The Cake Eaters - 13. D1: The Mighty Ducks - Part 1
Episode Date: August 31, 2021Heath & Brandon finally dive into the original Mighty Ducks movie! Today’s episode goes over minutes 0-19. They discuss the 1973 Minnesota Pee-Wee Hockey State Championship, the long-lasting psy...chological trauma caused by Coach Reilly, how broken our judicial system is, the original poop dollar, and podcast favorite MC Gainey. Follow us at www.thecakeaterspod.com and on Twitter (@thecakeeaters) and Instagram (@thecakeeaterspod) Email us at thecakeeaterspod@gmail.com
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It's not worth winning if you can't win!
Hello everybody, welcome back to the Cake Eaters podcast.
My name is Brandon, I've got my co-host Heath with me.
And today is the day everybody's been waiting for. We are starting our journey into the original Mighty Ducks movie.
And so how we're kind of going to break it down, because it's a long movie and we have so much to talk about, is we're going to break into a couple of different parts. We're going to break it into five parts.
And so that'll roughly be about 20 minutes per part.
But there,
we cut it up to be kind of go with scene ends instead of like actual minute
markers.
So I'll give you guys the,
the,
the full breakdown right here.
So part one,
which is today's episode,
we're going to be going through the start of the movie through the 19th
minute.
And then part two is going to be the 19th minute until about the 42nd
minute.
Part three is going to be minute 42 to minute 60.
And then part four is going to be minute 60 to minute 81.
And then the fifth and final part will be the 81st minute until the end of the movie.
So then you guys can follow along with us frame by frame now that you have those minute markers down.
And so, yeah, five parts going through the original Mighty Ducks movie. And then after that, we'll do a couple special episodes
where we kind of deep dive into specific scenarios
and situations that happened in this original movie.
You know, I'm pumped.
It's what we've all been waiting for, Heath.
Electricity is in the air, Brandon.
It's like, you know, the way I like to think
about our podcast vibe right now is like
98 bulls jazz jordan's final game he's shooting it over byron russell he's giving us his final
farewell that is the energy that we have here right now and the cake eaters podcast because
we got the mighty ducks on the docket Brandon I mean
how are you feeling I feel fantastic I don't know if I feel exactly like that like like the farewell
shot here I feel like the the way you set that up I feel like we're it's like we're getting ready to
end the podcast which is not the case oh no I I didn't I didn't mean to set us up to under deliver
I was just talking about the excitement that electricity
i'm talking marv albert you know you know what this excitement reminds me of heath tax there oh
that is what i'm talking about because it's just terry knows it's that extra special
feeling of uncomfortable no i'm kidding but you know here we are brandon we are
kicking off it is the mighty ducks are you ready to dig into this man i'm i'm ready i'm ready for
the the first 19 minutes of the mighty ducks because there's a there is 19 minutes does not
sound like a lot but there is a lot to unpack there's a lot to unpack within the first three minutes within the first like opening credits of of this movie there's so much going on it's just
ridiculous to let the listeners know out there it took me almost two hours to watch the first 20
minutes of this movie there was so much happening and i had to catch it all man i was i was ash
ketchum from pokemon you know what i mean like i've got to catch them all, man. I was Ash Ketchum from Pokemon.
You know what I mean?
Like, I've got to catch them all, man.
Yeah, it took me a long time too.
I was, first of all, had the subtitles turned on.
Didn't want to miss anything.
And then I was pausing and rewinding the whole entire time.
Yeah, oh, the feature on, I have a Roku TV. So it has the little back 30 seconds button.
I've just been,
I've been living on that in the pause button while I'm jotting down notes.
But anyways, you know, we don't want,
we don't want to get the listeners too much on how the sausage is made.
But anyways,
let's jump in Brandon because we've got opening credits and nostalgia is just
emanating from my pores.
Like, I'm not kidding. I was flashing back.
The music alone, the music, like the music, the credits, as they come up,
the, even like the font and the styling of it kind of took me back.
Like I was, I was on first street in Wayne, Nebraska with, you know,
early nineties. We still had like the late eighties,
like shag carpet, Brown couches. I may have been in a bean bag, definitely had popcorn with M&Ms
in it. If you guys are looking for a movie snack, you better be sprinkling some M&Ms on your
popcorn if you're doing it right. So anyways, we got opening credits. Um, I'm so glad you watched it with subtitles on because the announcer for this peewee game,
this guy is the real deal.
That's a hell of a call.
Yeah.
And I'm assuming he's a radio announcer, right?
I'm assuming he's a radio announcer.
He sounded 100% 90s radio guy.
That was the total voiceover.
Well, he's 73.
That's what I meant yeah the movie is what i say it's what i mean brandon the the movie the movie released in in 90 it was a 91 or 92
was probably 91 uh no 1992 1992 so in that in that aspect 90s radio. The flashback that we have going on
for this opening credits is of
1973. The 1973
Minnesota State
Pee Wee Championship.
It's Duluth
versus Edina.
The Edina Hawks.
We have the Edina Hawks.
I don't know if they actually ever mentioned that
it's the Edina Hawks um i don't know if they actually ever mentioned that it's the adina
hawks in this movie but in game changers season one they call them the adina hawks
yes so we can confirm can confirm so the they're the adina hawks and they're playing duluth
duluth east duluth east okay that's a good clarifier duluth east yes and it is it is statewide uh state Minnesota statewide peewee championships
yeah and he's I mean we've got a great call because we've got Bombay with the steel Gordon
Gordon Bombay Gordon Bombay rocking like he's like 10 I think maybe he looks really small
but he's he's you know he's playing he's the star of the Hawks. He steals the puck.
I think they're like 10 or 11, 10 or 11, something like that.
10 or 11.
He steals the puck.
He's on a breakaway.
He's going.
He's getting chased down, and then, boom, he is hooked from behind.
Whistle blows.
We get the call.
It's a penalty.
Little Gordon.
Bombay.
Gordy.
Big Gordy.
We're number nine, like Gordy.
How his namesake.
What a great, what a great shout out to that.
I actually met Gordy how,
when I was working for a minor league hockey team,
he used to play for the Houston arrows hockey team.
I worked for.
So anyways,
I think he little aside.
I believe that's,
that's when he played for the Houston arrows of the WHA.
I believe that was the same time that he was playing with both of his
sons. They were also on the Houston arrows. Is that right?
I believe so. Obviously I was not working for, for the arrows then.
When I was working for the arrows in the two thousands,
Gordie Howe was very retired and very good.
Yes. But yeah, he's he, Gordie Howe was amazing. One of good. Yes. Gordie Howe was amazing.
One of the best players of all time.
And he played...
Forever.
Yeah, I forget what age he was when he was retired,
but it was close to, if not past 50,
when he retired.
Yeah.
And yeah, he was able to play with both of his sons
on the same team.
Like good old Ken Griffey Jr. and Ken Griffey Sr.
Love to see it it's a
beautiful moment yeah it's i mean brandon's uh family corner highly encourages imagine how good
of a parent gordy how was actually i don't know if i want to say that i i you know i don't i don't
i don't know anything about gordy howard's parenting styles i don't want to say that
and then like look or you know i'll just have someone google it and yeah yeah some crazy shit going on you know how it is nowadays you
always anytime anytime you're about to praise somebody you got to google you know their name
and then bad stuff just to make sure nothing nothing happened gotta double check yeah anyways
let's jump back into the game because we get some, some prime coach Riley showing that he is kind of a sociopathic coach.
We jump over,
give us the worst pep talk known to man for a 10 year old kid.
This is absurd pep talk,
dude.
And so he gives this worst pep talk and I don't understand.
So the,
the way they,
the way they set it up.
So it's,
it's overtime
Tie game, right?
I have this in my notes
It didn't make any fucking sense
Yeah, so it's overtime
It's a tie game
Bombay steals the fuck, gets tripped
Gets a penalty shot
So it's tied
Spoiler alert, he misses the penalty shot
It should go into double overtime or another overtime.
Or penalty shots, shouldn't it?
Why do they lose?
They lose in overtime.
I just don't think they show that.
They just don't show it.
Yeah, which doesn't make any sense.
But so they treat Bombay missing the penalty shot as if he lost the game,
even though it's still tied.
Yes.
Okay.
See, I wrote that down.
