The Breakfast Club - It's Up There:Big Loon & Ajna Surah - 'Red Flags Like Six Flags' Part 2

Episode Date: March 17, 2024

The Black Effect Presents... It's Up There! Gear up for a fiery Part 2 on Its Up There Podcast as Ajna Surah and Big Loon dive deep into the complexities of celebrity life, spotlighting Tyrese Gibson's publicized personal battles. From discussing the fine line between public perception and private woes to tackling gender dynamics in the digital age, this episode doesn’t shy away from the hard truths." Key Discussion Highlights: Tyrese Gibson's Public Struggles: An exploration into Tyrese Gibson's relationship with his ex-wife and current girlfriend, and the broader implications of dealing with personal issues in the limelight. Navigating Hard Times Publicly: Loon argues the importance of sharing struggles to potentially help others, while Ajna questions the boundaries of public disclosure. Online Attacks & Gender Dynamics: Ajna shares her experiences with online harassment by men, sparking a broader discussion on controlling relationships and when assertiveness crosses into coercion. The Vetting Process in Relationships: Insights into the importance of carefully choosing who enters your life, with Loon emphasizing the need for a thorough 'vetting process.' Masculinity and Emotional Toughness: A critical look at why some men display toughness towards the women they love but not in other environments, and the psychological impact on women who observe these behaviors. Community Engagement: "What are your thoughts on the topics Ajna Surah and Big Loon tackled in this heated episode? From Tyrese Gibson's personal saga to the debate on public vulnerability and relationship dynamics, where do you stand? Engage with us in the comments section below." Exclusive Patreon Content: "Dive deeper into 'Its Up There Podcast' with exclusive content available on our Patreon at www.patreon.com/ItsUpTherePodcast. Join the community for more insightful discussions and behind-the-scenes access." #itsuptherepodcast #tyresegibson #divorce #debateSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

As a kid, I really do remember having these dreams and visions, but you just don't know what is going to come for you. Alicia shares her wisdom on growth, gratitude, and the power of love. I forgive myself. It's okay. Have grace with yourself. You're trying your best. And you're going to figure out the rhythm of this thing.

Alicia Keys, like you've never heard her before. Listen to On Purpose with Jay Shetty on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Had enough of this country? Ever dreamt about starting your own? I planted the flag. This is mine. I own this.

It's surprisingly easy. 55 gallons of water, 500 pounds of concrete. Or maybe not. No country willingly gives up their territory. Oh, my God. What is that? Bullets. Listen to Escape from Zakistan.

That's Escape from Z-A-Q-istan. On the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Hey, y'all. Niminy here. I'm the host of a brand new history podcast for kids and families called Historical Records. Executive produced by Questlove, The Story Pirates, and John Glickman, Historical Records brings history to life through hip-hop. Get the kids in your life excited about history by tuning in to Historical Records. Listen to Historical Records on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. the code of longevity, and new tools are helping us live better and work smarter. Each week, I sit down with big thinkers like Bill Gates and Malcolm Gladwell to separate hype from hope. Listen to The Next Big Idea on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. I'm Cheryl Swoops. And I'm Tarika Foster-Brasby.

And on our new podcast, we're talking about the real obstacles women face day to day. Because no matter who you are, there are levels to what we experience as women. And T and I have no problem going there. Listen to Levels to This with Cheryl Swoops and Tarika Foster-Brasby, an iHeart Women's Sports production and partnership with deep blue sports and entertainment. You can find us on the I heart radio app, Apple podcast, or wherever you get your podcast presented by capital one,

founding partner of I heart women's sports. Rapper Tyrese Gibson. I don't do it. But you gotta let me, you know, I'm a professional. I don't got no opinion. But you gotta let me, you know, I'm a professional. I don't got no opinion. So you gotta let me, you gotta let me do what I do. I wanna listen to you. Yeah, please do. And respect, respect

my space. I am, I'ma listen. Because that's public, I believe that it's okay to speak about that. I don't, but come on. Tell me why. Because it ain't none of your business and they didn't ask you to have an opinion about their life. And everybody navigating through they shit. There's some shit me why. Because it ain't none of your business, and they didn't ask you to have an opinion about their life, and everybody navigating through their shit. There's some shit out here.

So it ain't their... It's hard. Life is hard, baby. But it's not their life in particular. I believe everything is passed down. There are things, and you can only ask me about yourself. You can't do hypotheticals, possibilities. You can't talk to me about your sister or your cousin or your mom. It's about you.

It's impossible to be all about me and talk to you. And then we can't have a conversation about the things that's being displayed. People can, but I find something else to do personally. Like what? Like mind my business. Because I got my own shit I'm working through. And they didn't ask me nothing. So, but don't you do healing so how are you helping people when this is a public situation that we're speaking to

I've lived through some of how people will take your name and take your situation and have an opinion and talk the most about the that they know the least about and drag you and you will be all through the headlines with your pain and your shame and they'll take least about and drag you and you'll be all through the headlines with your pain and your shame and they'll take a little bit of truth and a whole lot of lie and you'll be conversation so i just don't mention people that's why you hear me say tyrese in specific who's been on who gave it to the internet right that's what i'm saying when you're sitting next to a high this is high level game i'm talking about and i receive what you're saying i'm the highest this is the end of the bosses on the game like

when you done beat everybody else far as game being applied i'm playing major game is being applied okay it seemed like your only experience with conversation surrounding turmoil has been bullshit i'm a true that is very true there's building happening next to next to boy there's building happening in real time next to people going through these things that's picking up a podcast and saying your perspective changed my life. And that's how I feel. And that's why I want to reach out personally. But see, sometimes you don't got that luxury. Sometimes you ain't in that position and they ain't in that position.

That's true. Sometimes you got to give it to the world. This is the problem I had when one of these podcast guys was speaking at Rick Ross and Meek Mill and D, all these guys. I'm saying, saying listen respectfully to your position but get it get a solution to the world get a solution to the world don't be so selfish well oh man come on man don't be so selfish where this gotta be in my face for me to bless the building i'm blessing everybody in the sound of my voice when you have been shown the door and if you choose to overstay your welcome after you've been shown the door

to love is very much necessary but i don't have to be my last my last serious circumstance i wasn't in love with that man i respected him Because I can suck and feed and be there and be a confidant and assist. And I don't have to be in love with you. But the moment that I smell your and you start doing that, now you affecting my respect level. And I can't do this and respect you.

The desire for me, this is where I'm vulnerable at.'ve always sought a protector so i'm learning how to keep myself safe and as i learn how to keep myself safe i identify danger differently because danger used to look like six flags and mother red flags because it's safe over here. This is where I'm at. Right. I put the whole family at jeopardy when I start to lose respect for you. Ready to exchange love is what costs you something, but you can have all the love

that you want to have and not give it to nobody. But the moment that you begin to activate an exchanging of it, that's when it costs you. That's when it's currency, but love by yourself, love is free. It's to be, it's like, it's a resource.

It's a natural resource. Love. Yeah, like water. What you did with that water? You piss in it, you spit in it, you wash your face with it, you take care of it, you use it, you filter it, you nurse your body with it.

And what you do with your love? Where you put it at? Where you give it to? A million speeds. It with it? Or what you do with your love? Where you put it at? Where you give it to? Bill Williams, bitch. It's on you. What you do with your money? You make your money, make more money. You treat your dollars like soldiers. And if your soldiers ain't out recruiting more soldiers, your army dying, is that how you treat your dollars?

Or what you do? You just them off on some goofies? Bill Williams, bitch. What's up? That niggas want to loan me to death. It's a little loan. Yeah, exactly. It's my man loan. That's my man too. Both loans. Old loan, new loan. I don't want somebody that is I don't want somebody that is, um, I don't want somebody that is, like, dominating to the capacity of abuse as a thing for me. Yeah, for sure, for sure.

Like, you gotta watch how you talk to me. You gotta talk, like, I don't, I don't want abuse. But you handle so, you, you, you so, you dig? It ain't any vibration that's... Like, you don't gotta raise your voice at me. You ain't gotta yell at me. I ain't gonna do at me i ain't gonna do nothing but you also got that bitch spirit not you but i'm saying in women there's

there's this i got it you got the bitch spirit sometimes see a nigga can't then a nigga take a bitch spirit and he pull out a nigga spirit here's the thing and this is why i say sometimes i don't it's not something that i activate in um. I believe if I know that my man is upset, I don't yell. I don't have match your energy energy. That's right, yeah. I don't have that. I don't have that. I try not to deal with people that I got to have match your energy energy with.

However, what I do believe is when it comes to communicating with men, if a woman isn't processing that a man is communicating like a man to her, if he acting like a bitch, she better act like a nigga. And that happens a lot. So it be situations. But who is she to say what is acting like a bitch? Who are you to say what's acting like a nigga? Well, because if you put yourself in a nigga position.

