The Boyscast with Ryan Long - Whip Your Hammer Out Boys - KAFLUMP

Episode Date: April 10, 2020

Cuomo is so hot, no more empires, sex in corona, whose more racist, They caused toxic masculinity, woke shit made old hacks relevant,  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

And you can tell our friends, and they can have my things when we're dead. We're gonna live forever. We're gonna live forever. We're gonna live forever. The Boys Cast with Ryan Long. We're back. Thank you for tuning in to all the boys. We're here. We're still alive. We're here. We're queer. So get out of our way. That was my first remembrance of the gay pride parade. I was eight years old and we were driving through and some gay guy came to the window and he yelled. He goes, we're proud. We're gay. So get out of our way.

At that moment, I knew, get me a dick. I need to be gay. But thanks to my gay conversion therapy, I am now straight. Although my brother is gay. So if you're out there, if you're the we're proud, we're gay, so get out of our way guy, know that it worked.

The women's march is getting shut down from coronavirus? That is a bummer. Because if there's one thing about women, they like to plan years in advance. So you know they've been getting ready to getting their pussy hats all ironed up, getting the felt ready to make more pussy hats, putting speeches together. And then now it's canceled. I had a joke that I was working on before this stuff stopped standup comedy until the end of time. And now I'm unemployed. I don't know if you guys have been to the women's march, but what happens is the women march from one side of the city to the other side of the

city. Halfway through, they forget something and go back. And then they turn around and they finally finish the march. And then at the end of the march, they all find a husband and live happily ever after. It's a weird tradition, but this is something that's happening. Do you guys remember a simpler time? Do you remember a simpler time where everyone was just coming together, holding hands to yell at, just to yell at a kid for smirking, had a smirk on his face and everyone knew. We could just, we're just a nice group of people. We can come together and just agree that a 14 year old kid should be put to the electric chair for his smirk. Now we don't know what to do. Celebrities are singing. People are singing on the internet with John Krasinski. John Krasinski, there's no man in the history of the

world that they've tried harder to make a leading man and it's been unsuccessful. It has been the most, there has never been a more unsuccessful campaign than to make Jim from the office a leading man. Every time there's a new movie and it's like power man, and it's Jim from the office, like rolling around in ditches, the guns are shooting them. And, and you're like, no smirk at the camera. That's what you do. although I feel like his new show is doing pretty good hey round number 95 is the charm Jim John Krasinski when Hollywood makes his mind up on who's gonna be the hot new guy they do not give up Justin Long had like 95 bombs before they're finally like all right I mean can we can we agree that Justin Long isn't sticking as a leading man?

Remember when there was a pretty good stretch where their hot new superhero was the third rock from the sun guy? But he was robbing on Batman. Joseph Gordon loved it. They pushed him hard. You'd see him on one day. He'd be on Jimmy Fallon lip-singing. He'd rap lip-singing to Eminem's 8 Mile just to prove that he rapped there's nothing lamer than when celebrities are trying to prove that they can rap do you know what I mean like

you see a celebrity on Jimmy Fallon and he's like you guys might not know this but I actually have a hidden talent where I'm a rapper and he comes out and he's like hypocrisy Socrates and you're like who gives a shit who can't rap anyone has like, anyone that's reasonably good at anything can also rap. Anyone that can play guitar can also rap. It's barely a skill. It's barely anything. That's why I always think it's so ridiculous when there's these celebrities that, you know, or the rappers that kind of come out.

You know, because every trend eventually is like, these new rappers. Back in the day, we could rap. We were the real rappers, these new rappers. They don't even know about lyricism. And you're like, guess what? What you're rapping about is also not hard. Like if you actually cared about music, you'd be like, you know, real music is this guy who's like this piano virtuoso, not this guy, not the guy who has the best rhymes he's the best rhyme schemes like snoop dogg he's like these new mumble rappers it's like you're barely a musician like there's nothing wrong with that i don't think music has to be good i like the fucking ramones and they sucked a lot of my favorite bands sucked my band sucked when we first started

so what culture is about fucking culture isn't about how good you are at the instrument being punk or being the best rapper I thought 6ix9ine was cool who got out of jail for coronavirus my boy I remember reading about 6ix9ine in a meme that was like rappers these days be like this and I watched the song and I was like this guy kicks ass you guys can suck a dick you're old you don't know what you're talking about I'm old I don't think I'm fucking on the pulse of culture I think I'm fucking on the pulse of culture. I think I'm young for a lot of things. Maybe comedy.

If I was going to be a fucking late night show host, I'd be young. But I'm old. Music's a young guy's game. Touring in a band with a fucking bunch of 18 year old fucking chicks. Three of you sleeping on the floor of a van. Double teaming chicks together. That's a fucking young man's game. I'll tell you that much it's a

six nine i thought was pretty fucking cool snoop dog comes out he's like these mumble rappers six nine was fucking cool first of all snoop dog these fucking mumble rappers they don't even know back in my day we used to smoke weed any any guy whose edginess depends on him smoking weed, guess what? You're not edgy. Seth Rogen, I'm fucking, I heard him in interviews and he goes, I can't believe people let us say this shit.

And you're like, you're making dick jokes and you're talking about weed. Who is that unacceptable for? There's so many people where they're like, the fucking thing can't handle us. We made dick jokes. Everyone can handle you. Your jokes are fine. No one cares.

You're the same people that are on the fucking internet telling people to stay home now and singing. I thought of a pretty funny sketch would be a celebrity singing, but it was a song with the N word. And one guy kept getting the N word every time. Like imagine Jimmy Fallon did that. That'd be a funny sketch. Jimmy Fallon and his friends were rapping a song together, but every time it went to the N word, it went to Jimmy Fallon. He was like, could I get a different word? I thought that'd be a pretty funny sketch

for a celebrity to do. What is going on with Corona? You were watching your friends break down in real life. We're about two weeks away from your best friend's mom showing her tits on her OnlyFans Her wrinkly tits draping on the floor You're paying five bucks a month to see your friend's mom's tits as they boom, boom, boom, boom, boom They're hitting the floor because they're so saggy

Her saggy ass tits are on the floor and you're paying five bucks for it Let me just tell you, you don't need a new project You know, maybe get good at something. Maybe, maybe there's something you haven't learned. Maybe it's a time for you to educate yourself. This is not a time for your new podcast, your new podcast, your new quarantine podcast, me and my wife in the basement. No one wants a husband and wife podcast. Stop it. This is, this is maybe the golden era of bad content. We're going to look back at right now and say, wow, that was, if there was a graph of bad content, the spike right now would be unheard of. An unheard of spike in brutal content.

