The Breakfast Club - Mental Wealth Expo: A Fireside Chat with Tyrese Gibson, Jason Wilson and Dr. Alfiee

Episode Date: October 19, 2024

Cry Like a Man: A Fireside Chat with Tyrese Gibson, Jason Wilson and Dr. Alfiee. Listen For More!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

As a kid, I really do remember having these dreams and visions, but you just don't know what is going to come for you. Alicia shares her wisdom on growth, gratitude, and the power of love. I forgive myself. It's okay. Have grace with yourself. You're trying your best. And you're going to figure out the rhythm of this thing.

Alicia Keys, like you've never heard her before. Listen to On Purpose with Jay Shetty on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Hey, y'all. Niminy here. I'm the host of a brand new history podcast for kids and families called Historical Records. Executive produced by Questlove, The Story Pirates, and John Glickman,

Historical Records brings history to life through hip-hop. Flash, slam, another one gone. Bash, bam, another one gone. The crack of the bat and another one gone. The tip of the cap, there's another one gone. Each episode is about a different inspiring figure from history, like this one about Claudette Colvin, a 15-year-old girl in Alabama

who refused to give up her seat on the city bus nine whole months before Rosa Parks did the same thing. Check it. Get the kids in your life excited about history by tuning in to Historical Records. Because in order to make history, you have to make some noise. Listen to Historical Records on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Hello, my undeadly darlings. It's Teresa, your resident ghost host. And do I have a treat for you.

Haunting is crawling out from the shadows, and it's going to be devilishly good. We've got chills, thrills, and stories that'll make you wish the lights stayed on. So join me, won't you? Let's dive into the eerie unknown together. Sleep tight, if you can. Listen to Haunting on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

Hey guys, I'm Kate Max. You might know me from my popular online series, The Running Interview Show, where I run with celebrities, athletes, entrepreneurs, and more. After those runs, the conversations keep going. That's what my podcast, Post Run High, is all about. It's a chance to sit down with my guests and dive even deeper into their stories, their journeys, and the thoughts that arise once we've hit the pavement together. Listen to Post Run High on the iHeartRadio app,

Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Hi, I'm Dani Shapiro, host of the hit podcast, Family Secrets. How would you feel if when you met your biological father for the first time, he didn't even say hello? And what if your past itself was the secret and the time had suddenly come to share that past with your child. These are just a few of the powerful and profound questions we'll be asking on our 11th season of Family Secrets. Listen to season 11 of Family Secrets on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Thank you. How y'all doing? Okay, I'm going to talk fast because you ain't here to see me.

You're here to see these two gentlemen I'm about to bring out. So let me just say it's an honor to have you here again on behalf of Charlamagne Tha God, iHeartRadio, the Mental Health Alliance, and my non-profit, The Acoma Project, all our sponsors. We're so happy to have you. I'm just going to tell you what's on my heart. I feel like this next 30 minutes is going to be like some healing's going to happen. And so let me bring out my first guest. This brother, you know him, you love him.

He has three books. After this session, because he cares about the people so much, he had to cut his book signing session short. So he's going to be back out there for a little bit of time to sign his book. Now, the books that you all know are Battle Cry and the book we're going to talk a little bit about today, Cry Like a Man. There's another book coming out in January, The Man, The Moment Demands. This brother, every time I watch him, I cry. We met about, I don't know, 10 years ago at an event for SAMHSA, the Substance Abuse Mental Health Services Administration. And he was fascinating then, he's captivating now. So please help me welcome Mr. Jason Wilson. All right.

I can't say enough words about this other brother. I will say I'm Gen X, I'm gonna date myself. I hope you don't get mad at me. I remember him say enough words about this other brother. I will say I'm Gen X. I'm going to date myself. I hope you don't get mad at me. I remember him from Coca-Cola commercial. That's how I got introduced to him. So where my Gen X is at? Make some noise.

That's right. Yeah, Gen X. All right. So this brother, what can I say? My family is a huge transform. Oh, there you go. That's it. There it is. There it is. All right. Thank

you. Appreciate you. So he was like, I ain't doing all that. I'm just going to come out. I am not mad. All right. Let me start this conversation. Yeah. I didn't want to hear my Wikipedia page. It's all good. So let me just start conversation. Yeah, I didn't want to hear my Wikipedia page. It's all good. So let me just start. What's up, everybody? Hello. Yeah, there you go. So I'm just going to start by asking each of you gentlemen,

what was it, if there's any one thing, that encouraged you to start having a conversation about black men and their mental health? For me, it was, I think when I was about to lose my marriage. My wife and I, I remember vividly, were in a heated argument in the kitchen. And she simply, I said, I wish I could spend more time with our son, Jason. And she said that she wished I had that same desire to spend time with her. And she didn't say it in a way that was combative. But I took it as something else I wasn't doing right.

And in that moment, before I knew it, I hit the refrigerator and started yelling at the top of my lungs at the woman that I'm supposed to protect and love. And right before my eyes, I saw her spirit just dwindle down. And at that moment, the most I said, you need some work. You haven't released all that you've been through, and as a result, it's affecting where you are. And so at that moment, because we were about to get separated, and I chose to say, you know what?

