The Bugle - Time to Gargle

Episode Date: August 9, 2022

Andy introduces an episode of The Gargle, a fine show from The Bugle team, subscribe to it here: https://pod.link/Gargle. In this episode Tiff Stevenson and James Colley join host Alice Fraser for the... weekly topical comedy podcast - with no politics!Please do come and see The Bugle live this autumn: https://www.thebuglepodcast.com/live Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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Starting point is 00:00:00 Dancelaguard fans, you will be thrilled to know a book is coming out if you fund it via Unbound. We are publishing the Dancelaguard Reader by Alice Fraser and Dancelaguard, a glorious insight into the world of Dancelaguard, self-published romance maven, and online bestseller. If you would like to find out how to support it, go to thebugelpodcast.com. If we get enough support, we will publish the book. That's a real thing that's going to happen. Thebugelpodcast.com to a real thing that's going to happen. TheBuglePodcast.com to support the Danciler Guard Reader. The Bugle, audio newspaper for a visual world.
Starting point is 00:00:42 Audio newspaper for a visual world! Hello, Bugles! I am Andy Zoltzmann and welcome to Bugle issue 4,237 summer hiatus sub summer episode B The second of our quite literally august offerings to Ty Dover until we return at the end of the month This week in the absence of the Bugle we turn to our glamorous sister publication the Gargle magazine, to the bugles, unrelenting heavy news journalism barrage of facturitiveness. The Gargle is concocted and hosted by Alice Fraser, and you can currently see Alice performing at the Edinburgh Festival, along with numerous other bugle co-hosts, due to their shows, preferably having border tickets and laugh at them, and then tell them that they are your favourite bugle co-host of all time. And to do also buy your tickets for the Bugle 15th anniversary live shows now via the live
Starting point is 00:01:29 bit of the Bugle website, there's a little live button at the top you can click or or elsewhere. My website and his often.com.uk should link to it as well if I'll set it up right which is a big if and it also has details of my November satirist for higher bonus extension dates. Coming later in the hiatus, we will have the best of the bin highlights from the chunks of the audio newspaper that frankly no one was ever going to read. If you have a particularly favourite section in the bin that you'd like to hear again, do let us know either by shouting it into the ether or preferably via our social media channels, tweet us at hello viewglas
Starting point is 00:02:03 or do something else that might work. Right, open wide, it's time to tick on your taste buds with the latest episode of The Gargle. This is a podcast from The Bugle. It's opening night of the end of a friend you've been working on this show for months. This is a podcast from The Bugle. for the love of the audience together enough scraps to feed your own fragile self-esteem for just one more day. Nothing could distract you from your goal. On the day of opening night every fragment of your mind and will and joke-writing ability must be bent to one task only. And that task is... The Gaggle! The only satirical news podcast that's tears entirely clear of the iceberg of politics while bringing you the latest news from technology,
Starting point is 00:03:01 beauty, arts, archaeology, sport, animals doing weird shit and real estate listings. This is the Gagel, the Sonic glossy magazine, the Bugles, or your newspaper for visual world. I'm your host, Alice Fraser, and the guest editors for this week's edition are rolling into the club flinging money around like a Kanye. Tip Stevenson, hello! Hi! Yeah, I just threw hot dollars at you as I came into the hotel room. Yeah, why did you heat them up? I just feel it's when you're having money thrown at you, it's nicer for it to just be at least room temp. And a human weather board, James Colley, how are you?
Starting point is 00:03:37 I'm feeling the embellish right now where one of us gets to be a money flinging candy and the others on weather board. Not even a nice bit of scrap wood. Now a bunch of bits of scrap wood pressed together through the force of love. I mean, a hotel room with a tip which is exciting, it's exciting. I don't think the gargles have ever been, because we started during the pandemic, I don't think we've ever been in the room with one of my guests. No, we've never gargled at each other. No, I mean, that sounds like a horrible sex tape that no one wants to watch. You think no one wants to watch it, but if you've
Starting point is 00:04:10 learned anything from the internet, it's that someone always wants to watch it. Oh, yeah, yep, we just got a thumbs up from James. Oh, I was responding to a producer query, but that's also a wonderful time to go by. In just a minute, we will link arms and do the Hoverna Gila into this week's top stories, but first, let's take a look at the front cover. This week's front cover is a candid shot of Dev Patel breaking up a fight outside a nightclub in South Australia proving that you are correct to have a crush on him. Correct. I think he's the inverse Ezra Miller at this point.