You don't need to make a web series with your girlfriend. Stop it. don't you don't make me to make a web series with your girlfriend stop it just go on the internet like everybody else and tell and say that carol baskin didn't kill herself and be smug about it too the more smug the better let people pretend say carol baskin didn't kill himself but with the attitude that no one said that before that you thought of it put it out there like it's an independent thought that's what i want to see right now on the internet. I want to see stock thoughts, just hot takes that everyone said a million times, but with the energy that you just thought of it. That's what I'd like. And I want you to fucking, and your hot takes that aren't true. If you're a girl, maybe go up there and say,

Cuomo is so sexy. I saw the other day, there's this guy, Anthony Fauci, some fucking old man. And the girls are like, he's, is he, is this the new sexy and 85 year old man? Is this what's hot now? He's got a diaper on and I can smell it. Is that what's hot right now? Shit leaking out of his diaper onto my leg. Is that the new sexy? Is a bald guy with a ponytail a new buff young guy? Is a guy that's too old to have an earring but still does the new sexy? It's very funny to watch women on the internet just try to redesign things. Just these engineered realities, as Patrick called it. That's what it is. They're saying, is Cuomo sexy? No, he's not.

But maybe he is. Maybe he is sexy. Maybe 500 pounds is sexy. Maybe the fact that I'm a 6 out of 10, maybe that's the new hot. Maybe nothing's real. Yeah, maybe this 80-year-old fucking dork-ass politician, maybe that's the new hot guy in the world probably that's probably what it is that's the takes i want to hear from you i want you going

on the internet wait till someone else says some random guy's hot and then copy it be like cuomo's my daddy too tiger king's wild talk about how tiger is wild. And then to top it off, I want to hear your hot takes about how the government should crack down on us. Me personally, I think the government should give us a bedtime. That's what I want. I want the government to say lights out at 8 and drop off everyone a mandatory nightcap. That's what happens. mandatory nightcap. That's what happens. You have your fucking American government Dr. Sam, Uncle Sam, or Dr. Sam, one of the two. It's Dr. Sam now in the coronavirus era because Uncle Sam's also the doctor. That's what I want. I want you with a fucking nightcap on, government issued,

at 8 p.m. begging. In China, that's the best when people say, in China, they dealt with it better. Yeah, in China, they welded people's doors shut. In Sweden, guess what? They didn't do jack shit, and they're doing all fine. The more this thing goes along, the more I'm suspicious. Two weeks ago, I was a little like, yeah, it's a little weird.

Now I'm like, something, I don't know what's going on. Listen, I'm not fucking, I'm not a researcher. I'm not something I don't know what's going on listen I'm not fucking I'm not a researcher I'm not on the dark web I'm not Edward Snowden I know something's going on I don't trust it I don't trust this one bit all I know is that I would like to see military presence on every corner I'd like to walk outside of my house. I'd like a government official, potentially with an AK-47, telling me, this is where you have to go. The government's out here handing out money. People get such a boner for redistribution of wealth. We're all welfare queens now. With all this money that America's spending, it might have to start giving up its empires. Maybe America's going to have to give up its shadow governments in the Middle East.

Maybe China's going to have to give up its shadow governments in Africa. Maybe Israel's going to have to give up its shadow governments in the Middle East. Maybe China's going to have to give up its shadow governments in Africa. Maybe Israel's going to have to give its shadow government up of the United States of America. We're all going to have to make some sacrifices. Maybe 20-year-old girls are going to have to give their shadow empires of running the media. BuzzFeed, CNN, Huffington Post, and Washington Post? No more 20-year-old girl opinions for you. Nah, nah, nah. You gotta come up with it on your own. Can you imagine a world where the traditional media doesn't get to defer to the oh-wise opinions of the 20-year-old girl?

The lifeblood of the media. Fresh off reading an edition of the Communist Manifesto. Huh, HuffPo? What would you do without your lifeblood of the precious resource of 21-year-old girls' opinions? 20-year-old girls are giving up their empire. Because if there's anything we learn from Jesse Smollett that anyone involved with an empire can't be trusted,

the TV show Empire. And yes, that joke was a little bit of a stretch. So yes, there's a lot going on with the coronavirus, but really, you should be out there figuring out how to make this about you. You know? Figure out how you can make this about your depression, feminism, trans stuff, race, being disabled. Maybe make it about how everyone's racist against the Chinese,

even though there's probably no proof of that whatsoever. And Chinese people are never racist. Chinese people are so racist that they're racist against Chinese people that basically have the same skin as them. They have to get a paint swatch out to figure out who they're racist against. How great is it how much white people just love racism as long as it comes from anyone other than white people? You know what I mean? Because white people just, oh my God, you gotta be careful. You can't say anything bad. And then the Chinese people are like, I would never let my daughter date a black guy. And you're like, that's their culture. I get that every time I see like some brown guy or Chinese guy going like white people are so racist. I'm like, yeah, I guess there's more racist than me and my family. Your dad. How about that?

You know, who's racist against black people? You, your dad. I bet your grandfather. You know who wasn't racist? My family. Me. I don't give a shit. That's why Jews are more sneaky with the racist because they're like, no, it's not, we're not a race. It's a religion. I just don't want my daughter to date anyone that's not Jewish. And you're like, yeah, but all the Jewish are white people. And they're like, oh, are they? I mean, I didn't even notice. And yes, I know that some of the Jews are not white, but all the Jewish are white people. And they're like, oh, are they? I mean, I didn't even notice. And yes, I know that some of the Jews are not white, but you get what I'm saying in the context of modern Western society. Now, coronavirus, you're at home with your fucking stupid bitch girlfriend.

Boys, boys cast. You're at home with your fucking naggy ass bitch girlfriend. She's fucking nagging you I found an article that wants to tell you What you can do about your sex life There's nothing more important than getting your dick wet I'll tell you right out of the gate I'll tell you this

This is my advice to you for your sex life This is what I think This is what I think you should do during the day. Do as much work as you can during the day, whether that's learning something new, if you can do your work from home, whatever you can do. And then at night you should be crushing puss. And if it's your, if you have a girlfriend you live with, you should be getting drunk with her and having fun, whatever. Get drunk, watch TV with your fucking girl and if not like ignore all everyone on the internet that end up news that's telling you to stay home and just not go get puss if you're single

and you got a little fucking roster going maybe you're fucking cruising through tinder get that pussy for the boys and if you're a girl and you're having the boys guys relayed to you, let them come over. Don't fucking tell them. Don't let them tell you what to do. Let them come over. Let them bring his hog. Let them unravel the hog.

