The Boyscast with Ryan Long - MORE WOMEN IN SUMO WRESTLING

Starting point is 00:00:00 And you can tell our friends, and they can have my things when we're dead But we don't end forever, but we don't end forever The Boyscast, the official podcast of the boys Boys, boys, boys, boys, boys, boys, boys, boys, boys Daniel Poloschuk, Ryan Long, and Matt Villigdon just sent us this One of the boys on the Patreon Nice You ready for it? Yep Accidentally four boys Matt Villigdon just sent us this. One of the boys on the Patreon. Nice.

Starting point is 00:00:25 You ready for it? Yep. Accidentally for boys. That's weird. The girl comes up, she goes, listen, girls, you should not be opening car doors for the boys. They can open, for girls, they can open their own car doors. They're perfectly capable.

Starting point is 00:00:45 Accidentally for boys. Girls can carry in their own groceries Just as good as men can Accidentally four boys Hey You and your friends Were gonna go out And me and the girls Were gonna come

Starting point is 00:00:55 But we're all boycotting the event So it's just gonna be you And the fucking guys there Accidentally four boys Anyway That's That was funny Woo Great Yeah we just got back Accidentally four boys Anyway That's funny Woo

Starting point is 00:01:05 Great Yeah we just got back The tour dates were fucking sick Chicago was sold out Which was awesome Because you know Everyone's yelling at you online Like I'm not gonna

Starting point is 00:01:15 Freaking come And then you go Well good you can't Because it's sold out So Sorry Chicagoites Okay so You know

Starting point is 00:01:24 On the way here I don't know if You've been seeing this lately But we talked about Transgender people Yes Girl to guy Back to girl

Starting point is 00:01:31 Girl to guy And they go I'm for trans Accidentally for the boys That's the thing You have to ask If it's an even number Or an odd number trans

Starting point is 00:01:41 To find out What their new gender is Yeah yeah Where we're at But I've been seeing we talked about on the podcast that okay everyone's uh they there's all these articles being like everyone's wearing dresses right now right the guys you know it was the met gala every

Starting point is 00:01:56 guy goes oh wacky i'm wearing a dress well that was the met gala was everyone was wearing a dress but even before that we did an article where they were like basically their their premise was uh dudes are all wearing dresses now and that's you know that's the future of thing right which basically is back to saudi arabia accidentally poor boys but um on the way here i saw two different guys back to back wearing dresses. Now, like a sundress or just like a skirt? One of each. Oh.

Starting point is 00:02:31 One was a straight up wacky nightgown-y style dress, like flowing in the wind, frolicking type of dress, right? And then the other one was like a jean situation with some buttons on it. Hmm. Yes. Weird to be making that move in October that seems like more of a July well that's what they were sort of saying it's the summer of boys and dresses what I'm saying it's the middle of October already well yeah no for sure this is not

Starting point is 00:02:56 the time for it but I mean I didn't follow them and ask them these guys could have been on the trend all summer now oh right right yeah they're not just kidding well I don't know who these two guys were cool cool guys moral of the story is they're just fucking sick no but this is the thing it's like yeah they were but they were both also flamboyantly gay so it's like no it's not men are wearing dresses it's gay dudes wear dresses now oh yeah yeah i i didn't even think

Starting point is 00:03:26 that was like i thought you when you're saying i saw two guys wear dresses you're like there's two straight guys wearing dresses i've seen no gay guys wearing dresses well back to back is funny though legitimately back to back yeah yeah that's but it's just so funny because the articles they go it like oh men are wearing dresses and it's like well no gay men are wearing dresses it's like it's like you're making a fucking our saudi listeners right now are just literally like they just fucking smash their phone they're like we're not all gay okay but it's just sort of the thing i say before where it's like the equivalent of saying men wear do regs and it was like well yeah very specific type of man yeah well they don't want a cool man yeah a very specific type of cool man but so playboy um and by the way we're recording this

Starting point is 00:04:12 a few days earlier because we're going on tour for a week again yeah so we might be a little late to the punch on a couple things we're usually fairly timely can i actually say one yes we're talking about cool men yeah is we were in this bar no we're in this bar in chicago on saturday night after the show i don't know if you remember this but there was this guy there the there was so you probably i'm with you so far so there's this guy at the bar by himself he was dressed like he was out of the 60s and all his stuff oh remember that all his stuff was like he he was by himself and he's just sitting there,

Starting point is 00:04:46 just staring into the distance. Reading Nietzsche. Yeah, and he had like his luggage was like, he had like this like suitcase thing, but it was like obviously all like from the 60s, right? Well, he looked like a caricature of a human being. He honestly looked like the bar paid him as like ambiance or whatever.

Starting point is 00:05:06 He's just like chilling there. He looked cool as shit, but shit he looked the only thing he was missing was smoking a cigarette and i was laughing a long cigarette like a long cigarette and it was like he was that looked like he was like a he's a black guy he looked like he was at like a jazz bar in the 60s he looked cool as shit but the best my favorite thing was i was the only one who found this funny this guy is fucking just like dopey dude in like a cubs jersey walks over to him who's just like this guy's just like drunk and he goes they start talking he goes hey where do you get your clothes like this guy's gonna start dressing like this guy all of a sudden like you're wearing a fucking cubs jersey in a bar like i'm not even like a like a knockoff like chinese one he goes

Starting point is 00:05:37 hey where do you get your clothes from the guy's like i get them from a vintage store and he goes i could be i could run that well that's what I've been saying on stage lately is that when you're a guy, once you hit 30, you go, that's your image. Yeah. It's very difficult

Starting point is 00:05:51 for you at 30, like 35 years old to be like, maybe I go Western. Yeah, but you better at least be dressing trendy as is as some kind of trend.

Starting point is 00:06:00 You're not going to get super. You're not going Cubs jersey, stained Cubs jersey at the bar to fucking. Well, yeah. I'm going to go cool. It's Cubs jersey at the bar to fucking. Well, yeah. I'm going to go cool. It's you showing up with some look like that.

Starting point is 00:06:08 Yeah, exactly. And you go, what the fuck? Well, they had, yeah. So speaking of men. Yeah. Also speaking. You know, he originally said speaking of men. So also speaking of men.

Starting point is 00:06:19 Cool men. The, this is just a small thing, but like, so Playboy has been over the years basically telling their audience to eat a dick. You know what I mean? Well, I think it's that and also they're just like, what are we? Well, what happened was they did an article on their online, just like anywhere else. 2015, Playboy, like any other magazine, was doing worse. They transitioned online. They did an article like women should be great.

Starting point is 00:06:47 It went viral from people that don't even watch Playboy. And they kind of leaned the fuck into that. This is us now. But now they've leaned in so hard where they have a guy on the cover of Playboy, right? A gay guy. Of course, he's a gay guy, right? Yeah. But it was just that, the only i think playboy

Starting point is 00:07:06 is hoping to do is go viral and get back in the news or whatever right but to me i was just loving so much the the like the old guy oh yeah who was a playboy guy oh me too and he goes he goes to the like the convenience store and he goes you know what i haven't had a good wink in a while convenience store and he goes you know what i haven't had a good wink in a while or orders the new edition he just orders online the new edition of playboy yeah he opens he brings it to the bathroom gets ready to spank it because his wife's in the kitchen making food he sneaks it in there opens it up what the fuck i know well remember because back he's calling them complaining uh yeah i was just about to jerk off and uh yeah i don't know if it's a mistake but there's a you sent me the play girl yeah i think there's a typo here but they have you think hugh hefner envisioned playboy 2021 just gay men on the cover

Starting point is 00:07:57 hey half is this how you saw this going yeah he died right yeah he's dead oh talk about killing a legacy no no he died at the perfect time like saw this going? Yeah, he died, right? Yeah, he's dead. Oh, talk about a killing a legacy. No, no, he died at the perfect time. Like, he died at the absolute, because he died, and then the magazine started doing four-word. I forgot that he died. Yeah, he died,

Starting point is 00:08:13 the magazine started doing, like, Hugh Hefner, the guy who, like, you know, had 90 girlfriends, all Playboy Playmates, like, the fucking height of, like, you know, this Playboy dude. Like, the term playboy yes you might

Starting point is 00:08:27 say he was somewhat of a playboy somewhat of a playboy yeah okay and then now he's just like yeah let's just slap some gay dudes on the cover dude i was just fucking dying because the only people that actually probably buy that hard copy are there's no 70 no they don't exist so they're all that's because i was well you still might the only guys that are maybe even go to the website to spank to playboy well that's i guess none of them do because they're 70 and they're just like you know how are you supposed to compete with pornhub if you're playboy for sure impossible like it's one of those things where it's almost like playboy went trans where

Starting point is 00:09:03 they're like the whole brand is like you know where we're like it's a transition they're a trans brand we're transitioning to a new because they put it last year they put a trans woman on the cover and they go this is the first trans person on a playboy sure right and then even you know the guys who were like i can let this slide yeah this is okay fine there's still titties still titties and there's still women in the rest of the issue but the dudes just dress up like a girl yeah they're like how much can i take you're not even hiding it now it's a straight up a dude's tits now i wish though that they had the physical copies because you know they used to send them to you you didn't get it wasn't a playboy. It was in a paper bag, because they had to conceal it.

Starting point is 00:09:46 Yeah, that's what I love. It was an unmarked package. An unmarked package. You're doing this really naughty thing. Now it's extra naughty. Dude, Playboys, eventually, you just open it up, and it's just two guys jacking each other off. Know what it is?

Starting point is 00:10:01 It's just a zip fucking throbbing cock throughboy magazine 20 like 40 is just a ziploc bag full of a man's cum you're so whatever where's the magazine what is this it's just a bunch of cum yeah so enjoy it you fucking bigot yeah holy shit and but the also like play girl they had one that was for girls so if you're into if you're gay you would already watch or a woman yeah or gay or but yeah you would already have one and it's called play girl yeah they had a so now they're like so play girls or is play girl gonna be uh chicks now so basically just switch them just like trans men or something yeah no but just it'll trans like play girl which is supposed to be for the guys it's just going to be like a chick wearing over wearing a man's outfit yeah just like some a chick with like a tool belt some super hot

Starting point is 00:10:58 chick and some old guy calls out because i'd like to cancel my prescription subscription to play boy and i'd like a subscription to play girl please now that's what i mean i don't know what's going on over there but i guess i like play girl yeah so they basically uh they just they switched it where you but some other guy has to be like oh i guess i'm jerking off to play girl oh fuck so stupid so funny but okay so uh well actually you know what's kind of funny is that um so i was when we were kids there was this guy his name was salisbury and he had he was this dude and his dad had like this crazy collection of porn right okay and we didn't he was one grade

Starting point is 00:11:43 older and we used to always go to his house and try to like go in the garage when they were there and look at the porn and then one time we went to it was funny we all brought like nine of us with our skateboards we knocked on the door he came the door we go hey uh you want to come skateboard and he was like yeah i mean i don't know you guys and i don't skateboard and we're like can we see your porn i just remember being like get the fuck out of here i mean that used to be a big thing ah shit i never saw i know a lot of people have been like the porn in the woods thing i never found porn in the woods i know a lot of people we know are like that's how you that's a cliche almost a cliche but i remember hearing that i go

Starting point is 00:12:19 all these people like yeah i found porn in the woods and where i used to live there was a wooded area but definitely wasn't ever finding porn around no you never but if you did find porn you know you went to go buy porn that was just a guy's wood nice accidentally for accidentally for the boys james wood could we get a nice bending guitar the uh so superman's gay now right um saw that on the top that was today yes superman's gay well i know again so that was today but it's gonna be in a couple days you think regular superman's like i have no son like it's like like it'd be funny if the angle is your superman's gay superman because superman jr i know at least they did that they go it's not superman superman jr

Starting point is 00:13:02 but then it'd be funny if like superman didn't approve of it at all, because he's a real old school 50s dude. Right, yeah. Because obviously they go, son, I accept you. I'm not coming to the wedding. Funny angle. It goes, I have no son. Yeah, you see Superman is just searching on the internet for fucking pray away the gay

Starting point is 00:13:24 camps. Or like whenever he comes home for Thanksgiving and Superman's like, Superwoman's here. Superwoman decided to show up. He's like, dad, I'm Superman. He wakes up to getting flown to Mike Pence's church where they pray away. By the way fucking we know a guy

Starting point is 00:13:45 who went to pray with a gay camp right fucking JC best yeah yeah yeah right and he said a lot of it

Starting point is 00:13:53 is yelling at pillows and stuff so a lot of it is and then having gay sex at night no they no they didn't really do that

Starting point is 00:14:00 I thought he said he was like smashing no I think that might have been a joke but I think a lot of them was like it's the the don't be gay camps when you're

Starting point is 00:14:07 like when they send it to 15 year olds. That's kind of what happens. But this is like an adult. I have a wife and a kid. You're like, you're like, this is like this isn't my parents send me here. They're like, no, this is I have a wife and kids. I actually can't be gay. I'm checking myself into rehab.

