The Cake Eaters - 119. Wet Hot American Summer: Ten Years Later

Episode Date: September 23, 2025

Heath and Brandon return to camp with Wet Hot American Summer: Ten Years Later. The boys talk through the Ontario Moon, how it's finally ok to joke about 9/11, Home Improvement, Tim Allen's checkered past, love triangles, rebounds, Mark's sex book, and Alyssa Milano.Follow us on Instagram @thecakeeaterspodEmail us at [e-mail]

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It's not worth winning if you can't win there! by strange cliffs crash the Ontario moon oh the Ontario moon when morning comes too soon when baby when I speak its name baby oh the Ontario moon fuck I messed up the end there oh the Ontario moon I think it's don't speak its name not when I speak but that That's pretty solid. For a song we only get 20 seconds of, that was pretty solid. Crushed it. Oh, the Ontario moon.

The real, special moment. The real question is, do you think they're singing about Ontario, the Canadian province, or Ontario, the city in Southern California? Absolutely, the Canadian province. What, how much it, providence? Yeah. Yeah, that would make sense because we're in Maine, but seeing about a whole province. Yeah. And Ontario of all provinces?

You don't know shit about Ontario, Brandon. You wouldn't get it. What about like a Saskatchewan moon? That'd be cool. I mean, that does have a much better ring to it. It's my Saskatchewan moon. All right, Brandon, why did we sing this song? Manitoba moon.

Then you got the alliteration. oh there you go that's not bad but tell the people why we're singing this beautiful song um so he just gave us a rendition of ontario moon by the the famous two-piece jam band soul glimmer some real stone cold lyricists there we are continuing our trek through uh wet hot american summer the third and final installment heath ten years later what a journey which was I believe yeah so the original the original movie that we did that was 2001 pre 9-11 what a world we talked about that yeah and then first day at camp I believe was 2015 let's double check that yep 2015 and then 10 years later is 2017 yeah and

set in 1991 have you seen actually speaking of 9-11 have you seen the The TikTok, sorry, that's a weird way to start a sentence, but have you seen the TikTok where... This is going to be in the 9-11 show. Let's do this. Where the guy is like, you know, there's kids out there that were born after 9-11. Like, they can't, they don't, they don't even have the capability to never forget. Yeah. Like, they can't, they don't even have the capability to never forget, Brandon. Like, how are they supposed to never forget when they were never around?

I do, I do, I do love the fact that we've, we've, we've. we have entire generations that don't know what 9-11 was because they didn't experience so now it's now it's fine to joke about 9-11 i'm glad we're fine it's it's finally you know it's it's hit the it's like the lincoln assassination you can joke about it now you know i'm pretty sure i brought this up in the wet hot the the the wet hot american movie episode that we did two episodes ago where there's the there was a um a stand-up bit that I saw the other day and it was like there was a crowdwork or whatever and the dude was like uh oh what are you getting married they're like oh 9-11

it's September 11th and they're like he's like how old are you and they were born after 9-11 he's like okay that makes sense that's and also probably got a great killer deal hill or deal that's that's what you want to do that's where you're you're grabbing one of the most expensive places for half price yeah especially if it's like a weekday you know yeah but anyway so went on american summer they did not need to make you to get to get married on 9-11 that's you know that's do you think that their wedding like tagline was never forget that would be amazing that's it's like it's just i think i think i need to get married on 9-11 now i think that's a this is like happen and and they're both really tall and so

it's just like the couple standing over never forget everybody calls them the twin towers because they're so tall all right let's get to the tv show brandon this probably enough 9-11 talk for you never have enough you never have a morning like oh my god oh man if there's a tall couple out there we just laid out what could be one of the funniest internet moments of our lifetime yeah yeah yeah i yeah i can't i can't i'm not tall enough to do that we need uh you got to be like you got to be at least six five both the year well yeah we need like a we need like a a like college basketball player and marrying a college volleyball player and like you know it's that would be either either gender for either one i don't care yeah doesn't matter what's going on there that's the that's the least of

our worries it's just two tall folks get married twin towers baby twin towers get married on 9-11 never forget or like if david robinson and tim duncan came out you know that would be great Remember when they were the Twin Towers? Were they? I was to say somebody was the nickname the Twin Towers. Was it them? Okay. Okay.

Yeah. All right. Anyways. Damn right. Brandon, look what you did to me. I feel like I'm becoming too susceptible to your shenanigans. First of all, you say that like it's a bad thing. Shenanigans.

I call shenanigans. You know what I have been watching a lot of lately? It's kind of a driving Kelly crazy home improvement. I didn't. Dude. Oh, ha, ha, ha. I fucking love Tim the tool. Dude, I forgot how much I love that show.

And, like, Jill, I think Jill's the best character, like, you know, just, yeah, yeah, it's, she's, like, their chemistry, like, Tim and Jill, their chemistry is out of this world. And then, you know, Al, his character and how it, like, blossoms and develops. And, like, it's season two when he starts, like, dating and it goes terrible. It's just an incredible stuff. It's just, if you're looking for some good, wholesome family content, like throw home improvement on, it's good stuff. What about when Mark goes goth? That was lame. That was the best.

