The Breakfast Club - No Ceilings: Conversations About Dating A Woman & Her Ego

Episode Date: November 24, 2024

The Black Effect Presents... No Ceilings! The No Ceilings crew examines the complexities of relationships, the dynamics of communication, trust, and the roles of ego and leadership. They explore the  societal expectations of masculinity, the importance of protection and provision and the impact of economic factors, the need for gratitude and appreciation in relationships and more. Tune in and join the conversation in the socials below. Rate, subscribe, comment and share. Follow NC on IG @GlassesLoc @AjaTheRedHead @RealBritneyMichelle @Peter_Bas_Boss See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Had enough of this country? Ever dreamt about starting your own? I planted the flag. This is mine. I own this. It's surprisingly easy. There are 55 gallons of water, 500 pounds of concrete. Or maybe not. No country willingly gives up their territory. Oh my god. What is that?

Bullets. Listen to Escape from Zakistan. We need help! That's Escape from Z-A-Q-istan on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Mike Tyson's journey to recovery reminds us that no fight is easy. With every bumpy start, each setback and moments that could have broken him, he kept pushing forward. I never knew what the spiral was coming up in my life. I never knew I was gonna go in there and be just hopelessness

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Can you believe we have a whole bunch of wicked episodes coming up? Oh, I can't wait to share all of these amazing episodes with the readers, ktis, publicists, and finalists. That's right. We're talking all things behind bringing this iconic musical to the big screen. And of course, we're taking you inside the world of this epic movie with all the exclusive details you won't hear anywhere else.

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for our show Civic Cipher. That's right. We discuss social issues, especially those that affect black and brown people, but in a way that informs and empowers all people. We discuss everything from prejudice to politics to police violence, and we try to give you the tools to create positive change in your home, workplace, and social circle. We're going to learn how to become better allies to each other. So join us each Saturday for Civic Cipher on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcast, or wherever you get your podcast. Hey there, I'm Dr. Maya Shankar,

and I'm a scientist who studies human behavior. Many of us have experienced a moment in our lives that changes everything, that instantly divides our life into a before and an after. On my podcast, A Slight Change of Plans, I talk to people about navigating these moments. Their stories are full of candor and hard-won wisdom.

And you'll hear from scientists who teach us how we can be more resilient in the face of change. Listen on the iHeartRadio app, Apple podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Watch up, and welcome back to another episode of No Seals Podcast with your host. Now fuck that with your low glasses, Malone. Yes, baby. What you need? What you need, daddy? Like, okay, you know, and it's been,

we've been like, we've been like good. Like, of course, yeah, we gonna get into a little like, but it's nothing, like nothing. And I do find myself like listening. Like listening to like, okay. You just gave us, that's the truth, right? And the truth is, this is why you have to communicate, right? But you have to communicate effectively, right? Because you can't have two men. A ego is a man. That's why men have egos.

Is that fair to say, Pete, men have egos? Yeah, I mean, everybody has them, but I mean, in the relationship dynamic, I mean, the issue is the issue is like to me, women want to be led, but they don't want to not. They don't want to acknowledge that there is a leader in the room and they're not it. I don't think that's necessarily always true. Now there are women I think that's necessarily always true. Now there are women that do need or think they need to lead.

I was one of them. I am not, no, I am no longer one of them, but I do know a lot of women that absolutely don't wanna lead shit. They absolutely are okay with the man leading and doing and providing and doing everything. They are okay with the man leading and doing and providing and doing everything they are not I'm sure they okay with somebody taking care of them there's not a woman just take over would be okay with the man taking care of her you would not

be okay mining somebody right now and because it because of the connotation of mining right like listening to somebody give you directions. I'm good with that now. I just be like, hey, don't go here. Okay. But I think that also comes with the trust in the relationship and who you're with. And that's where I fucked up. I was dealing with motherfuckers

that I really didn't trust like that. And that's the honest to God truth. Because if I really trusted my man, I'm going to let him lead me. And he's going to tell, when he tells me something, I'm gonna be like, okay, babe, you were I okay, or whatever. But before I was dealing motherfuckers that I'm like, nigga, you could do that, then why would I listen to you? Why would I mess with that person? Yeah. Why would you sleep with anybody? Hello, wouldn't

listen to. I know that makes that sounds. It makes a lot of sense, but yeah, you know, when you say that. But these are these are things that we were learning as we're growing. It's like a man sleeping with somebody he doesn't want to get pregnant. Right now. Totally get it. Right. I stand in my shit. I know what time it was. I knew. And it took me a while to understand that because I'm dealing with you. And my question, like the guy I told you can't get right. You like, why the hell you call him?

Why are you doing with my as I got older? Yeah, I laugh at it now. Like, why was I dealing with this person? Like, what the hell was wrong with you? You saw all the red flags. You is something that the man can't get right. The nigga's name is can't get right in your phone. Like can't get literally nothing like so.

And that's what I mean. And that's that's where we have to learn to say, you know, we can be by our women. We don't need to, you know, some women come from a background where, again, they lead a poly relationship. They're dating their ego and their man. And some women are dating their ego, their man and their kids. Yeah, I think that with me, I'm just so used to leading,

like making decisions and just kinda doing my own thing at the same time. It's like, then I'm wondering like, okay, well, what are you bringing to the table? Like we can't talk on the same level or we're not interested in the same things. But once I realized like, okay, you gotta take this ego out of the relationship because you're, you're not a man. Like you can't do or be anything

close to, you know, what a man can be. And, um, I didn't want to be with a woman. So. Well, I disagree. You can, you, I'm sure you and Brett have did the same things that a man have done. What I'm saying with the feeling, as far as the feeling that I want from somebody else, a man, a woman can't give that to me.

