The Breakfast Club - Donkey Of The Day Throwback

Episode Date: July 8, 2022

Now whooo gettin that Donkey today?See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

As a kid, I really do remember having these dreams and visions, but you just don't know what is going to come for you. Alicia shares her wisdom on growth, gratitude, and the power of love. I forgive myself. It's okay. Have grace with yourself. You're trying your best. And you're going to figure out the rhythm of this thing.

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That's Escape from Z-A-Q-istan on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Hey, guys. I'm Kate Max. You might know me from my popular online series, The Running Interview Show, where I run with celebrities, athletes, entrepreneurs, and their stories, their journeys, and the thoughts that arise once we've hit the pavement together. Listen to Post Run High on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

Hey, what's up? This is Ramses Jha. And I go by the name Q Ward. And we'd like you to join us each week for our show Civic Cipher. That's right. We discuss social issues especially those that affect black and brown people but in a way that informs and empowers all people. We discuss everything from prejudice to politics to police violence and we try to give you the tools

to create positive change in your home, workplace and social circle. We're going to learn how to become better allies to each other so join us each Saturday for Civic Cipher on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcast or wherever you get your podcasts. Hey, y'all. Niminy here. I'm the host of a brand new history podcast for kids and families called Historical Records.

Executive produced by Questlove, The Story Pirates, and John Glickman, Historical Records brings history to life through hip-hop. Each episode is about a different inspiring figure from history. Like this one about Claudette Colvin, a 15-year-old girl in Alabama who refused to give up her seat on the city bus nine whole months before Rosa Parks did the same thing. Check it. And it began with me. Did you know, did you know?

I wouldn't give up my seat. Nine months before Rosa, it was called a moment. Get the kids in your life excited about history by tuning in to Historical Records. Because in order to make history, you have to make some noise. Listen to Historical Records on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

I was born a donkey. It's the donkey of the day. Did you see? Donkey, donkey, donkey. One, two, three. It's time for the donkey of the day. Did you see Donkey? Donkey. What the f*** is that? It's time for the Donkey of the day. That's pretty funny. You trying to mean the devil?

Possibly. The Breakfast Club. Yes, Donkey of the day goes to Vivian De Quarez, a.k.a. Polka. I know I pronounced her name all wrong. I hope I got Polka right. But she's a Brazilian singer. I never heard of her, but I am sending her healing energy this morning. This is a teachable moment. And I'm sending her healing energy because she needs it. Okay. I want to tell

you all something this morning, and I mean it from the bottom of my heart. Actually, I don't mean it from the bottom of my heart. I simply mean it from my bottom. Okay. There is someone out there. There's someone out there right now who needs to hear the words that are about to come out of my mouth. There is someone somewhere right now who is going through what I am about to discuss. Maybe somebody in this room. Okay, they are holding something in that they want to get out to the world. And I need you to know, don't hold it in anymore. Okay. I know it hurts. Okay. I know it hurts to let it go, but sometimes it hurts more to hold on. And I am giving you permission this morning to let it go. Let it go. Let it go. Okay. I know you can't hold it back anymore. I don't care if you're in a car with people on public transportation with people under the covers with, with your loved one in a room full of people, ma'am or sir or they, if you have to fart right now, do it, okay? Let it go, all right?

Airbrush your boxes. Let off a 21 anal salute. If folks next to you have to feel a little backdoor breeze, do it. They will live, but you possibly won't if you hold your farts in. That's what happened to Polka. Okay, that's why she's getting donkier day to day. She was sent to the hospital to be treated for trapped gas because she didn't want to fart in front of her boyfriend. All right?

Let me hear some fart sounds, Ray. Get me in the mood. I need something harder than that. I need something wet. Nah, that means you're trying. You're forcing it. I like the natural ones. They're like, there you go.

All right. Polka. Polka. All right, Red. Let that man go. You can't tell him to stop farting. All right. Got it all out, Red?

All right. Polka, what are you doing, baby girl? Okay, you're not on farting terms with your boyfriend, so you held them in? How many of y'all out there are not on farting terms with your significant other, so you hold them in? And if you don't want to fart around them, why didn't you just go to the bathroom, Polka? I do it all the time. Why? Because I don't fart.

