The Breakfast Club - The Breakfast Club BEST OF(Mel Robbins, Dawn Staley, And Tank Interview, Arguments in Relationships Topic)

Episode Date: July 7, 2025

Best of 2025- BEST MOMENTS - Mel Robbins, Dawn Staley, And Tank Interview, Arguing With Spouse Topic. Recorded 2025. YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@BreakfastClubPower1051FMSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

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Till I made it. Hey, bro, I'm on Breakfast Club. Y'all feeding like I've made it right now. I love you guys. You guys are family. People watch the Breakfast Club for news and really be tuned in. Yo, NTVs are quite challenging. Yeah, somebody gotta do it. It's likeTVs are quite challenging. Yeah, somebody gotta do it. It's like, I watch y'all show in the morning. Like, you guys have the voices of the morning.

Quick, baby! DJ Envy, Jess Hilarious, Charlamagne the God. Everyone just kept telling me to prep for this. It's getting crazy and scary and spooky and hilarious. Crazy and scary and spooky and hilarious. It's a new day! Preparation crazy scary spooky hilarious crazy scary spooky This is your time to get it off your chest Wake up whether you're mad or blessed time to get up and get some call up now 800-585-1051 we want to hear from you on the breakfast club

Hello, who's this? Get it off your chest on the Breakfast Club. Hello, who's this? Monique, how are you? Good morning mama. Get it off your chest. I should've said anonymous, but it's too late now. Definitely too late. What's up? You noticed the radio, can't nobody see you. So you can call me and be like, my name's Sally.

I get it, but what I'm about to say, everybody gonna know. Okay. Go ahead, just say it, go for it. I do it all the time. Envy and Charlemagne, I know you probably don't remember but about a year ago I got to on the radio and I was fucking on the phone with my boo. And y'all was like put him on the phone and I was like nah he on the other phone so I couldn't do it. But I need him to leave me alone now. Damn. Damn before you wanted him now it's over it's a wrap. You say what?

I said before you wanted him now it's a wrap. It's a wrap like leave it alone. I said before you wanted him now it's a wrap. I said before you wanted him now it's a wrap. I said before you wanted him now it's a wrap. I said before you wanted him now it's a wrap. I said before you wanted him now it's a wrap. I said before you wanted him now it's a wrap.

I said before you wanted him now it's a wrap. I said before you wanted him now it's a wrap. I said before you wanted him now it's a wrap. I said before you wanted him now it's a wrap. I said before you wanted him now it's a wrap. I said before you wanted him now it's a wrap. I said before you wanted him now it's a wrap. I said before you wanted him now it's a wrap. I said before you wanted him now it's a wrap. I said before you wanted him now it's a wrap. I said before you wanted him now it's a wrap. I said before you wanted him, now it's over. It's a wrap. You say what?

I said before you wanted him, now it's a wrap. It's a wrap. Like leave it alone. Why? Baltimore dudes are trash. You said Baltimore dudes? She sure did. Yes.

For real? Yeah, for real, for real. You don't agree with her? Yeah, I agree with her. Damn. So I need Joseph A*****a to leave the house. I need Joseph A*****a to leave the house. I need Joseph A*****a to leave the house.

I need Joseph A*****a to leave the house. I need Joseph A*****a to leave the house. I need Joseph A*****a to leave the house. I need Joseph A*****a to leave the house. I need Joseph A*****a to leave the house. I need Joseph A*****a to leave the house. You don't agree with her? Yeah, I agree with her. Damn. So I need Joseph to leave me alone without my phone. Don't text call. Don't stop me on social media. Don't leave me alone. Let it go.

It's over. I would hope that y'all had this conversation before you called the radio. Right, damn. Say again? I said I would hope that y'all would have this conversation before he called the radio. Right, damn. Say again? I said I would hope that y'all would have this conversation before he called the radio. Oh well, I told him.

I had to tell him yesterday. I was like, leave me alone, dude. What happened? You think he got so many women? He was cheating. He just, not, yeah, he, he, uh. I'm sorry. Well listen, you can't be having unprotected sex

with a person and you know. Yeah. Thank you. That's what I tried to tell him, he don't get it. Talk about you. Talk about you. It takes two to do that, man. No, no, he's the one that's having multiple.

Oh, got you. So he gave you a yeast infection or something? Oh, well, we don't want to go there, but. Damn, damn. I get it, all right. You know what I'm saying? Like, yeah, like, and I live in another state. Like, if you wanna go out and, man,

she just smashed somebody with a condom, that's cool, because I don't ever know. So we caught you just passing through, and that's how he got you. Damn. What you get? What did you wind up getting? I'm sorry

Common case of chlamydia. Is it curable? I did a little common case of chlamydia. I get it. Is it curable? Of course chlamydia curable. I'm not talking about chlamydia, I'm talking about what she got is it curable? She got chlamydia, she just told you. Yeah, she's saying the razzle dazzle.

Oh, I don't know what the razzle dazzle, I don't know what it's like. I don't know what razzle dazzle means. It's definitely curable, you know, but just throwing your stuff off, that's normally what it is, just throwing off the cage. I get it, I get it.

Like, you messing with some dirty girls. Yeah, yeah. Well, I'm sorry, mama. Well, we wish you the best, and I hope that he does leave you alone. I hope it. I get it. He messing with some dirty girls. Yeah. Yeah. Well, I'm sorry mama. We wish you the best and I hope that he does leave you alone. I hope he falls all the way back. You just put him on blast. You put his whole name out there. Hopefully he leaves you alone. And hopefully the girls that he listen, that's listening, he leave him alone too because they got the razzle dazzle too then. Damn. Jesus. Good morning. Who's this? Good morning. Good morning, Brecht and Sle. This is Uber Mike. How y'all doing? Uber Mike. What's up, King?

What's up? What's going on? Hey, Charlamagne, you always promoting your Black Effect podcast? Yes, sir. Black Effect Podcast Network. How can, because I have one for two years on Spotify. How do I like unite with you talking about ride sharing and how to navigate like safety situations for drivers and you should have been to the black effect podcast festival You could have pitched your podcast at the Nissan activation man. They had a picture probably there next year I promise okay next year for sure, okay Yeah, but I just want to help drivers navigate because a lot of drugs can get killed and how to navigate

You know, this is my step seventh year with over 25,000 trips so I just want to you know like give some options and stuff for drivers how to move how to navigate that's good information man um hit up black effects DM we got the go on Instagram at black effect hit up hit up that DM okay I'll do that alright brother get it off your chest 800-585-1051 if you need to vent hit us up now. It's the Breakfast Club. Good morning This is your time to get it off your chest whether you're mad or blessed 800-585-1051 we want to hear from you on the Breakfast Club Hello

Hey Kelsey, good morning Good morning. I'm Hey, Kelsey. Good morning. Get it off your chest. Kelsey. Good morning. So I'm calling from Atlanta. Good morning, Jess. Good morning, DJ Envy. Good morning, Charlamagne. Good morning. He's Kelsey.

Good morning, boo. I'm so excited. I called you guys. My daughter said this was lame for me to call her and to get off my chest. What you excited about? But anyways, I'm excited just to call in for the radio. Talk to you guys.

I'll listen to you guys every morning on my way to work. Okay. Nice, that's sweet. Thank you, girl. Thank you very much. So I'm calling to get off my chest. So it's very hard dating in Atlanta. I'm new to the area. So not only do I have to dodge the undercover, the DL men.

Oh, you smell the doodle with the BB? What? That is so trash. I also have to under- I have to dodge, like, the princesses. The studs. You know, the men that want you to run after them. Oh.

Oh. So, I recently just kind of got blocked by this guy. So, I guess, like, online dating is kind of like the way or another way to kind of get out there and see what you see. So, I signed up on this app, had been talking to this guy online, just texting. We hadn't met in person or anything like that. Just text him. So I decided to do my little due diligence and look him up online

just to kind of see if he really is who he say he is. And I guess he discovered that I looked him up online because after a good week of talking nothing weird nothing like that He checked out to be who he was he decided he was gonna block me. What did you do? I didn't do nothing but look him up I guess he discovered that I had went on his Instagram and I checked his LinkedIn you got to make sure he employed She probably looked at her story, you know, you know when you look at somebody's story you can see their name right? So I'm guessing he does,

so you be looking at his stuff. What's wrong with his stuff? But so what, if you getting to know him, why, what it matter? Exactly, so I feel like he's being weird. Oh yeah, nah, he gay. What? Yeah, he got another life.

Or something he's hiding and he's not trying to tell me or something. Yeah, he might have another family. He might have a family, he ain't gotta be gay, Jess. Well, bisexual. It is Atlanta, my bad. I'm bisexual. Right, right, right. If you're using the proper context,

who is that? Well, actually, he doesn't live in Atlanta. He's from Augusta, but still, same difference. This is an hour and so away. He's certified bisexual. Yeah, you come to Atlanta, get your fair share of deed and drive back to Augusta. Nobody even know.

Right. This is crazy. Because I'm like, he ghosted me, he didn't say nothing. Like we had just like had a conversation on Friday. Saturday, I'm blocked. What the f***? Either he got, it's all good. Either he got another family or he got a boyfriend.

I think he probably got another family, mama. And it might be a family of boys. Well yeah. I mean, but it's all good, it's all good. It is all good. Get it off your chest. 800-585-1051. If you need to vent, hit us up now. It's The Breakfast Club.

Good morning. The Breakfast Club. Good morning, everybody. It's D-E-J-N-V, Jess Hilarious, Charlamagne Nagawe. We are The Breakfast Club. Lauren LaRosa filling in for Jess. We got a special guest in the building. Yes, indeed.

Seems like he's trying to take our job, doing all these interviews and stuff. Ladies and gentlemen, we have R&B singer, T-Mex, and the band. We have a special guest in the building. Yes indeed. Seems like he trying to take our job doing all these interviews and stuff. Ladies and gentlemen, we have R&B singer Tank. Tank.

I'm not trying to take your job. You're doing a phenomenal job. Yes you are. No. Yes you are. I am just catering to my people. I'm making sure that my community has a place to go, that the conversation is bridged from the old to the new.

I love it. You know what I love about the R&B Money podcast? There's always so many hip hop podcasts, and you know the rappers got a place to go, the OG rappers got a place to go. R&B Money has created that space for the R&B world. And now the R&B Music Awards. Oh, I didn't know about that.

