The Breakfast Club - Best Of Full Interview: Gia Casey Talks New Book "Real Life, Real Love", Cheating Scandals, Rags To Riches + More

Episode Date: December 31, 2024

Best of 2024 - Recorded April 2023 - Gia Casey Talks New Book "Real Life, Real Love", Cheating Scandals, Rags To Riches. Listen For More!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Hey everyone, I'm Madison Packer, a pro hockey veteran going on my 10th season in New York. And I'm Anya Packer, a former pro hockey player and now a full Madison Packer stan. Anya and I met through hockey and now we're married and moms to two awesome toddlers, ages two and four. And we're excited about our new podcast, Moms Who Puck, which talks about everything from pro hockey to professional women's athletes to raising children and all the messiness in between. So listen to Mom's Who Pock on the iHeartRadio app, Apple podcasts, or wherever you get your

podcasts. Happy holidays from me, Michael Rappaport. My gift to you is a free subscription to the I Am Rappaport Stereo Podcast where I discuss entertainment, sports, politics, and anything and everything that catches my attention. I am here to call it as I see it and there's a whole lot of things catching my eyes these days. Listen to the I Am Rappaport Stereo Podcast on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcast, and wherever you get your podcast. Hi, I'm Dani Shapiro, host of the hit podcast, Family Secrets. How would you feel if when you met your biological father for the first time, he didn't even

say hello? And what if your past itself was a secret and the time had suddenly come to share that past with your child? These are just a few of the powerful and profound questions we'll be asking on our 11th season of Family Secrets. Listen to season 11 of Family Secrets on the iHeartRadio app, Apple podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

The forces shaping markets and the economy are often hiding behind a blur of numbers. So that's why we created The Big Take from Bloomberg podcasts, to give you the context you need to make sense of it all. Every day in just 15 minutes, we dive into one global business story that matters. You'll hear from Bloomberg journalists like Matt Levine. A lot of this Beamstock stuff is I think embarrassing to the SEC. Follow the Big Take podcast on the iHeart radio app app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen.

People, my people, what's up? This is Quetzalove. Man, I cannot believe we're already wrapping up another season of Quetzalove Supreme. Man, we've got some amazing guests lined up to close out the season, but, you know, I don't want any of you guys to miss all the incredible conversations we've had so far. You know, I don't want any of you guys to miss all the incredible conversations we've had so far. I mean, we talked to A. Marie, Johnny Marr, E, Jonathan Schechter, Billy Porter, and so many more. Look, if you haven't heard these episodes yet, hey, now's your chance. You gotta check them out.

Listen to Questlove Supreme on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcast, or wherever you get your podcast. ["Breakfast Club"] Wake that ass up early in the morning. The Breakfast Club. Morning everybody, it's DJ Envy, Angela Yee, Charlamagne the guy, we are the Breakfast Club. We got a special guest in the building. Never met her before. She's an actress, she's an author, she's a mom. Ladies and Never met her before. She's an actress. She's an author.

She's a mom. Ladies and gentlemen, Gia. She's a wife. And my wife. Yes, Gia. Hello. Welcome. Gia what? That's just one name? She's like Madonna, Beyonce, that's just one name? Okay, okay, okay, okay, okay. How nervous are you, sir? Seriously. I know. He's been acting real weird all morning.

I'm fine. That's what makes you nervous, boo? No. You guys have a book out, Real Life, Real Love, Life Lessons on Joy, Pain, and the Magic that holds us together, and I've been dying to ask you this question, Gia, in person in this room. How do you feel about Charlamagne and Envy flirting with each other every day?

It kind of turns me on. What? We didn't expect that answer. No, I'm nervous. It kind of turns me on. What? We didn't expect that answer. Now I'm nervous. What the hell? I had that effect on people. Okay. Explain.

I think it's a little strange. But I'm amused by it. It's just brotherly love. Does anything go too far ever? No, it's all in good fun and entertainment. That's all it is. I don't mind it. So you didn't mind when he gave me the ass?

First of all, context please. Literally or actually. Context, everybody doesn't watch the show every day. Context please, okay? Wait, can you guys sound bite that? When he gave me a mold of his ass. That's right, and it wasn't my ass, it was a mold of a ass. Yes.

I thought it was a mold of your actual ass. No, no, my shit ain't that fat. And then what about when they touch each other and stuff? That's never happened. Man, we don't touch each other. Stop it. You're just making stuff up. I've never seen them touch each other. That hasn't happened. You want to tell me something I need to know?

Well, no, they like rub up brush against each other if they're walking out the door at some time. That's not true. They threaten to rub up against each other. We don't ever do it They go in the revolving door together that happened one time Explain that now I need answer it was stupid. I don't even know how that Was really stupid No, it wasn't. I don't even know how it happened. One is in, and then one makes his way in. We were all together walking around. It was so stupid.

You don't just fall into a ball and dormant. All we did was giggle, because it was so stupid. We had to giggle our way through it. You just added insults, Andrea. You're sitting there in the one slot, giggling together. We just giggled. So stupid. Anyway, back to the matter at hand. I don't lie.

Real life, real love. What is that magic that holds y'all together, you think? How would you describe it? Whenever I find that people come to our house or are around us, I think they're kind of surprised at how much fun we have together. I find him to be very charming and charismatic. And one of the things that I love most about him

is his boyish nature. So we really have a lot of fun together. And we always have since we first met. The first week we spent together, I thought to myself, wow, he's a lot of fun. Like he's like a friend, you know? And that's part of the magic. You knew that this was the person

you were gonna spend the rest of your life with? After about two weeks of knowing him, yes. But he knew before y'all even spent a day together. Explain. Before we even spent a day together? Well, when I first seen you, I mean, I wrote in a book that I thought you were beautiful and amazing. And the first time I saw you, you were actually running track. And for people that don't know, you know, track, she used to... Explain track.

That was a good one, I liked that. It was a skimpy outfit and you know, Gia had you know, big double D's and I would basically stalk her outside and just watch her run track and watch her breast-bottling. I don't like that word, don't say stalk. You know, I was stalking her. Yeah, but that's actually what he was doing.

I thought he was a young man. It was actually stalking and I would see him, I would see him sitting with his friends in this bright blue Con Edison van because that's what his parents bought him to transfer his DJ equipment from Sweet 16 to Sweet 16. That's what he was DJing at the time. I just had a Con Edison van, it was cheap back then.

And I would see it parked behind the fence. I'm thinking to myself like, yo, why is this van there every day at track practice? Is the power out of every van? Yo, that is crazy. Yes, it was bright blue. He wasn't low.

He was not low. And he was just sitting in the van doing who knows what. And then one day he emerged. Actually, babe, do you remember one day he emerged from the the van and approached me and kicked it and I was like, oh So you're that weirdo? That's in the van. It's all about kids. Yeah She was 15. I was 16. We went to the same high school. So and here you guys skipped a grade, right? Yes All right, so then initially so envy you say that you knew that she was gonna be your wife like right away You think it was before y'all even spoke?

When you were just stalking her? No, when we actually spoke and, you know, I found out how, you know, beautiful she was inside and outside and how smart she was and caring and she was just that, she was the one. She was the most beautiful thing I've ever seen in my life and the most precious thing. So I was like, this is gonna be my wife. Mm-hmm. I want people to get the book, but I do want, you know, to explain how do you keep reinventing the relationship?

