The Cake Eaters - 70. Rollerball

Episode Date: November 7, 2023

On today's episode, Heath and Brandon dive headfirst into the 1975 classic Rollerball! The boys talk through the rules and logistics of the game of Rollerball, Bob Miller's stellar commentary,... the hardcore 'Dad Vibes' that this movie gives off, dystopian futures, man butts, and how this movie doesn't even try to explain itself. Follow us at www.thecakeaterspod.com and on Twitter (@thecakeeaters) and Instagram (@thecakeeaterspod) Email us at thecakeeaterspod@gmail.com

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Starting point is 00:00:00 What does possible sound like for your business? It's having to spend to power your scale with no preset spending limit. Redefine possible with Business Platinum. That's the powerful backing of American Express. Terms and conditions apply. Visit amex.ca slash business platinum. It's not worth winning if you can't win. Jonathan, Jonathan, Jonathan, Jonathan, Jonathan, Jonathan, Jonathan! Welcome to the KKJs, everybody. My name is Brandon. I've got Heath with me. Sweet dreams, Heath. That's your new nickname. That's what I'm going to call you.
Starting point is 00:00:57 Because you're giving pills to everybody, Heath. Good night, ladies and gentlemen we are here to lull you to sleep with the beautiful beautiful rhapsodies of our voices talking about the one and only rollerball the original 1975 rollerball now you may be asking what the hell does rollerball have to do with the mighty ducks and honestly it's a very fair question I asked myself that question 10 times while watching the movie because I kept forgetting yeah well because you along with probably everybody else in the world is forgetting about my beloved Bob Miller who was the the radio and game announcer from D1 and D2 he did the radio announcement d1 the voice of the ducks actually
Starting point is 00:01:47 he was he was he was technically in his real life outside of hollywood he was the voice of the los angeles kings who are the the rivals of the anaheim ducks but that's neither here nor there well you can we can forgive his treachery you know this you know because especially when we get him calling some of these rollerball games because i was all in one one million percent into these games they had me at the edge of my seat who the fuck was gonna win where the fuck was this going so so uh so bob miller who who is the the radio announcers uh from d1 and d who is the radio announcers from D1 and D2, is the game announcer for Rollerball. He's known as RD.
Starting point is 00:02:34 RD. He's the greatest Rollerball announcer. I couldn't tell if he was the voice of Houston Rollerball or if he was just the voice of rollerball in general i'm assuming just roller ball in general i'm assuming the voice of rollerball you know like he had very you know marv albert for the nba in the 90s you know speaking of which so rd does the game announcing the pre-game announcer for rollerball is dick enberg he's dick inberg's the first voice you hear in this movie and and it's fantastic i was i was they had me hook line and sinker as soon as they were setting
Starting point is 00:03:14 up for this game i was like oh so for okay opening credits where are we going with this there are first of all behind the scenes set up there are no there are no opening credits it just has the title run second it's a five second it's just the title run and so i wrote this down the for anybody who hasn't seen this movie the first 15 minutes of this movie is just a roller ball game there's no credits there's no running credits because i was waiting for those i was like obviously they're going to do some credits in here nope they don't do any of that there is the announcer zero plot explanation zero exposition the announcers say nothing they could have they could have explained the rules they could have explained like divisional matchups like how we got here so this is how we got here so bob says
Starting point is 00:04:01 houston defeats you know what i mean like they win their division they could have fucking done anything they give us a couple tidbits bob explains some rules um at the beginning and then they also give us a little tidbit because they we stand for the corporate anthem um yeah but other than that other than that it's 15 minutes rock and vanguard the rulers of america well it's uh is that too much is that too far are we gonna i shouldn't the it's 15 minutes rock and vanguard the rulers of america well it's uh is that too much is that too far are we gonna i shouldn't it's rci energy he's oh okay sorry sorry he's he's the because the corporation not only owns the rollerball team it also owns the city of houston possibly yeah i think so probably probably the greater south, you know, like Texas. They probably got Texas, Arizona, New Mexico, part of probably northern Mexico, potentially. Like because they said the corporate wars like there's like the corporate wars.
Starting point is 00:04:56 Like I feel like there's like huge swaths of land that certain corporations own. Cletus later on, not to jump ahead ahead but cleatus later on gives us what little exposition they give us and it's fucking nonsense you can't make heads or tails of it but he starts talking about how corporations own cities and each city like houston's an energy city chicago is a food city yeah and he goes off of that and then he yeah so we get the overlords of all those they don't ever they don't ever explain anything seven remember or maybe it's just the seven gms because remember there's like the meeting with him and it's like approve i think that was just the energy corporation that
Starting point is 00:05:36 was the board for the energy corporation when they're oh and like how they were gonna dispatch okay okay we can get back to the game but like this like i was in they're setting up the game they're getting the clock ready like they're when when they bring out the two medical dudes with the stretcher i was like oh shit it is fucking on like what is happening right now they prepped the stretcher and got it as close to the field as possible before the game started they knew what was happening oh my god i loved Wait. We can't spend five seconds running to the back to get this. We got to bring this. We're going to need this right away.
Starting point is 00:06:11 I have to say this, too. I was watching this last night, and Kelly, bless her heart, went upstairs so that she could just chill and watch normal TV. And she came down to make some food. And she came down towards the end when it was the death game and she just paused halfway down the stairs and was like hey you know i'm not getting a really good energy from this movie so can you let me know when it's over i'm gonna go back upstairs you're not wrong you're not you're not gonna get a good energy during the get to the death game this is the
Starting point is 00:06:46 ultimate fantastic this is the ultimate good vibes movie dude oh my god that's that's coming from the guy that said the song in the summer goes and it's too much yelling to be a summery song. You don't yell in the summer. This is a good vibes movie. This is the movie of the summer. Rollerball movie of the summer. Okay, hold on. I will not actually not argue with you there.
Starting point is 00:07:20 I got so into this. Literally the first hour, was like fuck this was a really big missed opportunity when big mike was here to just hang out with my dad and watch this movie oh my god he would have fucking loved it i feel like i might re-watch it with him when i go back like big mike have you seen rollerball oh i bet you he has but he has too but i bet you it's been a really long time and he would be like oh oh, I remember this movie like death blow with the spikes on the gloves. Like the spike gloves did. Dude, they'd pop the helmets off the guys and just death blow them.
Starting point is 00:07:55 Oh, my. It was everything about those games. When they when they just not to skip ahead again, but when they punch Moon Pie, that's an execution scene. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It was really tough to watch, actually. It was insane. And watching him watch them and then watch him with zero reaction.