So unless I want it to be by myself, I'm like, okay, I gotta. But what, but what is the feeling specifically I want it to be by myself, I'm like, OK, I got to. But what but what is the feeling specifically? Is it to be cared for? Or is it just the fact that he has a penis biologically is different? I'm saying like he can the puzzle is different. And that's what these know, but these is real questions. You know, I mean, that people need to ask.

I want to feel protected, like, so then, you know, and that's important, right? To feel protected. Guess what? Like, like your child, right? So like, like, let's say Roland, right? Like you have to, hey, he can't, like, imagine you trying to protect him. He's doing the things that you know could cause him danger. Right. That's how it is being a man dealing with a woman. So that's why sometimes men tone, especially when you're being stubborn, like a child can take the form of talking to a child, because that's what it starts to feel like. And I'm sure for some women, that's what it starts to feel like

when a man starts to do the wrong thing. He start acting like your kid. Definitely. Yeah. And that's where that's what it goes like. What? That's what it's like. Wait, what? Yeah. And kids are kids. The only reason they're kids is because they can't be accountable for themselves.

Like, that's the problem. The problem is, like, I've argued with friends who have grown kids and I'm like, they keep trying to treat their kids like kids, right? They'll do whatever the kid want them to do, but these kids are fucking, cause they're 19 or 20. And I tell my homie like, that's not no kid.

Like they only plan you to take care of them for them to make their own decisions. So you gotta find a space in the middle or you taking care of an adult that you're fucking dating. Right? Think about it, right? If your son, if your job is to protect your son, Britt, if like, if he's trying to go to a Hoover party and you know this is a Hoover party where all the gang members are there and you know that other people know they might come shoot it up and your job is taking me like, don't go to that party,

and he goes to that party, guess what you're gonna say to him when you figure out he was at that party? You finna fly off the handle because you're making my job hard of protection. Well, for women, they should think of that the same way when they're talking to a man. Like, if you want, you don't want to go somewhere with Cuz and, you know, somebody start to put hands on you and he don't help you.

Right. But if he tell you don't walk in his room with all these fucking boxers and tripping ass drunk people and your stupid ass walking, you gonna get both our ass kicked. So women cannot date their own ego and a man at the same time. A man is going to come with the ego because that's what he needs to propel himself to the position to take care of his family. That's what he should be using it for. He should be using it to define his reputation. He should be using it to define his credit.

He should be using it to build his economic portfolio, his base, what are you doing? That's the only thing that's good for him. So the ego, not with us, with women, but with everybody else or the outside world, because I think men, sometimes they don't wanna be, well, they don't wanna be vulnerable because they wanna carry this ego,

but we need to, we wanna feel and see and know that we can be there for you at those vulnerable times, you know, aside from God, but, you know, you don't have to carry an ego with us all the time. Like, you know. Well, yes, that shouldn't be, but you still do. Because again, you want somebody you're asking for women have this weird sense of demand. They want a bunch of stuff that don't really go together.

Imagine your man like, well, I want to know you could take care of yourself too. So I could take care of you. So you should pay the mortgage every other month. You wouldn't see it that way, right? So that's how it feels like you asking your man to, you want him to be hella tough, but then he come crying to you because somebody, you know, at the ice cream parlor. I'm not talking about that though.

Because you don't think it's that deep, right? Well, we feel the same, we are the same, right? Men and women are the same, right? We all feel the same thing. We have estrogen like y'all have testosterone. So we feel certain things hurt our feelings that probably are not worthy of, you know, on a social status of your feelings being hurt,

but it still hurts your feelings. As I get older, certain scenes in movie that I saw a million times could make me feel like emotional as I get older. Like I might look at, like I watched, last night I watched, what's the movie Will Smith when he was trying to get the job in San Francisco, Pete? Oh, Pursuit of Happiness.

He got the job and almost cried. I cried on that movie. That movie is yeah. Right. So we have the same feelings, right? Because it emotionally moved me. I was like damn, so happy this nigga got the job. Like it's a real story. But again, it's like, so we have the same things, but you ask us to use

the testosterone driven emotions. You ask that, but then sometimes you'll be like, well, when you with me, you should let the estrogen. No, because then you a judge later. You know what I mean? Like, you know he has these feelings and he should be treated as such, just like I know a woman could take care of herself. I'm not stupid. I'm not doing something that no woman couldn't do for herself. True. Women take care of themselves just fine.

Women could change a tire, change the engine. You do all that. You know, bench press weights. My mama had hands, some women could fight. Yeah. You know, women are construction workers. Women do the same thing men, but you want to be put into a space where you can lean on your estrogen.

You want that space. That's true. Right? I do. This has been actually great. Is your country falling apart? Feeling tired, depressed, a little bit revolutionary? Consider this, start your own country.

I planted the flag. I just kind of looked out of like, this is mine. I own this. It's surprisingly easy. There are 55 gallons of water, 500 pounds of concrete. Everybody's doing it. I am King Ernest Emmanuel. I am the Queen of La Donia. I'm Jackson I, King of Capriberg. I am the Supreme Leader of the Grand Republic of Montonia.

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What is that? Bullets. Bullet holes, yeah. We need help! We still have the off-road portion to go. Listen to Escape from Zakistan. And we're losing daylight fast. That's Escape from Z-A-Q-istan on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get

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I don't know. I always feel that way as well. I guess everybody feels they're here for a reason. Yeah? Okay. Even if it's to suffer to help other people understand suffering is not as bad as we believe it is. I believe everybody learns from each other.

