The Brilliant Idiots - Step In The Name Of MILF

Episode Date: April 2, 2020

This week Charlamagne and Andrew record remotely and discuss the latest with COVID-19, Trumps performance, Cuomo's possible nipple ring, How porn has gotten out of hand, Drake posting his kid, and more!!! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

To the guy who said, I'll marinate the chicken, then forgot. Hi, you're a Safeway PA announcer here. We've got pre-marinated meat. So all that's left is pretending you made it yourself. It's so stupid. It's positively brilliant. Yep, Shalamane the guy. Andrew Schultz.

We are the brilliant idiot's podcast. And look, man, we don't got no fucking ads. That corona shit real, bro. Yo. Now I'm ready to get off. Hey, now I'm ready to get off quarantine. Why? We ain't got no ads.

We got to get back in these streets. We got to get back to work. You got to start shaking his ass, God damn. We might as well start off with positively brilliant, positively idiotic.

That's not what it's called. Positively brilliant or what a fucking idiot. Basically it's the segment where we salute somebody for doing something brilliant this week and we chastised people for being fucking complete idiots. What did you see brilliant this week,

Shotsie? Yo, I don't know if it's true, but I think Andrew Cuomo got pierced nipples. I thought that was brilliant. What? You didn't see all you didn't see all those pictures on the internet where he's in a white polo and he got the barbell nipple rings? No. He either has pierced nipples or he has three nipples on each nipple.

I haven't gone down the Cuomo rabbit hole like that. I know Cuomo was sweeping the nation and everybody's falling in love with him. But I didn't, I haven't checked out his backstory like that. Hey, I'm deep. I'm in the wormhole, bro. I got nothing but time on my hands. I haven't gone past him having dinner with his family when he was young. He said that when he was young,

they used to have these big Italian dinners. Yeah. And he was saying that's something that people need to start doing during this time. Is that big Italian dinners? Or big family dinners. Did he share how many times their uncle or grandfather screamed the N-word at those dinners? No. He said it was a lot of them, though.

Say what? He said it was a lot of them. but he never said anything about them screaming to N-Whor. You think he screams N-word? Not him, but grandfather, Italian grandfather? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Most grandfathers, I would say most grandfathers have said the N-word. What do you think?

Most grandfathers, yes. I don't know about Italians, though. See, I don't know the relationship between Italians and black people. Y'all love each other and hate each other at the same time. Y'all want to be each other. Well, rappers love the mafia. aspect of it. But then that's stereotypical to say that all Italians are like

mafioso though, right? No, not all Italians aren't mafioso, but all Italians are Italian. Do you know what I'm saying? Like, not every square is a rectangle, but every rectangle is a square, whatever that term is, the opposite? Yeah, but see, like, you know what's so crazy? Italians, they don't have the worst stereotypes, but they do have stereotypes. Because you think about Italians,

you think spaghetti, pizza, like all of that. You know, they have their own distinct food. I wouldn't even say that's a stereotype. They specifically have their own distinct food. They love food. Right? They love food. And then you think the mafia and you think Mario Brothers.

Yo, son. Yo, the Mario Bros. are really the least Italian Italians. Really? I mean, when have you known Italians to be plumbers? Yeah, they're Italian with Mexican jobs. They're Mexicans. Yes. Luigi is a super Italian name and he don't look.

Mexican, he's like tall. It kind of looks like me in a lot of ways. But Mario, what was the last time you saw an Italian wear some overalls, yo? Be honest, bro. Mario's more of a Hispanic name, but they say it Italian, Mario. It's a me, Mario. Mario. But it's more of a Hispanic Latino name.

Yeah, the mushroom shit is weird, too. I'm trying to think. But the plumbing, I don't know if Italians are plumbers like that. I'm going to be honest with you. Yeah. But we started this because you said Chris Cole got pierced earrings. Why is that brilliant? nipples.

Pierce nipples. Because I think he's letting everybody, like, he knows what his nipples look like. Like, you know when a girl got a nipple piercing and it pops through the shirt? Yeah. Right? They know it's popping through the shirt. They chose not to wear the bra. So if he's out there in a white polo, right?

You already know white polos are almost a little bit see-through, right? And he got the barbell in and it's poking through the shirt. I think he's letting him, I think he's just letting everybody know, yo, be yourself. Like, I'm a progressive guy. You know what I mean? He's trying to look more. relatable. Yes, to the majority of the population that has nipple piercings. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I mean, listen, nipple piercers are a relatable thing because whether you have them or not, you know somebody who

got them. Do you know anybody with nipple piercings? Yes, you know, any scrippers you see with nipple piercings. Yes. Or just women, are just women in general? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. What do you think about men? Yeah, what, go. Oh, yeah, I don't know no, I don't know no, I don't know men with nipple piercings. You don't know any men with nipple piercens. No, no, no, no. I personally don't. I'm not saying that they don't exist. I just don't know any. Hold on one second.

We got to stop down. Hold on one second. We just got some sort of, was it Zoom's failure? Oh, and Taylor's trying to produce. What happens? So she stops screaming. She stopped sharing her screen so she can show us

Andrew Cuomo's nipples. Yo, Taylor, you just freaked us all out. Just take, we got this, Taylor. Hey, Taylor, you Google those nipples by yourself. Let me see. I want to see now. The headline says, Andrew Nipples Piercings.

What does it say? Andrew Cormos, Nipples Piercings, take us, take our mind off coronavirus. Hold on a second. Are we still recording? We are?

Okay, good. But, hey, Taylor, remember, whatever is on your screen, we are recording on our end where we're recording all this. So you can't leave Sharla. Don't get Charla off the screen.

Do you get out on the screen? I see all they do. Taylor, what I want you do is take your computer and put it in a different room. and lock it in there and then you go watch some Ozark. Okay?

That's what I want you to do because right now we're looking at Andrew Pullman those nipples, okay? I want you to put it back on Charlotte. All of a sudden, Taylor want to be a visual producer. There we go. Now we're back on Charlotte.

Now whatever this is, you leave it there. Don't touch your computer ever again. All right? Listen, I want to give a, what a fucking idiot. Well, first of all, we can stay on a positively brayer real quick.

I want to say it is absolutely amazing to me how Andrew Cuomo in a couple of weeks has become a media darling. This really, really, really, really, really, really, shows you how much lack of leadership is on the Democratic side. The Democratic presidential candidates should be fucking ashamed to themselves. I've been saying this for the past two or three weeks,

but nobody listens to me because I got a fucking list. I've been saying that they need to be offering counter programming to fucking Donald Trump every day, every day that Donald Trump was on doing those press conferences. Joe Biden should have been pulling up his fucking webcam at home and fucking just talk to the American people.

That's literally all Chris Cuomo was doing. Don't get me wrong. Chris Cuomo was a governor, so he's an executive, but he's still just up there providing comfort to New York City and in the process to the fucking nation. That's it. Yeah.

That's it. And he has become a media darling. so much so that people are saying maybe he should run for fucking president. I told you. You know why? Because Joe Biden doesn't look like a fucking leader. And I know what this all boils down to. Nipple rings.

Nope. What? Joe Biden's in his fucking house quarantined. And he doesn't have anybody to help him work. None of this shit. Charlemagne. You don't know how to do Zoom. Charlemagne.

You don't know how to FaceTime. He can't connect with people. Charlemagne. Joe Biden has been dead for six years. We all know this. It's weaken at Bidens. They are propping that man up. Shout to Simone Sanders.

Y'all saw how Simone bodied that person that went after Biden, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Simone has been carrying around Joe Biden for the last, whatever, six months or however long he's been campaigning. This is a senile man. He doesn't know what the fuck is going on.

He doesn't know what year it is right now. He doesn't know what quarantine is. He thinks it's a drink that tastes like chocolate milk. He has no clue what the fuck it is. He has no clue what's going on. He's like quarantine. Yeah, I see him. Quarantine is the D.

on Jimmy Fallon. He's with that group. He's with that band, that band the plants. Honey, can you get me a cup of quarantine? I just need something sweet before we go to bed. This shit is bad, bro. This shit is really bad, man. And it's not going to get any better because if the fight comes down to Biden and Trump,

which it probably will be, a lot of it isn't going to be based on, you know, the broader picture, right? Because before coronavirus, they could talk about, you know, climate change and, you know, gun control, things like that, right?

They could take Trump to task on things like that. Now, all that shit seems this big. Because all people are going to care about is this one moment right here. Yeah. And how Donald Trump responded to the coronavirus shit

and how he put $2 trillion into the ecosystem and how motherfuckers got checks. So now all they can do is, you know, point the finger at Donald Trump and say Donald Trump looks completely insane and he's incompetent, but you really want Joe Biden to be the guy pointing to finger

calling somebody insane and incompetent. Yeah, like what would Biden really have done? Like, what would Biden have done if he was in power right now? I think the only thing Biden would have done better is not respond quicker. And what I mean by not respond. I don't mean respond to the actual pandemic. I mean, Biden, I don't think, would have been

front and center so early talking about this pandemic. I think he would have, the way you see Trump now, putting the experts out there first, the doctor, the other guy that's become a star, Dr. Fauci. Fouchi. And then it's, um, the woman too. I can't remember the woman's name. But he's always moving out of the way and letting them talk now. I think Joe Biden would have done that from the beginning. Therefore, therefore Joe Biden wouldn't have took so much heat because Joe Biden wouldn't have jumped out there and said, oh, it's a hoax. You know, we got it under control. Joe Biden would have just let the experts speak.

But I think that this is just one of those things, man, that you can't even really put the blame on any person. Like, this is just something that's unprecedented. America's never seen this. This is out of fucking control. We've never seen this before. Dude, and it's about to get crazier, man. I was talking to a doctor last night,

and I actually can't say his name because they're legally not allowed to share what's happening in the hospitals, right? They can get in trouble. they can get like, I don't know if about disbarred, but they can get, you're punished in some way. And he basically said this, here's the problem, right? Right now, they're handling the capacity, at least in New York, pretty well. But here's the problem. It's going to continue to go up as the virus spreads.

And then the big issue is going to happen when all the health care workers get it as well. So health care workers are there. They're in contact with these people. The little masks and shit ain't going to do nothing. They're going to get the virus as well. then they can't be in the hospital because they could just share it with the other people. So they have to go home.

So you're going to lose 10%, 20%, 30% of your healthcare workers. You got healthcare officials quitting now. They're quitting now because, you know, they're not properly prepared because Niskin going to the water fucking idiot segment. Right. God damn Donald Trump sent 17.5 tons of PPE to China back in fucking February. What is PPE? Equipment.

Mask, gowns, all. It's personal. I think it's personal. I don't know what the other piece stands for, but I know the E stands for fucking equipment. So it's the equipment that the doctors wear. It's like the fucking shit that protects them. It's the hazmat suits.

That's why you see the nurses in the fucking hospitals wearing trash bags and shit because they don't have the proper equipment. Yeah. And back in February, when the World Health Organization told everybody that, you know, this pandemic is probably going to hit

and America didn't have the resources to deal with it. Right. Right. Even though Donald Trump had that information, he sent 17.5 tons of personal equipment.