I literally put my
notes that like wait a second we gotta pause here for a second the game continuity doesn't make any
fucking sense like why is this poor kid owning all this but hold on before we get there we have
coach riley's shittiest pep talk ever the shittiest pep talk ever and The shittiest pep talk ever. Do you hear what he says?
He says something that I don't know what it means.
He's like, what does it mean
where he's like, I don't
want to see any goats around here
after the game.
Well, so before
before
goat
was kind of repackaged
into greatest of all time okay in sports situations it used to be used
as like a slur like if you messed up you were the goat of the game like that's right it's like a
scapegoat essentially like you're the reason they lost you're you're the goat yeah yeah um it's good
for goats to get repackaged right yeah now now when you say that it's like people think greatest of all time you know wow i would have ever thought that goats would be the biggest winner of the
modern day they used to be negative now they're positive shout out goats yeah we should we gotta
tell our our good friends the uh the alpacas there you know we gotta we gotta get alpacas uh branded
into something we gotta we gotta figure out who the the pr team behind the goats is you know we
gotta get them on the phone.
Exactly. Do you think
it's just because they spit that people
have beef with alpacas? They just don't
appreciate getting spit on?
Alpacas are the nicer ones. The llamas are the ones
that are fucking spitting on you.
That's why alpacas get bad names.
Fucking llamas.
Everybody loves the llama because
of their name. The name rhymes with shit. It's fun to say say alpacas is a bit of a mouthful that's why we
need the pr team we got to read we got to rebrand all right anyways let's get back to riley so that's
that's that's the goat but that's the goat that makes sense he's essentially saying i don't fuck
this up for me and then he doubles down and he goes if you miss it i'm afraid if he if he says
if you miss the shot but he goes to bombay and he goes, you're not just going to let me down.
You're going to let your whole team down too.
Yeah.
And I put a capital WTF after that quote in my notes because what?
And then he also says, yeah, I'm sorry your dad couldn't be here.
Like, hey, don't forget your
dad died well yeah so that's what that's what the fuck dude that's a little bit later on i forget
when that is but yeah they yeah because they they like later on in the movie they flash back to the
scene um i think it's right right before the hawks right before they play the hawks it like flashes
back to this and yeah that's when he doubles down and he's he's essentially like i know your dad just died that sucks it would have been would have been a real
tight if he was here to see you you know yeah and you know we're we're hawks apologists but man
that's rough stuff that's that's pretty rough like you know the announcer is like on his little
shoulders you know how you don't motivate a kid is to bring up that their parent just died yeah
like the kid's going through some shit it's a high pressure situation i think later later on in the
in the movie when when bombay is talking to hans he mentions that that that was the worst year of
his life because he missed the penalty shot and his dad died so him is his dad dying is fresh that shit is fresh it's and for coach riley to bring that up right before the
penalty shot what a like what a move dude what a move it is absurd you know what i also had in here
that i thought was interesting that i i was curious if it's still happening, how in this first part, the opening credits are breaking up all of this action.
So we're getting these scenes cut through with opening credits.
I don't remember. Do movies still have opening credits?
Like, am I just am I crazy? I just don't remember.
I can't like think of modern movies with opening credits, but maybe I'm just maybe i'm just like a fucking idiot i don't
know it's not as big as it used to be anymore opening credits because a lot of disney movies
old westerns old westerns have long opening credits yeah it's and like nowadays ever since
um like the mid-2000s the the whole the huge like even in like tv shows movies all that kind of
stuff the the huge um trend i guess is the cold open where you use where you start with you start
with action right away and then there's like a brief like title scene that's that's you that's
usually what things movies and tv shows do now um because they want to grab your attention right away where it's just like boom
we got something going on and then here's the movie
instead of the elongated
opening credits which I don't know
I don't mind it
this one wasn't bad
when they just take forever if it's just music
and opening credits
like the old westerns you mentioned they're usually
just like shots of the main character
riding on a horse.
And then it's just credit, credit, credit.
That's a little boring.
This, you had the, you had, yeah, you had intermixed.
You had the radio guys call, even while the game wasn't showing and it was just the credits, you still had the radio announcer call going.
So there was some action.
And it drew you in.
And I like that.
And so after the pep talk, I love it too.
You get the classic coach
riley all right like like i feel like that's one of those things where like you could just see
a picture of coach riley in hawks gear and you could hear him saying all right and like popping
his collar you know oh i love the fucking i have the whole'll, we'll get into coach Riley on the bench because he is a piece
of work on that bench, man. Um, I absolutely love it. And so it's, it's rocking and rolling
and here it comes. We've got little Gordy. He's jumping in there. We got the one,
we got the two, we got the three. And what do we brandon triple deke baby oh fuck yeah oh it felt
good yeah it's great seeing it yeah classic move and it's you know to see it from the the master
to the master of the triple deke bombay like what charlie does it it's cool but you know it's to see
bombay do it is you know and even though we missed it just a little bit right, he's still the master.
I think he missed it left.
Did he miss it left?
Yeah, missed it left.
Either way.
The goalie's right.
Bombay's left.
There we go.
And hits off the post.
He drops down.
This is actually in my notes.
This is the most depressing shot I've ever seen in my entire life,
where he's on his knees, little 9-yearold ten-year-old gordon monbe on his knees with just with the fucking spotlight
on him and he's just like sitting there sad this is this is where i wrote my notes though where i
was like wait a second i'm confused like that that was his chance to win the game it should be
it should be tied it's still tied it's's still tied. It's still tied. Like it's,
but anyways, somehow they won off of this miss. I don't know.
And, and on top of that,
did you see coach Riley like look down and disgust? He like, Oh yeah.
He just couldn't even look at little Gordon.
Couldn't handle it.
Man. Either anyways, that's the, that's our opening scene yeah that's how that's
how we kick it off there i mean the emotions are running so high right now because of that
opening scene that's a great job yeah oh it's fantastic that's a great way to bring it underscored
by the music was you knowbumps all around For sure and now
So post
Opening credits you got anything else for the opening
Credits
No I think that was it
It's just beautiful
It was such a great way to start
It like sets the tone perfectly
For his behavior
In this next scene
Because next up
it's courtroom time.
We have Bombay.
So the
opening game scene
1973 PBC Championships.
Now we cut to present day, which is 1992.
So we get adult
Gordon Bombay.
Lawyer style.
Lawyer.
He's ready. He's up there.
He is up there. He is grilling
an old lady. Did you see that?
This is an old lady.
I did not notice that until this
recent watch. I never noticed it before.
And then it pans. So he's
grilling the old lady and then
the other lawyer objects
and he goes back to the bench. And while he's walking
back to the bench, it cuts to the rest of the courtroom and everybody that is on the the uh plaintiff's side um because
bombay's he's defending uh he's the defendant lawyer so everybody on the plaintiff's side
is just it's just row after row of old people it's like a retirement home i'm yeah i'm assuming
this the guy that bombay is defending like just fucked over a bunch of old people yeah i'm assuming he ripped him off
like like some kind of ponzi scheme yeah exactly that's it that's it like any adult watching this
movie it's like oh yeah that guy sucks he just he swindled a whole bunch of old people out of
their retirement yeah i never noticed that before though before no it's a great there's so many like super super subtle adult
like nods and winks in this movie i was really surprised going back like your boy mc gaming
oh dude grand funk railroad did he oh okay we'll get there don't even get me started. I'm going to funk you up just a little bit here.
So before we get too carried away.
So he is, yeah, so he's grilling this old lady.
He says something about like his defendant was only trying to protect everybody from her greed.
Yes, yes.
The old lady's greed.
He put my client put his neck on the line for
your greed yeah and so that's when the other lawyer objects and then the the judge calls him
to the bench but bombay is like bombay is like i'm gonna stall so he goes over to his his client
and he's like what's he say he's like i'm just i don't really have anything to say to you i'm just
over here to keep him waiting yeah he hates it. Something like that. Yeah, he's like,
drives him crazy.
That's what it is. Drives him crazy. And he's like,
please go be
my lawyer.
Okay.
So he goes
up to
the
bench.
The stand. That's bench. The stand.
The stand.
Goes up to the stand.
That's right.
Thank you.
He goes up to the stand with the other lawyer, and they're talking to the judge.
Wait, hold on.
Do you remember what he says to the lawyer?
Because it's a great lawyer burn.
Oh, he says it's the same tie you wore yesterday?
Yeah, nice tie, Frank.
You wore that yesterday, didn't you?
