The Broski Report with Brittany Broski - 6: Vampire Jack Townson & Other Niche Interests

Episode Date: June 20, 2023

This week on The Broski Report, fearless leader Brittany Broski proclaims her admiration (obsession) for Vampire Jack Townson and breaks down other niche interests like Frozen, Love island, and more. ... Follow The Broski Report: https://www.linktr.ee/broskireport https://www.tiktok.com/@broskireport https://instagram.com/broskireport Follow Brittany: https://www.tiktok.com/@brittany_broski https://instagram.com/brittany_broski https://youtube.com/brittany_broski Brought To You By: Hello Fresh – https://hellofresh.com/Broski16 + code BROSKI16 Find Athena Club at Target Stores Nation Wide PDS Debt – https://pdsdebt.com/report 

Transcript
Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:00 This episode is brought to you by Progressive Insurance. Fiscally responsible, financial geniuses, monetary magicians. These are things people say about drivers who switch their car insurance to progressive and save hundreds, because Progressive offers discounts for paying in full, owning a home, and more. Plus, you can count on their great customer service to help you when you need it, so your dollar goes a long way. Visit Progressive.com to see if you could save on car insurance. Progressive Casualty Insurance Company and Affiliates. Potential savings will vary, not available in all states or situations. Direct from the Broski Nation headquarters in Los Angeles, California.
Starting point is 00:00:44 This is The Brozky Report with your host, Brittany Brozky. Good morning, team. It's me. Brittany Broski, the host of this show, The Brosky Report, starring me. Brittany Brosky, your host. Okay, so we laughed off, laughed weekend. let's actually pump the brakes really quick, guys. Everyone take a deep breath and exhale.
Starting point is 00:01:12 We're going to do it again. Okay, hey guys, welcome back. So we left off last week talking about Vampire Jack. If you're not caught up, hey, now is the time to go catch up. Go back to last week and listen to the end of that episode because I talk about one of my favorite online content creators, Vampire Jack Townsend. Okay?
Starting point is 00:01:42 Here's a visual for anyone. that wants to know. Okay? So I briefly, briefly scratched the surface of vampire jackdows. I wish Brooke was here. Brooke would back me up. Shout out Lady Ephron. Shout out Brooke Averick. She's really holding it down for the girls. Any podcast that I go on, any piece of media that I am on, I'm going to mention Brooke Averick. Okay? And that's just a truth that I really hold tight to my chest. Okay, for some fucking reason Let me, okay, let me pump the brakes My coffee just kicked in
Starting point is 00:02:20 Okay, don't talk to me before I've had my fucking morning coffee And watched at least 17 Vampire Jack Townsend videos Don't fucking talk to me Hey, Monday mood Okay, pump day mood I'm just gonna turn this into like a millennial core podcast And you guys are gonna have to deal with it because that's what I want to do.
Starting point is 00:02:46 Okay, mustache moment. Anyway. So this man, this specimen. Yeah, he's hot. All right? You want me to say he's not? He's hot. He's hot.
Starting point is 00:02:57 I'm not going to say her fucking lie. Look at him. Is he fucking weird? Yeah. I'm into it. When your boyfriend is a thirst-trapping vampire on the internet. She's hot, too. Tell me you're not into that a little bit.
Starting point is 00:03:13 No? Villains. The girl or the world, anti-hero, burn it all down. Wait, what? Burn it all. Not him using the fire going on for so long. The caption, okay, this is a video. This is a video that he made.
Starting point is 00:03:42 He's playing both characters. One is the villain, one is the anti-hero. And the villain says, your girl or the world, pick. And he has his girl in his arms and he says, burn it all down. and then the screen is like shaking and there's fire and flames and he's engulfed in red light. What's the song? I can't deal with that actually. This is the type of books I read.
Starting point is 00:04:07 This is literally a book. I would read this book and I would eat it up and I would reread it and I would say they need to make it to a movie. And then I'd go on Tumblr and I'd re-blog post about it on Tumblr and I'd make it my wallpaper. I love shit like this. Maybe that's why I like Vampire Jack Townsend. I am a Vampire Jack Townsend sympathizer. Oh my God. Maybe that's why.
Starting point is 00:04:27 It's because I love this sort of like fantasy, almost, almost borderline toxic relationships. Almost. Where they love each other so much, it's toxic. I'm obsessed with that, dude. Okay, so this video says, he's sexiest when he literally wants to unalive you. And it's just really terrifying,
Starting point is 00:04:52 blurry android images of vampire Jack Townsend. And he is hot, okay? I just, like, can't get over. This man probably is, like, a paralegal. This man probably just, like, is a scribe for a court. What's it called when you, like, you, like, take notes of a court hearing? That's probably what he does during the day,
Starting point is 00:05:16 and then he gets home and he's like, fuck. I have to clock in. Vampire Jack Townsend. So he clocks out of his 9 to 5 and he puts in those fucking red eye contact lenses and he goes, I'm going to sack and blob. And he clocks in, dude, and he delivers us this A plus S tier content every fucking time. And he's going to do it every time.
