The Cake Eaters - 74. Good Burger 2

Episode Date: January 2, 2024

On today's episode, the boys tackle Hollywood's latest nostalgia money grab Good Burger 2. Heath and Brandon discuss Arby's and product placement, the great heels of WWE, letting people live too long, roller rink DJs, dead mom jokes, Brandon's proposal to end nepotism, and we get yet another edition of Heath's Ska Corner. Follow us at www.thecakeaterspod.com and on Twitter (@thecakeeaters) and Instagram (@thecakeeaterspod) Email us at [e-mail]

It's not worth winning if you can't win! Welcome to Good Burger, home of the Good Burger. Can I take your order? Meat, moot, more. Robot boys. Nailed it, Heath. Robot Heath and Brandon, the cake eaters, coming at you. Oh, dude. Imagine how much better this podcast would be if we had Robot Heath instead of regular Heath.

I don't know if he'd have as much personality, Brandon. But imagine the free time you'd have, though. Oh, it'd be fantastic. I don't know what all these celebrities are worried about. You just record yourself once, and then you never have to read an ad again you just get paid the same well the problem is they wouldn't get paid that's what they're trying to that's what they're trying to fight for is they're trying to be able to get paid for it well you know that's that's their fault for putting their voice in a recording yeah you put you put it out on the internet that's

your fault you know she never goes away anyways all right brandon what are what are we discussing here today other than disappointment we are discussing the the anti future message the anti-ai the anti-computer workforce message that has been honestly permeated throughout both installments of this franchise we're talking about good burger too yep does it was it was it just good burger too or did it have a stupid stupid tagline too no no no it's just good burger too it's that the way you sounded is it like said it though it sounded like should have been good burger too back in the bun oh that would have been that would have been good back in the bun you're

welcome god but anyways hey back in the bun bun do you think like his like his little kid oh yeah baby bun bun my god that that i did get a little chuckle out of that that he made all of his kids burger ingredients i legitimately laughed at no mayo that got a laugh and then but then they followed it up with and then he got stuck struck by electricity and glows in the dark like god damn it you know that was that was almost funny just one step too far this one's up too far but do you think do you think that like mcdonald's burger king chick-fil-a all these restaurants right do you think that they received the message that good burger 2 sent to them you know you must pay your fast food employees 25 an hour and you may not replace them with robots

because we as the people need people to service our food although dude those ai dogs dude do not normalize those things those things freak me out like i'm gonna baseball bat one of those motherfuckers if they're patrolling my neighborhood fuck those dudes like the are you like the delivery ones they're like yeah did you see the robot dog in the movie fuck that i hated that thing i was like do not make that a thing where those goddamn things are walking around. Fuck that. Yeah. Well, they already have.

There's some college towns I know that I've seen it on online where they have like robot delivery, like food, like food delivery things. The self-driving car traffic jam in San Francisco is one of my favorite pictures. That was amazing. Like that was just, that was beautiful, beautiful. You know,

you know who did, you know, who fully gets the message of this movie is, is Arby's. Did you see, they have, they did a, they did a legit,

you can go to Arby's. Well, I don't know. By the time this episode comes out, I don't know if it'll still be there, but they did a good, like a good burger. You could go to Arby's and order a good burger and they'd make it with uh with ed sauce and everything

what i didn't know that man i missed that i never went and got it um i don't know how good it is but arby's gets a bad like everyone rips on arby's do i remember when arby's like first came out and those commercials my sister and i we would get when they built it in norfolk arby's Arby's like first came out and those commercials, my sister and I, we would get when they built it in Norfolk. Arby's first came out. Maybe Arby's has been around since like the forties. Well, when we first, like it's first started getting advertised in my little tiny towns and we were aware that there was an Arby's in Norfolk.

When your town first got electricity in 1994. Is that what you're talking about? 1994. You're the worst yep and then we we rode our horse and boogie on the way into school but no dude we would literally um like be in the car and be like the same the same the same the same rbs is different remember those commercials remember when they remember when they had the shitty burgers the same the same the same the same arby's is different they've always been um been pretty good with the commercials they had that then they had that the talking oven mint for a while oh yeah that was a good one well i mean they kind of stole the talking oven mitt from the four finger

hamburger helper guy well kind of but it was well he was he an oven mitt or because he was it was made to look like their logo which i think is a is that a cowboy hat yeah yeah i think it's a hat but i think the i think it was like an oven mitt that they had talking but it just like was made to look like the logo i don't know i don't know it was a while ago i don't remember dude i'll fuck around with some with a beef and cheddar though it's pretty good a little beef and cheddar with some arby's sauce come on there's a little beef and cheddar with some arby's sauce that'll get you right some curly fries i say where arby's kills it is the sides the curly fries they have like the best best jalapeno poppers I've ever had at a fast food restaurant. Oh, yeah.

I'm glad you're on the same page as me, Brandon. Listen, am I going to go seek it out? No. But if I'm hungry, there's one there. We probably should have tried the Good Burger before this. That was a planning mistake on our part.

Yeah, that was a wildly missed opportunity. You know, their french dip too we can end it on that like i'm i'm i i never get mad at their french tip although now they're starting to skimp on the roast beef so that's where that's where they're starting to go wrong like they used to pile that on you know you get a big old dynamics man oh dude by dynamics that mother that crusty old son of a dude dude go go collect death somewhere where you're gonna do less damage you sick son of a bitch do less damage i don't think i don't think he's done any damage i don't think he's done any anything that's a problem i'm not necessarily he's just half dead no no no damage is better than critical damage he's

what about damage control so that was a wrestling joke that looks like they're starting to box bailey out of the group though and you know they're in trouble i love bailey i love her too but she fucking like i can't take her seriously at all because her like her like facial expressions and then the god bless her the pants that she wears are so non-flattering oh my god i don't like those big ponchy pants with the straps dude i will never be able to see her as a bad guy i will only see thank god flailing inflatable tube man bailey dude that was legit remember um was it i do like her as a bad guy though because she's just a war remember back in i think it was during covet and a little after right before she like got hurt for that extended period of time and she had that like uh like soccer mom haircut that was the fucking worst yes dude that's why i love bailey she still rocked it though she

rocked yeah like i don't know what she's thinking half the time but god bless her dude and she's really good at making her people hate her right now yeah she's a great heel uh dude i loved that i as a kiddo you know i was all in on the, but as an adult, now that Kelly tells me I'm a Slytherin, I love a good heel. Yeah, you can't beat it. The best was Rick Rude. Rick Rude would drop the robe, and he would have the person's wife's face on the crotch of his pants, and he would start doing his little thing. My God. Genius.

I got my Mr mr perfect shirt on oh nice nice i'm a sucker for uh the i like the ms when he goes when he goes like full hill and starts just like screaming at the top of his lungs i'm a sucker for that yeah the the fact that the ms was a real world you know contestant and then won that that uh wrestling contest show oh my god oh i've always i've loved him ever since it was fantastic yeah yeah i never cheered for him but like i've always been uh you know yeah glad he's around yeah he's he's a perfect like um like mid-card mid-card just troublemaker you know just stirring you you gotta have the

whatever you need right yeah like yeah he's like a million dollar man yeah whatever you need some cheap heat just have him go out there and tell everybody they're gross and ugly you know yeah exactly like you i am so much better than all you yeah it's just anyways there's you gotta have guys like that that can hold down the mid card and like so that when you get your like oh should we push this guy's the main event talent and then anyways all right should we talk about good burger yeah yeah well we'll talk about it yeah we'll save uh we're probably gonna get a lot of side tangents here in this episode because um i i think i texted you heath i have like four notes because this movie was not this movie spoiler alert, this movie, not good.

If you are a millennial who enjoyed your childhood, cancel your Paramount Plus subscription right now. That's what I'm doing. I bought the yearly subscription. I canceled it this morning after I watched this movie. It's not worth it. That's just a waste of money.

They don't give you a refund, do they? You keep your subscription through the end of the year oh okay i just turned off that fucking auto renewal because i would have auto renewed like i am i am these people's prime customer brandon i will auto renew i will fill out their surveys i love a good survey i do all that shit but that's all good all the way i must i love a good especially for these subscript all this fucking subscription stuff i love a good year-long plan with the auto renew i i've been trying to disney won't fucking let me do it i've been trying to get on a yearly plan with them but they don't do it because then they wouldn't be able to raise prices as much as they fucking do. Yeah.

