The Cake Eaters - 62. Rookie of the Year

Episode Date: July 18, 2023

On today's episode, Heath and Brandon break down Rookie of the Year. Harry Caray re-joins the podcast to talk about Henry Rowengartner and Ice Cream Trucks. Then the boys talk through the 1993 classic; Brandon gets really romantic about baseball, Heath breaks down his childhood game of German City, they reminisce about how great 90s sports merchandise was, and then Heath starts beef with the Colorado Rockies. Follow us at www.thecakeaterspod.com and on Twitter (@thecakeeaters) and Instagram (@thecakeeaterspod) Email us at [e-mail]

What does possible sound like for your business? It's having to spend to power your scale with no preset spending limit. Redefine possible with Business Platinum. That's the powerful backing of American Express. Terms and conditions apply. Visit amex.ca slash business platinum. It's not worth winning if you can't win. Hi there, KiteCater fans. It's Harry Carrier here. I just got to talk to you about this new great pitcher, Henry Rolling

Gardner. My God, you don't talk about an art. God can throw a baseball to the moon. Freaking love the moon, Brandon, which reminds me of blue cheese. Makes you think about him wings at the baseball park with Henry Rolling Gardner. Fresh from his middle school dance. Henry's over here throwing frozen ropes to the catcher, you know. Rots with popsicles I used to get in middle school myself.

Love me the ice cream truck, you know. Give me a little Ninja Turtle. But that Henry, he's a youngster, but he sure can throw the ball. I imagine Harry Carey was a massive Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle fan. Massive. With the little gumdrop eyeballs on. Yeah. Dude, like, I love the ice cream truck.

When I lived in Houston, I would have a stack of quarters on my table because I had my pool in the backyard. And as soon as that music played around the block, quick sprint to the front yard with a stack of quarters. Pushing kids out of line. Oh, absolutely. with a stack of quarters pushing kids out of line oh absolutely you know what a real grave injustice was to the ice cream truck world was the discontinuation of the choco taco like what a it brought it back recently though i think oh did they because man i because i always started out you know as all ninja turtles spongebob with the bubble gum eyes but you know i really switched over to the choco tacos in the end yeah top notch but anyways um that insane harry carry intro was to bring us

into the movie we're breaking down today brandon which is a classic baseball movie, Rookie of the Year. Amazing. This was, I was telling you offline, this is my movie. I remember, I think I watched this movie more than I watched The Mighty Ducks. It was amazing. I had it on nonstop. And I like how you run straight from his high school dance

and your Harry Carey impersonation. He does not go to his middle school dance. He doesn't go to a middle school dance and your harry carey impersonation he does not go to a middle school dance he doesn't go to a middle school dance in this movie but i do love how he goes to school in the during the day and then will immediately go to wrigley field for the night for the night game yeah like who who who what 12 year old pitcher would not continue to attend middle school at a local Chicago area middle school while being a reliever for the Cubs. Yeah. It just goes to show you to like how simpler the times were at the nineties

where like you could do this and like people would just kind of leave you alone. I wrote that down in my, I wrote that down in my notes, how often these kids are left to their own devices just left alone they go to the they go to the game by themselves they're out mobbing around some dusty old lake by themselves you know i always wondered how that worked in like big cities though because like coming from such a small town it was just so normal for me as a kid as soon as it hit like cognitive function you were turned loose and

you just like me we would just ride our bikes all over town walk we literally played a game at night which like thinking back like on this label but we called it german city and basically we would cut the town into sectors and play hide and go seek after dark not just in like but like through certain sectors of the town um and now looking back at the name i realized how out there really fucking on the nose it is like out there and franking it yeah you know i haven't like thought about us playing that and what we called it since we did it as kids and like wow that's a that's quite it's quite the name for middle school kids to just like yeah let's play some german city and it was just like something we never even thought about. Yeah. Yeah.

That's, that's how it was back in this time though. Cause even, I mean, I don't know about like inner cities. I would imagine inner cities was the same though. Cause I mean the eighties and nineties, nobody gave a shit. Like I, like out in the burbs, we were mobbing around all by ourselves, but like, just like thinking about it from, from today's mindset, that was the first thing that popped in my head. It's like, these kids are just fucking, you know, it know it's uh it's a goddamn miracle they're not getting murdered and kidnapped yeah but like especially especially when he throws the ball back and that group of

like four or five adults try to pick a fight with them yeah but well and i got that as one of my highlights because then his buddy turns to him and he's like yeah they would have kicked your ass undersized middle schoolers yeah that was like a perfect encapsulation of like of just like toxic like old man masculinity where he's like this fucking 12 year old trying to show me up relaxed he just threw the ball you were all screaming at him to throw the ball he threw the ball the um so let's just let's dig into the movie brandon rookie of the year it really is like we we talked about this last time with cn lot but Sandlot, Rookie of the Year, what was the Little Big League, Mighty Ducks? I'm still not sold on Little Big League.

That was never in my rotation. I never had the. Oh, really? I was in on Little Big League. I thought it was super fun. It was an okay movie. Definitely, I really never watched it growing up. I watched it like once or twice, I think.

So I don't have like the connection to it. And like looking back now, like we're watching these, it's definitely not as good as Rookie of the Year or Sandlot. But it was more. It's like a cheer below. Yeah, but like the baseball in Little Big League was like so much more like. Oh, yeah. That's because they had fucking King Griffey Jr.

That's it. Well, and that's why I liked it. Like, I remember I think I said it when we broke it down, but like I own the VHS for that one. So, of course, that was on steady rotation. But I also loved some King Griffey and in the big unit randy johnson and what was is it buehner or buehner's ball dude center field jay buehner he's outfield i think he played all the outfield positions but yeah he was the ball guy and then you had uh edgar martinez at third base slash dh yep yep and um who was their catcher they had a really good catcher too. I forget his name.

I can't remember. The 90s Mariners were on point. Yeah, I loved them. Never won much, but goddamn, if you didn't like the Mariners. They had that one wildcard series in the first round where they beat the Yankees. Watching

that live, and then even when you look back and you watch the tapes and how everybody reacted, it seemed like they won the World Series. That's legitimately what it felt like when they won because they had never won anything. It was the fucking Yankees in the 90s. I remember watching that and it being...

It felt like they won the World Series. Yeah. But as good as Ken Griffey Jr.r is he's no hito you know he does he's no hito that's the the the big revenge of the nerds looking dude from on the mets his name is hito oh is that i didn't even look at his name i just i didn't recognize him from revenge of the nerds isn't well he's not he's he's not program so i i got this so i for the longest time up until

this watch and then about halfway through this watch i thought it was the dude from revenge of the nerds who's also in blood sport um which is a great fucking movie with jean-claude oh yeah oh come on what's the what's the tournament called hold on sorry what's the tournament called yeah oh god damn dude i said i remember watching that movie for the first time like we were in like fourth grade slumber party friends oh older brother rented us all those cool r-rated movies the first time we watched that we were just like oh jean-claude van damme is the fucking most badass person in the world he could murder anyone like oh my god that movie was so good yeah the movie's amazing and awesome

and uh so donald gibb is the name of the name of the actor who plays, he's the revenge and the nerds guy and the dude from blood sport for the longest time. I thought that was him. I thought he, that was the dude who played Hito up until halfway through this watch. And I was like, is that him?

Am I remembering this right? And I looked it up. It's not him. It's Tom Milanovich is the guy who plays Hito. Yeah. So not, not the same guy. What else is he in?

Was I right? Is he in the program? I think the program is Donald Gibb. I think that's it. Okay. Let's see. Damn. But I Googled it.

I Googled Donald Gibb and Tom Milanovich. Yeah. And apparently it's a very common mistake that people mix the two of them up. No shit. Okay. Oh, the program. I don't know. Let's see what else.

Do you remember that movie, though? The program? That was a good one. And Tom Milanovich is no longer with us. Oh, no. This is Andrew program that was a good one and tom milanovich is no longer with us all right oh no that's this is andrew b b r n oski okay yeah tom now tom milanovich was in groundhog day um as well as above the law those are the ones that they say i would know him from he also did stunts in Surviving Christmas. I can tell you. Oh, dude, he was in Hardball.

That's right. He was in Hardball, too, with Keanu. Where Keanu basically plays a Gordon Bombay, but for baseball. Dude, and Baby Spice gets killed. Yeah. That's so fucking sad. Not, what's it? um little i don't know but i can't but anyway tom milanovich is the guy definitely wasn't baby spice but yeah um but tom milanovich not donald gibb which is uh i mean tom tom he does my favorite part of this entire movie i love

all of his scenes he fucking crushes it when he's when he's like when he's grinding the bat and the sawdust comes down you know what i'm talking about and then he's uh what does he do he's um when uh henry does the the what the underhand toss and he's like looking at it and he's sticking his tongue out all crazy he's like licking his tongue out all crazy. He's licking his tongue. Alright, hold on. It was a massive fucking tongue, dude. The ladies probably love him. God damn it, Brandon.