Oh, lawyer burn.
There's a couple scenes later on with that same lawyer wearing the same tie. He wore the same tie again. I didn't you there's a couple there's a couple scenes later on with that same lawyer
wearing the same tie he wore the same tie again i didn't notice that but so yeah he does that to
the he burns the the other lawyer with the tie joke and then he starts talking to the judge
because the judge is like you need to like we need relevant cross-examination yeah and then
bombay spouts now so i'm not'm not a lawyer. I put bird law.
Excellent bird law.
What Bombay says to the judge sounds like fucking gobbledygook nonsense.
So what he says is I haven't written down because I was like, what the fuck is he talking about?
He just put bird law again.
So the judge is like, you can't.
We need relevant cross-examination.
You can't just ask him whatever you want or whatever.
And Bombay goes, he's the exact line.
He goes, we all know the applicability of societal intent vis-a-vis individual action is well established.
What?
What does that mean?
The applicability of societal intent vis-a-vis individual action is well established.
Now, I'm not a lawyer.
Maybe this actually makes sense, and I'm just an idiot, but this confused the fuck out of me.
It sounds like they just threw a bunch of lawyer words in there and were like, that's fine. That'll be good.
That's why I went
straight to It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia,
Charlie Day,
Bird Law.
So then he brings it around.
He goes...
Just rubbed his face in it. Just bald as brass.
After he says the fucking gobbledygook nonsense
he goes now i'm citing higgins v or minnesota v higgins which is a case that the got overturned
they overruled the judge in appellate court i think is what he says yeah and then he goes if
i remember correctly that was your case right to the to the judge and so then the judge gets all
scared because he doesn't want to be overturned again and he's like and then he lets bombay do whatever the fuck he wants just bold as brass
like rubbing his nose in it yeah well so so then it's so then it cuts to them the the two bombay
and the other lawyer leaving the courtroom and you can see the so they're walking down the stairs
yelling at each other and in the background you can see a couple of the old ladies like glare.
Yes.
He's like, you really stooped to an all time low with this one, Bombay.
Yeah.
He's like, I'm insulted, Frank.
You have no idea how low I can stoop.
Yes.
And then that W baby.
My favorite.
Yeah.
He's like, you got to go for the W. And then my favorite thing is.
So the other lawyers that complain and he's like, I don't mind losing the W. And then my favorite thing is, so the other lawyers like complain.
And he's like, I don't mind losing.
I would just like to lose fairly.
And then he starts going to Bombay.
And he's like, that guy, he's like, I think he says like, what about justice?
That guy should be in jail.
And Bombay yells at him.
He yells at him and he goes, and it's your job to put him there.
Don't get, yeah, don't get mad at me, which I did my job.
Like, you know, you know what I put?
I was like, Bombay was correct in his assessment, but it is an indictment on the American justice system that that's what it's up to.
You know, like, that's what it depends on.
Like, if if your lawyer sucks sucks you will see no justice if the
other person can find some loophole and i love like they set bombay up as like the lawyer
so well because then he ends and he's like next time do your job frankie boy
i love him calling him frankie boy what a great oh just totally talking down to him and so that that kind of ends the courtroom scene
there but oh my word oh so then it goes to so bombay's back at his law office he's walking in
office ducksworth savor and gross i think is the the full i think okay duckworks yeah but yeah
ducksworth and so he's walking in with the the secretary and he's all he's like undefeated again uh and then
the secretary brings up the fact that he lost one case and he goes yeah yeah but we don't count that
and she goes and why don't we count that bombay and he goes because i scored with the court reporter
hell yes so i have a question for you brand, because we have gone in depth on this podcast about Bombay, the player that we know he is.
And this was a mom was was the court reporter a mom?
Because this is a little bit younger. Did he start his affinity for the moms?
I don't think the mom affinity started until Charlie's mom. I think that's what kicked it off.
You think that's what kicked it off?
Okay, that makes sense. But we don't know.
We don't ever get any confirmation if the court
reporter is a mom or not. We don't know.
But, you know, hey, that's
not a bad
win. There's that, and then
there is
another scene later on in the movie
where Coach Riley is talking to Bombay and Bombay is like, oh yeah, I'm coaching district five now.
And Riley goes, he goes, oh, do you got a, you got a kid on the team or something?
Yeah.
There's so, there's so many like little between the court reporter scoring with the court reporter or Riley's line.
There's a couple like, like digs at bombay
being a player yeah that i i same with the old lady thing i didn't notice until this last watch
around you know yeah these watching this back as an adult and really breaking it down is opening
my eyes up to a lot of really great subtle humor oh the other thing the the other thing
oh shoot the other so the
other thing so they're he's talking to the secretary and he's like we don't count that
one because i scored with the court reporter and then i believe his next line is uh she had an
intelligent body i think is what he says about the court no that's what the that's what genie
says she's like is that the one that you said had an intelligent body that's right okay yes yeah genie's great i love genie she's
sharp as a tack you know yeah she gives bombay the business and he does he deserves yes yes
shout out genie yeah genie just kills it i like jane too the jane's great the fresh out of law
school did you like where he turns and asks her no calls on the duck phone?
Yeah.
I saw him in there.
He was in the back room.
And then they also set up his hate for hockey because Jeannie's like,
so-and-so dropped off some seats for the North Stars game.
And I always forget that they moved the North Stars from Minnesota down to Dallas.
And then didn't Dallas win a championship after they moved the north stars from minnesota down to dallas and and then didn't dallas win a championship after they moved down there a couple years yeah a couple of years after
they moved yeah yeah with mike madonna brett hall uh eddie belfort i believe was the goalie
so they moved 1993 i think so like the North Stars moved legitimately right after this movie,
like a year after this movie.
Oh, okay.
They moved to Dallas and then they won the Stanley Cup in like 98, 99,
something like that.
This is a little bit further after.
I used to actually work in the Stars arena in like the practice arena,
like up north in Frisco it's north of
dallas and frisco and people would learn the times i think that's where they're that's where
their their minor league affiliate is now is up in frisco yeah it's the tornadoes and then the
mavericks uh minor league team that's who i was working for they're not they're not the tornadoes
anymore oh they're not but the legends play there too texas stars i believe is their name oh nice well either way
people would line up on the way in and out of the arena and um it was just really awkward to walk
through these people when i was trying to work and like trying to go get a beer and a shot at lunch
like we were calling we were doing cold call sales out of a phone book you know like it was
it was rough it was rough biz you know we were just getting kickstarted and like, you know, just.
God forbid those people just wait outside my place of work.
Yeah, dude, get the fuck out of my way, man.
Like, I don't want to see you and your fat kids.
I'm kidding.
That wasn't very nice.
But it was really awkward and uncomfortable.
Yeah.
Anyways.
So, yeah.
He's got hockey blows raspberry.
That's why I always love
Subtitles for little things like that
I always forget when you're like
You know when you do that it's called a raspberry
Like that's
I don't know
I always thought raspberry was when you did it
On like someone's
Like stomach like you blow a raspberry
That's what I thought but they said blow a raspberry
So maybe it's just when you make that noise.
Okay. Good to know.
Shout out subtitles.
So that's when Jane comes in and Jane's got stacks of files for,
for another case.
Yeah.
Jeannie's giving him the business.
Yep.
About 30 and one.
Yeah. Yeah. He tells Jane I'm reveling in my 30 and O record.
And Jeannie's like not not 30-1, sir.
Even though you fucked that court reporter, you know, still counts, sir.
Still counts.
Still counts.
A loss is a loss.
And he's kind of mean.
He's like Jeannie type don't speak.
Yeah, real rough.
Well, he's mean to Jeannie.
I think that was like, because she gives Jeannie. I think that was...
She gives it back. I think that was more of the fun.
But he's a fucking dick to Jane.
Yeah, he's not about Jane.
That comes back around.
But he gets the
call from Duckworth.
And I love what he does here. He's like,
nice, thank you very much, Mr. Duckworth.
Quack, quack, quack, quack, quack.
Because that comes back later in the movie
yeah like when he starts quacking yeah that's where the quack quack quack things yeah that's
that's absolutely oh man i just i got so fired up when he did that it's it's a great it's a great
moment he does it like in this scene and then delivers when he does it to he does it to mr
ducksworth later on in the movie he does it like such such does it to Mr. Duxworth later on in the movie, he does it like such,
such a like condescending fucking like smarky,
like asshole way.