I'm going to deal with what's been going on inside of me so that I can heal. And so that was the pivotal point where I started my journey to comprehensive manhood. Thank you. Thank you. How about you, sir? How about you?

I'm still trying to recover from what my brother just said right here. Thank you for having me. Of course. I like to start things off. I'm old school. I like to be formal. Thank you. Thank you for having me on your stage and your platform.

Thank you to Charlemagne. Yes, brother. Charlemagne, the God for doing this. Thank you to Charlemagne. Charlemagne. Yes, brother. Charlemagne, the God for doing this. Thank you. You should do this, like, for real in real life because you, yeah, some of the shit you do on your show... Oh, my God. ...compromises the mental health, and then he's like, well, hey,

I'm gonna compromise your mental health, then put a Band-Aid on it and do a conference. We'll talk about that later. I'm going to compromise your mental health, then put a Band-Aid on it and do a conference. We'll talk about that later. I came here to have some fun because I've got enough crying videos on the Internet. Oh, Lord. Every time I see Charlamagne, I'm crying. I'm like, this motherfucker.

I'm so happy you ain't on this stage right now. So, to be honest with you, my first, and here's the thing, I think I'm really proud of us. I want to be specific. I'm sure there's a couple white people out here. But I want to be very specific and say that I'm very proud of us as black culture for normalizing the dialogue in and around I'm not okay. Right? for normalizing the dialogue in and around I'm not okay. Amen. Right? Because we have been for years walking, living, breathing time bombs. And the other thing that's very confusing about us,

see, can I talk to y'all because we've grown up here? Can I be? Yes. Okay, all right, because you know I'm crazy know I'm crazy and I'm gonna say exactly what I feel see when we in the hood we see a crackhead right and we know it's a crackhead right if y'all know what I'm talking about don't I don't want like bougie niggas so if y'all know what I'm talking about all right when you see somebody that's strung out on something we know and we recognize them as being strung out on something, right? Alcoholic, drug head, or when we see somebody that's a prostitute, we just like, oh, that's a prostitute.

The problem with most of us is that we work so hard at creating these false perceptions that we're actually okay when we're not. And then social media has made it worse because you can actually cut and paste your relationship. You can put a filter on it. Your nose ain't that small. Okay? So, we have set ourselves up to mask and we are being assisted in masking the way we actually feel. I often say you would not be relationship goals if you upload how often you and your girl is actually arguing.

But you're able to cut and paste out the fact that y'all been sleeping in two different rooms for the last three weeks. Y'all love each other but you don't like each other. You irritate the shit out of me every time you talk. Cringing. And so that's the reality of where we are. So what happens is we create the lie and we live the lie and then we also enjoy the fact

that everybody believe it to be true. But it's a lie the whole time. So for me, without me knowing anything about mental health awareness, I go back to my first book. It's called How to Get Out of Your Own Way. And it's a hit in all of the prisons. Whatever.

My shit got rave reviews on Amazon, too. But How to Get Out of Your Own Way. At first, it was supposed to be called get out of your own way. And then I realized that how to is an invite because if you're in your own way and you don't know that you're on your own way, that you'll see it go get out of your own way. And that's a comment like, OK, well, I'm not in my own way, so I'm not going to read it. How to is an invite for you to be a part of the dialogue and the conversation. And it's raw.

It's uncomfortable. It's unfiltered. I go into everything. Childhood, traumas, alcoholism, you know, mental, emotional, psychological, spiritual abuse, physical abuse. Everything that I've seen and was exposed to in South Central LA, I went all the way, and that's been me this entire time. I forgot what year it came out. It's at least 13 years ago. But before we normalized the dialogue around mental health, I was already on that journey to be transparent because I'm like,

it's cool to get screamed for. It's cool to be looked at as handsome and sexy and songs and movie star and muscles. That's all great. But I really want y'all to know that I'm a real guy and that I really feel things and I carry things. And I want you to look up to me for those reasons outside of the reasons of me having talent and all of the other things that I just mentioned. So that's where my mental health journey started from how to get out of your own way. I love that. Thank you for that. So yeah, yeah, please. Please. So Jason, could you talk a little bit about, I heard a bunch of things in what both you and Tyrese said. and one thing that sticks out to me as a black person

is that I feel like there's so much pressure. There are different kinds of pressure, I think, for men and women. There are different pressures for people. Any marginalized identity you add on top of being black, it's more stress for you, right? And so I wonder if you could talk a little bit about your book, Cry Like a Man, and if there's anything in

there that both you and Tyrese could speak to related to what are those pressures that are on men? Tyrese, you spoke to some of them that prevent them from being able to express and be in touch with those emotions that they carry with them all the time? That's a great question. I've been working with boys specifically since, say 2005 through the Cave of Adullam Transformational Training Academy. And it's the programming starts young. With boys, we tell them big boys don't cry. And then when they get older, no pain, no gain.

