The Boyscast with Ryan Long - Should Men Get Pegged?, Stepmom Exposing, & Passover Loopholes

Episode Date: April 2, 2021

Send me your questions to [e-mail]  After everyone sent me articles about pegging I went through an article with Danny, and also a stepmom exposes herself to kids for feminist reasons and passover loopholes.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

And you can tell our friends, and they can have my things when we're dead. But we don't end forever. But we don't end forever. And you can tell our friends, and they can have my things when we're dead. And we are back. The much anticipated. So I got sent four or five different pegging articles. By your girlfriend?

Ryan's girlfriend goes, hey, Ryan, I think we need to do some pegging. Hey, I've been talking to Danny, and he's been doing this this and I was wondering if that's something you're into because I know you guys I'm not if you've been hanging around him and he's trying I'm just telling you that I'm not all the benefits of pegging I'm like one of those new age people with like fucking organic food but it's just me with pegging but before okay before and before that I did want to say that I have there's five different weekends coming up. Virginia Beach, St. Louis, New York, which is going to be weekend at Caroline's,

Kansas City, and Naples, ryanlongcomedy.com for tickets. But before it goes to the pegging article, which is, again, much, much anticipated. Everyone's been asking for it. The news articles have been asking for it. Ryan's been asking for the news articles ryan's been asking for it specifically most of the pegging articles i looked up were just like when's the boys cast doing this article when will the boys cast be responding do you get you got sent this specific article by multiple people or i got sent this one a couple times it's sort of the big boy the big

boy but there's if you go back so a lot of these places like vice you you go back and they were and they have like 9 000 articles on pegging right and and some of them are the probably the best ones were like titles that are that funny but the title will be like is sugar ray lennon lennon's uh you know uh sugar ray lennon sugar ray lennon uh sugar ray stallion i believe is the name but what's his big song like every morning there's a halo and they're like

is that about pegging right and then they're like if you look at it what's the halo but it's a halo of poo I guess gaylo

but before that I was gonna say Miami we've been getting rinsed right and left so there's a new scam that's was going to say Miami, we've been getting rinsed right and left. So there's a new scam that's been going on in Miami. So basically what the places do, they say the gratuity is included. Yeah.

Just so you know, whenever we've been out, I have my eye on this. We haven't been rinsed together. You probably get rinsed all the time on this. I feel like I've been probably scammed on this 35 times. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Yeah, yeah. And the thing is, it's not consistent. If you go to places in Europe, they'll be like, that's just the standard.

They auto-grat. So what Ryan's talking about is they put an auto-tip on, but not for huge parties. There's two of you, and they go, it's an auto-tip. Okay. If they put an auto-tip on, I go, okay, whatever. You put an auto-tip on. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Whatever.

And you're not getting a penny more or a penny less now. No, no. Fine. It's a risk they take because they're like well you might have got more they wouldn't have but they might have but that's not the issue the issue is they put the auto gratuity in the first bill so you got to be like oh they're paying but then the second bill says no tip included yeah and it says and then it will know so yeah and then it basically says here and it gives you the percentages so you you don't have to figure it out to basically like double tip like it'd be like they want you to double percent this much 18 this much 20 this much or whatever and you're like

it's what one of the biggest scams i've ever heard you go okay so i tipped and then i literally asked the girl it's like she feels like she got busted on something i know i go she goes oh no no no yeah i go hey is there a tip included because it's it says no tip included and she goes yeah yeah it's included it's like i go why would you not put that on there last time i was here i learned from people locals they go miami's a big scam city a lot of people trying to rinse it well that's the other scam well i guess you could say i mean you're not gonna see this on your fucking feminist blogs but every single place is girls pay half yeah so i pay full danny's half price walking around i wish i put on a wig to fucking pay half but they basically that's a one thing the girls were talking about where to go and stuff and they're saying this place is half and i did

the meme where it's uh uh girlfriends club owners boyfriends paying more me and danny paying more yeah the one thing everyone agrees on double rinsed and then oh there was a few months okay we'll talk about that stuff a bit because there was then we went to basically a club and then i go outside and i sit on the mercedes for like two fucking seconds yeah and everyone's sort of there it's in the parking lot so i'm against this mercedes and then I get up, the thing, the tag's broken. Yeah,

where I broke the fucking thing. Allegedly, maybe I did, maybe I didn't. You did. Well, there's no proof of that, though,

that's what I'm saying. No, there's no proof. Also, this is a totally illegal thing we're at. We're at an illegal party. Illegal, like a warehouse rave.

And this guy's parked, essentially, in the fucking warehouse. Yeah, yeah, he, well, he thought he was slick,

too, because he's like, I'm going to get the, like, valet parking at the rave thing, which is like, why did you even drive there? That used to be a huge move

when I was a kid, like people stealing the Mercedes pendants and giving them as necklaces. Oh, of course, of course. So then the guy goes, the guy comes up to me and he goes,

oh, you can't leave. We're going to make you pay. I go, and I'm kind of like, yeah, we're leaving. Danny takes off like a fucking bat out of hell. I never seen any he's gone bat out of hell and then the guy goes he's like putting his arms around me like you can't go and i'm like dude i'm leaving and he's

like oh i'm like oh okay so now i can't fight a bouncer danny's long gone he's already in an uber i'm already in an uber and then i go i go walk me through this what do you think's gonna happen right now i go what do you think's gonna happen you're gonna bring the boss out and then you have no cameras here there's no proof that i did it i go i'm gonna say i didn't do it and even if i did do it which i didn't i go you're gonna bring the car owner and then what he's gonna take my information then what sue me you think i'm gonna walk to the debit what what do you think's gonna happen you're not calling the police you can't call the police but this guy has like first day energy where he's like,

I just feel like I should be holding you. And I'm just talking. He's not even listening. He has the ponytail with the undercut, like that look, that security, like undercut. Yeah, he had the whole. And my energy was sort of, I wish a motherfucker would call the manager

so I can continue. You know, I was. Yeah, Ryan's like, I'd like to talk to you about the price of these drinks. Yeah, I was in Karen mode. Well, we got the manager here. The drinks are fucking $25. That's the thing.

I was sort of in Karen mode. And I'm just like, okay. So then eventually he's standing there. And then someone else, he gets a call on his walkie talkie. Like, we got a fight on our hands. And I go, yeah, so what? Were you going to stand with me for two straight hours? And the guy takes off.

And I get over there. And Danny's crying in the ditch. Like, did he get you? Are you okay you okay no i came back at the end okay so this article is called here are the reasons you need to add pegging to your relationship and this is like the bare bones you know if you're not even into it and she says what if i told you that you could easily have the most intense toe-curdling organism of orgasm of your life? The only thing is you have to put something in your butt. The whole thing's pretty late.

Wait, is this an ad? This sounds like a scammy ad. Yeah, it really does. This sounds like, this sounds like the copy for like, you know, that ad where it's like a finger with Vaseline on it, you know, that thing. And you go, what am I looking at right here? It's a sort of a sophie's choice a little bit too where they go you have you have you have uh red button is the most toe

curdling orgasm have you ever even that's it it's always sort of like the girl thing too where they sort of you know how girls sometimes it's all like have you ever been that where you're having sex and you go, I turned into Arnie sometimes. How many comics have that joke? I'm like Arnold when I come. I'm like Arnold when I come. Danny DeVito. But yeah, you go,

cause you're going, it's not a tumor. They're all basically the same deal. I mean, not exactly the same, but that's the girl. Honestly, you want to do something funny?

Actually, it's like, so I've never had a toe curdling orgasm but i have recently this is a recent this is like kind of funny but like i've started getting headaches during like right as i'm about to come i should get like a migraine that's the most old man shit ever i do i literally was like oh i'm getting old like i so you're you're about to finish and then i just get this fucking migraine like as i'm finishing it's only happened like a couple times but it's only since we've been on the do you think that's your brain saying since we've been on the trip since i've been in miami you want to be with guys maybe maybe it's like god is like smiting me for fucking this like not being a homosexual it doesn't seem like something he would do but

dude the first time i got it i go oh like because you know you hear about people just die during sex or whatever and i was like oh, is that just like a brain? My girls usually die after sex. You know what I mean? Yeah. So they can't rat. No, but I was like, am I having a brain aneurysm right now? So she says, calling everyone who identifies as a man, don't let preconceived gender norms

impede a good time. don't let preconceived gender norms impede a good time. Also, you know how, um, there's that theory, like they, they want to put a black man in a dress always to sort of like to emasculate them.

