The Boyscast with Ryan Long - Women Entrepreneurs Hit Harder During Pandemic
Episode Date: February 26, 2021Japanese Prime Minister says women can't speak while Western Countries Blame Women Entrepreneurs problems on men. Also I weight in on D'elia and a few other things. patreon.com/theboyscast Learn more ...about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
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And you can tell our friends, and they can have my things when we're dead.
But we are in forever.
But we are in forever.
And you can tell our friends.
And we are back with another episode of The Boys Cast.
First podcast exclusively for the boys.
We've been on tour.
The dogs have been out here.
After one of the shows, a girl came with up to me and she was with
her boyfriend she goes yeah uh the your podcast is only allowed boys like am i allowed to listen
to it and naturally i had to call my security which had her removed from the premises which
is unfortunate because she bought a ticket and i'm sorry but you should know better even to ask
that question first podcast exclusively for the boys and pretty interesting we've been
having uh so i've been hitting the road on tour and i've been doing tons of shows around here too
and a lot of the stuff i've been doing on the podcast i've been trying to translate to bits
and i've had some some dingers some things that have been uh translating one of the articles i'm
going to talk about right off the bat,
which is a Girl Guy article that sort of relates to my That's Their Culture sketch
which came out this week.
But it's funny because I've been sort of saying that the idea that, you know,
I even said, I said, listen, I think probably men are just better at math,
but girls on average are smarter.
And I said, if girls, if you're listening, an average is when you add up the amount of
people divided by the amount, add up the stuff and divided by amount of people.
But the truth is, the difference is both parties have their ways of explaining they're dumb
and girls just use their dumbness to get stuff.
So people think they're dumb and girls just use their dumbness to get stuff so people think they're dumber guys
will say that oh i'm just street smart which means that guy is a moron and girls will be like oh i'm
emotionally intelligent which means the girl is a basket of problems but girls use their like
stupidity more and i do the same thing so a lot of girls will be like you know have a fancy purse and and
they're like I'm so stupid can you fix this for me I don't know how to do anything if you could
just buy me stuff and then they're kind of behind closed doors of their friends like this idiot just
bought me another Gucci bag and I said I do the exact same thing with you know girls be like hey
can you uh make dinner for me and I'm like what, what's a spoon? I'm sitting there. Would you like ketchup on your lettuce sandwich? That's the gist of how I do it. But the difference is men, I feel like
can be lied to less. So girls will, well, there's an article that I was watching and it was like
real men don't beat their wives. And that was the gist of it. They're, you know, real men, if you're real.
But then the problem is, what they do is they, the people that, you know, they're like, oh,
you want to be like this, not a real man?
And it's like Mike Tyson, Charlie Sheen, all these, you know, some war machine from UFC.
And they show you all this stuff.
And they're like, what are you going to be not a real man?
And then they would go, no, this is a real man. And they show Beto O'Rourke or a
guy who looks like me. And you go, well, the actual scenario is those guys are badass. I have eyes,
but oftentimes badass dudes get carried away and they need to control that problem.
And that's what's actual scenario is. And so you need to spin it to us.
You can't be like, actually, Beto O'Rourke, that's a man.
You have to be like, yeah, no, when you're entering the badass guy territory,
a lot of these people have problems, you know, that they need to control.
And that's more of what the truth is.
Whereas girls, you can lie to them a little.
You know, they'll accept lies. Like, they'll be like, oh, this girl's so hot. Look at that. And they'll, yeah, she's
beautiful. Whereas guys, you go, Oh, this guy, 500 pounds. No one's going to be like commenting
on that. You're a King. But with girls like, Oh, this is, you're a beautiful queen when she's not.
And this, you know, cause girls will believe stuff more. They'll believe things like this
girl's hot when she's not, or that he's not going to hit me again.
That's the gist of the difference.
But I did this video this week
and I said, that's their culture.
And that kind of came from an old joke
where I was doing about Japan.
And a lot of,
I used to talk about this on stage,
but a lot of girls will be like,
someone will say,
oh, I don't want my daughter to date a black guy or like hypothetically and someone be like you know
and then japanese or actually was more about immigrants where they go oh i don't uh think
we should have you know immigration as much here and people like you're a nazi in japan's like we
haven't had an immigrant in 10 000 years and their population's declining so they have people that
are in their 60s
and they're trying to retire as the job is a garbage man.
And people are like, oh, we don't have a new,
you know, enough new workforce to come in.
And the guy's like, well, I want to retire.
And they're like, I guess we could bring in some Muslim immigrants.
And the guy's like, no, no, no, no, no.
I dig, I dig, I dig.
Because he's a ditch digger.
I've been code switching what the job is.
But that was kind of where the joke came
from. And I did that. That's their culture and all the different things where it's like, oh,
it's obviously fine if it's a different thing because it's, you know, that's their culture.
But I thought it was, I found articles that was such a perfect example of that. And a lot of
people, when I made the video, posted a lot more examples being like, you know, you should message
how, you know, in China they have the concentration camps basically for the Uyghurs, which I believe that's what they're called.
But I thought, found two articles, which is just the funniest way that like we treat other cultures here than we treat our culture.
So I found this article and it says, which is hilarious.
And if you guys have been keeping up,
the Japan Prime Minister based,
he says the most crazy shit.
He says, Japan,
women are allowed to attend the ruling party's meetings as long as they keep quiet.
And this is an article by Sky News.
And basically they took the boys cast approach
where they are allowed to be there.
Their electrocution software works a little differently.
But if you're in the meetings and they speak, then if there's an audible thing, it's the electrocution software is attached to decibels.
If there's decibels coming out of their mouth, then they will be receiving the Japanese style electrocution software.
The Liberal Democratic Party proposed proposals will allow five female lawmakers to join the party's all-male board meetings as observers.