Respirators to to fucking China. Mr. America first. That's a fact. Why do you send it to China? What was the issue over there? What do you mean? China got hit crazy.

Oh, he sent it during the coronavirus? That was February. Ew. Yes, like February 15th. He sent all the equipment over to China. So now you got everybody. That's arrogance, though. That's just straight up arrogance. That's just straight up thinking. Nothing like that could ever happen in America. America's got this invisible force field around it that protects us from shit like this.

He never thought it would happen. And it motherfucking happened. Now you got those, now you got those healthcare workers and healthcare officials in fucking hospitals unprotected. And that's why they're quitting. And I don't blame them either. Yeah. I'm playing devil's advocate here. Is it possible that a, you know, Fauci or one of these guys, advised Trump and said, hey, if we stop the virus in China, there's a way better chance of it not spreading at the same speed to these other countries. So why don't we throw equipment to them now so they can control it before it spreads around the world? Maybe. Is that a possibility? Maybe. Because I mean, you know, Trump did, if I'm not mistaken, he stopped all travel from China and into China,

if I'm not mistaken. Right. Or he stopped all, he stopped all travel. I mean, do you need to stop that? So maybe Are there really people that are going to China right now? Like, I'm almost like, just let him go. If you're willing to go to fucking China, if you're willing to fly into Wuhan for the weekend, I'm totally fine with you getting coronavirus. I don't think people knew, bro. Corona didn't have the marketing you had now, bro.

I'm saying now. I'm saying now. Yeah, yeah, yeah, right now. People are like, we're stopping flying right now. It's like, you don't even need to do that. We're not going to go. I mean, you can say the same for New York, too, though. Yeah, but it's like when I hear people say,

like, you know, you're not welcome in our hood. It's like, I'm not going. It's dangerous. You could say the same for New York. What you mean? I wouldn't come to New York right now. Nobody's coming to New York. I walk down the streets.

It's empty, bro. Nobody's here. Nobody's here, bro. And you know what? Will Smith was making a big deal about I am legend. Like it was, you know, he was suffering out there with nobody around. He must have not been in New Yorker because it is amazing. It's beautiful to walk down the street to have nobody there.

Me and my girl went for a jog this morning. Nobody there. Absolutely nothing going on, dude. Could you fucking spoiled American? stop jogging. Why? No, seriously, seriously. Is it possible for Americans to absolutely just stay home for two weeks?

Charlemagne, your black privilege is showing right now, okay? White people need to work on our speed. It's not natural. It's something that we have to work on every single day to maintain. We cannot take two weeks off in a quarantine or we'll slow down to molasses. I'm telling, listen, we really, all we need is two weeks. If everybody just stays on for two weeks, right now, more than 80% of the country has a stay-at-home order.

Yeah. That don't mean shit. Fuck the order, bro. You gotta be a stay-at-home mandate. Stay-your-ass home. Are you getting locked up? Are you motherfucking going to get a big fine? We're going to put you in the same cell with Harvey Weinstein.

Like, you've got to fucking... Just stay home for two weeks. Yeah. Two weeks kill us, bro. Say what? Would two weeks kill us? Bro, it's so... You know what?

I hear you. You're 100% right. Here's the problem. is that motherfuckers live in shitty homes, man. It's easy when, like, all these celebrities and stuff in their mansions are going, stay at home, let's sing a song together, let's do all this. It's like, shut the fuck up.

There are people sharing a studio apartment with five other family members, do you know what I mean? They got to get out. They got to fucking get out, man. They got to get out. That makes sense. You ever go to Harlem or you go fuck Harlem, Brooklyn, any neighborhood, right?

And people just hang out on the stoop downstairs from their apartment for no reason. They just hang out on the stoop. they got to get out. They got to get out. Yeah, you in that one bedroom apartment. That's your tight, bro. New York is different.

So I'm tired of people in L.A. telling us what to do and how to quarantine. We cannot quarantine. We'll kill each other if we quarantine, bro. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Let me quarantine in your apartment. Let me quarantine in your house and your mansion. I'd love to.

That's the thing they never do, right? They never go, well, just come on over. We'll take some people in. Yeah, I saw people mad at David, David Geffen. Because David Geffen, you know, posted a picture from his, goddamn yacht in the middle of the fucking ocean somewhere. I hate it.

And he was like, he was like, look, stay in the house and stay home, whatever, whatever. I would be honest with you. You can't be mad at David Geffin. And the reason you can't be mad at David Geffen is because David Geffen played, you know, with the cards he was dealt. And if that's his life, if he's acting his wage and his wage is on the middle of a boat in the fucking ocean, let him live his fucking life. Not everybody got to give advice, bro.

It's like not everybody got to give it. But like now I completely understand. Like I've had a lot of comments as we've been doing this show, right? I've had a lot of comments and there's been a lot of people that are of color going, hey, Schultz, you don't understand what it's like to be a person of color. So you might not understand what it's like to be in this situation, right? You'll react. And that's, I completely understand that now that I hear celebrities giving advice during the pandemic.

Right? I completely understand because you don't understand when you're a celebrity, you don't understand what a regular person got to go. go through in this shit. They're still human though. No, they're not. I get what you say. No, they're not.

And we should literally charge their fucking yachts when they show up back. If a celebrity on a yacht gives any advice on how to handle a pandemic, the second their yacht comes back to the port, we should charge it and raid it and throw them off the back of it. No, I don't say that. Why? 100%. 100%. But you do know you're talking about yourself, right?

Yeah. Because you're going to continue to grow and going to continue to evolve in this game. So people shouldn't listen to. to you because they're successful? No, no, no, no. They shouldn't listen to certain things. Like, I'm not going to tell people how to quarantine, given my situation. But all David Geffen said was stay home.

He don't got to say that. It just so happened. He's not even home. He doesn't be a yacht. This motherfucker couldn't stay home. Literally, he couldn't. He was like, I need to be on the open water. Suck my dick.

No, by the way, those yachts like that, those are homes, bro. Yep, you have your home away from home, on the water. That's easy to go on that home. And then you pull up to another home. There's all these fucking homes. What do you think the arc was? Say again? The arc was just a yacht, bro.

Son, it was, it was a zoo yacht. But you take the arc waters. That was the first Disney cruise. Real talk, bro. And, yo, think about it. How is it even difficult to get people on the yacht? Like, all you have to say is, yo, there's giraffes. Your kids are going to love it.

Bro, that's what I'm saying. That's what I'm saying. Y'all shame David Geffen. You got to shame Noah too, bro. The only difference between Noah and David Geffen is Noah built his goddamn yacht from scratch. he did build it from scratch and David Gavin had Mexicans do it.

That's it. It was out in that goddamn sea with all the animals having a good motherfucking time. Do you think he was having a good time? Do you think he was just scooping up elephant shit the entire time? No, I think he was having a ball

because you got to think about it, right? If Noah was anything like me. Bro, was Noah the first Tiger King? What was the first Tiger King? You know how I know Noah was having a good time? Because if Noah was anything like me, Yeah. He likes to be right.

And that's, bro, that's a big W, bro. No, the, Noah, what Noah was

telling them motherfuckers was a big W. Just think about the heat he caught for that shit. Yo, it's true. And think about, think about,

like, how excited he was every time it would rain and how disappointed he was, it wasn't the final one. Ooh. I don't think it was raining

at all, though. I think it was a drought for a while. Oh. If I remember the story correctly, it was a drought for a long time. Yeah.

started working. Everybody would walk up to him when he was building this shit like, yeah, you're fucking tripping. You know, whatever they say, you fucking, and look at this. He probably was laughing at him.

You know, I'm about to say taking pictures, but they had no phone back then. But they were just calling people to come over and look at this stupid motherfucker Noah. You know what I'm saying? And then when this shit started raining and wouldn't stop,

there was nothing better than Noah getting on that goddamn boat, that arc with two penguins. And as that door closing slowly? And he's just looking at all the motherfuckers. that didn't listen to him. Oh, man. I don't know if I felt like a king. He absolutely did.

He brought his family on though, right? Um, I don't fucking remember. I can't believe he's the only one with a boat. That's another thing about that story. He didn't have a boat. Don't disrespect him. He had an arc. But I can't believe he was the only one with a boat.

Like, there hasn't been someone else with a boat that just was happened to be like canoeing that day. And then the water came when he was like, oh, it's lit. And then he survived. You know the word y'iots? derives from the word arc. Keep going. Yeah, arc was, I forgot what language it was, but arc is a word that it's actually pronounced yark.

And by the time it got to fucking America, people didn't know how to pronounce yark. So they said yacht. Are you making this shit up, bro? It's brilliant idiots, baby. That's what we do. It's brilliant. It's brilliant.

It's brilliant. It's pretty idiot's baby. You never said who you never said who your, positively idiotic was. Oh, I gave it to Trump. One was Trump for the fucking sending the shit to Florida. But also a pastor Rodney Howard Brown. He's also a pastor in Florida, man.

Like, I believe in God so much, but I also believe that faith without works is dead. Right. So even though you can have all of faith in God in the world, you have to work to actually submit your will to God and do what it is. God wants you to do. I don't believe in people who, like,

constantly sin every single day. and do things that they know they're not supposed to be doing every single day, but think they can just go to God and pray for repentance. God is going to cover me. I just think that's some bullshit. And that's what Rodney Brown essentially did because Rodney Brown was still having church service. And he claimed that the power of prayer would make the coronavirus go away. Right.

And he claims he did the same thing with the Zika outbreak. And he actually got arrested for unlawful assembly and violation of public. health emergency rules. And I think that was the right call. Because he's a fucking idiot. You know what I'm saying? You can't bring thousands of people into a church at a time like this and then use God to say that it, to question them and say, hey, if you don't have, if you have faith,

you won't catch this disease. Question. Yes. Why do religious people, you know how they're like, God will send you messages, right? Yeah. Why do religious people seem to be so skeptical when God sends messages through the government? Right? Like they'll look at a Bush.

Because they don't believe in government. You know what I'm saying? Yeah, but like they'll look at a burning bush or some shit and they'll be like, ooh, that's a message. You know what I mean? Or like they'll see the, you know, Virgin Mary in like their rice and beans and be like, oh, that's a Virgin Mary. But when the government's like, yo, stay home or you're going to die.

And everybody else is going to die, they're like, that's definitely not a message. Why is that? because they don't believe in government number one and they don't think that the government officials are submitting their will to God. They think that the government officials are relying on their own understanding and their own power.

And I agree with you 100%. I believe in GOD, but I'm also going to listen to the CDC. Okay? And if the CDC tells me the social distance and the CDC tells me to stay the fuck home, I'm going to stay home. Yeah. It's just common sense.

Like that's why I say faith without works is dead. You have to work, you know, on protection. protecting yourself during this crazy time. It's the same way about, you wouldn't go raw in a woman if she told you she had herpes or HIV or AIDS. I mean, I wouldn't use a condom either. Really?

