The Cake Eaters - 33. Bill & Ted's Bogus Journey (Joss Ackland)

Episode Date: June 7, 2022

Heath & Brandon discuss Heath's apprehension towards time travel, Brandon's love for Point Break, their favorite Keanu Reeves movies, the excellence that is the Bill & Ted cinematic universe, how Missy Is the girl version of Bombay, and then breakdown the rest of Bill & Ted's Bogus Journey in all its bodacious glory. Follow us at www.thecakeaterspod.com and on Twitter (@thecakeeaters) and Instagram (@thecakeeaterspod) Email us at [e-mail]

Remember, it's not worth winning if you can't win! Welcome to the most non-heinous podcast in the world, Party Deals. It was the worst guitar riff I've ever heard in my entire life, but we'll go with it. Welcome to the Cake Eaters podcast, everybody. That was Heath. My name's Brandon. And if you didn't catch by the intro, today we're talking about the 1991 classic Bill and Ted's Bogus Journey. Oh man, I'm still recovering from trying to do a guitar riff. That's the worst guitar riff.

It sounds terrible to you. I got nothing oh man we just that's homework we're not as cool as alex winter or kiana reeves so we we is anyone as cool as kiana reeves so brandon that's a never probably the coolest guy on on earth right? Oh, for sure. Hands down. Yeah. Hands. Well, top five for sure. Yeah. Top five for sure. Like the last movie we talked about, Little Big League, Ken Griffey Jr.

Probably top five too. You know? Yeah. Coolest people ever. I would maybe put Ken Griffey Jr. above Keanu as far as cool. Because Keanu can't hit a home run and then wink at you as he rounds second base. No, but Keanu is – he's just like a really nice, down-to-earth guy who is a very, very successful actor. And how often does that happen?

It makes him like a unicorn. For sure. For sure. To not be a complete sociopath of an actor but anyway so anyway we're talking about bill and ted's bogus journey um not to be confused with bill and ted's excellent adventure that's true for for anybody that's that's not well versed with the bill and ted universe there are three bill and ted movies the first one came out 1989 which is bill and ted's excellent adventure and it's a pretty excellent movie so i would recommend it yeah it's a good movie it's a great um it's a great time travel movie parody yeah and so and

i think that's where the second one struggles a little bit is it becomes a parody of a parody and you're just – you're – You get a little lost at sea. Yeah. You get – they needed – As the kids would say, you get lost in the sauce. Yeah. And boy, did they. But it's – do – so like I just have a random question off the top of my my head real quick for you here brandon

how do you feel about time travel movies because like personally the butterfly effect is like one of my biggest fears and it like time travel one of your biggest fears okay oh dude it time travel movies give me so much fucking anxiety because of the butterfly effect i generally don't enjoy them as much as i should like especially even like the comic book stuff i struggle with like the the time travel you know like avengers endgame love that movie but the time travel stuff you have constant anxiety of of changing things is that what it is you know i know for a fact because the butterfly effect is i'm trying to think of the right word the only word that comes to mind is terrifying but i don't know if i want to i don't know if that's what i want to use but it's a scary premise

you and like when did you watch butterfly effect was that the first time travel movie you ever watched no but i did watch that right when it came out like and what did that come out like in the 98 99 or something like that so it's like in my early teens butterfly show good old fulton reed oh yeah such a good movie but it really does trip me up and that's a movie we'll we'll definitely talk about for sure listen i and i'll start the new conspiracy theory right now i will say that in in february of 2020 a time traveler like stepped on a butterfly somewhere and just we have not recovered from it since it is senses down a dark timeline so i i get i get that i get the the anxiety especially watching after

watching butterfly effect i get the time travel whole anxiety but i think if you so i i i'm neither here nor there for time travel movies it's fine whatever i don't you know it doesn't give me anxiety or anything i will say um best time travel movie ever unpopular opinion time traveler's wife i don't even know if i know what that's just it is i was a joke that's one of best time travel movie ever, unpopular opinion, Time Traveler's Wife. I don't even know if I know what that movie is. I was just – I was just joking. That's one of the worst movies ever made. Is it a Hallmark movie?

No, no. It's Rachel – is it Rachel McAdams? I think Rachel McAdams is it. Oh, okay. It's based on a book, but it's a terrible movie. But anyway, time travel movies, I think you're coming at it from the butterfly effect mindset where everything is going to change no matter what. Whereas I think you need to come at it from a Bill and Ted mindset, which is the past and the future are already written. If you time travel, that's what you were supposed to do, so nothing is going to change.

Oh, okay. Okay. That is a most excellent and non-heinous description of time travel that's my favorite fucking trope that they hammer home in the first one and definitely in this one which is it's a time travel movie so at the end when they're like fighting for their lives they there's no there's never any like tension or anything because they always just think to themselves you know what uh since we're time traveling if we win this we'll just go back in time and give us everything we need to win and then we'll win because we went back in time and

gave us everything we need to win and then that's just what happens it's the the vet the way they do it is fucking fantastic and it's the best part of these movies because it's like it's such a it's the the vet they the way they do it is fucking fantastic and it's the best part of these movies because it's like it's such a it's the parody of time travel movies where it's like well we'll just we'll just give us everything we need at the right time you know like the the the i think it's the first the first movie when um they're trying to get the key the uh keanu's dad's keys and they're like they're outside of the uh keanu's dad's keys and they're like they're outside of the police station and uh bill's just like you know what this is what we'll do we're gonna time travel back in time two days to when your dad had his keys then we're gonna steal it from him and then we're gonna put it right here and then two seconds later they're like oh here