Starting point is 00:14:23 Yeah, this is this is serious right no more cum and butthole no more freaking fun at all so yeah they basically he said it's a lot of screaming at your pillow like because they find out you maybe you're gay because your dad so you pretend the pillow's your dad and you go i ah, ah, ah. I wonder if they ever go. It's a rage room. A lot of not being gay is like a rage room.

Starting point is 00:14:48 it's like a rage room. Just go smash a bunch of plates. I wonder if it ever comes back to you. You go, you know who's made me gay? God. I'm going to pretend God's the pillow. And they go,

Starting point is 00:14:56 no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no,

Starting point is 00:15:04 no, no, no, don't blame god no god's on your team buddy but uh so but also it said that he's so they went full out where they said that he's like um he's uh what was the thing they said he's trying to uh like stop climate change then yeah he's all the things. Yeah, yeah, he's all the things. I guess I saw someone saying that Superman did fight the Klan or something in the 60s. So maybe that'll be the one thing that him and his dad can bond over. Right, right, right. He's tight and...

Starting point is 00:15:39 No whites. And no whites. And fighting the Klan. So I found probably... There's two funny headlines in a row they both stuffed their package or they got huge hogs well then he fucking has a nice piece yeah so he has to be a uh uh he has to be a receiver because he has two he's packing too much heat to be a take imagine you're fucking superman in the ass the only thing that could kill him is kryptonite

Starting point is 00:15:59 there's two in a row the the first the first one's just i'm just gonna tell you a funny headline that i saw after a year of trying to be a single dad, I'm finally pregnant again. So it's just good, awesome, funny stuff. Yeah, yeah. But this is probably, someone sent me this, and it was an actual paper in a university, and this is probably one of the funniest things

Starting point is 00:16:18 I've ever seen. It goes, Japan's sacred sumo and the exclusion of women. I saw that. And the idea. exclusion of women. I saw that. And the idea... It's a lecture. It's on October 20th. We can actually watch it. Oh, fuck.

Starting point is 00:16:30 If we went to it? No, we can't. I guess we could go to it. I think it's in the UK. Maybe not. But yeah, I think it's in the UK. But we can watch it for sure. I bet we could ask questions too.

Starting point is 00:16:40 I bet there'll be like a Q&A session where we go, hey, so... Do you think the problem where do you find fat enough pigs yeah yeah you go you go what do you think the issue is are the girls just not fat enough are they too fat also i look you know it's a weird thing by the way in this because you sent me this link and so there like, I guess they're doing another lecture that's unrelated to it, but it's like, as you scroll down, it's called Whales of Power.

Starting point is 00:17:10 And I go, whales of power and female, I'm like, what the fuck? Whales of Power. If you click it, like if you look at the link, it says, it's like hf.io slash whatever blah blah slash English slash research. Tell me it's fact, girls. Slash whales of power, but it's like unrelated to this. But I go, I'm like, man, you're calling them whales of power. But who are they calling whales of power?

Starting point is 00:17:29 I think it's actually about whales. I think it's about whales. But then they also have a sumo thing that's unrelated. But they just had a back to back to back because it's in the link. It says whales of power. I'd like you go. Yeah, yeah. That'd be good to ask questions.

Starting point is 00:17:42 You go there and you go. So were you inspired to do this to try to get your mom a job? I'm here with Danny and him and his mom want to sign up for this. Do they go topless, you think? Oh, that's a good point. Do they have to wear a big onesie like earthquake and typhoon? Yeah. Like, did they go exactly?

Starting point is 00:18:02 Is it earthquake and typhoon? Me and Waldo went home with these two girls once and we always say that we went home with earthquake and typhoon if you're listening to this pause your pause the fucking uh phone and look up a picture of earthquake and typhoon tag team duo earthquake and typhoon but it basically this is one of those things where i would make that video and be like we need more women sumo wrestlers right well that's the thing you go listen there's a girl out there right now you know a mini honey boo-boo and she knows that she'll never be able to be a fat fucking whale in a ring pushing someone out of a thing it's a tough life though being a fucking sumo wrestler like so much eating well so much no but it's like they the way they have like their camps and stuff and it's like they

Starting point is 00:18:53 have to just like they train all this like it's like they're almost like they're treated like not i want to say animals but it's like no no no you're off on that they're like high class they're high class but like to get to that point. Oh, you're saying the lower guys. They just put them in a trough. It's like really grueling training. Really? Yeah. Well, you would know. It was tough for you? It was tough for me.

Starting point is 00:19:16 I couldn't eat all the fucking food. You go in there. I couldn't eat all the gruel. Yeah. They said, in a guest lecture, this Lindsay DeWitt Pratt, a post-doctoral fellow at the grant university so this is what she's doing she already has her doctor but now she's working on this whole sumo project by the way this goes back to what we were saying last week about how useless college is for so many people that's correct whereas if you this

Starting point is 00:19:41 is this is what's called sunk cost right here okay so you'll learn this in economics if you, this is what's called sunk cost right here. Okay. So you'll learn this in economics if you actually spend your money well. So you basically go get this useless fucking education and you go, oh, I got to keep going because I spent all this money. On the 100 G's deep. 200 G's if she's doing this nonsense. And then she gets like an internship and she's like, what do I do? And they go, oh, why aren't there enough women in sumo? I'm going to spend the next two years.

Starting point is 00:20:04 Researching this. Probably just like, you know, rinse some fucking foundation for some grant money so you can be like, I'm going to research why there aren't women in sumo. It's so funny. She says they will give you the rich cultural history of the sumo wrestler.

Starting point is 00:20:18 The Japan Sumo Association, a quasi-governmental corporation, so it's sumo sort of socialized. It's kind of like the Olympics, you know what I mean, where you kind of work for the government almost. I think, yeah, it is. Champions itself, a custodian of a divine affair cultivated by male deities and mortal men

Starting point is 00:20:36 and exclusivity of women. And the funny part was the author wasn't that fat either. No, she's pretty... Which is even funnier, you know what I mean? She's like, she's just pretty which is even funnier you know what i mean she's like she's going around to other fat girls and being like you have fucking the fact that you can't be a sumo wrestler it's like a sketchy did kind of but it's like she probably has like a like a little board and it says like why aren't there women in and then a wheel of words this was straight up the wheel spinning and landed on sumo wrestling.

Starting point is 00:21:06 Why aren't the women in sumo? Okay. The next two years of my life dedicated to this? To writing this wrong? That's the thing. We need a girl fat bastard. That's the thing. Girls always switch to do the gender swap to the good characters.

Starting point is 00:21:22 But you never see any polling for like, we need a female fat bastard. Also, Japanese women are like... We need a female penguin. Japanese know also like japanese women we need a female penguin japanese women are like pretty slight that's true japanese men are pretty slight they're getting like the serious outliers for the sumo yeah there's probably not a lot of girls that are at that way like japanese women are like the whole thing is they're all like yeah we're all like small we're not a fucking america a country of obese people we fatten up certain people to compete in this thing and it's tough and it's tough but they're like we don't have a bunch of people who look like sumo wrestlers walking around do you know what i was thinking about the body positivity movement that's kind of funny

Starting point is 00:21:57 is so if you take these let's say a 600 pound guy 600 pound girl and their thing is kind of like hey like we're just as hot or whatever it's like okay so when you masturbate do you do that to someone else the 700 pounds like is that you know i mean like if you're if you're a 700 pound guy being like body positivity is everything do you only like when you fucking look up porn are you only looking up other 700 pound people look if you're a girl like you say you're this six you know those six 800 pound girls or whatever where they're my whole yeah exactly yeah and the whole their whole thing is how hot i am actually if anything i'm just as hot right yeah when they think of a guy that's like they're fantasizing about a guy are they picturing another person

Starting point is 00:22:43 their size yeah like is it brad pitt or is it john pinnett or guy, are they picturing another person their size? Yeah, like is it Brad Pitt or is it John Panette or something? Exactly. Are they picturing John Panette? Isn't that sort of, you know? Yeah. No. Right? But I guess there's nothing wrong with that.

Starting point is 00:22:59 Well, exactly. Why are they, you know, why is it only one way? Why don't you think that's so hot either? I mean, the most important thing is that GQ and all those women's magazines think that that is the height of beauty. Sumo. That's sumo. Do you know what I was, I was saying this to you on the plane, but because there's all those things where they go.

Starting point is 00:23:23 But it'd be funny actually if they can't find sumo wrestlers in Japan, but then they just be like you know what we'll do we'll just find all the new female models in america yeah big enough it's just all fucking like all this vanity yeah like all those magazines that are like glamour magazines just like some 600 pound chick on the cover yeah so you go to the sumo match and it's all japanese guys white women from wisconsin and then they go in america she's a model and they're like yeah yeah yeah yeah look at this fucking cover of magazines but um they were with uh the plane seats the one of the things that was because you know how they always say, oh, if men had kids, abortion would be not an issue or whatever. It would be so much legal. Which maybe there's some truth to that, but I was kind of also going through some of the other scenarios where you're like, or, because imagine, still really it's 50-50 with women too, right? Where they're really against it.

