The Breakfast Club - Nicole Avant On Her Father's Wisdom, The Story Of 'The Six Triple Eight', Purpose, Peace +More

Episode Date: February 7, 2025

Nicole Avant On Her Father's Wisdom, The Story Of 'The Six Triple Eight', Purpose, Peace +MoreSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Black History Month is here and we're excited to kick off season foe of I Didn't Know, Maybe You Didn't Either. This season, we're shining a spotlight on revolutionary women who redefined excellence. Give Grace Wisher her flowers. Next time you see the American flag, you just remember a 16-year-old black woman helped to make it happen. Listen to I Didn't Know, Maybe You didn't either. From the Black Effect Podcast Network, on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcast, or simply wherever you get your podcasts.

I Didn't Know. Calling all Yellowstone fans. Let's go to work. Join Bobby Bones on the official Yellowstone podcast for exclusive cast interviews, behind the scenes insights, and a deep dive into the themes that have made Yellowstone a cultural phenomenon. Our family legacy is this ranch.

And I protect it with my life. Listen to the official Yellowstone podcast now on the iHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Hey, I'm Jay Shetty and my latest episode is with Bill Gates. This is a world where somebody can have over a hundred billion dollars. What is that? Social networking, we're still arguing about what the policy should be, algorithms reward outrageous things.

These fortunes are almost illegitimate unless in a very smart way given back. Listen to On Purpose with Jay Shetty on the iHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts. Hey, it's Alec Baldwin. This past season on my podcast, Here's the Thing, I spoke with more actors, musicians, policymakers and so many other fascinating people, like writer and actor Dan Aykroyd. I love writing more than anything. You're left alone. You do three hours in the morning,

you write three hours in the afternoon, go pick up a kid from school, and write at night. And after nine hours, you come out with seven pages, and then you're moving on. Listen to Here's the Thing on the iHeart radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Morning everybody, it's DJ Envy, Jess Hilarious, Charlamagne the Guy, we are the Breakfast Club, Lauren LaRosa is hanging out with us this morning.

Yes indeed. And we got a special guest in the building. Yes. We have Nicole Avon. Welcome. Thank you. Welcome back. Thank you. It's good to be back. How you feeling? Great.

New book. New book. New I mean, new film, new forward. New forward. Everything's new. Thank God. It's a it's so yeah, the paperback version of Think You'll Be Happy is now out. And my husband, Ted Sarandos, wrote The Forward. And it is a beautiful addition to the book. And it became a bestseller again

and I'm just so happy because the legacy continues but it's through Ted's lens which was great because Ted was with my father, with the Black Eyed Father when he crossed over to the other side and it was really Ted, like I had left the room and said to Ted, we're going to switch places now. And, and the crazy thing is, is the six triple eight was the last moment I had with my father.

Tyler Perry had just sent me one of the last, um, you know, cuts of the film. And he said, okay, take some notes. We're ready to lock. And my father was in the other room. And I thought, and I was saying, Oh, I don't want to bother him and I could just feel Holy Spirit saying what do you mean bother him? Go sit with him. So I said daddy here's the movie that you told me to finish here's the movie and he's laying there and he's gets all the way to the end and the song the journey is playing and Diane Warren wrote the song

her things the song beautifully it just got nominated nominated, by the way, for an Oscar. And I was able to look at my father. After everything's done, of course, crying and I went over to him. And that's when I said my goodbye. Wow. I was like, you know what, Daddy? You've had the best journey. You journeyed here for 92 and a half years. You've done so much for your people. You've done so much for your people.

You've done so much for America. You've done so much for the world. You can go be a piece now. You you what a journey. What a journey. Any response or anything? He just he he did. He he he get he opened his eyes and there was a slight smile.

But I saw the piece come over him because I kept saying, Daddy, don't hang out for me. I know you want it. Everything's done. The book is done. The film is done. Remember, because he had said to me after my mom died, after she was killed, I didn't want to finish anything. Why would you? So I'm thinking I'm done. And my father every day, you're going to finish that book. You're're gonna finish this movie, life goes on. You have to, of course you need to grieve, of course you're gonna be sad, but you can't give your power away,

you can't give your light away, you can't, this darkness came into our life, you can't be consumed by the darkness. You better take this light and figure this shit out and be an avante. And this is what we do. He's like, you know how hard my life was? You know what I went through?

I was picking cotton at five. I was picking tobacco at five. I was doing this. I was bounced around. I was this. So it was, and he said, he goes, and you owe us that. You kind of owe us your life. You can't let your life force go.

So all that to say, it took three years for me to be sitting here now in a much different, more peaceful. Absolutely. Position of healing. You know, grief never goes away, but it does get lighter as you go, because you learn how to manage it.