So they weren't allowed to be in the meetings at all now.
Which, basically, I don't know if you know this, what's been going on in the Japan meetings.
But before that, it was just a bunch of Japanese dudes just crushing sake.
Just talking about cheating on their wives.
Just boy shit.
The Japanese leading party meetings were straight up.
They're playing flip cop, talking about all the Asian chicks they're smashing,
just having a blast.
And they were like, you know, girls have got to come.
You got to bring your younger brother, basically.
We got to let some chicks in the room.
Fine, but zip it up.
The Liberal Democratic Party proposed they would allow the female members to look and then they submit any opinions they have afterwards.
Which, just in general, this is maybe one of the funniest articles.
Because the gist of it is the Japanese, they released this like pretty nice of us, right?
They said, you know know what we've taken your
considerations we're gonna do this you can submit your opinions after to a file which we will call
the recycling bin essentially which that was an old thing that the the booker ryan at yuck yucks
used to say to the customers he said the comedy club said, you can submit your complaints and I will put it in our filing cabinet, a.k.a. the recycling bin, which I always thought was super funny.
But they said it follows the resignation of the Tokyo Olympics organizing committee chief after he said he saw this guy resigned after he said during an online meeting that women talk too much.
I mean, this article just in general is super objectively funny.
But he said women talk too much.
The 82-year-old said it is important to fully understand what kind of discussions are happening and take a look what it's all about.
Because he thought when he was doing this meeting that they were asking him the other way.
Like, why did he do it?
He thought he was doing this press and they're like, so when you did this, you know, what was your reasoning?
He goes, I know.
I know what you're thinking.
They're going to yap too much.
Listen, I'm just trying to listen to this discussion.
You might understand, you know, you want to listen to the discussions that are happening.
And I thought that I would just take a step forward.
And they're like, no, no, no. We're asking why you wouldn't let them talk. And he goes, what? I mean, that are happening. And I thought that I would just take a step forward. And they're like, no, no, no.
We're asking why you wouldn't let them talk.
And he goes, what?
I mean, that's obvious.
You can't let them talk.
Yep, yep, yep.
But he said, requiring female observers to remain.
Oh, this is the article says,
but requiring female observers at meetings to remain quiet
has drawn fierce criticisms that the party is out of touch this is yeah because
this was like him saying you're welcome yeah then they're like uh also they want to talk he's like
you give these people an inch they take a mile i'm trying here the former japanese
prime minister had initially refused to resign.
Also, whenever you, that's always funny.
I was having this conversation with someone and I'm like, yeah, and the person resigned from their job because of it.
And you're like, no, they didn't resign.
They were given the option to resign.
Whenever someone resigns, it means they were fired, but they go, listen, we're firing you.
But if you want, you can resign to like save face. And they say, when asked whether he truly believed if women talk too much, he replied, I don't listen to women that much lately. So I don't really know.
You imagine in a trillion years, anyone here doing that?
They said, Do you believe that that women talk too much? He goes, Honestly, I'm not the guy to
ask because I don't have women in my circle
because they're not allowed to be there.
So if you are able to find a politician
that lets women, you know, yap in their ear,
that would be a good person to ask.
I've not been in the scenario where I would even know.
And then, so I'm not going to go too crazy
into that article.
You're just like pretty funny.
But the funniest part is so now the opposite this is the kind of article in japan
we're thinking that the women should be allowed to talk at meetings in canada this is uh what
they wrote studies shows women-owned businesses are hit harder by the pandemic
and they're gonna go into. But out of the gates,
you're always,
like you read these articles
and you go,
but they own the business.
Women-owned businesses
are hit harder than the pandemic,
but okay.
Women entrepreneurs,
the whole gist is like
women entrepreneurs,
it's worse for them in the pandemic,
but you're,
so if they're at someone else's company, then it's their fault.
But if it's their company, how is that anyone else's fault?
And again, this is one of those things where you go, yeah, if if the women's businesses are set up, that they're the ones that are getting hit worse.
All the more reason that they should be against lockdowns.
This should be called.
You can always you can always watch these articles
and you start out,
and it's kind of like you want to be sympathetic
because, you know, someone's like,
you know, our businesses are all getting crushed
and you're like, oh, that sucks.
But the problem is,
you know that their conclusion
is that it's my fault.
And you go, yeah. It's like you're you know your
girl coming home and be like I got fired from my job and you're like oh my you know that's so crappy
like you know do you want to you know let's go talk about it or whatever and then you're trying
to be sympathetic like do you need anything and then she's like oh uh the reason I got fired is
because you didn't support me enough and you go I am out out of listening to this. I'm not going to take credit
for this. I mean, yeah, it sucks. But as soon as as soon as it starts, you start pointing blame
all around to people that don't deserve it. You go not listen anymore. And this is the case that
they're building. Amanda Monday's business had just become profitable and hired its ninth staffer
in the pandemic hit overnight revenues at her
drop-in co-working and child care space in toronto's east end fell to zero and you're already
like yeah daycare business would be doing bad and danny danny uh my buddy danny he said that uh
yeah i used to have a little joke where he said yeah one of the reasons that the men's businesses
do better is because men start landscaping companies and women start cupcake stores.
But anyway, yeah, that's why you want to diversify, diversify, diversify.
But whose fault is it that people pick different businesses?
And it's not, there's nothing wrong with that.