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Can you believe we have a whole bunch of wicked episodes coming up? Oh, I can't wait to share all of these amazing episodes with the readers, ktis, publicists, and finalists. That's right, we're talking all things behind bringing this iconic musical to the big screen. And of course, we're taking you inside the world of this epic movie with all the exclusive details you won't hear anywhere else. It's Wicked in a way you've never heard before. Don't miss it, and be sure to go watch Wicked in theaters starting November 22nd. Listen to Los Culturistas on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

Hey, what's up? This is Ramses Jop. And I go by the name Q Ward. And we'd like you to join us each week for our show Civic Cipher. That's right. We're going to discuss social issues, especially those that affect black and brown people, but in a way that informs and empowers all people to hopefully create better allies. Think of it as a black show for non-black people. We discuss everything from prejudice to politics

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on iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. No, silence, GL. Pete, what's happening? Just here for the convo. Red, Red, what's happening? Hey, what's going on? What's wrong, Pete? No, I said I'm late to the room. I know that's weird. What's wrong, Pete? You just arrived? No, I said I'm late to the room.

I know, but I text you a couple of times, everything okay? I was taking a nap. Okay. How's that as you get older, naps? Are they important? They can be. So I'm down 45 pounds, Pete.

Once I get to 50 pounds down, that's when I'm gonna start bringing in my weight training. What I've been thinking about is more like fly weights. Like more calisthenics, like pushups, pull-ups, all of that stuff. Not so much weight. I don't really wanna get a bunch of muscles. Like I don't, cause I don't wanna be,

my goal was to not be heavy if I make it to 50. Sure. So I wanna be as lean as possible, right? Now it ain't about the muscles. It ain't about the look. It's just about the health part. Yeah. So, but that was my point.

So back to the, I digress, but that becomes the problem. So like sometimes when you would complain, I would say like, hey, you are letting way too much ego rule this part, like to be in a righteous situation because you have to kind of remove that. Like, yeah, he gonna be frustrated because this is how it is being a man. When you always, like, as a man,

like I'm only viewed as a real man if I take care of somebody completely. I'm not even viewed as a real man if I pay half. Like I'm viewed as a male because I have a penis, right? That's my initial thing, but I'm not viewed as a man if I pay half. If I go half with a woman, I'm not viewed as a man. By whom? By society. That's my initial thing, but I'm not viewed as a man. If I pay half, if I go half with a woman, I'm not viewed as a man.

By whom? By society. Even by your lady, she not going to respect you the same way. She not going to treat you like you're leading anything. You think? Do you think that? I mean, what do you think? Your son is a man right now. Do you think he's a man? You he could make his own decisions?

No, because he don't take care of himself. That's true. And that nigga is a man. He probably bigger than you and everything is whoop your ass and all kind of shit. Change your time. Everything. There's a lot of men that go have with a girls. Yeah, I'm sure with stuff.

So would you say that that's great? Would you say that's a man? Yeah, I don't think that I don't think that that would be less of a man. I don't think so. I've never been in that situation, but I don't think I would have been like, oh, shit, you not you know I'm saying you respect you would respect your man the same as you're lying. So what? So I would take that away because of something. Imagine your man couldn't stand up for you. If you want to street somebody start getting different. That's not different. That is different.

You can't. How is that different? Tech and provide or how men are defined socially, is that fair to say? Protect and provide. I men are defined socially. Is that fair to say, Pete, protect and provide? I would say so. Yeah, but if you can't, we already had this discussion before I told you about how to do it off, watch it carried away. And after that, it was a denzo for me. I told you about that because like, what the hell?

Which means so as long as he can protect you, that's basically number one, protecting you. And then you want to protect yourself. What kind of shit is that? What if you just don't got great hands? And that's unfortunate. She ain't about to be with nobody. Ain't got so again.

Yeah, like I do know that there's a lot of men. Some of my friends are in these same relationships, but I also know how women treat them. You know what I mean? It is kind of considered a slight in society to go half with your old lady, even though these California bills are insane. Stupid. So yes, but I do think more women than not are making it work but again the goal for women is to find somebody who could take care of them and protect them. That's their goal.

That's the most successful women socially. Now, again, the reality is something is different. Reality is a lot of this shit is expensive and it's not just gonna be most guys gonna be able to do it. You know, and me and Pete had a great conversation about this where he was like, man, really you should move.

He's saying out of the state or wherever. Yeah, you got to move where you can take care of. We both agree you should move to a place where you can take care of your family as a man, right? Because again, it defines you. It's not worthy of being anywhere where you can't look up and say you're not putting a roof over your family head. But again, my perspective is not

dominant because I understand if you in California, even the thought of moving, but Pete told me the story of how his family moved out here because it was like that. Before that, where they was at, it was a little tougher out here. What was your grandfather was able to take care of his family because it was cheaper. Yeah, well, it was it wasn't cost cheaper, but it was so much opportunity. Yeah, there was more it was more on the on the income side. I was for both sides of my family. I mean, that's why everybody like, like your grandparents who moved out here, it was the same thing. It wasn't like, well, it's cheaper in LA than Alabama. But it's like everyone's getting paid out there. There's no economy where we are here now. So we move,

either move to avoid costs or to pursue revenue. So that's like a brilliant model that nobody told us, but white people kind of are aware. And don't get me wrong, I do think the generation above ours, they were better humans. Like our generation is worse humans. Even the generation now, they feel like they're better. They're actually much worse humans. You know what I mean? Because they don't, like I was talking to my nephew

about the diddy shit and he didn't even, he started saying, just making shit up. Like, oh, you know, he put a hit out on pocket. I'm like, do you not care that that's not true? Like, you care that's not what they're not charged? Well, he slept with some minors. Do you not care that that's not true? They're not charging me with that?

Like, what part of a fact do you care about? They don't. They only care about whatever is going on socially within the conversation. Is that social sphere is where they convicting people at. Like the feds came out and said, the feds talked about that, the surviving R Kelly, it made the feds start to investigate.

