The Broski Report with Brittany Broski - 35: I’m Joining The Air Force

Episode Date: February 6, 2024

This week on The Broski Report, Fearless Leader Brittany Broski considers medieval torture, talks about meeting Kamala Harris, dissects her relationship with the church, moves Broski Nation to an underground base, discusses famous 80s rock bands, and learns German. 👕 Get your merch here: https://broski.shop/ Follow The Broski Report:https://www.linktr.ee/broskireporthttps://www.tiktok.com/@broskireport https://instagram.com/broskireport  Follow Brittany: https://www.tiktok.com/@brittany_broski  https://instagram.com/brittany_broski  https://youtube.com/brittany_broski Follow Royal Court:https://www.tiktok.com/@bbroyalcourthttps://www.instagram.com/royalcourthttps://www.twitter.com/bbroyalcourt  Brought To You By:Tinder – Download the app nowSeat Geek – Use code BROSKI at https://seatgeek.com/mobile for $20 off first purchase Factor – https://factormeals.com/broski50 and use code BROSKI50 for 50% off your first box and 2 free wellness shots per box, while the subscription is activeSongs of The Week:I Knew You When by Linda RonstadtYou Light Up My Life by Whitney HoustonWhen You Believe by Whitney Houston & Mariah CareyCountry Boy’s Dream Girl by Ella LangleyStockholm Syndrome by Muse#brittanybroski, #broski, #broskination, #broskireport, #medieval, #kamalaharris, #religion, #topgun, #lindarondstat, #whitneyhouston, #mariahcarey, #ellalangley, #rush, #gunsnroses, #acdc, #aerosmith, #80srock, #germany

This episode is brought to you by Progressive Insurance. Fiscally responsible, financial geniuses, monetary magicians. These are things people say about drivers who switch their car insurance to progressive and save hundreds, because Progressive offers discounts for paying in full, owning a home, and more. Plus, you can count on their great customer service to help you when you need it, so your dollar goes a long way. Visit Progressive.com to see if you could save on car insurance. Progressive Casualty Insurance Company and Affiliates, potential savings will vary, not available in all states or situations. Direct from the Broski Nation headquarters in Los Angeles, California. This is the Brozky Report with your host, Brittany Broski.

Actually, what would my WWWWWWWK out be? My WWWK out would be Or this muse song I've been obsessed with lately. Stockholm syndrome or Uprising by Muse. How does that song go? They will not break a we will. We'll be victorious. That would be my walkout song.

Hey guys, welcome back to the Rosie Gear Report. I feel fucking crazy. Guys, a lot to talk about today. Okay, we're going to be jumping all over the place. Don't really, I'm going to apologize up front for the things that I'm going to talk about. I'm also going to tell you right now, what am I sipping on? We're sipping. Listen to that.

Yeah, we're sipping on a half sweet, half-unsweet ice tea in my fuzzies taco shop cup. Okay? What's it say on here? It's taco clock somewhere. I know that's fucking right. Okay? You know my latest sort of like, what do you all call it? Vocal stem of the week?

The thing that I walk around my house saying is, well, all we can do is pray for. It applies to anything. It's the new bit. If someone's doing really bad or someone's doing really well, it's, well, all we can do is pray for that Theo Vaughn clip. I don't know if Theo Vaughn, the girls like him, right? I've always thought Theo Vaughan is hilarious, but I don't know if he's problematic. So, what are we talking about today? First of all, some housekeeping.

Brosky report merch is still live. Go get it, guys. If you want it, go get it. It ships out the week of April 1. because it's made to order. So go get that. Now, next order of business. I was on the pit stop.

I was on the pit stop with Trisha Martel, my sister in Christ, my brother in arms, and we just had a good old time, didn't we? It's always your Trish. When I get to see my sister, Trish. I love her. I love Trish. You know, whenever someone comes up to me in person,

they're like, I love you and Trixie Mattel. I'm like, well, she's really hard to look at, but she is sure fun to be around. they're like, I'm not joking. You ever looked at her? Yeah, try sitting across from her. Katia is a god warrior. Katia is a warrior of God.

All right? We don't talk about it enough. I love Trisha. We did pit stop. It was so much fun. I cannot believe queens get paid to do that. That is the ideal job. You get paid to sit around and watch drag race.

Yeah, bitch. To sit around watch drag race and give your opinion. Yeah, bitch. Sign me up. I told Tricky then I was like, the girls are going to literally like quarter and, what's that called? Draw and quarter? Draw and quarter definition.

To be hanged, drawn, and quarter became a statutory penalty for men convicted of high treason in the kingdom of England from 1352 under King Edward the Third, although similar rituals. Hey, don't care. Don't care what they're. the fuck is the definition. Draw and quarter is a medieval expression that refers to two brutal forms of execution. Execution by horses.

Tying each, ooh, we should implement some of these in brusky. Execution by horses. Tying each of the victim's limbs to a different horse and then driving the horses in four different directions. You know that that ASMR was crazy. Damn. King Edward had some crazy ASMR. Sorry.

Execution by hanging. Hanging the victim, disemboweling them? and then beheading and dismembering them. Oh! Right. Oh, holy fuck. Oh, Jesus Christ! Literally means cutting the person's body into four parts or quarters.

Oh! Right. The punishment was considered one of the most brutal and inhumane forms of execution. Well, yeah, I could definitely see that being sort of the case there. Oh my god. Have y'all ever been to a medieval torture museum? Very, very niche ask. Have y'all ever been to a medieval torture museum? Let me tell you something.

It's crazy. It's bonkers. Okay? I think we should bring back some of those. We should bring back some of those for just like really petty crimes. Not like stealing from Walmart or stuff like that. That's sort of like, ah, you got me. You know what I mean?

