The Brilliant Idiots - WorthyVille

Episode Date: December 26, 2019

Happy Holidays! This week Charlamange Tha God and Andrew Schulz discusss worthiness, Dababy going viral, Eddie Murphy on SNL, we do #askanIdiot, and more!!! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit meg...aphone.fm/adchoices

Transcript
Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:00 It's so stupid. It's positively brilliant. The brilliant idiots'all. Shalamaine the guy. Andrew Sheld. We are the Brilliant Idiots Podcast, and this week's Brilliant Idiots is brought to you by... We're going to start it later?
Starting point is 00:00:13 You know what? I think we're in Miroles. We got it. Oh, it's Miroles. It's brought to you by someone, but later. It's bought to you by me and Andrew Shows. That's what the fuck is bought to you by. That's a fact.
Starting point is 00:00:22 Brought to you by Christmas. Christmas, man. The holiday season. This is our last brilliant idiot's podcast of the year. last original content Burying Nidious podcast of the year Drove into the city today No problem
Starting point is 00:00:35 I thought I was going to be late Left Jersey at 820 It's like a ghost town out this motherfucker Which is wild Because I would think everybody Would be doing their last minute Christmas shopping Have you done all of your Christmas shopping?
Starting point is 00:00:45 I did, yeah I mean because my wife does all our Christmas shopping So everything is Amazon Prime And fucking Yeah She does everything online I went one place in particular Okay
Starting point is 00:00:56 Slued to my dude Greg Yuna you know, Greg. Greg was on here. Yes, Greg is... A dentist guy? No, no, he's a jeweler. Jeweler.
Starting point is 00:01:05 Yes, that's right. Yeah, Greg's a jeweler. So I went by him to pick up a couple of things. But that's about it. That's the only Christmas shopping that I did. Greg is, though. Greg is actually in the new Adam Sandler movie, Uncut Gems.
Starting point is 00:01:18 They've been promoting this movie nonstop. I thought it was on Netflix. Bro, me too. Yo, times are changing, bro. Because I keep hearing about this shit. I'm like, where if I will see this shit on Netflix? So then I finally Google it I'm looking at all the show times
Starting point is 00:01:30 The movie times I'm like man I'm not leaving my house to go see this shit I heard it's good though Non-stop yeah Kevin Garnett I think is in it as well So that's the movie KG is in Yes So the movie that Adam Sandlin KG are running around promoting Yes
Starting point is 00:01:43 Is uncut gyms Yes Got you Greg you are crazy for putting that long ass piece On your Instagram page That's what made me think it was on Netflix Wow what he said Because it's just this long piece of him in the film
Starting point is 00:01:53 It's like his whole scene damn there And I'm thinking like Oh this must be on on Netflix. That's why I thought I could go watch it. But it's not. So I guess they either gave him that to promote or he got a boule copy or something.
Starting point is 00:02:04 But, saluted my dual grade unit. Yeah. But, yeah, I went to the ER yesterday. Four? Because I'm just like the most anxiety.
Starting point is 00:02:15 Okay. I can have the worst anxiety when I hear about something. What did you hear about? So it's like, you know, for the past few months, you know, I'd be having headaches.
Starting point is 00:02:24 Nothing crazy. Like nothing that makes me go like, oh, I'm about to die, but it's just a little bit abnormal for me. So I'm like, damn, did I put something else in my diet? Like, what's causing me to have these headaches? And then last week, somebody that I know,
Starting point is 00:02:37 his name is Tyrone Garnett, he passed away. And at first I heard that he passed away from a brain aneurysm. But then I was talking to his mother, sleut to Miss Jimmy Sue, talking to his mother this weekend, and his mother told me that he actually died of brain cancer. Eye, yeah, y'a. And so these headaches that I've been having, in my mind immediately,
Starting point is 00:02:56 my crazy ass mind I'm like holy shit I might have a brain I might be having a brain energy holy shit I might have a brain cancer holy shit So I already had a scheduled appointment with the neurologist on January 14th
Starting point is 00:03:08 I'm like fuck that Up it I'm going to the ER this weekend Yeah Because I gotta go out of the country I'm going to Anguilla I don't want to be worried about I can't be having that shit on my mind
Starting point is 00:03:16 You know what I mean So I go to fucking the ER yesterday And I'm fine Nothing just like migraines regular shit But yo nobody in the ER gives a fuck that I was in the ER. First of all, salute to all the beautiful people that I met yesterday.
Starting point is 00:03:35 Yeah, yeah, yeah. But let me tell you something. In a span of me sitting down, handing them my insurance card and, you know, whatever, going through the process. I had to take a picture, okay? I spoke to somebody's daughter on the phone. Yeah. I listened to two songs. Okay.
Starting point is 00:03:53 I listen to two songs. and another selfie and another guy another guy had on the mask while he was taught like literally had the mask on the SARS mask on the SARS mask right
Starting point is 00:04:05 I thought that was you I thought that was you I'm like hey man I don't know I don't I don't know I haven't figured this what's the word I'm looking for
Starting point is 00:04:16 I don't like the word celebrity I haven't figured this celebrity fame thing out I mean that's that's fame the hospital is the great equalizer I thought about that yesterday. It's like the airport.
Starting point is 00:04:29 Yo, I thought about that yesterday. Now, there's a certain level of wealth where, like, you go to Teterboro when you fly out of New York, you go to the private airport. I've done that a couple times. But most rich people are going to the airport. Absolutely. You could go clear, you could TSA, you do whatever. If you have an emergency and you got to go to the hospital. You got to go to the ER.
Starting point is 00:04:50 No, you're right. I thought about that yesterday. I was like, yo, man, because I was thinking just in life, we start the same thing. place, you're in the same place. Dead and off. You're coming out of vagina and you're going to end up in a coffee. Yeah. Like, that's just everybody, right? Unless you get cremated, whatever.
Starting point is 00:05:04 But our C-section, you know what I mean? Same thing. Right. So for me, it's like, when you're doing stuff like that happens, you have no choice. Like, I thought about that yesterday as I'm sitting in the ear. I'm like, yo, the ER is really the great equalizer, yo. Yeah. Like, no matter who you are, what you do in your life, you're going to have to come here at some point.
Starting point is 00:05:22 Were you flattered that they were taking pictures? while they're dying? Yeah, you know, for whatever reason, I wasn't bothered. I wasn't bothered. Because, you know, my thing is like, I think about the universe, right? And I'm like, damn, well, you know, salute to the brother. The brother was actually a really cool dude, you know, his daughter sings.
Starting point is 00:05:38 SARS mask guy? No, no, no, no. He was there because he was sick too. He did have a mask on, but he took it off to talk to me, which I appreciate it. But it's like. You appreciated that? I don't know. Keep that shit on.
Starting point is 00:05:48 Right? But he was like, the funniest thing, though, he sat by me and he goes, yo, pardon my smell. I've been trapping. You know what I mean? Because the hospital was like in between like Patterson and Wayne and all these different places, right? So he was like, I'm for Patterson. So he's sitting there chopping it up and he was letting me hear his daughter.
Starting point is 00:06:07 And the reason I wasn't upset because I was like, where was I going? Hold on. He said part of my smell I've been trapped. I've been trapping. Let me just understand this here. Trapping is selling drugs, right? I guess because we had a whole conversation about that too about the word trapping and how, you know, We can change the connotation
Starting point is 00:06:25 because trapping don't always necessarily mean selling drugs. It just means you hustling. I didn't ask no questions. It wasn't my business. But if he's suggesting it, it's probably... He just said trapping. I don't know what it was.
Starting point is 00:06:35 Because the illest part about this whole situation... How does it make you smell? It's standing on a corner. This is like an outside smell. That's all. It's crazy. It's not crazy. It wasn't anything crazy.
Starting point is 00:06:46 It wasn't anything crazy. The illest part about him, though, that's just why you can't... Perception means nothing. He's tall brother, long dreds. He's in there because he's not feeling well. Sitting down telling me, pardon this smell, because he's trapping, yada, yada, yada.
Starting point is 00:06:59 But then he's like, yeah, I go to school for, you know, culinary. I do pastries. With it. Real hard. With it. Look it. Well, no. I thought that was dope.
Starting point is 00:07:10 Then he started showing me his brother, his brother, his brother from Patterson. He does culinary work in, like, Miami somewhere. He went to some fancy restaurants. You've shown me all of these fancy dishes that he's made. And I'm like, yo, this is dope. Turns out. And that's how we turned it to the, had the trap conversation, because I started talking about a trap kitchen.
Starting point is 00:07:28 And I was telling him about how, you know, look at this. They call it trap kitchen. Right. Because trapping don't necessarily always mean hustling. You know what I'm saying? Trapp can just be a location. Like if the hood is where you get, if you get your money out someplace in the hood, that could be the trap.
Starting point is 00:07:40 And I'm like, yeah, I can't wait to see that trap pastry spot. You know what I mean? So I'm saying all that to say, nobody gives a fuck if you're sick in the ER. Yeah. Okay, they still want that goddamn picture. They're going to get that. And they still want that conversation.
Starting point is 00:07:52 Matter of fact, that selfie's even more valuable. Because you could be dead. Right? Imagine they got the last picture with Charlemagne the guy. Hey, man, absolutely. You're in there for brain cancer. Possibly.
Starting point is 00:08:03 Is that what you told them? No. I was trying to explain to the doctor. You know, the doctor looked at me so stupid. The doctor was like, you don't have a brain to them. Yeah. But how do you know?
Starting point is 00:08:13 Yeah, exactly. I'm like, I need a, I said I need a CAT scan. Yeah, I need a kid. He said, that's too much radiation. He was like, you know, if you was to get something done with your head, it would be an MRI.
Starting point is 00:08:22 He said, you don't need that. All right? He gave me a shot. They gave me a shot of some Moulteran, made me take three Tylenol's. And then, which I thought was like so fucked up, they made me sit there and watch the rest of the Cowboys game. It was like, just sit here.
Starting point is 00:08:33 It was like, sit here, you know, and tell me how you feel. So I'm watching the game. And I'm like, do I feel fucked up because my Cowboys lost? Because I still got a headache. Like, I couldn't figure this shit the fuck out. And then he gave me a prescription for something that's a little bit stronger for migrains and sent me all my way. You have migrants.
Starting point is 00:08:53 Um bro I just think I really think it's just all in my fucking head Well yeah that's where my grines are Shut up man You know what I'm saying I really drive myself crazy With shit like that bro
Starting point is 00:09:08 It's the weird I can't explain it It's the weirdest thing in the world You know what's weird is it like Your ability to manifest things Oh But listen Gift and curse
Starting point is 00:09:17 Oh Right That's a weird sound It's the story of my fucking The gift is, I'll manifest a career. I'll manifest all these different things. The curse is I'll manifest brain cancer or any other body ailment. That's why my anxiety gets the best of me.
Starting point is 00:09:36 That's why I actually titled my book, Anxiety, Playing Tricks on Me. Right. But worth it? Isn't it worth it? It is. But, yo, you got to get a handle on it because, yo, I really do believe my thoughts become things in a real way. So if I'm thinking some real fucked up foul shit, I try to dismiss that quickly because I've seen so much other shit that I've manifested
Starting point is 00:09:55 in my life happened just because of my thoughts. I don't want this shit to happen because of me. And that shit right, they'll drive you crazy. It's like, stop thinking about that, stop thinking about that, stop thinking about that, stop thinking about that. Like that shit is wild, bro. But the benefit is good. Like, there are some annoying things that come with it. Yes.
Starting point is 00:10:08 But the benefits like being white. Talk to me. I can't relate. It's great. Talk to me. It's great. You get to achieve all these things. It's absolutely amazing.
Starting point is 00:10:18 But you're different, though. You're one of those people who leans into their privilege, which I don't see the, which I think. you should. Well, you know what, yeah. Well, I don't, I don't view it as privilege even if it is. Okay. I get it. That's like having a big dick, but acting like a smoke.
Starting point is 00:10:32 Yeah, maybe. Because if you act like you have a big dick, you're just going to fuck cautiously. Yeah. Right? So you're not going to treat these women equally. Right? You're going to be like, oh, my God, I could hurt them. I need to fuck super cautiously.
Starting point is 00:10:48 Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So my feeling with, like, being white and white privileges, I can. I can't treat you like an equal if I don't believe you are. You're a giant, right? So you walk in a room and you have to watch where you step because you'll step on people. That would be if I really believed in my white privilege. By the way, which is what I tell all, I tell all extremely talented gifted people that. Right?
Starting point is 00:11:14 Like if you're extremely talented and extremely gifted and you know you're extremely talented and you're extremely gifted, you shouldn't have to be like this. But you just got to watch your step when you come into a room because you're a fucking, A giant. Absolutely. Absolutely. Absolutely. But I guess what I'm saying about the white privilege thing is that if I subscribe to that, I can't treat you or Taylor or Alex or Dwayne or kind of. Exactly. So when you're interacting with people, you're interacting from this place of I am more privileged or I'm whatever. So in order for me to treat my friends as equals, I have to not subscribe to the privileged matrix. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And I feel like these people who super subscribe. to the privilege matrix are the ones that are constantly apologizing or like feeling bad or pitying
Starting point is 00:11:58 people. And then all of a sudden you don't have real relationships with people. I get what you say. Guilt-based relationship. So it is a weird I don't say anything wrong with that. I see it. It's the only way like that's the only way I could possibly like make these types of jokes with you guys.