Tell us about it, what do you mean? You guys have a dedicated, hip hop, not you. Hip hop has a dedicated award show. Right. Whereas the R&B dedicated award show, so that we can cover the entire gambit of R&B. R&B is so many things. It's so vast.

You can't cover it in two to three categories at some award show and think that that's going to do it all justice. Oh, I want to hear about this now. Are you creating this? I want to know the category. As an R&B icon like you are, what are the categories of R&B? Because all we think is R&B. Let's go soul. You get into the songwriter aspect of it, the producer aspect of it, the songwriter aspect of it, the producer aspect of it, even the performance aspect of it. You know?

Yes. All of these things are so different. Like a Jill Scott is way different from... Summer Walker. From a Summer Walker. You know what I mean? It's way different. A Calvin Richardson is way different from Chris Brown.

Right. You know what I mean? And so how do we create these tiers and levels to where all of the nuances of R&B can be recognized? Give me an example of progressive. Oh, CB is progressive. OK, OK.

Completely. Gotcha, gotcha. He's the current state of R&B music. Gotcha. You know what I mean? Even if we want to say what Drake and Party just did, you know what I mean? That's very progressive R&B. You know what I mean?

If you want to say what is more traditional, Drake and Party just did. You know what I mean? That's very progressive R&B. You know what I mean? If you want to say what is more traditional, I'm more in the middle of a traditional, progressive R&B artist. Because I can do a record with Chris Brown, but I can also do a record with God rest his soul, Angie Stone. See, I like the traditional.

And I said that when the Party and Drake album dropped. I was like, that ain't for me. And they was like, well, you know, it's for the ladies because it's R&B. I'm like, no, guys like R&B. I just don't like that type of R&B. Exactly. Exactly There's a difference and so we have not had the conversation about all of these things together We just say best R&B album and then you got Chris Brown in a same category with Robert Glasper It's like how do you do that?

We're not all just one thing. So when are you doing this? Is it thought out to that where it's going to happen? It's been great conversations, you know what I mean? Me and my brother, Jay Valentine, we've actually had this conversation with Jesse Collins. And so, you know, all of this what I'm doing right now is just kind of creating the anticipation and the desire and hopefully enough comments will come and people will see the value because that's where it starts. People have to see the value in what we do in order to create this next level platform.

Well don't leave Black Effect and I Heart out the conversation. You know, I Heart is known to put together a good award show. Well what do you want to do? I want to help with the R&B Money Award Show. That would be fantastic. There you go. Done. I want to know how is it for you, right, knowing all these R&B stories, right? And I'm watching your podcast and I know you know the answers

but some of these times it hasn't been put out there and you're just feeding the person, right? Like I look at Stephen Hill with the Chris Brown situation. Yeah. You're leading him because you knew what happened but making him explain the story was amazing. I didn't know what happened. Really? I didn't even know he was part of it. I knew from Chris's side that they had got him all the way to the point of where it was about to happen. It was about to happen and then pulled the rug out from under him. I didn't know the intimate details and who all was involved. And hearing Steve, like, Stephen is like, you know, he loves, he loves that. He loves it.

He felt like he was getting ready to create one of the most iconic moments of all time. And he was. Looking for that rehearsal? Jesus. He was. He was. And it hurt him that now he, you know,

has to go back and tell CB that it's not happening. You know what I mean? Like that crushed him more than anything. And he was like, man, if you could ever talk to him, just let him know I love him. I wanted that for him. I just, they pulled it from me. Nothing I could do. I was going to ask did you put them on the phone after that?

Because he said in your interview that they hadn't gotten a chance. Well, he wanted to see him in person to apologize and stuff like that so no we didn't get a chance to make that happen but but I'd love to make that happen for another one of my favorite R&B money podcast recently was the LA Reid he really sparked a real conversation and it just had me thinking about yes you need you need black boutique everything you need that. We need to be able to operate the way we operate. Just let us do what we do like even with what you guys do. You guys do what you do which is why it is what it is. There's nobody

micromanaging or policing you. You get your paycheck whatever that is but it's because of how you do your thing. Nobody's interrupting that, which is why it's what, how many years in the making? 15. 15, yeah. Jesus Christ. Imagine if you had no control of that, you know what I mean? Imagine you being subject to somebody else's ideas, somebody else's, and then you lose with that.

That hurts worse than anything. I lost listening to you. No, no, I'm going to go down with me. Word. I I'm gonna go down with me. And that's what we've lost. We've lost the people that have done it from here. I just believe, like think about D'Angelo's Untitled. If somebody just doesn't say, ah, I just feel like this is different. They never get to the third single Which is a life-changing record. We'll have that no more. I analytics say I were losing here. We're done Right. Well, how does it feel with a new third single was it? How does it feel with the third single? The butt naked video was his third single Wow. I did not know that how do we not get to that?

single Wow I did not know that how do we not get to that one of the greatest songs of all time I did not know that Wow you know what I mean genuine so anxious if Joe more didn't say we got to get to this one we got to get to this one this one right here is gonna change it trust me maybe I deserve was my second single if we were just going off of first singles, I'm not even going to name the first song I had out there. I was dancing and flipping and blowing up. You were shitting? Yeah.

We'll take first single. Why would you? Because I remember Maybe I Deserve. I shouldn't have brought that up. When you said it, I just heard the song. Freaky? No, maybe I heard. I'm shitting my life.

Yeah. My first single was called Freaky. Oh, okay. And it almost destroyed my career before it even started. Who picked that single? The label? The label picked it but I was very excited about it as well. When I Googled it it said, a song many have missed. It's his actual first single Freaky which came out first and has pretty much become obscure today.

When was the last time you performed that, Neva? I was performing the song, I was on promo tour, Fort Valley State, homecoming. And I'm coming out, I got my freaky interlude, they want to get freaky. And then the song starts. And right in the middle of the first hook, these two little cute girls, the first row was like, whack. I was like, and this was in the dat tape era so I couldn't stop it and I sweat it the rest of the song and I never sang that song

again damn I said don't put on the album erase it get rid of this song and we did a hard turn cut the single went, went to Maybe I Deserve, Thank God. Wow. The rest is history. Rest is history. Charlamagne, why Broadway right now? Because you are featured in Alicia Keys' Hell's Kitchen. Why? And it's timing, bro. Because for me, 2025 was the hard pivot into acting. You know, the music thing has been so much of my bread and butter and so much of my focus for so long. I was like, I got to get to the other thing that I love. And

Charlie Mack had always been telling me, bro, you're going to have to make a hard pivot in order to really do it the right way. And I was like, okay, I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna do it. And with 2025 coming in the way that it did and having a free moment and opportunity, I'd always heard horror stories about Broadway. You know what I mean? Just in terms of the workload. Yeah, and the pay. The pay, the facility, all of that.

And I was like, yeah, I'll probably never do Broadway. And then I get, you know, we get this call from Alicia, like, hey, Alicia's looking for you to do, you know, it's kids. I'm like, what? And I'm like, you know, the name Alicia Keys is already like, that's interesting. Gotta at least see what that's about, what? And I'm like, you know, the name Alicia Keys is already like, that's interesting. Gotta at least see what that's about, right?

And so they sent some papers over for me to look at and I'm like, okay, I'm looking at it. I'm like, all right, I'll go see, you know what I mean? Just out of respect for that name itself. So you went to go watch the play before you? Absolutely. Okay, so you saw when Brandon V. Dixon was playing? Absolutely, well, he wasn't there. All right, all right. His sub was there. Got you Absolutely. Okay, so you saw when Brandon V. Dixon was playing? Absolutely.

Well, he wasn't there. All right, all right. His sub was there. Gotcha, gotcha, gotcha. Who's dope as well. And I watched the play and I fell in love with it. And the next day was actually my walk-in audition. And so I kind of-

Show me how good it can get today, God. And show the rest of the world what we already know. It can't get no better than being hella black, hella queer, and hella Christian. My name is Joseph Rees. I am the creator and host of hella black, hella queer, hella Christian. A fully black, fully queer, fully human, fully divine podcast that explores society, culture, and the intersections of faith and identity. Listen to hella black, hella Queer, Hella Christian to hear conversations about what it means

to sound the way you look. I think what I've had to make peace with is that every iteration of my voice is given to me by God, and I love it. Books that validated our identity. The library now for me is a safe space as someone who is writing books that they're trying to take off of shelves.

And how we as Black queer folks relate to our Christianity. Listen to Hella Black, Hella Queer, Hella Christian on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. So what happened at Chappaquiddick? Well, it really depends on who you talk to. There are many versions of what happened in 1969 when a young Ted Kennedy drove a car into a pond.

And left a woman behind to drown. There's a famous headline, I think, in the New York Daily News. It's, Teddy escapes, blonde drowns. And in a strange way, right, that sort of tells you. The story really became about Ted's political future, Ted's political hopes. Will Ted become president?

Chappaquiddick is a story of a tragic death and how the Kennedy machine took control. And he's not the only Kennedy to survive a scandal. The Kennedys have lived through disgrace, affairs, violence, you name it. So is there a curse? Every week we go behind the headlines and beyond the drama of America's royal family. Listen to United States of Kennedy on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Adventure should never come with a pause button. Remember the movie pass era where you could watch all the movies you wanted for just $9?

It made zero sense and I could not stop thinking about it. I'm Bridget Todd, host of the Tech Podcast, There Are No Girls on the Internet. On this new season, I'm talking to the innovators who are left out of the tech headlines, like the visionary behind MoviePass, Black founder Stacey Spikes, who was pushed out of MoviePass, the company that he founded.

His story is wild and it's currently the subject of a juicy new HBO documentary. We dive into how culture connects us. When you go to France, or you go to England, or you go to Hong Kong, those kids are wearing Jordans, they're wearing Kobe's shirt, they're watching Black Panther. And the challenges of being a Black founder. Close your eyes and tell me what a tech founder looks like.

They're not going to describe someone who looks like me and they're not going to describe someone who looks like you. I created There Are No Girls on the internet because the future belongs to all of us. So listen to There Are No Girls on the internet on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Kelly Harnett spent over a decade in prison

for a murder she says she didn't commit. I'm 100% innocent. While behind bars, she learned the law from scratch. Because oh God, Harnett, jailhouse lawyer. And as she fought for herself, she also became a lifeline for the women locked up alongside her. You're supposed to have faith in God, but I had nothing but faith in her. So many of these women had lived the same stories. I said, were you a victim of domestic violence?

