The Breakfast Club - DONKEY: Florida Woman Arrested For Attacking Daughter With Frozen Chicken

Episode Date: October 2, 2023

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The craziest people in America come from the Bronx and all of Florida. Yes, you are a donkey. A Florida man attacked an ATM for a very strange reason. It gave him too much money. Florida man is arrested after deputies say he rigged the door to his home in an attempt to electrocute his pregnant wife. Police arrested an Orlando man for attacking a flamingo. It's a breakfast club, bitches.

Donkey of the day with Charlemagne the guy. I don't know why y'all keep letting him get y'all like this. Well, Donkey of the Day for Monday, October 2nd goes to a 30-year-old Florida woman named Mary Marquardt. What does your Uncle Charla always tell you about the great state of Florida? The craziest people in America come from the Bronx and all of Florida. Now, Mary is facing a domestic battery charge after allegedly striking her daughter with a frozen chicken.

I can't make this kind of stuff up. Let's go to Today Plus News report, please. A 30-year-old woman has been arrested after allegedly attacking her daughter with a frozen chicken. Mary Marquardt, hailing from St. Petersburg, Florida, is facing charges of domestic battery for reportedly striking her daughter with the chilled poultry item. According to an arrest affidavit, the victim stated that Marquardt threw a frozen chicken at her, hitting her right leg. Marquardt's sister also witnessed the incident and confirmed that the defendant had thrown the bird, resulting in the victim being struck by the frozen chicken. The motive behind this unusual attack remains undisclosed in the affidavit.

As a result of the incident, Marquardt was arrested and charged with a misdemeanor count of domestic battery. She was able to post a $150 cash bond and was released from the county jail after approximately 20 hours in custody. Marquardt, who has pleaded not guilty, has been ordered by a judge to have no contact with her daughter. Now, we debated this here in the Breakfast Club Black Mothership newsroom, and the president of the Fat Lives Matter Committee, surprisingly, wasn't as upset about this as I thought he would be.

He literally asked me, why is the woman getting donkey of the day? I said, because A, she assaulted her child, and B, because she wasted poultry. He said, no, she didn't waste poultry. That Tyson or Purdue was frozen. You can still cook that. Touche.

Touche. Then he also said she didn't assault her child. That was just discipline. Now, I understand why he said that because culturally growing up, when I was disciplined as a black person, whatever my parents could get their hands on to whip me with, they was going to use. Okay, I've gotten beaten with an assortment of weapons.

Remember those big wooden spoons some folks would have up in their houses, decorations? My mom had those in the kitchen of the single wire trailer we grew up in. I done got hit with that. I done got beat with an extension cord and made to go take a bath. I done been hit with boxes of King Vitamin cereal. See, that's why so many kids quick to talk back now because they don't look around and see what could be a threat.

All right? When I was young, I looked around and assessed the situation. What is in this room that I could get hit with? And if there was nothing to be hit with in the room we was in, if parents didn't feel like being creative, oh, in the country, you had to go outside and pick the weapon they was going to use. Yes, go pick your own switch. So I understand why the president of the Fat Lives Matter Committee believes that this was just discipline, but it wasn't. This is good

old-fashioned assault. And furthermore, at some point we have to start recognizing the low emotional IQ of some adults. This is just an emotionally unstable person who is fed up with life and projecting on her child, projecting that pain by turning frozen poultry into a projectile. Now, they didn't disclose the age of the child, so she must be a minor, but the victim did state to police that Mary threw the frozen chicken at her and it struck her on the right leg. Hmm. I don't, uh, hmm.

I don't want to minimize this child's pain or what they went through, but that child wouldn't have survived in the 1900s. My daddy beat me with an extension cord and made me go take a bath afterwards. I had friends who got beat with the engine belt of a Honda before. We had to pick our own switches and it was ass-cutting by committee

back then. Everybody reserved the right to whip your ass if you wasn't acting right. Back then, folks could have conversations. It wasn't like they were just jumping to conclusions when other people told your parents they had to beat you. They told your parents if you wasn't acting right okay and back then folks could have conversations it wasn't like they were just jumping to conclusions when other people you know told your parents they had to beat you they told your parents what you did and depending on what you did you might end up getting two beatings that day because your parents might deliver an entree after the appetizer someone just gave you okay we used to get paddled in school by principals and then disciplined by

the village if need be and once again there was nothing worse than having to pick your own switch do you know what that does psychologically to a kid to have to go pick the weapon that's going to be used against you huh because you know if you bring something too small back that doesn't look like it will hurt your parents gonna make you either go pick another one or they're just gonna go and pick one themselves so you really had to pick the right switch to beat your own ass who thought of this we need to figure out who is the first person to make a child go pick their own switch because that was cruel and unusual punishment and if this young kid can press charges against her mom because she got frozen chicken thrown at her then what can we do i feel

like those of us born in the 1900s born and raised in the 1900s should be entitled to some form of compensation okay i feel remorse for whatever this child is going through but the inner child in me is like damn that's all that's it okay i get triggered when i see extension cords now okay all right i can go home right now to moscow in south carolina and see that same tree i used to have to pick switches from and immediately can feel that switch on my ass i have core memories about those beatings but this young child this young child not about to stop eating chicken this young child not about to go vegan this child not about to feel away. This child not about to feel a way when Project Pat Chickenhead or Cardi B Bickenhead comes on.

I'm not trivializing this child's pain at all. I'm just simply saying we went through worse and we didn't get our parents arrested. And we probably didn't because, bruh, do you know what kind of whipping I would have gotten for calling the police on any of the adults that raised me? Are you serious?

Anyway, please give Mary Marquette the biggest hee-haw. Is it just discipline, though? I feel sorry for you, bro. Don't feel sorry for me. I do. I'm fine. Switches?

Well, you grew up in the city, so you never had to pick a switch. You probably got rats thrown at you. Shut up, man. Shut up, man. Rats and bagels. Timberlands and Air Force Ones? No, man. Your daddy was wearing Timberlands? No, man. Oh. Jesus man. Rats and bagels. Timberlands and Air Force Ones? No, man. Your daddy was wearing Timberlands? No, man.

Oh. Jesus Christ. Alright. Thank you for that donkey of the day. Donkey of the day is brought to you by the law office of Michael S. Lamisoff. Don't be a donkey. Dial pound 250 on your cell and say the bull if you've been hurt in a construction accident. That's pound 250 from your cell and say the

bull. Wake that ass up early in the morning. Wake that ass up. In the morning. The Breakfast Club.