The Breakfast Club - DONKEY: Florida Man Steals Dog Food From Gas Station & Leaves Debit Card Behind

Episode Date: February 9, 2023

Florida Man Steals Dog Food From Gas Station & Leaves Debit Card Behind See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Had enough of this country? Ever dreamt about starting your own? I planted the flag. This is mine. I own this. It's surprisingly easy. 55 gallons of water, 500 pounds of concrete. Or maybe not. No country willingly gives up their territory. Oh my God.

What is that? Bullets. Listen to Escape from Zakistan. We need help! That's Escape from Z-A-Q-istan on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Hey guys, I'm Kate Max. You might know me from my popular online series, The Running Interview Show, where I run with celebrities, athletes, entrepreneurs, and more. After those runs, the conversations keep going. That's what my podcast

Post Run High is all about. It's a chance to sit down with my guests and dive even deeper into their stories, their journeys, and the thoughts that arise once we've hit the pavement together. Listen to Post Run High on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. As a kid, I really do remember having these dreams and visions, but you just don't know what is going to come for you. Alicia shares her wisdom on growth, gratitude, and the power of love. I forgive myself. It's okay.

Have grace with yourself. You're trying your best. And you're going to figure out the rhythm of this thing. Alicia Keys, like you've never heard her before. Listen to On Purpose with Jay Shetty on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. It's Teresa, your resident ghost host. And do I have a treat for you. Haunting is crawling out from the shadows, and it's going to be devilishly good. We've got chills, thrills, and stories that'll make you wish the lights stayed on. So join me, won't you?

Let's dive into the eerie unknown together. Sleep tight, if you can. Listen to Haunting on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Jenny Garth, Jana Kramer, Amy Robach, and TJ Holmes bring you I Do Part Two, a one-of-a-kind experiment in podcasting to help you find love again. Hey, I'm Jana Kramer. I'm Jenny Garth. Hi, everyone. I'm Amy Robach. And I'm TJ Holmes. And we are, well, not necessarily relationship experts. If you're ready to dive back into the dating pool and find lasting love, we want to help. Listen to I Do Part 2 on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen to podcasts.

Make sure you tell them to watch out for Florida, man. The craziest people in America come from the Bronx and all of Florida. Make sure you tell them to watch out for Florida Man. The craziest people in America come from the Bronx and all of Florida. Yes, you are a donkey. A Florida man attacked an ATM for a very strange reason. It gave him too much money. Florida man is arrested after deputies say he rigged the door to his home in an attempt to electrocute his pregnant wife. Police arrested an Orlando man for attacking a flaming flamingo. The Breakfast Club, bitches. Donkey of the Day with Charlamagne Tha Guy. I don't know why y'all keep letting him get y'all like this. Yes, Donkey of the Day for Thursday, February 9th

goes to a Florida man named Lance Kurtz. What does your Uncle Charla always say about the great state of Florida? The craziest people in America come from the Bronx and all of Florida, and today is no exception, okay? Lance is 21 years old from Palm County Florida and he's getting donkier today today because he did something that I used to do when I was younger and that's steal from a gas station okay if you're from a certain environment or should I say certain economic background meaning you didn't grow up with much you done stole from a gas station okay the biggest thing I ever stole from a gas station was gas okay okay? Second was a 12-pack of Bud Ice, all right? Back in the 19-

Bud Ice? Bud Ice, man, back in the day. Bud Ice? I didn't have good taste back in the day. What about Thunderbird? Back in the 1900s and 90s when the Scotchman used to be on 17A in Moncks Corner, South Carolina when I was a little badass teenager, I just walked in the Scotchman, took a pack of Dutch Masters and a 12-pack of Bud Ice and just walked out. It happens, man. Okay,

I done stole Peanut M&M's, Source and Excel magazines. Couldn't steal comic books. They was too close to the register. But the moral of the story is folks done stole a lot of gas stations, okay? And Lance Kurtz of Palm County, Florida is carrying on tradition. The problem is folks in Florida don't move like the rest of us. All right? One thing about Florida is they going to Florida.

All right? See, when I stole a lot of gas stations, I did it when the store was open. I also did it because I didn't have any money. Lance Kurtz, well, he didn't do it like that, okay? He didn't do it like I did because he's from Florida. See, Lance decided to break into a gas station while it was closed. I repeat, this man broke into a gas station while it was closed, and guess what he stole? What?

Some damn dog food. Now, I know some people love their dogs. They really really do they got dog food at the gas station yes okay yeah so they're gonna they're gonna go all out for their dogs you know i mean if their dog is starving if their dog's ribs is touching they're gonna make moves they think are necessary to feed their dog okay but what happened in this situation was not only did he break into the gas station and steal dog food he got caught you know how he got caught let's listen to him tell the story it's broken with a knife through what the back door? yeah through the back door it's all on the security camera I'm sure

yeah we never watched it yeah what was your intention by leaving your card behind? so that I could come back later and pay for it. Just so they knew my name, you know? Just in case they got picked up. I didn't want to steal anything, you know? That's against the law. Yeah.

I don't know if they teach you guys that. He got caught because he left his debit card there. Oh, man. He got to remember to get that. He left his debit card there. Why did he take He got to remember to get that. He left his debit card there. Why'd he take it out? He was trying to pay for it. The store was closed.

It was closed. He broke into a closed store. Are you listening, Ray J? No, he's not. You know what he should have said? Well, I will in a minute. I just took my Uber. I'll give me five minutes.