And she was like, yeah. But maybe Kelly could change the ending. I said, how many people have gotten other incarcerated individuals out of here? I'm going to be the first one to do that. This is the story of Kelly Harnett, a woman who spent 12 years fighting not just for her own freedom, but her girlfriends too. I think I have a mission from God to save souls by getting people out of prison.

The Girlfriends, Jailhouse Lawyer. Listen from July 14th on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts. Knew where I needed to be. And, and at that point, it was just like, I think it's time I think, I think it is, it has answered the question for me. I, you know what I mean? Me and Lulu, my manager Lulu was talking to me, he's like, it just does something different for you, brother. It just does something really different. And in deliberating, I was just deliberating, like, is this the time to just take a hard left and out of nowhere, Charlie Mack calls me,

hadn't talked to in a minute. And he's like, what's going on, bro? I'm like, nothing, just chilling. He wanted to come to my Atlantic City show. I'm like, oh, I got you. Look, he said, I said, the magic question. I got this on the table right now. And he said, what the fuck are we talking about?

I said, well, I'm asking you, you don't need my opinion. You know what you're supposed to do. There was that, and here I am. And so, you know, when I sat with Alicia the other day, her and Adam Blackstone, and she was like, Tank, I just felt like it was you. I didn't know why. She was like, it was, it just, to tank, I just felt like it was you. It's like, I didn't know why she was like, it was, it just, to me, it just felt like it was you.

And she's like, I didn't even know if you could act. And I was like, wow, you ain't, you ain't seen me on lifetime or BT, you know what I'm saying? Or TV one. I'm the Denzel of that space. You know what I'm saying? Denzel of that space. I'm the Denzel of that space.

You ain't seen none of that, but she had never seen me act. And she was like, and then when I saw you in the audition She was like I was just blown away and I was like no that's that's what I do Singing is that's whatever and so she and I went back and forth singing back and forth hers you know singing her amazing catalog and My debut on Tuesday and so now it's like how tough is real how tough is it the rehearsals and you have to shut everything else off and

Time for yourself now because it just seems like a doesn't stop. I'm a machine So I'm a routine guy. You know what I mean? So I'm a get up help get the kids to school do cardio eat Go to the gym do the second lift go the studio, either work on music or do pod, get back, eat dinner with the family, get some wife time in, and the next day do the same thing. I'm a machine, I'm built like that. So Broadway schedule works perfect for who I am. Now eight shows a week, crazy. That's where it get different. Because, you's where it get different because you know, they call it you know you have an A show, a B show, and a C show in terms of how you perform. I've never been able to do a B show and feel good about it. Like because all of those people,

whether it's a Wednesday or Saturday, They spent their money to see something great. They spent their money to see somebody go all out. So I'm doing A shows from Tuesday to Sunday. And we got one day off, that's Monday. And right back to it. What's your rest day like on a Monday? Like are you vocal testing? I don't know.

Oh you don't? We haven't done it yet. I just debuted. Oh yeah you just started Tuesday. So I'm gonna have my first Monday, next Monday. What is your vocal testing or? I don't know. You haven't done it yet. I just debuted. Oh yeah, you just started Tuesday. So I'm gonna have my first Monday, next Monday. What's your plans? Nothing. Go to the gym, you know what I'm saying?

Eat some cool food somewhere. You know, maybe keep with Charlamagne and Nahar and talk about this. Let's do it. R&B awards. There you go. What about the family? Family was just here, they came for the debut.

My mom came up, wife, Zoe and Zion came up and it was really, really cool man. The 13 weeks is a long time to be away from the family. Especially if you got a routine like you say. It's tougher for them than it is for me because for me I'm hyper focused, I'm in it and I have something to do every day, something to look forward to. And so, the wife is at home doing the kid thing and all that, but that's why, it's a team.

She holds that down, I'm gonna hold this down. But this to me is like, was the opportunity for people in that space to understand that I'm serious about going here. Kevin was in town the other day, so I went and saw him and chopped it up with him, and he was like, I'm really, really proud of you for making this move.

It says a lot about the next level of where you can go and who you can be, and so that's what I'm looking forward to. That's what it is. So you got shows tonight? Yeah. Oh, shit. We gotta get Tank out of here.

Yeah, I'm being, no, I'm, yeah. Check out Tank at Hell's Kitchen. We appreciate you for Tank out of here. Yeah, I'm being, no, no. I'm, yeah. Check out Tank at Hell's Kitchen. We appreciate you enjoying this, too, man. Hold on, hold on. One more thing, too. Saturday, April 26 is the third annual Black Effect Podcast Festival. Yeah.

Can you make it? Huh? Can you make it? Yeah, it's a Saturday. Tank and Jay Valentine are going to be there. He's got, he's got. I'll be there. I got one day off.

That's right. Oh, that's it. OK, just making sure. One day. Have y'all thought about what that's going to look like live, R&B Money podcast on stage? Nope. Nope. We're thinking about it, though making sure. One day. Have y'all thought about what that's gonna look like live, R&B Money podcast on stage? Nope, nope, we're thinking about it though. Yeah.

Cause it's gotta be sexy, you know what I'm saying? Y'all gonna be singing? Why you gotta sing? You don't have to, I just wanna know. We're doing a podcast, ma'am. He sings on a podcast. I do, I do sing on a podcast. If the spirit moves him.

If it moves me, then I promise you. Amen, I feel like Atlanta God be moving a lot of things down there. Yeah you know we gotta we gotta we gotta figure out what that's gonna cause this will be you know this would be our first time doing it like we do it. Oh this is your first time doing it live? Well we've done R&B live R&B money live the event where it's been strictly catered where it's band DJ you know karaoke vibes like they're really really dope we've done that up in Phoenix at Stadium with one of my guys 2Spot so and DJ, you know, karaoke vibes, like really, really dope. We've done that up in Phoenix,

that stadium where one of my guys, Two Spot. So we've done that. But this is for people who like the podcast and enjoy the conversation. Exactly, so this is podcast and conversation. So in terms of trying to figure out what makes ours a little different, you know what I mean, we're still formulating that.

Well, Saturday, April 26, third annual Black Effect podcast Festival. Go get your tickets blackeffect.com slash podcast festival. Make sure you check our tank in Hell's Kitchen with Alicia Keys on Broadway right now. We appreciate you brother. I'm reporting on y'all man if y'all don't show up. I'm pulling up. I'm putting up on Broadway all the time. That's one of my, I enjoy Broadway. Absolutely. Okay. And when I'm not here, you know what I'm saying, I still want to hear Broadway. Absolutely. Okay. And when I'm not here, you know what I'm saying? I still want to hear somebody say, have you seen Hell's Kitchen? Did you go? Did you? You know? I'll make me tell Alicia in Swiss. We'll meet there. Good job. And make sure you subscribe to the

R&B Money Podcast on the Black Effect iHeart Radio Podcast Network. That's right. It's Tank, ladies and gentlemen. It's The Breakfast Club. Good morning. I know it now. I know it now. I know it now. I know it now. I know it now. I know it now. I know it now. I know it now. I know it now.

I know it now. I know it now. I know it now. I know it now. I know it now. I know it now. I know it now. I know it now.

I know it now. I know it now. I know it now. I know it now. I know it now. I know it now. I know it now. I know it now.

I know it now. I know it now. I know it now. I know it now. I know it now. I know it now. DJ envy just hilarious Charlemagne the guy we are the breakfast club laura rosa filling in for Jess now If you're just joining us we're talking about Swiss beats He did an interview with us weekly and he was talking about his relationship with his wife They've been married 15 years and he says it's a healthy marriage and he said what keeps it so healthy is he said first They don't yell at each other and they said we've never had an argument So that is the question eight hundred five eight five one oh five one have you never had an argument. So that is the question, 800-585-1051, have you never had an argument with your spouse?

I can't say that's true for me. Me and my wife have argued. You know, we argue. I mean, it doesn't get to the point where we're yelling and screaming and kicking, but we do argue, you know? We disagree and we have arguments. It's impossible.

I mean, I salute the Swiss and Alicia, respect to them if they don't argue, but I think that, you know, I can't, that is not my household. You know what I mean? Like, you know, we have very healthy debates. We have arguments. We got four kids, different parenting styles, I guess. Right.

But you know, we try to come on one accord to have one solid parenting style. But yeah, there's always be things that you argue about that don't make it unhealthy. That don't make that you got that don't mean you got a bad relationship. It's just that, you know, that mean that you live with a person. Yeah. And like I said, I've been with my wife 31 years. We've been married 23. We argue. Like we, there's things like you said, like I might discipline my children this way or talk to my children this way. She does it this way. And we go back and forth. But like I said, it ain't to the point where we yelling and screaming and she's sleeping in another room. No, we have disagreements.

No, and sometimes you do have to tell the wife that don't talk to me like I'm your child. I know your wife be getting with you. All the time. You're annoying. All the time. But if I think sometimes, you know, women, especially when they have a lot of kids,

they're used to talking a certain way and men can be immature at times. So we get spoken to in that way. And sometimes you just have to remind them I am not your child. Envy you get spoken to, you have to tell Giddy up. I have to a couple of times. I'm not your child. I can see that too.

Absolutely. Yes. I mean but I'm here with you every day. I kind of feel for your wives. No, you should feel for us. Okay? I'm sure you should feel for us. But really, I mean listen, once again, respect the Swits and Alicia.

If they don't argue, God bless. I don't know if that's realistic. I really don't. Even with the most healthiest, healed couples, I don't know if that's realistic for you to never argue. You never nothing? Like y'all agree on everything is never a disagreement? Yeah, I don't know.

Hello, who's this? Yo, this is Grant Michaels, the author. Hey, what's up, Grant Michaels, the author. Talk to us. Man, what's happening, man? Y'all can't be serious, man. Me and my wife have been married for 12 years. We've been together since 15.

We've never had an argument. I'm never saying we don't disagree, but we have never had an argument like this. That's my home. That's my place of peace, my sanctuary. Why the hell would I want to bring this course of immaturity into it? Well, God bless for all of you. Y'all way more healed than me and my household then. Or maybe it's just me. Maybe I'm the problem.

You know what I'm saying? We live in Columbia, South Carolina. Chief of Allendale. Charlamagne, you know about Allendale. Yeah, I was in the Mac Monday. I ain't trying to get nothing. Oh, that's what's up, man. I ain't trying to get cut.