When you start that young, now, any of you's 50-something, you know what I mean? You're much, much younger, but how do you keep reinventing? How do you keep reinventing? I think that that's part of the magic. We don't have to try. We don't intentionally, we do a lot of things intentionally and deliberately, but we don't intentionally reimagine the relationship and act on that. The only thing that I would say that we're

good about is keeping it sexy and making sure that that part of our relationship doesn't get too monotonous and doesn't get stale. So we have a lot of fun in that space. But we don't have to think like, God, how am I going to stop being bored of you? Or how am I going to get to a point where you don't annoy me anymore? He legitimately does not annoy me. I look forward to his phone calls every day. And we probably speak on the phone about maybe eight or nine, 10 times a day because he's away a lot.

So he calls me on his way to the breakfast club. He calls me on his way home from the breakfast club. He calls me if something happens. He calls me incessantly. I'm never like, oh, you again. I'm like, oh, him again. It's just that feeling that I've always had that no matter what ups or downs we were going through,

that never left me. Now he told us a story about the cowboy outfit that he wears. He told you about that? Yeah. Wait, wait, wait. The cowboy outfit in college? With the assless chaps? There's no assless chaps.

They were! Yeah, you told us about that. Hold on, wait, Rashawn, did you actually tell them about that? He did. Like on air or in private? I forgot I told y'all about that. He did. Because if it was in private, this is a whole double cross.

Right now. He told us he dressed up as a cowboy in his... Why are you looking at me like that? Because I remember that day. Okay. Because I remember that day, because after he told the story, he goes... He did. And I was like, what?

He did. When we were in college, yeah, we went through a stage where we were doing a lot of... Role playing. Role playing. Yeah. And one night, I dared him to be a cowboy. So we went and got the cowboy outfit. He had the big brown hat.

And then he had the little holsters and everything. And babe, do you remember I took pictures? Where are those? Are they in the book? About maybe three years after, he made me physically burn them on the grill. He put them on the grill and told me I have to light it. Yeah, they don't Know what y'all talk about role-playing the book

You say you like to put on the rock nation paper playing hat and you go what's my name? I didn't say Jigga. I didn't contribute to that chapter. Okay, that wasn't my work So he wasn't lying they were ashless chaps, yeah, yeah, he had a whole it was a whole thing I just pulled the you on you Gia. He did not tell us that Get my book and you will learn a slew of tactics What you want out of life, okay It was a holster by the way, they were holsters. It was a holster. What up with some other dress up things you guys? Right. Um, it was more so me dressing up.

And he was just like the recipient of that. That was one little. And that's why it was a dare, because it was kind of supposed to be a joke. But he never really dressed up. One time I was a nurse and he was a doctor. That was once. Did you really burn the pictures?

I really did. Really? In front of him. Wow. I would have kept those just in case. Put those in the safe. I have the negatives. OK, I was going to share that. In case have kept those just in case. I would have. Put those in the safe. I have the negatives. Okay, I was gonna share that.

Oh! In case anything ever goes left in our relationship, I will ruin his entire reputation. Oh my God. Or he'll never be able to work again. Am I crushing over to a new audience? Goodness gracious. Oh, we got that covered.

Definitely. So how was it writing this book for both of you? Cause I know COVID hit, you guys had planned to put this out earlier and then COVID hit. So what was it like for y'all actually sitting down and reliving some of these moments? Well, COVID and the quarantine was great

for us and our family. It affected different people differently, but we really realized that we could spend damn near 100% of our time together and love it. When the quarantine lifted, everybody in my house was kind of sad about that. But we did take that opportunity to write the book. And some of it was fun.

Some of it was fun. It was nice to be creative and get your thoughts down on paper. It was work. But a lot of it was difficult. I'm a very open person. I'm a realist. Rashaun, I think, had a difficult time because he had to relive a lot of the negative things

that transpired in our relationship. And he can tend to be surface in some respects, where you ask him a question, he gives you an answer. I'm a lot more of an in-depth person, I think critically about things, and when we would go over these chapters that he's assigned to write, I would ask him questions like,

okay, you can't just answer it with a yes or a no or a simple blanket. One question would mean 10 more questions to really get to the meat. And I had to keep reiterating, we're writing this book so that people have something tangible a reference point for them to make changes in their lives if necessary or to recognize that the person that you're with needs to make changes in their lives and it was a journey it was a journey but I think it was difficult

yeah no for me it was difficult I had to relive a lot of the F-boy-ish I put you through. And you forget about a lot of it because you don't have to relive it. But then when you start reliving it. No, you forget about a lot of it. Yes, you forget. I didn't forget nothing. I think it's men, that's the point though, right?

Because it's like, we don't realize how much we do hurt our women. Is that true though? Yeah, I think so. I don't think we realize how deep that pain goes. That sounds like an okey-doke to me. No, I don't think we, until you actually sit down and have those, you know, uncomfortable conversations,

you don't realize how much you infected your woman. If your wife cheated on you and told you that she would have no idea how much that it's did to hurt you, would that make sense to you? Probably not, but I mean mean men don't make sense. You believe that. You believe that you're born inherently with like a deficit. Not a deficit, but I just don't think... A common sense. I don't think we're thinking about it, you know

what I mean? Like we like that's the sad part. It's selfish. And that's what keeps you from doing it in the future, you know what I mean? Because you do not want to hurt the woman that you love. And it's so crazy because I saw that with my pops. Like I saw the pain that that caused my mom with his infidelity. So in my mind, I was like, damn, I'm about to make the same mistake.

So I think it is difficult when you got to relive it because you don't want to talk about it because you don't want to trigger you. You know, some people feel- I don't get triggered though. Damn. What? What?

That scared me just now. I was about to call security. Get out of here. No, once I got to a point, and it was a process. It was a long process, it was years. But once I got to a point where I accepted that it was my job to move on because I decided to forgive him

and because he had done all of the work and then some to regain my trust, to earn grace from me. I got to a point where I no longer wanted to punish and I didn't have that inherent need to see him suffer. Because when you hurt, and you say it all the time, hurt people, hurt people. When you're hurt, you want, not just people, you want the person that hurt you to hurt.

And anytime that I felt any type of way, I made sure that he felt some type of way. So once I learned how to forgive, and that was a process because I wasn't necessarily a forgiving person, before everything was very black and white to me, not very much gray. But once I learned and I understood that

that's what was expected from me of God, I had to commit to that and do my best to live up to what forgiveness meant. And that's what set me free because when you forgive you don't forgive To ease the burden from the other person you forgive to ease the burden from you Well, what you guys did together like you had to work on forgiveness and when you said, okay I'm gonna you know have to move on from this but what was the work that he did that let you know? Okay, he's serious

and you know, I can finally just say I'm not getting triggered anymore, I'm going to let this go? Well, one of the first things was I realized that he understood the impact of what had happened, what he did. He understood it. He didn't just accept it and was accountable for it, but he actually understood. He would do things that a lot of men wouldn't do. He would sit there through those eight hour conversations

locked in a room. He answered every question that I had, and I had a lot of questions. And he answered them all truthfully. And you know, when you ask somebody a a question and you can tell by their answer because I mean the answers weren't pretty They weren't things that I would have wanted to hear He went through all of the the sufferation as I call it and he did it until Because a lot of guys when they mess up and mean, a lot of them have told me,

I have friends that have gone through it, it's like, listen, I did it, I apologize, I said I was never gonna do it again, I mean that ish, but it's like, every day, I'm being punished, I'm being punished, I'm being reminded, it's like, let it go, I apologize. Like, what more do you want from me, blood? He never took that approach with me.