Starting point is 00:24:22 So there would still be that, right? too, right? Where they're really against it. So there would still be that, right? But how funny would it be if you're in charge, and then you're as a man, and you got to weaponize it, where you get pregnant, and then your chick's there, but you're dating a chick that really wants

Starting point is 00:24:35 to have a baby, like a Christian girl, and you're just like, you know what? Go get me some sandwich. She goes, I don't want to. You go, oh, it's called the abortion place. Imagine that. You go, she's like, do not kill my baby you go oh it depends on what are you gonna do for me like you know what i mean like i'm sure there's chicks you probably do that where the guy really wants and they're just like i don't know and i would love to be able to do that where the girl goes she goes oh i don't want to do anything i go i'm feeling like a back rub i'm a you know if you want to just come over and give me that and you go no

Starting point is 00:25:08 it's like okay what's that um hey dr kevorkian keborshian keborshian just call an uber to the fucking abortion clinic yeah so i don't know if that's exactly true but they say but i'll tell you there probably are some things that are like that and And, but the other way around, I was saying as a person that's six foot three every time, um, cause me and Danny were on the plane and we sat in the runway for five, five hours, which we'll talk about in one second, but because the Southwest thing,

Starting point is 00:25:38 but if, if women were the same size as men, they would, planes would not be that cramped there are so many things that they're very cramped and that's because if women were our size that would not be the case that's my that i'm positing that um yeah probably if everybody was out they would complain so much that yeah also men have more money so then they can afford the upgrades to the more legroom seats as well no i guess but i honestly think that women have a more powerful lobby in general especially with stuff like this like comfort and they're just better at complaining they're better

Starting point is 00:26:16 at yeah well yeah they would be focused on that problem so i really do think that if women were our size you know on average the plane seats would be suit would be more suited to what their body is i agree that's yeah there's a fucking hate spending even a minute more on an airplane than i have to yeah it's hell so the other thing was the um this i don't know if you've heard this but this kind of relates to the superman thing but have you heard the term shiro's journey uh no but i can kind of assume what it is so when they do the gender swaps right what do you mean gender swaps like they do you know where it's like a like a superman's a girl or whatever it is right so i heard this i think it was that nerdotic guy or something but he said i i think the term like people are saying harris does mike pence to kamala harris count

Starting point is 00:27:08 uh yes yeah but they just described it the better than i've ever heard so the normal hero's journey is in a you know the in the simplest way possible is what movies have been based on is like the guy gets called to do something he basically turns it down at first ends up doing it then he has to learn something about himself and then he grows as a person where he's kind of different afterwards and he was able to accomplish this thing you know the you know the most classic versions of he was not paying attention to his kids and only doing work and then at the end he realizes family's he realizes something about himself or she or whatever right yeah the new version where it's the girls the new version is the character starts out awesome but everyone else doesn't realize they're awesome so the everyone else tells them they're not awesome and then for

Starting point is 00:28:01 a moment they start to believe they're not awesome and then at the end they realize they were awesome and everyone else realizes so in the new movie the other people the periphery characters learn the lesson interesting i also thought there isn't that accurate it'd be like it's also like there's an element where it's like it's just men's fault well yeah but sometimes i'm awesome and men are saying it could be you know the other white girl that's a bully or whatever, right? Yeah. But the gist is in the old version of storytelling, which is biblical and kind of one of those almost universal truths to some whatever, that's the whole young stuff or whatever, right? But the difference is instead of you learning,

Starting point is 00:28:40 the protagonist doesn't learn the lessons, all of the antagonists learn the lessons and the protagonist realizes they actually were awesome all along yeah isn't that funny sounds great it's kind of what happened though

Starting point is 00:28:56 sounds great okay so this southwest thing let's talk about this for a second so we were on the plane we were flying southwest though So this Southwest thing. Yeah. Let's talk about this for a second. Yeah. So we were on the plane for like- We were flying Southwest though. No, but-

Starting point is 00:29:10 We were flying Delta. So this is what basically in a nutshell, what happened was everyone's saying that because everyone's quitting because of COVID. No, no, no, no, no. So the Southwest thing that's happening is over the weekend, today's Monday, but you'll be listening, but whatever.

Starting point is 00:29:26 So who knows? Maybe this will be cleared up by then. But so on the weekend, they canceled like 30% of all their flights. They canceled 2,000 flights this weekend. And they said it was because of weather. And they go, because of weather and some like FAA controller issues, they didn't have enough control. It didn't make any sense.

Starting point is 00:29:42 Because none of the other airlines had these issues. It wasn't even raining either place we were florida had like a three hour weather thing in somewhere in jacksonville on saturday but it's like there's other airlines that fly all out of jet blue not nobody had any of these issues right so uh southwest is has had something where their union was basically saying like we will not be forced to get the covid vaccine southwest gave an ultimatum that by like sometime in november everybody who hasn't received the vaccine is going to be fired right so so southwest said it had nothing to do with that at all but apparently what's happening is that all these uh employees pilots all this stuff have sick days

Starting point is 00:30:22 saved up that they're planning to get fired so they're like we have to use up all our sick days nice right they just have all these sick days that's kind of the prevailing theory at the moment is that they have all these sick days and that they need to use them up and so they're just they're just like and there must be some sort of coordinated thing too even though it's like they're saying it's not where they'll be like we're just gonna use all our sick days up and that's what's happening so like we were thankfully we're not flying southwest uh to go to texas or whatever because i was looking at it but it's uh yeah yeah the wildest stuff is but it could happen to other airlines too yeah the fire and people and you know

Starting point is 00:31:00 the just the idea of if you thought airline, like Southwest being like, you know how you thought airlines sucked before? Well, guess what? Now the good news is the guy who's handling your bags is vaccinated. The bad news is he's never done this before. Like, hey, you remember how fucking flight attendants can barely know what they're doing to begin with? And now it's going to be a guy who's never even been on a plane before and southwest prides themselves on like we're like we're the best airline in america and they have all these and now everyone's they're fucking everybody over well this this extends to other airlines because again i don't know what the

Starting point is 00:31:41 like remember we had the fucking base pilot when we went to Cincinnati. I know. So there's probably a lot of base pilots. Yeah, there's a lot of base pilots. Yeah, there's a lot of base pilots. This guy was fed up. Yeah, and so I guess a lot of them are getting fed up and they go like,

Starting point is 00:31:54 look, we don't need to be vaccinated to fly a plane. It makes no sense. They're like, we're not even contacted. We're in a locked cockpit. Yeah. So they're like, let us fucking... And they're just, you know, as I guess more of a pr thing but well these airlines they you know you can't just find pilots of course not yeah it's

Starting point is 00:32:11 not like hey uh like they're not gonna be like a job fair where they're fucking just gonna hire a thousand new pilots put it out on craigslist you know what's a weird thing too is which is a real predicament in america is that like because if you ever fly in like Asia and stuff, they're all American pilots. Like they like, and I had a friend in high school who was Canadian and they did that study. That was in a book where the American pilots are better because, uh,

Starting point is 00:32:35 in that culture. Yeah. But also people do not. Yeah. Yeah. And freaking out. Freaking out. Right.

Starting point is 00:32:41 But also like, there's just this thing where people are just like, they want, I don't know what it is, but they just like people want you know like they can't import like they're importing software fucking engineers like coders be like oh we'll just take a thousand pilots from india like people for whatever reason i don't know if it's the training or whatever but like they can't do that why why is so and i guess the reason is and this is kind of like the same shit that happens with uh on the internet and stuff like that, is these companies are sort of held hostage by the government because they get these massive fucking bailouts and subsidies and stuff like that.

Starting point is 00:33:15 So they got to play ball with what they people want. I don't even know if it's that because I don't think the government forced them. No, they don't force them. But like here, it's the same thing of like you know i'll just walk this way and if you happen to get there it's like oh hey uh everyone who wants this kajillion dollar subsidy or you know bailouts when you know however much gazillion dollars these places got yeah uh kajillion per kajillion trillion gazillion whatever but then they kind of say like well unless you don't if you don't i mean it's up to

Starting point is 00:33:46 you you don't have to take it you know what i mean yeah so it's like you know it's it's coercion not uh there's also an element too where it's like uh other airlines start you know they get ahead of you and they go the first so american goes okay we're doing everybody vaccinated and then united's like we're gonna have everybody vaccinated and then you're like well we're not gonna be the only airline that's not doing that like you don't want to be like the one air you kind of do because then you do but i don't really think you want talent but when you're public like a public company they're like you don't want that scrutiny being like fucking like dude you know how much shit like a airline's gonna take for being like oh we don't care about i know

Starting point is 00:34:21 like people are like already like locked in plane. They're nervous about that stuff. Dude, so many people were like, I'm not flying the airline. So then they force it. And then all these employees realize, especially at an airline, they're like, we can fucking shut down this whole thing. Dude, things are getting wild. I know. In fucking Australia, the guy.

Starting point is 00:34:39 That was crazy. Me and Danny were watching this video. Got too long to play. But this dude is kind of going around the internet but he basically uh the people showed up at his house yeah the cops showed up from like the covid cops yeah the covid cops and they showed up in his house with a picture they pull out an envelope and they have a picture of him at a protest and they go this you a picture of a facebook post yeah from six months ago and they go is this you? A picture of a Facebook post from six months ago

Starting point is 00:35:06 and they go, is this you? Did you leave your house to go outside? Did you leave your house six months ago to go to this protest? All units,

Starting point is 00:35:13 all units on board right now. We all have to report. We have a six month old Facebook post. A certain John Thompson was out enjoying the weather and we cannot have that it's the nuttiest stuff it's crazy well in europe and he goes was this you and he goes i don't remember

Starting point is 00:35:31 they go was this and he goes and then he's like well if this is a black lives matter protest which was happening two weeks have you gone into any of their houses and they're like and they're like it's like when you can't caught i catch like a parent in a thing and they go, it's not about that. It's about this. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then in Europe, they fucking- Say that again? I knew. I didn't think that was going to slide.

Starting point is 00:35:52 Who's up? In Europe, this fucking dude. Do you see the speech stuff that's happening in Germany? YouTube comments, do your thing. In Germany, at 6 a.m. September 8th, the German Twitter user paul zo was awoken to six police officers demanding access to his home they were there to gather evidence for a criminal investigation what potential crime prompted this calling the

Starting point is 00:36:17 interior and sports minister for the city of hamburg dick on Twitter. Dude, six officers. And you know, it's like Germany, their whole thing is they're so sensitive about being Nazis. But can you imagine when you go busting into someone's house with six people and in the middle of the night, because it's something he posted and then being like, no, we're making sure you're not a Nazi. Yeah, totally.

Starting point is 00:36:44 No, no, no, we're the good guys. We're making sure you're not a Nazi. Yeah, totally. No, no, no. We're the good guys. We're making sure you're not. But they actually had that with one. There was another one where they go in Germany, September, a French court. So this one's a French court. Find an activist, 10,000, for depicting President Emmanuel Macron as Hitler. That wasn't Germany.

Starting point is 00:37:04 That wasn't Germany. That wasn't Germany. But it is like with Germany, it's like they're legitimately going to people's houses, routing them up, and then they're being like, well, just making sure that you're not a Nazi. Not a Nazi.

Starting point is 00:37:14 We don't want to say anything bad. It's also just like you don't want to say anything bad about government officials. Yeah. You're not even like, hey, we're here because, not that this is acceptable anyway,

Starting point is 00:37:26 but they're like, oh, you called a citizen. And you're like, oh, don't criticize the government. We're here. And you go, hmm. I know. How have I seen this before?

Starting point is 00:37:37 They said in Germany, police searched more than 80 dwellings. They seized smartphones and laptops while 96 subjects were questioned about hateful posts and including insulting a female politician dude if they got oh wait i didn't know it was a well if that's fair no i'm sorry right oh okay fuck that i take back everything i said good work go fucking put him in the gulags fuck that guy i don't say shit about a female politician that's you know how hard her life has been? I want to apologize.

Starting point is 00:38:05 First off, she's like a minister of sport, which is like mostly men. That's a tough gig. Can you imagine if your group chats leaked to these people? Oh, my God. You'd be fucking done, bud. I mean, I fully expect our friends in Canada to be like, this is the six months from now being like, oh, dude, they found out about our group chats.

Starting point is 00:38:23 Oh, my God. We're going to both get extradited back to Canada. Like, this is the six months from now being like, oh, dude, they found out about our group chats. Oh, my God. So it is. We're going to both get extradited back to Canada. We're like a piercer fucking in cuffs. No, we have to be. What do you call it? Like the Edwards Snowden and those people. Oh, we're like not refugees.