are the keys we found them it's it's so fucking stupid but amazing it's uh it's my favorite part of these movies so i like this movie is is not super good but like i once again have another like youthful kind of like enjoyment of this because it we had all we had the movie channels growing up like my family loves tv and this is on hbo all the time and so if it was on i would always just leave it on and i would always watch it in the background but like going back there and i was like what did i love so much about this movie as a kid that whenever no matter what part of the movie it was on, if I turned the channel, I was like, oh, sweet, Bill and Ted. That's what you love is the guitar riffs and then Keanu and Alex Winter just talking nonsense, dude. Oh, that is probably because it just cracked me up.

This movie's got super bodacious vibes, Heath. Super bodacious, heady vibes for sure. And Mama D is a real stickler for grammar too like she she wouldn't even let you say ain't you know she like ain't ain't a word you sound like an idiot like don't don't talk like that not in my house you know and so i just this she was a big bill and ted fan then huh yeah not a not a super big bill and ted fan i guess you could say but yeah this movie i don't know what it was i watched it all the time as a kid and i remembered it all coming back to it's like god how did i like this movie see i when i was watching it as i was watching it i was

remembering it all especially the fucking alien creatures those things i was like oh that's where these things are from now that now i remember but i was alien creatures and how they like run into each other and stations oh my god that made no sense i had completely forgotten what happened in the first one so when before i watched the second one i went back and watched the first one uh so i spent a good what five five almost six hours uh watching bill and ted this weekend it was uh it was too much honestly too much yeah i bet you feel just a little bit dumber wait they might go ahead go ahead i was gonna say like the other like just crazy wrinkle that i another like something i thought was hilarious as a kid was when they melvin'd the grim reaper and then the grim reaper

like god is like dude how did you let these idiots like get out of death and he's like they melvin'd me and then he uh for the listeners that melvin is a wedgie and then they gave death a wedgie and then death melvin's uh hans at the end yeah i forgot yeah oh my god should we talk about hans and how that's why we're breaking down this movie real quick the reason we're talking about bill and ted's bogus journey is because hans is in this movie hans joss ackland plays uh the bad guy um and his name does a great job uh he does a fantastic job uh yeah he crushed it in the movie is uh uh chuck denomos yeah denomos yes um so he plays the bad guy so so for for anybody not familiar with bill and ted with the bill and universe, let me break it down for you. The first one came out in 1989, and I'm going to break down the plot.

Since I forgot the plot of the first one, I'm going to break down the plot for everybody. Okay, Heath? Sounds good. Hit it. The plot of the first one is George Carlin, who's in both of these movies. George Carlin plays Rufus. He goes back in time to 1988 to make sure that Bill and Ted passed their history exam so that they can fulfill their destiny as the greatest band ever, whose music brings peace to the universe. Right? Rufus played by the one and only George Carlin.

Yes. And then so that's the plot of the first one. So that's where we're ending that's where we're ending 1989. Then there was, there was a bill and Ted TV series. Did you know about this? When I was looking at, there's a bill and Ted TV series in like during 1990,

I forget, uh, um, how many episodes there were, but it was real. I was real weird when I was looking into that, but, uh,

so then bill and Ted's bogus journey, which is the one we're talking about, the second one, comes out in 1991. That's where we're at right now, Heath. Let me break down just briefly the plot for the second one. sends robots that are made to look like bill and ted back in time to kill bill and ted so that they don't win battle of the bands and they don't fulfill their destiny um because what happens in the first movie is they pass the history exam which then leads them to to stay together and form the Wild Stallions band. And the Wild Stallions become the greatest band ever. They bring peace to the universe. And so in the future, the entire society is based around Bill and Ted.

They're like gods. So they worship the Wild Stallions. Wild Stallions music is always playing. There's a Bill and Ted university. They're like gods. Did you like how the future looked in the 90s like that was did you see that was something else fucking moon boots yes i put that down like the biggest shoes i've ever seen in my whole entire life and then everything was made out of neoprene like like

it just didn't make any sense at all like what were we thinking like z xenon girl of the 21st century did the same fucking ridiculous stuff with what the future would be like well xenon had xenon had better looking or better like fitting clothes because in this movie they're all wearing super baggy stuff it's all made out of neoprene um and it's all like super brightly colored xenon it was all still super brightly colored but it was like normal clothes you know it was like yeah there were skirts and like it was normal clothes just made into ridiculous colors um but so so that's the reason so hans sends the robots back in time to kill bill and ted so that

the future society is not based around bill and ted it'll be based around him instead as his grand plan yeah um and so yeah so that's that's that's the second movie uh i have some fun facts for you heath if you want if we want to talk fun facts before we delve into it a little bit. Yeah, we can talk some fun facts. I'm down. So my first fun fact is Bill & Ted's Bogus Journey is the only movie ever made that has the Grim Reaper and the Easter Bunny in the same movie. Like the most horrifyingly weird Easter Bunny, too. Yeah.

You made your little brother cry, Theodore. But it's the only movie ever to have both those characters in it. Okay. All right. Did you notice how they say the word station a lot randomly for no reason yes the reason that that happened is because the the when the writers were writing it they uh they were in a punch drunk state. And that caused them to write a typo for station in the wrong spot of the script. When they came to the script the next time and realized that that typo was there, they just decided to stick with it.

