The Cake Eaters - 69. The Skulls

Episode Date: October 24, 2023

The boys are continuing the spooky theme for today's episode, as they talk through the early 2000s thriller The Skulls. Heath and Brandon delve into the seedy underworld of secret societies by discussing Creed, making up your own lyrics when you don't know the words, buying CDs, Def Jam video games, Heath's favorite moat scenes from movies, Brandon's top 5 "fixers," Conspiracy Heath makes an appearance, and we get more anti-capitalism rants from Brandon. Follow us at www.thecakeaterspod.com and on Twitter (@thecakeeaters) and Instagram (@thecakeeaterspod) Email us at [e-mail]

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the end of the course dude that's like matchbox 20 you know like do you really actually know the lyrics to their songs or do you just see whatever's in your heart him what's his name right yeah rob thomas and then uh the dude from fallout boy it's like i have no idea what words you're saying you know you need enunciate enunciate please but like when you grow up in that age when you didn't always have access to lyrics you didn't care you just said you just mumbled through it no you you mumble or say what's in your heart you know and that's fine that's that's that's the beauty of the 90s you know you wake up there were uh there were a couple songs i'm blanking on them right now but i know there was at least a handful where it took until like my late 20s where i was saying like there's a completely wrong line like i thought i thought one phrase was the lyrics and

it was something slightly different that kind of sounded similar that was the right lyrics son of a bitch at this point i just lean into it you know i just know well yeah they're gonna be a ballpark and i'm i'm right they're wrong you know my version is obviously better my favorite to do that in is uh bone thugs and harmony crossroads you know you just you just say what's in your heart at that moment in time and you know it can become really really beautiful and enchanting especially if you're a stone cold lyricist like myself brandon you know just writing rhymes and doing crimes that's what that's what i'm about uh anyway this is the kick eater's podcast i'm brandon that's heath we are we are talking uh

the reason for the the creed open here is because today we're talking about um a blast from the past he's 2000 the skulls featuring i love it i should i should say featuring i should say starring lead actor joshua jackson aka charlie conway aka pacey aka pacey and so this is i believe this is right toward this is right after kind of dawson's ended right when did dawson end oh boy brandon you're asking me pull it up i'll pull it i'm not prepared for um but this so oh so this is in the middle of dawson so dawson went to dawson's creek ended in 2003 so this is right smack in the middle of it yeah this is a fantastic movie the year 2000 you know this is he was in eighth grade hiding y2k hiding was uh graduating from high school and so i was moving up into um you know freshman year high

school it was a it was a big year you know and this movie came out on vhs from the movie theater man i remember it i was that was a part of the run you know because it was a badass movie like this was a movie if you were like kind of a badass and your parents let you rated r movies yeah this is it is this even rated r i think this has got to be pg-13 right i don't know it's not pg-13 yeah still still but um this came out right around your birthday too this is the release dates march 31st 2000 man fantastic you know this movie is this i remember this i remember this being built up um with like the trailers and everything about like oh like oh shit this is gonna like this is gonna open some eyes and then i remember watching it and being like, this is not, this is nothing that anybody didn't already know. You know, this is,

it was, I feel like it was built as like a big, like expose kind of thing. And then it just, it was like everybody already knew all of this. You know, you're, you're not, you're not blowing any secrets open here, bud. The, the lead up to us doing this movie in my head was like, Oh hell yeah i can't wait to watch this movie that i haven't seen since like middle school right like i haven't watched it since i used to rent it from the movie store and so in my brain i was like dude this movie was so badass paul walker

joshua jackson it's a it's a fucking girl again i can never yeah like the girl in there is fantastic like in the all the adults you got fucking um coach got fucking coach from coach shooter mcgavin too oh you know i put that in there he eats pieces of shit like you for breakfast right now the the stack is is crazy though it's joshua jackson paul walker um his his best friend is played by hill harper you got leslie bibb that's the girl chloe yep and she's in all kinds of shit hold on the the guy the guy who plays uh leverett is uh what's his name william peterson that's the the csi guy yeah um yeah and then yeah like you mentioned coach craig t nelson christopher mcdonald shooter yeah dude um i felt bad for shooter he got uh he got he got roughed up in this movie dude the girl that plays chloe is an iron man iron man too

law-abiding citizen she's great and that remember she's like the she's like the underling that gets blown up in her car remember that spoiler alert sorry wow for people who wow i mean it came out came out in 2009 if you haven't seen that movie yet like get a life dude or get get cables on tnt like every other weekend that's true that is one of those movies that's just that's yeah they get they they're like dad marathon starts with law abiding citizen at 8 a.m then it's a rambo marathon that's rambo shout out rambo shout out game changers god brandon don't don't shout out that show um shout out shout out big mike who fucking loves Rambo. All of them.

Even the new ones that came out, we just watched some of them. We still sign off on them. Rambo, all the way. All the way. We're just big Sylvester Stallone fans, but not the Rocky trilogy. We're Rambo and Expendables people in our household. What do you guys have against Rocky? I love Rocky. Big Mike,

he likes it. It's just he would take Expendables and Rambo over Rocky all day. Okay, interesting. Interesting. It's a bold take, but that's just the fact, Jack. I mean, I'm not a huge Rocky guy either. I'm not a big Sylvester guy in general.

You know, to each their own Anyway, skulls A skull above any other, Brandon Live by the rules Die by the rules And then what's the other Our rules supersede the rules of the outside world Yep Which is, that's a bold stance to take

Well, that's I mean, that's Interview anyone from the take well that's i mean you know that's interview anyone from the world economic forum and they're gonna agree you know that's that's all i'm gonna say are we not going there no we're going this i'm fully expecting um 100 conspiracy theory heath to come out during this because for anybody that had the world economic forum and the world health organization which are basically terrorist groups at this point like they're going to be put on blast regularly in this podcast because then black rock vanguard all of them sorry brandon didn't mean to cut you off just just wanted to warn the fucking people that

we're coming after and the cia is probably going to take a lot of stray bullets here too because they're the fucking most corrupt shit well so speaking of all of those so for for anybody who hasn't seen the movie the skulls is about uh a secret society these secret societies that are um kind of housed and operated within the ivy league schools um so the in the in the movie the skulls is the uh the name of the secret organization but there's there's kind of the big three in real life um there's i got a list here there's skull and bones which is this one's loosely based on scroll and key and then wolf's head those are the big three um and like you mentioned there's a ton of people in these secret societies and they're not exactly secret about being in the

secret societies um because it's a it's a really easy list you can find on the interwebs real quick but just to list off a few um paul giamatti and kind of the whole giamatti family and i went down a whole giamatti rabbit hole once i figured that out giamatti crime family you mean i don't know if you can go that far i'm going to brandon i'm going that far although what what his what his dad did to major league baseball and pete rose and shoeless joe jackson that's a crime for sure yeah but um but george w bush and george h.w bush both members of, I believe, their Skull and Bones. Well, that's not surprising. What was the main theme? They fucking love war.

So I read loosely that because the dude who directed this, Rob Cohen, shocker and this is why the this is why it's it was like it's not as as uh as much of an expose as it could have been because rob cohen is an ivy league graduate he's like he runs in these circles i don't know if he was i couldn't figure out if he was actually part of a secret society or not but he's he's he's he interacts with these people of course he's not gonna drop the the fucking you know drop the bag on him but he's not gonna drop the hammer he's gonna. Of course, he's not going to drop the fucking, you know, drop the bag on them. He's not going to drop the hammer. He's going to romanticize it because he's trying to cover for these sick bastards who are lining his coffers, Brandon. Everyone is in on it.

Let's burn the system to the ground, Brandon. It's the only fucking way. But so, okay, calm down. Sorry. Sorry, Brandon. Sorry. I got excited usually i'm the one usually i'm the one calling for dismantling capitalism here heath but i'm not dismantling capitalism

i'm trying i want a capital you can't dismantle the system without dismantling capitalism it's at the heart it's at the heart of every issue i just want to overthrow those dust collecting sons of on the right and left on in our fucking Congress and get them all out of there. And I want to have a party called the Sanity Party that is going to just root out all of the fucking corporate swamp trash that is in our Congress. See, this is how so I'm going to. So this is how I know that we should not let you be in charge of this no no because the fact that you would call it the sanity party makes me believe that you're just as bad as the rest of these guys no way no way yes i'm gonna i'm gonna the fact

that you would even think about calling it the sanity party that's the easiest way to to fuck you that's like the oldest trick in the book is like yeah i called the party what would you what would you you you know what you just reminded me you just reminded me heath at the very spoiler at the very end of this movie the csi guy william peterson he says a line where he goes hey the good guys won referring to himself and i wrote in my notes and i'm going to tell you right now heath you are not the good guy yeah brandon we've already talked about this remember how i accidentally become the villain this is why exactly it's because of shit like sanity party that's that's what i would i i would actually well i take that back i would call it the jenkins and josie party because i would run in honor of making the world a better place for

beautiful wonderful creatures like my two dogs that's fair okay but anyway so before before we got before we started yelling at each other i read in an article don't know how 100 true it is but it's speculated that rob cohen based paul walker and coach is relationship and their dynamic on the george hw bush george w bush dynamic oh so george bush killed someone in college i i'm not saying it well technically well you know the bush family has at least 10 dead hookers first of all technically paul walker didn't kill him okay shooter killed him yeah shoot him again yeah uh but i'm sorry so john the the bushes are in there john kerry is is a member as well the uh the founders of fedex heinz blackstone wrigley and pillsbury

all members none of that is surprising there's a you know numerous links between these secret societies and the Illuminati there's a huge huge rumor that skull and bones specifically runs the CIA yeah that's not surprising. The CIA is gone completely rogue. It's corrupt. Have you read any? I've got a whole list of just even like the scratching of the surface of declassified CIA documents, Brandon. Yeah. People suck.