That's not a universal principle. If my brother Tyrese and I ever owned an NFL team and our star quarterback injured his Achilles, we wouldn't tell him no pain, no gain, and go back out there. But for men, we've adopted these misleading mantras as universal truths. Do everything in moderation is another one we say

when it takes less than an ounce of cyanide to kill you. And so we've been conditioned to believe that our worth is in what we do and not who we are. And so you wonder why your teenage son is apathetic and just disengaged. You've taught him his entire life not to express his emotions. And now you have no idea that he's one day away from committing suicide. And so, Cry Like a Man, my journey started with my grandfather's lynching in 1936.

And I saw directly the effect, the negative effect that trauma has on the brain when you can't release it. My mother and her siblings, I think it was five siblings, all of them except two developed dementia. They could never let go of the trauma. And then if I fast forward past there, my mother's first marriage was very abusive. Her husband used to slap my brothers with the flat sides of butcher knives.

And then in 1973, she married my father in 68. In 1973, my first brother got murdered. So my mother had to deal with that. And then in 1993, my second brother gets murdered. So I saw my mother trying to stay strong as we're conditioned to believe we can be as black people, that we have to be perpetually strong and don't talk to no one. You can deal with it yourself. As a result of that mentality, my mother broke down mentally and had to be admitted to a psych ward.

I share all that to say that growing up as young black boys in our community, the gold standard when I came up in what I call the glory, the golden era of hip-hop, black boys in our community, the gold standard when I came up in what I call the glory, the golden era of hip-hop, the gold standard was the hyper-masculine black male. You couldn't hold your girl's hand, not in my city, without the threat of getting beat down. So to survive in that community or that environment, we had to become hard. We had to become callous. And as a result of that, we die, I believe today because we're an emotionally incarcerated group of men, we are at higher risk of suicide. We commit the most homicides.

And yet we still wear it as a badge of honor to suffer in silence. And so the subtitle, To Cry Like a Man, is fighting for freedom from emotional incarceration and emotional incarceration it appears to be a safe place but it's a self-imposed imprisonment mental imprisonment where a man isolates his heart from the world and we've been conditioned that way from childhood even now as men even drake says in one of his songs, I pop bottles because I bottle my emotions. And we'll be in a club like this, but we don't realize what that man just said. And as a result of repressing our emotions,

we increase our chances of developing cancer by 70%. And then high risk behavior as far as dying from premature, dying of a premature death by 30%. And as a result of our boys being emotionally incarcerated, I work with them, they can't express their fears. They're taught to be fearless when no man I know in here is fearless. If you don't have fear, you can't be courageous. And if you have children, that's like your heart walking outside your body. And I don't know one good father here who doesn't fear anything happening to their children. So as a result, thank you.

Lastly, as a result, I teach young boys it's okay to feel fear but never succumb to it. So when you give a boy, especially a man like me and brother Tyrese H who have broken boys still inside of us that need more healing, when you allow us the freedom to feel we stop hiding behind this facade as brother Tyrese said and we can break down all of those barriers and actually stop intergenerational trauma and start intergenerational healing amen my God. Thank you for that. You want to add anything to it? Okay.

We're not touching that. I hear you. All right. Can I say something? Yeah, go ahead, please. First and foremost, you know, I got love for you, man. And this brother reached out to me when Cry Like a Man came out and he without me asking promoted it on his social media 2018 yeah something happened to my brother recognized talent this man got talent so something happened to my brother where he courageously had a moment in front of the world

where he cried and shared his pain. And it's extremely hypocritical that in one voice we complain about a narrative that isn't even accurate, that black men aren't there for their children, because the CDC reported that black fathers are more active than any other ethnicity with their children.

But the fact that there's a man, a black man, on social media of his stature, having a breakdown crying, not over a Super Bowl trophy, not over an NBA championship, not over none of that, but the fact that he can't spend time with his daughter and the society at large mocks him. So I'm real big on like talking, that's faith in action works. So I would like to ask everyone in here, because I'm sure all of us have been guilty of not even condemning those who may have even laughed

at that moment of transparency that my brother had and so I'm real big on resolving trauma because like he said he is human I've talked to him I won't share some of the things he's told me but we have to understand

that hurts us. I was talking to men all out here today, angry because they can't be with their kids and everything else going on. I said, brother, you're not angry. You're hurt. You're sad. You're depressed. You're frustrated. You're disheartened. Anger is a surface emotion. We express that easily. But when we teach, I teach boys to dig deep and men to dig deep and express what I call the hyper-sensory emotions before the emotional earthquake happens. So if everyone with me, I want to say it together. Brother, I'm sorry for not even standing up for you. In that moment, as a black black man seeing you vulnerable.

Honestly, I should have dog checked anybody I saw who tried to talk about you or humiliate you because I've been doing youth work since 2003. And to see a father cry with your stature, your popularity, and just want to release it and your grief was to be with your daughter because you couldn't be, I just want to publicly commend you for that. And really, give it up for Tyrese, straight up.