HBO Max has a nice yearly rate. I can't remember if I did that or not, but whatever. I skim my HBO Max off of one of my boys. Oh, nice. Okay. Well, there you go. All right. Well, Brandon, I took pretty good notes for this movie,

and listeners, I'll forewarn you, too. I am fresh off of COVID. So if I sound like dog shit tough, just deal with it. I sound a lot better than I used to. I'm also in a terrible mood because this movie pissed me off. It's like you keep ruining shit from our childhood. No one is asking for this. How do Hollywood studios not understand the reason that we're nostalgic for all of the old stuff that we used to watch is because it was good yeah this is this is the

most blatant like just nostalgic cash grab i've seen in a long time because they legitimately didn't try yeah they just they they did the absolute bare minimum. Even – like I love Kenan, and Kenan's a fantastic actor, and I love him on SNL. And as Russ Tyler, amazing. You can tell he is putting zero effort into this. His heart is not in this movie at all. He is here for a paycheck, and he's going to – and he did a cool thing where he pulled in all his SNL buddies for cameos to get them a little paycheck. There's so many goddamn cameos in this movie. It's insane.

I mean, we started off with Pete Davidson. That's one of the notes I wrote is, you know you're in for a great movie when Pete Davidson is the first face you see. Yeah. And it starts off with Ed curled up like a cat on the counter sleeping did it did the this movie caught me off guard because i hit play and there were zero there was like half of an opening credit like a little title sequence and then it went right into the movie it started so quick it threw me off i was like wait is this wait we're already going yeah yeah it just like didn't even right into the end it didn't bother telling you what production company it was they were like we're not good we're not putting

our name on this yeah we know it was it was nickelodeon and paramount plus well yeah but usually there's like you know usually there's like i know it's like executive they're like executive producer go fuck yourself everybody was like I'm not putting my name producer I fucking suck everybody was like this is garbage put my name at the very end director I'm a loser

don't even list me on IMDB I don't want to be a part of this my god who is that written by oh dude you know what sucks the guy who wrote it guess what his name is what Heath his name is what heath his name is heath seifert seifert oh co-writer yep kevin coplo and heath seifert and phil trail is the director all of them should talk about a talk about a rough uh oh a rough what they had to do based on

characters by dan snyder in the writing credits well yeah because it's based on the the all that scale you know it's like legally they got to do that legally they got to do it but you just you can take the dan snyder out of the nickelodeon but you can't take the nickelodeon but talk about it talk about a rough combo first name, Heath and Kevin. That's two of the worst first names ever. Oh, speaking of which. Why are you talking to me like that, Brandon? What the fuck is wrong with you?

So I told you offline that I went to the Colorado Eagles minor league hockey game last night. Fly Eagles, baby. They got fucking killed, destroyed. But the highlight of night was they there's a player on their team he started he was the starting center i believe and his name was ivan ivan i mean that's awesome that's amazing that's that's worth it that's worth it i actually that's that's a that's a hockey player right there ivan ivan dude i actually my only friday purchase was a new packers jersey because they have a player named malik heath had to be done malik heath yeah malik heath and so i now have a heat that's a mouthful to say malik heath malik heath unique new york that's what it reminded me of

i was trying i was thinking to myself though um it's got to be i was thinking to myself i was like because you know how like there's a bunch of um athletes that go by like nicknames you know and so i was thinking maybe ivan ivan's not like his legal name but then i was thinking what what would i like what would ivan be like what would it be short for what would be nick for it's got to be his legal name right ivan ivan yeah do you think he's got to be russian too right oh no he's czech he's from the czech republic okay well you knew it was somewhere in that general vicinity in europe yeah the eastern eastern block although it's czech i don't know if czech uh is technically part of the eastern block i think they're right before it i don't know it's been a while since i my world war ii education my soviet

union all right brandon let me let me drive us through this movie real quick i'm gonna i'm gonna get us kick-started. We're going to try to rip through this. Shout-out to Ivan Ivan, though. Shout-out Colorado Eagles. Fly, Eagles, fly, baby. All right, so, like you said, the movie freaking comes in super hot.

We get Ed and all of the different foods doing the worst off-key musical ever and then your boy pete davidson is smacking the counter to freaking wake ed up hated all that um so you get a welcome to good burger home of the good burger can i take your order um i just i don't know they did a quick intro with it was like a remix of the we got to talk about this brandon they remixed the i'm a dude he's a dude song they they took less than jake out of it like what what happened what happened you gotta used to be a proper country brandon with music in our bones

that's a fucking tiktok cut right there for you man used to be proper country with scott in our bones i've been falling behind on the tiktoks i gotta get back i haven't posted in a while uh yeah dude you gotta you gotta we gotta do some like tiktok lives or some shit to get the one thing we need to do that i tried to get you to do and you never did was the fucking power line dance um that would, that would have crushed it on Tik TOK. All right. Well, I mean,

I can text Kelly right now and just be like, Hey, can you record me doing the power line dance? Okay. I mean, it's like eight months after we did a goofy movie, but it'll be fine. All right.

Done. But, um, they, they, they had to, they, they they update they were trying to update it for you know for the um for the younger audience you know less than jake not exactly the most popular with uh with gen z yeah i know i know like i said like i said we used to we used to appreciate the you know the horns yeah it's called it's called it's called art okay guys art it's you ever heard of a little group called the mighty mighty bostones go yourselves all right so uh and then oh my god and then this this introduction to keenan's character dexter i did you what like what were you let me let me say let me say what

it is before i get your thoughts okay so keenan is doing keenan business shit and he is getting this ready in the office and it's a no fire product right and he's anti anti i don't even know how you would say it but he calls it no fire right like i'm pretty sure he calls it no fire and it's you spray it on whatever and it will not start on fire but as he is like giving this lecture on a like a little patio on his house or a little stage in front of his home and he's like this this was the only good thing that happened he's like so we fast-tracked it and prototype three months later suck it scientists and that's when you knew exactly what was going to happen right so they spray the no fire on and his whole house starts on fire in front of mark cuban mark cuban yells at him that he owes him fucking money

and then um keenan basically is homeless speaking of mark cuban he just sold he sold the mass do you see that yeah i did see that i did i did see that yeah dude i hate that he's gonna do you think he's gonna run that's the that's the scuttlebutt is he's doing all this so he can run for prez oh nice i mean you know, you know, if, you know, I wish the Mavs wouldn't have traded for Kyrie. That's, that's my only thing. Like you have Luca Donchich and you put Kyrie Irving with him. What the fuck is wrong with you? It's the dumbest shit ever.

The guy's a lunatic. Yeah. And not good. And it used to be good. I'm a, I'm probably, I i'm i'm a full-blown kairi hater so yeah i know but anyways as dexter is outside the office brandon he sees the yo-yo the old yo-yo he he so yeah he burns down his house he's homeless he's homeless he's trying to figure out where he can go to stay and this is where we get like the weird little mention that he's got a sister now apparently so

he tries to call her she instant instant voicemail yeah um yeah yeah and then i do want to point out something blue buddy blue buddy blue buddy blue buddy i do want to point out something before we uh uh move on okay which is uh the girl who plays his uh assistant is uh sophia black uh delia she uh is a fantastic have you ever seen um a single drunk female no it's a show on i think it's on freeform um but you can watch it on hulu for sure okay um it's uh like a little sitcom it's hilarious um she plays a uh a girl who like just got out of um like rehab for alcoholism as in aa and she's trying to you know not be a piece of shit it's hilarious she's a great actress good show i feel like kelly might like that probably yeah all right i'll have to give it a shot i i was wondering like they featured her even though she was only in the show for like 10

seconds so i was wondering who she is she's also in um she was in um a show with brian cranston um where he played like a judge i never watched it but i know she was in that too she's in a bunch she's in a bunch of other stuff but is any of this stuff on apple tv i sometimes i order so much uber eats they give me a free month of apple tv i think no i was gonna say so the show she's on with brian cranson is called your honor that's on showtime that was on showtime and then uh single drunk females on Hulu. I don't think any of it's on Apple. But Single Drunk Female is a great show. It's a fun little sitcom just to throw on in the background. All right.