I love it.
Yeah.
Quack,
quack,
quack,
quack,
quack,
Mr.
Duxworth.
Yeah.
And like such a shitty way.
And then,
and then like,
he goes in there and Mr.
Duxworth is like,
he's like,
Oh yeah,
the wind,
whatever.
He's like,
Hey,
Bombay score.
Don't spike.
Like,
you know, like. He's like, hey, Bombay, score. Don't spike. Like, you know, like, very
subtly scolding
him for being so arrogant
about the way he operates in the
courtroom. And he's just, like, not
picking up on it at all.
Like, Bombay is not picking
up what he's putting down.
Then it's a hard cut after he
lays into him. Hard cut to
Bombay's car, which i was trying to
figure out i was trying to figure out what kind of car it was and i couldn't um it looked like
some maybe like a miata or something like yeah that's like real like real budget sports car
you know something really not made for the streets of minnesota in the snow i have that in my like no like number one you're driving drunk but number two
that car in the snow and those are snow-packed streets like yeah that's not something that
you're driving that fucking car fast in like no wonder you're swerving everywhere got you know
like spoiler alert got reckless in danger you know what i mean like dude that is like we are both from
winter weather states like we like as
soon as we see stuff like that it's like oh dude you're gonna kill everyone you're gonna get stuck
and that fucking bastard is gonna like just clang up the interstate we've seen it before
yeah i i luckily now and towards the end of my tenure i mean now it doesn't make that much
difference it doesn't snow in atlanta but towards the end of my tenure in denver i had uh an all-wheel drive suv but before that
uh for the longest time i had like little like two-wheel drive sedans oh boy shit was rough
i yeah i would yeah i would there was one time i was like driving i one time i used to work at
dick sporting goods shout out dick sporting goods um one of the worst places I've ever worked
just shout out garbage they're gonna love that yeah yeah hey sponsor us um but I remember because
it was like a real uh popular mall uh just outside of uh Broomfield Colorado uh so like just south
of Boulder.
And I was driving there.
I had to drive on the highway to get to work for my place.
And I worked in the, like, I worked the winter months because they were, you know, hiring staff for the Christmas rush or whatever.
Yeah.
And I was driving and I had my 2005 Buick Century driving two-wheel, I think it was front-wheel drive, which is like the worst thing you could ever have in the fucking snow.
And I was driving on the highway and legitimately – and I was not drunk like Bombay.
I would never drink and drive.
But like spun out, like spun out like spun out like a
complete like what's what's 360 times two cookie oh i don't know wait uh 720 complete like 720
and came like inches inches away from smacking the median thank god it was like because because
it was christmas rush so i was going in for like an early morning shift it was real early in the
morning nobody was on the road thank god it was just me just like a fucking
complete like 720 spin just miss miss the median you can't you can't mess around with those fucking
those those sedans those fucking bullshit budget sports cars that bombay's driving in the snow
dude it's and especially when you when you factor in the the booze on top of it. And not only is he drinking and driving, he's like the asshole who's drinking like legitimately while he's driving and just throwing the open container bottle in the backseat.
What the fuck, Bombay?
Like what a psycho.
Also, did you see his license plate?
Just when?
Just when license plate?
I was just asking for trouble, man. That was the great hard cut because you had Duxworth being like, don't be an asshole when you win.
Like win with grace and then hard cut to his license plate.
Just win.
And tires just screeching, just driving like a lunatic in the snow.
He's swerving all over the place.
And so all of a sudden we see it.
We hear it.
Yes. Yep. he's swerving all over the place and so all of a sudden we see it we hear it yes yep yep that noise that makes your stomach fall through the bottom of your intestines but bombay keeps driving he
doesn't stop he keeps driving to the point where the cop has to pull up alongside of him and yell
at him pull over pull over and then i i love this part is that the cop he rolls down
the window for the cop and the music is blaring just as loud as it was when he was just driving
all over the place and he's like i guess it was a whittle noisy yeah so good so good it's great and so the cop knows like instantly because
he's swerving all over the place it has to smell like oh yeah you're everywhere he has multiple
open beer bottles in his yeah in his car he was swerving his license plate says just win
yeah you're coming up there's no way this guy's not an alcoholic. There's no way this guy's not an alcoholic.
And did you like what the cop
said too? He's like, I'm taking you down to the
precinct. Do you want breath,
blood, or urine, and then Bombay?
No thanks. I'm full.
I just put,
oh, the balls.
Classic Bombay.
In Game Changers, he does it a lot
where he makes a
stupid deck and then he laughs at himself that's what he exactly what he does here he goes no
thanks i'm full and then just starts laughing to himself like not the time for that kind of joke
for sure and and so i love that right after that happens when the cop tells him to get out of the
car we cut scene to the courtroom. Yeah, his court
date, which is like, that's a real quick court date
for a DUI, right? I don't think you usually do it right
after.
I think that they
must have held a special prosecutor's
hearing or something.
It's the same judge and the same lawyer
as this one.
What are the fucking chances?
The judge said I got called in to are the fucking chances you know well the judge said the judge
said i got called in and i had to think i almost stayed home this morning yeah yeah because now
now they're now after bombay was a fucking dick to both of them during the first year and now
they're loving it they're like here you know karma karma rearing his hair relishing where where
frank's wearing the same tie though same tie he's wearing the same tie
the judge looks like a kid on christmas yeah that he has that joy in his eyes and that smile that
is from ear to ear you know like he just opened up the full set of ninja turtle action figures
it's like 92 he's. He's got all four.
Maybe Splinter.
Maybe Shredder and a foot soldier.
I may or may not be speaking from experience of one of the dopest Christmases ever.
I wish I could.
I miss Christmas as a kid.
I miss toys.
Yeah.
Christmas as a kid was pretty tight.
Oh, so tight.
Anyways, and that's what the judge says
I stayed home like
Do you remember what he says about
Bombay's license too
12 moving violations in 3 years
Right you know what it is
That's a lot
That is a lot
Like how do you still have a license
It's just because he's such a
Shithead lawyer
That is a lot For 3 years do you still have a license it's just because he's such a head lawyer that's the only way he's
done that is a lot for three years like yeah that's that's that's four a year and so that's
that's one every quarter yeah like that is absurd like it just i i can't i can't believe that oh and
for those of you at home that's uh just traffic tickets, speeding tickets, like whatever.
Yeah, moving violations is, yeah, speeding ticket.
Even like running a stoplight.
Running a stoplight.
It's just a traffic violation.
A legal turn.
Yeah.
Any of that stuff.
But usually, I don't know about Minnesota in the early 90s,
but usually it's based on like a points system.
So like you have like say you have
like 12 points on your license like a speeding ticket depending on the severity of it would be
like three points or two points or if you're like crazy speeding sometimes it'd be like five points
you know yeah if you're going like 40 or 50 over yeah and then once you run out of points your
license is suspended um you gotta like retake courses to get it back.
Yes.
So I don't know how Minnesota in the early 90s was.
Maybe he just fucking Bombay sweet talked his way out of it.
Just sleeping with court reporter after court reporter to get out of the suspension of license.
100%.
Not going to happen this time.
Frank's not going to let it happen.
Oh, got to go for the w right gordo
yeah yeah the judge the judge says the judge says because bombay is like okay let's cut to the point
what what's going to happen here suspension of license fines and the judge goes yep all of that
unless the da uh wants to uh like bargain plead to lesser charges which is i'm assuming that's
how he got out of the other ones is he just like pled to lesser charges.
Yeah. But yeah, Frank, Frankie,
Frankie boy's not having it. He's he's going
for the W. He's going for the kill.
I love it. And then the
defendant is released on
his own cognizance.
Recon, recognizance, recognizance.
Something like that. I think
either way, I think we all mess. We both messed it
up multiple times there, I think, but whatever. think but whatever either way essentially yeah he's he's free to walk um
but he's you know he's and so so then is that when it cuts right to him at night in the lawyer
yeah he's back in the he's back in the office um taking notes by lamplight mr Mr. Duxworth. He's trying to find a fucking loophole for his D.
Once again, I was in my word.
And it goes back to like Coach Riley.
That experience had such a crazy impact.
So, you know, if you're a coach out there,
and same thing for Brandon's Parenting Corner,
you better listen up. Your words have impact and meaning.
And you help create 40-year-old alcoholic lawyers that can't stop winning.