You do deserve it, man. Seriously. Take it in. Take it in. Take it in. It's for you. So Charlamagne trying to set me up to cry again? This is crazy. This is crazy.

I should have stayed at home, man. Don't I got enough crime videos out here, Charlamagne? But it's real talk, my brother. No, no, I receive it. And because this clock, this clock is stressing me out right here. Whoever's running this clock, I think y'all got this wrong. There's no way y'all can have us two, us three up here talkative communicators and this clock says 11 minutes and 20 so this is wrong Somebody's got to go ahead and rewind this thing man. Come on up here man to fix this clock man. This is this is not right

Yeah, I'm serious my got some stuff to say. My God. My God. My God. So, yeah, yeah, I'm ball-headed. Ball-headed. That happened. This brother's been having my beard now for like 12 years. It's crazy. I'm waiting on him to send it back. So I want you to know that I receive the love that you just gave my brother. From father to father, that means the world to me, that you would pour into me and validate me. You've done this for me privately outside of doing it on a stage in front of the audience, and I want you to know how much it means to me

because how do you inspire the uninspired? How do you motivate the unmotivated? You have to use your voice, your stage, and your platform to recognize that what they're doing is not motivated by money. It is a selfless act to give of your time, your energy, and be fully present, especially with a bunch of boys that aren't your own. But you make them your own by saying, whether you have a father or not, a big brother or not, I'm going to be all of these things and try my best to be used to keep you motivated and encouraged

because we all get robbed of reaching our full potential when we don't have anybody standing in front of us to say keep going. Now, I want to speak to, I want to pivot really quick because I could use these 13, the clock ain't stopped yet, I'm concerned. I want to use these 13 minutes to try my best to encourage somebody. And I want y'all to really receive what I'm about to say because I came here with a message. If I had to ask y'all, anybody in here, I don't want nobody to Google it, look it up, but just

one person in here, just do me a favor, by a show of hands, can you tell me what was Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.'s net worth when he was assassinated on the balcony? One person in here. If you can raise your hand. Don't play with me, little man. This is not Instagram. We're not here to win the popularity contest, okay? Can anybody raise their hand and say to me, this is what Dr. Martin Luther King's net worth was when he was assassinated in Memphis, Tennessee? Okay.

Can anybody tell me the size of his rims on his car? Can anybody tell me what type of credit card he had in his wallet? Anything? How about the square footage of his house? Okay, the point I'm making is none of that shit matters. Okay? So, the calculated distraction that I want to speak to is we are all out here focused on the wrong shit.

Y'all spent more time getting dressed this morning than reading the Bible, reading a book, or trying to come up with a plan that can help change the community that you're complaining about every single day. The laws are the laws because they know how to get together and change everything about what they have a problem with. They will buy up all this gentrification. That is not a random concept that's actually happening. And the gentrification is happening where we as black and brown culture lay our heads. But they come up with a plan and they figure out how to push us out and we're just bitching and moaning and complaining the whole time while it's happening right in front of us.

So I really want y'all to understand that it does not take a thousand people to change anything. It just takes one person to actually make a commitment to change their neighborhood or their community, and then things change. The reason I'm pointing out Dr. King, I know he was a civil rights leader and everything that we know about him, but in my mind, Dr. King was the unexpected hero.

This was a man that went to Montgomery, Alabama, because he was a pastor at Ebenezer in Atlanta, but his father, Dr. Martin Luther King, I'm sorry, Martin Luther King Sr. was the senior pastor at Ebenezer in Atlanta. Dr. King wanted his own church. The first time he became a senior pastor was in Montgomery, Alabama. Then there was a black woman that says to the white man, my feet is hurting and I'm not going to the back of the bus. So he got thrusted into an unexpected civil rights journey, did the bus boycott, and then

everything happened. Some of y'all do well on Instagram, speaking up and speaking out about things that matter, but you're not doing anything in real life. You all in the comments, you writing your captions, you vocal and outspoken. You in your Malcolm X bag on Instagram, but you ain't doing shit other than posting. So the reason that I am as vocal and outspoken about the family law court system, because I'm going to Congress. See? As a kid, I really do remember having these dreams and visions, but you just don't know what is going to come for you.

Alicia Keys opens up about conquering doubt, learning to trust herself and leaning into her dreams. I think a lot of times we are built to doubt the possibilities for ourselves. For self-preservation and protection, it was literally that step by step. And so I discovered that that is how we get where we're going. This increment of small, determined moments. Alicia shares her wisdom on growth, gratitude, and the power of love. I forgive myself. It's okay. Like grace. Have grace with yourself. You're trying your best and you're going to figure out the rhythm of this thing. Alicia Keys, like you've never heard her before. Listen to On Purpose with Jay Shetty on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever

you get your podcasts. What's up, y'all? This is Questlove, and I'm here to tell you about a new podcast I've been working on with the Story Pirates and John Glickman called Historical Records. It's a family-friendly podcast. Yeah, you heard that right. A podcast for all ages. One you can listen to and enjoy with your kids starting on September 27th. I'm going to toss it over to the host of Historical Records, Nimany, to tell you all about it. Make sure you check it out. Hey, y'all. Nimany here.