It's almost it kind of that now where it's like, they want every guy to be emasculated. So then they can sort of prove them right where they go, look, we're exactly the same. You know what I mean? It's like this push push where they go every guy needs to like take stuff in his butt blah blah and then and then they look they go oh if we're not exactly the same then why are all these guys getting fucked right i love that girl be like so do you like anal she

was not a huge fan but you definitely should take yeah you should definitely take it you get it they go think of me as your sexual fairy godmother. I've done a lot, maybe too much, so this woman's very sexual, of what some may consider unconventional sex acts. Knife play, BDSM, butt plugs, roadhead, which sort of... Roadhead and knife play?

I love how those are in the same combination. You go, hey, baby, you want to give me a roadhead? Or, you know, I could just put a knife up to your neck while i fuck you you combine the two well i simulate a rape i had a girl that i used to date that um they used to be into me trying to like uh rape her so you'd be like doing stuff and she'd be like yeah yeah and then and then she'd pretend like she didn't want it like uh she did the first date actually yeah, yeah. And then she'd pretend like she didn't want it. She did the first date, actually. No, but then she liked it. So then she started to be always wanting to do that.

And I go, so what? Every time I have sex with you, you're pretending that you don't want to? And then I remember sometimes in the morning, I remember I put my foot down where it's in the morning and then she would sort of grab me and then she would be like, then push me off. And I go, okay, I'm not, it's like 9 a.m.

I'm not raping someone for your gimmick. Yeah, just so you could get off. You know how they're like talking, I think I read where like in Australia or something where they were talking about like consent passport, like an app, you know what they talked about before where it's like an app where you have to give consent. And then like,

that'll just like those girls, like it's over for them. Cause even if you're like, okay, just do consent in the app and then we'll pretend rape. And she goes, well, but if I do consent in the app,

then it won't work. She goes, my brain, like I can't just forget that I gave consent. They have to all sort of give the consent like a week before or something. Yeah. Way in advance. Like you consent to,

maybe you consent to like a random time in the future. If you're like that yeah yeah if i can complicate it out for men it unlocks a mind-boggling level level of pleasure that you haven't discovered before would you like to unlock that danny so when a woman pegs her male partner she's hitting the p spot over and over and that's where they that's the prostate so they what and what is he doing he's just jerking off no here just you just take it like you're on the bed i mean but nothing's going on for the d just that's well that's the thing they're basically saying you should just

be a gay guy yeah you're on all fours and you're getting this mind-boggling orgasm allegedly from her smashing your p spot with a but you're not even getting a reach around or anything how would she reach around her arms aren't long maybe you fucking did a little stretch armstrong or something on the other hand it's about the mental aspects of women julie margo coo so they're saying women might enjoy this too explains that women get psychologically aroused from the power exchange it's like a whole new sense of dominance that the normal positions can't give. So you're basically COO of what?

She's this. Yeah. She's a COO of hot octopus is what it's called. Okay. So basically how it works for anyone who's wondering you're on the bed, all fours. And then she, you're on the bed,

all fours. She's got a dildo on, which is empowering her and she's saying i'm the queen of the world you get any dudes are like you know what i want to get pegged but i want to be on my back yeah that's for sure yeah that is like i'm sure gay guys do it like for sure i mean i've had you know with a girl like that she pegged me like that well first things first it takes time to prepare to do anal before you ever even think about having the sex you basically have to have the anal talk so now what's that it's a conversation you need to have beforehand you know what did you eat and

you're like i had fucking so much beans last night spicy food i assume that's what the anal talk is yeah the anal talk goes there's gonna be shit everywhere what are your thoughts on that um yeah she walks in with the pegging thing do you want to do the anal talk yeah let's do it you want to do the anal talk create a sexy environment feel free to break out the wine throw rose petals on the who's throwing how emasculating do they need to be the chicks throwing rose petals on the bed. Who's throwing? How emasculating do they need it to be to see the chicks throwing rose petals on the bed before she fucks you in the ass? Like, imagine the dude's like, why do I need rose petals?

Like, if we're going to do this, like, why do I need the rose petals and why does she need the rose petals? Imagine, yeah. This isn't a rose petal kind of thing. You come home, you think she's cheating on you. Like, why is there rose petals in everything all over your bed?

Open up that fucking ass. What? Bend the fuck over. Throw rose petals on the bed and do display to your, and then do foreplay to your heart's content. All of this stuff is just, so now, so basically she's like, if you're a guy that likes getting fucked in the ass, this is how it works. We have like a romantic evening with wine rose petals and then we do foreplay for 45

minutes and then you're like so you took away the one part i do like and then you added so you replaced the part that i like with me being fucked in the ass yeah exactly but we you know you know maybe you have an expensive dinner that maybe they take maybe you have An expensive dinner Maybe they take Maybe you have An expensive dinner You pay for Maybe the man's In lingerie

That's really A mess Maybe you hook up His balls To a fucking Car battery Who knows So you come home

There's rose petals On the bed You have a glass of wine You eat her out For a while And then You put the lunch It's just you eating her out that's the foreplay you put

which by their uh calculations will get your ass nice and wet for them that's how biology works right here that's so funny the idea of like is your ass getting wet but you're not you're not touching them you're just like oh i'm so wet right now what it's like what you're like oh did you didn't you hear when we had the anal talk i'm so fucking wet right now what my asshole is dripping dripping wet anal squirting okay and then give reassuring compliment this is this is what they're saying it is give reassuring compliments tell them you love them and respect them wait the woman's saying this to the guy as she's pegging him be like i respect because she's saying you know his fragile masculinity won't be able to

i can't take but like as she's like feeding it to you she's like she's like bite down on this ruler i respect you i respect you imagine i love you so you basically have your legs behind your head and then she's she's fucking she goes i love and respect you that would be worse than not like if anything you probably want to be like degraded a bit if you're that guy if you're that guy like don't tell me you're respecting me if anything tell me like this disgusts you i agree you're that guy yeah you're like this disgusts me that you're like this but i'll do it because they're trying to mix it is really that thing where they're just like what if we just and because you basically are like there's no such thing in girls and guys that's the hypothesis that they have essentially or then they're trying to make come true and work backwards so they're like and we either make girls like guys or guys

like girls or what if we just fucking make a we try to make a mixture of the two where it's like we know you're still a man you still respect you yeah you're still a man i mean obviously rose petals on the bed if your boys found out about any of this, they probably wouldn't have any friends anymore. But you're still a man. Do you respect... The fact that they think you'd want that too, it's kind of like you're sort of on all fours. And then you kind of look back like,

do you respect me? You respect me, right? You respect me, right? I've hurt so much. You respect me, right? So painful. Okay. Kiss them, caress them, and make them feel like definitely caress them definitely the back of your hand against their cheek gently as your so it says make them feel like a king

that's i think like king of england just take it in the ass like the king of england like the saying just like the saying you got fucked in the ass like the king of england so you're a bit yeah you're you're on all fours now row his pedals she's saying that she respects you like because you're a king the respecting part is the best go on king go on king you know it's mostly something you're doing i'm just gonna sit here and take it. You're a king. You're a fucking king, dude. You have a crown on? Yeah. Why are you wearing the crown?

She puts the crown on you. Oh, shit. So, yeah, you're getting caressed, like, shh. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's the time where you should be like, can we pull that consent thing back out again? I don't know. Midway through being like i'm good

can i fuck you in the ass you're a king you're a fucking god dude let me finish you go what dictates you finishing what constitutes you being done it's just when you just had enough cry your hips are tired well i cry or your hips are worn out like she a bad hip She's like I'm gonna get a cramp in my hip Oh fuck There's a boring part right before this So I don't want to read the whole package But they basically she says She's going on about how to hit the P spot

And she's like So what you do is when you're in there You'll be able to feel like a little bump And that's where you want to see But you're like're actually talking about feel with the dildo yeah exactly feel with what

so you want the girls to feel around you become it's not like hitting a pothole in a car where you're like tonk tonk you're like

oh there it is what are you talking about oh there it is and if there was she's fucking drilling like that is very true though what constitutes her what i i will say she's not finishing she's saying you're the king's finishing the king's finishing so she goes are you done yet you haven't touched my cock the king has come yeah the king but it's the king has come i'm cooming out of my ass and then she says so when she now she's

saying about when she did it she says what was it like for me awesome she wasn't that she liked it i heard noises coming from him that i've never heard before so she was good doing this for the guy which made me feel like a goddess so she's He had a piece of duct tape over his mouth and a knife to his throat. So it was hard to decipher. The noise is like, ah. He's like, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm. What kind of guy ever? I mean, I guess if I was being like fucking literally just drilled in the ass and wearing lingerie.