If you put yourself in a bitch position. What's a bitch position? You tell me. I know what a nigga position is. you put yourself in a nigga position if you put yourself in a bitch position what's a bitch position you tell me i know what a nigga position is i don't know because i don't do bitch shit yeah but i can say when you identifying like a nigga i can say say you putting yourself in a nigga position yeah you swinging at a nigga throwing shit that's what i'm saying them is nigga positions you putting yourself and i And I don't know the details, you know, but it's a lot of Nah, I'm just, I've been in, I've had personal experience. And we're in la-la land. We in content world. No, we

gonna bring it to my house. Okay, let's bring it to them. I've been in personal situations where I had to say, listen, this is some ho shit and I'm not used to this. I'm not accustomed to a man behaving this way. This is a concern for me. Yes. Cause I'm surprised, I don't feel safe under these conditions. Right.

This is some bitch shit. And I'm concerned. I'm scared for my life. Right. Because I didn't know that this was what you do over here. Right. And I'm scared. And y'all get hit with the switcheroo so much.

Man, let me hit you with the oldie. What? Do you understand me? Yeah, yeah. Nigga will hit them with the switcheroo. It's the baited switch. I know. So what do you think women should do about that?

Because a lot of women do experience that. And I hear men saying it too. Yeah, we all do. And it's the thing of... But that's my... You know what my thing, one of my superpowers is? I stay consistent out the door. I make your breakfast on the morning, I leave your ass.

I still feed you, baby. Facts. Me too. I'm paying shit after I'm gone for a little while. Let me take that for a real one. Get your shit together, baby. Facts. Me too. I'm paying shit after I'm gone for a little while. Let me take this. Get your shit together, baby. Don't give me facts. Oh, I know I smelled it on you.

Yeah, get your shit together. This is how you know if you're a real one in real life. Look at your history. And be honest. Get by yourself. This is between me and you and God. This is how you know if you're solid. Do you leave people better than you found them?

Facts. If you don't leave people better than you found them, you're more fucked up than you realize, and I want you to talk to somebody. Right. And so let's get back to what was we just talking about before that? We can talk about whatever you want. You got good conversation.

We got a lot to talk about. Yeah, I appreciate that. Don't talk to me then, buddy. I appreciate that. We was talking about, what the fuck was we talking about? Narcissist. No, but controlling. Oh, controlling.

Yeah, so they say I give controlling. That's because you can't protect what you can't control. So you got to know. That's protection. Yeah. And you know what I tell them is that usually the people that come to me and say i'm controlling are the same people that dump it on my left after it's fucked up the irony whatever happened in their life they bring it to me after it's fucked up and they

wonder why i'm always peeking over i said maybe to the left a little bit. No, maybe to the right. Get it together. Because ultimately, and if I'm saying knowing his participation, I 100% have dealt with every issue these people have from every level. The people that's even able to use controlling with me. Because until I'm clocked in, it's identified that I'm clocked out. You know what I mean? It ain't no cut on that. I'm nowhere in in, it's identified that I'm clocked out. You know what I mean? It ain't no cut on that. I'm nowhere in your area taking care of nothing until I'm in your area and I'm taking care of everything.

All right then. So it ain't no in between. Don't say that again. I like when you say that. Say that. Don't even say it. You know what I'm saying? Don't even say it.

It ain't no in between with that. But you know, you feel me? So I'm saying the key is that I'm trying to explain to them that when you close enough to say I'm controlling, that means you close enough to affect my mission. My life. Yeah, my life. Everything I'm rolling with. You close enough for me to have to have my input involved in things to protect.

So I have a question for you. So when you move with people and you get intimate with them, and now you're a part of their life and you know intimate things about them, how do you handle that information? Handle what? The information that you know, that you've learned by getting close. Because that's something, too. A lot of people want access. They want information but can't be trusted with information.

For example, it's like you being with someone, seeing someone, and allowing them to see the back office of your life. And then when they're no longer at peace with you in the moment, now they're bringing up something that ain't got nothing to do with nothing because it's a sensitive topic for you. I try to be, ain't no try to. Tell me. I'm gentle

With people I care about I got secrets still That I still ain't let out By people By women I got things I've done Certain things Like you said

I'm going to die with certain things Straight like that That's part of the game. And when I become involved with people and it gets to a certain level, that's a forever level. I receive that. Right. And we talk about information-wise, not bond-wise, because I cut a bond off. I'm a nigga that'll cut a bond off.

I don't fall victim to history or none of that. I respect history, but I ain't a prisoner of history. I don't really have much loyalty to who I was yesterday beyond the fact that she got me here today. And what I mean by that is this. Whoever isn't activated in an invested interest in who I am today, I don't see why I should have loyalty to you. They play their game with me, right?

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use Vanta to manage risk and prove security in real time. Our audience gets a special offer of $1,000 off Vanta at vanta.com slash special. That's V-A-N-T-A dot com slash special for $1,000 off. As a kid, I really do remember having these dreams and visions, but you just don't know what is going to come for you. Alicia Keys opens up about conquering doubt, learning to trust herself, and leaning into her dreams.

I think a lot of times we are built to doubt the possibilities for ourselves. For self-preservation and protection, it was literally that step by step. And so I discovered that that is how we get where we're going. This increment of small, determined moments. Alicia shares her wisdom on growth, gratitude, and the power of love. I forgive myself. It's okay. Like grace. Have grace with yourself. You're trying your best and you're going to figure out the rhythm of this thing. Alicia Keys, like you've never heard her before. Listen to On Purpose

with Jay Shetty on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Is your country falling apart? Feeling tired, depressed, a little bit revolutionary? Consider this. Start your own country. I planted the flag. I just kind of looked out of like, this is mine. I own this. It's surprisingly easy. There are 55 gallons of water for 500 pounds of concrete. Everybody's doing it. I am King Ernest Emmanuel. I am the Queen of Ladonia.

I'm Jackson I, King of Capraburg. I am the Supreme Leader of the Grand Republic of Mentonia. Be part of a great colonial tradition. Why can't I create my own country? My forefathers did that themselves. What could go wrong? No country willingly gives up their territory. I was making a rocket with a black powder, you know, with explosive warhead. Oh my God.

What is that? Bullets. Bullets. We need help! We still have the off-road portion to go. Listen to Escape from Zakistan. And we're losing daylight fast. That's Escape from Z-A-Q-istan on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

What's up, y'all? This is Questlove, and I'm here to tell you about a new podcast I've been working on with the Story Pirates and John Glickman called Historical Records. It's a family-friendly podcast. Yeah, you heard that right. A podcast for all ages. One you can listen to and enjoy with your kids starting on September 27th. I'm going to toss it over to the host of Historical Records, Nimany, to tell you all about it. Make sure you check it out. Hey, y'all. Nimany here. I'm the host of a brand new history podcast for kids and families called Historical Records. Historical Records brings history to life through hip hop.

Each episode is about a different inspiring figure from history. Like this one about Claudette Colvin, a 15-year-old girl in Alabama who refused to give up her seat on the city bus nine whole months before Rosa Parks did the same thing. Check it. Get the kids in your life excited about history by tuning in to Historical Records. Because in order to make history, you have to make some noise. Listen to Historical Records on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Hey there, I'm Dr. Maya Shunker, a cognitive scientist who studies human behavior. On my podcast, A Slight Change of Plans, I marry science and storytelling to better understand how to navigate the big changes in our lives. It was like a slow nightmare, you know, because every day you think, oh, surely tomorrow I'll be better.

And I would dream of being better. At night I would dream that my face was quote-unquote normal or back to the way it was. And I'd wake up and there'd be no change. I also speak with scientists about how we can be more resilient in the face of change. You can think of the adolescent brain as like the social R&D engine of our culture, that they're something that looks like risky and idiotic to us is maybe their way of creatively trying to solve the problem of having social success and fewer of the things that bring you social failure. Listen to A Slight Change of Plans on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever

you listen to podcasts. Stages, right, from street. But hold on, wait a minute, though. I got to qualify that. Go ahead. Because it's some people that I don't have direct connection to right now that I still have loyalty to. But they not.

Okay, I said what I said at the right time. Because they're still pro who I am today. Like, I can still call them if I needed them, even though they're not active every day. So I just wanted to qualify that for myself. Yeah, no, for sure. I be checking myself for hypocrisy. Like, I got to walk my talk for real.

Yeah, no, and that's respectable. Like, you got to respect that. I do the same thing. Like, I'll say something and correct that two minutes ago. I said this. That's part of it. But I think that, what were we talking about? We were talking about loyalty and how, like, people, you know,

how you carry your loyalty with you and where you get it from. Oh, okay. This is the thing I tend to find also because I'm moving through so many stages is that because opportunity lives inside of my relationships now. See, when you come from the street, there's a level of opportunity that lives with your relationship, but it's not on the stakes. The stakes are much higher now.

And so everybody that I involve myself with, there's a vetting process that I got to respect no matter how emotionally aware and peaked I am. I can like you and, man, we can be having a great time, but I got to respect this process because it's too much on the line. It's really dangerous when we don't filter people right because we have feelings for them. That is one of the greatest ways to get ourselves fucked up.