I don't think stealing from Walmart is worth like drawing and quartering, but something as simple as like, okay, this is a thing in California, and I don't know if this is a thing anywhere else in the fucking continental United States to merge onto the highway. There is a stoplight. Like you get on the feeder road, the access road,

and you stop. Like you fully are about to merge onto the highway, then you stop. And I think it's to control the traffic flow of, so it's not bottlenecking, and so it doesn't like back up into the actual street, like crossroad streets. But it's so fucking stupid!

Because you think people actually sit there and do that shit? No, girl! They blow right through that bitch. They are not stopping. And I, I, because I'm like, it's gonna be me. Oh, I have that fucking curse on me. If I do this and I follow suit and I just blow through this light, guess who's getting a fucking ticket, girl?

Me. My dumb ass. And I'm gonna get sent that picture of me in the driver's seat. Just blowing through it. listening to Meg the Stallion, level 28 volume, maxing out my speakers, hands on 10 and 2, blowing through it. Did anyone else get a ticket? No. Just me.

If you blow through those lights, I think you should be drawn and quartered. Because it, like, you are defeating the purpose. I think, honestly, if the light worked, if people actually abided, abode by the rules, and they were able to merge onto the highway in a way that actually, you know, monitors and and regulates the traffic flow maybe it would work. Okay? It doesn't. Oh my God, completely

separate thing yesterday. I was driving to Brooke Averick, Averick, Lady Efron's podcast release party. Her podcast is out, I believe, today. And I'm the first episode. Y'all go give it a watch. That's my sister. I love her. It's called Obsessed. Her new podcast called Obsessed, of course. Because of course it is. Like one thing about

me and Brooke that we have in common. We don't know how to like something normal. And I think she really embodies that. I'm so excited about the podcast. Anyway, I was on the way to, she had a little trivia night. It was a Brooke-themed trivia night. It was Criminal Minds, Akitar, Glee, and Broadway. Those were the fucking categories.

Akatar, of course. I won for my little group. They were like, we haven't read. Yeah, I know you bitches haven't read. You bitches can't read. I will be the fountain of information, the fountain of knowledge. on Akitar, you can bet on me for that. I'm on my way there.

It was in Santa Monica, and I'm driving there, and I'm headed... This is about to be the most California sentence I've ever, and trust me, it hurts coming out. I'm like, ugh, saying this. I'm headed south on the 405, okay?

It's like a windy highway through the mountains. On the opposite side of the highway headed north, there is a police lineup. of like, I'm not joking, probably 15 to 20 cop cars. It's spearheaded by three, and then behind those three are two stretch limousines with American flags up front, like the little flags that they, and they're going super slow,

which I'm just like, why the fuck would you do? Just take a fucking helicopter. Oh, you bitches are so annoying. And I'm like, oh, my God, who do you think that could be? Is it Obama? Is it Trump? Is it? you're maiden.

Or is it like a senator or a congressman or whoever? And if that's the case, why wouldn't you just fly? Why are we driving? Why do we have two stretch limousines and a fucking 30 police car police escort? Stopping traffic on a Wednesday night. Oh, you bitches. And so I look over and I'm like, oh, holy shit. If it's not presidential, then it's something.

Time to find out. I call my mother, because I'm driving. I call my mother and I say, can you Google something for me? She's like, yeah, what's going on? I was like, there is an escort happening on the foreman. 405 right now, so we're in SoCal. Can you look up on Twitter or somewhat like, who's here? Turns out, it was

the Veep. It was Kamala Harris. Kamala Harris. Welcome to SoCal. SoCal, the best cow, we like to call it. SoCal best cow, the fancy cow, I love SoCal. I live in SoCal. I was like, oh, holy shit. Drove by Kamala Harris. Okay?

We did it, Joe. Did it show? I wonder if she could hear me blasting Megan the stallion from my car. Kamla! Woo! Okay, bye, girl. I'll see you, girl. Okay, I don't know where you're going. Okay. If y'all were headed that way, I passed the canes earlier.

Y'all stop at that, Keynes. All right, love you. I'll see you, girl. Okay. That was me on the 405. Oh, my God, Kamala, you did not. Tell me you were passing me. Well, no, I can't talk. No, I would love to her.

No, no, don't stop the car. Okay, stop the car. Wait, no, I'm headed to Santa Monica. Yeah, I'm doing, you know, bro. Yes, yes. And her pot, yes! So that actually comes out tomorrow. I'm the first episode.

Oh, call me, you are too sweet. KK. We like to call her KK. KK.H. Kamala Kardashian, if you will, we like to call her that too. I said, Kamala, you are so sweet. No, please, I have to go. I really can't stay another minute.

I've got to hit the road. Yeah, y'all were blocking traffic. Y'all are crazy over there. Okay. Besitos. Bye, KK. That was me on the 405 with her. Anyway, crazy.

These politicians are just, I always think, I don't know why I don't think that they're like going to be driving on the highway. I don't know. Well, she wasn't, of course. Someone was driving her. But I was like, whoa, that's the first time I've ever seen like a presidential-esque escort. And just, they were just on the road. And of course, they stopped traffic. So it was the three police cars, the two stretch limousines.

I wonder if anyone was with her. And then like, I'm not joking. 15 cop cars behind her. And one of them was doing like a serpentine. thing, like the very last one at the very end of the procession, and I think it was so no one would try to like rush up next to the cop cars or like speed up and, you know, I don't know, people are crazy, whatever they'd try to do. I was like, damn, that's crazy. There's like a protocol for this shit. You can't just be like, all right, let's get in the Tahoe.