Starting point is 00:04:47 And Dev Patel, you know, Dev Patel, Collie, do you have a crush on him? Of course, but like, but also this was like firstly, congratulations on the complete Adelaide experience. The witnessing a crime in Adelaide is just, it's like the first time you get honked at in New York, you know, it's just welcome to the city you're in. The strangest part of this story for me was that Dev Patel lives in Adelaide. Like I breached past the Adelaide stabbing part, I think it's just nice to make a London to feel at home. And I went straight to...he didn't Adelaide, he lives in Adelaide because every decade Adelaide gets a celebrity. Last decade it was Ben Folt. This decade is different.
Starting point is 00:05:26 They are stepping up. Does he live in Adelaide or was he just in Adelaide? He lives in Adelaide. I mean no one lives in Adelaide. No, I thought he would be there for filming. Apparently he's lived there for a year which should have been a story every day on Adelaide use from the day he moved into now. Dev Patel still here. I mean this is the thing. First of all, I thought Adelaide use from the day he moved into it now. Dev Patel still here. I mean, this is the thing. First of all, I thought Adelaide was getting a nuclear submarine facility. That was what, that was the big news about what was moving into Adelaide.
Starting point is 00:05:55 And they didn't mention that the nuclear submarine facility was Dev Patel. And this wasn't during the clip-soul. No, not during the clip-soul. Is there just like a year-round, Argybhaji? Oh, yes. Am I allowed to say Argybhaji, actually? What's the etymology of that phrase? Is it to do with Argyntina?
Starting point is 00:06:13 I'm not saying it. I don't think Argybhaji is racist. No, it's a classic civil war between Argyntina and Argyntina. I think it's, yeah, Argyntina. It's got to do with the Panama Canal and when a boat gets stuck. I don't know. This week's satirical cartoon is a picture of Liz Truss and that's all. She's a self-saturizing entity. Sticker in a room alone with a mirror and she'll sue herself for making it full of herself.
Starting point is 00:06:41 I thought you was gonna say it's a picture of her in a port market. I mean, it could be anywhere, just anywhere. I just feel like Liz Truss is inherently just a lady Boris, right? That's why they want her, right? We're silly to China! I'm sorry. The end of the video. Top story this week,
Starting point is 00:06:58 dead spider robot news. This is the news of the emerging field, the horrifyingly emerging from your nightmares field of necrobotics whereby some scientists again Let's not ask why have figured out that by blowing air into dead spiders you can make them pick things up like a skill tester Like a terrifying horrifying horrifying skill tester. Yeah, that looks like what you get the claw in an arcade Yeah, that grabs a minion for you. Yeah. Except this will make children cry.
Starting point is 00:07:27 LAUGHTER James, you're a terrifying spider from people's nightmares. Can you unpack this story? Well, look, you can't say this in our PC culture. But I am an arachnophob. I just don't like them. They could attribute nothing to the economy. They should not be allowed to marry.
Starting point is 00:07:45 I am an arachnophone, and I'm sick of hiding. I like being very well researched from this show. I didn't click on this because I did for a second, and there was a video, and then I tried another article, and there was a GIF, and I don't want either of those in my life at all, so I would like to direct this next comment to the wonderful roving reporter who sent this in. F**k you, go f**k yourself, f**k you,
Starting point is 00:08:09 and everyone associated with you. My thoughts on this are fairly simple. Don't, do not f**king, don't, and I don't think that it's enough that we have ethics boards any more for scientific experiments. I think we need an Eldritch horror committee where we have like a Stephen King sits there.