Starting point is 00:38:38 Not refugees. But, you know, when you take asylum. Yeah, asylum. Yeah. We're going to seek asylum in Cuba. We have to seek asylum in Cuba. It's like, what happened? We weren't nice.

Starting point is 00:38:48 We weren't nice in our group chat. We were calling people fat. We said a female comedian wasn't funny. Holy shit. Dude, it's legitimately the nice police. Yeah. All units reporting. Daniel Polshek just called someone a hoser in his group chat.

Starting point is 00:39:09 Dude. Get him. That's what they're. So anyways, this stuff is getting, it's getting wacky out there, folks. Yeah, it's. We need a wacky world soundtrack. Wacky world. So one of the funny things that was making me laugh was so because

Starting point is 00:39:27 this is all this online world to some degree even though it's reality but like our boy in toronto who's like a gangster dude like gangster black dude we were talking about this stuff in our group chat and his like the level that his problems are so different like just some like hood dude who we know from comedy hilarious right he goes and people were like oh this and that the vaccine and he was like yeah i fucking i know i had a bad day too i got a knife fight in traffic right yeah so we're we're all talking about this like you know cover bullshit or whatever and he was like oh yeah i'm with my you know he's our age he's got like a 28 year like, you know, COVID bullshit or whatever. And he was like, oh yeah, I'm with my, you know,

Starting point is 00:40:05 he's our age. He's got like a 28 year old daughter. You know what I mean? He's like, I'm in traffic. And he goes, I got in a fight with this guy. And then I pulled it out.

Starting point is 00:40:14 And then this guy pulled a knife out. So he took it. So I went to block him and then he cut my finger. So finger got almost cut off. So he's like, so bullshit. I'm in the ER right now. And we're just like,

Starting point is 00:40:23 yeah, it's crazy that there's vax passports, right? The funny thing is, he's like, why does this always happen to me? Yeah, yeah. Why does this happen to anybody else? He goes, I don't know. We're all talking about some fucking bullshit. Even just like chick shit.

Starting point is 00:40:41 Someone's like, I got to go fucking do this. He's like, you think that's bad? I got stabbed five minutes ago i know he sends a photo just a knife i know and then the other side of it that we were laughing about is our buddy who's like a straight-up communist we are we're i was fucking dying this weekend because me and danny had forgot about this forever but he was boasting about all of these shit being like you know landlords or tenants shouldn't have to pay their rent and blah blah and danny pointing out he goes you're a landlord it was on i did his podcast and he's like basically him and like he's like

Starting point is 00:41:16 a socialist and the other guy's like a communist this is like last year yeah like right in the like in march of last year or whatever and in any words because that was when people were like, oh, what's going to happen? How are you going to pay your rent? Nobody's working. And then he's like, yeah, people shouldn't have to pay your rent. And I'm like, yeah, you're a landlord. You honestly have a tenant. Can he stop paying?

Starting point is 00:41:35 Can he stop paying his rent? And he goes, eh, change the subject. Probably prefer if he pays. Yeah, I prefer if he pays. How funny is that, though? Getting to the point where. I mean, it's tough being. It's like the Hassan Piker thing where it's like,'s tough being like a socialist and like you're like i want my brand

Starting point is 00:41:49 to be a socialist slash maybe even communist if we get there and then you're like yeah but i have a bunch of money sure but you might just put it in like something else to put it in actual like property so you could be legitimate a rent seeker yes that one seems tough right yeah yeah it's not like you're like funding a fucking comedy uh improv co-op and he lives somewhere else yeah takes and i know what he i know his deal where he pays he's legitimately charging you know more than his mortgage and all that stuff because he bought it a while ago. And then he lives with roommates to make money from his investment property. Shrewd. Some might say like a true bourgeoisie.

Starting point is 00:42:31 Yeah, like a true capitalist. Okay. Take a minute here to tell you about our sponsor, Fitbod. Now, if you don't know what Fitbod is. I don't. You got to check. Yeah, yeah. Danny doesn't. I do. I don't. You got to check. Yeah, yeah. Danny doesn't.

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Starting point is 00:44:37 but a lot of people messaged me and said we should talk about it. And I think that, and what I'm talking about is the Dave Chappelle's new special. And one of the things that is good about, you know, the reason why these things are good is because it's such a big deal. And it's like a microcosm of the whole world through comedy. So it's kind of interesting. Yeah, kind of. Yeah. For us, it's a lot of. Yeah.

Starting point is 00:45:00 And, you know, so Chappelle, I have, I i've always he's not particularly my favorite and he dave chapelle has the in comedy it's very much like don't speak the lord's name in vain the goat he's the goat self-proclaimed the goat i've basically said that uh so dave chapelle to to comedians is what bo Burnham is to bloggers. Like he could do almost anything and every comedian was like, my mind got blown, bro. So maybe it is even my bit of a hipster thing. But I think it's just my sensibilities that it wasn't my thing.

Starting point is 00:45:40 Because I remember even Waldo, he said he went to the Chappelle show and he didn't really like it. And he kind of has the same sensibilities to me to some degree. So what's your stance? Are you a bigpelle guy i like chapelle yeah i like chapelle some of the best shows some of the best uh stand-up live stand-up shows i've seen are from him but i will say that the special was okay well they said this is what the and he did do 14 specials yeah he's not 14 i don't think of his, those recent six are like, again, it's, you know, like a musician or anything. Like the best stuff I've seen from him was 15 years ago. He's really like leaned into the, like, I'm the philosopher king, you know?

Starting point is 00:46:18 I was in love with the idea that, so he wrote Kim Kardashian's monologue for SNL. And I was loving the idea of her starting the monologue with let's get serious for a second let me tell you how it is and then she takes off her lab mic and slaps it on her knee she's like she keeps slapping the lab mic chabelle's got her slapping her lab mic on her knee that's what he's smoking i thought and uh i thought this special a good would have should have been called It's Harder to Be Black Than Trans. That was, to me, the gist of the special was black people are higher than trans people on the whole thing.

Starting point is 00:46:54 He's not really saying identity politics is bad. He's just like, we're higher. Because he's like, oh, you guys are all mad at me. Well, I'm black and that's tougher. I mean, the crazy thing is watching it. If you haven't seen it, it's like he gets in the trans stuff you go okay making some points and then you're like 30 minutes into trans you're loving it no you're just like still it wasn't a hefty dose yeah there's a lot of i can take a hefty dose of that so that wasn't my initiative this is a lot

Starting point is 00:47:21 there there is like um for me this is kind of one of my most things that everyone always disagrees with me. And when I go, you know, there's just like a few bands like that where it's like everyone loves them and you go, I don't know. It's just like, it's not that I don't like them. It's just kind of, I don't see it as like the sole, you know, best one in the world or whatever. But the outrage, it's almost starting to feel like a loop yeah and

Starting point is 00:47:46 that's what it was where dave chappelle would do a special about trans people the trans people would get mad everyone would watch it because of that and it would sort of continue so it is very interesting where it really is it's it's like groundhog day with his specials now where it's where also it's like there's that element. I mean, everybody says it, or at least some people say it. But you're like, if they just wouldn't make a whole stink about this and write all their thought pieces. Which is what?

Starting point is 00:48:13 This special with him talking about COVID or something. They started it. Yeah. It's not they started it. They're adding fuel to the fire. They're popularizing it. They really are. It's the outrage.

Starting point is 00:48:25 It's the cycle of outrage. Everyone goes, why do you want to talk about trans people? It's like, because this happens when we do, so it makes it funny. Because it's the number one thing you really can't talk about. So the dear white people co-showrunner, Jacqueline Moore, on why she's boycotting Netflix over a transphobic Dave Chappelle special. So this is so i went and watched the dear white trailer for dear white people no i wouldn't watch this you come a few times uh it's so if you watch the trailer for it it's basically like buzzfeed the

Starting point is 00:49:00 tv show oh my god it looks so fucking good it It's so shit. Like, it has everything, and there's like, just, oh, you're white privilege, and just... But then I'm like, it's all black people mostly in the show, but then I'm like, when the show happened, it was, the showrunner was a white guy? White trans person. Not at the time. Come on, they switched mid-show?

Starting point is 00:49:19 No, I think she came, she became trans during COVID. Do you think, so it was a, oh my god, so... I could be wrong, but I'm pretty sure... Do you think what happened So it was a... Oh, my God. I could be wrong, but I'm pretty sure... Do you think what happened was it was a white guy making the show, getting too much flack for doing the... Like, you're part of the problem. You're a white guy. And they go, not anymore.

Starting point is 00:49:35 Like, literally, I think. But, like, it was very much, you know... Holy shit, I didn't know that. It was a super woke show. I don't think... It was the woke show. The wokest show. And do you know anyone that watched that?

Starting point is 00:49:44 It was on the front of Netflix every day no it was you know this was like jammed down your throat and I can't imagine

Starting point is 00:49:51 it was that's one of the reasons why Netflix doesn't want to release their viewership because they have to admit that their fucking number one

Starting point is 00:49:58 pushes are bombs yeah their number one pushes are bombs well they're vanity pieces yeah and then their best ones are just like some fucking Adam Sandler movie 100% they have to admit that their number one pushers are... Well, they're vanity pieces. Yeah, and then their best ones are just like some fucking Adam Sandler movie.

Starting point is 00:50:06 100%. They have to admit that their number one show is like a Mary Cable Guy adaptation. Yeah, they have to show the mirror to America to be like, you like Adam Sandler. You don't care about any of this shit. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Starting point is 00:50:18 Right. They go, listen. Nothing's changed in 20 years. You guys think you like all this stuff, but the Tim Allen reboot was the number one show yeah but they also say whenever they're talking about like the getting mad at him or whatever like even if you know whether the trans stuff's higher whether it's not whatever he's saying it's like it's his point of view it's like they're saying that you're not allowed to have a point of view.

Starting point is 00:50:45 That's what he thinks. I like that he did really go in hard on the concept of punching down. Because then they can't even be like, he's punching down. Because you're like, you already said that last time. He addressed it for 15 minutes this time. So it's like, you look stupid if you say he's punching. He really took away one of their main things. Sort of.

Starting point is 00:51:03 Now it's the comedic move. It was ultimately pretty cool for him to kind of their main things. Sort of. They just are now is the comedic move, right? Yeah, and now they're just like. It was ultimately pretty cool for him to kind of, you know. Yeah, but now they're just like throw their hands up in the air. They go, dah! And they just walk away. They don't do that, though. They just kind of go through the same loop or whatever, right?

Starting point is 00:51:17 Which it is sort of, I guess, I don't know. I sort of enjoy the loop to some degree. It is funny. Like, it's not, you know, I'm not totally dismissive of it. I'm like, yeah degree it is funny like it's not you know i'm not uh totally dismissive of it i'm like yeah it is funny like you keep bugging them and they keep like responding and you keep bugging them more so that is funny to me but um i i'll tell you one thing that i did do i and this was a lot of times happen with the people that like speak slow like chappelle does a lot of like 45 minutes with one punchline like Like he speaks really slow kind of thing.

Starting point is 00:51:46 I predicted like 20 fucking punchlines. And you must be a treat to watch that with. I wasn't. I was really not a treat to watch it with. You pause it. I did pause it. You pause it. I did do that.

Starting point is 00:52:01 There you go. I 100% did that. That was fun. Dude. Girls are like, can you just play it, please? She was just like, I'll watch it later. She goes to the bathroom. She's just watching it.