I hate when you do that. You just say stuff that it takes you two seconds to process the weird thing that you said, and I'm like, damn it. And then I forget what i'm was like gonna say to like we haven't even we haven't even started the movie yet yeah it's all your fault all right so i do want to talk about these opening credits because it's a it's a it's a great montage of night not only 90s fashion but also just based like how could you not be romantic

about baseball i could legitimately watch field crews watch field crews get the field ready for hours on end. It is really therapeutic to spend the day at the ballpark. I bet you there's a YouTube video where it's three hours of field crews. I got to find that. That's my and and as we are introducing ourselves to the to the crowd and we're seeing the fashion we get the legend on the color commentary not harry carrey but the one and only john candy and real sorry i'm going to distract this top john candy movie what's your favorite one of all time? Go.

Oh, God. On the spot. That's tough. I'm going to say Rookie of the Year. Okay. I mean, that's surprising. What's his name? What the fuck is his name in this movie? He's got a sick-ass name oh my gosh you're gonna have to imdb because i just i can't help but call him john candy murdoch cliff

murdoch that's what cliff murdoch that is a really good announcer the names the names are so on point in this movie it's unbelievable whoever whoever like wrote this script and was in charge of names, you killed it. A plus. My favorite wrinkle was that the, all this stuff in the box, the press box is always shorting out and falling apart. And so there's always some dude in the background carrying like 18

wires. Oh man. I love that. Like, I don't know why, but that just was cracking me up. And then he kept like, not realizing he's on air great great yes yes that was another really great bit but okay so to answer the question for you because this you said this movie mine is a very close tie it's like

1a 1b of cool runnings and then uncle buck it's it's well it goes solid it they change back and forth i loved uncle buck as a kid but i also thought that macaulay culkin was like peak comedy because we were like the same age yeah see i'm i'm slightly younger than you i just missed like that wave of like um of of john candy and definitely i missed the whole macaulay colkin wave by the time i was cognizant you know he had already he'd already vanished for a little bit yeah so i'm like i like home alone i love but it's i don't have like i don't have the same you know nostalgic connection that you know your your age group has yeah i mean i love it and i i for sure i i was like I missed the John candy wave.

Like I appreciate all of those movies like coming back, but I don't have the, like, I never watched them growing up. It was except for cool runnings, cool runnings and rookie of the year. Yeah. Cool. Cool. Runnings is, is definitely a classic. That's I've been watching like all those movies that like, we used to go rent from Hollywood video on VHS, like Adventures in Babysitting. Heidi was always making us rent that movie, but it's good. It's better than I remembered.

It's insane. Like that movie is fucking insane. Like everyone go watch Adventures in Babysitting and then just be like, how? Like what? Like they, they real quick premise they they are getting chased by the mob because the the weird pervy friend steals a playboy while they're getting their car fixed and the playboy has enough to get them indicted, enough information about their criminal organization to get them indicted for 20 years.

So they are chasing them around the city, putting them in insanely dangerous situations to collect a Playboy, all while the babysitter looks exactly like the centerfold. The 18-year-old babysitter that's still in high school looks exactly like the centerfold and that's like the ongoing joke of this kid's movie so anyways it's it's the most insane shit i've ever seen in a really long time but god i have been having so much fun going back and watching

the movies that do not translate well anymore it's been it's been a blast it's it's like the deep cuts are awesome speaking of this this movie holds up i was waiting it holds up so well i was waiting for like a really inappropriate joke that i didn't remember or something like that um and zero other than other than the when they take him to the the club party that gets a little dicey nothing offensive but it's definitely like that's when i was like heightened and i was waiting i was like oh shit something's gonna happen like he's gonna he's gonna slap some girl's ass or something like that um i've actually got it in here i've got the only time that they pushed the bounds it was when he was changing in the locker room and they made the music sound like players with big dicks and then him with a little dick like

that. Like they, they fully implied that in the locker room that I was like, that's just, I circled it. I was like, that's our nineties. Like I was,

I was doing the same thing as you are. I was like, Oh, that was our one little nineties red flag that every one of these movies has. Yeah. Really good stuff. stuff yeah other than that it held up pretty well and even that that was fine you know that's just that's just locker room shenanigans this is boys being boys he's oh jesus christ this is getting published but

i do want to comment on the 90s fashion quick before we move on from the intro is the florida marlins hat and the crown because we talked about this offline. But like every kid because I was this kid and I had a T-shirt that matched it. I think I got it. It was like a hat. I have a little picture. Yeah, I have a little picture with me with this hat. Yeah.

And every kid had a Florida Marlins hat growing up. You just did. It was it was it was either that. Depending on who you were, if you had any inclination about baseball, you had the teal Marlins hat. Either the all teal or the teal with the black brim. Or if you

were a basketball kid, you had the Charlotte Hornets teal stuff. Everybody had one of the two. I had both. I the florida marlins hat and i had the charlotte hornet starter jacket boom there you go did i like going way way in america money bags over here no my parents that starter that starter jacket's like 110 bucks man we laughed about this when i was back my parents are the most insane like they would wait until they would go just like they were just past like peak and then they would go on clearance and everyone

had already bought their hornet starter jacket so i just would get mine like eight months after they were cool and like really on fire and then i would get it and i'd be like yeah you know it was way in america like we were at least five years behind on all the trends anyways like there was no internet there was way for it to get here it had to travel like you know like the old pony express out to us i forget what episode it is but there's a parks and rec um episode where tom's talking about ponny and how behind the times they are he's like they they just got to the 1990s they're just discovering nirvana he's like i don't want to be there when they find out he dies in 1993.

yes that's that's exactly what it was like but yeah that wasn't always that bad i will say my parents were very like you know kept to themselves so like we weren't fully exposed the 90s fashion though the yeah the marlins hat um everybody walking around with fucking oversized crewneck sweaters um yeah the scrunchies at school the scrunchies out about the scrunchies were status symbols for girls back in the day too like in like the decorations and i remember like heidi i remember the last time i was ever involved with the purchasing of a christmas present for my sister was when it lasted all of like an hour when we got home and there was these really cool scrunchies but like they had like little plastic bears on them and so they were they were super cool and i

was just like heidi got some fucking dope ass christmas presents for you coming in hot scrunchies and my mom was like never again and and still to this day at over 30 years later, not even a sniff of it. Can't be trusted. How could, how could I, I was, you know, if you're going to let it slip at four, how can they trust you at 37? And I can tell you that. And the other thing, the other thing when they're doing this montage, there's so many good montages of them like opening up the stadium. I think they do like two of them because there's one later on where they do the same kind of montage. And they do.

There's like a little split second thing of them stocking the gift shop. Yeah. And dude, 90s gift shops were so much better than like merchandise i think in the in the 90s merchandise hit like its absolute peak because people realized hey we can make so much money off of this nonsense but it was right before like all the algorithms kicked in like now everything's like you know maximized and optimized and fucking like the the merch signs suck now because it's all about who's gonna they're just creating the most boring thing in the world so that everybody would buy it whereas in the 90s you know they didn't have all that information

so they just printed anything they fucking wanted like tasmanian devils fucking dude the tweety bird wearing a fucking Marlins hat and shit like that. Dude, the Looney... Come on. The Looney Tunes crossovers with the sports teams were fucking awesome. Although, you have to admit... They're coming back, though. I've seen quite a bit. That's coming back. Nice.

Oh, no. Yeah, because I saw some with the Looney... Like, homage. Yeah, yeah, yeah. They're real big on that. They've been doing... Yeah, yeah. They do a bunch of cool little crossovers.

Yeah, and they're partnering a lot more with the team, They're real big on that. They've been doing it. They do a bunch of cool little crossovers. Yeah, and they're partnering a lot more with the team, so they're getting a lot more specific, cool stuff. I do have to call out, though, the city unis for the Rockies this year. You know I love those. Well, they're technically from last year. Are they? The license plate ones?

Yeah. Yeah, they unveiled them last year. Oh, they did? Yeah. Oh, well. You got to stay up to date on your Jersey news here. Dude, I do not stay up to date on the Jersey news. But you know what I love is a merchandise store.

God damn it. I am like me. Dude, the 90s, those stores were so much better. Remember the malls in the 90s the 90s those stores were so much space remember like uh like the malls in the 90s remember the disney the disney store in the mall the 90s where it had the mountain of stuffed animals dude how could you not remember that that was always a little too rich for our blood like i said we oh i never i never bought any of those stuffed animals i just would go and play in the little little mountain they had yeah i mean the best knock a couple scars over get the fuck out of here dude the absolute best thing that will

never ever be replicated that kids will always miss that was absolutely peak 90s shopping was the fucking video games in the store playing super mario brothers playing nintendo 64 playing playstation and like having like the little like the little games that were just like the half games kind of like it was just that will never be replicated of going shopping with your parents, walking in the mall and then immediately speed walking to the video game section in Target and then having your parents go shop for two and a half hours and then come back and collect you at the video game station in target and then having your parents go shop for two and a half hours and then come back and collect you at the video game station and target you can still but it was

like chill like i like you would like stranger kid that you had never met before they're like oh hey do you mind if i get a turn because i've been playing for 20 minutes absolutely yeah and then you know what i mean you just rotate out and then you go walk around. And like, if someone like big Mike, just like, Hey, if someone, someone comes and tries to grab you, just start screaming and grab anything you can start hitting them with it.