Starting point is 00:08:17 He's like, well, I guess I'm going to have to kill these people now because they just maimed my friend permanently. Eye for an eye, man. But Moonpie's whole job was to either kill or maim. He would go and cheap shot the bikers and take the penalties. That was Houston's philosophy. They would cheap shot the bikers. Multiple times he kicked people in the face. And other times he was using his spiked glove to punch through their helmet. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:08:50 Moonpie. I was, I didn't trust Moonpie from the second I fucking saw him with that scar on his cheek. I was waiting for a Moonpie heel turn. Yeah. Well, there was no, I was not waiting for the Moonpie heel turn. I was waiting. I thought that's how they were gonna, like, they were gonna, like, get Moon Pie to turn on him
Starting point is 00:09:08 and Moon Pie was gonna kill him or something. I was waiting for it. When's the last time you've watched Bloodsport? That's what I saw the whole time. Like, I knew that this dude and Moon Pie were gonna be tight, and then eventually Moon Pie was gonna... No, you can't compare Moon Pie
Starting point is 00:09:21 to the Revenge of the Nerds guy from Bloodsport. Those are two wildly different energies. Moonpie is a fucking sociopath. No, no, no. I'm not saying they're the same people. I'm saying the story arc is similar, where it's like, this is this person I'm really close to, but in a hot-headed moment, it's going to get... And that's what happened, right? Like, Moonpie was just not watching his six.
Starting point is 00:09:49 And then those three guys running up on him. And then, dude, Moonpie going down. All right. I legitimately thought he was going to turn, though. I was waiting for the hill turn. Good for him for not turning. But I was waiting for it with bated breath. I was like, oh, now here it is. We got to go back to this first game and set it up for the listeners that there
Starting point is 00:10:08 was when you come in we're setting up for the game they jump into the game and there's no explanation or rules you have no idea what's going on other than they're playing this fucking game. So in this game, think of a roller derby rink with the incline, right? Yeah. Roller derby rink. Everybody's on roller skates. But it's bigger. It's a lot bigger because they've got the motorcycle guys to get people moving faster. I was going to say everybody's on roller skates except for like three people who are on bikes.
Starting point is 00:10:41 There's two bikes on each side. Okay. Two bikes on each side. There's two bikes. That's what I saw. That's what I observed. There's two bikes on each side. Okay. Two bikes on each side. There's two bikes. That's what I saw. That's what I observed. There were no rules. There were no explanations as to what the bikes did, what they could or couldn't do.
Starting point is 00:10:53 But, like, there were no rules. Like, they eventually threw the rules out of the game. So do you think that they were just like, hey, we're going to do away with the rules after the first game. So, like, let's just not even throw them in there no so i i doing some research after i watched this movie i came across a thing where it said the they like legitimately came up with a whole fucking rule book and games and it was so um i'm trying to remember the phrase but it was so it was such like a real actual sport that these the the actors and the crew would play it in between takes would literally play rollerball in between takes. They just wouldn't kill each other, obviously.
Starting point is 00:11:36 But thank you. Thank you, Brandon. I had no idea. Yeah, but apparently they they it was such a concise rule book they were able to play it they just never relayed any of that information to the viewer they don't relay any information that you there's a lot of like like like you're guessing the entire yeah a lot of mental leaps you gotta make if you are not paying attention if you are not like listening i would argue conversation you're
Starting point is 00:12:06 not gonna like follow i would argue even if you're paying 100 attention and you're listening to every conversation you're not gonna follow it there was god we keep bouncing all over the place but like the spot in the middle where like all of a sudden he's just like going to this library and like trying to find like information but like you never but they they lost the entire 13th century oh my god yes and like the fact he's like well what do you want to know i want to know why they make the decisions they make like what a stupid fucking question to ask a computer a computer is not going to be able to tell you why people are making anyways if there's there that whole thing was like god damn it i don't know why you're doing this go back to the rollerball there are so many lines piling onto this computer thing where
Starting point is 00:13:00 where we look yeah you he goes to the computer bank and we learn nothing zero except that the guy that the librarian that runs the computer has been isolated down there for too long he's insane yeah like he's actually like he's been isolated down there for too long he's been speaking to this computer that's not a real question zero oh my gosh yeah and they didn't even know where ai could go back then right now but we don't learn we don't learn anything from the computer and that's where we're going a computer ai computer is going to be running our country with some insane scientists like in a bunker somewhere kicking it just kicking it and us these ants you know this is what dave matthews band was talking about brandon we're just ants marching fucking along man but what what i want
Starting point is 00:13:51 to say disaster what i want to say though is there we don't learn anything from the computer they have that line where we lost the 13th century which doesn't have any like it's such a throwaway line it means nothing to anything and there's beats on it there's so many lines like that where it's like that doesn't mean anything like there's one line to go back a little bit where they're at the party yeah they show this scene where it's two guys two executives we've never seen before yeah and they're talking to each other and they go they go did you hear what happened to evans they're gonna they're gonna get rid of evans and it's like who the fuck is evans we've never been in evans there's no evans that's ever mentioned and it never comes back it never like we don't meet evans we don't
Starting point is 00:14:34 see like i was like what the fuck is that like is is this did the old dude try like sniff out that someone was trying to take him out did like the little side piece dude i forget who the uh the star wars dude yeah he's oh my god i could i was just gonna ask you if you remembered where he from or if you looked up where he was from he's the uh he's the one that gets choked i guess choked yeah by north feeder you're but dude like that evans line threw me off because i was like at i was like who the fuck is evans and then it never comes back at first i was thinking maybe they're talking about jonathan maybe that's what the e stands for is evans but that like we never there's never any confirmation of that there's no mention of evans ever again that that line annoyed the out of me i was like you gotta be kidding like what are we throwing these lines in for no reason it i mean all of it was so insane it's it was it truly is this like i i
Starting point is 00:15:39 also love that the game that they that they started with they started in the playoffs but they didn't really explain it was the playoffs. Not until the shower scene. Not until. Yeah. So we get this game, and it's Houston versus Madrid. And so I instantly, when I see Houston versus Madrid, I think like, you know,
Starting point is 00:15:58 the soccer friendlies that they've started doing with the MLS. Like, I thought it was like that, like a friendly. And then I went very quickly. There's no friendlies in roller very very very quickly realized that nothing was friendly but like nothing was set up so i was and also to be fair leading up to this movie i kept getting rollerball and roll bounce confused in my brain and so when i saw the people not like skate dancing and instead skate murdering i i had to like very quickly take that you know 180 degrees you had to switch you had to switch to good vibes mode oh my god i had to switch gears very quickly like i was thinking like oh this is this is uh the movie the Lil Bow Wow remade.
Starting point is 00:16:45 And he's like doing disco to the rollerball. And so he's at the rollerball doing disco. And then it was just, you know, Dennis Quaid out there murdering everybody. Or not Dennis Quaid. Dennis Quaid.