Starting point is 00:12:15 Because when I'm joking with you guys you know that there is no filter that's being placed there because of the color of your skin. Right, yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm literally making the joke that I would make. Because I'm a comedian. But also because you're my friend, not my black friends. Right?
Starting point is 00:12:28 But if you become my black friend, now I'm treating you differently. And the whole point of all this shit is so we don't treat each other differently because of our skin color. That's the whole thing that we're trying to go towards. I see that with a lot of people, though, not even just taking it out of whiteness.
Starting point is 00:12:41 I just think anybody that has any tremendous level of success because don't get a twist of it. You know, rich people too. Absolutely. What about the rich people? And I think you even spoke about this. It's like if Beyonce walks in the room and Beyonce says hi to everyone.
Starting point is 00:12:55 It's a total different ballgame than if... That's it. Like the custodian walks in hand says hi to everyone. Even though I look at it, all is respecting. That's how you're supposed to be. But if Beyonce does it, it's like some superpower. Can you believe she spoke to everybody? But she got to introduce herself as Beyonce.
Starting point is 00:13:09 Oh, I've seen her do that. But that's beautiful. And then people go, why are you doing that? You don't got to do that. But at the same time, she's like, I need to be human with you. Yeah. Do you what I mean? You got to take the edge off immediately.
Starting point is 00:13:20 Being white is like being Beyonce. I see the point It's crazy To the left To the left All the minorities To the left Listen
Starting point is 00:13:33 As crazy as it sounds I see the point I'm being honest with you I see what are you saying Like it's almost like Yo you just got to It's like checking your privilege It's like knowing you got a gun
Starting point is 00:13:44 But I don't got to pull it out I don't got to wave it Until everybody get on the floor I like to act like I don't got a gun Yeah Yeah Yeah Because if I don't got a gun
Starting point is 00:13:51 Well I don't But Everybody feels comfortable. Yeah. No, I get it. I get it. I totally get it.
Starting point is 00:13:58 You know what I mean? Like you're walking around and people's like, yo, this guy's acting like, you don't even have a good. It makes perfect sense. I'm going to tell you something, though. I also came to a revelation last week in therapy. I went to therapy on Friday. And I've been feeling this way for the past few much, which is actually going to be a direct 180 from what I was just talking about. Right.
Starting point is 00:14:15 But so you are going to suck Sakashi. No, no, no, no, no. I finally, I finally feel worthy, bro. Ooh. I finally got. into a place of worthy. Now, explain worthiness. Last year I had a conversation with Bishop T.D. Jaxon.
Starting point is 00:14:31 It's something that I've always dealt with. It's like, my therapist, it calls it imposter syndrome. Yes. This is very common. Yeah, yeah. Very common for women in the workplace. Really? Oh, wildly common.
Starting point is 00:14:43 I think it's very common for, like, people, especially us in the industry. It's common for us in the industry because we've achieved, you know, immense success in a field that's so difficult to feel successful. But they say that women, in the workplace, even in doing normal jobs, often have this imposter syndrome, being like, are they going to figure out that I'm a fraud? I don't really deserve this, do I belong, this at the other. And that's like social conditioning that they actually grow up in. A woman's not supposed to be a scientist or this kind of shit.
Starting point is 00:15:09 So while all these people look up to you and they're like, oh my God, that's Charlotte, man. God, he's got all these skills, et cetera. They're still a part of you that's thinking, why the fuck do I have this? As crazy as that sounds. Absolutely. I deal with it all the time. It's just, it's like guilt.
Starting point is 00:15:23 Like, you know, you can deal with, the, I guess, survival's remorse. And then when you look back, you know, at your hometown and you look at all the people that you grew up with and they may not necessarily be doing. What's so different about me? Exactly.
Starting point is 00:15:33 What's so, like, what's so unique and special about me? Like, there's nothing. And you'll tell yourself that, oh, there's nothing special about you. Like, yeah, whatever. And so Bishop T.D. Jakes told me last year, and that's why I actually posted that this weekend. He told me last year, he was like, you have to get to a place of worthy.
Starting point is 00:15:47 And he said that it's because when you were, he said most people that were touched when they were young. He said, fond of, like, you know, because I was, touched on when I was eight. Yeah. And he was like, when you would, when you were touched on by you were young, you never quite feel worthy.
Starting point is 00:16:00 And that hit me so hard because... Someone couldn't even wait. Check it out, though. When I made her stop, she started talking down on me. So it wasn't a touching, it was the criticizing afterwards. Yeah. The touching would imply that, you know, you were the most worthy.
Starting point is 00:16:14 Yeah. But when I stopped letting her do it, that's when she was like, oh, you got a big nose anyway and you ugly and this is that, isn't that? So it's like, I don't know, I never thought about it. But it's ingrained in you. Absolutely. Absolutely. And so he said that's a common thing.
Starting point is 00:16:27 And it's very important that you see the worthiness. And I'm going to tell you why. People who have been fondled when they're little always feel unworthy. They always feel used in some way. And that lingering effect stays in your life of being somebody's toy. And you don't feel real. You feel like a toy on the shelf. but you're real
Starting point is 00:16:54 and you have something or you wouldn't be there people don't get there by wishing and they don't get there by work you have to have some sort of gift or charisma or a thing about you that causes people to want to hear you
Starting point is 00:17:11 believe it receive it it's yours and then I remember hearing Tyler Perry speak about how you have to get to a place of work because if you don't get to a place of work because if you don't get to a place of worthy, right? God will take away, you know, whatever it is that he's bestowed upon you.
Starting point is 00:17:29 Right. You know, because you're not appreciating it. And, you know, you'll find a way to self-sabotage. You know what I mean? You'll find a way to talk yourself out of things. And if you live in a place where you don't feel worthy, then you can't allow any good thing to come into your life. Every good thing you find a way to self-sabotage it in the back of your mind.
Starting point is 00:17:48 You may be saying, oh, yes, I want this for sure. I want this for sure. But that unworthiness, and that comes from something mama said or daddy said or childhood or bullying or abuse. So you carry all of that into adulthood and you don't feel worthy. And in searching my own motivations, I realized very early on that I didn't think I was worthy until I learned in the word that I'm worthy because God says you're worthy. Yeah, yeah. If God gave you the breath in your body, then that makes you worthy. And just that alone took a lot of the guilt out of it for me, you know?
Starting point is 00:18:20 and understanding that his thoughts toward us are pure. Yeah. And to give us a hope. You know, those things are very, very important. And I think that if more people could understand, that's what another reason I want to write the book, it's just get too worthy.
Starting point is 00:18:33 Over the past few months, right? Yo, I literally be just riding and having these, these, this energy just overcome me. I'm like, man, I'm really blessed. Like, yo, I'm really, I'm really. really feel good. Like, oh, thank you God. Like these pockets of gratitude.
Starting point is 00:18:54 And it's like, I can't describe it in my mind. My therapist was saying that it's all of these positive endorphins. She said it's like when you're working out. You know how you work out? And how you feel like, whoo. She was like, it's like that. And I was like, man, I've been really feeling that the past few months. And like, yo, last week I just was like, oh, I really feel worthy.
Starting point is 00:19:11 Like everything that I've done, everything that I'm doing, everything that I'm going to do. Just me as a human being, my family, my friends, like, I am worthy of all of this greatness that is around me. And, man, when I tell you, that shit was, like, a revelation. Like, I've never had, like, eye opening, like, oh, shit. Like, is this what Molly feel like? Like, is this what X-Dexec feel like? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:19:41 Is this what Shrooms feel like? Yeah. Really. Not Shrooms. Molly. Molly. Yeah. Really.
Starting point is 00:19:46 So, because you know how you're operating on, like, you're operating on a deficit, right? You didn't feel worthy like you were empty. Yeah. So you're trying to fill that emptiness with things probably in your career, these different successes that you made, right? Molly, for me, and I'm not promoting it per se, even though it's fucking fantastic, is not only do you get filled up emotionally, that void that you're talking about, right?
Starting point is 00:20:11 You have excess. And then you have the gratitude. And when I realize whenever I have access, the first place it goes is everyone... Other people, word up. And, like, say what you want about religion and religious folks, but truly religious folks that really believe it never are taking. They are constantly in give mode.
Starting point is 00:20:31 Absolutely. And I think, I truly believe, and I'm someone who wasn't raised with religion, but I truly believe that their void gets filled with God, or the belief in God, or the belief that God loves them. Yeah. You know what I'm saying? That emptiness that a lot of those feel, so it's like, that idea
Starting point is 00:20:50 that idea of like feeling worthy is really interesting because it's a double-edged sword your lack of feeling worthy probably drove you to greatness if Michael Jordan felt worthy he wouldn't be the greatest NBA player of all time
Starting point is 00:21:07 what did Michael Jordan talk about in his All-Star except or not his Hall of Fame acceptance speech All the rejection that he experienced Because he didn't feel worthy So it's this weird thing where it's like what would you prefer? Yeah. I mean, listen.
Starting point is 00:21:24 What would you prefer? Yo, it's a process, man, and I'm going to tell you something. It's a beautiful journey, you know, because, like, just me constantly feeling like that, like never feeling like I quite belong. And I always felt like that was a good energy to have because I felt like if I ever got, if I ever felt in that space, I would get comfortable. But that's not, that's not the case. Now you feel like you're still driven.
Starting point is 00:21:45 I'm even more driven. And the reason I'm even more driven is because of what you just said. Yeah. I want to continue to be full enough. constantly have my cup overflowing so I can provide for everybody else. That's the transition that some entertainers don't make, some like rock stars don't make.
Starting point is 00:22:00 That's why a lot of these athletes, not even athletes, but that's why a lot of these entertainers kill themselves. I truly believe that. It's because they get to a point where they have everything they ever dreamed of and they're still miserable. Well, that's because they're in their head
Starting point is 00:22:12 that it's about them. Right. It's not about you anymore. They didn't make the transition to, oh, the new way to be, before the way to be happy was, sell this many albums, do this many tours, et cetera.
Starting point is 00:22:20 Then you transition. to, how do I help my friends sell this many albums? How do I help my friends? The greatest, Dr. Wayne W. Dyer said that your purpose in life is service to others. It's hard to get there when you can't even serve yourself. It's like, I feel like on some level you need, you know what? When they say on an airplane, they're like, put your oxygen mask on first before you help the kids. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:22:42 And our natural instinct would be, well, there's kids here. Let's put the oxygen mask on first. But the plane people are like, motherfucker, if you can't breathe, you can't help nobody. You can't help nobody. So it's like, I think the idea with this, with this like fill in the void thing is once you fill yourself, it will naturally spill over. It's like one of those champagne glass towers and those fancy, you know, hotels or something, you know, when they have, or like a wedding, they have like 100 champagne glasses. Yeah, yeah. And they just fill the top one.
Starting point is 00:23:12 And then all of them start to get fill. But if that top one doesn't fill, you know how hard it is to fill each one individually? And I don't want anybody in here that's, that's, you know, how hard it is to fill each one individually. And I don't want anybody in here that's hearing me to think that you have to get successful in order to help. Because my grandmother would- Just full. Well, yeah, and my grandmother would always tell me that manners will take you where money won't. And, you know, for me, like, I always say money doesn't change you.
Starting point is 00:23:33 It just multiplies whatever you are. Yeah. I've always been a giver just because that's what I always used to see my folks do. Right. My father, regardless of what his financial standing was, was always giving something. I don't get a fuck if it was a beer. You know what I mean? Yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 00:23:46 My grandmother was always giving something no matter what her financial status was just because she would cook and, you know, he you want to eat, you're hungry no matter who you were. So I was always that type of person. I would always want to, you know, just be of service to people. But now sometimes when you get an overabundance to something, you can find yourself being selfish. And it's easy for me to have this conversation now because I've finally figured it out. But even talking to my daughter the other day, my daughter, you know, they do Secret Santa. She do Secret Santa Chile and Secret Santa's school, all different places. So she ended up getting like a bunch of the same game.
Starting point is 00:24:16 It was like some candles or something like that. And she's complaining about having the same gift. And I say right now you're not being grateful that you have an overabundance of something. I mean, what kid gets another kid at candle? It's a shitty fucking present. So she's so funny you said that because she said to me, well, the person that gave it to me told me they wish they had got me something else. I said that's probably because knowing you, you made a face at her and was like, I already got a, I already got this. You know what I mean?
Starting point is 00:24:43 So you probably made her feel bad. We have electricity. We don't need candles. Who the fuck gives a kid? Why would a kid ever buy a candle? That is the dumbest gift. No, yo, these kids... What school is this?
Starting point is 00:24:51 Are you saying your kids are like a special school or something like that? It's private, but these scented candles are bomb. You don't care how good a candle smells. Bro, these kids are a fucking candle. It's a nuisance. It's just trash. You have to clean it all up. Some of these kids are in the mindfulness way more than us, bro.
Starting point is 00:25:04 So they're meditating? Yes. Yo, what if they gave it? Hey, give us to your dad. It will come down. Me and my daughter meditate together. Really? Oh, yeah.