Come on, that was the best. When Mark went goth, that was when I was, that wasn't as, as drama filled as JTT has cancer. Oh, no, no. When that episode, I remember like when that episode came out, it was like, oh my God, we got to watch. Randy cancer how could it be my mom always hated home improvement though so like she would she would bear it was it too too much too much shenanigans yeah oh yeah it was way to like tim drove her nuts you got to follow the rules you got to do things the right way you know he's just at the grow oh oh oh oh you know she didn't like any of it i love it like i will like it's so hard not to like join in when he like gets all worked up and like i'll have it on like i'll watch it

this is insane but i'll watch it on my phone while i'm playing play in playstation and like i'll just be playing and he'll start going off and i'll be like oh yeah that's that's good that malon's uh him allen's a fucking maniac he's a he's a real right wing nut now dude he was just ripping cocaine during home improvement though let's see well he got Tim Allen he got arrested in college for being a drug dealer didn't he yeah yeah he got it's like he was just ripping cocaine during these episodes I know it was but anyways the one thing I do love the world the one and only thing I do love about Tim Allen is he uh he always shouts out Denver I don't know why it's like uh in home in home

improvement he shouts out Denver a couple times in like the he did like two or three shows after that and his character is always from denver or the show is is in denver nice he's uh he always shouts out Denver i don't know why he's not from there nice he's from michigan right oh shit no he was born in denver there you go that's why brandon his uh home improvement was based in detroit though yeah because he went to i think i think he went to the university of michigan i think that's where he got arrested for being a for drug dealing they play the huskers here coming up oh no he went to western michigan university my apologies my apologies oh the mustangs brown coast that's not the mustings don't i thought it was

the must don't don't embarrass yourself he's that's sorry brady cheese all right let's talk about this dumb show because it i think i said it to you off air it wasn't terrible but i also wasn't necessarily good and so there was it much much like much like the rest of the this franchise if you're in on the joke it's hilarious if you're not in on it you're just sitting there going like okay let's let's wrap this up and i was i was out of the joke more often than not in this but there was a couple there's victor saved it again victor and uh neal neal victor and neal also saved it again you know what i realized because we we taught was it last episode of the first episode where we we were figuring out what character we are

yeah we originally we said you were the cook yeah not jean but the other one yeah um watching i don't know if i'm him now no watching this you who you who you who reminded me of you you was jj if you if you especially in the first like three episodes the way his mannerisms the way he talks and like his like inflections and stuff was very similar to you there was one scene i forget what scene it was in like episode two where i was like that that is heath like he that that's exactly what he would say and do like the video it was that was a good one but that it was after it was after that it was when they're at the camp when they're at the camp and it was like the way he said something i was like that's exactly

how he says has says that shit um so yeah you're jj for sure dude all right that's fine i don't think i would get caught in a weird love triangle like that but I guarantee you already have do you think so I think back I bet you've been in a triangle no you're you're a triangle kind of dude no no not at all I if it was that friends friends girlfriends were what is always I'm not saying you as friends girlfriend not for you I'm just saying there was some sort of triangle oh oh well that's I guess I was thinking of two different things I was thinking like a friend you know like that kind of try with a friend with a friend

like because this was these were his buddies right so like elephant in the room mark and claire didn't exist those are two brand new characters yeah they just drop like i the very first episode they just dropped them in to the scenes like they were then the whole time when when it showed when it cut to them in their apartment or whatever i i stopped the show and i was like who the fuck are the i googled it i was like who the fuck are these guys i knew exactly what they were doing i was like they just are acting like these guys have been here the whole time it was unbelievable this like i said this wasn't a terrible show but it also wasn't good victor and neil saved it the whole george hw bush and regan nuclear bombing the camp was the worst

storyline in the history of tv show storylines in my personal opinion it was it was it was it was was rough um oh my god when they undo everything at the end the opening theme is uh jane by our really good friends jefferson starship did you know that yeah we talked we talked we for sure talked about this in the first in the first one yes we for sure we did i don't think we did all right anyways keep going what are you saying why do you think they're our friends if we'd never talked about that before no we've talked about it during a different movie they did something in a different movie or shell was it jefferson starship or jefferson airship i don't know it's one of them because i think i sang the song i sing one of their i think the song you

sing was for wet hot american summer what no but we definitely we definitely talked about the the theme song in the first we talked about um a good chunk of the songs but um but yeah neil and victor carry this for sure um i loved uh neil and sherry neil and sherry again um when they're talking outside of his apartment uh sherry has two sherry has two amazing quotes um during that scene she's like hands in his box and she's like here's your box of stuff here's your like you're now your macbook and your inline skates and she pulls out like four other things and then she goes and just a whole bunch of other stuff from 1991 I did love but she was just pulling like all the most cliche here walk man you're like all the most cliche stuff and then she goes uh because Neil's like what did I do Sherry why don't you what did I do why don't you want to be with me anymore and she's like you didn't do anything Neil and that's the point I need more out of life than eating corn dogs and watching horror flicks on your futon which is like okay sherry what what more in life is there that sounds that sounds pretty fucking dream like especially at like 20 years old you know