All right, Kamala, let's get in the Tahoe. Pick it up. Let's go. Anyway, that's what I'd do. If Kamala Harris was staying at my house, I'd be like, Kamala, we were supposed to leave 15 minutes ago. get your ass in that car. We've got to go. We don't have time to stop at Keynes anymore. I told you if you want to stop at Keynes, we got to leave 15 minutes early. That line is damn long.

Get in the... Well, we don't have time. Oh, I don't give a shit that you're hungry. Hopefully they have Reese's P.C.s at the town hall. Lord knows you took your sweet time. Anyway, drawing and quartering was in 1305. The Scottish rebel William Wallace was hanged, drawn, and quartered

for being a traitor to King Edward I. Damn, so this dude had a punishment invented for him. That's fucking crazy. Damn. He was like King Edward was to just, oh, I fucking hate to. Okay, hear me out. What if we got four horses?

And we tied this motherfucker to the horses, and we said, and they ran. Yeah. Okay, what if we did that for everything? Anyway, I think we should introduce drawing and quartering and a broskey nation,

but for like really, really heinous like not deserving crimes, but also it's a joke. Like, we'd strap you to stuff and I'd be like, any final words on my little throne in front of the town square? You'd be like, please, please. And I was like, ah, I'm just joking. All right, untie him, untie him. It was a joke.

It was a prank. Drawing and cordering someone is a prank. Holy shit. Jake Paul Corp. It was a prank. Okay. What the fuck was I talking about drawing and quartering for? Oh, why did I get there from Pittstop?

Yeah, Pittstop was a lot of fun. The reaction has been really, really nice. Everyone who's sent me messages or all the comments on the video are like really, really sweet. And I'm like, you know, because I was talking to Trixie beforehand and I was like, I feel really nervous being on a show like Pitstop. Because anytime someone who's, you know, on the show who isn't a question, or who doesn't do drag in some capacity or is associated with the drag world, they're kind of discounted, you know, like, why the fuck are you there?

Which I totally understand. What opinion could you possibly share that could be constructive or helpful in any sense? I totally understand. But as a longtime fan of drag race, I mean, I told Trixie on the show, I've been watching drag race since season four, season six. I started at season six, and then I went back and watched. And then I've been caught up ever since. but it's like that was a part of my literal childhood.

I was a sophomore in high school. Drag race has been a part of my life for a really long time. And I don't, I mean, when it comes from the perspective of a fan, I think that that is relatable in a sense, you know, where it's nice to see two queens talk about drag race and they obviously have the inside scoop where they can relate to or say, well, in my experience, you know, this was kind of the experience on the show. But as a fan of the show, it's fun to just also with like one of my besties.

like to sit there across from Trixie and be like, yeah, girl, I live for Plain Jane, I live, you know, it was really just fun. I mean, it's a fucking blast. This job is stupid and it's not real. So that was kind of a dream. Come true, and I think she's doing a great job as the host. That is not an easy gig. I mean, to kind of lead that conversation totally from the ground up.

And obviously, they have a structure that you kind of need to follow, but there's a lot of pickups and there's a lot of, you know, television is just not as natural and easy as you may think. television against all odds, sometimes it's scripted. Okay. I hate to burst the bubble. Anyway, thank y'all, because the reaction on Pitsuff's been really, really great. This episode is brought to you by Progressive Insurance. Fiscally responsible, financial geniuses, monetary magicians.

These are things people say about drivers who switch their car insurance to progressive and save hundreds. Because Progressive offers discounts for paying in full, owning a home, and more. Plus, you can count on their great customer service to help you when you need it, so your dollar goes a long way. Visit progressive.com to see if you could save on car insurance. Progressive Casualty Insurance Company and Affiliates. Potential savings will vary, not available in all states or situations. Hi, everyone. This is Mariah Rose, co-host a full circle and the creator behind Hoops for Hotties.

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This is a job for Indeed's sponsored jobs. Okay, here are the three songs of the week. I kind of want to get into it early just because it's on my mind. Okay? And kind of in the vein of drag race. Not even in the vein of drag race, in the vein of Trixine Katia. One of my songs of the week is going to be by Linda Ronstad.

One of my songs of the week. week is going to be, you are lonely. I've gotten a bunch of, for some fucking reason, Linda Ronstad videos on my For You page, and I eat every single one up. I get Old Cher,

I get Linda Ronstad, I get the Mamas and Pappas, I get Dolly, of course, Dolly and Porter Wagner. I get old Johnny Cash, I get old Hank Williams, I get a lot of, and then like every now and then

it'll be like, Mariah Carey's best voluble. local moments. And I'm like, fuck yeah. And then I'll sit there and watch the nine minute long TikTok of, okay, Celine Dion, Mariah Carey, Whitney Houston, who you got. And I'm like, that's an impossible choice, but I'll sit here and I'll make the choice. Oh my God, it is so sad what's happening to Celine Dion. Her, like, health. Celine Dion's sister says singer doesn't have control over her muscles. Oh my God. Grammy winner and international icon Celine Dion is working hard, but doesn't have control over her muscles.

Her sister Claudette has told Canadian media. Dion earlier this year canceled all toward H22024 due to a rare neurological disease called stiff person syndrome. That is so sad. In our dreams and hers, the goal is to return to the stage in what capacity, I don't know. The vocal cords are muscles and the heart is also a muscle. This is what gets me.

It's a one out of a million case. The scientists haven't done that much research because it hasn't affected that many people. Oh my God, that fucking sucks. That is one of my biggest fears about getting older and aging. I'm not so much afraid of age. I'm afraid of the health risks and the health, the deteriorating health that comes with age. You know, like I am acutely aware of my sort of lack of activity, my lack of dedication

to living a healthy lifestyle. I am not looking for a lecture. I'm not looking for advice. I'm simply just relaying this information to you all. I understand it's so important to wake up and stretch every morning and do vitamins and walk and move your body and, you know, core strength and all this. I totally understand it's a lot easier said than done. Also, when I've struggled with an eating disorder my whole life, it's just, you know, it's a lot more fucking hard than it should be for no reason. Because I guess I make it harder, my brain.