I think there is some extent where I might be making some strange noises. And she's interpreting that. I mean, I guess the guys who are into that are just like a shriek maybe some sort of a shriek i mean imagine if you've been pegged you're like you're you're shoving shit up your ass on a pretty regular basis that's the thing she's probably because yeah this girl is like oh uh the guy's all oh i've never done you know yeah oh is that a dildo yeah the guy's all, Oh, I've never done, you know, what's that? Oh, is that a deal?

That was kind of small. Um, yeah, he's, he's like looking at her every time she leaves, you take her computer and look up all the pegging stuff. So it shows up in her browser. Totally. You mess with her internet browser history.

So she only gets pegging stuff. Oh my God. And so she feels like a goddess now well one of you you know it's either you're the king or she's the goddess well or i guess you're both goddesses but goddess is higher she's like but you're both good but you're a king and you're like what's higher than a king is goddess yeah i have to feel i have to say If I'm lying in rose petals I don't know how much Is there any reference

The very most appraised Of this I don't want to skip ahead But is there any reference Of the feces Or the smell at any point No cause when she said The pee talk

Or that we need to have The anal talk That's just She was talking about Should we do this Right It's the equivalent But like is she like

Hey so here's like The cons of this It's gonna smell like shit yes well that's the thing I think if you're a gay dude you know

you gotta fucking you know essentially give yourself an enema every time you go to the club yeah yeah that would be the

but I honestly thought when she was like you need to have the anal talk I thought for sure what she meant was you know you go do this enema I am

before we do this you know like just make sure you like clean yourself out i'd be like this conversation is enough that i'm already out yeah i'm good but yeah so they don't mention anything about the poo which would get all over the rose petals maybe that's what they're for is to clean up and the rose petals are sort of absorb the feces yeah the pieces yeah you can make a little paper mache out of shit. That being said, it is a king's shit. King shit.

So maybe the servants will clean that up. The king of England. And she said, pegging is what your relationship needs because it gives a new sense of trust while keeping your sex life spicy. It does probably give a sense of trust in the sense that you'd have to have

a lot of trust that she's not going to tell anyone. Oh, that's a big one. Yeah. Yeah. What happened to the good old days when you just fell blindly backwards into someone's arms, you know? I know. Now you just got to get pegged. Well, they're trying to... You know what? I was having sort of a thought the other day

that it's almost like to some degree with a lot of things, women and men are playing like a game of chicken. Because, okay, even with like this sex stuff, girls are kind of like, we're like crazy. And then there's a lot of guys there. It's like, I guess we'll see. You know, there's some dudes there. Like, you know, these girls are like, gets the Rambo knife out of the sheet.

I guess like sharpening it and fucking right. Cause it was whittling a stick. It's like, I guess we'll see. Yeah. Like those guys exist. You know what I mean? Yeah.

Where she's like, um, Oh, I'm into, you know, really crazy stuff. I'm this zany sex blogger. And you go,

Oh good. And then she gets home and you go, you will open up the closet. Like there's dudes who are, and I think that the punishment chest, right? So I's even with that with the boyfriend stuff like there's sort of this version of like this is what i was saying that city girls in the city are you know one a lot of them are doomed to be unhappy too because they kind of have this idea like you know i don't like need a boyfriend or whatever right and a lot of lot of them maybe, um, you know, whatever,

that's fine. But like a lot of guys, Mo way more guys are like, yeah, yeah, let's for sure. Let's do that. Like every girl I've ever been with, it's like, Oh yeah, I'll be single. And like within six months they're kind of like, so what are we? And you're like, I thought you didn't care. So yeah, a lot of girls are kind of, they try to put it out there. Like, I don't, you know, yeah, I'm just like a single, you know, I don't need a boyfriend. All the guys in like any major city, you're kind of like, yeah, for sure. I'm down to just like do this forever. Yeah.

I have no biological clock. We can do this. Yeah. Yeah. Right. So I think that is putting a lot of girls in. How many times do you think there's girls who are like, yeah, I want a really crazy partner.

And he's like, okay, I want to shit on you. And they're like, all right. Yeah. That's what I'm saying. So I think these girls that are saying I was pegging him and he's like okay I want to shit on you and they're like alright yeah that's what I'm saying so I think these girls that are saying I was pegging him and I felt like a goddess

and the guy's like you know she's like oh you're I'm into this wacky sex stuff and the guy's like oh okay I want to shove a thermos in your ass yeah

while I shit on you yeah while I shit on you with a knife like there's some real pervs out there and the knife and you go hmm

yeah that's a lot of things at once I saw i can't remember what it was but it was like some like senator or whatever it was but basically because of the gender neutral stuff or whatever they're like you know they legalize uh transition therapy for eight-year-olds or whatever the fuck it was and they're like this is a big win and he was like uh they're trying to cut off eight-year-olds penises they're just a bunch of perverts now that's how you fucking yeah yeah it's like sum that up he goes they're just

bunch of bunch of pervs yeah it's like that's a pretty funny take um did you see there was um this i think it's i don't know if it's a band or an artist, but his name is Finia. Finia. Okay. Finis. Finis. Finis. Finis.

Yeah. Who's that? Billy Eilish's brother. Oh really? Yeah. Oh, so he's like a big star too. He's a huge star.

Yeah. He won a bunch of Grammys. So he wrote, he, he wrote the other day. Like redhead dude. Oh no. It's the guy. his name is Phineas

Okay So he wrote On the internet He wrote If I hope that He goes If BTS

The Asian band Have you seen those guys They have like 90 members Yeah Yeah it's pretty funny The K-pop band right? Yeah yeah yeah And they're like

One of them commits suicide Like every six months Really? They have There's a lot of deaths in K-pop. It's a tough life, man. All that fucking Asian pussy. They're fucking.

All that pixelated pussy, man. It's fucking. Woo. My friend, my friend, my friend. They fucking. So he goes, if BTS gets Corona, the stans will find a cure. And then basically they found that he posted that. He retweeted that.

Okay. And basically the idea was that he was saying like, because their fans are so, you know, these guys have such hardcore fans, they'll find a cure. That's what he thought he was retweeting. So the internet exploded on him. Basically being like, what, you think just because they're Asian? Yeah, that's what they said.

It's a, oh, you're making it. Oh, just because like because like oh once it becomes a problem in asia then they'll find a cure i mean they do have a literally yeah which you know maybe that was the joke maybe it wasn't but my point was so this guy got full the full cancel treatment you know what i mean you're the enemy or whatever and it was the same thing as before we were talking about but he posted he goes i'm so sorry i didn't know what that meant and thank you so much for holding me accountable i'll do better and all that stuff but i was just like i know a lot of people post that stuff but it's like it is such the epitome of the cult mentality imagine being you know imagine any scenario where you did something and it was an accident and you think it

was an accident and you still hold the belief like but i appreciate you guys yelling at me and ruining my life and taking my sponsors away i deserve this thank you it's like well but you said it was an accident you're like yeah but i shouldn't be i shouldn't be allowed to make yeah exactly i should be punished for my accidents it's like i don't i don't deserve you know i'm held to a higher essentially what you're saying is like i should be allowed to make accidents. Yeah, exactly. I should be punished for my accidents. It's like I don't deserve... You know, I'm held to a higher... Essentially, what he's saying is I should be held to a higher standard than a regular person

because I make pop music. Because I write pop songs. And you're like, okay. You know what Gilbert Godfrey said the other day? Or he said that... What did he say? Aflac! He said that basically everyone... What did do you say let me get the quote right

but he basically said that the whole world's turned into your wife right now you're just always apologizing pretty much yeah you're famous enough that's why the whole kevin durant thing's pretty crazy i actually saw like people don't know michael rapaport's just getting michael rapaport but then i saw like bleacher reportort. But then I saw, like, Bleacher Report was, like, Kevin Durant goes on, like, homophobic, misogynist, like, DM thing. And, like, he didn't really say anything homophobic other than being, like, you suck dick. Like, you're, like, you...

But he didn't even say dick. He might have been pro-sucking dick. But he said, like, figuratively suck dick. Like, oh, you suck all these fucking guys' dicks because, like, you're trying to, like, you know. Yeah, he's saying you suck up to these guys suck up to these guys oh it was yeah it wasn't in the context there's no context of like that's a homosexual thing no but maybe it's a misogynist no because you could say that to a girl because you're sucking all these guys dicks

for sure but is it but then they're like oh he's home and they're like and then yeah people like it nobody cares yeah can you imagine like the black community being like oh my gosh don't go after michael rapaport you call him michael rapaport gay not the tv correspondent for the big three league that's a bad day for michael rapaport though because his whole deal is like i'm a you know the black i'm like an embrace by the black community he thinks he's like fucking gary owen or some shit yeah, he definitely, what do you call it, transitioned into like a weird 60-year-old. Yeah, because I guess he's like a New Yorker,

so he's got that New York swag, and he just never lost it, and he just wears his Yankees cap. My friend lost it. Yeah, as long as Trump was in office and he could just have these viral clips owning Trump. That's what it's all that goes back to that thing where it's like those guys. He basically was the I hate Trump guy.