Go flump. Go flam. Because all the boys, all the boys listening to the boys guys got massive fucking hammers. Let the fucking boys from the boys, guys, got massive fucking hammers. Let the fucking boys from the boys, guys, come over with their massive hammers and fucking tear you a new one. de Blasio says the military is going to cut your dick off if you leave your house.

You got to leave your house like James Bond. Do you know how little I give a shit about this? I've been just bopping around. I did street interviews on the street last week. That's how little I give a shit about this? I've been just bopping around. I did street interviews on the street last week. That's how little I care about your rules. Suck my dick. If you're old, stay in your own house. You stay in your house if you're old.

And if you live with someone old, you stay home. Everyone else has to stay home because you're old? I know four people that had the coronavirus. It was like the flu. It's done in a week. They're back to normal. And I can't do stand-up comedy now huh this is what bustle.com says what to do with your sex life the cdc recommends avoiding close contact fuck the fucking cdc which is the cock dick sucker

corporation i assume fucking sassy today. Woo! We're hyped up here at the boys' cast. Corona can eat the boys' ass. Suck our dicks, coronavirus. The CDC says that. By the way, this is the first time that fucking a lot of girls probably seems fun again. Because remember when it was fun? Remember when banging a bunch of chicks was actually fun before feminists stole it from us there's nothing that girls are better at than

making something not cool and i'll tell you what if they actually harness that they could get really get what they want because you know there are some girls that understand that men decide culture way more than girls but like when a band's cool and then like certain like a few girls kind of like it but they don't try to make it a girl's thing but that's what happened with like fucking a bunch of bitches it was kind of fun it was kind of like a cool thing forever and then girls are like we want to we're fucking a ton of i'm we're all sluts and you're like whatever i guess i'll get a girlfriend then because you ruined it i guess i'll fucking have to get my boys to smell my girlfriend. My finger after I fingered my girlfriend,

which is far less fun. The CDC, what the CDC is involved in my sexual escapades. You know what I mean? It's like doing a fucking acid trip. The way that Silicon Valley guys do. It's like when they got involved with fucking drugs and they're like, what you do when Tim Ferriss started administering your acid trip and then you have a guy there that's like walking you through it to make sure you have the

revelations. You took all the danger out of it. There's nothing they do better than take all the danger out of everything. That's why we say about comedy. It's like all the best comedy actually kind of needs some danger. And as soon as you take the danger out of it, it's like, all the best comedy actually kind of needs some danger. And as soon as you take the danger out of it, it's nothing. You're just fucking goofing around. It's nothing. Remember when smoking weed was cool? Now it's medicine. Now you're taking medicine.

Instead of being like a guy that was doing drugs, now you're an old man taking his fucking daily medicine from your cabinet. Man, do they know how to make something not cool to do. This is what they say. You can certainly amp up the dirty talk. Perhaps you discover you both love getting it on using voice notes. Okay. Don't, black guys, there's no one that loves voice notes more than black guys. You don't want to have sex with voice notes. I mean, you should have dirty talk in person because you should be in person. Can you imagine how much of a fucking loser you got to be? You're in your house by yourself for two months.

The girl lives like a friggin', you know, a 10-minute Uber away. And you're like, I guess I'll see you in two months. She's down to smash. And you're like, I'll see you in frigging August. Go to her house. Pull the hammer out. A cuff lump. That was one of me and my friend Paul's favorite jokes. Because you know how the black guys have their comedies all like.

And I was fucking, came over to this girl. Pulled my dick out. A cuff lump. And I was just hitting it like, to like, you know, that kind of stuff. We had a big good one saying, the black guy one-man show, but he still has to talk about his dick like that. So he's like, and that's when I realized I had cancer.

And I went to the doctor. The doctor looked me in the eyes. He said, pull down your pants and let me examine it. So I did. I pulled out my penis, a ka-flump. And that's when he told me I had cancer. So I went home, made love to my wife one last time. And you got the idea. You can't stop doing the things. So you don't want to have sex on voice notes, but I have a lot of grown men friends that use voice notes to chat. have a lot of grown men friends that use voice notes to chat it feels really fucking gay my fucking friend in his 30s big gangster dude from fucking ajax ontario suburb outside of fucking

toronto sending me a note yo dog what's up how you been man yuck yuck and i send him a text back and he's like yo rye what's okay don't call me Rye in a voice note. Dude, I have buddies that do that a lot. It's toned down a little bit, but in the Blackberry days, oh, man, did people love voice notes. You don't want to be having sex during voice notes. You send a voice note, and then you wait, and you want one. Oh, I'm stroking your cock. And then you go, yeah, your voice note?

I'm stroking your pussy. Okay, and wait for her to send her voice note. You don't want to do that. What do you mean? If you want to fucking do anything like that, just fucking, you can literally do a phone call, video phone call. Why do you have to send voice notes? What is it, 1945? Watching ethical porn together can help you keep the spark alive.

It can help you keep the spark alive. Ethical porn. It's just, the ethical porn is just a guy eating a girl out for the entire time. I would recommend if you're going to watch porn together, start with lesbian porn. All of these things seem so much better in person. Threesome with a girl is the only one that's like not hard to pull off. Even if you're into like, I want to fucking watch a guy fuck my girl. Even if you think that the idea of that for you probably is so much hotter than the actual thing. You're like, that would be amazing. and then by the time you finish you're like okay now there's a

fucking dude in my house the fuck do i do now or you finish first and you just watch there's a million things that are so much hotter till you actually have to do them you're like this it'd be amazing to fucking watch porn together and then you're scrolling through pornhub like what about this one you're like oh dick's kind of big on that one. Okay, and she's like, how about two black guys fuck a girl? And you're like, I don't know if that's for sure the one I want. The only one, like, two chicks, like, fucking doing stuff is just the only one that really fucking, I don't know. You find a guy and girl that kind of look like you.

Probably best case scenario is you put a mirror up and you pretend it's a porn. That stuff's so hard to pull off. This reminded me too, a couple episodes ago when a guy asked me about nudes. Someone was like, how do we get more nudes or whatever? And I was like, you know what a nude is? When a girl sends you a fucking nude, because I've had that like a fucking ton. Where a girl like literally every day sends you a nude.