He's probably like 29, 28 in this.
Maybe 30.
Maybe I just wanted him to be older because I don't want him to be younger than me in this movie, Brandon.
That means I'm old.
Because 73 was the Pee Wee Championship
and he was, we'll say 10, right?
10 I think is what we're going with for how old they are.
Maybe 10 or 11.
And this would be 1992.
So like 30?
31?
Well, you'd add 9 years, so he'd be
or not 9 years, 19 years.
So he'd be like 29, 30, something like that all right well shit he is younger than me in this movie and that makes me feel old so
yeah he's a he's a decorated lawyer wow well i haven't done shit how many how many how many
court reporters have you slept with he's huh none you know i don't i don't have a i don't have a
court reporter on on the notch on my bed
yeah well you're doing something wrong he's doing something wrong so anyways get on bombay's level
i could never get on bombay's level i don't have that kind of game with the moms
um but we got ducksworth and i still can't believe bombay is like gearing up to fight
and ducksworth just shuts him down and he's like like, all right, cut the shit, dude.
Like enough.
You're not going to drag this company's good name through the mud.
You're going to plead guilty.
He's just so dead set on winning, on beating this.
I'm not letting Frankie Boy get the best of him.
I'm not going to let him beat me.
He's after my throat.
Yeah.
It's like he said, the coaches best of him. He's after my throat. Yeah. It's like
he said, the coaches and the
parents, I think we talked about this
with Sophie from Game Changers
in the last episode.
When she gets, when she's
actually hurt, and
everybody's, even her parents are telling
her, no, you can't play. And she's
sitting there like, you motherfuckers told
me to win at all costs, and now you don't want me to play like that kind of pressure and that kind of mentality
you can't unlearn no without some serious work yeah and like that's what like bomb like i literally
put like dude all that winning all that like he's gonna need therapy like and that and that goes
back to it too like
duckworth is forcing him to take a break like have you ever seen that meme that's on instagram where
it's like maybe if i never take my time off and i work through my lunches and it's someone slowly
putting clown makeup on and if i never use my pto or sick time the company will appreciate and
promote me and then by the end they just are
in clown makeup like use your fucking time off man don't be like bombay don't win at all costs
use your time off stay fresh and then you'll keep your job for longer yeah you know but anyway so
there um he wants him to go he's gonna do community service yeah so So the judge made him do community service probation
suspension. Yeah.
And I'm sure there was a fine in there
as well. Yeah. And then
Duxworth says my
stipulation is you take a leave
of absence from the firm. Yeah.
Yeah. Which he wants to learn
compassion and fair play. What they should
have done is they should have made some fucking therapy.
Well, I guess the 90s nobody did. Nobody cared about therapy in the 90s but he should have he should
have got a therapy for sure yeah or an aa meeting something yeah something dude needs to talk his
issues out because he's still reliving trauma of his dad dying and his coach sociopath coach like like mentally manipulating him and psychologically torturing him
as a small kid like man anyways we will get into that in a different episode but poor bombay like
he needs to go talk to somebody we talk about that a lot on the podcast like kids go talk to
somebody man yeah it's talk it out it's good for you it's good for you. But he honestly gets a pretty
fucking good deal. So they're
keeping him on retainer and he gets
a limo.
Duxworth says,
you have to take a leave of absence, but
you're a crazy good lawyer.
And I think
Duxworth says,
learning compassion through community service
is going to make you a better lawyer.
Compassion and fair play. A to make you a better lawyer yeah so i'm gonna shoot him fair play it's a better person a better lawyer so he's gonna keep him on salary during his leave of absence so he's not getting any pay doc which
what a fucking deal especially in the early 90s nobody's nobody's paying you for a leave of
absence yeah that's crazy and giving you a limo, he's giving him a company paid limo to transport him around while his license is suspended.
And that's where we get my boy, MC Ganey.
Yeah, because here we go. We're cutting over to where in the limo, I literally have in my notes, your boy up here,c gainey um and his quote to start it off is in the 70s i drove the tour bus for
grand funk railroad god i bet that was dope well then then he doubles down and i forget if he says
something in between that and this but then he starts talking about he's like i i don't regret
anything except the 80s yeah he's like that was the life man the chicks the parties that's right amps
cranked up to about a bajillion decibels but it was uh the music was so loud they said it
damaged my hearing but i have no regrets though except for the 80s dude he just stole the show
right there he really did he really did he crushes it dude he's so and oh it's so funny so i i gotta
believe there's extra scenes in this movie where he is more involved with the team because he's he's
he's in the limo throughout the movie he's driving the limo and you see him um i think so I think it's just the championship game.
I'm trying to remember.
He's like running on the ice with them.
He's always in the bench.
I think he's not always on the bench.
He's on the bench for the championship game, though, for sure.
Which that leads me to believe.
And he's got his own fucking jersey that he's wearing on the bench in the championship game.
That leads me to believe that he was more involved than the
final cut of the movie like there was there's there's got to be some scenes where he's at
he's helping at practice or doing something you know you would figure because it's like literally
just the the um the limo scenes there's one scene i forget exactly what scene it is but there's a
scene where he's like running around with them on the ice or something and then he's on the bench for the championship game and it's like why why is the fucking limo driver on
the bench of the champ for the championship game if he if he wasn't more involved you know like it
was just such a weird thing to see him randomly pop up on the bench so i gotta believe there's
more scenes with mc gainey like with the kids or at practice or, and then they just got cut, but yeah, you gotta love MC Ganey.
My favorite is, and we can, we'll talk about it later,
but my favorite favorite is when he's dangling Peter upside down.
Yeah. Well, Peter's eating his bag of candy.
We'll talk about that later. We'll get into that.
As someone who's very sensitive about candy.
He's just got a bag of candy in his glove box. I love candy. So we'll get into that. We'll get into that as someone who's very sensitive about he's got a he's just got a bag of candy in his glove box dude i love candy so we'll get into that we'll get into that so but and so it
just kind of ends with like bomb baby and super pissed and mumbling to himself and then mc gamey
um i can't remember what his name is in the show oh lewis his name's lewis in the movie
and um lewis is just like cracking up to himself because he's just like oh god this fucking lawyer
what a prick you know like just cracking up to himself because he's just like, oh, God, this fucking lawyer. What a prick.
You know, like just cracking up to himself as he's talking.
And then it cut scenes from the limo to a part of the movie that I always forget is a part of this movie.
And it's our boy Carp all up in the dumpster.
Oh, the poop dollar, dude.
Yeah, dude.
The original poop dollar.
I was going to ask, do you think this is the first? Because it's i'm the original poop dollar i was i was gonna ask do you think this
is the first the first because it's obviously not the original but somebody did the poop dollar
before this but do you think that this is the first time the poop dollar was captured on film
i honestly think so because like i feel like this is where the poop dollar hit mainstream
yeah like that was more of like an underground type of joke that you and your
boys would do you know like maybe on one of the side streets yeah maybe an alley or something but
uh this this is where the poop dollar became yeah i i have to i have to believe it's the first poop
dollar captured on film and if anybody has uh confirmation one way or the other um please send
it our way i would love to I would love to figure that out.
And so Carp finds
a purse. He's super excited.
But as he's hopping... He's dumpster
diving. He's dumpster diving.
So I have the subtitles on
and did you hear what Averyman says when he comes out?
Yes. Yes. I was just
about to get into it. Dumpster Dave
comes through. It's lovely,
Carp. It goes with your eyes. I love that he calls into it dumpster Dave comes through it's lovely carpet goes with your eyes yeah
I love that he calls him dumpster
Dave which I
never crushes this I never realized
I never realized carp
uh carp's first name was Dave
yeah I
Dave carp I totally well I think
I think it's I think his last name is carp
men isn't it yeah it's called carp for
short yeah like yeah Dave Cartman yeah I I think his last name is Karp Men, isn't it? Yeah, it's Karp. Dave Karpman.
Yeah, I was...
Oh, wait, no, never mind.
The credits say just Karp.
Dave Karp.
There you go.
My bad.
But anyways, yeah, Averman is hilarious
throughout this first chunk of the movie.
And then Pio starts...
Oh, he's...
I got a lot of averman thoughts
uh when we get to the first practice uh oh he crushes it oh yeah i've got it perfectly quoted
i'm gonna i'm gonna make you let me read it through okay okay so stay tuned um but yeah so
then so then peter is like fucking with Carp and being like,
you're going to let Averman talk shit like that?
