The Boyscast with Ryan Long - MOM MAD HER KIDS WON'T TALK TO HER ABOUT S*X, JONAH HILL & LYING FOR AFFIRMATIVE ACTION

Episode Date: July 14, 2023

Ben and Jerry in trouble for basing their headquarters on Native land, New ailment: Irritable Male Syndrome, and an Aboriginal man in Australia gets paid to go to college, so he's been going for 20 years. SUPPORT OUR SPONSORS: Goodr - Go to goodr.com/boyscast for free shipping! Fitbod.me - Go to Fitbod.me/boyscast for 20% off your subscription! AG1 - Go to drinkag1.com/boyscast for free year supply of vitamin D and 5 free AG1 travel packs! SUPPORT THE BOYSCAST: https://www.patreon.com/theboyscast http://ryanlongcomedy.com MERCH - ryanlongstore.com Ryan @ryanlongcomedy Danny @dannyjokes LEAVE US A FIVE STAR REVIEW! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Woo! Ryan, where have you been? Little something called surf culture. You ever heard of it? I was at the beach all day. I started surfing, met some of the boys. We ended up starting a podcast. Wait, you were five hours late because you were doing a different podcast?

Yeah, it's called the Surfcast. No mics, no electronics, just boys out on the water surfing, chilling, chatting. We're going to stockpile some episodes. Listen, if you're going to be late, the least that you could do- Okay, you insecure fat man. You need to stop with this controlling behavior. I wouldn't expect you to understand surf culture. You're tight, by the way.

You, Jonah. Look, it's not surf culture for you to tell me to come in early and then you're late. I'm not going to try to explain to you how surf culture works, okay? The boys get together. We started some podcasts. We had some drinks. I bought them to dinner on your credit card. Yes, surf culture.

Now they're on their way here. Who? Who is what? Yes, the nine boys are on their way here because I thought they'd be a great addition to the podcast, potentially Mike's two through 10, and obviously that'd bump you to 11, but it'd be a good way to promote the surf cast. So anyways, we're here at the surf cast. Could you please not promote another podcast on our podcast?

I'm actually in awe right now. Now he's controlling my social media behavior. I hope everyone sees this. What? Look, my therapist says that it is not okay the way that- My therapist! My therapist! The only therapy I need is hitting the waves, looking for that next big bomb.

I wouldn't expect Barneys to understand this, so that's why you're giving me Michael Levin for life. I don't want to argue. Could we please just start the show? This is a man trying to dim my light, and honestly, everyone's watching is going to be empathizing with what I'm going through right now. I have boundaries, Ryan. I'm a man that doesn't want to see me shy.

No, I deserve respect. He hasn't hung 10 in a single time in his life. Wouldn't understand surf culture. It smashed him in the face with a surfboard. What? Hey, what's up? Is this the surf tavern? Is Chad there?

Yeah, because I'm currently being abused. So if you can send a paddy wagon, do you guys have one of those? No, I deserve respect. By the way, a large paddy wagon. This is a fat, insecure man. And you're going to have to take him in there kicking and screaming. You know what? Screw you.

I hope you have fun with all your new men on your new podcast because I quit. And you know how I told you that your Salt Life tattoo is cool? It's not. Boys, boys, boys. You already know what it is. The boys cast coming at you. Lotta, this is the only Jonah hill take that you're going to need in your life however before that we have a few other things yes we do one teaser if you want danny got the the peen enlargement he's up to fucking a couple inches yeah he's all girth

the best here's my favorite thing this week though is because it's like it was your standard thing but it always comes up where they you know some girl says like something like menstruators and everyone's like oh they shouldn't say menstruators so they're calling the girls bleeding people yeah this is this is how it started they weren't happy with menstruators isn't bleeding people a horror film from the 70s that's what i'm saying so basically it started out with like oh they replaced him with menstruators right and then some people weren't happy with menstruators like even even some people like young turks and those types of people were kind of like this is where i draw my well that's yeah isn't that like their whole like imploding over there because and then also there's another thing where they don't like menstruators because men's in the words you know what i mean

something like that then legitimately the place came up with bleeding people and i was like that might be my favorite thing i've ever heard is describing women as bleeding people yeah because they couldn't even say like women straighters because that actually would still be like it still says women well that's the thing they can't you're right for gender inclusivity they're like well it could be any gender men but yeah so it's like that one's not liking a lot but my favorite thing is just the idea of like yeah a couple of you and your bleeding buddies or whatever the blood blood oath crew right boys and now i can't say boys they come out and they're just like it's one day this

is gonna be like the head of freaking you know the it's gonna be like you know start in finland or somewhere super aggressive and it's like their health secretaries come out and it's like we are now men and blood-soaked monsters there's two categories of people inclusive uh language in our ever ending quest to be as inclusive as possible we have we have we have two categories of people we have men and bloody crotches okay bloody crotch gang are you in you're in the are you coming to the men's section or the bloody crotch section oh look at these freaking bloody crotches coming down here bloody crotchety blood the blood girls the blood girl blood oaths yeah he who bathes it or she sorry can't be here she sounds like they who bathe in blood yeah it's just anybody who bleeds we have men and then we have

the bloody people blood dripping down the walls it's dripping everywhere their underwear is covered in blood even a tampon was no match for this bloody mess oh that's the technical term yeah this is like what we call it now we're an advanced society so we don't refer to them as women every doctor as yeah we're an advanced society every doctor has like a you know someone that travels that just says like trailer noises you know what i mean so it's like on the men's is like oh we need a translator for the women to come in so are you one of the blood-soaked monsters crawling along the walls just leaving your bloody puddles every which way that you go smelling up the room zinc everywhere or is it uh are you a non-binary you think there's a market for because like there's so many people like chop chopping their dicks off and then getting a non-binary? You think there's a market for it? Because there's so many people chopping their dicks off

and then getting fake vagis or whatever. Do you think there's a market for some sort of product that you insert in your fake vagina and then it's like a slow delay? Slow release. Slow release, right? It's like those things you put in the dishwasher, like those dishwasher packets or whatever?

But it's one of those. And blood. And you just fucking jam it up there. And then you just wait. And you go, huh. Yeah, they go, are you bleeding? And he goes, maybe I am. Looks at the camera and winks.

I guess I'm on my period. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Another blood-soaked monster. I'm all just crawling along the the floors leaving a pool of blood because they have probably like a goop product that'll be honestly i could see that coming blood pouches well someone else was trying to make a good argument which wasn't that crazy but it was just stupid as they were basically well the reason i'm saying it's not that crazy is because i sort of like the sounds of how we could use it but there was like a this wasn't even really on some like you know

social justice shit it was basically saying that there is men that they were basically describing as a period but they were basically saying that men have something called uh what was it called oh fuck they have a good name for it irritableritable male syndrome. Oh, right. And I couldn't tell if it was like a girl trying to push some shit or it was like some nerd. But basically the idea was they're saying that like testosterone in your body will make you feel differently. They're trying to give guys PMS. I think that that's what they're saying. But it's one of those things where even if their reasons are like, we all have PMS. It was like, okay, so we can have all the benefits now if nothing changes.

I'm not coming in today. I can't tell you why i have male male this is female propaganda i think it is propaganda but you have to use it against them no i'll tell you why it's propaganda because when men have their pms it's not pms it's irritable so irritable male syndrome or whatever right it's like if you just get rid of women it goes away but women if they have pms all the time like you don't get rid of men and their pms goes away you think that they're you're saying that they're suggesting the next logical conclusion is we need to get rid of them no i'm just saying it's like a chick made this up goes oh yeah like testosterone levels drop daily monthly and seasonally the daily changes are not enough for you to really are are enough

for you to really notice men's cycles blah blah blah blah blah so they're trying yeah you're right it is women propaganda so i will give you that for sure but again with all these things it's like the same reason as you have to you know you can have like 12 fucking chicks for feminism it's like imagine getting out of everything yo oh danny can you make dinner tonight you can't it's fucking you're a male oh yeah i hope that i hope that the guy the unfortunate man who's with this female is weaponizing his that's what i'm saying you have to weaponize it but she is probably like well you know she'll never let him out shine so it's like he's got bad whatever it's called ibs or not ibs uh irritable ims her pms is gonna be fucking roof next year next time. You have PMS, I'm IMSing.

You're more IMSing. International Monetary Fund. Yes. My people. That's his peeps, you know what I'm saying? No, but you can't tell me a little bit. You can see a scenario where you could just, if you were with that girl a little bit,

she's like on PMSing, you're just like, I'm not going to be able to move today, I'm IMSing. It's a video game day today. But you're like yeah you know i can't leave my game zone when i'm not even like a pain thing though you're not like a chick where you're like oh my stomach you're just like i'm grumpy that's kind of what it is but that's what i was saying earlier i go but if the chick leaves you go feeling better i don't get what you're doing

you're making here because it's just bugging you yeah it's bugging you no she's bugging you that's why you're irritable oh yeah i see what you're saying it's the's just bugging you Yeah it's bugging you No she's bugging you That's why you're irritable Oh yeah I see what you're saying It's the chick that's making you irritable Irritable right Right now I'm getting your point Right and so then you get rid of it She's like oh it's your testosterone

You're like well you know Fucking amp up my testosterone If you fucking scramaroonie Skedaddle All of a sudden the IMF goes away Yeah all of a sudden You get on Xbox Live Playing with the boys

A little COD in the IMS Danny doesn't want to use the IMS. I'm going to be on that, man. Imagine the first time you said that to a chick. She's like, shut the fuck up. Especially if she didn't know about this show. She's like, please just stop. Please stop.

I read it on Your Tango. What the fuck is Your Tango? You got some chick you met in the Bronx? You're out here trying to pitch this bullshit yeah yeah yeah what the fuck white boy saying about your tango what the fuck is your tango your tango you dancing with people without me all right okay so i just got back from newfoundland and it was a blast dude and we sold out the two shows with two days notice i want to say toronto and vancouver those tickets are moving toronto's more than half sold out it's only been like a

couple days yeah so you honestly want to get those tickets because moving. Toronto's more than half sold out. It's only been like a couple of days. Yeah, so you honestly want to get those tickets because that show will sell out and I don't think I add another one. I've never not sold a show out in Toronto in like three years. You're going to keep that streak. Go where? It's the biggest venue.