Starting point is 00:17:01 It's definitely not Dennis Quaid. James Caan is the main guy the dad yeah I don't boy was I way off with Dennis Quaid I'm so sorry I don't know where my brain was going but yeah Buddy the Elf's dad Dennis Quaid could have been in this movie
Starting point is 00:17:18 I mean Dennis Quaid is fantastic but it's just I don't know I don't know why James Quaid and I even even when fantastic, but it's just, I don't know. I don't know why. James Caan. And I even said, like, even when the movie started, it's like, oh, James Caan in a, I'm going to like, just in a badass athlete murderer role. Kind of cool. Kind of sweet. It's right up his alley.
Starting point is 00:17:37 He is. What are some of his, what are some of his other movies? I'm blanking on him real quick. Hold on. Oh, he, I mean, him, he's, he's in a whole bunch from this time period, like the late 60s up through the 70s and 80s. Godfather. Yeah, Godfather.
Starting point is 00:17:55 His son, also a renowned actor. Are you a big Scott Conn guy? What's Scott Conn in? He plays Tweeter in Varsity Blues. Oh, okay, yeah. Tweeter was fantastic in Varsity Blues. And then he's also, the other one I know him from is, did you ever see Into the Blue with Jessica, is it Jessica Alba?
Starting point is 00:18:19 Oh, yeah, you're right. And my boy Paul Walker. Yeah, absolutely. How could you, all those movies. Yeah, he's you're right. And my boy, Paul Walker. Yeah, absolutely. How could you? All those movies. Yeah, he's in that one. He plays Paul Walker's best friend who ruins everything. Yeah, typical. Classic Scott Conn, dude.
Starting point is 00:18:36 The Conns are an interesting family. A lot of trouble with those guys. A lot of drug use. Well, I mean, Hollywood can't blame them. Too sure. 90% of the populace if they had the access to it
Starting point is 00:18:54 would. You're taking dream pills all the time, dude. Dude, those dream pills like I just kept imagining like Jonathan just tripped out while playing i think it's the only way around i think that's why he's so good as everybody else is all tripped out and he's focused he's locked in you know yeah okay like they're all nervous they're all
Starting point is 00:19:20 overthinking and he's just riding the wave of good vibes throughout rollerball. Just, you know, there's multiple times in the movie where he screams, I love this game. Yep. Yep. And dude,
Starting point is 00:19:32 his, the precision of his punches with those knuckles to like, get it right in between the face mask of, and I love that they have like the 19, like a seventies, like helmets. Yeah. So,
Starting point is 00:19:50 so for, we haven't talked about the game at all, but so, Oh my God, there's too many things to talk about. So everybody's such a good move. Yeah. But so everybody's on rollerblades,
Starting point is 00:19:59 except there's like two or three biker guys on each team. Everybody has spiked gloves, like metal spiked gloves except for the receivers of the rollerball which have like a like a weird ass mitt yeah well it's like a it's like a catcher's mitt that's like attached to like a like metal like guard because remember that ball's heavy and it's solid steel yeah and it shoots out at like what they say like 10 15 miles an hour 20 miles an hour oh fuck okay that's why it spins around at like what they say, like 10, 15 miles an hour, 20 miles an hour. Oh fuck.
Starting point is 00:20:27 Okay. That's why it spins around on the thing, dude. It's like, it's like, it's like a combination of pinball. Yeah. It's,
Starting point is 00:20:36 but, but they're also wearing, they're also wearing like shoulder pads and protect like chest protectors and football helmets, like 1970s, like the kicker two bar style yeah so there's so there's a big gap in between where you can like punch in with precision and break you think they would have covered that up you know you think you you would have thought after the first person took a spike to the face they'd have been like maybe we throw
Starting point is 00:21:02 an extra bar up here brandon you are you just looked at it from a lens of player safety that's well i mean that's the exact the exact point is you have and they want an opening for someone to then why have a helmet at all just let them go fucking bareheaded it's the illusion it's the illusion of the like it's the illusion of the american dream brandon that it's out there that it can be achieved that safety is available but really in reality we know it's not it's not available not unless you come from like a certain 20 families unless you're part of the corporation then yeah you know unless you're in, get a bot in, they can steal your wife.
Starting point is 00:21:48 So I, so very rarely when we've done this podcast, have I come, have I come into a movie having not seen it before? The only, the only other time I think that happened was with love, love, always Santa where I hadn't seen it before. So when I came into this,
Starting point is 00:22:05 like the first 15 minutes was nothing but the rollerball game. I was like, I'm in, I don't know what's going on. I know I'm never going to know what's going on, but I'm in, I'm all in. I had no expectations other than,
Starting point is 00:22:17 like I said, I got this one confused with the other one. And so like right away it got me. Cause I was like, Oh shit. I, I got, what is this movie movie and then they started playing and i was like oh my god this is fantastic and then like you i was so busy trying to figure out what the fuck was going on like what was going on in this game what were the rules okay so that guy's receiving the ball is like okay
Starting point is 00:22:45 so it's like a heavy ball and then like the only thing they explained really is that they had to show it right they're like and he shows the ball and you're like why you can't like put it in your pocket you gotta yeah you can't hide it it has to be available to be stolen yeah yep no hidden ball trick they the other team has to know where to go to be able to, to form the counterattack. And did you notice that like, as soon as the, you know, cause if you retrieve the ball, you get to go on offense, the other team goes on defense and then there's that red patch. There's like a red pizza slice in the roller ball track that where the goal is. And usually the defense kind of forms a line
Starting point is 00:23:26 yep exactly but if did you notice if the skater gets like tripped up and goes down in that he can still climb up with the rollerball and like you can drop in the thing you can drop the ball the ball can go on the ground but because it's at that roller derby slant the bottom area they kept calling the gutter if it falls down to that area then it's dead ball we start over a new one shot across the ground so you can drop it you can fall as long as the ball doesn't roll down to that gutter it's still alive we're good man it was i loved everything about it like it was the insane absolutely grips on the way they figured out how to like grip and run up that when they would fall I loved everything about it. It was insane. Absolutely insane. The way they figured out how to grip and run up that when they would fall down with the ball to dodge.
Starting point is 00:24:11 Did you notice there was suction? And then they explained to not put your hand in front of the ball when you try to pound it in there because that steel ball, it'll just rip your hand off. I love how they're all, what's it called? Hitching, right? With the bikes where they're holding on to the back and just getting slung shot. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:24:33 Slingshotted. That was fantastic. Then you had the snipers from up top. That was Moon Pie that would just come in and wipe dudes out. It was just everything. And the really low scoring very very soccer style score and i think the first game was like what three one when it ended i think yeah i know it was three one three one yeah yeah and so like super low scoring but you know but
Starting point is 00:24:58 it's also very um action-packed though at least for the the first game a very action-packed though at least for the the first game i'm very action-packed the first game they do it's set up similar to hockey where it's three periods 20 minutes a piece um at least for the the first game you know then then we start changing time limits and and shit um and uh the substitution is is very much hockey um hockey base where the you're kind of like line changes you're just coming in and out they don't there's no like stopping it it's just um like line changes um yeah yeah so they win that first game three to one then we get to we we get to um the post-game showers lots of man butts lots of man butts, lots of man butts. And I couldn't tell.
