The Breakfast Club - DONKEY: Florida Woman Busted With Drugs Found In Bag Labeled 'Bag of Drugs'

Episode Date: August 2, 2024

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Hey guys, I'm Kate Max. You might know me from my popular online series, The Running Interview Show, where I run with celebrities, athletes, entrepreneurs, and more. After those runs, the conversations keep going. That's what my podcast, Post Run High, is all about. It's a chance to sit down with my guests and dive even deeper into their stories, their journeys, and the thoughts that arise once we've hit the pavement together. Listen to Post Run High on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or, you are a donkey. I'll show you how to act a donkey.

Everything that Charlamagne is saying is true. Yes, donkey of the day for Friday, August 2nd, goes to a 41-year-old Florida woman named Lauren Riley. Now, what does your Uncle Charla always tell you about the great state of Florida? Say it with me. The craziest people in America come from the Bronx and all of Florida, and today is no exception.

I believe Florida is the actual internet. Craziest people in America come from the Bronx and all of Florida, and today is no exception. I believe Florida is the actual internet. You ever be online and see some of the most mad, insane, deranged, nut-ass things happening and say to yourself, where is this? Okay, this can't be the earth I live on. I feel like 95% of those things we see like that online come from Florida. Therefore, Florida is the actual internet. Now, y'all know what a charcuterie board is, right? You know what a charcuterie board is, right?

Charcuterie board, of course. Yeah, that's like the... Meat and cheese. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I love stuff like that. French fruit. French appetizers, they call them. They got the selection of preserved meats and cheeses,

what you like, the meat envy. And it's got like other tasty things, you know, arranged on like this wooden board or stone slab. Meat is pretty good. Yeah, I know. I know. So Lauren was busted with what can only be described as a crack cootery board. The reason it's a crack cootery

board is because she had a smorgasbord. Okay, a spread of crack, meth, and pills. Oh, she was trying to get hired and want a future's hosts. Okay? Unlike that, Future said, all my hoes do shrooms, all my hoes do coke.

Personally, I think Future should get new hoes. But if that's what he's into, Lauren is taking it to another level because she does crack, meth, and pills. Now, addiction is a disease, so I wouldn't give someone donkey of the day for that. But the drugs are the reason she's getting the biggest hee-haw. See, Lauren was sitting in the passenger seat of a car when her friend was pulled over in St. Petersburg for failing to wear a seat belt at 1130 a.m. on Saturday. A state trooper allegedly saw Lauren

reaching for something on the passenger side floor, and then the trooper spotted a small burnt piece of tinfoil. A piece of tinfoil isn't nothing but an air fryer for crack. So when the cops saw that air fryer for crack. So when the cops saw that air fryer for crack, he asked Lauren to step out the car. Then he searched her purse. And in that purse was the crack, the meth, the pills. And she had that whole crack cootery board in a container. And on the container, she had it marked, written, put in black and white, committed to ink on the container. I'm not making this up. It said, bag of drugs.

Lauren had a pouch in the car that literally said, bag of drugs on it. Okay? And so she had 3.25 grams of cocaine, 1.75 grams of crack, and 1 gram of crystal meth. Not to mention 4.5 pills of an anti-anxiety drug, 1.5 opioid pills, and two pills of an ADHD stimulant, along with drug paraphernalia, like a metal spoon, a syringe, and four glass pipes. Now, I need to know how many bags do you own, Lauren? How many bags do you have that look alike that you had to label one bag of drugs? And even if you don't have any bags that look alike, why did you need to write bag of drugs on the pouch? Now, I am a person who does edibles, okay?

I do them for my anxiety. I do them to relax. I know my dosage, 10 milligrams. I'm good. I'm sharing that to say, never in my days of doing drugs are selling them. Have I ever had to label something bag of drugs? This is the type of stuff my wife does at the house.

You know, you go in the bathroom, things are labeled. You know, you got your toiletries, your dental stuff, soap, you know, just like things are labeled in the kitchen. Bread, snacks. But one thing I have never, ever, ever, ever, ever seen in my history of life is someone having a bag of drugs labeled bag of drugs. That sounds like something that would be on a bag from a clothing store called the High Street Boutique or Dose of Style or a

restaurant, the Dose Diner, the Crack Cafe. that would be on a bag from a clothing store called the High Street Boutique. Our dose of style. Our restaurant, the Dose Diner. The Crack Cafe. Lauren was charged with drug and paraphernalia possessing, and she has since been released from the county jail. No need to try to make sense of any of this, ladies and gentlemen. Just know, it's Florida. Please give Lauren Riley the sweet sound of the Hamiltons. You are the donkey of the day.

You are the donkey of the day. Yee-haw. All right. Well, thank you for that donkey today, sir. Donkey of the Day is sponsored by renowned personal injury attorney Michael the Bull Laminsoff. Don't be a donkey when you need a fighter on your side. If you're ever injured, go to MichaelTheBull.com.

That's MichaelTheBull.com. And when you mess with the bull, you get the horns. Wake that ass up. In the morning. The Breakfast Club. After those runs, the conversations keep going. That's what my podcast Post Run High is all about. It's a chance to sit down with my guests and dive even deeper into their stories, their journeys, and the thoughts that arise once we've hit the pavement together. Listen to Post Run High on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.