You go, yeah, women probably are more likely to start a child care business or a cupcake store or a a yacht factory, for example, a wine, a winery where you just go there and pay for them to wine.
it's kind of like everything where the the gist is that everything should be redesigned because you it's sort of the same way it happens in like comedy and stuff like that where it's like
there's there's not really a perfect system for how to get popular so they're like we need a system
and then once you you know start a system someone starts something else like podcasting and they're
like okay well we need a system for that so then then we can rig it. It's all like, so women started their own
businesses. They choose the things and there's nothing wrong with that. If you want to choose
something that's less profitable, obviously the same as when you go to university, certain careers,
if you want to take the classic gender studies, it's going to make less money than if you,
you know, want to be an engineer. But then afterwards, you're like, this is unfair that, you know, our business is doing
worse. And you're like, yeah, I mean, that's what happens when you started when you started
a volatile business as opposed to a landscaping company. A study by Freshbook said women owned
businesses across all industries are taking nearly twice as long to recover from the financial setbacks brought on by COVID-19 compared with businesses owned by men.
Even industries that are normally women-dominated are now seeing male-owned businesses recovering significantly faster.
If you make a slight tweak to these articles, they read like, men rule.
All of these articles, you can always switch them to congratulations, men.
Even in industries, even in the flower industry, even in the whining industry, the grind and whining industry, men have been doing better than women.
Men have done a great job to rebound.
Congratulations, men. You'd think at
some point there'd be some type of a congratulations. Really good work. Staying afloat during the
pandemic, even in the tough times, even in industries where women have a stronghold.
Good work, boys. There should be woofs at the end of this article. There's no question my business is
suffering, she said. I'm torn between caring for my children and running a business. And there is
no world in which I'm giving my business full attention. My focus will always be split between
children and work. Yeah, I mean, that is the fundamental difference between a certain type of man that is, you know, a fucking shark that starts businesses and your average person and probably woman.
There's a lot of people out there and that are more predominantly man that definitely, 1,000% would give the business full attention and not do that much paying attention to their kids.
I think they made 9,000 90s Christmas movies about that.
The kid comes home.
Dad, can we play catch for 15 seconds?
And the dad goes, ugh.
Do you know how much paperwork I have to do?
Play catch with yourself.
And the kid goes, no, I'm kidding, Dad.
And then at the end of it, the dad quits his job, comes home, plays catch with the son, and they live happily ever after.
But they never really show three years after where the family's like living in a shack and they're broke now.
And the dad's like, all jokes aside, like, that was a fun night, but now I don't have a job.
and everyone here seems to have pretty expensive tastes,
including the missus who wanted me to choose both family time and the job.
It's all about how much sacrifices are you willing to make.
And the problem is, it's not that they don't,
and it's not that certain people don't,
because you're more than welcome
to live whatever life you want.
And you go, yeah, I'm going to focus on my family.
Like, I'm not going to work a fucking trillion hours a day.
For what?
For what?
How many people have that attitude?
For what?
You know, I'll work the easiest job I can, make money, and then go skiing with my family and hang out, do whatever.
But they go, well, no, they should also make the same amount of money.
Their businesses should be doing as good.
They should be as successful as a comedian.
You go, yeah, I mean, it's going to be difficult.
If you want to spend, be like the perfect mother, spend a ton of time with your kids,
you're like, yeah, that's difficult.
Yeah.
But you want to make all those sacrifices with anything, whether it's going out for dinner with your kids you're like yeah that's difficult so yeah but you want to make all those sacrifices with anything whether it's going out for dinner with your friends that's why i always
i have this conversation with women so much i go you know yeah you're gonna have to do a little
less of that stuff and i'm like i gotta i gotta see my mom twice a week i gotta hang out with my
friends you know social time is very important you go okay but don't complain then don't be like why is my bit things not doing
as good you're like yeah right now i'm exhausted i go i go from one thing to another i'm freaking
i'm on tour i come back i do this podcast i'm doing these videos then i'm doing this bunch
of videos we're doing the thing for this movie i'm like yeah this is probably not how to live
but i'm gonna keep doing it because for some reason, the most important thing is to win or something.
You go, I think a lot of girls would go, why?
What would you do?
Why would you ever do that?
Cut out 30% of it.
You'll be fine.
I go, no, I don't want to.
I'm going to do it this way.
And then, but they go, no, you should, you should do it this way.
Or we should be compensated for like, you should do it this way or we should be compensated. Like you want personality compensation.
They essentially want to be, they want personality subsidization.
Leisure subsidies.
It's like, well, I'm at a disadvantage because I enjoy my leisure time more.
I'd like to be paid.
I think that the job should be paying me more
and the government should be subsidizing my business.
And you go, what?
I have a disability where I really should be subsidizing my business. And you go, what?
I have a disability where I really like hanging out with my family.
And you go, maybe it shouldn't be glorified to do the other thing,
but you don't get both.
Yeah, it sucks.
That's the way you can't, that's the only you get one life and you only have 24 hours a day.
Choose to spend them on your cupcake shop
or you choose to spend them, you cupcake shop or you choose to spend them you know making
cupcakes for your family and they're also saying it's because of kids which is always kind of like
a funny argument because you go you know i know the end of this article and you know all the in
between parts the the the gist of it is that it's because of sexism but it's like what are you actually
proposing that you know i understand when you look at companies and government employees you know you
can make the argument you go okay women have kids more and you know they take care of them more
so we should have more maternity leave and then you go and then you petition for the boss but you
go but it's her own business this is like you also, you know, you don't get to like call mom and dad.
When you started the thing, you go, yeah, maybe don't start a business and then find
a place where, or it's like, if you really want to be the person, you're like, I'm going
to frigging take over the world of a business.
And you have like four kids and you're taking care of them.
It's like, yeah, you're going to have to be like, you know what?
Maybe I got to have a nanny.