And then that's how you get cracked and that's how you get broken and now you gotta unfuck yourself yes and if you don't want to admit that it was you that let them in in the first place now you're dealing with resentment but how much is it you letting them in and them being a fucked up person here's the thing it's how long but they get to stay before they crack you because a lot of times we can still we can get away quicker than we do at times that That makes so much sense. That makes so much sense. Because I've overstayed my welcome. Every time that I've ever been in any kind of situation

where I've overstayed my welcome, that's when I've gotten hurt. Yeah. And me, you know, because I think so much too, sometimes men, we know kind of the woman we're dealing with, whether we act on it, whether we ignore it. Tell me about that, when you say men know the kind of when we know kind of the woman we dealing with whether we act on it whether we ignore tell me about that when you say men know the kind of woman that they're dealing with so if you got a woman that you know you know how you got it you know the terms you know about what she will do okay you know about what who she'll do it with okay right um and so sometimes you find yourself battling with scenarios. You put that woman in. You try to keep her like some somewhat like a mother does to a son.

You find me and trying to keep these women out of these certain scenarios because they think that it'll trigger behavior that compromises the relationship. Tell me more about a certain scenario. Like what kind of scenario? Because I've never been in a predicament where there was a place that I wasn't invited to or a meeting that I couldn't go to or a conversation that wasn't had in front of me because I specialize in being trustworthy. Yeah, and see, you different in that way. That hasn't been passed down.

I wanted that for myself. Right, that hasn't been passed down. So a lot of times dudes don't feel safe in that way around women. That's not how this works. There is a thing where that's a fun time that we come to have. Like you are here for the fun. Oh, yeah. Well, then that's different.

Yeah, but the scenario we're talking about is that men will, say you, say. Well, if you try to make a fun time a lifetime, that's on you. Right, but say you got a girl, and you are a guy that runs a business. You got a six-figure business. All right. And your girl tends to like the guys that, say in the back of your mind, you know she's with you for the money. Get rid of that bitch.

Of course. We don't even operate in that arena, but we're dealing with scenarios for the sake of content. Okay, come on, content. So you're a six-figure guy. Now you spend the rest of your time with her trying to keep her away from the nba guys losing money that's what i'm saying lose she in the way of the money if you can't if you can't trust her around the money she ain't got no business around you

facts because let me tell you something if i'm locked in i'm locked in i it's all kind of men that get at me when i'm locked in I don't open a DM I wish the fuck you would make mine feel lesser than I push your shit back bitch I'm not playing with you I don't want no man feeling comfortable when I got when I'm tucked away I'm tucked away so if you're if you're allowing other men to feel comfortable with disrespecting your man you the problem it's you and it's by way of you but your man, you the problem. It's you. And it's by way of you. It's you.

You the problem. Yeah. Because it's going to be all kind of things attracted to you. What you entertain is a reflection of you. You are who you entertain, not what you attract. All kind of shit like the light. So dealing with a man that's high priority, though, it gets slippery. How slippery do it get? So dealing with a man that's high priority, though, it gets slippery. Because some of these women try to identify that as saying, like, you know. Listen, this is what I tell women, and I would love for you to consider this.

Please don't set yourself up in a deal that you don't agree to. If you don't want to fuck other men other than him, but you just know that he's out there doing something else so you decide to do something else too that's your pussy bitch that's them don't extra miles for nothing right you know disappointing your dad yeah like that you don't have to become somebody that you don't want to be because you like somebody that you really don't like because you're now becoming that somebody that you don't want to be in their presence go where they fuck with you at the thing of it is you don't fuck with the niggas that fuck with you but

what if you but what if you love this nigga then that's your problem because why you love something that is so bad for you if this what you do in the name of love it was good and we just we just building so it was good right until when until we ignore the weeds and it fucked the garden because let me tell you something i know about red flags that look like sick flags i got some right but you have to decide when you realize that it's cracking you up you have to decide when you have been shown the door and if you choose to overstay your welcome after you've been shown the door. So do you trust love?

Is love real? Yes. And love covers a multitude of sin. And I know some men that love me today because I love them. And love covers a multitude of sin. Because I seen that shit you did. And love covers a multitude of sin. Because I seen that shit you did. You said you still safe with me.

That's love. So love is an essential. Love is very much necessary but I don't have to be. My last serious circumstance, I wasn't in love with that man. I respected him. Because I can fucking suck and feed and be there and be a confidant and assist

and I don't have to be in love with you but the moment that I smell your pussy and you start doing that whole shit now you now you affecting my respect level and I can't do this and respect you but I don't have to be in love with a man to be so so do. So do you have room for love and respect? Absolutely. I'm talking about from two different people. Right? So I respect this guy. But, man, I love this guy.

I don't fuck with the nigga that I love. Especially if he ain't good for me. If I'm loving somebody that ain't good for me, then I got to examine why I love this motherfucker. This nigga I want to call right now on my line. Do you understand me? He got that shit I like over there. I'm not answering you. I don't even need to hear your voice because you got that shit I like. I love some of that shit you got over there, but you ain't do right by me. So I got to stay over here and I got to stand on it. Because I told you last time you talked to me was going to be the last

time you talked to me. And be the last time you talked to me and i'm gonna stand on it and it don't change that you got that shit that i like over there it don't change it i still like it too i do i still like it a lot so i'm saying that's that's deep so but but but i'm, so, but for the person, so why don't you have room for the person you love? Because. It sounds like you're seeking out people that you respect more than you love. Always, especially when dealing with a man. Because men don't function with love the way that women function with love.

That's facts. That's facts. So I don't care about how much I love him. If the respect don't show up when it's supposed to show up, no, none of that motherfucking love matter. It don't. Because when you need to shut the fuck up, and no matter how much you love him, you just got to say it

because you don't respect him the way that he need to be respected. You don't respect him enough to shut the fuck up, but you love him enough to suck that dick. No thank you. I'm going to take the man I love. I'm going to take the man that I shut the fuck up for. That's facts. And I can appreciate that.

I never thought of it like that because. Because that's going to save my life because he protects us. See, I put the whole family at jeopardy when I start to lose respect for you. Because then I begin to implement and or allow behaviors that are disrespectful. And we can't afford that because we're building something. So I don't got to love you.

We can figure love out later on. I agree with you. I just don't think a lot of women have that. And I could be wrong. There's a lot of them out here. They be in the healing place. There's a lot of them too. I breed them.

That's beautiful. For real. When you understand that respect level, because, again, that love is tied to that emotion, and that emotion will make you say things, do things. I love love. I do. I like it.

I don't know if I trust love. Love ain't to be trusted. I don't think love is to be trusted. How can you love love and not trust it? Because here's the thing. There's so many different dimensions. Because love don't cost you nothing goddamn lie here's the thing and this is why love don't cost you nothing they're like the fact that you're ready to exchange love is what cost you something but you can have all the love that you want to have and not give it

to nobody but the moment that you begin to activate an exchanging of it that's when it costs you that's when it's currency but love by yourself love is free you can have all the money in the world until you spend it and then when you start spending it that's when it catch up with you yeah but but you gotta you gotta spend the love you can be a miser what is that like a miser is like a wealthy person that just like penny pinch and they're real frugal so you can be a miser with your love so I'm saying but how effective is that how effective is it depends upon what what's your protect it depends on what you like I don't get to I don't get to tell you what to do with your love no but if we saying that like I can't tell you

what to do with your money right but if we saying love ain't to be trusted. Because. But it sits next to the emotion that allows you, allows things to sneak past your common sense. Just like bread. Motherfucker signing them contracts, sneaking right past their common sense. That's facts. So I'm trying to understand if love ain't to be trusted, how the hell do we love love?

It's to be, it's like it's a resource. It's a natural resource. Love is. Yeah, like water. What you did with that water? You piss in it, you spit in it, you wash your face with it, you take care of it, you use it, you filter it, you nurse your body with it.

And what you do with your love? Where you put it at? Where you give it to? It's on you. What you do with your money? You make your money at, where you give it to. It's on you. What you do with your money? You make your money, make more money. You treat your dollars like soldiers. And if your soldiers ain't out recruiting more soldiers, your army dying, is that how you treat your dollars?

Or what you do? You just fuck them off on some goofy shit. Love. What you do with your love? What you do with your energy? Energy free. Everything energy, energy, every motherfucker. Yeah. Energy is like love, baby. What you going to do with your life? What you do with your energy? Energy free. Everything energy, energy. Every motherfucker.

Energy is like love, baby. What you going to do with it? Yeah. And I utilize love. Energy free. And I utilize energy. I utilize love, but I just don't. I don't trust it. You can't trust energy.

Shit. Listen. I trust energy. Electricity. I trust energy. I'm saying this. I'm saying I trust frequencies, Electricity. I trust energy. I'm saying this. I'm saying I trust frequencies, and this is the difference. Energy, like saying you can, energy is electricity.

You can use electricity to cook a man dinner. You can use electricity to cook the man. Shout out to Bob Proctor. That's energy. Frequency. The feeling of it. Energy, emotion, emotions, frequency. Now, I trust them.