It was the until, until you are good, until you are healed. If I have to be a punching bag, I will be that. If I have to be a doormat, I will be that. I will do anything that it makes to survive this because I cannot be without you. And he proved it every single day. It was as though, and he was like this before,

but it was even more so during this time. It was as though, and he was like this before, but it was even more so during this time. It was as though he communicated to me that the only thing that he wanted was to make me happy. And that's pretty much how he lives his life. He lives his life every day waking up thinking like, damn, how can I make his life easier today? How can I make Gia happier today? And every day almost, he does something sweet, something special. He works so hard, you guys know, he might sleep three hours

a night but he'll come home and if I have a tray on the bed and I was eating he'll come into the room and take it down for me or be like, babe can I bring you up some food if I wasn't eating? Like he does special things but to answer your question it was the until, it was the indefinite, and it was the willingness to do any and everything to earn what he lost back. And was there ever a question in your mind? I know there was a point when you thought, no matter what I do, she's never gonna take me back.

Was there ever a time when you were like... If you cry, I'm gonna come over there and hug you. I'm just letting you know. You better hold them tears. I'm gonna hug the shit out of you from the back if you cry in front of your wife. Oh my goodness. But yes, they have to see a question yes.

Catch that little feel. At that point, at that point I just, I didn't know what was gonna happen, but I was like, I have to be honest to at least get my friend back. And at that point, I didn't know what gear was gonna do. I thought it was a rap, but I was like, I still wanted my friend.

I still wanted somebody I can talk to. I still wanted a relationship with her that we can bounce. She's all I knew since I was 16, so I still wanted my friend back. And she's Jamaican, so that could have been forever beef. That could have been forever beef. But you know, it's interesting that you didn't kick him out of the house, you were still polite to him,

you still wanted to maintain a co-parenting friendship. I feel like that hurts more when you're like, we're not having sex and I might end up with somebody else one day, but we're cool. That hurts more, I think, sometimes than just completely being nasty to somebody and cutting them off. Yes, well, when I found out divorce was imminent,

it was never a question. I was raised by a very strong mother who taught me that if a man ever disrespects you to that degree, then you walk. So it didn't matter how much I loved Rashaun and how much I would have missed him. It didn't matter if I cried every night. It did not matter one iota how I felt. The only thing that was important to me

was that I operated with my head and not my heart, and that I did what I always said that I was going to do. So when I found out, when it was confirmed for me, and you can read the book and see the entire- Now we want you to go get the book. The entire story. But when he confirmed it, we were in a parking lot. And when I drove away from that parking lot,

it was a few days before Christmas, and his mother was at the house helping me decorate because we were hosting that year. But I walked into the house and I told her, I said, Christmas is canceled. And she said, what do you mean Christmas is canceled? And I said, well mean Christmas is canceled. And I said, well, I just found out that Rashaun cheated on me and we're getting a divorce.

So there's not going to be any Christmas this year. At least I'm not hosting. Yo, it's wild that people actually cancel Christmas. I thought that was just a figure of speech. No. Christmas is canceled. If this should happen, we canceling Christmas. I cancel Christmas.

You cancel Christmas. Yeah. Cancel Christmas. Well, in the sense of us hosting, I wasn't going to cancel it for our children, but we didn't have to decorate for 30 people to come over. And my lovely mother-in-law, hi, mama, she defended her beautiful son with everything that she could because- Them bitches lying.

Pretty much. Yeah. And when she said something to that effect, I said, but for the fact that he just told me that it was true. And he came home maybe 20 or 30 minutes later, and it was a whole thing, right? But I was adamant that we were getting a divorce.

I contacted an attorney, paid an attorney. It was decided. But thankfully, there were a whole host of things that happened that convinced me that God had other plans. What did God say to you? God didn't say anything to me. See, I was raised Catholic. I went to Catholic schools my whole life. So did Rashaun. But I was never spiritual. You know,

I got to school and said the Hail Mary and the Our Father. And, you know, if I prayed at night, it was like, thank you, God, for all my blessings. Thank you for my life. You know, can I get that new Nintendo for Christmas? You know, I wasn't raised with this This deeply instilled faith where I felt as though I knew God and I lived differently because I Didn't know God in that way So when God revealed himself to me, and he may have tried for years, you see, but I wouldn't have, I didn't speak his language. I would have never been able to interpret God trying to reach out to me. So I really believe that this happened so that me particularly, not even Roshan, so that I could be humbled, you know, because I thought so highly of our relationship I thought so highly of Rashaun because he was despite what he did. He was a wonderful husband a wonderful father I

Was utterly blindsided when this happened because there was no red flags within our house. He was thoughtful affectionate kind sweet Generous romantic everything that you would want him to be with a little dose of crazy and there's there is that in the in the book I'm not saying that it was amazing. I was really blindsided But when God spoke he spoke through other people and when he found when I found out what happened it's funny we were being approached for reality shows at the time and funny we were being approached for reality shows and and

when he took someone's terrible advice to apologize to me on the radio they make our personal woes private, yeah our personal woes public I didn't know though. I didn't know what he was going through. He'd be in it laying on the floor. I didn't know what he'd be like out of it. I'm like, yo, what the fuck is your problem? I didn't know what it was.

So as I'm prodding him, like what the hell is going on? I didn't know that was coming. Oh, okay. Yeah, I didn't know that was coming. So when he apologized, you didn't know what he was apologizing for. No, he would literally come in here and be like, laid out on the floor in the fetal position the whole show. Like, he would not be here with us.

He wouldn't be present. And I just knew something was wrong. You should call him out in the air and apologize. I was like, I'm going to say it. So I'm like, no, I was like, when he gets on the air, I'm going to ask him on the air, what the fuck is his problem? Because I was tired of asking him behind the scenes. And so I asked him on the air.

I didn't know that was coming, though. That was a terrible idea. But maybe it was the same dose of common sense that you guys are talking about men. Yes but when it was made public my one of my best friends his name is Rashid he's the husband of my other best friend her name is Sasha. He called to see if what he had heard was true because he thought that maybe it was just something being drummed up because we're supposed

to be on a reality show or something like that. And when he called, I said, no, everything that you heard is absolutely true. And it's a terrible story. As you said, you know, Rashom was circling the drain at that time. And Rashid decided to come to New York from California because he lives in LA.

But we had a very, a horrible event happen at our home. And you can read about it in the book. But mind you, Rashid didn't like me. Rashid, you know, he always thought our relationship was toxic, which was- You were too controlling. He thought I was too controlling, which I was at mind you, Rashid didn't like me. Rashid, you know, he always thought our relationship was toxic Which you were too controlling. He thought I was too controlling which I was at times But so he didn't like me So the fact that he flew in to try to save this relationship meant a lot because he already didn't like me

I thought you said Tyree saved the relationship. That's coming. That was the sign. We're telling too much. Well, what happened was he flew in and I didn't want him there because our marriage was ending and I just wanted to be by myself, but he insisted. He said, I'm flying into New York International Airport at such and such a time, come get me. I went and I got him and that was the start of the biggest change that we needed to go through. He came to our house and I said,

Why are you here? And he said, God sent me here. I said, of all people, you, you're the only person in our lives that didn't champion our marriage. You're the only one that ever told me that maybe he's not the right person for me. Why you? He said, Gia, I don't know. I've been praying since I got off the phone with you after that terrible thing happened And I walked into my boss's office told him I had to take a leave of absence Went home packed a bag and got on a plane and headed here and it's only through the assignment of God God spoke to me Hmm. I said, so what does that mean? Like are you hearing voices like what does that mean? Like, are you hearing voices? Like, what do you mean God spoke to you?

And he said to me, when God speaks to you, it's as though he puts an overwhelming feeling on your heart. And when he tells you to do something, you don't ask any questions, you just do it. I said, okay, well, basically I'm gonna have to wrap my mind around that because I didn't have the tools to really understand that.