Oh, I feel like you could do like a little drinking game for station. That's what we need to start doing with these movies that are non-ducks movies brandon is we'll give them a cake rating and then we'll give drinking game options okay like every to every guitar riff you take a drink of your beer you know every time they say station you take a drink of a mixed drink so drunk so drunk they say they say station conservatively 35 times yeah it's you're gonna be house oh man it's the name it's the name of the the alien creatures too they call exactly and they're just calling them station and station but okay so that's so that's that that was a typo that they were just like you know what

fuck it leave it in oh that's awesome um the the my other fun fact is um are you are you a you know parks and rec right donna meagle oh yeah uh bill and ted's bogus journey is uh one of her three favorite movies did you know that well she lists her three favorite movies. Did you know that? She lists her, her favorite movies and their natural born killers, the remains of the day and Bill and Ted's bogus journey. Those are her favorite. Wow.

That is an insane top three movies. Amazing. Okay. So now that's a super fun. Now, now the, the kicker, the fun fact kicker I have for you here, very similar to Con Air, okay? Okay. Joss Ackland, Hans, has said in a Radio Times interview that he only did this project because of a bet between him and a family member.

And then he admitted that he regretted being in it. Wow. That's too bad. He should have no regrets. He fucking crushes it, dude. Yeah, I was just going to say he does such a good job. I don't know why he regrets it. And so some more timeline information for everybody this movie came out 1991 as you remember the ducks came out 1992 so this is a year before the ducks

okay and then um so yeah a year before hans does the ducks and then as far as we're talking about how cool keanu is as far as in the keanu timeline right this came out so the first one came out 1989 this came out 1991 and this was kind of his like first like motion picture big break like this is his his coming out party right was bill and ted yeah because you have later on in 1991 one of my favorite movies in the history of the world and no joke on this is point break point break comes out later 1991 i was wondering if you were gonna bring up point break because it is a great it's it's an dude keanu and patrick swasey yeah keanu and the sways yeah and they're yeah they're jumping out of airplanes they're shirtless half the movie

what more do you want what are they surfing too right it's been a while since i've seen it but that's how it starts off yeah yeah because he infiltrates their gang and yeah yeah oh dude like yeah don't even get me started on that movie it's very i love point break i think it's point yeah point break is not only the best Keanu movie of all time. It might be one of the best movies, hands down. You're going to say it's the best Keanu movie of all time. I don't know about that.

Brandon. Did you listen to it? Point break is one of. It is. If is one of, if not the best movie of all time. Okay. Not just Keanu period all movies ever wow i now i definitely need to go back and re-watch it just to see about that hyperbole because i don't i don't think it's i definitely don't think it's that because like you know

point break is honestly in my my top three movies of all time. What about the first Matrix movie for Keanu? That first Matrix movie was awesome. Get your Matrix bullshit out of here. I don't want to hear it. I loved the first John Wick movie too. The first John Wick is – I would put the first John Wick above the Matrix. Oh, for sure. I think the first John Wick is probably my favorite Keanu movie.

Dude, when they kill his little puppy that his dead wife gave him, I just, man, that was like a knife to the heart. That was rough. That was rough. That was, man, that'll hit you right in the feels you know if you if you aren't getting a little if you aren't chopping onions when that is taking place then you're not much of a human that's all i'm gonna say about that yeah but so just hate when people start chopping onions when i'm watching movies it's bullshit but so john wick is that your top

movie yeah yeah john The first John Wick. The other two are fine, like whatever. They're take them or leave them. But that first one is fucking awesome. First one, yeah, fantastic. I would probably put that number two behind Point Break for best Keanu movies. So the Keanu timeline, so you have – this is 1991. Point Break was later in 1991. And then 1992 was Draculaacula 1994 speed oh that was his

that yeah that was like the that was the speed broke him out of like the yeah like of his bill and ted like speed kind of like because they put him on the scene for everything the matrix was either 98 or 99 i forget which one but 98 99 somewhere in there uh but yeah so like this is you're catching keanu right before the blow up here yeah yeah right before he really takes off i fucking love point break dude i gotta i gotta figure out a connection for Point Break so we can talk about Point Break. That sounds good. I could talk about Point Break conservatively for three days. I mean, that seems a little intense, but that's fine.

That's fine. We can do that too. Okay. Back to Bill and ted focus yeah back because at the very beginning of the movie i took very diligent notes for like the first 15 to 20 minutes of this movie and then there was a moment where they lost me and i was like okay this i'm gonna pay attention but i'm not gonna take any notes so so so speaking of the the beginning of the movie after we get the the outfits everybody's fucking outfits yeah and then and then hans comes in and he reveals the robots yes when they rip off their faces that was so upsetting

yeah i don't know about you but i i know i grimaced. That was so upsetting when they rip off the faces. Yes, when they rip the mouth back to open it up. It was very unsettling. This might just be a me thing, but there's something so unnatural. About unhinging your jaw like a snake? Or peeling flesh from your face? There's something just terrifying about seeing a full set of teeth outside. Like where you can see the whole full set of teeth.

You know what I'm talking about? The robot head was clear so you could see the full set of fucking teeth. And they looked like real teeth. It was so upsetting or like just like like a whole set of dentures just sitting out on a table i don't know if it's just me but there's something so upsetting about teeth about being able to see the full set of like teeth and gum it's just ah weird to be the fuck out that is that is hilarious i yeah and then they they catch the they catch catch the ride out of there.