Starting point is 00:25:10 This is great. Yeah, yeah. I meditate with my daughter. to do breathing exercises and everything. This is great. Absolutely. But she had the candle. I told her,
Starting point is 00:25:17 you got six of the same candle. What should you do? She was like, I don't know. I was like, now is your opportunity being that you have an overabundance of something
Starting point is 00:25:25 to be a blessing to somebody else? Yes, so beat all those kids over the head with those candles. Someone else will appreciate that candle. Who is going to appreciate a candle? The kids. Who in history, outside of Paul Revere,
Starting point is 00:25:37 has ever been excited that there is fucking candles? You sold from New York. Why? Because you have never experienced a hurricane and had a natural disaster or anything. Because when you do... I did have a hurricane. Listen, if something's going to happen...
Starting point is 00:25:49 I used my iPhone flashlight. We got a candle right here. Wait till that shit go dead. It's going to come a point in time where America's going to get hit with some type of natural disaster. You'd be like, where the fuck of those candles that Shalaman's daughter had? And I'm going to light the candle and it's going to go on. I'm like, wow, the most minimum amount of light. This is so exciting.
Starting point is 00:26:08 Thank God. Thank God I can barely see still. Still. One candle doesn't light shit. Yes, it does. Bro, one candle? If I turned off all the lights in this room and lit one candle, you would be shocked.
Starting point is 00:26:20 How dark it was. No, how bright it was. There'd be a little thing of light in the middle and nothing else. We still got the lights. We got the lights from the window, though. Yeah, if it was pitch black... See how you guys are talking out of this candle? Listen, you would love a candle, bro.
Starting point is 00:26:34 Candles are shit. Candles suck. That's why we replace them immediately. No, no, no. I love candles. That's why candles got to smell good because just being a candle isn't enough. They're like, hold on. Did you get me a just candle?
Starting point is 00:26:43 This doesn't smell like apple cinnamon or anything. They do just provide a shitty light. They are better when they're sent it. Say what? They are better when they're sent. Because they do nothing when they're not. Even when they're scented. Even when they're scented, they suck.
Starting point is 00:26:55 Listen, fuck the candles. Fuck the candles. The moral of the story is when you have every right to be pissed off at these pieces of shit kids. No. Who raised them? The moral of story is. You know what?
Starting point is 00:27:06 They didn't buy a present. They grabbed some candles from their parents. All right? Say again? Good Catholic people. They stole church candles? They're stealing candles from Jesus as Christmas presents. If that isn't the most fucked up shit.
Starting point is 00:27:18 But when you have an overabundance of something, just be a blessing to somebody else. Because guess what? I told her. Like, our nanny just turned 60. Give her a candle. Oh, she needs that vibrator. What are you talking about?
Starting point is 00:27:28 But, but, but, but, but, but the candle. What? That's how you make it scented. Smell like the Great Depression. The moral of the story is, when you have an overabundance of something, be a blessing to somebody else. Okay?
Starting point is 00:27:43 Even when you don't have an overabundance or something, be a blessing to somebody else. But I'm telling you, man, when you get to that place of worthy, that shit is better than any drug, bro. Yo, I 100% agree. It is an amazing experience to have. I will tell people that if you try to fill yourself first,
Starting point is 00:27:58 you will, it will naturally happen where you want to give to these other people. Because right now we can sit here and be like, hey, give to other people. It's going to make you feel good, and it will. A hundred percent will. Immediately.
Starting point is 00:28:10 There are people listening right. Now they're like, ah, this doesn't make you feel good. And there's no way to convince you it does. But it's going to organically happen once you have what you need. Listen, by the way, I'm not here to try to convince you. Like when you get drunk, the second you're drunk, you're like, who wants a drink? Anybody want to be? You're literally trying to give your friends things.
Starting point is 00:28:25 Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I've got two next rounds on me, blah, blah, blah. Like, everybody likes the drunk guy. You know what I mean? It's constant giving. You're giving. If you're a nice drunk guy, you have angry drunks out there. Even if you're an angry jump, you're giving ass weapons.
Starting point is 00:28:37 Yeah. Do you what I mean? You're beating up your family. You're still giving it. You're slapping your dick on people's forehead when they sleep. Okay. Who did that? I don't know.
Starting point is 00:28:45 I've just seen videos. Chodey slap. What's they call it? A chody slap. What is the chody slap? Chodysl. So why do you act like you didn't know what I was talking about? What is that?
Starting point is 00:28:52 Don't blame it on Puerto Ricans. Well, technically it's Mexicans. Oh, Mexican. Don't blame this. That's white people's shit. Yeah, but we don't do it when we're drunk. We'll be stoned sober. He's like, hey, you know, he's sleep, he's sleep.
Starting point is 00:29:08 He's just sitting. You know, run up behind him, slap his date your dick on the floor. Constantly. Constantly. Listen, that's the thing for 2020, man. You love dick games, dude. Do you feel like you're at a place of worthy? Yeah, no, both, intermittently.
Starting point is 00:29:24 Talk to me. Times where I feel so grateful and I just want to share everything and I'm so lucky and so happy. And then there's times where, you know, I feel insecure and I feel like I need to feel it. I feel like I need to do things. But I at least know what the feeling is. You know, that's cool. I just know where I want to be and I know where I am.
Starting point is 00:29:41 But I'm also motivated by not having. And I'm also motivated by trying to get there. I feel like I've seen you get to a place where I'm. And the reason I feel like I've seen you get to a place of worthy is because I've seen you, I think I've seen you align with your purpose this year.
Starting point is 00:29:55 Okay. You know what I mean? Just as far as like, you know, taking your career in your own hands. Yeah. Telling the kind of material you want to tell. So basically you're giving the messaging you want to give out. You're telling the stories.
Starting point is 00:30:07 you want to tell. Yeah. And I think that has helped you, you know, align with your purpose and has helped just God open up a multitude of things in your life. Yeah. You know, a lot of different blessings that you probably wouldn't have had
Starting point is 00:30:20 100% a year ago because you necessarily didn't feel worthy. I feel like, and I've been saying it over the past couple of years that I feel like this is the first time I'm truly walking in my purpose, right? Yeah, yeah. But that doesn't necessarily mean I felt worthy. I just felt like I was walking in my purpose. How do you, how do you,
Starting point is 00:30:36 I feel like, For me, probably for you, these are things for serendipitous, right? They just kind of happen. And then all of a sudden you're walking in that path. And then halfway through the path, you go, oh, this is the path I'm supposed to walk in. Let me, let me Google serendipitous before I answer that question. I think I know what it meant based off the context of Houston. Put out of one.
Starting point is 00:30:54 Serendipitous. Hold on. Is a Greek girl. Yes. Yes. Yes. The occurrence and development of events by chance in a happy or beneficial way. Exactly.
Starting point is 00:31:04 It just happened. Like, it's not like you were like, I'm going to walk. in my purpose today. Here's the path I walk. You were doing something and then all of a sudden within it you realize, oh my God, this is what I'm supposed to do. And, you know, I'm sure same thing with me. It's like all these different events happened, which pushed me down this direction. And then now that I'm in the direction, I'm like, oh, this is the exact thing I'm supposed to do. I guess what I'm trying to say is I know there's people listening right now. They're going, how do I walk in my purpose? And the same thing that happened with stand-up
Starting point is 00:31:30 comedy is people go, well, how do I find my voice? People talk about my voice, right? Or even in radio. It's like how do you be Charlemagne and not the people that inspired you? I got that answer. Talk to me. Talk to me. That answer, that answer comes in what I just told you, telling your story. And the reason I say that is because my true purpose, I feel like happened when I started putting out literature, right? When I wrote my first book, Black Privilege. Because even though I've told my story on radio, told my story on podcast, when you actually package it together and you give people this, right?
Starting point is 00:32:04 And the way I packaged it because I'm big on self-help books, right? So it's like I gave you eight lessons that I learned in my life based off my life experiences that I think can help you. Now, prior to that, I didn't really move around like that.
Starting point is 00:32:16 You know what I'm saying? I stopped going to the clubs and all of that type of stuff. So when I started going out on my book tours and shit and realizing the effect, your words and your story has on people, right? And so when the next book came out, which was just me detailing my journey in therapy,
Starting point is 00:32:33 right? Like, you know, literally, Chris, when did we start writing that book? It might have took four months. Wow. It might have took four months. Like, honestly, because I was just keeping a journal of everything that was going on.
Starting point is 00:32:47 I'm like, yo, Chris, I think I'm ready to go back in. You know what I'm saying? And so we put that out to the world. I'm just telling my story. I didn't even have it figured out yet. Right. Like I'm, I still have no habit figured out, but I'm in the process of just this mindfulness thing
Starting point is 00:33:00 and going to therapy and just doing the work on myself, getting to a place of healing, and it becomes this thing where you become this unofficial mental health advocate. And people are inspired by your story and they're saying that,
Starting point is 00:33:13 hey, I go to therapy now because of you and things like that. So I'm like, yo, this is my purpose. This is what I'm supposed to be doing. The first book is your first real experience in giving on a macroscopic level.
Starting point is 00:33:31 Meaning you've given out jewels on a breakfast club. Yeah, yeah, yeah. and these types of things, but they were always done for the sake of humor. This was done with humor and drama, but for the point of helping people. With the point of, yeah, it was,
Starting point is 00:33:44 and I always said that. I always say, yo, this is a self-help book for the hood. Right. Without even me, that wasn't even a plain thing. I just like reading self-help books, and I know how self-help books have helped me. So you're like, I just don't feel like. I'm going to do something so they help.
Starting point is 00:33:55 I'm going to do something for people that look like me. Boom. All of a sudden you see the effect of helping people. Absolutely. And you're like, whoa. this is what I got to do, I got to help people. I didn't know that my story
Starting point is 00:34:09 was helping people in that way. So when you asked me about purpose and how to find purpose, I really think it just comes in telling your own unique story. That's it. Whether that lends is through comedy, whether that lends is through radio,
Starting point is 00:34:24 podcasts, books, music, whatever it is. The greatest thing that you can do to assist other people is tell your story. That's how you find your story. purpose. But everybody's story is different. Right.
Starting point is 00:34:35 Like you might have, you might have gotten molested and, you know, got through that. Right. You're telling that story helps millions of people who've been molested. You might be somebody who dealing with anxiety, depression. So you tell your story. Now you're helping millions of people who that are going through anxiety, depression. You might have gotten sexually assaulted.
Starting point is 00:34:53 You might have been totally opposite. You might have had a life where you was privileged and, you know, became the next Steve Jobs, whatever it is. But you told your story. And it energized and empowered somebody else. That's how you find your true purpose. I truly believe that. And does it get addictive?
Starting point is 00:35:11 Yes. In what way? Is it more addictive than the reaction to like a big breakfast club interview? 100%. What is the difference between a big moment in radio and a big moment in altruism, if you will, like helping other people? Those big moments in radio do nothing for me. outside of an entertainment perspective. And you truly know the difference
Starting point is 00:35:37 when you are sitting somewhere and one person runs up to you and tells you that, yo, man, I started going to therapy because of you, man. Thank you for talking about anxiety, depression, you know, whatever. Like, I've really been trying to be more mentally healthy because of you.
Starting point is 00:35:50 That can be one person that nobody ever sees. That shit gives you a different high. But, you know, when you do the soldier boy, the Kashi 6 and 9, whatever, that's just sitting around on your phone, laughing at the memes or going on you, and watching hundreds of thousands of millions of views. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:36:06 Break that down, though. Break it down. So you're in the midst of like, let's say a soldier boy interview, right? Like, you know it's going to be crazy, right? In the middle of it? Do you know it or you're surprised by the reaction? I'm just enjoying that. Like, I'm never, I promise you, I've never thought, I only, and I told you all this
Starting point is 00:36:22 before, I've only thought about the aftermath of something once. Which was? The Floyd May was this shit. Because I did that in my mind, like, oh, this shit about to get mad views. We're about to get married. mad people are going to be talking about this shit. That's the one time I did something for that sole purpose, and it didn't feel good.
Starting point is 00:36:38 Because the intentions weren't right. The intentions weren't right. Didn't feel good. Everything else is organic, naturally happening. Absolutely. But you've been in the game long enough where you're like, this is going to be effective. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 00:36:49 You can predict effectiveness. Yeah, for the most part. And so what is the situation you're in where you're like, oh, this is going to slap? Interview-wise? Yeah. I mean, you just never know how big something's going to be. Like, if we're talking about 2019, I could say,
Starting point is 00:37:03 like Soldier Boy going to be funny But I didn't know that shit was going End up on SNL and all this stuff Like you know what I mean Like I didn't know it was going to be that Even Birdman I didn't think Birdman was going to be that Yeah yeah yeah yeah
Starting point is 00:37:15 You know what I'm saying Where you were like You predicted the reasonable amount of success with it And you just can never tell Like I stay in this year Even when I'm having a conversation With Elizabeth Warren And I'm like
Starting point is 00:37:25 And you like the original Rachel Dozole To me that's a throwaway line But everybody live Yeah Yeah Yeah yeah Discussions on Fox News. To me, that literally was a throwaway line.
Starting point is 00:37:36 That wasn't nothing. I'm like, whatever. So you just never know. You really can't predict it. Certain things you can, certain things you can. So maybe that's the difference. What? Where it's like the success from those interviews is surprising in a lot of ways, right?