I think I could be wrong, but I think I heard that he was the number one guy on Cameo. He had big cameos. Rappaport was the number one. Really? By revenue on Cameo. Yeah. Interesting. Yeah, I think so well now he might be even more of one

yeah with the fucking heat that he's getting from this but i thought it was funny you were saying when we were talking about uh because i was sort of saying you know the idea that some of these guys that they were you know their entire thing was the trump guys and then they they transitioned out and we were talking about like a mutual friends we have and i was like what's their these idiots dealing you had a funny take you're like i mean i kind of see some of these guys as like victims yeah they're victimized not a rap report but someone who was like a real like you know nobody entertainer then was like people were kind of interested in them during trump because they were just like trump reply it was it's it was the positioning of there's certain

people that were you know a little bit famous or important enough that they weren't just off the radar where they could say whatever they want yeah so they really had to cow tail to this stuff yes but then but then it didn't look against them's against them. They were like in a cult. It's like you, they were like the NXIVM girls. You're like, oh, like I feel bad for you.

You're like, you got wrapped. There was like this, the new Obi-Wan movie or whatever. And like one of the girls in it, the new Star Wars movie was like in NXIVM. And they're like, she's like,

she's a victim. They're like, oh yeah. Even though you did like this fucked up shit. They're like, I don't mean maybe not them, but like, they're just like,

yeah, you're like this victim. And yeah, because you got roped up in this whole thing if you're like you know 40 years old and you sort of have this career like i'm not gonna uh throw my career away to go say what i feel like now it just seems like not the move so they're stuck being like yeah i think there should be you know less men on this project you know what i mean they kind of have to you know yeah you're right there is too many like men in film or there is too many men in this department of my work yeah and because they if they can't be like the guy that says that because there's

too much stakes for them to just walk away for sure you know but they're also not set they're not stars where they can be like they it's easy because you know you see a lot of like big celebrities are like there's too many men you're like yeah you know that's not affecting you it's easy to be like there's too many men because it're like, yeah, you know that's not affecting you. It's easy to be like, there's too many men because it's like, you're still getting cast. That's what I'm saying. They're the in-between. If you're Ben Affleck and you go, we need more men,

you go, you know he's still working. Yeah, he's fine. Yeah, nothing's working for him. Matt Damon could go on all of, he could go on literally the diversity world tour. Exactly. But if you're like the 15th on a fucking call sheet. On a writing room.

Or a writing room, you're like, yeah, you're like, yeah, okay. You writing room or a writing room you're like yeah you're like yeah okay you're not getting hired now they're like they're gonna take that to heart you're like all you're doing is like just kind of speeding up your demise that's exactly what you're doing yeah but you feel you'll feel good about it along the way yeah you're speeding up

your demise and then yeah you just you're like boxed into such a corner those people also think they're like well if I fight for mike myself in this regard then i'm a bad person so they're like they don't know what to do they're like i guess they're just fucked yeah they're just fucked they're just like i hope because they're like oh yeah yeah they hope this passes but they're like yeah if i do if i try to defend myself then i'm like i'm the thing i hate so it's like and once it passes by the time it passes they're already too cooked oh for sure the four months of of that mental turmoil i think it it really broke some of these people oh yeah oh yeah they're not gonna know how

to like they're gonna be hope like just hoping for scraps and then like the thing is yeah they're just gonna have been past the like like you know they'll just have been like i don't know yeah they just became you know you're just the guy in the office that when he started he had potential and now it's 15 years later. You're like, Oh yeah, that guy still works. I still hear it.

It's like, he's never up for a promotion ever. It's like people like him. He keeps to himself. It's like, you know, yeah, we don't really know much about his personal life.

Exactly. You don't know much. It was like, yeah, it's like some people are like, maybe he's gay. Like, yeah,

maybe he's gay. He moved into the basement for a little bit when we had like the office yeah we're not just doing those it may be just milton just milton um but there was a funnier one with in the comedy so there was this there was this asian improv troupe that they have a show that's about like improv there's a show about improv right is one of the words in the name of their title rice? Like do they do have some sort of pun or something? Maybe.

Pun? But they're not all Asian. But the thing was, so it's kind of complicated. My point is that these people kind of take these complicated issues and they don't understand them. Because the gist of the thing was, the Asian girl's in the improv troupe. And then she starts doing her like asian mom accent and then they go oh that's great you should do more of that so then she's now in the improv troupe she's playing like the character of like an asian and then she's having like now i

feel like they're laughing at me not with me do you know what i mean and they're like you started it yeah you started it but it kind of my, which is, I think a little bit complicated. It's for one, it's not that there's a, if they want to make it as like, oh, I can do it because I have an Asian mom and that's the reason. But this is in the context of either looking at all that, but you're really, the truth is it's like, yeah, selfreciation is cringe when it's gross. And when you're making fun of someone, it's mean when it's too mean. So you're trying to find the balance.

It's like it just switched. And you go, yeah, they're two different comedic devices. And the truth is when you're – I mean, it's a device. That's the thing, too. Self-deprecation is like that is a comedic device. Like if you start on comedy, you start watching people and you go,

Hey, like if I'm like, you know, kind of floundering, I can make fun of myself and get a laugh there. Yeah. You can't just be like, all right,

that's all I'm going to do now. Right. Because then you're like, you, you, people see that you're taking advantage of this trick too much. It becomes like, it's not novel.

And then it's like, it like becomes a gimmick. And then it's like, it's not interesting anymore or whatever. It's not funny anymore. Cause you do it too much. Yeah. And that's essentially what happens. You're just like, you're like, Oh, it like becomes a gimmick. And then it's like, it's not interesting anymore or whatever. It's not funny anymore. Cause you do it too much. Yeah. And that's essentially what happens.

You're just like, you're like, oh, I found this little gimmick. And then you just fucking put your foot on the gas and then you go the other way with it. Like, and, and human interaction in general is kind of messy. Do you know what I mean? It's like you walk into someone like, what extent do you make fun of them? Like, well, how well do you know them? Like how well, you know, it's's all there's a million things right and they want to kind of break it down to well

here are the rules if their mom's asian they're allowed to do this accent and you go one drop rule it is one drop rule but if you break it down you go it that's why if you look at all those rules where they go you're allowed to do asian accents on stage because your mom's asian be like well but why why would that be the case because if your mom has an asian accent but you're you don't have one so you get to make fun of immigrants because you're related to one so what if it's your adopted mom and you're white can you make fun of your immigrant asian mom's accent and you go well no it's not because it's your mom it has to be the same race and a different accent like yeah you have to look like the person the truth is it's like it's a fucking scenario you go who are you talking to what's the

deal how well can you make this joke where it's all i mean obviously anybody can like yeah like anybody can i don't think it's that obvious to everyone no no not i mean it's become less and less so for sure and the thing is it's always like people who are like not super funny who are like having to put all these parameters on them and be like oh that's not cool like you know there's also something with those people where it's like, you can see the venom when they're, when they're, you know, when people are actually mad,

but they're trying to joke around. Yeah. I had a good theory where I was thinking a lot of the biggest problem with those people is, and I've talked about this a little before, but I have a better theory. Okay. So I think that the best way to do comedy is you almost do it more.

Right. So what they do is these people are actually mad. You know what I mean? They're like, and then they try to pretend they're like, not they're mad, but not that mad. They're just like,

I mean, whatever, like another white man, but they're actually really mad. Yeah. Whereas it almost would be, it would be funnier if you were like, pretended I'm,

you know, if you look at like the best people, even the ones that yell and scream, the, they almost even pretend they're more mad that you I'm you know if you look at like the best people even the ones that yell and scream they almost even pretend they're more mad you know these fucking people

like you're almost it's kind of if I was with my chick or whatever right and I was like pissed off about my that my I got scammed

on the fucking dinner or something like that and I was actually mad about it right I'd come out I'd go these people are fucking like you'd act really mad I'm like obviously i'm not that bad but i

am pissed yeah that's like that you almost over whereas they would kind of be like i mean you know whatever it's just kind of these restaurants they're passive-aggressive yes passive-aggressive yeah also the thing with the accents is like they're like also mad if someone's being like successful like say someone's they're not successful and they're asian and there's like a white comedian who is successful doing an Asian accent, they're like, he's taking my success. He's taking my thing. That's mine. There's only a certain amount of laughs that can come from that. But he's like, the money he makes, he makes X amount of dollars, 5% of his act is doing Asian accent, that money's mine.