Catch you later, evil dude. Yeah. And then they're at Earth. So the other part about the beginning, when their manager's name being Miss Wardrobe. Did you catch that? Wardrobe. Oh, I thought the subtitle said Miss Wardrobe. Did you catch that? Wardrobe. Oh, I thought they said.

No, I thought the subtitle said Miss Wardrobe. I'm pretty sure it's. Dro. Yeah, it's Wardrobe. W. Oh, I thought it was Miss Wardrobe. And I was like, that is the dumbest fucking name I've ever heard. Well, I was Wardrobe, a.k.a. Rufus.

Pam Greer. Well, Pam Greer is the one who plays Miss Wardrow. But, spoiler alert for the end of the film, it was Rufus, George Carlin, all along, underneath. Yep. Just helping guide them to the Battle of the Bands. Exactly, because who else would put them in Battle of the Bands, Heath? No, nobody. battle of the bands exactly because who else would put them in battle of the bands no nobody but they but they have to win brandon because then if they win at the concert then they wanted to that was confusing too they wanted to win at the concert to propose to the ladies but then they proposed to the ladies at their 521st birthday party well they proposed to the ladies

at the 521st birthday party but then remember they get the call that they broke up with them oh that's right that's right so then they want to they want to re-propose at the yeah at the with some real some real um the princesses who are from medieval england i, by the way. Don't talk to me. I love that fucking joke where he's talking to me. Medieval England, Iowa. Yeah. That made me laugh way more than it should have.

Also, how did you feel about Bill knocking his eyeball out of the socket to be the transponder? Oh, yeah. I don't know how I felt about that. All the robot stuff was real rough. Yeah. When they were trying to sexually assault the princesses, that was rough. What else did they do? What about the robots and like they yeah they were real

people names they were real fucking evil names anymore yeah yeah they were really they really embodied the exact oh that's right they were they were they were throwing that they were throwing the f word around a lot yeah yeah it's not that wasn't gonna fly but yeah the the evil bill and ted were legit evil but we have before we move on from the beginning of the movie we have to talk about the elephant in the room which was was it what was her name the dad like don't don't act like missy fucking missy yeah missy was with bill's dad and divorced bill's dad who was looking real sad in the fucking corner. Yes. While he was watching Missy make out with Ted's dad right in front of him.

So, so for, for those who haven't seen the first one, Missy in the first movie, Missy, who's four years older than Bill. Cause in the first movie, they,

they mentioned a line. Keanu mentions a line of, remember when she was a senior and we were a freshman. Um, and then I think he, and then he says, uh, remember when she was a senior and we were a freshman Then I think he and then he says remember when I asked her to prom But so in the first movie Missy is dating Bill's dad Yeah, and they actually there's a scene in the first one I just this because I watched the first one right before I watch the second one There's a scene in the first one where bill's dad and missy

have uh sex in bill's room like on bill's back real real dick move real fucking dick move yeah um but so but so missy is dating bill's dad in the first one and so then in the second one kiano has the line it's it's a very uh you know very like game of thrones where everyone's just marrying each other well it's it's it's all missy missy loves the dads she's all about the dad she she married bill's dad divorced him married ted's dad and then successful police officer that's why and then later on at the end of the movie when they're rolling credits and all the newspapers are popping up about how you know about the future and what happens there end of the movie when they're rolling credits and all the newspapers are popping up about how you know about the future and what happens there one

of the newspaper headlines pops up and it says Chuck Denomolous who is played by Hans marries Missy so she divorces she divorces Ted's dad and then marries Hans at the end of the movie

and so after all of that all about the dads all about the dads did you also like their proposals she's the girl version of bombay dude oh yeah missy is the the girl version of bombay is going after the dads of the high school guys. I respect it. I love it. Knowing what you like is half the battle. But did you like their proposals to their girlfriends, Brandon, where they said the exact same speech but ever just so slightly different and they started like listing

the animals bills was about the desert right and then yeah ted's was about the ocean yeah and they're just like listing animals the best part is when they both list an animal that like doesn't live where they're talking about and then they both go and fix it they're like oh wait no that's uh fresh water oh it was i i love that but then this is where the movie lost me for note-taking and where i i still paid attention through the movie but i quit taking notes because they their girlfriends were going home and they're like man i wonder if their girls will ever stay overnight now that we're married yeah our girlfriends are most chase at least they're not dating our dads i mean that's a real line in that movie fair point by the way though

and i loved how they have trauma from high school girls dating their dads i love how they're uh renting and sharing a one-bedroom apartment yes they got the double beds yes it's so good uh and like their apartment is one of the messiest places i think i've ever seen and i used to live with the guy that's because the robots the robots trashed it that's why but even before the robots trashed it that was a very messy apartment during the party it wasn't messy i don't know man their their walls are cluttered with posters um it just but like the the the party like the floor and everything was was fine during the party it was once the robots

got there and they started fucking shit up i don't know brandon i thought i saw some some party trash all over the place because it reminded me of my i won't say his his name out loud but he used to um like when we would get pizza and if like all the plates were dirty rather than doing the dishes he would just tear off corners of the pizza box and warm up his leftover pizza on that instead there you go so that's economical it's not economic so watch the fucking dishes they would get so bad he would just throw them away because it was so caked in mold the dish would get so bad he'd he'd just throw him away yeah because it'd just be like full of mold okay yeah yeah it was foul college roommates were the worst he lost me there he lost me there yeah that's i mean that's what i'm saying i it was yeah it was something else i'll never forget