Starting point is 00:37:50 The intention was to have a funny line or to have an interesting interview. Just have a good conversation. You have a good conversation, et cetera. And then if there's this amazing reaction to it, that's icing on cake. That's great. The intention with the book. is to help someone. I think it's the same thing.
Starting point is 00:38:05 Fair enough. But if the intention with the book is to help people and they come up to you and they're like, hey, you really help me, that's different. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:38:15 Because you're invested differently in it. You didn't go to that interview with Liz with Warren and go, I'm going to say this dull as all thing and everything's going to go. Maybe you do. I'm not exactly sure. No.
Starting point is 00:38:23 But there's something when when you go out and look for a gift for your girl for fucking weeks and you get the perfect gift and you give it to her, and she breaks down cries and it's just the most amazing experience, that means more than when you just kind of hand your girl a cookie and she's like,
Starting point is 00:38:39 but this is the most amazing cookie I've ever had a minute? I was like, I just had some cookies. Yeah. I thought about that when I was rapping gifts this week because by the way, I totally understand why Christmas rappers should get money. What do you mean?
Starting point is 00:38:51 Have you ever tried to wrap a Christmas gift? Yo, I saw something crazy on the internet. This is that we've been rapping shit wrong the whole time. Really? Yeah. Oh, no, here it is. So this is, I always put the gift in the middle of the paper, right? We have rectangular paper.
Starting point is 00:39:08 I have the iPhone. Fold the edges. Fold these. It doesn't fit, right? I saw on the internet, you just turn the fucking gift. Holy shit. All the sudden. Holy shit.
Starting point is 00:39:24 All the sudden. Holy shit. It's perfect. Holy shit. Literally turn it. What is that? 45 degrees. Holy shit.
Starting point is 00:39:32 Fifteen degrees, no. Holy shit. I don't rap gifts. Oh, man, Taylor. Word is born. When I went to go buy that shit for my wife and daughter, I say, Yo, Greg, you don't have no gift rapping services here? And he's like, nah, and I'm like, fuck.
Starting point is 00:39:44 So my dumb ass wakes up on Saturday morning feeling worthy. You know what I'm saying? I feel nice and worthy. I just posted Bishop T.D. Jake's talking about worthiness. And Tyler Perry talking about worthiness. And NDRI hits me saying, you should really listen to my new album called Worvey. Phenomenal, by the way. I can't believe I slept on that shit this year, right?
Starting point is 00:40:01 And so I'm like, fuck, I'm going to wrap my own. I'm going to wrap these gifts, right? Exactly what you said. Put the shit in the middle. Bro, I try to wrap four gifts. I literally started that shit at about 8.30 in the morning. By the time I looked up, it was 11.30. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:40:14 And I was only on gift number three. I had just finished gift numbers. I'm like, what the fuck? Yeah. I'm like, yo, I really see why these gift wrapping people get paid good fucking money, bro. Yeah, maybe that's why people buy candles. But I said, and by the way, in the midst of that, I said to myself, I don't need to wrap these shit up.
Starting point is 00:40:32 Nah. These shit is some good-ass gifts. The fuck do they really need rapping? How do we even get here? I don't know. But this gift shit is stressing me out because I still haven't got my girl anything. I know, but I bought it up for a reason.
Starting point is 00:40:46 I don't remember why. I need to get my girl a gift. You ain't bought your girl a gift yet? No, I've been busy. I've been on the road. I've been building out the studio. You know, it's been, you know, by the way, guys, you can check out the studio
Starting point is 00:40:57 by the time this comes out. We should be live. But yeah, I've been trying to get my girl. No, because we're going to Africa for Christmas and New Year's. You're making your girl to Africa? What part? Egypt and Morocco. Wow.
Starting point is 00:41:11 Yeah, yeah. I want to see those pyramids, man. You should go to Ghana, bro. One of these days. Yeah, I was going to do that from New Year's Eve and Christmas, but when I saw all these celebrities going, I'm like, no, I'm not going. Yeah. So you're going to each.
Starting point is 00:41:22 Everybody's going to Ghana this year. Yeah. Because it's the 400th year of slavery. So they're going to celebrate it? Yeah. You know what? It's kind of weird. I thought about that.
Starting point is 00:41:32 I was like... So all you guys are going back? It's kind of weird, bro. Like, it's kind of weird. It's kind of weird. It's kind of weird. Like, I said it to myself, I was like, I don't... That's just odd, dude.
Starting point is 00:41:43 It's like celebrating July 4th in England. It's not the celebration of it. It's just the acknowledgement of it. I guess it's like, you know, knowing where you came from type of thing. Yeah, but Americans don't go to, like, Japan for Pearl Harbor Day. I don't do they? I don't know. No, they don't.
Starting point is 00:41:58 I'm sure it's a few. Do you think? Yes. You really believe it? It's the same area People go to Charleston, South Carolina because of the slave quarters
Starting point is 00:42:05 and the slave market. No, that's not why. Why do they like it? I thought, oh no, wait, maybe it was Savannah, Georgia is the one I'm thinking of. Savannah's another place. No, but Savannah was, the Union Army got there on Christmas Day.
Starting point is 00:42:18 I don't remember. And the General Tecumse and Sherman said because it was Christmas Day, he wasn't going to destroy the city because at that time they was just engaged in total war, which means they were just literally moving from city to city down south.
Starting point is 00:42:28 What did you do the next day? Fucked up Biloxi. I don't know. Exactly. Thank you. Thank you for Christmas. But on the 26th, soon as the clock dropped midnight.
Starting point is 00:42:38 Enjoy those gifts at 24 hours because it's over. So you're going to see those pyramids. The pyramid is going to be amazing. That's the thing. I just want to see all these amazing things that, you know, that we've made as human beings. And in my life. You know what I mean?
Starting point is 00:42:50 We helped. Maybe the aliens. That's right. That's right. That's right. Exactly. Like, there's no way in hell human beings made the pyramids. Regardless, let's say they were influenced, right?
Starting point is 00:43:01 Taylor, I'm not having this conversation. Let's say they were influenced. Taylor's 27. You know, it's so crazy. How old are you, Taylor? 27? Yeah, yeah. 28.
Starting point is 00:43:09 And how long have people been having these conversations about the pyramids and who built pyramids? Since the beginning of time. She looked me dead in my eyes and said, you don't think humans made those? I'm not having it. I'm not going, I'm not doing that with you. You're 28. Hey, take out some cash. Do you have some cash, Taylor?
Starting point is 00:43:21 Just give me any bill. I'll show you something interesting. So, when we were up in Boston doing shows, we got access to one of the first Mason lodges in history. Okay. Right? I think it was the oldest one on the West Coast.
Starting point is 00:43:35 It was the one where Paul Revere was the head Mason. Clearly had candles. Love the candles. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. All over, right? And I think almost every president in history has been part of the masons in some way. I think Obama's a Mason. And they're this group.
Starting point is 00:43:49 There's some people look at them like the Illuminati. Anybody can join, by the way, but they have this kind of like mysterious order to. Mason Lodges. The Mason Lodges. We saw all these things. Now, if you look, what's that right there, Taylor? It's a pyramid, right, with an all-seeing eye on top. And if you look at a lot of big American cities,
Starting point is 00:44:05 even in Central Park, you'll see it, and D.C., you'll see it. The Washington Monument is a big... All-see and I? Well, no, it's a big obelisk. You've seen those big, like, pointy, almost pyramid-like structures? The Washington Monument is the only monument that doesn't have the guy on it. It's a Washington monument, but for some reason, it's just this big, tall pyramid shape there.
Starting point is 00:44:25 Why is there, like, this Egyptian influence in... American and Western philosophy and culture. Yeah. And what these guys believe, and correct me if I'm wrong, Mason folks, what these guys believe is that there was alien influence. Had to be. And there continues to be alien influence. And that every once in a while in history,
Starting point is 00:44:46 not necessarily alien, but higher power, whatever you want to believe it is, right? An alien that would control shit for us would be a higher power. It would be God, essentially. And every once in a while, they push humanity on the right course. They nudge humanity in the right direction, right? So we're essentially a game or an experiment of theirs.
Starting point is 00:45:05 And that explains all these amazing things throughout history. The pyramids, for example, electricity, right? Benjamin Franklin, you've heard the story about the kite and the key, right? They're like, they're like, that's not what really happens. Which sounds like total bullshit. Of course it's bullshit. Of course it's bullshit. That should sound like such bullshit now.
Starting point is 00:45:24 But as you know, more than anyone, you need a story. to sell the people on it. So you can't just go, hey, aliens come in and they influence and they told me about this electricity thing that's going to give us an amazing advantage in the new world. That's not a story you can put the newspaper people buying. It could be if the aliens told it, if you got these aliens that are showing you,
Starting point is 00:45:43 like they can do all of this wild children. But they don't want to be known, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Maybe they push people in the right direction without even telling them. I mean, there are a lot of ways it could describe religion. It describes all these things. Maybe they give them some information
Starting point is 00:45:53 and then people go left with it or they go right with it. But still, it is an interesting way of looking at history. and looking at these amazing events that happened in history and trying to fully understand why these events turn out that way. You know? And it's like, is it influence? Is it culture?
Starting point is 00:46:09 Is it the reward system? Who knows what it is? But it is uncanny the influence of like these like Egyptian obelists and all this like Jewish art. As a human who's seen flying sauces before. Right. I saw my first one when I was eight years old. Right.
Starting point is 00:46:22 And monks corner South Carolina hovering over the trees in my grandmother's yard. Yeah. As a human who's been visited. Imagine how this. pointing it would be to travel from millions of light years away and end up at Monk's Corner South Carolina. That's exactly what you would want to be. Imagine of all the shit to see in the world.
Starting point is 00:46:40 You got the pyramids. Hey, man. Remember my great uncle made those pyramids. We got to check those pyramids. That's what you would want to be. Monk's Corner. Yes, a great wall in China. And I'm going to experiment on this little motherfucker right here
Starting point is 00:46:51 and put all types of shit in his body and make him phenomenal to show the world how great we are. Who were you not molested? Who do you take? Your aunt wants you. The aliens, how do you not feel worthy? You're the chosen one, motherfucker. That's right, God damn it.
Starting point is 00:47:07 You're right. Listen, remember when I came in him and I had those cuts on both my legs? You remember that? When I had the cuts on both shins in the same exact place. I've had those. I used to have them right here. You can still see the scars, right? Yeah, Jesus.
Starting point is 00:47:20 Bro. Listen, I know aliens been experimenting on me for a long time. You know who else aliens built? The Joe Rogan podcast. Really? Look at Joe Rogan's logo. Look at his logo, God damn it. Ooh, now we're getting into Conspiracy Charlotte.
Starting point is 00:47:33 Conspiracy Charlotte in the building. Hold on. What the fucking hurt? Oh, Clues bomb. Hold on. You ain't never paid attention to Joe Rogan's logo. So have you been probed and shit? Is that why you like it when your girl puts her finger in your butt?
Starting point is 00:47:46 Come on now. Look at that. What does Joe Rogan have on his logo? Yeah, the third eye. That's right. What's my, Joe believes in all this? What's my nonprofit called? For years.
Starting point is 00:47:54 For 20 plus decades. Huh? Third eye awareness. baby. Oh, come on now. Aliens know what they're doing?
Starting point is 00:48:02 Aliens out there creating some of the greatest media personalities of our generation. All right. Okay? So we can spread the word about them,
Starting point is 00:48:09 all right? And we believe in them. All right? We letting them know the goodness of them and God. Yo, aliens, we appreciate you, man.
Starting point is 00:48:16 Thank you. Keep us on us these blessings, man. It's been working out. We appreciate you. Y'all keep it up, man. Whenever you're ready for it,
Starting point is 00:48:23 whenever you're ready to pull up. You know, Jesus up there like, let him call me an alien one more time. Call me a woman. A motherfuckering alien one more time. And you know what I would say to Jesus?
Starting point is 00:48:31 They call you and all your friends illegal aliens. It builds on a wall for you and all your illegal friends. You know what I'm saying? But no, I believe in UFOs. I believe in all that shit. But salute to Jesus. It's his time. Salute to Jesus.
Starting point is 00:48:49 It's his time. This is his time. What do you mean? Oh, this is his time of year where people, yo, all jokes aside. We talk about this every year. and I thought about this, who gets less credit on Christmas? Who gets acknowledged less on Christmas? Yes.
Starting point is 00:49:04 Jesus or James Brown? James Brown. But Jesus is right there with him. Hold on. What did James Brown do on Christmas? I mean, he just died. I'll be honest with you. Wow.
Starting point is 00:49:23 Wow. I'll do you one better, Taylor. I didn't even know he died. James Brown? Did not another. No fucking clue he died. He really died? Jesus.
Starting point is 00:49:35 Jesus allegedly was born on Christmas. James Brown, I said allegedly, but Jay's Brown died on Christmas. Yeah. Nobody cares about either one. Yeah. But nobody cares like the day people died unless they're killed. That is not true. Name the day anybody else died.
Starting point is 00:49:51 So Jesus was killed. No, that's what I'm saying. If you're killed, we remember it. If you want your death day to be remembered, you got to be killed. Nobody dies calmly and then we figure it out. Santa Claus. Santa Claus ain't dead. Rudolph, the red nose reindeer.