If a girl says she has a age. I mean, you wouldn't sleep with her at all. Yes. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You would avoid it. Unless, of course, you got herpes too. Are, you know, you've done your research to herpes and you know that you can like,

like, I guess fuck between outbreaks. You know what? I don't even really believe that. What? You don't believe in herpes? No, I believe in herpes. But like the fuck between outbreaks thing, it just seems like something a guy would make up

so he could still get pussy while he had herpes. The moral of the story is you're not going to change. We're not risking it. Like, if you got herpes, you got herpes, you know? And I don't think that that's that big a deal. Herpes? No, like, not risking it. No, me neither.

Like, think about it. We're not going outside right now so we don't get coronavirus. And most of us ain't going to die from coronavirus, right? It's going to be two weeks where it sucks. Herpes, you have for the rest of your life. Herpes is way more devastating than coronavirus. Really? Yeah, you don't think so in terms of like your sexual life?

Herpes has, I don't think herpes has a mortality rate though. Like there's nobody, I've never heard anybody dying from herpes. I mean, your dick dies. Nah. Because then who are you going to fuck? Just a bunch of other people who got herpes? Yes. Honestly, they might be the best at fucking.

Yes, they got herpes. First of all, you act like you don't have a lot to choose from. You know, you might. Yo, your sex life might go through the roof once you get herpes, bro. One in three, bro. And you could rock because it's like, we already got herpes. Like, what are we worried about? What's that dating site where you can remain anonymous?

We can go on there with a fenceda. Oh, grinder? I don't know what the fuck. I don't know which one it is. But it's one of those dating sites where you can go on and the public doesn't know what's you. Uh-huh. But the people you talk to know is you. So, yo, you create a site like that, a forum like that for herpes.

Yeah. And motherfucking, you prosper out here. One and three people got herpes, bro. I'm going to be honest with you. After this coronavirus shit is over and I don't have herpes. Yeah. But I just feel like you're going to get it. We need to try to eradicate the stigma around herpes.

The same way I'm you doing my part to eradicate the stigma around mental health in the black community, somebody needs to do their part to eradicate the stigma around her. Yo, let me tell you something. And I'm with you in this. But the only reason. why we're okay with this is because we're not out there in the streets fucking girls

that might have herpes. We're faithful. So we're doing the exact same thing that those celebs, we have a mansion full of no herpes at home to hang out of it. Right?

So we're doing the same thing those celebs on a yacht are doing right now. We're like, yo, herpes ain't that bad. Don't worry. Go out there. No stigma.

Because we're not trying to fuck nobody got herpes. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Right? I get it. I get it. Imagine you were out there in those streets still, bro,

and you could bring that herpes back to your wife. Yeah, I think we, I think when it comes to STDs, though, we put herpes on too high a level just because it stays with you forever. Yes. You know what I mean? So where do you see herpes? Where do you see herpes? If a girl's like, yo, I got herpes, but it's just one, you could put a little circle bandaid on it.

Would you still fuck? Well, I mean, people get it on their lip. That's not herpes. Yes, it is. It's type eight. It's called herpes, but it's not. Like, that's manslaughter for herpes. Really?

Yeah. You know what I mean? It's not the same punishment. Really? Yeah. Like, you didn't really mean it. By the way,

if you kiss me when you see that goddamn colds on my mouth. That's on you? That's on you, bro. Yeah. That's on you. You had a choice.

If you're growing out your pussy hair to cover your fucking herpes, that's different. You're disguising it. You're not giving me a choice. Can beards cover cold sauce? No, I mean, if you're growing out your pussy hair,

but beards might be able to. No, I'm just thinking about that. Can beards cover cord sauce? Cold sores? Maybe. You never seen James Hardin with a cold sole, bro. Say what? You never seen James Hardin with a cold soul.

Oh my God. And I know all the pussy he's gotten in his life. He's encountered a herpet too. Oh, dude, he loves the strip club. Yeah. Oh. Interesting. Do you think people are still hitting the strip club now during Corona?

Nah. Well, you know what? Script clubs in certain areas are still open, but nah, script clubs are done. Crip clubs are not essential. Them shit is pretty much closed most, most everywhere. How does it feel like, knowing your job isn't essential.

Don't you like really put things in perspective? I thought about that. I did think about that. A lot of people who, well, first of all, I'm happy that I have an essential job, but I did think about people

who probably thought their work was really, really important. Like who? I was just thinking about this shit the other day, man. There was someplace that was closed. Oh, fucking barbers and fucking people that run

beauty salons, yo. Yeah, man. How the fuck is that not a sense? He's getting rough out there, bro. God damn. And by the way, those are the people who could actually protect themselves the best, right? Because think about it, if I'm a barber,

I go wash my hands, hot water, I put on the gloves, I put on a fucking mask. I should be able to cut some hair, right? Yeah, but then you'd be in contact with so many people and one of them is going to have corona, be fucked up. I mean, there's certain people that still have the barber come to the crib. Duval's looking lined up throughout this quarantine. He is?

Yeah, he has the barber come to the crib. I called mine. I'm not going to lie. I said, yo, you need to come back. He's in North Carolina, but I was like, bro, you need to come, dude. We need to stop fucking around. I don't want to do that because I don't want to put nobody at risk.

And plus my barber, salute to my guy, Ty. He lives in, like, the T-neck Inglewood area. And that's a pretty, that's a little hotspot from what I saw in the goddamn news. That's a red zone. Yeah, that's a red zone. But it's cool, listen, I like it. I think one of the most positively brilliant things, you know, that's happening right now is like people are really getting to see the real them.

You know what I'm saying? We getting to see our real selves. It's not an illusion. You know what I mean? You look at God damn Puffy. Puffy did a fucking IG story the other day. That's Puff Granddaddy, bro. Like that, like, I'm talking about full head of white hair almost, full white beard.

Yeah. I'm like, wow. Like, even Kevin Hart, before Kevin Hart had his barber come over and put the Beijing on his shit, same exact thing. You know what I mean? And I appreciate that. Like me, I know for a fact, my shit looked like Kevin Durant. Let me see your shit. Nah, not.

Come on, let's see it, bro. Expose it for all the brilliant idiot listeners right here. Let's see how crazy. It looks fine. Your forehead looks okay. Forehead looks amazing. But my hairline is social distancing from my forehead. So my hairline starts like right in the middle of my shit.

Like my hair line acts like my fucking forehead got Corona for real. And like they have no choice. Come on, just take it off. Let's see. Nah. Real quick, just for a second. Oh, come on. What are you worried about?

You can't even see. Can you see? If you just take the whole thing off. I'll never tease Kevin Durant ever again, bro. Why? You really feel it right now? No, I will tease Kevin Durant. I'm gonna tell you why.

My shit was bald for a mad long. Yeah. So the way my shit grows in is wow. It's my favorite unit of time is a mad long. Huh? Kevin Durant has hair. All Kevin Durant got to do is brush his shit. My shit look like this because I don't have no fucking brushes in the house.

You have three girls. You don't have a single brush? No, I'm talking about the, the OG wooden, the wooden joint. You know what I'm saying? Yes. Not a brush like that. Women use.

And my wife got the wooden brushes, but them shit too fucking hard. I need soft bristles, B. I told my wife ordered me a soft bristle brush the other day and she going to look at me and say, you're just happy you got some fucking hair on your head. I need to see it, dude.

Just take your fucking hoodie off, man. You're Charlemagne to God, bro. Nah, bro. Most dangerous morning show in the world. No, I'm not ready to live. Life dangerously right now. Take that hood off, okay? Expose it.

Nah, because I don't want to do, I don't want to do herpes me on the internet. What you mean? You think that they're going to make fun of you on the internet? It'll be that meme that lives forever. You can never get away from it. Are you? You know what I'm saying?

You give them one little shot thinking it's just us. You know what I'm saying? And our brilliant idiots try. And next thing you know, 10 years from now, I'm still on the internet looking like that. I don't want to see it, dude. I don't want to do that myself. How does it look, though?

It looks like Kevin Durant with no fucking hairline, bro. It looks like Kevin Durant receding like a motherfucker. Don't give me a person. Give me an object. Like, does it look like someone dipped your head in sprinkles? You ever seen a worn tennis ball? You ever like walk to a tennis court? Like, if you walk to a tennis court,

like, you know how you see like pieces of gum just chewed up in corners and shit? Like, walk through a tennis court. You'll see an old tennis ball somewhere on that fucking court. That's how my shit looked. It's patchy. It's not patchy, it's just worn. It's worn? It looks worn.

I got to see a little bit, dude. Just show a little bit. Bro, come on, it's just a little bit. Just show a little bit. Let's see. Let's see. Here it is. Hold on.

I'm looking on the big TV. Okay, you got the side. I mean, I think you got hair, bro. Let's just see it. I didn't say I didn't have hair. I'm just saying it looks like Kevin Durant. I got Corona Curl. Let's pull off the front.

Let's just pull a- Corona curls. I got Corona curls. Look. Come on. Maybe it's actually better than you realize. Maybe you have body dysmorphia.

Like, you know those girls that they think that they're fat but they're really skinny? Maybe you actually have a full head of hair. Whatever works for Lizzo is not going to work for me, buddy. You're not going to gas me up. Yo, bro, bro.

Listen. Nope. Charlotte, man. I just took a look. I think you're 100% that bitch, bro. Like, I think you really, listen, I think you 100% that bitch, bro. Like, you might have a full-headed hair and you don't know about it. You know what, no, I was getting those PRP treatment from Dr. Natasha Sandh.

But see, the thing was, I would never let my hair grow. Okay. To actually see if it was working. And now it's growing. I'm not going to lie, I had a couple ball spots right here in them shit. That. Eh? I think you got to show us just for a fraction of a second

just so we could see the growth, man, so we could be on this journey with you because I remember you being completely bald. Now the hair is starting to grow in, right? Everything's starting to fill in. The high tide is coming. The return, the resurrection, if you will. We're coming up on Easter.

The resurrection of Charlemagne, the God's hairline. I got you on Easter. Post-Corps. Say what? The week of Easter, I'm going to show you the curl. Oh, shit. The man knows how to make two weeks of content. That's what I'm talking about.

He's a professional. The week of Easter, the week of Easter, my handline shall rise. Really? Yes. All right. But no barber, no barber, nothing. No barber. I'm going to give it to you just like this, baby.

Fresh out the grave. Fresh out the grave after seven days, all right? I'm going to give it to you, baby. Bring back that thriller. How long was Jesus in the grave? I forgot. Three days. Three days.

Fresh after three days. Why three? These are the questions I have. Why three? I mean, if God could have risen them right away. Yeah, you gotta build a little anticipation. You think? You got to build a little anticipation.

Come on, that's a big deal. Redirection of Christ, come on. I'm not just going to pop back up to next day. You want to appreciate it. So you're saying God wasn't into like binging? Nah. He wanted you to wait a little for next episode. Appointment viewing, baby.

He's like, you're like, you're like, Y'all gonna come every Sunday and I'm gonna surprise you with a midweek drop. God is good at that, bro. It's the same thing with Noah. Like, nah, you're not just gonna build this arc of me.

