The Brilliant Idiots - "I’m a Lil T Pot, D!ck and Mouf

Episode Date: February 20, 2020

This week Charlamange and Andrew discuss Lizzo, All-Star Game, Deep Buckets, Black History month being too short, Bloomberg running for president, and more!!! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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To the guy who said, I'll marinate the chicken, then forgot. Hi, you're a Safeway PA announcer here. We've got pre-marinated meat. So all that's left is pretending you made it yourself. Today's show is sponsored by McCari. Okay, McCari. You got stuff lying around. You just don't use.

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There are never any awkward meetups. You can find Macari on the app stores on Macari.com. That's Macari, M-E-R-C-A-R-I. Let's start the show. It's so stupid it. It's positively boom. Yep, Shal-Maine-D-Ga. Andrew Schultz.

We are the brilliant idiots, and do you have church announcements, Andrew? I do have church announcements. Okay. The announcements are a very important part of what we do in church. This weekend, thank you so much, Taylor. I love your hair. Happy Black History Month. You know what I mean?

I wish you happy Black History Month yet. I love your hair. Hold your door, Taylor. Why is it open? Yeah, so special Black History Month shows this weekend in Pittsburgh. What? I can't have special Black History Month shows? Charlemagne, can I have Black History Month shows?

I booked them prior, but I'm just saying. Are they in Black Comedy Clubs? Say what? Where they at? Pittsburgh? is that black? Whiz Caliph is from there? Yeah, you got black,

a lot of black people in Pittsburgh. Pittsburgh, Miami. Yeah, it's black and yellow. It's very diverse. Black and yellow. Dude. What? Don't look at me like that.

Taylor? Holy shit. Black and yellow. Pittsburgh, where at? Pittsburgh Improv. Then we got Miami. I think these are sold out. I'll be honestly.

I'm not exactly. There might be a few takes left for Pittsburgh. And then go to the Andrew Shultz.com. We just added a bunch of shows. Tucson. Milwaukee, Atlantic City, writing PA, a bunch more continue to be added. Go there, the Andrew Shores.com.

Those are my church announcements. Today, today will be Thursday. I'm in Farmington, Michigan at this beautiful mental health gymnasium called Inception. Okay. I'm doing a field trip. I'm taking 10 people to experience Inception.

Inception is a place that I went last year, did the float therapy, did the brain. training, did the Magnusphere. Like, I've never experienced stillness like I did when I was at Inception. You know, I've tried meditation and all of that shit like that. But that flow therapy and that brain training is just something different. So I'm taking 10 people with me today. And I'm taking them to Inception in Farmington, Michigan.

So I'll be out there for a few hours. Oh, man, float therapy is amazing. Your guy talked about it all the time. Rogan. Float therapy is basically just a big tank. The flow tank. Yeah, the float tank. It's the big flow tank.

Yeah, I did that a few times. I did float, I talked about it on the road and when we went. I must have been peeing. Yeah, shit, no, you was this. But now, float therapy is dope. Float therapy is like, you know, you lay in the water, and at first you're going to feel jumpy because you're like, oh, shit. You know, but it's salt water.

So once you just relax. And no, you can float. It's just incredible. Because you won't float regardless because it's salt water. Right. But once you relax yourself and you just got to let yourself go and let the water carry you, You know, I promise you, man, when that light finally came on after an hour, I was kind of scared because I was like, where the fuck did I go?

Really? Yeah, man. Now, did you get anxious? Like, were you in your thoughts in an anxious way? In the beginning. And then once I just relaxed, I don't even know if you called that sleep. I don't know what it was. I just know when the light came on, it was immediate like, oh shit.

And it really feels like you just took your body, dumped yourself upside down. Somebody opened up your head. And whatever was in there just all fucking came. Are you going to put one in the basement? You got a nice little basement. Why not put one down there? I don't know. Maybe in the new crib.

Joe got some. A new crib. Moving up again? Oh, yeah, definitely. Okay. Okay. It's a contract here, baby. Okay.

Okay. Really? Where? Where? Which Jewish neighborhood are you gentrifying that? I'm definitely not telling nobody where I live. Listen, I'm the king and not telling you. telling nobody where I live. I'm definitely not telling

somebody. Nah, especially after hearing what happened to pop smoke this morning, because that's, once again, a great fear. Yeah, what happened? Rest and peace. I don't know. We'll get to that once we get to that segment. Oh, that's right. We're organized. We're doing segments now. Once again, you want to get a new house? Do segments, all right?

I'm down for the segments, Doc. I'm down for it, dude. So that was church announcements. All jokes aside, you know, the podcast is moving on up this year. A lot of things. Things are happening. I don't want to say things are happening fast because they're not happening fast. There's no need for things that happen fast because nobody over here is hurting for any money.

No, we're good. You know, when you're doing fine, you don't have to make rash decisions. Listen, brash decisions or rash decisions, either one, you don't got to make them. I don't even know what that means. Oh, the word is brash. It's brash. Do you know what I'm saying? I was talking about I meant raft decisions, the kind that make you itch.

You know what I'm saying? Because you're just so, you're feeding. You just like, oh. I need it. I need it. I need it. I need it. I got to have it.

Yeah. I got to have it. You know what I mean? Things ain't working right right now. I don't know what my next check coming from. And then I don't have those problems. That's a rash decision. You are right.

Yes. You're right. You are 100% right. So. But we don't have either of those. No. We don't. Right.

So life is good. Life is good. Thank you God. New house is on the way. Thank you, man. You know, man. Taylor got new hair. Hey, man.

Hey. You know what I'm saying? And it don't look struggling either. Those are nice braids. No, those sheds are nice. They just took a few hours. Which? Let me tell you about those braids before we get into one of our first segments.

Is that a new segment? Taylor's hair? You know what? Can we have a new Taylor's hair segment? The segment is called positively brilliant, right? Ah. So at first we're going to highlight some things that we think are positively brilliant. Then we're going to do another segment called What a fucking idiot.

So it's all one segment. So we highlight two things, right? I love this. Taylor's brilliant. I'm going to tell you why. Valentine's Day. I'm killing all of them. I'm kidding.

Day before Valentine's Day. I'm killing her. I'm killing Michaela. I'm like, oh, y'all are single. I'm killing Sim. Y'all don't got your nails done. Y'all don't got your heads there. That's how I know y'all don't got nobody.

Because if you did, y'all would be getting ready because Friday's a big day. Friday in Valentine's, you're going into the weekend. It was a whole Valentine's weekend, right? It was a perfect setup. None of them said nothing. McKale was about to cry. Sim, like, I don't give a fuck. I don't got nobody.

I don't care about Valentine's. Valentine's is overrated. Taylor don't say nothing. And I'll tell her was like, hmm, hmm, hmm. Taylor came in the next day, fresh poetic justice bridge. Taylor already knew she had her hair appointment schedule for the 13th, and she was going to be sitting between some woman's legs for four or five hours. And she got her shit done right.

Wow. Came in on Valentine's Day like, ha, me and Bay got a vacation schedule this weekend. You guys went on vacation? No. It could have been, though. Why? Um, you knew why. Yeah, why could have been a vacation?

Because that dick was out of this world. I mean, but anyway, no, we just got a hotel in the city. But we're going to go on vacation. We're going to do the version of the- Boom. The reason I say she's brilliant, though, is because... You heard of she got a hostel in the city? That's dope.

No, he's not. She's from Philly, though. He got a home family. He got a home family. If you got a hotel in the city you live, you've got a family, you're cheating on. No, he just got a trash-out apartment that they always fucking. So he had to do something. No, good point.

Hey, good point. Sherlock Charlo over here. They're fucking in that apartment. The hotel had a nice jacuzzi and everything. Exactly. Did you sold over that jacuzzi? Ew, yo, other people got to go in that jacuzzi. Don't be fucking in all those jacuzis, man.

And Valentine's, this is a holiday weekend. You want to change the scenery. I get it. You know, go get a hotel in the city for the weekend. But I say Taylor's brilliant for that because she could have easily be like, I'm getting my head done the day. She was like, nope. I'm a show and proved by actions indeed, not words and lip service.

Because you know if she had told me she was getting her head done today, I'd have said to her, you had that shit planned anyway. No, I would have said, you just did that because I teased you. Because there was somebody that we were teasing one time. There was somebody we was teasing one time. And all of a sudden, they came in with some goddamn brains. But I'm going to keep that to myself, all right? But Paige?

Was it Paige? It definitely wasn't page. Who was it? No. I'll tell you later. Do you have anybody you want to salute for positive liberalian? Nah! I got one more.

All right. This is what I actually wanted to salute. I was underprepared, man. Fuck. I'm sorry. I wanted to salute CNN for hiring Andrew Yang to be a political commentator. He'll have to talk about this coronavirus, though, for real. Listen.

No, no, no, no. We don't need to have a whole conversation about this. I'm sure he got thoughts on it. I'm sure you got thoughts on it. I just think it makes all the sense in the world because Andrew has a huge social media following. Yang gang is very active during every debate. They used to make Andrew Trent the debates he made And people like his POV on things

You see him on talk shows like Bill Maher. He's really good. I think it's a great decision also because he's pretty bipartisan. Pretty bipartisan. And that's a rare thing for CNN to do. Futuristic thinker. Very futuristic thinker. Got a lot of cool perspective.

Yo, agreed. Great idea. Yes. Great hire. Brilliant for CNN to sign him. Brilliant of him to sign. Tell me about that. So you stay relevant.

You stay in the... I never heard of Andrew Yang before this. Yeah. So it's like, yo, take that. stardom that you got from running for president. Now you're a CNN commentator. He got books and shit out. I'm sure his book sales are starting going through the roof.

And who knows where it could go from Andrew Yang from America? Andrew is the type person that needs money, bro. Let's be for real. Andrew being president would be cool for Andrew, but Andrew needs that bread. Why? Because he can invent shit, because he can create shit. Is that what he does?

I honestly don't know what he does. I know he's Asian. Does he? I don't know. That's a good question. I don't know if he does that. I sat down with Andrew a bunch of time. I mean, he has a bunch of ideas when it comes to...

Be honest, bro. Artificial intelligence. We don't know what he does. He might just own some laundromats. What? Nah, he's in Silicon Valley. I think he owns laundromats in Silicon Valley. He's a business man.

He has some shit digital. That shit might be the wave. Yo. All the people that's in Silicon Valley working. They might need to walk up in a digital laundromat and get their shit. You don't got time to watch your own shit. Come on, bro. Who knows?

I love it. I just think that was a genius move of CNN. that was positively brilliant. Man, I wish I had a good positive thing that I was... Oh, oh, here's my positively brilliant. The way that the NBA changed the All-Star game. Boom. I thought that was positively brilliant.

The fact that they turned the game in the fourth quarter into a pickup game. Yes. And when it's a pickup game, your competitive juices start flowing. Yeah. And the way there's this beautiful shot. LeBron James posted, a bunch of other people posted. But LeBron is at the top of the key, and Janus is defending him. And in the background, you see Cuevo.

Offset, 2, James. Offset, two chains, like, all these people, right? They're into it. They're like. Hyped! Got the phone out. Look it like. It looked like Ruckus Park.

It looked like some like pick up, like, you know, when you see a good and one game, everybody's like, oh, out of these seats. That's what it looked like. Yeah. That's actually a great comparison because I was thinking it's playoff basketball, but it's more dynamic than play with basketball, because playoff basketball, you're not standing up, you're not half on the court. So there's a casualness to it.

But I thought the way the NBA, and the way the NBA did, for any of you guys don't know, is essentially what they did is, once you get to the fourth quarter, the team that's in the lead has to score 24 points. And the team that's not the lead has to score whatever their difference between the team and the lead is

and 24. And they shut the clock off. And no clock, no time, nothing. They stole from ice cubes, the big three, by the way. Good. Yeah, they definitely took that from ice Q's the big three. Good, get that shit. But, like, it really created this great intensity

and, like, you saw the real alpha males coming out, Hardin passing a ball. Every chance he has. Hardin playing fucking defense. Yo, did you hear what Johnis said? Jonas is so European and Africa. You know how Europeans and Africans, like, they don't understand, like, how to, like, give you shit soft? Yeah.