Nice. I love it. All right. So Dexter calls Kel and he's headed back to L.A. And he gets dropped off at the bus and your boy is driving in the most insane way possible. What's that? Did they say where he was at? No, I assumed it was not that far though but like you would still think

you'd be in like silicon valley or something right yeah maybe i don't know where does cuban usually hang out i don't know where where do billionaires hang out brandon you're asking the guy clearly clearly yeah yeah but anyways um i i also hated this scene though where ed is going to pick up to pick up keenan hits him with the burger car keenan does 10 flips and lands in the passenger seat i fucking hated all of it you know so we were we were talking about all of the the cameos in here right and um i off air with you i brought up one cameo that they completely missed the ball on and that was they didn't have sin bad back he he does the voice for something in this i saw that in the credits yeah they never show his face he's not he doesn't do a cameo in that and when they had the opportunity

when he backs into the car right hit and run yeah yeah just have have to have them turn around and sinbad just be in the other car like what are you guys doing yeah that would have been that's amazing it would have been like there was so and that's what like is annoying once again about like everything about modern cinema is that like it could have been funny there was there was there were opportunities for it to be funny but instead they just made it fucking suck. Yeah. There's, like we've said, like we said with all these, with the Ducks TV show and everything else,

just hire us, you know? Yes. Yeah. Like at least we're millennials, you know, that actually know what we want. We're not fucking morons trying to make some i don't know it doesn't matter it's just it was all dumb how old do you think the other heath is do you think he's a millennial i don't know no no born 1968 might as well be dead old

jesus christ what about this movie sex what about kevin let's see oh kevin's even older 1963. my gosh just no wonder there was no effort put into it they're basically dead we i know we need to start we need to stop keeping people alive for so fucking long we need to start shooting people into the ground oh my god i am 100 on that bandwagon and brandon you heard it here first do not fucking mix me with the elixir of health or whatever save it for like what would you want to stick around that long for my god if i end up hitting like 70 years old i'm gonna be fucking furious oh my god yeah could you imagine living to be a hundred oh dude just like that like that just think about the amount of taxes you will have paid living to a hundred think about that at the at the eagles

game last night they did uh one of the you know the they do like the trivia things with people in the stands one of them was um about clint eastwood's age dude's 93 years old what why are you still hanging around why is he still acting what more what more are you trying to do here Clint you've made you know countless billions of dollars you've you're famous you've been in tons of movies what more are you trying to do here I don't know you think he's a vampire no because he looks he looks every bit of 93 years old he's he's he is deteriorating like we're not supposed to live that long it's not that's that's that's why you know

I'm tapping out at most 70 if I made a 70 I'm gonna be furious I'm booking a skydiving trip and I'm not pulling the chute you know Brandon that's so fucked up I just damn it brandon okay anyway though so so yeah so kel's driving off brandon

jesus kel's uh kel's driving picks him up but we get back to the store because we go back to the store but while we're going back to the store and kel's driving he talks about the german dude that's on uh pitch perfect uh two and is in the new pitch perfect show i actually don't mind that guy he's kind of funny yeah he's flugelhorn well i think that that that's the his name in in uh and the that's his character's name, right? Flugelhorn? His real name is Flula Borg. Oh. Not Flugelhorn or whatever the fuck you're saying. But yeah, he's hilarious. I loved him in Pitch Perfect.

He was fantastic. Yeah, he was. Like him, every name that he gave Fat Amy in Pitch Perfect 2 was so good. You are a heated mess, a mess that is heated. That's really good stuff. So he was funny. I didn't get the whole, like, why Ed sauced him, though. That didn't.

He wanted sauce on the side and and kel was er ed uh was like well what what side do you want it on your left side of your right side and he i don't think he answered so he was like okay you're getting both bro anyways but i did think uh the whole twins freaking out Ed thing was really funny. That was good. When they bring in the boyfriend twins and then at the end with the triplets. That was a good bit. Yeah, it's just like that was funny, right?

That feels like something that an older adult that acted like that would do. Anyways, that was good. I hated the delivery driver being Ruth. I don't know. I didn't get it. You like Ruth? I didn't care much for Ruth. Hated his son.

I did like... Hated Ed Jr. There was a good line she had when they find out they're all getting fired. And Ed's like, who the hell is going to hire Ruth? She's basically dead. No offense. And she goes, it's okay. My heart's already stopped four times today.

I wish it would have stopped before the movie. That was a good one, though. Ed 2 was rough. And then all the little kids with the with the fucking burger names like i said i did like that i legitimately laughed at no mayo i thought that was hilarious i wait i did love the orange soda reference yeah that was a good one because i do i do i do that was good and carmen Electra coming back? That was Roxanne. Did you see the gnomes praying to the bird in the front yard?

That was, I liked that. Did you see, did you hear what Ed's wife's name is? Edie. Yeah, but it's spelled Eddie. I saw that. I thought that was good. I mean, Pickles has 10 toes. Mustard is allergic to hippos. No, he only has 10 toes. Yeah mean, pickles has 10 toes. Mustard is allergic to hippos.

No, he only has 10 toes. Yeah, he only has 10 toes. Mustard is allergic to hippos. Had him tested at birth. Ketchup is his third favorite. Yeah. Can't say that out loud. That one actually made me laugh, too.

Onion cries a lot. That was stupid as shit. No mayo. Fucking got electrocuted and glows in the dark i don't get it i didn't get it like no man it was funny but why should he just left it at the name with that yeah like no mayo we always leave him out boom that's that's much better than him being fucking anyways that's fine and then we get baby bun bun and it makes you think that carmen electra is his wife but ed is his wife and uh carmen electra is the the nanny because she's because she's

actually a nun is what she references yeah is that does she become a nun at the end of the first one or am i just remembering that i think so i don't know i just it's been long it's been a while since we watched it i forget yeah um that her his wife being a trapeze artist who paints picture of trapezes and then the dog's name attack and and don't brandon i almost turned the movie off i almost turned the fucking fucking movie off. That was the worst. That was the least funny thing I've ever seen in a movie. It was rough. It was rough.

You know who fucking stole the show from me, though, that I loved? It was Mr. Jensen. Yes. Mr. Jensen was the only good part and the fact that ed like would see him as a boss is also fantastic i gotta go call my mom and tell her that i made it here safe siri call mommy uh um and then keenan shares room with Ed Jr. and Ed Jr. sleeps in the bathtub full of water while Keenan

my phone just tried to call mommy jokes on my phone jokes on my phone though because my mom's dead that was a terrible time to put yourself on mute because now it's just awkward with me just sitting here in the silence of my own joke. Oh, my God. Because you made me cough.

Because I was like, he's not going to fucking say it. Of course he's going to fucking say it. Oh, my God. It's been a long time, though, since you've made a dead mom joke on the podcast. It was well overdue. Yeah, it was. Well, it's been a while since it's kind of come up, you know. You know, it's not like Rollerball had a lot of motherhood.

Yeah, exactly. You can't be throwing dead mom jokes around it's got to come up organically in context you know it's like what kind of sociopath is on this podcast just ripping dead mom jokes oh my god all right oh oh man all right hold on oh wait the and then ed bringing the pancakes into the bathroom and Oh, man. All right. Hold on. Oh, wait. And then Ed bringing the pancakes into the bathroom and Keenan washing his face with the maple syrup. Yeah, yeah. That was... Bathrooms are not meant for...

I don't even like... At games, having to take stuff... I will not order... Having to take a beer into the bathroom. I hate it we did uh it didn't look it didn't legitimately look like he put syrup on his face though which i mean commitment to the bit i would not have done that i mean i don't i just i i don't know it looked a little too slimy to be syrup though okay you know yeah now that you mentioned yeah

we did uh before we get too far away we did skip over a pretty uh a pretty sweet uh cameo who uh connie moldu laurie beth denberg with did we skip over her uh i mean i so like i said i didn't take great notes so my memory is a little hazy but in the credits which are listed in um in order of appearance she is ahead of pickles um so i'm assuming we we missed her her scene there oh yeah you're right we didn't um yeah it's it's when they go back and Kenan was talking to his niece and she's like,

I got a job because I had to help my mom out because you lost all her money, you dumb bitch. And then Lori Beth Denver. I couldn't tell. Yeah, Lori Beth Denver, she She revises the character that does does the crazy

order. Connie Muldoon. Her all that character. But yeah, she's great. I like that she stole a whole bunch of salt and pepper of all the things to grab. I thought it was sweet and low. I thought she grabbed sweet and low. It looked like salt and pepper to me.

Like the little white packets. That's probably what it was. I just assume all old ladies steal sweet and low, so that's just where my mind went. Cotton candy sweet and low, let me do the Tootsie Roll. Is it Do the Tootsie Roll? I thought it was Let Me See

That Tootsie Roll. I like to do the Tootsie Roll. I think she's supposed to do the Tootsie Roll. I think she's supposed to do the Tootsie Roll, though. But she's probably not as good as me. I'm probably better at Tootsie the Rolling. That's the problem. Tootsie the Rolling.