And you're just like, leave me alone. Stop it. This is what a nude is. A nude, when a girl sends you a nude, it's like a leave me alone stop it this is what a nude is a nude when a girl sends you a nude it's like a fucking getting sent a government census report you have to fill it out and you have to respond to it and if you don't respond you get a follow-up being like you didn't get the census report you got to fill that out pup they're not it's you can't just see it and you got to write back and you go hubba hubba ifba and if you don't yeah you have to legally fill it out

with a list of compliments that's what a nude is it's a census report with a list of compliments that you have to fill out and send back to them no thank you told you it's the sassy cast today's boys cast is extra sassy you know what the problem is fucking every girl with their stupid

sex blog is right now it's because they have nothing to talk about it's like you're not really funny but okay let me say that in a second but the first thing is like everyone doesn't have to be an entertainer like every person in the world doesn't have to you don't need to blog like maybe you just have a normal job if you don't have anything to say and the only thing you have to say is you're like I guess I could talk about like some of the uh times I had sex in the past I guess I don't know I went on tinder and like met a guy and then uh we had sex and I guess I like a story that you should have

told two of your friends you're now submitting to articles and buzzfeed these are articles now advice magazine the first person art. It's like, you just don't have anything to say. You don't have a perspective. You definitely don't have like any grasp on culture or art or anything like that. You're not a musician. You don't have a talent. You can't sing. You're not doing standup comedy. So what are you doing? You're not making YouTube videos. You're not even doing beauty tutorials. You're not a fashion stylist. You just have nothing to say. So you're like, I guess I'll talk about the times that I got fucked. You know, you don't need to have a YouTube channel. You don't need to be a fucking writer. If you have nothing to say, except for telling a story

that maybe would have been interesting to one of your friends if they really knew you. That's what a sex blogger is. You have nothing to say, so you just talk about the same shit that everyone's done a million times. It's the equivalent of being like, hmm, I want to start something on the internet. And I'm like, okay, I guess I can just show my boobs. Honestly, if you think you want, you're better off showing your boobs. Because at least you actually are providing something for the horn dogs around the world at least at least you're at least if

you're showing your titties on fucking only fan you got your pussy out you are providing somewhat of a service for the whole horn dog community the fucking horn dog community appreciates that so at least you actually are providing somewhat of a service. If you're writing sex articles about your fucking sescapades, fuck off. Don't want to hear it. Not interested. Boys questions.

One of the best thing about doing this podcast is I fucking told people to send me articles and I've been getting lots, which kind of rules. Because a lot of times, you know, I'll see people post things or this and that but I don't scour the internet it's kind of like has to come across my attention to see it but when I see a good one I'm always like oh this rules like since the last boys guys I got sent a bunch of them and then a few of them were like really bangers Johnny Rogers sent me me this because you, you know, you guys are in fucking quarantine right now. And the number one thing you got to make sure in quarantine is that you are not toxic. So this is an article from a girl and it says,

how to know that his masculinity is non-toxic. So there's good masculinity and bad masculinity. toxic so there's good masculinity and bad masculinity you know girls are according to this article they're stupid so you don't want to rely on your intuition what you want to rely on is this 19 year old blogger who has nothing to say you want to rely on them telling you what you're looking for in a man how to know that his masculinity is non-toxic What you're looking for in a man? How to know that his masculinity is non-toxic. One, he carries a tote bag that's at once pro-environment, pro-feminism, and pro-reading. A tote bag?

I'll tell you what, I'm looking up what a tote bag is. It's a handbag. A tote bag's a purse? Because I, you know, my original thing was like, I was saying, all right. So I think that what they mean is he carries a purse. But'm like no that's a little on the nose they can't be out of the gate saying that a real guy who's not toxic toxic toxic masculine carries a purse so now you got if you want to be a real man you got a purse when he goes into a sports bar to use a bathroom he buys a glass of wine to be polite that's a bitch know what you need to do you know what a real man does makes up a really

good lie this is what a real man when he wants to go to the washroom if you're a fucking real g this is what you do when you go to the washroom you go to the washroom and you go hey have you seen my i'm meeting my dad here for dinner is he here yet anyone come in okay i'll just you mind if i use the washroom? He should be here anytime. And then you go to the bathroom. You come back out. And you act like, you act for about a minute and a half that you're waiting for your dad.

And you're like, okay, make me wait outside. Maybe take a fake phone call. Dad, hey, how long you been? And as you're taking the phone call, walk outside. And then run. That's what a real man does. A real man lies all the time. And you weasel your way out of things like a fucking

a schemer and a scammer. You don't always do with your friends. Maybe you're not always scheming and scamming with your friends or your loved ones or people that you're working with, but you're scheming and scamming strangers. I'll tell you that much. When you want to use the bathroom, you take it. You don't go there and say, excuse me, sir, I would like to use the bathroom you take it you don't go there and say excuse me sir i would like to use the bathroom i would like to i'll pay seven dollars to use the bathroom like a bitch a real man takes what's his fucking real man walks in lies to them uses the bathroom takes a bite out of the urinal puck and then spits it in the barista's face on the way out that's a real man oh oh oh buys a glass of wine to be polite wine's eleven dollars you're paying

eleven dollars to fucking use a bathroom you're a bitch hey if i was if i i should do a boy's version of jeff fox where is he if you buy an eleven dollar glass of wine when you want to use the bathroom you might be a little bitch so that's when you want to use the bathroom, you might be a little bitch. So that's my new Jeff Foxworthy. You might be a little bitch. He openly cries during Pixar movies. Even the parts that aren't sad. Even the parts that are just beautiful. He even cries

in the credits. He goes, I knew that John Thomas was the gaffer. That was such good gaffing work. Dave Smith was the caterer I bet they had bagels I bet they had bagels Dave Smith was such a good caterer he cries at the animation work he goes oh that sword the detail the detail on that sword that's a real man by the way I a little bit do agree with this because I'm like, the only time that honestly is acceptable to cry for a man, it better be like some fucking movie shit.

