like you know well let's have a threesome and he's like yeah and she's like well let's get to work fine yeah i guess she might not be no spring chicken looking either but she goes over to a girl i'll be like maybe the two of us go home and you're like yeah he's just like he's probably just like yeah in his mind he's he's probably like yeah so you're gonna find another 48 year old woman lesbian oh last Lesbian. A 48-year-old lesbian? She's going to be like, oh, my husband's coming. And she's like, I guess. You're just going to literally just go sweep the floors of Home Depot to find some chick

to fucking bang wearing overalls? No thanks. Yeah. And then this guy is going to be there like, oh, okay. Do I go? He doesn't know. So I think it's one of those things where literally it's going to be you know they're going to go try and have threesomes they're going to be at the bar hey uh we've been we

think that you're attractive she goes oh thank you and they turn around we go okay so that well it didn't work and then then eventually he's just gonna be like i'm getting too old for this they're like both reading the game like trying to figure out she goes uh should we learn like maybe a tandem magic trick we'll maybe do it maybe we're both have a you know maybe it's like a group thing it's just the guy coming back with the game he throws in the garbage he goes it's broken i don't want to play yeah the game's broken it's rigged he tries artist seduction just trying everything yeah i hate this i like watching football more the couple just sitting in the bed together both reading the art of seduction yeah so you gotta go to your local tavern and then get turned down 80 times

yeah the only thing is if the girl was like i have it lined up it's this girl this is where she is she's like by and she's down she's crazy so like it really is like you want like she's a crazy alcoholic exactly you know what i mean so it's that's what you need that's the recipe right a crazy alcoholic that i started hanging around she's a menace but like at the end of the night we could probably bring her home no problem yeah and then she what you wake up she's like uh squatters right i live here now you go fuck not worth it this guy's probably playing out every scenario and he goes like it's only a few scenarios where this is a good good idea and there's most scenarios are a bad idea in his mind okay if you're not in

the scene i know people that are like good looking and have money and it's hard for them to like properly pull off the threesomes you know what i mean because it's really like scene dependent let alone like 55 average dude you know barb and chuck you know yeah so i think i get where this guy's going but more importantly is interesting the horny girl also coming out as bisexual when you're 50 and married is always always funny stuff yeah yeah i can't do that scene i was once approached at a me and my ex at a bar in uh madrid we were at this hotel by a girl by a couple um but that's no that doesn't interest anyone no and then the worst was i was talking to the chick and then she started telling me she they were older like they're probably like 10 years older they're

from new zealand and the guy had an earring like it was like exactly what you think too and the guy had an earring and then and then uh and then she started talking about her, like, she had, like, a broken pelvic floor from having kids. And I was like, I'm supposed to bang you later? Like, what is going on here? Like, I don't think, I don't know if you read the artist's introduction, but it doesn't include me knowing about your damaged pelvic floor.

And then at one point, the guy goes, so he's like, what are you saying? We go up to a room and maybe we watch these two. Oh, yeah, the accent. He said that? Yeah, yeah, yeah. He goes, maybe we watch the two of them and have a little fun. And then I was like, hold on.

And I think I went to the bathroom and then we ran away. Spanked one out. No, we literally, we ran. We go, yeah, let me think about it. And then we ran away no we literally we ran we go yeah let me think about it and then we ran away maybe we watch all these i was like i'm i don't want to do this i actually when i was with maya fucking like eight years ago or 10 years ago or whatever right this was that pride i think i've told you this probably but we were at like some bar and there was this girl and then we sort of

were like making out with her a bit and we're like let's take the girl home but she was a little older but like hot and then like we were on the dance floor and i was just kind of around and the two of them were dancing and she starts going she's dancing and she goes oh she goes both my kids are retarded she legitimately she was like oh you from around here yeah i've got two kids they're both retarded and she's told she's told my damn you know that was 10 years ago because nobody would say that during pride anymore he said yeah yeah exactly so she told her that both her kids are mentally ill and we're like oh this is girls that may be older than we thought and we're just like all right well i'll see you later good luck with that and she's like you sure you don't want to go back i keep them in the cage it's all they won't

interrupt us they got muscles you'll be You're not going to get bit or nothing. He's got a southern accent in Toronto. Boys, you're going to be fine if we just bring her back there. We got the kids in the old cage there. And you know, they don't remember. They got a real bad short term. So, you know, if he calls you dad, you just keep walking. Yeah, definitely. that's the type. Then Gwyneth Paltrow, Harney New Girl number three.

What the fuck is this? What is this? I couldn't. This is one of those things where I'm like. Gwyneth. What the hell? I don't know who's stupider. Gwyneth Paltrow.

The people who are buying this. Danny likes to give a lot of commentary before he tells people what happened. It's called the teaser, Ryan. People are now, their interest is peaked. Their interest is peaked. And maybe we'll just leave it peaked. Yeah, maybe we'll just leave it peaked. Gwyneth Paltrow hypes $150 vibrators to wear around your neck. So she's basically selling vibrators that you wear around your neck.

It's just like a little metal thing. It looks like. Now you can continue with the color commentary. It's just like a little chain. And then it your just like a little metal thing it looks like now you can continue with the color commentary it's just like a little chain and then it's just like a little stick well she's always up to freaking wacky ass stuff man gwyneth paltrow's wackier than people give her credit for oh way wackier that's what happens when you grow up in hollywood like that but uh it is really every hollywood person it's like you know dwight from the office he's been on the podcast circuit and obviously i really like dwight and i think that uh rain wilson's like i even like other stuff he's done and i think he's like super funny and like honestly he didn't even annoy me or anything as a person like i actually liked him but even

even him was like everything he talks about was like you know and that's why we need to get in touch with our chakras of our body and like we're all just energy so well he's like he's a big i know he's that but it was just high or whatever this new religion i know but it was just like is anyone in hollywood not into some wacky shit like i'll tell you who john c reilly has this like down knows knows this and i guess it's hard when you're famous because you want to like get the adulation that that you get from being like this famous thing but john c reilly's like i don't want people to see me talking because i don't want you to know what i'm like for real get the adulation that you get from being this famous thing. But John C. Reilly's like, I don't want people to see me talking because I don't want you to know what I'm like for real

because it'll ruin the characters. Well, it does. It does. That's true. That's what I'm saying. The more you see Rainn Wilson talk about this shit, the worse the office probably is. Yeah, and it might not ruin it for me,

but Will Smith, I like him a little less as a badass action star for sure it definitely like raised it uh lowered it a little bit 100 and john c riley straight up thing he's like i think he did one i think he did mark maron's podcast like once he's like this is it like i'm not doing anymore like that's really smart that's a guy that cares about the craft he does and he's like he knows that like his characters are all so much better when you don't really ever see him i guess it is is intoxicating for someone that's an actor and you go, everyone loves me for this other thing, but I want them to think I'm smart.