Last time I was here, you know, right, you know, right after the hardcover came out, I was still in a state of shock and sadness. However much I was trying to hide it, I was still shaking inside. That's right. Why did you leave the room? Why did you intend to switch places?

Because I said I could tell my father didn't wanna leave in front of me. Well, first of all, I heard, I don't know if you guys have experienced, but it's called the death rattle where you hear, it sounds like someone's choking. It's not, you know, it's scary. It's that rattle where the body is actually shutting down.

And so he's trying to breathe. Harder to breathe. And it's just so painful. So I knew, and I could tell though, that he's trying to hang on. I was like, daddy, daddy, you can go, I'm gonna be okay. I'm gonna be okay. So I said, let me, I'm gonna go get a glass of water.

And then I went out and looked at Ted. I said, you know what, maybe you should go in now and say your goodbyes and then we'll do it together. And then the next thing, and then I just knew once Ted went in, he was gonna be different. And he was, Ted played music. Ted, all was Ted played music Ted, all of a sudden, Ted said, all of a sudden at all my,

I was the little Catholic boy again in school. And he goes, and I started saying my prayers because I hadn't said them in years, but they listened to Duke Ellington, Quincy Jones, Frank Sinatra, everybody. They just, he played, he sent Clarence out, held his hand, and he they had their beautiful moment because, you know, they were very, very close.

And my father and Ted's dad didn't understand really what Ted did did for a living. He grasped it, but he didn't really. But my father was like, wait a minute, you're what at Netflix? And what is Netflix going to do? And he's my father has watched Ted from 15 years when I came into Ted's life, skyrocket and become CEO. My dad was there during the whole rise, you know, so it was he got this promotion, then he got another promotion and Clarence would sit with them. And then I'd watch him do his numbers thing and write on the paper, you gotta ask for this.

You gotta do this. Where do you wanna see yourself in five years? Who are you hiring? What are you doing? Are you going around the world? It was so great for Ted to have that. Ted had the ultimate cheat code, now that you think about it.

He did, right? He had the ultimate cheat code. You could tap Clarence Avon anytime you want for advice. Right? Yeah. If you don't understand, so you call Clarence Avon. Like that's like a... Yeah, and you know, Ted would say, which you gotta get him on next time.

He's like, how come I'm not at the breakfast club with you? Oh, we love to have Ted on. I know, we're gonna have him next time. But you know what's so funny, you said that, it's because Ted said when he was dating me, he went to lunch with my father. He said, everybody kept coming to the table. And I'm thinking, well, who is this? What is going on? He goes, everybody kept coming to the table. And I'm thinking, well, who is this?

What is going on? He goes, everybody kept coming to kiss the ring. He goes, I knew of him. He said, but I did not understand the impact of him. He said, and I had black people and white people and men and women saying, he changed the course of my life. He changed the direction of my life. He opened this door, he closed this door,

he made sure the contract was right. I mean, it was all of a sudden Ted's thinking this man was one of the architects of the entire entertainment business. Absolutely. And I don't know his name. And my friends don't know his name. And I'm pissed. So Ted went out and was telling everybody, he said, that's why we got to make the Black Godfather. Oh, OK. Yeah, because when I watched that and I heard about the story, I figured you might have

pushed forward more because it's your family's legacy. But your husband happens to be at Netflix. So you have that person there. I mean, not happens. You know what I mean? You can pick up the phone and call him. So you're like, Oh, let's make this work. But hearing that he in real time was like people need to experience this really Reggie Huddland and I had been working on The Black Godfather for so long, or at least talking about it. And it was great because David Geffen a long time ago, my dad kept saying, I'm just going to write a book. I don't want to be in a movie. I'm going to write a book.

And David Geffen's like, no, I'm going to believe that he was right. I said, Dad, if we put this in words, who's, we're gonna talk about all these experiences and all the things that you did. People need to hear Bill Withers say it. People need to hear Hank Aaron tell the story. People need to hear Bill Clinton tell the story. Otherwise, everyone's gonna say,

oh yeah, that really happened. Okay, so it was so great that everyone came together. And then Ted, every time I'd come home and I'd have my little checklist, he's like, you got that person for the dog? I said, yeah. This person said, yes. Yes. Clive Davis is coming on. Yes. Taz, like, oh, no, we're doing this. We we we have to cement this legacy.

And and Ted knew that that's the way my parents raised me. They raised me. They gave me black history mostly through music and film. You know, there was a lot of stuff in the house, of course, the art and things, but my parents would have me watch, you know, a lot of whether it was lilies and the, you know, to serve with love or lilies of the field or, or guess who's coming to dinner, all Sydney Poitier first, you know, and then go to the Dutchman and all these films and Even Birth of a Nation which is horrific to watch but you need to watch it

You need to learn so that you could say That shit was really happening and thank God. It's not Now, but you know what? I mean? Yes,, there was so, it was easier for me to digest history through entertainment, which is why we were able to tell so many stories in The Black Godfather that I don't think would have resonated with people if it was on paper. Separately or on paper, yeah.