Does it say who killed Biggie? No, it doesn't. But what I do have to say is for all the youths out there that are out there protesting in the streets on behalf of either party of the government, you're an idiot. I don't know. You're a pawn. So you'd rather they not protest i think that they should protest against the people telling them like if the government is telling you to protest something you should always second guess it when is the when is the government ever specifically told them to protest something all the time the government like what i would love so i would love some specific examples here

brandon in 2020 they literally were, take to the streets and protest. Go do it now, even though we were supposed to be locked down in COVID. It was chaos. I don't remember the government saying that, but okay. Oh, they did. There were a lot of government tweets about it, Brandon. Okay, so this is what I was afraid with conspiracy theory, Heath, is that we're not going to have any facts, just hearsay, just a bunch of hearsay.

Everyone is wrong, Brandon. That's what I want everyone to get. Everyone is wrong. Okay. You know who's not wrong and who may actually be the good guy? Actually, I don't know. Josh Jackson? Yeah, I was going to say he may actually be the good guy, but he does he does some sketchy shit um yeah but deep down he's he's he's kind of the hero you know and that's okay well yeah i mean that's uh that's that's what happens when you raise the duck you know you got that that moral fiber inside of you oh god i love it um yeah i mean everything about the lead up to this movie i like the first half

they kind of started like it just it got real crazy at the end um i want to point out before we get into like the nitty-gritty stuff i want to point out the names in this movie because they're real weird caleb mandrake caleb mandrake is Paul Walker. Luke McNamara is Joshua Jackson. And then Coach or Craig T. Nelson's name is Lytton Mandrake. What a name that is. And then William Peterson, the CSI guy, his name is Ames Leverett. And then Shooter is Martin Lombard. But yeah, just some real crazy.

The university provost do you did you know what the provost was so many syllables and all of these names um provost is let me look it up because i i kind of know what it is but it's not exactly it's like um depending on what they're at yale right so yale's not a yale's not a catholic university is it i don't think it is um i don't think so but because provost so here we go provost is a senior admin officer so it's like i'm assuming it's like a step below the dean you know just a just a fancy title senior academic admin there's a fancy title in a way for one of your buddies to get on the university payroll. They're the CEO of universities, the chief academic officer.

So, yeah, like a step below the dean. The. There was a really good podcast on the Bill Simmons podcast where he brought in a a guy and he talked about like the university systems and like the money and like. Oh, do you know? Like because they can't pay players and like what they have to do with all this excess money is nonprofits. And it just the spending has gotten so crazy because they. Yeah. Anyways.

Yes. If they're if they're a university systems also broken. If they're if they're a private university like Yale or like all these Ivy League schools, they don't have to do as much of the money moving. But if you're a state institution, all that money they're raking in from donors and boosters and football tickets and shit,

you gotta move that around very carefully as to not have to pay fines and taxes and shit. Yeah. Or just hire the CIA. They'll clean that money for you real quick. I did like how we got introduced to Josh Jackson, too. He's serving up slop in the in the mess hall to all those rich students you know he's got some oat they're serving up some gross looking oatmeal

i was really confused by the guy by the guy the the guy who said keep it in the bowl next time is joshua jackson not keeping the oatmeal in the bowl when he hands it to people like he must just be aggressively sloppping that oatmeal like like i couldn't i couldn't tell lunch ladies i couldn't tell if it was like a legitimate complaint that he had to joshua jackson or if he was being like a high-class douche and he like made the mess and was like clean it up poor boy i think that's what they were okay but yeah it's just it didn't they didn't execute it very well no no but it's you know kicking off the movie with a lunch line confrontation over some oatmeal nothing

nothing says you know bratty fucking private school kids and yeah and then then john then he hops on the bike and his his townie friends start chasing him down i love the townie interaction in a freshly stolen car the three townies are the they're the glue of this movie they fucking they're clutch i love them all i love how he goes he's talking to the girl in the middle seat or she's talking to him and she's like i liked your hair better when it was longer he's like you know i was gonna say the same thing to you oh i love it um i also and i don't remember which part but like they're they're talking about him on the rowing team and then they flash to caleb mandrake and he's like with some girl and she's like i can't see the race and he's like imagine it i wrote that line down what a fucking nonsense line that is the same thing to say to someone before the rowing race

right like i was all in at this rowing race too like that was dude i was solid i was i was reading a i was reading a review of this i I forget who wrote it. Forgive me. But they were like, they were trashing the whole movie. They were like, it's boring. It doesn't make any sense. There's no, like, real, like, you know, knowledge into secret societies or anything like that. And then the last line is, you got to give the director credit, though, for making the most exciting rowing scene in a movie. Yeah.

It was amazing. Like, they really reel you in in that rowing scene in a movie yeah it was amazing like they really reel you in in that rowing scene with uh with his buddy calling the shots like getting them all excited we dude we got three and the dude got four suits and then the dude snaps his oar yeah and then they got a bail gtfo get the fuck out of the boat and then josh jackson has him ripping and shredding dude oh my god that was fantastic it was a great scene i was on uh i was on the edge of my seat for sure yeah i mean granted it the best like paul walker stole this entire scene so i tell him the girl to imagine oh yeah it's a great line because he's then they set him up he pulls up you know he pulls up in the car with a with a

buddy and two girls two girls are in the back and he gets that like they pull they pull up like a drive-thru where he just pulls up to the edge of the lake and then pops up on he pops up on his seat so i'm blocking the girl yeah i i was really confused of why he was there though just who wouldn't want that is intense competition you gotta go in i just can't imagine your team take down harvard and so i i uh whatever the uh did you ever did you ever go to the the gala or uh i forget i forget the name of it but there was a it was like a gala uh regatta gala in in seattle they did it every year with a bunch of colleges it was like a rowing competition they did in the lake no lake washington that was like a like a huge deal um

people would party around it um i never like went to the actual race and i imagine most people don't go i imagine most people aren't going to rowing races unless like chloe like you're you're in love with the dude who's doing it you know so like I was just confused why Caleb would show up like he he doesn't he never talks about rowing it's not like he's a big rowing guy he's not even on the T like it's it's just it was a weird thing show up to stuff in college we did that all the time I'm not showing up to rowing if you're bored been drinking all day just you know tailgate some rowing dude you would you would drink and drive to the the regatta gala listen brandon you can tailgate anything does nebraska even have water to go watch a rowing well it's

all like man made listen dude like you you talk about like some tailgating. I bet tailgating like that championship bowling team is fantastic. I bet that's some great tailgating. Championship bowling team? Yeah. What are you talking about? The University of Nebraska bowling team. It's fantastic. Oh, do they win the championship?

All the time. You know, they're one of the best top ranked bowling teams in the in the nation you can tailgate anything brandon you can tailgate these people aren't tailgating though he just he pulled up after the race started you can't tailgate after the race started brandon people show up to events like college kids go to just events like did you not do that on campus you really didn't just like go to stuff no but i went to a commuter college i didn't go to just events like did you not do that on campus you really didn't just like go to stuff no but i went to a commuter college i didn't go to like a um i didn't go to like a fancy thing oh see well that's your i didn't go to i went to a state school but like you still

would just like there'd be stuff going on and you'd be bored so you're just like you guys want to go do this like yeah i would just i would just go to uh i would leave and just go to a bar or go to go to a an event that's not you know like it's just i don't get it i don't brandon obviously you didn't go to wayne state because you don't have any wildcat ride at all none oh if i would have went to Wayne State, I would have killed myself. That is really, really mean, Brandon. Like, it's a good state school. Like, be nice to it.

Perfect for kids. I just am very confused on why Caleb Mandrake went to the Regatta Gala. I think you just need to get over it. People go to stuff, man. I really don't think I'm using the term regatta gala right I don't even think you know what you're talking about I legitimately don't know what it means This episode is going off the rails Let's rip through this movie

Because it's great Before we move on There's two real suspicious characters with binoculars At this rowing race One of which is like One of the generals in the pacific He's like one of is like one of the generals in the pacific he's he's like one of the captains or the generals in the pacific oh interesting just but they give us uh he gets killed they give us a lot of uh a lot of expose a lot of exposition here kind of filling in the

gaps at the beginning of this movie here apparently because paul walker is a mandrake so he was born and bred for the secret society he was yeah he was a skull from the day he was born because as we learned later on his dad runs the whole thing and then uh and luke lucas aka josh jackson he wants desperately to get in on one of these secret societies because they'll pay for your school for you and yeah he's just that's what he that's what he's heard he's your least favorite type of person brandon he's an orphan and so he's looking for some help uh to get his school paid for i don't think he's an orphan his mom died oh okay i was just i was just trying he's a he's a half orphan i was just trying to and as as a fellow half-orphan, I resonated with him.

You know, I got him. Oh, man. I mean, this is the second time he's been a half-orphan. He was a half-orphan in The Ducks. Yeah, yeah. He's got a type. He's got a character type. That's true.