Starting point is 00:25:47 I put that in my notes too. I was like, it was, you knew there was going to be something though, right? Like that was like a seventies, eighties staple. I thought it was going to be boobs, but it ended up just being man butt. I was expecting, I was a hundred percent expecting some boobs and it was very disappointed that there weren't any. Yeah. Like I, I watched old school the other day there's a lot more boobs in that than i remembered but i was for sure expecting boobs with the system they set up where we're just we're swapping women out every six
Starting point is 00:26:15 months oh my stars like these poor ladies they're just you know oh poor ladies so okay okay well we'll get to that i need we need to talk about the shower scene first though you know? Oh, poor ladies. So, okay. Okay. Well, we'll get to that. I need it. We need to talk about the shower scene first though, because there was also man butts,
Starting point is 00:26:37 but then moon pie and Jonathan and the, the other guy, I'm blanking on the, the other guy's name. Cause they move on, they beat Madrid. They're moving on to the next round in the playoffs. And they're talking about their next opponent. And their opponent is the tokyo were they the samurais there's no nicknames it's just the city just tokyo but the reason you're thinking samurais is because
Starting point is 00:26:57 jonathan they're describing how they describe their style they're describing and they're describing them and moon pie calls them short like 15 times he's like they're the shortest people in the world and then uh and jonathan says that describes them as having like a samurai spirit to them it's just like that's what it is and and like just like classic style yeah it's like classic 70s just over stereotyping every stereotype racism just like you know uh it was crazy god and that line that line dropped me though when he described them as having like samurai spirit i was like no okay here we go here we go that tokyo crowd though. Tokyo, victory. Tokyo, victory. That's for me.
Starting point is 00:27:46 Tokyo, victory. They were fucking in it. The chance. That was a tough away game for Houston. I can't believe they won. The chance throughout this movie were insane. I know we talked about this, and you had no issue with it, but them chanting Jonathanathan threw me off
Starting point is 00:28:06 i was like just chant jonathan john why are we chanting full full names just go john he doesn't go by john he doesn't he's it's not a chill game you know it's jonathan you know the corporations assigned him then you go john then you go to the tokyo game and they're chanting tokyo victory um there's a couple they're also chanting jonathan they are you get some jonathan chance like even from the away crowd and that's what the corporations are like fuck but then then we go to the new york game and not only are the fans chanting jonathan dead, but the other team is chanting Jonathan's dead. Amazing. But in the end,
Starting point is 00:28:53 the lap, the like three, like he just skates faster, not spoiler alert, but at the end when everyone dies and he's just skating faster and faster for like three laps. He's doing a victory lap. Yeah, laps of victory.
Starting point is 00:29:06 That was amazing. You know, the death match is finished. It's just Jonathan. Yes! Yes! I have defeated the corporations! You know he's just dead after that. Nothing changed.
Starting point is 00:29:21 I have in my notes, not to skip all the way to the end, but I have in my notes, skip all the way to the end, but I have in my notes, what happens after this? Are we... Does he do all this just to retire at the end of the season? Oh, he gets retired, Brandon. He gets retired right after the game. He gets retired by the corporations
Starting point is 00:29:39 and has a sudden heart attack and dies from his dreams. They're not doing that. They made that very clear. They're not going to do that because it was too suspicious. They don't want to martyr him. They have a full long conversation about that where they can't do anything. But they're just going to put him out to pasture.
Starting point is 00:29:54 In my notes, I have I would love a sequel where it's the entire next season and it's every game they're just trying to kill him again. He just keeps going. And they change the rules to every game they're just trying to kill him again. He just keeps going. And they change the rules to every game. Anyone who starts with a J does not get spiked gloves anymore.
Starting point is 00:30:14 Yeah. But so after the shower scene, after we get the incredibly racist conversation, it cuts to him going back to his uh or talking to the bartholomew and this is where they he's like the the evil corporation guys like hey you need to retire you're done so bro you're done so but he's very cryptic about it he won't tell jonathan no one knows why no one knows why they want jonathan to retire they just need him to fucking retire like get out of here bud yep you know we get a we get a real close-up on those eyebrows yeah and then so then he goes
Starting point is 00:30:53 he goes jonathan says no i'm not i'm not doing it i'm not i'm i'm powering through no matter how many people die because of me i'm powering through this fucking rollerball game yeah so then he goes back to the he goes back to the ranch which is where we meet what the the first of our ladies here yeah and then i cycled out six months cletus buddy cletus that just lives with him or something is he just like it's like he was visiting you know well he was in all those pictures and stuff and in all the memories they're best fucking friends man you don't have pictures of your best friends I mean not really I'm not much of a picture guy it's actually
Starting point is 00:31:31 sad I have actually do we I don't think we have any pictures together Brandon we hang out all the time I don't take I don't take pictures with anybody and it's not like I unless unless you're my aunt and it's your birthday i'm not taking a photo with you yeah like i can't i can't like outside of my family or kelly i can't like you know and like literally i think the last time i was like hey can you take a picture was when you took a
Starting point is 00:32:00 picture of like me and kelly and her brother and mace at the rock i think that was the last picture i had someone to take him so you know there you go but uh yeah so calidas is there um well he gets there and daphne's the name of the first girl the first girl and she's like she drops like these weird little lines where she's like we've had we've had a great six months together yeah now i got a letter that i need to leave um and he's oh oh wow that sucks but yeah yeah you should leave wow wow well she's all but hurt because he can't he's still hung up on his wife and you know she gave she and she's like no matter what i do you'll never love me like he loved her basically.
Starting point is 00:32:46 Well, she got – yeah, this is where – You can't blame her for it, right? And you can't blame him either. We do have to talk. So to go back just a bit to where he's talking to the energy guy, the head guy, he drops a line. He drops a line when he's talking because the energy guy is like, we need you to retire. Like we'll do whatever we like we need you to retire like we'll do whatever we can to get you to retire and he was like i need to see my wife my wife that you stole from me and gave to somebody else gave to a gave to an executive who coveted her yeah and then the the
Starting point is 00:33:17 head guy goes oh no we can't do that that's you're asking a bit much there buddy like you know like yeah i can i can make some things happen but i can't make everything happen you know um yeah but so so daph daphne's trying to yeah daphne's like i can't connect with you because you're still not over your stolen wife um and then she she stays the rest of the night with cletus and it's a very awkward very awkward like um throuple we got going on with cletus and daphne and jonathan jonathan is like explaining to cletus to like investigate answers yeah well this is when cletus drops his like cryptic past um you know his like spirit guide shit where he's like back in my day yeah what did he said no he he was like i grew up i i was alive and i grew up on he was alive
Starting point is 00:34:14 fucking memories were they so he grew up um when he was a kid it was before the corporate wars so he mentions they still had three nations there were three nations yeah and then the corporate wars started the nations went away it was just individual cities that were owned by the corporations and this is when he talks about houston's an energy city chicago is a food city yeah he lists a couple other ones um and then he talks about how he was you know then i just took shit because I was so into the movie even though I know it doesn't sound like
Starting point is 00:34:48 it was meant to be an exposition dump to get us caught up a little bit but it only gave us 10% of what we needed of what we're trying to figure out it never throughout the rest of the movie fills in the other 90% and the worst part about it is that they have a whole bunch of conversations that mean nothing that could have been used to help like explain.