Done. Great advice. I don't think anybody would ever try to steal you though. You were like, you were like eight feet tall. I was, I did not like, I was,

and I like was like awkward looking to like, it was like, it was not like, like, Oh, look at this handsome little kid. It was like, it's like, that was a strangely proportioned child. Like why are his legs so long? Why are his legs so long? And why has his torso so stubby? Like this is, this is this little baby giraffe needs some stuff walking down like it's i literally look like it was just i was a disaster as a kid that's we let's see okay we aren't even we haven't even talked about the movie no no let's dig into the movie

because like they introduced the team with john candy winning 10 bucks off of his uh off of his buddy because stedman or maybe it wasn't stedman no it wasn't stedman it was the other guy yeah the the dude gets uh taken yard to kick it off and that's how we get introduced into the hapless cubs first pitch of the season home run what a what a fucking what a what a way to kick to the knee that was yeah um and then after we get introduced to the knee that was. Yeah. And then after we get introduced to the team, we get introduced to the kids. Did you recognize the mom from anywhere? Was she in anything?

Her name is Amy Morton. She's in. She is very recognizable. She's in a whole bunch of stuff. I'm trying to think what you. Let me go to the IMDb, figure out what you would... What you would know her from.

Because we get introduced to the kids. She was in Up in the Air. Did you ever see that? What was that about? With George Clooney, and I think Anna Kent, right That's it. She was in an episode of Girls. That was a great show.

Did you ever watch that? No, it wasn't my speed. I got sucked into it. I'm trying to think. Yeah, that's probably all. She's done a bunch of small parts in so many TV shows.

I recognize her from there. Amy Morton. But we're introduced to Henry, the mother, and Henry's two buddies as they're gearing up to go to Henry's game. Real quick, do you recognize... Clark and George, right?

His buddy's name's Clark and George. Clark and George, do you real quick do you recognize clark and george right it's the guys though his buddy's name's clark and george clark and george do you recognize them both of them are in they're not big names but they're in like movies that you may recognize especially the blonde kid i forget which one he is i forget what what he's in uh go go and tell me that's right that's right he's uh one of the camp counselors. And he's the one that used to be there that did snitches on all their hiding spots. Yeah, yeah, yeah. He's the one who just, he was a camper and now he's a counselor. He just turned a counselor.

Exactly. And he was in that bunk. And then the other kid, do you recognize? Fucking snitch, dude. Do you recognize which Hulk Hogan classic? That's a hint. Which Hulk Hogan classic that kid is from? Hulk Hogan? Yeah. No.

Mr. Nanny. Oh, that's right. With Hulk Hogan and the dude from Sanford and Son. God, I fucking love Sanford and Son. I forgot how much I used to watch it as a kid. I forgot about that. Dude, that's my alarm. When I wake up in the morning,

I'm jamming. Henry, George, and Clark. And we're walking to Little League, right? Yep, we're heading to the Little League game, and they're all roasting him because Henry is not good. And she tosses him. You can tell he's not good because he's wearing fucking jeans. He's wearing jeans, and then he's also,

and his Little League team is the Pirates, so that always spells trouble. The Pirates, have they ever been good? Yeah. They were good around this time, too. Oh, because they had young Barry Barnes. Open up a book once in a while, Heath. Learn some history.

I gently followed baseball, Brandon. Leave me alone. If you weren't a 10-gr you weren't i didn't know you but um that but they have some foreshadowing brandon because the mom tosses up the sunscreen over to henry um for for the lob play but he drops it of course um and then and then they go to the game and poor henry gets put into right field well he, he's, he's, he's benched completely. Yeah. And he's normally benched.

He never plays. They're like, why is about his mom's like, why do you care about this? You always just sit on the bench the entire time. Yeah. And he loves baseball. Finally get to play. It's either me or Windermere. And they're like, they're like, he's no, there's no way they're going to play Windermere.

And then it cuts to Windermere and they're like they're like he's no there's no way they're gonna play windermere and then cut to windermere is playing and it's the the nerdiest looking kid in the world he's not wearing jeans though so he's already he's got that one up on on henry yeah but he is having an absolute asthma allergy attack did you hear the coach yelling at him when he goes back to the bench he's like don't give me that asthma shit. That was amazing. Don't give me that fucking asthma excuse. The kids just die in the middle of the outfield. So Henry gets out there and then immediately, boom, crack.

Liner hit right out to him. And not only does he trip and fall fall but he knocks his hat down over his eyes oh wait we forgot to say all while our girl julie the cat is in the stands and that's why we're doing this yeah julie the cat julie julie the cat plays a schoolmate she's in the stands with her scrunchie best friend henry's love interest. They're watching the game. And then the other weird thing that I found is so Clark, all three of them, Clark, George, and Henry, not athletic in the least bit. Henry's at least on the team, though. But Clark and George are the scorekeepers.

They're sitting on top of the scoreboard with chalk right in the score amazing just just you want to talk about some fucking best friends brandon oh dude you're your boys your boys have your back so much that you never play but they still want to accompany you and be a part of do you think Absolutely not. Of course not. Not even like a book? At most, they get a pop and some candy from the concession.

End of game treat? Yeah. Go grab yourself a pop. Grab yourself a candy bar. Move on. Maybe a hot dog if there's some leftovers. Or they're going to throw out the popcorn. Or it's going to be an ice-cold hot dog, probably.

Oh, Jesus, Brandon. Did you try to trigger me? Let me just tell you something here real quick, listeners. I love going to some games and doing live events. And I'm all in on the Rockies, even though they're terrible. Like I actually love that they're terrible because the tickets are so cheap. It's like, hell yeah. Keep being terrible.

That way I can go for cheap and have stuff to do. But for the love of God, I got a goddamn hot pocket of a hot dog. When I went to that game, I'm hungry, got the munchies. And then I bite into my hot dog that is hot on the outside and stone fucking cold on the inside yours was hot on my yours was hot on the outside mine yeah that's what i'm saying it's a hot pocket mine was straight cold just cold all the way yeah those dude fucking rockies rocky dogs do do better and and, I had to send back my chili dog because he literally gave me, like he was trying to hand me this container that was just fucking soup.

And I looked at it and I looked at him. I was like, I'm not touching that. I'm not taking that. I'm not getting fucking scalding hot nacho cheese all over my goddamn hand, dude. Like, what is wrong with you? At least it would have been hot. Jesus. Dude, this fucking soup.

I wouldn't have been able to pick it up. There was no way to actually grab the bun. It was just goddamn soup. Oh, dude. This is Rocky's concessions. Do better. Because that was the most disappointed I've ever been with a concession stand. And that's saying a lot.

Yeah, and I used to work in single-A baseball. At least our fucking hot dogs were warm every time. Even the next day, they were still a little bit warm. Jesus Christ. Dude, that shit. Oh, that shit pisses. You can pay fucking $10 for a hot dog, and it tastes like a fucking Hot Pocket. It's like $6.50.

Okay, that's actually reasonable. Reasonable? Not according to this movie. Remember the scene later on where the owner is like, oh my god, $3.50 for a hot dog? I was like, holy shit, bud. You should saddle up now and pay $20

for a fucking beer. That's the thing I miss most about Atlanta sports is the new football stadium they built. The owner, whenever they built it, I think it was part of them getting public funds, but they had a concession

initiative to where their concession stands prices are dirt cheap. You can get a hot dog. I think the stands prices are like dirt cheap. Like you get a hot dog. I think the hot dog was like two bucks. Dude, you will sell 10 times more. Oh,

I, every, I, I would buy 10 hot. I, every time I went there, I bought like 10 hot dogs just myself. So I got,

you know, it's either $20 for one hot dog or $20 for 10 hot dogs. Oh, here we go. I'm an all 10 brother. Even the beer, even the beer was like super cheap i think it was like four bucks for a beer yeah not super cheap but still you know it was like that that stadium they had it they they know what they're doing there they had it they had it down

right let's and it's just and it's just fucking gorgeous too this is this is how bad the fucking rocky's dog experience was brandon the savannah bananas and when you buy a ticket there you get a part of your ticket is like there's a section of like an assembly line of free concession food like a bottomless like a fucking buffet of hot dogs hamburgers and like the little cisco i don't know if i would rest sandwiches i don't know if i'd want to go through a buffet in a baseball stadium though but like dude it's basically the same as rocky dog like you just had like i had two hot dogs two hamburgers and a chicken sandwich like and you get fries and chips but like i'm not worried about that i'm worried about grubby little hands touching everything no no they're wrapped in

tinfoil like they're all wrapped up so you just assemble it's gonna you think that's gonna stop a little four-year-old opening it up getting his hands all in it and then his mom goes no no no no no put that back wraps it up and puts it back in that never happened but you know what I guarantee you that happens eight million times a day I

see that should happen at the fucking fucking target every day I licked at least four of them but no what i was trying to say was that all of those buffet fucking hot dogs sitting in tinfoil in the warmer were all hotter than than the goddamn rocky dog i honestly don't know how they got it that cold. I don't like they that was some like that took a concerted effort to get like flash boiled

them or something. Let's just flash boil these. They won't fucking know they're there. Yeah, it came prepackaged already cooked, right? You know, I hope the rise is make sure to cut this on tick tock and tag the Rockies in it.