26 291 yeah um 20s amazing 1991 that's yeah yeah sherry come on you don't act like you're better than this. Uh, it was, yeah, uh, I mean, the first, I, I, I tried to cheat using chat GPT and it Oh, I did, I did too and it lied. It straight up lied to me. It did a terrible job and I was having such a hard time paying attention during this. It wasn't, like I said, it wasn't terrible. I just, I don't remember any of the details. It was like I blacked out during most of it. We could talk about Connie did a great job. you know she was like a fashion yeah fashion designer and she's ready to that that had me cracking up

she's ready to settle down with coop she has him coop is engaged to jenny and um coop and katy justice for jenny did well coop and katy kiss and then katy decides you know what coop well okay so i was with her on this because they kiss and then great it as with all the other instances in this show all of this takes place in one day okay so she they kiss jenny freaks out breaks up with coop calls off the engagement and then they're at the dance and coop is like um we can be together now forever well he says yeah and he says it so terribly because he essentially says well the jenny thing can't happen anymore so let's why don't we give this a try and it's like oh how how fucking romantic of you coop to you know immediately after you call off your engagement to be like well i

got no other choice so it might as well be katy i was with katy on that where i was like dude i'm not going to be your fucking rebound you fucking loser i mean i think that was cold-hearted she is just chasing coop and then just dumped her she always she wants what she can't have you know but i was with I mean, don't we all? I was with her on that where I was like, you don't, yeah, I don't, you don't want to, like, the immediate rebound. It wasn't, it wasn't even, wasn't even like a half hour later. Yeah. Yeah.

I did love another bit they kept doing throughout the episode is they would just turn around in the middle of a scene and somebody would be standing right there. They call it out, I think, in, in one of the later episodes where, um, uh, Coop and, uh, and the cook guy what's the cook guy's name oh gary is it gary whoop and gary are uh like talking in the in the uh the cabin the the bunks and then they after they're done are you and uh gary turns around andy is just laying there in the bed and he goes oh have you been here the whole time oh i forgot about that ad's storyline was great too with the uh the uh the younger king of camp deegs deegs um so i actually was just looking at the kid from deegs because he's young Sean from psych yes he's young Sean he's uh he's in like everything he was in um he's in a million

thing everybody loves raymond skyler gazondo jzondo i don't know how to say his last name but he's in yeah he was in um uh he was young Sean and psych he was in um what was that uh he was in in the vacation remake with Ed Helms that was a terrible just called vacation he's in one of the night of the museums he's in the newest Superman too I believe the amazing Spider-Man the amazing Spider-Man too with what's his face not the new guy and not the original but the middle one he wasn't those ones yep yep Howard Stacy is his name oh my god he is a legend among legends when it comes to the buddies movies Brandon Air buddies buddy's buddy

snow buddies he does space buddies Santa buddies spooky buddies treasure buddies he does one of my god he does one of the the puppy voices right yeah okay yeah I remember he's he's B dog B dog dude he's also uh do drop in walk hard that oh yeah yeah he's into so anyways he's in book smart too did you ever watch book smart no that's a that's a great movie book smart um great movie it's like a it's like a 2010 updated super bad but the two main characters are our our ladies yeah but that's a great movie book smart highly recommend book smart his king of the camp battle with um andy was unhinged it was and then when andy gets

shamed and they all just turn their backs on him. And they said, Louser. Yeah, they punch him and then they turn their backs up. Loser. When he first meets him and they're doing the softball thing, that, that,

we mentioned how they're always, watch out. Go to a second. Let's take it over. Go to say, but pick this son of a bitch off. That's a great way to pick somebody off is to announce that you're going to pick them off. I thought the same thing.

But that whole softball thing, we mentioned how they're always, you know, paying homage or taking things from other summer camp movies. There's, um, did you ever watch Sleepaway Camp? It's like an 80s. I think I brought it up in the, in the, you know, yeah, because they reference it a lot, you said. That softball scene is, is a reference to Sleepaway Camp as well. I don't know if you've ever seen, it's like a real viral clip of that scene that's on like TikTok and Instagram. it's a scene where it's the best it's the best like trash talk scene i've ever seen in a movie and sleepaway camp because they're playing it's like an older counselor and a younger camper

and they're like trash talking while they're playing softball and the older counselor goes uh i forget the people's names but he's like hey why don't you eat shit and die kid and then the kid snaps back and he goes hey rick why don't you eat shit and live summer's here and you can now get almost anything you need for your summer's here and you can now get almost anything you need for 20 days. Delivered with Uber Eats. What do we mean by almost? Well, you can't get a well-groom lawn delivered, but you can get a chicken parmesan delivered. A cabana? That's a no, but a banana, that's a yes. A nice tan, sorry, nope. But a box fan, happily yes. A day of sunshine, no. A box of fine wines? Yes. Uber Eats can definitely get you that. Get almost, almost anything delivered

with Uber Eats. Order now. Alcohol and select markets. Product availability may vary by Regency app for details. Oh, this is it, the day you finally ask for that big promotion. You're in front of your mirror with your Starbucks coffee. Be confident, assertive, remember eye contact, but also remember to blink. Smile, but not too much, that's weird. What if you aren't any good at your job? What if they dim out you instead?