I'm gonna let you build this arc from scratch. We're gonna give the, we're gonna get the real buildup. So when you shit on these people, you're gonna appreciate. God don't give you what you want. He gives you what you need. He gives you what you need.

And what we need is that validation of shitting on people sometime. God damn it. And that's what Jesus did too because Jesus told you I was coming back. Mm. I told you,

I told you to my, God is a mighty mighty God. Oh, you don't believe? Okay, watch this. And that's what they did. They killed Jesus and Jesus had to show him. He had told you I wasn't playing. Now you got to watch your back forever. Imagine that. Imagine you kill me. And I tell you that my father is God. And when you kill me, I'm coming back for that ass, right? And then you do kill me. Then I return after three days. Don't even seek revenge. Now you got to watch your back forever. Do you think that there were a few people that were looking at Jesus after he came back and they were like,

well, if your dad's God, like he couldn't fill in your hands? Whoa. Do you think that there was a little skepticism? Okay. All right. I want to salute everybody. Was that too crazy? I want to salute the positively brilliant people who have been using their power.

Okay, go. Fight this fight this week. Okay. Jay-Z and Rihanna, they combined and gave $2 million. for corner buyers relief. Huh? I said it's amazing.

Yeah, salute to them. Salute to Quest Love. He's giving money to this food bank. The food bank is COVID-19, NYC, hub. Okay. I donated some money to them because that's another thing I was sitting around doing right. I was like, you know, a lot of times

when we think about being productive, we think about us. Yes. What can I be doing? 100%. To be productive. My mind always, says, how can I be a blessing to other people?

Yes. To me, that's a part of being productive as well. You know what I'm saying? So that's why everything that I'm doing in my life moving forward, or even everything that I have going now is helping to empower other people. But when I was sitting around the other day, I was like, you know what? Let me look into some of these charities and see who I can throw a little change to. Yeah, let's share with the people.

What are you thinking? What is, uh, I, I, yesterday, literally yesterday, um, and I, I should have did this a couple of weeks ago, but I forgot about it. But when we had Andrew Yang on, he was talking about his program, the moving forward with humanity, I believe it's called. Yeah, that's what it's called. Moving forward with humanity. And they're a coronavirus relief fund. And they actually give, you know, money to businesses that are shutting down, people that need it.

So I donated five grand to them. And the only reason I'm saying the number is because I actually said it. on the air with Andrew Yang. So I did that yesterday. And I donated money to the Questlove's food bake organization yesterday as well. Right. Because Quest Love's organization is providing, I don't know if that's his organization, but the company he's promoting is providing lunch for kids that aren't in school.

And, you know, that's really like one of their only meals of the day. Right. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, I think it's great. I think it's great to like find the right thing to important, to help. There's a, there's a company that I was talking to a couple

guys that I wanted to kind of support what they're doing. And they're basically, if the hashtag is in my scrubs, they have a GoFundMe account as well. You can find it in my scrubs as well. And what they've basically done is, when I was talking to that doctor, a lot of the hospitals are taking on

more staff, right? And some of the hospitals just aren't feeding them appropriately. They don't have the ability to feed them appropriately. Some of these hospitals aren't paying the overtime that these workers deserve. And we thought it was really important. Well, this company thought it was really important. They asked me if I could talk about it on a different podcast, et cetera. And to make sure that

these health workers are getting good meals and they're eating as they're doing this is one thing that they shouldn't have to suffer through. So what they did is they partnered with like local delivery service options. Like right now they're doing a thing with DoorDash. But currently they're doing something with something serve, green serve. I'll get the exact one. But basically the idea is you work with local restaurants that are struggling. You get them. You raise money. We get them. All the proceeds or all the money, everything comes in, goes into these local restaurants, buys meals, and they're delivered to these local hospitals that are helping people. And it started in New York and New Jersey and they want to branch out to San Francisco, possibly other cities in the

country, maybe other countries as well. But the whole idea is like, make sure you can get them food and not only them, they're looking at ways that they can get the families of the healthcare workers food as well. Because as these healthcare workers are at their job, 12, 14 hours a day, right? There's nobody for them to maybe feed their family. They can't go grocery shopping. They're things that create tons of difficulty at home. So we're trying to ease that a little bit. So you can check that out, man. Again, the hashtag is, in my scrubs and you can donate money there. And these are legit guys, man, and they're trying to do whatever they can to help out. And they're like the worst is yet to come. It's going to get bad the next couple weeks because I think middle

America it's about to hit. Yeah, it's going to hit them red stage, man. I don't know what I was talking to Chris about that this week. I don't know. Yes, salute to that website and go to COVID. I want to give the website for Quest Love's Joint too. It's, um, uh, COVID-19 food hub NYC and Andrew Yang is moving forward with humanity.com. But now I absolutely agree with you. I do think it's going to get worse. The only reason I don't think it's going to hit. the rural area is crazy, it's because people are so spread out there. Right.

Not so dense like a New York City, you know what I'm saying? Even when they talk about the spread in Louisiana, you know, we forget Mardi Gras was in Louisiana. You know what I'm saying? So Mardi Gras was from like, I think January 6th to February 25th, and I saw them giving the mayor a lot of shit

saying that, you should have canceled it. I think it's the mayor of New Orleans. And she was like, how would I know to cancel it? And that's the truth. Back then, January, January 6th. I was still on vacation on January 6th. I didn't get back in the States until January 9th. Yeah.

You understand what I'm saying? Yeah. So if you was in New Orleans and you was at Mardi Gras from January 6th to February 25th, you was living your life like it was golden. You know what I'm saying? You didn't think that there was a goddamn invisible enemy out there fucking us up. Yeah. So I don't know if it'll necessarily run through rural areas the way it's doing a place like New York.

Yeah, it'd be difficult because... Yeah, there's less social interaction. There is less social interaction, but... I think Wyoming got one case. Yeah, but I went to Wyoming. Wyoming feels like, I don't know. New York now. Like, there's just no, it's hard to see people.

That's why everybody's so friendly when they see someone else, because they're like, finally, you know, you are isolated out there. And in any situation where you're isolated, it's going to be hard for shit to transfer. It's tricky, man. It's tricky. What do you think, have you given any thought to,

and maybe this is our deep dive, have you given a thought to life after Corona, how this is going to change things? how this is going to change the way we interact, the way we live. Like, what are the greater repercussions of this beyond what we're experiencing now? Taylor hit the fucking drop. This is the deep dive. Yeah.

This is all I've been giving thought to. Life is not going back to normal because I believe shows that normal was an illusion. I don't believe normal. I don't believe what people call America, what people say is normal in America. I don't think America was ever normal because Right. And Van was saying this and it made a lot of sense. You know, they talk about how strong the economy was,

but it took two weeks to bring the American economy to his knees. Right. We always knew that the health care system was shitty, but a lot of times we think about the health care system being shitty in regards to people not having health care. But no, America's actual health care system is fucked up. Yeah. It's not built for a pandemic.

It's not built for something devastating to happen on a large scale. Like right now, America got his pants all the way down. What if a fucking terrorist attack happens right now? Yeah. What if it's a major earthquake in California? You know what I'm saying? Like, what if it's just some crazy natural disaster that, you know, none of us can stop? What if that happens right fucking now?

Bro, America would be, we're already on his knees. That's like a gunshot to the. head. So I don't think that we can, I think moving forward after this, we can never go back to what we think is normal because how would a terrorist attack happen now? Normal doesn't work, normal doesn't work for everybody. Yeah. You know what I'm saying? Like there's too much of a gap between the halves and the have knots. And then even when it comes to the halves, it's this illusion to the healthcare system, right? Because you could be the richest person in the world. If the hospitals are fool. The hospital's a fool, baby.

Yeah. You know what I'm saying? You can be the richest person in the world. If the doctors are stretched thin, the doctors are stretched thin. Yeah. Even if you got the money for the surgery, if you can't pay to get it, you know, whatever that surgery may be, what does it matter? Yeah. So it's just like, I just don't see how we ever go back to the way

things were after this. Yeah, things always change. You know, I think that you're going to see things always change. I agree with Van and that like things weren't normal. Like we were living in luxury. We were living a weird experience that was, you know, we just got comfortable with.

We got entitled to. And I think this is like a, this is a slap in the face of reality, which is like, this is the real world. Shit happens in the real world. The real world isn't you can just start a business and they'll work out. The real world isn't like, and you know, not to knock envy, but like the real world isn't, hey, life is so good. You just buy a house and then you flip it. And if you can't pay for it, you pay for it.

Like, that's not the real world, right? Like, the real world isn't guaranteeing that the economy is so good that you cannot fail. That's not the real world. The real world is every once in a while, an attack happens. Every once in a while, there's a pandemic. There's disease. That's the real world, right? And I think that people start operating a little differently afterwards.

I think that people... I think we have to. I think... You got to save money. Like, there are so many people that, for the first time in their entire life, right now, they're going, shit. I can't live week to week. This can happen again.

Let me tell you some. I thank God I don't have no vices, bro. I thank God that I've never been the guy that would go out there and fucking Lisa fucking Phantom. I thank God that I'm not the guy that owes a fucking jeweler. I thank God that I don't care about designer

taste and all that shit. Best thing that ever happened to me was I got money at a much older age. Right. You know what I'm saying? And plus I never had those expensive tastes anyway. That's not my style. I never got down like that.

So people laughing me. I've always been the type of person. I like to see my money like I like my erections. I like to just see them grow, grow, grow, grow, grow, grow, grow, grow, grow, grow, right? So it's like even when I was a kid and I used to be stacking money, I would just want to see that not get bigger, bigger, bigger, bigger, bigger, bigger. Yeah, you want to look at it. And that's how I think my, I look at my bank account.

I just like to see them zero, zero, zero, zero, zero. My motherfuckers talk about saving for a rainy day. Yeah. Shit. I'm the motherfucker that saves for a goddamn rainy day, nigga. I know the arc. I know the arc is going to be needed at some point. For real, man.

It is a tricky thing. It's a very tricky thing because people, I guess, just assumes nothing bad could happen. Do you think that's what it was? American arrogance, bro. We are so fucking arrogant. We're so fucking arrogant. We're so spoiled. We look at what happens in third world countries.

We even say that shit. Think about it. We would go certain places. be like, what is this a fucking third world country? You know what I mean? Like you would say that about certain places in America. That's how spoiled we fucking are. We see the hood.

We see the ghetto. I've heard people say that. They see the hood. They see the ghetto. They're like, these people are living like they in third world countries. No, we're living like we're in fucking America.

Yeah. That's how it is for a majority of Americans. You know what's funny? Once there's a global pandemic, right, all the sudden the pull yourself up by your bootstraps mentality goes out the window. You don't know. Is that like all these like right wing conservative like libertarian guys like all these guys who are like, hey man, you just got to pull yourself up by the bootstrap. All of them are like government, where are our masks?

Government, where's our check? Government. Give us the vaccine. It's like, why don't you pull that vaccine up by the bootstrap? Why don't you pull some masks up by the bootstrap? That's right. It's the second you struggle, you won't help. But you can't look at something.