Maybe I have to call Fran dresser. And now I have an extra 30 grand in
my system. If that's how I want to do it. Or when you go, what can we do about this? You go,
you're so frigging right. You guys hit the nail on the head. It's so much harder to be a women
entrepreneur with kids. So what we're going to do is change the divorce courts so the men get custody at least 50% of the time. We're going to do you such a solid. You guys are so right that
you have to take that burden. So all those divorce courts where like the girl sort of gets it every
time. There's so many factors. There's a million factors that go into this, but you go, it's just
so funny to me picking entrepreneurs where no one it's no one's
fault you started a business it's nobody is involved in this and then to find someone to blame
because it's doing worse you go this industry is worse because of sexism and you go
I'll tell you who would have a different spin on this the prime minister of
japan i'd like to hear what the prime minister of japan's take on why the women businesses are
doing worse it sort of is if i was if i was just your average girl which i think is already
happening that people are it's already happening that i'm becoming your average girl it's already
happening that like chicks are getting fed up with this shit but you're like then 99 you're like stop yelling at everyone and making everyone annoyed with us so you like one small
percentage that wants to do these things could make it easier which is always what it boils down
to with everything all these things make a few people's you know what are they going to do okay
girls should get more business loans because you know their their cupcakes are not working then you go okay so that helps what
some small percentage of women that wants to be entrepreneurs or it encourages other people
to be entrepreneurs when they should the people that were doing it now should already
weren't even didn't even really want to do it what's the solution the solution is people are
different and they're going to organize themselves in different ways.
And that's OK.
No, it's not kind of not OK.
So they say a string of studies released over the past 11 months have found women are generally bearing more of the domestic burden from the pandemic, a trend that is having an impact on women's paid work.
A trend that is having an impact on women's paid work.
Yeah, it's tough to have a business when you have a ton of kids that you are in control of.
You have to rearrange.
It's like about rearranging your life around what you want and not what you want around your life.
I think that's like such a key distinction for people that are successful. It's like, you know, I knew this guy that,
uh,
he made a movie with me called,
uh,
X wins that he cast me.
I'm pretty funny actually.
Cause like he made it with all my crew and we went there and it was,
uh,
this,
this dude,
I talked about this a little on the page around,
but this dude that,
that made prom night and some other things.
And he was like a French guy.
And then the two guys got in like a fist fight on set,
him and the producer.
But he, he was like a realist. He was, he was like a real estate guy. And he was like a french guy and then the two guys got like a fist fight on set like him and the producer but he he was like a realist he was he was like a real estate guy and he was like he wanted to build this real estate empire he had some cash and he bought one and he was doing this
whole thing and by the end of it he had like 10 houses and he said he rearranged his whole life
around it so he would rearrange his days so he could uh night, you know, drive around and look for, you know,
real estate signs and try to get the first ones there. He made friends with all the people that
do real estate. He married a real estate agent. So he he developed his entire network around this
thing that he wanted to accomplish, as opposed to being like, OK, I want to have five kids.
I want to live here. I want to live here. And then being like, yeah, I think I want to start like a bit.
You know, you do it the other way around.
It's all freaking backwards for these people.
Sort of, I did a video this week that I'm going to come out next week, a street interview where I said that,
because a lot of people were talking about sex work and how they've been hurt by this. And I said, I got people to admit that
that it's been hurting the pimping industry. And don't you think the government should be
subsidizing pimping? And isn't there government overreach kind of going against like what I
actually say? But there's government overreach in the pimping industry. Like if you look at it,
you know, you have a situation where there's all
these laws and governments telling the pimps how to treat their property. And you think that's
going, oh, government overreach. And I got people to weigh in on how the pandemics affected the
pimping industry. They say in the case of women owned businesses, even while recovering, they
were still falling flatly below the historical average. While men surpassed their historical average soon after the recovery began,
said FreshBooks study.
Good work, boys.
I mean, thank you for writing this article about how sweet we were.
And they say in a presentation of the Status of Women's Committee,
the Status of Women Committee.
What a committee.
They just talk about blowjob techniques and what boys are cute.
She said the female-owned businesses tend to be newer and smaller and are having a harder time recovering.
For example, women-owned businesses were less likely to be fully opened, fully staffed, or doing normal sales.
One of the problems is the women's businesses weren't open yet.
It's always good when they
have to get into the nitty gritty
of like one of the reasons.
Also, one of the reasons why the women's businesses
weren't doing as good is because they had
not opened prior to the pandemic.
Just a storefront.
Really, it was just a plan on a napkin for a jewelry
store. So I'm an entrepreneur though.
Definitely, it was a guy. It's like the guy that has like, oh, I have an idea a jewelry store. So I'm an entrepreneur, though. Definitely is a guy.
It's like the guy that has like, oh, I have an idea for an app.
And they go, oh, yeah, it's a.
I'm an entrepreneur.
What do you have?
An idea for an app.
I'm a girl.
I have a business.
I haven't put up the website yet, but I'm in the process.
I've I've subscribed to a Wix profile.
So I'm about to pop that bad boy up.
Why are they included in the study?
That's the problem. The business wasn't open. Yeah, definitely. I can see how businesses that
weren't open potentially might do better than do worse during the pandemic that businesses
have been open during the pandemic. I have an idea for an app.
during the pandemic.
I have an idea for an app.
I actually do have a pretty fire idea.
So this is, and this is,
I'm gonna call it the Ryan Long app just so it's been patented.
And if anyone makes apps, you know, reach out to me.
We're gonna get into production on this app pretty soon
and reach out to my Silicon Valley boys.