I think... Oh, crap. I'm trying to remember. I don't know. I don't know. I can't remember if he's a half- in dawson's creek too or not i can't remember but um but so so the the two guys give us some more information on luke he wants to join he wants to join the skulls specifically because he's turned down the other ones exactly they they approached him and turned

down so he's waiting for the skull specifically because he's heard that they will pay full ride law school yep you got it but then we saw that bill 45k you know 45k in 2000 for law school that's a stiff price i would i would have thought it would have been a little more even even back then but you know that's probably that's probably straight tuition that's probably not counting room and board you got all that stuff which by the way the dorm rooms are fucking bonkers in this they're like yeah then i wrote that down i was like these dorms don't make any sense at all um and they had a there's a dumb a dumb waiter in yeah i mean i wouldn't be surprised like if they had like old historic buildings with stuff like that in it right the dorm rooms are not that big that was

like a legit like like that was like that was like a 5 000 square foot apartment yeah it was like yeah the i wrote that in my notes. I was like, man, these dorm rooms, like, I don't know where the fuck they're living, but this is not how dorm rooms work. Dorm rooms are there like military barracks to crush your spirit. Yeah. Exactly. Oh, man.

What I did love about the dorm room, so Brandon, is that they were throwing a Nerf whistle football back and forth to each other. And did you have one of those? Oh, yeah. Oh, my God. The little tail always broke off after a year or so, right? Like that was just we, Big Mike would always super glue that bad boy back on and we'd get another you know six months out of it but would it still whistle pretty good yeah because the whistle wasn't on the tail the whistle was on the football itself that's that's right just kind of yeah you know helped with uh rotation for the whistle yeah dude all those nerf footballs that was like right when i was growing up and

nerf nerf super soaker like if you didn't have you know some of that it was just you what were you even doing i mean i never i was never lucky enough to get a good uh to get like a good um squirt gun or or whatever um i never got a big one i got a like i got the affordable medium one that would go on sale at kmart that no one bought oh yeah see i would i didn't even i never even had those i had a couple like the little tiny like pistols um i was a big whenever like a water like a squirt gun water fight broke out i was a big water balloon guy though i would go run to the sink fill up some water balloons and then just start bombing people yeah they can they can snipe you with that little you know bit but once you but once you bust out that grenade, they're going to be paid.

Yeah. Getting hit with a direct hit, getting hit with a squirt gun is, you know, no harm, no foul, but you get, you get a water balloon to the face,

dude, you're out, you're out for a couple of minutes. Yeah. Direct hit, even to the body, you know, direct hit your,

your real wet. Yeah. Um, all right. So yeah, but you know, Oh, but then, um um so while they're throwing the nerf football and they're talking about the skulls and how he wants to do it well so they're talking about he's talking about how he's thinking about doing it he wants to join the skulls yeah and the whole time

his best buds like like why he's like yeah yeah these are the worst of the worst what does he say if if something's secret then it's then it can't be good or something like that i forget the exact word something's elite and it's secret it can't be good yeah um yeah so so we're getting the the the tension here between him and his buddy. Yeah. And then we're – because he wins the race. They win the race, and they're out partying at the bar. Yeah. Drinking from the chalice.

Yeah, it's fantastic. And that's when he breaks down the whole, you know, this is how much it's going to cost. This is how long it's going to take. I've got to pay off all these loans, but if I join the skulls, they're going to pay for it, which I respect the hustle. Honestly,

if I honestly, if I was in that position and I had like any, any appeal at all to a secret society, I would be, I would at least think about it. You know, I gotta be honest with you though because we'll it's that leads us to what like these first moments i would be like you know

i thought a secret society was for me but i'm not quite sure anymore because like that not the first part where he's just like running from pay phones to the astro lab and then he drinks the drink and um and he passes out from the school but man waking up in a coffin i probably would have tapped out then i would have been like this is my worst nightmare and and not just the coffin brandon but waking up in a room full of coffins in like gently shallow water like in like a cave in In a dungeon, yeah. That is weird, dark juju that I don't

want to mess with. I always tell that to Kelly. When we lived in Savannah, ghosts, spirits, witchcraft, dark societies, I don't like any of it. It makes me uncomfortable. I would rather try to keep things a little more light, a little bit more surface level.

But I'm not. That reminds me. Not enough. Along those lines. So my dad's real spiritual. He's real into crystals. He's real into all that kind of stuff, like incense, all that kind of stuff. Does he sage your

house does he sage the house he doesn't every once in a while he's not uh he's more he's more of a crystal guy than like a like a like a sage or candle guy okay but um yeah but there was a part um there was a part there was a time a couple years ago where he was he got really into um like talking or like like uh because he's really into meditation and all that too he got real big into like talking to angels you know like asking oh like talking to them asking for for prayers and all that kind of stuff but what he would do and it drove me and my sister crazy because we have experience dealing with, like, ghosts and stuff or hauntings or weird juju stuff going on. And so it drove me and my sister crazy because it was when we were all living in the same house and he would talk to these angels and he would essentially invite the spirits into the house and me and my sister are like yeah you know your intentions of like inviting the angels and all that is well and

great but you're also inviting everything else in here but yeah we're opening the door full swing here and we don't know what we're getting see and that's where you know what i'm not gonna do i'm just not gonna mess with anything i'm just gonna leave it all alone i don't like it makes me uncomfortable i don't want to have to deal with it i could have sworn like i swear my old house is as a kid was haunted it was old as shit it sounded like people were walking above me constantly i was trying to sleep at night it just you know i just i don't like it it's not for me We talked about this in a previous podcast, Brandon. The real world is scary enough.

Like, I don't need to add in anything. I don't need to, I don't need additions to what's already taken. I don't know how to, I can fight off like a burglar, a home intruder. I don't know what to do with a ghost or a demon. I got nothing. I got no, no reaper, you know. I got nothing. I got no repercussions. Not repercussions. What's the word I'm looking for?

No defense? Yeah, no defense. I'm done, though. I do love a good scary movie, though. This is... So for everybody listening, these are our Halloween episodes, our October ones. These are the scariest movies i could get heath to do he would he was not not interested because there are because uh there are a couple like real

legitimate scary movies that ducks are in especially scott what so scott, the guy who plays Gunner and Scooter in D3, he is like a crazy renowned and talented voice actor. And he does a lot of the demon sounds in scary movies, like the Conjuring movies. He does the demon sounds for those movies. He was also in a couple like low-budget horror ones. I know Carp was in a low-budget horror movie. Averman, I think, was in a couple low-budget horror ones. I know Carp was in a low-budget horror movie. Averman, I think, was in a couple. There's a couple horror scary movies we could do, but this was the scariest one I could get Heath to agree to.

Listen, I'm not a big... Well, let me think on it for next year, but right now, dude, scary movies are the worst. They're so scary. right let's let's keep moving let's go all right all right so um we pop out we're popping out of the caskets you know paul walker wants another shot of the the stuff um and and then they said they said what do you think they gave them i don't't know. Probably just some knockout juice. What's the crap?

Never mind. Just move on. All right. Well, I am moving on. I don't want to start naming drugs and giving people ideas. Yeah. Oh, geez. Just try it all once except for meth. Yeah.

And don't give it to anybody else. That's a hard no yeah yeah just just do it yourself yeah um be your own skull you know yeah yeah exactly um but then uh him and paul paul walker are asked to go steal the snake everybody's asked to go steal the snake they're just the only ones that like go for it yeah because um they're because according to uh josh luke mcnamara he's a he's been a real menace to society before yep exactly um because he knows he knows how to pick locks with all his townie friends when they were stealing that weather vane though and almost fell in the moat or they did fall in the moat but like that's that's not a deep enough moat to really

have that kind of face first fall like i don't know that let's ask him for trouble they fell in it seemed pretty deep well i bet you that moat was deeper than you thought it was well i can tell you this they probably built it and dug it before they had proper building codes because to get something that deep in the middle of a university like that, there's a lot of issues. Like how are you fitting plumbing into that building with a moat that big? It's just a – Electric?

How are you running electric into that building? It's just a weather tower. I don't think it has any of that. It definitely doesn't have plumbing. There's no bathroom in there. It's just a weather tower i don't think it has any of that it definitely doesn't have plumbing there's no bathroom in there it's just a weather tower i thought it was attached to a building i don't think so was it oh i don't know they didn't really show they didn't really show much of it yeah i don't know either way i was just surprised that the moat was that deep yeah thank god it was though otherwise movie would have ended real quick

you know really the best moat scene ever is the robin hood cartoon from the disney movie that's what i'm talking about oh my god to ampro give me your uh give me your top five moat scenes right now. Go. So number one, Robin Hood cartoon. Number two is the Ewoks in the battle for Endor. When the water in the moat is acidic and it will eat you. But the Ewoks try to climb it all right um number three um shit i feel like there's a like a robin hood prince of thieves i'm pretty sure there's a moat scene in that that i'm just blanking on or or wait no am i thinking of it's one of the it's either a three musketeers or a Robin Hood Prince of Thieves.

It's one of those that there's a moat scene in. It's one of the Robin Hood-esque. Another Robin Hood-esque. I just tried. Yeah, that's three. Shit. I don't know. I don't know if you have time for me. You can include this one. This one's four. Alright, so this one's four.