And then Carp's like, yeah, I'm going to beat your ass.
Peter does that multiple times in the movie where somebody makes fun of Carp
and Carp is just like so nonchalant to it at first until Peter's like,
are you going to let them do that?
And then Carp freaks out.
Dude,eter is the
worst peter fucking sucks dude peter's fucking guy he has small guy syndrome and he's an instigator
and his outfits are so fucking lame they're just so 90s they're so the outfits in this in this
whole movie are fucking amazing they're so good except yeah peter peter peter fucking sucks peter sucks wow
all right so so peter is your new cube right now no no no no no i'm just not i i liked cube the
character he just he was the terrible goalie for the first fucking uh eight episodes um peter as a
character sucks he's i i don't and i i honestly don't know how good peter is at hockey because i don't think
they ever show him playing hockey no he's just he's riding the pine he's got that short man
syndrome he's fine but then charlie comes running in we get charlie with a can of chili yeah oh yeah
yeah and then and then carp carp whistles for pd the stray dog and they feed him the chili
like this is great right like they're feeding they feed the dog the chili and then they're following him around with the purse and they're
waiting for him to take a shit so so it's 1992 these kids are 10 years old and they are wandering
around the streets of downtown minneapolis yeah dumpster diving dumpster diving they're the stores
they're walking by in that scene where they're following the dog They're walking by a billiard and cigarette hall
They walk by
Like a weird
It was like a tarot
Fortune reader or some kind of store
The 90s were the best
These were tough because we had to be
You were either tough or you died
But yeah just wandering around the mean streets of minneapolis all by themselves in the in the
winter oh god and i did you wait hold on before we like when they were following the dog around
did you we both have dogs did you have like flashbacks to dog walks of like just waiting
for for flapjack to take a dump because jenkins is the worst like he'll
he'll sniff like every piece of grass in the entire apartment complex and he'll like fake you
out while he's doing it he'll like like you'll like pull the poop bag out like you'll get gearing
up and he'll like sniff something and it'll be off and he'll be like nope and then it'll be another
fucking 20 minutes of sniffing around and he'll be like kind of like every time he has to find like
the most exact perfect spot it just it's fine you know he's a dog and i want to give him that space
but it really drives me fucking nuts flapjack flapjack is the fucking worst out of dude
the really drives me fucking crazy because he's he's very i don't know what the proper term is
but he gets distracted real easy.
So if I,
and I don't have like,
I don't have a backyard I can let him out into.
So I have to take him out,
out front.
And so I take him out front and there's two.
So there's,
so he,
he just gets real distracted,
real easy to where if something catches his attention,
he completely forgets that he has to go to the bathroom,
you know?
So like,
well,
I'll go outside, he'll pee. And then he'll be like getting ready to go to the bathroom you know so like well i'll go outside
he'll pee and then he'll be like getting ready to go to take a dump or whatever and you know a
neighbor will come out or there's like two stray cats that are roaming around our neighborhood so
they'll pop up and he'll get distracted there and then just completely forget that he has to go to
the bathroom and it's like so we're sitting out there for like 30 minutes and it's like motherfucker
go to the goddamn bathroom and i can't i might i'm sure my neighbors hate me because there's been countless times where i'm
just sitting out front and i'm like yelling at him like flapjack go to the fucking bathroom dude
i love it i love it i knew this i knew this might trigger that's why i brought it up
i love flapjack though he's he's he's he's an asshole but he's he's he's good he's oh
yeah and like he's my asshole you and you don't like you get frustrated because it's just like
come on dude but like you know like they gotta work it out just like 90 force a good thing
90 of it is uh is my fault 90 of it is 100 my fault because so great great man the the reason i usually the what leads to me like yelling at
him to go to the bathroom is because i timed my morning terribly and i'm like i need to be doing
something like i need to like hop on a work meeting or i need to like you know log in and
send an email in like those guys in like five minutes and i just like for whatever reason didn't
think to take him out until that moment and so then it's like come on dude i got i have something
i need to fucking do you need to go to the bathroom you know uh i love it so we've got the
origination of the poop dollar the kids are carrying the purse back down the street it's
it they're holding it out it's it's kind of a funny scene as they're like taking their nose so they put it out they stick the dollar bill kind of facing out of the purse
so they behind the car they leave this in the weirdest spot i think and they leave it in a
weird spot and the fact that the guy who sees it and even saw it in the first place is astonishing
yeah but not only does he stop to pick it up, he just quickly grabs the purse, looks around, hops back in the car.
And the kids make the mistake of because he takes off.
And so the kids go running out and then he throws it and they burst out laughing and he sees them in his rearview mirror.
Yes. Yeah. So, yeah. So they drop it on the side of a road on like a snow
little bank yeah um and the dude's driving and he's driving like a like a crazy like uh
it's like a red i forget what car it was but it's like a red like shitty little sports car
he's driving and he's i don't know how he sees it on the side so he stops he goes he picks up the dog he picks up
the purse puts the dollar back in the purse closes the purse and then what like walks around gets in
his car and starts to leave and he makes it a couple feet like yeah he starts driving and then
you you he i guess they don't show this but he he opens the purse i guess he sees that it's just a
purse of shit and then he whips
it out the window whips it out the window and that's when they like wander out and they're
like oh my well i think pete doesn't peter because they were expecting like oh my god he's taking off
with it yeah they were expecting him to open it right away yeah and be like oh shit they thought
they would like keep their dollar because he would just be like oh oh my god there's dog shit in this purse it smells like they were holding it out because it smelled so bad
yeah so they so they were expecting him to just like open it throw it and then run away but he
brings it into his car and then whips it out the window and so their car yeah carp says i are peter
says this guy gets what he fucking deserves yeah he doesn't say fucking but um i can't believe that he whips it
around and starts chasing them and then not only starts chasing them jumps out of this car to chase
them on foot through like back alleys and construction sites like what what is the point
of this in this movie like it's so fucking stupid uh and and the for the chase for the chase scene
they speed it up so it's like that comical like 90s like everything and then they got the sound
i know i was a little disappointed they didn't play like yakety sax in the background you know
oh my god and then and then it's super 90s too because he slips on the board and then he racks
himself yeah and and then and then falls over into some mud.
Yeah.
And then the kids celebrate on the rooftop.
And I had,
I pointed out he had this like massive gold chain.
Did you notice that?
So he was wearing,
he was a massive gold chain.
He had a,
like a John,
a Tam's and like a giant,
like puffy jacket.
And then I believe,
so I couldn't quite see,
but I believe he was wearing like a, like auffy jacket and then i believe so i couldn't quite see but i believe he was
wearing like a uh like a los angeles raiders hat um like the the black and silver um like baseball
cap for the raiders yeah well in 92 when yeah they would have been los angeles then right i forget
exactly when they were los angeles versus oakland yeah i can't remember i just i just noticed his chain yeah he had the gold chain and i believe it was like a i believe it was
a raiders um baseball hat that he had on as well and then yeah tim's in the puffy jacket
the fact that he chased them down those alleys and stuff like what a psycho
he's hopping fences running through running through like little fucking concrete tubes yeah like why
is he doing all this like they got
you with the poop dollar move on
you know
can't let him win
I guess but so anyways he was probably
a hawk that's what he was probably a hawk
that's just a weird scene
for them to just draw that's our introduction
into yeah that's the first scene
that's the first scene with half the kids and it's i guess it's just setting them up as like
district five kind of like you know they're on their own they're a little rougher around the
edges you know kids yeah yeah um and so bombay's back in the limbo with uh with mc gainey just for
a little bit as they're driving up to the ice.
And he's like, well, where is it?
He's like, well, look for a sign that says personal hell.
He's like, I hate kids.
They're barely even human.
And so it's just really setting the tone for how Bombay is going to approach this first practice.
And so they pull up to the pond in the limo and they see the kids
out there. They're playing some shimmy, right? Is that way? Yep. Yeah. Shimmy some pickup. Yep.