It's like 1,200 seats or whatever and it's already like half sold out. So honestly, if you listen to this podcast, go buy those tickets. I'm telling you, ryanlongcomedy.com. Get on that. You know what I'm saying? But Newfoundland, just want to do a quick thing.

So this is the boys over there are fun. The buys. That's what they go. They go, the buys. The buys, yeah. So you go to these small towns, they're ripping. Did you get screeched in? Tell them that screeched in.

Did we have to do the shot and kiss the fish? We have got screeched in. We drank the screech. We didn't do all the fish. What, you just got blown by the fish? Well, no. We just drank. Turn around, Ryan's dicks in the fish.

You go, yo, fucking New York City slickers come up here and face fuck our fish? we didn't do all the fish why you just got blown by the fish well no we just drank turn around Ryan's dicks in the fish and go yo fucking New York City slickers come up here and face fuck our fish I had sex on camera like Dustin Diamond sex on camera Dustin Diamond

that's what I did so screeches they make you drink this weird ass screech shit and then you're supposed to kiss a fish and they call it

getting screeched in or something like that and while you drank it we wouldn't kiss the fish no there was no fish involved they just brought us some scree in or something like that. And while you drank it, we wouldn't kiss the fish. No, there was no fish involved. They just brought us some screech. People recognized me.

So all the bartenders kept bringing shots and stuff like that. It's big down there. But they didn't have the fish? No one comes around there. It's me and Joel Plaskett. Yeah. Joel Plaskett's the only guy. Joel Plaskett's the only guy. And then the guy from Great Big Sea.

Yeah. So that guy's there. It's like every corner, that guy's playing a show basically. Really? He has a show every three days, it feels like. People know where his house is and stuff like that. They go, oh, that's the great big C. The best slang is they go, oh, you getting at him tonight?

They go, getting at him? Every song sounds like this. Eyes that buys the time. Yeah, it's all shanties. Time that buys the time. It's all sea shanties. Time that buys the friends and buys the time. You can make every song that they ever have from those East Coast-y sort of places,

you can make in 15 seconds. Yeah. They're in no hurry over there, by the way. It's all pirate music. Every song is the Ants Go Marching 2x2. Legitimately, their entire catalog of music is the Ants Go Marching. The boys, the boys, the boys. So it's that over and over again.

And then, yeah, a couple little pirate jingles with different names, right? Yeah. I've never seen a place where servers give less of a shit about doing their job. And there's nothing worse than the servers that come out there and they try to memorize an order with four or five people. These girls wouldn't touch a notepad with a gun to their head. You know what I mean? So they come up there, five people, and we go, just pull out the pad. And she's like, no, I got this.

Then 45 minutes later You go I remember one time The girl comes in She goes Can I help you guys With anything And we go Just the water

She goes Okay just no big deal I got five tables So I go Then why'd you come over here It's been half an hour You didn't bring us the water Just checking to see

If you're fine You go Well no we're not You haven't brought us anything It's been half an hour And she goes Well we got a lot going on here And then she comes.

She brings the wrong meal for three out of five people, right? Not bad. Three out of five people. And not like close. We're talking like someone orders fish and chips. She brings them shepherd's pie. We're not talking like even in the category. You know what I mean?

And then every time they go, oh, sorry about that. She goes, well, will that do you? And you go, no, I'll take what I ordered. Oh oh they were trying to just be like you get what you get out there right there's like you difficult city people that's definitely the vibe they couldn't fathom that we actually want what we ordered right and then they'd come back 20 minutes later and then be like yeah how's everything tasting and you go well we haven't touched it because you said you were going to bring us our actual order member and then she goes oh yeah you're still fixing for that you want you yeah we're still fixing for what we ordered it's like just even getting what you

ordered is like a you know nightmare right so as a one funny thing is that it's uh there's some black bros over there in the crew and then uh the way they're talking to the big girls and we're saying they're the the kaplan because the kaplan bringing then they were talking to the big girls and were saying they're the Kaplan because the Kaplan bring in the whales. You ever see the black guys saying they're the Kaplan? That's the fish that comes in in the whales tracks. You got a black guy in the crew, all of a sudden the whales start popping around.

Saying the black bros are the Kaplans. That was good. Then call them the girls chum dumpsters. Chum dumpsters? It's a very East Coast terminology. Girls are real chum dumpsters. There's another thing, too. We had big crews or whatever, and then there's these two girls that came over,

and they're just sort of doing shots with the table or whatever. And then we kept saying the Cougars. The girls are two years younger than us i'm two years younger than you guys the cougs are over here we don't make the rules apologize girls are rules the cougs are out in about a couple years younger than you that was doing me another thing we were liking is uh with people that were trans and not trans because like uh there's some of that is that how they classify them over there no we're saying they're not trans no it's stock parts or not so a girl would come and you go you think

that one's got the stock parts or not there's a lot of trans people with pei yeah because it's sort of hit and some of them have yes it's yes. So the entire art scene, everyone's trans. You know what I mean? Yeah, it has happened. But they don't do it that well, right? It's mostly like a dude in a tube top kind of thing and long hair. But they're sort of going with them. Not quite passing.

They weren't passing, right? They were in the lazy room. But it's a good way to refer to it when you're just wondering. It's like, you think that is? You go, stock or not? Stock. He's like oh this was he went home with his girl last night stock so that was a fun one that i was doing interesting yeah we're saying we're just i was loving the idea of like the this is gonna be tough for me to put into a bit but i was just loving the idea of like because every time it's just like one guy sort of in the corner playing i use that by is that by is that but and then we're saying like

if you just uh one guy that's just like you don't really listen to the lyrics and you finally realize he's singing a song about having sex with the fattest girl ever and everyone's kind of just like wait what and he's just like she was a hundred she was a kilogram she was a hundred kilograms if she wasn't inching about and then everyone's like what was that and she goes and she's right here at the back call the bar amanda amanda the biggest girl i had you know what i mean just slowly being like who is this a singer you know what i mean and the guy starts playing in the fiddle yeah yeah i wish it was a natural disaster because there was nothing natural about that and then sorry starts having sex he was she was an iq of 40 and they were like is this guy

singing a song about having sex with a retarded chick she had a 40 iq if it was one point just like the one guy that just like all his songs are rhythm was heinous shit but it's sort of faint in the background so no one really picks up on it so that was pretty funny to me that was most of my stuff and then probably the last thing that was making me laugh was no you like strip clubs won't let you have track pants yeah inventing uh a pant that's jeans but it just has one it just has one square of track pants around the crotch like sewn in yeah like you know how they have um chaps or whatever yeah so basically it sews in one square of track pants around the crotch area and they're called gentlemen's drawers. Do you think that would be a good... I don't understand.

Are they on the outside or the inside? Well, the reason you can't have track pants is because if you get hard or whatever, the girls will be touching your hard dick or whatever.

Oh, that's the... I thought that was just like we're a classy establishment and no track pants. I think that's how they say it but I think the reason they don't want it is because the guy's dicks

would be flopping around in the track pants. Oh. I'll pass on that. You don't want to wear gentleman's drawers? There's just one square of very thin fabric It's like a totally different

But it looks the same It's like how they sew it into the jeans for cowboys You're talking about jeggings I think right? I think that exists It's called jeggings I'm taking this to the dragon's den I'll tell you that much You just want to wear jeggings

Literally looks like jeans Made out of leggings No it's one square or in the middle I'm saying jeggings are the whole thing i don't want but they look like you heard it here first i don't want to wear a jacket we gotta tell the fellas right now about gooder i cannot i actually cannot okay dp's got him on i got five pairs yeah i was wearing them all the time in Newfoundland. It's like, it is the best thing.

It's a thing that I've thought should exist forever. Because a lot of times it's hard to find the good inexpensive ones. You know what I mean? So these are just a hot deal. You can pop, you go buy five pairs and then just not think about it again for the rest of the summer. And you just have always different ones to kind of pick from. They make $25 active sunglasses that don't slip, don't bounce,

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Find your pair at gooder.com slash boys cast and use the code boys cast for free shipping. Next, we got to tell the fellas about Fitbod. So me and Danny have both been in the gym. We've been out there and I've been on tour like crazy so i've been in different gyms too i've been basically on my system is i've been running uh every day and then two to three days a week i've been working out getting in the gym yeah i've been on circuits that's what i've started doing like the ones where you almost go like half an hour or whatever you know what i mean but basically whatever gym you have they'll give you a customized plan football is the best because you know you can just it'll give you new exercises you wouldn't even think to do like for

the muscle group that you're working on but it'll be like hey why don't you do it like this way and you're like oh i've never done that before yes exactly it's really good hey listen you're not the same person you were at the start of the year so it's natural for your fitness journey to have ups and downs whatever your fitness level or whatever your goals are fit bod builds a dynamic workout plan just for you and optimizes future workouts based on your personal progress, which is what Danny's been talking about. Technology has replaced a lot of old formats, you know what I mean? And FitBod's got AI technology and it is hot. Your goals are always changing over time. Actually, we lost like probably eight to 10 pounds too, right? So your goals are always changing.

lost like probably eight to ten pounds too right so you're sort of your your goals are always changing so the app will help you adjust with that fit bod creates custom workouts based on your personal goals experience available equipment and more build your fitness habit and stay consistent all summer long fit bods powerful technology understands your strength training ability studies your past workouts and adapts your available gym equipment also watching the arnold docs we got me hyped up i went to the gym here before we got here. Oh, really? Oh, the Arnold Doc gets you into it, man. He's saying that people were telling him the one thing he wasn't good at at first

is he needed to work on his calves. Yeah. Said that all the other guys that were like that. That was the biggest thing. The one guy I tell them, he's like, your calves are too small. They keep your gym sessions fresh and fun by mixing up your workouts. Keep track of your achievements, personal bests, and FitBod's progress tracking charts. Learn new movements the right way with over 1,400 exercise demonstration videos.