Starting point is 00:05:41 And you bitches are mad. You bitches are so mad about it because he's eating it up. Yeah, and whatever. See, like, how does he do the vampire teeth, do you think? Because they look real. Well, he is a real vampire, apparently. The makeup I just, I just like, I don't. So for audio listeners, the makeup is this red, sort of like, almost bird-like
Starting point is 00:06:11 eye shadow that comes down his nose, and it's only on his eyes on his nose. And then he's got, like, no other makeup on his face, and then the vampire teeth in. And usually, hey, his chesticles are out, okay? He's showing him, boobies. He's showing him. Yaya's. One thing about vampire jack, he's got his fucking yawas out. He's got his yawas and his gut.
Starting point is 00:06:38 He wears these rings that go on every single finger and there's chains that connect him. I'm obsessed with him, maybe, actually. I think you guys need to be obsessed with him the way that I do. I can't deal with it, though. He's hot. Look at him. Look at him. He is sexy, dude.
Starting point is 00:06:57 I'm saving this picture. Oh, I got a screenshot it. Doink. He uses like curl cream too. He uses Aussie herbal essences hair curl product. Here is the caption on this video, by the way. Here's the caption on this hot sexy picture. Against the wall.
Starting point is 00:07:27 Oh, it's a blood emoji. The blood drop emoji. Against the wall we've... I can't actually, okay, let me start. Stop. Stop! Be serious. Against the wall, we fall from grace.
Starting point is 00:07:41 The pain we love is taking shape, a burning lust to touch the flame over and over again. We've played this role a thousand times, the same old script, just different lies. You disappear without a trace, concealing the crimes on your face. Still one of the hottest songs, hands down. What's your favorite motionless and white song? Who's that? Who's motionless and white? Oh, they're a very famous band.
Starting point is 00:08:15 Oh, this looks boozy. It's all like horror themed. Thanks for one billion streams. We have to listen to motionless and white. I'm going to listen to it because YouTube's getting copyrighted and I'll come back with a review. I'm literally into this. Okay, okay. And we're back.
Starting point is 00:08:31 I listen to it and I'm so fucking into it. It's giving like a little green day, a little All-American Rejects, a little like sleeping with sirens maybe but it's all like scary horror werewolf vocals only motionless and white presents werewolf oh they're on tour
Starting point is 00:08:54 guys we should go they're on tour they're not coming to California the dark horizon tour that is so period werewolf vocals only I'm literally obsessed I don't actually don't care Okay, so where was I? Go back to Vampire Jack.
Starting point is 00:09:26 I don't care about you guys. Okay. Okay, so those are the lyrics that he, he, I thought that was a poem he wrote. And I was like, oh, this kind of sucks. Vampire Jack, why don't you stick to whatever the fuck you do? Don't write poetry. I also think that there's something so, like, when you're trying to be creepy and scary, like, rhyming in a poem, not the way to do it.
Starting point is 00:09:48 Oh my God, he has a beard here. I would like to see the baby. Oh, it's his cat. And he drew on a beard. Okay, so he's a Star Wars adult, too. Um, Vampire Jack Townsend. What are you doing this weekend? These are the type of fuckers I used to match with on like Tinder and Bumble,
Starting point is 00:10:11 and then they'd have a violent, passionate hate for women, hatred for women. Like, literally, they think they're in a fucking movie. They think they're the main character in a movie. And, like, they seem all fun in games, but it's the type of man that's like, don't worry, kitten, I will order us dinner because you can't read. It's like that sort of shit. Like, these men are so fucking delusional and not in a fun way. Like, trust and believe I'm into this.
Starting point is 00:10:42 Like, I'm eating this up with a fork and a knife. But, like, in real life, he's probably fucking insufferable. Where'd that hot picture go of him? Yes, dude. Damn, damn, he's got some, he's got a rack on him. Going up to a man and saying nice rack. Okay, let's go through the horny mom comments on this. Someone commented and said, you know, I really have to stop fainting, but I can't help it.
Starting point is 00:11:20 What are you talking about? Be the Edward Cullen to my Bella Swan. Girl, I almost, like, I probably commented that. you would make a good toy? What does that mean? What does that mean? She has children and a husband and a butt plug. What the fuck?
Starting point is 00:11:43 Where are you freaking love this is amazing, so beautiful and poignant. You're truly one incredible God, king, Lord, sire, prince, man, vampire. I don't know what to say. I'm speechless. You're so very special. There was no one in any universe, in any world, and any afterlife, as special and beautiful as you inside and out. I'm obsessed with you.
Starting point is 00:12:09 There's no punctuation in this sentence. Inside as you inside and out. I, you so very much. You have my heart. I'm under your spell completely. You can't be real. You're too amazing. I mean, every word I say with every fiber of my being,
Starting point is 00:12:26 my dear special vampire and friend, Jack Deer, Bloody Daddy. What's our third! And she commented again! With a bunch of hearts and flame emojis. Oh my God. And she commented again! That was a lot.
