The Bugle - Afghanistan in a zen state of chaos

Episode Date: February 11, 2008

The 16th ever Bugle podcast, from 2008. Written and presented by Andy Zaltzman and John Oliver.This is a classic episode from The Bugle, to support us, and to keep the Bugle alive and free of ads, please visit http://thebuglepodcast.com/ Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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Hello, welcome to issue number 16 of the Bugle the Unique Audio News Paper from TimesOnline.co.uk for the week beginning Monday the 11th of February! With me, Andy Zoltzman, Inlandon and in New York City, Mr John Oliver. Hello Bugleers, that's New Amsterdam, Andy. New Amsterdam. I don't recognise the new name of this city. If it's good enough for the Dutch, it's good enough for me. What is true with cheese is true with anything else. Also, happy 16th anniversary to all the Bugles. It's our Switch 16 and in true MTV style, we're demanding that you throw us a disgustingly lavish party, hire Jay-Z to perform and buy some assaides. Otherwise, you must not love us.

As always, some sections of the Bugle go straight in the bin, this week, on the 200th anniversary of this first experimental burning of anthracite as a residential heating fuel, here's a commemorative sound effect of a piece of anthracite being thrown through a window and hitting the Duke of Ed and Ruff flush on his bones. Also in the bin, the chess section, a special feature on the move, Knights to King 4. Celebrity singer, Placido Domingo tell us what it means to him. And also an interview with the chess obsessed Bishop of Kloppenberg in Germany who only walks diagonally and moved house so he can live next door to a horse.

Top story this week, Afghanistan. Top Story This Week Afghanistan NATO Defence Ministers moved quickly this week to dismiss talk of a crisis over the operations in Afghanistan. They were at pain to admit that life in Afghanistan is still vastly better than when under Taliban control. But let's be fair, it's still partly under Taliban control and anyway it could scarcely have gotten worse When you essentially live on a scorched rock under a brutally repressive regime and you merely remove the brutal part You still live under a repressive regime and you still live on a scorched rock whose major export is the opium poppy

whole sweet home Well, it does turn out according to NATO that Afghanistan is fine Well, it does turn out, according to NATO, that Afghanistan is fine. The rumours that it's been going even more tits up, and everyone thought it turned out to be lies. And this emerged on the week that David Miliband and Condoleezza Rice went to Kabul on a kind of political dirty weekend. Apparently, they're frustrated there in ability to galvanize the supposed allies to throw more troops at the problem. And the Afghano-Stani warlocks were exerting an increasingly tight grip around the spluttering jugular of an already out of breath nation.

It seems that it's hard to rebuild a place that was never really built in the first place. And in 2001, world leaders assured Afghanistan that we would be with them for the long run. What we didn't realise was quite how long that run would be, or indeed that it ran straight off a cliff. Robert Gates said he thought there was no risk of failure, but in many ways that's true because you can't file it something if you don't know what success is. What is success in Afghanistan? No one really knows. Therefore, Afghanistan is approaching an almost zen state of chaos. There can be neither success or failure. Afghanistan just is.

There may be a lesson for a rack in this new violent offshoot of Buddhism. But I'm not sure that anyone could really have predicted that this Afghanistan war proved so difficult. I guess there were some clues that suggested it, it might be trickier than everyone expected, including a, the first Anglo-Afghan war from 1839 to 1842, reviewed by the critics at the time as an unmitigated disaster.

The British retreat of 1842 began with 16,000 people. One man made it and he had part of his head missing. Clubi, the Soviet Afghan war from 1979 to 1989, was so debilitated the mighty Moscow machine that communism collapsed, exhausted at the end of it and said, no more, I just want the pain to stop. Or see any other wars in the history of Afghanistan. Apart from those clues, there was nothing to say it was going to be difficult. It looks easy on a map. It does, but then that map is sketchy at best. You do have to assume that the map doesn't have

any pictures of mountains on it as well. There is real suspicion of the British in Afghanistan for many valid reasons which go back hundreds of years. In fact, some Afghan parents reportedly tell their children to be good or the British will get you as if we're not the equivalent of the bogeyman. Which historically of course we probably are. Their current suspicion is over a $150,000 camp which we've set up to teach insurgents about human rights and the Afghan constitution. It's a rival camp to terrorist camps and maybe this is where

the real battleground lies now, who has the best camp. We've seen from their videos that they have those swinging monkey bars and scramble nets so so maybe we should get a seesaw, a slide, and a ping pong table. Maybe a camp fighter to touch marshmallows on. That's always fun. The British know how to organise a good camp, Andy. We can do it here. It's interesting, see that Afghanistan produces 90% of the world's opium, a record-cropist Jew this year.