That's how they think, though. They're like, he's taking that from me. And you're you're like no that would have never been yours yeah that was never on the table for you but that's just like the feeling of how they like kind of think about it it's like he's taking like i could be the asian i'm asian like there's a pool of jewish jokes that's my right to be an asian accent person like i'm asian and then this guy who's white it's like he's taking that from me would you feel like that If you saw someone getting famous, like, you know,

doing Jewish jokes and being like this motherfucker, like, yeah, I'd be like, I go, give me my commission. You know what? Uh,

the, the, by the way, I watched, uh, just this clip went viral, uh, recently,

like an old one of Trump on Fallon, Trump, Donald Trump on Jimmy Fallon or no on conan and he's talking trash about rosie o'donnell yeah and i was just like man that guy has insane comedic instincts yeah yeah yeah oh yeah i think we were you're telling me i think i might have told you about in the car so basically what happens is he comes out and then he goes uh conan goes so what about what's going on with this feud with rosie o'donnell and he goes you told me you weren't gonna ask about that and then and then the producer he's like no

i go when he goes in backstage he goes look at your producers right there was that and it was it's very like the comedic instinct is to call out everything as it's going it was very like that's exactly the perfect way to have handled that he goes listen i'll answer your question but let's just be clear what happened right so he's just dominating that like scenario and then they go you know i went on the other thing i go they asked me about rosie donald for 50 minutes and then i come off and they go why does this guy keep talking about rosie you guys keep bringing it up i mean whatever and he goes do you think would you ever be friends i go i don't think she's capable of being happy or something like that and it was it was you know it was kind of

before everyone hated him so probably everyone was like yo trump's the man before he got into politics yeah but it was funny to watch and it was kind of i go man reiterated the comic instincts on that yeah yeah i wonder if he's gonna come back like a kinked up garden hose of jokes just like fucking like if he's gonna have like an hour on kinked up garden hose of jokes, just like fucking like, if he's going to have like an hour on Biden when he comes back. Apparently he, so I saw this one article that he, like if he's been writing every night,

like he watches, he watches the news and he goes, I'm not going to remember. I'm not going to forget that sleepy Joe. Yeah. You know, he does the thing that you write it when you're sleeping, you wake up and he goes,

Oh, I got to fucking write this down or I'm going to forget it. Right. Yeah. And then he looks at his paper in the morning. It's a sleepy Joe underline three times. What was that? Sleepy.

I know. What was that? All right. He, he did a, there was someone getting married and he was invited to the wedding. No, he probably,

yeah, I saw that he dropped it. I didn't watch it though. Yeah. So he dropped in at someone's wedding and then did like a hour-long speech about biden how he's a cuck and stuff it's amazing he just has an hour in him though he has multiple hours i think he's off the cuff yeah no that's off the cuff like his some i'm sure some of his campaigns and stuff were like those were prepared this is not prepared he's like just chilling at mar-a-Lago, his resort. They go, oh, there's a wedding over there.

And he goes, oh, you know, I'll fucking make their day. We'll drop in. Yeah, it better be the right people or you're not going to make their day. I don't think there's no fucking being like Libs being like. Not being like at Mar-a-Lago. It's the only place. Yeah, man. You have to get married at Mar-a-Lago.

Fucking hate. You hate Trump. You go, I'm going to be so pissed if he drops in on the wedding. Yeah, you couldn't be bummed to be the former president dropping anyway that is very true if you're getting married to mar-a-lago you're probably for the cause yeah so yeah he dropped in and just does an hour but it's funny it's like you know he doesn't even know the grooming bride he picks up the mic and he's just like these fucking libtards joe biden's old and he can't even walk but that's the thing we were saying before because i got asked to do you know some of these like fox news

places are you know because tucker carlson essentially does like a fucking comedy monologue he has nine writers that are all comedians or whatever and people are asking me and my friends because if you're some of these other places like late night they don't want you know some of these troublemaker comedians and some of these they literally do all their casting in like a planned parenthood fucking waiting room they go hey are you getting an abortion you know to write a joke you want to write for camel you want to write for you get an abortion first one second come on. You know how to work a kite, Brayden? Yeah.

Well, these people at these places, they're kind of looking at Tucker Carlson, and he's doing his late-night monologue, and every late-night host is like, wait, you can do that? Yeah. You just hired 10 comedians to write a bunch of jokes for you? Yeah.

I think soon you're going to be seeing Sean Spicer essentially being like, you know, word of essentially being like you know word of the day yeah word of the day they're gonna be doing yeah whatever the leno thing was oh yeah you have the typos yeah actually janet said this do you want to hear a funny i don't think i told you this so i thought it was probably one of the best synopsis is ever but so tucker carlson is constantly an appalled dad yeah and um stephen colbert is like an appalled mom kind of yeah isn't that accurate i never stephen colbert has very appalled mom vibes right now yeah like oh he was so good on colbert report too i know he's good on a lot of things. But imagine this. Like they were a parent and the kid got kicked out of school.

The dad would kind of be like, what did you do? You know? And then the kid's like, I threw a stapler at the wall. And he's very appalled that the kid could do that. And then Stephen Colbert would kind of be like, I can't believe this school. Like the mom, she'd be be like the school's kicking you out Like you know You're the victim here

He'd be the mom Yeah that's pretty fucking accurate I haven't watched Stephen Colbert I can't say I've watched Stephen Colbert in like A long I don't know the last time I've seen him It's like hard to watch It's like

Not watching Colbert No but even like to just be like what time I've seen Colbert. It's like hard to watch. It's like it is. Not watching Colbert. No, but even like to just be like what's going on in Colbert just to freshen up. And then it's like it's like difficult to watch. It is difficult to watch. And the clips that he posts, even if you watch clips, because sometimes you'd be like, oh, what's he up to? And it's you turn it on. It's like, and another thing.

He's orange. He's like he's been in office for three months yeah and they think that this democracy you know he's very that's the one thing too with the kids in cages stuff that's going on right now and i go like because i was very much when trump was in office i was like none of this like the president doesn't matter and then like it's just all the same shit and then you know people be like oh really the president doesn't matter and then now with the kids in cages thing i'm like yeah the president really does not matter yeah i've never been more certain of that that the president doesn't matter i was kind of even

thinking about that for you know we're making this movie and all the sketches and everything it's like what an advantage you're at if you don't give a shit who's president if that just that simple if you don't care if like if literally it's not gonna really make your day one way or the other you're starting the race at a fucking mile ahead oh yeah the only way it would make my day for a president is if it was like the rock like that's fucking sick we're like the rock the rock could be just like the biggest cock and then it's like he would but it would be cool for a bit but it's's not, it wouldn't even make my day. I don't even, yeah. Like it wouldn't, I don't, nobody could be president that I make.

No, you know, it would be the only scenario would be like legit. We like Chris rock or like, it was like Chappelle and some sort of like crazy American people, American people, American people. It's like, if you were pumped to watch fucking like, you know, Trump's like, if you were like, Oh, Trump's about to do a thing a thing it's gonna be say some crazy shit like imagine if it was like chappelle having to do his fucking like uh press room or whatever like i don't know imagine if dave chappelle was the president i was saying that i was like it's literally a sketch where he's the president it was pretty funny sketch okay so this was probably the craziest one That I saw going around And it's Stepmom justifies

Exposing breasts to kids Because she's a feminist And she got charged with a sex crime One for the boys Yeah one for the boys They saw a titty And she's a sex criminal Yeah they get rid of her

And they got to see the titties You think it was a bad titty though? She was arrested in Hell yeah It's not a hot feminist This though. She was arrested in... Hell yeah. It's not a hot feminist. This isn't like Mila Kunis. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's like a fucking...

Like where she had to like take it out with both hands. One tit. She had to remove the single tit. Buchanan was arrested in February after prosecutors said she exposed her breasts to her stepchildren several years ago while hanging drywall in her garage with her husband. So you look over, they're just, I don't know why the kids are there,

but you basically look over their drywalling and you look one way, you look over one of the things where she's reaching up and not wearing a bra, you know, like that. And then they just hang it out in the here. Yeah. She's got the shirt on South Park.