Starting point is 00:52:17 I'll tell you what. The only reason she was even watching it is because she heard so many articles about how it's the worst. Yeah, yeah, yeah. She goes, I got to see what the fucking type's about. Yeah. I mean, I was. Same reason i might watch care or the karen movie yeah i was too i was like i'll watch it when i'll watch it and then it was so much stuff was happening where i'm like fuck i have to watch it right now that's what i felt like i had to watch it because everyone was talking about it yeah you go to the top we couldn't talk about it right now if we

Starting point is 00:52:39 didn't right so basically basically uh i would this is the kind of punchlines he would do where i would just predict he'd be like you know um i had gotten a fight well he was he was up to his old outlandish stories right chapelle likes the outlandish stories where he's like i got in a fight with nine lesbians and he wouldn't last last few specials ago he was on a he got a flight and he stopped a terrorist he like those stories are getting crazier but he goes um i was on a flight and he stopped a terrorist. The stories are getting crazier. But he goes, I was in a fight with this lesbian. And this lesbian goes, you know, you're trying to, you beat me up because I'm a lesbian.

Starting point is 00:53:15 And then I just paused it and I'm like, I beat her up. Not because she's a lesbian. Put it back on. 45 seconds later, I'm kicked back. And there we have it. You know what was an interesting thing? It was me watching magic tricks being like. But it's even better because Chappelle, you sort of see where he's going have it. You know what's an interesting thing? It was me watching Magic Tricks being like, but it's even better because Chappelle, you sort of see where he's going with it

Starting point is 00:53:29 and then you wait 45 seconds and you get your penny off. Because they start to think like he's not going to say it and you go, I guess we'll see, right? There were eight jokes pretty much in the whole thing. But the interesting thing nobody really talks about is how he straight up said that like all the Asian people who were getting assaulted was from black people. I sort of admitted that. that he well he did and then you're like that just

Starting point is 00:53:48 kind of gets glossed over oh yeah yeah yeah like the blogs weren't touching that nobody's touching that so there was like nobody's like you know what he did make a good point on that yeah they were just like well there was two versions of what blogs did and i kind of wanted to talk about both of them so the first one is uh this is what this is what the dear white people says girl says she goes jack lamore has always considered dave chappelle one of her favorite comic heroes and then he's brilliant goofy comedian and he's a brilliant political comedian he's been brilliant for so long but i don't think just because you've been brilliant means that you're always brilliant fair no. No, no. Well, it means you can make worse stuff, but you're not less

Starting point is 00:54:27 brilliant. I mean, yeah. I guess. It just means you're out of touch. Yeah. People can get like out of touch, but also a million people think this is brilliant. Millions of people. It's just doesn't, I mean, you could summarize, I said, you could summarize

Starting point is 00:54:43 Chappelle's special to it's harder to be black than trans mean, you could summarize, I said, you could summarize Chappelle's special to it's harder to be black than trans, and you could summarize all the articles to I don't like it when they talk about my group. Yeah, 100%. You know what I mean? You'll leave us alone. Yeah, so you could be less on the polls, but also it might just not connect with you. So more

Starting point is 00:55:00 announced on Twitter, on their Instagram Wednesday, that they will no longer work with Netflix after they watch Chappelle's latest special. So again, this is bad news that there's not going to be any Dear White People for all the DYP fans. When was the last Dear White People? I was loving the idea.

Starting point is 00:55:14 Cancel for two years or something. How good would it be though if like, they take down Dear White People, right? And then they're like, okay, what are we going to replace it with? And they come out and said, since they quit or whatever, we can't do Dear dear white people anymore so we're going to be doing dear black people with bill o'reilly and every episode one's like how to not be a criminal him and hannity

Starting point is 00:55:36 yeah it's bill o'reilly and hannity and they're doing dear dear minorities he goes no every episode's a different one. Like, dear Mexicans. Dear Mexican people. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's like the Blaze. Dear border crossers. They licensed it from the Blaze.

Starting point is 00:55:53 How funny is that? So that's what I'm thinking. It's going to replace it. Dear black people from Billy O. And they said, this is the first time I felt like, oh, people are laughing at this joke and they're agreeing that it's absurd to call me a woman so that I more

Starting point is 00:56:10 saw it and this is where I think these people are wrong I don't see it as that I think what's actually happening is they're laughing at that you're not supposed to say it yeah for sure right she goes I mean again look regular people they don't like again i know there's

Starting point is 00:56:27 been this massive push to kind of like rethink how people think but you're like people think you're a trans woman yes like like and they're like no i'm a woman woman and they're like sure but like if you really you know get people alone they're like yes you will do all the stuff you want and like we'll say you're a woman and you know like i treat you like a woman but you're like but we think you're a trans woman and also it depends how good you do it yeah but it depends how good you do it right like this is the thing well i mean put it this way just for years and years and years the oldest gag in the book which is still funny is a dude dressing up like a woman

Starting point is 00:57:06 if you take John Penne is our new reference if you take John Penne and you put him a girl's wig on him and dress him like it's funny like okay well why because it's the opposite of what you expect and so now it's like okay well it's supposed to not be funny but like there's certain things

Starting point is 00:57:22 that are kind of funny regardless like dicks and sex are funny like if you watch two like fat people having sex that's just kind of funny it doesn't mean like fat people shouldn't have sex no like if you see like the biggest gay guy in the world right like eight foot tall tough and then you finally see him then you see him like smooching a dude yeah like it's a bit iie guy. It doesn't mean you fucking hate him. No. Doesn't mean you're like, don't fuck, you better not kiss him.

Starting point is 00:57:48 It means like, just the same reason why if you see, let's say a fucking, a person that's like one foot tall, you're like, whoa, it's like, what, you against people that are one foot tall? No, you just don't normally see this that often. Absolutely. So it's a little jarring.

Starting point is 00:58:06 I walk by, there's like a dude walking in a dress and you go, their thing is like nothing should ever surprise, everything in the world should just be like, yeah, that's normal. That's normal. Not only that's normal, but forever they were like, you know,

Starting point is 00:58:20 they were like, you should recognize us as like, it's okay to be trans. And then they're like, okay, it's fine. And then they're like, no, now we're not trans women. We're just women. And people, that's when people were like, you should recognize us as like, it's okay to be trans. And then they're like, okay, it's fine. And then they're like, no, now we're not trans women. We're just women. And that's when people were like, yeah, I don't know about that. A lot of people were like,

Starting point is 00:58:33 I don't know if we actually believe that. And they go, well, you have to, or we'll get you fired if you say that. Yeah. And you go, okay. No questions. Yeah, no questions, right? And you go, oh, okay, fine.

Starting point is 00:58:42 You're a woman. But if you ask them what they really truly believe, like if you lie detector, they're like, yeah, I don't believe it's literally a woman. Yeah, there's a ton of people. I believe it's a trans woman. Live your life however you want to live your life. I don't care.

Starting point is 00:58:55 Do whatever you want. But you're like, you can't force me to believe you're a literal biological woman. And then he kind of says that, yeah. And that adds comedic power in it when you tell everyone to think something they don't already think. When someone finally says the elephant in the room essentially it becomes funny right especially when it's like someone's like yeah if i go on youtube and i say that i lose my

Starting point is 00:59:15 job that's straight up lose my job yeah well not you specifically i mean this is my fucking as a comedian i'm sure you're fucking sweating you have the same job as him, though. I know, but I'm saying, I'm sure you're... No, no, no. I'm saying the literal, the fake. You're not going to do it. I'm sure you're going to be sweating putting this on YouTube. Why am I sweating? I'm not sweating.

Starting point is 00:59:33 Well, I'm fucking... You know, you never know the mobs and trolls and they fucking, like, whatever. I won't be sweating. I'm giving your channel troubles. This is a top. Dude, Pomp just got kicked off of youtube today you know who's that anthony pompliano he's like a bitcoin guy no he just got kicked off what for for saying that trans women aren't women no he did no i'm kidding here's something about

Starting point is 00:59:54 they kept on saying he was scamming people but uh but he wasn't he was just like he just he just goes on there he goes like yeah bitcoin's the shit it's going to a million dollars and then youtube just gave youtube straight up gave him a strike earlier today and then followed it up with a minute later just be like an email saying it was a strike. And then a minute later, just like, we've deleted your channel. Whoa. Yeah. And he had a big channel.

Starting point is 01:00:15 And they don't say what it's for? They did. But it was like for something that was like not true. They're out of control over there. Dude, straight up, his videos are like he goes yeah they just talk about bitcoin and have someone someone on who has like some new like defy company and they're trying something new and he'll just talk about it he's not like come by i guess he has sponsors who are selling exchanges but they said i would say it's ironic that's for someone who famously talked

Starting point is 01:00:42 about walking away from a tv show because he felt like the message of the joke got lost he doesn't see what the message is of these jokes does to people so it is he's not wrong she's not she's not wrong right to say that jave chappelle was like i felt like i was getting the wrong laugh but this first of all this is the perspective thing where i go yeah your issue is every issue but mostly the trans stuff his issue is the black issue that's the thing that he cares about and every person and every comedian and every just like every yeah just normal human even you make decisions of where your lines are all the time what do you know there's so many things where I go personally I don't think I'd make that joke and I also make it where I go you know what one, that's the whole job is you're like, how can I get my act the closest to like what I actually think

Starting point is 01:01:31 where I'm not talking to someone and I go, I don't know if I really think that. Or I don't, you know what? That feels a little mean for me. You're like, oh, that's kind of a pussy cock joke. Like, you know, and you're trying to match all of your things. And the closer you get to perspective, the more fucking honest it is.

Starting point is 01:01:44 And it's also true that forever, like, race, you know, people, like, the racial issue was the forefront of people being like, we need, like, racial, like, equality, all this stuff. And, like, everybody being equal. And then, and that was for most of my life. And then, you know, in the last five years, the gender people took the lead. They sort of took the lead. And then. They started saying, I don't see you as in the lead. They took the lead.

Starting point is 01:02:06 And then the George Floyd thing kind of brought it back to race. They did. It was like a horse race. It was like, you know, like in the fucking Price is Right where they have like, they took it back

Starting point is 01:02:15 and he's just trying to be like, look, it's like, no, it should be race above gender. Yes. That's his thesis point. That's his thesis. Yes. Which is like, you know,

Starting point is 01:02:24 debatable. Absolutely. And on top of that, he's only talking about your thing so much because you didn't, uh, like, because you won't let him, like they did start it. It's the same thing where, how many times have you been in a fucking like a thing with your chick or whatever, where you're like, you know, talking about a bunch of stuff and blah, blah, blah. And then she was like, what's this one? And she like gets mad at you for one little thing.

Starting point is 01:02:47 Yeah, of course. What'd you say about that? And then for the next 10 hours, you're talking about that little thing. Well, it's like, that's what's happening here. It's like, he was doing a special. This was one of the things. You all, all these, the whole like, you know, other side of the industry erupted on him. And then now he's like, well, now he feels the need to like respond to all this stuff.