I don't know. And that's one of the things, especially in my family, cancer of all types runs in my family, high cholesterol, high blood pressure, just an evil concoction of things that just sucks. And it's stuff like this where it's like, could Celine Dion have done anything to prevent this? No, it happens. And that fucking sucks too. And that's the shit not to get super deep, not to get deep. But allow me.

Indulge me for a second. that's the stuff that'll make you religious. Because I know in my family there have been divine healings. And I say that, of course, with a grain of salt, because was it divine healing or was it, you know, the body's ability to regulate itself? Was it prayer? I don't know. My relationship with God and the church is what it is. But I don't know.

I think there is something to be said about miraculous. healings that cannot be explained. I know it happens. I know a lot of people have stories of it happening. I never would, you know, rule that out. But it is situations like that where when it comes to someone's health, that is a situation where it is completely out of your hands. Your faith is in the doctors and beyond that, you know, it sucks because there's a sort of wall there of you don't understand it. You don't understand the medical side of why this could happen, how it could have been preventable, how to treat it, oh, there's no treatment. It's hopelessness.

It's how do you even fathom powering through this and being able to emotionally get through this both as the patient and as the family of the patient or the friends of the patient. It is a stress that only if you've lived through it, you understand it. And, you know, it's situations like that where I come on here and I talk a lot about my relationship with the church and how I feel as a young woman

it did me dirty and it left me reeling. I hope that through those conversations and through those opinions that I've shared, I never want to seem like I'm shitting on someone's religion because religion is such a deeply personal thing and it's a cultural thing and it is so deeply ingrained. And I think that there is a separation between being able to say, okay, this element of religion and man-made religion and religious practices can be harmful. But on the other side, if that helps you make sense of the world and it helps you connect to hope,

human hope is such a fragile but strong thing, then I think that is beautiful. And I always come back to the point that a lot of, you know, I'm not saying I'm an atheist, but a lot of atheists come to this point of I envy the faithful because of that, you know, blind hope. And for some, it's not a blind hope. It's, it is faith.

That's what it's called. That's the definition. It's faith. And I've seen it and I've had it and I've lost it. And in situations like that where your family member or you, you're going through a medical emergency that has you literally lifting your hands to the sky and being like, please help me. Please. Anyone.

Anything. Help me. Take away the pain. Take away the pain for, you know, whoever is suffering. that is when religion is, I mean, it's truly the last, like, it's a Hail Mary. And in that regard, I am so sympathetic to that, and I am so, I've been there and I understand it, and I've watched it work and I've watched it fail. And I don't really have a definitive opinion or answer on it, but it is just one of the most tragic.

I see a lot of comments on, this got really serious all of a sudden, sorry, guys. I see a lot of comments on the podcast, on the YouTube, where a lot of y'allel have said, you know, you've recently experienced a death in the family or a death of someone very close or you've just not been doing well mentally. You're in the hospital, God forbid. And this podcast helps with that. I think that is so, what an honor for me to sort of take your mind off of it, you know, because I've, God, I've been there where you're just waiting. Waiting on someone to get better is just indefinite, stressful waiting. and when you finally get the news, it's this rush of adrenaline.

It's just, it's awful. And so my heart goes out to anyone who's currently dealing with that. I mean, back to Celine Dion, it's just like, I can't imagine to be. And when it happens to athletes too, you know, where it's like your skill, your talent, your gift that you have given to the world is how you use your body, how you use your muscles, how you use your voice. When that capability is stripped from you, I cannot have. imagine how crippling that feels. You know, like, you have to learn how to interact with the world

and express yourself in a completely different way. And I just, that's one of the most, you have to be so strong and it's so heart-wrenching. My heart really goes out to Celine Dion and her family. I can't imagine. And what an icon. What a fucking icon. Who's done it like Celine Dion? Very, very few have done it like Celine Dion. And I know she knows that. I at least I hope she knows that she is a literal living legend. And she has left her mark on humanity. You know, so that's just wow. Back to the music. Oh, a Whitney Houston song. Oh, Linda Ronstad. I was talking about Linda Ronstad. I knew you win. The second one is Whitney Houston. You light up my life. This song has been on repeat. Also, she did a song with Mariah, bitch, for the...

What movie was that? The Prince of Egypt, dude! The Prince of Egypt! The Prince of Egypt! I love that song. I love that song. This is from 1998. My Love is Your Love is the name of the album.

When You Believe from the Prince of Egypt, Whitney Houston, Mariah Carey. That song, chills. Chills all over my body. My nipples are hard. My leg hairs are raised. Wow. This episode is brought to you by Progressive Insurance. Fiscally responsible, financial geniuses, monetary magicians. These are things people say about drivers who switch their car insurance to

progressive and save hundreds, because Progressive offers discounts for paying in full, owning a home, and more. Plus, you can count on their great customer service to help you when you need it, so your dollar goes a long way. Visit progressive.com to see if you could save on car insurance. Progressive Casualty Insurance Company and Affiliates, potential savings will vary, not available in all states or situations. If data management is slowing down your business, you need the Intuit ERP. If one entity is here and one here and one here and one here, you need the Intuit ERP. If scaling your business feels like start starting over, you need the Intuit ERP. Intuit Enterprise Suite is the AI Native ERP solution.

that consolidates, migrates, and automates, all in one place. Learn more at Intuit.com slash ERP. Third or I guess fourth song of the week, I'm just kind of firing them off at this point. It's never three. I always have more than three. A song that I'm clinically addicted to and I'm kind of embarrassed about it because it's like so pop country is called Country Boys Dream Girl is the name of the song and it's by Ella Langley.