I'm the host of a brand new history podcast for kids and families called Historical Records. Historical Records brings history to life through hip-hop. Flash, slam, another one gone. Bash, bam, another one gone. The crack of the bat and another one gone. brings history to life through hip-hop. Each episode is about a different, inspiring figure from history. Like this one about Claudette Colvin, a 15-year-old girl in Alabama who refused to give up her seat on the city bus nine whole months before Rosa Parks did the same thing.

Check it. And it began with me Did you know, did you know I wouldn't give up my seat Nine months before Rosa It was Claudette Goldman Get the kids in your life excited about history by tuning in to Historical Records.

Because in order to make history, you have to make some noise. Listen to Historical Records on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Hey, guys, I'm Kate Max. You might know me from my popular online series, The Running Interview Show, where I run with celebrities, athletes, entrepreneurs, and more. After those runs, the conversations keep going. That's what my podcast Post Run High is all about. It's a chance to sit down with my guests and dive even deeper into their stories, their journeys, and the thoughts that arise once we've hit the pavement together.

You know that rush of endorphins you feel after a great workout? Well, that's when the real magic happens. So if you love hearing real, inspiring stories from the people you know, follow, and admire, join me every week for Post Run High. It's where we take the conversation beyond the run and get into the heart of it all. It's lighthearted, pretty crazy, and very fun. Listen to Post Run High on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Hey, everyone. This is Courtney Thorne-Smith, Laura Layton, and Daphne Zuniga. On July 8, 1992, apartment buildings with pools were never quite the same as Melrose Place was introduced to the world. It took drama and mayhem to an entirely new level. We are going to be reliving every hookup, every scandal, every

backstab, blackmail, and explosion, and every single wig removal together. Secrets are revealed as we rewatch every moment with you. Special guests from back in the day will be dropping by. You know who they are. Sydney, Allison, and Joe are back together on Still the Place with a trip down memory lane and back to Melrose Place. So listen to Still the Place on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen to podcasts. Haunting is back, dropping just in time for spooky season. Now I know you've probably been wandering the mortal plane, wondering when I'd be back to fill your ears with deliciously unsettling stories. Well, wonder no more, because we've got a ghoulishly good lineup ready for you. Let's just say things get a bit extra.

We're talking spirits, demons, and the kind of supernatural chaos that'll make your spooky season complete. You know how much I love this time of year. It's the one time I'm actually on trend. So grab your pumpkin spice, dust off that Ouija board. Just don't call me unless it's urgent. And tune in for new episodes every week. Remember, the veils are thin, the stories are spooky, and your favorite ghost host is back and badder than ever.

Listen to Haunting on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. I am currently assembling not just fathers, mothers as well. Because a lot of women in this audience, you make way more money than your man, and he at the house playing video games and delivering hot penis. And as soon as y'all break up, he gonna try and come get half of your shit just the way I'm dealing with it. So y'all gotta understand that the reality of what happens in that courtroom when you show up and you're dealing with a divorce, alimony, child support payments and all the

above, I'm not just on Instagram going at my exes. I'm going at the family law court system. I've tried to get the judge thrown off the bench twice. So these are not tears in vain. I'm in motion. What do you have a problem with? What do you have a problem with? I'm asking.

What do you have a problem with? If you don't have a problem, shut up. But if you actually have a problem with four million black men being in jail and every time you are an alpha male you get pinged with toxic masculinity because they trying to normalize gay. Do you have a problem? They're selling women what to do with their bodies. Do you have a problem?

I'm not here to tell you to vote Republican or Democrat. That ain't my job. I'm going for Kamala. Oh, Kamala. I did that on purpose. Don't, don't. I did that on purpose. Anyway, y'all know what I'm talking about.

I did that on purpose. Shut up.'all know what I'm talking about. I did that on purpose. Shut up. Kamala, that's right. That's right. That's right. Get it right. Get it right. So I'm just saying, like, we have a problem, but how much of a problem do you have?

See, this brother right here had a problem with what's happening with black boys. And he went above and beyond and he does it every single day, whether the cameras is rolling or not. What do you have a problem with? Nothing changes because you're at home complaining and sitting on your hands. It only changes when you get in motion. Come on, y'all. Dr. Martin Luther King, Malcolm X, Medgar Evers, like, we can keep going. The movement only happens with movement.

What are we doing? It does not take a thousand people. If only one person in this room decides, you you know what man? I do have a problem with It changes everything voter suppression What are you gonna do about the fact that they manipulate in all these machines and people are out here working hard to create new Crips new bloods new gangsters new murderers niggas know how to load guns

faster than they could ever learn math and take away and subtraction. Do you have a problem, or are you just going to be like, man, they over there wiling, and then everything stays the same? So I'm just letting y'all know, and I don't need nobody to encourage me to do this.