We need one more. One more moat scene. Okay okay i'm thinking of a moat i don't know i'm blanking i'm trying to think of all the i tried googling best moat movie scenes and nothing came up so i'm gonna say i'm gonna say beast master because that's like there's there's a sword and sorcery movie that has um or like crawl or something like that there's a there's a sword and 80s sword and sorcerer movie with a moat scene that would be fantastic okay there you go good job pretty um oh here we go here we go crawl crawl moat scene explain okay crawl k-r-u-l-l it's like

this insane sword and sorcery movie and there's like this weapon that's like a spinning thing with knives on it it's a terrible movie but it's i i just watched it not that long ago it's kind of good okay so i have really been dude i just crushed that i was on the spot to think of five moat scenes now granted i we gave me some liberties because i said there it was one of the live action robin hood movies and i couldn't identify which one but like might include all of them you know they all might have one you have a castle without a moat do you even know what the fuck you're doing i don't think you can call it a castle yeah all right anyways let's let's try and come back from this um um but so they steal the how long have we been recording this one's really going to be off the rails you have to do some serious editing they steal the snake uh the weatherman snake yeah and then he gets in a fight

with his roomie so they steal the snake from the from the other secret one of the other secret societies which is like it was like the serpents and slytherins yeah um and that's a that's a big thing that's a big tradition between the secret societies is they try to steal stuff from each other yeah um but yeah so then he gets uh he he wanders his way home in the morning and he's like what a night what a night and his his buddy is like he's son of a bitch he joined the skulls yeah uh he's like i don't know which in his defense he doesn't know yet that was like the test he doesn't know well they haven't given him the the green light yeah but when it comes to friendship there's no middle ground which is that's a dangerous that's a that's that's a real real hard stance to take

i agree i thought that was very dictator-y like you know it's like that's like the geni you know only the dark side speaks in black and white. Exactly. And his buddy gets his, but once, once his buddy realizes that, that Joshua is going to join this thing for sure, he gets real, real fucking sassy, dude.

Yeah. With the, with the no middle ground, there's the scene later on where Josh is like, where have you been? What have you been up to? It's a secret. And then he walks away.

But this is real fucking sass but the tooth fairy has a little present underneath his pillow and it's the skull necklace and that means that medallion it's time for the formal initiation um and this is where he gets paired into his soulmate with Paul Walker, a.k.a. Caleb. You know, live by the rules, die by the rules. And Skull's rules supersede the outside world. A Skull above any other. Exactly. Exactly. And this is where we see, this is where we get introduced to Coach as Caleb's dad.

Yeah. Craig T. Nelson. William Peterson, the CSI guy. And I don't think, do we get introduced to coach as caleb's dad yeah craig t nelson william peterson the csa guy and uh i don't think do we get introduced i think shooter is a little later on yeah we kind of he's like in the background still but like he's not super he's so yeah shooter is like uh he's craig t nelson's like right hand man he's the he's the cleaner he's the fixer yeah yeah and every every good warlord needs a fixer like that. I mean, could you ask for a better fixer than Shooter fucking McGavin? Well, I don't know.

There's some fixers in other movies that I'm blanking on right now that could probably be right up there. Top five fixers, go. God damn it. I'm just messing with you. This one I can't do. It's not like moats. I think you got to go.

I think top five fixers. I'll give you top five fixers. And I'm fixers very loosely here. Okay. It's the loose term. Number one, John wick. Yeah. Number, number two, Denzel Washington from the equalizer.

Okay. Not bad. Number three, any, anyason statham character yeah okay dude what about denzel washington and man on fire that's a good one too oh and then the fifth one denzel washington remember the titans boom dude i will say he you. He fixed that community, dude. He knitted those racists together with those black people. Did I dare someone to name a bad Denzel movie? I can't think of one.

If The Rock wasn't The Rock, Denzel would always be my number one answer for favorite actor. Dude, I've been clamoring for years for Denzel to join the Fast and Furious franchise as a villain. I think that would be the coolest fucking thing. Like the coup de grace? Yeah. He needs to be the final boss. Like Fast and the Fur and the furious 20. yeah

Denzel as like a retired old like mercenary or something yeah no oh all right hold on let's let's get back because what happens well one one thing but so now that we're talking coach Craig T Nelson um for for anybody who's not um picking up while we're calling him coach there was a show from the late 80s to like the mid 90s called coach where he played uh it was a college football coach right like minnesota some some school in minnesota yeah i was looking that up because i remember watching that show and i remember it being just okay that went for nine seasons yeah 199 episodes that was such such a long running show mediocre shows used to take place for forever brandon as long as they had just a medium audience like it would still

make money now yeah with streaming they they now they they cut stuff too short all the time yeah exactly but but yeah nine seasons good for coach man good for coach i love it i love it well um to keep driving with the movie brandon we've got uh chloe showing us action jackson her um the first ever ai paint machine who thought dude in 2000 that was fantastic wait but before we move on to that because he's gonna take her out for a dinner dinner date oh yeah and i need to talk about action jackson for at least concert for conservatively 30 minutes i need to talk about action jackson brandon that sounds terrible i wanted this to go fast but but when when they're doing the whole scene with Coach, the whole soulmate thing, he mentions they have 322 alumni worldwide.

That's an Easter egg. Do you know what for? Huh. So in the skull, so the real skull and bones, the actual secret society, their logo is a skull and then crossed bones. And then underneath the crossed bones is the number 322. What does that mean? It's just like, I couldn't tell exactly what it meant, but it's just like a thing. It's like one of their, they call themselves like the order of the 322. They just work it into like a thing. It's like one of their... They call themselves the Order of the 322. They just work it in to a whole bunch of shit.

These secret societies are all about symbolism. Are you a big number theory guy? No, not really, but I understand why people get into it. I bet Kelly's a big number theory. I think I'm a six, maybe?

Is that a thing? You're a hard two. He's hard two. Dude, was that like a jab? Yeah, it was like a two at a time. Oh, I thought you were saying I was a number two, like I was a piece of shit.

Oh, no. Not that. Jeez, Brandon. It was no, no, not that. Geez, Brandon. It's kind of kind of harsh that time around, you know, my my my sister is real into the number theory. She's all about that. But OK, so three. I just looked up three to two number theory.

I'm not exactly sure if this is what they were going for. Probably not. But the number three to two is a reminder that new beginnings are always possible and there's a better future ahead. Maybe that's what they were going for. I don't know. That's exactly what they were going for because they get reborn from the caskets upon their initiation. And they say something, too.

Like, it's all like your future is now or some shit. You know what I mean like they're they're reborn as skulls so that actually makes sense okay solid there you go three two two um but so back to axel jackson which is a uh the first ever ai uh generated painting machine yeah yeah what is she way ahead of her time. I wrote down, uh, I wrote down what she, or like kind of what she said,

not a little bit, not word for word, but she goes, she's telling Joshua Jackson and she goes, um, I just program in whatever to get it kicked on. And then it, it chooses where,

like what color and where it's going to go. Um, so am I the artist or is the computer, the artist, or maybe it's just pure chaos. Yeah. That's that's fucking art brandon dude that's yeah the yeah but uh say that to an emo girl brandon and you will definitely get a second date um but she has she so she calls it action action jackson and she she says it she looks over to josh and she goes i

named it after jackson pollock um and calls it action jackson but she doesn't do you know what action action jackson is a seven it's like a famous 70s movie she didn't bring that up at all which i thought was very weird she just skipped right over that but she stole the name i kept thinking that it was uh more like flash gordon you know flash you know that's what i that's what i envisioned for action action jackson why is it so hard dude i was i'm glad you had trouble with it too because i was struggling action because i keep wanting to say jackson you want to make the same sound again but it's it's a slightly different sound it throws it off oh my god yeah yeah it's in in like on paper it looks easy but once you start to say it out loud it really starts to slip away from you it's a real uh real tongue twister man yeah all right so anyway so once once action jackson

is programmed and set to paint he no longer needs chloe for support so we get a little dinner date i do love that for for action jackson that he can you know you just turn it on and leave it you know yeah just let it rip like a rice cooker just let it go you're not supposed to just leave those brandon it's like a crock pot there's a whole oh dude people leave crock pots i know there was a whole like really tragic it's like the one of the saddest episodes of tv from that last of us show remember that it was like a whole thing like made people second guess leaving their crockpots on overnight because

they died. I didn't watch Last of Us. Neither did I, but I saw it. I read the internet. But as somebody from the Midwest, I can't tell you a time where I've seen anybody watch a crockpot. They always leave it.

Yeah, that's fair. Mam d leaves crockpots on yeah it's just part of it this is part of it but you know we had to stop using our pressure cooker because it beat too much like a like a smoke alarm and jenkins full full-scale meltdowns um instantly and you don't want to have to deal with that all right so anyways um she's like holy you're part of the schools because all of a sudden he has 20k in his bank account 20 20k signing bonus that's a pretty good deal especially 2000 2000 a 20 case that's what i was going to say, dude. Absolutely. I would sign up. This is how they get people, right? Like poor suckers like us.

If you shit 20 K, I can overlook just a little, I can overlook waking up in a coffin for 20 K. It will. And they, they did the thing. What movie was it that I was talking to that? We were talking about this.

Oh, with, with newsies where he, the gang initiation, they didn't ask him. They didn't ask him if he wanted 20k they didn't present a check to him they just boom right in the account no muss no fuss and now you owe us

yep that's for future services rendered exactly anyways I wish I had 20k I wish I had 20k i wish i had 20 i wish i had 20 actually i'd be tight dude i will say that i think lucas should have waited too bad they couldn't have waited until like after

thanksgiving because thanksgiving at the um so i wrote this at the so i wrote this down at the end when he like spoiler alert he's talking to craig t nelson and he goes guess i won't be coming to thanksgiving did this all take place before thanksgiving break yeah that's real quick that's yeah that's a short amount of time for shit to hit the fan like this this is a month and a half sprint of chaos like it was and i would have loved to get some thanksgiving like if they would have thrown thanksgiving break into this movie maybe we just had to go an extra 20 minutes i would have been all for it because could you imagine the level of psychotic behavior that would be taking place at this where if they get skunked, they don't eat

their turkey hunt. But you know they get like six or ten birds every time. Yeah. Well, I figured they were like shooting deers and shit too. Oh, I don't know. Dude, have you? Turkeys are mean as shit. Oh, yeah. Don't go

messing with turkeys. I don't mess with anything. I don't mess with any kind of bird. Yeah, if it's a real bird, it's mean. If it's a fake bird, it's spying on you. So that's lose-lose for birds. Yeah, except for chickens. But they have to be like, they can't be like fucking massive mountain chickens.