Opium fans are now hoping that opium can retake its position as the opiate of the masses for the first time since 1844 when it was overtaken by religion according to then opiate referee Karl Marx. It's opium fans is a far nicer way of saying heroin addict, doesn't it? He's a real, he's a die-hard opium fan before it was fashionable. Off and everything. Rack around his own, needlessly tightly. But more than half of Afghanistan's GDP comes from drugs. This is a timely reminder of this story that the coalition of the willing, or the coalition of the willing coerced and misguided to give us a full title, we're not just about to rack. Yes, we caused a mess there, but we've

caused messes all around the world, which we're receiving little or no credit for. And there has been some finger pointing from NATO nations such as the US and Britain at other NATO nations who've arguably not been doing much to help militarily over there. Namely, you've guessed it, France, Italy, Spain and Germany. And the German Defence Ministry spokesman made a strange comment saying, I think people in Britain should be aware that we lost two world wars and we have a different attitude to the question of soldiers, wars and blood. It's a really strange thing to say. Two little two like.

Not only is that true, but also let's not compete over who lost the most lives in those two continental meltdowns. It's not a competition. It was, and what a competition it was, But in many ways, the big loser in the first half of the 20th century was humanity. But Rob Gates, the US defense secretary, in between cheering defense, defense defense at the US infantry in far away Iraq, in an effort to improve military morale. He promised a nag his NATO allies in an effort to get them to pledge more troops. So America's kind of like a domineering wife, but it's always wanted to be. It's quite interesting terminology. I

think Rumsels actually still thinks of the Iraq Wars a high tech and explosive form of nagging, but the problem is what does nagging generally cause resentment. Take that from me, John. That's why my bedroom's untidy, and that's one my tax returns on my desk. He's actually still true. It's sadly still true. Oh dear. God's news now and Archbishop of Canterbury Rowne Williams has called for British law to be replaced with an extreme version of Islamic Sharia law. Or at least that's how it seems to be reported in some parts of the British press. I don't know what you think of this, John, I'm not sure really that Williams as the head of the Church of England should be calling for Muslim order to be falsely imposed on all British people. Well, that's right, he definitely shouldn't be doing that, that's really why he hasn't.

Yeah, I guess that's the one good thing about it. I mean, that's the one that it's cold comfort though. The Archbishop is a philosophical and deeply intelligent man who clearly has made the big mistake this week of making a thoughtful and decisive statement about life in multicultural Britain. And you may have seen headlines such as Archbishop says, Sharia law in Britain is inevitable when what he actually said was that the UK would have to face up to the fact that some of its citizens do not relate to the British legal system and that allowing parts of Sharia

law might help social cohesion. That's just not the kind of behaviour you want from a religious leader Andy. He can take his message of inclusion and put it right back in the Communist manifesto which I'm sure he secretly keeps inside his Bible. We all know what you're really reading, Mr Williams. If that is your real name, drop the act, take off the fake cover. Williams did actually say that an approach to law, which simply said quotes, there's one law for everybody, and that's all there is to be said.

And anything else that commands your loyalty or allegiance is completely irrelevant. I think that's a bit of a danger. Now, that, to me, seems a little bit rich coming from a religious leader, given the lack of flexibility traditionally exhibited by religion and the whole burning in hell after life business. But of course, he probably isn't one of those men. That's the ridiculous thing in this situation. And he said that sensational reporting of opinion polls had clouded this issue, a comment which in turn filled victim to the sensational reporting pandemic, which is currently sweeping the British Isles. You cannot trust the British press with a comment like that, that is like

giving a child a tambourine, they're going to waggle it around and they're going to hurt someone with it. So the cult secretary Andy Burnham said you cannot run two systems of law alongside each other, he said this would be chaos, although he should perhaps bear in mind that we already do in fact run two systems of law in parallel, trial by jury and trial by media. In fact, the former is being rendered increasingly obsolete by the latter and current predictions do suggest that all trials will be carried out by media within 30 years, so hopefully it will clear any confusion up. It must be very tempting for the Archbishop to look at how this story has been reported

and then release a second statement saying, do you know what, you can all go f**k yourselves, I'm going to heaven anyway. America is no longer Mitt Romney. The race away from the White House continues this week with the news that Mitt Romney has dropped his bid to be president, and this is terrible news for nobody. The final tally is that Romney paid exactly $1.16 million per delegate, and that's a lot of money for what works out as nothing. He has spent a huge amount of his own money on this pipe dream.