I honestly think, if you're a man, it is 10,000 times more acceptable to cry when you're happy than to cry when you're sad. I really, really believe that. when you're happy than to cry when you're sad. I really, really believe that in movies, 90% of the times I've cried, which probably is, I don't even think I have enough to have 90 cause I don't think I've cried too often, but if I've ever like been tearing up in movies, it's way more because something happy than something sad, you know, maybe you have your kid is born. Like that's a time to cry. But like, if you cry, cause like a girl breaks up with you or like you got fired from a job or lost opportunity. Like if you cry from something a girl breaks up with you or like you got fired from a job or lost opportunity. Like if you cry from something bad happened to you, that you might be a little bitch.

To quote myself. Well, then you're out of the boys. If you're crying because sad shit's happening, guess what? You're kicked out of the boys. And never to be returned. Okay. He laughs calmly when called a cuck. He laughs... I'll stop there.

This is what he does. A real man. Laughs loud. He laughs calmly when called a cuck. Not to... When someone comes up to you, you know, when you're holding your purse, when you're holding your purse,

crying in the movies, you're pro reading. Apparently that has something to do with it. You're paying nine dollars so you can use a bathroom because you can't look another man in the eyes because you're such a bitch. And, you know, he's going to steamroll you. You're afraid of confrontation. You're so afraid of confrontation that you want to give him $10 so you could use the bathroom because you can't possibly deal with a scenario where you have to argue your way in because you don't have the fucking skill set that required to be a man.

You got to be fucking, you got to be the man when it comes to arguing and weaseling. It's the number one characteristic of a man. And someone calls you a cuck, they go, you're a fucking cuck. And you go, ha, ha, ha your girlfriend you look at your girlfriend you say just a calm laugh you're a cuck and he laughs loudly when women are funny well that's that's easy because that doesn't happen i love how um this is the funniest part about this article probably in the world you laugh loudly when women are okay he laughed calmly when you're called a cuck and you laugh loudly

when women are funny you don't get to choose how you laugh that's not how it works if it's funny you don't get to if it's actually funny you don't choose how you laugh which just does prove how these guys look at comedy is that not in a nutshell how the type of person that would write an article like this looks at comedy they look they're on they decide what to laugh at someone goes down he goes this man came in and he was so fucking stupid man and he and he probably doesn't even fucking he probably didn't even fight for hillary because he's so stupid and they go they made a decision to laugh loudly. Just a big, hearty laugh.

You've made the decision to laugh loudly because women are funny. And he does not laugh when men are not. Can you imagine a guy that laughs when men are not funny? So what? A woman... I don't know what the scenario is. Maybe you're at work, you're in a workplace setting. And then the woman comes up, she makes like a really funny joke. She's killing it. Funniest girl at work. You know, she's just been smashing always. She's making fun of the boss, you know, she's killing and you're just like,

can't laugh. And then this guy comes over and he looks at you and he was like, hey, it's 10 o'clock. More like beer o'clock. And you go, John, you gotta give her, you gotta give fucking Cindy a comedy lesson because you were the man. What does this have to do with anything? Stop it. He strictly follows traffic laws when he plays Grand Theft Auto. Real men follow traffic laws. No, they don't.

Real men beat the system. You know what I always say is the difference between a fucking real man and a bitch. There's two types of people in this world. There's a person that goes down to the, let's say you're in a restaurant and you go to the basement where the bathrooms are and they're two one person bathrooms. It's not a super big bar. They're both empty. No, no, no. They're not both empty. Sorry. The men's bathroom is, uh, there's someone in there and the woman's bathroom is open and it's a one person stall. There's one type of person that says, well, rules are rules. I can't go in there and sits there and waits like a little cock. And then the second type of person that says well rules are rules i can't go in there and sits there and waits like a little cock and then the second type of person just goes in the women's bathroom and

uses it and says whatever you follow you you should break the law as much as you can get away with it that's what you should do you should be coming to rolling stops at stop signs you should be busting through yellows i I'll bust through fucking yellows and almost turn to reds. And I don't even have a choice. The inertia from my balls being so big. That's what real men, their balls are just so big,

they don't even fucking, they can't even stop for yellows if they wanted. They need to start stopping farther in advance. Because the inertia from their big ass balls bring them through. They need longer time to stop you cuck ass bitches following traffic laws get out of my life his sims world has a matriarchy he does not have a twitter account shut up shut up okay so this is what i wanted to say about this

article because it relates to another year ago so it's such a perfect example of what happened in the last little while and that girls sort of had the chance for a while to to kind of be in charge where the media and everyone said women you're in charge we're going to listen to what you say and not what everyone else says. It was like, you guys are in charge. You're the, you're the bosses right now, you know? And then what they did was they're like, okay, well, here are the rules. Men should have purses. They can't laugh when guys are funny. They fucking, every real men follow traffic laws. They should be crying all the time. And everyone's like, what are you talking about? Like they just tried to redesign such a fake reality that everyone's like all right this

experiment's over we listen it was kind of like remember when they said they were like men were in power you know that was kind of a big thing of like well men were in power for fucking ever and look where it got us it's like we give women a try and it was like yeah we did that experiment's over there was a pretty good two years it was like all right women you're fucking in charge now all right women what's gonna happen they're like okay here we go first things first every fucking actor is transgendered there's no such thing as a women we are gonna design every movie and workplace by race and gender also everyone's sexist and but there's also nuts this thing is sex. And then also, it was just like, whoa, whoa.

Hold the phones. This experiment is over. It's like your girlfriend's like, why do you always drive? I want to drive. And you're like, yeah, I thought you'd never ask. I actually hate driving, So we get on the wheel and then she crashes like 17 times in the first two weeks. And you're like, all right, maybe I'll pop myself back in this driver's seat. Let's get back to, why don't we, why don't we get back to our original

roles? I'll do the driving. You do the nagging. Danny pull us, Chuck. This has been broadened up so many times, but go check Danny's Instagram. He has a fucking clip, Danny Jokes, where in certain countries they had a thing that says, they issued a public health warning that says, it's a hard time for everyone, so girls, if you could try not to nag your husband. That's so fucking funny.