Right? Can I read a little bit of what Ted said? Yeah. In the foreword, he said, Nicole's father, my father-in-law, Clarence Avon, the Black Godfather, came directly from the hospital to live with us. The next few years were like a gift from the universe,

cosmic payback for the pain of the few weeks in 2021 that changed all our lives. Clarence was a role model in business and in life. Every meal together was a masterclass, cheating. He didn't say that, I said that. I had spent time with him over the years, heard the stories, witnessed the reverence the world had for Clarence, and met the folks

whose lives were impacted by him. Bill Withers, Hank Aaron, presidents Barack Obama and Bill Clinton, Andrew Young, and countless executives whom he'd created opportunities for and shepherded in his remarkable life and career. He was a man who demanded fairness and justice in a world that was often short on both. He loved music and history and made both.

Spending time together in the last years of his life filled a void for me that the loss of my own father had created. Wow. I hadn't been in time when my father departed, but I was in the room when Clarence did. I mean, yeah. Wow.

I know, I'm already getting like. Well, how are you doing? Yeah. We got tissues. I know, I'm good. I miss him a lot. But I'm really, I feel very blessed to have had a soul like that. I mean, Clarence to me was one of the most powerful souls

I've ever met. I've never met anybody like that. I really haven't. And to know that I, to just feel every single day I feel his presence and just the knowing of this soul raised me and this soul gave me a toolbox. And he that's the best gift he gave me, which was here's a toolbox. All this shit's going to happen in life.

They grab this tool for this. Grab this tool for this. grab this tool for this, the resentment comes, drop it. This comes, you know what I mean? He was able to, he was just such a master of how life works. And he was so big on, you know, his big saying was you come with a number

and you end with a number. And in between, that is your dash. What the F are you going to do with your dash? It's yours. And your choices and your decisions are going to determine your life. Period. Because he said, you've already seen it. It's like Tyler Perry just posted.

I can't repost it because I thought it was so good. We have the blueprint. That's right. We have the blueprint. We have seen everybody, especially in the black race, who has shown us what they did, how they had to go through it, how they overcame things, how they thought about things, how they strategize.

You have a blueprint, but we have to use the blueprint, not just be, you know, be fueled by it. And I just, the times that I, you know, my dad always reminded me, you know, again, everybody is going to leave this earth, Nicole, everybody. That's the one thing we all have in common. Nobody gets a pass. So do as much as you can with your life

and experience as many things and as many people as possible and try to do good and make a difference wherever you are and whatever you do in life, because everybody's important. So when you talk about your father passing, there's a sense of peace. And, you know, you guys got to spend the time. Your mom's situation was a lot different. Yes. And in this book, you talk a lot about that night when everything happened with your mom.

When did you get to a point even where you weren't angry about what happened with your mom? Because did you get to a point even where you weren't angry about what happened with your mom? Because I was I would say there was probably about six months in fairness there. I remember the fourth I remember was April was right before Easter and I had one huge outburst again with one of my father's best friends Al Hammond. I called him and I was furious. I was still screaming, crying, trying to figure things out and everybody was great. Law enforcement was great. Everybody was, we're going to help you. We've got this. But every day I kept forgiving, forgiving, forgiving for myself, not for the person. Didn't condone the behavior, don't condone

violence. I don't condone any of that. But I knew I hate what happened so much that I knew if I got stuck in that hate or stayed in that hate, then I was not going to be able to finish. Think you'll be happy. I was not going to be able to make the six triple A. I wasn't even going to be able to be a good human being because I was going to be a bitter human being. That's what I thought. The demon of the bitterness. Was going to kill me.

I felt like it was strangling me and I was like, no, no, no, no. So I just went through the grief and the grief, you kind of have to carry it with you. It doesn't go anywhere. You carry it with you and then you learn how to manage it. And it does get lighter and lighter, but it gets lighter because I chose to. Let go every day. I had to ask God for grace, ask God for wisdom and guidance, and then say, I cast these burdens.

I'm going to cast the burden of anger. I cast the burden of, of, of resentment and bitterness just so I can move forward, not to condone the behavior, but just so I wanna move forward in my life. I wanna live my life. I was gonna ask about the movie. I know we talked about it, we breezed over it a little bit, but let's get into the movie a little bit as well,

because that's on streaming on Netflix, the 6888. So break down the movie and people are seeing it on Netflix and showing it. I mean, it's, well, I think it's been number two on Netflix globally, which is huge for this type of filming, all black cast, female World War II movie. It was great. Thank you. I learned a lot. It's and that's why I wanted to tell the story.