So wherever you are in your fitness journey, get the most out of every workout with FitBod. So you get 20% off your subscription at FitBod.me slash boyscast. That's F-I-T-B-O-D dot M-E slash boyscast that's f-i-t-b-o-d dot m-e slash boyscast so jonah hill i honestly hated the fact that our podcast was you know comes out on friday this week because i was like almost was ready to do an emergency podcast but i just got back tuesday and it was like it was going to be too not on not in the cards or whatever but so this is i've heard every bad take in the book right yeah it was a it was a real referendum on like what's acceptable and what's not and you probably have you know you kind of have the two different types of people you have the you know the liberal kind of take or you want let's say

i'll say girl guy probably take but then it was more like girl conservative it was like the girl take was kind of for the most part just like this guy's a monster the girl's right i can't believe he did this right and they're probably big pitch was that the pictures that he was trying to tell her to take down in my opinion they weren't that crazy right i agree so he was kind of like these pictures got to come down and then she serves and they weren't that crazy and they were using that one piece of evidence to you know yeah and i'd just like to add that there's a lot of the story thank you we there's a hundred pieces to the story we've seen two of them that is correct and then the conservative take was a little bit like yeah that's right girls shouldn't

be thoughts and he was putting down his boundaries right sure so to start out you have to sort of put it together a little bit what we're actually dealing with because a lot of you know you have to sort of put the pieces together if you're dealing with like jonah hill is the type of guy that's going wearing matching outfits with his girlfriend. You know what I mean? They're wearing matching stuff to the premieres. He's going all in within two seconds. You know what I mean? Yes. And also posting every last feminist thing.

He's an emo boy. That's what always kills you though is the moment that you're like the super feminist guy, you really paint yourself into a corner. It's like, dude, your best friend is Leonardo DiCaprio. Like, come on. And he's posting every last little thing you can post about how, you know, women, men need to step aside and blah, blah, blah.

You know what I mean? And listen and all that stuff. And then on top of that, you do have to take into account on their side, the girl's side, that he does have a lot of the like used to be fat insecurity stuff you know what i mean and that just is a fact yeah so those are just like the facts of the case going into it right then you sort of come out the other side and then where you start with okay that's the stuff that was going on with him like this is an insecure guy also a billionaire you know also a multi-millionaire also you know alice actor all that stuff right as alice as he gets this girl is a clout demon that's a fact anyone who's ever dated sort of like a surfy

type girl that's that sort of deal and especially this guy's in his 30s he dating a girl she's 24 years old or whatever partying every day with the ex-boyfriends it's like and a lot of what's going on is that guys get into a situation he basically tried to make like a whole housewife you know what i mean and sometimes that works because sometimes especially when you're offering the deal of like listen yeah i don't want you fucking out with the ex-boyfriends and all this stuff but also because you're you know trying to be a you know trying to be an influencer and you know you want clout and all that stuff i'm gonna make your life better because i'm gonna actually make you more money and i'm gonna make you more clout yeah so you're the deal i'm offering you is not

like i'm not giving you the like i work at the hardware store and i want you to stop doing everything sure this guy's like you're looking for clout you want to be doing all this stuff you don't have to do that anymore you got the jonah hill deal coming right at you you know what i mean yeah i think it's a good deal also do we have to pretend like no woman has ever made demands of some guy if a girl. That never came up once. I couldn't agree more. Women have never been like, hey, it's like if we're going to be together, this is the deal. You got to post me in your shit.

You got to do all this stuff. I don't like Jeff. I don't want you hanging around with this guy. How many guys get a girlfriend? You fucking never hear from them again. They go in the witness protection program. You're like, what happened to them? You got a girlfriend you fucking never hear from them again they go in the witness protection program you're like what happened to them you're like got a girlfriend jehovah's witness protection i'll tell you yeah that never came up that was like never i was like reading all the discourse this none of the discourse was like women do this all the time and it's yes it's called it's a

everything is like setting boundaries and knowing your worth when a girl does it and when a guy does it he's a toxic abuser yeah it's literally and then so yes this is the for sure a huge part of it that i couldn't agree more with that and on top of that you kind of have a situation where he basically was trying to you know make this into like a housewife or whatever and on the topic of what you're saying, that idea that it's always bad, it's not always bad. Like there's a million people that were like, let's say we knew, right? Yeah. They were kind of like doing comedy, drinking every day, doing drugs every day.

And then they sort of date a girl that has a good job. And she was like, listen, I want you to quit this stuff and get your life together. And then you see that guy five years later, his life way better than oh for sure so it's like it's not always worse to you know if someone's like a high status individual and they're sort of like telling you they want to bring you up of course not only that like that chick is obviously of the you know the the feminist camp of like you don't tell me what to do and is it not to be told what to do like women have been told what to do for yeah for time immemorial i'm not to be told what to do. Women have been told what to do. For time immemorial, I'm not going to be told what to do. If I was Jonah Hill, this is my negotiating tactic.

I go, okay, these are the things I want you to do. She goes, I don't want to. He goes, okay, hold on. Pulls out a phone, opens up Instagram, goes to the unread messages folder. I go, have a peek what's going on in here right now, okay? Just go through. And then we're going to do my bank account next. Yeah, we we'll do my bank account next but just go through my unread messages just see

what's going on in here and then let me know if we could maybe just have you remove a few pictures from instagram if that works for you and then next year we go to the fucking osars. How does that sound? Danny's preaching right now. Well, man, I'm at the very on point commentary. I don't know. It seems pretty reasonable, no? Of course it seems reasonable. This is the thing, right? It's not really relevant whether it's reasonable that much a lot of times, right?

Because this is where, let me backtrack a little bit. This is where Jonah Hill screwed up from a straight straight up like he don't know how to date he's like bad at women sort of and that comes from probably like you know what i mean yeah he's like he if you're smart and you start dating a 20 you know 20 girl that's way younger than you she's a party girl she's out every night she's in the like clout chasing i don't even know if this girl was like a party girl though although because a big part i know surf culture you can't read between the lines buddy you know what surf culture means i know dude i've i've dated like the surfers skateboarders snowboarder chicks like types you know i mean like the whistler 100 i got no beef with it but the problem is if you're like you

know working 70 hours a week going on working on movies or you're busy and that if is if you're like you know working 70 hours a week going on working on movies or you're busy and that if you if you're past that stage in your life where you're partying three four nights a week you don't really want it that much around you right yeah so what you do obviously is you sort of you start dating that girl a bit and then it's like you don't make her your girlfriend and if she wants to be your girlfriend then you're kind of like yeah yeah i mean if we're gonna be like together together like i'm this is what i'm wanting but i'm also fine with this of course the problem is he's like wifed it up mad quick bringing her to the things you know putting the love bombing as they say putting the matching outfits on and then afterwards he's like

here's a list of demands she's like well i already have everything i want you got no bargaining checks pal yeah that's a good point he has no bargaining chips, pal. Yeah, that's a good point. He has no bargaining chips. What you say is just like, you don't move all, you don't give away every last chip you have with nothing in return. You kind of need to, it's a negotiation of how your relationship's gonna work. Well, I will say that the one thing that he did,

well, he brought that up before marriage, obviously, because that's when he'd be totally fucked in terms of losing half his money. That was the last thing he had. That was too late, though, because he had three more years before he could have even probably thought about that shit. Well, apparently not,

because he's got a new chick already knocked up. Well, then there you go. Maybe he was thinking about that stuff. And that's probably what a lot of guys do. And I think a lot of dudes, it's like when you're sort of saying, don't post this, don't post this, all you're really saying is like,

I don't like what's going on. And then you're trying to articulate it. So you're like, you know what I mean? Kind of a lot of times you're just like, I don't post this all you're really saying is like i don't like what's going on and then you're trying to articulate it so you're like you know i mean kind of a lot of times you're just like i don't know maybe like i don't want you posting all this shit like that all these ex-boyfriends are doing like maybe don't be hanging out with your ex but you're like trying to put a finger on yeah what you don't like i mean but really you're just like this isn't working for me yeah he's like i don't like this and he's probably just like so you're trying to put a finger on it yeah he's probably like you know i don't like it when leonardo dicaprio sends me screenshots blown up of your ass in the thong and that's not my favorite thing i can't probably articulate why i don't like

that but exactly and i'm not that guy's kind of like yeah i don't care i actually i actually don't have any problem whatsoever of dating girl that's like putting it out there i kind of like kind of like i i feel like it suits me almost yeah i mean it's like for sure like some people are into that some people are not like just he's just like i'm not super into that i'm not into that and also i mean i don't ever think i've ever heard of him having a girlfriend period well i'm also the little if she's like out there and in the scene like so much the littlest thing could screw up his image too you know what i mean yeah like he has like a that's the thing too is like he has a actual like super public image to maintain so you're like at some point now you're the girlfriend like you're like an accessory to that image so you're like he's like this is the

image i'm crafting so this is what i require simple as that yeah it's just like this is what i need of you i don't like want this is what i'm like he's like you don't think i could get some like only fans like like you don't think i get literally like i get that again he's like i get a victoria's secret model like i have 20 in the wings like waiting if i if that's what i want he's like i don't want that and then there is another part if you're looking from a guy perspective on the image if you are kind of like you know was the fat kid that turned into like you know cool be pretty cool guy now especially when he gets skinny he's got all the tattoos or whatever but like he's still got that in him a lot of people probably sort of look at it if they see him and the girl seems like she's out with other guys and

doing all this stuff and like it does a little bit people probably be like oh he's getting fucked like it's not like embarrassing is the word you use but you're just like and then i get if you're already insecure already you get extra insecure i've always said when you have and it's like you're embarrassing things though like this stuff it's not like oh people are with your friends are whispering it's like it's on the cover of people magazine sure being like your girlfriend is like palling it up with some surf she's on some guy's legs in the pool doing like a polo where she's doing like a piggyback it's on the cover of like websites and stuff you're just like it's different it's not like you he's this life's a little different yeah we're trying to

act like he's just like some normal dude who works at the ford plant who's like telling his girl like how to behave. You're like, no, it's not the same thing. But you are. He is sort of right. Not what he said. I'm just saying, because if you're a guy that is sort of insecure and whatever, what happens is you sort of just let it bubble. And then at the end of it, you go, that's it.