Let's get some fucking free tickets, man. Cause I'm in, I'm all in on the Rockies. I just want warmer hot dogs, man. And that's not too much to ask because I want a hot, hot dog with my tall ice cold Rocky mountain water. That's fucking baseball, brother. Speaking of baseball, let's get back. We still have not talked about this movie. All right. So let's, let's get back. We should not talk about this movie at all.

All right. So let's dig in. And basically, we get Henry. He throws the ball the wrong way after the game. Yeah. Like you said, he misses the pop-up. He knocks his hat down so he can't see. So it takes him 30 minutes to find the ball. Then he

finds the ball and does not proceed to fix his hat. So he can't see where he's throwing and he ends up chucking it. Spins and throws it the wrong way. And his buddies are like, is that even legal? Which I mean, yeah, it's not illegal.

Ground rule double, right? Well, it would depend on where the runner was at the moment because he would get a free advance. Yeah. Everybody advanced. But anyways, long story short. How long it took him to find the ball. That kid's already at second base.

Yeah. I mean, it really set up Henry as a disaster because we go to school. Just a buffoon. Yeah. And they go to school the next day and everybody's making over the jeans. The fucking jeans. They at least throw sweatpants on or something, you know, jeans. But they get to school, Brandon, because this is the key point right here. You know, he's trying to impress Julie the cat.

And the kid is like, hey, Rowan Gartner, go long. Oh, you're missing. What did I miss? Because he goes back to the school after. I think, yeah, he goes back to the school. You're missing my favorite part, though, is when they're at the cafeteria. And Clark and George are like trying to hype them up about Julia. Oh,

to go talk to Julie. Yeah. And they're like, go talk to him, go talk to him. And Henry goes, what the heck would I even talk about? And Clark chimes in with talk about the boat.

Oh, yeah. Talk about our, talk about our sick ass boat, dude. Yeah. Which is like great, great advice.

Whenever you need something to talk about with the ladies, talk about, bring up, dude. Yeah. Which is great advice. Whenever you need something to talk about with the ladies, bring up a boat. Yeah, if you have a boat, that's a home run right there. That's a done deal. But I wrote that down. And then there's another line that I see. There's another

great one-liner that George has because I forget how it comes up but oh it's because julie julie's friend no julie the cat's drinking milk right and george goes he goes he turns to henry and he goes milk's done that body good that's right i'm pretty sure i'm pretty sure in the same scene george called this this is this I got a little bit worried is this line when he says, Nugget's the body good. And then he calls – he refers to Julie the cat as stacked.

Yes, yes. At that point, I was like, okay, we might be in for an inappropriate scene here. We're towing the line. We are inching real close. But that cap is great, though. Talk about the boat. It fucking cracked me up, dude. And we get to

meet, what's her name? What's her name? No, it's not Tiffany, but Clark's girl. You know who I'm talking about? Yeah, I can't remember. My note-taking was She's just like a she's just like a girl version of clark fucking they were adorable together cutest couple yeah yeah that was um it was absolutely spectacular but then we get she she she has a great line too when

when uh henry's uh henry's like i don't think she even likes me like she doesn't even know exists and clark's girl is like i heard from somebody who heard from somebody who heard from somebody that says she thinks you're not ugly or something like that. So you're saying there's a chance. All right. So anyways, after we get done eating, it's always recess, right? Before we get back to class and we got the baseball team. I miss recess, dude. Structured

outdoor time? You're really taking this off the rails. Me? You spent 80 minutes on a hot dog. Okay, well. Just go ahead. We're at recess. Me spitting venom towards the rockies is different

because i love them but it's it's feedback it's constructive criticism you know so anyways we're outside we're going to recess henry's like dude i gotta make up for the shenanigans from yesterday i'm gonna catch this pop fly ball well because the it's it's it's the dude who's on his team yeah he's razzing him yeah he's being a fucking dick and being a bully and he's like oh henry fucking sucks yeah which he did like it's like you know like this is yeah and then he i'm not trying to justify bullying brandon but this is why kids are so fucking weak now because like he sucks. And like that throwing into the, over the fence the wrong way that can not go on unpunished. You know what I mean? Like he needs to,

he needs to make sure that it's like, Hey dude, either quit or just like go fucking hide in a hole. Cause he sucks. But anyways, but so, so the, in,

in bullying Henry, the kid is trying to get one up on him again. And he's got, of course he's got a baseball bat at school, just carrying around a baseball bat. Yeah. The 90s, dude. Yeah. And the pop fly ball, Henry goes for it, but there's a baseball in the middle of the outfield.

He slips. He goes flying up in the air. He comes down on the arm. And what a break. Dude, the scene the first of all this movie is the absolute like a plus top notch crowning achievement in cinematic history for slow motion that slow motion arm break was amazing the amount of times they do slow-mo in this movie and it's perfect every single time it's amazing the slow motion arm break and then after he the

part that i like is the montage post arm break with his arm stuck up in like all the different ways that like people interact with them from like the class with their hands up to everyone just being like hi henry the baseball the baseball team's making fun of him. Oh, my gosh. I loved everything about that really quick montage of him having the cast up. And then this is one of my favorite parts of the movie as a kid, when the cast comes off. Because this is where we got a catchphrase from my early childhood, where we're at the doctors and we've got tendons that have fused with the humorous no this made no sense at all granted i'm not a doctor he's it didn't make sense i've gone on record on this podcast i'm not a doctor but yeah none of this none of this made any sense but those tendons are locked and loaded and we hear as he's testing it as it starts to creep back and then the sound effects

are top-notch too the the creek back and then he whips it forward and he smashes that doctor's nose and what do we get brandon we get the quote of imagine they funky butt-loving imagine being like a a pediatrician or you know a doctor that works primarily with kids and trying to yeah trying to find a a suitable exclamation it'd be rough oh and my favorite part and you can tell him because he said that he said that that was like an immediate reaction. That dude has said that before. That's his catchphrase. And my favorite part is the mom is just like,

we're so sorry. And they all just like bolt out. He's like, just go, go away. And then he's like, wait, shit.

I have to do my job. I will see you in three weeks. Oh, I love that. love that was that was amazing and then what do we get in celebration brain and we get some cubs tickets for did you henry and the boys do you remember the scene do you remember the scene where she gives them the tickets yes they're running the wrong way down the escalator and they're running down the up escalator just like the 90s man like what are those kids they would never put that in a movie now because they would have to put like six warnings yeah please do not try this at home you're all idiots and then they go to the game all by themselves all by themselves day game in chicago taking the bus by themselves in downtown

chicago no big deal definitely could do that shit now like it's way too dangerous there well in Chicago, taking the bus by themselves in downtown Chicago. No big deal. Definitely couldn't do that shit now. It's way too dangerous there. Well, I mean, it's Wrigley Field. It's north side. It's not that rough. Not terrible.