So the story came to me. It was my fellow producer, Carrie Selig. She's she sent me a sizzle reel. She said, listen, I know that you've probably heard of the six triple eight, but you know, I don't know if you know the whole story, which I didn't. I knew I heard of major charity Adams. I did not know about the battalion. I just didn't.

And I went to my mom. I said, How come you didn't tell me you told me about charity Adams? And she said, I told you about them. You're not remembering, but you must tell this story, Nicole. This is such an important part of American history. And so the story basically is, you know, there's there's all these black women, there's there, you know, a part of the US Army and they're there's 17 pieces, 17 million pieces of mail that have not been delivered to the troops. And no one can do it. Men had tried to do it. Everyone kept trying to do it.

They couldn't get the 17 pieces of mail. So they decided, you know, winking, I will give these black girls. Let's see if they could do it. We'll give them six months. Of course, they did it in three. But everyone's thinking, you know, Tyler, all of us were thinking, Carrie, like, how are we going to tell the story about the male?

But it's not about male. This story is about humanity. This story is about winning the war. This story is about connection. And this story is about resilience and being excellent. That's why I love about these women. This battalion decided to be excellent and they were excellent, even when things were unfair, unkind, not just, not right. They didn't wait for things to be perfect, to be excellent, and to show up strong. And they were patriots and, you know, in a country that really wasn't giving them their flowers or giving them

anything. And they still chose to show up and rise up. And I said, Wait a minute, this story is a great apart, a great part of American history. It's a great part of World War Two history that none of us really knew. And it's great for black women. And I wanted to celebrate these black women. And we had Mrs. King who passed away right before we put out the film but Tyler being Tyler made sure he got the film to her and he watched it with her and she was able to say thank you and she was able to leave this earth knowing that the world was going to know their story. Did Ebony get any time with her? I'm. Yes. Did anybody get any time with her? I'm sorry. Did anybody get any time with Miss King? I think yes. And we all of us for sure did a zoom with her in the very beginning. So she could thank us and we could ask her questions.

And so and I'm I'm not sure if Ebony went to go visit her physically, but I know they spoke and connected. And yeah, there's I think there's two more, maybe two more surviving members. I mean, it's just incredible. I loved the story and full circle moment is my mom. Like I just said, she said, go take you this film. That was three weeks before she died. And then my father is the last thing I showed him.

So for me, this film is extra special because it's a full-sucker moment with my parents. You know, and just, it started with my mom saying, please go do this movie, and it ended with my dad, and you could tell that he was just so happy she did it and put this story out, and this is what, this is what I always wanted you to do. I think the story is that-

Ebony Obsidian, who's an actress in the movie. So people that don't know. Yeah, she played Lena King. Yeah. Her name was Lena, Lena King, right? Yeah, Derrick Houghton, yeah, Lena Derrick Houghton, yeah. I think this movie is so important because, man, when you look at what this administration is doing

and you look at what people are doing all across the country in regards to just trying to erase our history. This might be the only way these stories get told. You know, it's interesting you say that because I think art and film and TV, all of it, I think it's the best way to keep our history alive or all history alive, any history alive, is that's why there's so many movies, I would say,

about World War II and every other war, is it's very important to tell the stories in a very creative way. And that's the one medium that usually brings more people together than not. And that's why these stories have to we have to continue to talk about them. I I'm happy that you know, I always knew the Tuskegee Airmen. And that's why I was so pissed that I know the six triple eight. Yeah. And not taking anything away from the Tuskegee Airmen. But I'm like, well, wait a minute, these black women help win the war too in a different way.

But if you have exactly what Mrs. King said, if you have I mean, Charity Adams, if you have if you have low if you have no mail, there's low morale. And if you have no morale, you, you're not a winner. You can't win. You can't fight for nothing. You're fighting for nothing. You need to know that you have your wife is home waiting for you, your husband, your father,

your mother, your children. You need human connection. There was no email, no wifi, no Facebook, no nothing. They have the US postal service. And that's what I think is so phenomenal of what these women were able to accomplish. And by the way, overseas again, not even going to different states in America, let alone at different different countries. Y'all did a good job of showing that parallel to because the one girl in the movie who her actual like significant other, he went away to the war and she hadn't heard from him. So she was like frustrated.

It really made me feel like I was going to die. I was like, I'm going to die. I'm going to die. I'm going to die. job of showing that parallel to because the the one girl in the movie who her actual like significant other he went away to the war and she hadn't heard from him so she was like frustrated it really showed like why because I was watching it with people who were like but they only doing male to your point but then when you saw her storyline it's like that's why the male was important I think that helps like that overarching storyline helped you understand the importance of their job too I thought that that was a great piece. I don't know if you guys did that on purpose. We did. But thank you for it. Because it's because Tyler was like, we have to really show why.