And he stayed with us for about maybe 10, 12 days, and he taught us a lot about God and faith and spirituality and what his assignment was. And he brought in his pastor, her name was Sister Nancy. She had the same feedback from God when she prayed. And this was all new to me. And I was actually very angry because now I have people in my life that I respect and love that are telling me that I have to stay in a relationship that I'm adamant

on getting out of and it was very very heavy I can't describe to you how heavy it was and how insistent he was in his assurance of what God communicated to him and the fast forward Ty Tyrese, same thing. I didn't know, you know, we knew Tyrese coming up here doing interviews, but I didn't know Tyrese didn't have his number. You know, he didn't have a new song. But when he heard me on the radio that day, he called and wanted to speak to Gia. And you can read it in the book because he got us together.

But he said the exact same thing, like Tyrese and Rasheed was speaking to each other. And it was kind of like those two were the ones to really save my marriage. And they didn't know each other. And Gia, you had asked for a sign. Well, that was the thing, because I was so angered by what I was hearing, like, oh, I was a victim being cheated on. Now, I'm being victimized again by God, telling me that I have to stay in a relationship, that I'm adamant about leaving, I don't understand this.

And I was, and I'm not a big crier, but one day I was taking a shower and I began to cry. And I began to pray in the way that I was learning how to pray and I asked God for a sign that I can interpret for myself. So at least it would feel as though I was making my own decision and a decision wasn't being made for me so I damn near begged for a sign and then shortly after Tyrese called Rashaun and Asked for him to set something up and we went to Philippe Chow's he came in with a backup singer and a guitarist

He performed stay just for Rashaun and I then he sat down for about four hours and we had a conversation. And he tried to explain to me how a man can love you and still cheat at the same time. Cause I didn't really understand that. But at the end of the conversation, I asked him, I said, you know, why are you here? You didn't, you don't even know if I'm a good person. You don't know if this relationship is even worth salvaging.

Why would you do that? You didn't know, Rashaun. You have no dog in this fight. You have nothing to gain or lose. You're supposed to be at a wedding somewhere else. You changed your flights to be here. Why? He said, God sent me here to do this.

Damn. I said, what do you mean God sent you here to do this? He said, God sent me here. I said, are you hearing voices? He said, no. And then he reiterated verbatim exactly what Rasheed said to me in my kitchen that day. And I had to ask Tyrese, I said, is that like in the Bible? Is that what you just said? Is that like a thing that people know? And he said, no, I'm just telling you how I feel. Like, what do you mean? At that moment, I just like threw my hands up and I said, no, I'm just telling you how I feel. Like, what do you mean? And at that moment, I just like threw my hands up

and I said, okay. And I looked at Rashaun and I said, I forgive you. I don't know what that means. I will work on this with you. I don't know how long that will take. I will do what I'm now believing is required of me, but we're gonna be in for a ride because I'm not really there but I can commit to you in this moment because there is not that

much coincidence in the world for what just happened. Thank you God. Yes. I'm sorry Gia. I'm sorry to my wife too. I just feel like apologizing. This is a trigger of conversation. I just feel like apologizing.

I'm sorry to all women and women. What did your mom say being that your mom was so strong and you knew you know initially I'm sorry to all women. What did your mom say being that your mom was so strong and you knew, you know, initially what you had to do and your families were so intertwined. So during this time, was she supportive and wanting y'all to get back together or was she like, yeah, you got to go? It's funny. Rashawn and I have a podcast called the Casey Crew and I did an all girls

podcast as a book review last week and I shared something during that podcast that I don't know if I've even ever told Rashaun. It's a very, very private and personal thought but I'll share it now since you're asking. My mother passed away in May and she suffered from dementia for about maybe 14 years. So when this all happened, she had dementia. If my mother didn't have dementia, Rashaun and I wouldn't be married today. Wow.

Because there would have been no way God, no God, that I could have gone to my mother and told her what happened and told her that I was staying. It could not have happened, it would not have happened. God literally would have had to have appeared in front of me and my mother and convinced both of us because I wasn't raised that way. So what's personal about this is to me is that I believe that whatever Rashaun and I have to accomplish either through our marriage or through our children is so great that I think my mother was a casualty of that. I think that God took my mother's sensibilities away from her so that I wouldn't

be in a position where I had to make that decision. I just think that what we have to accomplish is so great. And maybe one of those things is this this book because I think that our book will help a multitude of couples. And I think that there are things in there that can be life changing for people. Yeah, go get the book, Real Life, Real Love. But I wanna talk about something positive because you said something, women have intuition.

You said you had no cluedo, right? No, no. But how do you know when he's right? Because I think that's something we don't talk about enough. I think women know when their man is no longer really out there in the streets, when he's actually changed. How did you know he had actually changed? Hmm, that's a good question.

I didn't, because there was no, aside from his over commitment to me after the fact, there was no change. He was wonderful then. I had faith in God and a lot of people, I'll phrase the question a little bit differently the way that people ask me, how do you know that he'll never cheat again? Mm-hmm, and I tell them because once Rushy rushy started something we carried that torch now. We're very spiritual together we pray together every morning before he leaves to come here and

We have an individual relationship with God, each of us. So if he cheats, he doesn't have to worry about me. He has to worry about God. He has bigger fish to fry than me. So when people ask me, you know, what's the best relationship advice that you can give me for my marriage? And it honestly is to keep God at the pinnacle of your marriage. Be, honor Him. Keep your faith in Him.

Be a child of Him, because when you do that, that is what's going to guide you to be a good person, to be honest, to be committed and faithful. It's to Him. Don't be loyal to another human. Be led by goodness, because in that goodness you will do right by your spouse. And that's how I feel. And that's how I knew. That's how I knew.

Envy, let me ask you, because you know, for women we always are like, and like you said, Tyrese was having a conversation how a man can't cheat on you but still love you. Yeah. But why? Like, you know, that's something that for women we always want to know. And I'm sure you had so many conversations. I still don't like his answer. I don't necessarily agree with what Tyree said.

I really feel that until you know the definition of what love really means, I think a lot of times people just say, I love you. And it's, oh, I love you. But until you- Hey y'all. I'm Dr. Joy Harden Bradford, host of therapy for black girls. And I'm thrilled to invite you to our January Jumpstart series for the third

year running all January. I'll be joined by inspiring guests who will help you kickstart your personal growth with actionable ideas and real conversations. We're talking about topics like building community and creating an inner and outer glow. I always tell people that when you buy a handbag it doesn't cover a childhood scar. You know, when you buy a jacket it doesn't reaffirm what you love about the hair you were told not to love. So when I think about beauty it's so emotional because it starts to go back into the archives of

who we were, how we want to see ourselves, and who we know ourselves to be and who we can be. So a little bit of past, present and future all in one idea, soothing something from the past. And it doesn't have to be always an insecurity. It can be something that you love. All to help you start 2025 feeling empowered and ready. Listen to Therapy for Black Girls starting on January 1st on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts. So y'all, this is Questlove, and I'm here to tell you about a new

podcast I've been working on with the Story Pirates and John Glickman called Historical Records. It's a family friendly podcast. Yeah, you heard that right. A podcast for all ages. One you can listen to and enjoy with your kids starting on September 27th. I'm gonna toss it over to the host of Historical Records,

Nimini, to tell you all about it. Make sure you check it out. Hey, y'all, Nimini here. I'm the host of a brand new history podcast for kids and families called Historical Records. Historical Records brings history to life through hip hop. Flash slam, another one gone. Bash bam, another one gone.