I live this family law court system shit every day. I'm at 15 million dollars fighting to see my daughters. 15. That's legal fees, that's movies, albums and projects and concerts that have my name on it that went away because I woke up to the news that I was arrested or whatever I'm being accused of. You think Disney wants to hire me after I get accused of some shit that I didn't do? That's money that had my name on it that went away. And then I got to go hire lawyers to protect me and then they trying to hit me over the head for legal fees

to protect her while she's accusing me of some shit. And I'm not going at women. I'm going at lying women. Let's be clear. For every baby mom in the audience who would never take their man to court, raise your hand. See, it's a cool... Look at that.

Look, see something. Oh, God, let me sit down. It was only like 12 hands up in here. God damn, they trying to get the bag in New York, huh? I said, raise your hand. Raise your hand. I'm about to put my Dr. King voice. Raise your hand if you'd never take your man to court.

It was seven of y'all up in here. Yep. about to put my Dr. King voice. Raise your hand if you never take your man to court. It was seven of y'all. Yep. Pretty much. Pretty much. So we're going to close out. Yeah, the clock is wrong, but we with that clock. They didn't fix this clock yet? But I will, before I give you two gentlemen the last word,

the whole point was really for you all to talk and me to just facilitate. One thing I'll say, and then I ask you to give us your closing thoughts, anything you want to leave the audience with. And the one thing I will say is what's really important, you said stand up when you believe in something. One thing that's really important to me is as black people, we all have to rise together. And let me say what I mean.

That means those of us who are black from any part of the diaspora, we had a sister appear today today say she was Caribbean. That includes them. We have African immigrant brothers and sisters. That includes them. We have those of us who identify as African American from the legacy of enslavement. That includes us. And as my brother said, it includes all of us as women along with our brothers, black

men, our kings and princes. And it includes folks with us as women along with our brothers, black men, our kings and princes, and it includes folks with other marginalized identities. Black queer folks as well. Black people with disabilities as well. It's all of us. So if we don't all rise, what's the point? So with that, what I just want to leave us with, I don't want to be up here talking. Everybody who knows me knows I love to talk. But these two here, that's not my role today. My role is just facilitation. So I will ask you two gentlemen, in these closing, the clock is wrong, two minutes and 45 seconds, what would you like to leave the audience with? Any parting words? And I didn't get to ask my question, but I'm just going to put it in. Something I want y'all to take with you.

Do we as black people, men, women, and other, do we know how to receive love? I just want you to hold on to that. We didn't get to that today. But your closing words, gentlemen. Since that's really a negative at the clock. Your, I I guess question about do we really love ourselves

I'm just recalling every conversation I had today with all the men who came up to me and I would have to say that's the common theme we're so quick to basically surrender the blessings that we have over one moment, and it's all centered around because we don't see the real value

in who we are. For me to break free from emotional incarceration and have the marriage that I have, the life that I have, I don't work for any of this. I work for my home. Everything that I have, my affirmation comes from my wife, my daughter, my son, but none of that, and of course the most high, but none of that could have happened if I didn't start loving myself.

My brothers, I'm gonna be transparent with you. The reason it's hard for you to say vulnerable or vulnerability is because the word itself doesn't really convey what we're asking or what we need to do. If I had an AK-47 and I was shooting a gun in here, the news would say he shot his gun at vulnerable citizens, people who are in danger of getting hurt or wounded or killed. We're trying to tell you to have emotional openness, to be transparent with your emotions and what you're dealing with. My wife would touch me, brothers, and I would cringe because I didn't understand why she was caressing me. How do you love me that you rubbing my scalp? And many of us, if we real with ourselves, that Superman cape we try to wear every day

is strangling the life out of us. I got a call this morning from a successful person that you know his wife is considering to leave and he cannot convey and release the childhood trauma to her so that she can understand at least why he cannot communicate. He's been conditioned by his trauma and abuse to not love himself. So I'm telling you, the way to break free and start this journey to healing is to first stop seeking for love everywhere else and look in the mirror. Resolve it there. And as Brother Tyrese passionately conveyed, I'm just one person. God says, I don't need an army.

I need one boy, one stone, one sling to take down the giant I got before you. But I couldn't do it until I was real with myself and got the healing. More resources than ever are being poured into our communities. Why isn't it working? Seas are falling on unfertile ground. The ground needs to be broken up. The hardness of our heart, what our ancestors had to deal with, they had to stay and fight or flight, y'all.

We don't. We're free to find healing. My father probably would have lived a longer life if he could have been here. Love yourself. It sounds simple, but it's the greatest thing you could do because when I started loving myself, I genuinely started loving my wife. I started treating my daughter the way I longed to be treated as a son. I started communicating with my son instead of always having to resort to yelling and just calmly just saying, son, why did you do that? What caused you to think that way? That's how my son grew. And then lastly, because I'm healed, I can heal the thousands of boys that I touch every day. And so I just close with that.

Crying like a man is more than shedding tears. Just so you know, tears release stress hormones that get excreted from your body when you cry. That's why you typically feel better when you cry. All right? But it's not just about that. It's about releasing the trauma and emotional pain that's been stored in your heart for years. Release it and be free.