They need to be regular chickens to where, you know, worse worse i can just punt the thing you know yeah domesticated geese are cool wild geese are super mean yeah although you know i did see a tiktok about a goose that was really mean to its owner and it would bite him every time he would try to like it would protect the house from its owner even so like the owner couldn't even get in this goose was so yeah i got attacked by a flock of geese one time um while i was in my car nice i was like driving down a road and they decided at that point that they were all gonna get up and fly yeah but they did not they didn't judge the distance correctly and so only like two or three of them got above my car and the rest just flew smack into the side of my car nice probably broke a couple legs but uh that was their fault man you know you got if you you gotta get some altitude before you're messing with cars

man dude the craziest thing that i ever saw when i was driving down the highway it was on the that crazy patch of interstate in kansas we were talking about yesterday on line um and a hawk was going down for what i'm assuming was a piece of roadkill because i just happened to look over as i like see this hawk coming down and i look over and i hear boom and a massive like dually truck smoked the hawk head on as it was coming down it was that's the craziest thing i've seen as far as like roadkill highway things i still think about it sometimes like when i'm driving on a road trip like i still you know when you see that like it's like when you see like i saw a couple cats get run over like you never unsee that yeah i yeah the noise yeah

that's rough yeah luckily when when the geese hit my car i was on like a uh like a neighborhood street i was going like 25 miles an hour. So I didn't smoke any of them. I'm sure because there was like three or four of them that smacked into the side of my car. So I'm assuming they had like a broken leg or a broken foot or something. Maybe. Do they have ribs? A broken rib?

I'm sure. I don't know. Don't talk to me about that. But none of them got killed with with a Randy Johnson fastball. That's one of the best videos out there. But anyways, let's get back to the movie, Brandon. Let's finish this up really quick. They're in the schools.

This is where we get our intro with Creed because they're at their initiation skulls party. On the island. On the island. They're just alluding to epstein all over the place well no it's no it's it's an actual the the all of these secret societies this was before i mean this was way before epstein uh but then uh but all all of these all of these secret societies have like their. Skull and Bones, this is directly based on Skull and Bones, this island that they have in the middle of the St. Lawrence River.

But yeah, I wrote that down, though. I was like, the fucking island. I was like, I mean, rich people really, really love having secret secret sex castles and it's like just just have sex in your bedroom like a normal person or or if you want to get crazy go to the kitchen go to the living room you know go on the go on the balcony you know you don't need a you don't need a whole island oh man um or go have yeah go have sex in a club bathroom or something you know spice it up a little bit you don't need a whole island well after their initiation orgy this is where it really starts to hit the fan this this so this this scene really annoys me when they're getting

dressed um because there's very few things that i hate more in the world than a white bow tie. It's the most useless piece of clothing in the world. It's about status, Brandon. You wouldn't get it because we're white trash. I did write down underneath that. We need a secret society where you can wear cargo shorts. Cargo shorts, homemade jorts yeah called the class society i also wrote down uh watching this party because i'm trying to

because i'm not i'm trying to become a scott like a scotcher and a whiskey guy it's never it's never been my cup of tea i've never enjoyed scotch or whiskey or anything like that it's just not my thing but i'm trying to i feel like i need to i need to to cross over and become like a scotch guy it just it's because they use tea in movies so they make it look like you can just make it look so much better yeah but it doesn't it does not taste good and that burning sensation takes like a good five minutes to go away no but i feel like i i don't know i feel like for me but i feel like the as an irishman um i need to do it you know need to get better yeah yeah anyways

all right so brandon let's rip through the end of this movie because this is where the end of this movie we're not even halfway through this thing that's i'm going's rip through the end of this movie because this is where the end of this movie. We're not even halfway through this thing. That's I'm going to rip through the back half of it because this is where it starts to just start flying out of control. I do. I know it starts to take off before we get to the greatest scene in cinematic history. There's the Creed montage. But before I've already tried, I'm trying to move past that.

We haven't even got to it yet. We can move past yeah no we haven't we're at we're at the party we're at the part yeah that was them getting dressed we're at the party we're at the party i don't know you always you always skip over like the most important parts we already talked about them inviting him to thanksgiving i thought we were just anyways all right we will we need to talk about caleb more because caleb is a fucking uh i wrote i found my notes caleb sucks yeah he's just a trust fund trash human he's a silver spoon baby he's complaining he is like the most nepotism baby in the world his dad runs a fucking secret society that runs the world and he's like you keep throwing me in the deep end like what what more how many more favors and steps ahead could you possibly want

to where you wouldn't think you're being thrown in the deep end, you fucking baby? I don't know what to tell you. I mean, you know, just walking away with the two girls as Creed is playing. It's just, you know, that's the dream. That's that's on the bucket list. That's the dream. And I love that this girl, they scouted him out. So she knows, like, everything about that girl they scouted him out so she knows like everything about

that's that weirded me out yeah she's she uh real plant she looked scary she looked like the kind of girl that would like uh like poke a hole in the condom and not tell you and try to trap you with a get you with a trap baby yeah um but this is so that's really the end of the party is like when... And then the Creed montage, yeah. Yeah. The Creed, they play that, they play like half of that song, though. It's a lengthy Creed montage, because it's

them dancing. I love how they zoom out from Josh and the girl, and there's another couple right in front of them just making out hardcore. Well, that's what they're just, they're just like, man, all these young men are going to just be in their separate bedrooms.

Why waste any time? Just get right to it on the dance floor. That's exactly right. I'm pretty sure they make that joke on Don't Be a Menace. Oh, yeah. But the Creed montage goes on forever they give all of them

cars like legit like vintage cars yeah and then they're all speeding around having a great time as creed plays hit us with another rendition can you take me

higher wait what's the guy's name is it scott scott stapp your scott stapp could use some work it's not uh like you're doing a great job of singing but you definitely don't sound like scott stapp what is his more gravelly is he is he i'm trying i'm like you're you gotta go a little bit higher And a little more gravelly Can you take me higher That was better To a place where golden

Oh shit I forgot the words It's blind man's sea And then golden streets Oh golden streets I was saying golden dreams Well it might be dreams that's a completely different song yeah i know i was just uh i was gonna do same exact melody though yeah oh man dude i saw uh the amazon recommended creed's greatest hits

on vinyl to me and i was like oh boy amazon we're really getting out there you're a big uh you're a big greatest hits on vinyl guy i love it dude i don't want to well i mean the albums that i don't have that aren't greatest hits are like uh you know rush you can't go can't go wrong with with rush at all i like i like doing the actual albums uh you know because it's like uh you know that way you're getting the full story you know the only greatest hits that i have are death row greatest hits and credence i thought you bought a i thought you bought some other ones oh britney spears but that's for kelly that doesn't count there's a guy she was really stoked on that actually i um my parents called and i came back out and she was she was deep she knows she was the taste of your lips

that first britney spiel britney spears album was a bangeranger. I remember I had Oops I Did It Again. Dude, I was trying to explain to Kelly. I had hit clips of Oops I Did It Not Oops I Did It Again. Oops I Did It Again is the second one. It's the second album. The first one's Baby Hit Me One More Time. That's what it is. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

The pink cover. I had hit clips of Baby Hit Me One More Time. Holy shit. That's a fantastic throwback the hit clips i was trying to explain to kelly like because like what britney spears meant for 12 year old boys at that time like when that song came out i you know so i was i wasn't even 12 i was 10 maybe not maybe even 9 when that album came out. Cause I was in like, I think I was in, I think I was in fourth grade going into fifth grade. But, uh, that was the first concert I went to as a, as a young 10 year old little Brandon was, uh, Britney Spears, me and my, me and my cousin.

January 12th, 1999. You know? Yeah. So I would have been eight i would have been eight i was just about to turn i was three four months from turning 13 hitting teenage years yeah and i'm telling you right now i literally had a buddy that bought the album just because of the music video and how hot she is on the album. And it was just like, if you didn't, yeah, it's just that album coming out. And I tried to explain it to Kelly.

I was like, because she was like, oh, this album. I was like, yeah, I know. As a 12-year-old boy, that music video was something that you got real fired up about when you would come home from school on trl so kelly's my age right yeah yeah yeah so i mean it would have been very similar i don't i mean granted i don't know kelly because kelly's a week kelly's a weird case study but uh it would have been like it would have been just as impactful if not more than like n-sync at the because that was around the same time yeah the like the britney christina mandy moore was battling with the n-syncs the back streets the lfos

o-town remember that's really awful lfoFO was great, though. They were more of a one-hit wonder. They kind of got... Because they weren't really a boy band. They were a band of boys. Because they were playing

more rock. All I knew is that for a good period of time i only like girls who wear abercrombie and fitch i take her if i have one wish great song it's such a banger you know what else sorry this we'll get back to the movie but you know another song that came out that was awesome that that I love, that was a one-hit wonder, is the Steal My Sunshine. If you steal my sunshine. Oh, yeah.