Exactly. Or at the very least, it's very unborn. It's like, who wants to be legitimate? I mean, every actor's fear is being typecast. It's having a thing that's so big, like your Kramer, maybe a bad example, but like Joel, whatever. So they want people to think you're more.

Yeah, they go, I'm not just this one character. And everybody's like, yes, you are. And they go, yeah, you're just this actor that plays lines. And it's like, well, I'm actually not this. I'm like a super intellectual or whatever. But it was just like, I couldn't listen to it. I was just like, who cares?

That's a lot of it too. You're not even really saying anything. And the girls are even wackier. at least uh brain wilson does seem like intelligent i'm sure if you're super into that topic whatever but some of these other people it's like it's just like you know they just have the wackiest opinions but they've never been told no so that's like a lot of them don't even have any pushback so it's like kind of like flimsy versions of like shit you've heard a million times from a 19 year old yeah and also but back to the vibrator necklace thing so this thing is 24 karat gold it's 200 bucks 150 dollars it's a 3.8 inch long pendant 0.5 inches wide what do you do if you you're out and you just

see someone wearing this oh exactly who what kind of psycho like dirt bag would wear can you imagine going on a date with a girl she's got a a freaking vibrator necklace on? Vibrator? I mean, on first date, you wouldn't hate that. Yeah, first date, you go, all right, this is crazy. You don't want your wife wearing it. You don't want the wife wearing that. Oh, your wife wearing it is a fucking nightmare. You know what happens, though, if you're with a girl and she goes, oh, I'm putting on this vibrator necklace.

You go, that's crazy. I'm wearing my flashlight chain. Full flashlight. Full flame of flame. Giant auto blow. You got the auto blow. A working auto blow. What?

You got a fucking backpack power source? Just to keep that shit going. You got your necklace on. I thought we were doing sex toys. Yeah, we're doing sex toy accoutrements, aren't we? Is that what we're doing? Yeah, that's definitely what I... You got to fight fire with fire.

If your girls want to start wearing a freaking vibrator necklace, gotta show up with the mother love you gotta stoop to their level but like just like an actual blow up like what do you see one give a foot fleshlight on the chain yeah the vagina jankle or whatever but like so chick is wearing, what if she's wearing one of these and you go, like, there's, like, some crusty bits. Like some dried, like. He's going to give me vertigo again. Gwyneth is giving me vertigo. Does she sell anything for vertigo? Does she sell some fucking stone you can shove up your ass to fix your vertigo?

She's starting to go vertigo fund me to get this off the market, my friend. It's probably going to sell out too, right? Okay, so we got one last horny woman from the horny woman segment. It's a pregnant woman that got exposed. You sent me this this morning. The pregnant woman that got exposed for attending two baby showers with two separate men. The fucking balls on this lady. I'm nervous about this lady, huh? So essentially what she did was she was going, she had kids with two separate men. The fucking balls on this lady. So essentially what she did

was she was going, she had kids with two guys and then instead of, she told them they're both the father and she still has, she's been going down with this. And I guess her mind, she's like, the guys are only going to come every now and then. I could probably pull this off. But it does, it's the Chris Rock joke where he goes,

a man's lie is I was with James last night. A woman's lie is it's your baby. Dude, where he goes, a man's lie is I was with James last night. A woman's lie is it's your baby. Dude, this lady has some nerve on her. Yeah, I don't. And then she got busted. I know. Yeah, someone.

No, the sister of the guy. So basically, one of the guy's sisters somehow, because they're probably in the same community, and they saw another guy post her thing. Yeah. You probably just see the Facebook post. It's incredible. So it's a big bust from her. Oh, you know what?

Interesting development right here. Very interesting development. One of the guys is wearing a Toronto Maple Leafs hat. Oh, it's a Toronto man's? I think this is a Toronto man's. No, no. Are you telling me it's not even my baby still, though? For real? Yo, honestly? Yo, if it's a toronto man's i think this is a toronto man you telling me it's not even my baby still though for real yo honestly yo if is it my baby and he goes yo you telling me it's his baby or my baby for real though still you need to actually decide though on the one on the two

yo i'm not even yo not even for real still kidding though you actually need to tell me what baby it is. You know what's the really, like, the sad part, too, is that, like, you should be able for both guys to be like, look, we're both out. Like, the law should allow them both to walk away from it. Definitely should. But one of them is contractually obligated to stick around. That's so crappy. That's like, you're cucked by the law here. I know.

Like, literally, like, in this case, Trudeau's cucking you again well they're not yeah they're cucked the law has been taking fucking slices at men lately i'll tell you i don't know if you saw the soccer uh the israel adonasi yeah yeah stylebender yeah stylebender so basically uh his wife is uh he has a girlfriend and they like broke up and she's taking him to court and i was reading the articles i mean well godspeed for this guy but even in the articles they were like the girlfriend you know we don't really know what's happening ufc fans wait patiently for an update and there's more latest news and i'm sure there'll be more information to come up to further

contextualize the news and you go what further information you're not married yeah but i think that like like are we moving past like i guess it's common law oh common law yo common law is the biggest scam going yeah they and honestly you need they need to be more clear on common law where you're just like okay it's three years and then that's tough at you with common law starts at three years and you're just like i think it starts in less than three years the lease comes up i think it's like six months yo that's some i thought it was like six months or something has any guy ever been able to pull that off where like he gets a famous girlfriend and like you know that's rich and lives with her for a couple years and then common laws her no probably not no no they just be like what yeah exactly imagine a guy chicks like you weren't even like there's obviously

instances where someone's ex-husband like like, got, like, you know, probably Tom Arnold or something, like, right? Well, a husband, of course. Yeah, a husband. Lots of those. But an ex-boyfriend to be like, you know what, I deserve, because I was around for the come-up. Dude, if that happens, I quit the world. Are you kidding me? I'm out.

I will fake my death. If they say that, oh, if you're with a girl. Johnny, delete what we're talking about right now. if you're with a johnny delete what we're talking about right now if you're with can't fake our death and be talking about faking our death that's that's true it's pretty crazy though that's one of those ones where you go oh come on yeah if he loses this and he loses half of his ufc but like he gets kicked in the face for a living she's just like oh yeah i made him eggs in the morning. Bitch girlfriend. Tiger Woods' girl is trying to say that he harassed her now.