The cracker, the bat, and another one gone. A tip, but a cap, there's another one gone. Each episode is about a different, inspiring figure from history. Like this one about Claudette Colvin, a 15 year old girl in Alabama who refused to give up her seat on the city bus nine whole months before Rosa Parks

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in order to make history, you have to make some noise. Listen to Historical Records on the iHeartRadio app, Apple podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Hi, I'm Dani Shapiro, host of the hit podcast, Family Secrets. How would you feel if when you met your biological father for the first time, he didn't even say hello? And how would you feel if your doctor advised you to keep your life-altering medical procedure a secret from everyone?

And what if your past itself was a secret and the time had suddenly come to share that past with your child. These are just a few of the powerful and profound questions we'll be asking on our eleventh season of Family Secrets. Some of you have been with us since season one and others are just tuning in. Whatever the case and wherever you are, thank you for being part of our Family Secrets family where every week we explore the secrets that are kept from us, the secrets we keep from others, and the secrets we keep from ourselves.

Listen to Season 11 of Family Secrets on the iHeartRadio app, Apple podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. The forces shaping markets and the economy are often hiding behind a blur of numbers. So that's why we created The Big Take from Bloomberg podcasts, to give you the context you need to make sense of it all. Every day in just 15 minutes, we dive into one global business story that matters. You'll hear from Bloomberg journalists like Matt Levine.

A lot of this Boomstock stuff is, I think, embarrassing to the SEC. Amanda Moll, who writes our Business Week Buying Power column. Very few, who writes our Business Week buying power column. Very few companies who go viral are like totally prepared for what that means. And Zoe Tillman, senior legal reporter. Courts are not supposed to decide elections. Courts are not really supposed to play a big role in choosing our elected leaders.

It's for the voters to decide. Follow The Big Take podcast on the iHeart Radio app, Apple podcasts, or wherever you listen. Hey everyone, I'm Madison Packer, a pro hockey veteran going on my 10th season in New York. And I'm Anya Packer, a former pro hockey player and now a full Madison Packer stan. Anya and I met through hockey and now we're married

and moms to two awesome toddlers. And on our new podcast, Moms Who Puck, we're opening up about the chaos of our daily lives between the juggle of being athletes, raising children, and all the messiness in between. We're also turning to fellow athletes and beyond to learn about their parenthood journeys and collect valuable advice,

like FIFA World Cup winner Ashlyn Harris. I wish my village would have prepared me for how hard motherhood was going to be. And Peloton instructor and Ratchet Mom Club founder, Kirsten Ferguson. And I remember going in there hot mess. So listen to Moms Who Puck, a production of iHeart Women's Sports and Deep Blue Sports and Entertainment on the iHeart Radio app,, Apple podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Presented by Capital One, founding partner of I Heart Women's Sports. To stand the definition of what love means, then you realize, if I love somebody, like

I say, you don't want to hurt them. You don't want to cheat on them. You don't want to disrespect them. You don't want to have them looking crazy because you love that person. And I don't think I knew the definition of love. When I figured that definition out of what love is and what Gia meant to me, you know, you realize I don't want to hurt her. I don't want to see her cry. I don't want to see her feel the way. I don't want to disrespect her. I don't want to be controlling. I don't want to be any of those things and when

you realize what that definition is, your outlook of life changes. I agree with Envy and I'll add on because I've explored this in therapy. When you say you can cheat and still love a person You might but you don't really love yourself. Yeah, I think a lot of times I'm not a lot of time all the time men cheat for ego. Oh, yeah, that's it It's wounded ego is something that we're lacking. It has nothing to do with our wives doesn't do it our girlfriends It's something that we feel like we're lacking for whatever reason and And that's what we go and do. It's literally just to feed our ego. Nothing more, nothing less.

You think women cheat for the same reason as men, or you think it's different? Like, when women cheat, you think they cheat for different reasons? I think women also cheat for ego. Who doesn't like to have the attention of the opposite sex? You know, especially when you are at a deficit and you do have holes and you need those holes filled. And most people have slight holes. You know, not that you're out there thirsty

for the attention of the opposite sex, but even if it's of the same sex, when someone pays you a compliment, like it's nice to be wanted is essentially what I'm saying. So for women Yeah, I mean I think that if you're with someone and you cheat I think a big part of it is ego But then you know you'll have people that say that they cheat because the person at home is in doing what they're supposed to do

You know and we have a son Logan. He's 18 So he's starting to date seriously and whatnot now and I had a conversation with him the other day. I said listen I said listen if You commit to a girl and you make her your girlfriend One thing I do not want you to do is She do not come to me and tell me that you guys broke up because you cheated on her because I've raised you Better than that if you decide that you want something else, or she's not satisfying whatever needs you have,

break up with her and move on to the next. And if within a week, you feel the same way about that girl, break up with her and move on to the next. Do not cheat because you're sacrificing your own integrity when you do that. And that's pretty much a sign of really not loving yourself. When you love yourself, you want to be self-actualized. You want to be your best self. You want to reach your

highest potential. You want to be a kind, a good person and you owe that to yourself. You don't necessarily owe it to the other person. You owe it to yourself to do those things and that's what I'm trying to instill in him as my oldest male child. You know? Logan, you're going to be breaking up with a lot of girls. I'm just curious. When the cheating happened? Yeah, like, you know, when people were thinking maybe,

you know, it might be back on the market. I wasn't on Instagram at the time. I didn't even know how to operate Instagram. I've never been on Facebook. I've never been on Twitter. So... Gia has no social media. She has no Twitter, no Facebook, no BlackSquare, no MySpace. Well, now I have Instagram. But at the time, which is probably why he was able to accomplish what he accomplished and all of his deceit. But... He's like, it's not funny. The book is more about cheating, guys.

Can we get, I mean. It's a very triggering conversation. It is very triggering. No, it really is. Because I've heard all of this before. Oh, have you really? Yeah. Yeah.

Mm-hmm. It's like, it's not this, it's, nevermind. I don't even wanna talk about it. But you're right, it is about a lot more than that. And we got to see early on things that you guys had to work on within yourselves. For you, MB, when did you get over being so possessive? Because there's one thing about being protective, but then it crosses the line when it's overly done and it feels like you were very jealous and possessive and insecure.

How did you manage to cope and overcome that? Well it happened because I was DJ Shrimp at first. I was five foot four, I had glasses, I had braces, I had acne, I wasn't running around, you know, Gia hates when I say this, but like my mom would say, I wasn't the cat's meow. Like I wasn't hollering at nobody. Nobody was hollering at me. The cat's meow. That's what my mom would say. So you were doing charity and Gia hates when I say this, but like my mom would say, I wasn't the cat's meow. Like nobody was, I wasn't hollering at nobody. Nobody was hollering at me.

That's what my mom would say. So you were doing charity, Gia. Yeah, that's why I'm always like. Who does the Gia? I thought that he was very cute and like I said earlier, charismatic. He was like a fixer-upper. Oh my goodness.

Fixer-upper. He was your first renovation. That's what we got in Tareel Estate. It was a f***ing real. We got to take your balls down. I was very insecure. So when she would go out I would always think damn she's going to find somebody that's smarter, that looks better, that does this, that does that. So I was always insecure. So I never wanted her to go out.

If she did go out I never wanted her to wear anything sexy. I kind of wanted to control it so I was always insecure so I never wanted her to go out if she did go out I never wanted her to wear anything sexy I kind of wanted to control it so I was always fearful that she would find somebody else and I think what changed me I think she did you know basically say that you know I was worthy that you know she wasn't gonna leave me for somebody else and it was just conversations it was my own insecurity that was affecting and hurting our relationship at the time. As you got older, you think it was guilty conscience too?