But when people tour, everywhere you go,
the only way you see stuff, like, you know, a lot of people found out of my shows because I put the dates on YouTube, or maybe you listen to the podcast or
Instagram, Twitter, but there isn't really like a central site. You go to people's website,
but the truth is there should be a site where every, you know, artist speaker, even, uh, you
know, you could be, it could be sports teams could be on this app and what you
could do is you go like their page and it's kind of like tinder or bumble or whatever and that you
like their page and then you put your radius like 100 meters to your location and then anytime that
person's playing within 100 meters of your location it gives you a buzz so you'd be there
and be like oh you know whatever the fooers are playing here. If you like the Foo Fighters, crappy band, the Foo Fighters are playing my area,
you know, Ryan Long's, oh, he's 110 meters away or 110 miles away. I go, ah, that's a little far,
you know, whatever it is. So that's the app. And it's exclusively that that's the only thing it's
for. Every person that performs is on the app. Everyone signs up to all the people that they
like. And then it gives you a bump when they're going to be anywhere, depending on where you put your radius. And then you can
swipe through your things too. So anyone's your town, you swipe through the events and that's
what I, and you can follow like, you know, it could be like companies that do parties. Maybe
you're like, Oh, I like this party company. I'm going to subscribe to their thing. So it's all
events, basically like event bumble. That's my, and you could get, tell them like, you know,
I want to know two weeks in advance. I don't know. I want to know right when it's on sale,
you get to pick all your statuses for each person. That's the app. I'm going to make it.
So this is me documenting it right here. Then they say Martha McDonald, entrepreneur and
economic, honestly not. She's an economics professor in the Sobeys school of business
at St. Mary's university said women owned businesses are more likely to be in the service industries like retail accommodation and food services and tourism.
Yeah, that's probably basically it.
But again, it is all the problems with everything. You know, and me and Kurt Matzker were talking about this a little bit, but it's this idea that everyone wants these jobs that don't have enough jobs.
And it's like, and their idea is like, let's make those jobs easier.
And let's make, you know, let's subsidize them more.
Let's try to get more people in there.
Let's make it easy.
And you go, no, it's actually the opposite.
The problem is too many people want to do it.
If anything, it's too desirable.
That's the last thing you want to do is try to make it easier to be that.
What you want to do is discourage people from being that.
Make it harder.
Be like, yeah, this is not, this university course is really hard.
Instead of being like, oh, there's this job.
There's a hundred jobs.
Let's make this, make this program.
Like literally, if you want to be a blogger, it should be an eight-year course so no one does it.
And a very small amount of bloggers.
Because right now, anyone who goes to school for anything blog-related is coming out of school without a job.
The reason why people want to be bloggers instead of landscapers is because
a landscaping sucks and be some of these jobs, like whatever journalist,
comedian, the music, there's a, there was a perception that, Oh, that'll be like, cool.
You get cool points. You get paid in everything other than money instead of getting, you know,
Oh, we'll give you a raise. You're like, well, we can't give you more money. But however,
instead of getting, you know, oh, we'll give you a raise.
You're like, well, we can't give you more money.
But however, what we can give you is, you know, Twitter followers.
You get every currency except for dollar value.
Also, I did like doing the interview with Kurt.
I think that I think that guy's so funny, but it was funny to me.
Just the different comments.
You know how you always get the back to back like this guy rules. This guy sucks sucks there was like a few back-to-back being like i'm like way better
when it's just ryan and then the other guy being like oh it's my love from ryan has someone to
bounce stuff over or whatever and you're just like you can't please everyone you can't please anyone
so you just have to do what you think is funny and i think that goes for all of the business stuff, which is always such the best advice. You go, listen, just do what you like.
And then hopefully there's enough people out there that kind of think like you.
That's everything, whatever you're making, wherever you are, even dating.
It's like trying to have a personality that's specific.
And then there'll be someone for it.
Most people get
married most even fat cows still get married someone for everyone also I think that there's
certain people that I connect with and one of them is uh Kurt because I feel like there's a
certain breed of people and I find him in the same in a similar vein of me in that he's like
if you can get past the fact that we speak stupid and we probably have
add there's pretty good ideas there and he's pretty funny or really funny whatever but it's
kind of uh you know that's kind of like that's kind of how I see a certain type of person and it's like that I think that's why I kind of connect with know, that's kind of like, that's kind of how I see a certain type of person.
And it's like that.
I think that's why I kind of connect with them.
Like, that guy kind of is like my type of humor.
And they say, the evidence is quite clear.
The women have been more likely to be affected by the home responsibilities during the pandemic than men.
And also their business wasn't open.
So there's like kind of a few things going on.
One, the pandemic, you know,
they had to do more household chores.
And the second being that the business had not been open.
A lot of factors going on.
I'm going to announce a few dates
because again, we're hitting the road
and I'm going to soon,
I'm going to announce like a big batch.
So it's easier to promote
because it is hard when you're like,
oh, I'm doing this weekend.
And I'm like, okay, it's difficult.
My app has not been made yet.
So it's difficult to get the word out to the people.
But I'm going to be doing March 9th, Orlando, Florida.
The Orlando Improv.
March 10th, Tampa.
Side splitters.
And my boy, Danny Polishuk.
The not so great, the fat boy, Danny Polishuk, is going to be on the road with me.
I've been talking about some funny things too.
I was talking about this on the podcast, but the idea that the gay actors,
they're like, oh, gay roles should only be played by gay people.
And it's like, yeah, I mean, whatever.
But no, who shouldn't be against that?
Straight actors should be like, yeah, I've been saying this forever. When they gave my character a season arc where I'm
Bukkake and guys, I'd be like, there's got to be a gay guy to do this. But they did.
There was a rabbi that came out and he said that he thinks the vaccinations will make people gay.
He said that the Corona vaccine is making people gay gay which is to me the most hilarious way to come
out of the closet just like his wife walks in and he's sucking a dick the vaccine you think
talk to bill gates if you got an issue talk to the american government who freaking made me gay
so i was thinking it would be funny to do a a sketch of a gay rabbi so I looked on Amazon and ordered a rabbi costume
and I was like
pretty funny
gay rabbi and everything's very like
no it's the vaccine
I mean don't check my internet history
he's like you know
have we seen your brothel subscription
predates the vaccine
no no no that's you know
that's from something else.