Starting point is 00:08:29 Yeah, we have a nice shovel on there. Any experiment that seems like something that would happen in the first act of one of their stories, you're not allowed to do that anymore. Sorry, it's not worth it. We have skill testers. We already had skill testers.
Starting point is 00:08:44 You just made them worse. Yeah, I feel like what you need, what you need is a kind of a grant board slash pitch meeting in which if one of these horror writers says yes, everyone else says no. So if a M-line is like, oh, that gives me an idea, you're like, oh, we're not giving you any money at all. But we will green light this project. Yeah yeah it can go to one or the other I mean necrobiotic I've never even heard the word it just sounds like a 90s band yeah no like technotronic yes necrobotic on top of the pops well it's necrobotics like robotics of the dead right yeah it's it's it's it's necrobotics, like robotics of the dead, right? Yeah. Well, it's something you get for drinking your cool-tie believe.
Starting point is 00:09:27 You get some necrobotics. This is so upsetting. Tiff, would you get a skill test made out of a dead spider? No, it gets metinecrobial when they use a dead spider to grip and then pick up another dead spider. That was a very upsetting moment in the video. He was the video. He was the video. He's the thing or brave. Yeah, James. Yeah, I watched the full thing. Here's what I think. Female spiders get a bad rap. Years ago I did a show at the
Starting point is 00:09:55 fringe called Along Came A Spider and what I learned was some male spiders are very tricky, right? As part of the mating ritual, what male spiders do is they get a parcel of food like a gift for the female spider so they can have sex with her, right? Yeah, you know, just like watching the Kardashians. So basically, they wrap the present up in silk with the web, you know, and deliver it to the female spider, but what I found out is sometimes they trick the female spider and it's just a bundle of silk with no food parcel inside it and then they have sex and then they leave and then they trick another female spider like an eight-legged Tristan Thompson
Starting point is 00:10:36 What? F*** boys spiders! Yes! I mean that is the word, like as though you were already scared enough of spiders slash men. Yeah, there's just a female spider left there going all these eyes and never saw it come in. I feel this is bad for the spider. It's making it harder for all other male spiders out there by running this game. Running this scam. It's always just the one bad apple.
Starting point is 00:11:03 Yeah, the one bad spider. One bad spider living in a terrible apple. That sounds like a good kids book. In my opinion, there has only been one good spider and it was Charlotte from Charlotte's web and it's not because she wrote wonderful things in the web. It's because she f**king died. There are no good spiders.
Starting point is 00:11:19 Are they good spider men? There's one, but he's in a specific neighborhood and it was Toby Boy. Oh, hello. There's an old Australian phrase that Alice wrote, which is, I'm not here to f*** spiders. And frankly, I would prefer if every one of these scientists was there to f*** the spiders that would be less disturbing to me, be like, I'm not going to yuck your yum, go through your life, just don't bring them back to life.
Starting point is 00:11:48 Your ad section now, because you can't be what you can't buy. And this episode of The Podcast is brought to you by Americans sitting in the cafe next to you. American sitting in the cafe next to you. The podcast you can't turn off. They're just so... They're just so American all the time. And this episode of The Podcast is brought to you by the newest hot social media app to steal your time and attention and then return them to you in the form of ads for things that you think you'll like.
Starting point is 00:12:18 Bringing you Hotbox! While this week met the Facebook of the internet reported a 1% decline in their quarterly revenue. Hotbox will never report a 1% decline because it's just a room where you go to find out about global warming statistics. Hotbox, the most factual, least social media. And a new novel is out by self-published romance maven at online Best Silla, Dansey Lagarde. The 13th in the sexy nights of the round table series of a historical fiction with a supernatural twist, the night and the spring is a tale
Starting point is 00:12:51 of swords, chivalry and hydration. Calagrinant is a night of the round table. I'm sorry. I'm making that up. What? Calagrinant. Calagrinant? That sounds like a brand of oven cleaner. Normally, I make up names and they make me laugh. This is a real name before the real nights of the round table, if you think the nights of the round table are real. And how could they make up a name like that? It has to be a real name.