Who sings that? I know that song. It's not for me. If you steal my sunshine. Who is that? Do you remember who that is? It's not that. Oh, damn it.

Oh, it's Len. Len. Dude, I knew it. I almost said L Len. Len, dude, I knew it. I almost said LFO. He's Canadian, dude, Canadian. Dude, that's another one. What was the other one that came out kind of around that time? Oh, Teenage Dirtbag, remember?

Oh, Teenage Dirtbag's a great fucking song. That song is just the best of the best. That was Teenage Dirtbag was on my Napster playlist. Dude, that hit Fish, Farmhouse. That was on there, too. Have you ever heard of the, I doubt you would have, have you ever heard of the band Queen of Jeans? No, no.

They're a modern, like, emo, I don't know if emo is the right word, but they're like an alt-rock band. Fantastic cover of Teenage Dirtbag. Highly recommend. This is my last one-hit wonder for you. Do you remember Harvey Danger? I know that name, but I can't.

Alright, hold on. Now I just went completely blank on that song. Flagpole Siddha. Oh, yeah. That's not a one-hit wonder though oh my god no no no is that the uh who am i thinking of is that the does somebody do a cover of that maybe that's what i was thinking of you know the uh i'm not sick but i'm not well yeah okay never mind no and i'm so high yeah flagpole sit is a great fucking song i that that album this the backstreet boys first album um i can't remember what else there was no there was a real tension in my household during fifth

and sixth grade where i was beginning to buy my own cds but i looked like a college kid and so i was buying parental advisory cds and mama d was getting real fucking pissed about it and like harvey danger was one that like i know i lost the ability to buy my own cds and so they would go out and because i bought death row's greatest hits and bone thugs in harmony east 1999 eternal and i think i had ice cube in there too maybe or or no it was uh ready to die by uh dude i had some fucking bangers uh cds and but then i lost all privileges and i started getting chumbawamba which you know i will always get knocked down and get back up again because they're never going to keep me down that's just how it is but um you know that's anyways there

was just a it was it was a very tension-filled time for music in our household you know and then they finally just once i was old enough to buy they just gave up right like once i hit like 13 i was basically you know a bearded adult and there was nothing they were going to be able to do from to stop me the first cd i remember getting was the britney spears one and then after that that's when it started uh delving into like eminem and um i remember getting the papa roach cd that was a big thing with uh and i my my parents were nowhere near the adults that uh mama d and uh big mike are so they were i was like 10 years old and i was like you know this uh papa roach song that says the f word

15 times can you buy that for me and they were like no problem dude no problem yeah you know mama mama d coming in with uh rage against the machine blare and just fuck you i won't do what you tell me fuck you i won't do what you tell me but you know so along flat along the lines of flagpole city you know what song always fucking gets me hyped no matter what no matter when when i hear it and no matter what cover version original whatever it is what song no matter who's hear it and no matter what cover, version, original, whatever it is, what song, no matter who's doing it, it always gets me fucking pumped. Mbop, Hanson. That's a great one, too. But not what I was going to say.

I was going to say 99 Red Balloons. I fucking love that song. Oh, dude, the German version of that song? If it's the original German one, I'm all in. If it's the American one, if it's a weird cover, I'm all in if it's the american one if it's a weird cover i'm all in no matter what dude you know what song i have been jamming so hard because it's almost octoberfest you know not to date when we're recording but like uh das flieger lied the flyer dude were you a big uh were you a big rammstein guy So stark, stark, stark, wie antike und so hoes. Were you a big, were you a big Ramstein guy?

Du hast. Du, du hast. Do you remember the scene in How High when they, when he's trying to wake up, when Method Man is waking up Red Man? That's when I got into that song. Dude, I loved Method man and red man i was listening to uh the wu-tang enter the chamber record it's the m-e-t-h-o-d man m-e-t-h-o-d man dude i fucking love those guys the um oh the the album that when they did their first like duo album with uh the rock wilder shotgun hand on the pump smoking on a balloon did you ever play um the cut like all this I'm sorry did you ever play

uh did you ever play Def Jam the video game no what you never oh dude that would have been right up your alley it's uh there was two as far as i remember there's def jam and the def jam vendetta was the second one and it was like uh it was like a wrestling fighting game but it was all rappers um and i used to i used to i was always uh i was always method man and red man whenever i do like a tag team match oh god damn i'm i just miss this you are right like this is right up my house do you have like a do you have uh any old like a like a ps2 or like an xbox or i forget how old they were oh like i i think i maybe i've told you i um like three years back i took a you know i took a swing on one of those like they hacked one of the new like little mini versions of a playstation and so i have

an emulator or whatever yeah i have every game so what system is it on because i like it would have been on when we stop recording i can go play it let me make sure it was on ps if it was on p if it's on ps2 i won't have it i guess there was a third one, too. Def Jam, Fight for New York. Def Jam video games. Let's see. Yeah, if it was on PS1, I can go play it. This would have been... Well, it's PlayStation 2, GameCube, and Xbox for Fight for New York.

PlayStation 2 and GameCube for Vendetta. There's a bunch of them here. Oh, that doesn't look like a fighting one. That just looks like a... Here we go. The Takeover was PSP, PlayStation Portable. We've got Def Jam Icon. Def Jam Icon was ps3 and xbox 360 so unless it's ps1 i can't do it or ps5

well you're out of luck then go buy that's go buy a playstation 2 and get def jam vendetta i think um that's that's not only your homework that's all of the listeners homework too if i don't have a playstation 2 at my parents house i can't believe that's all of the listeners don't work too if i don't have a playstation 2 at my parents house i can't believe that's not by you that would have been um yeah that's right up your alley yeah uh all right let's get let's get back to the movie brain let's jump let's jump back in because post hot girl flock and like that like they're not to the final initiation yet like they're starting the initiation um but but uh the friend is it will or is it caleb what's his friend or not caleb's the other guy will is paul walker

will's the friend yeah yeah this is where he gets real sassy he's like it's a secret yeah and this is where um he he steals the key from paul walker and goes into the key and the book so that they give they give everybody while they're doing before the island i think it was before that they give everybody a book with a with a key to the you know the layer the headquarters and the book has all of the rules live by the rules die by the rules and so yeah will breaks into into Caleb's car and steals both of them. And then he proceeds to sneak into a secret society in the middle of the fucking day. Yeah.

Dude, come on. How would you not expect somebody just to be walking around? This is exactly why I said this is where the movie starts to, like, really lose the thread. You know, like the ball of yarn starts to really come undone because it just I don't know this is where the movie kind of started yes because yeah yeah he's doing it in the middle of the day and then Paul Walker walks in on him right and he's friends Sam and he he gives him honestly he gives Will the perfect like ultimatum compromised he's like give me the key let's go get my book i won't say

anything you won't say anything if you're will all you got all you do is you go yeah sure no problem and then write your fucking article still you know yeah yeah just say yes to get out of the situation and we're right as right die well i mean brandon they would they would they would have killed him later after he wrote the article. But, you know, you get out of this situation. Well, this obviously you don't know shit about journalistic integrity, Brandon. First of all, we've gone over this multiple times. I am a capital J journalist. Okay.

That's exactly what I said. You can say something stupid like that. Editor in chief of the eighth grade paper all right so anyways we what happens post confrontation because it kind of flashes right and then we get it gives it it gives us like the first little 25 of the interaction and then we cut to a new scene yeah and then it's josh jackson just going to to chit chat with will to kind of like well yeah it's it's so it's that night and it's josh jackson just going to to chit chat with will to kind of like well it's yeah it's it's so it's that night and it's like three in the morning right it's like

it's really at night and he's like yeah it's because to josh and he's like real sad he's like man i'm i was so mean to my boy will let me go let me go make up with him yep yep they're gonna have some makeup and he's not he's not in the dorm and so he goes so he's like and will to the newspaper yeah exactly will's the journalist so he goes to the dorm, and so he's like – Goes to the newspaper. Yeah, exactly. Will's the journalist, so he goes to the newspaper to see if Will's there. Yeah, because he works on articles all the time. Well, that's – capital J journalist.

There's no – it's not a 40-hour work week. Putting in some real time. Yeah. Anyway, so then we see poor Josh Jackson gets, you know, we'll probably give him PTSD for a very long time, but he walks in on his buddy just hanging from the ceiling. So real talk, yeah, he opens the door to, like, the editor room, and his buddy's hanging from the ceiling. Like, real talk, if that happened to me,

I don't know if I could ever open a door again. Do you like? like real talk if that happened to me i don't know if i could ever open a door again i laugh because like i don't even know how to tell you how much i relate to yeah i would that thought would be in the back of my head every time i opened a door every fucking door every fucking door and and and like on the flip side right to any listeners right you know thinking thinking that that might be an option think about the person that has to open up that fucking door man and and how they can never come back from that you know like and especially the way he was fucking like trying to like push him up i was like geez this guy real real you know like trying to like screaming for help trying to you know of course uh no surprise josh crushes that scene the the raw emotion you know yeah um just very very well done by our boy he just he does a great job

uh in this movie a lot all most of them most of the actors i would say are doing a bang-up job will the guy who plays will does a bang up job. Chloe, the girl, she does a bang up job. Joshua Jackson kills it. I mean, Paul Walker is Paul Walker. So it's not the best acting performance, but it's serviceable. No, but he does like the typical Paul Walker stuff where he comes in and he looks hot and then he says like a line, you know. He's got a couple of scenes, you know.