It is a vanity project spent a huge amount of his own money on this pipe dream. It is a vanity project on a huge scale. Some people self-published their novels, Mitt Romney ran for leader of the free world. That is Sam Hobby. He needs to get himself a shed. I think what it does show, John, is that Mitt Romney, who of course we did a little potted biog of two weeks ago on the bugle, has fallen first victim of the curse of the bugle. Every presidential candidate we've done a potted bog of has pulled out within a fortnight. Admittedly Romney is the only one, but that is still 100%. So I think we are now basically, we are the kingmakers in this presidential race, John. We just need to hold back our pocket biogs of the remaining candidates, you know, Obama,

Clinton, McCain, Huckabee and Mike Gravel hang in there, Mike. Do them as and when we see fit and we have the future of the world. If we really hold off and we become kingmaker, we might even be able to wangle ourselves in a turning general position. The key rule with leaving the presidential races when you go out, go out with some class. And what a speech Romney gave, including such ear-catching sound bites as America is the most powerful nation in the history of the earth. I beg your pardon, Miss. In the history of the earth, take that claim to the Romans, give it two minutes and their

lines will be using you as a toothpick. Let's forget, the sun never set on the British Empire. You've artificially enhanced your wit as a nation with Hawaii, and that's not a state that's somewhere to get shipwrecked. At best. In a speech littered with contempt for large swathes of humanity, perhaps his most striking comment was this. If I fight on in my campaign, all the way to the convention, I would force store the launch of a national campaign and make it more likely that Senator Clinton or Obama

would win, and in this time of war, I simply cannot let my campaign be a part of aiding a surrender to terror. That's right, you heard him correctly, he essentially just labeled 50 million Americans terrorists. And if that's true, when suggesting doubling Guantanamo, he was really low-polling us on national security. We need triple Guantanamo with bunk beds. The real fact is that Mitt Romney's true colours came splattering through during that speech,

and the speech really couldn't have been more revealing, unless at the end he pulled his own face off to reveal a sinister robot underneath, muttering have not been programmed to lose. Romney is the bullet which just whizzed past America's ear. And after the speech there was a collective cyber relief as a nation as one found itself saying, that was close. Romney also reached out his message of hate to the rest of the world as well and he said, I'm convinced that unless America changes course, we will become the France of the 21st century. Presumably he means that America will like well-cooked but over rich food,

stylish but flaky rugby. And will be casually disliked by large sections of the British population for historical reasons they don't fully understand. So, welcome to the future, America. What will that make France though if it can no longer be the France of the 21st century? Well I think it's a knock on effect France then become the Belgium and essentially someone gets bumped off the planet. Right, probably Burundi. In Bigotry News this week a poster claiming that gay people want to abolish the family has been criticized by an advertising watchdog. The Christian Congress for traditional values,

traditional medieval values, that must be. I had an advert which showed a man, a woman, a boy, and a girl with a statement underneath, gay aim abolished the family. Here is the beauty of the situation. Under the rules of advertising, there has to be an element of truth in the claim to prevent advertisers saying things like red wine can make you fly, which has led to the advertising standards agency ruling that the Christian organisation could not make that claim stand up. I'll return that ruling. They would have to prove in court that abolishing the family is indeed a gay aim. That is a court case. I would frankly pay to sit. Oh, I'm pretty sure it is, John. And if you'll explain what the homosexualists have been trying to do all along. The taxpayer spends millions, millions on things like the various OJ Simpson trials and assorted

corporate fraud cases. It would be nice if we finally got something you could really sit back and enjoy. And it's always good to see bigotry confronted by the cold hard hand of law so they can realise just how moronic their views are. I think this is really what the homosexualist campaign has been about all along. I mean, it's not been particularly effective the gay campaign, gay's had less effect of it breaking out families than other campaign groups such as heterosexuals, lawyers and pushy employers. I did a bit of research into what the other gay aims are. Here are a few that I've found, want to make the perfect pile.