Starting point is 00:13:18 Callagrinant is a night of the round table, astonishingly powerful and rich, celebrated by his peers. You would think you could forget his difficult childhood as the unloved son of a distant Welsh lords daughter and a billionaire wizard from the future, who ignored the prime directive of time travel, which is not to f***. Kilogren and was half brought up by nooms a shameful secret for a noble night because of racism, but the past doesn't forget you that quickly and when Kilogren and his drawn into a quest that challenges his nightly honour, he refuses to refuse. Blessendoll is a blonde medieval bombshell with deep toe-coys eyes, a shaved hairline, and
Starting point is 00:13:51 boobs to match. Her skin is so pale she could be hired out at night on the highways as a reflected cat's eye. She's everything one could want in a medieval hottie, but her translucent skin hides a dark secret. She offended a witch in a well and has been condemned to the fate of becoming attempting Naird until freed by True Love's first bang. Yes, she's the spirit of a local water course, and if you get her wet she becomes the elemental force of every middleweight stream and gushes everywhere. When local highwaymen get access to a magical stone that gives them the
Starting point is 00:14:18 power to control numbs, Kellogrenend is summoned to deal with the goblin problem. But can he bring himself to attack the people who gave him the only love he ever knew as a small half-Lord, half-time traveler and who's this mysteriously glistening pale dame with ideas about no-mequality? Find out when you read the night and the spring this summer. I just so happen to have a copy of Lamort D'Artha here. And just sticking through,
Starting point is 00:14:41 try to find colloquial. I'm sorry. Didn't appear in the glossary strangely enough, but actually having looked through this now, this guy can't spell for shit. This is ruined by an absolute Rube. He can't spell King. King doesn't have a Y in it. That's all the time we have for our ad section because it is now time for our grave-wang
Starting point is 00:15:09 news. This is the news of the most cool grandmother you've ever heard, which is 99-year-old Catarina last name. He's decided to top her grave. Orduna Perrezz. Yes. Or do you know Perez, who's topped her grave with a huge penis and testicles that weigh nearly 600 pounds,
Starting point is 00:15:32 Tiff, you've seen a Wang or two in your time. Can you unpack this story? Well, look, it's a woman who knows what she likes and likes what she knows. Yeah. She's requested it go on top of her grave. She's obviously a big fan of the day. Her family unveiled the completed monument.
Starting point is 00:15:49 That's my favourite bit. That everyone from the family turned up to see this five and a half foot cock and balls, weighing nearly 600 pounds. Wow. I mean, that is, that shows that you've used quality materials as well. It shows craftsmanship.
Starting point is 00:16:01 It's a plaster wang. No, they didn't put a foam, foam dildo on top of their grave. We're not going to disrespect this lady. She was 99. It says, she wanted to break the paradigm of everything Mexican. Is Mexican anti-wang then? I think generally the sort of Catholic, Catholic anti, if we're just generally anti-wang. Right. Anti-wang. So it says, where things are sometimes hidden because I'm not having an open mind, yes, you are correct, Alice. She was always very avant-garde, very forward thinking about things. So she always said in a Mexican sense that we were vergas or vergar.
Starting point is 00:16:39 So it's because there's a Mexican slang word, which means cock, right? Which can either be a compliment or an insult, depending on how you say it. Right. In the same way as somebody showing you their cock can be a compliment or an insult depending on it. In Australia, we've gender-flicted and the sea bomb, or if we're using the bleep out of this episode,
Starting point is 00:16:59 can be a very negative thing, or conversely, the sicker it gets the nicer the person. So you can either be a sick or sick. And the sicker's the full sick who is someone who you really like. Yeah. Yeah that's like that we just make that person prime in a stuff. Yeah well I mean we are in Scotland so you know it's just a greeting. Yes yeah yeah they get insulted if you don't say it here.