Starting point is 00:50:04 Rudolph dead. Santa Claus ate him. The Grinch. You think Santa Claus is going to be up there and not eat any of them fine as deers, bro? Bro, Jesus is like,
Starting point is 00:50:11 and now we say this every year, but it's the truth. Jesus is, if there was a headliner, right? Yeah. Jesus is not even a Koch, bro. It's like,
Starting point is 00:50:19 it's like, no. It's like, I'm serious. I'm serious. He should headline it right now, okay? He should headlining this hometown. Yeah, that's my God.
Starting point is 00:50:31 country, whatever it is, what I'm saying. If it was, you know what I mean. When you do shows, it's Andrew Schultz. Yes. You got your two opening acts. Right. Right, right, right. But I'll constantly, we're on this shit.
Starting point is 00:50:41 We're going, go on, go on. Jesus is not one of those. Yeah, but Jesus is not headlining. He should be. It's his day. Yeah. His name is in Christmas, Christ. Yeah, but it's cold outside.
Starting point is 00:50:52 You don't want to see some dude fucking naked and shit. He's not dressed for Christmas. Bro, if the naked cowboy could be. If the naked cowboy can be out there in time square naked. Come on now. How can he be naked, dude? I don't understand that. In this weather?
Starting point is 00:51:06 I mean, it's crazy. Hey, God created a man in his image according to his likeness. So if the naked cowboy can do it, I know Jesus could. But did he create everybody in his likeness? Jesus? Yeah. Do you ever see some... Actually, maybe he did because sometimes you see someone so ugly, you go, Jesus.
Starting point is 00:51:23 Do you ever do that? Like, Jesus, Marion Joseph, what the fuck? That's crazy because you do that with good-looking. guys, a good-looking people. Wait, wait, wait. Here we go again. I know, there you go. Here we go.
Starting point is 00:51:36 The baby's meat pick got you going, huh? Start talking about naked men. That penis would do that to you, man. By the way, that baby penis pick, which I haven't seen. Yeah, I saw it. To the right, to the right. It shows how stupid the internet is. Why?
Starting point is 00:51:52 It's not the baby's dick. Why would y'all think that was the baby's dick? I don't know, but that's it was crazy. Because the internet said so. Yeah, yeah. Like, it was just a dick. No, it wasn't just a dick. Bro, I'm just saying it was nothing.
Starting point is 00:52:04 You didn't see who it was attached to. Dude, I thought it was a baby social security number on it? I think he was talking or something. Dude, I don't even know what was going on. I was just so baffled when I said. It looked like a bobsled. Looked like a bobsled. I thought there was four Jamaicans inside of it, to be honest with you.
Starting point is 00:52:21 It was the biggest thing I've ever seen. And it was just curving to the right. How come... Wait, which one do you look at? I looked at the big old flat earth dick. Now see how different, you see how different. There's a dick that curves to the right. You see how different coaches are?
Starting point is 00:52:37 Andrew can talk about the dick. Nobody gives a fuck. Charlemagne says something about dick. Because I'm white. They expect me to be gay. The expectation is gay. That is white privilege. Yes, I can be gay and not be gay at the same time.
Starting point is 00:52:52 This is how white this works. Dick's dog. Dick, Dick. Exactly. Charlemagne mentioned the dickest. No, homo, pause. You're gay. Andrew mentioned the dick.
Starting point is 00:53:03 People really want to have a conversation about it. Like, it's just perfectly normal. Like, yeah, it did curb to the right, didn't it? You know what it is? Black people are paranoid about shit. Like, you're paranoid about, like, racism. I completely understand that, right? Way more paranoid about dicks.
Starting point is 00:53:18 But dicks? By the way? No, no. Is there a lot of undercover gays in a black community? Black men care. Because you're always like, yo. Maybe that's it.
Starting point is 00:53:27 Black men came more about being associated with dicks than they do racism, bro. Let's get down. Ain't no when you, nobody says pause when somebody says
Starting point is 00:53:34 something racist. You know what I'm saying? Nobody says no racism. You know what mean? But just mentioned,
Starting point is 00:53:39 yo, let's go get a burger. Pause. Why is that gay? I don't know. Because it's meat in your mouth. I don't.
Starting point is 00:53:47 I don't know. Yeah, but that's food. It's like, we'll have a kind of thing. What do you mean? So you can't even say let's go get a burger? They'd be like.
Starting point is 00:53:57 Yo. That's gay to say let's go get a burger. Pause. Pause. Pass man, ball. But what if you're like, hey, can I kiss a tip of your dick?
Starting point is 00:54:06 Can I, is that gay? Not if you say no homo. Listen, you know what's so crazy? So if you say no homo, anything after that, dude, this is my thing about no homo that annoys the fucking shit out of me. You're the gayest.
Starting point is 00:54:17 If you say no homo, you're gay. Because you're thinking about gay shit nonstop. You have, you know how like, Charleman, you have anxiety? Yeah. Those people have gay. They got gay on the brain.
Starting point is 00:54:29 Yo, you know what's so wild. Anxiety playing dicks on them. Saturday night I'm online I'm on Twitter because Eddie Murphy was on SNL I haven't seen it yet
Starting point is 00:54:37 I'm watching all these trending topics right So it was We're recording this Monday by the way Go on It was the baby's penis Right
Starting point is 00:54:43 And then it was Logan Paul They said Logan Paul was actually sucking a dick Am I tripping? No Yes I know he was trending
Starting point is 00:54:50 But am I tripping A dick I promise you I didn't I just was reading What people were saying He put the whole glass In his mouth
Starting point is 00:54:55 I have no idea They said Logan Paul was actually sucking A dick There's no way Bro my point is If this is
Starting point is 00:55:00 if this is true, because it could just all be social media shit. I will. Think about that. I got to text Logan. The baby, the baby got his penis out. Yeah. Logan Paul's giving head. Right.
Starting point is 00:55:11 Nobody gives a fuck about the white boy giving head. Well, he's trending. Let it been the other way around. If the baby was sucking dick. Holy shit. Something point out? What is? Logan Paul.
Starting point is 00:55:30 Let me see this. I don't want to see it. Hold on. There's no way. You're not going to pause that before you watch it. But you got to press. He's tea bagging, too. He's tea bagging.
Starting point is 00:55:41 But you can't tell. He's playing that goddamn Mexican game, Andrew was talking about earlier. Saracho. What do you call that shit? Saracho? What did you say when you slapped to dick over the forehead? Chaudy slap. Chordy slap.
Starting point is 00:55:51 That can't be him. There's no way. There can be him. This is my point. Is this face in that video? It's his chin. He's laying on the bed. Hold on.
Starting point is 00:56:01 It's not him, but he's laying on the bed and his head is hanging off the bed like that. And then there's some guy fucking is, mouth. Okay, the baby video. I didn't see it. What? What about it makes people think it's the baby? What? He was talking in the baby's voice. You can dub that. Yeah, you can't dub that. You can't dub that. Yo, we got to stop that shit with the internet. You know, the internet is going to really, I'm telling you, some Orson Wells, war the world shit is going to happen in 2020. Yeah, yeah. If we don't get a handle on this shit, how do people just see these things and run with it like it's fucking factual? You're right. Yeah, the Orson Wells thing, he said there was an alien attack. He was on the radio saying it was a fucking alien attack. People were killing their self and all types. the dumb shit.
Starting point is 00:56:37 I'm not going to lie to you, bro. If there was an alien attack, I would beat those aliens away with the baby's dick. That's what I would use. That would be the weapon that I have my choice. 100%.
Starting point is 00:56:45 100%. He's like an Avenger, dude. Really? Yeah. Let me see. Curves to the right. That's it? That's impressive to you?
Starting point is 00:56:58 This is the privilege. It's bigger on his feet. This is the privilege of whiteness that I admire the most. It's an angle. That's nice. Out of all the privileges white people have. some dick, bro.
Starting point is 00:57:11 Yo, this dick is literally twice as big as the feet. Out of all the privileges white people have, this is the one that I want the most. Here, look at that. No, forget the cop shit. Forget the cop shit. He's just a dick.
Starting point is 00:57:21 You look at it one every day. Forget getting pulled over by the police and all at and not getting harassed. I want to be able to freely talk about penises. Right. Without being judged. Just do it, dude. You're worthy of it, bro.
Starting point is 00:57:34 You're worthy to talk about dicks. Okay, fill that void. I do. I don't have a problem with it. That shit don't bother me. I don't give a fuck. Look, look, look. I don't want to see that shit.
Starting point is 00:57:45 Hey, look, look. No, I'm cool. Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, I'm cool. Hey, hey, hey, hey, look at that dick right there. Look at that. Look at that day. What can I do to mine?
Starting point is 00:57:56 What do you mean? It's how the angle is. If he's holding it like this, your feet are, like, not going to be. How you're telling us how to take pictures of our dick. Oh, Taylor. Taylor, the dick is quite. That was a dick just now? You saw that?
Starting point is 00:58:11 Because you flashed it up. I'm like, what the fuck? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. What's your thing? Let's play some games now. Did you see it? I saw something.
Starting point is 00:58:27 That was a fucking reindeer antler. One of the goddamn two. I don't know what the fuck that was that was on that shit. That shit looked crazy. The baby, the big dick, Randy. That's the thing. You're just looking at the size of it. You're impressed by the size.
Starting point is 00:58:47 You don't have to like buildings, but you can't... Stop holding that shit up like that. The fuck is wrong with you. You can not look at it. You can't not look at it. It's like a fucking big-ass green safe. Why do you?
Starting point is 00:58:58 Man, what? Like the thing is just bouncing around your screen on your computer just hitting all the sides and bounce. Real talk. Yeah. You stand up. It's going to look. We get it.
Starting point is 00:59:10 You take huge car. Why are you trying to defend yourself? Taylor, it's a big dick. We know we have dicks. I have a perfectly average dick. Say again? Seven inches, three, four, if eight when it's more. That's not average.
Starting point is 00:59:24 You know, that is true. It's like five inches. That is true, because I googled this weekend. Taylor, I don't know what kind of cocks you've been devouring in your life, but you need to stop it. The average size penis is like five and a half inches, I think. That's what Taylor takes down, that thing with all the plugs put in it. The extension cord. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 00:59:41 Is that a normal-sized dick right there? Are you sure? That loaf of pumpernickel that you've been taken down on the weekends? Jesus Christ. Do you know that the smaller your penises when it's flaccid, the bigger it can get when it's hard? That's not true. Ask Asia. Stop, man.
Starting point is 00:59:58 That is a fact. No, it's not. I read that this weekend. I don't know why I googled how to make your penis bigger. I'll tell you why, because you looked at the babies. I don't know why I really don't, but I was reading about it. And they said that when you have a, when you have a, flaccid, when your penis, the smaller it is flaccid, the more blood can get into it to make it
Starting point is 01:00:16 bigger. But the bigger it is flaccid, they said the less bigger it gets and the less harder it gets. I don't know if I completely subscribe to that, but there is, some people do say that black people don't have necessarily bigger dicks, they just have bigger soft dicks. No, I'm definitely a grower. I'm just saying like on average, their dicks are harder, flaccid. Nope, I'm a grower, bro. it evens out.
Starting point is 01:00:42 Nope, on soft, I'm Mark Ruffalo. On hard, I am the Incredible Hulk. Mark Ruffalo guy? Oh, oh, oh, oh, you're using a character. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. He had a big dick. I don't know. I'm just saying.
Starting point is 01:00:50 Yo, yo, yo, who do you think has the prettiest dick? Out of the Avengers? What do you mean? What are you talking about? What do you mean? He's narrow the scope. I mean, there's a lot of pretty sticks out there. Out of the Avengers.
Starting point is 01:01:06 Out of the Avengers. Rocket raccoon hands down. You think the raccoon? Absolutely. A little pink tip like a dog? Absolutely. Rocket raccoon hands down. Why would you say that? You could just tell.
Starting point is 01:01:17 Like why else would an animal wear pants if he didn't have a big dick? So you think he's got a fucking hog? He's just packing. Come on, man. What do you think it's like a cute, like little furry thing like a rabbit foot? When he gets hard, it probably just like, it like peeks out. Like hi. Yes.
Starting point is 01:01:32 Like a little kangaroo in the pouch. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So I would say Rocket raccoon. Rocket raccoon. Yep. Okay. Absolutely. Pretiest pussy of all the Avengers.
Starting point is 01:01:40 Thor, hands down. No question. Why? Look at him. Huh? Look at him. What? Chris Helmsworth?
Starting point is 01:01:49 Yeah, but pussy. You think Chris Helmsworth don't have a pussy? You think you got a pussy? He's way too pretty to have a dick. Chris Hounsworth? Yo. Bro, come on, man. He said he had the hammer.
Starting point is 01:02:01 Well, yeah, he sits on it. Yo, help the white girl in. Help black widow in. All right, let's take a break in the podcast. To tell y'all, it's 2020, almost 2020. All right, and guess what? All that stuff in your home that you didn't use in 2019, it's still there.
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Starting point is 01:03:16 So ringing the new year with less stuff in your home and more money in your pocket with Mercari. That's M-E-R-C-A-R-I. Macari, the selling app. Let's get back to the show. So you didn't see Eddie on SNO? I only saw one sketch. What sketch did you see? It was the sketch where he was, it was kind of a playoff of an old joke of his.