They just go, hey, you are fat. You should lose weight. Yeah. You know, that's just, like, straight, direct. So they asked Janice, they were like, what was your team strategy in the fourth quarter? And they're like, basically, whoever was Hardin was guarding, we were going to target him. So we thought that was the easiest way to score. Huh?

He said, he was borderline autistic in the way that he said. If any of us said it, they'd be like, oh, they're just busting balls. He was 100% serious, look right at the corona. Yeah, he was the weakest defender, so we decided to target him. Well, Hardin is the weakest defender. But you don't say it in an all-star game, bro. It was not the playoffs. Oh, yeah.

I mean, he is the weakest defender. Yes, he is 100%. I mean, he wasn't totally wrong. No, he was right. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But you think that you kind of tease and everybody's joking around. Yeah, yeah. But I thought that was positively brilliant.

100%. I wonder when Hardin gets called a weak defender. Is that make him want to score 70 points just to show you his strip? You know what I'm saying? Yeah, I can't fucking defend, but watch this. Neither can you because I just scored seven. I'll get these buckets back. Listen, so we can transition right into a what-of-fucking idiot.

I didn't have this on my what-of-fucking idiot list, but it made me think about it. The judges of the slam dunk contest for NBA All-Star Weekend. A little hometown cooking? I'm going to tell you what the NBA has to stop doing. Stop letting non-dunkers judge the dunk contest. It should be historically great dunkers, the Dr. Jays, the Michael Jordans, the Dominique Wilkins,

Clyde Drexler, people who have Vince Carter. Spud Webb. Spud Webb. People who have actually one slam dunk contest and understand the degree

of difficulty of these dunks. Let them be the judges. I don't want to see no celebrities. I don't need no Chadwick Bowesman. I don't need no motherfucking common. God bless them to my guys, but I don't need them. I don't need no players like Dwayne Wade.

I need dunkers. I want dunkers to be the judges of the slam dunk contest. That's it in the story. It is idiotic to have anybody else out there judging slam dunk contests. Yeah, because we're not watching it for the judges. No!

Like, they think the judge bringing some kind of, like, celebrity to the matter. Like, nobody's going, I wonder what number Dwayne Wade's going to give. No. They don't understand a degree of difficulty. Yo, what the fuck does Eric Gordon have to do? Aaron, Aaron, Aaron. He jumped over somebody seven foot fucking five. I think that I don't trust those dunks. Why, because the guy bend his head a little bit?

And you can push off of him. So it's like when you're jumping over a fence. You can't jump over a fence, but if you put your hands on top of the fence. I don't know, bro. I think my leg will still get caught. You think? Yeah, man. I mean, because it's not like he's, like, when you run up on a fence.

You can't jump over him. But I'm saying, when you run up on a fence, you got to grab yourself. You can barely jump over a fire ice. I used to have a crazy article. Really? My vertical was like 67 inches. There's no way. I don't give a fuck what you say.

Now, is it one of those things like your dick in the summer, it's like 69 inches? And then in the winter, it's like a 62. I used to have a 67 inch vertical leap, bro. How many feet is 67 inches? There's no way. That's five feet seven inches, bro. I don't know what to tell you. I can jump over Spud Webb.

Which want me tell you? I clear mugsy bull. I used to could clear mugsy bones, bro. No, you used to could not. There's no way in hell you could have a 67. My cab muscles used to be so fucking safe. Low key. Can I be honest to you?

I don't think you can touch the ceiling. Right now. With Tim's on. Easily. Hold on. I'm trying. Not even trying. Not even trying.

We might have to take it outside. Hold on. I might need a higher seat. This ceiling is recessed. It's different. I didn't realize how. recessed the seal it was going to be. That was pretty easy for her to set the ceiling.

But that's no 67 inches, bro. That's not 67 inches. I might be exaggerating, 64. There's no way you even have 60. You're barely 67 inches. I don't know what to tell you. I was a freak of nature. I was serious.

I don't know what to tell. What I actually had for absolutely idiotic. Yeah. Robert Lee Noyes. He was arrested for charges. of harassment and false imprisonment after he kidnapped a white woman and forced her to watch roots

because he wanted to teach her about racism. Let me tell you something. I don't know how or what this white woman felt about black people before. But I know if I'd have a shadow of a doubt, she absolutely hates niggers now. Whoa. It's Black History Month.

We can't be dropping the R on that Black History Month. I'm just telling you. Like, come on. If you didn't have a feeling about Black people before, that might do it for you, right? Bro. Come on now. I think that you're going 100% I was right about these people.

It's like every time you see a pride parade, like, you know how like if you go to the gay parade, right? Obviously we want people to have parades. But like if anybody go into the gay parade, right? And before they went there, they were like, ah, gay people are flamboyant and extra and they want to party and dance. You're like, I'll stop stereotyping. And then you go to the parade, you're like, whoa. When you write, you write, baby. When you write, you write.

That's true, man. So, yeah, this is the wrong way. That being said, there is a way to get white women to come to your house to watch Roots or whatever movie you want. Okay, talk to me. It's called Tinder. Ew. Yeah. Alex has been very good at it.

So you swipe, what is it, right or left? Al, I don't know. I have a girlfriend, so I don't know about these things. I don't know. These dating apps work. You know what I'm saying? You do fucking off Tinder, Alex? Come on, Al.

Al, out here, white women's specialist. Really? This guy's a white women specialist. For Black History Month, what you're doing? He just said all women matter. I just said all women matter in the background. Jesus Christ. Okay.

Can I ask you a question? Talk to me. This is the idiotic thing. People getting upset that Black History Month is the shortest month. People still mad about that? It's actually long this year because it's Alephia. So it's an extra day. Now, is that something that upsets you?

No. I never even looked at it like that No All right It's up set you Taylor Why? Why are you upset Do you know

What? I'm just saying like Black history in America Has been fucking rough Do you want to spend Like a long month Talking about that Wouldn't you want to shrink that down

That's why this guy Robert is stupid too Because it's like Isn't that a good point Like hey it's really How much do we want to go over slavery Like Well no it's more than that though And that's the problem

What'd be to talk about fucking peanut butter? for the whole month. No, that's the problem with guys like Robert Lee Noyes. Like black people have, you know, been at the forefront of so many innovative things in this world and in this society.

Right. So for you to sit down a white woman and say, watch roots, because this is what racism is all about. Yeah. No, racism is a lot broader than even just slavery. Yeah.

You know what I'm saying? Racism is kind of like kidnapping someone because of the color of their skin. Yeah. He kind of defeated the person. Also, his name is Robert Lee? Holy. shit.

This is a plant. This is a plant. It can't be in real. Robert E. Lee, the commander of the Confederate Army and the Civil War. There's no way. They got pictures of him, though. He looks black?

Does he look black? Jesus Christ. Remember I talking about this? Oh, remember I talking about stereotypes of the gay property? Whatever stereotypes you got of a black man, Robert fits them all. Bro, I want to talk about, I want to talk about this. Black history.

Oh, okay. He got that, bro. Used to play football. high school. So we're moving on. We're moving on from our segment positively brilliant. What a fucking idiot.

And we're going into shit you won't care about next week. It's a hot topic segment. Black history, let's talk about this. It probably over next week. It is over next week.

And we're being honest. It's not. It's not. This is another thing that we need to understand. Why are you getting so upset about this? Because black people just been like historically disenfranchised

and everybody goes. goes, oh, it's a shorter month. It's not shorter. It's faster for the fastest people. They gave you the fastest month. That doesn't make sense? Stop. The fastest month is February. Also, it's the month that's spelled the weirdest. You guys spelled your name's the weirdest. You know what I mean? I don't think I don't think anybody even put that much thought. This is not, I'm thinking it makes perfect sense. I don't think nobody put that much thought into it. What do you mean? I actually think the problem I have with Black History Month is that it's so much other shit in it that the

scratch you from Black History Month. Oh. Every year. It's the Super Bowl. It's the Grammys. It's Valentine's Day. I remember one year, Black Panther came out,

which made a lot of sense, by the way. Black Panther came out. The Oscars comes out. Like, it's so much stuff that happens all throughout the month of February that you're like, eh. That's a good point. You think it should be a month and a half?

You think it should be a month and a half? Wow, man. All 12 months. Black history can be as long as you want it to be. But we don't get noticed by that. Who? Who you need to be? to acknowledge you.

Who? That's like I'm saying. Who do you need to acknowledge you? I wanted to be a month where nothing happens to black people. Like we get like, because even in that fashion designer that they tried to imitate like the monkeys, whatever like that. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.

Who did that? I don't know. What's that? No, Montclair. H&M. That sounds like two years ago. Was that not Claire? No, no, no, no.

It just recently happened. They're running their bat. Yo, yo. Yo, yo, yo, son. Yo, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Say what Paige just said, yo. This shit fucking killed me, son. Yo, you know, son.

She said, Paige. She goes, babe, bathing ape. But low-key, babe's been getting off light. Why? They've been having them, the gorilla as the logo. But it's not a human. What? It's not a human.

Yeah, I know. It's a gorilla. What's wrong with it? Well, what was wrong when the other ones did it? because it said, no, it was because H&M did coolest kid in the jungle, and they had the black kid wearing the shirt. Oh. Yeah, in the ad.

I mean, that's insane. Let me see. What is it? I don't know what fashion thing this is. That's a little bit crazy. It's just extra. On February. Why?

This is why I hate New York Fashion Week in, bro. New York Fashion Week is trash. Let me see it. Fuck, bro. Like, Because they make you walk the runway in things that you would not wear out in public. What is fashionable about that? I don't know, but it looks like me a little.

Who the money? I'm just saying, what is fashionable about that? A little bit. It resembles me. I'm not going to law. People go to school to learn that kind of shit? Yeah. I don't get it.

I don't get it. I don't get it. You know what I mean? Some of us are naturally gifted with this fashion shit. You know what I mean? You know what I mean? I'm out of here. Bro, look at that. Army fatigues.

You know what I'm saying? Bring it. You got a little A on your shit with a heart. I got the A with the heart of Valentine's Day. What kind of kicks of those? Say what? Kind of kicks of those. These are the World War I-Won-1s.

Ooh. The World War I. WW1, baby. He out here. Let me tell you something. I want to hear your opinion. Do you have the Wendy Williams' joke? I want you to see the visual.

Oh, wait, what happened? Listen, listen, we're. doing the segment is things shit you won't care about next week. Hot topic segment. We're just going to run through a bunch of frivolous news. I love it. This is great. I love this.

I love this. If they produce it right, it'll be great. That's true. You need to drop. What was you just doing? Drew Carrey's ex-fiancee was tragically murdered over the weekend. Let me set it up. Okay.

Wendy, right? Yeah. Was mocking the death of Drew Carrey's ex-fiancee. Drew Carrey, Price is right, host. Yeah. His ex-fiancee got pushed off about. I think it was by another ex-boyfriend in Hollywood Hills. Oh, that guy was on Kill Tony.

I don't know what the fuck you're talking about. He was an aspiring comic, and he did the Kill Tony show. Tony Hinscliffe and Brian Redmond did his great show in L.A. at the Comedy Store. And he was one of the comics that had been on it in the past. The guy that... Yeah, dude. Drew Carrey's ex-fiancee. Keep going. Keep going.

Shouts to Kill Tony, though. Wow. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Play it. This is Wendy Williams talking about it. Drew Carey's ex-fiance was tragically murdered over the weekend. She lived with a roommate, a girl roommate, and the roommate heard the screaming.

The neighbors all around the neighborhood heard the screaming, and they called 911. Once the cops got there, she was down there dead on the ground. Was pushed off of a third floor balcony. I'll give you a little backstory. She was killed, not by Drew, but by the ex-vee. Come on down! Then she did her head like this.

And so yesterday, all day on Twitter, it was hashtag cancel, cancel Wendy. Wow. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Now you're a comic. Yeah. We've talked about, you know, being able to make jokes out of anything. Yeah. What do you think?