Yeah, well, he got... She's coming out with all the stuff. She wants $35 million or something. Do you think that he can make the handshake take on... I mean, first off, he is the G of the century because he got his lawyer... $35 million, Harris.

He got his lawyer to break up with her legitimately she got a call she had the airport got a phone call from Tiger Woods his attorney being like you're no longer with Tiger Woods oh my god which I always thought because you know it's like the hardest thing to break up with a chick it's just like it's so hard and I always thought it'd be such a good idea

if there's such a thing like a service like a surrogate breakup service I mean that sounds like 45 different comedy movies from the 90s if there's such a thing like a service. Yeah, but he... Like a surrogate. Breakup service. Breakup surrogate. I mean, that sounds like 45 different comedy movies from the 90s. Sure.

But I don't know what the comedy movie actually is. I'll tell you what would happen is the professional breakup guy would fall in love with the girl that he's breaking up with.

Have her. Good. I'm just saying that's what would happen in the movie. That's fine. Oh, yeah, obviously. Yeah.

I guess that's what we're talking about. The breakup guy's got a lot of girlfriends. Like, what I was thinking of, you go, yeah, that exists. They're high-powered attorneys. Interesting. He'll just break up with your chick. Here's your package. Yeah, you basically, like, you're getting fired.

Yeah, you're getting fired. Security's going to escort you out. I will say the one fucked up thing with the tiger. And I emphasize the word escort, because that's basically what you are right now. And not because I'm a Tiger Woods stan, if you will. But the one thing that is kind of fucked up is she worked for him.

That's cardinal sin right there. They met when she was managing one of his restaurants and then she stopped. So he's going to have to pay up for sure because then she's like, okay, well, I don't managing one of his restaurants, and then she stopped. So he's going to have to pay up for sure, because then she's like, okay, well, I don't manage one of your restaurants because I'm now your girlfriend, and why would Kyra's girlfriend be a restaurant manager?

He's getting paid. Well, I mean, maybe not that. He's a billionaire. He could have moved up on the thing. She could have been the regional manager. I think it was a single. I don't even think it was a change. He goes, listen, you're not going to be the manager anymore. She goes, thank you. He goes, because I have good news. like the regional manager i think it was a single i don't even think it's a change he goes listen

you're not going to be the manager anymore she goes thank you he goes because i have good news you're going to be the regional you're being promoted you're not going to be the manager of one restaurant but you are going to be the restaurant manager of multiple restaurants yeah but anyway so and so obviously she can't go back to her job why not as well because her boss is her but he could say like i'm not particularly involved in that you can go back to your job it's still available yeah but she'll get some severance but again severance is like that's probably an 80 000 a year job that she had so she's she wants 33 million dollars or whatever it was because he said that she could live in his place in like his

mansion or whatever for I think the term was like 11 years and the cost to rent such a mansion is 3 million a year so she's like I want to live I want the money that would cost to buzz off yeah scram lady you signed the NDA buzz off whatever

she'll get if Tiger Woods she'll get a couple mil can take another quick second here to tell you about raycon now listen this is the option for earbuds that you're not breaking the bank on you know people have already probably know by now but this is sometimes you can buy raycon earbuds you can buy two pairs and you'll still be better off than you know the chump that just buy one pair of some of these other brands. You shouldn't have to pay an arm and a leg for a quality sound and essential smart tech listening features. This is a no BS product.

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Noise isolation, awareness mode, custom gel tips for the perfect, most comfortable in-ear fit, crystal clear call quality, eight hours of play time for everyday earbuds so listen if you if you hate money then maybe this isn't for you but if you like a good quality headphone at an affordable price go to buyraycon.com slash ryan long for 15 off your order plus get a free domestic or flat fee international shipping brought to you by raycon we have a new term alert are you ready so it's not similar to bugman really as much as i thought but basically on the internet a lot of people have been getting called wet lettuce man yeah it seemed like it could be similar to bugman i thought that's more what I thought.

So when I first thought, they go, wet lettuce men. So there's articles already defending wet lettuce men, which made me think that it isn't Bugman. It seems just like a good guy is a wet lettuce. Wet lettuce men are hotter than alpha males. So I thought it was two things. Essentially, because you know what they do? When they're talking about wet lettuce men,

and the big thing is they go, this is, you know, why isn't Neil coming out this weekend? He's washing his dog's hair. Fucking wet lettuce. So this is what Urban Dictionary describes it as. But it's been getting hot on the internet. It's literally a straight guy in a dress. It's a metrosexual or a actual gay guy.

Because they keep saying, they go, look at all these men. The girls, like, they like Harry Styles. Harry Styles is the first thing. In all of these articles they show. And Harry Styles, by the way, it's one thing if he was, like, you know, trying. Harry Styles is the first thing. In all of these articles they show. And Harry Styles, by the way, it's one thing if he was, like, you know, trying to do the rock and roll thing or whatever. This guy is literally just wearing, like, an old woman's blouse now. He's really out of control with his outfit.

That's what our boy Marino is doing forever, though. I don't know if he still is, but forever he was just, like, was going to, like, a vintage store. I don't really remember the blouse. Really? He was legitimately just, like, wearing women's blouses. Like, I wasouses like i was like i remember seeing him one time like in a stylish way yeah yeah he's a very stylish guy comic yeah but i remember seeing him i'm like my grandmother has this like literally like he was shoulder pads and he's like this is the new drip he's just like he

well he's a very fashionable dude he just wears all sorts of shit but yeah he was wearing just like grandma blouses well that's what harry styles is doing yeah he's like legitimately he's wearing a nun's outfit should we wear those it's not the one it's like it's it's set up where it like has the you know flannel but a little part covering the breasts or whatever so every article whenever they go oh yeah we don't like wet lettuce men explain that we like harry styles and the obvious answer is that yes girls like anyone where it's working try to be the fucking you know try to be the guy that's like the random guy that just wears like uh all women's outfits like you need to have some sort of like social status by the way there's a there's a photo in this of lil nas x yeah X another guy's a gay guy

with like a tube top on holding his chest with like a wig and it says a wet lettuce man is actually a huge turn on and he's like look at this photo to who? don't tell me girls like that he's gay

it's a legitimate gay guy wearing a tube top hey look Harry Styles the stuff you see walking around the West Village. The thing is, Harry Styles is not going to be like this permanently. Like, at some point, Harry Styles will be like, all right, that was fun. Well, at some point, you age out of that sort of shit too, right? Like, that stuff's a lot more cute when you're 25.