I lean into them. But here's the thing. If you can't trust yourself, you can't even trust what the fuck you feel. And if you don't have an accurate reflection of self where you see yourself clearly, you can't even trust what you feel. Even when I didn't trust me, I trust the frequency, though. I understand. That's because you view frequencies differently.

And you view frequencies through the power of you and yourself. And there's a part of you that is just in you. It ain't on you, nigga. Yeah. And everybody ain't got that testimony. Yeah, it's like if you were the girl, right? That's different. You could be like.

What you be doing with them girls? You could be like, you don't want to know. It gets, it gets. You know what I'm saying? I don't want to know. I don't even want to know. You do want to know. No, I turned my mind. You do want to know. Actually, no, I don't. You do want to know. No, I don't want to know. It gets, it gets. You know what I'm saying? I don't want to know. I don't even want to know. You do want to know. No, I turned my mind.

You do want to know. Actually, no, I don't. You do want to know. No, I don't. I believe you want to know because it's, it's, I think it's, it needs to be studied. You know what I'm saying? I believe it needs to be studied. Is that right?

I'm a scholar. Yeah, that's what I'm saying. And, but, but say you were the girl like, right? Because again, my emotions may have, and this is my younger self. that's what i'm saying and um but but say you would a girl like right sad because again my emotions may have this my younger self now i operate out of pure i'm just a founded man so i'm i'm strong in all areas but say i will be with a girl or men find themselves and let me take it off me men find themselves in situations sometimes where they're with girls that their emotions have tricked them to be around. Maybe they like her.

She thick. She got a big ass. She pretty. Whatever it might be that entices them to involve themselves with the woman in that way. But they get around them in the frequency. Tell them something off. I've had that with men a lot of times.

For real? Yeah. That's what I mean when I say I can smell your pussy. And I don't care how many zeros come behind that shit. I don't care how many gifts what you wrap that bitch up in. I don't want it. Take it. Yeah, see, I think it's a hurtful thing

for a woman to see a man catch pussy. Do what? I think it's a harmful thing for a woman to see a man catch pussy. Yeah, it's terrible. It's heartbreaking. It's gut-wrenching. Man.

Yes. Yeah, I'm ashamed what they did to that dog. Yo, so let's talk about, you know, you said something a few minutes ago I think was interesting, that you don't fuck with the person you love. At this season, I can't even say it's love, but I can relate to really feeling somebody and just saying, nah. And they got that shit I like, too. I wonder.

I think I'm with you on that, but I want to build this out some because it's a lot of people wondering why that's a good decision. As a kid, I really do remember having these dreams and visions, but you just don't know what is going to come for you. Alicia Keys opens up about conquering doubt, learning to trust herself and leaning into her dreams. I think a lot of times we are built to doubt the possibilities for ourselves. For self-preservation and protection, it was literally that step by step. And so I discovered that that is how we get where we're going. This increment of small, determined moments. Alicia shares her wisdom on growth, gratitude and the power of love. where we're going. This increment of small, determined moments.

Alicia shares her wisdom on growth, gratitude, and the power of love. I forgive myself. It's okay. Like grace. Have grace with yourself. You're trying your best and you're going to figure out

the rhythm of this thing. Alicia Keys, like you've never heard her before. Listen to On Purpose with Jay Shetty on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Is your country falling apart? Feeling tired, depressed, a little bit

revolutionary? Consider this. Start your own country. I planted the flag. I just kind of looked out of like, this is mine. I own this. It's surprisingly easy. There are 55 gallons of water, 500 pounds of concrete. Everybody's doing it. I am King Ernest Emmanuel. I am the Queen of Ladonia. I'm Jackson I, King of Kaperburg. I am the Supreme Leader of the Grand Republic of Mentonia. Be part of a great colonial tradition.

Why can't I trade my own country? My forefathers did that themselves. What could go wrong? No country willingly gives up their territory. I was making a rocket with a black powder, you know, with explosive warhead. Oh my God. What is that? Bullets. Bullets. We need help! We still have the off-road portion to go. Listen to Escape from Zakistan. And we're losing daylight fast. That's Escape from Z-A-Q-an on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Sup, y'all?

This is Questlove, and I'm here to tell you about a new podcast I've been working on with the Story Pirates and John Glickman called Historical Records. It's a family-friendly podcast. Yeah, you heard that right. A podcast for all ages. One you can listen to and enjoy with your kids starting on September 27th. I'm going to toss it over to the host of Historical Records, Nimany, to tell you all about it. Make sure you check it out. Hey, y'all. Nimany here.

I'm the host of a brand new history podcast for kids and families called Historical Records. Historical Records brings history to life through hip-hop. Each episode is about a different inspiring figure from history, like this one about Claudette Colvin, a 15-year-old girl in Alabama who refused to give up her seat on the city bus nine whole months before Rosa Parks did the same thing. Check it. And it began with me. Did you know, did you know? I wouldn't give up my seat.

Nine months before Rosa, it was Claudette Colvin. Get the kids in your life excited about history by tuning in to Historical Records. Because in order to make history, you have to make some noise. Listen to Historical Records on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Hey there, I'm Dr. Maya Shunker, a cognitive scientist who studies human behavior. On my podcast, A Slight Change of Plans, I marry science and storytelling to better understand how to navigate the big changes in our lives. It was like a slow nightmare, you know, because every day you think, oh, surely tomorrow I'll be better. And I would dream of being better. At night, I would dream that my

face was quote unquote normal or back to the way it was. And I'd wake up and there'd be no change. I also speak with scientists about how we can be more resilient in the face of change. You can think of the adolescent brain as like the social R&D engine of our culture. That they're something that looks like risky and idiotic to us. It's maybe their way of creatively trying to solve the problem of having social success and fewer of the things that bring you social failure. Listen to A Slight Change of Plans on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen to podcasts.

Hey, I'm Gianna Pardenti. And I'm Jimei Jackson-Gadsden. We're the hosts of Let's Talk Offline, the early career podcast from LinkedIn News and iHeart Podcasts. One of the most exciting things about having your first real job is that first real paycheck. You're probably thinking, yay, I can finally buy a new phone. But you also have a lot of questions like,

how should I be investing this money? I mean, how much do I save? And what about my 401k? Well, we're talking with finance expert Vivian Tu, aka Your Rich BFF, to break it all down. I always get roasted on the internet when I say this out loud, but I'm like, every single year you need to be asking for a raise of somewhere between 10 to 15%. I'm not saying you're going to get 15% every single year, but if you ask for 10 to 15 and you end up getting eight, that is actually a true raise. Listen to this week's episode of Let's Talk Offline

on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Because you got to learn how to take care of yourself. And until you... How are you taking care of yourself by not getting something you like? Because you got to figure how to take care of yourself. And until you. How you taking care of yourself by not getting something you like. Because you got to figure out where you like it. And if you like something. Because we be liking shit that don't really be good for us.

It just feel good to us. Until it don't feel good no more. And then you mad at you. See ain't nothing like being mad at yourself. Because can't nobody fuck you up like you. Facts. You know you so well. You can't run from it up like you. Facts. You know you so well. You can't run from it.

Let me tell you something. Wherever you at is where you be. You're going to be wherever you at. You can't run from yourself. You take you wherever you go. Everywhere. And so until you learn why you are entertained by, you are enticed by shit that ain't good for you,

then you have to discipline yourself. So that may feel like a punishment. Discipline feel like a punishment at first. That's facts. That shit hurt at first. It used to hurt, but now it feel perfect, baby. Nah. Can't come over here with that. Right. But it used to hurt at first.

At first, you know, it feel like a motherfucker tied a tire to your chest at first. You feel it in your solar plexus, in your wheelhouse of decision making. You better be disciplined. You better pat your cracks. How do you as a woman develop that, though, being emotionally centric?

Like, how do you? I'm still developing it. I'm always under construction. I wonder you being tricked by a man, right? I think. I was just recently bamboozled. That's what I'm always under construction. I wonder you being tricked by a man, right? I think. I was just recently bamboozled. That's what I'm saying. And this is what I think people may not know is like.

I was in a whole engagement. That's why I don't give the internet my business. Yeah. That's why I don't tell who and what and when and where. I don't care if the internet never know who dick I'm sucking. I don't care. It ain't your business. Right.

Yeah, but I know that you're vulnerable. Yes. The desire for me, this is where I'm vulnerable at. I've always sought a protector. So I'm learning how to keep myself safe. And as I learn how to keep myself safe, I identify danger differently. Because danger used to look like six flags.

Them motherfucking red flags. Because it's safe over here. Bitch, he killed niggas. This is where I'm at. Right. Until this motherfucker choking you in a bathroom. Right. You know?

So you got to see yourself. You got to see yourself. You got to see it. And you got to lean all the way into it. You got to feel it. And you got to lean all the way into it. You got to feel it. It ain't going to feel good. And you got to lean into the pain of it. It's a whole lot of power in that pain.