I'm putting my foot down. You know what I mean? Yeah. Whereas what you need is someone that's not taking advantage of you. Because if you have someone that's taking advantage of you, then you're always freaking on guard. You need to have someone that you really trust. So when you don't have that, you end up just sort of always like,

what's this? It's not a good match. No, it's not a good match. No. And again, they were in couples therapy. It's just, I don't know. And then also, she just pulled the ultimate scumbag move. Because you're just like, why?

What is this for? Well, she's a clout demon. That's what I'm saying. But you're just like now let's talk what is this for oh she's a clout demon that's what i'm saying but you're just like but she's obviously not in her mind being like i'm a clout demon in her mind she's like uh i'm trying to what warn women like she and she's like i waited till the the baby was born just because i didn't want to put all the stress like i'm sure like this new mother is like yeah this is great now this is awesome point in case like this is the kind of thing where you go, if I was with a girl that was all that sort of stuff, and I'm like, I don't know, you just seem like the type of girl that's a liability.

And then a year later, it does that. It's like, well, I guess I was right that you're a liability. For sure. But there's- And just pulled, I mean, that's like jilted lover stuff to go post all these private text messages. So obviously, it has a sore spot over this whole thing. You know how you're talking about, not every girl would do that.

I'm not saying every girl would never do that. No, most girls would not do that. I'm saying she feels specifically very wrong. He's a dork. Yeah, but also the fact that he found a new girl pretty quickly, knocked her up, had a kid. She's probably like, that should have been me. Yeah he was he probably already knew it's like a lot of times you're with someone just like you're just like i already know this is not the one you're

just like i'll throw one hail mary here's my list of things i want or whatever reasonable but people always say this is where the girl take that was driving me crazy it was like we should have just broken up with her and it was like yeah in a perfect world she should have been like i guess when she started seeing signs of controlling and doesn't like it could have should have broke up with him and when he started seeing this shit he didn't like he should have broke up with her it's like well unfortunately people don't always work like it was like the most holier than thou take of also that's like hindsight is 2020 sure like i'm sure you have to do that five times and then six time you catch it early like i'm sure when you wake up and you're tied to your fucking bed

and your chick's holding a sledgehammer about to crush your feet you're like probably should have taken that sign four years ago and broken up with her anyways people have a very holy you're out there out that attitude i mean it's armchair quarterbacking right here i know it's like yeah obviously but they only do it one way though because they i've heard so many people being like well jonah hill like should have broke up with her instead of doing this stuff and it was like and she yes and her too like yeah it's like it really is they can't decide whether they have agency or not yeah do you think he made her i wouldn't that's why i was arguing with women sometimes and they're like well you wouldn't do stuff like that and i go no i wouldn't that's correct yeah i would like but everyone's not

vegan that's not the standard of like you know what i mean for sure yeah you like i mean head on over to saudi arabia see how they feel about posting photos yeah or having instagram exactly period but yeah there is and then on top of it i don't want to totally say he's off the hook or whatever because it's like he is like he is the biggest that is the perfect hypocrisy on his part being like women should be allowed to do it everyone and in his personal life it's like literally liberal in the sheets or liberal in the streets conservative in the like imagine like leonardo dicaprio texts came out like that people were like and fucking gives a shit nobody cares right if you're just like no men should ever tell a woman what to do it's like if you're if you want to preach the women bullshit it's like well i guess live the

women like yeah like literally it's like never tell your girl anything to do ever it's like, if you want to preach the women bullshit, it's like, well, I guess live the women fucking life. Yeah, like literally it's like. Never tell your girl anything to do ever. It's like, nothing's off limits. Go have a naked pool party with your boyfriends and you shouldn't be so insecure about it. Yeah, it's like literally understood that Leonardo DiCaprio just breaks up with you once you turn like 24. And that's just like understood and we're fine with it. Because that's, you know, again, those are his boundaries. His text messages. He goes, look, this is what I need from you don't be 25 25 this is what i need from

you for this relationship to work be under 25 all this stuff's been coming out of the woodwork too they're trying to meet to him and shit now yeah i know he saw that yeah i saw that so it goes i actually watched the arnold doc yeah i haven't seen it as good i just love him man yeah he's the freaking best but it's like i just there's he's he's so um he talks about how great he is like mostly and it's like amazing like he's just like you know and i knew that no one was gonna beat me blah blah and he the things that he did bad he like he grazes over them so like he's just like even when he's like i basically cheated at the competition i told the guy it was over so he left stage it's just a little prank he was like he was really pissed off never talked to me again but you know

that's the kind of fun stuff i do he does these things he's just so i think he does live in that world it's like pathological winning stuff you're like it's like kobe bryant being like yeah when i was like at the free throw line i tied his shoes together and then yeah it's kind of that trip his ankle never played again but you know games a game no it really is it really is great stuff and it's like he very much grazes over like the how he's just uh just like smashing non-stop or whatever but the interesting thing was he when he was running for governor he had like a ton of groping girls on set allegations and all this stuff and he just basically was like i don't know i didn't do that but like

yeah i maybe acted inappropriately sorry and it just kind of like a different way that's all i was that's my whole point is kind of all i was thinking at the time was just like can you imagine like i mean louis was the last apology that was the last where people go okay that makes it worse trump had grabbing by the pussy. He dodged that. But that's why, though. It's because back in those days, people wanted accountability. Now they want blood. So it's like they say they want accountability,

but they want blood. So apologizing doesn't help. It makes it worse. Because then all it does is forever that they get to go, yeah, he even admitted it. Of course. That's all that happens. Yeah, yeah. And if you don't admit it, then it's even worse, because they're going to get you either way. Yeah, it was an interesting time for that, but yeah.

It's like someone jacked up with that much testosterone, you've got to assume they're getting in there. Right. So I think everyone was wrong about a lot of stuff. Jonah Hill at the end of the day, I think the biggest takeaway is kind of what your main point, which I agree with, is when a girl does it, it's standards. When a guy does it, it's emotional abuse. Of course.

Happens all the time. But at the end of the day, if the guy, and then my second biggest thing is if you're going to frigging try to make like a party girl, a housewife, you got to do it incrementally. You can't just go all in and then try to get your way and claw your way out of the scenario that you hate. You have to sort of boil the frog out of the party life yeah for sure but i don't think like he's he does not really he's not gonna be negatively affected by this because i think most normal people are like yeah that's like most normal people i don't think think that is that crazy i don't know yeah i think there's a lot of people that do some people do yeah and it sort of

puts you in this it just puts you in the scope now. Like how many guys are like, oh, wow. It's like a, you know, a subsection of women. The women lobby strong though.

Yeah. I agree. I was like in the, I told you, I like, I like Patrick for David. Like he just makes me laugh so much, but he's doing,

I don't think I told you this, but it's just one thing that I have not, just speaking of big famous people, I have this quote that I have not got out of my head. They were doing an episode, and he was basically, the other guy was like, you know, you're just talking about being great, and he was like, you want to compare yourself to people your own age. You know what I mean?

You're your age. You shouldn't be comparing yourself to Grant Cardone. You should be comparing to your people your own age you know what i mean like you're your age like you shouldn't be comparing yourself to like a grant cardone you should be comparing yourself to people your age you know what i mean and if you're doing this like you want to compare yourself to this like yourself seven years ago and then patrick david's like hey let's just stop for a second this example you're saying is really weird you're saying that i compare myself to grant cardone he goes no i'm just saying like that's you know an example of what you wouldn't he goes yeah except i've never compared myself to grant cardone so you like couldn't get off dude i swear the co-host was like no it's a hypothetical i'm not saying you do he goes yeah well i don't so he goes i don't know what point you're trying to make about me comparing myself to grant cardone

and he like he like couldn't it was i was like on the plane you're like are you guys gonna have to cut like you want to edit this out or something? And the guy was just like, I'm just saying hypothetically. Yeah, exactly. Because you do it right and you shouldn't. He's like, yeah, and I wouldn't. Dude, he's like fucking the best. That's funny.

He's just so matter of fact. Yeah, he's very matter of fact. That he can't like get in the hypothetical realm almost you know what i mean it's a little bit of autism i think yeah super serious just like can't understand this comparison he goes i don't understand couldn't agree yeah here's my other uh point is that meta is that one buddy that buys the same clothes as you as acts like it's normal like if you just showed up with the exact same shoes as me and you're like, what? I don't know. Yeah, we both have them.

It's like we'll wear them on different days. Oh, you have those? You're just like, yo, that's not okay. That's what Meta does with every other thing. Because first they copied YouTube by trying to add new videos and they tried to make it like, you know, in ads. Yeah, I remember that on IGTV. That was on Facebook first. Then they copied that on IGTV.

Then they go to Instagram and then they then they go to instagram and then they just buy it then instagram just copies tiktok all in all then facebook starts copying tiktok and then they just open a new one to copy twitter it's like they've never met a social media platform that they couldn't completely jack yeah i mean threads the fact that it has 100 million people on it already is impressive but it sucks it really sucks i was really like when it happened when it came out and i was like tell me i don't have another thing i gotta use please and then i think after three days i was like fucking pretty sick that i have like no compulsion to go in there and check it really well the only way i would use it is like you

know the only way i would use it if i had an app that just like posts from twitter to meta so it's of course it's threads you go i just on Twitter, and if it wants to go on the threads, then it goes on threads. Yeah, yeah, for sure. And I won't even open it. You do whatever you want there. I could be getting quote tweeted. I don't even care. I don't even know if you can do...