Stop allowing your trauma to time travel so that you can fully live in the present. Period. Do you have anything? Y'all gotta give some more love to my brother for that one right there. My God. It's like when this man starts talking, man, I start traveling somewhere in my head. I left the room and then I came back. But I'm going to do this. I'm tired

of this shit right here. Oh my God. You set us up, Charlamagne. How you going to have us to come up here and do this and then put a clock on us like that? That thing is aggressive. Every time we're not looking at it, somebody is speeding it up too, man. Man, I'm taking this home.

Well, I'm going to wrap it up by saying I know I'm supposed to encourage y'all, say something motivational, inspirational. But I'm going to close this out by telling y'all what I'm here to do. Because I don't do charity. I believe in giving back, not just financially, with my time, my energy. When y'all see me writing them long captions on Instagram, I don't have people at my house. I like to put my thoughts and my feelings out there in the world, hoping that somebody

out there to see it, be able to relate to it. But I'm going to tell y'all what I'm here to do. I'm here to change things. I'm here to normalize the dialogue that black men cry. We are vulnerable. When an abortion happens or a miscarriage happens, you skip over us. I've never had a miscarriage or an abortion, obviously,

in my house or my family or my marriage. That's not something I've ever experienced, but I know plenty of men who have experienced it. I came here with one today, a stillborn. He did not want to live anymore after experiencing it. He's the best father of two supermodel daughters. And he's my brother, my Capricorn brother. He's a Muslim man, strong, alpha, everything that we represent. But at what point did something happen so bad where what you're feeling and carrying gets overlooked because everyone normally gravitate towards the woman

and what she needs as if we're not feeling that exact thing. We may be out of jail, but have you asked the question, what has happened to you mentally, emotionally, psychologically from your experience in being incarcerated? You may be out, but are you still carrying the things that affected you from living in constant fear every single day? You may not be in the foster care system anymore, but what did you see?

What did you hear? What did you see? What did you hear? What did you experience? Does your molestation matter as a man? How many more Catholic priests are they going to announce that molested boys? And just maybe all of these Catholic priests would be in jail if they were all women that these Catholic priests were molesting. See, I am unafraid and unapologetic about being vulnerable, honest, vocal, and outspoken. That's who I am. That's what it's been because I realized quickly I may not ever get to a level of Elon Musk money. I live in something nice. I drive something nice, but I've never desired I love you because

of your car. I want you to love the person that's in the car and then give a compliment to the car after. That's a good brother in there. It's all in the way it lands for you. So I'm going to tell y'all, I am a multi-billionaire. Some of y'all ain't happy for me. I am a multi-billionaire. My life and my career started with a 30-second commercial. I am the walking, living, breathing manifestation of God's favor. Right here.

Find somebody else who started their career with a 30 second commercial that turned into 30 years. You may laugh, you may make a mockery. I might be posting some silly shit, I laugh at me too. But you cannot question God's favor. Because if it's about talent, why hasn't everybody else who did a 30-second commercial have that to go and turn into $10 billion in box office? Sell all these records.

Go by one name. Just one. Just one. That's how we be. Insecure people will look at this as bragging and flexing. I'm not here to tell y'all my Wikipedia page. I'm telling y'all that I'm different. And I came here to change things.

I came here to normalize things that ain't normal. I came here to change things. And I'm not done. What did you come here to do? You do understand that this place is going to stay the same unless you change it. Did y'all hear that? I have a problem with, finish your sentence.

Do you have a problem with it, or are you willing to do whatever it takes to change it? I came here to change things. I will be opening a movie studio that will have hotels, restaurants, retail, car dealerships, all of the above. I'm going to do it. And one of you niggas is going to give me the money to do it, too. I have a problem with the things that I have a problem with. These are the things that keep me up at night. And I want to close this out with this, man.

Please, God, thank you for everything. God, I do not take these stages and these platforms for granted. You could have anybody on this stage. Charlemagne knows everybody. He could have had anybody here. So somebody, I hope and I pray that we have been able to say something that can change a life. Just one. It doesn't have to be the whole room.

Some of y'all are so used to going to church and screaming hallelujah, and you go right back to doing the same shit. When I am in the presence of somebody that drops something on me that falls directly into my soul everything about that moment for me changes I don't care listen there is nobody in this room that can purchase me into feeling differently because my soul is not for sale as a matter of fact most people with money irritate the shit out of me.

That's why I don't hang around with celebrities. I connect to and relate to regular folks. Now, with that being said, I'm going to close it out with this, y'all. I want to tell y'all something about the fire in my belly. I want to be specific about the fire in my belly. They always say hell is hot. And they turn the fire and the desire into a negative. I wake up every single day and literally what keeps me up at night are the dreams and the visions.

I tell people I dream with my eyes open. I want to become the things I see. and the visions, I tell people I dream with my eyes open. I wanna become the things I see. When somebody say something or expose me to something, I'm like, man, what is that? I never dreamt that. I was able to see it, hear it, or be exposed to it after I woke up.