And now I used to live by Langley Air Force Base. I believe that's in Virginia or it's in North Carolina. Carolina. Langley. That's in Hampton, Virginia. Yeah, I used to live by Langley Air Force Base, because my father used to work there, okay? Because my father's a red-blooded patriot, okay? Not taking questions at this time on my father. Um, joint base Langley Eustis. Here's one of my deep fantasies, okay? And after I saw Top Gun for the first time, and after I saw Top Gun Maverick, starring, of course, Miles Teller and Glenn Powell and Jay Ellis. Hi, Jay Ellis. Hello, J. Ellis.

We are saying schnitz. Yuhu! I have my little handkerchief. Yoho, boys! Me to J. Ellis. This should be a how-to-get-Ristrating Order 101 podcast. I can really help with that course of action. If you guys are interested there, I can really give some pointers.

Oh, yeah! Okay. I have this deep, visceral fantasy of, for some reason, okay? I have relocated the HQ. Brosky Nation now has an underground base, a headquarters, a military operative base, somewhere near a famous American Air Force base. Okay, stay with me. We're sleeping in Cots, we're underground, we're District 13.

Okay, we're District 13ing it from Hunger Games. We have a complete, fully operative, we have nukes, we have missiles, we have ammo, we have grenades, all of it's underground, Broski Nation, the Broski Nation Arsenal. Tottenham Arsenal Tottenham Torntham Forest versus Arsenal Arsenal versus Liverpool

Liverpool Liverpool Not de freaking football team Sports soccer team Arsenal definition A collection of weapons and military equipment

Period I'm so fucking smart Oh yeah dude This is what the Brose Canadian Arsenal looks like Fucking pull it up The Royal Armand Leeds Oh that is fucking

ridiculous. Those are all swords and like, what are these called pommels? Oh no, the pommel of a sword. These are called paldrons up on your shoulders. These are knights helmets here. Swords. Those are crosses so that God blesses you in battle. God, the Holy Crusades were so fucking stupid if you really think about it. I want to start a history series where I just talk about men being fucking stupid throughout history. You're going to start a holy war? Cringe. Oh, you started a literal Holy War? My God's better than yours. No, my God's better in yours. What the fuck did you just say? You started a Holy War. Guys, can we find something better to do with our time? Has anyone thought about the big ball of light in the sky? Maybe we should like study that, study the moon, study the tides.

Your God caught my God's stupid. I'm gonna fucking kill you! Anyway Holy War is crazy Okay, anyway Back to the Royal Arsenal in Leeds Yeah, this is kind of what the Brookesky Nation one looks like Except actually no, we would actually be equipped with Victorian sort of weaponry

Or American Civil War era weaponry It's muskets Reload! You have to do the gunpowder and the Oh shit! And it's those old-timey cannons Fire! Fire! No! And you have to cover your ears like this.

Actually, each member of the Brosky... Each member of the Brosky military is going to have to wear a bala clava like this. The one that I currently have on, Teddy Fresh Balaclava with the little ears. Okay? And the colors... Well, I've said this before with regards to the furry military. Of course, furries are going to be on the front lines. The operatives are going to be kind of in the control room underground,

helping with like geolocation and stuff like that and strategy and oh, they're coming in from the north. Oh my God, warfare and broskey nation's crazy because we actually have dragons, but we're still fighting with Civil War era technology. And everyone's on camelback and horseback, but not normal horses, okay, little Shetland ponies. And they trot like that.

And they're real proper, they're real tiny, and their legs are this short. Furries are going to be on the front lines because what did I say in that video? Does anyone remember? Say it with me. Bulletproof outfits. Bulletproof uniforms. Okay?

What a known fact about furry costumes. They are bulletproof if you make them that way. Mine will be bullet resistant, sweat resistant. They will be built with AC and heater units inside of them. Night vision goggles in the fucking eyes. Are you guys listening? Do you care? Can I just get you guys to be serious for half of a fucking minute?

It's so hard. Guys, pay attention. We're talking military strategy here. Anyway, back to the Royal Archives and Leeds. Yeah, this is what ours looks like. That's where all the funding is going, okay? All the money that's being funneled into Brozky Nation is being funneled out into the military complex that I'm creating underground in a sort of District 13-esque way. Okay?

Now, do I think Phillipsian? Moore Hoffman is hot. Yeah, I do. Okay, a little bit. So those were the songs. Yeah, country boys, dream girl. Again, how did I start talking about that? How did I start talking about, y'all need to put me on one of those shows that's like, how do you connect this topic to this topic? I will find a way in five minutes or less. Let me cook. Let me cook, okay? I can connect Shernoble to just about anything if you give me the time and a microphone. I can really make that happen for you. Those are the The last song is Stockholm Syndrome by Muse. I've been in a muse mood lately.

I think Uprising by Muse is one of my songs of the week like three weeks ago. I love Muse. And I only recently realized that they are British. And you got to hand it to the British, okay? They know how to make an alternative grungy rock band and then reintroduce it to America. You know, that's actually, T.

If you're like a classic rock enthusiast, classic rock, quote, unquote. one of the only like famous American rock and roll bands from that era is Aerosmith all the other ones are fucking British dude

actually I may be lying Guns and Roses are they American they're American Yeah, 1985 Guns and Roses and Aerosmith because fucking Led Zeppelin How about famous

famous rock bands from the 80s? Oh guys the Dye's Diary is churning. Okay, maybe I'm actually talking out of my ass. Motley Crew, are they British? Motley Crew's American, let's fucking go. Def Leopard.