They'd be fine. But as we get to the Cubs game, we figure out that they are going to have to forfeit the franchise if they don't sell out all the games. That line, A, didn't make any sense. Because they never went back to it. Honestly, they never came back to it. I feel like they didn't need that line there. They just needed the

tuggle or the tussle between the old man and the son-in-law, or was it son? I forget how they were related. Something like nephew, son-in-law, something like that. I forget how they were related. Something like nephew, son-in-law, something like that. I think it was nephew. I think you're right. By the way,

the dude who plays the nephew is Dan Hedaya. He's in so much stuff. A billion things. Did you recognize the owner? Speaking of Home Alone. Home Alone 2. What's his name? I forget. much stuff a billion things did you recognize the owner speaking of home alone yeah i'm alone too well what's his name i forget but dude but uh toy store owner from home alone too yeah

anytime anytime 100 of the time that dan hidea is in a movie he's a bad guy he's always a bad guy yeah so anytime you see him pop up in a movie you're suspicious alerts should be going off. How's this guy going to fuck it up? But what we get when we, after we get introduced to our front office, Brandon is we get introduced to Henry's encouragement of Stedman. We got fucking Stedman on the mound boys,

and we need him to throw the cheese. Throw him the high, stinky Limburger. And then we're all chanting, rock it, rock it. And it's so empty in the stands. See, the best part, they're in center field. Stedman's on the pitching mound, and there's so few people at the stadium that he can hear them perfectly clear it's it's just it's amazing amazing stuff and then what happens boom just homer to the outfield and we get brandon's boys uh out there drinking beer in the middle of

the day and just you know they throw it back throw it, and he can't even get it over the outfield wall. Embarrassing. What a disaster. People, if you're ever in that situation where you're in the outfield and you're going to throw it back, I don't think they even let you do that anymore. No. anymore no um but the key to that scenario is to where you're trying not to look as least if you if you don't have any throwing ability and you're trying to look the least stupid you sky that throw it as high as you can that way it'll go it'll arc over yeah he he did like a line drive which was that was terrible it's uh yeah anyways um but then what happens right after that disaster our boy stedman gives

up back to back so that's a rough look for for him he was he was struggling with the have tos right there you know yeah and this time is it george that gets it blonkin i keep yeah yeah yeah george runs runs it down and then he he freaks out he's like, wait, this is on cable television. WGN, motherfucker. That shit's nationwide. I used to watch that shit in Colorado. That's the same in Nebraska. That's how all the Bulls game, every Bulls

game. That's why the Jordan Bulls were so popular, right? Not only did they have the greatest player ever, but it was very, very easy to watch them. Same with the cubs the cubs like midwest domination is all because of that even the braves tbs braves on tbs that's how that's how i because i'm a braves fan and that's why that's the only reason why is because they were on tbs all the time yeah watching chipper jones greg maddox those are great yeah chipper come. Come on, dude. Chipper is the fucking best.

But after that, Homer George stops, hands it to Henry, the athlete of the group. So he was just to confirm George was scared to look bad throwing it, right? Yes. And then

Clark was like, I'm not fucking doing it. Yeah. Cool. Yeah. Clark says Clark specifically bad throwing it right yes and then clark was like i'm not fucking doing it yeah cool yeah clark says clark specifically doesn't do it because he's he can't throw it he's like i don't want to look like what he what does he say i don't want to look like a loop he said something where i don't want to look like a loser um george i was a little confused on if he was like oh shit i don't want to be on tv because like i'm supposed to be at school or no it was just because he didn't want to throw it terribly. Okay. Yeah.

He was like, I can't do this. Gotcha. And Henry's like, I just two days ago. Actually, not two days ago. It would have been because there's a big time jump. We're in August now after he got his cast off. But so four months ago, he fucking rocketed that shit all the way over one fence on a little league

dude he can throw the ball he knows he can throw it yeah but this time we hear that arm come back and creep rips a frozen rope to the catcher and almost throws the runner out well let's say i had i had an issue with that i had an issue with. He throws it all the way back to the catcher. And then the catcher tries to tag that because it's right as the dude who hit the home runs get into home plate. Yeah. He tries to tag him out. It's already a dead ball. It's been home run.

Yeah. But then we get back to what's his face. He's like, give me that kid or give me that person because he doesn't realize it's a kid but then that's when the the old dudes are like are you trying to show me up you old whippersnapper and then they start chasing them and the kids take off and so they're trying to find it and that's where the guy's like hey hey, man, it is not a dude. It is a child. It is a 12-year-old little boy. He's like, whatever, Trevor.

Even better. Let's get that pup out here and dollar signs. Dollar it up. I looked into this because I was like 12 years old, Major League Baseball. Wait, hold on. He says, Durkin, bring me that arm. 12 years old major league baseball

i was looking it up um to see if there was some kind of now granted i didn't look up 1993 rules which i imagine there probably wasn't i imagine in 1993 a 12 year old could have played major league baseball like within the rules speaking you know obviously talent wise it's not gonna work out but i looked into it so as of right now uh with our current the current rule book as it's stated if you are if you have participated in in uh like an american high school baseball team team or a travel team of the same – it's not AAU ball for baseball, but I forget what they call it. But that higher echelon, if you've competed for a high school or those upper echelon travel teams, you are not allowed to enter the MLB draft until you're, until you graduated, you have to have graduated. So,

I mean, if you graduate by 12, you're in, you're good. But so it's like 17 is like the age, pretty much the age gap. Cause you have, you have to have graduated high school.

If you're an international player that has never played for any of the American stuff like the high school or a travel ball, if you're strictly an international person, you can be signed at 16. Interesting. Interesting. But again, that's today's rules. I don't know about 90. I feel like 93 was probably the Wild West, and they would have let anything go. Yeah. This is a year before the strike.

So we're talking real wild, wild, wild West. We need some Ash coming in because they don't just sign him out right, though, Brandon. They get him in for a tryout because during the tryout, that's where they're like look at this golden goose and he's hitting 101 103 which is like today a lot of pitchers hit now they don't want they don't no you break 100 that's special nice well that's what he's doing especially baby that's like this isn't a louise thing where you know he's fast for his age. He's throwing 101, 103. This is legit. 101, 103.

If you're breaking 100 at 12, or if you're breaking 100 at 21, that's special. Especially if you can do it consistently. Yeah. And this is where we get introduced to, not to Jack act but introduced to jack as he is going to be henry's manager and getting that we missed we missed the day cut we forgot the awkward date where while we're here i want to touch on jack because i have a jack jack and then we'll try and like rip through the right now that he's signed now that he's on the Cubs, we'll try and rip through this because it's been an hour, Brandon. This is too long.

But Jack's a goddamn fucking maniac, okay? A, the shirts he's wearing are fantastic. They're like ugly sweater designs but on button-up t-shirts, like dress t-shirts. Fantastic. And then the dude for that awkward date, the dude doesn't knock. The dude just fucking barges right in to the house. Yeah. And she said, well, it was a third date.

Is that what she said? I think she says it's like a third date, right? Something like that. He was, but just barging it, dude. I don't care if I'm, I, if we've been dating for like a year and a half, if I come to your house, I'm knocking on the door. I'm not just fucking barging in you're like even even like like so i think about like going over to like phil's who is like going to my buddy's house back in wayne i still knock on the door as i'm like i knock on the door and then i walk in i'll say i don't i don't walk in at all i'm a knock and i'll

wait unless you got it. Unless you, unless you text me, like, come on in. If you text me, come on in. Then I'm, I'm good. But I know like, if I show up without that, like, come on in confirmation, I'm knocking or I'm ringing the doorbell and I'm staying put till you open the door because I, it's just such a, you don't just barge in. You text before it's like, Hey, I'm coming over. And it's like, yeah, cool. And then you just give them a little courtesy knock as you in you text before it's like hey i'm coming over

it's like yeah cool and then you just give them a little courtesy knock as you walk in because like cool be there in five no unless you specifically tell me to come on in i'm i'm not i'm not coming in until you open the door that's i don't think that's that's barbarian behavior is what that is i think back in my childhood and i'm not sure if my friends ever even thought about you know like you know announcing themselves at point of entry like it was just in turnstile like people just came in constantly well i get it maybe get a call on the landline like we're on our way cool sometimes they would actually like i didn't even realize people were over at my house like i'd just be downstairs playing playstation and like i there'd be like five people up just chit-chatting with my parents and then they'd come down they're like oh hey i'm like oh hey did you just get here

i'm like no we've been here for like 30 minutes we're just chatting with big mike and and mamadi but anyways all right let's rip through this because he wait wait no i got so i have sorry oh jack go off besides besides him just fucking walking in wait did you see his car sorry yeah i have i have oh okay look at his fucking bullshit car in my nose yeah it's too small for him because he just wanted a fucking convertible for status and he doesn't know how to drive it either when he doesn't put it in park when the coach gets there to pick up henry for the tryout and he pulls up the jack pulls up late in his fucking bullshit car and he falls out yes amazing because he's too big for it yeah it's no it's too small for him that's all yeah he is too big for the car yeah and then and then there's the awkward day after he barges in.

He gives her a necklace, and then he goes for the weird, awkward neck kiss, and she backs away. Oh, it's terrible. It's weird. In front of Henry, too? Awkward. Oh, yeah. And then there's later on, I think once he signed, he's talking to the mom and they're like eating chips and he's holding a chip and he goes,

cheers with a, with a chip. He says, cheers with a chip. What the fuck is that about? Have you never cheers the nacho? You've never, never eaten nachos.

Truly nachos brother. Between your cheersing with chips and walking in on people. He's your, your, your, your, you're turning into a real Jack. You know what? between your cheersing with chips and walking in on people he's you're you're you're you're turning into a real jack you know what it's not walking in brandon like you like if because right my friends did the same thing like right it's like heath i'm coming to pick you up in 10 minutes but like if i don't walk out like he'll walk in and just to come chit chat with my parents you know he doesn't knock you just knock oh right i'll just come in that's what i'm trying to say like people don't knock at my parents house like my friends have

even to this day even though we have not lived there in 20 years my parents my friends still do not knock at my parents house they just come in unbelievable if i was mama d i'd be slapping people are you kidding me she fucking like every day that goes by that like i have left home and there's not a constant does she not lock them in does she not lock the door not during the day oh my god not lock the door? Not during the day. Oh my God. Not during the day. It's way. Not if you're home. It's exactly how fucking horror movies start. Always man.