You can't search. There's no searching by topic. Well, do you know what the big conspiracy hypothesis was? Obviously, it's to take you know to fight elon musk and they're trying to take that take that like elon musk is a mean guy uh market space sure but the other one was that uh which isn't a conspiracy but it's like they have the biggest thing in their industry is like scraping data and selling data especially for ai and stuff like that and none of those other most of those other platforms are videos and pictures and stuff like that so now they're kind of like, hey, we're only letting words.

So now we have all this word data, which we can scrape. And that's why, because remember, they were scraping Twitter and Elon Musk was getting all mad about it. Oh, no, no. So the conspiracy that I, as I understood it, was that they basically had threads waiting to go. Then they went and started scraping Twitter like crazy in order to essentially make twitter do their like rate limiting thing where they're like we have to like put the brakes on twitter

to make twitter look bad and then as everybody's like oh look how shitty twitter is right now they're like hey everybody here's threads but they were the ones doing the scraping in order to basically that's why they did they like kneecapped twitter temporarily so that they could like it's basically release because they had it right ready to go obviously they just needed to find a point of weakness essentially so they're like yeah that that was the which is possible i don't think you can find out who is doing the scraping but uh they just know they're getting scraped again scraped yeah but uh yeah i don't know but thread sucks it's i mean again you can't like... It's just like...

Dude, all of Threads is Gillette being like, do you like antiperspirant or do you like deodorant kind of guy? Drop your comment below. And you're like, okay. Definitely a lot of fucking ads getting out there. It's like all that bullshit. Every brand's on there. It's all just like the engagement,

the type of engagement farming of just like asking questions like nobody gives a shit about just so like a lot of people answer. I hate that stuff. Kobe or Jordan? Drop the comment below. Who do you like? And then you're like, okay, what's Yeah, top

five titties. Go. Yeah. But it's from some. I hate engagement farming. Oh, that's just the worst. There's this dude in Canada. Dorkiest ass shit. Yeah, yeah. This guy who... Engagement farming,

when you don't have that much engagement, it's even more sad. Yeah, but it's... Top five movies, go. Zero responses. Yeah. Yeah, it's not... I hate that shit.

But anyways... Let's do a wacky parent article. We're going to turn over gears here, you know what I'm saying? Because you know we love these you know we all about the wacky parent articles at the boys cast i like a good it's probably it might be my favorite categories they're like you know progressive dad moms so this mom basically they're doing uh they're very like sex positive household right yeah oh yeah yeah i definitely my household is very sex positive household, right? Yeah. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Definitely my household is very sex positive.

It's just my parents weren't freaking hearing about it. You know what I'm saying? The boys were very sex positive. Yeah. We were having sex in the room whenever they left the boy. Just the dogs. No. Seven reasons your teen won't talk to you about sex or open up about their love lives. So this is a parent. There's like, listen, there's a lot of parents out there.

You're starting to realize I haven't talked to my son or daughter about who they've been boning, which is obviously a problem. Sure. You know what I mean? I ask them, I go out to my daughter. I go, how many dicks you take this year? What are you doing to them? How deep, you know, you go on it, you get it, you hit in the back of the throat.

What are we doing? We an anal. And then the girl's like, mom, I want it when she goes well this is some bullshit yeah what just talk to your mom talk to me about all the d's you're taking yeah so if you're a parent out there and you're having trouble you know having like graphic sex conversations with your teenager here's here's seven ways that you can kind of see this used to be like something where you how you can kind of lube up the topic and that's how you lube up the topic and just kind of slide it you know maybe you're not even the parent maybe you're a stepdad you know maybe your dad

the teenager's 18 and you're the 30 year old stepdad you're just the teacher at the school maybe you're just a teacher at the school you know the bus driver trying to get those sex convos sparked so the first reason that your teenagers might not want to talk to you about sex they go you haven't brought it up you know you just haven't talked about it you maybe talked about the birds and the bees when you're in seventh grade but you haven't talked about sex or sexuality since then so a part of it is that like you might have gotten scratched the surface but you haven't really like got to the nitty-gritty so your parent the kids are sort of walking around being like obviously i would love to get into the details of you know who what and how

sure but i just think you know my problem my parents are funny they don't want to get into it yeah they probably just do it through a hole how big a load you doing you know where are you putting the load your kids received the message that you don't want to talk about it so there's a possibility so they're not even potentially starting with the idea of like yet hell no the kids who obviously don't want anything to do with that yeah what kind of psychopath wants to talk to their mom and dad about sex when they're literally just be like yo don't get pregnant don't get someone pregnant that's it i remember my buddy his dad used to always say fucking make sure you double wrap it i was like like always it was this thing that he would always say and it was like

pretty well known at the time that that's not a good advice you know what i mean double wrapping is not good advice no because it breaks it's way more likely to break because they rub together right you know that yeah everyone knows that never double bagged it well you do it never even single bagged it i'm a dog the dorito rapper never even single bagged that is funny imagine the kid like double bags and then gets a chick pregnant yeah dad nah he goes well you should have tripled i told you i got fun paying alimony kid yeah just like your pops so no kid probably wants to talk to, but their thing is that there's kids walking around

like freaking parents won't even ask me about my sex life. You know what I mean? So I would say that that one's the first one. Probably not. Try something like, hey, I know I haven't talked to you much about your sexuality, but I want to start. That's a nightmare of a day, huh?

See, I think what I would do is I would, if you're really into it, sexuality but i want to start that's a that's a nightmare of a day huh see i think i think i would what i would do is i would if you're really into it is i would plant like uh like a fleshlight or like a dildo or like a butt plug like and then your son's goes what's this and you go funny you should ask yeah see you gotta just start the conversation got some pamphlets here it's a little icebreaker as they say hey i'm gonna hey come in here this i'm gonna me and your dad are gonna show you something something we've been working on open up to page 67 of the conversation you're gonna want to stretch first you know you those are some tough you're gonna want to stretch first very advanced position, yeah. Just grab my stepping stool here. I got to get up here to the bar.

Okay, son, do you mind help tying me into these ski boots? Then you clink the ski. You basically have skis taped to the ceiling. You have the zero gravity boots, basically. And then those are on the wall, and then you're sort of hanging down. And dad's on the stepping stool next. He goes, oh, I forgot to take my Viagra. And then he's like, I'm stuck.

Oh, no. Blood's all going to my head. Son, it's an emergency. I need you to go into the top drawer of your room. That's where I left it. I assume you might want some too. Assume they might want to start. You go, listen,

I want to start. This is something your mom and dad want. It might make me a little nervous because my parents didn't talk to me about it, but I'm not freaked out by sex, and I'm not going to shame you. It's your dad sitting you down. Listen, Danny, this is something that we're talking about. Now, listen, I'm going to be a bit nervous. You might life your dad sitting you down listen danny this is something we're

talking about now listen i'm gonna be a bit nervous you might see your dad jittering this is something not something my dad talked this starts now this is the generation that it starts we break the chains this is when we break the chains also it feels nice if you uh wrap a chain around your neck right before you're about to finish. But don't do it unsupervised. This is where we wrap a chain. This is what happened to David Carradine. His dad... You know what happens is,

the kid goes, his dad, his kid goes, help, help, help. He walks in, he's naked jerking off at the belt. He goes, help. And the kid walks in, he goes, dad, he goes,

see that was just a lesson. That's the type of things that can happen if you do this unsupervised oh that was funny nice little wholesome lesson right there wholesome lesson now you try

he's got the kids he's got a maple leaves tie pop your tie on there Now you try. He's got the kids. He's got a Maple Leafs tie. Pop your tie in there. You haven't even taught me how to tie a knot yet. That's second. Hey, one thing at a time, okay? No, you're teaching your kid how to tie a knot, but it's under the belt.

That's how you teach your kid how to tie a tie. Now listen. I know I might be freaked freaked out i might say something like this ah don't let that stop you from getting into the details every last detail do not miss a drop i want to know what's your name the guy's like dad i just i fingered one girl i'm fucking i fingered one girl i think i got pretty sure i don't know And the dad's like, which finger? Pull it out. Yeah. How many? One?

You can ask me anything. And if I don't have a good answer, I'll find it for you. The kid's like, I have the internet. Literally. Your dad's like, I know nothing about sex. I'm not an expert. You're like, how do I finish quick? He's like, do not move.

Dude, don't move. Am I? but you're like how do i finish quick he's like one do not move like dude no dude don't move am i i don't know if i'm just like so vanilla but like how much stuff is there to really know like honestly like oh you're good point yeah how much stuff are we talking moves because the only thing there's really no you're not sure yeah that's what i'm saying that's up to you you and whatever i'm not talking about moves with my dad we're talking about procreation essentially like this is pretty straightforward stuff i'm not sure what they with my dad. Yeah, we're talking about procreation, essentially. This is pretty straightforward stuff. I'm not sure what they want you to talk about. What would the questions

be? What is a teenager's question? How do I stop busting so quick, dad? And the dad's going to be like, if I had the answer to that one, I wouldn't be with your mother. Yeah, you're like, double bag it. I'll tell you one thing. If I had the answer to that one, you wouldn't be here, son.

Yeah, I'm like, I just don't understand how much stuff there is to be imparting. What are the questions? I don't know. How do you unzip pants? Yeah. I honestly don't. Do you face each other? Lube?

You're right. The only thing you could really be asking is like positions. Yeah. You're just like literally like, hey, this, this. It's kind of what you do. That's it. That's literally all there is to it. You go, hey, I don't know.

Like, what do I do if I can't get it up from nerves? And your dad just like runs to the other room. Siri, what can I do? He's going gonna google if he doesn't have the answer oh yeah i don't know sometimes it happens hit the bricks dad again you're like is there even an answer there's not really good like if you're like you know is there if your dad's gonna tell you old wives tales like picture your grandma you're like how's that supposed to help you like i like, I can't get it up. Reverse psychology. You can't get your dick up. You picture your grandmother.