Starting point is 00:35:14 It would have brought you in even more, right? Like if you understood why the corporations were making the decisions they were like, why that's the most frustrating such an important piece of like keeping the populace at bay like you know that's what hunger games did right like it was very hunger games ask yeah like hunger games explained why the hunger games were crucial at keeping the population subdued exactly like that was the most frustrating part for me because in a lot of these like futuristic you know dystopian movies they dump so much rationale and like background on you and it's all most of the time it's like that's like that's stupid it's too much sometimes they do too much whereas this one i was like this sounds interesting
Starting point is 00:35:57 i would love to know more please tell me more yeah and and like why was it so necessary to just change the game so that everyone started dying why well because they're because they're trying to kill jonathan well i know that but like it just i guess they were just gonna anyone that fell in the wake of killing jonathan that makes sense yeah yeah it's all bodies you know know? What's the individualism that's futile, right? Yeah. Yeah. And that was the whole point. The coach, the coach of Houston.
Starting point is 00:36:31 What do you think about him? I love that, dude. He's just like, why don't you just quit, bro? Fucking quit. Just retire. Save us all the trouble, Jonathan, and retire, please. Like, you are doing these men no favors by continuing to play. You are killing them.
Starting point is 00:36:49 Their blood is on your hands, Jonathan. They keep turning off the rules because of you. You could go retire and have a new mistress every six months, you sick son of a bitch. What is wrong with you, right? That's the coach the whole time. The best part is whenever he's in like a public setting where he knows like people are listening, he's always like quick to defend.
Starting point is 00:37:10 He's like, oh, the rules are always changing. They're always changing rules. That's nothing new there. They're always changing rules. The last game when the New York coach is like saying something about the game and he's like what game and the new york coach is like like a day like it dawns on the new york coach for the first time it's not a game it's we have no control yeah everything about this movie was fantastic even though it wasn't super great like i was just i can't believe how
Starting point is 00:37:47 it was good i can't i enjoy i it wasn't the best movie but i i was i thoroughly enjoyed it all the way through even though i had no idea what was going on damn and i could not believe it the entire time i was like i like and at the end like during the death game i was like i well we got to talk about can't i can't believe i am so incredibly into this like i can't like two hours later i was still just like like i hit pause and i was like oh 30 minutes left okay like i can't wait to see how this ends uh well so i want to so so we got to talk about the two games. We got to talk about Tokyo, the game, because it breaks into absolute chaos. Fans are jumping over the rails. They,
Starting point is 00:38:30 they, the players kill one of them. I'm pretty sure. Yeah. The fans, they like drag him down. Yeah. That was the amount of times people are like hitching on a bike and just
Starting point is 00:38:42 grab somebody and drag them. It's amazing. Amazing they killed they killed a fan and then the the moon pie the the execution where there's three japan guys and they hold them and they rip off the helmet and then the dude comes from behind and punches him in like the back of the neck, like the base of the neck. It's like where the neck attaches to the brain. It's like severed spinal cord. Yeah, they knew exactly where they were punching. And to set it up even more too, right? Like Moon Pie was taking dudes out on Tokyo because there were no rules.
Starting point is 00:39:20 And Moon Pie was the guy from Houston that took the penalties so that they could take out like, excuse me, they would take out like a motorcycle guy. Right. But he would do it by sniping him from above and doing an illegal kick with his skate to the face through the helmet. Like what a precision kick by Moon Pie to get a skate through the helmet to the face, just completely mangling the dude. And so Moon Pie is just Moon Pie, man. Moon Pie is just fucking dude stuff. through the helmet to the face just completely mangling the dude and so moon fucking name is moon pie man moon pie is just fucking dude stuff and no one is surprised by it did they ever say where he was what like city corporation he came from or is he just uh jarweed to believe he was a houstonian because that's not surprising either i met i lived there metal met a few moon pies in
Starting point is 00:40:03 my day no i was trying to figure that, I was trying to figure that out. I was trying to figure that out because they have the scene at the beginning or not the beginning, but kind of before the Tokyo game, they have the scene where they're like teaching people who are like, try it. They're like trying out new recruits. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:40:18 There were recruits for next season. I couldn't tell if it was like, um, replacements dude. Like people are dying. They got to have replacements. Yeah. But I couldn't tell if it was like um replacements dude like people are dying they gotta have replacements yeah but i couldn't i would imagine they they have some sort of like youth system set up right where you know just like soccer yeah yeah you got somebody on soccer especially with the people the amount of people dying you gotta have yeah absolutely they gotta
Starting point is 00:40:39 that's what i'm saying they gotta have like a backfill system yeah but i don't i don't know if it's like hyper local, like everybody on the Houston team is from Houston, or if it's kind of, you know, a free, if there's a free agent, I doubt there's a free agent system because that would be too individual. And I feel like you also might get a choice between like, you know, if you're committing a crime and it's like, Hey buddy, you got to. Oh, that for sure.