I wrote a healing guide called Hurt to Health. And that's all it is about. It's like how you get fucked up and unfucking yourself. Yeah. That's dope. That's dope. How long ago was that you wrote when did i release the healing guide i released it in 2019 and it's live that's dope i the creator even gave

me an actual hierarchy of hurt for pain identity and recovery i can teach that shit in schools but yeah it's just it's a process and you can't afford to be mean to you because you're gonna see yourself and you're not gonna be happy with you and can't nobody fuck you up like you so you're gonna have to show yourself grace and you won't even be able to show yourself grace until you're grateful because grace requires offering and if you knock on the door of grace asking for grace grace is going to say what what do you have for me and grace only accepts gratitude and exchange facts so until you're grateful you can't even get no grace and a lot of times we be in situations where we don't be grateful like you you're not grateful for your ability and your capacity to do this shit again. I'm like on my fourth life in this life.

I'm grateful. What you grateful for? Your motherfucking hustling hand, girl? Go get them. Did it again. Do it again. And do it again and do it again. Stack that shit up.

Go do it. Do it again. You know, something is telling me, though, with you. What? It's telling me that I wonder, do you have room for another heartbreak? Like on some jagged-ass shit, like, I can't take another heartbreak. I just wonder, because, you know, with you operating the way you operate. I welcome my experience. You don't get to pick none of this shit.

I'm just going to keep it on the level, you know? Like if it get fucked up beyond repair, it ain't going to be me to fuck it up beyond repair because I want this shit to work. See, for me, I think I can't take one because I'm calculated. I feel as though I'm watching everything. I'm on top of everything. I'm teaching.

I'm leading in this space. I'm helping men develop. It's so much expectation with my dealings of really everything i'm involved with nobody's expecting this shit come with heartbreak though and just because it's not romantic it still break your fucking heart when you see man these motherfuckers out here right when you smell that pussy on them that shit break your heart oh that's been doing you know what i'm saying like when i see like nigga, nigga, you want a damn. That been fucking over me.

You understand me? And I got to eat it. Yeah. Because if I say something, if I react to it, I put the pain on my face. Yeah, and here's the thing, and that's the reason why you got what they don't have, and it's in you, and it's not on you, because you're not emotional about this shit. But you got feelings, baby. That's the reason why you got what they don't have, and it's in you, and it's not on you because you're not emotional about this shit. But you got feelings, baby. Yeah.

That's all right. And that's where the safe place to land comes in. Bring your feelings over here. Come and feel with me. We should feel each other. Like that's where that energy comes in at. And that's what men need. So how do you – why are you being divorced with that vibration, though?

Or why are you in a divorce when you have that? I'm not divorced. I didn't go through with the I do. So why, I mean, why aren't you married with that vibration? Because I don't want no bitch-ass nigga. And they don't realize that they be bitch-ass niggas. Like, a lot of bitch-ass niggas don't realize they bitch-ass niggas until they come into the frequency of a real one. like they find themselves tucking their tail in and then they

bring that resentment back home to their girls and their wives because you do shit to your woman that you wouldn't do to no motherfucking man her ass nigga that's facts because see and that was my thing see i can i could even i was in a situation where i tried to date something totally different than what i'm accustomed to what my palate is accustomed to and um it was just an interesting experience because I can accept the fact that you're not a tough guy you know just don't get tough with me wow and that's what well that's the only place I can get tough at and that's the problem hoe ass nigga see now now I can't do that shit that I do with a clear conscience because I only do

it because I respect you because love come later for me. Right. And that's the thing. These dudes find themselves in a position where they don't got the nuts to tell the boss man how they feel or they don't got the nuts to tell the homeboy over here or the niggas working for him or the people stealing from him. But they love him, I keep telling you, this is why love is a scapegoat.

These niggas find love and get inside of there and dump everything they got that's wrong with them. But that's... And that's good, but it's heavy. It's heavy. It is heavy. It is heavy. And I'm not saying that anybody should be anyone's emotional trash can you know or emotional toilet like nigga just come home keep shitting on you you know but what i do want you to consider is this is he even trying like encourage him to go talk to somebody

and let him know, like, this is a lot for me to take in. This is affecting my processing centers as your woman. Baby, you need to talk to somebody about this. You know, because even for me, coming from everything, and, you know, I get tired of reiterating that but i know it's so many black young boys following me right and so they see me and they some of them i'm in this weird discovery mode and i want them to know that it's room it's light at the end of that tunnel just keep going but because of all of the things that that I've encountered and endured and experienced and explained,

and because of how I evolved, I'm now in a position to tell myself, I don't know if I have enough room to consider someone in that way, right? You definitely do. I don't know, man. You got plenty. It's just you don't see how she could fit in. But there are certain women that just fit the fuck in. That's their specialty.

They figure out how they fit in. And that's all. Just keep on living, baby. Now, man, that's it is very deep but you still so so you think that because you said the reason you let you you've been in a situation where because i think it's so much to build on that where it's say bro don't come home and get tough with with your old lady you ain't when you lady. When you ain't tough in the world. You ain't been tough nowhere in the world.

But you in here with your chest out. And I suck your dick. And she love you. And I be feeding you and clipping your motherfucking toenails and rubbing your ass down and shit. But you mad at me. Yelling in here. Boy.

That shit is, hey. I'm telling you. These motherfuckers is crazy. It's deep, man. It's crazy. This shit deep. This world is a wild place. You understand me?

So I'm saying, are you disappointed with that? This world is a wild place. I'm just visiting. Me and you both. I'm just visiting. Me and you both. I'm going to have to tell them, give me a wristband. So this, give me a, boy, this motherfucker.

I'm just visiting. You understand me? This shit is weird. This shit is wild. This shit give me a, boy, this motherfucker. I'm just visiting. You understand me? This shit is, this shit is weird. Wow. This shit is really weird though. But weird means something beautiful. Weird means creator of magic and a bunch of,

a bunch of beautiful things by way of etymology. So this shit ain't weird. This shit is fucked up. Like it's something else. So, okay. I can't agree with that. So we ain't gonna give them weird.

Weird belongs. I can't agree with that. Weird belongs to somebody else. Right. It ain't for them so what is it strange i find it disgusting okay cool i find it disgusting yeah when you look at a man and you think to yourself like what you want me to do you want me to eat you out next nigga what you want me to do next eat you out like your hairline nigga damn now is that so you you you contribute that to to the raising of this uh it's it always always goes back to the roots and the roots are the parents and so the mother raised him then someone raised the mother when does that that, so that cycle continues?

It's like Kanye said, it's going to always be haters. That's the way it is. Hater niggas marry hater bitches and have hater kids. Think about we trying to get this to a place to sustain what I was doing away from this. It ain't the other way around. You know what I'm saying? It's like I'm losing pivoting over here, and I'm blowing my face up.

You know what? And then, yeah, that's what I was about to say. Like, then you're exposing yourself. You just said it when I was thinking it. Yeah, it's like. Because that exposure, like, it's a certain type of man that really value privacy above all things. Lord have mercy. You can't come over here with that shit.

Lord have mercy. So imagine being with a man that say he want to turn half of the house into a motherfucking Airbnb and motherfucking strangers going to be knocking on the door where I lay my head at night. You don't know me. You don't know me. I ain't got no business over here. I ain't got no business over here.

You don't know me. Yeah, you can't do that. I said, that's what you would think? That would be your idea to make some money? Yeah. You done hit rock bottom as far as your decision making. You done took me some way. You done got on the interstate you're just gonna let you're just gonna let them get me so that's what we do but you're just gonna let them get me i come from my uncle and them man

i come from that's what i'm saying i come from a solid foundation like my uncle and them would and we talk about million dollar niggas would be collecting cans and just keeping the hustle alive. Nigga would still be getting water heaters. You know, in the South, dog, we got trucks. Where you from? I'm from here. Oh, okay. Yeah, so we from here.

So I would be with my uncle as a little boy, and he'd be a million dollars, worth a million dollars. And he might got the truck filled up with cans taking it down here to the spot to get 48 dollars for the can and i'm saying damn why you still see because there's arrogance associated with having money that the old man granddad and them didn't have that these young whippersnapper niggas Get a little money and go to smelling they self They don't respect it as the tool that it is And that's why so many men don't appreciate it

When a woman say it don't matter how much money you got If you a bitch ass nigga you a bitch ass nigga Nigga money cannot unlame you niggas Money cannot unlame you niggas I don't give a fuck how much bread you get I don't care how many dicks you suck in the back office I don't care how much pipe you take, nigga.

And you walk out with 10 million, you still a whole ass nigga to me. Facts. Straight like that. And every stretch of the imagination. And they know that. And the sad part about it is the money don't cover that up. Don't.

So even when you get in the mirror, even when you see yourself, you know I'm really a sucker. And that's where the resentment comes in. And then now you don't have good intentions for other people because you know subconsciously they see you and nobody around you is really checking you. Because they benefiting from the person that you hate being the most, and that is your current self. Wow. That's dope.

That's a good game you give. And I think that, you know, it's important for us dudes to hear this, you know, hear this game that you. From a safe space. Yeah. Because I know what it's like. Because I know your mama didn't mean to fuck you up like that. It don't negate the reality.