when i saw that using the corner of the pizza box just wash the fucking plates in the sink i understand using the corner of the the pizza box every once in a while you know not not maybe not because the dishes are super dirty but you know just out of like laziness like you don't want to get up and grab a plate just you know um but yeah you wash your dishes guys come on yeah but anyways you know that's a very heinous move of his you know yeah it's it's you know whatever it's college college boys partying being a bunch of drunk bastards it happens okay but so back to bill and ted's bogus journey so you you stop taking notes after that i have a i don't i don't take the most diligent notes but i have some notes after that so okay

after that moves on um so bit so robot bill and ted show up right they kill regular bill and ted i forgot that they actually killed them and threw them off a cliff. Yeah, threw them off a cliff. So that's how they end up. It was just like the Star Trek movie that they were watching. Did you notice that? Yeah, it's the exact same movie. It was the exact same scene as, yeah, the cliff that William Shatner was on.

I love that they had that in the movie. Brandon. Okay, I'm going to move past that. That's a perfect Shatner in Star Trek. That was one of your worst impressions.

Whatever. Whatever. But so they get thrown off and they're in uh purgatory essentially yeah um and death shows up now this is my favorite part yeah he shows up and they're and so bill and ted are like we need to get we need to get back alive we need to go back to the land of the living so we can say non-heinous dudes are trying to ruin their lives yeah and they're trying to hurt the babes they got to save the babes so they make a deal with death and they're like we'll play you at a game if we win we get to be alive again if you win we're here

forever uh well because death mentions that like you can you can challenge me in a game yes he brings it up he says you can challenge me in a game yes he brings out he says you can challenge me in a game he lays out the stipulations and then he mentions nobody's ever won you know yeah um so then uh well then they then they like run away from him for a sec right and that's when you yeah they give him a wedgie they give him a melvin not a wedgie but they give him a Melvin, not a wedgie, but they give them a Melvin and then they run away and they're like running. They run back to San Dimas and that's when the robots are trashing the apartment. They see that or whatever. Yeah, and then they try to do the exorcist, right, where they like go to Missy's.

Missy has – apparently she has these seances a lot. Yeah, she has these seances a lot. Yeah. She has some regulars. But so they go in there and they try to contact Missy through the seance to help them, and she sends them to hell using her witch book. But I loved that at the beginning of the seance, it goes around the table and everybody names a spirit they want to contact, right? Yeah. everybody's uh everybody names this a spirit they want to contact right yeah and people are throwing out like i forget who everybody threw out but it was like gandhi and a whole bunch of stuff but did you see who missy who missy wanted to contact ty cobb why the fuck does she want to contact ty cobb she's you know she's just a massive baseball fan is she trying to bang ty cobb i think that's what it is

i think i dude she okay so she has a thing for dads and so like i bet i bet ted's dad is a big baseball guy and so talks a lot about ty cobb so now she's got like a ty cobb thing yeah she's got a crush on crush on the cob dude j Christ. Don't say it like that. She's crushing some cob. No, she's got a crush on the cob. Oh, okay. Yeah. She's trying to crush the cob by contacting the chaos.

She's got a crush on the cob so she can crush the cob. Exactly. Jesus. All right. Hold on. I got to quit talking. But so she interprets their contacting her as like evil spirits so she sends them to hell yeah which is the worst worst portrayal of hell i think i've ever seen in a movie yeah it's like there's special huge rocks

attached to a chains as they're slowly creeping towards the devil but there's like weird metal animals that they come through that they like jump on to avoid but then they don't avoid it because they they find their own personal hells in there which is the easter bunny and the grandma going to visit his grandma. And then the, the, the military guy, the military guy too. Okay. Hold on. That is another one of my favorite parts when they're like, hold on, I got to find it. Cause I did write this down where they were,

when they're talking to the, to the army guy and like, they're trying to like say like, sir, he's like. He's like, no way, sir. Yes, sir, dude. What? Yes, dude, sir. Yes, sir, sir, dude. That cracked me up. That's like when Ted possesses his dad and he's like, okay dudes oh i mean fellow policemen my son ted theodore long and his friend bill s preston and his most and his most excellent friend

most excellent have been murdered and replaced by evil robots from the future i totally passed my dad they do the air guitar he's like he's like they we gotta stop them so they don't hurt the babes i mean princesses can't hurt the babes dude can't hurt the babes, dude. Can't hurt the babes. It is very charming that throughout – Catch you later, cop dudes. Yeah, that's it. That's like also from Dazed and Confused when the one guy is like, catch you later. And he's like, dude, why did you have to say that?

You always sound like a dork. Catch you later, catch you later. I've had to like stop myself from like talking like this now because it's going to – like with buddy games, it's going to seep into my – Listen, I'm totally going to be catching everyone later. Catch you later. Yeah. You got to throw – you got to do the whole thing though. You got to do catch you later, some descriptor, and then dude.

I was just going to say like I got to – Like with Kelly, it would be like catch you later, some descriptor, and then dude. I was just going to say. Like with Kelly, it would be like catch you later, lover dude. Catch you later, puppy dudes. There you go. Believe in the dogs. As you're leaving a diner, catch you later, diner dudes. See? There you go. Now you got it.