When you're like 75, like, I don't know if you know, like, there's a few people that I follow from music and they're like pushing 50 and they're still just wearing all that stuff and it was like it really really looks like a fat dude in a dress like yeah it's impossible for it to not just be comical yeah and you're like oh that's funny and he's like funny i'm expressing myself and you're like i mean like seeing alice cooper with like the like alice cooper is the is the like best example of because you don't need a radio show forever uh i didn't oh

so alex i don't know if he still does we had a radio show for a really long time and you know he has this whole persona like when i was a kid you're like oh alex cooper's like this badass like biting no he's like this intellectual yeah but then the more you know him you're like you're kind of like a dweeb oh really what do you mean a dweeb like he's just like he loves golf and you're like he's just like an old man But then he's like You see him in an interview Right now he's like 75 With like his weird makeup on

And you're just like I don't know The makeup Dressed like he's 30 And you're like I don't know Well that's what I told you There was one time I was on tour

When I was younger I can't remember what it was But one of the bands Had to do makeup And I saw the guy Arguing with his wife With his makeup on Before he was going on stage

I can't remember exactly, but it was like, I'm missing one soccer practice. You know what I mean? It was like real normal shit. Yeah, yeah, like super normal shit. I always just, yeah. Well, that's why I was laughing at the idea that, do you know how basically,

you know how like every award show, you know, like the Sam show you know like the Sam Smith and all that sort of stuff right like it's all of that sort of like devil stuff or even though the aggressive sex stuff just became so mainstream that made it not cool it used to be like do you remember when we were

like when we were whatever I don't know maybe it was high school but Alanis Morissette swore on the award show when it was like a huge deal she was supposed to go, and when you're thinking of me, when you fuck her. And she like did the swear

and she wasn't supposed to and it was like a big news. Now before those things, it's like, all right, everybody. You've got like the stage hands walking around. Like, all right, we're starting in two. We need the inflatable penis. Everyone get the inflatable penis on two.

Who's got the, they basically turned them all into guar. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Who's gonna control the button that shoots the blood out like come okay we need the blood come we're starting in three right after the best album for best family album we got best family album okay you know it's all the stage hands running around make sure that we got and do we have the big vagina madonna's gonna come out of the big vagina that's like that's like you know the family music awards or whatever which makes it like so much less cool when it's so corporate so that there's a bit of that with the corporate so that's oh what lettuce is by our chick mary madigan oh really

yeah but i thought so she likes them but i thought it was kind of a little more of a bug man situation but they're really saying so they go um when a man introduced me to the wet lettuce men who don't know how to be men anymore he elaborated but these kinds of men um are actually the kind that don't always pay for dinner and tend to take on more of a domestic load it's like let me be clear little noz x and harry styles ain't touching a dish hell no you know what i mean this is where it's like for a photo shoot maybe yeah they're so all I mean? This is where it's like... For a photo shoot, maybe. Yeah, they're so all over the place because they're like,

we like wet lettuce men. What about Lil Nas X, a gay guy, and Harry Styles, like, multi-millionaire musician? And then it's like, so, yeah, and what is a wet lettuce man? It's like a guy who, like, you know, stays at home, does the dishes.

You go, yeah, okay, not Harry Styles, man. Yeah, not Harry Styles. Sounds like a bit of a bitch to me. Well, yeah, what they really mean is, like, they're just being, like, a guy that doesn't have money and will do work yeah do whatever you can just bitch them around and they'll just do whatever and do your chores for you and yeah literally yeah i mean i don't do

either i don't do the man's jobs or their goods i go more of a eunuch i go listen i go a man's place is not in the kitchen or the garage. I'm at my workstation. It should not be a man's job to be in the kitchen fixing food or be in any other room fixing anything. No. No. I'm out both. So this guy seemed to believe that girls wanted alpha males and not equal

contributors but only you only have to look at the most famous men to see where the cultural shift and it was just like what are you talking you're talking about two guys they're talking about famous gay guys being like but this is where i went back to me it's like i think what they mean is like a metrosexual which i guess i like a like i like a sort of like feminine gay guy when he's rich and successful no one likes the famous no one really past you know 20 really has a big heart on for the fucking the feminine like gay guy that works at target no no not you're not holding them up as some sort of icon no unless you're just like totally in that world right yeah and then you're just like totally in that world, right? Yeah.

And then you're just the guy that's dressed in a certain way because girls like it in that scene, right? We want men to express emotions, push back against gender norms, and communicate. So she's turned the wet lettuce thing into being like, oh, we like men who are progressive. That's what really she's kind of saying.

I don't even understand what wet lettuce. Just look at the legions of men. Is that Australian lingo? I guess, yeah. I don't know. But look at the legions of men is that Australian lingo? I guess yeah I don't know but look at the legions of men who are obsessed with Shawn Mendes and you're just like are legions of men obsessed with women I guess sorry

legions of women he's also like a punk who can sing he's jacked and rich the moral of wet lettuce men so wet lettuce men I guess is when your boy is doing I think that how you and me would use it is you're like uh you're like yo you coming out everyone's partying you're like ah my girl's got me going to a baby shower you go fucking wet lettuce wet

lettuce yeah it's definitely to me it's more like that you go this wet lettuce dude oh we got some we got some wet lettuce on our hand we should we we should start using wet lettuce as the slur it should be it actually sounds like a pretty good slur to be like, oh, I can't do that. I'm wrapping presents with my girlfriend. It's the new whoops. Yeah. Whipped. Sorry, my girl's got me in the kitchen with an apron, you know, cooking his and her meals.

Wet lettuce. Wet lettuce. Wet lettuce. Whereas they're turning it into like a rich gay guy that also does the dishes. whereas they're turning it into like a rich gay guy that also does the dishes so they like a guy that bakes bread and doesn't worry about his masculinity well it's like yes they generally like any guy when they're killing it and then they then she got on about how andrew tate and guys like that sort of ruined everyone she goes but women aren't buying into it we want men that do housework clean chats like i'll say it for the

third time little noz x ain't doing housework no no no no he's not the emotional man ain't free just like the fun girl ain't free nothing's free nothing in life is free no wrote that right now oh you want it i'm okay i buy it off me. Can I license it? You can license it. I don't want to own it. I just want to license it. Nothing in life is free. I just licensed it to Bud Light. I was always laughing because I watch Yellowstone.

Yeah. And I talk about it a bit on stage, but it just makes me laugh on Yellowstone. It's just all the manly stuff. The amount of stuff that's not manly is like, a man that cannot saddle a horse is not a's just all the manly stuff that it's the the amount of stuff that's not manly it's like you know a man that cannot saddle a horse is not a man at all and you're like where i live men can't drive or don't if you can drive if you can drive a uh like a manual if you can drive stick shift they make you the mayor yeah for sure you get to be that you get to be the head of the fucking construction union if you can drive stick shift where I live.