Okay, don't be silly, you're smart, you're driven, you're going to be late if you keep talking to the mirror. This promotion is yours. Go get them. it's never just coffee it's the great best clapback in the history of clapbacks now you got to live with that shame that you ate shit yeah yeah oh my god yeah but but dwee that's real real psychological deegs not dweeb oh sorry sorry sorry d's is the new deeggs is the new andy he's got a set his uh partner in crime

Seth you know is he wet Seth wearing goggles or what he's got some weird glasses he's got like athletic glasses okay don't don't the Rex backs dude they were kind of reg specs but not you know like they're new they're they're the new like fashion I feel like they're the new fashionable ones for kids that are gonna just like be too reckless to not have their glasses attached to them at all times I I'm getting I have an eye exam later to I'm going to get some new glasses, some new prescription sunglasses, and some new rec specs. Oh, let's go, the athlete.

Oh, yeah, dude. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. But we're getting a scholarship. Got to protect your eyes, kids. Got to protect those eyes. Yeah, you got to protect the paint too. That's true.

A little Kurt Rebus. Yeah, dude. No free layups in here. All right. What haven't we talked about? So let's go, we can just go through some of the characters. And I think that'll help us just talk to that. I have some great quotes to go through to.

Because like, let's start with, we've got Elizabeth Banks. Let's start with her character. She is now a newscaster, but she is doing investigative journalism. And she goes through just chaos to get back to the camp to figure out. that like this it it all goes back to camp firewood type of ronald reagan was willy shits his pants i hated the ronald regan storyline so much and then like the the them showing it and it was just like that circular ball of turd and then like the girl has him look into her eyes and he doesn't shit his pants and he saves the camp that's why he wanted to destroy it because he's willy shi

his pants well but he didn't want to destroy it he did but he didn't because it was all a it was all a joke yeah that's right forgot about that i actually forgot the fact that they undo everything with the joke at the end just it's made it i get what they're going for but it like it ruin because they even they even talk about it um while the confetti's like going off they're like well what was the point of this and what was the point of this thing that's like yeah it's like yeah okay we we get it you're really funny but we all we also should point out so um but adam scott is playing bradley cooper's character of ben um we're gonna get to that yeah it's like yeah but i want to point out so the

there's the reason they do that is because they couldn't get the schedule to work with bradley cooper but they also they couldn't get the the reason why everybody is kind of displaced and there's only like a core people in the camp and there's a bunch of other people out you know doing whatever is because they couldn't get any everybody's schedules lined up so like elizabeth banks all her scenes are shot elsewhere separate all of jeans and chris pines everybody's like on different schedules shooting whenever they can the um the dude from fray the dude from fraser was just on a webcam yeah they think i did you okay so i was gonna ask you about that one um did you because he was all right are we done here like good luck with the rest of your shoot do you think they

just like left his like no sign off on no they did that on purpose because he well he takes the mustache off but then he goes and he grab if you if you if you it keeps the camera on and he goes and he grabs emmy and he starts like caressing his emmy he was doing a bit but yeah so that's why everybody they couldn't get anybody scheduled to his line up so that's why everybody is in different in different spots and locations um and that's why i've been and if you if you remember back to first day at camp bradley cooper is only in like a handful of scenes uh because the same thing happened then they couldn't get his scheduled like they only had him for like a day and that's why he plays uh

they they like in the episode one they're like he's like oh i'm also a dj and here's my dj mask um and then you see that dj and all the other scenes because it's just a mask and it's supposed to be Bradley Cooper. So they did a lot of finagling with people's schedules and trying to actually get a step shot. I laughed so hard when I saw Ben Scott and I was like, oh, I know exactly what they're going to try and do. Or what's his Adam Scott?

I'm sorry. But when he was like, do you think they're going to notice? It's like, what? No. Like you got a nose job to fix your deviated side. them you look the exact same it was a medical condition you look the exact same i love i love what he goes i thought that was the funniest thing that they could have ever done was to have it be just a no like to explain it away with the nose job well i loved how when he when they get he gets

to camp and he goes up to abe polar and he's like hey so and she's like don't know she's like i know she can't even tell she goes did you fix your deviate something that's all that matters that was my favorite part of the whole show it was like that it was great and then okay and then we also like we'll just kind of like trail into the other part of their storyline so michael ian black is back as his stay-at-home husband mckinley but they get a nanny who is in on this like big stupid joke the whole time but like her part of the joke is that she's a psycho murderer and is like messing with the two of them and their couple. And so they end up killing her.

Yeah. And when it all comes out as a joke and they're like yelling her name and then they walk away and they're like, all right, so we're going to chop her up and we'll leave a hand here and a leg there and a foot there. it was like oh my god that was that was a wild part of the show that they had them kill her and then it was a joke yeah they um the whole the whole the whole back and forth with uh with him with her mckinley and then uh claire being like this is just like the movies this is it was great uh and then you know melissa elissa milano we're we're bearing the lead here it's alissa milano who plays Renata, Renata. Yeah, Renata.

Alyssa Milano, one of the all-time babes. From Charmed, right? Charmed. When that was on TNT. Who's the boss? Yeah, who's the boss when she was younger? Oh, dude, who's the boss was great? We watched that a lot in our house.