That's what I'm going to do now. Check you later, barmaid dudes oh gosh oh but so so they make it through their their own personal hells right you make it through there and then that's when death catches up to them and we play the games we challenge them we're like this is the best part the best part is when they play death in the games it's the best part of the movie hands down does death let them choose the game or does he choose it i forget i think they choose the games yeah and then that's what i thought yeah like yeah they challenge death to the game and of course what's the first game you're

going to challenge just you heath it's's hands down, easy answer, Battleship. Exactly. That's exactly it. Obviously. I feel like everyone has Battleship growing up, right? Like every household has Battleship. Even Death has Battleship. But so they destroy Death at Battleship.

And he becomes a very sore loser. They sunk his Battleship, and he becomes a very sore loser. They sunk his Battleship. Yeah, and he becomes a very sore loser, and he's like two out of three. Okay, guys? Two out of three. I love that wrinkle. So then they pick the next game. What's the next game you would pick, Heath?

Well, I don't know about you, but if I'm really trying to get on's uh better side and outwit him i'm gonna pick clue exactly obviously so they pick clue we're playing clue and they again they destroy they destroy death yeah well he says colonel mustard but we all know it was professor plum yeah and then i love how death goes he goes it was colonel mustard he does the whole thing and they're like no no, no, no. It was Professor Plum. And Death goes, yeah, that's what I said. Yeah.

That's what I said. Best out of five. Yeah. So then he, yeah. Sore loser. Best out of five. Next game, Heath. Electric football.

Of course. And let's, let's unpack that for just a half a second because if the listeners have never done any – like the electric games, the same with like the hockey one. Remember the magnetic hockey one where you could slide them and like try to shoot it to like the other people? Those games fucking suck. For all the youngins, all the kids that are listening. All the youths. Because I know we're real popular with the with these these days yeah um electric really really hitting the tween market out of the park

electric football is it's a giant metal like football field right um with with little um they're not they're like plastic but they have magnet a magnet at the bottom of them you know football um what figures figures right yeah little figures and then what you do is they have the magnets on them so you put them on the metal thing and then you plug the metal football uh thing into the outlet you turn it on and it starts vibrating and that makes the the football figures move with the magnets that's electric football it's impossible it's impossible to play and even more impossible to win yeah it's the the fact that they actually claim to did you notice that they claim to have won but yet all they showed was death's guy just spinning in circles over and over again it's is like just remind remembering to be like because that's like

you're a kid and you that's the only thing you just put in a fucking circle you're a kid and you're super excited about your new electric football game and so you plug that son of a bitch in and you expect it to be like on the commercials and then they just start doing nothing on the commercials yeah and they just start doing nothing and you're like you've got to be shitting me this is one of my christmas presents like and i'm not even gonna fucking play with this anymore could have gotten three more wwf action figures from hasbro oh goodness or at least a gi joe dude there's this free TV called Tubi, and they have all the old Transformers and G.I. Joes and stuff on it. I've been watching that when I get ready for work in the morning.

It's been awesome. Little G.I. Joe. I have the theme song stuck in my head. A quick message from our friends at Broken Forest Collective. Built on a passion for small batch and handcrafted products, Broken Forest provides high quality casual wear and lifestyle goods that are American made and built to outlast the fast fashion trends.

They also plant a tree in Boulder, Colorado for every product sold. Visit brokenforestco.com and use the codeAKEETERS15 for 15% off your order. Back to Bill and Ted's bogus journey, though. Sorry. Yeah. So electric football, they play electric football. They win. Death, again, pulls best out of seven.

He's like, best out of seven. Let's do this. So then they play Twister. For all the marbles. Yeah. They beat Death after this, and Death finally gives in, and he's like, fine. I'll take you back. We're going back.

Yep. Wait. Did you catch what Bill said to Ted here? And he's like, yo, Ted, don't fear the Reaper. And then they do the electric guitar, and Death's like, I heard that. Yeah. Oh, that's classic i i love when uh right after they beat him and he's like that's like fine i'll take you back keanu goes up to him and he's like uh solid game death dude you really did a great job

especially with your heavy death robes and and then death like freaks out on him. He's like, don't patronize me, okay? Don't patronize me. Oh, man. It's good stuff. So now they're back. They're coming back to the land of the living with death. Death in tow. Yep. Because he's their buddy now.

Because they bested death. So now he's like at their mercy. Yeah. He's in their service now. When death is trying to get through heaven and the dude's like, don't I know you? Yeah. But yeah, so from there they go through heaven, right? Yeah.

This is where they meet Stations, the two Martiansians the creepy little fucking alien guys um and they bring them along because uh was it god was it god that told them or somebody told them that these two was it death that told them yeah death was gonna guide them to like the two of the best scientists in the world that's right okay yeah so yeah death guides them to these martians station um because they are the the two greatest science minds in the world and the reason they want the science minds is because bill and ted's idea on how to beat the robots is to create two more robots but good robots yeah so you got bill and ted of station can i tell you my favorite line for station that i found sure that's ted goes you are most excellent scientist station and then bill goes

yeah plus you got an excellently huge martian butt and then station just goes station that's all that's all he says is station yeah i got an excellently huge martian butt dude they're that those aliens were hard to look at yeah especially especially the butts especially it reminded me of uh the dark crystal some of the characters in the dark crystal right yeah they probably used some of the same animatronics yeah and then the way they walked like it was unsettling and like when they like ran into each other and like that like pile of mush oh that was gross when did they unjoin they never showed showed that. I would like to see how that worked. Oh, man.