Starting point is 01:03:36 where I seeped it I seeped it He did all his old characters The pool of bears Are coming to eating the elves No that wasn't an old sketch Well it was an old stand-up bit
Starting point is 01:03:47 That he never did in any of his specials But I think he did on an album He released or something And it was about this kid who was like When the TV cameras come around He starts saying what happened He's just exaggerating Making things crazier
Starting point is 01:03:57 The elf eyewitness Which is a playoff to black eyewitness Which black eyewitnesses Are always hilarious But the black He did that years ago. Wow.
Starting point is 01:04:07 Look up right now. I look it up. But the Black Elf eyewitness sketch really shows the level of Eddie Murphy's talent, right? Yeah. Because if anybody else does that sketch, it's probably corny. Right. But he made that sketch funny just off the sheer will of being Eddie Murphy.
Starting point is 01:04:24 You know how they talk about basketball players? Like, you can't beat them just off their sheer will. That thing Michael Jordan had, that thing Kobe Bryant had. Like, that thing they say LeBron doesn't have. He may be developing now, but it's just a will to win. That's what Eddie Murphy has with his talent. Eddie Murphy has that level talent
Starting point is 01:04:42 where he can just will something that's probably a three or four at best turn it into a eight or fucking nine. Easily. It's amazing to see him do it. Listen, I thought he did great on SNL. I think Eddie did the best you could do on SNL. What do you mean by that?
Starting point is 01:05:00 SNL is really not a place where you can go out there and really show your range. of skills. You know what I'm saying? Like, S&L is not the proper showcase for your comedic talent. I don't know. It's like, it's like, it's weird because S&L should be the pros, right? But it's almost like you're in college playing in a system that restricts you kind of. Yes. You know what I'm saying? Yes. And what I thought he did, I thought he did good. You know, I, I have no, I have one, two critiques, right? I thought buckwheat should have been mumbo rappers, right? Because they have buckwheat on the map.
Starting point is 01:05:35 singer. And he did like Beyonce single ladies. Yeah, yeah. Which is like a 10-year-old song. I think buckwheat doing mumble rappers would have been hilarious. So buckwheat doing bad and bougie would have been phenomenal to me, right? I also think that when it comes to comedic acting, Eddie, we see with Dolomite, I have high hopes for coming to America too now.
Starting point is 01:05:58 Him on S&L, incredible. I'm just not sure about the stand-up aspect of it. Ooh. I'm not sure about the stand-up aspect. Talk to me. I just think stand-up is very difficult. You know what I'm saying? And, you know, like, to get back in that stand-up ring right now,
Starting point is 01:06:13 that might be a little tough for Eddie. You know what I'm saying? I think Eddie's, like, he's just so cool. Like, his demeanor is just so cool. Like, I just don't... I don't know. I'm just basing this off what I saw on SNL, the little monologue that he did.
Starting point is 01:06:27 I thought he didn't do a monologue. He did a monologue. He did, like, four or five minutes, and then Chappelle came out, and Tracy Morgan came out, and Chris Rock came out and Keenan came out. But he did a little, my-law. He had a nice little jab at Bill Cosby.
Starting point is 01:06:40 What did he say? He just said, you know, he just talked about the fact that he's here with all 10 of his kids tonight. And, you know, Bill Cosby is in jail. 30 years ago, if you'd have bet me that I'd be here with 10 kids and Bill Cosby would be in jail. I would have took that bet on, you know, on you being right. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But he was like, guess who's America's dad now? You know, and that was a nice little jab.
Starting point is 01:07:02 But I don't know. I don't know if I'm, I don't know if I don't know if, I don't know if Eddie you're still bringing in the stand-up space. That is the only thing that is still to be questioned. But we have no reason to question Eddie Murphy because he's Eddie fucking Murphy. Right. You know what I'm saying? Yeah.
Starting point is 01:07:14 Like we have no reason to doubt that he can go out there and do it. I just know that that stand-up shit, it's tough, bro. It's tough, but it's also like you're dealing with the platform. Mm-hmm. You know, like SNL might be the worst platform for stand-up. Yeah. You know, it's... Especially for what Eddie does.
Starting point is 01:07:32 You know what I mean? And like Eddie once you're, Eddie is animated, right? Once you're in the joke, he creates the scene. He sets the stages for the scene, creates the scene. And then he heightens, heightens, heightens, heightens, heightens. And I think that maybe his greatest skill outside, obviously doing these incredibly good impressions is his ability to heighten the joke. Right?
Starting point is 01:07:51 Most people will leave the joke at the first punchline. He keeps heightening it. Remember back in the do goonigubal, you know, the delirious, she fell down the stairs. You know, all these, everything keeps getting it. Your wife's a Goody Google. You know what I mean? Like she's a big foot, Gus. It just keeps hiding and hiding.
Starting point is 01:08:07 And SNL, a monologue, is often not written by the person itself, right? You have a team of writers. And those writers don't know how to write like Eddie Murphy. They don't know how to create a script like Eddie Murphy, right? They're doing classic set up punchline, one-liner bits that are meant to get an applause break out of cleverness, but not really out of, like, funny. Yeah. You know, so if you unleash Eddie in his style, remember Eddie's jokes? Eddie didn't have one joke that was one minute long.
Starting point is 01:08:36 It might be six minutes, each of his jokes, these pieces, these stories. So I think when we see Eddie do stand up, and don't get him wrong, it's going to take him months to get it right. It's going to take a year probably for him to get it to the point where he needs to be, maybe two. But when we see him do it, we'll see Eddie being Eddie, not a contrive monologue. If I got my executive producer hat on, if I'm on Eddie Murphy's team, I'm not even setting Eddie up for failure like that doing a stand-up. What I'm doing with Eddie Murphy is I'm doing a one-man show. I'm doing what Mike Tyson did when he was on Broadway.
Starting point is 01:09:07 I'm going to put Eddie Murphy up there, and I'm going to have Eddie Murphy go up there, and I'm not even going to have him doing stand-up. I'm going to take away all expectation to have him sitting down. You know what I'm saying? Sitting down to the throne, and he's telling his story of his life. From child, not even, you only got to do childhood.
Starting point is 01:09:27 You can start with childhood, because a lot of things that happen in your, childhood, you know, impact what happened in your adult life. But just telling stories about being Eddie Murphy, the 80s, 90s, icon. It's like Forrest G. Gump. Absolutely. Like, I wouldn't even set them up.
Starting point is 01:09:41 I wouldn't even set him up for standing up. Put him on that stand-a-throat. You have pictures behind him. So, you know, when he's telling his stories and he's doing these bills, because he's really the OG uncle at the holiday dinner. Dude, I think it's telling you these stories when everybody just gathered around. Like, oh, shit. It's a great idea.
Starting point is 01:09:57 Uncle Eddie Ripping. Great idea. I saw him on Fallon, I think it was. I wanted him to late night shows. I think it was Fallon. I don't remember which one it was. But he was telling this story about Marlon Brando. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:10:07 How he went to dinner with Marlon Brando and how Marlon Brando was talking to him about Beverly Hills Cop of 48 hours or something like that. And he was like Marlon seen from him and he goes into this whole thing where he's talking like Marlon Brando. Like, let's do that. Because Mike Tyson's one man play on Broadway. Yeah, it was great.
Starting point is 01:10:24 That Spike Lee did? Incredible. Yeah. And Mike ain't no comedian. But Mike went out. there and he told stories about his life that were funny. Yeah. That were honest.
Starting point is 01:10:32 Yeah. That were emotional. Yeah. So he pulled it all your, your heartstrings. Let Eddie go out there and do the same thing. I think it'll be credible. Neil Brennan, I still say, and over the past decade, and I'm really, really thinking about this,
Starting point is 01:10:47 I still think Neil Brennan has the most genius stand-up special. It won with the three mics. The three mics. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Because he touched everything. It was one mic for regular stand-up. Another mic that was just- I love Neil.
Starting point is 01:11:00 Yeah. I disagree, but I love Neil. Okay. Yeah, yeah. Another mic that was just for straight up Twitter. Yeah. Punch lines, right? And then the other was just straight up emotional shit you would be telling your therapist.
Starting point is 01:11:11 It was, it was a great, unique way to, like, do stand-up. But it wasn't, I don't think Neil would be like, oh, that was better than what Chappelle put out. No, no, I don't mean content-wise. Oh, okay, okay, okay. The execution, the mechanics of it. Right. You did a spin on something that was stand-up. Yes, yes, yes, yes.
Starting point is 01:11:31 And it was successful when people talked about it because of that. People need something to be shaken up. They need something different. Yes. I agree with you in that regard, for sure. The thing with doing a one-man show, which I think lends to what you're saying here is that the expectations are way lower. When you do stand-up, the expectation is to laugh.
Starting point is 01:11:48 So when you're not laughing, the show is failing. Yeah. When you're doing a one-man show, the expectation is not laughter. So when you laugh, it's like, oh, I got to laugh out of this? I just want stories, bro. Here's the thing. And I'm not saying that he's not down to do this.
Starting point is 01:12:02 There is an ego, I'm sure, in a stand-up. When you've done stand-up, which is the hardest, in my opinion, of the performing arts, because there's only one reaction that's tolerable. Laughter. Laughter, there's only one, right? When you've done stand-up,
Starting point is 01:12:16 then I think doing the one-man show, I know there's a lot of guys that do it and they should do it, and their styles lend themselves to it, but on some level they recognize and understand it's an easier thing to do. So maybe Eddie is going, well, I can do stand-up.
Starting point is 01:12:32 I know, you know what I mean? Like, I can do stand-up. Nobody that can do stand-up does the one-man show first. It's often the people that can't do stand-up will go, well, I have a one-man show. When you're Eddie Murphy and you've got the history that he has, the things that we probably don't know about,
Starting point is 01:12:50 the stories we don't know about. I would love it. Pull up the thrones. It'd be more interesting. That's it. Pull up that. throne, sitting at throne like the king you are, and just tell us stories,
Starting point is 01:13:00 Uncle Eddie. 100%. I would much rather that than the stand-up. We know it's going to be funny. We know that we're going to learn from it. We know that it's going to pull it our emotional heartstrings. I would much rather that than put Eddie Murphy out there and say, okay, be funny. By the way, that's the worst expectation in the world. That's why I admire a stand-up
Starting point is 01:13:16 so much, and I would never disrespect that craft, because like you said, there's only one reaction. You got to go out there and make people laugh. If things are coming out of your mouth, and nobody's laughing, you are failing. And you've never felt those beads of sweat grow down the back of your neck like that until you've been on that stage saying some shit and nobody's chuckling.
Starting point is 01:13:38 All right? That is why my favorite thing, which is another thing that I want to do, I think that we have to put out a special of people bombing. I think, no, I'm serious. I think we have to have... How did your guys, Clay, did that? Really? Yeah, right after his biggest special, he'd be.
Starting point is 01:13:56 put out the day the laughter died and it was just a special of him bombing. Really? Yeah, yeah. Chris, you watched that, right? The day the laughter died? No, that is it? Andrew Dice Clay? Or it was an album or something like that, but he's just bombing the whole time.
Starting point is 01:14:08 It was right after he was, when he was the biggest comic in the world? Bro, I would love to do a compilation of the world's greatest bombs. Oh, yeah. That would be so good. By the way, there's nothing funny than failure. It is the truth. Watching other people fail is hilarious. Why do you like to watch videos of people falling off shit?
Starting point is 01:14:26 shit. Oh, yeah. And people running the jump and missing the dumps. Like, that shit is funny. Yo, a compilation of people bombing would be absolutely incredible. Yeah. So we need to, I wouldn't mind putting that together. But we just got to have comedians that are willing to let us share those intimate moments.
Starting point is 01:14:42 Right. And that have them captured. What's wrong with that? And that kind of stuff. Because it's a learning experience, right? The problem is the whole reason you do is special is to advertise yourself so more people come out to your shows. But listen, every comedian is bombed. Right, but nobody's going to come out to someone's show in the future
Starting point is 01:15:00 Because like, man, the way he bombed in his specials? It depends. It goes back to like when you're a human, right? When you're a human being, it's easier to talk about your failures when you have succeeded. So if these comedians have gone on to have massive success, they wouldn't mind showing the times that they failed. Yeah, this is not a come-up story. This is the people, this is like you get Louis, you get Dave,
Starting point is 01:15:19 you get all these people to share videos of their worst sets that they've probably recorded. And then if they do it, you get to see them at their most vulnerable. doing bits that you know work. Yeah. You know, like, yeah, I think there's something there. Yeah. I always wanted to do that.
Starting point is 01:15:33 I was thinking about doing, this is something different, but like, you know, when I put out the special, by the way, we're adding another show to the special is the LA show sold out. So make sure you guys go get tickets for that.
Starting point is 01:15:48 I'd probably already announced it. But the Andrewshoulds.com, pre-sale code is Matador. We're recording this Monday, so I hope everything's confirmed. I haven't fully confirmed it, but I'm hoping when you're listening to this shit, everything is confirmed. Pre-sale code matter.