English. Journey, American. ACDC. Australian? I thought ACDC was British. Fleetwood Mac. American, of course. Rolling Stones, British.

Queen, British. Dyer Straits, British. Kiss, American. No, I didn't know that. White Snake. English. Iron Maiden English

Judas Priest English See so many of these are fucking British The Clash English Hollow notes Proudly American Okay

Don't you forget it ZZ Top American The Police English Van Halen Van Halen's American Did not know that formed in Pasadena California

Let's fucking go Bon Jovi American Guns and Roses American Metallica American That's actually T Oh, my mom loves rush. Canadian.

Let's go. Woo, Canada. This episode is brought to you by Progressive Insurance. Fiscally responsible, financial geniuses, monetary magicians. These are things people say about drivers who switch their car insurance to progressive and save hundreds. Because Progressive offers discounts for paying in full, owning a home, and more. Plus, you can count on their great customer service to help you when you need it, so your dollar. goes a long way. Visit progressive.com to see if you could save on car insurance. Progressive

casualty insurance company and affiliates. Potential savings will vary, not available in all states or situations. If data management is slowing down your business, you need the Intuit ERP. If one entity is here and one here and one here, you need the Intuit ERP. If scaling your business feels like starting starting over, you need the Intuit ERP. You need the Intuit ERP. You need the Intuit ERP. Intuit Enterprise Suite is the AI-Native ERP solution that consolidates, migrates, and automates, all in one place. Learn more at intuitt.com slash ERP. Biggest band of the 80s.

Let's consult Reddit. Who do you guys think was the most famous band in the 80s? Like everyone was like, oh, my God! I think probably, well, no, Led Zeppelin was like 60s, I think. They had their heyday. Maybe I'm biased because Aerosmith, I grew up in an Aerosmith household, my stepmom loves Aerosmith, and I do too. I want to say Aerosmith like really, really was on top in the 80s. Who is the number one rock band in the 80s?

This is from American Songwriter.com Guns and Roses. Despite popping up midway through the decade, Guns and Roses seismically shifted the tides of rock and roll when they came around. Fuck, I'm rock on. The fuck I'm all. Appetite for destruction brought something entirely new to the rock sphere while their grungy look quickly became adopted by their predecessors. What the fuck was the movie that What's His Name Was in? Tom Cruise was in where he played The Rock Guy. Rock of Ages?

Yeah, this movie. Was this it? Oh, this has terrible ratings. Okay, why the fuck is Alec Baldwin in it? Yeah. I think it's this one. Julianne Huff and Tom Cruise. Yep, it's this one.

Oh, I fucking love this dude. I hope he's not problematic. God damn it. Diego Boneta, he played Luis Miguel in the the series on Netflix. I love that. And he was also he,

this motherfucker is in the famous video of Extra Hot No Foam de la latte. Signora Awesome. Isn't he? That video? where she's ordering coffee, Signora Awesome. Siniarita Awesome, coffee scene.

Yeah, from Scream Queens, dude. Oh, hi, Miss Bean. What are you doing? Make a pumpkin spice latte, you psychopath. Next time I get you fired or worse. Look at him. It's Luis Miguel. Other barista. I mean, I just met her.

I'm pledging Kappa. Lante Psych on me, name Chanel. She's president of the Kappa House, and she thinks that means her poop smells like ginger beer. She's the president of the Kappa House. That means she thinks her poop smells like ginger beer. If my shit smelled like ginger beer, that would be a problem. I'd go, I'd have to go to the poop doctor. Oh my God, do y'all remember when I had to go to the poop doctor?

And I had to shit in a bucket. Do you guys remember that? I had to shit in a bucket and take it to my doctor in the plastic. I think I have IBS, and he was like, I need you to do something for me. He said, Ms. Tomlinson, I need you to do something for me and you're not going to like it.

And I said, Doc, lay it on me. I'll do anything. Am I doing a secret mission? And he handed me a plastic bucket and said, I need you to put it. And I said, this must have been like what Circe felt like during the Walk of Shame in Game of Thrones when they paraded her

through the city naked, ringing that bell. Shame! Shame! That was me having to shit in a literal bucket. And then give it to the doctor. I'm here to drop off my schnitzel. When the schnitzel laughed, it wins from my body.

Yeah. I see the poop doctor. Oh my God, I have never felt so fucking bear. Stripped bear. He is so cute in this. I just wish that he didn't act like that. She must think her poop doesn't smell like ginger bear. What are you talking?

She must think her poop doesn't smell like a mrs. match a latte with double oat milk foam and some vanilla. What are you talking about? Oh my God, I didn't even tell you. So my plan is to move in next to a, oh, yeah, this movie. Hold on, go back. It is so fucking hard living in my brain for 30 minutes. Imagine trying to speak for an hour straight.

What the fuck am I talking about? I had that moment about 36 different times filming one of these. What the fuck? Am I talking about? What the fuck was I talking about? Anyway, Diego Bonnetta. He was in Luis Miguel. And he was in Rock of Ages.

Don't remember that. Rock of Ages, I think, was this, like, movie where all these older stars were like, let's meet a movie about the 80s. And then everyone was like, yeah, I love this dog. I remember watching it being like, where are these fucking old people doing? You know what one of my new favorite bits to do with my friends is is to be like, wait, how old are you again? They'll be like, well, 27.

Damn! I think that's a Kevin Hartman. I think that's where I got that. Yeah, that was Kevin Hart and Don Cheatel. Where he said, how are you? Damn! I have to pull the other. Don Cheedle.