Hold me close, young Tony Danza. I'm so glad you said that because I sing that all the time. Friends ruined that song for me because that's all I think of now. Oh, if I close now, Tony Danza. Yeah, that's all I want to sing. Yeah, who's the boss is great. But yeah, Alyssa Milano was one of the original bombshells. Yeah, one of one of Brandon's first crushes.

And in specifically in Charmed, I'm glad you mentioned Charmed. Yeah. My mom when I was growing up was a huge charmed. Charmed head, Charmhead. well because it was on i'm gonna coin a coin uh they probably already have a name but i'm gonna call him charm heads dude the the run that charmed had on tn t and team big mike loves some charm like when he was just like doing the dish in like they hand wash their dishes and so he loves throwing some charmed on working around the house when i'm when i'm at my my dad's because he's got

uh he's got the cable so when i'm i might go back to cable i'm getting sick of all these shit i think we i complained about this last time it's fine keep going sorry let's say what because you wait you wake up 6 a.m early and guess guess what's on t and t charmed that it's like uh it's like when you travel you know and and you're in the hotel and it's it's you just end up watching the most random shit that's on but like you know like yeah and it's it's always something like it's like oh dude i haven't seen these episodes of south park or it's like you know like or um a random I can't even think of the hour-long shows but you know what I mean

like it's just like the most random fucking shows ever or like a like a random action movie like if caught air comes on dude over it right but that's yeah like any of the team like a Fast and the Furious as you know like any of the TNT classics so Charmed was is on was on TNT it's it's it's got to be on HBO Max right maybe yeah off to check I might it might be time to rewatch charm dude i think we're gonna so paramount has a deal do you think there's any mighty ducks charmed connections dude i think we're gonna make the unfortunate switch from hbo to paramount because hbo is like 180 dollars a year and paramount

is running a deal for 30 dollars a year i'm gonna need you to rethink that mainly because i have paramount well what if we make a deal you want to make a deal because i'm poaching off your HBO right now you can do you want to mooch off my paramount i have paramount well that's yeah i think you're missing we're we're cutting down on our streaming services brandon we have a child coming yeah you're gonna you're gonna raise that child in a charmless world yes it's gonna have we want paramount plus so it's eureka's castle little bear you know like the classics rug rats dug that's double dare oh whoa okay okay hold on hold on hold on all eight seasons oh wait yeah all eight seasons he's all eight seasons are on peacock wow so okay

you can cancel hbl then we're good okay all eight seasons on peacock my god what a journey okay so that was time to rewatch charmed baby dude i i mean dude that's we just talked about it's me with home improvement it's been great i'm i'm trying to do some some rick and morty in there but those later seasons are starting to lose me a little bit i never i never got on the rick and morty uh train uh d danny was was was into it so i watched some of it but i never got oh dude dude mighty ducks charmed it says they share the same stunt woman oh my god all right what's the genie effer baby let's let's talk about the next storyline all right let's get back to victor and victor and neal because uh victor is a flare bartender still a virgin

And Neil is Victor's co-worker. That scene at the bar was amazing. That was great. When they're like back to back at the bar. It was so good. But then Victor- I do love us at the bar scene when they're like, my favorite thing about their dynamic is whenever they're like doing something and Neil's just like, you're the man, Victor, you're the man.

And how they explain away his inability to be in some of the episodes by him just taking like a nap. And then he just like weight the background covered by blankets. Yeah. He's like, oh, man, nap really got away from me. Yeah. That was incredible. And so Neil is trying to get back with his ex, Sherry. And she's dating that one guy that's in all the other stuff.

Well, our net, right? Yeah, I always think of him as the sex addict from the league. Remember, I was, I was watching the league while I was doing my fantasy football draft. I'm an idiot, not Will or not. What the fuck is his name? He's a guy that's always in stuff. But I was watching the league as like inspiration for my fantasy football draft. I don't know if it worked.

I was really stoked on my first three picks. But then right when I thought I was going to get, um, either Jaden Daniels or Josh Allen, they got snapped right up. Rob Heuble is the name. I don't know why I thought it was Will or not. Rob Heubel. What was Bradford Gillian or whatever the fuck? Yeah, Bradford.

That was, that was amazing. And then Victor is recruited by the, like, oh, who are they? They, because they were, they tried to get, um, from the first day of camp, they tried to get Coop on their stuff. Donna and Yarrow, yeah, Donna and Yarrow. yeah donna and yarrow and so they want to have a baby and they want victor to see their baby they want yeah because they think your yarrow has uh slow swimmers yeah and so when neil is getting victor ready for sex that was a wild clip too

don't don't say hi don't say goodbye don't see that was incredibly funny Don't say hi. Hi. And he's like, stop making that face. Pretend you had a bank, I think is what he says. And then he gets like a serious face. Smile. And he does like a Joker smile.