Just walking around New York
like, oh, I don't want to have
to be stuck in this dick.
He's looking at gay porn
like, ah, Bill Gates.
It was fun to see
people at the shows.
And one funny thing is that
you kind of,
even talking to a lot of people
that follow me
and even when people,
see, a lot of people send me,
you know, messages and stuff like that. And that's one thing I do realize where I'm like,
that the people that follow me aren't stupid, which is sort of a blessing and a curse because
I can't get away with that much. People send me articles and be like, Oh, that thing you're
talking about, have you seen this? And it's like always like smarty pants stuff, even on the
Patreon, like ever. it's all like people
you can tell the people that kind of follow me aren't stupid so you go some people you look at
their fans you know and it's just like you go to the show and it's like a bunch of idiots i've done
i've done both i go shows where it's like people are dumb and you go it's a certain type of humor
you oh i can get away with anything here where it's like a lot of times and the things i do it's
like i can't get away with anything so it kind of's like a lot of times the things I do, it's like I can't get away with anything.
So it kind of keeps you on your toes.
But it's sort of like, I could use people following me that were like a tiny bit dumber.
Because I'm so fucking loopy that I just get caught on all my bullshit because I'm stupid.
But it kind of made me think about like, so then what, you know, if I'm stupider, what are you better at? And I think
it's that you're good at putting things succinctly. And in a way, you're like,
funny and understand people dynamics maybe better than other people are at least able to point them
out. But I was it made me think about like, what does make the best comedians. And I, I came to what I thought was somewhat of a conclusion.
And I, cause I've always saying that with everyone, it's never about, you know, I don't
really believe in the word genius, even though I probably use it sometimes. I don't really believe
in the, unless you're just a high 160 IQ. I think it's more certain people are like so suited for certain things.
That's why certain people are suited for,
you know, more the way that Jordan Peterson
talks about his personality test that he loves.
The conservative person is more suited
for running a company
and maybe a more liberal minded person
is suited for starting a company.
And I think what is the person
that makes the best standup comic?
And it probably applies to a few other things too
but I think it was like the perfect combination of critical thinking and abstract thinking
so I think that a lot of people that are really good at critical thinking aren't so good when it
comes to sort of imagination and imagining you kind of work in the lines and a lot of people
that are you know work in the abstract a lot of times you kind of end up with these sort of artist
type personalities that you know they their life's a mess and they they can't look at anything
rationally and they end up you know whatever as a activist that's kind of brainwashed and all this
stuff and i think that that would be making the best, like the best
filmmakers. I think the best comedians are the good mix of being able to critical, critically
think and abstract think was probably in a lot of jobs. You want, maybe are better suited for one.
If you're just like straight up an artist, like drawing on a easel. Yeah. I don't know how much
critical thinking would help you in certain jobs. If you're an engineer, maybe if you're like an
architect, you want some abstract thinking. But I think for a lot of jobs, like it's like
problem solving, critical thinking, like there's not that much benefit to kind of having this like
whimsical side of you. So that's what I came up with. If I was to say, make a graph of maybe what
could be a, you know, a personality determination of who would be good
at this. Also super funny is, was making me laugh a lot. There's something like,
it's so crazy. Like that, I think some of the, a lot of these jobs have changed so much because
the world moves so quickly. And there used to be, you know,
the old thing was whether it's any job, like it's all about like mining for gold, right? Like you
work forever to find out this one thing and everything shifted so much to like being consistently
really good all the time. And there's obviously, you know, things were like that before, but
especially in like the arts and certain entrepreneurial fields. I did that when I did the, the woke priest video, one of the lines I said,
uh, that I had to take out, I go, you know, these people are more, you know, in the old religions,
they were more concerned with taking down people like Howard Stern and Ozzy Osbourne and whatever. I think I left the Howard
Stern line in, but this was a different one. And then I said, the new, they're more concerned with
taking down. And then I listed off a bunch like, you know, whatever, Tekashi69, Kid Rock, whatever,
just like any like band that said the wrong things. And I said, Marilyn Manson. That's what
I said. The old world, they're taking down guys like Marilyn Manson that's what I said the old that
world they're taking down guys like Marilyn Manson and when I recorded that then two days later
I edited it so I recorded I edited that night two days later I woke up and the Marilyn Manson thing
I was like oh they tried to take down him too so I had to take it out of my thing because it didn't
make sense anymore and it's like that's how quickly you can literally film a video and two days later it's irrelevant
and it wasn't even supposed to be a topical reference it's like so freaking quick you just
be like so on it all the time I kind of remember I feel like it was more generations you know
there's always everyone's parents oh my day different. But I feel like now it's like five years later
and I'm 35.
I've been,
that's why anyone who's been alive long enough,
you don't have to be alive 10 years
to be like, holy shit, this changed a lot.
Whereas if you go to the 80s to the 90s,
it changed a bit.
From 10 years ago to now,
it changed a lot.
I don't think there's a bigger period in time
where it changed as much as quickly as it has right now.
That'd be my opinion.
I remember, like, if I look back to when I was a kid
and I look now, I go, there's some great...
I was just thinking the other day,
because I went to Virgin Islands
and I was taking this cab driver,
and they all try to scam you, these cab drivers.
They go, oh, we'll charge you by
the minute and then we get to the thing and it was like eight minutes and the guy's like 25 dollars
and you're like you motherfucker so you had to time them you basically have to go like okay and
the timer's starting and we pop it up the thing so the guy can't scam you because they're all
their whole game is scamming tourists but the when i was when I was uh younger my like probably my like my best friend and his
stepbrother who was also a close friend they their his stepdad who was the other guy's dad
he would pick us up blasted drunk and then he'd make us sit in the bed of the truck and then be
and then he'd make us sit in the bed of the truck and then be swerving all over the room i mean like 10 years old just in the truck just like holding on for dear life and you go and you
would never even tell your parents it would just be like oh made it out alive and you go yeah that
probably that kind of shit wouldn't fly as much as kids these days, I feel like. That guy would be on blast on the internet.