Right, I did see something like that. And so this, the Cassie lawsuit is what made them. Yes, really the dude that the attorney that's on social media, he and it's that's true because they're you got to remember, D.A. This is a big case for them. This is going to sell the deal looking for that type of exposure. Definitely. But it reminds me of a time where like when the community was kind of going through some

stuff, it was coming out of the crack era or kind of in the very, very last part of the twilight of where it was peaking at. And, you know, people were doing anything to get crack. So crime in Los Angeles was a little rampant. It was a lot going on. And instead of the community finding a solution, they turned to the white justice system to find a solution. So hence Joe Biden and certain people responded back with the crime bill, right, of 94. Right, which instituted three strikes. And immediately when you hear about how three strikes work,

it's really a double jeopardy law. It's like, if you went to jail for two felonies before, if you did this and then you steal something, we're gonna put you in prison for 25 years to life. So at that time people thought they were doing the right thing because they were so in their emotions. That's why a buddy of mine's us on Clubhouse. I met him and I would call him a buddy,

his name is Gary, but from Atlanta. He was saying that like, he felt like the black church spearheaded that movement with Biden and now, and again, whenever you turn to forgive me, Pete, because I don't mean every white person, but you know, I'm not sure. Right? I'm talking about the power structure in existence. When you turn to unjust people for justice, it's going to look bad on people that's poor, that look like us, that look like me. Right. So the same thing is happening now.

Yeah. They're like, like, again, like, we're looking at R. Kelly, we looking at Puff and it kind of fits into the same conversation, even with Cassie. Like Cassie is like, they talked about it, like, and this is really, I know that's the details. They tried to shake Puff down with the book, the thread of the book to get the 30 million. Yeah. Right. Puff felt it was a shakedown. I ain't going to give you nothing.

Puff actually was in a relationship with Cassie. Cassie stayed with Puff for years, not just out of fear. I'm sure there's a level of fear there. She stayed with Puff because Puff had money. Right. He's powerful. He puffed. She wanted to be successful in the music business. When you look up her past, she's been trying to be in the music business

and kind of ahead of her age for a long time. I mean, so she found somebody she thought could enhance her career and maybe they fell in love. Maybe they didn't, you know, I don't know. I'm not in a personal relationship, but they was together for years. You knew this nigga was weird within the first probably six months. You know what I mean? And not to call Diddy weird, but it's like you knew he was a deviant for sure within the first six months.

Because I knew Diddy was a deviant before you dated him. So maybe played it off for a couple months, but eventually the deviant side came out. You could walk. But then again, because she was looking for that level. She was very young though. Was she like 18, 19? Sure she was she was but again that's the problem too. That's if you're gonna have a legal ramification of age and responsibility and accountability 18 then it has to be 18.

It can't just be like well you know what she was fucking with that nigga he had money and she was just young and stupid. No, women gonna be like that till they fucking 70. You know what I mean? But it's like, man, it just puts us in a weird situation. Like they're charging these two dudes with racketeering. Harvey Weinstein actually was using his business as a racket. And what does that mean when they say they're charging them for racketeering?

So, racketeering or the RICO Act people talked about is a law created in 1970, I think it's 1970. So, when they couldn't catch, before 1970, America had to catch you committing crimes. They had to charge you with the crime that you committed. The mafia bosses or the mob bosses who were organizing all of the crimes, right, the mafia bosses, the mob bosses were organizing crimes. They weren't actually out committing crimes. They couldn't prove that they did a crime, but they knew they had the power to organize and make a crime happen. So they created a law, which kind of conspiracy and all these different things, they all rooted

into all of this same idea. It's like thought into laws, thought into crime, like the thought of crime. And that's how they started taking down mafias and mob bosses. And America probably should have, actually America probably in 1970 should have stood up, the people should have stood up against that law because that became the problem, right? Like where you don't have to catch nobody doing the crime now. If I make you do a crime, that's the crime. No, there's accountability for adults. I can tell you to do whatever the fuck I tell you to do.

I could pay you to do whatever I pay you to do. If your ass do it, it's your fucking fault. But again, to, you know, you avoiding accountability. And they did that to take down the mafia and the mob bosses. And you have to respect it, right? Because, I mean, they'd be in those situations where they can't say no. You can always say no. You don't actually have to be a prostitute. I mean, you can. But if you're going to get killed or, you know, say your family's going to get hurt and I'm talking about with the mob, things like that.

Yeah, like, of course. No, nobody's gonna hurt your family because you didn't do what I said. Who says who in the mob? What are you talking about? I mean, unless, oh, no, it's that it's only on power. OK, that's like black. That's not 50 cent is not. That's not how you.

They say. Oh, no. I'm saying there's intimidation. There is, you know. But you can't be like being a coward should be against the law. If somebody threatens your family, go to the police. Because if you want to underwear to somebody, threaten your family, you know what you're supposed to do. If you want to underwear, you know, like if you don't,

if the law is not the ultimate sense of justice and you have, you know, your own sense of justice, like in the street, underworld. If somebody's telling your family, you're supposed to kill that person on the spot. I don't give a fuck if it's the greatest mob boss in the world, cut his fucking head off. But we gotta stop this weird law of making it okay for people to be a bitch is crazy.

Like, oh, you could be a mark. Somebody could mark you out and they call that coercion. No, you's a mark. I was just talking about it on Twitter with Gene Deal. Gene Deal is running around like he's a hero because he'd been talking about what Puff did now Puff got arrested. Nigga, he was paying you, doing it in front of you

and you didn't do nothing to him. Now, and the reason you didn't do nothing to Cuzz is because you was getting paid. The reason you doing these interviews talking about Cuzz is because you was getting paid. The reason you doing these interviews talking about Cuzz is because you getting paid. Who is this? This is one of the main people that was working for him that was, they call it an early whistleblower.