So that's how it started initially. You know what I'm saying? As we grew, it just became the norm. Like, as a black man, we got so much **** going on in the world. Like, why do I have to come home to further foolishness? You feel me? So you never had a heated argument

or disagreement with your wife? All my life, never never god bless my brother I need that I need to get to where you at. They said never yell I've never had any argument their kids have never seen them cuss at each other. I don't know I don't believe that suit everybody in the metro to the 803 hot 103 9. That's the station. We on out there Hello, who's this? Yeah, we'll you wish a good making what's shaking? You were shaking bacon. What's shaking bacon? I don't want no pork on my pork, sir.

What's up, bro? No, no pork, no pork. So first, Envy, I want to say, what's up, Envy? I met you before. I was EP on Stiles' 22 Convict when we did the video down in Slate down in the city. OK. When he was there with, when he even did the video there.

And now to the topic, I do believe that you can be in a marriage and not argue with a woman, right? Because nowadays when you say argument, the first thing people think about is somebody blowing a gasket. You know, you start arguing, you're screaming at each other, but there's a difference between arguing

and having a solid, strong discussion. Because I've been with my woman eight years, and we don't argue. We just have a real solid, in-depth conversation to kind of get our point across. I think if you can get your point across that way, I think you don't need to argue with people. So I believe that he can be in a marriage,

especially while they look like two low-keys, down-to-earth people that you can sit and speak to. Why would it be so hard to believe that? Let me look up what's the definition of argument. I don't know what the argument is. That's what I just did. It says, opposing views typically are heated or angry, disagreeable. But the fact that you gotta go into it, It says that's what I just did it says

The fact that you gotta Google that to see what it is it's because when you think of argument That's exactly what comes up to your head. It's like an argument like you screaming your volumes at a tent No, it says an argument is an exchange of diverging or opposite views typically are heated are angry one. I of diverging or opposite views typically are heated, are angry one. What Swizz is saying is that they disagree, but it doesn't get heated. Like they don't allow it to get heated. But the argument is back and forth. Like I had an argument with my dad the other day, right?

It wasn't, we weren't yelling and screaming, but he had a view about something. I had a view about something and it was heated. But after we laughed it off and kept moving, but it was an argument. Well, he said they do disagree, but their communication style doesn't allow for it to get to level 10.

What is level 10? Well, he didn't actually say level 10. I said level 10, but he's saying- Oh, no, no, I'm saying, but that's what I mean. What is level 10? I don't know- I think it's all the screaming, the yelling, the cussing. Like he said that their kids have never seen them

yell at each other, cuss at each other, those type of things. Oh, no, that ain't, that ain't, no, that ain't, God bless Winston. That ain't my house. I've been here 31 years. I ain't gonna sit here and't my house. I ain't about to sit here and tell y'all no lie like that. What's the last word you've been called Envy? No, we don't call each other names now. But you got to think, I've been with my wife since 16. You're like we've argued, we've yelled, we've screamed, like we've been there. You know what I mean? It is what it is. We've been there, you know, I mean it is what it is Sometimes my kid sometimes my nine-year-old tell us to stop yelling at each other and we both be like we both say we not Yeah

We don't be but you know, I guess I don't know I guess any back-and-forth between parents looks like an argument to kids I don't know eight hundred five eight five one. Oh five one We were talking about Swiss beats and his wife Alicia Keys shout to us wiz and lisha They said they have never argued after 15 years of marriage. Let's discuss. It's the breakfast club. Good morning the breakfast club Morning everybody is DJ envy just hilarious Charlamagne the guy we are the breakfast club Laura Rosa is here as well and we got a special guest in the building Yes, indeed ladies and gentlemen Mel Robbins. Welcome. Hey, it's good to see you. How you feeling? Good morning. I feel great. How are you doing? Bless Black and Holly favorite. This is your first time in this studio. You were here in 2021 when you had a high five theory. Yes. Yes. But now millions of books later, number one podcast in the world right now. Yeah, round of applause. Round of applause, yes. Not bad for a 66 year old woman, you know?

Man, it really feels like you've truly arrived. What do you think, you know, the success, what's made all this new success happen? Well, you know, it's not new success. Like what you're seeing is the result of 15 years of just boring, grueling, daily reps. Like that's what nobody like wants to understand is that you can be successful,

you can achieve anything you want. You just have to be patient. You have to get up out of bed every single day and put one foot in front of the other. You gotta be willing to do the things you don't feel like doing in the dark when nobody's watching. And when you think that it's not gonna happen for you,

that is what it's about. It's about just consistent small moves, being patient. I mean there were so many times where I was just like, am I ever gonna get out of that? Wow. Is anyone ever gonna notice? Like am I ever gonna get invited to the breakfast club? Like when is somebody going to notice? Your spot that you wanted. Well no but, but seriously, like you kind of sit there because I mean, every one of us have had those moments, whether you're putting out music or you're starting a YouTube channel or you started a business,

and it's so easy to look around at what everybody else is doing and think that you're losing some race in life. The real game is with yourself. Can you keep going? Can you say to yourself, and this is kind of how I would keep myself going in those moments

I would say I Refuse to believe that this is how the story ends. I believe that at some point all of this work is going to pay off I don't have to know how I have to believe that it will and if it hasn't yet it's not meant to yet There's some lesson. There's something I'm being held for that I don't know what it is, but if I choose to believe in this moment that things are going to get better, that things are going to turn out for me, that all this hard work is going to pay off, that trying to be a better person is going to pay off, at some point I will look back

on my life and say, oh, that's why it didn't happen then. Oh, that's why it took longer. Oh, that's why. Either you weren't ready, or God, the universe was holding you for a different moment. And so, a lot of people ask me, what is this moment about? I think it's about 15 years of ridiculously hard work becoming a better person. I think it's about 15 years of just chipping away

at getting out of debt and doing better in my marriage and being a better mother and getting control of my emotions and my mental health Chipping away at building a business and I truly believe that I was being held for this moment Like this one thousand percent is my legacy. Let me ask you a question about you talk about the reps Yep for you it worked out and and successful and great What about that person that is just not good? That rapper that is not good. He's trying.

That podcast person that is doing a podcast that is just not good. And everybody thinks they're good. Good to anybody. See, I don't believe that. But when do you stop? Because you're a 60 year old rapper. Maybe. Why can't there be a 90 year old rapper like you know me know maybe why can't there be a 91 90 year old one see maybe

What the rapping is for is maybe it's not about rapping Maybe there is something that you're doing when you are rapping and nobody's coming that is teaching you a lesson about patience Maybe what it's doing is teaching you to believe in yourself when nobody else does. And every time that you show up and nobody's there, every time you post a video on your YouTube channel that only your uncle and your son are subscribed to, every time you post, you're basically saying, you know what, screw the world, I believe in myself. I'm doing this for myself.

And so for me, when you give the example of like the person who's a rapper is just terrible. There there's lots of people out there doing stuff. They're just terrible. What I love is that they felt called to do something. I don't care if they felt called to do it because they wanted to make more money. I mean, hell, I was working five, six jobs back, you know, 15 years ago when we were $800,000 in debt because I needed groceries on the table. I needed gas in the tank. And so motivation to be safe and to make money or because of your table, I needed gas in the tank, and so motivation to be safe and to make money or because of your ambition, that's a beautiful thing. But at some point you're going to go, I'm not that good at this.

But I believe, and this is what I think is super cool about life, absolutely every experience that you have in life is leading you somewhere and teaching you something. And I'm going to, one of the reasons why I share so much about what I've learned and the mistakes that I've made, I'm like the villain in every book is because I'm stubborn. Like it takes a sledgehammer from the universe for me to wake the hell up and stop doing something. Like I literally get so into my groove,

whether it's drinking too much or taking my stress out on my kids or being a jealous, insecure friend, that things have to backfire for me to wake up and go, well, guess I better try something different. But I wanna just set it up about the book, man. There is some books that I believe are must reads in life. The Let Them Theory by Mel Robbins has been added to that must read list.

My wife got it for me a few weeks ago. And the book is just essentially about how you have to stop wasting your life on things that you can't control. When did you get to that level? Oh my God, it was 54. I had slung learner. Yeah, and the funny thing is,

is I'm married to the chillest dude on the planet. I mean, I'm married to a man who is not only Buddhist, he is a death doula. And like when you wanna talk about like a person yeah that can just sit in stillness I'm like a tornado of emotion and so I've always wanted to let things go I've always wanted to not care what people think I've never known how and see when you're stressed or you're easily offended like I used to be or you have a lot going on it is very hard to not get wrapped up in what other people

are thinking and doing. It's very hard to not let what your kids are going through stress you out. And so, you know, I've been trying to do this forever. I mean, this is not a new idea. The serenity prayer is the let them theory. In fact, you know, I sat down with Dr. Martin Luther King III and his wife, Andrea, and they both said we write about it in the let them theory. They both reflect on the fact that this concept that you have to give up control in order

to gain control, that your power is in your response, that this is part of Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.'s legacy, because your response is what dictates who you are. It's not what's happening out there, it's how you respond to it with your thoughts and your actions and how you process your own emotions. And so I did not know this until I was 54 years old and you know for me personally the power of these two words because let them, we've all said let them in our lives a bazillion times. I mean there's a sermon circulating that's 20 years old, T.D. Jakes, doing this let them

sermon. So this is a concept that has been around since the beginning of time and that's why this has resonated. I'm not teaching you something new, I'm reminding you of what you already know to be true. And I'm handing you this tool so you can snap out of this crap where we're constantly worked up about what other people are doing to take our power back. We're still kicking it with Mel Robbins. Lauren.

You talk about managing other people a lot. And I've never heard the term put like that, but you use it to basically talk about how we're so what you're talking about right now. We're worried about other people. But also too, I think it's expectations of other people that we're trying to we're making decisions based around that a lot. When did you realize the this whole scale of like managing other people and learning when the clock out of that job of trying to do that? Well so what is gonna happen is this. So when you start using the let them theory

and it's so easy to use the next time you're stressed out or annoyed or frustrated and it's always with other people just say let them. That's how you use it. Let them. And you're going to immediately feel peaceful. Your mom's in a bad mood. Let her be in a bad mood. Some old friend of yours is talking, let him talk trash. Why?