Yeah, I imagine New York must have the highest concentration of people, like adults without driver's licenses and probably like- Of course. In America, maybe like the world. Me and you went from driving every day of our life to never driving again. But I still have a license. I'm talking about unlicensed. Yeah, well, yeah, I drive stick.

You can't do that. No, I can't do that. I mean, I can, but- Well, I'm not talking about the stick you're talking about. I'm a lettuce man of the wet variety ask me anything am I the oh

oh oh alright I'll show you my oh face I want to hear my O-face. Want to hear my haunted O-face? Yeah.

Oh. Oh. Is that getting blown by a ghost? That's getting blown by a ghost. Oh. Spooky. It's a spooky blowjob. Yeah. Spooky blowjob is very glorial speaking of

or no I actually was wasn't I was gonna just say am I the asshole for not wanting to share my name with my trans friend and nothing more than that then I just like it's so funny it was like you're friends with a guy and he like if you transitioned right now and you're like

oh I guess it doesn't work that way it's like I'm a girl and you're my friend and then you transition and doesn't work that way. It's like, I'm a girl and you're my friend. And then you transition and you go, my name's, I'm just calling with your name. You go like, it's the girl's name's Amanda. Yeah. The guy's name's Danny. Yeah. And then Danny transitions and she goes, oh, what's your girl name?

He goes, I'm thinking Amanda. And she goes, but that's my name. He goes, I guess we're both Amanda's. Seriously? You're seriously going to use my name, huh? And the girl's not happy about it, but she doesn't want to do things. You know, anything's involving trans people. You're always like, I think you're walking on use my name yeah and the girl's not happy about it but she doesn't want to do things you know anything's involving trans people you're always like we think you're walking on eggshells yeah say something amanda but if that's fucking say

something transitioning and then choosing the same name of like your best friend is like fucking winners on that topic there's an oscar. She goes, Oscar winner shares that my children are all queer, so she's got three or four fucking queer kids. What do you think the stats are on that, Pubby? I honestly, my first thing is I go, what are the odds? I mean, even if you accept the current odds of like one in five, which is definitely inflated. Yeah.

But even if we say one. Well, let's do it. Okay, so we have four kids like one and 125 we go we'll give her 20 odds that your kid's gonna be gay right yeah okay so we go is it one in 125 so we're giving her one in 20 no it's gonna be more than that so um basically your odds of having a gay kid at this point we're and we're being very generous by saying one in five yeah okay so basically so if we have four kids, it'll be 0.2 times 0.2 times 0.2 times 0.2 equals.

So it's, isn't it one over five times one over five times one over five? That's what I did. 0.2. So it'd be one over 25 times one over 125. Yeah. But this is, this is it.

Yeah. So it's basically. Less than 1%. Yeah, exactly. Yeah. 125 yeah but this is this yeah this is it yeah so it's basically less than one percent yeah exactly so then you would do divided by one equals so it's point zero zero one six percent yeah it's so then so the chance is astronomically less than one what are the odds if you factor in that your mom has the word gay in her name what's what her name. How does your mom have gay in the name? Marsha Gay Harden. And hard. I didn't know that.

One in four million? Your mom's name is Marsha Gay Harden? That's not true. Yeah, it's Marsha Gay Harden. Stop it. I didn't see the girl's name. So you have a girl. Not mine. Her name is Marsha Gay I didn't see the girl's name So you have a girl Not mine

Not mine man No your mom maybe So her name is Marcia Gay Harden She has four gay kids Fuck off Yeah Come on

That's a glitch in the matrix That's And all their last names Are gay then too Yeah Gay Harden She has four Stop it Yeah

This is where those One of the ones where i go there's probably a god because they this is god throwing a little something down for the boys he's sprinkling a little fun for you yeah yeah there you go come on yeah oh she wouldn't oh she wouldn't she was in mystic river i forgot about that good movie yeah yeah she Yeah, she has four gay sons. Three or four, but it doesn't matter. So the odds on that are very astronomical. But the fourth one, you know, it's the little brother syndrome. And the little brother goes, I'm gay like my big brother.

And then he goes, okay, fine. You can be gay too. And then the third one's gay. Yeah. And then the third one. The fifth. I mean, I literally, this is obviously, i had a trans uh woman who's like all against all this shit on low value mail yesterday and then someone else called in and this guy uh he's from belgium and he has two kids 15 and 16 and he's like they're both girls and he's like one

of them is goes by he him pronouns and the other one's a lesbian and he's just like this is no way like it's just like it's obviously a social that being said i'll give it more i mean it's two no but they're twins no they're not twins oh never mind no they're they're they're one year apart oh i thought you said twins no they're not twins but but uh okay i'm back with you yeah yeah but when you're saying but he's just like he's like the one was lesbian and now they're have a boyfriend and they're like over it and the other one's like i have he him pronouns you're like but presents is like you know a chick and he's just like he's just like it's crazy you think the dad he's anything yeah you think the dad's got gay sperm i'll ask him that's one of those things where the dad after you have four gay sons and then the like this is one

of those things where i don't think anyone cares like i mean i couldn't give two shits if i had like a gay kid or whatever but if you have three gay kids that fourth gay kid comes out you go no no no no we're going to the freaking you know what i mean we're going you're probably at that point during monster trucking at day one you're going to freaking army camp i'm not letting that kid yeah anywhere near rupaul you're like uh what color should we paint the nursery as goes we're fucking blue okay then it turns out to be a girl and then you got a lesbian on your hands he's he's got the game up to the belly you just play it he's just

sports highlights up to the belly just showing andrew tate videos he's like we're not going four for four here our name's already gay this is too much that is fucking but yeah you're like there's obviously it's obviously her doing well but that's the thing though because they say that there's like it's biological right i mean yes but obviously what's going on now like i mean we were saying it was biological 10 years okay but by that now we're in social contagion territory. By that logic the dad's got gay sperm. Yeah, yeah, for sure. He's a big old gay. I love it.

I'm not buzzing. Like you think he's just like you think he's probably looking tatters like being like I'm doing a gay sperm act out. Okay. I like you doing it.