But anyways, my point is that this is how girls overplayed their hand. And listen, this isn't all girls. I have a lot of fucking chick. I'm going to hang out with a chick right now that kind of rules. And it's like, it's not every girl's like this, but it was women as a unit got together, got in charge and overplayed their hands so fucking bad that everyone's, you ruined it for all the women. And the problem is, you know, women didn't keep the other women in check. You let the fucking crazy Alyssa Milanas of the world be in charge. And you,

the sane women took a back seat and let it happen. And you let them say, they said, believe all women. And you're like, oh, whatever, you know, and you, but no, no, no. Well, too bad. all women and you're like, oh, whatever, you know, and you're like, no, no, no. Well, too bad. No, it's over. This is over. Wrap it up. My point is that a lot of these problems that you say men have with toxic masculinity are caused by women. So this is an article that says how to fight toxic masculinity. And I'm proposing the hypothesis that every one of the things that they say are toxic masculinity, women caused. So this is the biggest sleight of hand in the history of the world. This is what the government does. They go, look at all these, we need to have a bigger government. And then they go, look at all these

problems. We need more government. And you're like, that was, you caused the problems. So they're causing the problems and then trying to be the solution. They're like, this is the issue. And you're like, that is the issue because of you. Okay. How to fight toxic masculinity. Bear with me because I feel like this premise is a little complicated for me to say in one sentence, but I honestly think it's true. They cause the problems and then they want

to be the ones that fix them. So number one, this is the problems with toxic masculinity. And this is what toxic masculinity does to men. It goes, toxic masculinity makes men suffer pain and silence. Okay. This is one of your things that men, men suffer pain and silence because of their toxic masculinity. And we need to stop this. Okay. Men suffer pain and silence, especially in the last five years, because you've made of men afraid of saying anything. Men have been so afraid to say their actual opinions on anything for fear of losing their jobs. You basically said, okay, you can't say that you have to have the right political opinions or you're fired.

You can't say anything about these five topics. And if men are, you know, if you have any cognitive dissonance about it too bad these are your opinions so of course you have to suffer in silence if you go to the internet and you're like i fucking feel pissed off because i feel that women are doing this and they say you're wrong and you're part of the problem and now you're fired well so are they only supposed to suffer in silence if you disagree with the problems that they're having? What if some of the problems are that they feel like they're getting a bad shake at work because of all of the affirmative action and social justice that's been shoved in their face? What if those are their problems?

Do they have to suffer in silence about those? Do they have to suffer in silence about those? You only don't want them to suffer in silence if their problems are that they can't show their emotions, which you think is the problem, but it's not. A lot of the times the problems for a lot of men was they feel like they got out of school and they used to have this path to get jobs and now they feel useless. And a lot of that was because of your war on men. Men are suffering in silence because of all of the things that are affecting their lives, whether that be, you know, doing worse in school than they doing worse after university than they've traditionally always done, not feeling

like they've made enough money, not feeling like they have enough purpose in society, having trouble finding like a relationship they like in this new scenario where everyone has to fuck each other that you created. So all of these problems that you created, now you go and you say, you're so toxic, you're suffering in silence. Can you imagine if they stopped suffering in silence and they said, okay, well, my problem is that I was actually the top of my class. And then they gave this scholarship to someone else with worse marks because they wanted more women. Whoa, whoa, whoa, you were canceled. So a lot of the problems that they're suffering in silence for is because you've made a push to silence men at an insane rate, at a very high rate.

Number two, toxic masculinity tells men to have no needs. Again, men have needs. You just want them to have different needs. And girls are like, no, those aren't your needs. No, that's kind of not your needs. Your needs are, you need to cry more. Your needs are, you need to express yourself emotionally. Your needs are, you know, you don't know what our needs are. That's the problem. So you're like, men have no needs because of toxic masculinity. Men have no needs because you refuse to acknowledge what their actual needs are. And you keep trying to replace them with fake needs that you think they have. Toxic masculinity has taught men that they should never lose. First of all, getting women has taught men that they shouldn't lose.

That's how you get women. That's how, traditionally, men have done really good to get the most pussy, which you'd still be getting in coronavirus. Being the best hunter so they could get the best snatch huh and now you're saying that no it's actually toxic masculinity that's telling you you should never lose no it's the fucking hierarchy of how the world works and you should be taught that that's that it's good to win they're not you're not taught you should never lose but you should be taught that it's good to win.

That's what your girls are saying. Toxic masculinity teaches men that winning is important. It is important. A, it is your fault that they think that for the most part. But even given that, so what? Winning is important. And you should be taught that winning is important. If you're not being competitive and you're not winning, then you're not learning and you're not getting better.

And men need to feel like they're moving forward. That's one of their needs, which you will not acknowledge. Toxic masculinity teaches men to show no emotions other than bravado or rage. Those are actual emotions that men feel. This is probably the number one for me in my point that I'm making here. Because girls are saying this. Toxic masculinity tells you that you should never show emotion

other than bravado or rage. This is the difference between a girl and a guy. If you know a guy that's having trouble, that's can't control himself. It actually is like, you know, like the girl that can't stop crying. You know, she's always breaking down, which by the way, I've seen a million people in, in this fucking quarantine writing on their writing on their Facebook, be like, woke up and cried again today. It's like, stop posting that you cried. It's disgusting. But the girl that just can't stop crying is the guy that's like punching walls

and stuff. So the problem is that is a real emotion. It's not, this isn't society told these guys to be like that. I know a million people and they're actually like that. That's why, you know, a lot of times society tells guys to play sports they need to try to funnel all this energy into other things that's why you people chase girls all of the stuff that helps you get rid of all these fucking every guy's been there where it's like you've actually had this like rage come over you like fucking feeling like punching a wall and you're like that is a part of being a guy that sucks but that's not a manufactured thing by toxic masculinity that is real so when you go to women and you're like, that is a part of being a guy that sucks, but that's not a manufactured thing by toxic masculinity. That is real. So when you go to women and you're like,

I have this thing and I try to, I need to, I need, you know, you need fucking ways to vessel it. And they're like, no, you actually don't have that thing. Society told you you have that thing. So the problem is you, once again, you're like, oh, society tells you that you're supposed to have bravado and rage. No, they actually do have it. Guys actually do have that. The same way that you're always crying. Guys actually do have that emotion. And there's a lot, they do need to figure out a way to neutralize it. But I'll tell you what doesn't neutralizing it, pretending it doesn't exist. Pretending it's a figment of men's imagination that they're more aggressive than you. And then it says, to paraphrase the comedian Bill Burr,

the man box means you can't admit a baby is cute, hug a puppy, say you want a cookie, order banana pancakes, or carry an umbrella in the rain. I love that they quoted Bill Burr because it just shows exactly what these kind of people do. So Bill Burr, who is obviously like a pretty masculine guy, he's been pretty vocal against a lot of, you know, anti-men stuff. And they, and Bill Burr showed a moment of vulnerability in one of his specials where he says, you know, fuck, like sometimes I wish I kind of wasn't like this. You know, he's showing a moment of vulnerability in a special that was otherwise pretty masculine. And he shows this one moment and then they pick that one moment and use it as example for why men are too toxic. It's like, it's like, you know,