Cause you knew what you was doing and you might've been projecting on her, thinking she might've been doing the same thing? No, he had been like that since the very, very beginning. It was insecurity. And then you gotta think she was beautiful. So she had all these different celebs and all these different people hollering at her So, you know, she would come back and tell me like, you know one time

I don't know if we put this in the book, but somebody gave you Water watch at the mall and gave it to her. Yeah, I mean, I'm like while I was shopping He liked me. I did what any odd guy would do I put it under the truck and ran it over seven times Damn, Envy! He sure did. I couldn't even give it to his mother or my mother Like I understood that he didn't want me to wear it and the person didn't give it to me directly I was shopping and I was looking at Movado watches at the time and he hollered and I turned him down Then when I left he went and asked the salesperson. What was she looking at? What was she interested in?

Wow, and he bought me an Esperanza, a Movado Esperanza. Okay, that's nice. He was in college. Yeah, he was a little bit older though. He was clearly like in his 20s or something. Yeah, because he wasn't buying Movados in college. Yeah, and he took the box and the bag and wrote a note and put it on my car. So he had seen, obviously he had seen me come from the parking lot.

And then it was- What a thoughtful drug dealer you were. What a thoughtful drug dealer you were. So, um, so I didn't, I wouldn't have accepted it from him if he tried to give it to me. It was on my car. So I brought it home. I was like, Oh my God, guess what happened? Like I told him the story. Rashawn was irate and literally put it behind his back wheel and ran it over and then put the car in drive, ran it over again, back in reverse. I'm talking about King. You could have donated that watch.

I was like, we could have given it to somebody. It could have been gifted. Oh, the Envy now would have sold it. The Envy now would have sold it. He would have clipped that watch. Yes, look, there was also an instance where he caught you in the club grinding on somebody. Can we talk about the good stuff?

The nice stuff? Like, gosh, why? This is funny to me, because Envy is like, you know, he acts really different here than, like. Does he? I'm changed, I'm evolved. I would not. You don't get any doses of his crazy though?

What? Well, he's. Who have you been working with the past 12 years? But you know what it is? What are you talking about? Envy is petty, Envy is petty. He's petty. But I don't.

Don't cross him. Like certain things that he does, I'm like, envy was out of his mind. Well, that night, we were in college and he had a party at Virginia State. Now, Rashawn saw to it that every single and I mean every 100% of the parties that he did while we were in college, he made sure that I was at every single party with him. I was in the DJ booth. I was not allowed to leave the DJ booth.

If I wanted an Amaretto Sour from the bar, he would send little Sean, who is our friend, to the bar to get it for me. Wow. Tell your little Sean story. That has nothing to do with this. We're talking about your book, okay? Real life, real love.

All right? And if I tried to break out of the DJ booth when he wasn't looking, then I would always have two of his friends escorting me to make sure that no one kicked it to me. Like, let me out of this cage. Yes. So it would be me, every time we hung out, be me and like seven to eight dudes. I was always just like the homie. I was always there.

And this one night he had a party at Virginia State and I couldn't fit in the car because he was bringing his friends for security and whatnot. And that night there was a party at the armory. I was like, okay, I'm going to the party at the armory. He was like, no, you're not. I was like, oh, yes I am. Turned into a big argument. I was like, all right, well, I'll just tell you

that I'm not and go anyway. So that's what I did. He's on his way. I'm at the party, I'm dancing with a dude. Little Sean is at the armory too. He sees him, he calls Rashaun. Rashaun buses a Uee, and now you know how important this is to him,

because there's nothing that he loves more besides me than making some money. We know that. He forfeited that money, made a U-turn, came back. I'm dancing with the kid. I look up, I see Rashaun charging towards me. The fear of God came over me. And it was as though I felt like my life flashed before me.

Like I felt whatever that hormone is, I felt it rush through my body and he came, he grabbed me. He threw me over his shoulder, caveman style, and then rushed me to like the other side of the of the dance hall this is next level like this is a stereotypical light-skinned nigga shit yeah I mean and then we had a conversation where you know he made me very well aware how disappointed he was how hurt he was to see me I guess just with someone else touching me. You didn't realize that while you were over here showing them?

You didn't realize how hurt you was to... I'm glad we could laugh about this man. Thank God, right? You know how you met Little Sean? No, how? When he first moved to Jersey, he moved in Little Sean. I don't think we should tell this story because this makes you sound even more horrible. I don't think you should tell this story, is that right?

That's gonna be on the chopping block. I mean we could if you want to. Not now I wanna know. Well I moved into an apartment complex. And the woman at the apartment complex said, I think you should, you know, watch Envy. And I said, what do you mean watch Envy? Like I think you should, you know, just be careful around Envy.

I'm like, alright, I'm thinking she's about to tell me like, oh he's a grimy dude, he's a snake, whatever. She was like, cause you know, he's got around Envy. I'm like, all right, I'm thinking she's about to tell me like, oh, he's a grimy dude, he's snake whatever. She was like, because you know, he's got a boyfriend in this building. I know what building you moved into. Okay, yes, yes. He's like, he's got a boyfriend in this building. He looks like you, you're like the same height. Wow.

And he's sitting, you broke out ball heads. You all got the same complexion. And I'm like, what? And she was like, I mean, I just see him come over here and then you just hear moaning, moaning, moaning. I'm like, oh. you just hear moaning moaning There was no morning This is Sean and and for a long time they thought that me and Sean I guess we're gay lovers

Look at how rumors get started boy You and Sean. We weren't moaning. What's wrong with you? You told us it was a girl. I wasn't moaning. Oh my God, man. Uh-huh. Okay. Whatever. That's the positive in the book that you read. There's a lot in there that's positive, man. I know. Listen, the positive thing is that you guys are still together.

This is a very triggering combo. And that sometimes, you know, to get to the positivity, you got to go through a lot of ugliness. But that's the thing, right? I already know that it's going to be a lot of judgment. You know what I'm saying? If you like, Oh, how could you stay through that? And then they're going to try to paint interview to be some controlling, abusive person, but y'all were young.

Like people don't factor that in. Well, let's just clarify, you know, when we use the word abusive, because I have you word, right? And abuse comes in all different forms. I understand what you're saying, but he was never Physically abusive and I've never been scared of him I just knew that his controlling nature was rooted in his insecurity and I felt as though I could

Show him enough love that he would eventually get to a point where he would feel secure and understand that he's worthy of all of the love that I give him. That's right. You know what I mean? Because it took convincing and I literally had to convince, like I am, I'm not leaving, like I'm not going anywhere. I am thrilled to be with you.

I am happy that we're in college. We plan on getting married, starting a family, but he wouldn't let go of it. One of the biggest things I think that came out of this was all the work that he did do on himself, and he was suicidal at a point, we know that, right? Yes. I don't think that was all because of what was going on

with you, I think it was, like I said, it was other things that he was dealing with inside of him that probably got him to that point. Yes, we would have to ask him, because we've never had a conversation of it being about anything besides the threat of losing our relationship. I would say this, I would say,

I used to look at people who committed suicide as soft and suck it. That's what society made you think Until I got into that predicament where I felt like my life well, everybody's life around me would be better if I wasn't here and I couldn't shake it and Majority of it was losing my wife losing my family losing the the thing that I knew and that I loved and I really feel like I didn't want to be there and the thing that I knew and that I loved. And I really feel like I didn't wanna be there.

And I guess it was everything else that we said, like the insecurities that made me do it, the insecurities around me. And I just didn't know who I was as a person. Ooh, that's powerful. That's the biggest part. But I will say during all of that, in all those conversations and all those late night talks

and with praying, you realize who you are as a person. And once you figure that out, you figure out who you wanna be, who you wanna live like, and you don't care about anything else. At one time I used to care what people thought. Now I don't care. As long as my wife and my family's happy,

everything else is just white noise behind it. Just think about how much stronger you guys are as individuals and your marriage is so much stronger after everything you've been through. Oh yeah, oh yeah, yeah. Let me say something powerful too because this business, this business will have you living a lie because we're characters, right? So we create these characters that kind of protect the Rashaan and protect the Lennard and we're go, we go home and we one way but then we out in the street being another way but you can't do both. Eventually that negative is going to catch up.