When you have tons of money, when you have tons of shit, you can't. you can't look at people who needs, or most people can't look at people who need things and go, man, maybe they need my help. Yes. Right? It's like,

we want to live this, we want to live this weird life where we've accomplished everything ourselves. It's so hard for people to share their accomplishments, right? The whole pull yourself up by your bootstrap mentality is kind of bullshit. I like, I like the way of living like that,

because I think you get the most out of yourself, but it's bullshit to go that you got here all by yourself. I like the idea of it, right? The idea of it is basically saying. It inspires behavior. It inspires activity. But anybody successful, if they're being honest with their self, had a lot of help on the way.

A lot of help. Initially, you do have to, quote, unquote, pull yourself by the boot scraps. But once you do that, it's the same thing. Like Chris Rock used to talk about, if you're on the side of the road sitting in your car and the car's broken down, people will keep passing you by. when you get out and you start pushing the car, then people come to help. But I would, it's the same mentality. Like, if I, if I pull myself by the bootstraps and I get the work,

somebody eventually is going to come along and help me with this work. Yeah. But in that situation, nobody goes, well, how the fuck you even get a car? That's very true. You know what I'm saying? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Did your uncle let you get the car, right? Did your parents help you with it?

People are always going to help you along the way. So it's just a very, like, selfish and arrogant mentality that has. that like you got all your success by yourself. Nobody fucking helped you. So you look at other people like, hey, why can't you do the thing I did? It's like, yeah, I've, I did certain things,

quote, quote, by myself in my career. But like, my parents have always been supportive of me. My friends have been supportive of me. I hired incredibly talented people who helped. Like, you know, I do a podcast with a guy with incredible reach that gave me the ability to put my shit in front of people. But you're missing one key point to all. Everything you're saying, Andrew,

is perfectly true. Right. You're missing one key point, though. you at some point in your life decided to apply all that shit your parents had taught you, all that shit those mentors had taught you and said, you know what?

I know what I want to do. I'm going to go do it and you actively pursued it. Yes. Which was stand up. I think when it comes to that initial, you can have all the mentors in the world, you can have parents, everybody telling you what to do,

how to do it. But you eventually got to pull yourself up by your own bootstraps and at least start. And then once you start, People will come along, see what you're doing, and help you the rest of the way. You're right, you're right.

You have to start it. You have to start it, but other people will help. Absolutely. Other people will help. And you don't even have to ask them most of the time. So I guess Chris's analogy is the best in that way, because if you are starting it and you are doing good work, other people will help you.

But people are going to fucking help you, man. And I'm tired of these people acting like nobody helped them. People invested in your fucking company, all these bootstrap guys. People gave you money. People gave you opportunity. People gave you their platforms. Like, get the fuck out of here.

I think we as Americans, we, well, definitely Americans. Not even, I'm about to say humans, but no. The problem is we as Americans expect certain entities to help us because that's what they promise us in the Constitution. You know what I'm saying? Like government is supposed to be there for the less fortunate. Government is supposed to be there for the poor and disenfranchised. Government is supposed to give you a hand up,

give you a helping hand. I don't think it ever was in the initiation of the country. I think everybody was... They promised us debt. What they promise up. I think they just promised basic liberties. They're like, hey, you got the right to be free and then do whatever the fuck you want to do.

Think about that. You're speaking from a real place of privilege, right? And I'm not even talking about race. I'm talking about just because of, you know, your financial status. Right. Certain civil liberties that are allowed to you aren't allowed to somebody else.

I'm talking about basic needs. Right. Basic necessities. Think about you got, yo, bro, we got homeless people in America. We got people in America who don't eat.

Yes. You know what I'm saying? Who can't get clean water. Yeah. Those are just, I'm talking about the, those are the bare minimum basic necessities. You know what that is, bro?

That's the cost of extremes. It's like anything, if you have an extreme of one thing, you'll have the extreme of the other, right? Like, you ever watch the Matrix? Like, there's no Neo without Agent Smith. Right? The more powerful,

Neo got the more powerful Agent Smith got. That whole yin and the yang thing is true, right? So it's like that's what America is. We take the cost of extreme wealth and extreme success as extreme poverty. Because we got some extreme poverty here too. We got a lot of homeless motherfuckers. You know? And I know it's American poverty and people would be like, well, you don't know poverty in India.

Sure, sure, sure, sure, sure. I get that. Go to skid row in L.A. They're living, but they got tense at least. Yeah, you're right. They got tense. Who's handing on all this camping here? Think about that.

They got tints at least. Yeah. Woof. Yeah. So that tick, I'm saying all that to say that tent to somebody is a mansion, bro. Yeah.

You know what I'm saying? You take that tent to some other country that. They would love to have that tit. Yeah. To protect them from the elements. You know, what kind of things do you think change? Like, do you think the way that we, oh, by the way, we do have an ad?

We do have an ad that we have to read? But do you think that, do you think that things change in a way that we interact with each other. Like right now when I've seen people, right, like socializing. My girl and I were running today. As we're running,

this guy and his girl were walking down the street. As we run by, this guy shields his girl from me and my girl as if we're carrying the corona. And I get it because he doesn't want his girl

to get corona or he doesn't want to get it. But it's a weird way to socially interact with people and it creates an isolated culture. Right? Imagine imagine me jogging as a black man in a hoodie. Son. Yo, the crazy part, true story.

Jogging, hoodie on. If I see a white woman in front of me jogging, I'm either going, I can't speed up to pass her. Yeah, yeah. Because that might scare the fuck out of her. You know what I'm saying? So I either got to stay. I got a social distance.

I'm talking about way before Corona. I got a social distance way far back. Yeah. I just go the other way. You know what you got to do? You got to start yelling help before she can. So as you're coming up behind her, you got to be like, help. And then she turns out like, what's going on?

You're like, help, help. You pass her and then you're good. But you got to confuse her before she could yell help. You'd be like, help, help, what's that meat eaters? I'm sure she's vegan because she's a white woman. So white women. Yo, all this vegan shit about to go out the window, bro. All this shit.

Say again? People need protein right now. All the woke shit is quiet. You ever notice that now? Woke shit is real quiet. Like women got no problem being at home cooking. Women got no problem talking about the man that they love and appreciate. All the woke shit's gone, huh?

You know why I'm happy everybody's quiet? Because we should be at a time like this. You talk about what's going to change after this. Right now is not a time for anybody to be heard. And what I mean by that is this. Yeah. I have leaned into the uncertainty of it all. I've submitted my will to God like I always do.

To me, this is something that's bigger than man. This is bigger than government. This is a higher power operating like we can't even imagine, right? Right. So I forgot what the fuck I was going to say. People don't care. Like, people need to not speak. People need to be silent.

Oh, yes, yes, yes, yes, right? So we're always getting on our knees. God shut you up, bro. Asking God. Cut that shit out, Doc. God said, cut that shit out, bro. Stop using my name for your bullshit. But no, we're always getting on our knees

praying to God asking for God to hear us, hear us, hear us, right? So imagine everybody on their knees right now praying, telling God all the bad things that are happening. Oh, I lost my job and this and that and this and that. Bro, God knows. God is omnipresent, bro. He's omnipresent.

What's the word? I don't know. After his prime, bro. Yeah, he's an omnipose. What's the word, man? You know the fucking word, man. He's omnipresent. But it's another word.

I'm nipotent. Huh? I'm nippleton. You're impotent. What did you say? What did you say, shows? Omnipotent. I don't, yeah, that word.

Basically, he's all knowing. Yeah. All right. Yeah. So he knows what the problems are already. He knows you lost your job. It's about you, bro. It's about you.

This is about you listening. Yo, that's true. God never heard a single prayer and was like, word? He knows. You ain't surprised in him? Word, there was a earthquake today? Holy shit.

For real? I got to address that earthquake, bro. It's just coronavirus? Really? Oh, I don't know. God is like, I don't have CNN. So why are we praying if he knows already that shit is so dumb? Yo, listen, God's sitting there like, let me tell you something.

Not only do I have CNN, MSNBC, and Fox News, I know what those people are going to say before they get on there and say it. This is all written, baby. I wrote it. You're going to insult me. You're going to get on your knees. and pray to me and tell me what's going on. Like, I ain't in the know.

I'm aware. Andrew, think about it. As you get older, when these motherfuckers is telling you some shit that you don't know, you get a little insulted, don't you? Like, nigga, I'm hip. These motherfucking streets? Okay? I know what's going on.

Don't insult me like that. Ew. I know it's a little baby and the baby. Right? Imagine how God feels when you're telling him things that he already know. God wants you to shut. So we want you to shut the fuck up and listen. Wow, we're treating him like he fell off.

Word up, you treat, like he's wearing baggy jeans. He got his hat like this. Like, come on God, should change out here, Doc. Treating God like he fell off. Oh, man. You treating God like he's not the hottest in the goddamn streets. You're treating God like he not the goat. You're treating God like he don't know when he's the architect of all ass, all this shit.

Don't insult him like that. Bro, it's literally like going into a restaurant or going into a flyer. place and talking to the owner of the place like he's the help. The owner would be like, yeah, I know what this is. I bought it. I built it. This is mine. God wants you to listen right now.

I'm not going to lie. I would still look at the owner like, all right, that's cool, but can I get some chicken tenders or something? Like, how are we going to figure this out? It's cool you own it, bro. You really got to know who you're talking to. Like, I remember I was on, when we was, this was last. fall, we was at the University of South Carolina

football game, I forgot who they were playing. Maybe it was Clemson. I don't remember who they were. Yeah, it was Clemson. And as we were going down the elevator, a security guard, when we stopped at this floor, the security guard was trying to make us come off. Right. To let like a coach or something ride. Right. This white woman, the elevator starts going

off on them. Like, we're not going no fucking way, yada, yada, yada, this and that. She never hit him with the, do you know who I am? Right. She just let him know, I'm not going. no fucking way. You tell coach such and such that this is whatever her name was, right? Yeah. Close the guy.

They told him, close the door. They closed the door. Come to find out that woman was some woman who donates like mad money to the school. It's like a building named after her family or some shit like that. I'm talking about hundreds of millions of dollars.

So she wasn't trying to hear it. But that guy didn't know who he was talking to. That's how we treat God, bro. Yeah. You got to know who the fucking talk to. So are you saying that we shouldn't even pray? No, we shouldn't. should pray, but we should pray for understanding.

We should pray and we should pray God. We should say God. We should say God, whatever it is you're trying to tell us in this present moment. Let me have the clarity to understand it. Yes. Let me have to, let me receive what it is you're trying to tell me. That's great. It's so many of us sitting around right now trying to tell God what it is. We want him to hear that we're not keeping our ears opening enough, open enough to listen to what it is. wants us to fucking hear.

That's great. Pray for understanding. Because if you pray for something, God's like, I know you want that. But if you pray for understanding, then maybe he can help you figure out why these things are happening. That is if you believe and subscribe to God.