I don't know. But yeah, those things are terrifying. But yeah, so their idea is to create good robots. So you have Bill and Ted. You have the good us's, which are the robot clones. And then you have the evil us's, which are Hans' evil clones or evil robots. Okay. Most non-heinous dudes. Yep yep and so we're back on earth we're ready to go the little stations built the robots we're going to battle the bands

climax of the movie here we go heath yeah now one thing i have to ask is before we get to Battle of the Bands, the evil usses, the evil robots, they are kidnapping the babes, the princesses. And then they're going to princesses they are speaking of which i feel like we didn't mention this um and i'm gonna mention it now because i realize people might be confused on who the princesses and the babes are in the first movie they go back in time to medieval england and they these two they meet these two princesses um and they like fall in love or whatever and so the princesses stay in the future with them that's where the princesses um and they like fall in love or whatever and so the princesses stay in the future with them that's where the princesses and the babes come from yeah that's what we're doing you know hop on hbo max and give yourself a little yes bill and ted both of them

were on hbo max have a marathon like i did yeah get your bill and ted on right on the afternoon when you're bored you know get a tall cool case of budweiser's though first but so while um while the evil us's are kidnapping the princesses they're telling everybody that they're robots right yeah they show the girls that they're robots they like oh they do the face and the skin and the belly thing where they show the robot innards yeah why why would you tell anybody that you're robots why well they're not super smart and they just you know like the well because the girls too were like what's going on like we're robots babes and then they like pull back their six-pack i love that the robots had six-pack like had like stuff to make six-packs right like they had like inserts yeah uh but like just don't don't tell anybody because then if you don't tell anybody your robots at the end during the climax

you know there could be a whole you know which one's the real ones thing but you ruined it because you told everybody you're fucking robots well but now they know where to look too like it's like all right everyone lift up your shirt let's see but anyway so battle of the bands they they kidnapped the princesses the princesses are hanging from the rafters and they said they're going to kill them at the end of the show by hanging them. Is that what they were going to do? That seems real aggressive. Yeah.

That part, I was like, ooh, that seems aggressive. There's a few things that didn't translate well to modern day. This movie. But I do want to point out. So Battle of the Bands is being broadcast all around San Dimas. And did you see the reporter who was reporting? No. Her name is Kate Axelrod.

Okay. I just wanted to point it out because it's like half of my last name is Kate Axelrod. Okay. I just wanted to point it out. Because it's like half of my last name. I thought it was pretty interesting. Oh. Well. I didn't find that as interesting. And she mentions it's the fourth annual Battle of the Bands.

Just in case you were wondering. Fourth annual. I love that they were just so incredibly bad. But they still got in to Battle of the Bands. Yeah. Because Rufus let them in. got in to battle the bands well yeah because rufus rufus let him in um but they're they're in battle the battle the bands they're playing some legit they got some legit competition you got primus that's a that's a real band by the way primus the the

band that that like uh opens the competition real band um they also had another they they mentioned um at the beginning when uh it's at bill and ted university and he's bringing all these musicians back from the the back from the past he brings back uh the dude from faith no more which i thought was pretty interesting and yeah there's interesting choices of who they who they brought back and And then they had Faith No More posters all around their apartment. Faith No More, very underrated band. Very influential band, Heath. I don't know if you're familiar with Faith No More.

Yeah, I'm not at all. Not even a little bit. I know that he's been knighted, though, because it's Sir something in the credits. Yep. You would know their song Epic if you heard it. I got to, you know, the Peacemaker soundtrack got me into Hairband recently, too. I've been jamming a lot of Hanoi Rocks. They're not quite Hairband. So they're mid-80s, mid to late 80s, I think was their heyday.

They are... Essentially, they're responsible for... They're like an alt metal band. I would say, and I feel like most people would say, they are kind of responsible for starting the whole new metal wave. Okay, alright. are kind of responsible for starting the whole new metal wave okay all right so like like bands like limp biscuit uh oh like a huge influence to faith no more um lincoln park would probably say faith no more is a huge influence on them remember that uh lincoln park jay-z duet album do you remember that that was something else i mean it had it had that one song was awesome that was that was during the same time

that that was like when everybody was doing collabs right didn't know it's like do the do the wasn't that around the same time yeah it's like 2001 2002 i was in high school yeah everybody was just collabing dude yeah uh but that was uh that was something i remember when that came out it was like wait lincoln park and jay-z whoa but anyway bill and tibbs bogus to burn the cd yeah i'm sorry yeah we're we're gonna wrap this up here so the good the good the good robots destroy the evil robots okay and the good robots look like the craziest fucking robots i've ever seen because they go they go to like a weird electronic store and buy a whole bunch of random shit so like the robots are made of like hair dryers and toaster

like his shin is a toaster oh so yeah they're real weird looking um yeah but so the the good robots beat the evil robots that problem solved but then hans shows up right hans is here to destroy the world yeah um but he again this is where the trope comes in, where they're just like, instead of like having an actual battle, like a normal fucking movie, they just go, well, I'm just going to go back in time and do this so that I can do that. And then there's a whole back and forth where Hans does the same thing. He's like, well, I'm just going to go back in time and do this. I fucking loved it it was fantastic uh but hold on long story short they win yeah they be home yeah and then hans melvin yep hans hans gets melvin and they crush battle of the bands death is in the band too they crush battle of the bandsands. Death is in the band too. They crush Battle of the Bands because – so as we mentioned, they're terrible at music. Wild Stallions, not a great band.