Starting point is 01:03:04 He's just being like almost a troll and you're it's just like the classic don't feed the trolls. Yeah. You don't have to give your opinion. I know they think well it's a matter of life and death but it's not. Well she says that. She goes well he talks about feelings being hurt. Well my feelings are fine but being thrown against a wall

Starting point is 01:03:20 hurts or worrying every night if I can get home safe. This stuff. So a lot of their argument is like this stuff leads to me dying or whatever right but in reality maybe but his argument would be like well you know if we don't the race thing that'll lead to black people dying i don't know that's correct i'm sure he could make the exact argument you could make the exact argument then also like humor can release tension also at the same time right it can it can do the opposite like dude how many i get so many fucking emails and messages and people we talk on the road that like you know what i was

Starting point is 01:03:52 getting a little fucking wild with all this shit and then after like listening to you guys like it kind of like calmed me down and now i like laugh at it and it really fucking held me on my normal or whatever just like kind of put me in a better headspace because it's just like you know you instead of being turned into a soldier for someone else's bullshit or something you just kind of let it slide and but um they said i don't know what else netflix should do but i feel like what needs to be done whether that's removed something needs to be done whether that's removing this special amending this special in some way i don't really know to be honest it's not my job to fix the problem so it's not her job to educate netflix but that'd be sick if they go if they should just rewrite no there's a she go they send her a copy of the file i go just recut this however you want it's like 12

Starting point is 01:04:34 minutes how funny is that so she fell especially he's like jacqueline moore cut yeah but it just cuts like over her voice over dubbing and it's like so i'm at this these les you know these trans bitches in a bar and then and there's nothing funny about that and they're amazing good night good night yeah yeah i cut out 40 minutes how funny is that the idea that's that thing you know kurt uh he said when he got in a fight with his girl that was like getting mad at him about this and that and they she ended up wanting to be a gender consultant and she was like well after the whole fight she was like well you should hire me on amy schumer's show to be a gender consultant so you give them the scripts and you go like am i offending anyone here and they come back and be like yes that's what comedy

Starting point is 01:05:20 shows need yeah yeah yeah that's exactly what comedy shows are missing but it has these places have them. So that's kind of what she's saying is like, one of her big things is like, you know, she just, all I think is that

Starting point is 01:05:29 I think they need to hire more trans people and they should be kind of looking over these things and no trans person would have let this happen. But it's like, I mean, again,

Starting point is 01:05:37 He's a stand-up comedian. If you want to do Dave Chappelle's special, I don't think you could fucking, you know, that's all there is to it. Yeah, it's like, there's no way that would, stuff like that would fly in a tv show that's produced and has six

Starting point is 01:05:48 episodes and has like a whole crew probably not but you're like you give chapelle 20 million dollars for what is like you know the least headache out of anything you can produce like if you're netflix as a producer you're like we give him a cut him a check he fucking rents a theater does the thing and he hands us the thing and that's it there's no like oh there's problems on the set we have to shut down production for two weeks because there's covid we have to rent like there's nothing it's the most like easy thing for that yeah it's brilliant fucking movie yeah it's easy but they said uh the the it always makes me like, the idea that even before there was kind of, like, when you're talking about the movies, there is, like, the same reason when people say it's just jokes. People will be like, well, why can we not do it in comedy, but they can do it in movies?

Starting point is 01:06:38 And then they're like, yeah, you're right. They shouldn't be able to do it in movies. Like, whenever you do those arguments of why shouldn't they be able to do it there it always goes the other way like how many times of comedians we know being like well why can rappers say this in songs but we can't do it on stage and they're like you're right rappers shouldn't be able to do it either we're gonna get to them yeah like it always goes that way which is so funny censorship for all yeah yeah but you think you're kind of like it's equivalent of your parents like why does my brother get to stay up late you're like you're right your brother won't be able to stay up late

Starting point is 01:07:08 either that's kind of always just a snip that's how it always shakes down lights go out that's so i never like to i never like to use those arguments even the ones where it's like oh it's just jokes because it's like then you're just sort of throwing other people out on the bus where you're just like well so what you're allowed to have a perspective as long as you're trying to be funny it's like you're either allowed to have a perspective or you're not right also another thing is like most people don't most people agree with chapelle well that's yeah i guess that's that's her that's really her beef but she doesn't want the common opinion out there she wants the right opinion out there so that's the kind of the issue which i guess you know the fact that most people agree with something doesn't necessarily

Starting point is 01:07:48 make it correct i mean i i will say this like watching i go like yeah he really did fucking beat that horse like i was like me i agree i'm like i'm like you're still doing like the trans stuff here like we're like yeah like this is like a lot there's a lot of chance to move on i almost felt like you like like what was on the cutting room floor i talk about topics like that and i always feel like around the five six minute mark like this is enough of this topic yeah yeah it is you're like it's he pulled it off i don't know i'm sure he's been killing going around doing this thing have you i remember watching who are you that's the whole point is we can say whether we liked it or not, but it's not up to you

Starting point is 01:08:27 to tell someone else what to fucking make. No. But also I was watching it and at one point I was like, did I see what I thought I just saw? But then I wasn't sure and I wasn't going to rewind it.

Starting point is 01:08:37 But so at one point he's doing the trans shake and they cut to the audience and there's these two just like look like trans fat ladies. I saw those. It was interesting to see those two there. I saw that as he's talking about all this trans stuff and these two just like look like trans fat ladies i saw those interesting to see those two there i saw that as he's talking about all this trans and they're just like

Starting point is 01:08:49 not having it that was strange you don't like you know you know it's a special they're probably like you're not even allowed to leave i don't know if they can really not let you leave but or maybe they just look like that and everyone's extrapolating no because i watched it and saw that and then the photos started like making the rounds like on social media of like him telling the trans jokes and then they're just like like they did not look right i was like what are they even doing there they probably like yeah maybe they'll talk about i don't know if they were trans but they looked like definitely like not fans of chappelle and definitely at the two minute mark, they were like, all right, let's wrap this trans stuff up. Let's more George,

Starting point is 01:09:27 more George Floyd, less trans. Well, so we'll, we'll wrap on her thing, but I did want to just quickly say this other one that was just making me laugh. Like,

Starting point is 01:09:35 because, okay. So basically NPR, and this is more where it was getting funny for me is Npr is having the same debate is is black higher than trans or whatever right and in in defending trans they were forced to do the same shit that like fox news would do to the black arguments which is why okay so this is the kind of stuff they'll be like so he says in this country you can shoot and kill a N-word. Chappelle says, but you better not hurt a gay person's feelings.

Starting point is 01:10:15 And then they say, what Chappelle didn't say is that DaBaby claims he was defending himself against two men when he tried to rob his family in the store. Eventually, he was found guilty of a misdemeanor charge, carrying a concealed weapon. Though the family of the 19-year-old's dad insist to baby started the fight so this is essentially when people are like this guy got killed by the cops and why is that guy killed but this white guy runs free and then people are like well yeah because the black guy pulled a knife out and the white guy did they're forced they're forced to do to give context all this stuff they're forced to give context to like black power movements that are charged like how many times would someone go they go well why is this you know uh this guy dead

Starting point is 01:10:53 but this guy's alive and the other won't be like well the one guy surrendered and the other guy we looked into the police report and the other one guy like do you know what i mean had a weapon and he was shooting they're they're forcing to essentially, they're one step away from him being like, and trans people do more crimes too. And it'd be like, actually, the statistics, they're goaded into arguing against the black power shit. Do you know what I mean?

Starting point is 01:11:21 Intersectionality gets pretty messy. And it's getting real messy right now, especially with COVID thrown into the fucking mix. And like black kid who shot up the school or whatever and that was fucking super affluent family and he's getting bullied for being rich i know and they're going they're like hmm that was the new york post well he got i'm bullied i remember seeing that and they were like like they were he shot he shot up a school and then he was on bail for 75 grand the next day. And I remember being like, that's crazy.

Starting point is 01:11:50 Like 75, you're out the next day after shooting up a school? And then people were like, well, he's black. And you go, all right, good win for you guys. How many comics, when that came out, looked at their set list and crossed off, only school shooters are white. Yeah. Ah. Ah.

Starting point is 01:12:08 Yeah, yeah. That is a hot topic. Well, no. Just like when Obama got to office, like, if a president was black material. Yeah. Well, in that way, they go, it's like,

Starting point is 01:12:17 well, it's a type of school shooting. They have to get really granular. Yeah, they gotta get specific. It's not all schools. It's like a specific. But that's the thing. And now they're in that territory. They're making the same arguments

Starting point is 01:12:28 as everyone said, where they go, well, if you actually do mass shootings, three or more, then the gang shootings are included. So they're always like.

Starting point is 01:12:37 Chicago's really skewing those stats. So Dave Chappelle said, if slaves had oil and booty shorts on, we might have been. I love talking about comedy. Like, it's a series of book reports.

Starting point is 01:12:48 I know. I mean, they're essentially fact-checking his black jokes, you know? Which is just so... And this is a guy at NPR. You know, I'm sure he looks like Neil Brennan. You know what I mean? Yeah. Then they go...

Starting point is 01:12:58 So they said, Dave Chappelle said, if slaves had oil and booty shorts on, we might have been free a hundred years sooner. So he's saying black is harder to be black. It would be funny if they go, Snopes, mark that as false. Well, that's what they said. They go, but lines like that assumes the struggles over oppression are a zero-sum game.

Starting point is 01:13:19 That because some gay people have access to white privilege in America and their concern is stereotyping and marginalization are hollowed and subordinate to what black people face. So that's what NPR says. But like, so if they're saying that, uh, the one logical thing that was a real flaw, I remember in the moment was him basically to prove his point about that saying that like all gay people are white. And I was like, that's obviously not true.

Starting point is 01:13:42 Yeah. But like, my point is they have to be the ones to say that I watch like some fucking black you know power shit sometimes and you're like I mean actually you know what I mean okay but like I'm not trying to write articles about it and be a progressive I forgot actually that I watched this so

Starting point is 01:13:58 on Friday night when we got back from Chicago I went over my girl's house and CNN Don Lemon was on and he was talking about this and so he had a bunch of people on so he had uh some chick like female and she was saying how chip hell's the worst and then he brought on this black trans comic from like atlanta yeah and the black comic was like was trans and she's basically like look you know i have to come at this i'm like i'm a comedian i'm black i'm trans she's. I'm trans. She's got all the things. She goes, I got all the things.

Starting point is 01:14:26 And she's kind of like, I'm a comedian first, blah, blah, blah. Nice respect. But she kind of gave him the pass. But then I was like, you want to open for Dave Chappelle. But she had a Netflix special, but she did. I've never heard of her. That's a based move. Yeah, yeah.

Starting point is 01:14:40 But she was like, but I was feeling this, like the way she was going after this. So I'm like, yeah, you want to. You want the Chappelle retweet. You want to get like yeah you want to you want the chappelle retweet you want to get in the chappelle retweet but they go um when they said it's not a zero-sum game i to be honest like it kind of is like if you're saying like okay intersectionality is not a zero-sum game um in a workplace it is when you're deciding who gets the grants it is yeah when you're deciding who's on set it is if you're saying hey we need this we're like deciding what intersectionality we need on set it is 100 percent yeah not yeah when you're talking about budgeting when you're talking about a lot of things when you're talking about

Starting point is 01:15:21 who gets press coverage which group gets press coverage when you're talking all of those things to some degree it is a zero-sum game yeah not just not just being intersectional list someone who talks about intersectionality maybe it's a zero-sum game between you guys because you support all of them yeah but if you're in one of those groups and that's your primary predominant thing it is a zero-sum game for you. Oh, absolutely. If you're trying to be like, we need more of this and this, then it is. Of course it is.

Starting point is 01:15:49 Like, whose spot are you getting? Spots come... Girls, if girls count as minorities, and they're on film sets, and you need to have a certain... In CBC, if you need to have a certain amount of, you know, whatever on your thing. If girls count,

Starting point is 01:16:03 well, then that's taking away from the spots from the other people, obviously. Do you think a guy's ever been like, describing his girlfriend? He's like, yeah, I'm dating a minority. And you go, and then just like a white chick? I thought you said you were dating a minority. Yeah, according to CBC.