You fucked up, baby. Now come over here and let me help you unfuck yourself. And this is what I do. Welcome. Welcome. Welcome to the healing place. What do you do about dudes that try to fuck on you while you're trying

to help them unfuck themselves? I have a clause. To say what? Like, the moment that you press up on me, I don't take you as a client anymore. And this is why.

Not because I don't like that money, because I do. I want it. But it's the integrity of it all. I do this because God told me to. And I know the moment that money, because I do. I want it. But it's the integrity of it all. I do this because God told me to. And I know the moment that you feel it enough to express it,

you're no longer going to present to me what needs to be presented so that we can really get you some help. And you got to be honest to get the help. So that's why. But a safe space is so attractive. Niggas is thirsty. Yeah. It's dehydration.

Niggas want to fuck me. Bitches want to be me. That's on purpose. Yeah. So help me understand. Niggas want to fuck me. Bitches want to be me. That's on purpose. Yeah. So help me understand how you swat that down. Very carefully. You got to watch how you throw things away. I've lived through some shit in my life.

Behind not throwing shit away right. Behind not disposing of things with integrity. Need to come back and haunt you too. That's right. So I know how to put shit away nice and neat these days. I want to talk to you about rapper Tyrese Gibson. I don't do it. You can't talk to me about Tyrese.

Why not? Because he ain't here and he ain't asking. No, but you gotta let me. But you gotta let me. I'm a professional. I don't got no opinion. So you gotta let me do what I do. I want to listen to you. Please do. And respect my let me do what I do. I wanna listen to you. Please do. And respect my space.

It's important we do that. It's an opportunity for me to give you something here. I respect that. So go on and share it with me, King. Rapper Tyrese Gibson and his wife had a very public relationship and divorce. My question to you is surrounding what we spoke

about earlier about getting a person that you actually want okay i believe that it is to because tyree's in my opinion spoke to how much he really cared and loved for this girl. And so when a man opens his self up in that way, and this conversation isn't particularly about them. We use them as a sticker as to framework in what we're speaking about. And because that's public, I believe that it's okay to speak about that. I don't, but come on. Tell me why. Because it ain't none of your fucking business,

and they didn't ask you to have an opinion about their life, and everybody navigating through they shit. There's some shit out here. So it ain't they. It's hard. Life is hard, baby. But it's not their life in particular. Again, if we don't take things and learn from them, then we,

I believe everything is passed down. Okay, I receive that. I believe you got to learn from these things. If I say, Tyrese, fuck, nigga. I'm saying that if we look at the circumstances. It's a slippery slope, though. Tell me why. Because these niggas out here on the internet be flinging their feelings and their opinions about people who are navigating through real life circumstances

and really going through it. And it hurt. Yeah, but they talking about it in public. It don't matter. So you telling me that they can come out and talk about it and then we can't have a conversation about the things that's being displayed. People can, but I find something

else to do personally. Like what? Like mind my business because i got my own shit i'm working through and they didn't ask me nothing so so but don't you do healing yeah i help people so how are you helping people when this is a public situation that we're speaking to king i'm so glad that you asked me that thank you so this is how it works when people come to me and they ask my suggestions or my opinions on on things and I always ask them to consider I never tell people what to do I just ask them to consider things and you can only ask me about yourself you can't do hypotheticals

possibilities you can't talk to me about your sister or your cousin or your mom it's about you it's impossible to be all about me and talk to you well here's the thing when when it includes other people you can tell me about the situation however we don't get into a conversation about the other person so we can talk about for example I just did a session with a young lady the other night and um like I said, everything that I speak on, it dies with me, you know, so I would never unveil names or identities. But she was talking about just the uncomfortableness of feeling like she needed a break and breaking off her relationship. And then her, her ex comes to get the baby. So she complains about him not getting the baby. And

then when he gets the baby, he takes the baby to his sister's house. And she complains about him not getting the baby and then when he gets the baby he takes the baby to his sister's house and she is upset with him about that and I told her that's none of your business you don't get to choose what he do with the baby after you pick the baby up you want to break or not bitch we're not going to dissect what he's doing and how he's moving we're going to process how you move in your life he is a part of your life outside of the fact that you need a break and you trust him with the child we're not dissecting his behaviors because we don't have no control over him. So what we going to do about us? He is who he is. You know what you know about him. So how do you win? Because you win when you get what you want and you want some peace in your

life and you're not going to get it trying to dissect his behavior all you can control is you do he pick the baby up is the baby safe but see you gotta i'll disagree with that because if i dissect right if i'm dealing with someone okay and they exhibit a behavior that i never want to see again it's important me it's important for me to examine them in a way where I know what that behavior looks like, the indicators of that behavior. I agree with that. So I have to judge people that I'm involved with. Yes, but are you involved? That's different.

For example, we're not involved with the people that you named. But people that you're involved with we can have a different conversation about like i i speak to my therapist about my mother i speak to my therapist about that's what i'm saying so so when i and and i made it clear i think that the names just shock done something to you yeah i just don't mention people by name right you can talk about situations right and that's that's what but but when when i mention them name, it ain't for you and everything ain't going to be for you. I receive that. Right. And sometimes it's for these youngsters is watching these young women, these young men. It's viewing us as we operate with whatever information we got.

I receive that. You see. So as they are watching these celebrities and their lives are running alongside what they're doing. My job in this space is always to put my perspective next to a situation. I don't find it productive to demean anyone or say anything bad, but I do find it productive for the own watchers to say, hey, the perspective I find about man damn it's rough when you get a girl that you really want because that break your heart when she walk out the door you see the reaction sometimes you can't control your emotions you blurt things out sometimes you you kick her clothes out sometimes you won't pick the baby up right and

it ain't in particular with these people but it's by way of their situation i receive that we try to teach from i get exactly what you're saying i do but i've been attacked in the media like i'm i've lived through some shit of how people will take your name and take your situation and have an opinion and talk the most about the shit that they know the least about and drag you and you'll be all through the headlines with your pain and your shame and they'll take a little bit of truth and a whole lot of lie and you'll be conversation so i just don't mention people yeah and i think that it's a space that that's happening i just don't that's why i don't do it that's why i stay like all the way on the other side of the line. But it's hard when you in content world.

I received that. So I'm saying it's going to be hard to navigate. I like it hard. Hard is my favorite. Yeah. But you know, I can appreciate that. But,

but, but when you in content world and you, you got to have some of these rough conversations and as our job is content creators is especially with money, big money on the line the job is to have the conversation in a way where you don't lose your integrity you don't offend anyone but it's more you're more giving your perspective and trying to teach based on your experience well you would have to school me on that I would I would need you to coach me through that because I'm so far on the other side of the line that I'm known for not fucking.

That's one of the things that I'm known for. I don't do trending topics. I don't do gossip. And it's not trending because this ain't even trending. This has been dead. Well, I'm not saying that it's trending now. I'm just saying from like where I drew my line. So that's something that I would definitely be open to.

Yeah, and that's why I'm glad we're building on it because I find it really interesting. Because I don't fuck with it. Anything that got anybody's name in it, those are real people in real situations with real lives. And they didn't ask me. I don't have no opinion. But you know, every book is written off the lives of people. And I understand that. And that's how they pass information down.

I wrote a healing guide for my life. So all this information is based on yo damn y'all see what happened with them man somebody write that down pass that back to the to the next group crop of humans right and so if we are living in this communication age in which you operate with a voice that's extremely powerful and gives perspective as to sometimes what a man feels like or what a woman feels like in these kind of circumstances right say you deal with like because let's if if this was a clickbaity situation we would have started the conversation with diddy you see what i'm saying like shit. This isn't that. We've been talking for,

I don't know how long, and it's just been about game. We've been kicking shit. Yeah. Yeah, but all I'm saying is that it's our job to some kind of way, find a way, to have some of these rough conversations.

I would need some coaching on that. And do them in a way without. I'm way on the other side of the line. I would need some coaching for that. You see, but it's rough. Why did you, so you so okay tell me why you draw such a fine line because i if if a person doesn't specifically and i've known i've been known for this since middle school like this is part of my foundation you can't come to me and talk to me

about other people like even even in conversations when i. Yeah, but I think it's a bad framing because if I accept that framing, then I let people view that like that's what I'm trying to do. And that's not the circumstance. So it's not talking about you. We got cameras on. I got hundreds of thousands of listeners. So this isn't a personal conversation about someone. I know, but they're real people.

And that's just me personally. And I'm not upset. I hope you don't think that just that's just me personally and i'm not upset i hope you don't think oh i don't i'm not easily offended right and that's the reason why i said i would be open to coaching if you have a weight like if you feel like queen i see you yeah and i fuck with you but this right here this may be something that gets in the way of your bread right me and you can have to talk about that's what i'm basically saying you know what i'm saying what i'm saying is that you you you offer a certain perspective. I agree.

And there's a way to, I made money doing this, so there's a way to do it without being offensive. And you're sitting with the king of that. Oh, with the king. You're sitting with the king of it. With the who? Yeah, the king of it. Don't say it, T.

