The Cake Eaters - 37. D2: The Mighty Ducks - Part 3

Episode Date: August 2, 2022

Heath & Brandon dive into the 1994 classic D2:The Mighty Ducks! Today’s episode goes over minutes 20-30. They discuss why the team needs a tutor at all, whether or not Bombay is attracted to Heath's mom, Wheaties boxes, Charlie's hatred of America, the Junior Goodwill Games tournament format, and Brandon's pitch for a Trinidad & Tobago movie. Then we prepare for the glitz and glam of the Junior Goodwill Games in part 4. Follow us at www.thecakeaterspod.com and on Twitter (@thecakeeaters) and Instagram (@thecakeeaterspod) Email us at [e-mail]

What does possible sound like for your business? It's having to spend to power your scale with no preset spending limit. Redefine possible with Business Platinum. That's the powerful backing of American Express. Terms and conditions apply. Visit amex.ca slash business platinum. It's not worth winning if you can't win. Welcome to the Cake Eaters podcast. My name is Brandon. I've got my co-host Heath with me and we are continuing our dive into D2, The Mighty Ducks. This is part three of our breakdown, which are about 10 minutes of movie time apiece. And so today we're talking about minutes 20 through 29, roughly. We're officially picking up at the 20 minute, 13 second mark

right after Tibbles, our good friend Tibbles, takes a puck to the dome. Yeah, yeah. He takes a fastball ricochet off the crossbar from our boy Felton and just absolutely gets lights out. you call did you call him felton shit like tom felton like like draco malfoy yeah that too and fulton as well yikes all right can i start that over no that no that's the crossover we need he is is uh hot

harry potter and the mighty ducks imagine charlie conway at hogwarts dude would be crushing it wait hold on i think we're on to something could you we should sort the d2 ducks for the golden cakeys of hogwarts houses i feel like that's like a whole episode okay yeah we can definitely do that let's let's put that let's put that on the on the drawing board where we sort all the mighty dex characters into hogwarts houses i think we got some content there okay the real question is where do you think bombay would go bombay's is slytherin for sure yep that's what i was gonna say to you it's hands down he's got the easiest ones he's got real voldemort vibes i don't know about voldemort vibes but he definitely has lucius malfoy vibes

oh or maybe some draco vibes you know that's what he was like really i'm thinking more tom riddle you know oh some tom riddle oh wow geez that's yeah i'm not a real bad guy imagine uh i have to imagine that voldemort was just you know crushing moms back in the day god i just you. As someone who. Has listened to the audio books. More times than I would like to admit. I just.

I don't know if I can agree with you there. Why? Why? I mean like. I mean. I feel like we should. We don't need to get into this. But like.

He was kind of a recluse. Only cared about power. And gaining more knowledge. You know. Didn't have time for those types of shenanigans. Yeah, but he had a bunch of loyal. Whatever. Whatever. I was trying to.

Too busy delving deep. I was trying to break into some sweet Harry Potter sex talk and you're just not having any of it. Yeah. Harry Potter is a pure universe and I am not going to let you. Okay. Like I'm not. I'm just am not going to let you take it. Okay. I'm going to put my foot down. I will always put my foot down for that. Okay.

That's fair. That's fair. That's your one veto for this episode, Heath. My one veto is that, listen, Bombay is definitely a Slytherin, but he's not like Voldemort. He's definitely more Voldemort. He's definitely more like Lucius. Likes the glory. Accidentally joins the dark side because he likes the ride and the power that it gives him.

That's fair. That's fair. Does that mean Charlie's Draco? No, no. I don't know what Charlie. Charlie feels more like Hufflepuff. Yeah, Charlie's a Huffle hufflepuff for sure you know he just has too big of a heart yeah you know and we see it we see it in some of these episodes okay so anyways let's let's get back to the movie let's let's tibbles let's dig in and so and we get our first so yeah i going to cut you off here. Tibbles takes the puck to the dome,

and we get our very first introduction to the new tutor, Miss McKay. Miss Michelle McKay. Michelle McKay, I believe is her full name, correct? Yeah, Michelle McKay. Yes, I believe so. They keep the alliteration going. Yeah, Triple M, as I like to call her. Miss Michelle McKay. Yeah. they keep the they keep the alliteration going yeah triple m as i like to call her miss michelle mckay yeah so anyways michelle is hitting tibbles mr tibbles mr tibbles can you

hear me and then bombay hits tibbles with some smelling salts and before we dig into the movie have you ever had smelling salts before like had that i don't know if i have i have i fucking love smelling salts oh really like it's like because like no matter who gets hit with it like it's always like a whoop reaction you know what i mean like i don't know if i i don't know if i've ever had it you would know if you had it it's a it's a oh really okay it's it it's an experience i've done a lot of weird shit but like i mean i've gotten my bell rung quite a few times but it's you know you just kind of like dust it off yeah i mean they all of the times i've i've done uh they don't really use smelling salts in like practical real life situations at least before the game yeah yeah that's that's that's the times that i've done it you take a little

you take a whip before the game it's never i've i've honestly never seen it used after somebody got knocked out wait didn't they catch an nfl coach doing it on the sideline like an assistant it was a while back oh yeah i mean you there's there's clips of athletes doing it all the time hockey player it's real big with hockey players um but uh but again a lot of the times that i see them do it it's like before the game. It's not. It wakes them up before they hit the ice. Yeah, I've never. I don't think I've ever seen it actually done after somebody got knocked out.

Yeah. I also love Tibbles as he wakes up. Just, you know, cracking wise. I'll have the cheeseburger fries and a chocolate shake please great like that yeah it's i love that order and you know like did you ever dip your fries in the chocolate shake are you one of those guys yeah i i don't when he's frosty come on frosty yeah i do it every once in a while i haven't had a fucking frosty in years, though. That was like the go-to after-pool snack in high school because I had a lot of friends that worked at the Wayne America Dairy Queen. And so we'd go get a little free cup of chocolate ice cream.

And they'd just blast the old fries back in the fryer for us. Okay. That's solid. Yeah, yeah. That was great. Great post-pool snack. But yeah great order yeah great order and so i do want to mention miss michelle mckay is uh played by katherine irby a lot of people will recognize her she's a very famous actress what was what was that noise he's sorry jenkins has allergies and we took we took the dogs on

their first uh their first adventure to the beach did it went fine but like they're not they're not necessarily built for the beach and he has allergies so it was just jenkins uh with a little a little cough i took him to the vet for it that's that's an official veterinarian diagnosis i'm not just making the shit up but it's he just you know he um and just a little bit uh you know allergies here in the pollen in the southeast and we took him to the beach and so there's a little dust hack for you. What's such a weird voice? Yeah. Slapjack has allergies too, though. I found that out a couple weeks ago.

He had like a weird hot spot that flared up. So I had to take him in and they shave it down so it could heal. And they were like, yeah, your dog, he's got severe allergies. So I have to bring him in every six months to get fucking allergy shots yikes jenkins isn't that bad we just gotta you know make sure we vacuum quite a bit wipe the paws down but i just think taking him to the beach for the first time you know a lot of oh yeah flare up for sure yeah yeah so so anyways but anyway back to katherine she's the actress that plays Michelle McKay, the tutor. She was – I don't even – is it still going?