Starting point is 01:16:15 He goes, it's a woman. What do you mean? I'm dating a minority. Yeah. And they say, gay people are minorities until they need to be white again. That was kind of the point that you were saying was funny

Starting point is 01:16:27 because it's not all white to be honest culturally this kind of like woke white people non-binary stuff to me that is like a white person stuff it is super white which is why I think we kind of make fun of it funny it's because we understand that culture

Starting point is 01:16:43 probably better than you know if I'm making fun of like the intricacies of Muslim culture I don't actually know it that well but this kind of like progressive like college kid white people shit I know that's my whole fucking you know I'm around that shit yeah I'm in that world so they said Chappelle says that is a capper to a different story about his conflict with a white man at a nightclub who called the police the comic says the man he nearly fought was gay and then they said and yes we know what calling the police on a black man can mean but if some belligerent jerk was confronting me at a nightclub i'd probably call the cops regardless of the race uh and chapelle refused to consider this popular

Starting point is 01:17:20 possibility yeah so sort of like what karen's say yeah when you go this girl called the police on a guy because he's black and they go no i'm i called the police on him because he was harassing real reason and then they and then they like that's what she's arguing right now you know what i have another right yeah and i'm actually another i didn't even like kind of realize this until now but another issue i have with the Chappelle stuff was he had all these anecdotes, but he so often has all these like fake ones. The fake anecdotes. For me, that's the thing I can't listen to.

Starting point is 01:17:52 But the problem was, and then he keeps being like, yeah, I was in this bar and I was talking to this woman. And I was like, I'm on the moon and me and my two friends are on the moon. Not even on the moon. He was telling things that were obviously plausible. He goes, I'm in Ohio. Plausible is fine with me. I still like when it's not plausible.

Starting point is 01:18:06 Yeah, I know. But then I guess I was like, is this even where he goes, and the daughter, and he goes I'm in Ohio plausible is fine with me I guess yeah I know but then I guess I was like is this even where he goes and the daughter and he goes my daughter's trans and I go is any of this real yeah like I was I specifically with him well that's the problem with the fake stories they make the real stories unbelievable that's what I'm saying and he goes and then she goes oh but my daughter's transsexual

Starting point is 01:18:22 because he was a very pretty girl or whatever and then like and you're like is this even I don't know it's likesexual because he was a very pretty girl or whatever. And then you're like, is this even? I don't know. I was like, it might be. He really sells it. And it doesn't have to be true. But when you told me the thing before that you stopped a terrorist attack.

Starting point is 01:18:32 I know. And he didn't have anything like that in this special. Dude, Chappelle. And again, he's fucking still the man and pretty cool. Yeah, I love Chappelle. But so when they're saying that, they're basically saying no

Starting point is 01:18:46 that person probably just called the cops on you because of something else not because you're black and it was like hmm remember the gay nightclub shooter that released a manifesto

Starting point is 01:18:55 that said it had nothing to do with the people being gay yeah and these people or do you remember the spa shooter they went in and shot prostitutes and you were like

Starting point is 01:19:03 he shot them because he's Asian yeah guess who argued against it like you know of course so these people you remember the spa shooter? They went in and shot prostitutes and you were like, he shot them because he's Asian. Yeah, guess who argued against it? Like, you know. So these people are boxed into a corner where they're saying it's a zero-sum game. Well, then why are you arguing against his things? Because it's clearly not a zero-sum game. No.

Starting point is 01:19:18 No. Chappelle reacts to how he once asked why it was easier for Caitlyn Jenner to transition in public than Cassius Clay to change his name for Muhammad Ali, ignoring the obvious answer that one was 50 years earlier. Is this not all of the same thing where they go, hey, look, there's white male CEOs right now.

Starting point is 01:19:40 And you go, yeah, that was 25 years ago that they entered the workforce. They had that position for 15 years. Well, why are all the CEOs white if white men are doing better? It's like, because that was 30 years ago that those people entered that company. So I just thought it was... These are not consistent. I just thought it was funny that he's got people wrapped up arguing against him. And again, he knew exactly what he was doing.

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Starting point is 01:22:34 But someone sent me another pegging story. And here's the thing. It was a funnier one. But I've also been accused of being the pegging guy. You are the pegging guy. So it's a little bit of a will they want. To the point, too, where it's like we joke about pegging so much, where my girlfriend is like, she's like, do you want to get pegged?

Starting point is 01:22:57 Again? Again. So I'm not, listen, I don't know. Do you think they want it? I'm not going to go through the whole thing. Maybe just a two on it. Give him a taste. The headline was too good.

Starting point is 01:23:10 My boyfriend, I don't know, he goes, like a good pegging, can we tease it and then finish on the Patreon? No, because we're not going to go through this whole thing. Okay. But I say we fucking, I just got to tell you this scenario. Let's give her a nice peg.

Starting point is 01:23:26 So my boyfriend made me peg him, and he liked it so much that now he wants to be the girl in the relationship. So this is the problem with pegging, right? Give them an inch. They want a mile. I want the fucking full mile. You give them an inch.

Starting point is 01:23:41 They want a girthy mile, too. They want the girthy mile. I want a regular mile. I'm just going gonna read the first one Here's a little something Then maybe we're going back into retirement We just come out every time My boyfriend and I were having relationship issues

Starting point is 01:23:56 And then we tried something new He wanted to try it but he was afraid that sometimes And the idea disgusted him When we tried it And it was better than normal vanilla sex i really liked it and it was most emotionally connected sex we've had which makes zero sense because you're not even touching or looking at him in the face you're looking at the back of his head so or does he have legs up pecking oh no so connected i actually pegged him three times

Starting point is 01:24:21 in 24 hours this guy is getting it he says now he wants to be the girl in our relationship. He doesn't want to transition to become a girl, but he just wants to be more the girl physically and emotionally. So sexually and emotionally. So how, her, her question is she, this is from,

Starting point is 01:24:37 you know, uh, she's asking for advice and she says, how can I be more of the guy in the relationship now that my boyfriend wants to be the girl not just sexually but in everyday life from Pegless in Portland how fucking funny is that he goes

Starting point is 01:24:56 this guy's like, I don't want a tough guy, I don't want anything to do with that and then he pegs him and he comes out and he goes, I'd like to be the woman I'd like to be the woman I mean, if she wants to be the guy it's a pretty easy way to do with that. And then he pegs him and he comes out and he goes, I'd like to be the woman. I'd like to be the woman. I mean, if she wants to be the guy, it's a pretty easy way

Starting point is 01:25:09 to do that. What do you think she should do? Make more money. That's what I was thinking. Fin pegging. Now, now listen.

Starting point is 01:25:15 Like fin dom, fin peg. Fin peg him. Well, I was thinking some of the maybe techniques she'd say is,

Starting point is 01:25:21 uh, if you're watching the game, maybe tell him to leave you alone. She wants to practice being the guy in the relationship. Just fucking make me a sandwich and shut the fuck up. She can start by listening to the boys cast if she wants to be the man

Starting point is 01:25:33 but now that she's pledging allegiance to the boy and trying to be the man in this scenario I guess maybe if you notice him getting electrocuted now. So that's a good thing if you're a boys cast listener Don't start getting pegged Because it could lead you to being the girl And then getting the electro treatment

Starting point is 01:25:48 Maybe belching Maybe when you're hanging out with them Like hey how you doing Try a couple parts Really hard pats on the back Wear a tool belt The hard pats on the back are my least favorite of any quality anyone has meeting anyone that gives you the fucking solid packs what's up buddy oh it's a big pet peeve of

Starting point is 01:26:14 mine so i don't know you're gonna want to pull that wallet open so you might want to get a crowbar to keep that wallet of yours open every now and then like a mousetrap uh carrying things to the house that's something maybe start peeing standing up oh you know just all the stuff that you all the stuff you would think that's fucking i like the one of his answers because it goes uh because you guys he goes you also need to bear in mind that pegging while wonderful won't solve won't solve your underlying relationship issues which is essentially him saying you're not going to peg your way out of your problems so if anyone's listening and they thought pegging was the answer you think you're going to peg your

Starting point is 01:26:55 way out of your problems you're not going to peg your way out of your relationship problems okay so there's one more i have another dose okay, okay. So he's giving advice and he goes, So they should again start small, said Barrett. Maybe delegate a few tasks that were hers to him and she could tell him how she wants them done. Whatever it is. Dishes, laundry, cock sucking. Fuck off.

Starting point is 01:27:20 It's in the thing. I didn't read the whole thing because I knew people weren't gonna want it literally says danny couldn't help himself the begging guy i prepared she says the girl's tasks he said he literally says do some yeah get him to delegate a few girls tasks to him like dishes laundry or cocksucker maybe like i'm gonna send that to your chick be like here's your that was a lenny's joke he goes my uh my uh wife uh fucking uh she she never gives me a blow job because the word jobs in the title right and he goes so i put it on the grocery list because she always gets things in

Starting point is 01:27:56 the grocery ship then her mom took the grocery lenny fucking rules dude i love dude that these things are like the epitome of like wokeness and all that stuff but then they're like yeah do chick shit like laundry and dick sucking dick sucking and you're like wait are there gender roles or not because your last article was like how they don't exist

Starting point is 01:28:18 and now it's just like yeah you know chick shit Reggie goes oh you should uh I want to do chick shit you go well tell them it's make no difference tell them there make no difference. Yeah, tell him there's no such thing. So I love if this guy was a burly dude. I wanted to.

Starting point is 01:28:36 So this thing came up. So we were talking about how, how if you, the people on the internet, I think this was on a patron, but there's people on people on the internet, I think this was on a patron, but there's people on,

Starting point is 01:28:51 on the internet that were like faking having disabilities, like autism and stuff. Right. So there's this whole autism section of basically a tick talk and they have, they find their little community and then there's all these people that are kind of faking it. Right. Did we talk about this last week? Yes.

Starting point is 01:29:04 Yeah. Okay. Okay. Yeah. that's my point okay so but there's this whole fucking community of people and they're posting about it right so i was kind of digging deep into it or whatever and they did a test that says if you're autist autistic which all of the things sound like you yeah i was gonna say i want to do the test that's i have the question give me the test so we'll go through so these are in your for your list they get home i will say that almost every girlfriend i've ever had has been like well that's my chick she was like looking at the thing and she goes they're all of the things are just you let's make let's do it okay so there is a few that i i'm not sure which way they're going but i just wrote down the questions we're not actually going to go through the whole day but so okay so

Starting point is 01:29:50 this would be like a first uh thing do you find that you have a sense of humor that's different than the mainstream correct looks like i'm not gonna peg my way out of this problem well you do all you like when you do Holocaust jokes on stage. Would you consider that mainstream comedy? Your taste, the kind of jokes you're into? Correct. So this is the kind of stuff. Do you ever notice patterns?

Starting point is 01:30:15 I do. The thing is about these tests, it's because it's like you get to be in the neurodivergent now, right? Yeah. So all of the things are just like fairly normal. Basically, I'm going to finish up this quiz with a disability. Well, that's the thing. Once we finish this test, you get to go on autism Twitter with your people. I'm disabled TikTok.

Starting point is 01:30:38 Well, for noticing patterns, that's pretty standard for you. Every time I see you, I walk by, you're on the open mic, and you're like, white people be like this, black people. Someone drops pencils on like 97 pencils. That's definitely 97 pencils. You're always, you're always noticing patterns, right? That's a big thing for you. Like chicks be like this, men be like this.