Yeah, the king of it. Straight like that. Yeah, for sure, sure. For sure. For shit sure. So there's a way to and i'm interested in you knowing that because your voice is powerful yeah because i don't i'll be way on the other side you've been attacked in the internet i've dealt with some things was it what did it hurt

you did you feel it was it true it was not true you what I get? And before you answer that, what I get directly from these gentlemen is. And when you talk as a kid, I really do remember having these dreams and visions, but you just don't know what is going to come for you. Alicia Keys opens up about conquering doubt, learning to trust herself and leaning into her dreams. I think a lot of times we are built to doubt the possibilities for ourselves. For self-preservation and protection, it was literally that step by step. And so I discovered that that is how we get where we're going. This increment of small, determined moments. Alicia shares her wisdom on growth,

gratitude, and the power of love. I forgive myself. It's okay. Like grace. Have grace with yourself. You're trying your best and you're going to figure out the rhythm of this thing. Alicia Keys, like you've never heard her before.

Listen to On Purpose with Jay Shetty on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Is your country falling apart? Feeling tired, depressed, a little bit revolutionary? Consider this. Start your own country. I planted the flag. I just kind of looked out of like, this is mine.

I own this. It's surprisingly easy. There are 55 gallons of water for 500 pounds of concrete. Everybody's doing it. I am King Ernest Emmanuel. I am the Queen of Ladonia. I'm Jackson I, King of Capraburg. I am the Supreme Leader of the Grand Republic of Mentonia.

Be part of a great colonial tradition. Why can't I trade my own country? My forefathers did that themselves. What could go wrong? No country willingly gives up their territory. I was making a rocket with a black powder, you know, with explosive warhead. Oh my God. What is that?

Bullets. Bullets. We need help! We still have the off-road portion to go. Listen to Escape from Zakistan. And we're losing daylight fast. That's Escape from Z-A-Q-istan on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

So y'all, this is Questlove, and I'm here to tell you about a new podcast I've been working on with the Story Pirates and John Glickman called Historical Records. It's a family-friendly podcast. Yeah, you heard that right. A podcast for all ages. One you can listen to and enjoy with your kids starting on September 27th. I'm going to toss it over to the host of Historical Records, Nimany, to tell you all about it. Make sure you check it out. Hey, y'all. Nimany here.

I'm the host of a brand new history podcast for kids and families called Historical Records. Historical Records brings history to life through hip-hop. Flash, slam, another one gone. Bash, bam, another one gone. The crack of the bat and another one gone. The tip of the cap is another one gone. Each episode is about a different inspiring figure from history,

like this one about Claudette Colvin, a 15-year-old girl in Alabama who refused to give up her seat on the city bus nine whole months before Rosa Parks did the same thing. Check it. Get the kids in your life excited about history by tuning in to Historical Records. Because in order to make history, you have to make some noise. Listen to Historical Records on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Hey there, I'm Dr. Maya Shunker, a cognitive scientist who studies human behavior. On my podcast, A Slight Change of Plans, I marry science and storytelling to better understand how to navigate the big changes in our lives.

It was like a slow nightmare, you know, because every day you think, oh, surely tomorrow I'll be better. And I would dream of being better. At night, I would dream that my face was,-unquote normal or back to the way it was. And I'd wake up and there'd be no change. I also speak with scientists about how we can be more resilient in the face of change. You can think of the adolescent brain as like the social R&D engine of our culture. That they're something that looks like risky and idiotic to us is maybe their way of creatively trying to solve the problem of having social success and fewer of

the things that bring you social failure. Listen to A Slight Change of Plans on the iHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen to podcasts. Hey, I'm Gianna Pardenti. And I'm Jemay Jackson-Gadsden. We're the hosts of Let's Talk Offline, the early career podcast from LinkedIn News and iHeart Podcasts. One of the most exciting things about having your first real job is that first real paycheck.

You're probably thinking, yay, I can finally buy a new phone. But you also have a lot of questions, like how should I be investing this money? I mean, how much do I save? And what about my 401k? Well, we're talking with finance expert Vivian Tu, aka Your Rich BFF, to break it all down. I always get roasted on the internet when I say this out loud, but I'm like, every single

year you need to be asking for a raise of somewhere between 10 to 15 percent. I'm not saying you're going to get 15 percent every single year, but if you ask for 10 to 15 and you end up getting eight, that is actually a true raise. Listen to this week's episode of Let's Talk Offline on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Talk about this shit. I had to, it's just what it was. you can't be real yeah i get that from these gentlemen even after i've spoke on them or spoke on the scenario because i find i always do that right and this is you do with this information whatever you may because the money lives on on the side of informing these people i agree with. And information is not only important,

it's activation. Because the more you know, the more you can do. Like you can take a different level of control over your life the more that you know, the more well-informed that you are. I just, me personally, I realize I deal with people every day I have a lot of celebrity clientele and I've had people that are all over the headlines and topics of people conversations tell me how this shit is ripping through their soul and their family to see things and everybody got an opinion and everybody got a story and everything just ain't for everybody sometimes it's people that don't say nothing personal about it sometimes it's people that don't give it to the internet the internet just took it so to keep right that's why you hear me say Tyrese in specific who's been on who gave it to the internet right that's what I'm saying when you're sitting next to a high this is high level game I'm talking about and I received what you said I'm the highest

this is the end of the bosses on the game. Like when you done beat everybody else, far as games being applied. All right, Super Cooper. I'm playing major games being applied. Okay. See what I'm saying? I receive that, Super Cooper. I do.

You got your green on and everything. Lord, thank you. I receive that. Thank you for them receiving this. Hey, so all I'm saying is when I say it, when you even hit me, that's why I delved into it. Because I don't even like other people's names. I know you don't know me enough to know this, right? But, yo, nigga, if I tell you it's cheese on the moon.

I'm going up there with crackers. Get your motherfucking crackers to the moon that's what we ain't nothing listen when i do it it's the right way it ain't never the wrong way if you see me dribble through my legs on the court they accepting that now down and do it they can be the first nigga do a crossover they accepting that okay right so what i'm just saying is i usually get from these guys that we learn. It's perspective. Because as they're battling, there's something to be said, too, of when they're battling through those things and in those dark places,

they do need someone that's perspective, that's giving, not somebody that's trying to clout chasing. Because there's a lot of that going on. Yeah, and I can tell you, Ben, something's done happened to you. It's a lot of clout chasing, clickbait. It's a lot of hoe-ass? Yeah, and I can tell you, Ben, something's done happened to you. It's a lot of clout chasing clickbait. It's a lot of hoe-ass niggas and weak-ass bitches. And let me tell you something. I stay way on the other side of the line.

Because not only from my personal experience, like I said, I have a lot of celebrity clientele. I help people. The creator has positioned me to be of assistance to mankind. I help. And a lot of times somebody else may think it's just content, but it's the person's darkest, deepest, traumatic situations that they have to relive in their work environment if the internet is their work environment. And to another content creator, this is also my job, like a news reporter. It's also my job. So I just news reporter it's also my job so i just but it's administering healing by way of words so again when you speak on it and you're speaking from that frequency it's like every time

it seemed like your only experience with conversation surrounding turmoil has been bullshit conversation true that is very true there's building happening next to next to bullshit there's building happening in real time next to people going through these things that's picking up a podcast and saying your perspective changed my life and that's how i feel and that's why i want to reach i'm him but but but see you don't sometimes you don't got that luxury sometimes you ain't in that position and they ain't in that position. That's true. Sometimes you got to give it to the world.

This is the problem I had when one of these podcast guys was speaking, Rick Ross and Meek Mill and D, all these guys. I'm saying, listen, respectfully to your position, but get a solution to the world. Get a solution to the world. Don't be so selfish. Ooh, did you say that S-word? Man, come on, man.

Don't be so selfish. Well, this nigga got to be in my face for me to bless the building. I'm blessing everybody in the sound of my voice. So by way through him, I'm administering healing. By way of words. Because I see this man in his darkest hour. He loves someone. And he felt as though I gave it everything I had.

And he sat there. And he sat there. And he begged. And he begged. And he begged. And us as men, you know how men and niggas is in that same position. I do sessions with them. So that's what I'm saying.

It becomes, see for me, me i'm gonna get money regardless so say say i can charge tyree's 10 grand to come holler at me because i have these nigga pay me top dollar for mentorship top dollar we talking i got a partner get 35 grand for a mentorship we talking these niggas need help they do so sometimes i'm gonna get money i'm saying if i can put something down they're making help somebody or change somebody's life i find myself doing a disservice to the community by not pushing that out there and anytime i see a situation i think that all the way my brain set up ain, it can't be no bullshit coming next to her. Whatever I speak on is with the intentions of trying to give something.

Well, you know what? The culture needs you. Because there's a lot of whole ass niggas out here that ain't got shit to say but some bullshit out they mouth. And that's what, it's smelly. I think they teeth rotten too. I think that's why they breath smell like that. You know, niggas be teeth be rotten for real. Right.

You can tell a lie about a motherfucker open up their mouth. That's facts. That's why I be telling them to say my name like that. They be thinking I'm being sexy. Nigga, I want to see your molars, bitch. That's facts. Say ahsha. Open your head up.