It actually did happen. But it's to your again, everyone's oh, it's just the mail. But it's really not just anything. It's communication, right? It's humanity. And but we didn't get that until that scene that you're talking about. Yeah. And, and it does make a huge difference that people need to see The power of human connection and the power of your why why is somebody doing something? Why is somebody being so committed? To they were also trying to prove themselves They were also trying to plant seeds again for all of us to be sitting here doing what we're doing You don't have to be in the armed forces. I think people we all have to remember everybody in our history everybody before us

They knew they weren't going to see the fruits of their labor There wasn't you don't mean there were so many people who still Fought for civil rights knowing that they may not get their rights, but we were worth it. Then when we came along, we would have our rights. That is what I respect so much about people who were never going to receive any benefits and still said, I'm doing this because it's the right thing to do. That's right. Y'all were nominated for a best original song too.

Yes. What does that mean? Yes. Oh my gosh. Well, I'll ask her. It's amazing because twofold again, because Clarence comes in here again, because my dad and Diane Warren have been friends forever.

And the fact that it's Diane who wrote the song and then her singing the song, it's so great. But that's what I was able to say to my father when he was passing over. I said, dad, here's your journey, go on your journey. You had such a great journey. I said, and of course guess, here's your journey. Go on your journey. You had such a great journey. I said. And of course, guess who wrote the song? Diane Warren.

I said, your girl who likes to curse just as much as you. That's how they became friends. Because he said, I've never met somebody who drops an F bomb more than me, faster than me. But she's brilliant. Right. She's a brilliant songwriter. And I was just so happy that this is this is the category that we got an Oscar nomination. And I was like, OK, I'll take this because this song is

everything. And the song really makes me I don't know how you felt, but I thought the song was just perfect. It was a lot of good stuff that was intertwined into a song. I think the costuming was great. Isn't that great? I thought that was important to especially when they got off the I'm telling too much about March. No, but the March. Yeah, that was such a powerful silent moment. And I think as a like as a black woman for me, when they were doing that march,

I was like, I feel that because there's a lot of times where you just got to like, you know, like, you're powerful, but you got to let other people assert it for you. And that march was that it was a really good movie. I love that every single test group that we did. The march, it could be white men, black men, Asian women, this, that children. That march, there's nothing is said. Everyone gets moved. People cry before moving around their seats because it stirs up

the underdog in everybody. It's the march. And it's that power of, I know I'm being underestimated, no one believes in me, but I'm about to show you. Yeah. You know, Lauren says something that I want you to expand on Nicole because you are a powerful woman.

You know, she said when you're a powerful woman, you often have to let other people assert it for you. Do you feel that way? I understand that. I do understand that. It's a, you know, it's so funny. I remember being in a meeting once and I looked at this man. He said, well, why are you being, you know, we believe in this exit. You know, I do have a brain and it does function. Just,

I'm just in case you guys didn't know, I do have a functioning brain, but it's true. You go into it's so conditioned by everyone that sometimes people have to go before you and just assert it for you and in a different way. Even when I became ambassador, it was my friend Charlie who said, I said, no, no, no, I don't want to do, I'm doing this. I'm going back in the record business. I know what I like to do, I'm, I'm, I'm doing this. I'm going back in the record business. I know what I like to do. I'm done with this. And he looked at me like, really?

You've outdone so many other people who are demanding to have all these roles and you earned it. And so Charlie said, I'm gonna put your name in just for you. I'm about to do this. And it's interesting how I just didn't even realize that I wasn't really stepping into. Your full you. My full me, my whole life force, my whole thing.

I just didn't realize. You know, and it's, I think we have to just remind ourselves all the time of, of course I'm gonna try, I don't wanna give my half me, I wanna give all of me. And people take it or leave it, but we should all feel comfortable enough with our life force to show up as best we can. And as much as we can not dim our light because it makes other people feel

uncomfortable. I mean, I used to do that a lot growing up. Like, Oh, I don't want to say this. Oh, I don't want to say this. No, there's just, you're just dimming your light for what? And you're taking your energy down to make other people comfortable. And then the only one that's hurt in the end, they don't care if they feel more comfortable or not. And then I feel like shit when I get home because I dimmed myself and I shrunk myself.