Starting point is 00:41:02 Like you just assaulted someone. Yeah. That's that's for sure yeah but so back to the tokyo game um they put moon pie in a coma um he's essentially a brain dead vegetable oh well because i didn't finish it he's like skating around taking dudes out and because tokyo is like fuck this dude he just wiped out like half of our team well no no no no no no this was this was a pre-planned mission even if moon pie was on his best behavior that that game they were gonna take they were gonna
Starting point is 00:41:30 fuck him out yeah yeah well because that was part of the game right there were no rules like you needed to like kill the best people from the other team and take them out and so there was yeah there was a hit plan and there was three guys in the sniper position and moon pie just looking for other fools to take out doesn't even see him come up on him and before that jonathan kind of gets an injury and is out on the side he's on the bench he had to sub out so he's on the bench getting taken care of real quick and then he sees this like out of his periphery he sees these three guys come run up on moon pie they take moon pie down to like the bottom and like right in front of him right in front of him pop his helmet and then like you said they take their glove they punch him right where
Starting point is 00:42:18 the the head connects to the brain and moon pie is instantly a vegetable right there on the spot. And Jonathan is just sitting there staring all like literally looking moon pie in the eye as he's incapacitated for the rest of his life. And it's a pretty rough to watch. It was, it was very intense. So then Jonathan gets pissed off. He essentially, he goes back and he skates, he finds the guy who did the punch,
Starting point is 00:42:44 the Japan player who did the punch, and basically does the same thing to him. I'm assuming killed him or turned him into a vegetable. Oh, 100% killed him. And that's when the – and then we have the whole fan thing where he hops over and he gets drugged. And then Blue, one of our bikers, catches on fire. Yeah, his bike blows up and Blue catches blows up and he's just on fire rolling around
Starting point is 00:43:07 court oh that was that was crazy too and then i had another question so right after this after the game they end up winning they beat tokyo yeah yeah um because jonathan just plays on another level right it gets it gets it was it two one again i think it was two one yeah two one on the game um but but so this movie was so good people have been sleeping on this movie i'm like i'm all in the more we talk about it the more in i am after the game i have to get it on dvd or buy it on amazon okay i got digital credits on Amazon I'm gonna fucking use them on Rollerball so after the game after the Tokyo game he Jonathan goes to the hospital in Japan
Starting point is 00:43:50 to see Moon Pie who is a vegetable and the Japan doctor is trying his hardest to just be able to pull the plug he's like oh hello good friend great game my question is why is why
Starting point is 00:44:06 is why does jonathan need is jonathan moon pie's legal guardian is this why does he have to sign off on this like well because they said why wouldn't i had no no friends no family i feel like the corporation just kill him just fucking why do you need jonathan's signature moon pie must have like put in a will or something that like required that would i would they allow that in this in this dystopian future for you to have like a uh a next of kin kind of will scenario where they're allowed to to decide well brandon i think that if these writers in 1975 would have asked us for feedback on their script we would have definitely provided this exact scenario um and i think that's what i think that's what we're i think we're more so staring down the barrel of some sloppy writing than like you know so to to piggyback off that
Starting point is 00:44:58 i got a fun fact for you since you mentioned the writing so So this movie came out in 1975. So the screenplay is based on a short story from Esquire magazine in 1973. It's the same guy that wrote the short story then wrote the screenplay. But it started as a short story in an esquire magazine no way yeah that's amazing yeah crazy um it's a great it's a great i mean it's in and that makes sense but there's some like weird holes and like they took some weird liberties in certain places that they didn't need to like they needed to grab that person it explains it explains why there's like such a lack of information about the corporation because in
Starting point is 00:45:50 a short story you can get away with that you can you know yeah there's not there you're not writing long enough to for people to start being like okay what the fuck is going on yeah like what's the deal with this corporation i have the same questions as jonathan like like i agree why are they making these weird decisions it doesn't make any sense it's not is it helping them is rollerball helping have we figured that out like i think i think so okay like but because like i mean every nobody's fans in the stands were fighting all the time did you notice that like they were always like shoving and pushing unless there was like only their fans doing the tokyo i think that's the goal right i think the goal is you divide the nations you distract people and divide that way they fight each other at the
Starting point is 00:46:40 rollerball competitions instead of starting like a revolution you know you turn the poor can you say that one more time a little bit louder for the people in the back Brandon you turn the poor you turn the poor people against the even more poor people and then that way they're too busy fighting each other that's what they're doing here oh once
Starting point is 00:46:59 again can you say it louder for the fucking people in the back that think that any politician like anyone both sides both sides, both sides, like anyone's like, hey, this fucking politician guy seems like a real class act that has my back. Like, you're wrong. You're wrong. Just wait, though. Just wait three years and I'm running. Same.
Starting point is 00:47:22 You know what? And you know what? You get my party. I could run right now. Yeah know what I'm calling my party? I could run now. And I'm going to. It's called the sanity party. It's for people who just want sanity back in the world.
Starting point is 00:47:35 That's too on the nose. You gotta be clever than that. Okay, so what should we say instead of the sanity party? Because I feel like you have to be How about the moon pie party? Sweet sanity party. Because I feel like you have to be that. How about the moon pie party? Sweet dreams party. We're going to shoot for the stars
Starting point is 00:47:52 and land on the moon. Exactly. And then you just got to do Harry Caray impersonations all the time. My impersonation of Will Ferrell doing a Harry Caray impersonation which is actually what it is because like those are
Starting point is 00:48:08 that DVD I think one of my buddies had it like the best of Will Ferrell DVD where they had the Harry Caray one with what's the guy from Jurassic Park what's his name with the glasses that was really cool Jeff Goldblum and Jeff Goldblum was interviewing Harry Caray
Starting point is 00:48:24 what if the moon was made of barbec barbecue sparingly would you eat it i would and i published it i was a tall cool bud why so not to so not to cut cut you off uh your your hair i was looking i was looking back at my notes and we skipped over one of the most insane scenes in the movie. Where it's – so they have – I think it's before Tokyo, right? Where they do the party. Everybody at the party for his – the video package of the announcement. And the rich people who are tripping balls are just shooting you with the weird laser gun and the whole time i kept waiting for one of the people to shoot someone else that's what i was like
Starting point is 00:49:12 because they almost did so at the party so so we established daphne is one of the girls that's cycling in and out she's pissed but she leaves or not daphne um i'm sorry the first lady is not daphne i'm mixing up the names second lady's daphne the first lady is mackie mackie's the first the brunette she's the one who's very upset and leaves daphne's the second one the blonde that shows up that's like not like that's like real overtly trying to be like you need to fucking retire she's a plant for sure. So Mackie, but he runs into Mackie at the party. Mackie's she's been cycled to another person, another assignment.