Yeah, okay. Okay, I'm fine. Okay. Do you think though there's like Look at these eggs. I can eat. Nom, nom, nom, nom nom nom nom nom nom more for me

oh my god my head is fucking stuck in an egg I already ate that fuck it seems about right okay so there you go

she's married to a prop master is that a gay job yeah it's kind of a little like you know what some things are starting to uh some things are starting to come out give you a little light in the loafers if you're a prop master depends what she's a prop master on i guess if you're like prop master on like you what she's a prop master on, I guess. If you're like prop master on like, you know, action movies. Oh, you know what? Actually, something that is. If you're a prop master on The Princess Bride's

putting together wedding invitations. So the dad split in 2012. So that's, I feel like, a factor. Okay, dad comes home. Yeah, he goes, who the fuck touched my props? Yeah. He left for a couple of years. Oh, twins too.

He has twins. So now we want to do the the um the statistics so two gay twins i give the twins a little higher having higher you think so yeah that's my yeah higher yeah yeah i'm giving the twins higher it's more of a yeah no no i'm saying it would be more likely to gates i thought that there was not um there well i don't know i feel like they do the twin studies and they always kind of i thought there's tons of studies though where there's like one's not and one is no no i'm not well that's still more likely than not right but i'm just saying it's more like two random people both being gay is a lower percentage than two twins being gay in my opinion yeah I wonder

you know yeah yeah but you'd also say it's a lower percentage of their gay period because if they do have a gay gene they split it so they only have half

now we're getting into it now we're getting into the weeds that's more science this isn't a science podcast this isn't a science podcast that's just too much we're getting you know

that's like sort of above our viewers it's more like an acting out sperm gay sperm podcast versus a I can eat yeah

but anyways the dad the dad rightfully skipped town he went to get a glass of milk he's probably like he probably left

because he goes like you know what I gotta go impregnate someone else just to know just to figure I gotta know he goes

we're done we're done because obviously you only pump out gays and it's fucking with my head so i nothing wrong with it but i gotta go find someone new and just to see just gotta is this me or you yeah for just peace of mind yeah obviously yeah the answer is that that is a very encouraged you know that's a very encouraged idea in the household yeah imagine being how much of an outcast you'd be is like the one straight son like coming in just like you know working in the catcher's mid and the mom's just there like what the fuck is this shit goes go to your room you're grounded what did i do you don't have gender norms in this household the guys do girl shit the girls do guy stuff put definitely she puts like the

guys in ballet she puts the girls in lacrosse, you know? Yeah. Okay, so there was this... There's this woman, right? You following? You following so far? Okay, so this was in scarymommy.com. But I really like this because...

So this woman, she decided to do basically an experiment because she says her husband it's on it's kind of on the lettuce category right lettuce category she says that her husband uh isn't doing enough you know chores or whatever and she goes she goes a woman decides to cook dinner uh to not cook dinner to see what her husband will do and she said a mom fed up with the patriarchy brackets aren't we all yeah decided to put her husband to the test by conducting a little experiment to help prove her theory that women do everything and men are just as incompetent as she thinks they are so she's coming into this hot with not like a man right yeah she hates her husband her kid her male kids yeah that is like

toxic behavior number one obviously when people say like you do these like, well, maybe we'll see what happens if I just maybe stop. You know, I'll put my clothes on the floor and see how she likes that. You know what I mean? I'll just leave all my clothes on. Very passive aggressive. It's the most passive aggressive shit ever.

So I guess she makes dinner and she goes, what if I just don't make dinner? And basically the guy didn't notice. She got really mad about it. The moral of the whole thing was it's like it's a girl getting mad at just how easy it is to keep a guy happy yeah she just yeah she just wanted to see like so what happens if there's no dinner at 6 30 and the dude's just like watching the game just be like yep yep yeah it's the gist of what happened she's like are you hungry he's like what

no i could eat whatever she goes i'm not making dinner he goes okay i'm fine on that front too then so she puts this experiment together right and she's going viral so on top of that there's the added component that you got your wife on tiktok being like i'm gonna do experiment because this piece of shit you know what i mean put you on blast i'd assume this guy doesn't have tiktok though so that's good the experiment shows that men would rather starve than make their own meals and by the way i'm in this category a little bit yeah i've actually had similar things in this because i always say i go you know i like i want this i want this i don't care if you make meals like i actually i've never i always tell a girl like to be sometimes honest

it's sort of a pain in the ass a little bit because they all they make big meals and i can't control my portions you know what i mean so if i get like a if you're dating a girl like that's how you get fat is like dating a woman that like makes these extra i'm mostly cooked in my house so i'm mostly the cook so yeah wet lettuce man wet lettuce man but for me i go breakfast you know what has always bothered girls that i date yeah is that i do most can of beans most days i do cereal and i just cereal, and I have one bowl, one spoon, and I just put it in the same thing, and then I finish it, wash it, put it back, and I don't put it in the dishwasher.

Yeah, that's fine. Why would you put a single bowl in the dishwasher? Right. So they're always like, and they'll always be like, why don't you do the dishes or whatever, and I'm like, I have one bowl and one spoon. Like, why am I doing dishes?

Like, everything here you use, I have one bowl and one spoon. I never order food. So all of the fucking, all of it's everyone else's. Yeah, it's all yours, yeah. One bowl, one spoon. So I'll eat that. And then for, you know, lunch, if anything, I don't eat.

Or you eat one of those normal meals. And then dinner, I usually eat out. Because I have comedy clubs or whatever, something like that. So it's like, I've, so this is. It's a good system. Basically, she's. It's like a very, like, streamlined is good system basically she's very like streamlined simple it is a little streamlined yeah yeah so but the the gist of it is it's a girl trying to

get credit for something that the guy doesn't care about yeah in this specific scenario well he's just like i don't want this to be he's like if you're gonna make obviously he does all sorts of shit like i'm sure there's no scenario where the guy goes yeah i'm gonna let the fucking grass grow on the lawn until you fucking can't walk through it and see if she says and obviously she's gonna maybe it is maybe that's the passive-aggressive thing like but like there's no scenario where he goes look she's not saying anything like instantly she's bitching about it because what are you fucking not doing the thing or whatever like i thought that was your deal you do the grass i make the food so he's just like yeah that's our deal like every relationship has a deal has a deal everybody's like you do this you do this it's like generally there's like responsibilities i don't know

and it is it is one of those things where i'll be like why don't the doctors be the lawyers and lawyers be you know doctors he's probably like yeah the lawyers be the farmers and the farmers be the lawyers he's just like yeah i work because we the farmers and the farmers be the lawyers. He's just like, yeah, I work. Because we need farmers. That's the answer to that question. He's probably just like, yeah, you make dinner because I work. And you've been working on your screenplay for seven years. And you said it's almost done for the last four years. It's actually worse than that, though.