Like, Puff was doing some things. But it's like, I couldn't be next to Birdman. He was doing some buster ass shit. If Birdman was next to me and he was, you know what I mean? Look, if Birdman was beating up his old lady, I'd have stopped him. Like if that's me and that's Birdman was next to me and he was, you know what I mean? Look, if Birdman was beating up his old lady, I'd have stopped him. Like if that's me and that's Birdman with Tony Braxton in that fucking elevator video and Birdman,

I'm finna push, hey, Stunna, what's up? Come on, hold up, bro. No, bro, we finna get out. Now, if I broke it up the first time and then you still with this dude, I'm not either going to be around for sure. I'm going to stop hanging with you all if I don't leave from being around you. I ain't going to watch you with your old lady multiple times. So even if like a gene deal saw that situation happening with them

and you broke it up and then they kept doing it, you was taken. Now I'm not going to be around you. I don't be around. Nobody committing no crime. I don't want to go to jail for. I know that's where I am. I don't hang around nobody. Me and my big homie got into an argument because he wanted to kill some taxi cab driver for calling him a nigger.

And I'm like, nigger everybody, I'm not going to prison for that. They're not finna be like, what you in jail for? Oh man, the homie knocked this nigger down. My G homie, the homie knocked this taxi cab driver down because he called him the N word. And I'm not finna go to prison for that. I'm gonna get the rest of my life for that dumb ass shit. No, fuck that.

No, and that was me as a kid. I'm not, you can't, I don't give a fuck how tough you is. If something I don't wanna do, you ain't gonna make me do it, let alone take dick like some of the people in that case i'm gonna kill you nigga yeah some people just don't have that it's not that some people don't see it no some people just care about maybe but money yeah and money means everything that's why puff this is happening the reason you go by them prostitutes is because prostitutes are for sale. The reason you go buy people is because people are for sale. The reason Gene Deal didn't actually do nothing to Puff or stop Puff when he was doing this or,

you know, as an ex-probation officer, go to the police is because he was bought and paid for. And I'm tired of people acting like the problem is the people paying. The problem ain't the people paying. The problem ain't the people paying. The problem ain't people want to have sex with a prostitute. The problem is the fucking prostitute selling pussy for money. If there is a problem. If there is a problem, like we could get to the real problems. Yeah. That's nice. But then they said,

I just wouldn't have been around. And if there was no, I'm like, I could be no pimps. There was no prostitute. Man. I mean, look at the end of the day. I mean, who they gonna p be if they don't prostitute? That's true.

But then there's a lot of used Buicks need selling. You said what? So there's a lot of used Buicks need selling. A lot of used Buicks that need to be sold. Is your country falling apart? Feeling tired, depressed, a little bit revolutionary? Consider this, start your own country. I planted the flag. I just kind of looked out of like this is mine, I own this. It's surprisingly easy. There are 55 gallons of water, 500 pounds of concrete. Everybody's doing it. I am King Ernest Emmanuel.

I am the Queen of La Donia. I'm Jackson I, King of Capriberg. I am the Supreme Leader of the Grand Republic of Montonia. Be part of a great colonial tradition. Why can't I create my own country? My forefathers did that themselves. What could go wrong? No country willingly gives up their territory.

I was making a racket with the black powder, you know, with explosive warheads. Oh my God. What is that? Bullets. Bullets. We need help! We still have the off-road portion to go.

Listen to Escape from Zakistan. And we're losing daylight fast. That's Escape from Z-A-Q-istan on the iHeart Radio app,, Apple podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. I'm Stephen McFarland, therapist, life coach, change agent, who helps everyone from celebrities, athletes, to ex-gang members through their addictions and help them wake up. In each episode by podcast, we hear inspirational stories, we draw lessons from those who have

made it through their addiction and recovery to a better place, including legendary boxer, heavyweight boxing champion Mike Tyson. I feel like there's always been a calling for you, something higher. I don't know. I always feel that way as well. But I guess everybody feels they're here for a reason. Yeah, okay. Even if it's to suffer, to help other people understand suffering is not

as bad as we believe it is. I believe everybody learns from each other. Why are you here, you think? To show people that you know anything's possible if you don't give up, anything's possible. Listen to The CINO Show on iHeart, radio app, Apple Podcast, wherever you get your podcasts. Hey Bo. Hey Matt. Can you believe we have a whole bunch of wicked episodes coming up?

Oh, I can't wait to share all of these amazing episodes with the readers, ktis, publicists, and finalists. That's right We're talking all things behind bringing this iconic musical to the big screen. And of course, we're taking you inside the world of this epic movie with all the exclusive details you won't hear anywhere else. It's Wicked in a way you've never heard before. Don't miss it and be sure to go watch Wicked in theaters starting November 22nd. Listen to Lost Culturistas on the iHeartRadio app,

Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Hi, I'm Marie. And I'm Sydney. And we're M.E.S.S. Well, not a mess, but on our podcast called MESS, we celebrate all things messy. But the gag is, not everything is a mess. Sometimes it's just living. Yeah, things like JLo on her third divorce. Living. Girl's trip to Miami.

MESS. Ozempic. Messy, skinny, living. Restaurant stealing a birthday cake. Mess. Wait, what flavor was the cake though? Okay, that's a good question. Hooking up with someone in accounting

and then getting a promotion. Living. Breaking up with your girlfriend while on Instagram Live. Living. This kind of mess. Yeah, well, you get it. Got it. Live This kind of mess. Yeah. Well, you get it. Got it?

