The Breakfast Club - DONKEY: Dine & Dash Couple Charged After Racking Up $1200 In Free Meals

Episode Date: May 2, 2024

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It's time for Donkey of the Day. I'm not even trying to be Donkey of the Day no more. They should be embarrassed by what they already did. I'm not making these people do these things. I called Donkey of the Day and it really caught me off guard. Damn, Charlemagne, who got the Donkey of the Day today? Well, just hilarious. Donkey of the Day for Thursday, May 2nd, goes to Ann and Bernard McDonough.

Okay, they are 39 and 41 years old. And I am reluctantly giving them donkey of the day this morning because truthfully, this is one of the most romantic stories I have ever heard. See, when you're in a relationship, you are always looking for new things to do. Okay, new things to try with your significant other. You have to keep things interesting in the relationship. And these two absolutely did that. Let me read the headline for you. The headline is Dine and Dash Couple Busted for Hitting Five Restaurants for $1,200

in Free Meals. I repeat, Dine and Dash Couple Busted for Hitting Five Restaurants for $1,200 in Free Meals. See, what had happened was Ann and Bernard had been accused of dining at five different restaurants all within a 30-mile radius of each other and leaving without paying their tab. Before you ask, from the pictures I see, yes, they are big backs. Okay? Wide-bodied individuals,

alright? One of them so big that if she wore yellow, kids would run after her thinking they missed the school bus, respectfully. Okay? Now, these folks just weren't going to different restaurants, you know, to get an item here or there. You know, you may order some chicken from KFC, but then, you know, get your sides from Popeye's. No, these individuals who are so big they could sit on Wal-Mart and make the prices go down. We're eating full blown meals at these establishments. OK, this is the epitome of big back activity. See, God can't bless what you pretend to be,

so you need to be yourself. And if you are yourself, a blessing as big as Ann's back is on its way to you. Now, let's be clear. This is gluttony to the highest degree because the couple used to go to these restaurants and they would go with a party of six. They would order and eat large meals,

which often cost upward of $400. They would eat quickly. And then four members of the party would exit, leaving Ann behind. And Ann would be with a little small child, like a four-year-old child. They would leave Ann behind to pay the bill. Ann would act like she was paying the bill, okay, with a card. Then the card would get declined. Then she would say she needed to get another card from the car she'd walk to the car they'd ask the little boy to stay and wait for her in the restaurant and then when the woman would get to the car after about 10-15 seconds the little boy would run out to the car man the clumps is wild okay what i don't understand is if you can put

this much energy into a crime of food consumption, how come you can't put that same energy into un-bigging your back? And furthermore, if you can put this much energy into being a snack scammer, how come you can't put just as much energy into getting a job so you don't have to steal from people? Now, the owners of these restaurants would call police, but police would tell them this isn't an emergency and all they could do was report the incident. This is disgusting. You call the police to report a herd of humans coming into your establishment and stealing and nobody does anything. But imagine the urgency that would happen if they called and said their restaurant just got invaded by a herd of buffalo. Every single law enforcement division would show up and animal control

to get this herd of buffalo under control. So the same sense of urgency should be applied to a herd of humans who are as big as buffaloes. Now what's even sadder is an owner of the restaurant said they sent CCTV recordings, I guess those are the camera recordings from the restaurant, they would send the recordings from the restaurant, they would send photos,

they even sent the registration plate number of the car. And the response from law enforcement was, this vehicle is connected to many people. Well, go investigate all the many people then. Now, we can take that for what it is and say, hey, the vehicle is connected to many people. Or we can say one of these individuals is so big that they get mistaken for many. When 50 Cent said many men wish death

Upon him we knew that meant a lot So you know how big one person gotta be for you to refer to them as many? To be fair though the whole party not big backs Just like two of them and they white so they look like Twitter eggs from 2014 But let's think about the bright side of this. I know a good romantic comedy when I hear one. Just call Alvin Gray right now. Okay?

Call Alvin Gray. We about to go into production on Loving Big Backs coming to Tubi real soon. Opening scene. Opening scene. We going to show them getting baptized at SeaWorld. Oh, you know what, though? Hold on. Hold on.

Hold on. Wait a minute. I got a better name for this romantic comedy. We can change Anne's name to Stella and call it How Stella Got Her Big Back. That's it. That's it right there. Please, please give Anne and Bernard McDonagh the biggest hee-haw. And let's not forget what they did is wrong,

and that's why they were arrested and charged with five counts of fat fraud and charged with four counts of theft. Jesus. Well, rightfully so. They should have been. That's right. He said fat fraud. Yes, yo.

Jesus. I know they didn't put regular handcuffs on them either, but that's a whole different story. How Ann got her big back Yes We gotta change her name to Stella though We change her name to Stella for the movie How Stella got her big back

Oh my god What do we call Alvin Gray I'm gonna call him Although Alvin Gray Do have a movie called Check Please Where they run out on checks. No. But they got a big bag.

Yeah, he does, yo. My man is out here. Stop playing, man. I'm working for real. You got to watch it. It's another one. It's on Tubi? It's on Amazon Prime, YouTube, and Tubi.

Man, stop playing. It is, yo. For real, y'all. I don't believe nothing I say. For real, it's called Check, Please, and they do this movie about guys running out on the check. But it's called check please and they do that's the movie about uh guys running out on the check but it's funny it's like it's a it's a storyline behind and everything man you is not lying i just looked it up man man hold on man hold on alvin gray got the rapper who got shot in the hill the nurse that saw the baby on the highway, and check, please.

Oh, I gotta hold. Now, this one I got to watch. You got one called Blackwater Sasquatch. Oh, my God. That's the number one. No! That's the one. You gotta say Blackwater Sasquatch is really good. It's about Bigfoot? I ain't gonna tell you. What is going on here? Yeah, but it's good, though. It's black, though. It's like a black film.

I'm watching that. That's gonna get me to Tubi. I'm watching that today. And it's good, though. It's black, though. It's like a black film. I'm watching that. That's going to get me to Tubi. I'm watching that today. And it's free. Oh, my goodness. All right. Well, thank you for that donkey today. Now, don't try to do that because when your little documentary come out tomorrow, you're

going to want us to watch it. So don't try to do all that. DJ and DJ. Anyway, when we come back. Can we go? Can we pay some bills? All right. Let's go.

Let's go. All right. Donkey of the Day is sponsored by renowned personal injury attorney Michael the Bull Laminsoft. Don't be a donkey when you need a fighter on your side. If you're ever injured, go to MichaelTheBull.com. That's MichaelTheBull.com. And when you mess with the bull, you get the horns. Wake that ass up.

In the morning. The Breakfast Club.