I think if Drew killed her, then it would have been a really good joke. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. But Drew didn't kill her. Yeah. But if Drew threw his girl off the balcony. Yeah. And then was like, come on down. Yeah.

Yeah. I could see why you would make the joke. I don't know if it would be a good joke, though. I mean, I don't know. I just think it's weird that a woman, Wendy Williams, would make a light of what essentially is domestic violence. Because she's been at the hand of it. Well, just the fact that a woman got killed by another man in that way.

Yeah. Like, what was the point? Look, I defend jokes, man. Even when they don't come from comedians? Yeah. Because at the end of the day, like, we just got to defend humor. I think that she's trying to do it. Now, this is one second where I say, like, I kind of get it because she's making a joke about a hypothetical that didn't happen.

She's like, Drew didn't do it. Yeah. Imagine Drew did it. Come on down. And then boom. Yeah, yeah. But Drew didn't do it. So she's making a joke about something that did not happen.

She's actually not making a joke about the dead because the dead didn't get dead like that. By the way, her audience? Yeah. Crickets. Yeah. I mean, nobody snickered. nobody giggled. Nobody was like,

it was just like, the fuck is wrong with you? Yeah. You know what I mean? I mean, it wasn't funny enough. I'm trying to think we could think funny ways. I don't think it was funny. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Not in that. I just think certain things you have to leave alone. If it's funny enough, it's funny enough. We learn with the Kobe thing. Tony had that great joke about Kobe. But it wasn't about Kobe. Say what?

It was about the fact that he died. It was just a really funny, spin on it. So sometimes there's funny around something. Yeah, and we know what's so good about that joke as well is when he said the joke, that is the reaction people had, right? People were like, damn, Kobe died? Nah, bro. Yeah, you're upset. Yeah, you're upset. Yeah. So when you come with the

Kobe passing, never. Like, I guess what I'm saying is you can make a joke about something. You just got to find the right angle to do the joke. So that one was just... Yeah, the murder ain't it though. I mean, dude, you know how many OJ jokes? Not about the car. Oh, though.

Yeah. Really? Dude. No, I know OJ caught a lot of jokes, but I don't remember too many jokes about Nicole. It was OJ that used to catch the jokes. Yeah, but. And they would make jokes about like, you know, OJ cutting the cheese or something, you know what I mean? Stupid shit like that.

I don't know. I was a statement. Matter of fact, let me Google. Hold on. Let me Google. You have tons of OJ jokes, bro. Hold on, hold on. Let me Google.

100%. It gets tricky. Google. But I always tend to defend jokes. Because people are going to be offended by something. Even by non-comedians? Yeah. Really?

Yeah. Yeah. I mean, yeah, I do it, man. Because I think the joke is worth defending. The idea that you should be able to make a joke is worth defending. It's not like comedians sign up for the Army or something like that. And, like, we're here to protect the country. Like, at the end of the day, we're just like anybody else making jokes.

This is a good O.J. Simpson joke, but it's not about the murder. Okay, go. What is it? Do you know what the L.A. Rams and the Los Angeles Police Department have in common? What's that? Neither are very effective against the run. That's cool. That's cool. It's around it. Right.

You know what I mean? Right, right, right. Let me sit down in. I mean, these are like street jokes we're talking about. I'm sure. Oh, this is actually a good article that came out back in 94 about comedians making O.J. Simpson jokes and about the dark humor surrounding them. And as comedians defending why they decided to make O.J. Simpson jokes. As one dude says, I don't feel bad. Simpson's a millionaire.

Anyone in the spotlight is fair game. Right. think he's saying we're making jokes about OJ. But people made jokes about the fucking... I'm glad comedy has evolved. You heard about O.J. Simpson's alibi? The night of the murders, he was waiting to be served at Denny's? I don't get it.

I don't get it. I don't get it. Another comedian said we joke about Simpson because we don't want it to be true. Yeah, I think there's something about that, you know? I mean, you know me. I defend the joke or the right to make the joke. Because in order for a joke, to like get funny,

it has to start often at an unfunny place. I heard that hurts just renewed OJ's contract. Only now he's making license plates for him. Hey. Man, I don't know, man.

It's like one-liners, man. I'm glad comedy is the football. I'm trying to think if I had a good OJ bit back in the day. What I have? Something. Nah, I don't know. I don't think so.

You didn't have anything back in the day when it came out? I mean, you were doing radio. You must have, like, I don't know. I wasn't doing no fucking radio in 94, Andrew? How old do you think I am?

63 or something? I don't know how old are you, bro. I didn't start doing radio until 99. Really? Yeah. I started off as an intern in 98, and I got on the air in 99. Yo, I'm tripping, bro. I didn't realize how long ago OJ was, man.

I remember the decision. Do you remember the decision? LeBron? Nah. What? The court decision. What? You can't fucking tell me that when you think the decision,

and you don't think LeBron James going to Miami, bro. You're right. You're right. I'm never thought about O.J. Simpson in the decision. Now, you're right. But I'm talking about the court. The acquittal. The acquittal. If the gloves don't fit, you must acquit. Bro, I remember they brought us in elementary school to the auditorium, the entire school. And they told us the decision. I remember I was in...

Really? I was, I don't know, between kindergarten and sixth grade, right? Was that during Black History Month? Probably. It was probably during Black History Month. and they put all the black kids outside. I remember that. And they did not do that.

Just joking. They brought us into the auditorium, and they said, we just want to let you know that OJ has been acquitted. He is not guilty. It was in October. And for all kids,

we have no clue what the fuck is really going on. The entire auditorium erupts with applause. Why? I do not. I don't remember any of that. Like when I watched the OJ 30 for 30, I don't remember that around.

Can I tell you how big this was for anybody listening right now? You know who I was for Halloween one year? OJ Simpson. Judge Ito. Who the fucking is Judge Eto? That was the fucking Asian judge who presided on the case. You've been offensive, bro. You've been fucking problematic, bro.

You've been culturally appropriating this shit, bro. You should be ashamed of yourself. Why? What did the costume look like, Andrew? Y'all really want to know. Are there any pictures of this anywhere? Honestly, I just put on my Taekwondo outfit. I did.

They're like, who are you? I was like, I was Judge Edo. Off-duty Judge Edo. No, I bought a mask. I bought an Edo mask. He had to have masks? Yeah. He was that big?

Son, I don't remember Judge Eto. Massive, bro. I remember Johnny Cochran. I remember Robert Kardashian. I remember the fucking. I never remember Kardashian. The guy who wanted to bury O.J. What was his name?

He was a cop. Oh, yeah, the racist cop. I can't remember his name right now. They had the racist cop. And then I remember his boy, Cato, something Cato. Remember OJ's boy? He was living in his boathouse or some shit. When they said it was driving?

Nah, white guy. Mark Furman, yeah, Mark Furman, Mark Furman, Mark Furman. But Calvin Cato or something like that. I don't know. Tell us what the costume was, Andrew. I had a judge robe. And then I had a Asian guy's head mask. It was a Judge Edo mask.

I bought it at the store. Judge Edo. That's not it, but something essentially like that. Oh, he really did that mask. Yeah, it was called your abrogation. That's not called your appropriation. If they're selling the mask of a person and you wear their mask, that's fair thing.

They were selling a mask. They were selling a mask. I didn't just buy an ancient person's head. Why would they sell Judge Edo for Halloween? OJ is the scary one. That's who the fuck you dress up as if you want to fucking scare some people. Yeah, you're right. What the fuck?

You're right. Why would you dress up as Judge Eto? It was a different. time, man. Back then you could do this shit. My parents bought it for me. They never thought anything about it. So you thought Judge I was a hero? I didn't know what I thought. I just thought he was part of the case and I was like, I'd be funny. He's the guy that essentially let OJ off.

Son. Yo, why Judge I don't get more smoke? Why should he? I'm just saying it. The jury let him off. I know. But yeah, yeah, yeah, you're right. Right? He's just there to preside over the case.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I wonder how those jurors feel. Has anybody ever talked to any of the jurors from the OJ Simpson trial? OJ hasn't killed since. Which is good. You know, like if you're like a serial killer, like you needed to do it. That's a good O.J. Simpson joke. You heard O.J. is doing stand-up now, right? He's killing.

He's killed. Yo, I hate Charlottin's stand-up voice. Anytime you go to a bit, you use this stand-up voice. So, you know, now. You like, turn this to Rodney Dangerville. Hey, my favorite comedians are the ones that talk like that because they bomb every time. Because people can just hear the setup coming. You know what I'm saying?

You just hear the setup coming. It's like, I don't know what you're about to say, but I promise you that's not going to deliver. I didn't know you did stand up. Yo, son. We need to go back to the what a fucking idiot's like? Did we need to go right? Jesus Christ. Son, Angela got a video on YouTube right now.

That shit is horrible. That shit killed me, bro. I said, yeah, stop, man. That shit killed me because the confidence was like too much. Too much. It was too much. He walked on stage, started talking to girls. Yeah, you like dick or something like that just right into it.

It was wild, bro. His first year... How did I do stand-up? His first year was, I'm by. Racial? No, you did it. Get the fuck out of here. Boo!

Get him to fuck off the stage! I'm already fucking offended. I'm gonna hit his stupid shit. That was his first joke out the gate. You didn't watch it? I told you was making me uncomfortable. I was just, I scrubbed through a little bit of it. Because he has like a big old intro.

Bro, he twirks at the end. No. Bro. Bro. Bro. He got so desperate. He got so desperate that he realized it was time to fuck some stools, but he didn't have a stool.

So he just started popping that ass, bro. Oh, my God. Angelo. Have you quit? I don't do it all right. Why? Oh, man. You got to get back out there.

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Remember, that's F-O-R-H-H-E. i.m.com slash b i and you get your first month free let's get back to the show all right shit you won't care about next week uh lizzo calls out men who judge women's bodies this thing is so weird with lizzo bro because she got to know she's unhealthy is there audio i don't think i'm any different than any of the other great women who've come before me that had to literally you know be politicized just to be sexual or sexualized or to you know what i mean exist um and things on them that are beautiful or called flaws. And they persisted against that and fought against that.

And now, you know, I'm able to do what I do because of those great women. And they all look completely different. They don't all look the same. And they all had to do with the same type of marginalization and misogyny. So what does that tell you about the oppressor? What does I tell you about men? Get it together. We don't talk about your dick sizes, do we?

And say, that's not a conventional dick size. It's too small. We still let your asses run all over the goddamn place. You don't talk about our dick sizes? You don't talk about our dick sizes? We don't talk about your pussy sizes. That's the reality. We never talk about how much volume you got in your pussy.

Right? You talk about how many inches our dicks are, how fat, girth, all that kind of stuff. None of us talk about the space that you got in your pussies. That is true. Right? People don't get complimented for having shallow vaginas. And they should. And they should.

or tight vagina's whatever it is and you girls got no clue how much room you got in there I'll tell you to me and if it doesn't get filled it's our fault well maybe you got a bucket I'll tell you

I'll tell you the problem with Lizzo's comments and this is why you know there's a lot of bucket-ass women out here that are talking shit about little dicks you know why we don't talk

about the buckets though why because we feel inferior I fucked the bucket once that's what I'm saying bro I fuck the bucket we don't know if it's us bro is this a buck

Is this bucket too big or is my goddamn handle too little? Bro, you know what I'm saying? I fucked a bucket one time. I fucked the bucket, bro. Wait, no, you about to tell a joke. I just, fuck the bucket one time. I'm not. I fuck a bucket one time.

What's the deal with fucking buckets? You put your dick in and it's like, what's all this room going on in here? I fucked a bucket one time. And guess what? I realized I wasn't alone in here. Hit that twerk! Hit that twerk! Save that joke!

Save that joke! Son, I fucked a bucket one time, bro. I was a young man. I was in Austin, Texas, a young man. What happened? I put my dick in, and the bucket was weird. It wasn't a bucket. It was kind of like a vase.