Starting point is 00:49:52 Mackie's at the party and she's got that like crazy look in her eye. And then for the scene where they're all tripping balls and they're all outside with a fucking laser gun. I thought she was going to murder everyone. She gets gets it she's she's shooting like four trees um yeah i thought she was gonna turn around because she had those crazy eyes going i thought she was gonna turn around and be like i was just waiting for it and waiting for a completely charred carcass to be presented that scene was fucking insane though that was that was intense too it was weird it kept cutting back from that to where Mr. Bartholomew and
Starting point is 00:50:30 Jonathan are having a intense conversation and they're like screaming at each other you gotta quit I'll never quit you took my wife you stole my fucking wife and gave her to someone else dude when they started shooting trees i was like what the fuck is going on and what was the point
Starting point is 00:50:55 of that like tripping balls and there was the two it was one of the dudes that had that they're gonna take out evans so it has to be john yeah had to have been jonathan evans that they were talking about right oh you would think but they never they all they only say e the rest of the movie i don't know why they would like it was such a weird i know they just it was that's the only logical explanation but that that's what i i was like it's either gotta be him or like one of the corporate dudes or something is going on i don't know but it i just kind of breezed over it a little bit after like we kind of started moving into more of the plans like all right whatever i'm just yeah but so that happens the way the tokyo game then moon pie that whole thing and
Starting point is 00:51:43 then we moved to this is when he goes to geneva to talk to the fucking computer that's no help and the insane librarian who's just the librarian has the loosest lips he's telling fucking jonathan anything he knows um and then he starts fucking freaking out and kicking the computer when i won't give him an answer yeah because the computer's like no no yeah and i said well the line where they lost a whole century that was ridiculous and and and and like his the whole premise of jonathan's question of like why do they make the decisions they make you're asking a computer why people make decisions that's a very poorly phrased and worded question like you had all this time and that's your fucking question like damn it jonathan no wonder like like i don't
Starting point is 00:52:34 know why the corporations are so scared of this guy other than the fact that he can't lose at rollerball for being so scared of the dude they let him walk up to the library why is he talking to the computer why would you even let him talk to the computer it doesn't make i i started checking out a little bit i think i made myself a frozen pizza during this part and i burnt it too it was not a good you gotta dude i forget in colorado you know you really gotta be mindful of your oven and your baking time sometimes that should sneak up on you the altitude man it messes with it you gotta you gotta yeah yeah exactly you know like in savannah you had to cook it just a little bit more if you wanted an extra crispy but uh so after that after the computer thing he comes back home and guess he guess he's fucking
Starting point is 00:53:27 home dude new lady or it wasn't it wasn't the new lady it was the old lady the og right was this his wife yeah his wife shows up yeah yeah shows up at his ranch yeah and he gets to and he gets to bang her too which i thought was nice for him like she's just like yeah all right cool let's do this i was hoping they would show it though i was hoping for some some titties or something you know but it just cuts to just cuts to them cuddling unbelievable but uh but yeah she throws she throws him a pity fuck and then she starts uh it's like so like i just banged you are you gonna get over me and fucking retire starts laying into this shit and that's what he you know that's when he realizes he's like god man i'm on i'm on my own here bro yeah you're just a plant yes and then what's he
Starting point is 00:54:18 say at the very end the very end of the conversation he goes uh it was like uh she was she said something she was like he's like i don't know what you what you expected or what you wanted from me or what you know what you what we thought was going to happen and he was like he said something like i just i just thought you'd be on my side or something like that like real real fucking sad i almost cried it's a god damn god damn uh women can't trust. Can't trust him in 1975. Can't trust him in futuristic 2018. And he sure as heck can't trust him now. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:54:53 I mean, why would you? Why would you? Why would you ever? Well, yeah. So that goes poorly. And now he's real fucking pissed yeah and then we go so we go to the new york game championship game this is when everybody starts chanting jonathan's dead jonathan's dead one one thing that i should we should mention and one of the previews that keeps like playing in the background on the imdb
Starting point is 00:55:25 on my side screen is um they in the not too distant future they replace wars with rollerball that's part of the preview so like that yeah that's nice that they can you know they don't murder each other organically with guns anymore they or now only strictly murder each other with a set of loose rules yes and based on that phrasing because again they don't fucking explain anything yeah but i'm assuming any type of power dispute between corporations you settle it on the roller ball whoever wins the rollerball game wins the war technically that's what i'm assuming they don't do a very good job of explaining but yeah but uh so another thing i want to point out is so they have the scoreboard set up and they have like lights for uh like little like there's like three or four
Starting point is 00:56:24 lights for all the people and then when somebody dies or gets carted off the lights go out red but what a great what a great fucking because like i was curious because like they didn't need the four lights like i like did the lights go down as they got like injured because like they were always full it was always full and then they always went all the way down like was it was that maybe just for visual effect because like they really didn't need four lines to do that they were alive they just yeah one i think i think that i think it was um just for visual yeah i think it was visual because i think i if if i had to now this is again this is me guessing because they don't explain anything i would imagine if you are injured that's when it goes
Starting point is 00:57:10 off into red i would imagine if you're on the the court or the the rink i forget what they call it if you're on if you're in the game playing you got all the lights if you're on the bench like waiting to be subbed in you have no lights and then if you're injured you get the red light yeah that's how i would do it well either way it was it was still awesome and the the classical music we didn't say this during the intro but the the music was actually a great score. That's fantastic. They used a ton of old classical music.
Starting point is 00:57:53 I was reading somewhere that that was a huge thing at the time when it came out that they got huge props for was how good the soundtrack was. Yeah. All of the music, each time it played, it was a really fantastic score. Yeah, it's fantastic. Amazing. time it played it was a really fantastic score oh yeah it's fantastic amazing um i loved how i love because it's very very stereo stereotypical of like when the 1970s imagined how the future would look they just made everything shiny yeah like wallpaper no shiny plastic walls yeah yeah or when he walks in the first time to meet with uh bartholomew and it's just like the the crystal like uh what do you call it like it's like crystal like um like hanging from the ceiling like crystal like little like net thing you know like walk through the crystals oh yeah what did you think about the uh like the tv producer interaction dirt for his retirement
Starting point is 00:58:52 videotaping oh that was that was crazy that was the weird and like and then he like he hits that weird sound i'm a stat freak yeah well then there's this there's that weird thing where he hits like a weird sound button and it makes like a like a like a computer noise and the dude freaks out he's like don't ever don't ever touch that again what the fuck was that about and and then he talks to him about like all of his stats and the people that died and then he drugs the girl and then he just walks out without giving his retirement speech oh that was really good too all leading up for the no time limit final excuse me final game of rollerball to the death amazing to the death last man standing all because jonathan won't fucking retire i know because he thinks he's
Starting point is 00:59:41 protecting his team yeah he keeps giving that excuse. He's like, I'm not leaving these boys. I'm not leaving these guys out there. I'm not leaving them out there to fight on their own. You're leading them into their death. Their certain death is what you're doing. They might change the rules back to not everyone has to die and have a time limit if you would just fucking retire.
Starting point is 01:00:05 I don't know. And then, so it's a battle to the death. It's very brutal. Everybody's dying. It comes down to Jonathan and then two people on the New York team. One guy on a bike and one skater. The skater, like, comes at him. And Jonathan just, like, real quick chokes him to death.
Starting point is 01:00:22 Just boom, boom. Yeah. He, like, breaks his neck, chokes him to death just boom boom yeah he like breaks his neck slash chokes him to death right in front of the bartholomew guy yeah right in front of his box yeah and then the bike and the star wars dude yeah his lackey star and then the bike guy comes at him and they're tussling and jonathan's about to kill him like he's got the ball he's gonna slam it right in his face and then he decides. He decides not to. Like you mentioned, it's like the Hunger Games.
Starting point is 01:00:47 He's like, you know what? We can both live. We can both live, buddy. You can be gently maimed and I will be. You can be my PETA. I'll be Katniss. You be my PETA. Do you think that's what happened afterwards?