Starting point is 00:17:21 Well like in Australia if somebody is outside of pub and they're calling you champ You have a problem. Oh, you're done. Yeah, if you if they're calling you You're at the butt same bucks night. You're having a great time. Oh, so someone comes out and goes yeah, what's happening? Shimp. Yeah, I'm tired. Oh, it's like all you time. I have a five big man. Oh You're in trouble buddy friend any of these terms you're gone Terrible terrible times just because we're in the land down under and everything is upside down What we also have a spunk Which is oh a cock related spunk. Yeah, that's cheers. Yeah, but you say he's a spunk. Yes. Yeah, I mean that's always seen a bit of
Starting point is 00:17:58 There's a very 90s thing the spunk. He's so hot He's effort. Yeah, we we now say he's a little puddle of calm. What a jizzy dude. James, what do you want on your gravestone? As your gravestone? I think it's nice to have her to have like a one just an average sized penis. I think that's actually quite a nice little one you've been there. I'm not sure. I think this is, I found this interesting because Donna Catter, who I believe is a popular musician amongst Gen Zeds, did request this. This is such a strange thing to me. I think the only real winner in this situation is the Goths who are planning to f*** on this thing anyway. I'm not sure. The thing I like about this is I like doing the democracy like wandering around a cemetery
Starting point is 00:18:48 and doing the life and death dates. If this happened, I would assume a big penis has died. This was where they cut off Godzilla's dick. It was buried on this spot. Yeah, this is the memorial to when Kronos had his dick cut off by Zeus, right? Yeah, he's right. And the ocean's and the land came out. This is.
Starting point is 00:19:13 That's exactly the kind of thing. And you know what? I think, as a note on my tombstone, this is the biggest cock we've ever seen. We'll work for my friends and my enemies. That's all the time we have for Giant grave-wang news because now it's time for your reviews. As you know, it we ask our guest editors to bring in something to review out of five stars to if what have you brought in for us today. I'm going to review daydreaming because at school if I didn't like a topic, if I liked
Starting point is 00:19:42 a topic, finish very, very quickly and then distracts everyone else. If I didn't like a topic, I would liked a topic finish very very quickly and then distracted everyone else, if I didn't like a topic I would just gaze out the window and I got accused of daydreaming like, Urgh, why are you doing your dreaming in the day, dream at night like the rest of us? To which I say no, I do not want to dream at night because I get a lot of stuff done in my like when I'm daydreaming I'm you know I'm getting stuff done, I don't want to fight in dragons at night that's when I get my beauty sleep do you see what I'm saying? Yes. Night'm, you know, I'm getting stuffed up. I don't want to fight in dragons at night. That's when I get my beauty sleep. Do you see what I'm saying? Yes.
Starting point is 00:20:08 Night time is for resting. I like to dream during the day, fight dragons, you know, win awards. I actually, actually call it afternoon manifesting. That's what I prefer to use as a term. So daydreaming, I give it five out of five. I've actually been daydreaming for most of this podcast so far, just imagining that we're recording it on a hot beach,
Starting point is 00:20:28 not in a hotel room, or for rainy, wall, mile in Edinburgh. But we're all still here. Yes, that's nice. I'm glad you're in Dreamer, so we're... No, no, no, I haven't dreamt your way. We're just doing it somewhere hot. I'm being given peanut colladas. That's pretty good.