Starting point is 00:12:51 That's literally me commenting under any man that I liked post. You are so special and amazing. With every fiber of my being. That's literally me, dude. She gets it. Holy shit. An absolutely stunning, murderous little creature. Oh, he got a blowout!
Starting point is 00:13:20 Yeah! Bitch he got a blowout! He used the Dyson! Oh, it's celebrating his girlfriend. Love you girlfriend, but that should be me. What would you do if your favorite vampire came back from the dead? Ha ha ha ha ha ha.
Starting point is 00:13:41 Nah, man, it's fucking with you. with you. Still very dead, but uh, it's been a year and I wanted to come by and say hey. I'm sorry. For a second. I ruined my day. The sexy picture of him to make up for it. Oh my god. Oh, that just, oh, that made me so fucking mad.
Starting point is 00:14:49 Oh my god, I'm livid. Oh, there's nothing worse than when a, when a man that looks like that starts talking. Don't ever fucking talk. That was truly something awful. That was like, we need to take a break. We need to take a break. We'll be right back. This episode is brought to you by Progressive Insurance.
Starting point is 00:15:24 Fiscally responsible, financial geniuses, monetary magicians. These are things people say about drivers who switch their car insurance to progressive and save hundreds. Because Progressive offers discounts for paying in full, owning a home, and more. Plus, you can count on their great customer service to help you when you need it, so your dollar goes a long way. Visit progressive.com to see if you could save on car insurance. Progressive Casualty Insurance Company and affiliates. Potential savings will vary, not available in all states or situations.
Starting point is 00:15:55 You started your business with a great idea and a ton of hustle. Let Gottprint.com help you look the part. Grow your business by getting professional marketing that works. Need business cards before a networking event? High impact postcards for a promotion or sleek signs for your storefront? We offer a huge selection, reliable quality and low pricing. Right now, get 20% off your first order with the code podcast.
Starting point is 00:16:17 So don't worry about printing. Worry about growing your business. Start today at gotprint.com and print with confidence. Attention. I need everyone's attention. Please stop what you're doing and listen to me immediately. I know you were before, but now listen again, but harder. The video, if you are watching the video version of my podcast on YouTube,
Starting point is 00:16:37 cut out right here. I don't know what happened if there was an electrozap. in the wall connected to the cameras. I don't know, but the cameras just shut off. And I, even when I was recording, I was like, hmm, that camera's light just flickered. I wonder what that means. Anyway, let's keep going, because I'm an idiot, dude. I'm an idiot. Anyway, if you're watching on YouTube, this is where the video cuts off. There is no more video after this part, but in the next episode, it's full video. So this is a one-time thing. I plugged it finally into, what's that called, to prevent electrosh shocks?
Starting point is 00:17:17 What's that thing called? Circuit, circuit breaker. Circuit. Surge protector. That's what it's fucking called, dude, a surge protector. And guess what? I didn't use one of those. And it shows.
Starting point is 00:17:31 So, yeah, if you're watching the video, there's no more video. But the rest of the podcast is fine if you want to go over to Spotify, Apple Podcast, whatever. Or stick around. If you're on YouTube, just stick around. because we've included some fun photos for you to look at for the rest of the video as a form of visual aid. So enjoy this week's episode. Sorry about that.
Starting point is 00:17:52 I'm an idiot. It won't happen again, my loyal minions. And enjoy the rest of the episode. Okay, love you. Bye-bye. And we're back. Thank you guys for hanging out during that brief intermission. I had to collect my fucking composure
Starting point is 00:18:07 and collect my thoughts. find my piece. I lost my piece for a second. He robbed my piece from me with that fucking video! Okay. So now, to touch back on Vampire Jack, I found another great picture. He looks great here.
Starting point is 00:18:30 I don't know, I don't know what the artistic choice is behind the contact lenses, because I've never met a vampire. met a vampire that has context. Now, let's, okay, going back to the first part of that sentence, have I ever met a vampire? No. Okay? But if I did, would he probably be wearing contacts? No. Okay. What's the moral of the story here? The lesson that everyone should take home is that we need to bring back pirate blouses for men. We need to bring back frilly, frilly and delicate clothing for men. I'm talking crop tops.
Starting point is 00:19:10 I'm talking printed tank tops. I'm talking pirate blouses. I'm talking Empire waistline, empire neckline. Maybe a nice cowl neck blouse for a man, one of these. We need to bring back this, but for men. A cowl neck top in vanilla? Man, we need to really get into that, guys. I need someone to be on that.
Starting point is 00:19:36 I want to see more male yawas this year than any Instagram model. Okay? I want to see man boobs. I want to see man boobs on my feed. Give me man nipple, man boob, man underboob, man ya ya. That's what I'm asking for. For Christmas, Mark Zuckerberg's. Just send me some more of that.