Anyway, I couldn't tell if... Did Mia's mom lose the money on the fire thing? No, I think. Or it was another thing he fucked her over on. Yeah, it was, he took advantage of his family before he took advantage of strangers. He's just a hustler, remember? Like that's, because the lawyer dude is like, you just got hustled by a real hustler player.

Yeah. That guy was good. That guy's great too. I'm trying to remember, what's his... I don't remember his name, but I love that Ron Funchess was the security guard. I love Ron, dude. Ron's the fucking best. Lil Rel.

That's his actual name. The actor's name, Lil Rel. He's great. He played the friend in Get Out. Did you ever watch the show on NBC? It was only on for one season. It had Ron Funches and Chris D'Elia on it. Oh, I know what you're talking about. Yeah, it was like, what was it called?

I know exactly what you're talking about, though. I loved that show. I think I bought it on YouTube. Yeah, that would make sense. It was during that time when you had to buy shit. I don't know. Chris DeLito weirds me out. I don't like him. I never got his comedy.

But I weirdly love that show. Heather Baby Bird. I'm trying to think. What was it? Ron Funches. Good stuff. Another cameo that we got was Fizz Brandon. I kind of referenced it earlier i hated that whole scene where is it undateable that's what it was called undateable there you go yeah

i kind of like that show i watched a couple episodes but like i said as christy christy is not my thing i mean it was not for a lot of people because it didn't last very long I do love I do fucking love Ron though Ron's the fucking best oh Bridget is that streaming on anything let's see here who was on it Bridget Medler

she was a she's a Disney Disney girl do you ever watch good luck Charlie she was the main girl on that was a uh she's a disney disney girl do you ever watch good luck charlie she was the main girl on that it was a great great show that was a great modern well i say modern it was like the it's like 2010 it was a great modern disney show looks like you can only buy it on youtube i gotta i gotta track down my youtube login What do you think that is? My God, I don't even know what email I used. I remember I bought it in Seattle.

I was like, oh, this show. I love this show. And I made Kelly watch it. And she's like, the show is really bad. It wasn't good. No, not popular. But man, I sure liked it. I liked it, I think, because that dude would always sing, too.

It was always funny. He ended up... The guy that's his co-star person was also in that Netflix holiday TV show with Dennis Quaid and Ashley Tisdale.

You know who else was in that? It was Bridget Midler. Oh, really? Is that the person? That's the good luck Charlie person? Yeah. Did you already forget the conversation we had two seconds ago? This is going to be awesome. We've talked about good burger too so much oh my god um all right so where were we at in the movie oh we

when fizz fizz we get fizz back that's right that's right because we get keenan is trying to hustle ed already five seconds in and he's already being the fucking worst. Did not learn his lesson after the first movie which I hate to see. It would be one thing if he was coming up with interesting ideas

and then failing. The anti-fire and then his permanent ice idea. The fact that Ed Jr. invents it's the permanent ice idea and the fact that Ed Jr. invents it at the end is so fucking dumb

they have permanent ice I mean it's not actual ice but it's already a thing where you can get those fucking I guess it's not totally permanent so never mind but they last fucking forever you know those little those cubes that you freeze and then they stay frozen i used to have nebraska ones yeah

yeah let's put them in your cocktail while you're getting drunk because the game sucks not technically permanent but i mean why would you need it to last more than you know fucking six days wow brandon you know what thanks for bringing up you know permanent ice and the fact that i used to own nebraska you know plastic ice cubes that i would use it just remind me of what a no win november train wreck it was god i was already in a bad enough mood and then you do this no brandon oh anyways so they're in the fucking freezer and Ed's like, oh, the handle's been broken off for 20 years.

Then they put it back on and Fizz is in there and they, in Cino Manum, he would have suffocated. Like, this would have suffocated and been dead. How did they bring him back to life? I don't think he would have suffocated. It's not airtight.

People die in freezers all the time brandon there's can't be that much oxygen they they die from from the cold because those freezers are not cold enough to freeze your body you wouldn't be you know they die from the cold they don't die from suffocation i don't think they would die from suffocation it's not like an airtight thing you're still getting airflow i just don't understand why they put that in there well because you need fizz you gotta have fizz in there and and so someone around a writer's table, Brandon, was like, listen, got a fantastic idea. Honestly, I would rather have. We're going to have a secret freezer that Ed broke the handle off of 20 years ago.

That was the. And trapped that poor fucking kid in there in ice for 20 years. When you put it like that, it sounds terrible. But, you know. That's what happened! But the most egregious thing I had an issue with was that there was a freezer inside of a freezer. I've never seen that before.

Have you seen that before? No. It doesn't exist. This whole thing was just... You could introduce Fizz in any way. Have him come through the drive-thru. He used to work the drive-thru. You think, okay, yeah.

Fizz would obviously still be working there if, you know. Fizz, I love Fizz. He's not the brightest tool in the shed here, though, you know. He could have, Fizz could have gone on to be like call like an nbc play-by-play caller because he was so skilled he could work for cbs because you suck paramount this is a terrible movie i did love i did love fizz though fizz was great um i was i was hoping he'd come back after he ran away to go. Imagine.

So other than like the heartbreaking story of him getting locked in the freezer. Imagine you're his mom. And after 20 years, he fucking shows up at your door. Because he definitely looks 20 years older. He was not. He didn't. He definitely aged a little bit. I also super hated Ed unclogging the milkshake machine with the plunger for the bathroom. I thought that was fucking stupid.

Yeah. I like how he calls it the jacuzzi machine, though. That was good. Who is Luna Fox? Do you know? Was that a real person? No, no. She's played by Nicole Byer, is the actress that plays her. Oh, that was a real person no no the she's played by nicole byer is the actress that plays

here oh that was a real person did you ever watch nailed it on netflix that like game show oh she was the host of that um and she's uh um she's a comedian too um oh oh gotcha the luna fox was not a real um that's a fictitious pop star played by... I'm pretty in touch with the pop culture. I honestly was surprised they didn't have a legit cameo there, though. They had so many cameos, and then

they made up a pop star. Yeah. Oh, my God. Whatever. It doesn't matter. Okay. I did like that they went to the roller rink for their party nothing wrong with that let's let's bring back roller rink like bowling alley combos that's that's once again that's when we were a proper country when the youths of america bowling alley i've never seen that combo yeah there was a in wakefield nebraska there was a i roll a ring wakefield nebraska there was a bowling alley roller rink

combo my uh my roller rinks have always just been roller rinks skate city baby there's the there's still a skate city kicking uh used to uh right by where I used to live. 120th and I-25, Skate City. Right behind the Village Inn and the La Quinta. When I worked for the Fremont Family YMCA Afterschool Child Care Program, we would go roller skating. Way too long of a name. We would go to the roller rink every Wednesday, and we'd have to walk the kids over there because it was

only like a half a block. And literally we had to make a rule because those little shitheads would try. I'm not good at skating, but you know, you'd have to go out there and like participate. And so I'm like lurking around and those little shits would try to skate in between my legs. And I almost killed three of them by falling on them with my full body weight and so there was a rule strict rule no skating in between heat's legs you will die if he lands on your head so anyways that was that was my story um same thing same thing with the uh ice rink. I used to hit up Skate City a bunch when I was in

seventh and eighth grade. I remember that was a nice spot to try to pick up the ladies at. Oh, dude, I remember little snowball skate, little couple skate. I can't remember what Michael Jackson

song it was. There was this one jackson slow song they'd always play that was like yeah i said the the skate city that i that i went to all the time they uh they were whoever the dj was was uh he was always a big beastie boys he would play beastie boys all the fucking time nice dude so like whatever whenever i sleep to pop up whenever i hear beastie boys especially the the girls song that's what it's called girls that takes me back to skate city every time dude oh i love grass monkey I love Grass Monkey That funky monkey That's

What was it? Paul Revere Oh my god Anyways, I'm just saying Beast Boy Sabotage At Skate City They would always do They do the couple dance

Or the couple skate And then they would always do uh they do the couple the couple dance uh or the couple skate and then they would always do the uh they had like a limbo challenge uh you'd have to do limbo yeah yeah yeah i that was that was not one that i ever partook in oh no no no no i never never never won a single challenge not like you you know uh the the limbo is tricky on the old two feet trying to get that limber doing it on skates are you kidding me there was always some crazy kids that would be able to like you know push it oh yeah like basically like lay flat as they would like doing some matrix and it's like get out of here yeah show off nerd nerd fucking losers dude fucking grow up to get swirlies

you sick bitches I hadn't thought about Skate City in a long fucking time what a place man anyways so at the skating rink though Keenan tries to hustle Ed and Ed is like listen man based on these insane calculations

I can give you $136. I'll give my accountant a call. Move some stuff around for you. Oh, my God. What did you think about that Hellman's garlic mayo placement? Keenan was eating his fries with garlic mayo? The product placement. Oh, yeah, that's a huge thing.