Really? Like a vase for flowers. because the entrance was tight and then when you went in it footballed. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And it was like an air pocket or something was in there. And I remember I put my dick in and then I remember I was just kind of windshield wiper in it

on the inside. Yeah, it's like a room in Willie Wonka's house. Huh? The door looks super small. But if you go in. When you get in? Look at this big old world. Seriously.

Yeah. I thought that she must have had like a recent abortion or something. I just thought there was room in there that she just was made because it was distinctly big. Yeah. It was distinctly big. Like something four pounds,

three ounces was in there before you got there. At least. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. You know, so I had that bucket experience. Wow. And I just had to just focus on the rim because that was the tightest part.

Wait. I just kind of like, poop, poop, poop, poop, poop. You got to give her a compliment then. What? You got to say, yo, the same way a girl compliment a guy. Like, yo, you got a big old pussy.

You know what I'm saying? I'm serious. Because if a girl was fucking you, a girl would be like, yeah, you got a big old dick. Yeah. So when you're getting them bucket vaginas, get with that compliment. Yeah. Let's see if she takes it as a compliment. Yeah.

If somebody told you you had a big old vagina. Wouldn't you like that? Hell no. Well. You wouldn't like it if I was like, I'm not going to give you back shots. I'm going to give you buck shots. So listen, if a guy compliments you and tells you Taylor, look, you got a big old vagina. You immediately regret.

and state property run a train. You not stop saying that rumor. Big vagina is an insult. Do y'all know what big sticks are, though? What? What? Don't insult me. Wait, wait, what you just ask?

Do we know what big dicks are? I know what big dicks are. We've seen porn. We got porn hubby like everybody else. But I'm saying, like, do y'all know what a good size dick is? Yes, we do. Mine. A little bit smaller than mine.

7 inches, 3, 4th, 8 when it's warm out, 2 and a half, But like, like, big this and everything too, curve, like all that size. See how much you. See how they objectify us, y'all? See how they treat us like we're just a piece of meat in our bodies? Yes, it's a lie that women don't talk about dick sizes. That's number one that was wrong. Open up one of your fucking magazines.

It's just all dicks. That's all you're worried about is dick size. We're just telling Lizzo you're going to lose a toe. That's all we're trying to tell her. You're going to lose a foot if you keep eating that way. This is not something to be proud of. It's unhealthy. That's different than shaming a woman for her body.

We're shaming you into hell. Now, I will tell you where Lizzo's comments were a bit misguided. Okay. Right? She said we don't talk about your dick sizes, which isn't true. Women do talk about men's dick sizes. But the difference between a man's dick size and somebody's body weight, we see it all the time. We see somebody's body's weight is visible to the naked eye.

Yes. Unless you got x-ray vision, you're not walking around looking at men's dicks all day. So that's why people are so quick to comment on other people's body weight because we see it. It's visible. If we were walking around with our dicks out, trust me, we would get dick shamed all the time. You know what I mean?

That's probably why we invented pants. Think about all those fucking... Because y'all were dick shaminging us. Those little pygmies you see on National Geographic and shit. Yeah. And they'd be walking around in their tribe and they'd be having no pants on,

they'd be having them little dicks. Little dicks. You shamed the fuck out of them. They are. They are doing that. Come on. And they don't say nothing about the saggy-ass tits that the pygmy women got.

Flat-ass tits. That shit don't matter in their culture. Don't matter in their culture. Yeah. Tits hanging all down. Right. Look at me. I mean like, I will say, though, what?

You got to stop being so hard on Lizzo. Yes. And the reason you got to stop being so hard on Lizzo is because Lizzo will learn in time, what everybody else learns in time. Eventually, you got to get down with us. You got to get it right. It happens to everybody. Is it fair to say that we're not being hard on Lizzo because she's fat? We're being hard on Lizzo because she's misleading a generation of people who will think it's okay to be.

It's not Lizzo. It's society. Society is doing that. And she is a focal point. For whatever reason, she's the poster girl for all things fat, which I don't think is fair either. Uh-huh. But she's the poster girl for all things fat. So people always come at her as if she's out there pushing this narrative. But she's walking around her fucking thong out and the Lakers can't.

Like, she's leaning into this. She's embracing herself. She's embracing what she is. Yeah, but like, what if somebody was like, I'm embracing my cancer. I mean, she could do that. You kind of got to, though, right? No, people fight, fight that shit. You're right, you're right, but it is people.

Yeah, damn. Because her obesity is going to kill her at a much younger age, right? Her obese. And then also all the other people who are like, I got to embrace my body too. Now all them are going to die as well. So if you just, and if you look at obesity like a disease, which some people do or an addiction, let's say food is an addiction, right? If you look at like an addiction, people, I'm embracing my alcoholism.

I'm embracing my crack addiction. I'm embracing. Like, why is it this one addiction where you could be proud of it? You can't be a proud crack kid. You can't be a proud. alcoholic, you can't be a proud heroin addict? I mean, none of us are doctors. You know what I'm saying?

But eventually, you know, your doctor is going to tell you, you probably need to get some of that weight up off. And she's going to, because she's rich. Yes, but she will get there in her time. And the beauty about a person like Lizzo, Lizzo is going to be Lizzo regardless of what size she is. You could tell it. That's just who she is.

She's a confident person. She don't give zero fucks. It don't matter if Lizzo weighs 140 pounds or 340 pounds. Lizzo is going to be Lizzo. Hey, listen, 100% I love the song. I sing the song. It makes me feel confident.

I don't know. Oh, I do know one song. Damn, what was the other one? What's the other one? I wear my head down, back and forth. That's Lizzo, right? Yeah. Yo, she's fire.

Music is dope. I guess what I'm trying to say is she's in a situation where at any point in time she wants to lose weight, she can hire physical trainer, she can hire a dietitian. Who said she's not now? I'm just saying she can do all these things,

but the people that she's speaking to that are going, You know what, I'm going to embrace all this kind of stuff. A lot of them can't. So now when she's ready to lose weight because she got to, that shit comes right off. And the people that can't lose weight just like that because they're in a shitty situation, they got two jobs. They got to eat fast food because they don't have access to the good food.

Like all of a sudden, they're in the situation like, whoa, whoa, I thought we were being fat together. What happened? Like. Yeah. What happened to Monique? Monique was what Lizzo's doing now. Uh-huh. And now she lost weight and people were kind of mad at Monique because, like, you're supposed to be in.

But Monique had to do it for health reason. Just like everybody else was. Like, listen, man, obesity is an epidemic in this country. We all know it. There's no need to act like it's not. And eventually your doctor is going to tell you, look, you need to lose some weight. That's it. That's really what it boils down to.

And we're going to still love the music. We're going to still love the personality. I have no clue what she looked like before I heard the song. I found out who she was later. I just loved the fucking song. Because it's a great song. So keep on making great music and, you know, take care of yourself. Or don't take care of yourself.

You don't owe it to anybody. But don't act like you're the pinnacle of health or it's okay. Yeah, we're doing shit you won't care about next week. It's just a hot topic, where we run through all the frivolous news of the week. I want to stay on this Lizzo for a minute because there's a lot of people who say things, you know, they ask the question,

should men comment on women's bodies, right? And American society has kind of created that system where men are always talking about women's bodies and vice versa. Like, this is the home of beauty pageants. Miss Universe, Miss USA, Miss America, Sports Illustrated swimsuit edition, Ebony Jet Beauty of the Week.

You know what I'm saying? It's always a thing where we're commenting on a woman's body or even women are always commenting on men's bodies. DiAngelo did a whole video butt-ass-necked with a six-pack. He didn't do that because he didn't want y'all to comment on his body. You know what I'm saying? So it's just like I guess in a lot of cases you've got to take the good with the bad, right? So if somebody sees a body they love like a J-Lo or Trina, whoever it is,

they commenting on it. If you see a Michael B. Jordan or DeAngelo back in the day, you comment on it. But if you see something you don't like, and it goes both ways for men and women. It's not like guys don't get ashamed for having the big-ass stomachs and looking nasty and fucking shit. You know what I mean? That's why you see a lot of guys getting in shape. It's guys right now that clown the old Gucci man.

I mean, it's girls that clown the old Gucci man because of how he used to look. But Gucci looked at himself. It's like, that's not what I want to be. I want to get in shape. So I don't, I think that's just kind of the American way to judge people by their bodies. I think it's a human way. I think it's a human way. I think that we sexualize things that we want to have sex with.

That's just natural. And I think maybe women do it in a little bit different way because they can sexualize certain parts of the body that maybe we don't care as much about. Yeah. But, you know, women are very picky when it comes to height. You know, like they're, women will just straight up say on their dating profile, nobody under 5, 6.

Michaela. Macal is 511 and we'll say that all day long. I don't date no short men. And if we were like, yo, no. girls with no tities. Now you're being objectifying or you're being a chauvinistic. Exactly. There's a double standard.

Yeah, it's definitely a double standard. But the reality is we do have standards. Yeah. Right. And standards are actually okay because they're baked into our DNA for like, you know, thousands of years of evolution. Like we like certain things. We like nice, I guess, nice skin or like supple breasts. All these things represent

I think when a woman is ready to produce children. I think fertility, right? So all these things are, they're not like, I'm a shallow guy. Even that is a judgment of a woman's body. Yeah, 100%. Did you see a woman you're like, oh, she's got subtle, what did you say?

Supple. I'm about to say subtle. Quietedity. She got quietedity. She's got supple breath. So, but back in the day, you probably looked at her for fertility reasons. Like, oh, she's ready to mate or whatever it.

You know what I mean? 100%. That's judging a woman's body. She is ready. Yeah. Yeah. Fucking slave masters used to judge people's bodies. I don't talk about that on black history.

I want that. Sean, man, please. Sean, please. Come on. What are we doing? What am we doing here? I'm just weird, man. It is, this, this is interesting.

I was in, I was in Hawaii, which is this fucking amazing place. Everybody should go to Hawaii outside of, like, the natural beauty of the culture is super unique and interesting. And, but they were talking about the sugar cane plantations out there. And there's these documents that you can read where they're looking at the type of people that they want to bring in to work the fields. And they're going through the different countries and seeing how they would work and wouldn't work with the fields. For example, they brought the Irish in. The Irish can't take the heat.

They're too tall to bend down and do the whatever. Black people, they can take the heat, but they're too tall to go down and be picking up the cane so they don't work as well. And then Filipinos at perfect height, they're shorter leg. They made it a science. Judging people's bodies. By judging people's bodies. It's literally like the NFL combine or like the NBA. They had the exact same look at it. What is the most efficient group of people that we can bring in here to get that job done? Let's be honest. The only reason we don't like when somebody judges somebody's body is when they're saying something negative. 100%. Because if they're telling you how fly you look and how beautiful you are, you got a fat ass, you got nice breasts. In the morning, these young ladies, Taylor, Sim, they walk in, oh, look a fat, oh, you got a fat ass, fat ass. I'm like, they do that.

But you're still judging each other's bodies? No, you know what? This is not fair because Sim and... What's the other girl named? Michaela. Sim and Michaela both like pussy. No, not Sam. Oh, so Michaela...

My bad. Label me a lesbian. My bad. My bad, Sam. But Michaela likes pussy. So if Michaela's like, you got fat ass, she means it. That's sexual harassment. That's sexual harassment.

Because if you were sex. If you sexualize someone, that's sexual harassment. It's like, no, that's a good point. And anything that you find sexual about someone else, don't you think that we should equate this? Anything you find sexual about someone else that you're sexually attracted can count as sexual harassment. For example, if a girl goes up to you, if a girl values financial success and she goes

up to you, she goes, okay, Charlotte, I see that, watch you got on us, a nice little Rolex. You are sexually harassed in that moment because she sexualizes your financial security. Sexually, really? It turns a girl on, a guy that can buy a watch like that. Financial security. Hey, there's a point here. Is there not a little bit?

I love the brilliant idiot hot thing. It's why we're the brilliant idiots, baby. That's why we're a brilliant idiots, all right? You know what I'm saying? Whipping bicks out? Where the buckets at? I'm trying to fill on. And if the buckets don't work, I'm going to stick my fist in it on the roll the attached to it.