Yeah, but I say it all the time. You can have a good plan, but it may not be God's plan for you. So, bro, you might be, you might be, you might be undervaluing yourself, meaning that you might be praying for something that's down here when what God really has for you

is all the way up here. Don't bid against yourself. So you're not, you're not praying high enough. You don't know. I'm just saying don't bid against yourself, King. Don't bid against yourself. Whatever it is you praying for God is like,

trust me, I know what I'm doing. I got this. I was looking at Bishop T.D. Jakes, right? Because I love Bishop T.D. Jakes. And I love to go to my spiritual advisors when stuff like this happens. This is how you know things are bad. Because I saw Donald Trump talking about

Franklin, yesterday, Billy Graham's son. Uh-huh. And he was like, I was on the phone with Franklin Graham for Madloom. Yeah. Okay? So, and he said something about Jesus.

So Trump really is feeling it right now. But Bishop TDJ said this is a great time to pray, plan, and prepare. Whatever is on the other side of this required complete global disruption. Many people are just waiting for normal to return, but disruptions come to liberate you from what was and to prepare you for what's next. There will be bankruptcies and billionaires born out of the future. this experience. There will be bitter divorces and couples who fall back in love resulting in stronger marriages that date back to these days. There will be churches that

close down and circus to the hardships this brings and others that initiate massive revival with innovative ideas because Corona came to town. There will be leaders who win the hearts of their people by fighting for their best interests and there will be others whose cowardice or narcissism will destroy the equilibrium of your organization. And he says a warm hand will reach out to the family or a bit of tongue will destroy it. Both will attribute to the virus. Which one will you be? Give that some thought as you look out the fence at a world shaking in unprecedented ways. That's Bishop T.D. Jakes. And I totally agree with him, man. I totally agree with him. You got to lean into the uncertainty of this whole situation.

I mean, that's all you got. And that's really all you got. This is totally out of your control. And I think from this point four, we should all live our life like that. You know what I'm saying? like things are not really in our control the way that we think they are. We're here about the grace of somebody. Yeah, you just control the things you can. That's what I've always tried to do in my life. Control the things you can.

And then not value the things you can't control. Say again? And you got to have the wisdom to know the difference. That's the serenity prayer. God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can and the wisdom to know the difference. I knew I was, I was on to something. Great deep dive.

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That's another thing too. I think the earth is healing itself. What you said just now about, what you say? You said something about the air is cleaner. I mean, everything is cleaner. You're seeing animals come back to certain areas that weren't there for a while. Like, I mean, it's, that's what happens, man.

When you remove people, the things around it are going to grow. But that's what happens when you remove any animal, right? Like, you remove cows from a field. The grass is going to grow higher, right? Like, animals affect their ecosystem. It's not like human beings are this, like, horrible disease that is on planet earth, just destroying it. I mean, some of us are.

No, we are. I would say the majority of human beings aren't destroying the earth. I would say the majority of human beings are just pretty poor, trying to survive. And then there's a select small group of human beings that are doing most of the destroying. That's what I assume. I mean, it goes back to what we were talking about last week, man. We're all, we're the parasites that are earth in a lot of ways

because we don't care about anybody else. We take fucking imminent, imminent domain over whatever it is. We fucking, wherever we plant our flag is where we plant our fucking flag. It's kind of dope. We don't care what was there before. We don't even give a fuck about what's going to be there after. We just knocked down these motherfucking trees. you know what I'm saying?

And then you wonder why Dears is running all through your backyard. Motherfucker, because they were here first. Simple as that. Were they? Were they? Were they? That's right. We really don't give a fuck about animals, man.

No. Like, you think those woods that get knocked down to make these houses and shit, shit wasn't living there? Nah, shit was living there. We just do not give a flying fuck about it, man. Not a flying fuck. Like we appropriate. The earth used to be, the earth used to be so.

different that it had saucequatch at one point, bro. It didn't have Sasquatch. It was a fucking 10 foot. You've been inside too long. You've been inside too long. God damn primate living in the woods. No, it wasn't. Because America used to be a much different place.

Then where are the skeletons for it? Why do we have skeletons of fucking dinosaurs? We don't have any Sasquatch cells skeletons? I don't know, bro. Maybe something fed off to, maybe, I mean, listen, maybe something fed off to Sasquoise bones. Maybe Sasquoise bones are tasty as fuck. That's possible.

Maybe. Maybe people wait on them shit to die because that meat is tasty as a motherfucker. So them animals being there dining. Let me ask you a question. People haven't fucked for like a month, right? Do you think once this quarantine is over, the dating sites explode and people want to like get with each other, start fucking and set it? Or do you think that all the independent women realize how lonely they've been during the quarantine? They're like, fuck it. I need a man.

Forget this whole life. You know, forget this. I need to, you know, sew my wild oats. I need to be back out there coupled up, buddied up because shit might happen like this. I think it's a little bit of both. I bet you the dating sites are booming now. I haven't done any research to it. But I bet you the dating sites are booming now because motherfuckers is at home lonely.

Yeah. So I bet you DMs is up like a motherfucker. Yeah. And more importantly, I bet you DM replies are up like a motherfucker. Oh, yeah. Stop back like you didn't see it. You got nothing to do. Then women don't have nothing.

to do and they shooting their shots back. But I bet you those dating sites are popping right, motherfucking now. What do you think happens? And this virtual shit, this might be the new shit, bro. I hope not. Because I like interaction.

I like human interaction. But this virtual shit like this, this might be really the new shit. Yeah. I mean, it's been the shit already. But I'm talking about like, this might be it. People might be satisfied with this level of communication.

I hope not, man. I hope not. either. I think we're community-based animals. We need to see each other. We need to, like, sing a song together. We just need to laugh together. We need to be around each other, man. That's why motherfuckers are risking it all to go to church. They just need to connect. We need to connect. Yeah, I said that, I mean, I said that, right? I'm like, my biggest fear about this whole shit is that we come out more distance from each other than ever before. Meaning, like, even after they say, okay, it's cool to hit the streets, we still not shaking hands. We still

staying six feet away from each other. We still not hugging. We still not going to large group settings. You know, instead now, being that we have the options like, yo, let's go on Zoom and do this meeting or let's go do that. You know what I mean? Like, I just hope that I just hope that this doesn't pull us farther apart because we already were far apart. When do we shake hands again?

You said what? When do we shake hands again? Six months, three months? 22. Fuck out of here, bro. Safely, 2022, bro. Fuck out of here. So you think we're not going to start dapping each other up until 2022.

Like these are the little things I'm a hugger, bro. I'm a hugger. Say again? I'm a hugger anyway. No, you're not. I've never been into the handshake. Handshake it too risky, bro. When have you been hugging people?

I'm a hugger. I hug all the time. Bro, if you were a hugger, those guys would have definitely connected on that, can I get a drop? Why? Because you would have been in for the hug. And then they would have caught you. But you came up from a social distancing.

He came up from behind me. He wanted that prom pick. See, that hug from behind is a little different, bro. By the way, that's another thing that we need the motherfucking talk about. When it comes to social distancing, for people who got anxiety and that's already paranoid, bro, I've been practicing social distancing. So in this time that we're in right now,

don't be walking up on me. My wife made me risk my life to go to the grocery store on Sunday, and I went to the motherfucking grocery store, and it was still people in there who want, wanted to take pictures. All white people, by the way, let the, let the record show. Yeah. White people don't give a fuck.

Right? About Corona? So I'm telling them to take, I'm telling them, okay, six feet away. Yeah. So it's probably a couple pictures floating around where I look like I'm photo bombing somebody. Yeah. But I'm not.

Yeah. Okay. That's just how I told him to take the picture. Got her show love to this woman named Veronica. I don't, I'm not sure how old Veronica was. She looked kind of younger. But she came to me respectfully. She stayed in front of the grocery cart.

And she said that she said that, She really appreciates me and appreciates everything I stand for. And she stands for what I stand for. On a normal day, I would have shaken her hand and asked her what exactly it is. She thinks I stand for because I would love to know what Veronica says she stands for as well that I stand for. So I would just like to know that on a regular day. I would have had that conversation. But it's very awkward, bro.

When you're dealing with anxiety and you had a time like this and you're in the grocery store and you're already thinking about all the worse that can happen and then all of these people want to come talk to you. But Veronica, if you're listening, I don't know if you listen to the podcast or the Breakfast Club, I appreciate you for appreciating me. Now, do you want to get into some shit people, shit you won't care about next week?

Yeah. Actually, I have a thought on shit, and I probably won't care about it next week, but I do have a thought. Okay. Where do you want to start then? Because I was going to start with Drake sharing the first photos of his son of Donis

on Instagram. over the weekend. That kid is violently white. But listen, here's the thing. I don't have an opinion on that kid. Well, you shouldn't. He's a kid. I think it's weird as fuck to watch all of these people. Like, when I woke up, I saw Drake's was trending and Adonis.

And I didn't, I forgot this kid's name. I don't know why I thought his name was. I thought the kid's name was my bed. And then it dawned to me like, oh yeah, push you did name the song Adonis or whatever the fuck it was. But it's like, I, um, I'm like, how do you have an opinion? on somebody's child. Yeah, you should.

Why do you give a fuck what somebody's child looks like? Like people are doing these deep think pieces like when this kid's older he's not going to be able to say the N word.

I'm like, is that really what's on your fucking mind? Well, like you're worried about whether or not this kid can sing his daddy's songs when he gets older? 100%.

No, no, that is a reasonable thing to ask. I mean, really? He's no way he can say, yeah, he looks like he should be in that Frozen movie. There's no way

that he could be able to say the N-word. You think he could say the N-word? Drake can barely say the N-word. No, he definitely can't say the N-word. If Drake was a bad rapper, you guys would be like, yo, chill. But the fact that he's nice, you're like, all right,

you've earned the N-word. But listen, I get all that, but my point is, who has time to come? Everyone now. Everyone has time now. You're right. We're bored.

We need anything. Dude, if this MJ documentary doesn't come out, we're going to fucking off ourselves. They literally, You saw them move up the MJ, Doc? I loved it. Wait, you saw it already? No, no, no, I'm saying I love that they moved it up.

Oh, thank God. Okay, here's something. And maybe I won't care about it next week. But, like, I was talking to Mark, my boy Mark, comedian, works with us. And we were talking about porn. And I went to look at this girl who's a porn star, right? And I'm scrolling through porn. I haven't looked at porn.

Good segue, because Drake's baby mom was a porn star. There we go. I haven't looked at porn for probably fucking years, okay? Outside of us watching old people porn. When is porn going to stop evolving? Because I don't might sound like a fucking old man right now, but it's already getting uncomfortable. Like everything was stepbrother.

Everything was stepmom. Everything is, it's just like getting closer and closer and closer to family, right? And like, it wasn't like that when I was a kid. I'm not saying porn wasn't wild when I was a kid. It was wild, but it wasn't as taboo, and things just get more and more taboo as time goes on. Just like basketball evolves, right? Just like when we were growing up, PowerFords couldn't shoot threes. Now, PowerFords shoot threes, right?