Miss jokes. She's Miss jokes on dick according to her she said her and her husband both stripped down in order to not get their not did not get their clothes dirty all this one in the all this excuse in the book that is one of those things though when you're like when i always say these kids these people are making their the kids are so fucked or whatever but basically marcus you know what i mean from the mom sketch but you look over and your companions are like okay come in we're doing a family like drywall session or whatever and you're like can i just go hang out with my friends no you got it we're doing the drywall get your clothes off yeah down here and you look over your fucking dad and your stepmom are painting naked and you go this what is my life yeah this is fucking

you're like this is not although if I did if the mom wasn't gross and then you find out that your boy has got like a fucking decent mom that just pulls the guns out I'd be the most popular kid in the school hey all my friends at school want to help we could

probably get this whole house drywalled in a fucking afternoon if you guys want. Drywalling in the garage. Hey, Mrs. T, that way you can drywall. You come home, your friends are helping your mom drywall. Yeah, I can frame the house if you want, whatever you want. She said when Buchanan's stepchildren

asked why she'd taken off her shirt and bra, she explained that everyone should feel comfortable walking around topless in the privacy of their own homes with other people's kids, though. Nightmare mom scenario right mom scenario right there i mean first off if your mom is hot it's like even worse you're like there's all this like you're like okay so i want to bang my stepmom like well if it was your stepmom and she was hot and you were like 12 i think you'd a little bit be like nice nice yeah i guess right i've never had a stepmom i don't know that But if you're that If you're the kid But Yeah yeah of course Again but if you're the real mom You're just like What the fuck Yeah

Oh yeah If you're the real mom You're like what the fuck Yeah every time I And if you're that drywall Ugh If Like what is going on in here

So Yeah she says The privacy of your own home You know it's one of those things too Where it's like the women with we should be able to let's push laws that we should

be able to have our tits out and all that stuff and you go okay the problem is with all this stuff and some of it's probably the arguments against the trans bathrooms or whatever but it's like women are just so fucking naive sometimes where you're like yeah i understand that you're saying step parents should be allowed to be naked in front of kids but let me tell you it's like and you're right maybe the biggest threat

isn't a pair of titties but if we make a law that step parents can now get naked in front of their kids it's gonna be about 15 days i find that hard that it's a like a tit she got charged with a sex crime for showing her tits not vagines so maybe the vagene was out too it had to be the vagina because it's like i don't think a tit is getting you fucking locked up in the club imagine you went home and you're drywalling your stepdad had his dick out yeah well they said they both got naked they but yeah fully naked i understand that but it's like you know so she got charged so it is illegal so this did get charged but the idea of like like i have a stepdad if i was went into his garage and he was

like hey you might have passed me that brush there you think he just has the fucking the belt on but just naked totally naked like the side felt he goes he's got the belt and a hard hat yeah just the hard hat with some beers yeah tool belt and totally naked just a mo dry in the hand yeah and you go but that that's what i'm saying with people taking advantage of it it's like it's just like like you i can picture like so many girls i know being like what's the problem and you go okay i I hate having to be the fucking one. That's like, it's a slippery slope, but you go, if you make a law that step parents can get naked and then they're like, well, also, why can't your aunt be a, why can't the aunt have her tits out? And you go, okay, sure.

But the aunt probably isn't going to be the one of the aunts and uncles. Like you're like, yeah, let's make a law that uncles can be naked in front of their daughter in front of their niece and nephew if they make a law where you go you're allowed to fucking pull them out in front of your niece what's the big deal yeah but it's the same kind of thing i mean that's probably less weird if you lived in a family like if you were like swimming or something or something it's almost less weird to see an uncle or aunt maybe naked than it is to see a non-blood relative. But again, they're both weird, but I can see. Yeah, it must be the bottomless thing, though. In September, a feminist group won its legal battle to get the local city council to remove language from public nudity code,

barring girls and women over the age of 10 from going topless in Fort Collins, Colorado. So a win for feminists that 11-year-old chicks can have their tits out in the town square. There was another feminist mom that was basically Marcus, and this one says, Mom convinces teen son to carry tampons in case his female friends have an emergency. He's going to fucking get tons of pussy, or none ever.

Well, that was one of those things where but it's like what but what's the emergency it's like where it's the actual like oh you have a like blood or is it because like yeah that's the thing if you're like young no girls ever like going to like just yelling out does anyone have a tampon like they're embarrassed by it but it's the mom patting herself on the back being like you know all these chauvinist men running around but this is what you know guess what my side and he's like he's like can i can i get some condoms too she's like no no just tampons can you imagine like yeah you're in high school human tampon dispenser i'd kill your friend you look in his locker and he's just got like tampons literally if they're tampons you gotta be like if you want to try like you know appease your mom and be cool at school

then you're like oh no this is for vodka i, if you want to try, like, you know, appease your mom and be cool at school, then you're like, oh, no, this is for vodka. I fucking dip in vodka, stick them on my ass. You know, just like the boys. No, no, no. These are for the dogs. These are for the dogs. These are tampons for the girls. I mean, if the girl wanted one, she could have one.

But these are for the dogs. Yeah, that is the ultimate of like, if your mom's like, you know, and you should bring tampons for girls. And you're like, mom, I know you're going through this like feminist thing right now, but I assure you, this is not the move. I'm telling you, I have to go to that high school. You don't, you're 50 and you're going through this wacky shit. You're probably on some Facebook group where a bunch of you mothers are patting yourselves

on the back for women. But it's like, yeah, for getting rid of the tax on fucking tampons. I assure you that if I go to school with a box of tampons that I hand out to women in case they start bleeding, I assure you that will not make my life easy.

It knew. Unfortunately, Elijah was mocked a bit by some of his male classmates. But some of the others thought it was... I love how this is like in the news. He was mocked a bit. He was mocked a little bit classmates but some of the others thought it was like an indie news he was mocked a bit he was mocked a little bit but some of the others thought it was cool so apparently

some of the kids at school were like yo some of the other yeah yo honestly respect bro respect bro that's cool you know these people don't know and then she said my teenage boys helped me shop today which included buying their little sister's first bra because breasts happen. So this mom So this mom is really giving herself like a pat on the back sort of situation. Oh I mean what else? She has to do the pat on the back. This is like just part of why she's doing this.

Yeah these people are. I know what I should probably mention too is the Frank D'Angelo thing. Mm-hmm. Yeah. Did you watch the movie yet? No, I didn't watch it, but I will.

You can't. Did you rent it? I'll buy it for any amount. You tell me. But did you? Tell me when to stop paying. Yeah. Did I rent it?

Yeah. Or was it just on Amazon? Yeah, I bought it on Amazon. You bought it on Amazon. But it's on the Amazon Prime where anyone can put their movie on Amazon Prime yeah yeah yeah I know that like you see a lot of people

like promoting oh I got this movie yeah you go oh I'm now on Amazon Prime and you're like yeah how'd you get that? it's like I signed a form yeah I signed a form

and just uploaded my fucking mp4 so yeah I did a whole review of the movie I told Danny to watch it but he doesn't want to because he's like too cool for watching bad things, ironically. No, no, no, no.

You're too cool for irony. I'm the OG Frank D'Angelo. I've been more obsessed with Frank D'Angelo than anybody. I used to watch... I used to get home from... I'm stealing my shtick right now. Are you kidding? I used to get home from fucking stand-up on Friday nights,

and I would watch live episodes of Being Frank on CHCH in Canada. I would literally turn on fucking flip it to CHCH channel 10 and watch. They're incredible. It's amazing. It was one of the best. It was like I would sometimes I'm not even exaggerating finish a

set and people would be like I would be like I gotta get home just to watch. Get out of here. Yeah. So how have you not watched the movie then if you're such a D'Angelo head, if you say, I'm not, dude, he has 45 movies.

I can't see them. You can't, you're still how you're still working. My, I watch them all three times too. So I've only watched, I got to watch Sicilian vampire one more time before I even think about it. I want to watch the joke thief.

It's like the last big save. Yeah. Well, I mean, I feel like I watched the last big save just by you explaining it to me. I go, I was like in my mind, I've seen 45 minutes of real time hockey play men's league.

So in my, I was talking to my dad, I got him on my dad's into this too. He likes it. And then my brother, I told you, so I got my brother to watch it and he messaged me being like, how the fuck am I supposed to watch this?

He made me go, how the fuck am I supposed to watch this? I go me go, how the fuck am I supposed to watch this? I go, sick, right? And he's like, no. Like he's not. Yeah, he's not in trouble with that. But so my dad, and I've been talking to him

about Frank D'Angelo a little bit. And he says this to me the other day. He goes, you know, I played hockey with him. I go, excuse me? I go, are you kidding me? Why wouldn't you ever bring this up yeah he goes yeah i used to play so he tells me when he was when he was like 30 so this is when frank d'angelo was just the apple juice guy yeah he used to play hockey with frank d'angelo

and frank d'angelo is a goalie and he's the worst goalie ever. And he says, Frank D'Angelo would pay people to be on his team. So every team was, it was like decent level, like men's league hockey. And every, every game would be like two, you know, two,

three, three, four, like whatever normal hockey scores. But he sucks so bad. But then he would pay like junior hockey players, like 200 bucks a game to come plan his team. So he said every game would be like 10,

nine. So he said he would look at the scores and you go be two, three, three, four, 10, nine, 11,

12, because their, their team was so much better. So they'd score 12 goals. But if you got 12 shots, you'd get 12 goals. I go, what are you kidding?