There we go. That's what time they're on anyway. Let's go. You tell me what time it is. No, all I'm simply saying is the judging of people's bodies has been going on before us and it's going to go on way after us. Yes. That's just the way it is. And I'm not saying it's a good thing.

I'm not just saying it's a bad thing. It's just a thing. So to say should a man comment on a woman's body? I don't know. I really don't have an answer. I just know that's the way things are because women do it to men. Men do it to women. Men do it to other men.

I learn from women. You know how women be saying, ooh, you got a fat ass to each other and big teeth? That's why I objectify men. So how you do it to men? I do it all the time. What do you say? I killed M. Easy and envy and what? Drama.

Oh, all types of shit. Like what? I'd be like, y'all want to, I told Drama's drama's got a beard. Yeah, yeah. I'm going to brush your fucking beard. You know what I'm saying? That just seems nice. It seems like a nice thing to do.

And drama would be like, yo, you weird, bro. It's the truth, though. I tell him, I tell him, I tell him he pull his fucking pants up. Why? Because he's flirting? I'm tired of seeing your little red boxer brief that I've been watching for the past nine years. Pull your goddamn pants up, Envy. Envy really got no ass, huh?

Do some squats. No cheeks. You got no cheeks. No cheeks. No cheeks. Long beige back. Long beige back. You know what I mean?

How are you going to bust it wide open when you got nothing to bust? Nothing. And that's why he shows it off so much. He likes to do push-ups. you know what I'm saying with his hands sagging and he'll lift his shirt up a little bit so all his asses. Come on. You know what I mean?

We're ass-man. And they'll wonder why your motherfucker's saying shit. That's it. What are you wearing in? What are you wearing? Why would you wear that if you don't want me to say something? Thank you. You're, y'all missing the real point of it.

What's the point? What's the point? Because, like, for me, Sam McKell to do that, we're all from. See, that's what's wrong with you? We ain't talking about y'all. We're talking about y'all. Why would you even jump into this conversation?

Real talk, man. We're having a nice gay moment. and here you come wanting to add some goddamn women to the mix. This dick talk. Get the pussy talk. Dict talk. Dix segment. Let's go.

Exactly. Let's go. The hell is wrong with you. Come on now. Fuck out of here. But y'all are friends too, though. You're not going to do it to a random guy on the street. Oh, who says who?

You say, I'm going to walk up some random guy in the street. Tell him you got fat ass. Are you saying you need me to push this culture forward? Are you telling me I need to take this to the streets, Taylor? Is that what you're telling me? If you want me to objectify these guys, for real, for real, real tough. You want them to feel the pain that you felt your whole entire life.

You want me to go out there with these tims and these jeans on and start cat-calling motherfuckers! If I wasn't a married man, I'd take you up on you. Black man, no-chee! Black man, O'C., you know what I'm mad? I read that in a book a long time ago, though, From Niggers to Gods, man. What?

That was the name of the book, From Niggers to Gods by a Kill. And he said he was talking about how guys, objectify women and cat call women and comment on women and he was like, what if fucking Mike Tyson was walking the streets doing that shit to do slapping him on the ass, cat calling, what would you do? Hey, you got it, Mike. You got that guy guys do that too?

Yeah, but not as crazy. They usually lock him with some eye contact and then they try to see where you're at. This is what gay guys do. They'll be like this. They'd be like, then they wait for you to do something back to let them know it's okay.

guys, I'd be like, ah, I, Charla, I know you just ain't gonna walk by here with that little fat-ass

Charlotte and not gonna speak to me. Wait, what gay guys do you know? Talk like that. I need to meet these gay guys.

You even put his hand on his hip by a little teapot. Did you see that? Please tell me we got that. I'm Shala. I'm Shala.

I see you got rips in your jeans. Yo, a gay teapot would be funny as hell. Is there a... Pot short and stuff Where is my dick? Here is my mouth.

Oh my God, man. See what a little structure does in the show? A little structure, baby. That's a little format. Listen, Uncle Charlotte. He knows the game. This little formatted. He knows the game. We just need a little format.

Everything else is flow. We just need a little format. Okay. What did you think about... At what point did you know you were going with the mouth? originally. I know. I know.

It was the other part. Yeah, yeah. I was like, how do I get mouth? Should I start with dick? It didn't go to the mouth. I got the mouth. The mouth is here.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Now, Jeff Bezos, since we're talking about shit you won't care about next week, Jeff Bezos says he's donating $10 billion to climate change. Yes. I don't see the problem.

I don't know why people get upset at billionaires, when billionaires actually want to use their money for good. But why climate change? Why not to like homelessness? Okay. True.

You know? Not mad at that? I'm not mad at that? Yeah. I don't see, because if I was homeless, I'd be upset because, like, finally it's getting warmer,

right? Which makes me being homeless way better. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And now this guy's going to reverse global warming, so now I just get colder. So why don't you just buy me a house or at least give me an apartment

or something to stay in, and then I'm good. Listen, this is Leonard McElvey talking. Shalaman to God. I'm going to be honest with you. I want you all to be totally clear on this. I don't think there's anything that we can do to stop climate change. Now, I've done no research on this subject.

This is why we call it the brilliant idiots. Okay. Okay, keep going on this. I like this. I just don't think that there's anything we can do to stop the natural evolution of the earth. I think the earth is going to do what it's going to do. I don't go, fuck, how many rockets you shoot in the sky.

I don't care if you don't eat plastic straws on the beach and all that shit like that. The earth is going to do what it does. Have you ever seen a Caribbean island after a hurricane? Nope. A hurricane changes the whole structure and landscape of the island. When I go to Anguola, you know I love Anguilla. That's my favorite place in the world still to this day.

But there's certain places I would go in Anguilla. The beach looks totally different after the hurricane. Right. The water feels totally different after the hurricane. And when you talk to some of the locals, they'll tell you like, yeah, you know, the waters are a little bit rougher here since the hurricane. I don't know why that is. All I know is there is nothing you can do to stop the earth from whatever it's got going on right now.

Hurricanes are going to be stronger. Maybe that's just the way shit is supposed to be. Yeah. Earthquakes are going to be stronger. Maybe that's just the way shit is supposed to be. So maybe the expiration date on Earth is coming up for humans. Yeah. And, you know, Elon Mousin, all these guys are trying to get to Mars or all these other places, trying to find another place to inhabit.

And maybe that's just the right thing. Maybe that's what we got to do. Bro, we don't know if, you know, however many years ago when the dinosaurs went extinct. Yeah. Why? You understand what I'm saying? Yeah. We don't even know what was before the dinosaurs.

We think we know. Listen, I'm probably, it's people out there that's way smarter than me. Yeah. I'm probably listening to this. Like, shut the fuck up. You don't know what you're talking about. All I know is that everything runs its course. Yeah.

You understand what I'm saying? So if we're at the final meal, right? What do we do? How should we ride this out? What do you think? I just think we should live life. I don't think there's anything we can do when the earth is done. It's done.

If the earth decides to open up. right now, earthquake, swallow this whole building. What can we do? Bro, I was in Mexico and there was an earthquake. There's nothing you could do. You just sit there and you got to deal with it. If volcanoes erupts are up somewhere and that fucking lava destroy the whole city, what can you do?

Yeah, you can do nothing. If it's fucking, right now it starts snowing. Yeah. And it won't stop snowing. Yeah. And forecast is like, it's 10 inches of snow. And it's like, it's 20 inches and it's 40 inches. And the next thing you know, you're at my vertical leap.

You know what I'm saying? And you're at 60 fucking seven. Like, real seriously, what if it just snow? so much, never stops, and there's nothing we can do. So the snow just piles up, piles up, piles up. You can't even leave your motherfucking house. Eventually, you're going to die. The earth can destroy us at any time

it wants to. Yes. So I just don't think there's anything you can do when it comes to things like climate change. Should we treat the earth better? Absolutely. How? I mean, just respect it, bro. How? I remember a long time ago, you said, you said your dad always told you wear a suit to the garden.

Respect the building. Yep. It's a certain shit I don't do. Like, I don't litter. I don't know why I don't litter. Maybe it is because all of those, you know, don't litter PSAs back in the day. But I just think that's whack. I just think that's whack to throw some shit on the ground. Like this is the earth. Like this is, this is ours, you know what I'm saying? This is something beautiful that God created for us to inhabit. Like, why would I just throw some shit in the earth? I wouldn't throw some shit in the ocean. You know what I mean? Is this certain shit I just wouldn't do? Just respect the earth. Now, will you go as far as not

using plastic straws? No, I think that's too because paper. First of all, paper straws are the worst shit ever than it. It just don't work. You know what paper scrows make me want to do? Throw them shit in the ocean. As soon as I use the shit

and them shit crumbled a fuck up. Like, you ever been laying on the beach with a paper fucking straw and you're trying to suck your fucking drink and then that shit crumbled up and you can't even get your drink. You just take that shit, throw it in a fucking ocean. Goes in the turtle's nose

and you just drink to drink out the cup. Like paper straws suck, bro. Yeah. Now I've seen metal straws. Yep. But I wouldn't use them shit at a restaurant and shit seem unsanitary. But my wife got them at the house.

You know what I mean? So it's just like, it's just certain shit. I just think you should just respect the earth as best as you can. What drink do you guys have at the house that requires a straw? I never drank anything with a straw in my house. Really? Yeah. I don't know.

I just think she did it just to be woke. Yeah. Progressive. Environmental. Yeah. Yeah. Because I've never used them. I just started using the honey spoons.

What's a honey spoon? I'm old, so I do tea right before I go to bed, right? Okay. And the honey spoon. Mm-hmm. The honey spoon is a spoon made of honey. And when you make your tea, you put it in there and you stir it with it and it just melts. Oh, man.

Change your whole fucking life, bro. Because I'm the type of person that used to always use honey. Honey gets messy. You know what I'm saying? Like, you know, you squeeze it and then it be in the jar. It starts to look old. You don't know if it's good or not. Yeah.

That honey spoon, man, life changing. That's a genius idea. I fuck with the honey spoon. That's a genius idea. Question is, what do you do when you have cold tea? Who drinks cold tea? Isn't that what sweet tea is? No, I do that at home.

I haven't drank sweet tea in a long time. If I'm home in Stockin-Lina, I drink sweet tea. I was home in Stock-N-Ly this weekend. I didn't have any sweet tea. But in the summertime, in So I can't lie in with as hot as a motherfucker, some sweet tea hits the goddamn spot. Do you think that's why there's so many gay people in Atlanta? The sweet tea?

Yeah. Nah, it's because that sweet dick. Sweet D is what turned, that sweet D is what got people goddamn turned out in Atlanta. The tea don't got nothing to do with. That sweet deal Make you spill that tea. Will it? Will it now?

Will it now? Will it now? That penis will do that to you, man. Hit it again, Taylor. That penis will do that to you, man. Okay. All right, let's take a break for a second from this very well-formatted show.

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That's untucket.com and promo code idiots for 20% off your first order. Untuck it. What do you think of Bloomberg? I'm, um, I got to see what his policies are. At the end, right now I think they're doing a really good job of making him a villain. because he's a billionaire and allegedly racist, right? But I understand once you run for president, they're going to paint you as the worst thing that you've ever said, right?

And I feel like we live in this really shitty time right now where interpersonal relationships mean nothing. And the one thing that you did in your life completely defines you, right? Like, I don't care what anybody tells me about you. I've had enough hours with you, where if somebody reads a tweet of yours and then goes, this is who he is, I can go, no, I know him.

I've spent hours with him. That one thing you know about him doesn't override all the things that I know. And so with Bloomberg, I just got to know what he wants to do, what his policies are. And I think that he's really taken advantage of like a very weak, democratic.

Weak is an understatement. Yeah, just a pathetic democratic pool or whatever it is. Yeah. What I will say is this, they don't want Bernie to get the nomination because they know they can't corrupt him. So they're trying to find, oh, matter of fact, it's been a couple weeks since I was here. I said what was going to happen.