He's like, well, I make dinner because I've been working and you're making TikToks about how bad I am. Well, I was just thinking because I had a pretty hard day at work today and you were at home making TikToks about what a piece of shit I was. Yeah, you know, because like at my job, people, strangers come up to me and they know me as this piece of shit on the internet. Hey, it's the guy who doesn't think it was white for dinner. He goes, and i buy the food and so i feel like it's a good deal if you know you maybe like make it which you have been doing honestly it's been fine until you started making tiktoks but the funny part is that what you're just saying right now isn't what's happening what's actually happening is she's making the food and he didn't notice yeah she

didn't even say what you just said yeah i know exactly he's just like sure he said that would be me i'll never notice anything like that you know what i mean well food not being ready yeah yeah but but i also think he's probably a little savvy like he's there's a little gamesmanship on his part he's hungry he's going to like the basement to sneak like some snacks because he's like i'm not even there's no way i'm bringing this up to be on effect he goes he goes this is for a tiktok or something he's like fucking no way i'm not biting on this she walks in she goes how you feeling you peckish at all nine cameras nine ring lights flip on yeah no i'm all right no i'm fine she got the video set up everywhere there's like a guy with the plant on and the planet i'm playing hat on oh he goes no good so sometimes when i've absolutely had a fucking enough of being

this girl's had it up to hear with this guy. I like to conduct a gender-based experiment to prove to myself that all women, in fact, do everything. That men have no fucking initiative. And the patriarchy is a fucking hot bag of dicks. She's coming out hard on this shit. It's so funny because when he's had enough of being a husband, he doesn't not do a thing.

He kills himself. He commits suicide. She just doesn't make dinner one night and makes a tiktok about it another 30 minutes later she and her husband are still unfed

so she was 30 minutes in right now the clock's ticking she comes in dinner's 30 minutes late like he brought most people probably don't even really notice

that there's a dinner time did you have a dinner time at your house like did you have a specific dinner time specific no it was always when because my dad came home later because he just worked later so. It was always when... Because my dad came home later

because he just worked later. So it was always when my dad... When he gets home. When my dad came home is when we had dinner, which was usually like 6.30. Yeah, yeah. I never had, yeah. No, like dinners at this time sort of thing.

It was... Yeah, yeah, yeah. You better be home for dinner. So instead of asking her what she'd like to do for dinner, he's chatting to her about some butterfly crystals he found in the garden. So this guy's just living his life. No, he's playing the like to do for dinner, he's chatting to her about some butterfly crystals he found in the garden. So this guy's just living his life.

No, he's playing the game right now. You think he's gaming shit. She's like, hey. She's trying to drop subtle hints about there not being dinner. And he goes, I found these butterfly crystals in the garden. Isn't that wild? He's unaffected. Like totally just taking a new topic.

That is the move. We don't have all the information but that is 100% the move when you can tell she's huffing around up to up to something you have to pretend you ignore it yep because you have to pretend you just didn't notice at all yep he's totally and completely oblivious to the fact that dinner is not made yet it is very like just to live in that kind of small world meanwhile she notes that he's she's extremely hungry so now she's getting hungry that's pretty funny like so she's 30 minutes in and now she's starving to death and she's talking about butterflies watching the game so this experience

not going is planned for her the camera people i mean she's having i'm looking at her tiktok right now and she is having since this, a literal fucking meltdown. Okay? As a person, you're like, if this is your husband, she has. That's why he knows. She goes, anything about dinner? This guy knows better than to say anything that's going to trigger her. So this is her, not the most recent one, but this one right here, two ago, it says, yes, that's me as a fanny.

I'm dressed up as a giant minge to celebrate get lippy day. Oh, she's dressed up like a vagina? Like a giant vagina. Like, look. This is the kind of stuff that your wife's posting while you're fucking slaving away at work. I mean, listen, if you have a wife that's dressed up like a fucking vagina, I will tell you, I'm probably not expecting her to make too much dinner. I'll probably pick something up on the way home. That's one of those things where if you're on the internet

and you see in your feed that your wife's posting photos of her dressed up like a vagina, I think you probably stop at the bodega on the way home. Oh, here's another one. Here's our most recent one. It's eight years of being married to Roger. So this is the fucking loser's name. Married to Roger. And we're still going strong, even though I got his name wrong at the altar.

And it's her literal wedding day video. And it says, when you say the name wrong at the altar. She said her husband's name wrong. Do you think she did that on purpose for the clout? It was eight years ago. This is before clout existed. That is fucking nuts. now she's loving it it's all you know the funny is obviously like it was a name she says for clarity i've never shagged a roger it's a name of a different race too

deandre you know that doesn't even sound like roger you know what i just want to say that i can't wait to spend my life with you mu Muhammad. Oh, sorry. I mean, Bill. And she goes, what the fuck? There is no one that I'd rather be with than you, Lonnie Andro. And you go, what? This guy's literally been getting bitched around since the vows. We got to pour one out for this, bro. Sorry, Raj.

I'm gone. I'm so. So then he goes, I'm gone. I so so then he goes i'm gone i'm so hungry so i'm not cooking tonight and then my husband is suddenly not hungry either he'd rather starve than cook oh uh this is uh other comments so this is people in the comment section which i did for you um but they go despite her grumbling stomach she sticks to the plan i've got to do this for the sake of women so she's like on a for women she's doing a freedom fighting mission right now storming around the house with her experiment she's she's gone 45 seconds without filling her fat stomach and she thinks she's a

hero must be a fun fun home life i've got to prove a point after putting their son to bed around 9 p.m uh sure her husband finally offers to make a gourmet meal of fish sticks and fish fingers and chips. So there you have it. I'm eating at 9 PM and, uh, three hours later than we normally eat. I officially hate men. Yeah.

Huge win for Roger, by the way, Roger, Roger is just like this. Well, they like, he wants some fish, some fish and chips.

He probably likes fish and chips, but he likes it. But he's more so just like, she's falling apart now. Oh, he walks in, she's pulling all her hair out, and he goes, are you okay?

He goes, am I okay? Dinner's two hours late! Smashing plates. I need a fish stick! I'm, I hear me! This queen! Fish sticks! He's like, but I thought you said

you were going to make dinner. And she goes give me my tiktok yeah this is uh this is roger's i will say that my take to the only advice that i can give guys on this one is you do you are better off in cases, finding a girl that makes a little bit less money than you. You kind of need that leverage against that shit. You don't want a girl that's fucking putting lifestyle on her. You definitely don't want some chick who just has one TikTok that has a million views. You don't want that.