your girlfriend that's like, you always, you know, you need to be, you need to be a fucking more emotional. You need to be more emotional. And you're like, and then one time when you were like with your girlfriend and you're drinking and you say, you're like, fuck, maybe once, you know, sometimes I feel like maybe I, maybe I feel like I am sometimes just acting a little too tough when I'm not. And then for the rest of your life, she goes, remember even that time you said that you were acting too tough. And you're like, this is why I could never be vulnerable about you. Pilbara says there's one sentence and you take it, you twist it up and you use against him in an article that probably goes against him and what he thinks. So this is exactly what you do. Another, okay. So another boy's article that got sent in,

which is everyone's always, always there's, there's a lot of these articles that come out, but it goes, it's about, and I don't want to go through it because my point is that we need to dismiss shit like this, but it was one of those ones, this woman's in love with a plane and she goes, I'm so in love with a plane that I got a replica of the plane and I sleep with it and I get so horny with the plane. And it's like, okay, it's a mentally ill person it's either a mentally ill person or someone that's trying to get attention it's not really fair to like find the craziest person in the universe and be like look this is what these people support although it is funny that people were like oh if they gave they okay oh what they legalized gay marriage what next people

are going to want to marry a chair and then it was like three years later people there's like 20 articles about people like i'm married to my chair and you're like fuck it really did happen quick the funny part is that these people have to celebrate it it's kind of like trans stuff where it's like you know i'm sure there's plenty of people that are trans they're normal but if you go on the new york subway you see lots of dudes with like a chick's wig on and wearing a halter top, yelling and screaming and they're covering their own shit. And liberal whatever fucking chicks in New York still have to be like, that is so brave. The funny part is that they've boxed themselves into such a corner that they have to pretend they even like this nonsense. I mean, that's the funny part about this kind of article. But, you know, there was this other girl that says she's the funny part about this kind of article. But,

you know, there was this other girl that says she's in love with an Eiffel Tower. And I've met a few girls that are in love with an Eiffel Tower, if you know what I mean. High five, fucking her. But to me, this is the funniest and grossest part about woke stuff. It's like the grossest part about all the fucking woke nonsense is that on both sides, it kind of legitimized really shitty things. So on the fucking that's other side, it legitimized people that fucking a mentally ill person or a person that I'm in love with a fork. This is my girlfriend.

It's a fork. And then on the other side, social justice, one of the, one of the biggest grossest effects of the whole fucking woke era is that it made a lot of like super fucking hack old comedians relevant again. Like there was all these fucking old comedians that were like, Hey, uh, what do you call a fucking slandy eyed chink? And you're like, Jesus Christ, dude, what the fuck you call? What do you, what is this? You know? And they were just old and out of touch. And then now these people kind of be like, yeah, we're free speech guys. Guys like us that don't accept shit. And they'll come up to people like me and they'll be like, guys like us,

we don't care about that. And I'm like, I don't really think we're doing the same thing. If I'm doing a joke in the punchline is that black people kind of steal a little bit though. You know, let's say that was my thing. I was like, I mean, just if you were an Asian guy running a store, I mean, who's stealing more or whatever? Whoever the fuck I was point I was making. And everyone was like, yeah, someone said it. To me, that would be disgusting, you know? So that's the same way where all these ridiculous, gross people now get to go and be like, these people are in

love with a fucking plane. You've seen these people. They're fucking planes. Yeah. I'm a free speech warrior. They get to be free speech guys when they actually work on an old and out of touch. So that to me, to me was the grossest part that it took a bunch of like old hacks off the shelf and rejuvenated them to now they're like free speech guys like these guys in their 50s that aren't that good at comedy and they're like legit just doing fucking crappy fucking racist jokes or fucking old ball and she's a fucking slut and because you know women have overplayed their hands so much you're kind of like yeah i guess i mean i'm happy watching someone stick it to women.

So that's one of the biggest, grossest things of that. It legitimizes people that are in fucking love with a plane, and it makes a bunch of old, gross hacks relevant again. You know what? One of the things that, you know, it's kind of those things where they're both, both those sides are fucking morons. It's kind of like when people say,

comedy is about punching up, not punching down. And the other side is like, comedy is just aboutons. It's kind of like when people say comedy is about punching up, not punching down. And the other side is like, comedy is just about comedy. It's irrelevant. And you're like, you're both wrong. Because obviously the power dynamic matters in comedy. Everyone can see a scenario. Everyone can think of a scenario where it's funny. You know, if you see a kid and he's kind of making fun of his dad at the family gathering, that's a lot funnier than the dad roasting his fucking four-year-old being like this fucking loser you everyone can see why making fun

of a teacher is kind of funny because they're the teacher but they think the power dynamics are like white people and black people and it might be in this scenario but if i'm in a if i'm in a gay pride rally and then everyone in the crowd's gay and then i go on stage and start talking trash about gay people the power dynamic was punching up because in that scenario they're the power dynamic of course comedy the dynamic matters but people on this other side the fucking woke side think that it's set and that's why they're morons it's not set the dynamic changes in every room in every scenario in every social setting. There's a different dynamic and the thing that matters more. If you're at a Black Panther meeting

or at a KKK meeting, you think the same thing's going to be the same funniness based on who the targets are? So no, comedy does need a target. And you know, bullying people's often funny too. But in this scenario, if you're bullying someone, a lot of times the target is the fact that you're not supposed to talk about that. So the target is the social norm. A lot of times the target can be the institution that wants to act a certain way. You know, a lot of times when you're making a really fucking aggressive joke, the target is the fact that you're not supposed to do it. So there's a million different ways that you can be punching all different sorts of ways. And the dynamic does matter. And there needs to be a target that people in the audience feel is deserving or else they're not going to laugh.

So that is kind of true to some degree, but everyone like gets it wrong. And the other side's like, no, funny is funny. Well, that's not really true to me if i'm making a joke you know at a kkk meeting about black people that's not funny anymore it's gross to me there is like an objective better or worse so maybe they're laughing but it's still fucking worse and it's crappy and that's what preaching to the choir is and that's when they're there in a different faith because that's not natural they're laughing the way that woke people laugh when you go white people are the worst they go like the way that article said, you're supposed to laugh extra loud when a woman's funny. That's what, that's what they're doing. If you go to

fucking a bunch of racist people and you're like fucking black people, the worst, this guy said it, everyone's just fake laughing. That's not real. That's not what actual comedy is. You know, when you look at Tim, Eric, you're like Tim and Eric, you're like, what's their target? What are they punching up at? They're making fun of the structure of, like, television. They're making fun of the institutions of how people look at art. You know, Tom Green was making fun of what late-night talk shows are. So a lot of times it's not so simple.