Always lock your fucking door. Okay. Brandon, can we move on? Let's start talking about Henry is on the Cubs. Let's get in this. Cause we haven't even talked about. I got two.

I got two. Keep talking about Jack. Sorry. I got two Jack lines before we go. And both of them are at the at the end when he's getting fired and it's blowing up so skipping ahead but the lines are uh uh fucking henry goes you're not my real dad and he responds with the greatest fucking response for that thing i've ever heard. He goes, your mother probably

doesn't even know who your father is. Yeah. Which is like amazing. Like what a fuck. Like to a 12 year old. What a fucking ballsy fucking shot. Not only to a 12 year old, to a 12 year old is paying your fucking rent, bro. And then he goes, put him in line

and then his mom comes down and starts beating the shit out of him and he's he's i forget exactly what he says but he screams something along the lines of of i did all this work for henry he's half mine it's like what are you talking about i own him uh that's good jack jack's a goddamn but that's how it turns into right like that's like macaulay colkin's parents did the exact same shit oh that's why all those hollywood kids you know they end up you know going independent okay jack was a goddamn menace all All right. So we get to Henry. He's on the Cubs. And I like this fun wrinkle.

Did you notice like when he very first goes to the arena and knocks on the door? That's a nod to the Wizard of Oz. Yeah. I thought that was fun. I love that scene. That's amazing. We haven't mentioned Gary Busey. Yeah.

Dude, Gary Busey in. Dude, Gary Busey in his prime though like with the stash. Yeah, that's my favorite Gary Busey role will forever and always be black sheep. No, no, dude. The best Gary Busey role is point break.

Well, Utah give me two. That's Black Sheep Come on man Black Sheep's solid too I Point Break's Point Break's my like

Number one movie of all time though I fucking love Point Break But yeah Gary Prime Gary Busey This is before I mean he was always crazy But this is before he really

Started showing it Yeah Yeah And And he He crushes this role too dude he does amazing and we also get introduced to the first basement aka the janitor from scrubs one of the best sitcoms ever that's my number one favorite tv show of all time scrubs oh i know i brought it up when

when we were talking about um Murdoch, but the names in this, especially the baseball player names. I mean, Henry Rowan Gardner, great fucking name. And the coach always getting his name wrong is amazing, too. Until the end. And he's like, what did he call him?

That was amazing. This movie is so good. It really is. He has so many good names instead of Rowan Gardner for Colleen Henry. Cliff Murdoch is

a great name. I forget if it's the first basement or not, but one of the Cubs names is Billy Frick, which is a great, great fucking name. And then you got Chet Stedman, the Rocket, Phil Brickma, which is the pitching coach guy.

And then Oki, isn't that the first baseman? Is that his actor name? Yeah, I think that's his baseball name. That's a great name too, Stan Oki. Yeah. I was sorry. I wonder who's his baseball name. That's a great name, too. Stan Oki? Yeah. Yeah. I was sorry. I wonder who Billy Frick is.

It was, they were calling out the lineup, and they were like, Billy Frick. And I was like, that's a great goddamn name. And then the Revenge of the Nerds dude's name, Hedo, which is a great fucking, especially for a villain, great villain name. But the name's top notch. Top notch, dude. name but the name's top notch top notch dude uh this and um and this is where we get introduced to phil brickma the pitching coach um and my favorite is we get introduced to him putting in the biggest fucking thing of cha like this oh my god just has them and is choking on eating sunflower seeds with, like, his, like, I don't even know how to describe how big that clump of jaw is. And, like, that is just going back to the 90s, too.

Because, like, Sandlot, right? Like, when they put the big jaw in, like, dude, never done a lipper. And now it's, like, now it's pansies the way they do it. It's just zinners, right? Yeah now it's like now it's pansies the way they do it it's just zinners right little zin pouches little fucking gen z pussies yeah little zin dynasty

for those little gen zinners I went to a I went to a like a family graduation like my second cousin I don't know what their there's a family graduation. My second cousin. I don't know what's there. There was a family graduation party the other day.

And my uncle. He was a big. He used to do chew all the time. But he's like a mechanic. He's a big burly man's man. And he was doing fucking zinners at the table. And fucking cracked me up. Yeah.

That's what the kids are doing man that's it um all right so after uh and then after we get changed um with that because this is after we get introduced to brickman that's when it's like the music of the changing scene and he waits for everyone to leave because he's like i don't want to do this in front of grown men um and then we he's a he's a grower not a shower he yeah jesus christ and then and then we get um brickma on the on the bench yelling to give him the high stinky cheddar um but we clean his nose i think that's later on but that's a great one too or he goes uh my favorite is he's like screaming and he goes let the big dog eat yeah that comes that comes later brandon quit quit jumping ahead um the one-liners are too good not to mention

right away though they're so good but we get just wait till we get to hito hito's got the best one-liners dude well it's coming up here in a second because we get we get Stedman gets the hook and Brickma is starting to do the signal. But then a bug comes in and he starts to, like, fight with the bug with his hat. And Henry's like, what's what's that mean? He's like, you're going in, kid. So I always thought I thought i i think that i don't think there was a bug i think that was just that was the signal oh that was the signal it looked like the bug to me oh it's really good stuff i i could you could with brickma you could

convince me either way either that was the actual sign or there was a bug either one was is 100 believable oh the crowd the crowd's chanting Henry Henry and this is where your boy comes up and he absolutely smashes a home run and he says I eat fastballs for breakfast

is this the one yeah this is the one where he well yeah this is where he comes up to the plate and he's right before the first pitch he's like staring he's like screaming at henry and he's like where's your mama this one's for mama and then he uh he smacked yeah he smacked the home run and he as he's leaving the batter's box he goes read him in a week kid and then he starts doing the crying oh my god after he rounds first he's like whoa crying to your mommy it's your mommy uh and that's as he crosses home home plate

he's like i eat fastballs for breakfast kid classic stuff he does the fucking man speaking so speaking to names it what do you how do you feel about when i when i eventually have a child how do you feel about the name hito rambo axelson sounds like a mouthful but i love it i love it i love it i'll all in but anyway so we end up henry actually ends up getting the save because he gets a wild pitch and a hit by pitch but they throw the dude out at third for the final out of the game in the end i forget how they do the other one and so did he get a double play i think you got a double play maybe that's maybe that was it there's one where he like throws it and the dude hits it and he freaks out, but it's just like a ground ball.

That's later. I've got that coming up. That's later. But that's where they beat the Mets, and this is where we get post game. We get Brickma with the best advice to Henry in the post game. Are you ready for it, Brandon? Let's hear it.

It says the key to being a big league pitchers, the three R's readiness, recuperation, and conditioning. You see after the game, a lot of guys like to ice their arm. Still other fellows think that heat is the way to go, but I've discovered the secret. Henry hot ice, hot ice. I heat heat up the ice cubes it's the best of both worlds so so good there's there's nothing bad about that 10 seconds of it's so good he there's nothing bad the everything that dude says in this movie is top-notch did not have

been better Daniels Daniel Stern's the guy who plays brick ma and he's from Home Alone yeah he's the he plays Marvin Home Alone he's also in City Slickers he was in like every single

movie during like the late 80s he's also in city slickers he was in like every single um movie during like the late 80s he's uh great character actor hilarious great physical comedy like when he gets stuck in the hotel let me let me rip through these next few things because after the hot ice we get this is where we get the julie the cat is like yo henry comes in at me at the lunch table um and and that's where he's like dude talk about the boat ask her to go for a ride and then roger's hitting on the fret the tiffany the friend um and then he's like no ask her when the boat's finished um and so then we cut back to the to wrrigley field and we have our boy Brickma doing some batting practice and he keeps popping them up and hitting them into his head.

And this is where you get your favorite line and he's sitting in the batter's box and he goes, look, the big dog. Yeah, that's where it is. And he keeps popping it up and it hits him in the head. Classic. This is also really good where Henry comes in because he's a little late and he's like, you're practicing with Stedman today. Also, you're fined $500 for being late.