Starting point is 00:20:40 How many out of 5? Oh, 5 out of 5. 5 out of 5. Solid, 5 out of 5 for daydreaming. Excellent. James, what have you brought in for us? I'm bringing contemporary art. I took my daughter around to see who is eight months old, Perthic age for contemporary art. I took her around to the contemporary art museum just so I could say my kid could have done that to everything. I've always
Starting point is 00:21:00 wanted to do that. The contemporary art museum. And it's not that it's bad art. It's that she is a genius. It's amazing. And it's not that it's bad art. It's that she is a genius. It's amazing. It's that it works that she's creating already. My problem, it's this whole place built itself as Monon art, Monon art museum, not Monon art. A lot of the stuff, a couple of years ago,
Starting point is 00:21:17 retrospective, if I'm going to a Monon art museum, I want someone building it as I'm there. I want them to say, as I get to the back of the museum. They should have torn down the first two exhibits and say, not modern enough, art has changed by now. Here's the new hotness coming in. It feels like everything is too dated. I'm saying two stars. Saudi Prince News now, a Saudi prince intends to build a horizontal sky paper that will be 170 kilometers long
Starting point is 00:21:46 and it's called the mirror line so it might also be 170 kilometers long mirror which is going to be in the desert. James Colley, you tell me how this is going to go wrong. Yes, I've done a lot of lines off of mirror so I am an expert in this. So it's horizontal sky spout. So it's a horizontal sky spout, right? So the Mirror line that is going to be built except it's not, it's just a video with kind of PS3 level graphics that claims they're going to build this thing which they won't.
Starting point is 00:22:22 It's basically like Davinci drawing a helicopter and being like, see, the rest is up to you. This has had a trillion dollars allocated to it. Not invested allocated, and someone would say, how do you have that trillion dollars? Is there an industry poisoning the world that you might have gotten a trillion dollars from? Ah, never mind, build your stupid mirror city. So the idea of this is a 3D city that won't exist. You might as well have uploaded a clip from the fifth element and said, yeah, just make that. They did say it will be as iconic as the pyramids.
Starting point is 00:22:59 And I believe it will also have about the same level of human rights observed in its construction. Yeah. And f***. Apparently it had one big problem. The story's put out one problem with this and they specify one problem. I have a few others but they have one which is that birds will hit it. And that might be the only part of having a giant mirage structure in the desert that I agree with because that would be very funny to have birds and find out we have dropped a mirage side. A city the size and shape of a mirror in the middle of a country and just be like oh well this is bullshit. Well yes I have the similar feelings to James, but he's saying it will rival the pyramids and I'm like, dude, you realise that's what people were buried.
Starting point is 00:23:53 Like the pyramids are tombs, but I mean, he might be in it as a tomb by the time it's finished because they're saying it's expected to take 50 years to build. I just think it's just a terrible idea. I mean if you want to be able to look at yourself and see your own shame in the reflection of this stupid thing that you this folly that you've built, what's going to happen is it's going to be half-built and then abandoned. Just built enough to, for everyone, to realize that what a terrible mistake it was that they could have seen it happening a million miles off and they'll just sink a trillion dollars into the desert and will all be sadder for it. Well, he wants to see himself in the mirror. And I'm British, so when we look at ourselves
Starting point is 00:24:32 in the mirror in the morning, we apologize. That's how we do it. See, if it was a fun house mirror, I'd be entirely on board. If you go uptown, you look really quite tall and skinny, but if you go downtown, you look very short and fat indeed. That's all the time we have for Desert Mirror News because now it's time for other Desert Mirror News. This is the news that the Dune Bible Crypto Collective wants to sell its Dune Bible. If any of you remember, this is the story of a DAO or online collective who tried to buy the rights to Dune, but instead bought the June Bible,
Starting point is 00:25:06 which is to say a specific version of June a book, a very beautiful book but not quite the thing that they thought they were going to buy because they thought they could make a movie of it and then they couldn't because it bumped into copyright issues. Now they're trying to get it off their hands. Tiff Stevenson, you've read June. Can you unpack this story? I've watched June. That's almost the same.
Starting point is 00:25:31 The members of this club, yeah, I think we've discussed this on the show. I don't know what the club used to be called, but they're changing their name to Spice Club? Yeah, a members-only group instead of a body within a formal voting structure. No one wants to be a member of the spice club after that picture of Jerry Hallowell with Nadine Dorries. The weekend just gone. That by the way, if you've seen that image, it's bad because I think what's going to happen is Jerry's going to end up on TikTok, do it in with Nadine Dorries and if you watch it, you'll have seven days before you die by the ring. It's very much cursed. It was one of many crypto DAOs, do
Starting point is 00:26:07 we know what that means? At DALS, here, crypto DAOs. DALS. Oh, do you say DALS? Yes. Like the DALJOW. It's a cool, you say DALS. Because it's 10X as cool as saying DAO.