Facts. Yeah, now that's facts. But, you know, I think there's good information, good content, man. Like I said, I just think a lot of youngsters. I think that with your perspective, the culture definitely needs you because it's a very traumatizing experience when somebody has the audacity to speak on your situation and be nothing more than entertained by your trauma, by situations that done fucked you up in life, shook your life up,

cracked you up, broke you maybe. And it's just clickbait for them. And I've seen this. And dealing with you in real time right now is important because it's important for the culture to know that not only are you a safe space, but this is a safe space. Word. This ain't one of them kind of scenarios where a nigga get you in here and he go to talking about your dog, his side, drag you through the mud.

You know what I'm saying? This is what we try to learn. And yo, y'all watch this. If nothing else, this going to be the only soldier die about this. You understand me? This going to be the only one go down about this because we're gonna watch this from here on out because he didn't know and we didn't know and we saw him go through it and whatever he got from it hopefully and them same guys come crawling to me on their hands and knees to have that their final conversation

before they get their self together before it before they finally say that was my last time speaking about it well that was necessary you know as far as like what you provide the element of you the essentialness of you

the necessity of you is appreciated and again I thank I thank God for you I thank you for you cause you need it out here cause I smell they pussy

everywhere tell me tell me but you don't pussy everywhere tell me tell me but you don't say names tell me tell me a scenario in which you're uncomfortable with with social media meaning like some you may have sort of been like yo what this what we doing now from men from men just men that have just gossipy as petty shit What's gossipy and what's informative? Gossipy is anything that you have the audacity to speak on negatively that is not involving you directly. Informative is you getting the positive out of it, sharing it as a learning experience

instead of just conversation between you and your whole ass niggas laughing about somebody else's demise when the minister said when men fall pray because that's that's you that's you getting the opportunity to ask your creator for some grace and that is interesting for me and so i just don't fuck with it you know i just don't and i and i'm with you and i'm glad you you're expressing that because there's a lot of podcasts now that you hit them get into a place where even people will start trying to teach and being like by way of these scenarios because this is important that it happens in our culture because these a lot of people learn that way like what

are your intentions is my question. Now, here's the key. They show them clear because if you let people talk long enough, you'll hear their intentions. And that's a fact, Jack. It'll whistle through. So when you hear some of these podcast guys, and let's say they sit next to someone that a topic has struck them for whatever reason, triggered them, and they want to provide some insight, some introspective conversation about it.

And they going to go, guess what the podcast usually will say? And this is across the board in black podcasting. They usually say, man, nobody want to hear all that shit, man. We here for the jokes. We here for the funny by way of their conversation. And that's why it's so important that you're saying that because that is a reality for content creation in particular for black podcasts you know that's why i think the creator that i'm set apart because i ain't have to showboat and

sambo for none of you hoe ass niggas i ain't bought a follower i never paid for like i am who i am because the creator created me this way and I give thanks people fuck with me because they fuck with me and I don't want to I don't ever want to be even confused or mixed up with none of you hoe ass niggas that do that shit that I don't like so that's the reason why I stay so far on the other side of the tape but when you operate when you enter the business it's like entering the basketball court and saying, man, I don't fuck with that ball y'all play with. It's like, yo, you on this court now. Now, if you were not doing any form of, because whatever you're doing, your biggest commercial is going to be these conversations.

Absolutely. Right? And so with your business being your bottom line and what you have to worry about in this space, it's going to be not, I don't know. I mean, I know we can do it, right? Because we've been talking for a long time without it. But I'm saying, and I don't do it, but how I do it and when I do it is administering direction I think that that is

something to consider yeah and that's I hope you receive that because you're needed in over on that side the way it didn't come for you if it didn't come from you I would probably continue to vehemently reject it right but you know what what you're served is just as important as important as where you're served it like nobody can serve you your favorite meal on a trash can lid once you get to a certain level i don't care how much i like it you can't give it to me like that you better pick that shit up right you better talk to me nice you know so i receive it i do because i do i stay way so far on the other side and because i don't want to be confused with you motherfuckers. But a lot of your relationships can even come by way of that, right?

It's possible. Let's just say, and I'll give you this scenario, man. And I thank the creator because it's like, boy, just because this scenario for those people watching, right? I just hope they get it. Let's just say when the circumstance happened where Erykah Badu or SZA, one of these girls was being called out online by a content creator. And all of these things will just keep very vague for the sake of the conversation. But your ability to step in right then with perspective as to all of that bitch ass nigga shit that you just laid down to see a man attack a woman in a way where it's publicly

embarrassing shame you know something else that i do what's that i let me and check me that's facts but you what i'm saying is you provide perspective to the woman yeah on how to deal with because men are checking me and that's being checked i need that yeah that's being checked but i'm i'm saying your perspective helps the woman in that scenario like say and and what i was speaking about is a lot of your relationships can come by way of that meaning let's say you spoke up in a way that helped an artist like SZA in that moment. Because when I speak up, I do help. I do help when I speak up.

And I'll consider it. And I just hope you receive it. And again, it's for me to give it to you because the money is there. I receive it. Not all of it. And you stay true to the purpose like i'm doing we stay true you in a spot i got children next door like i'm true to the purpose for free them children for free that shit ain't got a 5013c nothing this costs money so this i'm stay true to

the purpose but you don't get on this court right here and say I'm not dribbling the ball. You dig? And I be on the court just standing there. Until you get took out the gym. Well, then take me out the gym. But it don't, why do that when it's money? Fuck this gym. See, see, there you go, there go that emotions.

You see what I'm saying? There go them emotions. But I'm telling you, that's where I be at. But see, the logical man sits back and says, oh, no. No, if I can sit down long enough. And that's why women specifically need a real one that can see the whole board and that you trust to help you make the play. You say.

Because when you are not safe, a motherfucker had you out here going against everything that you feel you shouldn't have never did, making a fool of yourself, putting it all on the line. And you're still out there. You're caught out there. And he ain't even there to keep you safe. Facts. And that's been my situation in my life repetitiously for different ways and different reasons. That's why I stay so far on the other side of the line with different things.

And I'm sorry that happened to you. I'm sorry that happened to you. See, the only way for me to protect myself was for me to just go and get out the way. Because I didn't have no protection on the front lines. And in order for me to get the job done, I need to be on the front lines. But I wasn't safe out here.

So I went and found somewhere to get safe until my head of security came and got me. And you know what I say? It's like, man, that's powerful. But, you know, I say that, yeah. Because it's the people that you help. See, it's the people that you help that'll hurt you. Hurt don't never come from an outside space.

Right. Motherfucker got to be close enough to hurt you yes and it's usually the people that you help in this you know life got a life got a thing about you know surprising you and I don't like surprises so I stay out the way and you know with this content space in particular logics kick in for me because I'm emotionally tied to disrespect as well. So hearing my name hurts me, especially in the mouths of niggas that wouldn't say it in my face. Ho-ass niggas.

You would never say that shit out loud over here, motherfucker. It hurts me. I'll knock your teeth out. Boy, please. And here's the thing, and this is about the transition. This is it. Because I'm a real good girl. I'm a hood girl, though.

And that shit don't work in business. Yes. And when you out there and the only way that you know how to protect yourself to a vast capacity is physical, where you reach out and touch motherfuckers, and now you got shit to lose, and you just can't be touching on people like that, and the spotlight is shining on you. Nigga. As a kid, I really do remember having these dreams and visions, but you just don't know what is going to come for you. Alicia shares her wisdom on growth, gratitude and the power of love.

I forgive myself. It's okay. Have grace with yourself. You're trying your best and you're going to figure out the rhythm of this thing. Alicia Keys, like you've never heard her before. Listen to On Purpose with Jay Shetty on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Had enough of this country? Ever dreamt about starting your own? I planted the flag. This is mine. I own this. It's surprisingly easy.

55 gallons of water, 500 pounds of concrete. Or maybe not. No country willingly gives up their territory. Oh my God. What is that? Bullets. Listen to Escape from Zakistan. That's Escape from Z-A-Q-istan.

On the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Hey, y'all. Niminy here. I'm the host of a brand new history podcast for kids and families called Historical Records. Executive produced by Questlove, The Story Pirates, and John Glickman, Historical Records brings history to life through hip-hop. Get the kids in your life excited about history by tuning in to Historical Records. Listen to Historical Records on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

I'm Rufus Griscom, host of The Next Big Idea. The future is coming faster than you think. AI is reshaping society, scientists are cracking the code of longevity. And new tools are helping us live better and work smarter. Each week, I sit down with big thinkers like Bill Gates and Malcolm Gladwell to separate hype from hope. Listen to The Next Big Idea on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. I'm Cheryl Swoops.

And I'm Tarika Foster-Brasby. And on our new podcast, we're talking about the real obstacles women face day to day. Because no matter who you are, there are levels to what we experience as women. And T and I have no problem going there. Listen to Levels to This with Cheryl Swoops and Tarika Foster-Brasby and iHeart Women's Sports Production And T and I have no problem going there.