Starting point is 01:16:00 Go get those. But what were we saying? Oh, yeah. What I want to do is like when I release material, right? Material, not when I'm, you know, messing with the crowd, that kind of stuff, but the actual, like, material that I've been touring. The, you're seeing, like, the finished product of a joke, right? It's about a really fucked up topic and usually takes a really fucked up spin. on that topic.
Starting point is 01:16:28 But when you see it finally released in a special, these types of things, you see the finished product, you see when I worked it out to get people to laugh at this horrible thing. You don't see what it takes to get there. But that's what you do with inside jokes kind of door, right? Inside jokes, we're taught, we talk about it.
Starting point is 01:16:45 But I think there's a world where after I release the special, we release the bits in their infancy when I was just working them out and how much they bomb and people fucking screaming shit and want to throw shit at me, fighting, getting kicked out the club so that people really understand the process of getting to this joke.
Starting point is 01:17:05 Now it's really funny and everybody's having a great time. Earlier, you want to cancel me, you want to fucking write the LP reviews, you want to call the club and say how awful it is. And it's just understanding the process of this is what it takes
Starting point is 01:17:16 to get to hear with the joke. So when you're canceling a comedian, you know what I'm saying? When you cancel a comic for a joke, you don't know what part of the process he's in on. if he says, yeah, that's the finished product, the joke, and it sucks, and it sucks, but I'm sure he's still working on it.
Starting point is 01:17:30 He's still getting better on it. The reason I think that's genius is because I feel like that's something that's just being lost in our society period, like the process because of social media because we're so used to seeing these finished products, right? Right. But, you know, one thing that I would encourage everybody to work on, especially going into a new decade is like understand that there is still a process to shit, right? And I think that that's being, that's been lost. Like, you see, I don't even think people, people don't even show you the beginning no more. They just show you the end, which is some bullshit. Like there is always a process to everything.
Starting point is 01:18:01 Show me how to do this, son. Because when you show me how to do it, then possibly I can do it too. And even if I don't do exactly what you're doing, I understand that there's a process, two things. And I understand, when I'm in those moments where I'm going through that process, I don't feel down on myself.
Starting point is 01:18:15 Y'all talk to so many kids nowadays who deal with anxiety, who deal with depression. A lot of times, they're just getting down on themselves because they're going through the process. and they think that this shit is foreign. Because they don't see nobody else going through it. So they were like, why me? Why is this struggle happening to me?
Starting point is 01:18:31 Nigger, this struggle happened to everybody. Right? You're just going through that process. And I think that we should start showing people that process again. Yeah, take you to the beginnings. Yes, I want to do ask an idiot because before we get up out of here. All right, let's take a break for a second. Pay some bills here.
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Starting point is 01:19:26 with new levels and events so it never gets old. It also does not require internet to play. You hear that? You don't need that Wi-Fi. You just play it. It's already on your phone. You engage your brain with fun puzzles, collect tons of cute characters. Trust me, with over 100 million downloads. This five-star rated mobile puzzle game is a must-play. Download best fiends free on the Apple App Store or Google Play. That's Friends Without the R. Fiends. Go get it. Back to the show. All right, guys, let's take a break for a second. Because we got to talk about the brilliant idiot law firm Morgan and Morgan.
Starting point is 01:20:05 I mean, I'll be honest with you, these guys are more brilliant than they are idiotic. It's a personal injury law firm that fights for the people, not the powerful. If you've been injured in a car crash or other incident, Morgan and Morgan will take on the insurance company so you can focus on getting better. On average, people who hire an attorney after a crash recover three times more than those who don't. Simple as that. These companies will try to pay you the least amount of money they possibly can. And if you get someone fighting for you, you can actually get what you deserve. With 500 attorneys and offices in Florida, New York, and across America, Morgan and Morgan will fight to get you the compensation you deserve.
Starting point is 01:20:43 If you've been injured in a car crash, slip, fall, or on the job, they may be able to help you. Morgan and Morgan has helped thousands of people recover billions, billions. Billions, not millions, billions of dollars. Best of all, hiring them is 100% free unless you win. That means the only way you pay them is if they get you the money. I mean, if that's not incentive, I don't know what it is. So for a free consultation, that's more free, visit for thepeople.com. That's F-O-R-the-people.com forward-slash idiots.
Starting point is 01:21:13 Okay, or dial pound law on your cell phone. That's pound 529. That's for the people.com forward slash idiot for a free. no obligation consultation. There's only one. Morgan and Morgan. Let's get back to the show. Let's get some asking idiots in.
Starting point is 01:21:29 Let's get some asking idiots because this is the end of the year. To make it happen. You better have some good shit, Taylor. We wanted to do asking idiot, and these are the things that we, anything you wanted to ask us all year long. Okay. You have the opportunity to ask us now. Okay.
Starting point is 01:21:50 We should have Taylor read them. Okay, Taylor. Only because it'll give her something to do. I was reading on the YouTube comments one day and somebody said, yo, Taylor got a bubble. So she needs to take all those big ass dicks, bro. And they was like, they was like, it was like, and it was like, and they put the timestamp and when you could see it, right?
Starting point is 01:22:11 So I said, let me go see what the fuck. So I go look at the timestamp. It's literally, it's like a half a second of her walking by. So that means somebody really had to pause that shit. Yup. Y'all. That's how I was with the baby's dick. Okay.
Starting point is 01:22:25 That shit was there for half a second. Pause. Zoom in. You zoomed in to? No. I didn't need to. It's so fucking big. All right.
Starting point is 01:22:35 I actually, I had the better ones on here. Come on, Taylor. This is the last asking idiot of a year. Make sure these shit good. All right. From Fly Kid underscore a name. Ooh, real quick. Before we do this, I want to talk about one thing.
Starting point is 01:22:48 Okay. I saw an absolutely, well we saw an absolutely amazing boxing match this weekend. Oh, man. It was a fighter named Tony Harrison. Yeah, from Detroit. He was the champ who was fighting Jermel Charlo. Rematch. Rematch.
Starting point is 01:23:07 Which from a year ago, which showed you how fast the year goes by, because I swear I saw that fight in January. Last month. They felt like last month. So, disc, and I literally were watching on Alex's phone while we're in Philadelphia. I go on stage, shows in Philadelphia, I get off stage, and it turns out Tony Harrison was knocked out by Jermal Charlo. Before, go.
Starting point is 01:23:32 No, before that, we were in a group chat. We were in the group chat. Talking about how good a fight of Tony Harrison is. Let me tell you something. I reached out to him. I DMed him on Instagram. I reached out to because I really want to help him market himself. This guy is so good at boxing.
Starting point is 01:23:46 And I'm talking about someone who was knocked out. He is so good at boxing. He is one of the most pure intellectual ring IQ boxers I've ever seen in my entire life. It's a good, solid boxer. Solid boxer, but amazing defense, amazing timing, amazing offense, like so strategic. Everything was a chess move, everything's setting up something else. He decided to go right at him, play bully ball with the bully, walked him down. The last fight he was like dancing around, keeping him on the outside, killing him with that jab.
Starting point is 01:24:17 He was doing a little bit, he was doing all of that shit, this fight. to him and he was, in my mind, beating, I told you they were going to wrap him off, because on two of the scorecards you saw, but he was easily beating Charlo. He got caught with a big shot. That left hook, baby. That left hook, and then like four left uppercuts,
Starting point is 01:24:32 he ends up to, and the left hook they exchanged. The left hook is what dropped them in the second round, too. That's right. Yeah. But the left hook they exchanged, and Charlottes were a little bit shorter, and it was amazing. Like, Tony had his hand up blocking,
Starting point is 01:24:42 but the, but Charles... Caught him right on the jaw. It was right on the jaw. But still, some people say the stoppage was even a little bit early, because he was kind of defending himself when he got back up. Nah, they should have stopped the fight after the third knockdown, them four uppercuts in a row. Yeah, they should have stopped that fight, bro.
Starting point is 01:24:58 All right, fair enough. You're going to kill that dude, his next snapback. I'm like, oh, shit. That's possible. You're right. Now, here's the thing. I fucking love this guy as a fighter. He's the type of guy, and I think Van said it's like,
Starting point is 01:25:09 if he had power, he would be the biggest guy in the world. It was you. If he had power, he'd be the biggest guy. Because he is an amazing boxer. No power, though. The power's not there, but his shit. shit talk is also amazing. I think that's what caused him to lose, though.
Starting point is 01:25:23 You know what? Maybe it did. Maybe it was just, he just got caught with the lucky shot. That being said... He got too comfortable. Like, you're still in there with Charlo, who's a former champion. When he was doing all the showboating this shit and doing his little shimmies and acting like... He was acting like Shalow couldn't hurt him. He got too comfy. And he got too comfy.
Starting point is 01:25:37 And he got caught. But here's the thing. His Instagram is made in Detroit 1990. He is a... He's like a... The rawest purest Detroit guy when you see him. As far as boxing goes, Detroit is a... a great history. Obviously, I think Tommy
Starting point is 01:25:51 Hearns from Detroit. I believe so. Right. And the great... Emmanuel Stewart. Yeah, Gronk Jim. Emmanuel Stewart. And that's where he trained out of. This guy is a real fucking deal. I think there's big things for him. I just hope that he can get the marketing angle down
Starting point is 01:26:07 because he has all the town. He has all the shit to talk. And then when he's in the room, he's in the ring, he backs the fuck up. He did get T.K.O. But I think it's one of these things where it's like, all right, dude, you're dealing with a beast in Charlo. Because credit to Charlo. You're You know the beast? Don't ever forget he's a beast. Charlo showed that it's levels to this shit.
Starting point is 01:26:23 There is. And by the way, when you get your belts back, that's how you get your belts back. No disrespect to Anthony Joshua, but getting your belt back by a decision after you got your ass, the way Ruiz waxed you the first fight. And Charlo,
Starting point is 01:26:36 and then Chalo lost the decision. But he came back to show you. This motherfucker shouldn't have been in the ring with me to begin with. Yo, credit to Shala. Credit to Shalom. I would love to see a third fight. I don't think Shallo's people will ever give it to him.
Starting point is 01:26:47 You wouldn't love to see a third fight? That's a lie. You're lying yourself. You're lying. It was a great fight. Why would you not want to see another one? Remember, look at the last text I said. I said, yo, granted a knockdown or a knockout.
Starting point is 01:27:01 Don't be surprised if this goes a draw, because I never thought they would give the fight to Chalo. Don't be surprised if this is a draw and they're the third fight. Then I put, never mind. I saw that text. Because that left when you was like, what happened? He just went down. I'm like, oh, matter of fact, he just went down twice. The ending of that fight, nah, it's no need for a rematch.
Starting point is 01:27:19 No need for remit. I think there's no need for it, but I think we'll have to happen is Harrison will have to, you know, get another belt or become number one contender and then force that rematch. They're not going to offer it to you because you're too dangerous.
Starting point is 01:27:31 Absolutely. But Harrison's a type of fighter where if he don't have a fan base, nobody's going to want to fight him because you cannot look good in front of Harrison, right? Like Harrison is type of guy who's going to make you look bad.
Starting point is 01:27:41 He'll probably beat you. He might not knock you out so it's going to go to the scorecards, so you're not going to see any of the top guys go, shit, I want to fight that guy. You would never want to fight. It's like Winky. right. Remember Winky right? Nobody
Starting point is 01:27:51 wanted to fight Winky Wright. I remember Winky. He didn't have power, but he was an amazing defensive boxer. Get in there, touch you up, and he could win decisions. That's what Harrison's going to have to do. He's going to have to win the shoot on personnel. He's going to have to take something out of the Mayweather playbook. You're going to have to start doing antics. You're going to make wrestling out of the shit. Get big.
Starting point is 01:28:06 I like Harrison. I thought Harrison looked great until he didn't. That's the thing. I thought he looked great until he didn't. That's what happened with it. He lost to Jared at Hayhun. He lost to Jared Hurd. Same way. Harrison? Yeah, and it was like he was boxing him up and all of a sudden he got caught.
Starting point is 01:28:22 I thought he looked great until he didn't, man. That left hook was nasty. Strong guy. And them four left uppercuts in the row was like, God, damn, bro. Like he meant, and it was just, it was just a little lapse in judgment. Yeah. And a lack of focus. That's it.
Starting point is 01:28:37 Like, that's showboating, bro. You're still in there with Charlo. Yeah. Like, you actually still have more to, he had more to prove in this second fight than Charlo did trying to get his belt back. 100%. And he just, he failed that test and dream. dramatic fashion.
Starting point is 01:28:50 So come on back, Tony. We support you. All right, Taylor, let's do it. You need some asking that you're young. Well, I don't know if I can still call you young. How old are you? Younger than you. 28?
Starting point is 01:29:01 What, 28? That's obvious, though. Okay, so that's all that is. Those big ass dicks will age you, yo. Ducking bad vibes, but all you ducking big dick. Can't duck them. She was like a turnstile. Dude,
Starting point is 01:29:19 You jump over him then. Like hopscotch. What is that shit? What is that shit with the ropes? Double dutch. Double dicks. Yo, double dicks would be wild. All right.