Starting point is 00:26:17 So what it says here is they hope to maintain the physical condition of the book, find a way to scan and distribute his contents publicly, and produce media similar to Jodawarski's never-made adaptation of June. So far, Spice Club managed the first of these tasks, paying for upkeep with Treasury funds. It's also founded a contest to find stories that could be turned into a TV mini series. These projects, as well as the Frank Miller NFTs, were put forward by a small court team, and then passed to a vote of people who had purchased spice tokens. Now it's basically becoming the book. Yes, across between Dune and, you know, Mad Max, Fury Road or something. Yeah, exactly. There's a few people who have all of the money and everyone else is sort of a chump being exploited for their own resources.
Starting point is 00:27:05 this sort of a chump being exploited for their own resources. James, have you bought some spice tokens? Yeah, I relate to these people because I also buy books, spend too much money and then ultimately don't open them and regret the whole process. I can't stress enough. I have a copy of Lamort D'Artha Handy. I like this story because it is the story of June itself. Starts great,
Starting point is 00:27:27 then it turns out there's a lot of lore and real diminishing returns the more you look into it. It's going to take a long time to sort it all out and it just gets into weird philosophy and economic spaces that just aren't very interesting when there could be a giant worm to ride. I mean there is a giant worm to ride and it's on the grave of this nice old lady in Mexico. And this is a short episode this week because we're at the Edinburgh Fringe I'm flipping through the ads at the back. If you've got anything to plug Yes I'm here at the Edinburgh Fringe too. First show tonight
Starting point is 00:28:02 I finished on the 29th the show is called Sexy Brain. You may see a poster of it if you're up here. I've already been sent some picks, but it's my head and legs. Like a flamingo, your favourite animal. Popping out of a gigantic pink brain. And so you should come and see that. That's my main thing I'm plugging all month is Sexy Brain 8 o'clock. And I think there is a streaming. I think we're streaming it on the 23rd. I believe you're streaming yours as well. Yes. So on the 23rd, if you're not able to make it to the fringe and you'd like to watch the live stream, it'll be on the 23rd of August. James, have you got anything to plug? We've just finished up a season of
Starting point is 00:28:38 Groen. If you are in Australia, you can catch it all on ABC Ivy. If you're not in Australia, you are geoglocked and since pirating doesn't exist, you have no idea how to get that for anything from me, jamcoly.com and also Lamort D'Artha by Mallory, a wonderful collection if heavily misspelled. You can find me online at at a liturativealit.it.ibe on Twitter and Instagram or www.patreon.com. Slash Alice Fraser, one stop-shop full of my personal podcasts and blogs as well as my weekly tea with Alice Salons. I'm in Edinburgh doing Kronos every night at 9.15 at the Guild of Balloon. Your roving reporters this week are Josh Gamsey Lockhe, Peter Mack L, James Corskaden, V-Bloak and Cult of MNTR, who all sent in the
Starting point is 00:29:26 robot spiders news. Rod Funk, Anthony West, Bo Jacobs, Jeff Spakowski, who all sent in the Dick and Balls grave news, and Sam Garwood, who sent in the Spice Boys crypto news. That's a lot of people. If you would like to send us in a story that you think is good, at Hello Garglers on Twitter is the place to send us that in. I get them through other mediums if you email them or a Patreon me them or any other form. I might use the story, but I will not remember to write your name down and so you won't get credited as a roving reporter. So tweet us at Hello Garglers if you want your name on this podcast and you have a good story.
Starting point is 00:30:04 This is a bugle podcast and Illustrator production. Your editor is PED Hunter. Your executive producer is Chris Skinner. I'll talk to you again next week. You can listen to other programs from the Bugle, including the Bugle, the Last Post, Tiny Repolutions, and the Gargle, wherever you find your podcasts. and your podcasts.

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