That's scary. That's scary because they just got a taste. She will need that. She's going to be doing some wacky ass shit. Oh, God. This chick, her sixth TikTok or something got a million views and then you're like yeah yeah so she's scary it's a taste but also you want to have a little bit more money because then you have a little bit of leverage so it's like at any if you make 50 grand find a girl that makes 35 grand whatever it is you fucking get in that you know

what i mean or you just need to be willing to walk away at any moment willing to walk away yeah that's who yeah maybe just avoid the crazies period yeah it's good advice it's not possible and one last thing we're going to talk about before we get out of here the elon musk george soros beef has been pretty funny yeah also elon musk put installed uh not for the boys ceo on twitter i can't tell everybody everybody i know i can't it's all over the place like some people don't like she follows all like joe rogan and donald trump she says all this stuff though but i know a lot of people that say this stuff that don't think this stuff so if you're in the corporate world i don't know she's making videos about how you gotta put a mask on and all that sort of stuff but whatever right but um you know and i think on and all that sort of stuff, but whatever. Right. But,

um, you know, and I think there's all these videos of her being like, you know, hate speeches, the worst speech in the world or whatever. Right. But on the other side of it,

it's like, I guess if she doesn't, if she's, I mean, again, he said yesterday he did a David Faber interview and he said that, cause you know, they have the community notes thing,

which is great. Actually. I really liked the community notes thing. I like it too. Yeah. Yeah. No, it's great. I even rate some of them sometimes just because for people I don't like, and then I write, yeah, thing which is great actually i really like the community notes thing i like it too yeah yeah no it's great i even rate some of them sometimes just because for people i don't like and then i write yeah it's wikipedia you literally do sometimes i'll write a note be like yeah fuck you

and then uh um but uh he said he lost 40 million dollars because two advertisers got community noted on their ads like so they post an ad which are still eligible and the ads were lies but like one of them apparently was a samsung ad that says like this camera can see the dark side of the moon like a joke and then it got like all these nerds being like um excuse me and it got community noted and he's like won't take them off uh he won't remove the community notes because it's just like a feature i think the community notes are good no community notes are great. I don't really exactly understand how it works, but it seems to work pretty decently.

It's straight up. Someone says something. And then if you go, this is a lie, then they post the context. Be like, if you click on the community note, it'll say like someone will, you can just make a community note or anything saying like, this is a lie. Here's like the proof that this is a lie. So like Joe Biden literally said like, like the president of the United States is getting community notes. And if enough people vote them as saying like, like the president of the United States is getting community notes. And if enough people vote them as saying like,

this is accurate, but wouldn't that just become like a partisan who votes more thing? Sure. But it doesn't stop anyone from voting, but theoretically, yes. But like, it's,

I don't think you could bought that. And especially with, no, but you don't know what I mean. If you're like, Hey, everyone go vote, put a community note on this.

That's wrong. Like what prevents, what prevents that for sure? Nothing. But I i mean i guess the other side could also say like well we're gonna you know do the opposite or whatever so and like they'll they'll vote like if i guess if everybody votes then it doesn't become a significant note because it has to hit a threshold to actually matter well soros is getting freaking flamed by elon musk and basically elon musk actually did a pretty funny joke where he said the he said the anti-defamation league should drop the a defamation league because it's kind of what they are but there's an update actually it is sort of

an unfair thing that anyone who calls George Soros you know a problem is like they just which they don't do with Sheldon Adelson which is funny because Sheldon Adelson's like a right wing yeah yeah exactly okay so sorry but anyways this is just an update for the thing because he says Which they don't do with Sheldon Adelson, which is funny because Sheldon Adelson is like a right wing. Yeah, yeah, exactly. Okay, so sorry. But anyways, this is just an update for the thing because he says Soros reminds me of Magneto. Yeah, that's what he was saying. And then people are like, excuse me, Magneto escaped the Holocaust or whatever and killed Nazis, blah, blah, blah.

And then people are like, it's anti-Semitic. And then three hours ago, Elon Musk said, i'd like to apologize for this post it was really unfair to magneto well he hates him but it is well a big part of that is he basically dropped all the tesla stocks so he was trying to basically like there's that too but i didn't actually realize until david david sacks did a big post on um well basically what soros did is he and then they described it, these guys described it as like trying to get outsized influence. But basically they found out that you don't need that much money to swing a local DA election.

Yeah, yeah. I had no idea. So you essentially like, if you want to put like a candidate in for governor or whatever, you got to drop like real cash, right? Yeah. But they're like, in these local DA elections, you drop like 200 grand. It's like a lot of money, right? So they would get all these DAs elections you drop like 200 grand it's like a lot of money right so they would get all these days in and they actually have a ton of power

so he's like that's why they're saying yeah he's like instead of just not uh making a lot like because they're like well they can't make laws but they can just like not uh convict people right so not not enforce them so he basically took like probably instead of funding a presidential run he funded like 20 000 of these fucking little tiny runs and it was like probably a pretty smart move i mean like literally like i don't know if he did alvin bragg in new york but like yeah he just gets these people who will you know like new york was notorious when we moved here they were doing that whole thing with the bail reform where if you promised to like show up to your court date they were giving you mets tickets and stuff and they were letting everybody out they were they were legitimately if you promise to come back for your court date you get tickets

to go see the mess which is like what like how about like we won't lock you up for longer like shouldn't that be the deal you go come back or we lock you up so like if even if you like you know went and punched a lady and robbed her i mean give you meds tickets for sure i mean it's like the jordan neely thing was like yeah he's been arrested 40 times and he's gonna get mets tickets probably was tons of mets games just like a met season oh my god like a met season seat holder okay we got a whole bunch more stuff to talk about so come rock with us on the patreon and watch episode one of bugman bears bugman and definitely uh for the patreon people when you're posting uh post in that

forum because it's like super easy to read. In the Discord. In the Discord, yeah. It's like super easy so people put all the articles and I was like going through all of it. It was like really well done but people posted the other one instead. So that one's the best one. Patreon.com slash TheBoysCast. And we're like three and change away from Bugman vs. Bugman 2.

Yeah, it's pretty sick. I'm like pretty pumped with the way it goes so i'm like should we let the patrons vote on the next uh bugman versus bugman yes we can do something like that maybe a little participation yeah well you guys want participation medals yeah we could do that but yeah no we take ideas but i think that a lot of them might be logistics like if someone's like of course go parachuting we might no no they don't get this. We'll provide the options. We provide ones we think we could do.

Yeah. Obviously if people do something, go to Mars. We're like, that's not feasible. Okay. Peace. Later.