Garlic fries are very popular. Yeah. No, I know garlic fries are popular. I didn't know that they were just like, I don't know. People love garlic mayo? Well, people do like dipping fries in mayo. I know that. More like fancy sauce when you mix the mayo with the ketchup.

Oh, yeah, there's that. Or if you go to a restaurant and you have aioli dipping sauce, that's just mayo. I'm just okay on aiolis. Because it's just mayo. That's all it is. It belongs on a sandwich, not on my fries. But a lot of people do like to dip their fries in there, though. And people like...

That's the cheap way to get your garlic fries. If you don't have actual garlic fries, you can get some garlic mayo. You don't have to say that, Brandon. Get yourself some fucking ketchup. Like a real American. Dip your fries in ketchup. Or ranch.

My God. What happened to people dipping their ketchup? You dip things in ranch. First of all, the American Midwest is the only place that dips shit in ranch. Then

the rest of the country is ranch that's then the rest of the country is stupid well the rest of the country dabbles in the ranch dipping not nearly as much as as you know the middle of nowhere nebraska but if you go to if you go outside of america and ask for like ranch people look at you like you're fucking crazy no i would never ask for ranch outside of the country oh so you're not a true ranch head then well that's i that's i i i know my surroundings brandon you know what i do love to dip in ranch weirdly though is mozzarella sticks with some ranch that's not bad it's not bad it's not my first choice but you know in a pinch not too bad but to your point

the product placement in this movie is insane it's every every fucking scene yeah the doritos the door dash there's a there's a scene where three of them are whole like directly holding each other bag of doritos with it fucking facing the camera uh here let me strategic not like let me casually hold my bag of doritos because this is how people hold their bags of chips or the no the the orange soda scene you talk about where he goes through like 15 different sodas and he's like does it work on coke what about dr pepper what about root beer what about like the product the the the product placement was insane yeah i i enjoy some product placement if you do it in like a cheeky fun way like you know who's really you know who is really great at doing product placement especially in the the later seasons psych oh yeah yeah psych

was great at doing it because they would write it into the script and they would like mention it by name you know and they they would make it into like they would acknowledge the product placement and like make it into a part of the joke and you would laugh along with them exactly yeah uh well i mean listen psych is just a cut above the rest brand there's i'm on season five i'm still kind of slowly but surely watching it I need to rewatch it again oh dude the yin and yang episodes are so good

those ones are great like the one where Juliet on the clock tower and like Gus is like holding the oh man that one is so good yeah the Hitchcock episode is real good I'm getting close to the dual spires episode I think that's the best one is so good yeah yeah the hitchcock though the hitchcock episode is real good i'm i'm staying i'm getting close to the dual spires episode i think that's the best one i know we talked about it i

think i've said this in every single one of our kick years episodes but that's one of my favorite pieces of television ever that episode because i love psych is great yeah yeah they like uh all the references they make to twin peaks are like spot on and fucking perfect it's amazing it's uh that's another one i need to re-watch too i need to re-watch twin peaks the the wrestling references are my oh brandon you know what we can do the um friday the 17th episode because uh isn't yeah he's spoiler's in it. Yeah, he's... Spoiler alert, he plays the bad guy. He's the killer. Brandon, we're still doing that episode. We are doing that episode of Psych because

he makes the most insane wrestling tag team references and Sean's like, wait, whoa, that's where you're going? Eldon Henson is so good in that episode. The little jokes because he makes a bunch of jokes

to himself throughout the episode he's so good in that episode I fucking love that so we're going to do that we'll do an episode I'll cut out the part where I spoiled it yeah good what did you think

even though the episode is fucking 20 years old right now probably but it's amazing but okay so Ed oh my god Ed gets a new grill I forgot about that and then the weird lawyer

dude recruits Keenan to scam Kel and he has a llama farm fucked up there should have had an alpaca farm one idiot but you anyone with 32 and a half bathrooms in their house must have shit for brains whoa shot at russell wilson dude why is it's because he's always cooking he's got his shit all the time oh my god all right so uh uh but long story short they want to franchise good burger and expand it out and um we get kenan and cal on the original rooftop scamming scamming scamming yeah well so the cecil i think is his name right the lawyer yeah cecil yeah the lawyer lil rel he uh he keeps mentioning he's working for an unknown

buyer client an unnamed client because he knows who they are obviously but yeah yeah well he doesn't even mention that so um the very end like right right when they're getting ready to i think at the lunch but yeah he won't he won't tell him who he's working for just you know keep the suspense mystery yeah and you knew that contract was trouble all the way through but uh yeah that uh that dinner meeting also had so much just dumb shit in it with Ed and the lawyer with the super salad.

And then the waiter. Yeah. Yeah, it was not great. He lies and says the OG I almost called it Whataburger. The original Whataburger. The original

Whataburger gets to stay open, but everything else is dead. But yeah. And then we get the global party. That's the thing that sells Ed on it. Is that

they tell him we just want to franchise it. You can keep the original one. And then we'll franchise it out worldwide. And then, yeah. Spoiler alert. Newsflash. That's a lie.

Yeah, because we are party and hearty at the Good Burger. We got a burger pinata full of fries. Yeah. Five second rule. Young Gravy, mix of cameo appearance.

I fucking hate Young Gravy. What? I don't get Young Gravy's appeal at all. I always like that song from the first Sister Act movie. It's like, I need gravy. All my mashed potatoes.

Give me gravy. If you treat me wrong. I have no idea what song that is. Oh. Is that by the gravy? No, no. I don't know who sings it, but the heavier set nun puts it on the jukebox at a biker bar and dances with the girls honey gravy on my mashed potatoes give me gravy

i'll say i'll send you a link to that yeah to the song right now yeah send me the spotify link for sure that'll be that'll be on the on the top of your list next year yeah did you get your spotify raps yeah i did it's my it's it's it's real weird i mean i mean it's not like weird it's it's rush twiddle i said i was gonna get bugs in harmony morgan wallen okay i was gonna guess nothing but lord of the rings soundtrack that was my guess uh you know i actually have been listening to a lot more rush for work than lord of the rings soundtrack that's that's a good that's a good call out there that's why rush was my number one the buddy uh i said the buddy i went to the the eagles game with

um last night one of the buddies he uh he was showing me his and his top uh his top like listen to thing was the pirates of the caribbean soundtrack that's amazing yeah that's amazing dude i got bro step as one of my top genres hell yeah dude you know that's a boogie t who's my bro step dude uh bone thugs and harmony in the top five you know i've just that's it kelly was like kelly's like he give me your mount rushmore of rappers i was like man how do i choose one of the bone thugs out of there maybe i feel like i feel i feel like you could see that's with with that it's always tricky because like in all honesty i would i would want to put all of bone thugs as one yeah you know could you is that allowed then i don't think so

but like if you could if it's my mount if it's my mount rush well i'm allowing that you know okay perfect like it's like you just do like the like there's like like if you do how many heads are i'm not rush morgan four i think it's four so you do so you do three big heads and then you do like the like there's like like if you do how many heads are on mount rushmore again four i think it's four so you do so you do three big heads and then you do like a row like a row of little babies are you just or do like a little mini cluster you do like the the the peak. The honorable mentions. It's like a wreath and it's EZ's face and it's all the bone thugs around him.

Yeah. Wait, dude, Cleveland. Cleveland. Cleveland is the city where we come from, so run, run, run. East 1990, 99, 99, 99. Anyways. run run uh east 1999 99 99 anyways bone thugs in harmony east 1999 eternal is

it it's it lives forever man like i owned it it was my first cd i just i brought it back this year brandon my god how's your uh how's your, how's your vinyl collection going? Oh, dude, you know what? We're about to dust off fucking like literally we're about to dust this off.