Starting point is 00:20:02 I found Vampire Jack on my explore page, and I I think my Explore page could, honest to God, have me sent off somewhere. If someone ever got a hold of my iPhone and just opened Instagram, I think that I could, there would be grounds there to send me away to get help somewhere. I genuinely do think that. I'm farting. Actually, that could be poop, so I'm actually not going to let that one rip. Because that's part of the thing about having IBS, like being a god warrior, being a tummy warrior,
Starting point is 00:20:36 is that you know when to hold them and when to fold them, okay? When to let them rip and when to keep it in the, in the pit. Keep it in the, when to, when to farty-hardy and when to hold in the poopy, okay? I mean, you can put that on a t-shirt if you really wanted to. I would just own the IP. Why is he this way? This episode is brought to you by Progressive Insurance. Fiscally responsible, financial geniuses, monetary magicians. These are things people say about drivers who switch their car insurance to
Starting point is 00:21:19 progressive and save hundreds, because Progressive offers discounts for paying in full, owning a home, and more. Plus, you can count on their great customer service to help you when you need it, so your dollar goes a long way. Visit progressive.com to see if you could save on car insurance. Progressive Casualty Insurance Company and Affiliates. Potential savings will vary, not available in all states or situations. You started your business with a great idea and a ton of hustle. Let Gottprint.com help you look the part. Grow your business by getting professional marketing that works.
Starting point is 00:21:51 Need business cards before a networking event? High impact postcards for a promotion or sleek signs for your storefront? We offer a huge selection, reliable quality, and low pricing. Right now, get 20% off your first order with the code podcast. So don't worry about printing. Worry about growing your business. Start today at gotprint.com and print with confidence. The rest of the hall from at Vampire Freaks, and I am absolutely obsessed.
Starting point is 00:22:17 The vampire castle tea and the vampire long sleeve are just insanely comfortable and they look incredible. Vampire freaks. Oh, it's a whole clothing line about vampires. Alternative clothes for the spookily inclined, my mom. I love goth bitches. Vampire Jack tortures me on a daily basis. I want to love him. I do.
Starting point is 00:22:44 He just, he drives me up the wall, dude. I can't, I cannot figure out my feelings about Vampire Jack. Then I will keep bringing him up until I figure it out. So buckle up, Broski Nation. We are at war with the Vampire Kingdom. Oh my god, if there's any... A-O-3 authors who follow me, please, please write that. I know there are some A-O-3 bitches out there that, like, write novels on A-O-3.
Starting point is 00:23:14 Hey, myself included. Okay, myself included. You think I'm excluding myself from that? No, I'm in that. If anyone wants to write about the warring kingdoms of Bro Ski Nation and Vampire Jack's Vampire Kingdom, then, look, you can do that. And you can send it to me, and I will read it on this podcast. Okay?
Starting point is 00:23:35 And it has to be an enemy's to lovers. Okay? It has to be an enemies of lovers. It can't be too much of a slow burn because I don't go all day. Okay? I got about 48 minutes. Which is enough. Okay.
Starting point is 00:23:50 Yeah, I think that my Explore page could really have me sent off somewhere. Let's actually, let's take a look at my Explorer page. What the fuck? Not Trisha Peda's on my Explore Pee. What is Trisha Peda's up to? Oh my God. She is so fucking real. I can't believe she's real.
Starting point is 00:24:18 Oh my God. Okay. I can't look at Trisha Bannis. Okay, here's what I really wanted to, uh, we need to get into this. Enough dilly dallying, folks. I have been rewatching the golden age of Love Island. Okay? I've been rewatching Love Island and I,
Starting point is 00:24:39 I'm re-watching season four, which is arguably the best season because it is. Danny and Jack come on, bitch. Even though they broke up and now Danny has a kid and Jack has a kid, not with each other. I'm devastated by, but I'm absolutely got it. Oh, I'm absolutely got it.
Starting point is 00:24:59 And Jack got fucking hot, dude. If any of you guys don't watch Love Island or didn't watch it, this was the season, like, it was when I just graduated college. It was like 28. 18, 2019. I think the winner was announced 2019. First of all, look at him. Dude, that's Jack. He was hot on Love Island, but he was like, yeah, dude, look at this.
Starting point is 00:25:21 That's crazy. I like him before. I liked him before. Okay? Like, he was definitely cute on Love Island, but he does not look like that anymore. Like he's cute there. Who is that? Who is that? Hold on. Let me find this one picture. I said, Oh my god Oh my god Oh my god Oh my god Oh my good
Starting point is 00:25:55 Why did he edit it like that? What is the deal with British people like this Always being fucking sunburnt? Like they're always just red It's not even a tan It's just like red He's red in all of his photos It's like, it's like,
Starting point is 00:26:13 a permanent redness. Look at it. What's he red? Those are some short shorts, brother damn! I think it's just like when you're that white, dude, you don't tan. Okay, you just, your skin just... And then it peels off. It's like bacon. And I'm, what I talked about last time, where I don't even burn.