I'm a fucking hockey guy now. Not, not shimmy, shinny, shinny. Damn it. I was so close to being
a hockey guy. Um, I'll get there. I'll get there. I'm, I'm, I'm getting close. Um, but everyone's
just like falling all over the place and then they do
they go to a goldberg in the net and this is awesome this is this is the best goldberg because
so uh terry uh who's jesse's brother terry hall is uh shooting pucks and goldberg's not doing
anything he's just like fucking leave it and he's he's like yelling at goldberg he's like can you at
least try to stop a puck i get i'm so tired of chasing after them and then uh and like goldberg's like pleading with them
like hey buddy come on let's talk about this right like pleading like just please come on man
and he's like that he's like whoa bud that one almost hit me charlie goes yeah goldberg you're
the goalie it's supposed to hit you. And this is your favorite line.
This is your favorite line.
Does that sound crazy to anybody else?
Does that sound stupid to anybody else?
Yeah, does that sound stupid to anybody else?
You brought that up when we were talking about Kuba as the goalie
because you need someone who's not afraid to take a puck to the dome.
Yeah, being a hockey goalie requires a little insanity.
You know, so.
And then Bombay is, they're pulling
up and they're like stopping and Bombay is like,
good God. They think he's a fucking drug dealer
when he pulls up in the limo.
He's like, good God, that's the hockey team.
Just like, son of a bitch.
And I love that they all broach it like
Jesse gets out. Jesse has them all behind
them and they're like talking about how.
That's a drug-free zone.
Yeah, you're in the wrong hood, bro.
I said, do you remember Dare?
Like the lion from Dare?
That didn't work, but it's fun to think about.
And do you remember what Jesse says to Bombay?
I have it verbatim.
It's great.
It's great.
He goes, I'm going to let you
get your sorry vanilla booty
out of here right now before we start
using your eyeballs for hockey pucks.
Oh, Jesse
got him.
They think he's a drug dealer.
Good for them.
Drug-free zone. Good for them.
I'm proud of them, honestly.
They showed him as little street kids, but they were shutting him down.
And I like that Bombay's like, thanks,
bro, but got business
to take care of here. And then he reaches in
and they all think it's a
gun. Averman's like, he's
got a gun. Stand back. And Ray's like, get out
of here. And then he's like, District
5, I'm your new hockey coach.
And they're like, yeah, right, dude. He's like district five i'm your new hockey coach and they're like yeah right
dude he's like frayed so dudes and then i love it he's like um he just lists three names he's like
averman dave conway charlie paul terry now here's the long and short of it. I hate hockey and I don't like kids.
And I love that they brought that back for the Game Changers TV series.
That was excellent.
And Peter's response, like, was that supposed to be a pep talk?
So speaking of lines they brought back for Game Changers,
sorry to go back a little bit, but if we go back to because this cracked me up.
So if you go back to the scene where right after the court hearing for his DUI and Bombay's late at night in the office and Duxworth comes in, Bombay goes, oh, Mr. Duxworth, what are you doing here and mr ducksworth reply he replies i own the place which is an exact quote
from game changers uh is it is it the second i forget what second or third episode when uh alex
is sitting in the ice palace at night and then bombay comes out for his solo skate and she's
like oh what are you doing here he goes i own the place yeah i don't know if that was a i don't know if that was a deliberate uh exact quote but i like to think of this
anyway back to the drug-free zone anyways so we're in the drug-free zone um and and he uh
he he gives them the long the short of it uh and then and then he says you know this i'm sure this
will be a real bonding experience.
Maybe one day one of you will write a book about it in jail.
Kids are like, fuck you, man. Don't talk to us like that.
And then he's like, is there a goalie?
It's like only for a little while and move it back to Philly.
Yeah. So I, so what I think happened there because little while and move it back to Philly. Yeah.
So I,
so what I think happened there because Goldberg doesn't move back to Philly.
He stays the whole,
the whole,
the whole season here.
So I,
cause,
and he,
so Goldberg does not want to be the goalie.
He makes that very clear.
He's like,
I don't want to be the fucking goalie.
So I think my thinking was brand new coach,
right? Comes in and he asks if there's
a goalie and it's not goldberg's he's wearing like a goalie mask and he's got a goalie stick
you can't be like no there's no fucking goalie here yeah so what he does is he goes i'm only
here for a little while because i'm moving back to philly my thinking is he says i'm only here
for a little while in hopes that bombay will be like well okay let's find a full-time someone else yeah let's find someone else and then he just gets out of being goalie i
think that's what he was trying to do there because he never he never moves i think they
touched i think they mention it at the beginning of the second one where he's like oh yeah my
parents just decided not to move or some shit like that like a quick little line but i don't
think they were ever i don't think they were ever planning a movie. Yeah. And then Bombay shoots him out onto the ice and Averman
is like, just so you know,
we really suck.
Is that when he goes, well, I'll be the judge of that.
And then two seconds later, he's like, oh, yeah,
you guys fucking suck. Yeah.
I said, like, it was like, yeah, it took
all of one second for him to
to come to the realization
that they suck.
And so the music builds and then it comes to my favorite
part of this whole thing are you ready for this ready go for it the peep meister mr rabble rouser
passing the puck over to jesse rooney the enforcer and then he gets hit and so he's like
ouch that hurt and then he's like oh the connie meister and then she levels him
and he's like the velvet hammer yes so i was i loved the nickname so connie he calls the velvet
hammer amazing so but pete pete mr rabble rouser that's why he's always talking shit he is the
rabble rouser and then 100 jesse the enforcer which makes sense because he's you know defending them against the drug dealer
and Connie dropped
the elbow that she taught to Maya
Lawrence yeah yeah I love that
and so Connie is like
that was a great like Averman is
is just
a gem in this
first part what a sick ass fucking
nickname to you though the Velvet Hammer
the Velvet Hammer the The Velvet Hammer.
Dude, you're...
People...
Connie is very underrated in this movie.
And, like, did you...
We'll talk...
Her gear in that first game...
We'll talk about it when we get there eventually, but...
Oh, man.
All the gear is ridiculous.
Her helmet has a peace sign on the front of it.
I thought that was so excellent.
I love that. And then I love that they are all just wearing shit they brought from home and then they just
like i don't know if it was like tape or if they wrote it on there like yeah it just they just
wrote d5 on all their shirts yep it's amazing and connie's is sparkly yeah so ridiculous um
and so she goes over to bombay, and this is a great interaction, too.
And she's like, do you play?
And he's just like, yeah, whatever.
What's our record?
And she's like, oh, a nine.
Oh, a nine.
One was pretty close.
We only lost by five.
And we almost scored.
And they almost scored.
And he was just like, oh, shit.
And so then the rest of the team starts to like
come over to him and this is i love this part too this always cracked up my dad like my dad
just would laugh so hard at this part where he's like uh where the team gathers around he's like
all right so what do we do now coach he's like well what did your old coach tell you to do
like yeah he just yelled a lot until he hurt his arm and then pete does
the reenactment he's like you you bastards so much you skate you little beth
and he like thanks to heart attack and he's what a terrible coach just screaming bastards at these 10 year old kids screaming you little bastards like come on man that's so funny
and then bumping's like son of a bitch it's a hard you died of a heart attack
in front of the kids yeah that's a traumatic life experience they watched their last coach
have a heart attack well they they clearly didn't realize that it was a heart attack oh that was
awesome i loved everything about that um so bombay's like oh shit go like you you you versus
you you and you you four go play and then he's gonna he's like so the worst is a very stephanie
part where he's like i'm gonna go make a phone call i'm gonna script you guys keep scrimmaging
that's where they're like oh we have names you know he's like yeah i'm going to go make a phone call. I'm going to script. You guys keep scrimmaging. And that's where they're like, oh, we have names.
You know, he's like, yeah, I'm sure you do.
I bet they're very nice names.
I might even learn them.
But for now, I'll be in my office.
And then he tells them to fax him.
If you need me, fax me.
Like every single one.
And then and then Averman comes back again.
So this is what this is what I wanted to talk about with Averman.
First of all, the Velvet Hammer nickname was fantastic.
But then this.
So Bombay goes into the limo, and then Averman's talking to Connie,
and they're skating back, and he goes –
well, give me the exact quote.
You got the exact quote on you?
Yeah, he goes, geez, what a jerk.
Where do they find these coaches anyways?
We're impressionable kids, right?
Shouldn't we check his qualifications?
Yeah, shouldn't we check his qualifications yes which yes why is
nobody checking his qualifications the dude just got arrested for a dui why are we making him the
coach in reckless endangerment why is he in charge of children he has an outstanding reckless
endangerment charge and then he recklessly endangers the lives of all these children
by driving them in a limo on the ice like it's just you're right like his qualifications are
terrifying and charlie's mom had every right to be pissed but of course his kids were like
jeez charlie's mom what a fun sponge yeah you know She just sucks the fun right out of here.