And as soon as we're done with this podcast, death row, Christmas album. Let's fucking go, dude. Christmas in the ghetto. I can't fucking wait. It's about to be the highlight it's going okay but that's probably one of the highlights you know death row Christmas come on let's go Kelly wants to buy a house though so we gotta quit

buying dumb shit that's the new rule I mean good luck Kelly good luck we're about to be house poor Brandon where are you gonna buy a house dumb shit. That's the new rule. I mean, good luck, Kelly. Good luck. We're about to be house poor, Brandon. Where are you going to buy a house? Oh, actually, speaking of Young Gravy,

when he started playing a song and they did the group dance, I actually put my notes. I hate this. Oh, yeah. This is where I cancel my Paramount Plus subscription. I put that yes that was rough that's what happened um that was rough and then anyways this this is when the lawyer announces that he hoodwinked them in the contract and everyone blames dexter yeah and

everyone plays dexter and yeah everyone hates them but then they are strategizing and we see ed playing bunny smash you know nothing like tickling some bunnies brandon wait is this before after the when do we get the the celebrity song that happens at he's playing tickle bunnies and then he's like what if we had got a whole bunch of celebrities together to sing for good burger and then that's the song that they played in the credits i think oh okay that fucking shit was so crazy it i i hope that they were like poking fun at like the celebrities that did that during covid that's that was a joke right that's 100 what it was yeah yeah that was the the one joke that like landed yeah but but at the same time i was i was like god it just it just reminded me of how much i hate all like everyone

in in the movie industry right now like i'm all the way up randon on hollywood it gave us it gave us a second duck connection though did you see who popped in towards the end yeah tommy yeah i saw pete yeah danny tamberelli dude danny fucking tamberelli dude you gotta get pete and pete on a nickelodeon show that has a thousand you know references but exactly dude pete pete fucking fucking tommy dude tommy and russ they weren't even in the same ducks movie you know but but you know what you but they still connected heath you know why because once a duck always a duck heath don't bring you you're just you are just saying that because you want you want to keep you're just holding on to the game changers brandon i don't get it i don't get your loyalty to that speaking of speaking of game changers we also have a third ducks connection in this movie heath i don't know if you caught it oh the well you told

me off like i think right the the lady the lady security guard the the one that's that's chumming it up with ron she is there's a reason why no one recognized her from game changers season two because she was in there for like a half a second they played a whole game against their team she's one of the coaches in season two of Game Changers. I forget which team she coached. It was coach. It was team. Team Dominate.

No, team Dominate was fucking Josh Duhamel. Do you know that's right? Team team. She was like team strategy or something. No, it started with like a team dump trucks. Not deep dump trucks, but she was a coach in season two.

She was in season two of Game Changers. Okay. Her name is Molly Kearney. She's also on SNL. That's probably what most people would recognize her from. She's on SNL. Is she funny on there? I haven't seen an episode of SNL in like 20 years, dude.

Do people still watch that show? I assume so. They're still making it. Well, it doesn't mean people watch that show? I assume so. They're still making it. Well, it doesn't mean people watch it. Somebody has to watch it in order for them to justify to keep making it. I don't know. I feel like that's like that one restaurant

where you're like, how do they stay open? What's the deal there? Because it's not funny anymore, is it? You used to at least see clips on the internet about it being funny. When's the last time it's not funny anymore is it like i used to at least see clips on the internet about it being funny like when's the last time it's been funny i did see a bunch of clips they i guess there was an episode with um oh keenan did dion that was a good one that that was that's a good impression there's also one with uh do you know you know nate bargazzi or bargazzi yeah so he he

hosted um like a month or so two months back i saw a bunch of clips for that um oh okay but it was also like the caption on those clips are like this is the funniest snl thing in years so like it's whoa it's been a while like whoa got something funny on here this is this is insane yeah but yeah i haven't watched in a while so i don't know how good uh you know you know why especially now why i don't watch it in a while, so I don't know how good... You know why, especially now why I don't watch it is because those fucking... They just released a movie to...

It's those three fucking kids that they just got on the last two seasons or so of SNL. And they're all fucking the unfunniest nepo babies in the world. What's it called? They have like a group name like Lonely Island.

Please Don't Destroy is the name of their group. Oh, and that's what that's what that it's like on Peacock, right? It's on Peacock because you know why it's on Peacock? Because the only reason they're on SNL and the only reason they're uh have any kind of job in the entertainment industry because they're not fucking funny at all is because they're fucking uh all three of their dads are like nbc ceos or you know top level executives they're the most nepo babies in the world and they're not funny and every time time I see their faces, I want to fucking punch them. I saw a preview for that movie and I never wanted to watch anything less.

Yeah. It looks terrible. There wasn't anything funny. I would rather watch game changer. I'd rather be forced to watch game changers the rest of my life than watch that movie. Brandon. Woof. Ooh. rather be forced to watch game changers the rest of my life than watch that movie uh brandon at that point you just stop watching tv like it's at that point at that point you just

that's that's when i go skydiving and don't pull the chute no i i i fucking hate those three those three though. They fucking drive me crazy. They're so unfunny. Anyways, all right. So back to the movie, Brandon. I agree. Everything that Hollywood is pumping out right now is trash. I'm getting ready to cancel everything. I already canceled Netflix, Paramount+.

I'm coming for you all. I'm going back to fucking cable, dude. I'm going back to fucking cable. I think we need to. I'm coming for you all. I'm going back to fucking cable, dude. I'm going back to fucking cable. I think we need to. I know this is all. Nepo babies have always been a problem in Hollywood going back to the beginning. But I feel like it keeps getting more and more egregious. We need to make a.

We need to as society. We need to come together and make a stance to where if you're... You can't do what your parents did. No more family businesses. No more following in your parents' footsteps. Pick a different career, you fucking loser.

I feel like someone that takes over the family restaurant is different than... Family restaurants will allow. That's true. That's the exception. Like a mom and pop shop. Like on Main Street in a Hallmark movie. Only restaurants, though. If it's like a hardware store,

get a new fucking job. Wow, dude. What if it's a Christmas card store, Brandon? There's no fucking Christmas card stores, dude. Christmas is dead. Okay. I mean, you're not wrong.

As a society, we have just completely... You know what? As a society, we've gone into the grinder. That was a good call out, though. Restaurant. Family restaurants. That's the exception to the rule. We'll allow family restaurants.

But everything else, you know, no more following in footsteps. family restaurants, that's the exception to the rule. We'll allow family restaurants. But everything else, no more following in footsteps. Make your own path, Heath. Pull yourself up by your own bootstraps. I mean, you're talking to someone who has just kind of bounced all over the country and has no idea what he's doing. So, yeah, I get it. I get your philosophy. Follow very similar pathways.

Okay, let's get back to this. So, yeah, they do the celebrity song, which, like I said was was a fairly good joke one of the only ones that landed um loved seeing um dana tamberelli always loved seeing tommy and then um but now they're going they decide they're going to mega court yeah we're offices confrontation we're because we got it we got to see who's behind all this yep they're not gonna take no for an answer Ron killed it in this scene I thought he'd be fucking hilarious it's uh I mean yeah he was pretty funny

where they come in they're like we're not taking no for an answer he's like alright head on up to the top floor no wait visitor's badge yeah i love it's skipping ahead a little bit but i love uh when they come back and he's like uh confronting them and he's like uh he's like i just need to see your ids and keaton freaks out he's like he's all right do you have id yeah and they make the the camera crew go to the media set. This is where you get with the fucking psycho AI dog thing when you get to Kurt.

And you know what? They fucked up, dude. And maybe this was it, too, because I was so mad. Not once, not once did Kurt's sister call, like, didn't speak into the third person and did not once say she was gonna put them in the grinder no she definitely i didn't even think about that but now that you imagined it um she definitely should have referred she should have called herself uh in the third person that would have been a great fucking callback. Who bought Good Burger? Kat bought Good Burger.

Now Kat's going to put Good Burger in the grinder. See? Like you said, they go like 90% of the way, and then they just for whatever reason, whether it's laziness

or just not not knowing the source material this is what happens when ai edits your script brand and i think we can call a spade a spade is that they just fucking suck at their jobs yeah i know we were talking about this offline i forget if we mentioned it uh on the pod already but like if you told me that ai wrote this script that if they went to like chat what is it chat gbt or whatever it's called and was like write good burger too and this is exactly what came out it would not surprise me did I send you the meme

where in France the way you have to say chat gpt is cat farted cat farts is it gpt or gbt p I always said b I I got to fix that. But it's like chat j'ai pété.