You picture your mother. That's what I do. If you're trying to, what do you do if you're going to buzz too quick? You go, what I do is I picture your mother. I suggest you do the same. What? Well, I just look at your mother. I stop imagining someone else, and then I open my eyes and look at your mother. So I suggest pict at your mother If I'm coming to I stop imagining someone else

And then I open my eyes And look at your mother So I suggest picturing your mother There you go Solid advice How long to eat for I guess That's how long we're munching for Yeah he's like

Yeah I guess I stopped munching a long time ago Maybe like food you want to eat beforehand You know like Tips for athletes Like you know you're going to want to have some protein This is all the stuff that like Some like creepy adult said to you like this trying to be cool they got a pineapple in there make it taste good and you're like get the fuck out of here

creeper playing mini sticks it's just unnecessary seven there's not seven hanging around the skate park you know what i mean telling you sex tips so definitely i i'm not interested personally in having those conversations no and then they go um another option they say watching tv and movies together can be a great time to bring stuff up yeah for instance hardcore porn oh you've obviously the first thing yeah you go your mom just keeps picking movies with sex scenes have you ever watched a sex scene with your parent is obviously the most being incredibly embarrassing yeah it's the worst thing ever i have the right i'll just up and leave you know i'm out of there i'll just tell me when it's done the only way to handle it is to make it like funny where you're just like

not doing this okay you tell me when this is over you perverts this is perverts putting on for us yeah so when the kid gets up your advice is you grab them be like sit down you watch you have any questions yeah yeah and then like they're like no i think i'm good you go you need to have some questions i don't know why you wouldn't have questions so ask me ask me anything you don't trust old papa bear and it's not your dad it's your mom too so your mom and the mom's like a by the way like trust old papa bear and it's not your dad it's your mom too so your mom and the mom's like a by the way like super progressive mom oh so it's like your mom and she's a blogger exactly so you're like anything you say is going to be used against you in this

format you're going to be winding up like she's like do you have any questions and she's taking notes you go why are you taking notes if i'm asking you questions. She's got the recorder on. She goes, just pretend this isn't here. One of the top questions that you have about sex that's happening right now. Why are there three men? Interesting question. That's a video that I picked. I was hoping that you'd ask that. I don't know.

Why is... She cuts her own sex scenes in with the dad and the mom. Why are you and mom in this movie? That's the eligible bachelors. What was it? The rich bachelors. My buddy's dad.

The rich bachelors. My buddy's stepdad. I've said this story on the podcast before, but it was a while ago. My buddy's stepdad started acting. Oh, yeah. I got troubleshooting and then basically he didn't tell his mom that he got a job as the spokesperson for sugardaddies.com she just fucking saw it on the tv was he like in a hot tub or tub with a bunch of girls. This guy's a 60-year-old Indian man. He's in a hot tub with six girls.

This woman blew a fucking gasket. She honestly wasn't putting it together that it was like, she wasn't putting it together that it was just an acting role either. You know what I mean? Oh, that's insane. That's really crazy. She's like, not only are you freaking out, you're rubbing it in my face. That was back. That was back.

That was back. That must have been a while ago, right? Oh, it was like 20 years ago. Yeah, that was in the days when they're like casting for this and they go, you know who we need for a sugar daddy role? A 60 year old Indian man. Who do they have now? I don't know.

It would be something like the opposite of probably what a sugar, I don't know. They would do like, they'd be dancing around it. It would be probably a woman. Like a fucking super hot woman. You go, this doesn't make any sense. And they go, yep, we're not getting in trouble for it. But I think this one was pitching to the guys, right? Yeah, I know.

Yeah. That's who they think their target demographic is. It's probably not that crazy far off. Please open. Please open. Please open, but locally. Please open, but in person person please open the hot tub and then she goes for instance if a guy aggressively kisses a woman who tries pushing

him away share your thoughts and say geez this guy is aggressive so her basically way she wants to open up about sex but she doesn't want to open up about sex she wants to open up about like shouldn't do that yeah yeah it's like that's not the kind of questions that the kid has. Yeah, exactly. The dude. Yeah. The girl has questions.

Probably the guy has questions about like, how do I get this? Yeah. Yeah. Guys are just like, how do I make, how do I get rid of the demons inside of me? How do I make this happen for me?

How do I, how do I do that? You know what I mean? And the girl is going to set, you know, and then the girls, I don't know what her questions would be like frigging. I don't know.

Something stupid. How long do I wait? Maybe. Yeah. How do I know who's right? How do I know who's right? There's the one. I don't know what girls frigging think.

And the mom's probably like, you want to just be a fucking huge whore. Yeah. I'm not. There's no such thing as the one. You just want to just get ran through. There's the one and two and three and the ten. Just get ran through get ran that's fucking this week yeah you just hey listen there's nothing wrong with getting run through

you know you know your mom before you met your dad tried every other guy in the book same night you know it's it's nothing wrong with um having sex with your stepbrother you're not blood it's it's it feels weird but that's what yeah so mom's gonna give her just wacky ass advice you know what i mean and the son yeah it's probably like the son she was like you need to be careful you get like everything you do not you know you do not uh make a move unless you have explicit permission daughter take them all there's no you go whoever you need whenever you need yeah you get on that life is your oyster men are palmer horses and it's your time to ride save a horse ride the ride the hockey team

watching tv can be a break uh great way to great way to talk about that yeah so it's npc mom two you've shamed and judged others so one of the reasons is she's saying that maybe your kids don't want to talk to you because you've been like oh that guy's look at that little slut and then what her suggestion is is that you apologize for that and then come back to the daughter and be like listen i noticed you haven't talked about banging lately i think it's because i call that girl a slut just want to say she's not a slut i was wrong so now that we've got that out of the way yeah tell me about your escap so now that we've got that out of the way yeah tell me about your escapades now that we've gotten that out of the way hold on hold on hold on she pours herself

a drink lights a cigarette okay now i'm not falling for this one yeah let me know so maybe she does yeah um then the daughter goes uh the dad's like yeah listen listen i might have said some other girls are sluts i want you to tell daddy what you've been doing she's like, yeah, listen, listen, I might have said some other girls are sluts. I want you to tell daddy what you've been doing. She's like, I blew the whole hockey team. He goes, what? You're going to fucking boarding school. He said you wouldn't judge me. Going to the monastery tomorrow. There's one big hockey player that's from Newfoundland and he kicks around.

Yeah. He like went back home and he was, I can't remember the guy's name, but he went back home and he was i can't remember the guy's name but he went back home and he's like a big celebrity there right yeah and apparently i think i know who uh the guy who like he's not he's retired right oh fuck i think he was in letter kenny maybe he's like yeah yeah i can't remember the guy's name but basically paul was saying that sometimes it'd be like a girl and someone would be like oh that girl you're talking to oh she's so smashed so and so that hockey player smashed her but they're not saying it like they're not telling you it's like a badge honor yeah they're not telling you the hockey player smashed

it in a way to say like we just so you know she's smashing all those guys they're saying like good enough for him i get in there yeah it's like a big badge of honor that's who it is! Yeah, yeah, Terry Ryan. No, it's not Terry Ryan. It's Terry something. Terry something. I know who you're talking about. That is who it is. Yeah, yeah. And he's a big badge of honor. It's kind of like Bubbles from Trailer Park Boys just moved to the East Coast, or just

lives in Halifax, and he's just running through the chicks over there. Yeah. What's his name? It's definitely Terry something. Danny knew what he was talking about. I can't remember. So the other ones, you've been too nosy in the past. So it's like, you have to be just right if you want to.

You can't be too nosy. It's like, if you want your kids to be telling you every last little detail about their sex lives, you've got to be just right. And then the last one, the kid just doesn't care about sex, they say, right? So you have to be just the right amount of nosy, right? So the first one, you have to kind of be like,

listen, they go, tell me who? He goes, listen, I don't need to know every last detail but like did he hit it you know and i want you to open up just as much you want and the last one the kids might not be interested in sex yet so it's like you've been asking them too young so you have to check in like sort of every morning you just wake up your mom's like right outside you're right in your face with a pen and badge because yet you have a wet dream yet uh pitching a tent there pal quick second here to tell you about patreon.com slash the

boys cast where there's a new bonus episode every week and we are also under 200 away from doing our next episode of our series bug man versus bug man and listen he

also got a come see me on tour we got Salt Lake City coming up very soon July 21st New York City is very close to sold out September 16th at a theater Tacoma, Vancouver,

Kansas City, Omaha, Edmonton, Los Angeles, Irvine, San Jose, Phoenix, Toronto. So get those tickets quick. Now we would be doing a disservice to our listeners if we did not tell them about AG1 because this is something that I do every single day. Me too. It's the first thing I do when I wake up. I wake up, go to the bathroom, walk to the kitchen, make myself an AG1. I told you I've been popping ice cubes in there, mainly because my tap doesn't get cold enough as well.

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try AG1 and get a free one-year supply of vitamin D and free AG1 travel packs with your first purchase. To support the show, go to drinkag1.com slash boyscast. Go to drinkag1.com slash boyscast. That's drinkag1.com slash boyscast. Check it out. Fucking dorks Ben and Jerry have been out at it again. Yeah, they have. Actually, this one was pretty funny, though, because they were basically saying

that they got to give back Mount Rushmore to Native Land. Yeah. And then essentially their Ben and Jerry headquarters is also on native land and they're like give back your ben and jerry headquarters i mean based on their logic all land is native land yeah i don't know what so every production facility that ben and jerry's owns is on native land it's all based on this premise it's all on these guys never met like a hot new you know social justice trend that they didn't love no There's nothing they couldn't sink their teeth right into

immediately. These guys just sit on, like, every day, just finding a new thing that they go, oh, we can be aggressive about, we can be, like, completely over the top about that one. Yeah, they don't like, uh, Israel? Not fans of the Israelis? Okay, so there's a bit of stuff in the affirmative action

category. There's some funny shit. But one is there's this dude on Twitter. I don't think I've, I don't think I sent you this, actually. You can see there's this guy. You probably saw this. It was just a huge thing. But Jay. Yeah, of course.