One time we were at, we went away to a cottage,
and then we went to a bar, and we were like drinking,
making these guys, 20, met these guys,
and the guy comes up, he goes,
ah, yo, we'll drive you guys home.
We go, fuck it, yeah, we get in this guy's car.
Guy's tuned the fuck up.
Tuned.
Like we should, you know, it was one of those things, oh yeah, well, fuck yeah, well fuck yeah free drive home let's get in guys like swerving at the wheel he's and then he starts
telling us he goes last time my brother actually died on this road from drunk driving we go what
this guy's drunk driving us home and he tells us his brother died on the road that he's driving us
from this guy's going a hundred miles an hour and frigging swervy roads,
like country roads where it's basically one.
Like if you do run into a car,
you'd have to inch by each other.
This guy's cooking.
We're like,
I can look back and go,
that was crazy.
That one wasn't a change.
I'm sure that guy's still out there in the country.
Just doing wild ass shit.
Just fucking road pops, bud. But there's certain things where this is the most time it's ever changed.
Anyone that's been alive for 10 years, I think always, especially now, it takes two political
cycles to realize. And that's why a lot of these like 22 year olds or people that are, you know,
in their 30s, but have only been paying attention to politics since Trump, it takes about two political cycles
to kind of start realizing, oh, this shit's bullshit. None of these people, they're all
lying to you. They all go back and forth, say the same thing. And then they go bomb a bunch
of people in the middle East, give you your bullshit, play the game. Oh, what's the fake stuff we can give you
to not actually, you know, do anything good
and we can keep giving our friends money, all this stuff.
It takes two political cycles, I think.
And most people, it's like they're already,
you can even see people that like came online
during Trump and then now with Biden,
they're kind of already like,
this guy's not good.
And then, you know, when this whole thing wraps up,
it'll go back to the other. I feel like a lot of those, any of those people that aren't stupid will kind of already like this guy's not good and then you know when this whole thing wraps up it'll go back to the other i feel like a lot of those any of those people that aren't stupid will kind of
be like oh oh this thing's fucking rigged dude but if you only were you know started paying
attention then so i think that's a lot of people's problems is like you need about 10 years in politics to sort of see how, how to sort of see how this game works.
I watched,
um,
Chris D'Elia's apology.
If any of you guys saw,
and a lot of people talked about this.
So my point,
I just,
I wasn't going to do like a full,
you know,
run through of it.
I had something else I want to talk about.
I mean,
obviously it was kind of funny how it was like low key bragging, you know he came out and he was just basically like you know I'm so
sorry that I've been just smashing so much fucking puss dude my dick is honestly I needed this break
because my dick was starting to hurt it was just five six chicks a night he was one step away from
being like I smashed this chick I smashed this like showing
pictures of like hot ass chicks hot fucking models and their hot Instagram models and their 25s like
yeah I'm so sorry when I went over to I was on tour in Iowa and I smashed this supermodel and
and in my own city my own city I smashed these three girls in one night. And then, lo and behold, you'd think that'd be enough.
I went to San Jose the next night.
Threesome with two fucking models.
So there was a lot.
It was a little braggy, but there was something that I want.
Like, I kind of did.
What he was saying, you know, it's all publicity and it's all like, I'm sure that's the statement they came up with and whatever.
Pretty good, probably, in terms of that stuff.
But there is something to be said about,
I was talking to Andrew Schultz about this and he was kind of like,
it's good.
He's like,
yeah,
cause I got girls before comedy.
I think a lot of people that kind of get successful.
I seen a lot of people that just got a good job and they kind of,
you know,
maybe they were fat before
and they just go fucking buck wild with women
and it becomes this crazy addiction because
they didn't get that out of their system right so then
I mean on Crystal Lee I guess he was sort of a nerdy
dude like I would have thought he probably was better
with girls before but allegedly not he was kind of
like you know I started getting pussy
but I seen that
so much times and me
and my friends all of us know, when you're fucking
before mine happened young, luckily enough that I think now it's like, you know, I kind of have,
I've tricked myself into the mentality that like pussy fucking the Drake thing. Like you want to
get nothing done, spend all your time on pussy. But the question is, so what do you do? And this is where I think I differ from what everyone else is going to say.
You know, how do you actually, if you're the guy, it's like, it's a game that you can't win.
On this Bumble, you know, I was talking about that on stage, the guys that are just like,
I'm so fucking tired.
I'm just so tired.
Just been nonstop on Bumble. Can barely hold down a job.
I'm so tired.
Just nonstop.
It's an addiction.
But how do you beat it?
And what people will tell you,
you know,
no, you need to replace it with family.
You know what I mean?
You need to love your family.
You need to work on yourself
so you don't have that hole to fill.
All that stuff.
Which is all false.
It's bad advice.
What you need is a new game that you can do that with.
For me, that was a little bit stand up.
For other people, it can be a little bit making money.
This is what you do.
If you're the person that's addicted to that shit, you either thing is like, oh, change
your personality.
So you're not an addict.
No, no, no. Use that. Every good part of your personality isn't bad part of your personality.
Use that to do something good. That's the only, that's the only real solution. If you're the guy
that's like fucking just ever like your whole life, fucking, I got head last night. Like that's
your whole thing. Be that about making money. Be that about crypto.
Be the crypto guy.
And just indulge yourself
and that your whole life's that.
Go to sleep thinking about that instead.
And then you just have a girl.
That idea that you're going to replace the thrill
of trying to get all these girls
and that whole, that thing,
you're going to replace that with one?