Live, love, mess. Listen to Mess with Sydney Washington and Marie Faustin on iHeartRadio app, Apple podcast, or wherever you get your podcasts. Hey, what's up? This is Ramses Jop. And I go by the name Q Ward. And we'd like you to join us each week for our show Civic Cipher. That's right. We're going to discuss social issues, especially those that affect black and brown people, but in

a way that informs and empowers all people to hopefully create better allies. Think of it as a black show for non-black people. We discuss everything from prejudice to politics to police violence, and we try to give you the tools to create positive change in your home, workplace, and social circle. Exactly. Whether you're Black, Asian, White, Latinx, Indigenous, LGBTQIA+, you name it. If you stand with us, then we stand with you. Let's discuss the stories and conduct the interviews that will help us create a more empathetic, accountable, and equitable America. You are all our brothers and sisters, and we're inviting you to join us for Civic Cipher each and every Saturday with myself, Ramses Jha, Q Ward, and some of the greatest minds

in America. Listen to Civic Cipher every Saturday on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcast. What's the coercion charge like? Well, from my understanding is that he had these parties, yes, people are coming to the parties, but they're not knowing that the bottles are laced, they're drinking alcohol, but it is laced,

and that there's cameras, like. They can't charge him for that, you know why? Because people can have as many fucking cameras in their house as they want. And you know what? I have a friend who just went through a situation where, um, yeah, they told her that this man can have his cameras in his own house. Yeah. That's true.

It's not against the law. But the recording though. That's not against the law. Without their consent. If you come in my property, what is the, okay. No, I can't fuck. I don't talk about this thing. Well, just explain that part to her. Okay. So did these three charges, there's only three, right? There's racketeering, there's sex trafficking, there's transportation for prostitution.

Yep. OK. Now they're saying the those three indictments are built by these different crimes. Right. Coercion is how was detailed in the indictment is like, well, he would threaten to take people's finances away if they didn't do what he said. Like he would fire people if they didn't do what he said. Do. Okay. And I'm like, that's how a job works. Okay.

They're saying the racketeering charges, what they're saying is all along the time over the last, since 2008, which they really wasn't investigating, but based off of what they've been able to figure out what the witnesses, since 2008, different crimes Puff has done, comb enterprises becomes like a criminal underworld

because they're blocking things. Prime example, when they got into the little squabble in the hotel, because when somebody saw it, the maid saw it and saw it, instead of letting her call the police, or maybe she doesn't, Puff says, look, don't call the police, I need to deal with this ourselves, I'ma pay you.

Can you get the video? I'll pay for that too. They said they combining that with that, and they said, okay, because his team helped facilitate that to some degree, I don't quite know what his team did, maybe they called after to get the video or whatever. And then the next thing is like, okay, well, he blew up kid, cut his car. So they're talking about arson.

Oh, so they're, they're linking all of these crimes together to charge him like a crime boss. Got it. When in reality, that's not why the letter can fit. That's not the spirit Got it. That's when in reality that's not while the letter can fit that's not the spirit of it. You just talk about a really nasty older man who has money and power you know what I mean in a really turbulent relationship with women. You know again his enterprise will be built off buying women more like he don't have rate charges and he didn't force nobody to do nothing.

Even like, even if they're charging him per se with, let's say, oh, people talk about the alcohol was laced. These are common things people knew going to Diddy party. Like you kind of knew that they party a little harder. Like I knew that walking up, like they party harder. So if I don't party as hard as them, I probably don't need to be partying with them. So again, but now in hindsight, you know, it's like,

oh, well that's, you know, that ain't right. But people knew that. The people who went to Diddy's parties knew how Diddy party. Diddy is on, you know, he take drugs, he drink. But I don't think, I don't think all the, say the young like girls,, you know, he take drugs, he drink. But I don't think, I don't think all the, say the young like girls, cause you know, you'll have somebody like,

oh, we're going to a party at Diddy's and then all the, you know. You knew what that was. Well, the person that brought them should have told them. The part, exactly. That was my point. Why are you going to a party if you don't know Diddy? The person that brought them should have told them

because there's a lot of girls fresh out of high, very naive. I'm going to Diddy's house to party. They don't know what they go to other people's house to party. So they're like, I'm going to Diddy's house to party. Yes, we're going to party. But then they end up the bottles are laced,

but the person who brought them, they know what's cracking. Don't nobody or they should have known. It's a lot of people. I have a young daughter and she, you know what I'm saying? She's just like, I'm not going to go, but. We've all, since we were probably in our twenties been hearing about Hadidi parties. None of us have not heard Hadidi parties.

But we're older. No, no, since in our twenties, we've been hearing about Hadidi parties. Right. All of us have not heard how Diddy party. But we're older, but we're- No, no, since in our twenties, we've been hearing about how Diddy party. Right. All of us. And everybody's aspiration was to go to a Diddy party, knowing it was crazy. Cause you know it's gonna be bananas, gonna be a gang of people.

It was gonna be the party though, but I didn't think that I was gonna go to the party and get Lace drinking some alcohol. No. Well, see the only reason why I knew about that, told you, is because I actually seen that not at Diddy's house, but at another Hollywood Hills home where I actually seen them doing it. And I'm like, oh, this is what's going on.

And after that, that's when I knew like, okay, this is what's really going on. But had I not, I think that would have happened to me. Why would you go to Diddy's party and drink alcohol? Why are you knowing your inhibition? What are you doing? Like, and see, this is where the questions get really hard. They stop being like lack of accountability. They stop being like, oh, you know, why the fuck would you go to a strange house and drink alcohol?