Or I shook a hand and somebody made me aware of something that was going on. The fire and desire in your stomach is a sign and an indication that that's something that you're supposed to do. The things that keep you up at night, it could be the way that things is happening in the community with the prisons and the jail and the excessive force and the murder and all of the things that stress you out.

Those are the things that God continue to show you so that you can take the initiative to change things. A movement doesn't happen without movement. What do you have a problem with? What do you want? And if you decide to not do it, you're going to sit back and you're going to watch me do it because I'm not waiting on none of y'all because I understand the assignment and that nothing changes unless you change it. So I'm going to ask y'all to do me a favor. Don't just go to another

conference. Don't be screaming and yelling and we not about to pass out no basket for no offering. Only thing you need to know is that you could have been anywhere in any city, state, and country and you came here because someone that you're in a relationship with, every time you mention

that clothing idea, hair, makeup, the hair salon, any real estate, tech, any time you mention anything to this person, this negative-ass dream killer is shooting down your ideas, and you laying up in bed with the venom right there. Pull the covers back. That's a snake.

There is nobody I'm ever going to date that's going to stop me from the things that keep me up at night so you look at your grab your stomach sometime when you're in the mirror and ask God what is in my stomach that's that's that's burning that's keeping me up at night that I truly desire that's what we want and if you don't get it done, watch me. I will. Because I don't feel bad for nobody. Either you're going to get it done or it won't be done.

But don't get mad at niggas that's out here getting it done. God bless you. Thank you. Can we make sure? You are hilarious. You're a mess. Yay! All right.

Yeah, he's going to get a picture of all of us. Want to thank you all for coming out today. Yes. Want to thank you all for coming out today. We'll be here next year. I'm glad we could create a safe space for Tyrese to get all that coming out today. Yes. I want to thank you all for coming out today. We'll be here next year. I'm glad we could create a safe space for Tyrese to get all that off his chest. Thank you for coming, Tyrese.

Really do appreciate you all. And you know, this is a day of mental health education and healing and everything that everybody's been saying on this stage is true. What Tyrese said is very true. We hope that you came out here today and you feel encouraged to either continue on your healing journey or to get started on your healing journey. And I really want to say from the bottom of my heart, thank you all for coming out today. And we'll see you all again next year at the fifth annual Mental Wealth Expo. I just want to thank iHeartRadio one time, and I got to thank this queen right here, Dr. Alfie Breland Noble.

None of this happens without her. I mean, absolutely nothing. So thank you, Dr. Alfie. Thank you. Thank you for recording. Hello, hello. Hey, Charlamagne, I didn't know you was this short, bro. Because you're always behind the table sitting down on the breakfast club. This is crazy. I didn't know you was this short, bro. Because you're always behind the table

sitting down on the breakfast club. This is crazy. I'm actually taller than him. Did y'all have fun today? God bless y'all. Y'all know what to do, right? Y'all know what to do, as a kid i really do remember having these dreams and visions but you just don't know what is going to come for you alicia shares her wisdom on growth gratitude and the power of love i forgive myself it's okay have grace for yourself you're trying your best and you're gonna figure out the rhythm of this thing. Alicia Keys, like you've never heard her before. Listen to On Purpose with Jay Shetty on the

iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Hey, y'all. Nimany here. I'm the host of a brand new history podcast for kids and families called Historical Records. Executive produced by Questlove,

The Story Pirates, and John Glickman, Historical Records brings history to life through hip-hop. Flash, slam, another one gone. Bash, bam, another one gone. The crack of the bat and another one gone. The tip of the cap, there's another one gone. Each episode is about a different, inspiring figure from history.

Like this one about Claudette Colvin, a 15-year-old girl in Alabama who refused to give up her seat on the city bus nine whole months before Rosa Parks did the same thing. Check it. And it began with me. Did you know, did you know? I wouldn't give up my seat. Nine months before Rosa, it was called a moment. Get the kids in your life excited about history by tuning in to Historical Records.

Because in order to make history, you have to make some noise. Listen to Historical Records on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Hello, my undeadly darlings. It's Teresa, your resident ghost host. And do I have a treat for you. Haunting is crawling out from the shadows, and it's going to be devilishly good. We've got chills, thrills, and stories that'll make you wish the lights stayed on. So join me, won't you?

Let's dive into the eerie unknown together. Sleep tight, if you can. Listen to Haunting on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Hey guys, I'm Kate Max. You might know me from my popular online series, The Running Interview Show, where I run with celebrities, athletes, entrepreneurs, and more. After those runs, the conversations keep going. That's what my podcast, Post Run High, is all about. It's a chance to sit down with my guests and dive even deeper into their stories, their journeys,

and the thoughts that arise once we've hit the pavement together. Listen to Post Run High on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Hi, I'm Dani Shapiro, host of the hit podcast, Family Secrets. How would you feel if when you met your biological father for the first time, he didn't even say hello? And what if your past itself was the secret and the time had suddenly come to share that past with your child? These are just a few of the powerful and profound questions

we'll be asking on our 11th season of Family Secrets. Listen to season 11 of Family Secrets on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.