But at the same time, like I said, and me, you know, I'm 56 years old. Damn! I'm sorry. I'm sorry. Because it was a thought, I don't know, seriously. It was a thought and I blurted it out. I didn't mean it that way. I'm fine.

Okay, but just understand I didn't mean it the way it came up. We'll take a poll on how you meant it with people here later after the show's over, but... I can sit up here and honestly say, buddy, that that was from a place of love. Got it. Like, damn. Like, damn. If we could play it back to play back. These are two different dams.

Playback in slow motion. There was no, like... I said, damn. No, you said the word, damn. Do you want me to tell you how you said it? I know how I said it, don't. Do you want me to say it back to you how I think you said it? Go ahead.

Damn. Not true. Not true. Fam. I said Kevin. I said, Dammit. But at the same.

That is so funny. Damn. I'm 56 years old. Damn. That is hilarious, a girl. I'm going to start doing that to my grandparents. Nana held you again? Damn.

What is Langley Air Force Base known for? It's among the oldest continuously active air bases in the U.S. In 1916, the National Advisory Committee for, aeronautics predecessor to NASA. So this was NACA. National Advisory Committee for Aeronautics. Established the need for a joint airfield and proving ground for Army, Navy, and NACA aircraft. Damn.

Why is Langley Air Force Base closed? Didn't close? Things to do. Arts and crafts. Oh, on-based recreation. I don't know if any other military brasss listen to this podcast, but you don't know if any other military brats listen to this podcast, but if you grew up as a military brat, you know that on base kind of slays. I mean, it gets kind of boring, but it kind of slays. It's fun. It can be fun.

There's like, oh my God, remember, we lived in South Korea in 2008, and going on base was like the highlight of my week because I was in sixth grade. We lived in a foreign country. I had friends. I also went to school on the American Air Force. I actually went to school in the American Army Base because we lived in Seoul. The American Air Force Base is in Osan. We lived in Seoul off base in a high-rise apartment. And it was me and my family. It was five of us.

It's in South Korea. Like there aren't really that many American chain restaurants. I mean, there's McDonald's and stuff like that. But obviously it's like that was my first time really out of the country, experiencing something that wasn't familiar to me as a child. And I think that was the first time I experienced true homesickness where like it was so hustle and bustle and it was so interesting to learn about everything. And, you know, I was meeting Korean-American friends who were the children of American servicemen who had married a Korean woman while they were, you know, on duty. And I was

friends with those kids at my school and they would teach me Korean. And we would talk about 21 and Wondergirls and girls generation and like the early sort of 2010s era of K-pop. And I had all the sort of cutesy like anime stuff and all the cute little, oh my God, one thing, one thing that I miss, well, I miss a lot about South Korea, but one thing that I really miss is how fucking cute their stationary is. The little pins and pencils and erasers and boxes to hold it all in and little zipper pouches and backpacks and oh my God, the school supplies were so funny. I miss them all the time.

Luckily, I live kind of close, well, not really close, to Koreatown and Little Japan is what it's called in L.A. And they have stores like that, and I literally go. I literally go and get myself little stage days. They're so cute with the little bunnies and the little, like, oh my God, the little teddy bears. I do miss that. The food, oh, my God, we would have like breaks in between classes because it was kind of, it was weird for a middle school.

It was like, I had to walk to my different classes. It wasn't, you know, just three or four classrooms. They were different buildings, different little portables, all of, it was a campus. And they had little stands where if you saved up enough wand from whatever, you know, if your parents gave you money, you could go and buy the like spicy noodles. I miss it so much. I miss living in Korea. It was really fun.

What was I going to say? Oh, you know, sometimes after school, my mom would pick me up. And I think my siblings were in pre-k or kindergarten. Actually, I don't know if my siblings were in school yet. They were really young. I think they were in kindergarten. After she would pick them up and then me up, we would run errands on base, you know, for like whatever reason.

And she would take us to the commissary and the BX. And those were places like that had, you know, Taco Bell and Popeyes and Pizza Hut and all this. And it was like, oh my God! And then they had like American toys. I mean, it was like a Walmart on base. They sold electronics and household stuff. And we would go there. And it literally felt like such a treat when we got to go to the BX or to the

commissary because I was like, Popeyes. And they had ice cream, like American ice cream. It was just so fun. And I'm looking back on it now as like those were just gross chain restaurants. But it's such a piece of home. And I know that there's a lot of, that's a loaded statement of like, why do we associate ate nasty, gross, unhealthy chain restaurants, fast food chain restaurants with America, but of course we do.

And it is such a piece of comfort when you're overseas. It's like, oh my God. And it's not like, you know, if you've ever been to like a Spanish McDonald's or I went to a Taco Bell in London, it's fucking gross. Like, I don't know what you bitches are doing. Like, it's nothing. It's nothing like an American Taco Bell. And so in South Korea, it would be, you know, I guess the American quality when we would

go on base and I was like, oh, thank God. Gentlemen, ladies and gentlemen, God bless America, God bless our troops. And gentlemen, start your engines. That was me on base. Anyway, yeah, I remember living, we didn't live on base. I've never lived on a military base that I can remember. My dad had a lot of different, he was stationed a lot of different places that I probably We don't remember because I was too young. But in Korea, we didn't live on base. Anyway, my plan for Brosky Nation, can we fucking get back to the point here, guys? Can we get back to it?

Broski Nation, at some point I'm going to relocate outside of a popular Air Force base, and I am going to, yuh! Yeah! In my little Marilyn Monroe white dress, no undies. Okay? No undies, maybe some Spanx, maybe some three. X-L spanks underneath, but no hundies. And I'm gonna, yoh!