God. And then when they actually start doing the deed and they all have to, she makes him wear different masks. That was so weird. When he came out of the bathroom and they were just, it was just like cut to them wearing the masks, I was I was legitimately terrified I was like this is this is how I feel during horror movies that was so was terrifying but his reaction after he has sex like he's like that like that was hilarious to you like nobody believes him they're like okay dude grow up like you know cut the bit man yeah like would no it happened oh my god and that and speaking of that then he ends up with um oh why am my blanket on her name now the the makeout girl he ends up with the makeout girl Abby who is now a sex advisor yes she and she she makes him show her his penis well yeah she makes him show her show her his penis uh in the middle of the child the kids did the kids dance but yeah her whole her whole thing is

she's like she's like if you're if you're having sex your your dick should be weathered and in age it looked like it got ran over by a tire I think is what she says in one time it's like an old oven mitt or something like that yeah and she the first time she sees Victor's dick she's like it's like a newborn baby it's so so peek and smooth clearly you're a virgin oh my god she does she does have another when she's talking to um amy polar about the the british dude um and she they're talking about how amy and the british dude are fucking she has a magnificent quote where she's like uh she like stares at aby polar and she's like okay i'm just gonna cut i want to know about his dick i want to start with his dick

right here right now and she goes i want circumference ball weight girth Amy Poehler, we can go to her storyline. She is a Hollywood producer dating a famous movie star, and they are gearing up to like launch there. Actually a famous movie star. Did you know? Yeah, Garth Garth, Gustav. I understand. Well, Garth. Garth McCarthy. That's the character's name. Yeah. But he's played by, and I don't know how to say his name, Jai, Courtney. I don't know if I'll say he says. He's in, um, I don't know who this guy is. Oh, he was. He's in a bunch of stuff. He was in Suicide Squad, the newest terrible Terminator.

He was in the- I haven't watched. Did you ever watch The Divergent, those like Hunger Game rip-off movies? He was in those. He's in, his newest movie is a shark movie called Dangerous Animals. Looks amazing. I haven't seen it yet, but I am a sucker for shark movies, all in. But he's, he's a fantastic actor. um and his the british accent uh love it it's amazing and who is the kid that she ends up like

they end up dating the like the guy that's the play producer now oh that's uh luke is the character name i want to say okay no logan logan logan that's it john early john early who is in uh in the last our last episode i mentioned search party he has to you watch search party yet because you need to watch what it's on hb o watch before you cancel hb o watch search party please i keep forgetting before you cancel it to be a watch search party all right all right i'm pulling up a tab and putting it in there right now so don't for but he um amy and the british guy they have another great quote where uh when um because they do the whole he does the whole i love you thing um you're my muse um you're everything and then he gets a

a movie gig and it's like never mind but peace bitch um but when in the scene when he's like expressing his love to her he uses an amazing line he's like he's like tell her how much he loves her how she's his muse and she he goes i want to work on a project with you called forever i don't think search party is great fucking life i don't think search party is on hbio bringing Your business doesn't move in a straight line. Make sure your team is taking care of through every twist and turn with Canada Life savings, retirement, and benefits plans. Whether you want to grow your team, support your employees at every stage, or build a workplace people want to be a part of. Canada Life has flexible plans for companies of all sizes, so it's easy to find a solution that works for you.

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originally well originally it was a t and t show and then they moved it to hbom max um but hbom max must have you know they dumped it they make terrible just the worst decisions ever HBO max well that's not surprising real uh real cracker barrel situation they got going over jesus don't get us looped into that brandon keep old jesse or whatever his name is what's the cracker barrel guy i just i assumed i didn't know he had a name yeah they have a name yeah yeah okay it's like old jesse or something like that old jessie just i'm old jessie the cracker bear cracker okay

is that inappropriate uh no it was just some white-and-white crime name sorry is that inappropriate again damn this

you're not you're not inappropriate you're just you're just weird um a couple i have a couple other quotes i want to i want to talk about before we get to um excuse me before we get two we do it one dumb to circle back to mckinley and ben they have the bit a bit going through the whole the whole show uh where they keep they keep talking about the the better business bureau and they're like

oh yeah the bb doesn't mess around yeah that's classic that and then um dude i'm I'm not, if you pushed me far enough, like when I had to deal with H&R block fucking up my taxes, I got those taxes for free thanks to you. Better Business Bureau. How don't they mess up your taxes? Dude, I don't even want to get into it. It was the most, the asinine mistake. And the lady literally was like, just submit it incorrect. I was like, you want me to submit my taxes?

It's better than not submitting it. Well, I was like, well, we have a week, so there's, there's no need to just submit them incorrectly. That's true. I had them, like, I made the mistake of having someone double-checked my work. Should have just submitted my own work, you know? And the person that did it messed it up. And I was like, hey, this is showing weird going on. Why it wasn't so hard?

Because it was two different states. And just the lady that, like, that's, that should be the easiest thing in the world. Did the lady put in a wrong number somewhere? And I was like, hey, this jumped up like almost $2,000. I shouldn't be getting almost $2,000 is too much. And they wouldn't fix it. And so it took me almost a week. And then finally on the last day, I got someone to fix it for me.