I don't hold my farts for nobody, but also I don't fart in my clothes. Okay, I don't fart in my clothes. When I need to blow my big brown horn, I go into the bathroom, pull my pants down, and I let that brown horn brass choir sing. Okay? Now, Polka is 27 years old, and she shared her gas problems with her 15.7 million followers on Instagram. She wrote, and I quote, I woke up at 5.30 a.m. with severe stomach pains and ended up in the hospital.

She then assured her followers she is all right and then she added but that's but that's it guys i'm now fine just an accumulation of trap farts she then went on to encourage her followers to pass when freely she said and i quote girls don't be ashamed to fart in front of your guy uh because what's really embarrassing is not letting your guy sleep because you're in discomfort. Going to the hospital with your guy and the diagnosis being trap farts, end quote. To be honest, I didn't know trap gas was a thing. But according to the New York Post, it occurs when methane does not move through one's intestines normally,

causing sufferers sharp pain or discomfort in their abdomen. Give me a fart red wow all right red now i don't be on tiktok okay i do have a tiktok at c to god c-t-h-a-g-o-d but it's strictly for books i think book talk is an amazing hashtag and i love the fact that literacy and literature is being pushed so heavy with that hashtag drop on the clues bond for book talk damn it okay you know you walk in bonds and nobles now Clues Bond for book talk, damn it. Okay? You know, you walk in Barnes & Noble's now, you see a whole book talk section. So, yes, when I do post TikTok videos, it's about books.

Okay? I love to read and I have a book in print, Black Privileged Publishing with Simon & Schuster. So, it makes sense. But there's a lot of other information on TikTok. For example, this doctor named Karen Rajan, who back in September warned people about the dangers and health risks of holding in your farts. Listen to what she had to say. I'll tell you some important facts about farts. On average, people fart 14 times a day. The more, the merrier.

If someone tells you they don't fart, they're lying and you should disown them immediately or they've got a bowel obstruction, which is a medical emergency. Your average daily fart volume is enough to fill up a medium-sized balloon. Happy birthday. The first fart of your day is usually medical emergency. Your average daily fart volume is enough to fill up a medium-sized balloon happy birthday. The first fart of your day is usually the largest. 75% of farts are produced by bacteria in the large intestine. Digestive food that isn't broken down is chewed up by bacteria that produce microscopic farts and these microscopic farts accumulate and become one of your regular farts. 25% of farts is swallowed air that you don't burp and dissolved gases from the

blood making its way into your intestines. 99% of a fart is non-smelly gases, usually hydrogen, methane, and carbon dioxide. Hydrogen and methane are flammable, which is why you can light a fart on fire, not recommended. The 1% of farts that do stink are volatile sulfur compounds like hydrogen sulfide. If you hold in a fart too long, it can be reabsorbed into your blood circulation and breathed out when you exhale. The noise of a fart is a combination of anal stink to vibrations and the percussion of butt cheeks against each other. Fart velocity and butthole tightens determine the sound anal first of all that misgendered the man his name is karan

okay apologies karan didn't mean to reduce you to a messy white woman named karen what was that term pressing the butt cheeks together for percussion yes that was an amazing amazing uses of words drop on the clues bombs for dr you okay tok. Your thoughts can catch fire? I guess. All right. That's not what I got from that. What I got from that is if you hold in a fart too long, it can be reabsorbed into your blood stream and breathed out when you exhale. You know what that means?

That means that the next time somebody tells you that your breath smells like doo-doo, it's because it really does smell like doo-doo. Let me hit smash gas right all right red clear it out clear the colon out red there you go there you go okay red recorded himself this morning just to play this yes that's not like a shark if somebody somebody did that around you, you would say to them, bro, you might need to go to the doctor. Something's wrong.

Actually, nothing is wrong. Everything is right. Okay? What's the moral of the story? You got to let your butt burn. Okay? You got to let those flagrant fuzzies fly. When you are having rectal tremors, let that cornhole clap.

Okay? When you are having rectal tremors, let that cornhole clap, okay? And if your health isn't reason enough to let your farts go, then just know you should fart nowadays because at the present moment, farting is the only gas we can afford. Please give Polka the sweet sounds of the Hamiltons. For now you are the donkey of the day. You are the donkey of the day. Yee-haw. I'm a father.