Because when you go to a party, you're going to a party, not every, okay, this is Diddy. So I do know this person, but there's several parties that we've been to that we don't know whose house it is. Why would you go to somebody's house? I mean, not now, but we're talking about younger, in younger ages. Okay. You remember dating when you was younger? Yeah.

You know why men brought you liquor? Yeah. And I wasn't drinking it with them. You know dating when you was younger? Yeah. You know why men brought you liquor? Yeah. And I wasn't drinking it with them. You know what I'm saying? But you're going to a party. You're 21. I'm not talking like- Why would you take awareness? See, and these are the real-

You going, if they're, if they have the liquor G at the bar and they're making drinks and this drink is laced- Even in a place where other people are? You don't really want me to ask the questions that I really wanna ask. You know why I don't drink red?

Cause I don't never wanna not know what the fuck is going on. I feel you. I feel you. You know why you drink? Because you don't wanna know what's going on. You wanna enhance whatever it is you wanna feel. And I'm not, look,

I'm not trying to come down on a world that drinks or smoke weed or do cocaine or pop eggs. That's not what I'm saying. I'm saying y'all have to start being honest with what the goal is in the first place of why you're doing what you're doing. And then you can say, oh, this is too far.

I didn't want this particular thing to happen. But this can only happen because you are not in your mind. Like why, why? I never drank nothing at nobody party because I always wanted to be in control. And that's great. And those, you know, everybody isn't mindful. So then again, that's the accountability part. Right. That goes back into the whole, I get it. But where's the accountability for the person back into the whole. I get it.

But where's the accountability for the person that you know I'm saying is, why are you spiking liquor and telling everybody to get pussy? Everybody knows you want. And even if he wouldn't get in the bus, he wanted everybody to feel. So they could say, oh, I was at the house. Yeah. It's already with you. Because again, you know how people feel about sex and feel like oh man, they feel special about things I'm not saying by no means again for the four four fifth six seven fucking podcast

I am NOT saying that I think Diddy is not you know, he don't have things he should be charged with But again, there's a lot of missing accountability that creates a mafia like figure that don't make no sense accountability that creates a mafia like figure that don't make no sense. Like we have to go to we have to get to a place in society where people actually start to have accountability. Why is him and R Kelly the only we go charge where they're the only two people charge in every other we go charge. They charge a thousand other people. Why is only them charge?

Why is this the first week? Why are Kelly? Why Weinstein get charged with Rakuten? Weinstein was using his business to actually rape women. He got charged with rape multiple times. Who was business? He doesn't have a racketeering charge? No.

Why the fuck did not Cuzz get charged? Epstein, he actually was actually running that type of business. Puff is just nasty. He's a nasty old bastard. They got a bad drug problem and he's on alcohol really bad. So he's making bad decisions. That's not John Gotti's thing.

That's not what John Gotti's problem. John Gotti's sober as a motherfucker making these decisions. And he getting people killed. Puff is just nasty. And this is his way of, to me, this is kind of, like I hear the term term because Puff considers himself a man of God, right? And I think in his heart, he feels that,

but his mind is kind of a little different. Like it's more stuff going on. Like people, even in indictment, they talk about how to fact certain, some of the pills, you know, oh, well, he used drugs to control people. He didn't stuff no drugs down people's mouth. Like we gotta eventually get back

to a space of accountability. That's the beginning of this conversation that we even talking about, where women wanna date their ego and a man. So then you got, again, you don't have space for the man if you got your ego. If you need to be a proud human, a proud provider, then what you need a man for? Maybe, you know, you can be like Diddy and just buy one. Just buy one. You know what I'm saying? So it's just frustrating.

It's frustrating. And then the world is happening in front of the world and on all levels, even from the beginning of this conversation where women are being taught to be like, oh, you know, from the independent songs, like, why would you have to brag you take care of yourself? I-E-N-D-E, why is that a good song? Like there's no songs like that for me and I pay my own bills. Well, where's our song like that? I take care of myself.

That's not pay my own rent. I got my own car. That's not a cool man's song. Because it was always expected for you guys to do that. It was. Women weren't supposed to work. Well, women didn't work and, you know, they weren't taking care of their self. So now you have to brag for being in a.

That's what happened. They shout it out from the ceiling. I'm saying, what are we doing? I think it's equivalent to celebrating a birthday. Yeah, like everybody has I'm not homeless. Look at me. Hey, I didn't die in the last year. Look at me Well, we didn't always have that so when when did women not have jobs? All the women my family always had jobs, so I mean, I'm just, you know, going back, I guess.

I mean, that's the job too though. I just see if the song is gonna get an equal pay and shit. Like, oh, you know what? We making all of that. We making this much money. Okay, cool. But you bragging about the ability to take care of yourself as an adult is crazy. Even a term single mom is like,

I don't know what that really means. What do you mean, single mom? What the fuck is that? You was fucking. That's how you had a kid. But she's a single mom. You know, she's single. OK, yeah, she fucked and she had a kid, but she's a single. The daddy not there in a title.

I mean, all that shows is that you was fucking and you're not with the nigger you was. So how? OK, that's not nothing to brag about. What if we start using the term single mom? We use the term failed wife. Bye. What the fuck? Oh, no. Oh, man. Oh, man.

You know, it's just, it's just, we, we, we start maneuvering society to a really weird space. I mean, like, it's just really like I said, we're men, you know, you're not supposed to brag that you. That's a flex when you brag and that, you know, you take care of a woman, it's not a flex, it's that you take care of yourself. Wait, it's a flex when you say you take care of a woman? Yeah, you take care of your family. And that didn't used to be a flex, but that's a flex now. If you pay all the bills, that's a flex.

Oh, for sure. Oh, sure. Y'all go for shows. They are taken. I take care of you. If a woman took care of a man, she is considered a failure in society. You'd be like. Imagine you had to take care of that dude.