Starting point is 00:26:33 Okay, I just get moles. Well, I do burn, that's a lie. I burn, and then it peels, and then I get a mole. And then I gotta go to the doctor. Okay, so... sun, white people in the sun were a match not meant to be. Okay? I, I am meant to be bundled in, in a wolf pelt, okay? Vegan, a vegan wolf pelt somewhere in northern Scandinavia. And do I know what Scandinavia means? No. Okay? And if you do, you're either lying or you have a superiority
Starting point is 00:27:07 Complex. If you tell me what countries are in Scandinavia. Is it even a country, like, is it like, okay, you know when you say like, oh, New England, I bet so very few Americans could be like, oh, here are the four to five states in New England. Okay? If I say, oh, Scandinavia, what is that? Because it's not a country. Am I just an idiot? They're ramblings of a fucking idiot. What is Scandinavia? It's a region in your country. It's a region in your country. It's a region. Scandinavia most commonly refers to Denmark, Norway, and Sweden, where they filmed Frozen. Okay? Where Frozen was filmed?
Starting point is 00:27:52 Where was Frozen? Filmed at Snow Basin Ski Resort in Utah. Though the story takes place at a... What? I'm obsessed with this. Where was Disney's Frozen filmed? It's an animated feature. While the first Frozen film was based in Norway, The second installment is inspired by Iceland.
Starting point is 00:28:16 Now see, that's not Scandinavia, you fucking bitches. Did they use real wolves and frozen? It's an animated movie! The heights and the weather were not the only agonizing parts of production. All the wolves are real, says Green, director Adam Green. Critics assume that they must be CGI. We had six weeks of training with a pack of wolves with the wolf man. What are you talking about?
Starting point is 00:28:40 There were no wolves in Frozen. Wolves in the movie Frozen. These wolves are shown to be inhabitants of the forest that is located outside of the capital village of Arendel. They are seen stalking Anna, Christoph, and Sven. Reindiers are better than people. Oh my God, I love Frozen! I actually watch it tonight.
Starting point is 00:29:02 Once Christoph notices them, the trio began rushing off and the wolves chased after the group immediately. These are based on real wolves? Y'all didn't have to train with real wolves. wolves to make those wolves? Like, are you being funny? Disney Wiki fandom. That's crazy. Why did they train with real wolves? That seems very dangerous and very unnecessary. This episode is brought to you by Progressive Insurance. Fiscally responsible, financial geniuses, monetary magicians. These are things people say about drivers who switch their car insurance to progressive and save hundreds, because Progressive
Starting point is 00:29:38 offers discounts for paying in full, owning a home, and more. Plus, you can count on their great customer service to help you when you need it, so your dollar goes a long way. Visit progressive.com to see if you could save on car insurance. Progressive casualty insurance company and affiliates.
Starting point is 00:29:55 Potential savings will vary, not available in all states or situations. You started your business with a great idea and a ton of hustle. Let gotprint.com help you look the part. Grow your business by getting professional marketing that works. Need business. before a networking event, high-impact postcards for a promotion, or sleek signs for your storefront?
Starting point is 00:30:14 We offer a huge selection, reliable quality, and low pricing. Right now, get 20% off your first order with the code podcast. So don't worry about printing. Worry about growing your business. Start today at gotprint.com and print with confidence. Or at Target nationwide. Reindeer's are better than people. And you already know what I'm going to say.
Starting point is 00:30:36 You already know what I'm about to say. Mustafa Frozen is the ideal man. Wasn't he, who was he voiced by John Krasinski? Jonathan Groff. Who the fuck is Jonathan Groff? Him? He put, oh wait, I knew that. I knew that, I knew that, I knew that. I did know that.
Starting point is 00:30:57 Oh my God. He was in Hamilton? Maybe I don't know who Jonathan Groff is. Maybe I lied. Hamilton is rated higher than Frozen. Yeah, this website. fucking sucks. It's IMDB. Yeah, this website's a fucking scam. International movie database. Okay.
Starting point is 00:31:24 Wait, go back to Christoph. Christoph, ew, do you want to know? I'm actually not going to reveal that about myself. No, I will actually. In high school. Oh, Jesus Christ. In high school, I used to read Christoph and Elsa fan. I just like, I just really don't care. anymore. I'll tell y'all whatever. I'll just like, in so many podcasts and like interviews that I do, they're like, how do you, how do you separate your online persona from who you really are?
Starting point is 00:32:04 And my answer is always, I don't. I have no delineation. What I say on here is what I'm really fucking thinking. I don't have the brain power to come up with a separate persona. Oh my God, I need to go. It's Christoph for Halloween. Did I say Christoph and Elsa? I meant Christoph and Anna. It's been so long. Yeah, I used to read fanfiction, because it wasn't even fan fiction. It was just like continuing. What's that called?
Starting point is 00:32:28 Non- or canon, non-canon. When you read, it's just like a continuation of the normal storyline, but it's that author's kind of interpretation. I was 15. I was just, I have got, look at that. I have got to consume more of this content. Now, what the fuck is that, girl? Christoph in drag. Christoph, uh, feminine, facial feminization surgery.