Right outside where they, like, check your ID. And I'm gonna say, there are the boys! There are as young servicemen. I'm just a little German girl. And they'll be like, ma'am, you have got to... There are, like, military vehicles coming through here. You need to get out of the way.

Also, why don't you have underwear on? Why are you barefoot? Okay. Yoo-hoo! My handkerchief is shit-stained. You-oh! They're like, ma'am, you've got, you are in the way. Please.

I'm dodging in between those little like the arms that come down to block the, they'll have the arm come down, they'll check your military ID, and then they'll let you on. You-hoo, I jump it, I'm running. I go straight for the barracks. I go straight for the dorms, okay? Yoo-hoo! Does anybody want me? I'm just to leave the German guy.

They tackle me to the ground. My skirt comes up. No! No! My spinks! My tan spinks. No, no Don't let me go back

And then a young gentleman Comes out of the barracks Stop! Stop! That's my wife! She escaped! What I'm saying is If there are any young, beautiful Brunette, blue-eyed American servicemen Who don't love beating women,

Please hit my line. Why is it? What is it about the fucking military That makes you all just want to punch? Y'all just want to punch. You don't want to punch. Damn! Get that under control, dude!

With all that being said, if there is a lovely young gentleman who's just getting out of the military, who's like, I can't do this anymore, and they're clean cut, and they are in a uniform, and they want me, guess what?

Yoo-hoo! You-hoo! Young gentleman, lieutenant. You-ho, little lieutenant. I'm outside. I'm here. Oh my God, Elvis has this movie called GI Blues.

problematic movie, by the way, very, very problematic themes and ideas explored in the movie. Does he look good in it? Yeah. God, oh, this was so cute with his little cheekbones. And there's something, I mean, you could be just ugly as a hog. You could be hog, wild, ugly. And if you've got on a military uniform, hello, yah, goodnton talk, Danka, Dankashare. Is that how you say thank you in German?

Thank you in German. Thank you. Thank you. How to say hello, hello. Hello. How to say hello sir in German. Hello? Hello.

Hello her. Hello her. How to say do you want me in German? Like? Will's to me? Wils? Wils? Will's to me?

Will's do me? Hello? Hello, Herr! Or maybe it's not in the throat. Hello, Herr. Wils to me? And then they'll say, no, and shoot me. No!

And then they'll shoot me. It's over, dude. How did you get on the military base? How did you get on the military base in German? German. English to German. There's also a line not to go back to Sherlock Holmes, but I will. Sherlock Holmes, too, a game of shadows, is set in, I think, 1892, and it was in the middle of a conflict between Germany and France. And I honestly don't know how much of it is historically accurate, because again, don't care to look it up. But there's a bombing in Strasbourg, and the Germans and the

French are bombing each other back and forth, and there's some bombings in London and all this of, you know, affiliated, whatever. There's a scene where Sherlock goes up, to Mycroft, his brother, and they're talking back and forth, and Microft is played by Stephen Fry. And he says, there's an ongoing something and the, da-da-da, and I can't tell you exactly what it is, but I can't tell you they speak French and German. Anyway, that's just like a, Stephen Frye. Also, Stephen Fry narrates some stuff on Calm, the Calm app. Okay, what was I going to say? me into the military base. Lass me in the military basis.

Lass me in the military basis. Lass me in the military basis. Hello, ha. Lass me in the military basis. That's a made-up language, dude. You're just speaking English with a little, with a little, with a little, quh, okay?

Do you listen to hosier? Host... Hirsto Hutzier? Hostu Hustu... Hustucia? Hustu Hustio? Hustu Hostia. I'm gonna stick with Spanish, girl.

That's crazy. German's crazy. Y'all are crazy MFers. Okay? Germany is full of crazy MFers. Germany! Germany? Germany.

How do you say Germany in German? Deutschland. Deutschland. Deutsche Land. Yehoo! That's crazy. All right team, I think that'll do it for me this episode Thanks so much for listening

I don't even get to talk about the seven deadly sins We'll get to it eventually, okay? I'm gonna pop an edible and we're gonna talk about it Okay Go get your merch, Brosky Report merch, broskey dot shop Okay, sweatshirt, hoodie, t-shirt, get it while it lasts We are doing YouTube videos every week on the Brittany

Brosky YouTube channel, go subscribe to that Subscribe to this YouTube channel, The Brothew Report, if you da. If you da! And rate us five stars on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Google Podcasts, Audible, wherever the fuck you listen to this, okay? Whatever on the internet, your grimy little rat hands found this podcast, go ahead and rate me five stars. I'm loving you guys.

It's been real. See you. Your social media feed delivers plenty of advice. But it doesn't know you. It doesn't ask questions. It doesn't give physical exams or order tests. Doctors do. At the American Medical Association,

we believe the best care starts with a real conversation with someone who understands the science and your unique health. So stay curious. Ask questions. But when it's time to make decisions, make them with a doctor. Learn more at AMA Health vs.hype.org. That's AMAHealthVShype.org. Struggling to see up close, make it visible with Viz.

This is a once daily prescription eye drop to treat blurry near vision for up to 10 hours. The most common side effects that may be experienced while using Viz include eye irritation, temporary dimmer dark vision, headaches and eye redness. Talk to an eye doctor to learn if Viz is right for you. Learn more at Viz.com. On this episode of Plant Killers, we'll explore one nation's most notorious fruit and vegetable killer, bad dirt. What makes bad dirt so bad? The answer? The ingredients.

But fear not true crime enthusiasts. This story has a happy ending. Miracle grow organic raised bed and garden soil. It's made with quality organic ingredients from upcycled green waste like compost and aged bark. Unlike the other guys who can't say the same, looks like bad dirt's murdering days are over. Thanks to Miracle Grow. Join us next time on Plant Killers.