Like you have to take care of him. Everything he do, every dumb ass mistake he make. That's how I feel. Every time he do some dumb shit, he even wrecked his car, you gotta fix it. Keep the AC on when you're going to work, you gotta pay the bill. That's how it is being a man.

A woman is expecting you to take care of her no matter what silly mistakes she make. That's right. Yeah, so sorry for y'all. I mean, it's all good. It's all good. I mean, it's just the society we live in. I just don't want people to forget. If they didn't know, they know now. It's just the society we live in. I just don't want people to forget.

If they didn't know, they know now. It's a, you know, you're taking care of physical things, you know, stuff like that, but we taking care of the house. I look, I think a whole household, don't get me wrong. I think, I don't think a woman don't pull her own weight, even if a man is paying all the bills. It's not about that. But if you don't have a woman don't pull her own weight even if a man is paying all the bills. It's not about that. But if you don't have a true appreciation for that, then you forget the gratitude portion of it.

I mean, I do think taking care of a house is a ton of work. I think washing and making sure the kids and all that is a ton of work. I don't think it's a lack of respect for that work, but obviously you know the work that's tough. Because you know the work that's tough because you know the work you don't want to do. I bet you you could find a man who would actually, you know, he wouldn't mind ironing your clothes for you to get up and go make all the money and he just get to sit at home and go get his hair cut and look nice for you when he come home and cook dinner. Still a different job. You still wouldn't, even if you, you know know, if cuz lost his job and then you he making all the food, it

might be cool for the first few months. I mean, you like damn, you know, this ain't then eventually you're gonna look and you know, he left his moon roof open and now you got to pay for his interior and electronics to get fixed. That shit gonna start to come out. You're gonna be like, hold up, bro. Have you ever watched? I mean, did you ever see Mr. Mom? I was just thinking, wasn't there a movie called Mr. Mom like decades ago?

As basically. She wasn't feeling it after a while. No, it was like, it was reversed. The man had to stay home. The woman, he got furloughed and the woman ended up getting a job in advertising. So she started going to work every day. She was a stay at home Okay, so he he was like fucking up shit like he fucked up the washing machine all kind of stuff It was funny though night. He messed up like how to take them to school like he was all lost and stuff

That's what's funny. Yeah No, listen any so so I do think there is a lesson that many to know for women who actually take care of the house. There definitely needs to be a real gratitude because that ain't no pump. Cooking and cleaning and shit and caring for children on a consistent, that's tough. Yes. But it gotta be an appreciation. And that's the point. It needs to be gratitude.

It's not enough gratitude. Imagine you making some food, nigga telling you like, yeah, I could cook my own food. That shit would make you feel some food nigga telling you like, yeah, I could cook my own food. That shit would make you feel it. Oh, yeah. Well, yeah, especially that I made this or you supposed to cook the food. Right. Oh, yeah. No. And that becomes your attitude. So you got to define it in yourself. That's the trick. You have to define it in yourself. Take the ego out.

Women definitely don't need pride or ego in a, in a, in a, in a, um, and why they're dating a man. You need pride ego if you taking care of yourself. I mean, you definitely need it when you take care of yourself, but you don't need it. If you have a man taking care of you that that ain't gonna work for you. but you don't need it if you have a man taking care of you. That ain't gonna work for you. Well, both people do need gratitude. I agree with that. Like that's, I think there's men

who don't really have the right gratuitous attitude towards their old lady for, you know, carrying the, you know, turning the house into a home. That's just, to maintain a home is some shit. Maintaining a home is some shit. It's not no pump. Yes, I agree. Had enough of this country?

Ever dreamt about starting your own? I planted the flag. This is mine, I own this. It's surprisingly easy. 55 gallons of water, 500 pounds of concrete. Or maybe not. No country willingly gives up their territory. Oh my God.

What is that? Bullets. Listen to Escape from Zakistan. We need help! That's Escape from Z-A-Q-istan on the iHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Mike Tyson's journey to recovery reminds us that no fight is easy. With every bumpy start, each setback and moments that could have broken him, he kept pushing forward.

I never knew what the spiral was coming up in my life. I never knew I was going to have deep just hopelessness and how so many millions of people feel like that but have no help. Listen to the CINO show on America's number one podcast network, iHeart. Open your free iHeart app and search the CINO show and start listening. Hey, Beau. Hey, Matt. Can you believe we have a whole bunch of wicked episodes coming up? Oh, I can't wait to share all of these amazing episodes with the readers, ktis, publicists, and finalists.

That's right. We're talking all things behind bringing this iconic musical to the big screen. And of course we're taking you inside the world of this epic movie with all the exclusive details you won't hear anywhere else. It's Wicked in a way you've never heard before. Don't miss it.

And be sure to go watch Wicked in theaters starting November 22nd. Listen to Lost Culturistas on the iHeartRadio app, Apple podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Hey, what's up? This is Ramses Jha. And I go by the name Q Ward. And we'd like you to join us each week

for our show Civic Cipher. That's right. We discuss social issues, especially those that affect black and brown people, but in a way that informs and empowers all people. We discuss everything from prejudice to politics to police violence. And we try to give you the tools to create positive change in your home, workplace,

and social circle. We're going to learn how to become better allies to each other, so join us each Saturday for Civic Cipher on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcast, or wherever you get your podcast. Hey there, I'm Dr. Maya Shankar, and I'm a scientist who studies human behavior. Many of us have experienced a moment in our lives that changes everything, that instantly

divides our life into a before and an after. On my podcast, A Slight Change of Plans, I talk to people about navigating these moments. Their stories are full of candor and hard-won wisdom, and you'll hear from scientists who teach us how we can be more resilient in the face of change.