Why would you keep this from me I would love to just be in a room With Frank Angelo Where someone told that story Hey yeah you're the fucking men's league guy And he has to be like I don't know what you're talking about Yeah so he's literally

Playing men's league You know the level of crazy you have To fucking be To like to pay money to rig a men's league game that's yeah that's pretty next level just like it's like cheating at solitaire yeah yeah like on wednesday night and you're like you're you know you're fucking calling agents up yeah who you got available like that's what he's and he's it's cheating at things when no one cares and yeah nobody cares and everyone no it's like you don't even get to brag you're like yeah we killed you and you're

like you let in nine out of ten shots you had brent gretzky on your team like we all know who that is crazy um tell tell them about the snowblower thing oh the feminine oh this is so good so uh this comedian who i know who lives in finland um messaged me we talk like here and there or whatever he's like uh he's kind of like the finnish jerry seinfeld's opener i thought you guys people can be the finnish jerry seinfeld no he's his opener but he's a good guy um he was like he sent me this thing it was like this official bulletin from, uh, I think it's called like Tuka or something.

It's like the third largest city in Finland. And they're doing this like feminist, um, snow plowing initiative where basically they're like, uh, snow plowing is like unfair essentially to women because women are like, because they, they plow the highways first because that's just the logical thing to do.

Yeah. Right. Cause they're like, you know, larger arteries and then they do like, uh, the side streets next. And then,

but it's like more women. So it's like buses are like, I guess more impacted and then like women slip more and stuff. And then women have to do like daycare. So like, it's having all these like knock on effects or whatever. So they're trying to do this. Like he's like literally literally he was like laughing so they're saying it's sexist because they plow the

streets the least that women slip on men are more likely to drive on the highway and women are more like you have to walk and like take the subway or whatever the trams so and they and they slip more because they wear like high heels i guess they don't say that specifically, but they do say that women slip more and fall as because of the weather. So then they're like they need a more feminist like centered like snow removal strategy. And so they're and like and he's also like the whole government in Finland is like super feminist. Either like the prime minister is like a woman or whatever. Yeah, it's very much a girl country. Super girl country.

So they're all into this bullshit. So he's like, yeah, so I guess they're like trying to do this now in like the third largest city. But he's like, they did this in Sweden in 2015. And it was like a disaster. He's like, they did this exact same thing where they were like saying this exact same points. How like the snow plowing was snow removal was like you know didn't consider women and it was just like more of like yeah and then everyone was like what happened so they like crash on the highways yeah there was like there's

people were getting stuck on the highways and like all this nonsense and he's like he's like they did this it failed it's like pileups on the highway it didn't make sense in another scandinavian country recently. And so fucking, I know. And then they're like, they just have to do this fucking feminist. I mean, Oh,

incredible. Good shit. And the last, uh, quick thing is the, so this, we talked about this a little bit last week. The idea that,

you know, the, a lot of the people, like a lot of conservatives are sort of getting like a taste of you know telling people what to do and they're they're liking that taste yeah with the you know the canisones and all that but i kind of felt like it was interesting with the little nas x thing because all these things are kind of like you know so this guy released his shoe and it was like okay this is the devil's blood or whatever yeah i feel like a lot of people are having trouble like how to navigate this and basically what he did is he just bought

this shoe modified it yeah he put some you know but he's just modifying a shoe that you can buy exactly he made a thing but i guess it was kind of messing with religion and people really did blow up on it you know and i guess that's what you want he's like you know i'll do this thing yeah like they're never they weren't gonna buy it ever anyways it was like the thing with the kaepernick where all these people were like burning their fucking nikes and like right they're like and those people just wear nikes now like and it's a big publicity thing and i don't even know what happened maybe he retracted or whatever but it was kind of like in my mind a little bit we talk about this on stage like making fun of you know christian like it was feeling very you know for a while you go it better be a really good joke

because you can't just be like barista raping like yeah you know it's got to be in you got to be a really good version of that joke because there's no punch no where certain topics you know the fact that you even tackled yeah it's not forbidden where people are like oh i can't believe he's not at all about this yeah but then i would have thought i would go you know you put some shit like that out no one would care and it feels like a lot of people really cared and i've sort of had the same experience where i like did something about religion and recently and that was one of the most things that i got people fired up about again and people so it's almost like now everyone's just mad it's like it's like it used to be it kind of was going

away that you know no one cared about this bullshit but then it was going away that you could uh you could kind of make fun of all that stuff and now it's like now everything's just off yeah it's just like you know there's nothing that doesn't get people fired up. You're either getting called a cock or a fucking Nazi. Yeah, as long as you're willing to go out on the edge. As long as you're on the edge. And the middle stuff is like you kind of just go unnoticed. You can do your thing if you want to just exist in the middle.

But if you want to try and be edgy in any way, I guess. I don't even know edgy. I don't like the idea of trying to be edgy. It's not that you're trying to be edgy it's that you're trying to like tackle taboo subjects yeah which he wasn't he was like no he i mean the fact is he's a smart guy no that was the old fashion you know i'll do this thing and they'll you know get all these people worked up and who cares and it'll sell a lot of things yeah which i i guess it was always there is something to be like okay christians are mad at them doesn't it's not the same punch as being called racist no

like if you're like a white celebrity and the internet's calling you racist oh yeah that's like you're that's the worst yeah that's like existential crisis almost it's a real crisis he's like yeah i'm gay i don't like fucking he's just like yeah i'm gay and I don't like fucking, he's just like, yeah, I'm gay and whatever. But so you're right. It's funny though. So their madness doesn't have as much effect. Yeah. But it was as many as much madness. Do you think,

do you think because it's the modern version of this is like mom, like, you know, church moms are like, where's your fucking file of that old town road? I'm deleting it. I can't break the CDs. No,

they're doing the opposite. Like delete the file yeah because you can see it is it all changes so quick but i could see why people would like roll their eyes at it because you go okay the same way that i would see okay imagine some feminist mom did like i'm making a new shoe and it has a vial of like squirt juice in it or something it's like oh I'm sorry is that a problem and you go okay but then a lot of people take the bait you hit the nail on the head

taking the bait and I honestly credit to Lil Nas X because I think he knew that that would happen or he was at least hoped for that they take the bait I probably take the bait sometimes yeah everybody does we all take the bait sometimes I've said be like I probably take the bait sometimes yeah for yeah everybody does but I think

we all take the bait we all take the bait but you do have to I know sometimes I've said this before with you where we talk about something I was like who cares like this is

sometimes there are things where you seem like they're being like done only for the sole purpose of just like riling people up on one side or another yeah and it drives me nuts that if

you know yeah because you'll see these things that's what that's a perfect to go back to our Cardi B I know we never really like cracked it but that's what it is is go they're doing this so you get and you go and then you get mad it's like this thing just every the whole world now is people just doing stuff and every every no matter what everyone getting mad and if there's a certain critical mass of people getting mad then it gets amplified where regular people

find out about it because like how many shoes was it what how many shoes was it a thousand or something i didn't really follow the future because i saw a few different things some of it was like he retracted it and some of it was like it was never really a shoe ever but well my point is that it's like i i think it was for sale but it's like it or maybe a pre-sale but like it's probably like a limited. He's famous enough. He can sell out a limited run of shoes. It was almost like a goof for fucking Instagram. He can easily just sell out a limited run of shoes to his fans, and you never hear about it unless all these people start making a stink about it.

It's like, yeah, he sold 2,000 pairs of shoes, and you're like, it's not worthy of hearing about that. The little Oz X sold 2,000 pairs of shoes. No, you're right. We shouldn't care or know. Or know. We shouldn't even know about it. I shouldn't know this it's just then fox news and oh you know like probably all these like conservative sites were like can you believe this it said six six six on the side

of the shoes and you're like okay yeah and to go back to our conversation fine be that person but then don't fucking uh you know i liked when i went to that conference and then they go what do you think about how you can't joke about anything anymore i go okay but don't now you don't get to post that little nausea exactly exactly and the nerve of yeah either fucking one of the other buddy yeah exactly and you're like and again it's like you don't even care about the shoes you just like being upset you just like being mad like it's like there is this is like they just like being mad about stuff it's like you're not losing like this is all our shot across the bow in the culture war that you fucking little nas x made these shoes like yeah you know it's not like oh but like that's there's you know there's gonna be 50 less christian people now and we're

losing members of our ranks. It all is the joke, and we're going to do it in the movie, but it is that you're triggered. You're freaking triggered. You're triggered. You're a snowflake. You're a snowflake. Yeah, exactly.