Yeah. So that's why I think he was going through, like not only just the threat of losing you, but just like, who am I? Was that hard for you? Having this dual personality almost? Absolutely, because I mean, like nothing's better now than to not care what people think.

You know, I would have to think about it. It's freedom. It's freedom. I would have to think about what I was saying on the radio and how would affect me how people would look at me I would have to think about this or think about that instead of just being free and say hey It is what it is take it how you like it If you like me you like me if you love me you love me if you hate me you hate me And once I got to that that place life became a whole lot better

So to his question was there anything aside the law the threat of the loss of the relationship that made you feel as though that was why you were occupying that mental space? I think it was a little bit of everything I think it was the insecurities of not being free I think it was the fact that I was losing my best friend I think it was the fact that I feel like I disappointed my best friend. I think it was the fact that I feel like I disappointed my best friend, disappointed my family, disappointed my kids.

I think it had a lot to do with all of that. And I think wearing that mask too. I think a lot of times what we really wanna kill is our ego. We don't necessarily know how to do that if we weren't doing the work. I wasn't doing the work then. It's when I started going to therapy and everything else

that I learned how to kill the ego. Before you learn how to kill the ego, only thing you think is, like he said, I don't need to be here. But else and I learned how to kill the ego before you learn how to kill the Eagle only thing you think is why he said I don't I don't I don't need to be here But you said that you wanted to kill the ego Did you actually want to before you went to therapy and realize that you should kill the ego you enjoyed the ego? Yeah, I didn't know what it was. Yeah. Yeah, I didn't even know that's what I was projecting I didn't even know that's what I was leading with was ego. I didn't even know that till I sat down with it like oh Okay, I get it now. Yeah.

When everything happened and came to the surface, it was like a ton of bricks fell out of the sky and hit me on the head. It was like, wow, he really is damn near two people. Like he's Rashaun, husband and father in this house, and he gets tens across the board for that. But when he leaves there's an ego, there's a bravado, there's a whole persona separate and apart from what I experience in this house. And I've been out with him and whatnot but this was at a time when

things were starting to shift. This was, you know, we just got married and we have two beautiful children and now I'm not going to the clubs with him because even though he would want me to and he would want me to travel, I have two kids at home to raise and I wanted to give them all of my free time attention and then his celebrity started to grow. You know, he became more successful and his dreams became realized and he went off, I realized later, in that direction, enjoying that and then also enjoying have the faithful loving wife and children at home. So it was the pretty much the definition of having your cake and eating it too. And it's

probably also difficult you guys got together so young you know 16 experience other Relationships really so let me tell you when I found out Angela I Knew that I didn't want him to be my husband anymore, but I Understood how it happened I understood how it happened. Because we were together, like he said, since we were 15 and 16. He was my first and only everything. The furthest I've ever gotten before him was second base,

which is letting a boy go up your shirt, right? Damn, we've been to second base, King. I'm just trying to find the funny thing. I'm just joking. That's what they call it. We've been to second base King You haven't exposed them to your nips No, no, no, no. Hey, we definitely go to second base, but I'm easy to hope. We go there. Yeah, yeah, we did that. We did that. I'm easy to hope.

I'm easy to hope we go to second base. Goodness gracious. I feel like y'all went to third. But that was the farthest that I had ever been. So, and he was like virgin-ish. What's that mean? He was in a relationship with his first, like, girlfriend. I think they were together for maybe three months.

And if I'm telling it right, they started but never finished. So he was, like, virgin-ish. He tried and he couldn't handle it. No, that's not what I said. I was a turtle. I was slow. I was scared. OK.

You gotta explain that to me, Kim. I'm just over here, you know. I was scared. Okay. Yeah. You gotta explain nothing to me, King. I'm just over here, you know. I was a turtle. You were a turtle because I was so slow. I wasn't... And it was nice because... When people called you turtle? Yeah, I mean, that was my nickname, turtle.

Oh, wait. Let me write this down. I don't want to forget that. Oh, my goodness. Shrimp, turtle, go ahead. And it was good. I was a turtle, too. You know, I lost my virginity to him on our one-year anniversary, and he made it very sweet and special,

and it was really nice. But, what were we saying? I was talking about you guys were so young, so you had never experienced. Oh yeah, so I understood because it was like, he was so inexperienced. We were in high school together every day, we were in college together every day.

Then as soon as we graduate, we get married, we have children, and then he's on a path towards his career. And he's out of the house and he's traveling. And now he's around celebrities and being influenced by our hip hop culture, which glorifies having groupies and cheating and always having women around you and being in the club. At that time, you didn't see your favorite celebrity showcasing their wife or their family

or speaking on the importance of family the way that you guys do on this platform. And doing that changes lives. I'm sure that you know that. And we were taught to hide them. And you were taught to hide them. And you were taught to hide them. Don't tell people you got a girlfriend. Don't tell people you've been in a long-term relationship. Like they would say that. Absolutely. Even you know young people now on Instagram they have the same thing. It's like oh I'm gonna pretend or I'm gonna

I'm not gonna post I love you to death I'm not gonna post you because you know I'm trying to do this business and it seems like I have a girlfriend then it's not gonna be successful. It's that mentality. So all of these things contributed to him being put in a position where cheating might have seemed like the route that he wanted to go. And when we talked about it, I understood because we've been together so long and I know him so well.

I love him not necessarily just as like my husband. I love him like he's my brother too. Do you know what I mean? And if it were your brother that got caught cheating and he came home and told you like, Angela, you know, I just got caught. She found out. What would be your knee jerk intuition to do?

I cover for him. Exactly. That's the point. Like you wanna help. You wanna be like, well, now this is what you need to do? I cover for him. Exactly. That's the point. Like you want to help. You want to be like, well, now this is what you need to do. You need to go apologize. You need to do this. Start helping them pull those tricks out of the hat. You know, you get protective. So even when he told me, I got protective in a sense and I wanted to understand why he did it. Now while at the same time not wanting to be with him, as his wife, I was devastated, but as his friend,

I understood how he was in a place where that happened. See, a lot of gems in this book, you guys. I was thoroughly entertained, and like I said, I went through. You look stressed. I'm good. I felt he's been nervous all morning before you got here. I was not nervous all morning. It's a triggering conversation.

Yes, it is. If you've ever been a man in that situation and you've caused that kind of harm to your wife and your family, it's very true. But I feel like for him, it shouldn't be anymore because I'm not affected by it. Not, but every time it comes up, you realize how much I hurt you and how much I hurt our family. Like, writing that book was real difficult because we had to go through early stages of insecurities and things that you know we laugh at now but back then you'd be like gosh what was wrong with me?

And do you also, exactly, and do you realize how much how disappointed you are in yourself? That question you asked, what the fuck was wrong with me? But then I also think you know we got daughters, but like if my daughter brought a guy home like me? What? Like I wouldn't want my daughter to date a guy like me back then. Hell no. Now I'm a totally changed person, different person. Mind frames on a wholly different thing. But back then, I wouldn't want that.