Okay, so this guy basically said, serious question for well-meaning white people. When you show up at a get-together like this, do you notice that there's no black people? If you do, do you say something? To who? Please be honest. This is a safe space, blah, blah, blah. Unless you say something racist. So they're saying, they're like do uh uh you know like internet

lunatics they go to an event and there's not any black people there and they're like what do we do sure do we call like a jennifer aniston and courtney cox are there and i the first thing you're thinking of when you show up is you go there's no black people here but their brains are fried right and they go it could be like it's even if it's like a family gathering you know what i mean it's like they're i think that what these people need is sort of like rent a black guy like that feels like there's good service that black guys can rent like if you're like a progressive and you're like you want to seem cultured could they but you don't know enough black people you like can rent you know like rent a like minority so they come to your party and make it seem like you have you know what i mean

yeah you know what i mean like kind of like but as a as a social like not obviously working there like they have to pretend like oh i've known like they have all backstory that exactly and like so it's like rent a friend college buddy 100 so you basically have these guys and they show up and they kind of uh make it seem like yeah me and old the brickish i'll go way back exactly right but the reason why it's funny is so this guy posted this and then the next day it basically people did a deep dive on this stuff and it said this guy basically lied about being black to get into law school. Well, not only that, he lied. He did a fake hate crime, too. He faked a hate crime like 10 years ago where he was in, when he was in school,

like in 2012 or something, he basically reported that he was like attacked for being black. This guy's a real Sean King, eh? Yeah, and then maybe they investigated it and then he eventually admitted, he goes, yeah, nothing actually happened. I just did it to bring awareness to the stuff.

Like that's what they all say. Yeah. What percentage of hate crimes do you think are like, what do you call it? Red? Like fake? Yeah. But what's the word for the fake?

Like when the government does a bombing on their own citizen or whatever. Oh, false flag. Yeah. What percentage do you think? Like the ones I do or just, you know, what percentage of those were you just, what percentage do you think? Like the ones I do? Or just... What percentage of those were you just joshing?

Like the Jussie Smollett? Like 40%? Is it like 20% or do you think it's like 90%? Probably closer to 20%. I don't think it's 90%. But there's not that many people out there trying like swastikas all over the place. That's not true.

There's a lot of people like... I feel like every day there's someone posting like, oh, another, like, you know, some guy wrote the N-word on the walls or whatever. That's a hate crime? Yeah, that's the kind of stuff that counts, yeah. But what if you don't know who wrote, like, the color of the person who wrote it? But they never don't have to.

They just assume. Oh. That's what I'm saying. Oh, you're right. If you include actual where there was, like, physical crime. Yeah, I'm talking about a hate crime, like a crime of violence or whatever. Probably less.

Like a Jesse Smollett. I mean, there was in the last week in the Bronx or wherever you see the guy driving around shooting people randomly. I didn't see that. On a scooter. It's pretty crazy on the weekend. What? This guy had a ghost gun.

Like one of those ones that you print yourself, I guess. I think that's what they said it was. And he was on a scooter, like one of those ones you print yourself, I guess. I think that's what they said it was. And he was on a scooter, like one of those e-scooters that all the delivery people. And he's just driving around the Bronx, just total strangers. Lighten it up. But he's not a white guy, so not a hate crime. You don't hear about that too much? Oh, I mean, it was in the news, but it's just like, they don't, you're like, that's not,

even though they're just like, okay, that can't be a hate crime or whatever. So like, I don't know, but I'm like, I'm sure he didn't like those people. It's hard to trust any of those stats because they're just like okay that can't be a hate crime uh-huh or whatever so like i don't know but i'm like i'm sure he didn't like those people it's hard to trust any of those stats because they're all so politicized like even with the like you know go shooting up like a supermarket full of black people like that thing in buffalo you're like probably a hate crime well there's that guy that's kind of blowing the whistle one of the big tactics they use is they'll have like five guys that went and do something and they make sure to prosecute them all as like different cases so they can say it's like five separate like crimes or whatever and then they can be like it'll be like a domestic terrorist thing right and then they'll be like look it was 17 domestic terrorist

things but it was like all just really it was all one yeah yeah it was like one conspiracy but they like separate them or something they separate them to pad the numbers and stuff like that that was some guys were kind of blowing the whistle on that whole thing yeah but i don't like yeah i don't know about it like do hate crimes exist sure i don't think there's a lot of them yeah a lot of crime there you go yeah a lot of i mean a lot of crime in toronto actually a lot of shipping going down there what do you mean shipping no shit i've been going down you see like that dude got stabbed on the subway there i did see that pretty crazy and then the woman and queen and carla right by the old corner got uh randomly like these three guys were just like in some altercation she was like walking home from lunch she got shot and killed that's freaking out of

control i just shooting a woman for no reason well i think they're just like she was like a total that's like the total final destination shit right there where she's just like walking to go grab like a fucking timmy's or something and just like catches a stray catching a stray just like all right that's it for you oh he's come easy go but i will say on the on the affirmative action stuff it is a little bit like don't hate the player hate the game you know what i mean yeah because there's this guy there's an indian dude right and he got into medical school by pretending he's black i mean how do you not almost you know and that's why i was almost like that was funny because my note that i have for this is don't hate the player hate the game you can't hate the game you know

what i mean of course it really isn't like we have that's what we were saying for acting it's like the guy that's like you know you basically like a service that can be like oh they need non-binary we can get your gender changed like you need this we'll give you like we have a chief swear you in like like a service that can just give you a little something something of whatever you need to get the position yeah that's like uh i can't remember the college i think it was brown college or some like good institution like a college and recently came out that like 40 of the students there identify as lgbt and you're like well at some point it's negatively affecting you to not do that of course like at some point someone's like looking around like you're a chick

and you're just like there's no like i can be lgbt like i that's easy it's so easy like you're every single girl in college like 80 of girls in college could say yeah i'm lgbt and if you're just like a white chick you're like fuck this is really i'll kiss one girl yeah sure but they don't even ask right it's just like yeah you're so but like the whole thing is you're like this is actually causing me a problem to not do this so then everybody's like okay well then i guess we're all lgbt and we're going to reset this whole thing that was my favorite thing at cbc when i had to fill out all the diversity reports and say who's gay and who's not and just like filling it out with people's names saying they're gay i can't like just putting paul's name on there or something then send him the form you like i already filled out half of it then he signs his app and then he's just like

agent calls him 10 minutes later to be like i booked you a tv show i was what i didn't even audition he goes i know just like i just wanted you real michael scott situation you guys all right, who's gay? A catering guy? I already got you. Wardrobe? Gotcha. Listen, I don't need you.

Yeah. So this Indian dude is just so funny because, obviously, to the conclusion, where you basically have one campus, it's just all black people,. And it's just like all Indian dudes being like, my brother, my brother. What is up, my brother? All you do is shave your head. If you got dark skin, you just shave your head. You just make sure you don't grow any of the hair.

Although his name was like Raj or like Suresh or something. It's like, yeah, Suresh. It's my African brother. What is happening? Yeah. How good is that what is happening my guy i'm my gay so i was loving the idea of just all the indian bros on campus taking like going in for the black spots he did it in 1998 too so it's like a cautionary tale though said

he had like a 3.1 gpa but then also what this indian guy said is he did it to get in because obviously he was like his parents probably want him to go to good school or whatever and then so he did it to get in and then once he got in he was like yeah it was way too hard yeah i'm crappy at school that's what he said so then he's like and then i failed and so then like that spot got taken away from someone who deserved it so he did it he goes i felt bad about it like that's the kind of takeaways i don't do this yeah you don't got to make the same mistakes that I did. But also that he's just like, if someone else in a similar position with a similarly bad GPA, he's like, you're not doing them any favor.

You don't want to go too high up. You know what I mean? You might want a family friend to pull some strings to get you to play on the team just above, but you don't want to go two teams just above because now you're going to be getting screwed. Again, you're like eight teens you're probably like when they put it they when someone like you know it's like when they weasel someone onto a comedy show that like they weren't really ready for and then they just get freaking you know destroyed yeah because it's like i guess you yeah you got the spot but it's like then what you know yeah that's what one of our bodies always

said he goes you always hear these people being like, oh, I booked this festival, this festival. He goes, you never really hear how they did. You don't hear too much about how the set went. Yeah. The only thing that you hear about is that they can't air that, which I've heard a lot of that. That's like a huge thing you hear about in Canada is, is people doing these like galas and you go, yeah,

they couldn't air it. I've heard that 20 times, literally stories like a jfl gala and they go yeah went real bad but it's everyone getting the spots it's just all these it's just like a bunch of indian guys acting gay and black my brother oh it is me. I am the queen. Here's my N-word. Everyone's like, but there's no black people on the campus to see it. Yeah, because they're, they took all the spots.

And there's another one which this woman, she goes, she questions if it's a red flag because her 40-year-old husband has been in college for 20 years. And this bro,

he's an aboriginal dude from Australia. And they basically have a thing where if you're Aboriginal, and Canada has some versions of this and some other places have this, but it's like you get big grants, right? So college is free and then they give you money on top of that for res and whatever. Oh, this one's so funny. So this dude's getting 40 grand a year.

He's going on his like 19th degree right now at this point. Year 20. He's year 20. So this guy's the ultimate van wilder too probably tuning up the young fucking college kids do so this guy's he's doing his fifth degree right now and he just gets 40 grand a year yeah if you remember how college is even more i think actually they said they're all these other like there's never been an easier life than imagine your college can't your college and probably somewhere like that it's probably sitting around like you know you know 10k a year or something like that you know what i mean then

your residence is like another 10 so he's just like basically on top of everything he's sitting there with like 25 30k no free money after no he doesn't have expenses because that's the thing is he lives like with his wife i'm including tuition or whatever no they probably just give him tuition and then they're paying him on top right i think he's like clearing 30 no 40 or like more or whatever and he doesn't pay tuition oh he doesn't pay that's what i'm saying he's not he's not paying tuition he's not paying anything plus he gets you're right sorry my bad yeah yeah so you're just getting 40 grand a year he's like making a living on top of yeah and you have somewhere to yes and all you got to do is pass right because exactly because if you're doing badly they go yeah he's disadvantaged obviously

what do you think he's just gonna come in and get straight a's he's disadvantaged and she's explained how his current job position is that i have a college student he's been attending for the past two decades the issue is she's worried of how other people will view him i mean i feel like dudes would view that as like fucking beat the game yeah it's a guy who beat the system and that's the thing he so and like a big piece of context here is that he uh there's like these slots that are available and he keeps getting them because nobody else is applying for them so he's not even like taking away from somebody yeah because some people on the thing were kind of saying like well he's taking away from people and blah blah it's like well then change thing. So he can't do 19 degrees.