She was on Law & Order Criminal Intent. She was one of the main detectives alongside Vincent D'Onofrio in Criminal Intent. It's hard to tell because those Law & Order shows morph into so many different pathways. I feel like it's hard to tell if like those law and order shows morph into so many different like pathways. I feel like it's hard to tell if it's still going or not. Criminal Intent is not going. It ended in 2011. SVU I feel like is still going. Or like the regular one.

Just like the regular one, Law and Order. The regular one and the SVU one are for sure still going. Criminal Intent though, not going. But so she played Alexander Eames, Detective Eames in Law and Order Criminal long order criminal intent she played that she was on that show for like 10 years yeah i didn't care much for her counterpart in that show vincent d'onofrio you know like vincent d'onofrio no i just he's fine it's just sometimes in the show i just i just didn't care for it oh yeah he was like the he was like the narcissist, egotistical guy.

So I could see how you weren't like the character. Yeah, I got you. Yeah. Yeah. You know, just wasn't for me, Brandon. Vincent D'Onofrio, though, is a fantastic actor. So, well, yeah. But that is a good call out, though.

I totally forgot that she was in that show. Yep. Mm-hmm. But so forgot that she was in that show. Yep. But so she. Miss McKay. But so she wakes up. We get Tibbles up. And then she introduces. You see a little gleam in Bombay's eye.

Right. Yep. She introduces herself to Bombay. You get a little you know. A little looky look right there. My favorite part is. She introduces herself as the tutor. And all the kids. Not fans of this right away did you hear what did you hear like who says i need a tutor yeah did you hear what portman said i don't need no school exactly what

fuck fucking portman man i love portman so much he just he does a great job of this character portrayal yes and he's and i love still rocking the sleeveless hockey sweater which is just such a fucking power move i love that so much yeah yeah and and the bandana of course and then goldberg you know is just trying to fast talk and now miss mckay we're america's team here shouldn't we just be concentrating on hockey may i suggest optional attendance he's got a point you know i'm with goldberg on this i i mean it's it's it's the middle of summer anyway what are we what are we fucking tutoring for they're gonna go back to school that is exactly what i was gonna say i was like this the thing that kind of didn't make sense was that it's the summer and so they

don't really need to have a tutor or be in school and they don't just go play hockey and just have an extra chaperone and they don't show her teaching them anything yeah like it just maybe or maybe like her character is like a publicist maybe makes a little more sense that works for hendrix instead of i don't know it just maybe i i would have went like i would have went trainer route you know she's a trainer she's there for for injuries and stuff that's what i would have went for you mean like the iceland team because that actually makes sense yeah yeah yeah because yeah she's a trainer right she is the trainer yeah yeah yeah she's a trainer yeah maria see iceland's got it figured out you know yeah the the wolf's got this ship though

we know that he didn't even know the tutor was coming that's how loose his ship is you know exactly exactly um but uh i i love this too uh where the interaction where she's like well that's not a bad idea and she kind of looks at him and he's like you can call me goldberg um but if they don't attend school with her brandon they can't play not going to be eligible oh yeah she hits them she she hits them with uh well i mean in life everything is optional you know you don't have to come but then you know you're not going to play you know yeah because there are consequences to one's actions i feel like people don't understand that these days definitely not definitely not you know that's why we don't have nice things as a country

i mean we have we have some nice things we got the mighty ducks it's pretty nice i'm just kidding all right anyway so um um but i so miss mckay hits him with that it's not fair and then post miss mckay they're all kind of walking back to the locker room and this is one of my favorite interactions where averman walks up to portman and it's like hey is that a tattoo is it real it's like get away from me did you see what the tattoo what the tattoo was i did not see what the tattoo was i was gonna ask you i i just forgot i was like oh i kept meaning to go back and look at it so it's a uh it's a uh it's a hockey style skull and crossbones so nice so instead of like the

bones the crossbones it's hockey sticks love that and then in the middle is like a i couldn't tell if it was i it looked like a like a you know like a jason style hockey mask but i couldn't 100% tell but it was it was it was a goalie mask of some kind i think it was like a jason style one though but yeah what that's a solid tattoo yeah that's fucking sick dude yeah yeah and that's exactly why you rock the the the cut off sleeves it's because you got that sick fucking tattoo right there especially for a youngster like him you got to show that off and just let everyone know you're coming for blood they're 14 how what so so they mentioned they're teenagers did Did they ever mention the full age range of this? I can't remember if they do.

I don't think so. I don't think they really dig into it. Yeah, so I don't think we know exactly how old Portman is. He could be, you know. Honestly, he could be 45. I think it's good to him being a little bit older, though, because after he says, get away from me, Averman's like, yes, sir.

And he barks at him, and Averman runs away. bit older though because aberman after he says get away from me aberman's like yes sir and he like barks at him and aberman well it doesn't mean that's great that that doesn't mean he's he's older necessarily that's that's portman and his his alpha mentality you know just commands respect from from little little beta aberman yeah yeah just aberman's just there to crack wise and provide a little support on on the rotations at the end. I don't think I've ever been more disgusted with myself than saying that sentence. Although, OK, so hold on. After that interaction, they cut to the ice and it's Miss McKay in Bombay.

And Miss McKay says, well, I'm just here to tutor the kids and provide them with a little adult supervision. So she kind of admits it there, right? Like the tutoring is really not necessary. It feels like a real power trip. Like you don't need to, there's just no need for the tutoring. She's just there for the adult supervision. Yeah. Yep.

She's just there to tag along, you know. Ride the Minnesota Miracle Man coattails yeah i mean i just i don't know i just feel like that i would have liked her more as a publicist because then it ties in a little bit better with the bombay storyline and him kind of getting the ego well it it wouldn't work for her to be the publicist though because a a that's what that's what tibbles is tibbles there for pr oh that's publicist though because a that's what that's what tibbles is tibbles there for pr oh that's true that's true yeah that's a good point and she is the one that helps bombay see the light too yeah the p the pr stuff is what yeah the pr stuff is what you know inflates the ego of bombay so you couldn't have her be responsible for that and

then also wrote like ring him ring him back in you know well that's true well and we see later she's not giving them like real deep lessons they're pretty pretty light and surface level yeah you know they're very light very just keeping the kids busy so they don't don trouble. Because we see Shanann. The other thing I don't get about her just being a tutor is she's in every meeting. And she's in the locker room. Your tutor wouldn't be doing that. Because that's the thing.

If she's giving homework and stuff, they're playing in the Junior Goodwill games. They shouldn't be doing homework. I don't think she does give them homework, though. She gives them a day off, which is nice later on. Anyways, I just have a little beef with that. You're going to play in a tournament. You don't need to do that when you get home. I would understand it if it was a season-long thing and it wasn't in the middle of summer.

But it's – yeah, it's in the middle of summer. We're there for, yeah, two weeks maybe. Maybe. Yeah, like a month. Okay, cool. A month in the summer, big whoop. They have summer break off anyways. These kids are just playing hockey.

Just – man. Anyways. Anyways. Let the boys play. Yeah. Yeah. That's my motto let the boys be boys right isn't that the the 90s hip-hop song by onyx remember that classic i i recognize the melody i don't know if those lyrics are right though oh yeah no they're 100 correct okay okay i

i trust you i trust you yeah i can i i can verify if you want me to but it's no i just this is my childhood i trust you but that's that's my uh that's my motto just let the boys play you know uh i love it um okay so we have that interaction she lets bombay know what's up and then all of a sudden right as she talks about a little adult supervision what happens brandon we get a zamboni how crashing through those boards and i gotta ask you who's paying for that so i is hendrix paying for that i would imagine that they're gonna foot the bill but my question right my question to you is he's so going forward in the series here knowing get into game changers knowing what we know about future bombay and his affinity for

zambonis what do you think is going through his mind during this this scenario here this this this interaction we have where these kids not only destroy the the boards the hockey boards but that zamboni's done so yeah i mean in that moment he's probably going ah shit these fucking kids yeah as as a vintage zamboni enthusiast he is i imagine i imagine is livid livid yeah yeah i mean it's i i like that i thought it was a good combination of characters that were testing out the zamboni where the gas just got away from them and and they went crashing through with gee jesse and fulton yes i do like that it was all old ducks i think yeah i like that it was all ducks because if it was all the new kids it'd be a little you know yeah it would have been too much because like

those old ducks were you know they they liked a few shenanigans they don't have peter and they're fucking to kind of carry the shenanigans banner yeah that's what they were and and so i thought that was that was kind of fun and and like their their reaction to they're like celebrating and giving high fives to each other and then they turn and it's bombay and miss mckay like with just shocked expressions and they're like oh sorry and jesse's like uh we're okay though i love that that's a great line that's a great manipulative line right well we're safe though yeah no harm no foul yeah keep it moving yeah but the it's i i first thing i ask myself is like okay who's footing the bill for this damage you know because that's that's rough that's a lot i met I imagine it's Hendrix. Cause I imagine Hendrix is,

is the one renting the ice time. So, but I mean, would have just, you know, she would have like put my head on a stake outside of the ice rink as a, you know, Hendrix sign of warning to never do anything like that again hendrix can

afford it though they got fucking gobs and gobs of money here i suppose do you think they would have not ratted me out to to mama d because she she would have she would have just been like okay kids this is what happens when you mess around you know oh i don't know if they would have read it uh well it's a well it depends on i i would say i was gonna say it depends on how attracted bombay is to your mom that's gonna be the deciding factor is if he's okay all right okay you know what all right so we we cut from the rink and we cut brand Brandon off before he talks about my mom and Bombay. And we go to the team.

You brought it up, okay? I brought up something completely different and you took it there. You asked if Bombay would rat you out to your mom. And I'm just saying if he was attracted to your mom, yeah, he would rat you out 100%. The worst. Mama D is a saint, Brandon. You got no arguments for me on that. No arguments.

Okay. All right. Anyways, so we cut to the ducks all tied together, and the subtitles tell us that they are groaning and grumbling as they are all in a big circle. Do you like what Dwayne says? This is more crowded than a truckload of goats. How crowded do you think a truckload of goats is? They must really pack them in there. Oh, they pack them in there, dude.

They fucking pack them in. oh they pack them in there dude they fucking pack them for goats man yeah um um the the things people say julie though yeah so the things people say in this fucking huddle because they're all tied together right they're all tied close together and so you get a lot of weird one-liners you get one from julie the cat where she says somebody better watch their hands yeah Yeah, and looking at the crowd around her, it looked like it was either Averman, Portman, or Luis. So Portman had his – Someone was getting fresh hands. Portman had his hands up top, right? Okay.

From what I could tell, he had his hands resting up on people's shoulders. Okay, so we got Aver or luis there then is what yes yeah um hopefully it was it was an accidental you know grazing otherwise we got some issues you're you're tied to you're tied together you're gonna get some stray hands in there depending if especially if you didn't get them up top right away exactly yeah yeah and then but so then so then made that mistake you're stuck okay yeah keep going sorry so then – If you made that mistake, you're stuck. Okay. Yeah, keep going. Sorry. So then Averman hits us with somebody licked him, which – Yeah. Based on that –

The subtitle had us – Connie yelling at Averman again too. Okay. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. She was like – she just yells at Averman for stepping on her. Yeah. So Averman steps on her. But the only person that I think would have been able to lick Averman is Charlie.

I wrote that same thing. It's 100%. And that's for sure. That's for sure a Charlie move. That's a Charlie move. Wait, hold on. Why is that? Just like a, just like nothing says a good.

Just a quick neck like. Nothing says a good. Just a quick neck lick. Yeah. Just a real quick one. Yeah. I don't know if I've ever heard of that before, but yeah, it's just, nothing,

nothing says, I guess it's like in the same line as a wet Willie, you know, it's just a little more to the point. Exactly. Exactly. And maybe that's what he did. Maybe he like,

maybe he just licked his fingers and then, you know, put that on his neck. Yeah. Nothing, nothing wrong with a wet Willie. You know, I just feel like,

especially in the pandemic era that we live in now, that's a, it's a lick to the neck is a dangerous game. That should be the title of your memoir. A lick to the neck is a dangerous game. Oh, man. That's good stuff. Okay.

And then after Averman gets licked, we kind of get everyone sniffing again like we did in the limo for D1. And everyone turns around. Goldberg? Hey, it wasn't me. No.

It was me. Portman, an absolute triumph, claiming that part. I thought that was the funniest shit ever as a kid yeah portman's the fart guy now you know it's the classic it's the it's the classic okie doke you know you think yeah oh man the first time you watch this movie yeah oh yeah you know you you watch d1 you love d1 and then the very first time ever you watch D2 and you're with everyone else, you're like, oh, that old Goldberg, he's going to deny it. And then it's like, oh, wait, hold on.

Hold the phone. Portman coming out of nowhere, coming in hot and just owning it up. I thought that was hilarious. And I love that he's like celebrating it in the middle of everyone. It's just, it's great stuff. Okay. So post fart joke, we have Bombay instructing them. Why in the world they're, they're tied together.

He says, I don't know how I can make this any clearer. You are a team and to win this thing, you have to work as one. Now as one skate and they just fall everywhere yeah so this this training montage they don't actually do any hockey training this is like a game changers training montage yeah let's see it's like it's two seconds it's like a two second practice montage um and then and then at the at the end bombay says you guys are looking like real hockey players now yeah no yeah no we're not no we're no we're not bombay i i have that written down too because like there's some there's some

fun interaction uh like we're like fulton and portman, you know, at first they're, they're not friends. And so Portman says, right. Fulton says left. And, and, you know, they're just, they're just all over the place, but then all of a sudden they're skating together. Harmonize gives a good, you know, they give a good charge. And then he says something weird to Charlie on the subtitles. We can skip over that but i was like what the fuck did he just say to charlie and so did i on wood or knock wood charlie

or something it was weird knock wood i don't remember yeah he says that is in the subtitles oh yeah i just replayed it yeah i just say it says knock wood charley yeah see what the fuck does that mean i don't know disney just doesn't it never keep it keep it going movies yeah well because he doesn't i he definitely doesn't say it um like that that him saying it is cut out um and so i think they just left it in the subtitles for some reason i don't know i definitely didn't hear him say that that's weird i don't know so anyways um yeah so it's like a like a maybe it's like a an old phrase you know it's like keep it going knock wood keep on like hop along like hop along gretzky that very very current reference that they made exactly exactly so anyways um after that bombay realizes man they're working together so well that it's time to have a little fun and let's get cowboy duane going you guys that's where he said you guys are starting to look like hockey players

i'm proud of you team i was like okay one scrimmage then he ties the team together and they skate as one cool all set ready to go against the world competition worked hard today it's like you worked hard today but hockey should be fun they do any like show them doing any drills um but anyways i this was a great scene too i always love this i love the fucking duane roundup scene um it's fantastic round me up some stray cattle there my pleasure and then like how they all go whoa and then like the music leads into it oh dude the the song is the i know we've talked about how good the soundtrack is, but this is one of those examples. The song just fucking slaps, dude.

It's Let's Work Together, which is like an old – it was like late 60s, I want to say, like blues song. Nice. I loved it. And then it's been covered you know a hundred million times and so the the version that they use in mighty ducks is by dwight yokum but he's like a country country singer from the 90s um he's in a he's in a bunch of he's in a bunch of movies too he's an actor um but yeah so that that's that's the version they use is his is and it's a it's a great fucking song and very fitting heath because you know what they need to work together yeah that's that's a that's a fact jack but yeah the the fucking cattle roundup seems fantastic though and uh the music fits perfectly

we gotta call out though the averman and charlie like i know they were just trying to like get a good shot but they just gave terrible effort you know it just they didn i know they were just trying to like get a good shot but they just gave terrible effort you know it just they didn't move they were just skating backwards and cowboy nobody hit him with the rope no i mean he he he ropes uh julie the cat within like 0.5 seconds she's done yeah nobody's uh i imagine a good doll i am that gives a good oh gives a good dollar Guy's the best one at this game 100% Yeah Even in Because they do this

The same game in D3 And Guy's the best one in that scene as well Guy was born for this He's the only one He's probably the only one Who's come across a cattle in his life You know And then you got I liked Did you like tibble's dance move in the stands

i thought that was great unbelievably bad especially with his classic move with his stupid leather jacket and his face his weird facial expression he made yeah and he's like sitting right next to the tutor yeah i miss mckay just making her as uncomfortable as possible yeah i don't know why that always cracked me up but like the stupid face and the shitty dance move was like god that guy's such a clown that just always always stood that moment always stood out to me um yeah and then we start line dancing oh like i want to say and and they were actually line dancing, and that looked like it was probably hard, but they're getting down.

That was really fun. Kenny Wu was throwing down on that dancing. I imagine line dancing in ice skates, not ideal. Never done it before, but I imagine it's not the best. Yeah. I like how they ended it with bombay just laughing you know being an old so-and-so well yeah he does the he does the the move that i do all the time where you kind of give half effort of dancing and then once you realize

everybody's looking and laughing at you you just go never mind guys okay that's just just just josh and you kids yeah i was joking i was joking oh man so that was that was a great scene though i love i love that scene it's it that one definitely translated well currently because it's oh still holds up so yeah yeah that line dancing that that could not have been easy but anyway so line dancing, we get a tada from Mr. Tibbles. And what do we have, Brandon? Is this Wheaties? Yeah, it's a big Wheaties box.

Hold on. I before we dig into the Wheaties box and just Wheaties in general, I have a beef with the picture that they used for the Wheaties box like why did they have them in their like weird warm-up gear you don't even know what that is you don't even know who those kids are why wouldn't you have them in their little like for helmetless hockey pads first of all Heath everybody knows who these kids are okay they're the team USA for the junior goodwill games okay Okay, Heath? Okay. Yeah. Okay. It's like throwing a picture of Michael Jordan in, like, warm-up gear on the box.

Everybody still knows it's Michael Jordan. Yeah, that's Michael Jordan. No one knows who these guys are. And this is the Minnesota fucking Miracle Man, Heath. All right. He's not the Colorado Miracle Man, you know? he's not the he's not the colorado miracle man you know he's not the west virginia miracle man you know what he is now though he's that he's coaching team usa he's an american hero that's yeah because i'm i'm give him up give

him the purple heart mississippi give him the purple hearts yeah geez and you're not gonna win this with me brandon that they're in their weird warm-up rollerblade gear instead of their hockey unis that was a bad move by tibbles i'm just saying bombay is an american hero you know i'm not good i love some gordon bomb stop i'm not blaming bombay i'm blaming stop stop supporting the the troops start supporting bombay that's my motion that's good oh my god okay so and we're gonna we're gonna move on from that um because after he i'm just they should have had their hockey unis on that's he did yeah yeah no justice and you don't need the you don't need the whole team the whole team on there's not enough real estate on a weedy's box to put a whole team on there you know exactly real estate on a Wheaties box to put a whole team on

there you know exactly like you get your you get like your five folks that are like you're just put Bombay on there just put Bombay no you still gotta you gotta have some hockey kids around them just grab Bombay with like a couple in front and like three in the front and two next to him like do the Bash Brothers next to him you you know, and then do like Kenny Wu. They're not the Bash brothers yet, though. That's the problem. This is before the tournament. You know, you don't know who the standouts are going to be.

Well, that's just what you do. You do the Bash brothers next to Bombay, and then you do like three people. They weren't the Bash brothers yet. They still aren't getting along 100% yet, Heath. It doesn't matter. It's about aesthetics. You got the two tall guys that are going to look good next to Bombay, looking mean, looking tough. One of them doesn't even look like they should be in the Junior Goodwill

games, though. Heath, he looks 45 years old. Exactly. That's intimidation. That's a quick way to get a freaking birth certificate check, and then he gets kicked out of the tournament. And he's fine. He'll pass.

With flying colors, because we're Team USA, and we follow the rules, Brandon. So anyways, after it gets unveiled, though, after it gets unveiled, Dwayne hits us with a, hey that hey y'all that's us and then fulton's like duh what do you know i always thought that was funny too so but so i do want to talk about weedies for a little bit though because we we talked about this off uh off air uh briefly is i don't think this scene i don't think holds up because i don't think a i'm not a hundred percent sure they they still make Wheaties i'm i assume they do and b i

highly doubt are they still putting athletes on the cover is that still that's not still a thing is it i have no idea i know when i was growing up you didn't what were you gonna say oh i was just saying i know nothing about wheaties because like the only way you can eat wheaties is if you put a whole bunch of sugar on it and if that's a terrible cereal just eat frosted flakes you know what i mean like why would you eat wheaties when you can just have frosted plates and it's the same thing. Because it's the breakfast of champions. Breakfast of champions. I mean, I get it, but it's just, you know, it's that kind of cereal has

just died out. We want sugar filled cereals. I don't think kids, I don't think kids or even like people that are just under our age group. Yeah. So like Gen Z's i i don't think gen z's know what we are i would be surprised if they did um but that used to mean something to be

on a weenie's box well like when i was growing up that was like a fucking that was a big deal it's like winning an academy award like you're on the fucking yeah it was like it was like a stamp of honor as an athlete to grace it. That was like when you knew you made it was when you hit the cover of the Wheaties box. Or like the Olympians that would really crush it and win a whole bunch of gold medals. Like getting that Wheaties box was kind of like the next level. Yeah, but I would be shocked if they're still doing that. Well, no. Yeah, but I would be shocked if they're still doing that. So –

Well, no, I mean – And then I mentioned – because when I texted you – You could list 10 better cereals than Wheaties off the end. Oh, Wheaties, it's terrible. But it's the breakfast of champions. It's the breakfast of champions. But I mentioned – because I tried – I texted you about Wheaties and my iPhone autocorrected Wheaties to Wheat Ice. And so that shows how far the brand of Wheaties has fallen is that it gets autocorrected.

Because autocorrect will capitalize and autocorrect celebrity names but yet cannot identify Wheaties. And it autocorrected Wheat ones right on back. correct celebrity names but yet cannot identify wheaties and it kato corrected wheat ones uh right on back so uh yeah we how the mighty have fallen yeah it's a shame now it's now it's the breakfast of the elderly i guess yeah yeah next time i go to the grocery you know next time i go to the grocery grocery store i'm gonna see if they even still have it i i can't even remember the last time i saw a wheaties box it's been do you still go to the grocery store i only instacart these days i'm a i'm a real diva i go to the grocery store mainly because i'm not i'm not a uh i'm not a planner grocery store i'm more of a uh i wing it you know i shop by feel rather than – I shop with my heart, Heath. Well, you can still – it's a different type.

It's like shopping online. I got to see it in person. I got to feel it. I got to touch it. I got to lick it. I got to do all that stuff. Okay. So I typed in Wheaties into my Instacart app, Brandon,

and like 50 things popped up. I actually had to type in the full word, but there is a Wheaties that you can buy. It is available in Savannah, Georgia, and LeBron James is currently on the cover in that Lakers uniform because they had such a good season this last year that makes sense well if it's on instacart it's probably it's probably an old i doubt they're keeping the picture up to date you know that's like an old well instacart needs to get their shit together

then but okay wheaties for the taste of the cereal you're buying it for the cover of the box. Exactly. Especially if LeBron's on it. You know? Okay, here. We're going Wheaties.com. Okay. Oh, so they have a... Oh, shoot.

Dude. They're celebrating 100 years of Wheaties this year. Man. Still going strong. But this is, so they have, they have a,

on their website, they got a bunch of like special edition. Like they got Mike, they got a Michael Jordan box. They're selling. They got Muhammad Ali up in here. Nice. They have a whole,

they have a whole Jordan section on their website. Nice. I like that. Do you think Michael Jordan owns part of part of wheaties i bet he does i mean he endorsed that he was like their endorser for a minute yeah he's a michael jordan's a fucking sellout jeez louise you know who my favorite sellout is now is shack and he just he doesn't give a shit man like he just owns well papa john's if you own if you if you own it you're not a you're not a sellout you know because you're no okay you own it so i'm i'm okay with you like

like like i'm good with jordan brand because he's he's he's owned he's an owner in that you know he's involved in it but i love what shack did with his shoes too with walmart genius oh that's the best shack's shoes are the are the best i mean yeah that that's my one complaint about jordan the jordan brand it's like i get i get you're trying to make money and fucking capitalism and shit but when uh nobody can actually afford to wear your shoes on a basketball court you're doing something wrong yeah that's what yeah shack shoes are way better they're in walmart they're like 30 bucks 30 bucks a pop fucking that's what yeah shack shoes are way better they're in walmart they're like 30 bucks 30 bucks a pop fucking that's exactly what comfortable too yeah shacks yeah shacks the best yeah i love i think he's great i had i had like he came out when i like his rookie year was what like 93 or

something like that and i had all it was earlier than that. I think it was like 91, maybe even 89. No, no, no, no, no, no. It was 92 or it might have been 92. I don't know. Let's go to the tape here. Yeah, that's what I'm doing right now too. Drafted 1992. Okay, that's what I thought. Because 93 is like Larry Johnson and those guys.

I know this stuff because I have rookie cards. Well, I mean, you said the wrong number at first. Well, I said 92 afterwards. But anyways, they had a whole bunch of just like Shaq toys that were super cool. And I had them all. Like I thought he was just the most badass dude ever. And he was huge and super nimble. I loved Shaq.

Especially Shaq and Penny. Orlando Magic Shaq. super nimble i loved shack so uh especially shack and penny orlando magic shack shack in those old school magic pinstripe unis was awesome so okay anyways should we get back to the movie uh but do you want to know who the the current cover athlete for weedies is right now though 100 russell wilson oh well i mean it's been a minute and he's and he's and he's not even wearing um uh a broncos jersey or a seahawks jersey he's wearing just like a like a warm-up like a perform like a workout t-shirt of that has his logo on it. Talk about a fucking sellout. Yeah.

I don't like that, Wheaties. You can do better. I probably shouldn't be calling everybody sellouts. You need to be nice to people. Especially considering I am the biggest sellout of all. Yeah. It would take

half of what it would take for them for you to sell out. Not even, dude. Not even. That's not even. Okay. I could be had for real cheap. Post Tibbles talking about the Wheaties box. Did you hear him say it it's a weedies box today

tomorrow it's video games action figures lunch boxes who is buying a team usa junior goodwill games hockey toy unless maybe like dollar store like I will. So I will say that they sold millions upon millions of Mighty Ducks action figures. Well, that makes sense because it's the Mighty Ducks, but no one's buying a Team USA Junior Goodwill game action figure. No, but I mean, he was right about the Ducks, you know? Well, that's different, Brandon. Yeah, obviously. But these are the Ducks, are they not? Okay, so it's – I don't even know how to tell you that it's different.

Like would you – Well, so that brings me to my next point though heath okay the the fact that it is different but charlie does not charlie doesn't understand this this scene i was i thought this was weird how he was like stuck on the uniforms it's like this this scene drove me crazy um because because the way they have it like framed is like he's like they frame it like charlie's the good guy he's asking the right framed is like he's like – they frame it like Charlie's the good guy. He's asking the right questions. But what he's asking is he's like, I don't want to play for Team USA.

I want to play for the Ducks. Can't we be the Team USA Ducks? And like the – No, you can't. The gall to be like – the gall to be like, I don't want us to have team usa on our jerseys even though we are team usa let's put my my fucking peewee hockey team's name on this you know i agree fuck america let's go ducks like couldn't we be the USA Ducks? No, you stupid ass.

My favorite. I guess they're the Iceland Vikings. They do say that. Yeah, they say that later. So they could have been Team USA Ducks. But my favorite thing is he goes, can we be the USA Ducks? And Bombay says something like, no's it's it's like it's business or something or whatever and then uh and then charlie goes can we at least keep our colors

like it's red white and blue man yeah what are you fucking talking about charlie and it gets super convoluted there too because he's like that's nice coach but we're ducks this stuff has hendrix all over it like yeah they're so you're paying for everything that you're doing like what the fact that he didn't understand any of that stuff like bombay just needed to do a better job of being like hey man they're sponsoring us um we're not it's america we're not the ducks like yeah see that's where they're trying to paint bombay in like oh he's already getting a bad attitude light but they did it in such a weird way yeah well yeah because it cuts to it cuts to miss mckay and she like gives bombay the dirtiest look ever so what yeah she's like looking concerned yeah he's he's not wrong

yeah yeah i i agree like yeah he should have explained it better though like that's the thing like if well i mean it's it's bombay we're not explaining anything he's we're we're we're hiding our feelings we're shrouding ourselves in mystery that's the bombay magic he's no coach orion am i right exactly preaching to the choir i i thought i i thought that i thought that would surprise you a little bit oh i can't wait for this because that's i can't i can't wait for d3 i know it's the the least of all the movies but but the one that speaks most to your heart so at least give it it's time I fucking love Coach O'Ryan

I love I honestly I love I would have handled this better though I can say that I love every single other coach more than I love Bombay honestly I love Coach O'Reilly although Coach O'Reilly I love out of like I don't know Coach O'Reilly. Although Coach O'Reilly I love out of like – Coach O'Reilly is for sure the mad guy.

It's not O'Reilly. It's just Riley, by the way. That's true. My bad. Coach Riley. That's my Irish heritage. I just always want to throw an O in there. Yeah.

He doesn't own the pub down over – I understand Coach Riley is a terrible person and a terrible coach but i love him you know i still love him well he still at least knows hockey and stuff right yeah but like coach orion fantastic that's the other thing that says it's oh coach orion coach riley you know there's too many o's and r's and it's confusing but wait just wait till we get just wait until i think it's the next episode right is when when when we get introduced to fucking wolf the dentist stanson absolutely oh i can't wait i fucking love this yes hold all of that we have one more episode to wait because

for now post miss mckay looking concerned we cut to our very first sampling of her tutorship of canoes. Can I point something out, Heath? Yeah, absolutely. Point away. There's even more canoes in this scene. Just when you thought we were done with the canoes, there's more canoes. It's a very popular activity to rent out a canoe for the day on those little water things. It's like the woodlands, Texas.

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for 15% off your order. I love that too. So anyways, we've got Miss mckay first tutoring lesson ancient greece the beginning of western civilization see the greek the uh we'll see and then she didn't have professional sports or yeah boxes see and competed for another reason brandon well let's see this is my issue with her her her teaching right here she's not she's not she's she's pushing propaganda here is what she's doing she saw she saw the interaction between uh charlie and bombay and she was like you know what i'm gonna do i'm gonna fucking dig in here and make this this divide even bigger with some of this fucking nonsense yep well do you

know what these athletes competed for in ancient greece brandon i assume they're competing for the same thing that these fucking idiot kids are heath and i would i do love that line though i love fucking fucking goldberg someone someone yelled at him yeah you wish goldberg that was connie connie yells that was it yeah connie is always so hard on averman and goldberg i love it she's got she's got the one liners dude yeah yeah yeah those one liners those zings uh and they i don't know what it is about like the way that charlie raises his hand and then says pride well it's because it's because every everybody else everybody else is talking because there's only there's what fucking 15 of them there yeah

they're cracking wise just chilling out they're talking in a normal like group setting and then charlie being the fucking hufflepuff he is raises his hand and waits patiently for him to get called. Grow up, Charlie. Just shout into the crowd like everybody else does. Come on. My favorite is where she's like, yes, the various city-states waved their flags and wore their home colors proudly. And Fulton is like, yes, the various city-states waved their flags and wore their home colors proudly. And Fulton is like, did America always dominate?

Do you hear what – so Fulton says that the vast majority of the kids scoff at him like you're an idiot. Did you hear what Portman says, though? That's a good question. I fucking love that. Oh, that's where that friendship bond starts that's that that fast brother bond dude he's gonna stick up for his buddy oh my god i just i love that too i thought that was i thought that was absolutely great and then i thought that she had to explain it to him too no america wasn't around oh wait hold on did she did you like how she compared

america back then to a teenager yeah yeah oh you know just a little awkward still forming its own identity america's like us yeah you bet and it at times but on the verge of greatness. Yeah, and it still is. Still a teenager. And did you see Kenny and Banks were sitting together? What did you think about that? I thought that was just an interesting scene, Charlie telling everyone to play for pride. Yeah, which, I mean, that's what they're already doing. They're a little hypocritical of him.

They're not getting paid for this. Play the usa ducks well he wants to he wants to wave his own city state flag which is the duck flag he doesn't give a you know he doesn't give a shit about america yeah just a usurper you know get him benedict arnold charlie conway after the after the grease scene and and we see miss mckay teaching we have bombay in the golf cart and this was another one of my favorite scenes as a kid yeah that's a great scene too the i always wanted to to do this as a coach like ride the golf cart in front of them while they're all doing work you know yeah yeah and doing like the the little army chant right yeah the army chain is so fucking ridiculous yeah i thought that i don't know what i've been told team usa is gonna win the gold yeah listen up and listen good we're all headed

for hollywood classic and then when they bring them on down, you know, one, two, three, four. Classic stuff, man. Yeah, that's, man, sound off, Brandon. I love that. And they're rollerblading down the mountain. Dude, yeah. Oh, man, that was cool. Where was that at?

Do we know? Did it say? They're still in Minnesota. I don't know. Okay, that's what I cool. Where was that at? Do we know? Did it say? They're still in Minnesota. I don't know. Okay, that's what I thought. Because the plane touches down in Hollywood next. They flew the new Ducks to Minnesota. That's where they've been having the practices and the tutoring sessions.

Now they're flying to LA for the for the goodwill games yeah i just wasn't sure if like we knew like that was like in a that was like an outskirts of minneapolis type of thing or maybe they took a training facility in the country now i mean i imagine they just went out to the you know because i mean many i i imagine you could get to those like vast woods outside of Minneapolis real quick. Especially in 94. Yeah. Before, there was a lot of... I would imagine it's very similar to Denver, where you're on a quick 25-minute drive,

and you're in a hike like that. Yeah. Well, there you go. Yeah, so we're flying to the Goodwill Games now. The Junior Goodwill Games in good old L.A. I feel like there's a million movies that use that exact same plane touching down. I think Home Alone used it for sure. I bet.

I'm like 90% sure that's the same plane touching down. If they're reusing and not altering the newspaper articles, they're probably doing it with the planes too. Yeah. Well, Disney is notorious for that. Have you seen the things on Instagram and TikTok where it's like the Jungle Book and the Sorcerer's Stone kids? And Christopher Robin from the old Winnie the Pooh?

They all have the exact yeah people on the exact same motions well yeah well that's because like that was that was that's the animation style and like back then that that shit fucking took you know hours to do a half a second of animation so if you've already got the template why not yeah no it's just it's fascinating work smarter not harder he's you know i'm not knocking it i'm just saying it happened and it's fun to see the different movies like between jungle book and you know what i mean i hear you i hear you yeah i got so anyways so we touched down. We've got our, our, uh, announcer, our radio announcer who got the boy.

What was his name? Chet. Chet. What do we name him? Chet. Uh, Chet Hanson. Yeah.

Chet Hanson with an O N E N E N. Sorry. Yeah. Chet Hanson. Yep. And double N at the, at the, in the middle,

double N in the middle. Yeah. So Hanson. Yeah, so Hansen. But anyway, so we welcome to Sunny Washington. Speaking of which, we haven't seen Jan in a bit. Jan's gone AWOL. Well, Jan is – We haven't seen him since the duck call, right? Yeah, well, he's probably getting the shot.

Like it's probably that time of the year where he starts to get the shop all closed up for the summer season, gets his inventory orders in, you know, gets the books all situated. Oh, he's not closing up just yet. You got to have the last big summer, you know, clearance, and then you close up. Yeah. Okay. Well, whatever. He's doing that then. Summer blowout sale exactly at hon

hans's hockey shop yeah how do you think how do you think he feels how do you think he feels that the hockey shop is named after hans i mean i feel like jan is not someone who's going to need the credit or, you know, he's in the background. Just like getting Bombay that job. He doesn't need any thanks from Gordon. He just needs him to take the job and do well. Do you think Hans started the hockey shop and Jan just tagged along after the fact? Or do you think it was like a joint 50, 50 partnership and homes took all the credit with the name?

No, I think Han started it and then was like, Hey man, you should come over here and come do this hockey shop biz with me. I need, I need an extra pair of hands that I trust. Come move out to Minnesota. You know,

we'll get you all set up. You can be my number two. We got this. Yep. Assistant to the regional manager. Okay. Well, now he's fully in charge with Hans back in the motherland or the homeland.

Now he's just assistant regional manager. Motherland always sounds weird. Hockey announcer and Jan both got promotions this summer wow things are things are going well in minneapolis dude the success ripple of the minnesota miracle man is far and wide it's just hey you know i would love to be in bombay's wake there you know get some great gear i get a lot of success i don't know about you but i would consider myself a part of the Bombay coaching tree. Wow, okay. Actually, I shouldn't say if.

When I decide to become a hockey coach, I'm going to describe myself as part of the Bombay coaching tree. Okay, nice. Okay, sounds good. Which, in effect, makes me part of the Coach Riley coaching tree. So, you know, it's all – we're all connected. We're all connected. Before we really dig in, I love that you are part of the Riley Bombay coaching tree. But before we start digging into this –

Well, I just want to mention I am available for hire. If anybody is running a hockey program out there and you do need a coach, let me know. They can all do better. Actually, they probably can't. They just need a warm body there most times. They could do better, Heath, but they won't. Yeah. Hold on.

I have a question, though, because when the announcer brings us into the Goodwill games and he's introducing us with to the team and we see Julie the cat with the old school disposable camera, which I fucking loved. He says that it's oh, it's a mix of winter and summer event. So it's basketball, swimming, hockey. Do they do that a lot? Is that how it just is? I was surprised that all said all the sports. We're dealing with a fictional. This is a made-up tournament, Heath.

I don't know if you're aware of that. Here's the thing. This is a movie. You know that, right? Don't talk to me. Don't give me the this is a kid's movie, Brandon, because it's called fucking professionalism, don't give me the, this is a kid's movie, Brandon, because they do be, it's called fucking professionalism.

And all they had to do was just do winter, winter sports, you know, instead of, but they had to, they had to like, you know, I guess throw some,

throw some sports out there that like everyone knows America is really good at like swimming and basketball. So I, I don't think they usually do this. I don't think they usually do summer and winter together. I know for the Olympics, they don't, but again,

we've established this. This is way down on the tier of prestige as like the Olympics or whatever. So I would imagine if you're the junior Goodwill games, I would imagine if I was in that like marketing department, I would say say let's throw it all together all at the same time knock it out that way we could kind of save ideally we could save some money if we do it all together all at once versus one in the winter one in the summer you know that's a good point i guess but still threw me off i just wasn't he said that and i was like oh okay okay summer and winter there we go so

anyways um i also like i said i loved uh julie the cat's disposable camera that's that's great you know yeah every everybody's wearing their uh their starter jackets team usa starter jackets you see that those those windbreaker track jacket stuff that's great that's that's excellent amazing excellent stuff i i love that and you know the disposable camera too like remember how excited you get like you drop it off like oh man these these pictures are going to be fucking awesome and then like none of them were like like one in five was like worth keeping they're all out of focus and off center oh man it's just it's just trash everything's like ah shit i thanks for anticipating this so anyways team usa comes in and we are facing our very first opponent brandon trinidad and tobago. Yes. Yes. Double elimination, winner take all.

Yes. And so right before they get to the game, while the announcer guy is kind of giving us the lay down, he mentions double elimination, winner take all tournament. And then they show, they show a screenshot. They're not sure a screenshot.

They show a clip of the standings broken up into two groups. And so we got one, two, three, four, five, two groups of five. So we have 10 teams total.

I'm going to go out on a limb and say that I've never, ever seen a double elimination tournament broken up into groups. know what i'm saying usually yeah so so my my going off of what i you you have a bracket and then you have the bunny bracket underneath exactly so you hit your double elimination so so my the the real life example that i have uh for double eliminations is the college world series are you familiar with that heath uh yeah brandon uh the college world series held yearly in omaha nebraska yeah but you're from iowa heath so it doesn't make any sense don't fucking at me then i'm oh my god.

Brandon, you sick son of a bitch. I'm familiar with the College World Series. Get to your point. But so that – they have eight teams broken up into two groups, double elimination. But like you said, it's a bracket. It's not like a group stage. So that's where I get confused with this this with what they're trying to do with this junior goodwill games thing it doesn't make sense that you would break it into a group

instead of a bracket um if you look at the imdb errors page it's like six pages long because of the incorrect continuity of the junior goodwill games yeah it's in the games played themselves they gave it no thought and no i mean just yes they just expected us to just skate on past all this and it they could have made it not expected the lowest of expectations from us they could it could have been so much easier if they would have just made one or two tweaks, you know, just one or two tweaks. But so but so for everybody listening. So we have 10 teams, two groups of five double elimination. Want to take all group A.

We have Iceland who is already shown to have won a game. They're one. Oh0-0 so far. The second team in Group A is Germany. They also have won a game, 1-0-0. Third team, Team USA. 0-0-0. We haven't played a game yet. Fourth team, Italy.

They lost. They're 0-1-0. And then the fifth team is Trininidad and tobago who team usa is going to play next they're also oh one and oh so far right so then uh shift over to group b we have russia canada france denmark and sweden as the five teams. Now, this is a very interesting group of teams. Again, Iceland doesn't make any sense. They are not a hockey nation. I don't think they – they do have a national hockey team.

I can't remember. I believe their hockey team was started after this movie started though i don't think they had a hockey team while it was going or while this movie was being filmed uh germany makes sense they're usually in there that's a solid hockey nation usa makes sense italy is a little iffy they do have a national hockey team they're not known to be good though trinidad andago, out of fucking left field. Where the fuck did these guys come from? Yeah, but that celebration, we can talk about it when we get there.

I love that celebration. The steel drums in the stands and then their fucking tie-dye uniforms. Amazing. Absolutely the absolute highlight of all the hockey scenes is Tr turned out in tobago game what what the movie i want to see is how they got to the junior goodwill games i want to see that movie it's like a that's i love that like a very cool runnings-esque type of story just exactly cool runnings with hockey that's what i want give me that movie jamaican bobsled team trinidad and tobago hockey that's that's how we expand out

the the mighty ducks cinematic universes i want that fucking movie of them making it to the the 1994 junior goodwill games oh man that's an underdog story we definitely need brought to life that's a disney plus original come on that they're making all kinds of crazy shit now that's what we're that's that's. That's our new pitch. I know we've, especially during Game Changers, we had a ton of pitches to Disney+. That's my new pitch. I might actually fucking seriously try to write that movie.

That's gold. That's got some legs on it for sure. But so then Group B, we got Russia, Canada. Again, great traditional hockey powers. But then Denmark, Sweden, again, traditional hockey teams make sense. France is a little iffy. Again, similar to Italy. They have a hockey team.

Not known to be that great, though. So a lot of these are – it's just a weird group of teams we got going here for Junior Goodwill Games. And then the double elimination thing is never going to make sense. So we're just going to gloss over that. We're going to skip over any kind of continuity errors. It doesn't matter. This movie is too fucking good for continuity.

As I like to say, Heath, we're not here for the plot, okay? Yeah. We're here for just this Golden Ducks content. Yeah. Okay. This quackalicious content, Brandon. Yes. And so they're playing. So after that, we go to Trinidad and Tobago. We're playing. We got this quackalicious content, Brandon. Yes. And so they're playing.

So, so after that, we go to Trinidad and Tobago. We're playing. We got the tie dye jerseys looking fucking fresh as hell. We got team USA up six, nothing, right? Six, nothing, right off the jump. Yeah. That's what the announcer dude says. Exactly.

And then somebody, somebody score. Do you know, do you remember who scores? Somebody scores to make to make it seven nothing pretty quick is it jesse who scores because they no no no it's not jesse because someone scores and then it pans slowly to jesse on the bench celebrating and here he comes brandon our boy russ aka Keenan aka Keenan from Good Burger yeah oh it's uh it's Connie Connie scores

oh Connie scores Connie has some great hockey scenes in this too but I it was so crazy to see how young Keenan looked in this movie so young and he's fucking talking to Jesse and he has he talking to jesse and he has he has my favorite line i think my favorite line for sure of all the mighty ducks

movies in this scene maybe one of my favorite lines of all time right okay he goes he goes uh he's like shouting at jesse from the stands And he's like, yo, my little brother could score on these guys. And then Jesse turns down and goes, well, why don't you go bother him then? And then Keenan Russ hits him with the greatest line in the history of cinema. I'm going to go out and say it. He goes, ha, I don't even have a little brother. Burn. Just call, like, send Jesse to Antarctica for all the ice he needs to recover from that

fucking burn dude that i remember like watching that for the first time as a little kid and fucking laughing for like seven days like i and i love that a little brother that's and the secondary interaction is great too because bombay is like he's like jesse quit quit gabbing and get on the ice show me you want it son go and then russ is like yeah show us you want it son go this gives bombay like a big grin after bombay stares him down he's like okay i'm out that was the most beautiful introduction ever to russ like i loved everything amazing that little brother line even have a little brother so good so then jesse goes out he's he's fuming because he's because uh keaton got the best of him he gets tripped up

by a trinidad guy goes into the the net and then freaks out and starts beating up this poor trinidad and tobago kid yeah yeah misplaced anger there for sure it gets a penalty for two minutes for roughing and then fucking he goes into the box and russ pops up again and he blows the fucking rack knock dude the raspberry on the hockey glass so gross so gross that's how that's classic stuff but there's a lot of germs there that's definitely some influenza getting picked up there that's that's a pre-pandemic move for sure yeah yeah but um the knock knock knock he dissed you bad g and then he hits him with the blow on the glass. And then Jesse is not having it. No, he tries to climb out of the box.

Yep. I loved it. I loved it. And then Russ is like, all right, my work here is done. I am out. And then we get introduction to the Bash Brothers. Oh, I love these guys. Oh, I love these guys as a kid.

And they're putting on their bandanas, giving fist bumps. Fist pump right before. Yeah. Like the old school one. And then Fulton's like, all right, let's have some fun. Yeah, let's do it. And they just start cleaning house, Brandon. First of all, interference. I'm going to count them here.

I knew you were going to say that. So there's one interference, two interference, three. Yeah, so three interference calls. Easy. Right there. Yeah. Should have never happened. Do you see Portman?

Portman punches one home he punches one's home did you see all the the 10 year old girls in the stands losing their mind oh they loved it you know i got a bash brother with a tattoo oh man ladies love the bash loving it tibbles is loving it probably more than the ladies he's the he's the one who dubs them the bash bros that's how we get the nickname you know tibbles is great yeah look at those guys the bash brothers i like this god charlie had some weird interaction they did charlie no justice with the writing in this movie they made him seem like a dork. Yeah, he gives a – yeah, yeah. Like, Charlie's awesome, and they kind of made him seem like a dork, like a real fun sponge. Yeah.

Not inviting him to the party afterwards. He has a weird arc in this movie, and I think it goes back to, like I mentioned in part one of our series for d2 that um they almost recast him and you know one of the directors didn't didn't like joshua um i think it goes back to that painted him as set that sucks well yeah because you have this and then like spoiler alert later on he gives up his spot on the team once banks comes back like um geez brandon quite the spoiler there i i think they were um well first of all anybody who's watching along to this would have already watched the whole movie because it's like a good book you can't you can't put it down you can't put it down i i agree i agree but i um but i think yeah i think it was a combination of that,

and then they're also trying to set him up as Bombay Jr., right? They're trying to, you know. The next Minnesota Miracle Man. Yeah, so that's why he gives up his spot. He's got the clipboard. He's playing the coach role. He does give Banks some good advice here though because banks is pointing out the scouts and charlie's just like don't worry about the

scouts adam just play your best that's easy for fucking charlie to say hans and jan had a good influence on charlie because he's been spending a lot of time there and so they passed on some of that sage wisdom i feel like and that's how i think school banks a little bit you know what i mean but i mean i i completely understand banks being worried about scouts yeah he should be he's got some got some real legs on his career yeah he's he's the one the one kid that could actually turn this into a fucking you know it's into at least a college scholarship yeah but he did turn around and lose the puck did you notice that it was him that lost the puck to the trinidad dude that uh ended up going down to score that gate bella bella fonte was the kid's

name bella fonte yeah it was i went i rewound it back a few times. 99 banks. Um, 99 gives it up. And then, and then, uh, Belafonte fucking jukes Portman out of his shoes. Do you see that? Just out of his fricking skates. I love that. That was embarrassing. Portman fucking gave him the old okey doke.

And I just love that. They, they didn't give two shits that the game was well out of hand they fired that home and they were selling the celebration was on steel drum that's the first that's the first goal oh they ended up with two i think they lost nine two i think the score said yeah yeah nine two went to the newspaper planning nine two was the final for sure yeah thank you so um i do yeah i i do i do love celebration after belafonte scores and we get the steel drum in the stands celebration um it shows uh connie out here again fucking she okie dokes she okie dokes a couple trinidad people and they run into each other yes dirty fucking dangles boys and

then kenny woo goes under the legs yes under the opposing player legs that's classic for the wraparound come on that's that's an amazing goal yeah it is it's fun it's i mean i expected nothing less from kenny woo but yeah i did love that when uh after connie okie dokes the the trinidad people it cuts to the stands and it's like a group of girls losing their mind i thought that was cute that was that was nice yeah that was i noticed that too yeah it's they were you know some some good good empowerment there right exactly and they were they were they were all holding like those uh like the old school 90s like coke cups that you would get at the games you don't talk about yeah oh man yeah yeah just

good old nostalgia great stuff i loved it i loved it and and then you know that's it they wrap up the game and it wasn't a game brandon it was a statement says bombay exactly then it cuts to a the newspaper clipping um again right uh again the newspaper doesn't say anything about anything fucking nonsense right well it's it's why it's definitely secondary news no it was usa today i thought well i mean like they showed it i thought like at one of the back pages or something it was the front page of the sports section it was at the bottom oh wait no

you're right it does flip it flips into the middle you know Brandon one of these days you're going to quit questioning my note taking on this never because you've been wrong before he's and that's all that's all it takes is one wrong as i'm sure i've broken the trust exactly fool me once shame on me or shame on you fool me twice you know get out of here

you know that you've never gotten that phrase right in one of our podcasts i know that's one of my ongoing jokes right in one of our podcasts? I know. That's one of my ongoing jokes. I'm hoping people are catching on to that. That's like a deep state joke for the listeners that really get in there is that Brandon will never get that fucking phrase right. He's never going to know what the phrase is. But so that rounds us out for this for for part three here which uh ends right statement win over trinidad and tobago whoo yeah and so then for part four we'll pick up where

we left off i think we meet i team iceland for the first time right in the next section oh yes we do our boy wolf the dentist st. And we get all the folklore around the name, the introduction. I've got some content for the Hendrix bear for us. I've got a quick mascot breakdown as a former mascot. Of Barry the Bear? Yeah. I've got some critiques, Brandon. I've got some critiques, Brandon. I got some.

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