The stick with the old wife barrel you're not gonna do it
you're just gonna sit there and be like why isn't this working you need a new thing for me stand-up
kind of became that and then I was able to you know think about this I even I'm just one thing
is I'll tell you what the with the Instagram stuff, everyone's like, Instagram,
you're looking at this, you're looking at this.
It's all that.
It's bad news.
And we all do it.
And I'm guilty as anybody.
I've sort of now, I look at even the shows, I kind of like look at the ticket sales and stuff like that.
And I'm like, this is bad still, but it's a healthier thing to be looking at.
I gotta think it's healthier to be like looking at my tickets and be like, okay, what can
I do there?
I think that's healthier than just like refreshing fucking likes.
So you take your frigging stupid degeneracy of the type of person that can't do anything in moderation.
And then you put it into something positive.
Be the guy that works.
The answer is not ever.
You know, your chickle salt. Yeah, you just fucking, just one girl. Learn the guy that works. The answer is not ever, you know, your chickle salt.
Yeah. You just fucking, you just one girl learned to love one girl. That's not going to do it.
You need to be like that about frigging your job. And then you go, you leave the girl's stuff behind. You go, you know, you gotta, you gotta keep your sexual desire up a little. You gotta
have sex with your wife or girl or whatever. You can't just be like, oh, I'm completely out of the game.
You know, you just be like, this becomes a thing.
It's completely different from that other thing.
You have your girl and then find that focus.
Put that fire somewhere else.
In the back of your mind, you could always be like, you know what?
If I ever do want to get back into that game, I can think of it like I'm actually helping.
If I'm getting more successful and more money, staying with the girl, being this, out of that
game, if I ever do go back to it, I'm better positioned for SNZ. That's the only way to have your brain to have your brain wired in a way that that is helping you
there's a funny i was kind of like um some people are talking about the idea that like
you know it's it's interesting that like we all kind of like it's you know i go on these podcasts
and it's always like you know they want to they want a lot of times i don't want to do it's, you know, I go on these podcasts and it's always like, you know, they want to, they want, a lot of times I don't want to do it because they put me on and then they want to put
like the headline of the article, like Ryan Long destroys cancel culture. And it's like, not,
you know, it's not the only thing we want to talk about. We want to just make jokes and we want to
do all this other stuff. But, and it is, it's like, we all, you know, it's this thing that we
all like talk about and you're, and I'm like, fuck, do I talk about this too much? And you go,
this thing that we all like talk about and you're and I'm like fuck do I talk about this too much and you go the issue is we don't have fuck I don't want to talk about this we all got conscripted to
this army that's what my friend Patrick said he goes we got suscripted to this freaking army 10
years ago I'd be doing what Daniel Tosh is doing maybe I wouldn't do a clip show I'd do something
else but you that's what a trajectory of a guy like me looked like then. You go, we had no choice.
There's this whole thing that's like against you.
So you, what are you going to do?
Bend over?
So you like, you got forced to.
So it's not really like you want to.
It's like, that's the elephant in the room in all the scenarios.
You go on stage and you're not going to mention the elephant in the room of the most
biggest like phenomenon that's in culture that's happening to everyone in any facet of life
of course you are sort of seems like these people i thought i was thinking this it's like
one of the things that they want is like a monopoly on not being racist
a lot of these people are kind of like,
we have the only anecdote for people that aren't racist.
So like, we're the not racist.
We have a monopoly.
So it's like anyone who disagrees with us is racist.
And if you want the crown of not being racist,
you need to like come subscribe to our things.
And you go, no, that's not true.
Plenty of people are your side of racist, plenty of the
others, not racist. You don't have a monopoly on not being racist. I think a lot of times when you
can kind of like isolate those little factors kind of helps because then, you know, someone's
talking to you about, well, this guy's, you don't have a monopoly on not being racist. Like you
don't, you don't own the patent on not being racist.
You know, I was talking about this on the Patreon a little bit more with Chris, if you want to check it out.
I had Chris from Brooklyn.
He came to Philadelphia with me and me and him had like a kind of a fired up conversation
on the Patreon because there's a lot of shit that happened this week and we are like going
through all of it.
But the most important part was that I thought it was when you go out and do comedy. And when
I'm sitting there like writing jokes and making funny videos, I go, you know, when you talk about
the cancel thing or coming up with a good point, that's the, I was like, I got so much more excited
about that. I get fucking fired up my body, you know, I get jazzed and it really is. You're like,
Oh, maybe I'm like a, you know, the champagne socialist. I'm a champagne capitalist.
And it really is, you're like, oh, maybe I'm like a, you know, the champagne socialist.
I'm a champagne capitalist.
Like I, but no, I, you know, I go both ways.
Sometimes I'm the other thing where I get freaking jazzed up about that. But the most thing, you know, I like analyzing the issues, but I'm far more concerned with
like really good pieces of art and making like hours.
And that's the, that's the thing that I'm like excited that
I get to keep doing. And it's been cool to have everyone be coming out to the shows next week.
I'm releasing the feminist mom video was one of my, one of my bigger videos, and I'm doing a pretty
funny one that was the feminist homeschool. So it's feminist mom again, she's back, she's back.
And she's, um, this is what it looks like when the feminist mom's homeschooling.
But it has one of my favorite lines that was really making me laugh.
And the idea was she's talking about how babies are made and she goes.
So babies are made when sex takes place between a trans man and a trans woman or a trans man and a man or a trans woman and a woman or in some cases a man and a woman that took me a while to get that line out when we were
filming but now i got it and i was like ah me and danny were laughing so i think that's a pretty
funny one that'll be out monday tune in the patreon if you want to hear my conversation
with chris from bookland i've been ryan long thank you for subscribing to the BoyzCast.