A lot of times you're doing five things at once. And that's why when people say, this guy's preaching to the choir, they sort of say, this guy's preaching to the choir, and they of say, this guy's preaching to the choir and they're implying that he shouldn't be preaching to the choir. Right. That's sort of the idea. They say, this guy's preaching to the choir, which means he's talking to his own base. And they say that like, it's a bad thing. Right. They say, it's kind of like if a, you know, if a liberal person that really loved, you know, hated Trump goes up and he goes, Trump's the worst. And he's preaching the choir that Trump's bad. Or you go, the Trump's amazing. And you're talking about

great Trump is, and you're like, they're preaching the choir and people use this as a negative. But the problem is you're all missing the point. When you say you're preaching the choir, like it's bad. What you're implying is that you should be saying those points to people who don't think that because you should be converting people. But that takes the stance that comedy and art should be propaganda, which is what they think. So they think, no, no, no. If you hate Trump, you shouldn't be just only talking to people that hate Trump. You need to be going out there and converting people that don't hate Trump. No, no, you don't need to be converting anybody. You don't need to turn your comedy into propaganda. No, no, you don't need to be converting anybody. You don't need to turn your comedy into propaganda.

You're not part of a movement. If you're an artist that now bows down to a movement and you're, you're concerned about converting people, you're now a disciple. You're a propaganda working for a movement. You're not a, you're not an artist anymore. So what you should be doing is you should be speaking to the choir, but you shouldn't be preaching. So when they say preaching the choir, what they think is that you should be converting people. That's what the problem with preaching the choir is. The truth is you should be talking to the choir, people that like you.

You shouldn't be talking to people that don't agree with you and don't like you. You should, or just whatever, a mixed sample, but you just shouldn't be preaching because you're not a preacher. When you go to a church, a preacher's there to sell you the word of something. They're selling something to you. An artist shouldn't be selling something to you. An artist should be making something that's good and it shouldn't be propaganda for a movement.

So you should be talking to the choir, should be the opposite of preaching to the choir. The opposite of preaching to the choir is preaching to the people who disagree with you. You should be saying what you have to say, and if they don't like it, they can suck a dick. And you shouldn't care if they join your movement, because if you do, then you're no longer an artist. You're a politician or whatever the fuck. Anyways, I don't know if people like it when I get in too long a rants about comedy, but I try not to, I try not to spend at least any more than like five to 10 minutes an episode talking about

comedy and stuff. But I think some of my best starting sites come from art and you can use them for a lot of different things. Maybe, or maybe not. Maybe I fucking start talking about comedy and everyone's like, shut the fuck up. There's 75 podcasts about comedy. And now that quarantine started, there's actually 85,000 podcasts about quarantine. I just watched a couple podcasts where they dissect Amy Schumer's jokes one after another, and they fucking love them. One last joke that I meant to mention that I'm just going to say before I go. And by the way, before I say this, if you can, whenever I've asked people to do this they have

done it and it's really really helped when you if you take a screenshot of the podcast you're listening to whether whatever app you're listening to and then post it on Instagram or Twitter and tag me in it honest to god that's really helped and my numbers have going up I can now I can get some big guests if I want to get big guests, I can get sponsors. The numbers do matter. Back to the article where girls are always talking about, because I found this really funny article. I'm going to read it next week about how girls are talking about how guys, the reason guys aren't good at sex is because they don't teach it in school

and they need to teach pleasuring a woman's clitoris, which is so funny because I did that joke. On my last video that was on my youtube uh youtube.com slash ryan long comedy the coronavirus special and i said do you think it's racist that they're not teaching butt sex in school or whatever the fuck i said and it was like this girl actually says in the article she goes that someone sent me she goes um they need to teach fucking sucking the clitoris more. And they need to teach out of pleasure. The clitoris, like that's what they need in grade four. They

need to be like, all right guys, like everyone's going to hand out all your clitorises. Like, and then what do they do with dicks too? Like every girl gets a dildo, they're turning it into a blowjob class. Every guy gets a clam and you have to eat it out. And the teacher, can you imagine the teacher? Like, by the way, teachers that teach sex ed, you're already like like jesus christ i don't want to fucking teach sex ed and then they're like also you have to teach the kids how to give blow jobs you're like fuck me i quit how about that i quit because fuck that but i was thinking like okay ladies girls are like most guys can't make girls come it's like yeah because it's really hard to make girls come almost as if it wasn't meant to be your defective vaginas that can't come how funny is it that girls

look at it's like it's really hard for girls to come and guys come really easy and they're like that's because we're just better at making people come not our bodies have trouble coming okay this is what having sex with the girls like ladies have you ever had sex with a girl a guy we're just better at making people cum. Not our bodies have trouble cumming. Okay, this is what having sex with a girl is like, ladies. Have you ever had sex with a guy that's really, really drunk and he can't cum? And after 40 minutes, you're like, oh, can we just wrap this up? That's you every single time.

That's having sex with you every time. So you gotta meet us halfway, ladies. Either half of the time you don't come and it's one for me, one for you, or figure out the techniques to make yourself come at a reasonable pace without fucking whips and chains, okay?

That's my final thought. Jerry Springer style, Ryan's final thought. The Sassy Boys cast, Corona Edition. I guess this isn't the Corona edition. This is kind of just a normal boys cast. All right. Can't decide whether I'm going to have a guest next week or I'm going to do it by myself. Kind of like doing them both. I got pretty good feedback on the Patrick episode. All right. We're going to make some decisions over here at the boys cast.

I've been Ryan Long. Please keep telling your friends about the cast please keep screenshotting and posting honestly the movement's been building and then you get to be the cool guy that's like yo I was there first fucking dude I already said this but

this fucking dude moved here from Canada I found him I was one of the first Americans to get on this dude and then now everyone's, then you're fucking dorky as normie friends. They'll be like, if you heard of Ryan Long and you go, oh yeah, he was cool six months ago. All right. Thank you very much. This is the boys cast piece.