Two, to abolish the crop top. And three, to locate and extricate Russell and Bowles' mythic redeeming feature. Are you going to give an explanatory note for a British and global listeners on that, John? So if you know of any of the other secret aims of the gayY! Please email us in, the bugle at TimesOnline.co.uk. BUU a lot for the life of one of God's own creatures, albeit not one of his favourite creatures, nor one of his better creatures. But it must be pretty psychologically tough for the chicken, you know, to go through what passes for their life, only to have a £1.99 transfer fee slapped on their ass. How does that make them feel about themselves? Of course, they're not going to be that tasty if they're treated like that. That doesn't help with your self-esteem to be valued like that. Now Tesco's

media director in between Cackling Lock and Demon stated that no one should feel guilty buying a chicken just because it's good value. Well here's the thing, yes you should. You should at the very least be concerned if someone offered to sell you a car for £20, your initial response would be what's wrong with it. Not that sounds like unexpectedly good value you have yourself a deal and it's the same with the £2 chicken. The question should be what's wrong with it because the answer is pretty much everything. A lot of these very cheap chickens are different halves of crashed chickens welded together. The National Farmers Union said that Tesco's move was ill-judged and short-sighted and Tesco's response to the traditional super market response

so any complaint from farmers, do you guys want to earn a living? Do you really? Do you want to come here and say that? So it looks like they will probably win. Tesco say the reduction is only in price not in welfare on the grounds that it would be impossible to reduce the welfare. This might be that this is irrelevant anyway because the FDA announced a couple of weeks ago that cloned meat is safe for human consumption. So just after a decade, when the first animal was cloned, the last major barrier to meat and milk being sold to people has been removed.

The FDA announced that you probably wouldn't eat a cloned animal directly as they're too expensive, though. Not sure if expense would be people's biggest psychological barrier there. I tell you what has no place at the dinner table and that is the adrenaline rush of the bungee jump. I don't want to raise a fork of meat to my mouth and feel like someone should be photographing me so I can look back and remember how brave I was. A cloning like John is one of those

trigger words that provokes ill-informed knees to jerk around like the headless chickens it promises to produce, like nuclear power and immigration. But I'm a bit worried you know and we've seen what happens in films with cloning. Today they clone me tomorrow they're clone Hitler and I for one do not want to have to eat cloned Hitler not not even if they're free range Hitler's. In fact, not especially not if they're free range Hitler's, then in fact the most dangerous type. If only Hitler himself had been battered from the world would be a much happier place today.

At vegetarian's also have a very tricky call to make here because if it's being grown, is that not technically a plant? And it's good to eat plants. And it means that a plate of festering genetically engineered meat is under the rules of science basically a salad and we should all eat more salad. And now a bugle restaurant review this week I went to the postulentia in Cragswick Hampshire. My companion and I sat down to dinner on cycling themed seats. Mine was based on a model of a bike used by Jacques Angatille when he won the Tour de France in 1957, then melted down,

reconstituted and shaped like a chair. My partner's bostiri was less fortunate, plonked down on a pile of hypodermic syringes and some excuse notes. We ordered frantically as if our meals depended on it, then watched in horror as our waiter, the former World Lightweight Boxing Champion Roberto Giran, got our orders mixed up, trash talked the neighbouring table, and knocked at a young boy with a savage flurry of punches to the ribs and chin. Eventually my starter, a scrimmage of kidnap vegetables, with tuna-friendly breadsticks, arrived in a taxi with its new girlfriend, Hillary Swank. The dish was, without question, one of the most edible things

I've ever eaten, and tasted like the broken promise of a rogue aunt. My companions or derved asked for and took no prisoners, enough said. For main course, I'd ordered the dead salmon. The poor little fish's lifeless flesh was served with an intimidatory source of recently assassinated welks and heat tortured potatoes. Overwhelmed by the blood-curdlingly moving tale of its preparation, I could not bring myself to eat it. Instead, I lovingly embalmed it, boxed it up like a Valentine's Day puppy, and posted it to the chef's parents, so they might become aware of the creative killer they had spawned. My companion by contrast played safe and went

for the hackings of faux dynosore with a side order of non-existent spinach on the hollow echoing laughter of a secretly anguished nun all served in the preserved skull of a native Welsh tiger. But my companion is on a diet so she took a polaroid photo of her dish, ate the photo and shot the food whilst accusing it of ruining her teenage years. Our meal was served with liquefied grapes which had been trampled and fermented beyond recognition to the extent that it had to be administered via a bottle, expertly catheterised by the onsite urologist. A glass of water was also provided, insensitively containing some novelty miniature icebergs,