I love Averman's line so much.
Somebody should be checking his qualifications.
Yes, you are
impressionable, kids.
You shouldn't look like a drug dealer
in a limo pulling up.
That's great stuff.
Bombay's in the car
talking to Jeannie on the phone.
Bad Mouth and Jane.
Bad Mouth and Jane talking shit.
It does a great spit take, though.
Emilio does a really good spit take there.
Did you, with the subtitles on, did you see that in the background,
Goldberg yelled, one, two, three, charge.
Like, I never noticed that until i uh watched it with subtitles
on and so they're attacking the limo and i love they're like blowing on the windows yeah they're
like doing raspberries on the windows climbing on top shaking it and bombay is like screaming at
them let's get out of the car monkeys little monkeys And then they start
Jumping in the car
Jesse grabs the phone
Takes it away from him
Peter starts the rivalry
With Lewis about taking the candy
Yeah
As they start
Do you hear what Lewis says though
As they start the we want a ride chant
He turns to Bombay and he goes
Sir I can kill one
of them just to set an example yes i oh man he just that was excellent like that was so
just absolutely so funny and so he's just like uh not not yet lewis that's what i love too
bobby's like not yet man uh just do it take him for a spin do anything
like I don't give a shit um and so they I love that they're driving around on the ice too and
did you see the people just like casually strolling in the background just yeah cool because the the
pond's in the middle of a park so there's like a playground in the background yeah there's people
walking strollers it's just like a limo in the middle of the eyes you know oh man and and so um they're in there uh peter is still stealing candy there's
a little bit of tension um connie says she feels like madonna averman uh mentions that it can seat
10 comfortably i hope you saw that lewis is uh and then lewis grabs peter and starts strangling him
and growling at him while he's driving on the ice like this is just the most absurd scene and then
all of a sudden we get um we get gold we get everyone sniffing the air. This is like super 90s stuff too. We're sniffing
the air and then all of a sudden,
Goldberg?
Then he's like, it wasn't me
and Bombay's yelling at him,
young man, what'd you eat?
Do you think it was Goldberg though? We don't get any
confirmation. It was 100%
Goldberg.
I don't know. It was either Goldberg or he needs to i don't know it was either goldberg
or connie because whoever smelled whoever smelt it dealt it dude and i would not i mean that is
i would not be surprised connie's in there with a whole bunch of boys might feel a little bit
embarrassed for breaking wind that is so smelly and she was the first one that smelt it so there
is a very good chance that she was in fact the one
that dealt conspiracy theory you heard it here first connie was actually the one who farted in
the limo yeah and that's the perfect time if you're a girl that's the perfect time to rip one
is when you're surrounded by guys because then yeah you just play dumb and you blame it on them
just it's it's easy because none of them are going to turn around and be like no that was you connie you know
that would be very rude to them i i felt the upholstery vibrate that shit was you connie
and that's how gee and connie met
no so but then then charlie pops up and he's like oh my god it's my mom she looks pissed do you see
what bombay does when he says he just shoves he just shoves charlie to the ground charlie like
pops up in front of bombay and goes oh shit that's my mom and bombay hearing that there's a mom coming
he's like i need to get my eyes on this so he grabs charlie by the side of the face and
fucking throws him down out of his view so he can look at his mom.
So amazing.
It is a beautiful, beautiful moment.
So that's when we get.
So his mom comes running out on the ice.
Casey Conway, Mrs. Casey Conway or Miss Casey Conway because she's single.
Right.
Yeah.
So she comes out and she starts yelling at Bombay.
And I love
the scene. Do you have what
she says? Because she has some just nonsense
fucking lines that she gives.
Oh, I didn't
write down the exact.
It's like, no matter
how comfortable you are with it,
that's my kid.
She's yelling at Bombay and she's like, how could you take these kids out on the ice and bombay is like i i know the ice the
ice isn't gonna break i've i and she's like no yeah she's like how the fuck do you know and he's
like i just know and so she goes this is what she goes well i don't care how comfortable you are i
don't care she i forget the exact quote but she says something along the lines of i don't care how in tune you are with the ice universe she calls it the ice universe
wait wait well listen mr zen master you may be in tune with the ice universe but when it comes to
my kid i just know doesn't cut it yes i was at the wrong part of my notes i got you i love
i love that she called it the ice universe mr zen master in tune with the ice universe but like could you imagine if the limo
goes through the ice oh dude a minnesota state tragedy like oh like that is bad That's like 15 10 year old kids
That died in a limo
And drowned
Like that's fucking crazy
But while she's yelling at him
They're just district 5 kids
Wouldn't be that big of a loss
Just fucking street kids
We saw it earlier
Dumpster diving kids
Dumpster Dave
And then it pans out
And it shows Lewis yelling and screaming at Peter, dangling him upside down.
He's got him by one leg.
He's holding him up, just dangling.
Yeah.
And then his bag of candy is just spilling out onto the ice.
Oh, and this is where, like, it looked like there were some Jolly Ranchers, maybe some Wurthers Originals.
It was a great like some of those grandma strawberries maybe some you know like some some uh top of the line
uh caramels and stuff oh yeah man like it looked like some good car me i would i would have i would
have taken out peter for that fucking candy oh i would i would have punched him i would have
punched him in the face for eating my candy. No question about it.
Good God.
You broke his jaw
and then you're in prison. You're not even coaching
hockey with Bombay.
I'm not in prison.
There's no way
Peter's parents
are coherent enough
to have press charges
against me.
There's like a 90 chance that peter
has just there's a present parents that are there's a 90 chance that he lives in a dumpster
wow peter dude you're starting to make me feel sorry for him have you seen the kid
looks a little rough but do you do you like that uh the bombay's like well i guess practice is over
we got busted driving on the ice and then charlie's like sorry well, I guess practice is over. We got busted driving on the ice.
And then Charlie's like, sorry, my mom ruined it, guys.
Yes, of course she ruined it.
That's very dangerous.
And then it ends in the most insane way possible.
And this is where we're going to wrap things up here at the 19 minute
mark, but coach, you're going to be at the game tomorrow.
Yes. And then Bombay goes, you know,
by the order of the state of Minnesota. Yeah. Yes. But just so my,
so you can, so the previous coach died of a heart attack, right.
And he was screaming bastards at everybody.
I'm imagining they
probably had another coach or two probably somewhere along the lines right you know the
guy screaming bastards and having heart attacks probably hasn't been the coach forever but you
can tell how bad of a history they have with coaches where charlie has to ask his coach if
he's going to be at the game tomorrow. Yeah.
And when,
when would you,
when would your coach ever not show up?
Sorry.
It's some sort of health scare,
you know, like a heart attack,
but so they have trauma from coaches not showing up,
but then the witness one almost die.
And then to,
to kind of like just really devastate any potential trust, Bombay just lets them know straight up, I would not be here and I would not be coaching you if I wasn't ordered by the state of Minnesota.
Yeah.
And like –
Unreal.
That's like – because Connie brings that up in the episode six of Game Changers when they have the little reunion show and bombay's being
an and flaking out because he didn't get invited to the gala you know and connie's just
like is it going to take another court order for you to for you to hang out with us bombay
so you know there's there's still still to this day feeling that that trauma yeah that is absolutely insane that they had to that they had to ask that so
anyways that just goes to show you how bad of a place bombay is in the the sparkle of the minnesota
miracle man has not yet gleaned in itself we're we're we are a long way from Coach Bombay. We're still alcoholic DUI Bombay, for sure.
Yeah, and it's just, you hate to see it,
but it's the origin of a troubled Bombay.
The origin of troubled Bombay.
It's the story of the Phoenix.
We got to hit rock bottom before we can rise up.
Yeah, we're in those ashes right now,
but we're gearing up for that rise.
We're getting close.
We're on those ashes right now, but we're gearing up for that rise. We're getting close. We're on the cusp.
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Okay, everyone, that's all for the show today.
So we're stopping right around the 19 minute mark.
And then for part two,
we're going to be covering the movie from minutes 19 to 42.
So please make sure to join us in two weeks for that part two.
That's where we're going to continue our detailed breakdown of one of the
greatest movies of the nineties,
the mighty ducks.
Yes.
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