Becoming your full you is interesting though because sometimes other people see things in you that you don't see in yourself. 100%. I have to say all the time. Yeah, but I think that sometimes, I think there's a flip side and a good side to that too. I think that there's a, you know, like my father,

for example, I think he saw, he was very good at seeing talent and seeing people that could really change things. And they just, for example, Hank Aaron, I don't think he was you know, insecure. I think he was never just thought of, oh, I should be getting endorsement deals. I just don't think he ever thought of it. And Clarence comes along was like, I don't even know who you are. But if you're about to break, Booth's record you definitely need an

endorsement deal but again my father saw things in people that they sometimes didn't see for themselves and then he made magic for them you know he would always say people tell black people to just run your race run your race and he goes a my thing to everybody is well we can't even get on our marks. Let us get on our mark and then let us run. But if you're gonna take our mark away, don't you dare tell anybody, just run your race. You know, you can't say pull up your boots,

straddle, you don't have boots on. That's right. Stop, you know, get it together. And we have to remind people, but knowing your history, even if you're the only person at the table I always tell people know as much as your history As just know as much as you can so that when you are at a table Or when you're with people that would don't know any of it You could be the one instead of worry about I'm the only black person at this table be so proud

I'm the only black person at this table And then when they're talking about certain inventions and talking about this and that you could say oh well you know this black scientist did this and this black inventor did this and this person did this and they happen to be black and people don't know that and it's it is a superpower that my mom gave me that I have used all my life and it it does feel great just because everybody else doesn't know it doesn't mean that I'm not going to express it. Kind of to your point. Everybody else is talking about it

and their light is up and their vibration's up. And oh, I'm not gonna mention the scientists because they may not know George Washington Carver. They may not know Elijah McCoy or they may not know somebody. Well, I'm just gonna tell them, this is why we say we want the real McCoy. That's right.

And people are like, why? I'm like, well, because, you know, and then you tell the story and then everyone has a, oh, I didn't know. And so that's where the power does come from, knowledge and information. And it is powerful. And to use it in the best way is kind of how we move forward,

especially women, just really knowing everything, who we are and being rooted and grounded in real power versus I always say there's real power and then there's power adjacent. I'm not interested in the power adjacent. I'm not, you know, there there's and that's the pride and we all fall into that too You know, my father says everything that I had I lost it all in one fell swoop You know why? Because I had pride and my ego was too big and then he was able to share that with music and then I was able To pick myself up and I was able to start tabby records and I was able to bring Jimmy Jam and Terry Lewis because all before that, I got to airing it and I, I started doing too many things.

Radio station, this TV show that out of focus lost everything. He goes, and you know, it's like my grandmother used to say, you know, pride cometh before the fall. It just, it does. And to all of us. So we all have to remember to try to stay rooted and grounded, but in real power and God's power in light versus human power. When you're not talking to your dad, do people always say when you lose everything, it makes you a strong individual, right? And that you can't be the person that you need to be unless you lose everything. Did he ever talk about that? Yes, he did. And he, and he felt that he lost a really good he did. And he felt that he lost.

It's a really good question. He felt that he lost everything from a very young age. Because all the time he was being bounced around, moved around, stepfather kicked him out of his house. He was always starting new and losing everything, losing a home, you know, and just starting new. But it does build character. And he'd always say to me, every time,

every time you have a shortcoming in life, every challenge, the real power comes from what's the lesson behind it. You don't wanna learn it in the beginning. You just think, oh my God, they shut the door because of this, oh, this didn't happen. So, but you gotta go behind it and figure out what you, and if you learn the lesson you get to graduate It's like school you get to you know, you read a certain level you get to go the eighth grade

You do this you get to go to high school. It goes, but if you don't learn as you fall Then you'll just stay where you are And he loved the pivot. You know, we say sometimes you have dreams and shit and sometimes The universe is thinking way bigger than you. I have to have this. I have to be on this radio station because God's trying to tell you, you're going to go all the way over here and run the station. But you're so stuck in your one dream.

You have to be able to open your dream up and then be able to pivot. And then at some point, if you keep getting closed doors, just say, maybe I'm supposed to go somewhere else. If I am, he goes, just ask. Maybe, but the pivot, he said, people who aren't successful usually never get the pivot. That's right. He said, they will not pivot.

He goes, I see it all the time. The most successful people, and they end up right flat-lined, because they just won't change. They won't change with the times. They won't change their stubborn ideas I have to be this and he said I just tried everything some of it I was great at some of it

I failed then I figured out what I was good at and just kind of Once he figured out managing was his thing and that's what he was really good at and he can change people's lives That's when he started over and then it was Jimmy and Terry, and then it was L.A. and Faze, and it was Benny Medina, and it was Quizzle. All of a sudden, he's like, this is what I can do. I say that to people all the time. Like, I think folks, they like to say reinvent yourself. No, you just got to know when to pivot.

Pivot. It's not a reinvention. It's just a pivot. It's a pivot, you know? And the beauty as humans is that we're the only animals that can actually do that. You know, so we can change, as soon as you change your mind, think about it. As soon as we change our minds

and as soon as we start thinking different thoughts, speaking a new way, behavior changes, doors open, all of a sudden you're in the right place at the right time with the right people. As soon as you change your mind, my dad always used to say keep your mind right keep your mind right and i knew what he meant is you have to renew it every day your thoughts what do you oh it's never going to work it's never going to work because then why would you expect it to work it's just the science doesn't even the universe doesn't work like that you tell it, it's not gonna work and the universe is gonna be, okay.