Starting point is 00:33:00 Christoph's new song and Frozen 2 challenges toxic masculinity, period. And I do think Christoph would have been better if it was played by John Krasinski, but that's just me and you can, you can absolutely crucify me for that. Okay, but you're wrong. You're wrong. Any character would be improved. It was played by John Krasinski. Reindeer's are better than people.
Starting point is 00:33:20 Peep. Reindeer's are. better than people. What's the note? Come on guys. Come on. Rindiers are better than people. People. Reindiers are better than people. Why? Stop! I feel like that girl who's like, and uh, stop! And I will always love you. Stop. And I will always love you girl singing. Racing in the...
Starting point is 00:34:36 That's literally me. Rainsdeers are better than people. Oh my god! That's fucking... She changed my life. That changed my life. Okay, I totally fucked it up. I just listened to it. Okay, here it is.
Starting point is 00:35:57 Rainsdeers are better than people. I can't sing that fucking low. Rain... Rain... Rane... are better than people. YAH! Oh, bitch, I nailed that.
Starting point is 00:36:24 Oh my god, I am Jacob Collier. I am Jacob Collier. Reindiers are better than people. That was bad. Start it again. Rain deers are better than people. Yeah! Stupid.
Starting point is 00:36:40 Sewing! Okay, Frozen Deluxe Edition. How the fuck are their deluxe songs on a movie? Who won't pray for me? Frozen movie soundtrack. Guys. Frozen movie soundtrack. Frozen movie soundtrack.
Starting point is 00:37:19 Here we go. Oh my God. I just got a full body chill down my spine because of Olaf's song in summer. This episode is brought to you by Progressive Insurance. Fiscally responsible, financial geniuses, monetary magicians. These are things people say about drivers
Starting point is 00:37:41 who switch their car insurance to progressive and save hundreds. because Progressive offers discounts for paying in full, owning a home, and more. Plus, you can count on their great customer service to help you when you need it, so your dollar goes a long way. Visit Progressive.com to see if you could save on car insurance. Progressive Casualty Insurance Company and affiliates. Potential savings will vary, not available in all states or situations. You started your business with a great idea and a ton of hustle.
Starting point is 00:38:09 Let Gottprint.com help you look the part. Grow your business by getting professional marketing that works. Need business cards before a networking event? High impact postcards for a promotion or sleek signs for your storefront. We offer a huge selection, reliable quality, and low pricing. Right now, get 20% off your first order with the code podcast. So don't worry about printing. Worry about growing your business.
Starting point is 00:38:32 Start today at gotprint.com and print with confidence. Flop is one of my favorite. And I don't even, okay, I'm going to let the Disney adult come out. Frozen is without question, one of the best animated movies of all time. And Olaf is, therefore, one of the best animated characters of all time. Olaf's character is what I want to be in my life. He is so funny, and he was also a great friend to Anna and Elsa. And I want to be a character like Olaf when I get my own Disney Pixar film because I'm speaking it into existence because it will happen.
Starting point is 00:39:07 I just got a call from Walt himself, confirming it, actually. We're talking about it this weekend. I want an Olaf type of character. I imagine it kind of, it wouldn't be a snowman. It would be almost like a very goofy animal. I'm imagining maybe a chicken, maybe a hog of some sort. Imagine like a Timon or a Pumba sort of moment. Maybe a squawking bird or a little ratty animal.
Starting point is 00:39:33 That's what I'm imagining. I would be, or kind of a very meaty, massy animal. I imagine that's what I would be. And for some reason, when I do voiceover auditions, I always just kind of really lean very New Jersey. Don't know why. There'd be it. Yeah, boss!
Starting point is 00:39:50 Doesn't I imagine? Yeah, boss, get him. I'm on it, boss. That's what my animated character would be. I don't know why he would be like a henchman. I don't know what that's about. Two, also two characters I really enjoy are, when was the last time y'all watched Hercules? Remember Hercules?
Starting point is 00:40:09 Those two little, the little minions that Hades has, pain and panic. These guys, they're so funny. They were so funny. The animation is so funny. It's so like slapstick and they're always getting like ripped apart and burned and shoved and slapped. He literally impaled the other one. It's so stupid. Oh my God, when they show up in the Hercules merch.
Starting point is 00:40:39 This movie is so good after we watch Hercules and Frozen tonight. What was I talking about? Damn it. Oh, Oloff. Olaf is just such a good character. In summer, dude, if any of y'all have ever been to Disney World, they have a Frozen ride and there's a whole Olaf. There's a whole Olaf room.
Starting point is 00:40:59 Where he's doing, En summer, that whole part. And I went on it with my friend, and I filmed it for a YouTube video, which you can go watch on YouTube.com slash Britney underscore Brozky. You can go watch that. It's called, I got drunk in 11 countries. We went on the frozen ride. And when Olaf came, I started, I was drunk. I started screaming like he was Ariana Grande.