We know. Nick, the camera guy, our digital guy, Nick, drop on the clues box for Nick. He just sprayed Febreze. That's if those farts were real. And we definitely know Envy's a fart. You smell something, right? No, I'm a fart. We know.

You feel like you smell something. I don't fart in my clothes. I'm a fart, too. I just don't fart in my clothes. I'm a fart. My wife taught me something, too. She taught you how to fart? No.

Well, yeah, she did. That's wild. She said if you're in bed, right, and you want to fart, but you don't make no noise, you just spread your cheek, and it just... So that's why you just randomly do that sometimes? You don't need no excuse to play with your butt. If that's what you want to do, if you want to spread those cheeks with your own hands, do it, Kane. Evan does that all the time in here, and now we know why.

And you don't hear it. It's no... That makes sense, though, because the doctor said the doctor said that the butt cheeks pressed together cause the percussion so if you spread them yeah okay

so if you in bed with your boo you don't want your boo to know you fart and you just spread your own ass cheeks spread your own ass cheeks y'all is some kink

that's why y'all got six kinks I only got four y'all is kinky you in the bed spreading your own ass cheeks oh my goodness. Gear getting you pregnant. Well, this is something new we learned today.

I just spread your cheeks for no reason. Thank you for that tip, Andy. There ain't even no doctor around. You ain't getting no colonic, no nothing. You just like. You know how many people are trying this right now thanks to you? It works. No colonoscopy happened.

You just in there spreading your cheeks for no reason. And you got a fart, but you don't want it to do it because you don't thanks to you. It works. If no colonoscopy happened, you just in there spreading your cheeks for no reason. You know when you're in the bed and you got a fart, but you don't want it to do it because you don't want to be... I better never hear you be uncomfortable about getting a colonoscopy, okay? Hey, you know, it's crazy. Envy does sit up here and randomly spread his cheeks. I did not know why he was doing that.

Spread them! Oh, my goodness. He's searching you for contraband. You want to search him for contraband, Ray? No. All right, thank you for that donkey of the day. Up him for contraband, Ray? No. All right. Thank you for that donkey of the day. Up next.

You didn't press the cheat spot. Spread the cheat spot. Up next, ask Envy if you have any questions about how to spread your cheat spot. The Breakfast Club. As a kid, I really do remember having these dreams and visions, but you just don't know what is going to come for you. Alicia shares her wisdom on growth, gratitude, and the power of love. I forgive myself.

It's okay. Have grace with yourself. You're trying your best. And you're going to figure out the rhythm of this thing. Alicia Keys, like you've never heard her before. Listen to On Purpose with Jay Shetty on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Hey guys, I'm Kate Max. You might know me from my popular online series, The Running Interview Show, where I run with celebrities, athletes, entrepreneurs, and more.

After those runs, the conversations keep going. That's what my podcast, Post High is all about. It's a chance to sit down with my guests and dive even deeper into their stories, their journeys, and the thoughts that arise once we've hit the pavement together. Listen to Post Run High on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. What is that? Bullets. Listen to Escape from Zaka-stan. That's Escape from Z-A-Q-a-stan. On the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Hey, y'all.

Niminy here. I'm the host of a brand new history podcast for kids and families called Historical Records. Executive produced by Questlove, The Story Pirates, and John Glickman, Historical Records brings history to life through hip-hop. Flash, slam, another one gone. Bash, bam, another one gone. The crack of the bat and another one gone. The tip of the cap, there's another one gone.

Each episode is about a different, inspiring figure from history, like this one about Claudette Colvin, a 15-year-old girl in Alabama who refused to give up her seat on the city bus nine whole months before Rosa Parks did the same thing. Check it. And it began with me. Did you know, did you know? I wouldn't give up my seat.

Nine months before Rosa, it was Claudette Colvin. Get the kids in your life excited about history by tuning in to Historical Records. Because in order to make history, you have to make some noise. Listen to Historical Records on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Hello, my undeadly darlings.

It's Teresa, your resident ghost host. And do I have a treat for you. Haunting is crawling out from the shadows, and it's going to be devilishly good. We've got chills, thrills, and stories that'll make you wish the lights stayed on. So join me, won't you? Let's dive into the eerie unknown together. Sleep tight, if you can. Listen to Haunting on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.