You're freaking triggered, and then you're like, you're both triggered. Yeah, you're both triggered. Exactly. But liberals, yes, we're more triggered, and you're giving them a good fucking run for their money again. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And also, happy Passover.

Thank you. We were slaves. You were telling me that. On behalf of the slave community. Yeah, yeah. We were saying that the idea of like a black guy talking about slavery and Danny goes, I agree. It was bad because we were slaves for a lot longer.

We were kind of well, well before you. We were slaves first and for a lot longer. Yeah, we were slaves for a lot longer and for we were kind of um well well first and for a lot longer yeah we were slaves for a hundred i don't know i don't know i actually do recall these years actually jews were meant to be slaves for probably a while though probably a hot minute well we're talking to we're with joe because he's in miami and he he's the guy that uh he's the booker for the stand and we had lunch with him and his family's the full deal oh yeah they're like yeah so they do the thing orthodox where it's i do the joke i do jokes about jewish loopholes which i'm going to try to do something about this but he essentially they you're not allowed to have bread in your house so they you're

supposed to they started where you sell your bread for someone then buy it no no no no no no no no i was like this is one of my things no no no it started where because you're not allowed to have bread in your house so it started where like because like it says in like the whatever like Torah is where you like you have to get all the bread out of your house and you have to go like you hunt for it you find every crumb and it was literally like you throw it out your hands and knees hunting for bread crumb crumbs not even exaggerating like you're like and you're like you have to throw it all out yeah like that's like you know all your beer, anything that has yeast or leavening or whatever, you throw it out.

And then Jews were like, this is crazy because it's eight-day holiday, right? The money. Or seven days. So they're like, we're not throwing it and then you have to go rebuy it all at the end of it. We're not throwing up this much money's worth of bread. And it's just, even if it's not the money,

you're like, what, so we have to go like shot? Not the money, this guy says. We? On a completely, so we're like because, you know, not the money. This guy says we on a completely. So we're going to throw out five hundred dollars worth of bread. I'm on a completely unmonetarily related point. I think this just might be an inconvenience. Yeah, just throwing out a pallet of bread. No, it's usually thing is it's usually. Well, you know what it actually is.

It's normally it's expensive because it's like liquor is like when you're like, OK, yeah, this is getting costly if we're just dumping all this liquor down the fucking- That's correct. Or whatever and all this stuff. But so, yeah. And then someone figured out a loophole where they go, oh, this is what you do is you just put it in like a drawer, like a closet or a box, and then you go to your non-Jewish neighbor. You sell them all of your fucking, like, so you go, you own all of my bread and all this stuff they

your neighbor has to give you a dollar because jews like are like yeah you like you know like number one thing in uh contract law is you have to receive consideration right so you have to receive the dollar if you don't how you gonna have it you know if you don't get the dollar you're like you did you own that bread and that's your problem still so then you have to have and you know a week before passover especially you have to go to your neighbor and be like i need you to buy this bread well that's the thing he was saying moving in like one thing if you do if you're moving in beside north of the dogs jew like understand a few things that they're gonna make you come over to their house and turn their lights on and turn their lights on and their stove or like buy their fucking shit and they're gonna

make them buy their bread but you if that's the thing i was saying is like your neighbor sells you all this bread for a dollar and then they go to buy it back and you go what you didn't realize is i'm also jewish yeah and i put that bread on i put that bread on amazon yeah i don't know i can't sell you a fucking i sold you that bread i can't sell you 24 fucking uh stella's back for a dollar that seems a little on the low side i don't know yeah they sell it to you for a dollar like sell the bread okay we'll sell it back for a dollar a dollar 24 stellas 35 bucks 35 dollars a dollar what do you need four dollars for you want to buy my bread for a dollar no no i'll buy buy my bread for a dollar why do you want my bread for

eight dollars you go go the reverse. That would be funny, though, if you come back after Passover, you go, I'm just hankering for some bread. Here's that dollar back. You go, price has changed. So yeah, that's what we were saying. They commoditized it. That bread's trading on the fucking NASDAQ right now. They securitized all the bread.

We securitized your bread, pal. Yeah, it's fucking you selling options. Okay, so better than that is now these sites yeah there's a site this is a this is really this is so funny but this is the equivalent of saying that like the christians are like you have to go to church once a week and then you can turn a room into your house to a room called church so as long as you're you stepped in that room you technically went to church because you have a church in your house fuck what is the word for this i'm sure your your listeners know this but it's uh in the catholic church they used to like in back in the day they used to sell

like instead of body of christ no no no no no it's so it could because like you had to like do all these like you know hail marys or whatever like to get into heaven and then people were sinning and they were literally selling vouchers to like relieve you of your sins but they were actually no this is a real thing fuck people are probably listening to this being like um vouchers for catholics well the uh the well in the jewish one so basically what happened was and because they were like well all this neighbor business is getting business so that other jews started a business where you can sell your thing to this site for a dollar but they charge you five dollars indulgence that's what it's called indulgence yeah an indulgence so you could buy an indulgence literally like an indulgence you see you're like i'm i'm

gonna sin and you buy a voucher from the catholic church to sin right and you go you go home and you murder a guy you go do the sin and you go luckily i bought this indulgence and it balances out but it's like the catholic what's the sin like if you're gonna cheat on your wife whatever no basically the priest wants a taste if you're gonna do some bad basically but that's what happened is because people were like sinning so much that they're like we need to offset the books but it's okay this is like this is to offset the books but so this is like this is like pre like you know whatever this is a long time ago like hundreds and hundreds of years ago that's when like the martin luther like lutheranism started because he's like this is

bullshit like what do we just he's like wait so we can just sit all we want we just pay some money to not do it and then the guy who's getting the money's like shut up i learned this on the hardcore history dan carlin about the lutherism But he's like yeah this is fucking bullshit He's like this is not what we're supposed to be doing We're just sinning We just sin all we want And then we just pay the Catholic church some money for it Well yeah so Joe

Instead of finding the neighbor They basically go to a website That's like a bread buying website But then you pay them But you pay them for them to buy it off yeah and you go at some point you go this can't possibly be it can't possibly be intended for it's like so you take all your bread you put it in a thing also now you go to this website and then you pay a guy to give you a dollar and he owns your bread then you get your

money five like someone's good but also like this is all being done to outsmart religious guys here but you're out you're doing this to outsmart your own religion god like you're literally outsmarting it's not like a book like some vague book god wrote this book yeah you're doing this to be like god but that's i think that they think like god's probably like because the rabbis are probably in on their on their operation too so they think god's gonna be like nice work dude yeah yeah well you know what it is is like jews complain obviously and so probably like for a five thousand year or whatever 500 years jews were like we're not really selling all our get throwing out all their bread and god goes or the rabbi's like you know

this is like this is how it's written and then eventually they just wore. And the rabbi's like, you know, this is how it was written. And then eventually they just wore the rabbi's... One hip rabbi. One hip rabbi. Because Jews are all about... They wore them out. Yeah. They wore out their names to the rabbi.

And it's all about the precedent, right? It's just like modern... It's law precedent. Yeah, it's the Western legal... Holy shit. So it's like then they go... There's one rabbi who set the precedent and goes, look, you can sell it to your neighbor.

And then everyone's like, all right, done. And they're like, we can sell it to your neighbor. And then everyone's like, all right, done. I'm like, we're selling it to our neighbor. And then they were like, what if we don't actually sell it to our neighbor? And then one rabbi who was really old was like, whatever. Because the thing is, I know Jews who are like, they pack up all their bread and they bring it. It stays at the neighbor's house. They do the whole thing. It stays at the neighbor's house.

And then they were like, well, you know what? Why are we bringing this over? Let's just, you know what? It'll stay in my basement. You own that square of my basement for a week. And then, and I'm sure he was like,

okay, but we got to draw this up on paper. And then they're like, I can't shakes fine. And then it's like, and I owe you for the dollars. Fine. Like,

and then they're just eating a fucking, like a big Mac later that night. And they're like, I love it. It's so funny. Oh my yeah anyways happy passover thank you okay this has been the boys guys ryan long at ryan long comedy danny jokes at danny jokes on all platforms punching down podcast cool video coming out next week that we filmed in the office here. And thank you for listening. Tell a friend and post a screenshot on Instagram and Twitter

and stuff if you like it and leave a review. I feel like I don't ask for that stuff that much but do that and we're making big changes coming in the next few months. I'm getting a studio in New York. Lots of cool shit coming up. So tell a friend and do all that stuff if you

like the podcast all right thank you peace