I mean, why would it be any way else? It doesn't work like that. Life doesn't work like that. So he just, he said, Nicole, I just rolled. I didn't care anybody color. I didn't care this. I just, my mentors were white. I just rolled.

He said, and none of my mentors thought, oh, he's gonna end up being the black grandfather and he's gonna use all this power that we're giving him to help black people. That was not their intention. He goes, I just got lucky and they picked me and then they let me in and taught me things that gave me connections. And then I chose to go back and try to make a difference for black people. He said, but that was my decision on what to do with what was given to me, not their intention.

You know, the name of this book is Think You'll Be Happy. And it's because of something your mother used to say. Yes, yes. So what is the book about Mr. Avant gonna be titled? I know, you know, okay, it's a true story. And I think I can curse on this show. Of course. So when I wrote Think You'll Be Happy and I told my dad, I said, you know, daddy, I'm saying think you'll be happy because this is mommy's

last message to me. Six hours later, I was heard she was shot. And so he said, maybe it's a later, you know, maybe I should write a book. I should write a book. I should write a Clarence Ava book. I said, well, what was your title be? And he was thinking about it. And then he had watched, I don't know, some I don't know what station. MSNBC, CNN.

So somebody had said on TV was the black person. He said, you know, there's been no progress. 60 years of nothing and on and on. And I'm telling you, my everything and my father is back. When I go, no progress. What? And I say, I'm picking cotton. I'm picking tobacco.

I'm doing this. There were no rights. You can vote. You can do that. He went on and on. I go, OK, but what's the title of your book? And he leans in and he goes, you're fucking welcome. That's the title of my book.

You're fucking welcome by Clarence Ava. I said, oh my God. And he gave me all these isms. Like I have all the Clarence isms written down. And I was like, you know what? I'll do that for you. I'm going to write your book. When?

Now I'm writing it. It's so good of just his little nuggets. It's not going to be long. It's just Clarence-ism, write on it. Next page. Of just real nuggets of how to get through life. His whole thing, remember you know this, it is what it is, now what are you gonna do about it?

And he'd always say, everybody's always like, it is what it is. He goes, no, then you finish the sentence. What are you going to do about it? Make a decision of what you're going to do about whatever it is. And if you're not going to do that, about it, shut the fuck up. That was what he said. Nobody shut the fuck up.

He would always say, if I remember one day I called and I needed advice and I was in the Bahamas and I was so feeling sorry for myself. I said, but daddy, daddy, I'm crying. He goes, it is what it is. And I said, can't you just be sensitive for one minute and just listen to me? I'm trying to explain something. And he said, I said, I know it is what it is, but it hurts me. And he said, OK, what you going to do about it?

I said, but dad, he goes, no, no, no, I'm trying to teach you something. You cannot make a constructive decision in chaos. So when I say, what are you gonna do about it? You gotta accept what is, don't fight what is. Because you don't like it, it's not fair. That's gonna keep you spinning. So it is what it is, accept it, like own it. It's happening.

And then sit with yourself calm yourself down tell yourself I'm in control of my soul as though I'm the guy I control and then make a decision now what am I gonna do about it what's your new attitude going to be from this and I'm telling you it worked I calmed down I said a prayer I cried I got over the self-, and I focused, and I was like, okay, who do I want to be? Who do I want to be? How do I want to show up in this situation?

It was the best advice he gave me, and I've used it throughout my life, you know? But he gave me those little nuggets, and Your Fucking Welcome also was about like, you owe me a life. I gave you a life. Live it. You're welcome. All of us got here. You have parents, everybody, generations of generations of generations of people did not quit.

So you're, you got, you all definitely. Do not have the audacity to just sit and do nothing with everything that we went through for you because we had a big dream for you, all of you. And, and, and we do. And you guys, by the way, have done a phenomenal job. I mean, I'm looking every time I watch, I'm thinking, look at all these politicians coming on this show. Look at how they're changing the culture. Look what you're doing. And the truth is is this would not, this show would not have happened 20 years ago, 30 years ago. I'm sorry. It wasn't even probably jumped up. Do you know what I mean? Yeah. I follow, I follow Mr. Ava's blueprint. I'm telling you.