They go back in time and learn it though, Brandon. No, they go – so they go – so they – so Bill and Ted from the future time travel back to this Battle of the bands and the future ones have learned how to play music and are now good musicians so they come back and then they win the future ones win battle of the bands that's right that's right that's right and uh bill looks like uh zz top yeah bill looks like zz top and then uh keanu has like a weird like jack sparrow pirate goatee going on but so they went back all the bands with their great songs death is in the band the princesses are in the band and so that's what sets off wild stallions being the greatest band ever bringing peace to the to the world um during the credits they're like throwing newspaper headlines at you all the time one of

them is like the wild stallions solve the nuclear crisis or some shit like that there's just a bunch of they bring peace to the world and so that is why everybody worships them in the future did you know that they came out with a new bill and ted two years ago yep bill and ted face faced music yeah yeah i forgot i remember it coming out and thinking they definitely didn't need to make a new one no i still haven't seen it i need to see it yeah i'll have to see it i guess before i leave judgment but i really felt like uh i i since i marathon the first two I feel like I have to watch the third one now. Make it worth it. You're fully invested now.

I'm a Bill and Ted guy now. You know? Yeah. Catch you later, dude. Ex most non-heinous adjustment to your lifestyle party, dude. Yeah. But yeah. All right.

I really don't have too much else for this movie that's it that's how it ends um with the the time travel trope of just going back in time and give her and giving you what you need to win love it fucking love it love it if only life was that easy we'd all we'd all be a little further ahead exactly or butterfly effect we'd be fucking shit up you know yeah butterfly effect we're all just in a nuclear wasteland but you know we will we will end on a much more positive note brandon and i think we can tell all the listeners to be excellent to each other and party on dudes we got to give cake ratings before you start being all weird heath oh yeah i forgot we gotta do our cake ratings i was just kind of i was done talking about the

movie could you tell i was like that's what i that's what i'm not done but we got cakeys or cake ratings nothing cake aroma yeah let's let's get some. Between zero and five, decimals encouraged, what rating would you give Bill and Ted's bogus journey? Oh, I would say. If you want, we can group one and two together, and we can say. No, I think we got to do it standalone. Because one bolsters two's cake rating. Because I was actually going to be a little more harsh on this one. I feel like it's a 1.98 out of cake. Out of five cakes.

1.98. Yeah. I was not like. I just could not. It was good. And it was fun for the nostalgia. But like halfway through, I didn't it was good and it was fun for the nostalgia but like halfway through i didn't really want to watch it anymore interesting interesting okay yeah i just i don't

know i just maybe i was just in a weird mood that i wasn't feeling it but it were the only scene that i like love love love is when they play death in the games i just think that's right um i agree one is way better than two and if we were to grow together it would definitely bolster it yeah it'd be like two point 2.5 cakes if you add one in there yeah i think yeah 2. 2.6, somewhere there for both of them. Yeah. This one on its own, I would probably give like a 2.2. I would – this is on equal footing with Son-in-Law for me where it's like there's some really good like funny bits. The nostalgia factor is there, but it's just not a good movie. Oh, don't compare this to Son-in-Law. Son-in-Law is so much better than this no it's not

that's oh it's a million times better than this the tagline for this i do want to mention is uh hell hath no pizza and i think that's great if you yeah so i i i would not recommend this one honestly uh to watch but i would recommend the first one, Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure. Watch that movie. That's the way better version of this movie. Because, again, like we said, Bill and Ted, the original one, is a parody on time travel movies. So when you get to the second one and, God forbid, the third one when I watch that, it's a parody of a parody. You get lost in the sauce it's yeah it starts to starts to come apart at the seams so exactly but the first one great this one not so much

go just watch the first one call it good yeah then you can watch this one like if you're if you want some background while you're doing something else. Yeah. Or if you're real high on a Saturday, fucking throw it on. Yeah. Just throw it on and just be most excellent party dudes. You know, they're just trying to outwit the Grim Reaper and traverse heaven and hell to return to the land of the living to rescue their babes. Did you call him the Grim Ripper or the Grim Riper? Yeah, the Grim Ripper. Dude, if it was a Green Ripper, the Green Ripper would be hanging out with you on your Saturday watching these movies.

There you go. There you go. That'll be our next uh podcast well our podcast item we'll sell a bong there you go perfect the green the green ripper bong from the cake eaters i love it i mean that's like the big elephant in the room though right like they're crazy stoners but it's the early 90s so they won't say it out loud yeah you can't show them smoking you can't show it you can't say it but it's all just super implied yeah absolutely

yeah you know so just be excellent to each other heath yeah that's that's that's a life motto right there brandon honestly yeah that actually would be a good cake eater shirt be excellent to each other party dudes yeah that's i mean it's it's solid advice solid advice let's you should take that into your job take that into your family gatherings, just take it everywhere you go. Thanks for listening, everyone. Please remember to follow and like us on Instagram at TheCakeEatersPod, on Twitter at TheCakeEaters. Also reach out to us via email, TheCakeEatersPod at gmail.com or visit our website, thecakeeaterspod.com.