Starting point is 01:29:31 That means when you get the train ran on you by two people with baby-sized dicks. All right, go ahead. All right. From high kid, underscore named underscore cam. He wants to know what's your biggest troll moment of 2019. biggest troll moment I haven't done no trolling this year
Starting point is 01:29:50 not that I haven't done no trolling this year I mean just because you think it was a troll moment don't mean that it was trolling Like when you get excited when you do your little shoulders I can't think of an exact one But I've seen you do shoulders a lot I've had no troll moments this year I've had moments why I've purposely done things
Starting point is 01:30:08 to piss people off That's being a troller No that's not trolling Um Hearing something that somebody said about me and them not knowing that I know they said it and constantly repeating it around them. And that's what they're saying.
Starting point is 01:30:23 I guess somebody says, I'm like, oh, Shalaman thinks things are all about him. So I constantly, yeah, it's all about me. You know, it's all about me, baby. That's right. It's all about me. You know? Who did you do that too?
Starting point is 01:30:33 Yeah, it doesn't matter. But what do you all think has, who has been the biggest troll then? What this year? Yeah, this year. I don't know. I'll be honest, I don't know. I'm not sure, but I don't love this question.
Starting point is 01:30:43 Move on. Okay. Let's see. I know for a fact that people had questions for us all 2019. I need some good shit, Taylor. Give me the questions, Taylor. You know, is this fucked up? We tried.
Starting point is 01:30:59 We tried to give you an opportunity. Try to get you to earn your fucking money. Jesus Christ. Taylor. Look at the questions she picks. What do you guys think about? No, this is a good question people can learn from. Can I show you a horrible one?
Starting point is 01:31:12 Tell me. What do you guys think about cats? Oh, my God. Next level painting This is funny though Next level painter says Man I think Charlam ain't lying About how big his dick is
Starting point is 01:31:24 Motherfuck is only 5 too Says he's 8 inches That's like a whole third of your body Just stop lying Uncle Shala Like that's what you got That's what you're thinking about my G? Okay You know that's how you can become six feet
Starting point is 01:31:34 Just put your dick on the top of your head This is a good one At Ish underscore Mel says How do you shit in a public bathroom Hashtag Hemie? He meant to put Hezzi Nobody shits in public places better than Andrew. A hemorrhoid.
Starting point is 01:31:49 Oh. So how I shit is I always go cheek to bowl. The fuck is that? Cheek to pull. I put my cheeks directly on the bull. I don't believe in putting paper down on the toilet seat. I wash the toilet seat first with some toilet paper. Okay?
Starting point is 01:32:06 If the toilet seat is really peed on, I'll put some water on the paper, wash it down, then do another wash with more toilet paper to dry it. Then I go cheek to pull. But I always go cheek to pull. I love cheek to bowl. I need to go cheek to bowl. You like the feeling that porcelain on your cheeks? I like the porcelain on the cheeks. I like the connection I get at like warming up the seat. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You're not afraid of like catching anything? No, I haven't caught anything so far. What do you catch in your butt besides, you know, AIDS?
Starting point is 01:32:33 I don't think AIDS is real. Taylor did say, you did say that Taylor. Horrible segue. I don't think AIDS is real. Why Magic Johnson got y'all really thinking that shit? Lord have mercy No, the toilet The dirty toilet I don't think that's real What do you mean?
Starting point is 01:32:50 Because they try to say you could get disease From toilet dirty toilet seeds I don't think that's real Hold on you watch your chicken But not your toilet seats I do watch Go go lick the toilet in the eye heart bathroom right now
Starting point is 01:33:01 If it's so sanitary Next question I like this one Hail Giff Says is there a certain goal That brilliant idiot's flagrant two Are trying to reach Besides just giving out free gems
Starting point is 01:33:15 And expressing your own opinions Is there a certain goal? Yes. Yeah, sure. But, I mean, that is the main goal. It's just about enjoying a conversation and talking about the things that they say that we can't talk about. I mean, that's really what Flagarin 2 is all about is just having those conversations and making those jokes. The purpose of Flagrant 2 is a space to make the jokes that we would make when we're with our friends, but do it publicly.
Starting point is 01:33:41 And just create some normalcy in this time where you can get canceled for everything. So we're basically like, no, fuck it. We're going to lean into it. I don't think that there's a goal. For me, it's just like, yeah, creating a safe space or unsafe conversation, unsave people, you know? I think that's when, that's when shit gets fucked up when you are sitting around having a conversation
Starting point is 01:34:00 like it's just you and your folks and the people that you invite over. And then all these other motherfuckers who ain't even, who don't even got a fucking invitation. You know what I mean? Peep in and come into the middle of a conversation. Like, what the fuck they're talking about in there? Shut that shit down.
Starting point is 01:34:15 You don't have to press play. You don't have to fucking press play. Nobody invited you. Yeah. I think, by the way, I think that shit is dead. What's that? I think that whole cancel culture shit is dead. Yeah, I hope so.
Starting point is 01:34:25 I really do. No, I really do. I really think that we've gotten to a place where people realize how corny that shit is. Yeah. For you just to be trying to shut motherfuckers up for a, what they say or B, what they've said. Yeah. Do you worry about that? No.
Starting point is 01:34:41 What's your upcoming special coming? No. Do you worry about them digging up old shit? Yeah, I mean, probably. You know, I'm sure they'll do. do it, but it is what it is. Who gives the fuck? I don't care because what I've realized about these
Starting point is 01:34:51 pussies is that they only do it, they don't care about me. What they care about is getting these big corporations to bend to their whim. Yeah, it's people that have no power anywhere else. Trying to. And this is the first time they can feel like they've got a big dick. Exactly.
Starting point is 01:35:06 They finally being hurt. They can't flex power on me. Like, the reason they don't come from me now is because who they're going going to cancel me from myself? I put out all my own shit. So when I do it for the network, I'm sure someone's going to try to do something, whatever. And that's just up to the network to man up.
Starting point is 01:35:20 But if the network don't, real talk. Let's think about it. Let's say you cancel my special and it don't come out, right? Thank you. You just made my special the most coveted special. Absolutely. And now you can lose TK. And now you can lose TK and sell it for $2.
Starting point is 01:35:38 Or wherever the fuck it is. Whenever we go, all I'm saying is, you just gave me the marketing platform. Oh, you canceled my special before it came out because it was too crazy? Well, we got to see what the special is all about. So my way, I don't worry about it. You know what's wild about that? I want to encourage all,
Starting point is 01:35:50 all potentially, all creatives with potentially dangerous rhetoric. Just make sure you got a small little clause in your contract that says if they want a motherfucking cancel you for some shit that you said publicly already. I don't give a fuck if it's on social media. I don't give a fuck if it's on a podcast on a radio. Let's make sure you got a small clause in your contract
Starting point is 01:36:09 that they got to pay you anyway because they should have vetted you a little bit better. That's it. You know what I'm saying? Simple as that. Okay, Gazzo's Papi It's clearly one of waxes His girlfriends
Starting point is 01:36:20 She says what's the most romantic gift for wax A new pair of Thames are a new pair of gloves Who is this? I don't know I think he's got a lot of those Who could this possibly be? I'm looking at Gazos Papi And it's clearly one of his
Starting point is 01:36:38 Latino women pretending to be a man In this situation Because you know wax don't talk to black women We got to have that conversation in 2020 Whoa We got to have that conversation in 2020 No, no, no
Starting point is 01:36:52 What is she? Domenico? That's not Afro-Cuban. Or Afro-Latino? You know I can't tell them my part What are they? Latino She likes Jennifer Lopez, that's what I know
Starting point is 01:37:01 But Afro-Latino I thought they get to be black Okay, she is that did So then she's black? Yes, yes, she's Afro-Latina Okay, so he likes black women So I would tell you, Miss Afro-Latino Probably a new pair of Tims.
Starting point is 01:37:13 Probably get them both For new pair of Tim's a new pair of gloves. That's not expensive either. Yeah, don't be cheap. Give them the combo pack. Take one glove, put it in one Tim. Put the other glove, put it in the other Tim. Give him a little combo pack.
Starting point is 01:37:23 Okay? Can I tell you one? Yeah. Yes. J-O-N-T-E underscore Berggrin. He wants to know, what's your crazy experience together? You got to. What's our crazy experience together?
Starting point is 01:37:37 Yeah. What's a story that no one knows about you guys? That nobody knows? Remember that one time? we were videotaping the baby's dick together. I don't remember that one. And then we released it for viral content. You don't remember that?
Starting point is 01:37:51 That's crazy. That angle you had, though, you was on his shoulder. I know, dude, I did. That's crazy.
Starting point is 01:37:56 You know, you were stating on his security Kong shoulders. Yeah. You had the camera down. Yeah. Yeah, I was like, who's the baby now?
Starting point is 01:38:06 Okay, there's a better way. You're annoying. This just reminded me why we don't do asking these. Y'all was shit. I have one and have them ready. For you. Sharming, Muggle underscore mind underscore motives wants to know, do you think the conversation
Starting point is 01:38:19 of mental health can have a negative effect? No. I've got a conversation about something positive and encouraging people to go get help for something ever have a negative effect. Like, how I was encouraging brothers to go get therapy to practice mindfulness to, you know, get into exercises like meditation, you know, how could that ever possibly have a negative effect? How?
Starting point is 01:38:44 Don't answer the question for him? You just have to question. Like, Taylor, why you, how can it have a negative effect? Because this is what I was thinking about with mental health, though, because what if, like, when you go to therapy, isn't it not give you sometimes negative effect? Like, it's like you revisit. But that.
Starting point is 01:38:58 That's part of healing. You got to go through that. You're going to go through that. You're going to have those break-throughs where you're crying and you're thinking about, you know, wild shit that happened to you. Like, you have to go through that. You cannot heal what you don't reveal. Didn't Jay-Z tell you up?
Starting point is 01:39:10 Yeah, but you think that it's just to basically when you go to the gym, do you know what the process of going to? You know what the gym is, Taylor? Huh? You know what the process of working out is and lifting weights? Do you know what happens? Yeah.
Starting point is 01:39:21 What happens is you tear the muscle. And when you tear the muscle, you give the muscle the opportunity to rebuild itself. And when it rebuilds itself, it rebuilds itself much stronger so that it doesn't tear from that type of impact in the future. It's a process. It's like when you're in the head salon
Starting point is 01:39:37 and they're taking that weave out. You know what I'm saying? When you're taking braids out, how fucked up does your head look in between? Boom. Putting that new shit in. 100% Like I'm serious
Starting point is 01:39:46 That's all it is Would you want Would you want to stop at that process? No but I just think that sometimes Maybe some people take it as a negative As in like they don't want to revisit it Is your new growth negative? No
Starting point is 01:39:58 Is the new growth under your hair negative? Huh? No Okay so you take that old shit out And then you get it done And you put the new shit in I'm giving you a hint here, Taylor All right?
Starting point is 01:40:10 Yeah, shut out because first of all You just got it done All right, this is the last question. Then we got to wrap this. Yes. What is the most valuable lesson you guys learned this year? This is from Walking Canvas 1. The most valuable lesson you guys learned this year.
Starting point is 01:40:29 Invest in yourself. It has the highest return. 100%. Simple as that. Invest in yourself. It has the highest return. The most valuable lesson I learned this year is what I told you all at the beginning of the podcast. I am worthy.
Starting point is 01:40:43 every every every every position that I've put myself in everything I've attained you know even even the family and friends that you have around you because that's all energy right like you have to be putting out a certain energy to get that kind of energy back
Starting point is 01:40:57 like you build your team based on what kind of person you are so when I look at all the great people around me I look at my beautiful wife my beautiful daughters I have earned that so the most value and I am worthy of that so that is the most valuable
Starting point is 01:41:12 lesson that I have learned this year. I am worthy. So I encourage you all to get to worthy. And in the process, because if you don't think you're worthy right now, just know that God thinks you're worthy. And that is enough to keep you motivated and get you through until you actually feel your worthy. All right? God bless. I want to tell you all, happy holidays. Merry Christmas. Happy Hanukkah. Happy Kwanza. I don't know what you atheists. What do you atheists do? Nothing, right? Christmas probably.
Starting point is 01:41:42 All right. Everybody does Christmas. You want them fucking gifts, bro. No, that's the genius branding of not having Jesus in it. Is the holiday becomes ubiquitous. But it's not if it's Christmas. Yeah, but if you don't have Jesus all over it, then other people can go, ah, it's Christmas, let's celebrate Christmas.
Starting point is 01:41:59 Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Let's get a Christmas tree. There's no fucking pine trees in Jerusalem. Yeah, so you say Xmas. You say X-Mis. X-Mis. Why do they do that? I have no idea.
Starting point is 01:42:08 Why is Christ an X? I have no idea. Listen, as always, If you listen to this podcast, you look to this podcast, you think we're smart, you think we're intelligent, you think we're brilliant, you're absolutely right. If you listen to this podcast, you think we're just a couple idiots who don't know shit, you're right, too. It's the brilliant idiots podcast.
Starting point is 01:42:24 Thank you for listening. God bless. This episode has been brought to you by Margari. Mercari! Now that the new year is here, it's time to deal with all this stuff you've never used. Sell it, okay? Sell it on Mercari. Mercari's a selling app that makes it fast and easy to sell almost anything.
Starting point is 01:42:40 Just take a few picks out of description. Boom! Your item is listed. Ring in the new year with less stuff in your home and more money in your pocket with Mercari. That's M-E-R-C-A-R-I. Mercari, the selling app.

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