He's like, $500? That'll take me five years. Or that's six years allowance. That's what he says. And this, so then they do the practice and whatever it's fine you know um then they cut to the game this is when Stedman starts taking him under his wing yes yes and like they're just they're just doing some practice and then it cuts to the game and he goes in there and he's kind of doing some some wild stuff again he's like go talk to him and this is where Stedman

gives him some solid advice brandon he says do you have do you have the whole thing not the whole thing he says um he says you got to use your have to you know your have to that's uh and and and he walks away and he's like what the heck was i talking about you're missing the the the best part is the have to, the have to is, is, uh, what's he say? It's like in between the fear and the, it basically just says like,

when you get scared, you got to tap into your have tos. You got to tap into your have tos. Yeah. And then whenever you get scared, you got to use your have to. He walks away and it's a, it's a good like 20 seconds of 20 seconds of him just spilling

nonsense and then he leaves and he says to himself he goes i don't know what the fuck what the heck was i talking about and then it cuts to henry and henry is like i don't know what the fuck he was saying what the heck was he talking about then he gets back to the bench into the coaches coach goes what'd you say to him you wouldn't get it you wouldn't yeah yeah he's he's like what the heck was he talking about he's like would you tell him you wouldn't get it you wouldn't yeah yeah he's he's like what the heck was he talking about he's like would you tell him you wouldn't understand and this is where um he throws the pitch and it gets hit and he covers his uh head with his okay um but the janitor um they get a double play and the janitor gives him his ball back and he's like great job kid um and then

they go and it's like uh john kenny's like one out away from back-to-back saves. And then, come on, Hank, cut some cheese. Cut some big stinky cheese. And this is where he hits strike one for the first time in his career. Strike two knocks the catcher back on his buttocks, Brandon. Strike three. And this is where your boy Brickma is like, clean his nose. And then boom, strike three.

And they're celebrating that first strikeout, Brandon. Wow. Amazing. And I'm cutting through some stuff too. Because then go through the road trip really quick this is where the mom this is once again we get another prelude mom throws up under us but this time we get a catch um but uh my favorite is uh your boy brickma again and he is talking to he first henry first sits next to brick man

um and he says hold on he says uh he's giving him advice and he says uh i wrap the cake in my vomit bag and voila breakfast and then he's he's talking about all the free food he steals yeah yeah um and he's trying to set henry up for success and then he says conservation managing resources that's the key to baseball yep conservation i wrote that down conservation it's all about conservation oh man that's and then this is good and then uh that's when stedman calls him over and he's like best salisbury steak i've ever had on an airplane i call bullshit on that hey henry there's the right thing and got chicken tenders but also where's he getting chicken tenders from on a plane they got a fryer back there

yeah it's all pre-fried um but there's there's no such thing as a good salisbury steak so even the best one in your life i call bullshit on that anyway so then they they get it kicked off but that's when they uh realize that uh brickma and Henry, they are roomies as they share. Adjoined rooms. Yeah. Yeah. Adjoined rooms. Adjoined rooms, my bad.

Yeah. And did you recognize the bellboy? He's one of the husbands from Cougar Town. Yeah. He's in a bunch of stuff. Yeah. Yeah. I was like, oh, Cougar Town.

He's just fucking smiling the whole time at brickman he's just oh that door creepy creepy hospitality smile uh the door keeps closing and then which so i i had i remember having real beef with this um as a kid growing up like the why why are we stuck in between the two doors why are we leaving that why hey why are there two doors you just need one door right there but this is so good and then he gets so henry closes his door and then he gets closed in his door and he is stuck between the two rooms and henry has just left yeah There is, there is no one there to let him out. And he, so my,

my question is, cause this is the road. He's stuck in there for the whole game. I don't think he gets left there. I just, cause I, well, no,

he doesn't, he doesn't get left there. My thought is, is he there for more? It's just one day that he's there. I was thinking that maybe that was the first game and he was there for, he's stuck in there for that maybe that was the first game and he was there for he's stuck in there for three days like all no because henry would go back to the room that's true but they

the way they showed it though they showed a maid letting him out so i'm assuming like later on that day like the maid came to like tidy up and yeah that's best case scenario yeah but i i just imagined him there for like three straight days just but this is this is uh right after that henry gets his first at bat which is the best part of the whole road trip in my opinion which is um in insane a they never showed him taking batting practice never never they never they never even showed him hitting in little league let alone yeah and my favorite thing is like all right you're going in and then he's like stay low and uh don't get killed yeah stay low and then he's he steps into the box at the farthest top right corner the The farthest back right corner, barely in there, just going, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God.

And then his mom going, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God. She's listening to it on the radio. It's fantastic. How that pitcher didn't throw, didn't strike him out, though, is beyond me. And then the fourth ball, he swings. He swings after. There's still a strike zone I side with the pitcher on that where when he's screaming at the ump and he's like

just because he's fucking three feet tall doesn't mean there's no strike zone like come on um my if you throw it right down the middle I don't like legitimately right down the middle right in like the sweets like the what normally would be somebody's

midsection. I don't care if that's above his head. That's a fucking strike. Listen, Brandon, number one, you're wrong. Number two, he gets walked. And that's all that matters. He swings at the last one, too. He swings so late, Brandon. The ump has already called the walk

and pointed it into first base. Then he should have been called out. He should have been called out on unsportsmanlike conduct for swinging a bat for no reason. And anyways, you know what I was thinking this entire watching this entire movie? Yeah. Where's the pitch clock? They needed the pitch clock, but they there's so much. So much stuff goes on in between pitches

and you this is my favorite because he gets like they could never they could never make a movie like this ever again with the pitch clock it's just it rules it all all impossible it's all it's all done but this is my favorite where he starts talking shit to the pitcher on first base and he's like hey got something hanging out of your nose and and he overthrows him so he gets to second and that's when he kicks in with like everyone said this like we all said this at practice this got banned multiple times in little league practice how do you ban something multiple times but you just ban it once well it got unbanned when pitchers got a big butt pitchers got a big butt you know new year new coach new champ and uh get banned all over again but um it's uh pitchers got a big butt is classic smack talk we get another the pitcher did have a

big butt though that's for sure yeah andy the the pitcher for the daughters in the scene is easily like 65 years old oh right amazing so old but but just when you think the trash talk can't get any better brandon we get we want a pitcher not an underwear snitcher. I still don't know. To this day, I still don't know what that means. Brandon, you know why? Because you're a fucking underwear snitcher, dude. Let's just

skip ahead, Brandon, because we've taken wildly too long. I got two things I want to point out. One, for the road trip, all the airport scenes are fantastic when they're running through the fucking airport. And then they get in the limo, and Henry is trying to wheel and deal a little love connection between Chet and his mom. Oh, pimping out his mom. Very Charlie move.

Very Charlie move. And he goes, let me make you guys a drink. And I couldn't tell if he actually made like a cocktail or if he just poured them straight club soda. I think he just poured him straight club soda. And like who drink that's I thought the same thing of like, who just drinks fucking club soda. Yeah.

Some kind of fucking psycho. Yeah. And then he goes, his mom goes, where'd you learn? Where'd you learn to make drinks? He goes the road, baby. Yeah. That's good stuff. And then I'm going to skip way ahead.

But like what I'm going to skip over is like you get Stedman kind of stepping in as the love interest and you get Jack getting jealous and like you see Stedman and mom dancing and all that stuff. But I want to jump all the way ahead to the end and the last game. All right. So we got Henry's final game and it's for all the marbles for the end and the last game all right so we got henry's final game and it's for all the marbles for the cubs to make the playoffs in forever so they so i got so it's the last game of the season instead it's against the mets it's to win the division yep um steadman on the mound the what's his name john candy cliff Murdoch not it's not Cliff Murdoch is

it Cliff Murdoch I don't know could be anybody we want him to be I got I have succession on my mind that's why I was thinking Murdoch but um Cliff whatever his name is the John Candy the announcer he has a line where he says if the if they, then they're in the World Series, which didn't make any sense to me because this is just to get to the playoffs. There's one more. At this time, there was the Championship Series, the NLCS before the World Series. So that line confused me. They kept describing what happens after this game in different ways that i was like what what exactly are we playing is this the i i don't know what's going on it confused they were playing to make

the playoffs brandon just it's semantics all the kids always do this and i'm saying as somebody who like legitimately understands how the playoff structure works in major league baseball the way they were describing it confused me i imagine it was driving other people insane because they're like what is happening i didn't really pay any attention to it because i knew he wasn't going to play after that anyway so who gives a shit spoiler he he does play though doesn't he no he well he this is so so i got so he was gonna retire after that game no matter what he's gonna retire at the end of the season. Oh, but this ended up being his last game because.

Well, so I got, at the end, we'll get to the end because I got questions about this at the end. All right. Well, this is, Stedman is on the mound. He's pitching, he's pitching, he's pitching. It's no longer time for him to. During the part we skipped, we also forgot to mention that the owner is trying to ice out Stedman.

Yeah. He was trying to get rid of him. And so him starting was the coach going against the owner and being like, hey, you're my boy. Go win this for me. Yeah. Last one, baby. But Henry is running out to go relieve Stedman, and he – It's like what, the eighth inning or seventh inning, something like that? Something like that. Henry is running out to go relieve Stedman, and he – uh-oh.

It's like what, the eighth inning or seventh inning, something like that? Something like that. Or no, it might be – yeah, whatever it is. But we see – Yeah. No, it might be the ninth. It's not the ninth? Because I think they do two innings, and then the ninth is when Hito comes up.