Yeah. I mean, we talked to he stole the show at the very beginning he's like imagine it yeah that's that's that's a paul walker scene yeah oh yeah well so that's the thing that paul walker is always playing paul walker he's you know he's uh i love that guy dude oh dude he's not the greatest actor in the world but i i will watch any and all paul walker movies if you if if if the end and i can't remember which is the fast and the furious where him and vince um uh vin diesel drive off into the sunset after he dies oh it's uh it's seven because seven okay seven seven's the one where he died in the middle of shooting and then yeah the the last scene of seven is is them driving on the

highway and then they they go their separate ways oh man that doesn't i still cry every every time every single time i watch that took the words right out of my mouth like young men if you are out there and you do not weep softly into you know just just you know gentle tears as that scene happens then you need to do a pulse check because you have no soul um that is the saddest shit up all right we've got to go faster because we've been going like two hours on this movie and um well yeah, because, I mean, it's a great movie. So long story short. Will's dead. Will's dead.

It's really sad when him and Chloe are talking, and then he's got to go tell Will's mom. The detective lets him know that Will died of blunt force trauma to the back of the head. That's later on um because i'm trying to jump first at first the the the detectives like open shut suicide boom yeah um but then then josh starts acting real weird and the detective's like okay that's a little suspicious and then like it's a couple days later he goes we we noticed that he was you know he's got blunt

force trauma to the head. That doesn't usually happen with a, you know, with a self-imposed hanging. Yep. And right before that, when he's cleaning out Will's room, that's where he finds the secret compartment. Yeah. He finds Caleb's book and all the stuff that he, all the pictures that Will's taken. Cause he's, he's, we, we find out again later at the funeral that, uh, that Chloe knows that he's, he's writing an out again later at the funeral that uh that chloe knows that he's he's writing an article trying to expose the secret society yeah and uh joshua jackson is like

why would the fuck wouldn't you tell me yeah um and then chloe hits us with a real like a real fucking like wake up call line she goes maybe if we actually would have been the friends that we thought we were none of this would happen because they were all just lying to each other yeah and it starts to get real dicey after that because during the final initiation this is where they get locked into a cage match where there's a weird name for it do you ever written down i figure what the revealing process the revealing process it's the revealing and that's a foundation of the commitment where each pair um will then ask each other questions and we get a fucking we get a like a fucking bombshell from caleb where he's sleeping with his mom's best friend yeah dude damn dude the pitted truth

brings out all brandon it brings out all um that's i laughed so hard in that scene just because the because they're they're asking each other questions and josh uh lucas is like uh he's like hey caleb what's the worst thing you've ever done? Trying to get him to admit that he killed. Well, the dude goes, stuck with my mom's best friend. Yeah. Ruined their marriage. It's amazing. But yeah. So,

so yeah, they're, they're screaming at each other a little bit in there. And then that's when coach T or not coach T coach, Craig T Nielsen calls them both up and is finally like, here's what happened. They give the adjusted story. Yeah, we get the second 25%. So we get filled up to about about 50 of the story where we realize there's a fight they struggled and uh caleb actually tried to help will but his shoe came through and will

fell and broke his neck yeah falls and we'd like to believe that's it dead yeah and um and then what's uh the cranky nelson is uh basically tries to buy um lucas off he's like we didn't go to the police because it would ruin um everybody's lives and the society so here is the full ride to any law school you ever want to go to or yale law school we said no he says any law school oh yeah any law school because he's not trying he's trying to go to harvard law he's not trying to go to yale um because yale law fucking sucks um but uh but yeah he's like here's a full ride completely paid already and he's like i haven't even applied to law school and i loved this line delivery that craig d nelson gives you well imagine that but so yeah tries to buy him off um this is and then after that he calls in his favor to the senator because we we like the senator told josh jackson a while back that he

has a favor um because the senator and cranky nelson while they are soulmates in the society, they're jostling for power. They're trying to one-up each other here. And this is where we find out that they don't destroy the tapes. They keep them all in a secret vault. Got to keep the blackmail, dude. Never delete anything. Exactly. And so we also get that the committee is going to vote to kick lucas out

um there's a steamy sex scene between lucas and chloe in the shower while they're trying to like you know not be hurt because yeah there's bugs everywhere um and then lucas goes in to steal the tapes. The senator kind of lays out the plan. He's like, hey, this is what you need to do. And yeah, so Lucas calls him the townie. The townie. Yeah. Cousin Sal would call him the degenerate trifecta. Exactly. degenerate trifecta exactly um and so they they come down they rappel down when this the like

like dude that security guard went through a lot he got maced he got tased he got jumped down on by the friends and beat up and they started then they started hitting uh shoot him again with the bat too yeah dude they kicked the shit out of um um and then uh yeah and then they watch the tape back and they see this is where they see shooter mcgavin coming in and will is still alive brandon he didn't die like caleb thought and shooter mcgavin actually crap you know unlike an acupuncturist he does not realign that well yeah so so what happens is after after um caleb tries to save him and he falls he calls his dad and he's like i think he's dead he broke his neck um like what do i do do i call the police he's like i should call the police right and that's when the dad's like no no no you can't call the police he sends shooter over

there shooter gets there and he's like you know what caleb i got this you go ahead and wander away go go you know go go take a quick five and then so caleb doesn't know that will is still alive when shooter got there and then shooter does the old neck break yeah um yep and then also so two two quick things before when they do before the they watch the video the secret society is doing their little vote and they're voting to send not only kick lucas out of the the order or the whatever but also send them to their psychiatric facility where they can control him um and then um before the before they watch the video they uh um what's lucas tries to do the old the old public breakup okey-doke to try to save chloe a little bit uh where they pretend to have a huge fight and that they're not talking to each other again. And that's

pre-steamy shower scene. No, that's post. Is it post? It's post that, but pre videotape watching. Gotcha. Either way, it's awesome. And then yeah, they go

and this is where Lucas goes to the detective office with the video and then the detective switches out yeah well he gets to the uh the detective he gets to the police station and caleb's there diming him out ratting him out yeah yeah and then yep and then he gives the detective the tape um and then the detective bring does the uh this is where we find out that the detective's in on it he's part of the society the fucking cops and the cia and the fbi and the fucking tsa they're all in on it heath yeah oh dude that's i'm telling you brandon we need don't even get me started on nato the who and the wef terrorist organization uh but the cop switches out the tape with a dummy tape

and then they uh joshua jackson freaks out they subdue him and then they throw him in the the psychiatric hospital they drug him up yeah and boy is he drugged he is drooling like a son of a gun and that did you notice that like that is all that was a lot of yeah there and then the whole the whole car ride because she uh her uh so so chloe and the senator like break him out yeah and again the senator's playing both sides the whole entire time here and don't forget chloe tells caleb while he's doing some boxing that um will wasn't dead keep going yeah yeah yeah yeah um and then during that whole drive uh josh is still all drugged up he's just sitting in the passenger seat yeah and they're in a fucking

car chase yeah fucking shooter coming out of nowhere oh my god and then they then then um the crash shooter gets out of the car starts beating up chloe and then he's getting ready to shoot everybody and that's when detective pops out and saves the day yeah and that's where we realize he shoots shooter yeah and uh you know this is where he gives him the clues and then him and chloe have to figure out the clues from the senator of what to do and they figure out the rules die by the rule and i wish i could do that the the entire time the senator is doing this ridiculous fucking southern accent and i wish i could i wish i could do it right now because it's amazing but i don't i don't have i don't have the vocal

capabilities can you can you can you copy his is no no i can't because it's like it's absurd it's like a weird wannabe knockoff like savannah accent it's like it's like... It's absurd. It's like a weird wannabe knockoff Savannah accent. It's like if you cross a Savannah accent with... What's the... What's the big giant chicken in Looney Tunes?

Oh, yeah. Foghorn Leghorn. It's like if you cross Foghorn Leghorn with a Savannah accent. I say, I say say don't go under there youngster i do declare yeah it's uh it's a ridiculous accent ridiculous um but yeah so so live by the rules die by the rules and more importantly heath our rules supersede the rules of the outside world yep and so that means they will settle this disagreement by any gentlemanly means you know that means he's a fucking yeah i knew it

was too the whole time as soon as i said i was like oh my god they're gonna fucking duel um and so they do brandon and this is where this is where we get the the thanksgiving line the thanksgiving day line and i was like this this all happened in fucking a month and a half god damn oh my god and and you know it just so yeah so he challenges caleb to the duel yeah and the weapons are fantastic like they literally have old dueling and because caleb is the challengee right or challenger yeah well and of course his this guy's psychopathic dad has been practice having him practice duels his whole life so you know preparing for this moment i mean you know what i always say he you stay ready you don't got to get ready that's that's very true and if your dad is the overlord

of a secret society you have to be prepared to duel at any time imperative that you stay ready he probably knows sword and pistol probably just in case you know like what if they go sword and he's been and he's on the boxing team you know yeah hand-to-hand combat yeah he's been ready for this um but then luke puts his gentleman's dueling gun down and he drops it immediately and it's like we can figure this out bro don't shoot me like let's you know we can figure this out yeah um and then uh cranky nelson starts screaming at him to shoot it shoot it yeah and and then eventually he gets ready to pick up the cause and shoot uh he runs grabs one of the other pistols and is gonna craig t nelson is gonna shoot uh lucas himself yeah and then caleb shoots his dad and then lucas sees caleb walking away with one of

the before that i had before that i have one last thing so he shoots his dad right and his dad he shoots him in like the like the top right like the right shoulder like top right chest essentially yeah and his dad's sitting there like agonizing in pain while everybody's rushing to help him and as he's as he's like on it, like on his deathbed, using his last breath and his last words, he looks up at his son. Granted his son did just shoot him, but still it's his last breath. And he looks up at his son and he goes, you were never worth it or something like that. Yeah. Like imagine I get,

I get that. He just shot you. I understand that. But imagine using your last breath and your last words to tell your son you hate him. That'll make him grab one of those pistols and go try and finish it real quick. But then Josh Jackson saves him. He stops the... It's over, Caleb. It's over. And then this is where he's meeting with the senator.