So it's like if this is what this generation of kids is watching and thinks is normal, what the fuck will my kids be watching and think are normal? Nah, I think you look. Nah, I think you dig it too deep, brother. Porn played into your wildest fantasies. I've never fantasized about fucking my kids. stepmom or my step-sister. You never had a hot step-mom

and step-sister. Even if I did, bro. Because if you just never had a hot, no, that's not true. If you think about it, imagine you were born into imagine you were married into a family like the Brady bunch. Or imagine you were married into the Kardashian thing. You know what I'm saying?

And now all of a sudden you got these hot step-sisters, a sister-in-law, whatever the fuck you call them. All right. So, you've been fantasizing about Kylie for a long time. I'm over it, by the way. Oh, you're over it?

Yeah. So who do you think is hot right now? My girlfriend. Okay. Well, imagine your girlfriend is your fucking step sister. Imagine at your age right now, Gray gets married.

I don't know how to fuck that would work. I don't know what the fuck. How would that work? I don't know how you get a step sister. I think your parents remarry. Okay. So at this age, your parents, your parents remarried, hypothetically, your sister, your step-sister is the girl that you think is

the hottest girl in the world right now, your girl. She's your step-sister. There's no blood involved, no nothing. You didn't grow up with her. Nothing. I understand why it's not immoral. I do understand that. I'm not debating whether or not you can fuck your step-sister.

Yes, I know you can fuck her, and that is what it is. What I am debating is how we, porn plays into the taboo, right? it plays into what is wrong. It plays into what you shouldn't do, right? It's like, naturally when you look at a girl, you're not like, I want five guys to come on her. You don't think that naturally, right? But eventually one guy comes on a girl and you're like,

I guess that's not enough. I've been desensitized to one guy. Let's add two. Let's add three. Let's add 500. Like, when does it stop? I'm really curious. When does porn stop, bro?

I think it's weird if you saw, if I saw a real mom fucking a son, I'd be like, okay, y'all going too far. son, they got pregnancy porn. That's not too far, bro. Some girls who's eight months pregnant. Some guys fantasize about pregnancy, boom, boom. Pregnancy pool, boom, is really good.

I'm not saying it's not good. I'm saying, three girls, I know. You want to see a fuck, three girls I know. You want to see a girl who's pregnant getting fucked by someone who's not the father of a kid? Well, that's just disrespectful. First of all, I would, if I'm the father, if I'm the father of the baby that's in that woman's stomach, somebody getting killed, bro. You coming on my fucking.

fetus? The fuck is wrong with you. Like that shit is disrespectful. I think women that do shit like that are disrespectful as fuck. I'm not going to laugh. But porn is disrespectful. You're not coming on a girl's face out of respect. But once again, that's playing into somebody's fantasies. Say again.

Like some, that's playing into people's fantasies. Some guys think that shit is sexy to come into a girl's face. Like all porn does is play on every weird, kinky, sexual desire you ever had. That's why you see a lot of S&M. Exactly. Exactly. But those desires, it takes steps to get there. Right. So it's like a culture that's never looked at porn, right? You just show two people making out and dry-humping, they're going to lose their shit. They're going to be like, fuck, that's porn. Amazing. It's on. It's popping. Right. But a culture like ours who's been inundated with porn, right? We've seen every different thing. Now you've got to add tentacles in just to get us off.

I'm not the same is at what point you stop. I haven't seen every different thing. I haven't seen every different. different thing. I just got into OPP. Old people porn. That's it. I just got into that one. Taylor showed us that shit a few weeks ago. And I haven't watched some in a while. But when I went down that old gray rabbit hole, I went down that old gray rabbit hole. God damn it. Yeah. Because I've never seen that shit. I was like, oh, shit, these old ladies be getting it in. They do get it in. And I'm talking about, oh, I'm talking about 70, 80 years old, wrinkled as fuck, like getting it in. And I was like, that was interesting to me. That's why you want people to take coronavirus seriously so all the people that you watch

and porn don't die? That's right. I'm always like older women though. I've never, I don't like elderly, wild elderly older women. But I like, I've always like older women. I think older women are beautiful. Like I think like Patty LaBelle is beautiful to me. Stephanie Mills is beautiful to me.

Angela Bassett is beautiful to me. Like these are beautiful 60 year old women, man. Yeah, I think incredibly gorgeous. beautiful and you don't want to watch them fuck. Excuse me? I think women can be beautiful and then you don't want to watch them fuck. But I'm just saying, like I don't know. Listen, to each his own.

I'm just saying you have to recognize at a certain point of time we're going to run out of things to put our dick in. Right? Like we're going to run out of sexual moves. Like you're putting two dicks in the fuck hole. Who the fuck are you? Joe Exotic, bro? You about to fuck a tiger? Yo, maybe, bro.

Do you mean you run out of holes? What's wrong with the? There's those this thing is running out of holes. I like the holes that I put my dick in. That's what I'm saying. The less that we're inundate ourselves with these like weird porn things, the more that we'll actually like what we have. It's like what we keep talking about.

It's like if you actually like who you are, you don't need all these other things to make you happy, then you're going to be happy in a time during, you know, global pandemic. You're going to happy when you're quarantined. If you don't need a buy fly shit to be happy, you'll be happy when you don't got shit. You and I got, you know what I'm saying?

You and I got a nice nest egg, right? Right? So we are prepared for something like this because we don't buy flashy shit all the fucking time. You never see me with jewelry or chains or nothing like that. I buy, spend some money on sneakers. That's it. Maybe, you know, the studio I spend some money on, but I save up for a rainy day because I don't know what could happen. Like, but, and, but also, I don't need the external shit to make me happy. I don't need people going, oh my God, you look so cool in that outfit. Now you're cool to me. I don't need that, right? So what if the same

thing applies to porn? What if, you know? I think porn, I get what you said. I think porn, um, I think you can get to the point where it takes too much to get you off. we're talking. You know what I'm saying? You don't want your brain to go there. Now we're talking. Yeah, but that could, that cut. I mean, if you fucking sitting around watching porn all day, jacking off

every fucking day, it probably does take you a little bit more to get hard. It does. It does. It takes a little bit more than the average bear. It does. Get a nice little woody. Yeah. So then that's, that's the issue. I get what you're saying. I just think that eventually we're going to have to have

a conversation and go, okay, we've done enough porn. Like, that's, that's enough. There's a limit to the porn. You just can't do weirdo shit. Son, it's all weirdo shit now. There's nothing out there that's not weirdo shit. Here's an interesting question. Okay. If you're into barely legal porn, like, you know, they, they put the fucking banner up, barely legal. They're marketing to people that want it to be illegal. Like, by clicking on barely legal, you're basically admitted. hey, I'd rather you be illegal, but this is the legal way to go about things. Yeah, that's a weird banner.

Right? It should just be like, it should just say hot 18 year old. That's it. Why are you marketing the illegal aspect of it? It's like clicking on that should make you feel weird. Yeah, they should just treat it like the Krispy Kreme Light. It should just be like hot and fresh 18 year olds. That's it.

Yeah, yeah, barely legal sounds wow. Son, that's where porn is going. Like, now, Porta's been there for a while, but that's what we're dealing with. If you click on barely illegal, you'd click on like... You're suspicious, bro. 16, 17, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, I get it. You're suspicious, bro. Barely legal, you're going for barely legal?

All right. I get what you saying. All right, shit you won't care about next week. You saw Tiger King. I did, yes. Did you like it? I loved it, man. I'm going to talk to Doc Antle later today on a podcast.

You think Joe Exotic, or Jeff was fucking one of them tigers? No, I don't think they were having sex with the title. Tigers. Really? Yeah, why? You think that they have sex Did you see when Kara was rubbing the tiger's balls?

Say again? Calm them down. Did you see when, what's her name? Kara? Carol? Carol? Did you see when Carol was

rubbing the tiger's balls to calm the tiger down? No, she did that? Yeah, there's a scene when she's rubbing the tiger's balls to calm the tiger down. I didn't see that at all, but I know that that girl is 100%

out of her fucking mind. You don't think it's weird to have that kind of relationship with animals, bro? Yeah, it's very weird to have it. relationship of animals. You're missing something inside and you need an animal that's going to love you unconditionally and not judge you for your past, you know, transgressions. I don't mind a dog or a cat,

but a whole animal people are weird, bro. If you are obsessed with animals, you got a little something missing in there, bro. It's, it's, I've never met a person obsessed with animals that I looked at and I was like, yep, they're okay, 100% okay. Nothing wrong with them. You know what else? I found disturbing. They said that it's more, it's more tight. It's more. It's more. in captivity than it is tigers in the wild. Yes. That's fucked up. Yeah.

Like, let the tigers go, bro. Why you got, why you fucking keeping tigers captive? Because society used to suck when tigers were just walking around. Where the fuck have you been with tigers are just walking around? Son, I haven't, but India was probably way worse when tigers were just walking around.

And now that all the tigers are going, people are like, oh, bad, I could take a nice little walk. Everybody was sheltered at home when the tigers were around. those tigers probably were never bothering no fucking body but tigers are probably just like cats you leave them alone they leave you alone bullshit cats out of nowhere just slap you in the face

well every now and then a tiger might do that but why are you in a cat's face bro we live in this amazing life where there's like no more animals around because we fucking killed them all but before that when animals were everywhere shit sucked it fucking sucks say again for people I don't believe that

you don't believe that why do we have coronavirus right now because Chinese people can't fucking leave animals alone. They got to sell them in every goddamn market. I'll tell you why I don't believe that because if that was the case, then why do white people go out of their fucking way to be around the animals? Because white people are bored and they need purpose and identity. So they become an animal person or a vegan or one of these other things. They don't have an identity to tap into. They just need something to do. I think Joe Exotic fucked that tiger, bro. Joe Exotic absolutely had his dick in the frosted flakes box. He would only fuck the tiger if it was straight. He would fuck Tony the tiger, just not

He'd fuck Tony the Tiger and he'd be like that dick is great. Listen, what if you make a cereal called Frosted Fucks with Joe Exotic on the front couple with his dick and Tony the Tiger? I think I can think of another word that you could name that cereal. Man, those frosted cigarettes in London are good, aren't they? Those fucking Those frosts and cigarette Those frosts and cigarettes

You guys have mercy, bro. Come on now. That was a laughing cough. That had nothing to do with goddamn Corona. Oh, you know what I wanted to go back to? I wanted to go back to Drake, right? Yeah. I got a theory about Drake.

Talk to me. It's just me talking, Charlamany God. I was thinking about him sharing in the first photos of his son Adonis. And I was like, why? You know what I'm saying? Because I mean, listen, I don't knock anybody who shows their kids on social media. I choose not to do it simply because, like, this world is fucking cruel.

You know what I mean? And I know what pisses me off. Yeah. And that would absolutely piss me off. So I'm not going to ever subject myself to that. But I see Drake, you know, doing a lot of little things. Like, you know, he'll leak music. He'll put out music videos here and there.