Starting point is 00:41:26 Caught you do the drinking around the world if you've never been. It's, Epcot's one of the parks where there's, um, countries. Like, each, you walk around the Epcot Globe that's in the middle of the park and you walk through all these different countries. And so you can have a drink in, uh, Norway and Mexico and Japan and whatever. And so we did that and I was so fucking drunk by the time we got to, uh, uh, the Frozen ride, which was in the little Norway part, that I got on that ride with a bunch of little, little children. Little children just running around at my feet and I was like bouncing up and down giddy to get on this fucking ride
Starting point is 00:42:12 We get on we enter the Olaf room and I scream like I'm like I just met Ariana Grande like Ariana Grande just opened the tour and then And the light shut off I screamed like that's what just happened When in reality it was a little like animatronic of Olaf like this like in summer and I said That's what I did. Okay? And I'm sorry about me blowing out this fucking mic.
Starting point is 00:42:44 This poor, this poor microphone, I spit on it and lick and suck and gag and choke all over it. I'm licking and suck in and kind of like, like gagging a little bit on it sometimes. It's just like, sorry, sorry about that, guys. What was I going to? Oh, fuck me. I didn't even get around to telling you my Love Island, my Love Island, uh, thing. I've been rewatching Love Island and I think they need to make a Love Island for plus and it would be called Love Island Plus with the little plus emoji.
Starting point is 00:43:27 Okay? And maybe Ed Shearan would host it because his album was called Plus or edition or whatever fuck it was. Or maybe it was called Divide. I don't know. No, it was called Plus. He has like Ed Shearon trademarked, like, mathematical signage. Oh, it's called Divide.
Starting point is 00:43:49 Okay, never, hey, scrap that. Scrap that idea. That's stupid. He got married? Who the fuck is Cherry Seaborne? He has children? Ed Shearren has children? Jupiter?
Starting point is 00:44:00 Two daughters? When did Ed Sharon have fucking daughters, dude? He got knighted? When did Edson get knighted? Edward Christopher Shearon, M-B-E. He got fucking knighted. Oh, that just made me itch. No, I'm so smart.
Starting point is 00:44:16 He has an album called X equals and divide. Born in Halifax, West Yorkshire and raised in Framlingham, that's not a real fucking place. British people are lying. Born in Halifax, West Yorkshire, raised in Framlingham, Suffolk. That's not a real place, by the way. He began writing songs around the age of 11. Yeah, me too, babe.
Starting point is 00:44:39 You're not special. Ed Sheeran, you're not special. I can do that, too. Okay? I just chose not to share them with the world because they're too good. And early 2011, Shearin independently released the extended play number five collaborations project. I was an Ed Sheariner for like 30 minutes because I loved One Direction. And when I found out that Ed Shearin wrote, what's the song?
Starting point is 00:45:05 Little Lies. If you can take a broken heart and my face. like this and I would give you all that god and we started all that song started all over over again oh my god louis verse I have chills all over my body thinking about that song I just kind of chilled on my body over again Louis part tell me of my spirit I give me an eternity
Starting point is 00:45:36 like the showers at our British whether they went together or a poem We were both removed the mosque. We went granted from this tawny. We were 10 your monkey heart. It might fit like this. This whole album is so good. Take me home.
Starting point is 00:45:56 Holy shit. Heart attack. Over again. Back for you? Wait, what was that song? I... I want to save your... Save your heart tonight.
Starting point is 00:46:12 No, no, no. No, that's from the first album. Nobody compares, truly madly, deeply. Holy shit, this is the expanded edition. This is a coveted item. Night Changes has a billion streams. I thought dragged me down had a billion streams. God, Made in the AM so good.
Starting point is 00:46:36 Oh my God, I'm still such a directioner. I'm gonna, okay, here is everyone's homework for tonight. Last episode, I think your homework was to watch Akamoran and House of Musical 2. You should have done that. didn't. Hey, Brothky Nation police, you're going to come knocking at your door. It's a mandatory viewing. Tonight's homework is you need to watch Frozen. You need to watch Hercules, and you need to listen to take me home by One Direction from start to finish, back to front, front to back. Okay? That is everyone's homework for today. What is right now? Damn, this, oh my God, I love One
Starting point is 00:47:25 Direction. What was it like, hold on, what was the T, did James Corden do? tease that I like saw something about 1D coming back together for something and I literally scrolled past it. I was like I can't verbally or like reading comprehensionally process that right now, um, nor do I want to. Like it was just a lot for me, so I just scrolled. And I didn't watch Harry and James Gordon either because I love him so much I fucking can. I can't do it. Harry Stiles Harry Stiles says I feel
Starting point is 00:48:06 Harry Stiles says he'd never say never to a one direction reunion Harry Stiles joined James Corden as a guest of the final episode of the Late Late Show on Thursday during the emotional farewell the singer addressed the possibility of a one direction reunion a comeback that was rumored
Starting point is 00:48:29 for Gordon's last episode but later dispelled During the last spill your guts or eat your guts segment on Thursday, Stiles reignited hope for a 1D reunion. Yes or no, will there be a one-direction reunion? Will it ever happen? Said Stiles, reading the question. I fear that it's not a yes or no question. I think I would never say never to that.