But he's not taking away from anybody. Cause it's specifically for Aborigine. And like, there's just like some years he's the only person who applies for it. So he's like legitimately not taking anything away. We have this money. It's available. Whoever wants to take it.

Like it's, I don't know what happens if nobody takes it, but I'd love to have this guy in the podcast. He sounds like the goat, dude. He's like 20th degree on the gun, the doll. He's probably super smart. Well, who knows if he's smart or...

I mean, he's very well read, I'll tell you that much. But how many introductory degrees do you have to take? Some of them share so many of the same courses, too. The guy's probably taking his... I'll tell you one thing. I did stats, then i i switched from uh business to like math economics if you remember yeah and then uh one of the things was i had to take a different stat like they basically have different stats so i had to take a different

stats which is kind of the same stats and i got 100 on it yeah it's my second time taking i got 100 in the course i didn't get a single question wrong right on the wrong on the two uh two things it was my first time i already did pretty good but the second time i got 100 can you imagine the fifth time oh you had to take one of those credits where it's like bullshit sociology class you're basically taking sociology the fifth time and it's multiple choice scantron questions though there's only so many departments and so many classes this guy's just running his way through every single department yeah i mean i guess you're just doing different degrees you're doing like four years of a sociologist but that's the thing yeah you're right because like in a sociology degree a philosophy degree huge overlap they all have tons of overlap but they won't yeah you basically

some of them they like you can't transfer the credits but a lot of times people had to take the same course essentially twice but there's a different version of it that's funny right because they have like math stats and then they had like business stats you You know what I mean? Yeah. So technically it's different, but it's like not. And I was already good at it to begin with. So it's like, yeah, you beat the game sort of. Yeah.

This guy's a goat. I mean, this guy's... Love this guy. Love this guy, yeah. He's winning. Yeah, so I guess maybe we'll hate him if we saw what he's posting or stuff like that.

But on paper, we like him. I think he's like a total indoctrinated college kid. At 40? This guy might be a fucking piece of work for all we know. You know what fucking a couple years of college does to someone

imagine what 40 student years does to someone this guy's brain might be fried into it I mean he hasn't chopped his dick off

so there's something surprised he hasn't chopped his dick off I know the fourth agreed adding so yeah there were people that were

sort of the girl goes despite not having an issue with it she obviously doesn't like it because I can imagine why a girl, she's going to a normal job and this guy's back to school again. Four months off every summer. This guy's living.

Oh, yeah. Surf life, dude. She probably hates that. Surf life. But pays the bills, man. Surf life. Do you think he gets a part-time job in the summer? Like a real college kid? No. I don't think he gets a Do you think he gets a part time job in the summer Like a real college kid

No I don't think he does shit I think this guy is cruising my man The last Well not the last but the probably legend Of the week which we should probably Probably mention The legend of the week is the guy who died during his affair With the

The nurse at the week is the guy who died during his affair with the nurse at the hospital. So this guy, basically as cool as you could get. And we were actually looking at, me and Tony were looking up, is there a list of guys that died during sex and do like a montage of legends? I mean, that's a lot of guys have gone out that way. Totally. I don't know. There's some probably famous ones.

Because you're too old to be banging, right? So you go... Sometimes you're too old to be banging. Sometimes it's just like... I was doing a joke about this. The girl doesn't know to call the cops because she just thinks you're coming weird. Just take it easy.

Well, this chick was trying to cover her ass. I know. She didn't call the cops. But I mean, I'm sure there's like a... Dude, if you're an old guy pulling nurses and got the nurse to wheel him out to her car he wasn't old he was like 40 yeah i guess he just had some crazy he was like on dialysis he had some like crazy like uh kidney condition or something pimpitis and then yeah and then he just started smashing the nurse and then fucking croaked mid smash and the opposite of that what was your uh the hockey thing when the

guy died on the ice guy died on the ice everyone ran over people like thought it was a joke at first then people start freaking pumping them trying to do everything kind of no one knew what to do and basically went over to the like thing everyone's kind of standing and the the ambulance like takes him away and then we get word that that he's died on arrival kind of thing. And everyone's just in the dressing room. And then everyone's sitting there silently. And then one guy cracked a beer and stands up. And he goes, hey, boys, no better place to go, right?

And everyone just looked at him like, buddy. I feel like that was sex, though. You go, no better way to go, huh? But that actually is no way to better play to go. This wasn't the best way to go, huh? But that actually is no way to better play to go. This wasn't the best way to go. 45 years old in a recreational hockey game at 3 p.m. on a frigging Sunday. This guy's got like a frigging four-year-old kid. The thing was, this guy was just out of shape.

I think you start to, you know, you got to kind of get into shape a little bit before you get, you know, oh, let me just start recreational basketball back up. And it's like kind of, I mean, that's why, that's why shoveling snow kills so many people because it's like, sure you're out of shape and then you just go do this thing and then you just die. Your heart's like, yeah, I can't do this. And I could see that. Oh yeah.

So let's talk a little bit before we go about, okay. Did you want your husband's special relationship or a chat GPT guy? It's Danny's choice. DLA's choice. Your husband's special relationship. We'll do chat GPT on the page. My husband and his buddy's got a special relationship and the kids are catching on.

Gist of the story is she married a gay guy. Yeah. But it is pretty funny she's like not it's not like the gay guy where you go like i realized he was gay and then we just kind of like for the kids stay together it's legitimately like me and you just boned every time we hung out yeah that's kind of what it is but like the chicks know she's like into it she's like yeah i'm like he's like he just needs to like blow off steam blow off steam and fuck His body and like I'm cool with it and like our Relationship is great but like the kids are catching

On the kids are like those guys Are hanging around a lot he always comes back tired Do you know how to do it My husband and I have been married for 25 years And we were together for five years before that We got four adult kids the youngest Moved to college and from Time from the time things got serious,

he was very open about the fact he occasionally hooks up with his male friend, Charlie. That's a crazy way to, like, and he goes, it was a take it or leave it situation. I don't know how you'd even propose that. I guess nowadays it'd be a little easier. But 20 years being like,

listen, I love you, baby. There's something you got to know. Me and Charlie, we hit the golf course. You know, we bone, okay? Capisce? easier but 20 years being like listen i love you baby there's something you got to know me and charlie we hit the golf course you know we bone okay capisce this is gonna be a take it or leave it there's gonna be no changes charlie i don't love him like i love you you know this is just a dude it's just a hole i see him as nothing more than a hole this is something i need what i need to keep the demons at bay okay so he's just one of he's literally like he's probably like look if you want to choose to break up our family over this yeah if you're gonna be a baby about it if i can't

oh i can't suck off charlie once or twice a week it's not a big deal charlie he's clean you like charlie it's just so funny because it really is he's presenting it like no it's not he's not in love with charlie yeah he just likes to smash he's not gay charlie from time to time yes the boys get together they go on trips yeah maybe it's like. He's not in love with Charlie. Yeah. He just likes to smash Charlie from time to time. Yes, the boys get together. They go on trips. Yeah, maybe it's like, if you were there, maybe I'd smash you. But it's Charlie's, you know, sitting on the bed. It's like, okay, I don't know.

Let's give it a spin. Take it for a spin. We don't even like it the whole time. It's like, if you're not around and Charlie's around, I guess. We don't even like it. It's like, oh, fine. You want to hit the dinner? All right, boys.

All right, lights out. we got an early game tomorrow hitting this hitting the hitting the dungeon so to speak take it or leave it situation i occasionally pursue casual relationships with other men so this guy's i guess he is pretty gay yeah and he's like yes do whatever you want i just wanted to have kids with you you are a baby making machine that's all you'll ever be you're a bleeding demon and you'll never be anything more than that so a lot of times here's the problem charlie and his husband work together they do work together and they both used to travel a lot it sounds like a lot of these travel trips didn't happen it's like they work at the hardware store, and they're like, we're out of hammers. Like, oh, we have to go get some in San Diego. Got to go straight to the mill where they make them.

Oh, yeah. We're at a screws on the back thing. I think we're going to have to head over to San Francisco to pick some up. They got the best deals there. We're also going to have to take Charlie's motorcycle. Yeah. And then they used to travel a lot for work. So a lot of times we would have sex

and they would be during the business trips and occasionally before it would be here and there at Charlie's place before he's married. So Charlie's married too. The four of them sounds like they know each other and hang out. So it's a real weird situation they got going on here.

That's an odd one. Now they're empty nesters. They work less, so they have to just go on normal trips. They have more of their fun trips, and the kids are starting to be like, hey, obviously dad's gay, right? Yeah. Well, they just kind of know that all their friends' parents don't do that.

Yeah, but they don't seem to do that why are they always changing together why yeah why don't totally turn in his freaking ass into a chocolate factory why is there always shit everywhere yeah i honestly didn't think they'd notice but our but our uh 21 year old daughter said hey where's dad said he was on the golf trip she goes they spend a lot of time together. It's like they're married. And then mom goes, no, they aren't. They are not married. I'm married.

He's just a hole. That's all he'll ever be. He's nothing more than that. How, like, does this end when, just like, what, when they die? Like, are those dudes, like, they're going to be banging it out until they die? Probably gets a lot grosser when you're fucking 72.

You know what I mean? That's what I'm saying, though. You have enough to only bang your wife, let alone save some for Charlie. That's what I'm saying. Like, is this just indefinite? I don't know. But props to Charlie. Props to the legend of the month who died during sex, the true king.

Catch me. No better way to go out, huh, boys? No better way to go out, eh? And this has been The Boys Cast. Yay, yay.