just 96 years after the Titanic took 1500 and two food fans of their icy graves. They then followed the in-meal flight, a somewhat uncomfortable 48 hour round trip to Buenos Aires, in a quadruple engine World War II Malcovia's clown plane. For dessert, the wolf and gravel sorbet was just the lethal disappointment we'd been hoping for. Whilst the sacred profiterol of Jampusula was literally divine, the chef's complimentary at-table self-imulation lent the disassler roma of burning brandy and human flesh. If I had one criticism of an otherwise unforgettable evening, it was the restaurants use of cheap labour to make our coffee. By the time our

cappuccino said arrived in the sweatshop in Pnom Penh, made by locally-sourced children, they had cooled beyond acceptability. The matriety fired us home from his cannon with a friendly bang, although whose excellent food had altered our ballistic properties, and we fell a mile short of our destination in the one part of Britain still controlled by the Vietcong, all in all four stars ideal for a first date. That has raised the bar of lying to an almost surgey pubca level. Well, if you can tell us how many lies were in that restaurant of you. Don't, don't do it.

I don't think you physically can. You will win a complimentary lie. And now it's time for your emails. There's a great email from Corey Hawkins who responded to our suggestion of stop and search over this week and Corey writes, at your behest I stopped myself and searched my person yesterday at 8.15 pm eastern time. this week and Corey writes, on the searching of oneself. I almost caught an armed criminal and almost kept my neighbourhood safer. Almost. Congratulations, Corey, you're one of America's local heroes. It's interesting that Corey should have taken those measures because Ross Ballinger, aged 16, from Cheltenham in the United Kingdom, writes, After listening to your podcast in the library during a free period,

I decided to follow your advice and perform a search of myself as soon as I could. Unfortunately due to recent exam stress, it was not until this search that I discovered a small nuclear warhead tapped at the back of my leg that I'd previously overlooked. I have no idea how it got there, but I could do without the stigma of somehow smuggling a warhead into school, so I shoved it into the nearest locker and legged it. But if it's primed and closed the locker apart and has my fingerprints on it, I'm holding you personally responsible for triggering the discovery of dangerous weapons in the first place. David Cameron was right, right, Rose. These searches are nothing but trouble. This email will serve as proof of that.

Shame on you, buglers. And controversy has hit Hotties from History, due to an email from Kalina Kaffiralla in Melbourne, Australia. She writes, I found the Hotties from History somewhat underwhelming. Are you truly human? What criteria were you using to choose these Hotties from History, she writes, I cannot see the common thread between any of these nominees, except they are dead. Let's have some transparency in the nominations.

Well, I don't know where. Up against the wall here, John. I don't think that is a valid criticism. These Hotties transcend being alive or dead. Joanna the Mad is the perfect example there we had a couple of pictures of her emailed in one The email said I've been closed a photo of the infamous Joanna the mad though one does not recognize the flaming madness upon first glance She does appear to be carrying some unexplained rage in those crazy eyes of her and unexplained rage in those crazy eyes of hers. And they're intoxicating eyes, and then Sarah wrote,

wow, thanks for the tip, John. Joanna the Mad is not only pretty, but my friend Aaron insists that crazy girls are better in bed, and then she advises, I'd hit it. So, I guess in response to your email about Transparency and nominations, anyone can be nominated, because one man's hotty

is another man's naughty. And that applies as much to historical hotties and notties as living ones. It's true. It's true, Andy. And it rhymes. So it must be true. The best of the rest of your emails will be rounded up in this week's Bugal blog, Apologies for the absence of last week's Bugal blog. This was due to the cruel hand of fate and me being busy. To keep your emails coming into the Bugal at timesonline.co.uk the only email address of any relevance in the modern world. Sport now and congratulations to the New England Patriots. Yes, 18 and 1 Yes, 18 and 1, baby. 18 and 1.

For having the courage to fail at the last hurdle, glorious failure as we Brits know is infinitely more of a success than actual success. And whether Miami Dolphins had let us down by winning a game, the Patriots did not let us down by losing with 30 seconds to go. What do you think of the key factors in that game, John? Well, the key factor, Andy, was clearly the play for the ages, third and five, Eli Manning, visibly sacked, and yet somehow emerging from the back of the pack, like a man in a heronimous Bosch painting, throwing an absolute bomb, which was then caught with one hand pressed against a helmet.