And it's like cat farts. Anyways, it's very funny. And so every time they're like, ooh, are students using cat farts to write their papers? Are cat farts funny? I don't think I've ever been around a cat when it farted. I don't think it would be that funny.

They're always silent and all of a sudden it's like... You know what is funny? It's dog farts because they always scare themselves. They never know it was them that did it. So... Okay.

So, Kurt's sister, who is also from Pitch Perfect. She's Jillian Bell. Yeah, Pitch Perfect. No, not Pitch Perfect. She's from Workaholics. That's what I meant. I was still thinking Adam Devine.

She was, yeah, Workaholics, 22 Jump Street. Yeah, she's Jillian in Workaholics. Which is her actual name, Jillian Bell. And the Workaholics, when they go to the Juggalo Fest, because they set her up with the doctor or whatever, that is really good stuff. That's one of my favorite episodes um uh okay so anyways um but yeah this is i literally

put because they go and they do the ai ads and i was like just when i thought this couldn't get any worse it gets so much worse what does she call it she calls calls it... I forgot. I didn't write that down. What did she call it? It was... Oh, Edimatronics. That's right. Edimatronics. That was...

So something like that. Now that I'm saying it out loud, it just doesn't sound right. But something along those lines. Although, did you hear what the price was? It was only $8 for that value meal. Yeah. This must have been pre-Biden. Yeah, that's what I was saying.

I was like, you now, have you seen the it's like $16 for a fucking burger at McDonald's. Who eats fast food anymore? It's not fast. It's not convenient. And it's so fucking expensive. The whole point of fast food was that it's quick and cheap and

you move on with your life yeah so now you may as well go get fucking gourmet burger with like you know a dude in the back with a goatee and a whole bunch of tattoos i put a balsamic glaze on your goat cheese burger dude let's fucking go what get a craft beer what uh oddly specific memory are you pulling from here there's so many places like that in houston people are people are like giving like a hypothetical example and they get way too specific and you're like okay this is this isn't hypothetical anymore have you ever had like a nice goat cheeseburger though with like a balsamic drizzle with a little little tomato fresh springs a goat cheeseburger is that what you're saying yeah no i mean

wait what uh what was it was it go at remember did you ever did you ever go to like lunch root down with us or did you just mainly do brunch because they know i've always brunch to them they had like a uh some kind of burger that wasn't like uh your standard beef i forget if that was goat or not but i had that it was okay i want to say i want to say it was goat, but that's okay. I don't know. I'm not a – I don't know. I don't – like those kind of weird like burgers or like elk burgers or bison burgers or whatever. Yeah.

Not my cup of tea. Like if I'm going to eat bison – like give me like a bison steak or like an elk steak, you know, rather than like a burger. I'm all in on the blue cheese. Like anything, any burger with blue cheese on it, that's probably what I'm going to steer for. Or like a Swiss mushroom. Classic. Classic Swiss mushroom.

I'm not a big mushroom guy. Well, is it the texture? Yeah. Do you like doing mushrooms? Just not eating them? I don't mind it. I don't do them all that often, but I've dabbled. Anyways, all right.

So we got the assembly line. You know, everyone is – did you hear him say that from now on, employees will poop on their own time. Zero employees, maximum profits. Welcome to capitalism, baby. Yeah, there you go. I've been trying to tell you that for, what is this, 80 episodes now. And you never, you're finally starting to listen. Finally starting to listen finally starting to listen yeah let's just wait until

there's AI dogs patrolling your neighborhood when you're out past curfew taking baseball bat to the first fucking one I see all right so so yeah anyways that long story short they see the control room they're gonna launch all the

good burgers in 24 hours kurt's sister puts them in the automatic car to put them brandon where six feet in the grinder well so wait so what was her she didn't have like a diabolical plan right it was just it was just maximum profits no employees right yeah she was going to squash good burger that was it she just wanted to crush good burger in the honor of her disgraced brother wasn't her brother trying to poison people, though? Or accidentally poison people? Kurt's Burgers, sometimes, because of the astropopoline or whatever, Kurt's Burgers sometimes poison Kurt's customers. I don't think it was astropopoline or whatever he said.

I'm pretty sure it was. He's put in, like, horse steroids or some shit, wasn't he? Well, if you google astropropylene you'll find out i don't think that's funny yeah it was that's what it was that's what they were putting in the grinder kurt understands kurt's recipes brand. You wouldn't understand Kurt. Oh, you know who we didn't get a cameo from? It was fucking Spatch, dude. Oh, yeah. That would have been nice, too.

Oh, my God. I hated when they just spun cookies, like, you know, whipping shitties in the park until the electric car died. And they fell asleep, and then they woke up and then it died i forgot i hated that i forgot about that part my god but ed um you know ed rallying the troops at his house man he's got he's got the kids there i i actually wrote after when Ed was meeting with all the kids and they were making the plan, I wrote, man, I looked at how much time was left in this movie 10 minutes

ago. The last 10 minutes felt like an hour. Like we said, it's not good. It doesn't fly by, that's for sure. Yeah, but long story short, they hatch a master plan brandon and in this master plan they decide they're gonna break into the control room and keenan's niece is like we're

gonna delete all the energy files so they won't be able to have power unlike he-Man Brandon they won't have the power have you watched He-Man lately no I haven't seen He-Man in decades dude okay wait hold on sorry quick side tangent you know what I bought with my Amazon free credits that I get when I

choose extended shipping guess what I bought Captain Planet. Dude, it is so... Captain Planet, he's a hero. Gonna take pollution down to zero. Oh, my God, dude. It's such a banger.

Kelly watched it with me. She was like, this show's kind of good. She's like, this is a good message. I was like, you're goddamn right. i get this is a good message i was like you goddamn right fire wind water heart go planet gaia is their boss mother earth my god fucking kelly man dude fucking kelly gave me covid dude after i shoved her ass in quarantine all thanksgiving so i wouldn't get sick she gets me sick the morning of the broncos game i was so mad i yelled at her a little bit just out of pure just like did you miss the we missed the the mutton

races right is that what it's called yeah mutton busting dude it's my favorite oh that was so fun at the rodeos those little kids just getting kicked around i sent i sent you the video i know and i was just oh dude you don't even know i've i've talked about how mad i've been about missing that game for every day this week because i'm so fucking mad about it because i just i i felt great and then sunday morning i but like luckily i didn't go because i'm so fucking mad about it because i just i i felt great and then sunday morning i but like luckily i didn't go because i like died i i could not get out of bed for 48 hours like physically but so that was good but i was just god kelly dude she just works with kids and she's just a petri dish of just disgusting germs. I now make her wash herself clean.

As soon as she comes home, she has, she, she has to go like completely sterilize herself so that those kids boogers are not anywhere in our house. All right. So to, to round this out,

we break into Megacorp. We're using real Ed as a fake Ed. Yeah, Megacorp, talk about fucking, you know, doing the all-time dummy fucking move is you make the robots look exactly like your arch nemesis. What are we doing here? That doesn't make any sense. But what I did like was Ron Funchess when he was inspect was inspecting he's like why did you put a booger in

there that was the only time i laughed out loud actually i was like oh oh ron oh ron it's just his delivery is so good so good i hated ed jr and ruth's dance distraction hated that ruth oh the old lady i was like who the is ruth my bad and the this is where my notes start to fall off because i was just like okay there's like 15 minutes left let's get this over with like come on um and but they they're breaking in and they're having a standoff with the security guard and the back and forth and the chasing they had the weird pandemic hoax to clear out the um to clear out the control room it It wasn't a pandemic Coke. It was radioactive material. Same difference. Coke?

Coke was not radioactive. You know that, right? I think, I feel like it's important that you know that. Brandon, they dropped a vial. It did things to the people and they panicked. I wasn't paying attention. I thought it was a disease. I didn't hear that it was like acid or whatever. Yeah, I was like, I think I thought it was a disease. I didn't hear that it was acid or whatever.

Yeah, I think you said it was radioactive material. Oh, I completely missed that. I just saw a broken thing on the ground. I was like, oh, they did another COVID reference. Anyways, how did you feel about ed's fart to give them away when that was the the war like it once again like it's too much it's too much who was who was especially in that writer's room when they when they zoom in on on the butt and his like pants are moving and and keenan and the niece are sitting right there and dude they could not have been closer i hated that um mia gets caught in the fry thing

like a lunatic i don't know what the fuck she was doing on the fry thing yeah i don't know why yeah that was fucking terrifying though yeah and but then you're stuck in that fucking thing but then dexter can't get caught me too brandon me too that's why that's a safety precaution yeah oh my god anyways yeah dexter saves mia but then they get caught by the security people when they're stuck in the fry machine. And so they take them back to the control room. And what do we have? We have Ed playing space bunnies, and he's getting ready to tickle those bunnies like a son of a bitch. I like that the thug likes that game too. But anyways, just like last time, Brandon, Ed didn't do what he was supposed to do.