That's just for my daughter. And you know what's nice for our older two children, they were maybe eight and 10 when this happened, so they're well aware of what happened. So it's nice for them to be able to see that something completely devastating can happen and you can survive it if you go about it the right way. If you understand the definition of love, you understand the definition of forgiveness,

you work at it, you have that until mind frame, you don't act like you're too good to do those things until and now they get to enjoy the beauty and the magic of our family. And our house is really magical. And that's why, you know, when we were coming up with the title of the book, I told our I told Abrams like that has to be in the title because I honestly feel like our house is magical. Like you come into our house and it's just filled with so much love, fun, and happiness all the time.

It's always jokes, it's always roasting. Rashaun and I play fight a lot. We joke with our kids, like our kids come in and they talk to us for hours. They tell us everything. Madison, who's now out of the house, and she goes to NYU, she's a sophomore, she calls and FaceTimes me seven, eight times a day.

You know, like it's just this tight unit of a family, and they get to see that, but for forgiveness, but for perseverance, but most importantly. Stop saying but, you're turning them on. But for God, but for God, none of this would have been possible. So there's lessons in it for our children specifically to live out what you preach. Well, I'm glad you're in this space.

But you're Logan like, shit, I ain't no turp. Because it probably would have been weird. You know, we came home with without underwear one day, right? Did you pee yourself out in public? It was worse than that. I shot myself a pill one day. Yeah. Oh!

Do you notice that? I remember when that happened. Oh wait, wait. So wait, tie that in? He had to throw his underwear away. And I'm like, any other time you might've been like, why doesn't my husband have on underwear? When he comes home.

Did Janita find that? Did Janita say, I don't know what's going on in that studio? But there's some strange stuff going on in that studio. My goodness. The book is out today. Go get it, man. Make sure you pick it up. Real life, real love.

Get it today. Life lessons on joy, pain, and the magic that holds us together. That's right. Amazon, Barnes and Nobles, wherever you buy books, your local bookstores, please pick it up today. April 19th. Yes, and when you do read it, or you read it, please, what we want you to do is we want you to tell us what you think about the book.

Whether it's a 30-second video tag here and now, we want to repost it. Whether you love it, whether you hate it, we're going to repost all of them, because we'd love to get you guys' feedback. Yeah, and I think that y'all are going to help a lot of couples, and it's clear that y'all too are meant to be with each other. You know what I'm saying? But not all of y'all out there. Some of y'all gonna have to leave the person that you're with when they get caught up in these situations, but y'all are different. We did the work.

Yeah, because a lot of people aren't willing to do the work. A lot of people don't have that until in mind. Until, that's very important, until. It's just until dot dot dot. You know, and there's also a list in the book. One of my favorite chapters is called The New Deal, and it's pretty much about reparations that the offender has to make after offending their partner.

And it's those things that will help to signal to your partner that you just may be worthy of forgiveness and being extended grace. So what are those reparations? The first thing people will say is, oh, that's why he does the 12 days of Christmas. You know, that's right. A lot of people do say that.

You know, we did that before. But you know what's funny? And that's the funny thing. We've always done 12 days of Christmas. We just never made it public. And it's not the type of thing that at first I ever wanted to make public because it is grand. But I decided to start posting it because it's not about the material items that he

gives me for Christmas. It's about the intention behind it. It's about the thought, you know, he starts shopping almost a year in advance for that. And every gift comes with something special. A little note, a little treasure hunt to find the gift, a prayer, a poem, something that is giving of his heart, not giving of his pocket. And that's why when you read the book and you hear y'all talk, that's why you understand why he got so upset at Deezus and Mero. That's correct.

You know what I'm saying? Because y'all relationship is so much deeper than that. Of course. You know, because with their comment, it almost to me suggests as though there's nothing else worthy about him that would signal me to stay aside from what he has to offer financially and it's a joke right but we all know that all jokes are rooted in some truth and that's what I think their truth was looking at it from an outsider I wasn't some Jackie completely and met somebody with money and was like, oh, come up. We ground it out from day one.

You know, I was always there and supporting him and loving him. And if he failed and wound up being a secretary or anything followed another path, I would still be there. Yeah. I think he'd be a proctologist. A proctologist? Ha ha ha! He does it on the side of the head.

It took a beat to get that? I'm just saying, I'm just saying, I just can't believe he's flirting with me with my wife here. I'm not, what are you talking about? I'm just suggesting other career options that you could have taken. I can't believe he's flirting with me with my wife here.

Like, you're disrespectful. Real life, real real love go get it Right, and I just want to say Charlemagne is not in chapter 69. He I'm on page 69 He's not on page 69 either right Charlemagne is not in it There's no love situation me and Charlemagne in the book alright It doesn't exist, but I we appreciate you for that you got to say that let's everybody know that it's in there Oh my goodness. We appreciate you for joining us this morning real life real thank you for having me guys that's right pick it up today and uh it's the Breakfast Club good morning no you got

to tell this guess I love you before you sign off yes Casey thank you for joining us I love you I love you too I love you way more in Charlamagne it's the Breakfast Club. Good morning. Hey, everyone. I'm Madison Packer, a pro hockey veteran going on my 10th season in New York City. I'm a professional hockey player. I'm a professional hockey player. I'm a professional hockey player. I'm a professional hockey player. I'm a professional hockey player. I'm a professional hockey player.

I'm a professional hockey player. I'm a professional hockey player. I'm a professional hockey player. I'm a professional hockey player. I'm a professional hockey player. I'm a professional hockey player. I'm a professional hockey player. I'm a professional hockey player.

I'm a professional hockey player. I'm a professional hockey player. I'm a professional hockey player. I'm a professional hockey player. I'm a professional hockey player. I'm a professional hockey player. I'm a professional hockey player. I'm Madison Packer, a pro hockey veteran going on my 10th season in New York. And I'm Anya Packer, a former pro hockey player and now a full Madison Packer stan. Anya and I met through hockey and now we're married and moms to two awesome toddlers, ages two and four. And we're excited about our new podcast, Moms Who Puck, which talks about everything from

pro hockey to professional women's athletes to raising children and all the messiness in between. So listen to Moms Who Puck on the iHeartRadio app, Apple podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Happy holidays from me, Michael Rappaport, and my gift to you is a free subscription to the I Am Rappaport Stereo Podcast, where I discuss entertainment, sports, politics, and anything and everything that catches my attention. I am here to call it as I see it, and there's a whole lot of things catching my eyes these

days. Listen to the I Am R Rapaport Stereo Podcast on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcast, and wherever you get your podcast. Hi, I'm Dani Shapiro, host of the hit podcast, Family Secrets. How would you feel if when you met your biological father for the first time, he didn't even say hello? And what if your past itself was a secret, and the time had suddenly come to share that past with your child These are just a few of the powerful and profound questions We'll be asking on our 11th season of Family Secrets

Listen to season 11 of Family Secrets on the iHeartRadio app, Apple podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts The forces shaping markets and the economy are often hiding behind a blur of numbers. So that's why we created The Big Take from Bloomberg podcasts to give you the context you need to make sense of it all. Every day in just 15 minutes, we dive into one global business story that matters. You'll hear from Bloomberg journalists like Matt Levine. A lot of this meme stock stuff is I think embarrassing to the SEC. Follow The Big Take podcast on the iHeartRadio app, Apple podcasts or wherever you listen. People, my people, what's up? This is Quetzalove. Man, I cannot believe we're already wrapping

up another season of Quetzalove Supreme. Man, we've got some amazing guests lined up to close out the season, but you know, I don't want any of you guys to miss all the incredible conversations we've had so far. I mean, we talked to A. Marie, Johnny Marr, Eve, Jonathan Schechter, Billy Porter, and so many more. Look, if you haven't heard these episodes yet, hey, now's your chance. You gotta check them out. Listen to Questlove Supreme on the iHeartRadio app,

Apple Podcast, or wherever you get your podcast. ["I'm On My Way To Heaven"]