What a play! What a play, Andy. The best recovery from a sacking probably since the Relics of Roman Civilisation managed to influence the entire future of the West after the Visigoths had got all over them, also ironically at a third down. I was at the ticker tape parade earlier this week and Ely Manning had the worst case of poor booking in terms of speeches because he's actually a very quiet,

unassuming man which is straight for a sport which has such titanic egos in it. Michael Strayhan who is a loud man, he went on before Manning and was screaming at the crowd, we stomped you out in New England, we stomped you out. And then Eli came up and the first thing he said was, I told them not to put me on after Michael. As a stand-up, I could really sympathise with the guy, you're right, you're in trouble here Eli. There's no gig left in this room. NFL films are always shoot stuff fantastically and they had a half hour package. In fact I've recorded it and he's

so to show you when you come over here next week. You'll love it. And so it's got the mics up on certain people. So you can hear the referees talking to each other during the game saying things like, oh this is quite a good game isn't it? It's really good on. I don't know how it's playing at home but it's pretty exciting. And the speeches beforehand, the Patres were talking to each other Yeah, it's really good on. I don't know how it's playing at home, but it's pretty exciting. And the speeches beforehand, the Patreons were talking to each other saying, let's not take this for granted, let's go out there and win. Pretty arrogance and confidence. And the giants were saying to each other, we've been dreaming about this since we were little boys. As if I couldn't be any more glad that the giants had won, to see

them acting like that made it even sweeter. But it's so sweet it's almost diabetic level this victory. I guess if at any point in your team talk you say we don't want to take this for granted you are already taking it for granted. Absolutely. Very much like Iraqi democracy. Football news and real football this time the premiership are discussing taking football matches overseas. Following the success of the NFL's jaunt to play a really low quality game at Wembley last October, Premiership Football is going to take a round of games every year overseas.

If these plans go through football of course is only played in England, so it's very important if football wants to reach beyond England that it plays games and countries where there's never been any football. So hit these guys are heroic pioneers. What they mustn't do is bother coming over here Andy because they have proven year after year they couldn't care less about football. Don't flock this dead horse, it's already been popped. Making this debate more complicated, the art fisherman can't be run Williams has said that all football should be played under the sharia of side rule. And now it's time for the much praised and maligned bugle audio crossword.

It's an audience divider. This week's clue is 16 down and after the resounding success of last week's two-part clue, this also has two clues for the same answer. It's eight letters, the answer is split into two words of three and five. And this is a fairly simple clue. And it's, do this if you want to know how to pull off a giant killing. And the other clue is this. This is the start of apocalypse. An opera star that has fallen over backwards after 500 kilos of sulphur went up. What should we do?

Request advice from the leader of the Conservatives. Is anyone still listening? I'm not. I don't know about anyone else. And instead of the bugle prediction this week, we have a free gift. It's Valentine's Day this week as romantic Bugle listeners won't need any reminding. And so as a free gift, here are some Bugle chat-up lines to win the heart of your desired. Wow, could you do me a favor and pick my jaw off the floor? Now call an ambulance and implement some proper workplace safety standards. Your father must be a thief because you've been here to visit him every week for the past 18 months.

Now don't try hiding a knife in his birthday cake this year. You must be a witch because I'm under your spell and boiling to death in your cauldron. What? You're not a witch? Just a straight down the line cannibal. My mistake. If that doesn't work, try this one. What's your father of Champions League semi-final? Because you've got two legs. And finally, the classic bugle chat up line. There was something I wanted to say.

No, you go first. OK, I'll go first. Sorry, this is a bit awkward. It's just that really, I mean, since I met you, you're a what? And I think what we learn from that is you're married to better work out otherwise you are dying alone. So good luck, Google Valentiners and do join us again for next week's show. Also check the website for all the added Bugle goodies, times online.co.uk slash the Bugle

and email us in with anything particularly if it's a hot-eaten history. Interestingly with next week's show it will be the first time that Andy and I have been in the same place for an episode of the Bugle. Let's see what that lack of 3,000 miles distance does. It'll be very interesting to see what it's like when we are merely one foot apart, even closer. So put your bets on, will we come to blows? Bye! Cheerio!

Thank you.