And I wrote this line in all caps because if it's secret and elite it can't be good and this is where the the senator is all he's all pumped because now he he's cranky nelson he doesn't die right i don't think he dies but he's no i don't think so he's he he's marred in the scandal so he loses his his uh his judge position he loses his position within the secret society and so the senator can take over and so he's all pumped and he says the line the good guys won because yes you are the dude who's been playing both sides and manipulating everybody from the beginning is definitely the good guy. Yep, absolutely.

And then, you know, Josh walks out on him and then Luke and Chloe are in love forever. He does. So I did actually really love that little interaction that they have. I wish they would have ended it with um Joshua Jackson's line instead of because essentially the the senator is like you owe me now um you can like I'll let you in the the society back into the society you can be my right hand man you owe me and Joshua Jackson's like I don't want to be a part of this and he's like well you can't leave because you owe me uh and I'm gonna call in these favors and you better do it otherwise you know your family's gonna get killed i don't think you can live with that kind of fear and doubt

and joshua jackson's line which i wish they would have ended it here as he goes watch me and then he walks away and then the the senator guy what's he say he says well done but or well done son well done son well done they should have ended it on watch me though that would have been great yeah real emphatic you know um let's pop into our cakey ratings brandon because we've talked about this movie we got kiddie ratings and i got a couple i got a couple fun facts hit us with the fun facts and then we'll cakey rating it up so i mentioned one earlier that the director rob cohen went to harvard he went to these ivy league schools and he i couldn't figure out if he was a member of the societies but he

definitely um rode with that kind of crew you know so it's you know very it's a very self-indulgent film which is why you don't get a lot of not a lot of secrets um this film was uh featured on roger ebert's most hated film list all right okay all right that's not surprising it was not not critically received well at all in fact if you go to rotten tomatoes and you look at the critic score heath would you venture a guess what what the rating is 2.84 oh it's not that bad nine percent nine percent oh so bad yeah not quite it wasn't super great it was not a super great movie because audience audience score 43 yeah it's i remember this movie being this movie being good as a when i was younger but now watching it back it was it was not super great

and it really started unraveling at the end the the plot is not not very succinct there's a lot of a lot of plot holes a lot of logic issues yeah um and the the tone is kind of all over the place yeah it's like about like these real secret societies but everything is like brightly lit and like kind of golden colored um so like the tones don't always match it's um yeah it wasn't the best thing it did it did make money though it was a it was a success financially that's not surprising it made uh so the budget was 35 million and worldwide gross $50 million. So it made almost double. This is one of those movies when it came out, you had to go watch it. You had to.

Had to. And it had two direct-to-DVD sequels. There's a Skulls 2 and a Skulls 3. Yeah. I never got down with them, but, man. I have not seen them either. But, yeah. Fun facts for you. K yeah, fun facts for you.

Kiki, hit me, Heath. Hit me. I remember this movie being better than it was. I was not super into it throughout, actually, even though I like it. So I'm going to rate it a little bit normal than I usually do. And I'm going to go 2.73. Damn, okay. 2.73 damn okay 2.73 yeah I was not like this

this might oh wait no okay this well this might be hold on I'm looking back at the numbers here this might be the oh no it's the second okay I said this is this is only the second movie that I am going to rate higher than you

the the other movie was the breakfast club um but so you gave it a 2.73 right yeah damn that's a that's a rough score from heath that's a dude i i'm telling you like they i everything about this movie should have been so much better than law 4.1 just to remind everybody that's because son-in-law is exactly what it should be it is fantastic it's my favorite thanksgiving movie it's all those things this movie this is a thanksgiving movie this this movie could have been a 4.8 if the like it wouldn't have come so unraveled so weirdly yeah if we tighten it up a little bit it could have been way better and if they would have actually like made the secret societies look like the dark

sick sociopaths that they are like they let these fuckers off the hook like i don't know i just i they should have been meaner to the secret societies because they're all trap elite trash crap people and they should have like that the plot should have been like so much better towards the end but it just i don't know it just it unravels yeah and i wanted it to be so much better and i remember it being so much better so i think that that also factors into is like i remember this movie being so cool and then i watched it back and i was like oh it's really kind of it doesn't so it doesn't suck it's not it's not a it's not a great movie or i mean it's an okay movie um i don't mind terrible movies though as long as it's like as long as it's like moving and it's not like a slog to get through i'm good and this movie to be better this movie is not great but it

moves along it's not like it's just not agonizing to watch like buddy games um it wasn't bad i just wanted it to be better yeah that's why my score is. I mean, it's just... I think that's one of your lowest scores. what's your score, Brayman? I gave it a 3.3. Oh.

3.3. That is surprisingly generous for you. Very run-of-the-mill. Like I said, it's very easy to watch. that is surprisingly generous very run-of-the-mill like i said because i i mean i'm it was it's very easy to watch like it's the plot holes are not so terrible that you like it takes you out of it as long as you like you know it keeps pushing through there's no like there's no egregious airs or anything like that the acting is real good the the cast is fantastic if if if you

if the cast was not nearly as stacked and good as it is it would have been way worse this is this is a movie that is that's true carried by the actors um that is true it's carried by josh it's carried by i like i said paul walker is is neither here nor there when it comes to acting ability but um everybody else is they're doing the real heavy lifting where the the plot kind of falls apart so yeah and like i said this is part of my score is the unrealistic expectations that i set for this movie of it being awesome you know like literally like i literally was like oh my god this is gonna be fucking awesome what a great way to spend my afternoon i'm gonna watch this movie i haven't seen it

forever it's so cool it's a great story and like all these and then as i kept watching and watching i was like why did i think this movie was so cool as a kid like it's fine but it wasn't all that you know and and then that's when I started getting mad at it. And that's there. There's my score. That's the justification of my score. Brandon is that I remember it being so much better than it was. It's a, I mean, it's a, it's a solid score.

I don't, it's, I don't just like, it's not egregious or anything. I don't disagree with it. It's just, you know, I was not, I was not prepared. Very rarely do you, do I score a movie higher than you yeah yeah this is just it just it it hit all my nostalgia in the wrong ways because i like i said i remembered it because it wasn't like one of those like you know movies you look back on you're like yeah it was a good movie but it wasn't great so i enjoy watching it i just i had put it up on this pedestal and it was it didn't live up to the

pedestal i put it on understand so that happened it's like why you never meet your heroes right it's the same kind of thing fair enough in philosophy you know they're probably gonna let you down i was i was a little we didn't get nearly as much conspiracy heath as i was hoping for though you well i tried to tone it down i really didn't want to go too far off the rails. This is the one to – this is the movie to go off the rails in, though. Listen, all I have to say is – It's not like when you went on the conspiracy theory rant in the Sandlot and we were like, okay, we're talking about baseball here. This episode is taking a bit longer than I wanted it to, and I will just coach all of our listeners to go look up the declassified CIA documents, hop on the website for the National Treasury

and take a look, take a read. Keep your eyes open. I wouldn't recommend it as leisurely reading. You're not going to find a lot of leisure after you read some of those documents. You're going to find a lot of leisure after you read some of those documents you're gonna find a lot of anxiety and a lot of concern because you realize that you are merely an ant you know dave matthews talked about it you are merely an ant marching along and there are a lot of big boots out there getting ready to step on you just ask the fucking poor people of hawaii you know there's a ton of money grab if i've ever seen one

anyways we'll end it on that there's a ton of uh we'll end it there's a ton of big boots out there ready to stomp you um oh yeah definitely like he said keep your eyes open read all you can but also be careful what you read don't you don't want to end up on a list here you know because like what it's like they say when they're when they're letting everybody out of the coffins the the two hooded figures they say we've been watching and we will be watching oh well i mean listen you know i already know based on like the insane tiktoks that rabbit holes that i go down there is i am one million percent being watched by because our government wastes money on idiots like me that they don't need to be watching but

based on my you know social media activity they're they're going to be watching me and you know that's i would i would always i would argue based on your your sanity party nonsense. They should be watching. Because I am going to start a party. I'm going to rename it now. I'm going to call it the Jenkins and Josie party.

It's better. Should I shorten it? J&J party? There you go. Just JJ party. The JJ party? Okay. My motto and jay party there you go all right just jj party jj the jj party okay that's in in my motto is we we will treat the office we or we will leave the world a better place for all the sweet souls like um these two little pups yeah that's better than sanity party because like i said there's nothing there's nothing less sane than telling people how sane you are exactly listen you guys i'm not i'm not fucking crazy okay

but birds aren't real at this point i just you know i i try to talk to my phone in a way that gives me ads that I appreciate. Thanks for listening, everyone. Please remember to follow and like us on Instagram at TheCakeEatersPod, on Twitter at TheCakeEaters. Also reach out to us via email, TheCakeEatersPod at gmail.com or visit our website, TheCcakeeaterspod.com.