He was just playing the game. And so they are, yeah, Kurt's sister, when she's getting ready to put him in the grinder, hits the button to turn on all the Mega Burgers, and then we realize all the Eds go insane, start throwing food, acting crazy. Reprogrammed to go wackadoo, Brandon. Yep. Because he's, yeah, he was thinking to himself,

he's like, if I just shut down the power, they're just going to, they they're gonna just launch tomorrow you know yeah and then the ai eds put kurt's sister in the grinder i i hated the laser eyes too that was the dumbest thing i've ever that was crazy could have killed somebody hated that i mean we're all gonna die when AI takes over the world and just nukes us. Because we are, like war games, we are the infection. Or iRobot. Oh, dude. When's the last time you've watched war games?

The little Matthew Broderick joint. That movie's so good. A long time. I watched it a couple years ago. I put it back on. I saw it's on hbo i might watch it it's a good movie um but anyways yeah so um long story short kurt's sister in the grinder we end where the people overcome the machines and we realize brandon there's nothing better than your mom and pop burger shop over that

AI and then Kenan's sister is Leslie Jones and then Ed Jr that fucking moron puts his car through the building puts his car through the building invents permanent ice

yep and then they do a trap remix of I'm a dude he's a dude who is Ed Jr. I don't know you've been calling him Ed Jr. this entire time and his real name is

Ed 2 so well I hope he hasn't been in too much well I hope he hasn't been in too much his name is Alex Hibbert he was

he was in Black Panther he played young Oakland kid listen I have nothing against this kid I just I did not like the character of Ed too Ed too. Ed Jr., if you will. Interesting.

Did you like Ed Jr.? He kind of looks like Brawny. I'm looking at his IMDB. Oh, he was in Moonlight. Okay. He was in Moonlight. But he like, what movie was that in? He was in a TV show called the shy right is that how you would say that like short for chicago the the she i don't know i'm assuming it's the shy but in the the steals for that uh he kind of looks like brawny brawny jr

or brawny jones either way i don't like him i'm sure he's a great person but i don't like the character do you think brownie's gonna play sure he's gonna sit it out i think he's gonna play again i don't know we'll see who knows probably won't make it to the nba unless well do you want to talk about a nepo nba he'll get he'll get drafted um or he'll so somebody will sign him even if he doesn't get g league bring him on any g league team would sign him just to get fans and butts and seats oh you'll i guarantee you wherever lebron is they'll sign they'll they'll sign brani to their g league team no they'll sign a contract they'll sign them to the nba team for like for like a one-year deal

and then LeBron will play. It'll be like LeBron's last year. He'll retire and then if Bronny's not good, they'll just cut him and be like, okay, we got our year with LeBron. Peace. Hey, Brandon. I think it's cakey rating

time, huh? Cakey rating time. I didn't even really. I almost forgot about the cakey ratings. I was just so disgusted with this movie. I was trying to cleanse my palate of this evilness. You know what you should do? You should head on over to Arby's, get yourself a good burger, cleanse that palate. Actually, where's the closest Arby's to golden how the fuck would how the fuck would i know where your closest arby's is you shouldn't you should know this you're from here you're from

colorado you're from denver yeah i'm not like an arm i don't know where every no where every arby's is in denver brandon you're fucking dude you're i don't know what's wrong with you i'm not know what's wrong with you i'm not know what's wrong with you dude you know what i've had stuck in my head though recently too is whopper whopper double whopper speaking of that and spotify wrapped i saw a uh a real the the uh this morning and it was like uh somebody spotify wrapped and that was their number one song yep saw that too that's why i just got put back in my head that's why i just say because it's because it's always on the nfl commercials too like the um like when you watch the game on fox

or whatever you know it's like the best the best was the best was last year um with damar hamlin after that happened and the people that would make the cuts where it's like him like dead on the on the on the field and then whopper whopper you didn't see those though that was great i i did it's it's you know someone almost someone's son almost died brandon i just don't think it's very funny. Well, it wasn't back then. It is now. It is now because he's still playing. Dude, I feel bad for him

because the Bills specifically... What if they don't make the playoffs? What I'm saying is the Bills and the NFL are milking this shit for every fucking dollar they can get out of him because they show him. It's like with Taylor Swift. Every every after every single play, he's not even playing.

He's on the bench and they cut to him. They're like, here's the here's the guy who almost died. Remember that? Yeah. Yeah. It's we had a player almost die on the field, but now he's not dead. Yeah. Look at us.

Great. Good. Great story. Right. Right. Yeah. Comeback player of the year. He didn't even play a game game actually i think he i think he did play in the broncos game i think he he came in at the end but someone would have killed him you know what the what a twist

that he dies in his first game back you know what the wildest thing was though is um i was watching one of the bills games earlier this season and and they had to bring the stretcher out for somebody else and put him in the ambulance because he messed up his leg or whatever. And on the ambulance, the Buffalo Bills team ambulance that they keep at the stadium, on the back window is a memorial decal for damar hamlin that's like the number three nice that's good first first of all he got hurt in cincinnati that's not even the ambulance he rode in second he's still alive he's not fucking dead yeah why are we memorializing him he's not dead he's in a body bag dude he got cloned that's. That's what happened. Dude, I feel like if I was him, I would be fucking fed up with this shit. I'd be like, take my fucking number off the ambulance. I didn't even go in because we were in fucking Cincinnati.

Hey, Brandon, what's your rating? Did you go? No. I'll go first. I'm giving it a 1.25 because it's not good it's a waste of time don't watch it but it's better than buddy games

what did I rate buddy games half so two buddy games two you gave a.5 we both gave a.5 buddy games one you gave a negative five yeah that's worth it uh this one gets a 1.5 for me i was i was gonna say i was gonna say 1.5 before you said 1.25 i i hated everything about this i am so sick of these movie studios doing the nostalgia stuff wrong every fucking the most egregious doing yeah it's the it's i said it

before right they that we we like nostalgia because stuff was actually good then we don't like we don't want you to bring it back and just throw it in our face and be like good hair you fucking like this don't you it's like no we don't go fuck yourselves you at least gotta try like the like it wasn't good it wasn't funny it says flush it as bad as game changers was you could tell they were they were trying something right they were trying to to kickstart the first season the first well yeah yeah they were they were trying to do something it was still bad but they were trying this one they this one was legit just like go hey keen and kill go stand in front of the camera that's all that's all that's all we need you to do something it was still bad but they were trying this one the this one was legit just like go hey keen and kill go stand in front of the camera that's all that's all that's all we need you to do don't because the the the writing is terrible yeah you know who probably could have

helped this movie i'm just kidding i was gonna say dan schneider i thought you were gonna say damar hamlin yeah you know what they could have killed him in this movie it would have been funny but uh but the writing the writing is terrible it's very it's it's everything is half-assed you can tell keenan is putting like like i said i love him but he's he's he is clocked out he is he is phoning this in he is not in this he got paid he's moving on the only one that is like giving effort is kel because this is his resurrection song yeah but everything they give him the material is terrible so it's just it's it's one of those things where it's like if we're

if you're not even gonna try why are we doing this at all you know like it's just such a waste of time yeah it's a waste it yeah that's that's the best way You know, like it's just such a waste of time. Yeah. It's a waste. Yeah. That's, that's the best way to describe this movie. It's just an app. Like there are so many things that you can do with an hour and a half in this world,

whether good, bad, ugly, I don't care. It's don't spend it on this movie. Stay far away. It's not worth it. Yeah.

Just. Yeah. It's just, no, no, nobody, nobody was trying at all. It was, it's not worth it yeah just yeah it's just nobody nobody was trying at all it was it's the most it's the most egregious like straight up nostalgic fast grab i've seen in a while because yeah they didn't even try they were just they threw out um they just threw key didn't kill out front they were like that's here you go yeah you this? Yeah. It's just a shit burger. That's all it was. thanks for listening everyone please remember to follow and like us on instagram at the cake eaters pod on twitter at the cake eaters also reach out to us via email, thecakeeaterspod at gmail.com

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