You're not allowing it. When you say let them, you are reminding yourself there's one thing in life I can't control. It's what other people say, do, believe, feel and some I job to. So when you start saying let them, and you detach yourself from the responsibility of having to manage somebody else, something interesting happens. You realize, oh my God, I've lived my life in reverse.

I actually live my life giving time and energy trying to manage what other people think. I have kept myself in a major or in a relationship or in a situation because I'm afraid to disappoint my parents or my friends. I mean, how many people keep drinking or like keep going out at night when what they really wanna do is launch a business?

And so they don't take the weekends to work on the things that they wanna work on because they feel like they don't wanna disappoint their friends or people are to talk about them. That's you giving power to other people. Another way that we give power to other people is we get so focused on the headlines that we gaslight ourselves into believing that you have no power. It's complete garbage.

Of course you have power. And so when you start saying let them, it's sort of this revelation where you're like, oh my God, I spend so much time and energy worrying about other people. I spent so much time and energy letting them stress me out. But is there a level of like when that becomes easier versus harder? Because when you were just talking, I thought about Michelle Obama. Yes. In the podcast, one of the podcasts she did this week, she was talking about how she realized she was doing a lot for other people not thinking about herself. And she started making decisions for herself. So she's going

places she wants to go do things she people don do. People don't like that. They don't. And they think she's divorced because of it. Yeah. But it's like she's Michelle Obama. So it's hard for her to like the noise is so it's a lot louder for her. Well, of course. But whether or not you pay attention to that is within your control. Whether or not you look at your phone, and we're all guilty of it, whether you are Michelle Obama or you're just going into your middle school. Whether or not you give attention to the gossip, you look for the gossip, you mainline it, that is within your control.

If you say, I can never, ever, ever stop somebody from lying about me, from making up stuff about me, from saying whatever they're gonna say. So why on earth would I spend any time and energy managing it? That's right. And then you go let me, this is the second part of the theory.

Why don't you say let them. Let them think negative thoughts. Let them make up all kinds of crap because if you know you're not getting divorced, what do you care about these idiots saying? What do I tell you all the time? Let me remind myself that I know the truth and when you know the truth about who you are

You don't think about other people when you live your life in a way that makes you proud You don't think about other people now. I tell them this all And I was and I already had the book because I think Eddie had given it to us a minute I said, oh I got the book and for the matter you got it. It will change your damn I'm telling you it will change your life Yes, but you have to get to that stage It's a gulag into this thank you was born that way and I'll take this true Truly cared right but then even when I started to care

I realized things like the serenity prayer little simple things you saw sitting in your grandmother's house You realize that is absolutely the truth God grant me the serenity prayer, those simple things that you saw sitting in your grandmother's house, you realize that is absolutely the truth. God granted me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference. And the easiest way to let go of what you can't control is just realizing you never had control to begin with.

And here's another thing that's really important, this is why you're gonna love it, is that what'll start to happen when you say let them, it's not that you're allowing people to do bad things, they're already doing bad things, you're recognizing that it's not your job to manage other people because this is a book that's about power and control and peace. Show me how good it can get today God and show the rest of the world what we already know. It can't get no better than being hella black, hella queer, and hella Christian. My name is Joseph Rees. I am the creator and host of Hello Black, Hello Queer,

Hello Christian, a fully Black, fully Queer, fully human, fully divine podcast that explores society, culture, and the intersections of faith and identity. Listen to Hello Black, Hello Queer, Hello Christian to hear conversations about what it means to sound the way you look. I think what I've had to make peace with is that every iteration of my voice is given to me by God, and I love it. Books that validated our identity.

The library now for me is a safe space as someone who is writing books that they're trying to take off of shelves. And how we as Black queer folks relate to our Christianity. Listen to Hella Black, Hella Queer, Hella Christian on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. So what happened at Chappaquiddick? Well, it really depends on who you talk to. There are many versions of what happened in 1969 when a young Ted Kennedy drove a car into a pond.

And left a woman behind to drown. There's a famous headline, I think, in the New York Daily News. It's, Teddy escapes, blonde drowns. And in a strange way, right, that sort of tells you. The story really became about Ted's political future, Ted's political hopes. Will Ted become president?

Chappaquiddick is a story of a tragic death and how the Kennedy machine took control. And he's not the only Kennedy to survive a scandal. The Kennedys have lived through disgrace, affairs, violence, you name it. So is there a curse? Every week we go behind the headlines and beyond the drama of America's royal family.

Listen to United States of Kennedy on the iHeartRadio app, Apple podcast, or wherever you get your podcasts. Adventure should never come with a pause button. Remember the movie pass era where you could watch all the movies you wanted for just nine dollars? It made zero sense and I could not stop thinking about it. I'm Richard Todd, host of the Tech Podcast, There Are No Girls on the Internet. On this new season, I'm talking to the innovators who are left out of the tech headlines,

like the visionary behind MoviePass, Black founder Stacey Spikes, who was pushed out of MoviePass, the company that he founded. His story is wild, and it's currently the subject of a juicy new HBO documentary. We dive into how culture connects us. When you go to France, or you go to England, or you go to Hong Kong, those kids are wearing Jordans, they're wearing Kobe's shirt, they're watching Black Panther.

And the challenges of being a Black founder. Close your eyes and tell me what a tech founder looks like. They're not going to describe someone who looks like me, and they're not going to describe someone who looks like you. I created There Are No Girls on the internet because the future belongs to all of us. So listen to There Are No Girls on the internet on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts. Kelly Harnett spent over a decade in prison for a murder she says she didn't commit. I'm 100% innocent.

While behind bars, she learned the law from scratch. Because, oh God, her and that jailhouse lawyer. And as she fought for herself, she also became a lifeline for the women locked up alongside her. You're supposed to have faith in God, but I had nothing but faith in her. So many of these women had lived the same stories. I said, were you a victim of domestic violence? And she was like, yeah. But maybe Kelly could change the ending. I said, how many people have gotten other incarcerated

individuals out of here? I'm going to be the first one to do that. This is the story of Kelly Harnett, a woman who spent 12 years fighting not just for her own freedom, but her girlfriends too. I think I have a mission from God to save souls by getting people out of prison. The Girlfriends, Jailhouse Lawyer. Listen from July 14th on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcast. Then you say, let me remind myself how I respond to things

actually is where my power is. So do I give this any time and energy or not? Do I double down on just living my life in a way that makes me proud of myself, which is where your power is. And the thing that that also changed me dramatically is I couldn't believe how much stress I felt and how I was bracing all the time. And when you start to say let them and you release that kind of obligation

to make other people happy or to make everybody know that you're not divorced or that everything's okay or like, just let them think whatever they wanna think and live your life in a way that makes you proud, you're going to get all this time and energy back and what I love about this is when you're less stressed and when you're not bracing all the time,

because you know your boss is narcissistic. So why on earth would you walk into work assuming that today's gonna be anything other than what it already has always been? Let them be who they are. I love the managing stress chapter and in that chapter you say you can't control how other adults behave and stressing about it diminishes your power. You'll never reach the full potential of your life if you continue to allow stupid things

to rule people to drain your life force. Can you explain? Yes, yes. So the two most important resources that you have in life, time, energy. That's what you got. How you spend your time, where you put your energy, it actually determines your experience of life.

And that's why I say, if you have this experience right now where you're exhausted and overwhelmed and nervous and you're not like feeling like you can ever have time for yourself or your goals just aren't clicking, you're not the problem. The problem is all this time and energy you spend dealing with other people. And so let them is a boundary that you draw where you start to recognize, okay I'm gonna let other people think and feel and do and have their opinions and I'm gonna let them be disappointed. I'm gonna let them misunderstand me and I'm going to let me really take that time and energy back and

pour it into Working on myself and staying in my piece and what I found is that when I'm less stressed Which I am because I'm not allowing Stupid stuff or other people to stress me out. I'm actually a better person I make more money because I can use my brain instead of being in fight or flight. I don't like vomit on my kids, my emotions. Like I used to be the kind of person

that would come in after work and be yelling at everybody or mad at the dog for crying out loud. And then I'd be like, I'm sorry, it was a bad day at work, stressful day at work. What did the dogs say back? You know, they kind of do this and then they come back and they're really nice because they literally, dogs don't like punish you for

that. And it's so sad that I used to leave the worst of me for the people I cared about the most and then blame it on the stress of the day that by the way, when you use the let them theory, you have control over whether or not this stuff gets to you. Mm-hmm Let me let me do I have a question. Yeah chapter five You say let them think bad thoughts about you Right the question with that is when a lot of people sometimes especially on social media, right? Yep Nobody facts checks anymore. Mm-hmm, but that could affect your reputation I can affect your business that could affect the way that kids' teachers look at you or business that comes around.

Of course. So what are you doing those instances? Well, so here, this is a very tricky question because you're talking about the PR and the media swirl. PR is a little bit different. In personal, like I think it's really important to understand who you are, whether you're dealing with rumors at a middle school or you're dealing with rumors in your community or you've got somebody in your family trash-talking you. In order to repair your reputation, it is better to show

than to tell, in my opinion. You prove the truth based on how you show up in life, not based on the words that come out of your mouth. And if there is somebody spreading things about you, the best way to handle it is to go directly to that person and to ask them about it. Because those kind of people, the people that gossip about you ultimately end up crumbling anyway. That's right. Because it always catches up with them. We're still kicking it with Mel Robbins, her new book, The Let Em Theory is out right now.

Charlamagne? You know, you were in the book, you talk about how you felt paralyzed by imposter syndrome, especially know you were in the room you're in. Imposter syndrome means you actually want to be in the room you're in, and there's skills or there's experience that you need to gain in order to dominate in that room. Imposter syndrome is actually not self-doubt, it's ambition. And so... Explain that a bit, because it's always been said the other way. Yeah, and so if you really think about it, if you walk into a room and you don't feel imposter syndrome

It's because you don't want to be in that room You don't care what people think about you in that room If you walk into a room and you feel a sense of imposter syndrome It's because you care about what people think about you in that room It means your ambition wants you to succeed in that room I was like sick like, push to stay sharp. Correct. Because you're trying to, okay.

And also like, hey, I want to actually succeed around people like this, which means what are the skills I need? And what I started to understand, and I think it explains a lot about why I am who I am, is that we're all the same. Everybody is dealing with the same stuff. Yes, it's easier if you have more money and more resources, but at the end of the day everybody's got a family member that they're worried about. Everybody has ambition they're not tapping into. Everybody has things that they want to pursue in their life and they're kind of letting themselves down a little bit. Everybody struggles with a little bit of uncertainty and anxiety at times.

Everybody has hopes and dreams and feels a little discouraged and overwhelmed. And when you start at a baseline that people would love to thrive and people thrive when they can. And if they can't, I believe it's because they're discouraged or there's some skill building or some experience or some mentorship that's missing, that's it. But that you're built to thrive.

And so when you really start at that baseline, like, I make it a practice by the way this is this is one thing that will change your life when you go into a public bathroom two things I always leave the space better than when I found it I always clean up public bathroom depends now no no no no no that's why I don't go into that stall but no cuz that's a let them I gotta got to let, I got it. Well, because if somebody like destroy, especially women, if somebody destroys a seat, pees all over it,

and then they leave, that is a human being that is so disconnected from the interconnection of the human experience. You are leaving that for another person, and so making sure that you don't leave your mess for another person, making sure that you don't leave your mess for another person making sure that you just kind of wipe down the counter and then here's the second thing if there is a human being cleaning that bathroom please look in

the AI and say thank you all the time thank you like that right there is a simple thing that will make you start to shake out of that woe is me or that stress or that overwhelm, let them know you appreciate and see what they're doing because it changes who you are. And then you start to see all day long that there are like, you know, I'm can't look at you because I'm gonna cry. People are just walking around disconnected and the power of starting to be the one that wakes people up. Hey, you know, I hope I always get an elder.

Hey, how's everybody doing? Like, it's shocking how we have gotten so far away from that sense of community. And there's actually research around this. They call it either weak ties. I call them warm connections. Those people that you see in the building every day that you say hello to the person that's walking the dog that you, you know you know the name of the dog in your neighborhood. These relationships matter because they make you feel human again. When you feel the impact from what you're doing

with your book and the Let Them Theory, you just got emotional not even just about your impact, but just talking about just change in the world. How does it make you feel? Do you take a moment just of gratitude and be like... Because I saw all the tattoos in the book and I was like, that's so fire. It's hard to make people like actually believe something that's not tangible. One of the things that, you know, for me, I spent so many years like hating myself and feeling like I was a really bad person. And when you get stuck in life, it's easy to think you're the only one. And so I'm just literally on a mission to share whatever I can share and give people access just like you guys give people access to incredible thinkers and experts and resources.

Your work is reaching some way halfway around the world that doesn't even have a toilet in their house. And how incredible is that? And if I can save anybody the headaches and the heartaches that I caused myself or the people that I care about because I didn't know any better, I didn't know what the problem was, I didn't know how to change myself,

I didn't know how to push through the emotion, that is a life well lived. Why did you hate yourself though? Because you can't do anything about what you don't know. Oh my God, we don't have time. I literally like from the amount of cheating I did when I was little to the Undiagnosed anxiety or the undiagnosed dyslexia and ADHD and how that created tremendous anxiety To the way that childhood trauma impacted me that I didn't even realize was impacting me. Yeah, like it's just chronic I just did not think I was a bad person.

And there's a lot of people walking around that have a hundred times more negative thoughts than they do positive ones. And a lot of people develop a habit of being very self-critical. It's never enough. Like you're never gonna make it. Like you're always so stupid.

Why did you do that? Either because that's how they were talked to when they were little, or because it's this like almost protective thing that if you beat yourself up first, you're going to catch it before other people do. And I got to a point, and this is an important thing, the only thing you need to make your life better is one decision. How I'm living my life right now and how it feels no longer works for me.

That's all you need to know. If you can have the courage to say that to yourself, you now have tipped the first domino because you've made a decision that you want to change how your life feels. You made a decision that you want to change how it feels up here. And for me as a mom, like your kids absorb the way that you treat yourself. And so having two daughters that I started noticing, my God, why are these beautiful young women picking themselves apart? Well, because I do. Why are they so hard on them? Because I was so hard on myself.

That's how they learn it. And so I don't want them to do that to themselves. And you know, the thing I was going to share that's made a huge difference for me is that I keep the impact front and center. And so we send an email out five days a week. There's a person on our team whose job is to assemble all of the things that people are saying all over the world about the books and the podcast. Not about Mel, but about what you learned. And I'll tell you, every day

there's 20 to 30 of them. And just the other day there was a person who talked about how he was a stepdad and the relationship ended and those stepkids were his life and he didn't want to be here anymore and somebody started to share the podcast with him and He would go and take a walk every morning and listen to the podcast and it started to give him a sense of hope And now he uses the let them theory. This is a person that actually works in like a police operations control center Never in a million years would I think this is somebody that's listening to the Mel Robbins podcast

or listening to this kind of conversation. But it goes to prove that everybody wants to do well. Everybody wants to thrive. And you know when you're not doing well. You know when you're not thriving. The problem for most of us is just kind of feeling like I don't think this could change. And the fact is, of course it can change.

If you've ever been happy in your life, you can be happy again. If you've ever been proud of yourself, you can be proud of yourself again. If you've ever forgiven somebody else, you can learn to forgive yourself. And you know, also God doesn't call to qualify it. He qualifies to call it.

And you've been called Mel Robbins. I feel that. I'm a love you man. I love you too. Wow. That's right. Well, we appreciate you for joining us. you Mel thank you all right well let's Mel Robbins it's the Breakfast Club good morning

It goes to a Modesto, California man named Christian Alondra Solario Anguiano. I don't think I pronounced any of that right. Okay. That is a name that ICE agents would have at the top of their list just in case they would monitor a name like that. You know, and honestly with a name like that, he might get sent to El Salvador because he was arrested for sexual battery, burglary, stalking, and assault with the intent to commit a felony. All those charges will get you deported in Trump's America, especially with a name like that.

And it don't even matter if you are an American citizen. Okay? They're going to put you on that deportation flight to El Salvador. But what exactly did Christian Alondra Solorio Anguiano do? Let's go to CBS News for a report please. Got a strange one for you tonight Adam Modesto. The Stanislaus County Sheriff says they've arrested a man last week after he allegedly broke into a woman's home at night then bit and licked her toes while she slept. Let's give you some context. The Sheriff's office says the man arrested seen here,

27 year old Christian Anguiano, have been stalking the woman for months following her home from work several times. Despite a number of people confronting him, deputies say he just wouldn't stop. Would even sleep in the car outside her home. Woman's okay. Anguiano, though, suspects being held on a $325,000 bail. He broke into our house just so he could treat her feet like a churro. Cinnamon swirl, full tongue action, sweet sticky, slightly confusing. Okay, El Toe Liquor Supremo, toe sucking king of the dance floor. How you break into someone's house with sazon for their feet? This man is a telenovela villain.

Okay, first of all, what's the point of stalking? At what point does a man understand this woman don't want you? And what part of your brain makes you believe that breaking into this woman's house and sexually assaulting her toes was gonna make her like you? Okay, I don't know why I got this far. This man was following this woman home after her shifts, sleeping in his car outside her residence, checking her doors to see if they are unlocked to gain entry. If he was doing all of that, he should have been on ICE's radar a long time ago. Somebody should have been put him in handcuffs. This man was confronted by her coworkers to leave her alone, but none of that stopped

him. Okay? The lesson to be learned here is that this incident underscores the importance of taking stalking behavior seriously, and we got to implement stronger protective measures for victims. And by stronger measures, we got to let people get their ass kicked. Okay, that's what I mean by stronger measures. There has to be some sort of community policing that can happen the same way it's citizens arrest. We have to make it okay in certain situations for citizens to put

their foot up other citizens asses. Okay, co workers went to him and told him to cut it out. He was sleeping outside that woman's home. He was checking for unlocked doors at her residence. All of that should equate to a community jumping. Okay, now if that's too extreme for folks, then we gotta enhance legal protections. You gotta have strong laws against stalking and ensure swift actions when victims report they are being stalked. You gotta use stories like this to increase public awareness. We have to educate the public about the signs

of stalking and the importance of reporting suspicious activities and most importantly we got to support the victims. Okay? Provide resources and support systems for people who feel threatened. You can't wait until somebody breaks into somebody's house and turns their toes into tamales to care. Okay? So please give Christian Anguiano the sweet sounds of the hamiltones. You are the donkey of the day. You are the donkey of the day. Yeehaw. Alright, well thank you for that donkey of the day ye heart.

All right. Well, thank you for that donkey of the day. Yes, indeed. The Breakfast Club. Morning, everybody. It's DJ, Envy, Jess, Hilarious, Charlamagne, the guy. We are the Breakfast Club. We got a special guest in the building.

The icon living Dawn Stanley. Welcome back. How you feeling? Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. I usually come back when we win the championship. We lost this year. So thank y'all Uncommon favor is out right now basketball North Philly my mother and the life lessons I learned from all three is out right now. How are you feeling? I'm feeling great I mean my friends have received their books and they have nothing but like great things like my cup runneth over.

They had you all over the place yesterday. Yeah they did. I gotta give you a shout out and you sparked the conversation. So many people have asked me to write a book and I'm like yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, like yeah, right? But it came from so many different people and then when I came on the show in 2022, we talked about it and you just, you kept the conversation going. You're real persistent with it. You know, that's what I'm attracted to most

is like somebody that actually is it. Persistent. Yeah, persistent and know the process. Like you knew the process. I don't know if you knew my story, so to speak, but you knew enough to know that, you know if you knew my story so to speak, but you knew enough to know that this book will be received well and I appreciate that. Well people like you don't come around too often Don. Like you are once in a generation

or just person, you know, and you really learn that when you read the book. Not even just as a coach, but as a basketball player, but more so as a child of Philadelphia, man. I mean, I had fun. Like, the process was fun. It's liberating. It is, you know, you don't really know how you're going to be received, but every person, like, I'm actually waiting for a critic. Like, I'm waiting for somebody to say, what didn't go right in the book? And we have yet to get to that point. And one of my friends was, you know was listening, had a long road trip, listened to the entire book yesterday. And she was like, I'm in tears, I'm laughing. I get it, like the leadership part of it,

like, I mean, the emotions that are in the book. And it's me, so some of it is emotional to me. Some of it is just, I'm able to just get it out because I remembered most of it. And I me. Some of it is just, I'm able to just get it out because I remembered most of it and I had to call on my siblings to kind of fill in the gaps. But it's me, like it's so me. It's so relatable.

It's so, it was an easy process. So was it therapeutic at all to do it? No, it was just natural. It wasn't like, it was natural. I think sharing my story is just relatable to people. It's not like, you know, I don't think it's an overdo it with the accolades. It's like the accolades are intertwined

and everybody's accolades won't be like Olympian and national champions, but on a certain level, like if you graduate high school, it's relatable. If you graduate college, it's relatable. If you could pull yourself out of the projects of any city, it's relatable. And there's no wrong path. Like there's no like you can get off, tilted, but then you got to come back by like habits, come back by the lessons in the book are just, it relates to every single thing

that you would want to accomplish in life. And I'm not just saying that to pump the book, but it really is. Like, I'm only giving what other people are giving me, the feedback they're giving me, and it's cool to hear people just relate to the book. I love it because, you know, people know you from different things, right?

Some people know you as a player, some people know you as a coach, but with this book, it starts from where you came from, which is North Philly, right? And you talk about- Raymond Rosen Housing Projects. And you talk about, you know, you said, growing up in the projects was the best decision

your parents made. Explain that a little bit and how that formed to the woman that you are today. Just imagine the people that don't grow up in the projects. What you think happens in the projects. You think probably only one thing, crime, like bad things. And for me, it was the foundation of giving me the scars I needed, the chinks in the armor I needed to succeed. There was unity in the projects. There was discipline in the projects. There was manicure lawns. There was my block I grew up, never had trash in it.

It was captain in a way that would compete with any suburban lawn or neighborhood. So it was all those things that helped build you up. I'm unbothered and unafraid to tackle on the most challenging things in life because that's nothing compared to what I grew up with. That's nothing. Like, so I think it gave me the foundation I needed to just be able to coach every day,

like coach young people. Like generations are changing. Coaching talent and individuals and young people nowadays is very, very challenging. I love how you embrace your inner child. I love this picture on the back. What's a moment from your childhood that still shapes how you handle pressure today? You know, there's a story that I share in the book

about my father, who, I mean, I'm over 50 now, right? But when he, I don't know if I was 12, 14 maybe, I got invited to play on this team in this competition outside of Philly. Like it was a road trip and my father was like, no, you can't go. Like that hurt me. Like it really hurt me and I remembered it so vividly that for him to deny me that, because it was one of the first times, but I'm 13, 14 years old, whose parents gonna let them

somebody else take their child out of state. Like I wasn't thinking about that. I was solely thinking about basketball. But it was one of the experiences that drove me. Like I didn't like my father for that. Like I didn't like him for the parental decision that he made. But as I'm older now and reflecting on and writing a book

it is I need conflict. I know that about myself that I need conflict like everything can't be comfortable like if I have you know ten people supporting me you know here I need about ten to twelve people that's hating like I need it I mean it helps me. It drives me like It drives me. Like, it drives me. That's why you said, I don't have a critic yet. I'm waiting for a critic for the book right now. Right. My name is Joseph Rees. I am the creator and host of Hella Black, Hella Queer, Hella Christian, a fully black, fully queer, fully human, fully divine podcast that explores society, culture, and the intersections

of faith and identity. Listen to Hella Black, Hella Queer, Hella Christian to hear conversations about what it means to sound the way you look. I think what I've had to make peace with is that every iteration of my voice is given to me by God, and I love it. Books that validated our identity. The library now for me is a safe space as someone who is writing books that they're trying to take off of shelves.

And how we as black queer folks relate to our Christianity. Listen to Hella Black, Hella Queer, Hella Christian on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. So what happened at Chappaquiddick? Well, it really depends on who you talk to. There are many versions of what happened in 1969 when a young Ted Kennedy drove a car into a pond. And left a woman behind to drown.

There's a famous headline, I think, in the New York Daily News. It's Teddy escapes, blonde drowns. And in a strange way, right, that sort of tells you the story really became about Ted's political future, Ted's political hopes. Will Ted become president? Chappaquiddick is a story of a tragic death and how the Kennedy machine took control. And he's not the only Kennedy to survive a scandal. The Kennedys have lived through disgrace, affairs, violence,

you name it. So is there a curse? Every week we go behind the headlines and beyond the drama of America's royal family. Listen to United States of Kennedy on the iHeartRadio app, Apple podcast, or wherever you get your podcasts. Adventure should never come with a pause button.

Remember the movie pass era where you could watch all the movies you wanted for just nine dollars. It made zero sense and I could not stop thinking about it. I'm Bridget Todd, host of the tech podcast There Are No Girls on the Internet. On this new season, I'm talking to the innovators who are left out of the tech headlines like the visionary behind a movie pass, Black founder Stacey Spikes, there are no girls on the internet. On this new season, I'm talking to the innovators who are left out of the tech headlines. Like the visionary behind MoviePass, Black founder Stacey Spikes, who was pushed out of MoviePass,

the company that he founded. His story is wild and it's currently the subject of a juicy new HBO documentary. We dive into how culture connects us. When you go to France, or you go to England, or you go to Hong Kong, those kids are wearing Jordans, they're wearing Kobe's shirt, they're watching Black Panther. And the challenges of being a Black founder.

Close your eyes and tell me what a tech founder looks like. They're not going to describe someone who looks like me and they're not going to describe someone who looks like you. I created There Are No Girls on the Internet because the future belongs to all of us. So listen to There Are No Girls on the Internet on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Kelly Harnett spent over a decade in prison

for a murder she says she didn't commit. I'm 100% innocent. While behind bars, she learned the law from scratch. Because, oh God, H her and that jailhouse lawyer. And as she fought for herself, she also became a lifeline for the women locked up alongside her. You're supposed to have been faith in God, but I had nothing but faith in her.

So many of these women had lived the same stories. I said, were you a victim of domestic violence? And she was like, yeah. But maybe Kelly could change the ending. I said, how many people have gotten other incarcerated individuals out of here? I'm gonna be the first one to do that. This is the story of Kelly Harnett,

a woman who spent 12 years fighting not just for her own freedom, but her girlfriends too. I think I have a mission from God to save souls by getting people out of prison. The Girlfriends, Jailhouse Lawyer. Listen from July 14th on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. So it's that, it's the ability,

like, you know, we lost at UConn this year like you know the critics are saying I can't coach. I didn't understand that. That pissed me off so bad. That's what they say but I'm like okay well but again everything that I've needed in my life you know failure success happens to me is in the critics it's uncommon like but I know our loss this year will somehow help us. It will, I'm not just relying on it helping us, I'm gonna put action to it, so it means something.

I loved when you said that in a post-game conference, you was like, I hope that they're crying. I hope that my players are crying, I hope that it hurts, because that'll make them be better next year. Yeah, I mean, the most growth takes place when you're uncomfortable. The most. If you're comfortable all the time and I've said this as well like parents really don't want their kids to feel what they felt like pain and I'm like I want them to feel a little pain. I want them to hurt. I want them to be uncomfortable and I

love them enough to allow them to sit in that space because not for long but they need to fight their their way out of it because Nothing's gonna be given to I don't like that place. I don't like to feel that so I Fight like hell to try to not feel that by prepping by doing everything I need to do to not feel that it's almost like when you grow up in the projects and you grow up in poverty, you don't want that anymore. Like you don't want that. Once you've lived and you've, you know, earned a certain keep, you want to keep that because you want to change generations in your family and I hope I'm able to do that. We're still kicking it with Dawn Stanley, Charlamagne.

You seem like you've always been a natural born leader. Like throughout your whole life, even when you were the child, it made me wonder if coaching never entered your life, where do you think your leadership would have shown up instead? Oh man, that's a hard question. Like I'm competitive,

I probably would have been a losing gambler. You know what I mean? But trying like heck, like trying like heck. I don't know, I do, I love kids. So my work would have been with kids. And I'm glad that coaching found me. Like I'm glad somebody saw something in me that I didn't see in myself. I didn't see coaching.

I didn't want to coach at all. And I don't know why because I had great coaches. I had great people in my life that that challenged me that were good at it But when I when I had coaching friends, the only thing they talked about were their teams and basketball And I'm like, yeah, that's what I do every day. I do this every day. Why would I want to talk about it every day? Why would I want my life consumed with it? And here I am 25 years later Like loving it like it's I'm doing what I'm supposed to be doing and when you're able to live out your passion, it's the most beautiful, liberating

and incredible experience. I know my players really get something out of our relationship. They do. They build character. They navigate life. But for me is I'm overjoyed when they graduate I'm overjoyed on draft night I'm overjoyed when they're able to see their hard work produce what they want to like even if they don't make it to the league they're equipped with being successful with anything like seriously that does something to my heart when when young people were able to get what they're supposed to you know you talked about your players you got a lot of success stories from your time coaching at the University of South Carolina, but in the book you make it no secret that Asia Wilson

is your favorite. Well, I mean, here's why. And I've coached a lot of great players. Like Asia was the very first player that was the number one player in the country to decide she wanted to come play for us. And I know it was in her backyard. And we didn't look like a national championship team. Like we never won a national championship. We had never been to the Final Four. So for her to trust us with that part of her career meant that she believed in us.

She trusted us. She knew that we were going to get her to where she needed to go as far as still being the number one draft pick. Like four years later. Like when someone, and it wasn't just her, it was her entire family believed in it. And it took some at times them thinking, did we make the right decision? Because she started her first game, and then she was terrible, like scrub-like, right? Scrub-like is pretty far, that's far. So I was like, I gotta take you out of the starting lineup. But I didn't even tell her that.

I told her parents first, and her mom, Eva, was like, you sure? I'm like, you're gonna have to trust me on this one. Like, you're just gonna have to trust me. And she was like, you sure? I'm like, you're going to have to trust me on this one. Like you just going to have to trust me. And she was like, all right. But at the end of her freshman year, she was national rookie of the year. She was first team all SEC. She was rookie of the year in the SEC.

Like she got all the accolades coming off the bench. And when someone as a coach and leader and mentor, young people believe in you like they really do. When that's reciprocated, because I believed that, I knew that she was going to be the one that takes us to that next level. When you're able to have the same synergy, you know, Asia was hell to deal with. Right? Because she's young, like she went to private school for like 12 years.

All of her schooling was private school. So she needed to be roughened up a little bit to get her ready for what she faces. Like she faces the critics right now, but I know she can handle them because we took her through all of that. Like she's, she had dyslexia, right? Throughout her college career. And I'm like, okay, you're gonna read in front of the team. Every time we have a game, because we have a scripture reading and an inspirational reading before every pregame meal. And there's somebody that has to read it.

So I was like, you're gonna read that. It took her senior year. Couldn't do it the first, second, or third. Her senior year, she read out loud. And she had fun with it. She was like, y'all this is alone, y'all have to bear with me. Like it was that kind of liberation. So when she gave her entire self to me, the good, the bad, the ugly, entire, you know, that's why I just have a really strong like relationship with her. Like she could tell me anything. Like I'm non-judgmental. Like young people won't want to tell you everything strong relationship with her, she can tell me anything.

I'm non-judgmental, young people won't wanna tell you everything because they think you're gonna judge them. I don't judge, there's nothing that any one of my current, former, future players can tell me that's gonna rock me that I haven't seen. Everybody's been through, there's no new problems. It's the same old recycle problems. So just give it here so you're not dealing with it

longer than you need to. You know, it's interesting, right, because I was watching you, you did Good Morning America, the View Cove, all of that stuff like that. So you was working, but I still know you still the coach at the University of South Carolina. But I was like, oh, you know what?

She'll be fine, because she used to play ball and coach at the same time, which I found out about in the book. That was insane. Six years. That's crazy. Six years. I time, which I found out about in the book. That was insane. Six years. Six years. I mean, when I, when I got into coaching, I was like in my prime. So, you know, the, the, the AD at the time, he kept asking me like he was persistent, like I'm like, no, no, I'm not interested.

I'm, I'm playing in a WNBA. This is, and they just kept asking. And then, then I ended up having to go meet with him because the Final Four was in Philly, from Philly, he knew I was going to be there. So I went and sat down with him and he asked me two questions. He was like, can you lead? Did you do your research? And I was like, yeah, I basically was the captain on every team that I played on, right?

And then he was like, can you turn Temple Women's Basketball Program around? And I was like, oh, is that a challenge? Like, is that really a challenge? Because I'm drawing the challenges, and I never answered the question. I don't even think I answered the question. He was like, hey, can you just come down the hall and meet some people?

So I was like, okay, I'm here. He took me in this conference room, sat me at the head of the table, and there were like 10 to 12 people sitting around this table, and they're asking me questions like, where do you see yourself in five years? I'm like playing in the WNBA,

and they were like, do you ever see yourself coaching? And I'm like, no. Like, y'all, they were interviewing me. I was on a job interview, and I didn't know it, because all my job interviews were tryouts, like basketball, like physical tryouts Needless to say I took the job two weeks later They they just agreed to allow me to continue to play and coach

so I was I was in like basketball utopia because I I was coaching and I I'm actually still able to Express myself on the court because I wasn't ready to hang up my shoes. I was still very much a player. And I think that allowed me to play a little bit longer than I wanted to. And that allowed me to keep staying fresh with what was up with teaching young people. Because they were more enthralled with me playing

cause that's what they wanted. Like I was living their dream, right? Before their very eyes. And I think it just helped me be a better coach, be a more understanding coach because I was a player receiving information from a coach. And then I just helped the dynamics of what I was doing. We're still kicking in with Dawn Staley,

her new book, Uncommon Favor, is out right now. Basketball North Philly, my mother and the life lessons I learned from all three. Now I wanted to ask about your father, right? You mentioned your father earlier and you said your relationship wasn't that great. But you said it got better over the years. Do you understand some of the things that your father

was trying to implement in you as a young girl? Because they said that your father looked at women's basketball and felt there wasn't too many opportunities and didn't know if you could sustain at that time and do you wish that you kind of put yourself in his mentality back then as a child because even with the name of the book it says basketball north Philly my mother but not my father so explain that a little bit. Good catch.

You know I think even the one like family members that are that are But not my father. Good catch. No, no, I know. I know. I know. Good catch. You know, I think even the one family members that are closest to you, yes, I should have had a much more mature outlook on that relationship. Now that you can reflect on it now that you can see, because I held that. And if you can hear it, I still hold that instance.

But when you when you're coaching, right, you come into a situation where you hurt a player like you hurt that player. That was like probably 12 years ago. I hurt that player like it drives me to not hurt other players. And I wasn't mature enough or savvy enough to handle that at 12 or 13. So I do think it's, it's helped me be a better coach. It helps me be a better person to, to really like, again, I didn't talk about things. I held that for my father probably didn't probably doesn't he's he's been, he's

been dead and gone since 2001. Like I don't even think he really knew how much that hurt me. But also use that to navigate the nose. Like I handle nose a lot better because of that. I love the respect the power of habits chapter. And in that chapter you speak extremely highly of South Carolina's own Malaysia for a while. And you even refer to her as a younger, savvier version of you.

You say, and this is a quote, I heard from so many adults who gave their own parents hell only to see their teenagers return the favor. Now it's my turn in the barrel. So when I see you had, when I read that and I was like, and she had so much love for Malaysia, what was your initial reaction when she decided to enter the portal?

And was it surprising to you? Surprising? No. I think, you know, being in this space, you become to expect the unexpected, right? I still have much love for Malaysia, like much love. Like I want her happy. She and her mom came in, she said,

I think I'm going to get into the transfer portal. So I'm like, okay, well you think or you know? And she said, I know. And I said, well, I only want you happy. Like I really do only want our players happy, whether that's with us or somewhere else, just be happy. I told her, don't look back. I know it's probably gonna be hard to not look back,

to see you leaving your hometown and all that. I said, don't look back. Like you made this decision, just go forward with it. And don't look back. You're always gonna be a game cock. You're always gonna be welcomed here. I wish her the best. And when I say that, people probably think, oh,

but I do, like I really do. Like, cause I am, what's for us is for us. What's not is what's not. Let's keep moving. I don't stay in despair. I don't stay in those spaces for very long. I'm like, okay, we got to get recruiting. We got to get back into this portal to see who we can get to help us. I think she's going to have a promising career. I do think she's

a generational talent that will never leave. Like she does things on the basketball court that I've never seen a woman do. And woman do and she'll continue to do that and will continue to be happy for her except the one or two times that we have to play them. Like it's on. Like she's going to be super competitive against us. We're going to want to win and it's going to be a pride thing. That comes with just being a competitor and we got much love for her and her family.

Now this has nothing to do with the book, but I wanted to ask as we're talking about players. You know, WNBA has taken a huge jump in the last couple of years, and I love it. My daughters love it, my sons love it. What do you think what's going on in the WNBA with it? It seems like they're pitting, you know, Caitlin Clark against Angel Reese, right?

Kind of what they did in the NBA back in the day, but it was more teams, right? I guess not, maybe not teams. It was magic with birds this one was that one But this one it just seems like it seems very personable So what are your thoughts like even the other day with that foul and they called it a flagrant foul I don't necessarily agree. But what are your thoughts on it? Well, I think the officiating has a hard job That's one the decipher whether or not that's a flagrant one or not hard job And I do think they understand the dynamics of

Angel and Caitlin I do I think it's great for our game. Yeah, like it's a sport treat us like a sport Don't treat us anything other than being a sport. It happens in every sport soccer basketball football It happens in every sport. So let it be. I'm gonna take the lead of Angel and Kaitlyn. And that lead is, they said it was a foul. The officials got it right, we're moving on. That's what I'm gonna take their lead, okay? I think it pulls people in. I do think there are new fans

that haven't watched our game and they really don't know. So they're only singly focused on Kaitlyn. That one part, right. Right? So when you're that, and that's their idol, that's who attracts them. But I just hope that they'll open their eyes to the rest of the talent that is there.

Like the product is incredible, and it's in high demand. We played Caitlin in the national championship last year, right? 20 million, it topped off at whatever it topped off at, the most. I know they saw us, like I know they saw us. I know they saw us have an undefeated season. I know they saw Camila Cardozo.

I know they saw Ashlyn Watson. I know they saw Tessa Johnson have an incredible career or day. I know they saw Malaysia do some incredible things like... So open your eyes up to seeing outside of Kaitlyn. Well not even outside, included because she's a part of a part of it all. So you, I'm looking forward to the next time they play too, I'm gonna be glued in, just like everybody else, yes! I wanna go back to that chapter, respect the power of habits, right?

When you talk about Malaysia, it is with such reverence, how do you balance disappointment as a coach with support for somebody like her who just wanted to make a decision for herself? If a young person is gonna speak on what they deem is good for them, that's half the battle. Like half the battle is to be able to speak up. You know how hard it was for her to do that?

Like really hard, really hard. So I understand that dynamics of her decision making. And then it's like, okay, well, what do you do with it? Like if she was my player and there was a chance for her to want to come back, or if she decided that this is that that's not what she wanted to do, I was going to talk to her about why? Why did it? Why did it come to that?

What makes you think this isn't a place for whatever she said? We will go from there. I thought Malaysia, Malaysia was getting better. Like I really I saw a whole lot of growth on and off the court to where LSU was going to get the best of her now. We went through the hard part of just kind of smoothing some rough edges and getting her to create good habits. I do think habits are the thing that allows you to elevate.

Right? I do think habits are the thing that allows you to elevate. I do. So I think what we've given her and what she's given us will allow her to have much better days, much more consistent days than she had with us at her next stop. Well, thank you, Don. New book, Uncommon Favor, Basketball North Philly,

My Mother and the Life Lessons I Learned from All Three is available everywhere you buy books now. Go get it. You are guaranteed to learn something. That's right. You are an icon living Don. We appreciate your presence on this earth. We thank God for you. Thank you. And listen, I want everybody to remember that today Don Staley will be at the Barnes & Noble Fifth Avenue in New York City. If you're in New York City, you can go see Don Staley at Barnes and Noble, 1pm today, 555 5th Avenue in New York. Go get a copy of Uncommon Favor signed. Don, thank you again.

Thank you. Absolutely. Thank you. Appreciate y'all. Shawn Staley, it's the Breakfast Club. Good morning. Morning everybody. It's DJ NV Jess Hilarious, Charlamagne the Guy.

We are the Breakfast Club. It's time for a positive note. What we got? The positive note is simply this nothing that's for you will require you to act out a character to get it. Always remember that absolutely nothing. Have a great day. BREAKFAST CLUB BITCHES! You want to finish or y'all done? Show me how good it can get today God and show the rest of the world what we already know.

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