Like, he's got this dance song that, you know, he leaked to some dances. Some dances did a dance to it. I saw academics posted. Right. I'm thinking that either Drake, and I don't know what his label situation is right now, but I think he's either trying to start like a major bidding war, because I find it interesting that none of these songs

are coming out on screaming services. They're coming out on, like, YouTube. SoundCloud. SoundCloud. You know, even the record, that's the dance record. I don't know where that came from. I heard it was a leak. But I think he's doing that for one or two reasons.

Either he's starting a major. major, you know, bidding war for his services with one of these streaming services, whether it's Apple, whether it's Spotify, who knows who it'll be. And Drake will get top dollar from either one of them. Right.

Or, I wonder if Drake is questioning his place in the culture. Ooh. Talk to me about that. I wonder if he feels like his relevancy is slipping. which is not, by the way.

But I'm just saying he's at a place where he's been in this game for 10 years. He's not the young, you know, white, hot thing anymore. Right. He's just Drake. He's an entity unto himself, which is great. But I was thinking about when he came out at that Tyler the Creator show, and, you know, they kind of booed him. They did boo him.

Three, four years ago, that doesn't happen. I don't think for Drake at any. I think at Tyler's it would. Tyler's got such a specific, specific niche fan group that I think that they would. Maybe. It's possible. It's possible.

But I just, you know, I just wonder like, like, we're going to like what's not cool. Like, we're going to make what's not cool, cool.

And Drake is cool. So they reject whatever is mainstream cool. And that's where they find cool. So if golf is cool, they'll make, sorry, if golf is not cool, they'll be like,

we like golf now. Let's make golf outfits. I wonder if that bothered him in any way, though. I probably. I wonder if that bothered him and got into his head in any way, shape, or form. Because what I would tell Drake is, Drake, you're Drake.

Yeah. Meaning that you're established. You are right now one of the greatest hip-hop artists of all time. Right. Nobody can take that away from you. You want the greatest artists of all time. Nobody can take that away from you. Your place in the game, you know, from here on out,

depends on you. Like at this point to me, Drake is just playing for legacy. Right? Yeah. But he's doing things that I wonder if he is, I don't know, questioning his place in the game because it seems like he's trying to stay in the mix a little bit more than usual.

You know how Kendrick Lamar goes away. When Kendrick Lamar goes away, he goes away. Kendrick ain't tripping. Kendrick goes away. And then when he comes back, he changes the climate of everything. Drake has always been the type of artist that likes to be in your face.

That's why he always likes to, you know, be on features, always putting out music, whatever, whatever. But it's just little things now. Like even like, you know, jumping on Torrey Lane's, Instagram Live, you know, leaking the, putting out the pictures of his son. Yeah. Like, even the rap radar interview at the end of the year, which I thought was cool because it was him putting the cap on the decade. So that made a lot of sense for him to do an interview then, you know, but I don't know.

Did you see a photo shot image? They haven't really like hit hit. Yeah. You know, so I just wonder if he is questioning his place in. the game at all. Did you see him Photoshop the image of his girl and himself? What do you mean? So there's an image that he put out of him, his kid, and the baby mama, right? Yeah. And there's an image she put out of all three of them. Now, she changed their hair color. She made him have blonde hair and her have blonde hair and the kid obviously has blonde hair, right? Okay. And then he put

out the same picture just without the blonde hair. She was doing like a little joke about it, right? But if you look at the images, there's photoshopping done to Drake's baby mama. Like he makes her tits look bigger and her waist looks slimmer. And he makes himself look more muscular. Really? Yeah. Now, I don't know if he approves of every image before it goes out. Maybe he's got one of these guys that he sends something to and he makes the image look as good as it possibly can be.

But if you compare the images side by side, someone's photoshopping. either she's photoshopping. Say again? I didn't even pay that no attention. No, it was brought up. We were talking about it on Flagrant, on Flagrant too. Okay.

And we were just comparing him. It's like, what a weird thing, right? Like, why Photoshop muscles onto yourself? Like, I understand when girls do that filter shit, but like to make yourself look more small in a sweatshirt, that's weird, but. I promise you, I didn't even notice. Because, to be honest, I just scrolled past the picture

because I just didn't care. You know what I mean? I was almost like, I actually said to myself, I said, damn, why would he open himself up to this? You know what I'm saying? Oh, so you think he's using it as like he's monetizing it? Well, he could be getting in front of, being ahead of something. Somebody else might have had the pictures and, you know, to avoid somebody else selling

him to some tabloid or something. He might have done that. Who knows? Yeah. You know, I just, I just want to tell Drake like, yo, your position in the game is solidified. Right. You understand what I'm saying? Like, you are, you are, you are a legend.

You know, you're Drake. Like you're good. You're playing for legacy at this point. And if I was him, I'll lean more into the TV stuff now. You got euphoria. You got top boy. Like, it's much bigger than music with Drake at this point. So that's all I want to say.

Let's do some asking idiot, man, because I got to get on a fucking conference call. Sounds good. With an asking idiot's at, Taylor, gang. Taylor, you can walk back in the room. Shut up. They're in there. They're on the, you have to keep going down.

I'm going to die. First of all, don't talk to me like that. I know you lonely and shit, but don't tell me to keep going down. The fuck is wrong with you, Taylor. I'm over my house. Stop. You know, what?

You said what? I'm over his house. That's disgusting at a time like this. You do not know who that man been in contact with. Do not try to play me. Would you please leave that man's house so he can get back to his fucking family, Taylor? Jesus.

Christ. All right. Ask an idiot. At JP Fortuny says, what is the one thing a person you would give up if it meant you could never catch Corona? The one thing or person I would give up. You would give up. So I would never catch Corona. I'd give up Chris Morel. God damn. Jesus Christ. I'm keeping my guy. Chris. Why would you want to give up Chris? I'll just fuck it with you, Chris. He probably brought it into the country. you notice that Chris did go on vacation and immediately afterwards we had a fucking global pandemic you noticed that right he knew what was coming

he took it like a motherfucker took it serious you know what call the fucking government I think we got them all we know the fucking we know this just started no man I'm not giving up

like what do you want me to give up I'll give up fucking bread sure something like that but I'm not giving up any people I love or any people I work with or anything like that Nah. If we got to get Corona, we got to get Corona. That's how it works. Yeah, I'm pretty cool on it. I'll tell you. I, yeah, I'm, I can't think of nothing I would give up. You know what I'm saying? Like, if Corona was like some super fatal disease, if the mortality rate was like through the roof.

Then would you give up, Chris? That's different. Then would you give up Chris, though? At wave and ingo, asking idiot. What you say? I didn't hear what you say. What you said? Oh, I said, then would you give up Chris? if the mortality rate was high. Nah, I got some people I'd get rid of before, Chris.

Ah, fair enough. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Sorry, Paige. Sorry, Paige. You gotta go. Nah, I keep Paige. Page, I keep Paige. All right, go. Depends how fatal for Page, though.

I don't just play. I love Paige. Wave at Dingle says, how would you spend your stimulus check? Wave and Dingle, I'm going to be honest with you. Charlemagne and I are not getting stimulus checks. Nah.

I'm glad you think we are, though. Yeah. That means that we're still seeing our eye with the people, baby. Yeah, I'm saying? We met him to the people out here, bro. Just talk to us. We'd say he would get really good headphones so he wouldn't have to hear his girl complaining.

That's good. Oh, this is a good one. At Candaceiro, we're doing Ask an Idiot says, what is something new that you guys have learned during this quarantine? Hmm. Oh. I learned how to make an old-fashioned, the drink. Ooh.

Yeah, I've been trying to learn new shit. Me and my girl have been doing stuff. And we try to like theme nights around the food. So like if we're having Italian, we're going to Italy, baby. The wine's got to be Italian. We'll cook up some spaghetti and meatballs, everything through it. You know, we're locked in the house, but we can be outside the house in our experiences. So yeah, we learned how to make an old-fashioned.

That was pretty cool. Yeah, Candah, I haven't learned anything yet. still learning, but I promise you when when God reveals to me what it is, I'm supposed to get out of this situation I shall share. At rest, Posner Posenegg says

which is a better motivator? Praise or criticism. For me, it's definitely criticism. I need critique. I need people to doubt me. I need people to speak out against me.

I need it. I'm going to be honest with you. It is a motivator like a motherfucker. I am Noah building this goddamn arc. Okay. And when I'm telling people it's raining and they're telling me I'm out of my fucking mind. When it starts the rain, when the rain comes,

I don't got to say nothing. I just close the motherfucking arc door and let them fucking drown. So yes, I need criticism. I have performed better with people telling me that I ain't going to be shit, that I'm not going to do shit, that just not going to work,

that just ain't work. I perform better with the criticism. Praise to me, it's just cool. You know what I'm saying? And it's weird because I always say that I fall in between what my dad tells me. My dad used to always say,

you're never as good as they say you are, you're never as bad as they say you are. And so I kind of subscribe to that. So when it comes to the praise, it's just like, thank you. Because when people say they give you praise, you're not really giving me praise,

you're giving all glory to my creator. You know what I'm saying? I just say thank you. But when it comes to criticism, criticism to me is an insult because when you critique me, you're kind of slapping my creator in the face. You're telling my creator that my creator doesn't know what they're doing.

And they didn't put me in this position for a reason. Whether it's so-called wins or whether it's so-called losers, it doesn't matter. I'm in that position because my God wanted me to be in that position. So when you insult me, or critique that you insulting my God. That's why I take it so personal. Now me and my God,

got to prove you wrong and make it rain. I love that. That's beautiful. Yeah, I think I agree. Adversity introduces a man to himself. So I think you get more out of adversity. Though I think praise is important. And I think, I think, I believe in myself.

So I don't need praise, but praise is nice because it, confirms that belief. You know, like, if you're one of those people who believes in it, you know who believes in themselves also? Crazy people. They believe in themselves. You know what? Homeless people, they believe in themselves.

When they hear those fucking voices, they believe in themselves. So it's like, it's nice when that belief that you have is also validated. I wouldn't deny that, you know? So, yeah, 100%. I think I need a balance of both. What else? Um, I think that's it, man. My man.

I got to get on this conference. call. You do your thing, bro. Hey, let the people know. Y'all be safe out there. Everybody remain healthy. Trust me, we're going to get through this. All our billion idiots tribe, man. This is, this is just another chapter in this book called Life. Always remember what your uncle Charlotte says. I don't believe in good or bad experiences. I just believe that all of this is part of one long process. And I think that this is a great process that we're going through because I feel like the world is going to be totally different. Once we come out on the other side of this, I really feel like, you know, God is showing us what truly matters in this moment. And really what matters, man, is what has

always mattered and what people have always screamed matters. And that's just having empathy for people. You know what I'm saying? That's just looking out for your fellow man, not thinking you're better than anybody. Like, there is no supremacy. There is no superiority because just like this, God can put everybody in the same fucking arc. 100%. That's it. 100%. So as always, if you listen to this podcast,

you think we're smart, you think we're intelligent, you think we're brilliant, you're absolutely right. If you listen to this podcast, you think we're just a couple idiots and don't know shit, you're right too.

It's the brilliant idiotist podcast. Thank you for listening. Peace. Peace, y'all. Peace.