What I'm saying is, what if he left his card to say, hey, I'm trying to pay for it. I'll be back later. Here's my card. That's exactly what he said. Play the clip again for Ray J. Pay attention in class, Willie Ray. I just took my earphone. I ain't kicked in yet.

Through what? The back door? Yeah, through the back door. It's all on the security camera, I'm sure. Yeah, we never watched it. Yeah. Yeah. What was your intention by leaving your card behind?

So that I could come back later and pay for it. That's a good guy just so they knew my name you know just in case i got picked up i didn't want to steal anything you know it's against the law yeah and he's a pet lover i don't know if they teach you guys that now we don't know if there's money on his debit card okay but that's not even the moral of the story the moral of the story is when you commit crimes the point or so i thought is to not get caught oh so he got the donkey for being honest he got the donkey for breaking into a store and leaving his debit card and getting caught if he was going to do all that just identify yourself my dog is sick and petco is closed my jesus i can't break in petco because

it's a bigger store you might as well call the police station and tell them to meet you wherever you're going to commit the crime. First, I got to go get my dog saved because he's hungry. And then anything after that, I feel like I'm a good Samaritan enough to go, hey, man, God got me. Do you know he told the police that stealing is against the law? And he looked the police dead in the eyes and said, I don't know if y'all know that. I don't know if they teach y'all that stealing is against the law. Clearly, this man is not of right mind. I felt that guy on man i did i really felt his soul well he was arrested and charged with armed burglary of a dwelling structure and petite theft and he was released on a ten thousand dollar bond

if your bond is ten thousand dollars that mean you at least got a thousand dollars ray okay so you got a thousand dollars to bail out of jail then you had a thousand dollars for dog food well maybe his mom has the the thousand dollars or his brothers or something that's going to bail him out. Or, as we know, cocaine, especially in Florida, is a hell of a drug. It is bad. You had some in Florida before? Huh? You had some in Florida?

We had some what? Cocaine. What? I don't do that kind of stuff. Oh, okay. I watch movies and it seems like they're enjoying themselves, but that's as far as I go. All right. Please give Lantkirch the sweet sounds of the Hamilton's, please.

Oh, now you are the donkey of the day. You are the donkey of the day. Yee-haw. All right. Who was that? That's the Hamilton's. Don't even think about it. They're Body Universes.

I've already been Body. Okay. I'm glad you know. I'm glad you know. I'm glad you know. No need to dig up that code. Speaking of getting Body, we got the new RSVP album coming and the new single coming. Tomorrow.

Even though I was Body, yep, tomorrow. We all became a group and we all understood each other. And they gave me a chance to get on songs with them. And it's explosive. What's the name of the record? Money Everywhere. You know we do a segment on the show on Friday called Pastor Ox. With DJ Nyla Simone.

I'm going to see if she's going to play that. You're going to have to convince her to do it. With Nyla. She don't be listening to this. She'll be up here tomorrow. Let me pitch it to her. Because by that time, I'll be ready and smart. I'm already calming down.

She plays her playlist. See if she'll add it to her playlist. You got to pitch her. Listen, I'm not the relief pitcher. I'm the closer. Hey! Okay. What if she does like 50 and goes in the bathroom and takes a dump? She would never do that.

I think that... I've been thinking about it and 50 didn't call me tripping, so I think everything's okay. All right. 50, he's waiting. Donkey of the Day is brought to you

by the law office of Michael S. Lamisoff. Don't be a donkey. Dial pound 250 on your cell and say the bull if you've been hurt in a construction accident. That's pound 250

from your cell and say the bull. Had enough of this country? Ever dreamt about starting your own? I planted the flag. This is mine. I own this. It's surprisingly easy. 55 gallons of water, 500 pounds of concrete. Or maybe not.

No country willingly gives up their territory. Oh my God. What is that? Bullets. Listen to Escape from Zakistan. That's Escape from Z-A-Q-istan on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Hey guys, I'm Kate Max. You might know me from my popular online series, The Running Interview Show, where I run with

celebrities, athletes, entrepreneurs, and more. After those runs, the conversations keep going. That's what my podcast, Post Run High, is all about. It's a chance to sit down with my guests and dive even deeper into their stories, their journeys, and the thoughts that arise once we've hit the pavement together. Listen to Post Run High on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. As a kid, I really do remember having these dreams and visions, but you just don't know what is going to come for you. Alicia shares her wisdom on growth, gratitude, and the power of love. I forgive myself. It's okay. Have grace with yourself. You're trying your best and you're going to figure out the rhythm of this thing. Alicia Keys, like you've

never heard her before. Listen to On Purpose with Jay Shetty on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. and stories that'll make you wish the lights stayed on. So join me, won't you? Let's dive into the eerie unknown together. Sleep tight, if you can. Listen to Haunting on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Hi, I'm Marie. And I'm Sydney.

And we're Mess. Well, not a mess, but on our podcast called Mess, we celebrate all things messy. But the gag is, not everything is a mess. Sometimes it's just living. Yeah, things like J-Lo on her third divorce. Living. Girl's trip to Miami. Mess.

Breaking up with your girlfriend while on Instagram Live. Living. It's kind of mess. Yeah. Well, you get it. Got it. It's kind of mess. Yeah. Well, you get it. Got it? Live, love, mess. Listen to Mess with Sydney Washington and Marie Faustin

on iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.