Starting point is 00:48:49 If there was a time when we wanted to do it, I don't see why we wouldn't. Oh my God. That's a lot. That's actually a lot for me to kind of like, yeah. Yeah. Stiles also talked about the Grammy Awards mishap during his performance when the turntable he and his dancers practice on malfunctioned and began to spin in the wrong direction. The singer said that leading up to the performance, he had been stressed about both singing and the complex choreography, saying I hadn't even thought about the idea that it might go the wrong way. Harry, that's show business, babe.
Starting point is 00:49:24 Harry, if you have questions about show business, you give me a call. You give me a call right here on my Mickey Mouse phone. Only a select few have this phone number. Walt, Disney, Mark, Zuckerberg, Elon, Musk. You know, only a few really know to reach me here. I really, really caution them against it unless it's kind of an emergency because I am recording. We're on air. We're live.
Starting point is 00:49:51 But Harry, if you have questions, you know, I can always hit pause. I can really dig in the arsenal of the archives. if you will, of knowledge and of wisdom and of advice that I can share with you about how this industry really works. So go ahead, give me a call on the Mickey Mouse landline. And under here, I also have the nuke codes. So if you need me to take care of anything,
Starting point is 00:50:15 you just let me know. I've got a little red button under here. Someone will come running in and, you know, it'll be a whole thing. So you just let me know. And, oh, wait, there's more to this article. When we finished, oh, this is him talking about the, the thing. When we finished, I was like, I'm so angry this happened. And then I thought the only thing that's going to happen is I'm going to shout at someone and it'll still be the same.
Starting point is 00:50:40 Styles continued. And then they'll think I'm a dick. I love him. I love him. Harry said, anger and violence gets us nowhere. So we can just talk it through and say, hey, why did that happen? Let's make sure it doesn't happen again. And let's maybe prepare in the future for if this does happen I love him so much. You will never, ever find a compilation of Harry Diva moments. Let's look one up. Compilation of Harry being a sassy diva. Compilation of hair styles being sassy, hair styles funny moments, hair styles being rude and roasting everyone. See, this is clickbait. Hey, never catch me. Ain't nobody going to catch me. A lot of stuff that we still want to achieve and want to...
Starting point is 00:51:23 Like what? Oh, I'm finished, but... See, this is like a joke video. Please don't take this video too seriously, she said. See, this is all just like funny, funny compilations. So I think like, I just love him. I thought I had something insightful to say. I don't. I just love him a lot. Guys, that'll kind of do it for this episode of the Brookesky, Brodsky Report. Sorry.
Starting point is 00:52:21 Excuse me. The Brookesky Report, starring me, your host, Bridie Brosky. Okay? Tune in next week because there will be another episode. Okay? You bitches are praying on my downfall. You hope there won't be another episode,
Starting point is 00:52:32 but guess what? There will be. Okay? Follow us on all the socials. We have TikTok, Instagram. That's it. We have Twitter as well, but I'm not really on Twitter.
Starting point is 00:52:44 Five stars. Go ahead and rate me five stars. If you're feeling Christian, if you're feeling inclined, if you're feeling like a kind person, if you're feeling like an evil, mean-spirited person, don't leave us five stars.
Starting point is 00:52:55 but just know that you're an evil and mean-spirited person. Subscribe on YouTube. We have a video component as well that you are totally missing out on if you're only listening to audio, guys. So come on over to the YouTube channel. You can subscribe on Spotify and Apple Podcasts. And wherever you Android people get your podcasts. We love you and appreciate you. All right, team, loving you.
Starting point is 00:53:19 Have a good week. Okay, bye. You started your business with a great. great idea and a ton of hustle. Let gotprint.com help you look the part. Grow your business by getting professional marketing that works. Need business cards before a networking event? High impact postcards for a promotion or sleek signs for your storefront. We offer a huge selection, reliable quality and low pricing. Right now, get 20% off your first order with the code podcast. So don't worry about printing. Worry about growing your business. Start today at gotprint.com
Starting point is 00:54:04 and print with confidence. I'm U.S. Transportation Secretary. Sean Duffy. The sound of a seatbelt. It's one of the most important sounds in our car. It means everyone is ready and everyone is safe. The more our kids see us put on our seatbelts, the more natural it is for them to put theirs on two. Make it a priority.
Starting point is 00:54:29 Buckle up every time. Hear the sound? Make it a habit. Paid for by NHTSA. Struggling to see up close, make it visible with Viz. This is a once daily prescription eye drop to treat blurry near vision for up to 10 hours. The most common side effects that may be experienced while using biz include eye irritation, temporary, dimmer, dark vision, headaches, and eye redness. Talk to an eye doctor to learn if Viz is right for you. Learn more at Viz.com.

There aren't comments yet for this episode. Click on any sentence in the transcript to leave a comment.