I was like, thank you. This shouldn't have been this art. Interesting. Yeah. Interesting. Yep, got me real fired up. But anyways, all right. So what are your interesting quotes so we can kind of wrap this up?

talking about nothing and we still have some storyline to talk about i've only got two more because we hit the the uh the i want to start with your dick was the biggest one that was fucking hilarious um when when um chris pine and jason schwartzman are given their backstory about what happened to him and they're talking about how they're like murder robots and everything and he goes chris pine says he goes um all of that murdering was beginning to murder us that was a great fucking line yes and that was really good and then um uh when uh when we get gail and jean when they uh reunite um and jean's trying to get her to come help he says we need you there gail we need you there to help the camp you know the camp like you know the ins

and outs of the back of your hands which was that's a great that's a great uh like normal saying mess up is to just combine a bunch of them great and then there's uh so that those are my quotes but there's two other things uh i want to was one thing i want to mention and there's another thing we need to talk about okay um the one thing i just want to mention uh to circle back to uh victor and uh the the three-way mask situation when he when he pulls up to their cabin did you see what he's carried he has like a little uh bouquet uh of like uh not even a bouquet it's just like a couple of flowers he picked on the way over but then he has a and neal him and neil split it yeah they split the bouquet oh but then he also has like true bros yeah but then he also

in addition to the flowers he also has a six pack of wine cooers that's bartles and james right it was that it was a different you know name but that's what it was yeah yeah okay it was the same packaging they just changed the name so they couldn't you know you know one of those foods yeah but yeah bartle james yeah my grandma used to pound those things when we would go like uh camping and boating and stuff she would just that's that's amazing i thought it was also really funny how immediately after he was done she was like oh my god i'm pregnant yeah she felt a kick yeah i felt a kick that was hilarious um all right who else do we the well i got one thing we need to delve into here okay

What's that? Are you talking about JJ when the guy that he was sticking up for is literally banging a girl behind the hay bales right behind the girl that he's dating? Oh, yeah, yeah. That storyline was so darned. Well, along those lines, though, we need to talk about, we need to talk about Mark's fuckbook. Did you? Because I. when it started doing the voiceover of him like reading what it said in the book and i was like

this is wild um so i paused it to read some of the the stuff did you see what it said no it was um let me see if i can crap i don't even remember hold on that was what episode five let me see if i can pull it up here the fucking his fuckbook was insane there is he was like it was like by day and the one day he had like seven women and at the at the end of it he said it said something like um it's like i got to stop for some fucking reason hold on i'm about to pull it up here did you like how god the worst storyline it's the last i'll say it was the ronald regan george bush and then governor bill clinton that was i hated

bill bill being the dude in the that was weird i have the i got the fuckbook though if you if you we can because we don't even need to talk about ronald and all that well i was going to say that's like jean and gale and h john benjamin can't of vegetables and beth like that's their whole thing the nuclear bomb it was terrible um yeah um all right what's uh So the first the first entrance in his fuckbook, Monday, June 18th, 1991, what a day. Mandy and then he's got like, so it hasn't called his four girls names and then it has like a, you know, a blurb about the girl next to it. So it says Mandy, gulp, didn't miss a drop.

Sandy, right in the eye. Bernice She took it all the way to my nuts Karen This is what I was After Karen it says Had to stop It wasn't smelling too good

Then she turns the page And it's He's got like a weird little A weird little poem he wrote Or not even a poem It's just the line It says how I love the Let me cunt the ways

and then he drew like a lady's body and the arrow was pointing to the vagina but then so the next page is the next page is Connie June 19th 1991 so the next dare what a body on that little minks

and a mouth three exclamation points Da Vinci would blush oh what the then it says what they should call her is no gag reflex hoover all nickname her j edgar and then at the bottom of the page it says boom exclamation point like he gave himself a there's more there's more oh my god see then then so this

is a good one to you so then it's june 22nd 1991 and this is sandra sandra for the whole day and it's got it's got checkboxes right first checkbox anal done second checkbox blow job done third checkbox filled her panties then she wore them to the store checkboxed finger banged in the grocery store checked that it says this is licked he lime pie off her ass check and then uh and then the next one is angry jack dragon check do you know what an angry dragon is i didn't look that up i don't know i don't even want to know i i think i know what that is and i i i yeah and then i don't even want that in my search history and then the last checks box is the best because the last checks the last checks the last check box is pulled out and came in a

briefcase wow and then then we got more so the next day the next day june 12 23rd, 1991, Chandra. So we're going Sandra, now we got Chandra. The first checks box is, fucked her so hard, her nose ring fell out. And then second is, fell asleep while she blew me. Jesus Christ.

And then the third box, you can only see half of it, but it starts with wheelbarrowed her down the hall. That's hilarious. That's it that my god, I can't believe you stop the movie to make note of all these the voiceover he was saying was wild because he was talking about it was he was talking about finger banging in the grocery store and i was like i gotta figure out what the fuck he's talking about here hold out and came in her briefcase that's wild but that's your homework he go look up what an angry dragon is and get back to us no i do not i think

have a feeling what that is i think i can guess i don't i don't think i even want to know i think it's something coming out of the nose would be my guess well we'll see um use your imagination he's that's okay um well then we also have uh the camp tiger claw he came in a briefcase dude i think the only other storyline we haven't touched on is the whole they sell the camp to camp tiger claw but they camp tiger claws secretly working for your boy ronald dragon and somehow we got a dax shepherd sighting i forget why i have that i have that down here i have dax jacks fucking sucks um i also have another note right with so she goes to the house that um clinton tells her to go to um and it's the house that dax is at he like opens the door she walked did you see that door no she