They were going to try to steal that shit from him in Iowa. And they did. And they realized that Pete will do whatever they tell him. So Pete is now their new, like, the Democratic elite toy. I don't know if he is. I don't know if he is. I think, you know, I was on CNN last week. I was on Aaron Burnett show.

What was your take? Well, what's your take on Bloomberg first? Well, I said that, you know, the best apology for any racist rhetoric, the best apology for any, you know, racist policies legislation is not only changed behavior, but a black agenda. You know, the same way that you created policies and legislation that oppressed and marginalized a certain community, then create some legislation and policies that can uplift and empower that community. Like, it's not even rocket science to me. Like, I'm not looking for a perfect candidate. Like, you know, especially when you're dealing with a, you're dealing with a 77-year-old. white man.

Yeah. He was born in 1942. This is... He was... Bloomberg. He's 78 now. So he was 22 years old.

Bloomberg is 78. Bloomberg turned 78 on Valentine's Day. Yes. He turned 78 on Valentine's Day. So you're dealing with a guy who turned 22, 23 years old when the Civil Rights Act of 1964 was established. You don't think that he was raised with a certain mindset?

Now, is it possible with him to grow out of that mindset? said, yeah. You know what I'm saying? Now at the time, when I was on CNN last week, I said, yo, the best apology is change of behavior and a black agenda. That's something I have yet to see from Biden. But Bloomberg actually has a black agenda.

Yeah, Biden's senile. I don't think Biden's all there. Bloomberg has a black agenda. It's called the Greenwood Initiative. I actually wrote some notes down of why I like the Greenwood Initiative. I like it because it's based around economics. And it's his economic justice plan for black America.

And it's a plan to create economic justice and create generational wealth for black Americans by addressing systematic bias and making strategic investments in communities and businesses, which I think is dope, you know? It sounds great. I just need to know the exact things that he's going to do to make it great. He has them. And I'm sure he has it outlined. I think it's like he wants to create a million new homes for black Americans.

I forgot. I forgot the details of it. But it's a good, I just want everybody to go out there and do their own research. There's no need for me to regurgitate things. Just go out there and look at the Greenwood Initiative and see if you like it. I like his criminal justice plan. What was this? He just announced that yesterday. His criminal justice plan is, um, he wants to reduce the prison population. He wants to soften federal drug and sentencing laws. And he wants to find community engagement and rehabilitation programs. It's a heavy emphasis on mental health for people once they get out of prison. Because prison is a very traumatic, you know, experience. So I mean, look, look, Listen, I like those kind of things, right? But I do understand that this is dream selling season. And I understand that they're telling people whatever it is that they want to hear. So what I needed to find out was, why do all these Negroes love Mayor Bloomberg so much? Why, with these racist policies he's implemented like Stop and Frisk? Why with saying things like, you know, the housing crisis happened because they didn't keep reinforcing redlining? Why all of these Negroes falling in line?

So I had to start asking questions in digging, right? and it's because he's been putting his money where his mouth is for years Give me example The YMI Which is Was it was a youth

Motivational initiative Young men's initiative Which actually I was a part of I forgot I even did this It's how long ago it was in New York It was like 2013, 2014 And it was an initiative That he started to address four areas

That were persistent problems For black and Latino men And it was education, health, employment in the justice system and he funded funded it with $30 million of his own money. He's own money. He'll do it. He's philanthropic as a motherfucker. Yeah. He's one of the biggest

philanthropists out there. But also, all of those mayors, like it was like 100 mayors that have endorsed Bloomberg. It's because his charity supported like 200 different cities with grants and a lot of other assistants and that was about $350 million. He dumped into those cities and a lot of those were in a city. He's giving away billions.

Full of black and brown people. You know what I'm saying? So it's just like, Like Birmingham, Alabama, he partnered with them on an early childhood initiative. Jackson, Mississippi. Birmingham, Alabama's 31% black. Jackson, Mississippi is 81% black. I'm not saying that, you know, Bloomberg is not a racist because his policies were definitely racist.

You know what I mean? But what I'm saying is it comes to a point in time where you have to learn how to use enemies. Because when you hire an enemy, an enemy sometimes will be more loyal than a friend. Because the enemy has more to prove. Yeah, he's got to prove something to. And I use the word enemy. And I know people say, oh, that's harsh.

But no, when you create the kind of policies that Joe Biden has created or Bloomberg has created, those policies were definitely enemies of black and brown people. So if you created those policies, then that made you an enemy of black and brown people. I think that, I think Bloomberg's a big data guy. And I think data is inherently racist, right? Because data doesn't take an account history. Right? When you're just looking at numbers, you're not going, oh, shit, what type of a problem? did these people go through to be in this situation?

The data just goes, hey, these are the people that are doing this. So when you make a policy like stop and frisk, I don't think the start of the policy is how can we oppress black and brown people? I think the policy, I think he spoke on this, was, okay, who is responsible for the most gun crimes in New York? And it was like overwhelmingly black and brown males, right? It was like 95% black and brown rails between the age of 16 and like 24, something like that. So the policy, the implementation of the policy, the execution of the policy is racist, right? Because it's based on data that doesn't take an account why these people even are carrying guns. What type of situations that they were forced to be in to have to, one, carry a gun maybe to protect themselves or two, to carry a gun because they're in a gang because that looked like the only.

way out in these neighborhoods. But when you're just a data guy, you don't think about those things. You just go, what is the solution to this? Yeah. And so when we say is Bloomberg racist because of the policies, I don't know if he could be racist. I'm not saying he's not. I don't know if I subscribe to that. I don't know if I specifically subscribe to that ideology because he's trying to create a policy that's going to fix a problem. If the data shows that this is the problem, then you address the data. The problem with Mike Bloomberg and his data is that when people started to see that the overwhelming amount of people that were being stopped by stopping fritz were black and brown and they weren't fine and shit. Right.

And other black leaders and lawmakers were trying to tell him like, yo, this shit is inherently racist. Like this shit is discriminatory like a motherfucker. Right. He wasn't listening. He was tone deaf to it. And it's like, yo, if you're targeting a certain group of people, how much are you missing? Because if I'm so focused on this. Yeah.

The white guy behind me with the AK-47 is just walking by me. if you go search those communities, you'll run up in some of these dorm rooms at fucking Harvard and Yale and wherever else and see if you don't find some drugs and all types of other shit. It is an interesting thing because we got to keep the same energy, right?

Because none of us seem to have a problem when every brown person gets randomly selected by the TSA. Right? When we go on a flight, you know what I mean? If Akash is flying with me, Akash is Indian. He's not even Muslim, right?

He's just brown enough. I'm not culture. So the TSA, shout to the TSA, but like they're basically, I assume, told, hey, the brown ones just give them a random selection, et cetera. And the rest of us just go, well, if that's what we got to do. You know why? I don't because they're 9-11.

All it takes is one incident to shift everybody's perspective on something. But that's what I'm saying. So imagine you're like someone who grew up in a neighborhood in Brooklyn is kind of rough and you've been robbed a bunch of times and now this stop and frisk comes about. And you're like, well, shit, all right, if they're TSA in Brooklyn, And everybody's scared to walk around with a gun now. So they're going to keep their gun at home.

Well, shit, I'm okay with that. And then they're like, well, yo, it's a little racist. Don't you think it's racist? They're just picking on that one group. And it's like, well, if I'm safer, that's the thing about Americans that I've realized. Like, like, Americans, we are intoxicated with our abundance, right? Oh, absolutely. Like, like, you're spoiled with abundance.

And here's the thing. When you have, when you have abundance, you don't care about truth. Like, we know they killed Epstein, right? Or we know. they killed F.C. or got him out or whatever the fuck happened. But our lives are so comfortable, comfortable, we're like yeah, okay. And we have no reason

that would, you know what other things do? You know what I'm saying? What you're saying is absolutely true. They try to steal the election from Bernie Sanders and Iowa again. We know they're doing it. I'm going to go back to your FD. You know why nobody cares about FD? Go. Because we know we'll never be in that position. We only feel that way

about things that could potentially happen to us. I will never have a pedophile island hosting hosting presidential candidates and presidents I got to look into this Anguilla. Man, shut

us. You've spent a lot of time in a hanguil. I'll just say I'll never be in that position. Certain things hit different when you can see yourself in that situation. Kobe's death hits different.

Why? Because you get up, you take your kids to the extracurricular activities all the time, whether you're driving a car or flying in a helicopter, just random routine

something happening on a Sunday. Nipsey's deaf hit different because, you know, you're helping something. somebody out. You had a store on a Sunday morning, your goddamn business, and you get gunned down. All I'm saying is, DeLary Epstein's of the world, easy to ignore. Bernie Sanders of the world, it affects us because you want that to be your candidate. But if that's not your candidate, you don't really give a fuck.

And you don't really need them. Like, most people in America are not suffering to the point where they're like, I need a savior to take us out. Right? And that is the beauty of abundance and how the government can really, or the powers that be, not even the government. powers to be can really get away with anything they want because they know that we're comfy. At the end of day, we'll be like, man, should I go out and protest that Iowa shit? Ah, fuck it.

They just got a new chicken sandwich at Popeyes. I'll just go eat that. You know, ah, fuck it. We got a new call-a-duty video game. There's always a distraction. And the distraction is abundance and comfort. If we're out here like suffering, suffering, suffering, suffering, we'll be lying the fucking streets.

We'll do it happen with Civil Rights Movement. Black people suffering, suffering, suffering, suffering? What were they doing? Every day. Protesting, protesting, protesting, protesting, fighting, fighting, fighting, fighting, every day. is a fact. And I think that sadly... They've lowered us to sleep, bro.

Sadly, that's what's going to happen in America for America to wake all the way to fuck up. Is we got to suffer. If he's going to be like an extreme natural disaster. Like, he's going to be an extreme natural disaster. Or it's going to be UFOs fucking returning. Or if it's going to be Donald Trump doing what I've been telling you all he's going to do and never leave the fucking White House.

Maybe it changed the goddamn constitution. Maybe. So he doesn't never have to leave the motherfucker fucking White House, which he's been priming us for for the past year and a half. I've been trying to tell y'all this shit and y'all look at me like I'm the goddamn monkey and the lion king Rafiki. But he's putting out, you put out the Instagram meme that lets y'all know. 2024, 2028, 2032, 2036. It's actually, everything Trump does to me is actually kind of brilliant in a lot of ways.

Yeah. Because it's such in plain sight shit. Like all those pardons he did yesterday, I missed it. Oh my God. He pardoned 12 people yesterday. During the debate. He pardoned the old, he pardoned the old owner of the 49ers.

He pardoned, like he pardoned a lot of people, right? Like 12 people. Mm-hmm. He's priming you. So when he pardons Roger Stone, that nobody even blinks. Oh, yeah.

Roger's out. Pff. Rogers out. He basically said it yesterday when he was doing the press conference. He's like, just watching. I think Roger's getting the raw. Yeah.

And there's nothing anybody or the, he has made the, The most abnormal shit in politics look completely normal and nobody even knows except for people that are actually politicians. I'll respect him if he does it before the election. Well, Paul and Roderstone? Because that means... Yeah, I'll let him sit for a little while. Well, here's the thing.

If you do it after the election... Well, you can't do it. He got to do it before the election. No, you could do it after if you get elected. That's determining if he actually wins. Right. But what I'm saying is like, if you do it before, you're basically giving your opponent some... ammunition.

So, but. It don't matter. No, no, I know. It don't matter. But I'm just saying I respect, I respect the, the loyalty. Trump is the Black Panther, bro. Son. You know, black panther did wore that fucking suit.

And the more the suit gets hit, the more power it is. Shut. Shut. The fucking Black Panther, right? You're talking about. Trump is Black Panther, not. Don't that hurt Trump. Ammunition.

We got to call him orange, orange cheetah. You shoot a fucking orange cheetah. You fucking hit Trump with a nuke if you want to. He's going to give me that energy right back. Y'all ain't seen nothing yet. Wait until Trump start locking up his political opponents. You think? Do I think?

I think you're over. I think you're a little paranoid about that. Y'all don't be listening to Trump. I listen to Trump. I actually watch I listen to Trump. I watch CNN. I watch MSNBC. I listen to the things Trump says.

Yesterday they had this whole thing on CNN where they had, it was Trump's advisors. You'd be in jail. That's what he said to Clinton. Remember? Yeah. Trump's advisors trying to talk Trump off the from going to get these motherfuckers now. Everybody that ran Trump through this goddamn impeachment shit,

Trump wants revenge. I'm looking for revenge. You wouldn't do that? No. Oh. I wouldn't. Charlotte, stop it, bro. Charlotte, stop it, bro.

Nah, for what? Charlotte, you are so, you are so. Come on. Yeah, take a big sip of waters. I'm the president. No, if you come from my neck, you try to destroy my legacy. trying to destroy everything that I am, everything that I built.

You think you're not going to get some payback? I'm not going to go out of my way to do it. I am. I'm not going to waste that kind of energy. I'm not going to go out of my way to do it. But if I get a shot, trust me, if I get a shot, if I get a clean shot.

You take it. Hey, buy don't secret service will. That's all I'm saying. You send it out the shooters? That's all I'm. I'm saying. Bernie, I'm going to tell you something. They are dropping the ball on Bernie. Who? Who? Who? Who? The DNC. Only because...

You all see how corrupt that they are, right? When I say Democrat, I just want to point this out. Democrats, like a lot of the politicians, a lot of state and city politicians, a lot of us Democrat voters, I'm not saying we're corrupt, right? What I'm saying is the powers that be who are the people who run the DNC and the people who fund all these politicians, the billionaires that fund all this shit? Billionaires that funnel the shit Don't go and do it themselves Because then they'll be hated

Right? Because you have to lie to the people And tell them, sell them the dream And then not deliver on the dream So they find puppets AOC is a puppet Right? They're all puppets

Like all these characters And the Republicans do it too They're all puppets Not Bloomberg No no, well here's the thing right You got more money Now that for the first times Are you seeing

Is you're seeing the oligarchs The ones that are the powers that be Coming down Optimity hills. Come down the hill and now they end the game. And Trump was one of the first people to do that. Now, Trump is not like a big, big, big time billionaire like a...

But Bloomberg is. But Bloomberg is. Like with the ninth richest person in the world or some shit like that? This is the real deal. Real deal. So now you see... Now, what I'm trying to point out is the Democrats, what they've always done is given the view, and I bought the dream, view that they were the honest, moralistic ones.

No. But when you look into their policies, they take the power out of the vote. Like the whole idea of a caucus You've removed The whole idea of super delegates You remove the power from the people Everybody got these cheek holes bro So this is what they're just trying to do

They're just trying to get the 51% They know that the Republicans got The religious folks They got maybe like country farmer whites All those folks They're like okay how do we get to 51 What's left? Black people sell them some dreams

You never gonna give them Gay people sell them some dreams You actually might give them They gave them the gay marriage shit They'll give you little tokens Here and there Yeah yeah yeah just to make They make it seem

like they're progressive and for the people. But they're just trying to get 51% to keep the powers that be in line. That's why they hate Bernie because they know that he interrupts the flow of the powers that be. They're cool with Bloomberg. They literally changed the debate. Well, he paid. He bought it.

$800,000 like two days before he announced his candidacy to the DNC. It was through like a subsidiary of the DNC, but it got back to the DNC somehow. He bought his way on to the debate stage. They changed the rules for him to be in the next two debates. He was in Nevada last night We recorded this on Wednesday So he's on Nevada tonight And he's gonna be in South Carolina

They are just as corrupt As the Republicans They are no different They are just as they lack All these people There are people in power They do not have the same moral compass As the rest of us, right?

So don't look at them Through these eyes These like doe-eyed lovebirds Like oh they're fighting for me No No Remove party and go which candidate Like you've been telling people for months

Vote your interest That's it Which candidate is saying you're black and you're rich? Who wants to take care of rich black people? You're black and your poor? Who want to take care of poor black people? Because that is what's going to change your life. Get out your fucking feelings.

For real. And get into your interests. You think Bloomberg does it Bloomberg. You think Bernie does it Bernie. You think Trump does it Trump. But vote who the fuck you think is going to take care of you? Because nothing will change if you don't. All I give a fuck about is people's black agenda.

I think right now Mike Bloomberg has the best black agenda. I think Elizabeth Warren's black agenda is really just a part of her. larger initiative. And it's that whole trickle-down shit. You know what I'm saying? Other than the black maternal stuff she got playing, but nothing is

targeting black people specifically. What about Trump? Does he have any black agenda? Kanye. I don't fucking know. I don't know. I've never even looked into Trump's black agenda. But listen, by the way, everybody should have one. You know? Mike Bloomberg, he says, he wants to create 100,000 new black-owned small businesses,

create one million new black homeowners, invests 70 billion in our 100 most disadvantaged neighborhoods. Re-invigorate efforts to defend civil rights, collect better data on hiring, pay, procurement, and lending. Look, listen, I don't, like I said, it's dream selling season, right? But that shit sounds good.

And once again, we have to learn how to use our enemies because when you hire an enemy, because that's what you're doing when you vote for a motherfucker president, you're hiring somebody. When you hire a former enemy, that person will go harder than a friend sometime because that former enemy has some, something to prove.

So when I see him giving $5 million to Stacey Abrams Fair Fight campaign, or I see him, you know, dishing out $350 million to, you know, these mares and these inner cities, when I see him dishing $30 million to the young men's initiatives for black and Latinos, I see a guy who is putting his money where his mouth is, and I give a fuck about that bag when it comes to black people, God damn it. I'm going to tell you, I was talking to one of my people's who's way smarter than me. and the person told me Stop caping for these holes

And I said We have to stop saying things like We're not capable for these holes And I'm just going to be honest I know we're in front of shows But this is what I said I said rhetoric like that is why niggas don't want to vote now But you all correct

They are our hosts So who's going to turn the most tricks for us We have to vote our interests If our interests of black people Currently out of all the candidates Bloomberg has put his money where his mouth is for black folks more than any of the other hoes. So I want

to hope that's going to bring us all money. All I care about is black people get into the goddamn bag. That's it. All that other shit means nothing to me. Racist rhetoric are like it's like, yes, hold him accountable for that shit. Hold that shit over his fucking head. But if this person is going out

of their way to prove that they want to write their wrongs, why the fuck wouldn't you be down for that? Because there's no perfect candidate. Yeah. Joe Biden, 94 crime bill.

Where's his black agenda? Bernie Sanders, voted for the 94 crime bill. Where's his black agenda? Pete Buttigiegs. He's got a history in South Bend. Black people don't like him. You know what I'm saying? So it's like, who you going for?

Elizabeth Warren, her black agenda, I don't like it. I just think it's that whole trickle-down, rising tide lifts all boat shit. And guess what? Black people's boat got a hole in it. Who's going to fix the goddamn hole in the boat? Mexicans. Man, shut up. Well, if Bloomberg's going to pay the goddamn Mexicans to fix the hole in the poll,

then fucking hire the goddamn Mexicans. Now black and brown people are putting more employed. I'm not mad about it. That's all I'm simply saying. All right, guys, I think that, uh... We got Asking Idiots, too? Oh, shit. Last segment, we closing out with As an Idiot.

The Bloomberg stuff was the Deep Dive. We don't have a name for the Deep Dive yet, guys. But my idea is... Should we call it Bucket Talk? Bucket Talk. Yes! Yes! We are calling it bucket talk.

Yes! And it's called bucket talk. God damn it. Because we go deep. Yes. Yes. Yes. Because it feels endless.

The discussion feels it could go on forever. I love shit like that. Yes. See how naturally that came? Thank you. I knew it was her name. I know the reason I couldn't come up with the name. You just go, yes, thank you like she said.

She goes, thank you. As the only woman in the room, she might have the bucket. Are you? Women like her might have been your inspiration shows. I'm just saying, you're right, you're right. I'm not. As imaging-wise, I hope they did. You don't have the bucket.

You got a little Sam pale. All right, asking an idiot. Five asking idiot questions. Let's go. Okay. All right. Oh, wow. This is sick.

All right, all right. All right. Okay. See, the God, how did you meet Wax? And how were you able to have a brotherly friend bond with him all the way to now? Oh, man. Great question. I met Wax in 2001.

That's a good one after. My wife was going to college at the University of South Carolina. You know, she's a game college graduated from University of South Carolina. And I was doing radio in Columbia, Saucan, at the time. I was working at the big DM. And I used to sell mixtapes. And so my cousin here in Jersey, his name is John. They call him Shalyn.

He was like, yo, I got a homeboy down there. You should go holl at him. And the homeboy's name was Louis. And so I went to go highlight Louis. And Louis was at the time roommates with wax and my other guy powder. And so it was just like I was over there selling mixtapes. And it's just one of those things, you know, you meet somebody and y'all just... Kick it.

Yeah, y'all just mesh. Like, it literally was just that simple. I went over there to sell mixtapes, laughing, joking. And it's just like, same shit we do now he was doing back then. Like, I would go to parties, wax would be with me. Because you got to understand, they was in college playing football. So I'm hosting all the parties. I'm hosting all the concerts.

We're running all through South Carolina. And he just used to roll with us all the time. And that's just, it just became a thing. Now fucking what, damn, 19 years later, 19 years later, that's still my guy. Did you guys ever have, like, beef or anything? I think that in the beginning, was there ever, like, any kind of discomfort? You know how sometimes when dudes meet, there's, like, a little friction and then also... Never.

Really? Never. Me and Wax have never had an issue ever. Like, I mean, we debate. All the time. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But there was never that, like, alpha tension between you guys. Wax is too good a spirit.

Yeah, he is a really good spirit. You know what I'm saying? Wax is one of the few dudes who don't have no jealousy, no envy. There's no... I think Wax might be too dumb to have an ego. being honest with you I thought he was going to say something really sweet bro I thought we were getting

like a tender moment I thought you were going to shed a tear dog I really thought it takes a high IQ to have an ego bro yeah and I'm not wax wax has a different level of smarts

right it's like he's got a lot of common sense yeah old man wisdom almost you know what I mean yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah but I don't think he lack I don't think he has the intellect

to have a ego. I don't think wax don't got no ego. No, wax does not have an ego when it comes to girls. I've seen wax in action. Wax don't try to get no pussy. Wax has never tried. Listen, I'm not even lying to you.

And the 19 years I've known wax, he's never tried to get pussy. You've been there. We've seen it. You're own eyes. Wax can be in the lobby. Yeah. And random women will just walk up to him. Yeah.

And it's just like they lose their senses. They get as dumb as him and just want to fuck. It's just like this energy that he gets I'm dead serious It's like some It's like some Lenny off Mice and men energy bro Okay speak of the devil Speaking of the fucking devil

Bro Speaking of the devil Angel get the fuck out the way I know I was just explaining why I think you've gotten so much pussy over the years Can you sit in the chair though So we can get you in a frame

Is that okay Why do you think Tell me what do you think I always say Because the devil was after me And I'm saying I always pray I wasn't supposed to have sex before marriage

and I was into the church like that. So I was like, the devil was after me. You keep throwing pussy at me. So you failed miserably. Oh, my gosh. You've been getting me all these years. Now, Wax, do you have a cock on your hat? Yes.

That's all. That's it. But the way she sucks me. I'm like, what the fuck's going on? We asked how you guys met. We asked how you guys met. We asked how. I was telling them how we met.

And they were saying, I was like, Zinaki. I said, I don't think Wax has an eagle. Or King of Pala. I think wax is too dumb to have an eagle. I don't even know what the eagle is. Exactly. An eagle, isn't that a bird?

The eagle's a bird, right? Ain't that a bald eagle? All right, next question. Ask an idiot. Let's go. This is a good one. From Devran Schaller, your thoughts on Wilder versus Fury in the rematch. Who do you reckon will win the fight, Charlotte?

Go ahead, Shios. I'll come after you. You're a boxing guy. Yo, dude. I think Fury's a better boxer. I think Fury is a better... I think he's more savvy in the ring. I think he...

I think everything about boxing, Tyson Fury, is better. But I would be fucking crazy to think Deonté Wilder... Athlete. Wilder... Athlete. Not only athlete, but literally, he said it perfectly.

He goes, you need to be perfect for 12 rounds. I need to be perfect for two seconds. It takes one shot from that guy and you go down. And yes, Fury got up. And I give him so much credit for that. He got up. I don't know if you get up if you get hit flush again.

The guy hits in an otherworldly way. And I do think Fury is better. I do think Fury can outbox him. I think the majority of the fight, Fury will be winning. But it only takes one. And so I cannot, as much as I actually want Fury to win, because I love his story, I love his comeback, I love the mental health problems, all that stuff. I do love it. I also am just so fucking amazed by the sheer power that this guy, Deonté Wother has, at 212 pounds to be the most powerful puncher in the history of boxing possibly.

And he's an American? Like, how can you not get behind that? So I think he catches him I think he catches him I think he catches him I think you go two ways A Wilde to knockout Are another draw

Only because Fury Won't stay down I think Furio will do everything You just said I think Fury will outbox him Be winning by points But I think Wilde'll do the same thing

Put him on the canvas a couple times Fury might get up It might be another draw You might get a trilogy I was watching the I don't even know what they call it The stuff leading up to the fight That Fox Be's showing

And Wilder's just said some shit. Wilder's like, I'm going to be more active. Right? Because when you go watch Wilder's last couple of fights, Wider wasn't either with Ortiz, he wasn't throwing a lot of punches. No. Because he knows he got that shot, he's just waiting for the right time. He said, I'm going to be a lot more active. So Widerd being a lot more active means that Wadder's going to be throwing a lot

more punches, which leaves a lot of other room for Fury to get hit. Another thing. But also Fury to counter. And counter. He did. I think that's a bad strategy by Wadder, but go on. Fury said something that made a lot of sense. Fury was like, y'all keep talking about that right hand. He didn't lay me out with a right hand. It was the hook. It was a left hook.

Yeah. So think about that. Why they didn't even touch him with the right. No, no, while they hit him with the right. He goes, it was straight right. Yeah.

And then as he's falling down, the hook sits him down, whatever. It was the right that started. Fury was like it was like it was the hook that dropped me. You know what I'm saying? So I don't know.

I'm going, I go with Wilder's just too much of a CO artist, but I agree with everything that you said about Fury. Fury is a bad motherfucker in that ring, bro. He's bad man.

He doesn't have knockout power no more, though. He doesn't have knock about. He never had power. that weight, though. But say again. How much he weighed? So he came up. This is the other thing.

This is why I got concerned. So he's been fighting around 255 for past fights. And apparently his camp released that he's going to come in around 270. So that's a 15-pound. Just the weight alone on that lane is going to hurt a Wilder. Now. Wilde look good too, bro. He's always looked.

He's fucking cut out of marble. He's unbelievable. But I'm concerned about Fury because you put on 15 pounds. Now, 15 pounds for a guy who's 6-9 and 270. It's not that much. But against Wilder, you need to be light on your feet, bro. You need a move. You don't want to stand right in front of Deontay fucking Wilder.

So I tend to believe that adding any weight could potentially slow him down and being slow against the most concussive puncher in history. You're going to sleep. Or he's not going to sit there and he's not going to feel it like that because you got more weight on you. Just them extra punches are probably going to try to perish. They ain't going to pitch that 270 like that. Yeah. So you like the heavier weight? You think it's better for him.

I mean, I like him more about the 250. That 270 does change everything. It changes everything with boxing. But he's a good counter, y'all. You got to watch that other guy. You can go. I'm going wild for the knockout, though. Come on.

Yeah. I got locked out of the iPad. Another question. Let's do one more? I think we should do four. Okay, so we did two? I was thinking five, but maybe that's too much. If they're good, we do five.

Um, okay. Clairvoyant underscore 170 asks. Which would you rather drink? A cup of your mom's period blood or your dad's sperm. Come on, yeah. Come on, man. I have the water's not available. What the fuck, Gingerelle?

Come on. Where's the sweet tea at? Like, come on. What are you talking about? Clarebred. You thought about that one a little too hard. Mom's period blood in a fucking heartbeat. Okay, vampire.

Real talk. Come on. You'd rather drink your dad. You'd rather drink your dad's cum than your mom's period. But blood is blood. No, blood is like girls' waste leaving their body. Say what? It's waste leaving your body.

They say it's worse than shit. What? Period. Blood is like waste leaving the body. No, it's not. It's a uterine lining. It's not worth of shit. It can't be worse than shit.

It's not worse than shit. Is it worse than cum? You're going to drink cum. You're going to eat cum before you eat period. I see so many girls eat cum and they're not sick. You eat blood. You're done. You're fucked up of blood, bro.

So you're saying. So you're saying you would drink cum. You know, come his blood, though. I get it. Come his blood? It is. I'm going to walk out of here, bro. No, it is.

It is. It is. Did he just drop the IQ level on this fucking room? No, it is. It's a whole human. What? No, it's a half of human. The other half is in the ovary.

It's not a whole human. It's not, so it's like the head? It's just a little bit of human. Otherwise, every time you jerk off, you'd be killing babies. Duh. What? Why do you don't be seeing him swimming around inside the, um, how big are you're sperm, bro?

You got fucking salmon sliding out of your dick Oh, never mind. Blood and Siemens is actually... If you got blood and your semen, something's wrong. That's all I'm saying. Yeah, that's a problem. Yeah. But for real, I definitely would go blood over my dad's spurned, dude.

I understand that. That's weird. Do you guys be eating their stuff all the time? They do. You put too much thought into that one, Clara of Moyette. Yeah. Like, come on. Um, is it gay if you're able to give yourself a BJ?

What was that last? Is it gay? Yeah. No, it's not gay if you try to suck your own dick. That's like saying it's gay if you masturbate. No, he's putting meat in your mouth. So? It's yours.

It's your meat, dog. You got another man's dick in your hand when you're jacking off, or you got your dick in your hand when you jacking off? It's my dick. So what, it's still a dick. It's still a dick. I get what you're saying. So technically, we love masturbation.

We really do love rubbing our dick. So you can't ever say You can't ever say you never gave a hand job If somebody says you have you ever given a hand job You have to say yes Yeah That's kind of wild though I see what you say it but

And when wax terms No No what do you mean? It's regular It's mine though So I'm just making sure So what's fucking your own dick You just upgrade you

No it's not It's like Jerking off it's like you're just shaking extra You go to the bathroom Okay That's still playing with your dick No you're shaking off So this is like

You ever eating like Mexican food You get some sauce on your fingers you go, ooh, you've licked your own fingers, girl. You've lit your own fingers, you know. I don't know.

I'm putting gloves on from now on. That's like a condom, didn't it? You've licked your own fingers. You can suck your own dick with a condom and then it's all right? It's like for gloves on. That's kind of wild. Could you suck your own dick with a condom and it's all right?

No. By the way, God knows what he was doing. Because we could suck our own dicks, we would. Oh, 100%. And we've tried. Praise God. You've tried. Praise the Lord.

You put the extra rib. How are you going to tell us what to do with our dicks? See, this was wrong with y'all feminists. Yeah. Okay, don't tell men what to do with our dick. We can not suck our own dicks, Taylor. No, I saw it. What do you mean?

Yeah, the guy's a guy who's cutting his own dick. He's a comment. No, no, no, no, he can suck his own dick. Really? Yeah, he said it feels a lot more like sucking a dick than getting your dick suck. He's a contortionist? No, he's just a comedian. Or a conformist.

He's conforming to dick sucking, I guess. Jesus Christ. He's like practicing. We've all tried it. We've all tried it. You've never tried it. I never tried it. You've never been hard, and you've never been hard.

you were just like, uh, bro. Never once. I want to see your goddamn comedian friend. I would like to see that trick. Bro, he did it. Son, he did it with us

on an episode of Ask Guy Code. Really? You don't remember him? No. He gave us up his name. No, but he showed that he could suck his own dick. Really?

Matt Brousard, bro. Matt Brousard, bro. That's better than twirking. If your jokes are bombing? And he was just like, well, watch this. Good trick.

Whoa. You'll kill with that. You don't remember Matt. He was on guycoat with us. I don't remember that. Ask Guycoe. Remember there was like a round table type of thing? I don't recall. Maybe you weren't on that episode. Did you have a try? Well, suck my own dick.

But how can't you say that? Every man has tried to suck their own dick, yo, listen, bro. My chick better be all the way to fuck out here. That's the thing. Or you just flip it back. Or you go. Why you start screaming at your dick just now? Because I'm like, what the fuck? He thought it was a microphone. What the fuck is that? Yo, I don't know. That's kind of wow.

What? I ain't get blood. God ain't blessed me to want to have to suck my own dick. He gave, he put something here. I guess it's your rib cage to prevent you from doing that kind of shit. Thank God you did that. I appreciate you. We're probably more productive as a society. Men probably wouldn't even... You know how embarrassing that would be?

It's embarrassing when your mom walks in on you jacket off. Can you imagine your mom or your dad walking in on you? You got your whole dick in your mouth? Your dad confused this shit. Like, is he gay? Yeah, for real. Like, what the fuck? Or you're just narcissistic?

This motherfucker got an ego, bro. You got some balls, bro. You're just wild. Now, you can suck your own balls. Wow. Nah. What? You all get offended if you all like...

What did you say, Taylor? Put your lips on the Mike Taylor. What do you say? If you're a girl sucking your dick, right? And you come. Are you kissing her afterwards? No. No.

Why? Because the cum is there. Because the cum is there. It's yours. So what? What if my shit was in her mouth that I'm supposed to kiss her? I'm not going to tell her. I'm not going to kiss her.

I gave a little peck here. Oh, come on, bro. Come on, bro. And I'm going to tell you, like, you'd be wild a little bit. Come on, y'all. She got to drink something. She got to drink it. It's not on her lips.

Depends how I'm coming that day. Get out the way. Just, why can't you have a swig of water and get it all out and rub your mouth? Why are you so like? Oh, bruce. I don't kiss my girl after she eats cilantro. Oh, my onions. Well, onions.

It's mad shit. I don't kiss my girl after she eats. Her breast smells bad. I don't kiss her. Come, I'm gonna tongue her down, you're crazy. All women should attempt to kiss their man after you give them head. Just to see, just see how much they love you.

Just test them. Just test his head movement. No, see if he's sucking somebody else's dead. I'm gonna look like Tyson Furious. That's what the hell is going on. Until you get that right hand. Boom! You know, a girl, I forgot who it was,

but they said that after they swalled a guy nut and then they spit it back in his mouth. Fuck! You see what I'm saying? Yeah, exactly. Hell up. Your man is second did. That's how you did that shit before

and you want to see if how we're going to react to it. Like if instead we were like, yo, that's just dope. That's me. They call us you the snowball, right? That's a snowball. You know you heard it too then. Never heard it. How are you going to say the snowball?

You never heard of it? This guy's so crazy. You were around me. Help me out. All right, then. You better say something. What happened? It was on the show, man.

Somebody said they spit the shit back in the girl mouth. I never heard that from you. Horrible decisions, maybe. Somebody was nasty. It might have been one of them. All right? Like I made it up I never heard it

Wax's watch is so big Have you seen this Did you take that shit off the wall This shit is massive Bro It's the whole You got flamethr You got flamethrle

You got flamethrle I feel like an iron man suit Going to come out of that shit Hey man I just want to tell you all We've been doing brand this This is the 300 of what episode During the fourth episode First episode we ever did a format

I think it went great. Yeah. It's right on time. Right on time for the next level. Okay. All right. You got to do what we got to do. I don't know what that means.

Shall we get out of here? Yeah, we're done. Shall we take us, bro. As always, if you listen to this podcast, you think we're smart, you think we're intelligent, you think we're brilliant, you're absolutely right.

If you listen to this podcast and you think we're just a couple idiots who don't know shit, you're right too. It's the brilliant idiots podcast. Thank you for listening. Peace.