Starting point is 01:30:58 Girls be shopping. Remember you just said that before. Girls be shopping. Girls do be shopping. Okay. Okay. Do you stay away from situations where people might express affection for you? No.

Starting point is 01:31:11 Fuck yeah. Maybe sometimes. Oh, you consider yourself a big affection guy, Daniel? I don't know. I'm not. Well, all of these are a bit me too, but. Yeah, sometimes. You're a big affection.

Starting point is 01:31:22 I feel like we're just. You're kind of a PDA guy now, actually. That's what I'm saying. Sometimes I am a PDA guy. That's a new thing that you're a big affection oh i feel like we're just you're a kind of a guy now actually that's what i'm saying sometimes i am that's a new thing that you're a pda guy yeah danny probably never held a girl's hand in public and now he's fucking tongue down his throat at the fucking center of that's what i'm saying maybe i'm not gardens maybe this is just like a fucking cool dude test and i'm just passing the cool dude test i think your autism rubbed off a little bit yeah it's kind of what happened right yeah okay so here's one do you feel like you're being persecuted in some way always would you say that some of your people have a bit of persecution

Starting point is 01:31:56 yeah like only for the last 6 000 years have you ever have you ever mentioned that people like you're being persecuted yeah yeah yeah we have been i mean it's kind of verifiable yeah have you ever been on passover you think people are like during fucking world war ii or like walking around with the yellow armbands being like this sucks you go oh fucking fucking persecution complex over here this guy with the go i don't want to wear the yellow armband it goes classic persecution complex persecution complex okay um so do you uh ever have the urge to jump over things jump over that's really one of the questions yeah that's an interesting one so you know like they're like let's say that you saw...

Starting point is 01:32:45 Like a sewer? Yeah, you're like, I can't step on that. No, I can step on them. You can step on them? Yeah, I can step on them. But you have an urge to jump to conclusions. Yes, I do have an urge to jump to conclusions. You have a jump to conclusions, Matt.

Starting point is 01:32:58 That was the best. Okay, so you don't have an urge to jump, so you're one for five right now. Four for five. Four for five. Four for five. Do you take pride in your appearance? A bit. No, you don't.

Starting point is 01:33:10 A regular amount. You think you take pride in your appearance? I mean, I'm not like fucking... I mean, I... I got a nice haircut last week. I didn't mean... I don't want to like be the... I'm not...

Starting point is 01:33:18 Oh, I'm wearing this because I was on my way to the gym. I'm not trying to do this test to make you feel bad about yourself. Yeah. But like, no one's ever mentioned that... I'm not trying to do this test to make you feel bad about yourself. Yeah. But like, no one's ever mentioned that... I'm not a metro sexual. When I met you, I buy all my shirts online, like on like this one website.

Starting point is 01:33:33 Yeah, so what, Steve Jobs is fucking autistic? No, yeah. Oh, maybe he was actually. Hey, rest my case. So, oh, so I guess Steve Jobs isn't fashionable now? You think Steve Jobs takes pride in his appearance? No, he's just fucking simplifying

Starting point is 01:33:49 his life. That's correct. Yeah. Obviously, my point of this test is bullshit. Well, yeah, yeah, yeah. But I mean, I don't... I'm not like the most prideful, but I'm not like someone who goes, yo, you have barbecue sauce on your face.

Starting point is 01:34:06 I also could be misinterpreting this question that if you take pride in your appearance, you're autistic. Right. No, I think it's the opposite. Yeah, if you're like a slob that wears track pants out, it's autistic quality.

Starting point is 01:34:15 Yeah, I don't wear track pants out. No, but you do. My girlfriend, she's like, you should wear track pants. Let me ask you a question. Do you wear the same pants most days? Yeah. Do you wear- I own three days? Yeah. Do you wear?

Starting point is 01:34:25 I own three pairs of jeans. Have you ever owned like a big blue, like Costanza bubble jacket sort of situation? That's a fucking, dude, Drake has that. That's a fucking, Drake literally has that same jacket. You think you dress like Drake? I don't dress like Drake, but I have a Patagonia jacket that Drake has. If you're going to tell me that, I'm going to take pride in my appearance wearing the same clothes as Drizzy Drake.

Starting point is 01:34:45 You're the guy. The six god. You have a fucking huge ass bubble jacket and you're like, I'm like Drake. I'm not saying I'm like Drake. No. You're like George Costanza

Starting point is 01:34:54 is exactly who you're like. You and Drake. It's cortex. Okay. Do you prefer to do things on your own even when you could use others' help or expertise? Like, for example, fixing your girlfriend's bed. Yeah.

Starting point is 01:35:08 I put together a bed, actually. She didn't help. I don't know why that one's super autistic. I guess the idea is... I think it's just you don't work well with people. You don't work well with people, and I think they're also saying that maybe you don't even trust other people. You have to do it your own way.

Starting point is 01:35:23 Yeah, but I think there is a thing with people who are autism. They really don't work well trust other people. Like you have to do it your own way. Yeah. But I think there is a thing with like people who are autism, whether they're like, they really don't work well with other people. Right. Which would be a funny dynamic on this podcast. If I was super autistic and you're just like, you're just asking me questions and I'm like, I'd give you nothing back.

Starting point is 01:35:36 I'd rather do this myself. Yeah. Still here. You, you do sort of consider yourself Mr. Fix it sometimes. Like even we came here, we got the air conditioner here and it was kind of like on and off.

Starting point is 01:35:47 And Danny's always like, oh, I could rig up something. Well, I was looking to buy a timer on Amazon, but they don't make them for the voltage of these air conditioners. So you might describe that as something- I'm not Mr. Fix-It. My friends who are actually Mr. Fix-It

Starting point is 01:35:59 like laugh at the idea that fucking I can handy an end for my family. So you might say that your friends say that you do you try to do it on your own when you probably could have used the helper expertise no no no i know where my depth like i had to hang a tv at my place i'm not fucking trying that i was like no that'd be ridiculous but like little things all you know i put together my bed and my couch and all my this test is crazy though right where they go do you that's like every dad they're like oh it's a little bit autistic

Starting point is 01:36:30 like you know what i mean i don't know they just you ever do the socialism like where you find the political scale test and it's just like they basically it's for people that want to have a neurodivergent thing to say they are you know like or it's the equivalent of they always do this they'll be like oh let's find out if you're a socialist or capitalist like question one do you tend to prefer socialism or capitalism like they're always it's so obvious you know what i mean and you go i'm very much this and you go you're basically just all you need is one question to just i always say that joke is the family matters where there's the chalkboard on the car they say just drive right on the chalkboard how fast you think you're going that's the speedometer yeah that's that's

Starting point is 01:37:08 all of these tests or they go they could start out by what do you think you are and you know what the questions are so you just end up with what you think you are definitely confirmation bias exactly what else we got okay five more do you five more yeah okay more? Yeah. Okay. Do you get a pleasurable tingling sensation in the head, scalp, or back of the body in response to certain sounds? Like a cha-ching, maybe. Does ass count as back of the body? Yeah, yeah, yeah. What sound would that be? Do you get a tingling in your back when you hear...

Starting point is 01:37:43 No, I don't get tinglings. No tingling? Not even cha-ching? That's an autism thing where you get a tingling in your back when you hear No I don't get tinglings No tingling not even cha-ching That's an autism thing where you get a tingling You don't even get a I'll tell you what you do get A bit of a tingling sensation in your eyes When you hear Because you have the vibrator on

Starting point is 01:37:59 I didn't even know that There are a lot of these things I'm like yeah I've heard of this stuff Tingling Danny gets a bit of a tingling in his ass when he was I get a bit of a tingling when my thank you when my girlfriend turns on the remote battery power vibrator underwear all right do you dislike it when people drop by and visit you uninvited yes it. It's just everybody. It's just everybody. I know.

Starting point is 01:38:26 Who the fuck likes that? What psycho always goes, I'm dropping in. You go, okay. Yeah, what psycho likes that? Do you have problems finding your way to new places? Yes. Yes, 100%. I have poor special ability.

Starting point is 01:38:39 Yes, me too. That's also me. Have you been accused of staring? No. Jugs count. Jugs count? No. that's also me have you been accused of staring no i'm if anything jugs count jugs count no no i've never been a stare if anything i've been like too far in the other direction where i won't stare but i'm not like a no you've been accused of what no eye contact no no i'm not a no eye contact i am an exact normal amount of eye contact but like i won't be i won't stare sometimes i'll stare off in the distance some Some of these are weird. Do you like tongue kissing?

Starting point is 01:39:05 Sure. Yeah, I don't know. Like what that's trying to prove or whatever, right? Autistic people do or don't? Don't. They don't, for sure. Right, because it's like gross to them. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Starting point is 01:39:16 It's gross. And then last, this one. The final things turns out you're not autistic, as it says the last question is, do you dislike it when people walk behind you? Do dislike it no i'm always well daniel his whole thing is he walks like 400 miles in front of everyone so that i'm just a fast walker i'm i fucking surround myself with slow ass walkers it's the problem everyone's it's everyone else's fault i'm a faster walker than you i'll fucking no because you have something to prove though no matter how fast anyone's walking

Starting point is 01:39:43 you're in front i'm telling you you put by myself, I walk the exact same pace. Yeah, I don't think. It's in my app, in my phone. It says exactly the pace I walk. I guarantee you I walk the exact same speed regardless of who I'm with. Which wouldn't be such a problem if we weren't in a hurry, you're with girls, and you don't know where you're going. Yeah. No, the real issue is I'm literally with girls sometimes who are just smaller. Way smaller then i'm no one's in a hurry nobody's in a hurry and i just and you

Starting point is 01:40:09 don't know where you're going yes the the thing is everyone's rushing to catch up and then you realize you walk fucking i will say this though 90 of the time i do know where i'm going but i have this thing where i because i keep actually noticing this with once you brought it up is i'll be walking and then in my mind, I'm following you even though you're like 10 feet behind me. I'm just going in the direction, but we're all-

Starting point is 01:40:30 Sounds a little autistic. I know. I'm saying that. I'm admitting it. Where I go like, in my mind, I go like, oh, I'm following you.

Starting point is 01:40:35 You're behind me, but we're all going this direction. So I'll just like go. And then I'm like, oh, nobody's following it. It's the blind leading the blind. It's always the blind leading the blind. But I'm getting there faster.

Starting point is 01:40:48 Shit. Anyways, what am I, 12% autistic? All right. Anyways, by the time this comes out, there's some tickets to the 11 o'clock show because I think everyone thought it was sold out. So a few more got opened up for the 11 o'clock show and the New York taping.

Starting point is 01:41:04 Other than that leave us a review bonus episode every week patreon.com slash the boys cast questions to the boys cast with Ryan Long at gmail.com tell a friend review comments on how autistic

Starting point is 01:41:19 you think I am out of one to a hundred autistic boys unite and if you are an autistic boy, just so you know. We're neurodivergent. We're not called autistic. We're neurodivergent. We're neurodivergent guys like me. I'm actually going to change my fucking Twitter bio. You know what Danny is? He's neurodivergent.

Starting point is 01:41:38 Come on, that. Damn it. That's alright. He's a neurodeed virgin. Someone's going to use that against someone who says i'm i'm neurodivergent more like a fucking narrow d virgin nerd fucking get him all right thank you very much peace accidentally four boys

The Boyscast with Ryan Long - MORE WOMEN IN SUMO WRESTLING

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