I've never seen a black man who, you know, had that type of influence in so many different industries. There's so much respect in so many different industries. To me, that's how you move culture forward for real. Yes, but that's what you guys have done. I mean, I hope you guys really understand. I'm not just saying this. I mean, it's real and it's a big deal. And it's a big deal for people of all colors, all races

to tune in and see what you create, see who gets to sit in this chair, listen to different ideas, by the way. I love that you have diverse ideas. I love that you have Republicans and independents and Democrats and everybody talking so that people can make an independent decision on who they are. I think that's very, very important,

especially for black men, because I think that's very, very important, especially for black men, because I think that black men have always been pigeonhole. Everybody else, you notice everybody else gets to be whatever they want. Everybody, everybody gets to think conservatively. I know everybody else. I'm like, wait a minute. Hold on. There are black conservative men. There are black independent men. There are black liberal men, just like every other type of man. Do you know? And every time I turned around, I was at a dinner table.

My black man's conservative. I said, but why are you hating on him? Because he's conservative because the white guy is conservative. The Asian guy is conservative. The Hispanic person is conservative. And none of you are throwing this person any shade whatsoever. And I don't know why this group only, not even women, I'm talking men only have to think one way.

We're not that kind of everybody else thinks different ways. Yes. I mean, Booker T Washington was there many, but remember we all come, many of us were Republican in the beginning. So I just, I don't know what I love that you do again is I love that I've watched everybody sit in this chair and there's different ideas and I've always taken a little piece from everybody. Even if I disagreed with 90%, there's always that 2%, 5% that I think, I never thought about that way. I agree with that. That's what you do. And I think it's really powerful what you guys do.

Thank you. Thank you so much I do have one last question six triple a right? That's out on Netflix now You can you can basically probably tell any story you want to and get it on Netflix if you want it to right How do you pick which stories you want to do? I? For me if it's For me personally, I love anything that's the thing about it. I think that's the thing about it. I think that's the thing about it. I think that's the thing about it.

I think that's the thing about it. I think that's the thing about it. I think that's the thing about it. I think that's the thing about it. I think that's the thing about it. I think that's the thing about it. I think that's the thing about it. I think that's the thing about it.

I think that's the thing about it. I something that people will be moved by and people will leave that room saying, Oh, I didn't know that or I feel so good about this or I don't care about that. That's what I care about. Empowering people, motivating people, inspiring people, any kind of script that I get that's like that. That's those are the stories that I want to tell I get that's like that. Those are the stories that I want to tell that move culture forward and have people thinking even in a different way than they ever have before. But that's what I love making people, I want people to feel good and I want people to feel positive and I want people to feel hopeful and also be educated in ways. You know, if I don't, I, like I said, we both said like, oh my God, I didn't know this story.

And I love the response around the world about the six, triple eight of every response is I had no idea. Number one. And then the second response is, and now I could feel that I could do anything or I've sat with my children and I've watched this with my children and this has been great. I mean, I was on Brett Baer's show on Fox and they were so supportive of the 6888.

And it was so great that this story is just resonating. That's what I mean. It's every, everybody wants to talk about this film because it's important and it's a great piece of history that everyone should know. Well, thank you for joining us this morning. it's important and it's it's a great piece of history that everyone should know. Well thank you for joining us this morning. That's right. You can check it on Netflix right now. It's streaming now and the book Think You'll Be Happy is out right now. Paperback is available right now with a forward by Ted Sarandos. Ted, tell Ted we do want him up here. Yes. Ted will

Ted will love it. He's great. Okay. Well we'll see you again when the other book comes out. Yes. Please. All right. Nicole Avant at the Breakfast Club. Good morning. Thank you. Thank you. Black History Month is here and we're excited to kick off season foe of I Didn't Know, Maybe You Didn't Either. This season we're shining a spotlight on revolutionary women who redefined excellence. Give Grace Wisher her flowers. Next time you see the American flag, you just remember a 16-year-old black woman helped

to make it happen. Listen to I Didn't Know. Maybe you didn't either. From the Black Effect Podcast Network, on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcast, or simply wherever you get your podcasts. I Didn't Know. Calling all Yellowstone fans. Let's go to work.

Join Bobby Bones on the official Yellowstone podcast for exclusive cast interviews, behind the scenes insights and a deep dive into the themes that have made Yellowstone a cultural phenomenon. Our family legacy is this ranch. An architect of my life. and social network. And we're still arguing about what the policy should be. Algorithms reward outrage. And we're still arguing about what the policy should be. And we're still arguing about what the policy should be. And we're still arguing about what the policy should be.

And we're still arguing about what the policy should be. And we're still arguing about what the policy should be. And we're still arguing about what the policy should be. And we're still arguing about what the policies should be, algorithms reward outrageous things. These fortunes are almost illegitimate unless in a very smart way given back. Listen to On Purpose with Jay Shetty on the iHeart radio app, Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts. than anything. You're left alone, you know, you do three hours in the morning, you write three hours in the afternoon, go pick up a kid from school, and right at night, and after nine hours you come out with seven pages, and then you're moving on.

Listen to Here's the Thing on the iHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.