walks up to the door, the door handle is like, it's way higher than it should be, the door handle. And then underneath, underneath the door handle is a lock. And then underneath, like the normal lock is a deadbolt lock. I think somebody put that door on upside down. Because usually it's flipped around. Usually the doorknob is underneath the locks. I got Brandon you're just being so persnickety right now I'm just it threw me off I was like why is the door why is the door knob up so high and why the locks underneath it no one else gave a shit about the doorknob they and you know nobody else probably gave a shit about the fuckbook but you're welcome because I did I don't know if I owe you a thank you for that I

don't know if I owe you you owe me a thousand thank you for I pulled out and came in a briefcase That's amazing. Brandon, at least it's, you know, something to work towards. That's what you should have done, Heath, you know. Came with a briefcase. Wouldn't be worrying about this baby. Oh, God. Damn right, Brandon.

All right. Would you, would you be upset if I nicknamed your kid briefcase? Yes, I would. I would be upset with that. Okay. Good to know. Good to know. yeah it's all right any anything else do you have to say about this

movie i feel like that's all the notes i got i feel like we covered every character to oh we forgot about the beekeeper the beekeeper still there that's the only thing oh yes oh damn yes okay good call out that's i meant to say it like the beekeeper grown up and calling out to mckinley that he showered was really good stuff did you see did you hear when he showered no he's like it's at the end of his little intro he's like the beekeeper still here 10 years later and don't worry mckinley i showered last week oh that's i thought he said last night no he's last week nice okay well better than nothing yeah the beekeeper is still rocker yeah i did like how he was the dj at the dance too

so he's he's at least he's spinning for people to hear him it seems like people are actually listening now yeah yeah he's he's connected to something yeah that's that's seen in the first one where they pan down and he's just talking to nobody was amazing yeah i mean this is just if you really like wet hot american summer this probably would have been funny for you and a lot better than first day i'm yeah it's way better than first day first day was was terrible yeah it was not needed but uh we've talked about it before about how niche of uh of humor this is and i said something similar um at the start of this episode where it's like if if you're in on the joke,

then it's delightful. You're having a great time. But if you're not in on the joke, you're sitting there and you're waiting for this to fucking end. Yeah. So it's it's very, that's why it's like a, it's a cult classic.

It's very hit or miss. You either love it or you hate it. Yeah. Yeah. And like I, like I said, I was out of the joke. I was in on the joke for the first movie.

100% out of the joke. Yeah, loved it. And then these two, like the miniseries afterwards, I was out of the joke more often than I was in on it. So it was, you know, really the only need to, the only one you need to watch is the first one. Because that's a good, hilarious, like, irreverent comedy. The miniseries, they get to try hard with these. Yep. And it was just, yeah, this one was fine.

What did I give the last one for a cakey rating? is a wonderful question that I do not know the answer to give me T minus T minus five seconds for well I do I will say that Connie does Marguerite Moreau Connie does a great job VP of cosmetics magenta is the color of the year crushed her role as Katie did a great job of leaving coop hanging again you know again i was on her side at the end i was like you know what emotions are too raw right now we need to take a beat okay yeah give me a beat my pa two two point three seven is what you gave uh first day it came though all right then i'll give this uh two point three nine oh two point four

right two point four yeah let's do two point four okay okay okay I gave first day at 2.25. I'm going to give you gave it higher. I know. I probably deserve lower than when I gave it. Okay. So you were criticizing. No, I was criticized as you.

Come on, Brady. That should have been way lower. So you gave it higher. No, I should have, I should have gone like two. Yeah. Well, because you, you gave the original movie 3.63. Yeah, because it was good. I gave it a 3.5.

For this one, I'm going to go, because it is better, I'll go to 2.5 for this one. Yikes. 2.5. Generous of you, Brandon, generous. Yeah. Well, you know what? That's what I am generous. Yeah.

Adam Scott being Bradley Cooper from the nose job was worth it. Yes. Adam Scott being really Cooper and the whole babysitter the babysitter plot line Victor and Neil and then Marguerite Connie is Katie those are your four um your four takeaways those are the shining stars everything else is kind of man you know there's a couple there's a couple quotes like I like we mentioned that are that are pretty good here and there but um yeah Victor and Neil just yeah the best bros dude we need we need to find a friend like like fucking neal neal's a

neal's a diehard dude everything you got everything he got this is great like I'm saying when he when him and victor are like doing anything and he's just like pumping him up is amazing yeah he's the best victor you're the bad it's him coaching him how to sex was pretty wild yeah although he like like throws down the mattress and he's like this is the lady and uh victor's like where where's her head he's like heads up here here's just like a normal lady just a normal lady uh anyways all right well anything else to say about this uh show brandon it was probably two episodes too long probably could have been six episodes I think we said the same thing for a first day of kid where you if you cut this down into a 90 minute movie like we did with the first one it's not bad infinitely better yeah it just it drags on too long because like I was telling you before we said recording I got to like episode five and I was like okay let's let's wrap this up you know yeah exactly started multitasking but that's our that was our trip to camp firewood heath we did we tackled wet hot American summer got it all all wrapped up yeah I don't

what a journey don't sound too excited well it wasn't very good to end it Brandon but the original movie's good good Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh.