The Cake Eaters - 54. Game Changers S2:E9 Summer Breezers

Episode Date: March 28, 2023

Heath & Brandon continue their breakdown of Season 2 Game Changers! On today's episode, they are talking through Episode 9 Summer Breezers. They discuss Stevie Nicks, Alex stopping Evan from growing up, missing out on some great Koob and AJ interactions, finally figuring out who Rambo is, the heated rivalry of Brandon vs Rich Eisen, and Brandon breaks down how to grieve a dead parent. Follow us at www.thecakeaterspod.com and on Twitter (@thecakeeaters) and Instagram (@thecakeeaterspod) Email us at [e-mail]

Remember, it's not worth winning if you can't win! This is the Cake Eaters Podcast. Keith, we are in the homestretch here. The penultimate episode. Nothing better than a little summer breezer. Brandon, one might even say it's going to be epic. That was too much. You didn't get it because of the epic camp?

Elite Performance Ice Center? I got much. You didn't get it because of the epic camp? The elite performance ice center? I got it. I got it. I think everybody got it. Yeah. I don't know. It was more the – I didn't mind the idea. It was the execution that I felt was just a bit much. Wow.

You know who else they said was a bit much, Brandon? Coach Cole before he became a winner. thought you were gonna say stevie nicks oh god listen talk about too much stevie stevie back it down a little bit here well you know all i can every time i hear stevie nicks i'm just like uh her poor nostrils you know just i fucking deviated septums just because that's like what happened, right? It's a tragedy. As a fellow deviated septum-er, septum-y,

victim? I'm a victim. You were a victim. Hers was a little more self-inflicted. Oh, yeah. It's neither here nor there. Seventies were a wild time, you know? You can't hate on there 70s were a wild time you know you can't you can't you can't hate on people for having a good time you know especially stevie i'm not gonna hate on

stevie for anything stevie's a fucking national treasure listen i will never argue either the some of the best classics out there were brought to you by Stevie Nicks just crushing some booger sugar. Oh, absolutely, dude. Can you hear Cat Jessie screaming? Calm down. Yeah, I could. She's doing her best Stevie Nicks impression. First of all, there's a diet going on right now for the cat.

And so, you know, Cat Jessie is just not feeling super great about life, if we're being honest. That's fair. We've got a little bit of a standoff here. One second. Sorry, a fight broke out between Kat Jessie and Josie. Oh, God. Not like a real fight, but just like. She's continuing that Stevie Nicks impression.

It's just like Fleetwood Mac, man. Could you hear her? No, I couldn't hear her. Yeah, he just walked into the room, got in her face, and so she was growling, and he's like, no! That sounds exactly like what happened with Fleetwood Mac. Yeah, exactly. It's verbatim.

It's behind the music. That's exactly where that came from. All right. Anyway, so let's get back to this epic, epically amazing episode, Brandon. great name um they've been doing for as much flack as we've given them all season i feel like they've done a fantastic job with the episode title puns i think they're doing great yeah i mean they haven't done everything terrible it's that we talked about this in the last episode brandon it's part of this is us and our expectations. I think all of all the faults can rest on us. I think we can. No, no, no. I am not absolutely not taking on the fault like they should have done better.

They could do better. But it was also our fault for having high expectations for her. It's it's our fault for opening our hearts that's what yeah that's that's you know we thought this was gonna have you know a little bit of more ducks magic in it and we should have known you you kick out bombay and you just you lose that little piece no bombay no scandinavian what are we doing here you know yeah we're in trouble but for now brandon we have a championship banquet. Two teams, one feast. Yeah! Marnie is single-handedly salvaging this show. She's holding this thing together by the goddamn skin of her teeth.

Listen, I love Marnie. She is dusting off some of that. Wasn't she Mad TV, right? Dusting off some of that. Wasn't she Mad TV, right? Dusting off some of that Mad TV gold. Is it Stephanie Weir? Is that her name? I think that's her name. Brandon, are you shitting me?

You just asked me if I could remember. It's Stephanie Weir. I confirmed. Stephanie Weir is her name. Great. Mad TV fame, yes. Yes. Oh, yes. Yes. God, she's dusting off some of that magic,

and she has sprinkled it on this show to salvage what has, you know, all in all just been mediocrity all over the place. Yep, yep. You know, she's – her and – I did like about this episode the AJ-Kub interactions, and I feel like they had a huge missed opportunity of not peppering that in earlier because they made them roommates and everything. We didn't get – other than the Kub pain for an autograph, did they interact at all? No, and that will go down. They play so well off of each other. act at all no and that will go down you know if they play because we're gonna have to do we're gonna i was thinking about this this morning brandon when before recording we still

got to do a golden cakey's episode for this garbage but like it's the missed opportunity everything yeah but like this is probably the number one missed opportunity is kuban aj play off each other so well if they would have built this we'll get into it we'll get into it at the at the end when they just had that golden moment but if we would have built even more like what the fuck their interactions at the banquet here when they're getting each other's faces are great it's fantastic yeah like the tension should have been building between them for this entire episode. But then you realize that they're just buds all along.

Just two people that just saw the world in a different view. And sometimes you can come together. All it takes to bring people together is Stevie. That's all it takes. Just a campfire and a guitar brandon and we'll all be singing kumbaya you just gotta let you gotta let the landslide take you down preach i don't know why they're singing landslide i i imagine there's a million songs that they could have sung i just i was shocked i imagine they're playing landslide because that's the

only song alex knows how to play there's no way she was actually playing the guitar um oh no i think because she she brings out the guitar in like episode two and i specifically remember mentioning it there's no way that the character of alex morrow knows how to play the fucking guitar there's no way she's the worst i just i have no patience or love left for the character of alex morrow it was yeah it was on thin ice on season one and now it is just she did everything the wrong way for the right reasons but she did everything i would i would argue i would argue her reasons were not correct so she just wanted work-life balance brandon she just went about it in the worst way humanly possible at least that's what i interpreted as it's like she didn't want work-life balance she was trying she's trying desperately trying her goddamn hardest to make sure that Evan doesn't grow up.

That's what all this is about. It's so that she doesn't want Evan to grow up. That's what all this is about. It's her projecting her own insecurities onto her kid, which is the worst thing you can do as a goddamn parent. Stop projecting on your kids. She's maybe being selfish and inconsiderate that's the only two words you can use to describe her character anyways we don't have to talk about her anymore she's the worst um she didn't have that skip over all of her scenes

which is 90 of the show oh my god it just there were so many scenes i was like god damn it what why and the whole we'll get into it but the heart to heart with jace and coach cole was just are you talking about at the end at the end of this yeah sorry spoiler alert but my god i got that is some of the worst acting i got thoughts on that um i'm trying to be i just i'm trying to be nice i know know these are – dude, they tried their hardest, but God, that was – I have thoughts on that. As somebody who has lost their mother, I had very strong thoughts about that scene. I can't wait for this coaching. All right, so let's build to that, Brandon.

Let's get the listeners on their toes waiting for that because we got Marnie saying, you know, the icy center of our icy center or some shit like that. She tried to make a joke there. And he's giving – Wait. What she said was fantastic in like a tongue twister kind of sense. She said at the icy center of our elite ice center, I think is what she said, right? Yeah, yeah, that's what it was.

Classic Marnie. Like, that's a terrible line, but delivered by Marnie, by Stephanie Weir, it's fantastic. It comes off like... She said, oh, I did not mean for it to sound like that. She's like, she... I did not mean for it to sound like that. She's like she. I know we already missed it.

But she's a brilliant comedic actress. To be able to take the garbage that they give her and turn it into something that's at least somewhat funny is, you know, an Oscar-worthy feat. I guess it would be an Emmy. I guess it would be an Emmy because it's a TV show. Yeah, she deserves an emmy for this performance she took uh if if we would have had more of her from episode one it also may have salvaged the show yeah uh because she because she has another line not to skip it just skip ahead a little bit they get into like a weird little food fight and then she's like she's like

in the background of alex and and uh coach cole and she's like running with the walkie-talkie. I've got it. Not to jump ahead, but I got it all written down. But yeah, go ahead. Yeah, go. Give us the whole line because I only have – I have like a paraphrase version. Okay, wait. Hold on.

Now I have to jump ahead to my notes. Hold on. It's a great line. It's – I'm blanking on the first part where she's talking about the signs. She's like, I need all wet floor signs to the cafeteria stat. This is what we train for, people. Classic Marnie. Again, not that great of a line, but the way she does it, she's like running across the screen.

And it's like it wasn't like a run though it was like a super fast power walk it was a power walk it was absolutely yeah it was like a it was like a uh like a middle school principal power walk is what it was just like i was just about to say which my mom is the secretary at the high school middle school and that is a mama d getting to the last store the mall power walk that like you are at a full sprint to keep up with like that power walk is so powerful she sometimes gets a bad hip after it oh yeah you gotta stretch your forehand mama d yeah actually speaking of power walking have you not to like completely derail us for a second but have you ever watched olympic power walking competitions i i haven't in a long time but i have watched it before yeah

oh my god there is that form the that form that they use when they're powering through, it is absolute gold. If I were ever to compete in an Olympic sport, absolutely fucking bet it would be power walking. I've got super long legs, dude. I can make some ground keeping that back heat. I think because you have to keep one foot or one heel on the ground at all time. And that's why they have that crazy-ass form. You know? But, all right. So, listeners, next Summer Olympics, check out the power walking. Brandon, it might have been us at a bar in Denver when we watched that.

Because I was at a bar in Denver. Might have been. Might have been. That might have actually, I think, might have been. That might have actually. That actually, I think, might have been. There's some great Olympic sports that they don't ever really show. I'm glad because I'm a sucker for curling. I'm glad curling is finally getting its due. The next Winter Olympics, we're going to Omaha.

Dude, the curling championships are always in Omaha. They fucking sell out every year heidi i joined like i joined heidi has like gear from now oh i i don't have gear i i was about to get some gear because i joined a curling um there was a curling center not too far from where i live where we lived in atlanta um the peach tree curling association shout out shout out yeah but i did a couple classes there and learned how to do it and then i joined shut the fuck up yeah really yeah i made danny come with me to one of them and then uh and then i joined i joined one of their teams but it was right when covet hit so they shut it before before i actually got to play

they shut it down oh but there's a couple out here there's a couple curling so there's actually one in like lakewood i think that's not too far from golden we should oh nice okay dude kelly's always telling me i need to get a hobby dude all i will a thousand percent do curling with you a thousand okay okay dude well let me let me get settled. We'll get settled in Q1, and then we'll revisit this. And then maybe that is a sidebar episode of the pod. He and Brandon's curling adventure. All right, all right, all right. So, sorry, I didn't mean to get us too off topic.

I'm not even sure how we got there, but we're going to bring it back in. We're going to bring it back in. Hour-walking Marnie, that's how we got there but um we're gonna bring it back in we're gonna bring it back in our walking marnie that's how we got there that's right that's right so so let's jump back to where we were before you jumped ahead because i thought yeah so we get coach coach cole's given this speech and i feel terrible for him because this is his favorite night of the year and it has been ruined by alex and the ducks and that i just i empathize with him dude dude the moment when he was talking to alex and he was like he's like sullen and he's looking down at his shoes and he was like this is my this was my favorite night of the year i almost i was heartbroken i almost cried yeah this poor guy this yeah and then alex is like, why are you going to blame me?

Yeah. This crazy fucking lady comes in and ruins his life. Yeah. It just, I hate it. So anyways, yeah. So he's given the speech. Evan's pouting. They're trying to celebrate the blood, sweat, and tears.

And Marnie says, let's hear it for blood and tears. Had to get that in there. And so then we get the buffet line is open, Brandon. And Jace does probably the most awkward arm around my girlfriend moment in the history of cinema. That made me physically angry. It was the worst thing I've ever seen in my entire life. Yeah. It was – I would rather watch like gory Saw videos than watch him put his arm around a girl.

Like Saw guy cutting his arm off from the handcuffs was easier to watch than that. Yeah. Because he did it. He like threw it up and then he like slumped the rest of his body down. Like putting all of his weight on her. It's like, hey, let me sad boy lean on you or something. I don't know. I don't know.

Maybe we're just to the point where we don't understand these sad fucking youths anymore, Brandon. I'm not a big arm around your shoulder while walking person like if we're sitting down and we're chilling yeah or hold hands that's a great move when you're walking because it's easy it doesn't encumber anybody but the arm around the shoulder and then trying to it's like it's like doing a three-legged uh like a potato sack race or a three-legged race um when you throw your arm around there because now you're both of your balances are tied to each other yeah it's it's the worst i'm not the best at holding hands so brandon i got long arms and so i've either got to like hoist it up or like the girls got to like

tip over and so it's just kind of yeah and you you and kelly not, you're not hot. You're not height. You're not height proportionate. You're it's very lopsided. I'm a bit taller. Yeah. You gotta, you gotta dump Kelly and find somebody your height. Then you can start holding hands. When we first met, when we first met, I am probably, I think still now I, I weigh two of her. Two of Kelly equals one Heath. Anyways. All right.

Okay. Awkward arm around. And then we get Evan. I love this. Like, fuck yeah, Evan. Dude, that guy's being a real fucking turd sandwich. Like, he's a turd. Jace is the turd in the punch bowl, Brandon.

That's what his character is. They just wrote him as a trash trash kid i know i hate that kid i know i've mentioned this before but yeah they didn't know they didn't try to make him likable at all or if they did try they failed miserably it's miserably but yeah so evan bumps him and just like you got a problem and and evan's like no i don and just like, you got a problem? And Evan's like, no, I don't have a problem. You got a problem? And Sophie's like, yeah, Evan, you got a problem? He's like, I'm just trying to get the pesto, bro.

Yeah, just trying to get served with my team, GTFO. And Jace is like, well, here, let me help you. And in a real shithead move yeah just waste the pasta and dumps it all over evan did he start jay started this you know yeah yeah this is 100 jace yeah yeah and then we got normally i'm not one to side with evan but you know i just didn't like jason this scene no he's not likable at all in any of the any of his scenes um we do get uh aj coming to the rescue though well first nick hits us with listen you guys let's not let's not get carried away i'm getting real good at laundry and pesto is going to be a new challenge um getting real good like

i needed sophie to be better but she's like, you chose to leave the Ducks. And he's like, the fucking dude's, his dad drafted me. I didn't choose anything. My mom was the fucking asshole that made it the Ducks versus everyone by not following the rules and drafting a team like a normal coach would. Like it's his mom's fucking fault. Dude, imagine. i think we've talked about this before but imagine how much better as hockey players and as people they would have gotten over the summer if they weren't all on the same fucking team still yeah they meet new people

different thought processes like that's you need to like this corporate america listen up again you don't you need to diversify thought processes on your team so that you can be most effective while trying to be creative or trying to get better you can't just all be thinking the same way then you cannibalize the thing and then you turn out a piece of trash looking at you disney looking at you disney diversify thought processes in the writer's room so that someone will speak up and say hey looks like we have got a real trash show on our hands we should do better for these kids did we learn nothing from coach orion in d3 that's exactly what he did. He came in, he diversified the thought process. Change is hard at first, but it's worth it, Heath.

God, well, and then we get AJ. I got pesto on my wingman. Not cool. I was going to say, I can't fucking wait for D3. It's going to be fantastic. D3 is going to be great. I'm either going to love it or hate it, and either way, we're going to fight about it. But yeah, don't be getting pesto on my wingman.

AJ comes flying in. Oh, God. He just – he'd love to see him really come into his own. Connor DeWolf's the guy who plays him. He crushes – he delivers every line flawlessly like much like barney because that line was great um don't be putting pesto on my wingman and then the line he had at the end of the last episode when he's talking to evan in the dorm room when yeah uh evan's like go you do you dude go do whatever you want uh go run 10 miles right before bedtime

gonna keep that heart rate up brandon yeah and then aj what does he say he says something like you know what you see some cool captain stuff dude and he walks away well he he matches it here in just a second because kube and aj are confronting each other and they're kind of a little back and forth and Coop's like man how many face creams can one person have and AJ lays the smack down he says I have a routine and I begged you to use my toner again not a great line but delivered perfectly like this should have been happening all throughout this episode 9 and we're getting absolute gold laid down by Coob and AJ

this could have saved this this show this could have saved it the kicker is they made them roommates it was all there this is why we're so mad at the show it's right there they did the right thing by making them roommates great fucking idea but use it like show us that mad at the show they did right there they did the right thing by making them roommates great

fucking idea but use it like show us that i feel like that i feel like they do that a lot where they they set up real interesting storylines but then they don't show you the middle part of it they just show you the end of it and it's like why are we cutting out the most interesting parts of what could be the what could be the most interesting parts of what could be the what could be the most interesting parts of the show like the same thing not to jump ahead again but later on when they decide not to go to the championship game yeah we don't see i would have loved to see that not to jump ahead spoiler alert brandon but like i would i would have loved to see that discussion or that scene where they're like

where Sophie's rallying everybody and being like we're not doing it convincing team dominate to join their Duxishness that would have been great to see but instead it just cuts to the end and it's like boom

anyway keep going alright sorry we finished well anyways long story short the kids are fighting throwing down foods everywhere coach cole comes in banquet's over um and then we cut to the courtyard and he is looking dejected and once again you feel terrible for him and alex comes in with full lack of self-awareness. Let me guess. This is somehow my fault. And I wrote in my notes.

Yes, this is 100% your fault. You have fully established the toxic environment that we are now living in by constantly undermining the individuals in charge. And it just, I, she has a, it just like, it's fine. If you want to like sprinkle in some work-life balance. So go in there, win the trust of the coach, do things his way for a little bit. And then, Hey coach, we've been working really hard. What do you think about X, Y, and Z? Maybe at the end of the tournament, we have a pool party or a lake party.

It's not completely unreasonable. He's going to let him eat ice cream. Swimming is better than eating ice cream. Yeah. She has a line in the scene where she says, you know, me, she's talking to Coach Cole. She's like, me and you had like our – I forget exactly what she says. We had our differences. We started our – we got all this tension between me and you, and I think it got to the kids.

And I wrote in my notes, you think? You think the kids that are in there throwing pesto at each other may be caught on to the fact that you two don't like each other yeah they yeah i i hate it i hate it all um but but we got that marnie gold when she was like this is what we've been waiting for yeah you got to be careful around these these 14 and like 13 year old kids they're they're very impressionable they're like puppies they're gonna mirror exactly what you're fucking doing yeah so looking at you teachers and parents be better mainly just i don't care i really don't i feel like it's an epidemic of like people projecting their own insecurities and shit onto their kids that's just like you end up with all these like these kids have no accountability because the parents have no accountability for

themselves of not doing it's like okay well maybe not doing a very good job timmy turned out a fucking asshole so i i should probably take ownership and do something about it yeah i don't know like i said earlier, like projecting your own insecurities or worries or fears or whatever onto anybody, let alone your own kids is like, it's the worst thing you can fucking do. Yeah.

So anyway, it's fine. They're not, they are not you. You are not them. You know, just stop having kids. You know, we're overpopulated anyways. We're, we're, we are like 10 years from a dystopian world.

Like, dude, just, let's just hope that we're in the sector that like, you know, I'm hoping I'm gone by then. I, yeah. Yeah. Cause like, you know, if we're both in colorado we're going to be in like the mining sector and stuff like that so that's not going to be super fun work yeah we could just go hide in the hide in the mountains though that's true yeah oh dude should we be like like scrappy rebels up and living like living up in the mountains i'm not

i don't know if i'm trying to be a rebel no you're not a fighter i'm not trying to save anybody else this is this is my life i'm trying to save me and me alone that's a that's a real fucking slytherin move i hope you know that bud that's all i can hear right now brandon is i am a slytherin wow jokes on you I'm a Hufflepuff. I Hufflepuffs would have wanted to save everyone. I, the Gryffindor, would they would end up and fight the man and be brave and bold. You know, you know, at one point, us Hufflepuffs did want to save everybody. But then a little thing called Cedric Diggory happened and we realized that you can't save everybody and it's pointless. Oh dude.

RIP said, you know, he just gone too soon, you know, and he really did get the short end of the stick, right? Like with whole, with all Rita,

Rita Skeeter, just, you know, leaving him out of the introductory article for all the champions that's just it's a real travesty you got to feel bad for his parents too you know it's such an exciting time and he's just afterthought in the back page and it's and he was handsome too right you know just yeah robert pattinson yeah well did you see that they recreated some of the i'm not a big fan of that the movies from three to eight because they did the seventh book twice is just hard pass it's like it's like the it's like the new lord of the it's like the new Lord of the... It's like the Hobbit movies, right?

Where they're not terrible movies, but they're just loosely based on the books. They're not based on the books. That's fair. They're just like gently bumping up against it. I prefer my Harry Potter Audible. Jim Dale reading it to me, man. All day. We can cut this out all right where are we at all right so all right so the kids are picking up the stuff and evan and jace are like

hey pick up that rib and he's like no you pick it up you spilt it it's like i know i didn't and then so we're fighting again because kube and aj are back at each other's throats be like my boy doesn't drop fucking ribs yeah does he look like he would drop a rib no oh it's good stuff and then sophie yells everyone down she says you know we are all miserable got fucking beans in my hair you know we're supposed to be having the time of our lives but instead coach alex has turned us all against each other again this is sophie's right this is a great point uh and not only a critique about alex but also critique about the show what why is this the first time that i'm learning paul's name yeah paul paul looks like a fucking stand-up guy we We already asked for this.

Remember the girl that had lines in the last episode for the ice bath? I still don't know who that girl is. Yeah, we still don't know her name. Why the fuck does she not get a shout-out from everyone, or at least a name, so that when the credits roll, we can get, you know, I don't know what kid, Hayley or something, you know? That's know what kid hayley or something you know that's the first i was thinking of uh modern family okay hayley um hayley dumpy yeah oh shoot that's definitely not her though that's for sure no no no but that was just the first thing that popped

into my head i couldn't think of like a you know who you know who you know who i should have thought of is the um what so i'm gonna see if she if her name's listed in the credits okay yeah start start reaching uh researching that and i'll start ripping through a little bit of this because oh fuck you know who she is yeah so we i guess we do we do learn her name earlier on in the show they just don't put a face to it that's rambo remember when nick says one of the girls legal names is rambo this that's rambo are you fucking kidding me and we had to go the whole show and we would have never known that that girl's that is fucking of course it's rambo god damn it that once again why wouldn't they have her face to that name that that oh my god that's such a again missed opportunity right like that she should have been the bad

bitch in camp fucking people up on the ice. That's your. You put her with Gertie and that's your fucking bash sisters. My God. Yes. Or like a little Gertie versus Rambo rivalry or something where like who's the crazier one? I don't know. Gertie's too nice for that kind of rivalry. Yeah, dude. You don't know what Gertie's like on the ice.

She could turn into a vicious wolverine. Dude, she's got to survive in the wilderness of Alaska. You don't know shit about Gertie. Dude, they did. Whoever is. Again, for these credits, I'm just looking on IMDb. I don't know how. I don't know how official IMDb is.

But whoever did the IMDB is, but, um, whoever did the IMDB credit list, they did Paul dirty, real fucking dirty. Didn't even list him. They have him listed as random guy. And it says his goddamn name in the episode.

Oh, wow. Wow. And, and well, they didn't give the other guy a name that the one that likes the succulents. Oh, maybe that's the succulent guy

where's yeah but there's no one there's no paul paul's not listed though i assume that's paul because there's nobody else that would oh no the succulent guy so paul's listed as a random guy and then the succulent guy is listed as big guy nice oh because that's how she addresses him hey big guy what's your deal oh and he's like so they got that right they didn't get paul come on guys that's brandon once again why do you have any form of expectations for this show this is like this is imdb is like wikipedia right anybody can edit it, I think. I don't know. I'm assuming it's some.

Get in there and change that up for him. Get fucking Paul as dude. Put some respect on Paul's name. Yeah. I'm glad we finally figured out who Rambo is, though. Because that was one of my favorite lines. One of the girls' legal name is Rambo. Oh, dude. Dude, I might have to name my daughter Rambo now

Well and she just looked She looked like Rambo dude She was fucking Chalk that up as another missed opportunity Rambo should have been She should have been Not a main character but like a fun side character That just flexes on people

Like Rambo fuck you up like the enforcer of the, of the dominate. I could do with less fries and then fill that time with Paul and Rambo. Yeah. So, all right, well, long story short,

Gertie finally figures out who Evan is. Evan is sad. He misses his friends. They, we get a big group hug. We are all in a very nice kumbaya moment. Real quick fix. Yep.

Yep. This is a lot of short-term memory going on. I know. That's middle school, 13, 14-year-olds for you. What have you done for me lately? Kind of stuff. Yeah. Then we cut and we've got your boy, your favorite, Rich Eisen on the mic.

I have in my notes, Goddamn Rich Eisen again. Dude, I was never a listener to the Rich Eisen podcast, but someone had recommended it so i was kind of like oh maybe i'll do it i'm out full full out on i'm sorry rich i loved you on sports center as a kid growing up but um this how how the mighty have fallen a quick message from our friends at Broken Forest Collective.

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but the only problem is, Brandon, we have two coaches and no teams. The only person who bothered to show up? Rich Eisen. Yep, and that's not who I wanted who bothered to show up, Rich Eisen. Yep. And that's, you know, that's, that's not who I wanted.

That's, but you know, the good news is, is that we get a little taste of Marnie again, because she says, I have looked everywhere for the kids, even got stuck in the big freezer for a little while. Can't find them anywhere.

Have you ever been stuck in a big, have you ever been stuck in the big freezer? It's a, it's a harrowing experience for sure. Uh, no, I've never been stuck in the big freezer. Um, it's, it's just, you know, there's always been an out. Unless someone like locked the door and then you just hang out. Cause usually. I worked at a.

Usually in the big freezer, you were, you know, having a little sip of your cocktail. You know, maybe. That's what the big fridge is for. You don't go in the big freezer. Unless you get something out of the freezer. See, we used the freezer because that was less attended to. Right? Like, you got people ripping in and out of the cooler all the time

but the big freeze usually just end of the day yeah the well the people ripping in and out of the big cooler were usually people that were also ripping partaking you know yeah um i worked at uh i worked at a mini i think i brought this up on the podcast before i worked at a mini golf slash go-kart place for like seven years yes you did and there were there were lots of jokesters there that did like to lock the big freezer if you wandered in there so nice that's a dangerous game best to stay away unless you unless you absolutely need that bag of chicken tenders you know at your own risk or you prop that fucker open when you go in. Exactly. All right.

So then, oh God, this was so annoying. Then Evan texts Alex and says, you were right. You can't win summer. And I, to put my notes, bring it in.

I hate this show so much. I hate the people that attach this trash to the dust like it's quit making like out whatever it's fine don't why are they feeding alex's ego this is now she's like i saved the summer this is all me oh you i guarantee yeah that was her first thought when she got that text was I was right. Yeah. And then so she wanders out. And so long story short, they're at the lake. Oh, I – They're fucking swimming. I wrote down when they're going through the whole thing where they're – Coach Cole is on the bench.

Alex is on the bench. Rich Heisen's in the the fucking broadcast booth and there's no kids anywhere I wrote down in my notes this is some real Bombay shit where we're not meeting the kids in the locker room you know why why are we not like meeting in a team as a team getting dressed as a team you know you're just leaving these kids to their own devices until the actual time of puck drop and with the amount of children in this area did so i haven't you had to have seen them moving in droves off campus in bathing gear so i have suits right somebody had to right somebody had to but so my question is are are the other teams still there or is it just these two teams that are that are there because it whenever they show like

the cam at the very end of season or episode 10 they show all the buses taking all the teams back and so it just it's not not surprisingly it contradicts itself because yes it did seem like it was only ducks and dominate at that thing so maybe everyone else was just sad they weren't playing in the championship game and the two teams that were supposed to be doing it were being they were worse about it yeah yeah because when everybody that was at the that's at the lake it didn't seem like it was the whole camp. No, but we don't know. They didn't do like a panoramic of the camera.

They just focused on the key players. Nobody took a roll call? Yeah. Cha-cha-boo-chee, cha-cha-boo-chee. Roll call. That's a great scene from The Office. But I did like... You know what I'm talking about yeah but

uh my name is kevin yeah they call me kevin sorry all right talking about marnie skipping ahead just a little bit i just want to point out a really good line that she had when they uh um or it might be the scene it's when they't, they can't find any of the kids. And she, she like blurts out, should I prepare a statement or something like that? Isn't that what she says? I didn't hear that.

I didn't think I heard that. Oh, that's good stuff. And then we have, so Alex shows up to the lake. Sophie's like, we're not playing in your game. And she's like, good.

And it's, I hate it all. But Sophie and Maya were recapping that, you know, Sophie ended up being a real rebel by leading a coup and a. You know how you, you know how you become your true rebel. A mutiny? No, I was going to say you be yourself. Oh, well, I thought you meant lead a mutiny at a camp. Well, yeah, but you can't lead a mutiny if you're not being true to yourself.

Yeah, well, that's true. That's true. And then we see our two sad boys, Evan and Jace, becoming sad boy friends in the water on their inner tubes um and then we get our boy nick joining maya on the dock i hated the scene so goddamn much because you don't want 125 spf thicker than toothpaste well first of all my my first my first problem is he walks up and he goes can i share your light when they're completely engulfed in shade made no sense and then and then this this whole thing comes out of fucking left field

yeah like no build up no build up nothing and you know that you know they're gonna drop it they're never gonna bring it up again yeah it could have been a payoff there there could this could have been a payoff moment where like there's no there's one subtle hints throughout throughout throughout there's like there's the way the one scene from like episode two when he runs away and maya is like she gets like visibly upset that's the only somewhat hint somewhat you know wink that they gave other than that this came out of fucking left field and that's too that's too far away for the payoff if that's the only thing you're gonna drop you need it to be a lot closer to this because everybody everybody forgot about that uh it's terrible and and poor goddamn mj fuck you nick fuck you well now he's

gonna have because his britches are gonna be too big for mj now that he's had a taste of maya i know what what does he say he goes now now that i know that this has ever been a possibility or something is even in the realm of possibility i will always always like you. Yeah, he's like, just whenever you're interested again, let me know. Even if I'm married with three kids, I'll fucking kill them. Who cares? I will definitely abandon my future family for you. But she's – but Maya's over it though. She's already – she's dating Paul, right?

I think that's what they said. Yep, yep. And that made sense. Paul is a great guy. And then we get Alex and Evan. You know who Nick – if we've completely forsaken MJ, you know who Nick needs to go after? Rambo. Oh, that would be a great –

Dude, imagine the strength of Rambo with the sensitivity of Nick and his moms. They would be unstoppable. The perfect pair. Wedding bells. I hear them. All right. So then Alex and Evan resolve all their dumb stuff. We'll move on past that.

And then we get back to the ice. Josh Duhamel is sitting there alone and Marnie comes up. Good news. The kids are alive. They went to the lake. And he's like, for what reason? And Marnie says, I love him and frolic. So this just dawned on me now that you brought that you said what Marnie said.

So that means Alex got the text message from Evan. Didn't relay the intel back to Coach Cole. He's just worrying. Didn't tell Coach Cole that they're at the lake. And then she proceeds to leave and go to the lake without telling him either. What a great chaperone. What a great employee.

10 out of 10. I mean, she would have been fired 10 times before this episode if she was i would have i would have fired her the first day when she showed up 30 minutes late with a bag of french fries uh 40 minutes late 40 minutes my bad that's even worse i was giving her the benefit of the doubt my apologies that's that's your fault all right so then we get and then we get your boy rich eyes and awkwardly leaving and i put in my notes i kind of dislike him so much less after the show and it's it's sad yeah he uh i mean i don't i don't fault the guy for taking taking the paycheck but

he probably should not have done this yep yep it's rough rough on the old brand um and then we get aj's dunking fools in the water coops talking to fries about how he's scared and fry says just let him beat you up easiest way well if aj comes at you it's best just to be submissive okay i don't like fries i don't care for fries yeah he's he's he should have been sad boy friends with evan and and i say he's another he's another fucking sad boy i don't need i don't need i don't need three sad boys in my show one was plenty yeah that's disgusting but then we get toby being toby and he says i like the way the light shines off my girlfriend's neck again or should i or yeah my girlfriend's neck or should i say woman friend for you are no mere girl again they're a hundred percent in the shade

which i know i know they're in the shade for filming like so that they the lighting lighting in film but don't don't talk about being in the sun i don't know why you aren't talking about continuity in this show we're in nine episodes deep and there's nothing good about it as evidenced by as evidenced by my love for d1 and d2 i can look past continuity years no problem but these But when it's like that in your face Where they're like oh my god look at how Look at how sunny it is and they're standing directly In the shade You know

Anyways so then we go back And this is where Maya Talks about how she likes him So we'll skip that since we already talked about it And then Coach Cole comes back And he just She likes him, so we'll skip that since we already talked about it. And then Coach Cole comes back and he just – Everybody's fucking terrified. Yep, as they should be because they were – Because they're playing hooky with hockey.

Hooky and hockey? What does he say? Yeah. Yeah, he's like, you guys are playing hooky and hockey. Hockey, hooky. Hooky, hockey. I don't think hooky and hockey. Hockey, hooky. Hooky, hockey. I don't think I wrote it down. I was, man, this show ruined my note-taking ability while watching this.

I was just like, oh, my God. Why? It's not worth the detail. Like, they didn't give a shit about the details, so why should I? You know? And that's all I'm saying. Oh, here we go. Playing a little hooky from hockey.

Hooky from hockey. That's what it is. Yeah, okay. Got it. Hockey here we go. Playing a little hooky from hockey. Hockey from hockey. That's what it is. Yeah. Okay. Got it. Hockey. Hockey. But then we have coach Cole cannonballing and then he gets out of the water.

And Alex is like, what is happening? I wrote in my notes. What is happening? Great question. Nobody knows. Nobody knows. I mean, let's just, let's just say it i hate i hate the love story alex is the worst could you imagine being one of evan's teachers oh yeah no mother of pearl alex would have been in your fucking classroom she drove coach t she drove coach t to a mental breakdown yes imagine what she has done

to every poor teacher who is already underpaid that's why they're you know like the execution of our educational system has fallen apart as our teachers wages have stagnated during a time of inflation it's especially in the twin cities, dude. Yeah. My God. And then you got shit head parents like Alex that are probably in their lunch all fucking day about like,

dude, parent your stupid ass kid and leave the teacher to teach. Yeah. You know, but anyways, to get back with, with coach Cole, so he does a cannonball he comes to the you know the realization that alex was right you can't win summer

cold water is good for your circulation all that jazz again i think i would have liked i get the they have to cut stuff to get to keep it down to 30 minutes i wonder i want i i wonder what they're going to do with season three if they're even going to do a season three because they cut from season they cut from season one to season two from an hour episode to 30 minute episodes yeah and this has not been good enough for people to watch it but so i get i get they need to cut stuff but again they're cutting all of the wrong stuff and leaving in the shit stuff i would have liked to have a glimpse at him coming to this realization so because it comes out of nowhere again yeah like he's been the same

person the whole time yeah like it would have been nice to like have a nod or a wink or some kind of subtle anything no like i guess you get a terrible storytelling yeah beginning to end terrible storytelling yeah because like they they leave they leave one or two little hints for each thing but they're so far removed from the payout that it doesn't connect but But yeah. So it's like constant one eighties. People are always doing constant one eighties. And, and so we, we go from.

Evident Alex's nonsense to I'm going to tee up for this Brandon, because we got Jace and coach Cole walking through the woods, having a heart to heart. You're a coach, but before we get to that, you missed a line. There's a line that during the Alex-Coach Cole conversation where she admits to projecting her own fears onto Evan because she says maybe this whole thing wasn't about having a fun summer.

Maybe it was me trying to stop, uh, stop Evan growing up. I needed, I needed a summer with Evan. I needed it. I, I apologize.

I summarized it as she, of course, selfishly wanted one more summer with him as a kid. So she submarines a hockey Institute for her own selfish, inconsiderate reasons that should be the synopsis on imdb for the whole season is a selfish mother wants one last fun summer with her kids so she submarines the elite performance ice center yeah america's greatest youth hockey program what a real piece of work unbelievable unbelievable but let's get

i'm glad you like that quick recap so all right so let me we can now we move it over we got jace we got coach cole they're walking through the woods coach cole is like you know turns out putting things in a box as you mentioned turns out not talking about stuff it's not good for you you know um yeah so let's let's let's let's get through the dead mom stuff here as as somebody who lost their mom as a child they make the cardinal fucking mistake which is they don't talk about it you gotta fucking talk about it for how how long? Like, my God. Well, I think she's been gone for a couple years, like three years. They mentioned like some sort of time thing early on in one of the episodes.

I missed it. I think he said she died a couple years ago or something like that. Still fairly fresh, but too long to have no no no no no that's for damn sure no no no i'm remembering now she coach cole mentions that she died when jace was four that's so like 10 years ago potentially i'm like 95 sure on that that he says he dies she died when he was four so yeah 10 years nothing like a 10 year buffer they haven't talked about the mom in 10 fucking years 10 goddamn years that's the that's the cardinal mistake when when a loved one passes away is to not talk about it you gotta

talk about it you gotta bring it up you bring up the good times bring up the bad times too that helps yeah you gotta process that's part of the processing and for the love of for the love of god Bring up the good times. Bring up the bad times too. That helps. Yeah. You got to process. That's part of the processing. For the love of God, go to fucking therapy. Oh my God. Especially if he was four years old when it happened. I mean, maybe not put him in therapy when he's four years old because that's – Wait until he starts asking the questions that you are not fit to talk about.

You go together and you pay someone to facilitate that conversation for you. That's the whole purpose of it. And we've been very clear from the beginning on this podcast, like on our stance on this. You got to go fucking talk to people. Communicate. Fucking communicate. our stance on this you got to go fucking talk to people communicate fucking communicate like if you are in a space where you are dealing with some stuff upstairs if you are not going to talk to a therapist about it you got to change that now you just have to and i mean it fucking helps man

even if it's just like this much, it still fucking helps. For sure. For sure. It does a tiny bit. I mean therapy can be a bit expensive. So I get not wanting to pay for that. But in that case, you need to find people in your life. And by find people in your life to communicate with, I don't mean dump it all on your friends. I mean make sure that they're make sure everybody's you know okay with what's going on again communicate your expectations beforehand and then it's all

talk talk to people about stuff especially about like google google youtube like you could have googled how to have a conversation right like coach cole could have googled how to have a conversation, right? Like coach Cole could have Googled that and just anyways, it's fine. And it's just communicate. This scene drove me absolutely up a tree because it was, this is so dumb, but like,

you know, it may, it might happen sometimes. I just hated it. It definitely was very poorly acted. It definitely does. I mean, there's,

it definitely does have does. I mean, there's, it definitely does have people. I mean, everybody grieves in their own way and it's very tough. It's, it's, and a lot of people think that they just not talking about it. It's the best way to go, but that's the,

it's the, it's the Cardinal sin. You can't talk about it. Um, and I have, as somebody who's dealt with a, with a, with a parent,

with a mom passing away when I was like, have zero sympathy for for other people it's you're zero okay no be honest like this is your opinion of jace being the worst being a sad boy well yeah being a sad boy he's you got to talk about it my my two advices if you lose a loved one is to communicate, number one, and number two, get over it. You can't – it's one of those things. You can't let it affect everything, right? You just got to – Eventually, you have to move on. It's the worst – it's the part that no one will say out loud because it fucking sucks.

Eventually you have to move on because it's not going to change. And the way that you get to the point where you're able to move on is you talk about it. Yeah. Brandon, we need – hey, grief counselors, listen up. Get brandon's number you don't need to be a hockey coach brandon you got a second calling i don't know i don't know i don't know if i would be a great grief counselor because i have zero sympathy for these for these these fucks you know no that that conversation drove me crazy because now that and it drives me even crazier now that I realize it's been 10 years since she died. To not talk about her at all.

It's one of those things where not only is he not talking to his kid about his mom passing away. It seems like he's not talking to his kid about anything. Yeah. And that's where – and that's where that's where like that and that's his fault right like you are a parent of a child who is depending on you to get through this and you this is why him and alex are a great pairing because you are selfishly in your own shit and in your own feelings instead of helping him yes yeah he's he's trying to grieve his way which he thinks it's putting things in a fucking box

and then he's doing that to his he's forcing that shit on his 14 year old kid, four year old kid at the time. And it's ruining his, not only his relationship, not only his relationship with his kid, but his kid's relationship with everybody. Yeah. Now he just doesn't want to talk to anyone. Yeah. Be a part of anything.

Yeah. It's, it's crazy. But yeah. And then the, then they mentioned that, um, he mentions that,

um, the lake they're that um he mentions that um the lake they're at was apparently his the his mom's favorite place in the world and that's why he put the ice center there and jace goes why the fuck would you never tell me that he you could have fixed the glitch right there hey did i ever tell you this you're you're feeling down you're not like in hockey right now you know let me re-engage you by telling you this story of why i'm even doing all this shit and you know what would be a great and helpful thing for him to process and grieve over his lost mother would be to go to her favorite place in the fucking world and just sit there it's a park it's perfect for him to just go and sit there and reflect

it's a beautiful lake surrounded by trees there is literally no better place in the world to go find yourself than in nature and like not just sitting in a fucking park in a shithole city but like an actual beautiful like yeah it is actual nature it just the whole this is where once again the attention to detail by the team that put this show together makes us not invested in any of these storylines because none of it makes any kind of like logical sense in the brain as we move through these things. Yep. It,

it was, it was an unbelievable scene. Um, it's just, yeah, it floored me. I was like, how then,

then now, like now that I realized it's been, he's been doing this for 10 goddamn years. Yeah. Now I have a little sympathy for Jace because the kid never had a chance. Of course he's sad all the time. Nobody fucking talks to him. Yeah. He's just playing fucking hockey all the time.

Oh my goodness. Anyways. All right. So after that disaster, we get back to the RV. We got a bonfire and we have s'mores and hot dogs. And coach Cole is getting so crazy that he's even thinking about eating a hot dog. And he says, who even puts these things in their body and he's got this very this guy right here that's who does listen i love a

good hot dog but he has got a good point have you seen those things being made oh yeah it's rough it's rough but it is foul i did also when i worked for the baseball team in Indianapolis, I went to, like. That's the only time I eat hot dogs is at, like, a sporting event. Although, I will say, I will. You're grilling out? I usually, if I'm grilling out, I'll do, like, a bratwurst. I'll go fancy with it, you know? Oh, nice.

Okay. Well, young and poor. You know, some Frank's hot dogs, dude? Johnsonville, dude. I like Frank's. Well, for hot dogs dude john johnsonville dude i like franks well for for hot dogs franks is solid yeah but i'm talking bratwurst johnsonville oh yeah i love a good like you know like maybe an apple apple gouda they have john johnsonville has one where it's like it has like little it has like cheese infused into it so like you take a bite and there's like a little cheese like like oozing cheese that's a good one dude i put that in my notes i was like

you know i'm kind of a snob now i only get the fucking fancy ass sausages and like i johnsonville is fine i even sometimes take it like the ones that are you know two to three dollars more than sometimes i really crank it up a notch but what i was going to say is when i worked for the baseball stadium and i was real poor because we were only getting paid six hundred dollars a month um we lived off of free stadium hot dogs and it took me two years to eat one again it took took a long time i had a lot of free hot dogs and there were also like kids games where we'd have to go in at like 6 or 7 a.m. And we were cooking hot dogs from 7 a.m. until noon.

And there's just you don't you don't look at hot dogs the same when you see them cooked and then dumped from a roller into like a can or like a thing of hot water, like in a warmer. It's just, you know, you kind of lose a little juice for them. Yeah. And then, you know, break in the, the third wall of stadiums too. If they got back to backs,

if you're eating those hot dogs at the first part of the game, they're from the day before. Oh yeah. Yeah. If you go, if you get a hot dog from anywhere, I guarantee you it was good. It's from the day before.

Like you go to, you go to a gas station and get a hot dog. That's a day. That's a, that's a, that's probably like a four day before, you know, it's people that eat the food off the gas station.

And rollers are just there. They're, the food off the gas station rollers are just they're they're they have a recklessness to the way that they live their lives that i'll never fully understand i i envy it a little to be like that because i i oh my god i i thought about or like you know what i saw one time too a hot dog from the roller with a soda brought into the bathroom while they used it and then washed their hands and took it back out i was traumatized that was somewhere i was driving i was either somewhere in missouri or tennessee that sounds like it sounds like a missouri thing do you will with that information but yeah it was it was the most fucking disgusting thing no it might have been kansas because it was a casey's and and it was it wasn't a hot dog it

was a piece of casey's breakfast pizza that he sat with his soda on the top of the urinal while he used it and then washed his hands and left i i couldn't i still it's it will that shit like that will haunt you when you see it in real time luckily i haven't i haven't on my many road trips i haven't witnessed uh too many of that i haven't witnessed any of that kind of bathroom stuff dude that guy that guy once again lives his life with a just a imagine malicious recklessness that i'll imagine how strong his immune system is dude dude dude could literally lick the handle of a public toilet and and just be fine after that um so sorry not to get took us took us a little off kilter a couple times oh man this has been a wild episode so far yeah yeah but this is just what because like the way i do my road trips is like i leave at like

2 30 or 3 in the morning. And so then I get like six hours of alone time. And so it's literally just me and truckers on the road. And so when you pop over for a bathroom break at 3.30 or 4 in the morning at like a Love's in the middle of nowhere in Kansas or Missouri, you see some stuff, you know? Not like downtown Seattle, butouri you see some stuff you know not like downtown seattle but you still see some stuff oh downtown seattle dude oh dude i cannot unsee some of the things that i saw on those early morning dog walks dude can't unsee it dude i used to uh um because i had to uh when i was living in seattle i got rid of my car and I was living with, with ramen out in, uh, Leshi.

Um, so I would bus in, in the bus in and bus out. Um, and it was like early morning. It was like, you know, 7am bus rides, not like early, early morning, but like early enough to where you, it's just some characters on the bus. Yeah. You it's, it's still early enough that you kind of get that. I walked. Yeah. Well, you were not too far from the office, right?

You were just up at Cap Hill? No. I was on 7th and James, which I don't know if you remember that area. Which way was James? Was that north or south? North. Okay. North from the office, and it was right by the hospital there,

and we didn't realize it at the time. It was also by a shelter and a food bank and a free clinic, and for fuck's sake, dude. I looked at it. We looked sight unseen. You'll have to send me where you guys were staying, because I looked at it. Before I lucked out with ramen letting me in, I was looking at an apartment right there, right by like a shelter.

It was probably the same one. It was probably the same one. The shelter was on the same – they would line up. So like if you timed your dog walk poorly, you would walk in. You're like right by the highway bridge, right? Yes, yes. And that's where – I guarantee you it was the same one that I looked at. Yes. And that's where I guarantee you is the same one.

Okay. 100% was. That's where they stormed the highway when all the fucking riots and shit were going on. I'm so glad we got out of there when we did. I'm so lucky. That was. Shit got real rough in that neighborhood during the pandemic. We wouldn't have fucking made it.

I probably would have gotten stabbed on a dog walk. Like, honestly, that's not hyperbolebole like that shit was dicey before and then during the pandemic it went yeah that was yeah that was an interesting part of time but yeah i guarantee you i looked at that same apartment no it's cheap but you got what you paid for yeah literally the the first night, first night we moved in there and literally the next Monday we had security 24-7. But the very first night I moved in there, I walked out the front door and I walked along the building to the side door and leaned up against the side door was a dude with a needle hanging out of his arm going into convulsions. And I was just like oh um luckily someone else was there dealing with the realness i was like josie pinch it off let's go come on let's that's gtfo this is not day one stuff that i wanted to deal with yeah yeah you know

such as like i you know i loved seattle though i love seattle love no every day just so goddamn expensive so if if Seattle wasn't so expensive I'd be right back there regardless even with everything that we just talked about I would still go back oh 100% yeah it was I fucking love Seattle I love everything about Seattle it's just yeah yeah it's it's it's it's a travesty kind of like what happened to it, right? Like if it was still affordable and like businesses were downtown, like when it was vibrant and like things were moving, it is just the coolest city to live in. It's fantastic. Yeah. The market, like in all the touristy shit, I loved all the touristy shit.

It was my favorite. It was pretty solid. Yeah. And then all the littley shit. I loved all the touristy shit. It was my favorite. It was pretty solid. Yeah. And then all the little neighborhoods just outside of downtown. Like I was in Leschi with ramen. And I like the little like four block radius of where we were was fucking amazing, dude. And there was a food. Oh, dude, there was a like in where me and Robert were in Leschi. We were just we were like five.

Four or five blocks down the hill from. The lake, Lake Washington. Nice. And so like it's like a it's all it's like a huge neighborhood. But in that neighborhood, there was there was a fantastic brewery. The best pizza shop i've ever been to there was a fucking barbecue joint that was fantastic dude the vegan food in seattle we cannot we'll never find vegan food like that again granted it's a once again it's a complete tragedy

because like none of the restaurants that we loved really made it through the pandemic which is just because they were all downtown you know but like dude there was this and i'm blanking on the place now kelly you probably yell it in the background but dude there was this place that had a vegan menu that fully matched the regular menu so like anything on the regular menu like so she was getting like vegan alfredo if it wasn't for the city walks i would have put on like a thousand pounds in seattle dude i if i wasn't walking miles and miles a day i would have been a thousand pounds that's i miss the seafood so much i love seafood and like that was like my heaven dude i was eating like poke and fucking sushi and shrimp and like clam chowder every goddamn day

seafood in sav Savannah is awesome. So I can't complain there. There's a bunch of shops right over here because I live on the island that have seafood boils to die for. Wait, okay. Hold on. Quick time out. That's like boils, though. I'm not a big fan of the boils.

I like the roast, like the poke and the sushi. Just hand me a fish and let me chomp into it. That's all I need. See, I like the boil. boil i'm gonna peel my shrimp i'm cracking my crab legs and just munching on all that all right let's let's let's rip through the end of this really quick because this is the only part that was worth talking about in the whole fucking episode and we talked about so many other things instead of it so um jace is just stabbing marshmallows and in coob and and fries are sitting next to each other

sorry who did i say was stabbing my phone whatever they're all the same yeah i forget what episode it was but a couple episodes back when you were calling AJ Troy for some reason. I actually was thinking back on one of the episodes I think we just recently recorded. I started calling him Lawrence for just like a half a second, and then you said AJ. I mean, that's his last name. Yeah, I could not remember his first name for the fucking life of me. And so I started calling him Lawrence. Then you said AJ. And I was like, oh, that's right.

That's right. It's AJ. I don't know why I had so much trouble with his name. But all right. So we got a busload of elite Canadian teams arriving, asking for a roster. And the kids are set to decide what happens. And you know what we do, Brandon? We come together. We merge team team we are the dominate ducks i wrote i wrote this down i was like merging the teams is a great

fucking idea because now you'll actually have people on the bench you'll have a full fucking team yeah is that what i put that i was like you can get some real nice tight rotations that's what i that's what i put like it's like instead of having one or two people on your bench yeah like your third line is going to be real solid with that team you know what i mean like where you're not necessarily giving anything up you may not be getting anything but you're not gonna like fall behind yeah the uh the ghost pirates have been having some some hard games recently brandon. I feel you. You hate to see it, but they're. Tell the ads. Everybody's fucking injured.

That's except for my boy. Rantanen. Rantanen. I, you know what else it reminds me of is like Andy from the office. That's how he would say it. Rit to do to do Rantanen. Classic. All right. So long story short um we merge the teams and so it's

getting exciting and all the kids are hanging out and they're like hey let's sing kube alex hits the guitar alex pulls out the guitar that she definitely doesn't know how to play yeah well she's she's been learning to play it throughout the summer brandon they hinted towards that at the beginning oh did they okay that makes yeah don't you remember she was like fiddling with the guitar and then jace walked in and he was like well yeah but i'm sad but she was playing what was she playing she was playing a song i thought i i figured that they're trying to posit the idea that she already knows and has been playing the guitar when I can't. Like suspension of disbelief only goes so far.

There's no goddamn way that the character of Alex Bordo knows how to actually play the guitar. Maybe, Alex, they're trying to like make you think that she didn't always suck. You know what's going to make me not think she sucks? When she pulls out the guitar and starts playing the most depressing song in the world. Yeah. So we have Coob, my favorite. I'm waiting for him to sing all show. And I was disappointed in the selection, too.

He needs a power ballad. He needs like a – Like if we're gonna do if we're gonna do i'm all for doing a stevie nicks song and i love landslide landslide's one of like my all-time favorite beautiful song i love but it's sad as shit it's not a campfire song no it's one that you like sitting alone in your car and you're just running through a slideshow of tragedies that have happened to you you know what landslide You know what landslide is great for? Getting over your dead mom. That's what landslide is great for.

Maybe that's what she was going for. She was like, we can sing and we can heal Jace. We can multitask here. But if you're going to sing a Stevie song at a campfire, go to Edge of 17. The Chain. Yeah. It's just – anyways. But what we do get is Coob's going, and then all of a sudden we hear some beautiful, beautiful harmonizing, and we turn around, and who is it, Brandon?

Why is he coming our what do you think he was like going do you think he was peeing behind the rv and then he just kind of watered back i was wondering what he was doing behind the rv yeah to steal the line from leslie nope he was visiting the whiz palace back there you know so so that's i said that in public one time and kelly looked at me and she was like why do you you, why, why would you say that? The one, the one I always love to throw out that she said, and I forget exactly what it is now or the, the porcelain palace. I got to go visit the porcelain house. Cause then everybody thinks you're doing cocaine.

Cocaine. I mean, little Stevie Nicks. That's literally what I put my notes i was like you know nothing like a it's a real banger um you know brought to you by cocaine yeah it's it's beautiful but like the whole time we've talked about this why did we not get more of this this could have been a beautiful culmination the cherry on top of the the friendship Sunday that is Coob and AJ. Yeah. It could have been.

And it was, and then we get fries coming in with that third harmony. And he stands up for himself. He quits being submissive to AJ and says, my name's Cody. Yeah. Cody. Call me Cody. That's from new girl from new girl what is i forget what name

he's yelling at schmidt toby that's it is toby toby okay be a great great harmony they crush landslide they did a great job brought everybody's mood way down. Killed, killed the vibe. Killed it. Everyone is just crying in each other's shoulders and we leave our bonfire for the end of episode nine. Brandon and my God team Canada has arrived and who steps off the bus?

Somebody with some fantastic flow. He's got the flow going. It is flowing. Blonde waves. It is gently waving in the breeze, and we love it all. And Coach T is back. He turns around. He gets handed the roster list.

And he sees at the top of that list, team captain Evan Morrow. And he goes, you gotta be kidding me. What the fuck is this? I thought I got, this is supposed to be the elite Institute. What the fuck are these assholes doing here i cut this

goddamn kid oh that's great stuff and there you have it coach t is back dude i i they we'll talk about it in the next episode i don't want to give too many spoilers but he's not as nice to canada as he should have been well i mean they have him they have him in winnipeg which you know it has a what's the not to skip ahead it's a thriving arts art scene but it is winnipeg cultural scene driving cultural scene you know the only the only thing i know about winnipeg is that that's where chrisicho's from. Oh, break the wall down! Have you seen that? Have you seen that video clip?

It's one of my favorite things. Because Chris Jericho's like one of my all-time favorite wrestlers. I fucking love Chris Jericho. He's a genius on the mic. Especially his younger days on the mic when Raw is Jericho! And then a couple years ago when he was doing the list I fucking loved that that was so amazing

carrying the clipboard around you just made the list but one of my all time favorite clips of wrestling is it's a Chris Jericho match and he's like it's him and his opponent I forget who it is but they're outside the ring by the fans and somebody in the, in the fans yells at him and he goes,

yells at him and they go, go back to Toronto. And he whips around and he goes, I'm from Winnipeg. You fucking idiot. Would have only been better if he called him a hoser. That would have been good. But that's all I know about winnipeg is that's where is that where robin shibatsky's from too or where she where's from how much she's from vancouver right oh that's right because she's a canucks fan she's a yeah that's right that's right

she's a canucks fan um kelly and i always enjoy um whenever we go to a Ghost Pirates game and I'm getting a little jazzed up for it because I always like it when it gets spicy and my boy Skio is fighting dudes and so I always like to bust out the Robin joke when she's like oh don't make me give you summer teeth

summer here summer there so good alright so let's wrap this up Some are here. Some are there. So good. All right. So let's wrap this up. Well, we are coach T coach. She's here.

He's he's Kumbaya at the campfire. We've combined. We are the dominate ducks now, and we are ready to battle team camp. Thanks for listening, everyone. Please remember to follow and like us on Instagram at TheCakeEatersPod, on Twitter at TheCakeEaters. Also reach out to us via email, TheCakeEatersPod at gmail.com or visit our website, TheCcakeeaterspod.com.