Starting point is 01:01:03 Oh, yeah. They became best buds for sure that's the that's the new that's his new moon pie that's his new moon pie okay but then he then he does the weird fucking victory lap where he's just skating around um and yeah like i like we talked about uh what what happened what happens after this i would love to know what happens after this does he does he do all this and then like in one rollerball like what does that mean for rollerball like is there does he do does he retire after this yeah like because they have to just like that would be amazing out of the public eye and just have them never hear from him and then they like bring out his like reanimated
Starting point is 01:01:46 corpse and like you know like to welcome to the second anniversary of Rollerball I'm Jonathan that would be fucking amazing though if after all of this after all these games after after he he essentially kills all these people the next day he's like okay
Starting point is 01:02:01 I'm retiring I'm done that's it I'm i'm out of here it's been a good run it's that or like if he keeps playing they're just gonna they're actually keep trying to kill him every game like this is just it's never gonna end jonathan it's never gonna end then they have to change it from rollerball to death ball because it's it's no longer a game it's literally just murder. Yeah. All that for his crazy ex-wife that didn't even want him. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:02:33 All of this is still fantastic. Do you have any more fun facts for us, Brandon? So I have, based on a short story like I mentioned, takes place in 2018. I think I mentioned that. Five years ago. Very close. We're five years post-rollerball. Imagine a world, man.
Starting point is 01:02:56 Imagine a world. We're running up on it. They said 2018. They probably should have given it a 2045. 2040 um 2030 for all the conspiracy theorists out there right that's the agenda but um the estimated budget for the movie was six million dollars and then it worldwide box office estimated um 30 plus million so made a shit ton of money yeah um and then i got i got i got a couple critic scores and i got some rotten tomatoes facts here oh love that it's 6.6 out of 10 on imdb 6.6 that makes sense because critics the rotten tomatoes critic score is 67%, so 6.7, and then audience is 61, so
Starting point is 01:03:45 solid. Yeah, it's a solid, what's that, it's a C, D? That would be a D. That would be a D, wow. 67, 66 would be like a D+, 61 would just be a D. Yeah,
Starting point is 01:04:02 like I said, I was thoroughly and completely confused throughout the whole thing but incredibly entertained yeah i at first i was just like oh boy what are we getting ourselves into but within 10 seconds of that rollerball game i was all the way bought in trying to figure out what was happening trying to figure out the in trying to figure out what was happening, trying to figure out the rules, trying to figure out who was what, trying to figure out, okay, like, and then I was trying to figure out which position I would have wanted to play if I were in rollerball. Like that's, that was like the other piece that I thought a lot about, especially after the game, I was like, man, you know, and I think I would have wanted to be a glove guy, you know, like, yeah, I think I would have wanted to be one of the glove guys. I think I would have, you be a glove guy you know like yeah i think i would have wanted to be
Starting point is 01:04:46 one of the glove guys i think i would have you know wanted to hand it off with jonathan and then like you know go on the attack or defense you know i i imagine you get to well maybe not the first game but the the following two games you're gonna use that glove as a weapon you know absolutely well and like it has like it's it had like a connector too in their arm and it looked like a steel club so you can just club fools with that i wonder if that would have been retrieving a penalty yeah because during the first game before they you know get rid of all the rules there were penalties there were three three minute penalties very similar to hockey where you skate off yeah um usually with the motorcycles penalties usually are on the well
Starting point is 01:05:26 they hit the motorcycles the what they called two penalties in the first game that i remember one was a biking infraction on uh madrid um so the the biker guy had to pull off but then the second one was uh was on moon pie when he kicked the dude in the face. Yeah, that was amazing. But yeah, that's all the fun facts I got. Do you got anything, Heath? Well, I do have how our listeners can watch it and I'm just going to throw this out there. You should sponsor us because we're fantastic. But Tubi TV is where you can watch this amazing movie if you if yeah if you haven't watched rollerball yet
Starting point is 01:06:12 it's worth it and you somehow got through all of this without having watched it or before having watched it go watch it it's go watch it right now ridiculous yeah it's it's but it's worth it and if you're like me i like where I was like, damn, I wish Big Mike was here. Next time you go home to visit the parents and you're in the basement with your dad. Prime dad bonding movie right here. Oh, one million percent. Like, throw this on. It's just you and your dad.
Starting point is 01:06:37 And you can start, you know, your chit-chat and figuring out the rules together. Figuring out the plot line together. Like, oh, man, did you see that? Oh, which position would you play I feel like Big Mike would want to be like a motorcycle driver you know yeah I could see that right like you know
Starting point is 01:06:54 Big Mike I feel like he'd be a motorcycle driver yeah alright we gotta do our we gotta do our cakey ratings I suppose we can cakey ratings I was unexpected I wasn't expecting you to like this movie as much as I did you liked it just as much
Starting point is 01:07:12 as fantastic and like I said Kelly was mortified when she came down and it was she came down in like right in the middle like toward like towards the end of the death game so there's just dead bodies all over the place. And they're doing like crazy close-ups on their face.
Starting point is 01:07:27 Yeah, yeah. And I think that it was when she came down right when the paramedics went out to go get the dead body. And nobody stopped. Nobody fucking stopped. They shot the game controller, shot the ball out,
Starting point is 01:07:42 and then everyone took out one of those guys. What's your cakey rating? You can go first or do you want me to go first? You go first. I surprisingly liked this movie a lot. I'm not going to go as nice as I go with some of the insane movies that I love, but I say it's
Starting point is 01:08:00 a solid 3.15. 3.15? Oh, okay. I would have thought it'd be higher than that. It was, I was close, but I needed to do some realism in this and the fact that like part of the fun of it being like trying to figure out what's happening
Starting point is 01:08:20 also should go against it. That should not have been part of the viewing experience is trying to figure out what the what is actually happening around me yeah like i've said many times before i had no idea what's going on but i loved every second of it my i'm gonna i'm gonna give it a three four three point four kiki oh wow we're pretty close on this one that's surprising usually i go way over and you go way under i was thoroughly entertained from the jump the first 15 minutes when there's when it's just a rollerball game and there's zero explanation zero plot zero exposition it's just you and rd bob miller enjoying a nice game of rollerball man yeah and i loved it you you had texted me before i
Starting point is 01:09:06 watched it so i kind of knew where it's like hey it's just a game of rollerball before and like i you know you didn't give anything other than that which i appreciate so because like i walked in i was like all right so it's gonna be a game of rollerball and so when it started introducing i was like well i didn't quite expect it to be that they show the prep for the game. Oh, yeah. It was like it's like Rookie of the Year when they're showing the grounds crew out there. Yeah, exactly. And it made you kind of give the because I mean, you know me, I'm I'm a early bird gets the worm.
Starting point is 01:09:39 And so like when Kelly and I went to Ghost Pirates games, we were always there early for the warmups and stuff. It was part of the experience. Hit up the merch store, buy a whole bunch of shit that you don't need. I have so much Ghost Pirates gear that what am I going to do with my Ghost Pirates jersey? But I wore it for 20-some straight games in the fall last year, and for listening, everyone.
Starting point is 01:10:29 Please remember to follow and like us on Instagram at TheCakeEatersPod, on Twitter at TheCakeEaters. Also reach out to us via email, TheCakeEatersPod at gmail.com or visit our website, thecakeeaterspod.com.

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