But Stedman like ruins his arm. He says he felt it go. Tagging a dude out at home. Well, he blew the shoulder before. He blew it on the throw. And then that's why he had to go tag him because he couldn't throw it to home because he blew out his shoulder. That's right. He ran and tagged the guy out at home, saving a run.

And then he goes to the bench and he's like, I'm done. I can't do it. And the coach is like, no, you're my boy. You can do this. And he's like, no, my shoulder's done. I'm legitimately out. And that's where we get Henry. Yep. And then we see

the baseball sitting there, though, and he comes out and he slits. The same exact way, of course. Same exact slow motion fall. Looking back, watching this back,

I hated this part. I loved it. The fact that it's exactly the same. Arms out, and then his mom's like, oh no, his arms out. I think it would have been just as... Or even more. I think it would have been just as or even more.

I think it would have been better instead of having him fall the same exact fucking way. That if you just like, because they were talking about tendons and everything. And if you just have them like the tendons got loosened again. Yeah. And just have them like

with Stedman where he throws it in his arm. He's like, oh, fuck my arms now. Instead of having him slip up in the air. But I mean, again, the slow-mo scenes, again, with him falling are fantastic. Brandon, I completely disagree.

They do the zoom in on everybody's face. I'm not going to spend a lot of time on why you're wrong on this, but I'm just going to say I disagree. I think doing it the exact same way, I think it's lazy is what it is. It's called coming full circle, Brandon. It's a game changer's move is what that is. It's coming all the way around back to the beginning and here we are

we are resetting back from once we came but yeah he actually became a solid baseball player in this time for him to be clumsy again doesn't make any sense it's a game changers move it's a game changers bullshit move is what it is uh brandon i just all right Anyways, long story short, he loses his arm and he starts intentionally walking the dude. And everyone is like Henry WTF. And he's like, huddle up, listen here.

You saw the slip, you saw the fall, the arms out, but I got a plan. What is plan number one, Brandon? The fall trick. These fucking trick plays, dude. It wouldn't be a 90s kids sports movie without some trick plays. Yeah. And the janitor absolutely crushes the hidden ball trick.

That could not have been pulled off without the janitor doing what he does best and that is just deceiving everyone constantly yep yeah so that he walks one guy does the hidden ball trick gets him out boom one out this is this is the top of the ninth right now yeah next i think we're only we're only up one run right i believe i think it's two to one yes yes so the second second guy comes up and guess what he does again? He starts walking him. Yep. Intentional walk to first base, but this time he starts

to mock him and toss the ball. This is this is this is the moment where I was like, we need a pitch clock because he dares the runner. He's not even he's legit not even paying attention to the battery. He's just he's off of the mound staring at the runner at first i i dare you to run i dare you to run and then he goes to throw it up as high as possible fakes him out and somehow he runs and he catches up to this

grown man with me i don't know how he's as fast as that grown man yeah and and tags him out boom two out boom boom here comes your boy the big hoss himself he don't final hito and for strike one wait did we did we is this did we already get to where he pulls the mid apart and sees the name? Yes. No, no, no, no. I think it's in the middle of Hito. Yeah, it happens right before the last pitch because he does the first pitch, I think, and Hito.

Is it the first pitch where he cranks the home run? No, the first pitch he throws it so slow that it throws you off. Oh, they're like a change-up. He threw a change-up. Yeah. And then the second one, he cranks it. And he hits it and he goes, see ya. And then it goes foul.

Yeah. Cranks the foul ball. Henry is nervous and looks at his mom. And his mom points at the glove. And he pulls the thing aside. And he says, oh, my Lanta, my mom was the baseball player. Yeah. So a little preface here. Throughout the movie, you got to give context here.

Throughout the movie, you get tidbits of how his dad was a pitcher. His dad was a great baseball player. His dad was a pitcher. And you think he has his dad was a pitcher. His dad was a great baseball player. His dad was a pitcher. And you think he has his dad's glove. Yes. So then we get to this point, the little tape or whatever comes off and it has his mom's name written in

the glove. And he realizes his mom was the pitcher all along. And then the lob toss that, hold on. Yeah, it all comes full circle with the lob toss. Yeah, that, hold on. Yeah, it all comes full circle with the lob toss. Yeah, wait, hold on. Phil Brickma, way before, when she tosses the sunscreen, he goes,

hey, your mom's got a pretty good arm. I haven't seen the floaters pitch since Scruffy McGee. Scruffy McGee, dude. I'm fucking Scruffy McGee. Yeah. So he's making eye contact with his mom. Yeah. And they're having like a

like a silent conversation they're they're having a conversation they're talking to each other I don't know how they can hear each other because they're both whispering they're it's called reading lips Brandon that's from that far away that's some great eyesight i couldn't i couldn't read lips from that far away even with my glasses easy but uh but yeah so that that's yeah that's how that's when he's like okay i can float this yeah just like scruffy mcgee yeah and your boy is just licking his chops at that bad boy but in the end he's literally literally licking his chops much like charlie he swings he misses he gives it was a terrible cold it was a terrible swing honestly he i expected better from keto that was a rough swing uh but anyway and strike three done he's out game over and long story short

um happy ending so i got a question so that was so here's here's my questions about what's going on so stedman's out right stedman who was um i'm not gonna say he was their best pitcher because he didn't start opening day the other dude did but we'll say he was what their two or three starter right he's done he's out stedman's done I assume Henry's out with injury too he can't he can't floater his way through the fucking playoff that was the end of the game yeah but now we're on the playoffs

they won the division we're in the playoffs so I'm assuming Henry's done Henry's injured right he's not playing in any playoff games because he can't yeah he can't win a he can't he can't continue to do the floater throughout the playoffs. People are going to get wise. Brandon, they don't

talk about it afterwards because the Cubs go on to get absolutely destroyed in the first two of the playoffs. That's my thing. They win the World Series. He shows the ring at the end, which means they won the World Series. My question is, without

Stedman and without Henry, how the fuck did they win? Because we've established before Henry got there, they were the worst team in the league. I don't get how... Because you don't have Stedman. No Stedman, no Henry. How did they win the World Series? Brandon, Brandon, Brandon,

you don't know shit about winning. And the scene where he's in Little League and at the end he's in Little League and he shows the ring. He's still wearing jeans while he's playing Little League. He couldn't afford baseball pants now? He's a goddamn Major League Baseball player. Wearing a World Series ring on your throwing hand during a game?

Are you fucking stupid? Well, it's not his throwing hand. He's right-handed. Still, in your glove hand, even more dumb. Like, wearing a World Series ring while playing? Dumb. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Yeah.

So dumb. But I just, I would love to have a sequel where we figure out how they won the World Series. I would not. I would not love that at all. All right. Let's wrap this up, Brandon. Do you have any final thoughts on this excellent, amazing movie?

Shout out to Julie the Cat for being the apple of Henry's eye. Julie the Cat is the reason we do this movie. She probably has 10 minutes of screen time And two lines I think she has two lines But a very very key piece Of the movie She's the love interest Yeah without the love interest

This story does not move Oh wait we have to give a Cakey rating Alright Brandon give it your cakey rating Out of five, right? Yeah, out of five. I'm going to go. It's in the forest for sure.

Yep. I'm going to say like 4.3. That's good. I'm going to go for three. It's great. There's probably a few things I would change Like I mentioned Him falling the exact same way

I would tweak that 4-3, top to bottom Very little complaints Incredibly entertaining all the way through Super rewatchable It held up It holds up Like we like we said there's there's no real real inappropriate stuff so it aged well it aged fine yeah um i the acting is

the acting's great so that holds up to you i was gonna give it and we are for the first time ever we're basically at the exact same because i was going to say 4.41 oh okay i like to get real granular but that's mine 0.41 for rookie of the year i as i started watching it i forgot how much i watched this as a kid yeah like i completely forgot like and the uh oh my god why am i blanking on his name? But the pitching coach? That guy was... Brickma, Daniel Stern. Yeah, Brickma was my absolute favorite part of the whole movie.

The pitcher's got a big butt. The we need a pitcher, not an underwear snitcher. Hot eyes, dude. The high, stinky, Limburger. There was some stuff that like you know stuck in my childhood another one-liner that i that i just remembered is from the mom it's when they're when she's

beating up jack and she kicks him out and she legit punches him and throws him out of the house and then she comes back inside and her and Henry are like pumped up on adrenaline and they're like yeah that was so cool so cool and his mom looks at Henry and goes that was so awesome maybe I should have killed him I forgot about that I like when she said that I was like

oh that's intense that's good that's the kind of energy I'm looking for though yeah I love it. All right. Well, you heard it here first, listeners. Rookie of the Year, ultimate rewatchable children's sports movie. Just some great, funky, butt-loving good stuff. thanks for listening everyone please remember to follow and like us on instagram at the cake

eaters pod on twitter at the cake eaters also reach out to us via email the cake eaters pod