The Chaser Report - AI Replaced Our Interns

Episode Date: December 11, 2022

In this episode, we will be taking a humorous look at GPT, or Generative Pretrained Transformer, the language generation model developed by OpenAI. We will explore some of the funny and ridiculous things that GPT can do, such as generating humorous responses to prompts and creating absurd and nonsensical text...But don't worry, we won't get too serious - this is a comedy podcast after all! So sit back, relax, and join us for a hilarious look at GPT.This bio was written by ChatBot and our producer has been sacked. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

The Chaser Report is recorded on Gatigal Land. Striving for mediocrity in a world of excellence, this is The Chaser Report. Hello and welcome to The Chaser Report. I'm Charles Firth. And hello, Dom. I'm an AI-powered chatbot that has Dom's voice and Dom's personality defect. What would you like to ask me? So the thing is, during the beat, a few months ago, actually, I introduced the world to GPTT,

AI engine, right, which is artificial intelligence, because, and I got very scared, because this is probably about a year ago, actually, because I asked it to write a whole lot of chaser headlines, and it did a not half bad job, remember? Oh, hang on a second, I'm just dropping, pretending to be the chatbot. That's right, because we've been talking about GPT all year, and our friend, Anselva up here has just done a whole investigation into AI for background briefing. She's going to come on and tell us about that in a couple of weeks. But, yes, this time last year, you did get the AI to generate.

all the chaser headlines. Yes. And it did an all right job, but probably not quite good enough, right? I mean, better than many and intern. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I mean, no, not the interns who you know, the people who sort of pitch headlines to us. Yeah.

But some of them made sense. What has happened in the last week is a group who exists within this company called OpenAI, which developed GPT3, have been focusing on trying to actually create a sort of human-like interface. for GPT3, so that instead of having to sort of go through this fairly difficult process of trying to work out how to prompt the AI into writing what you want to ride, you can just chat with it like an ordinary human being, and it basically gives you really good responses, right? And it's sort of scary. It's actually, it's got to the point where artificial intelligence,

certainly you just go, well, I think it's going to wipe out marketing, for example, as an industry. Oh, gosh, that's such, I'm so torn on that. So, name, like, I've got chatbot open here. Okay. So, Dom, name a product that you want to have some slogans for, and we'll ask the chatbot what, they just name any product. It should be a real product. I mean, I'm tempted to put the inflatable avocado in there, but I feel like we don't get that enough.

All right, right, right, right, 10 slogans, uh, maybe, Advertisants. Yeah, advertising slogans for an inflatable avocado pool toy. Yeah. For an inflatable avocado toy. Okay. Just quick. Then it goes, okay, these are the ones.

Now, I'll warn you here, it's only been around a week. It learns at a rapid pace. These are not necessarily going to be the best things, but they'll do a mediocre job. The whole idea is you'll probably get some answers that are, you know, Somebody with a couple of years of experience would come up with. I'll read them out to you. And they've only got to be better than a first-year graduate, right? Yeah, exactly.

To ensure that no graduates ever hired ever again. Well, this is my plan. Right, so these are the suggestions. Make a splash with the coolest avocado in town. See, that's not bad. It's got a pun. Sink your toes into summer fun with an inflatable avocado pool toy. I mean, these are better than yours, to be clear.

Add a touch of fun to your pool. pool party with an inflatable avocado. I love that you're giving it the sort of retail read as well. I might just, because they're all a bit similar, aren't they? Avocado lovers rejoice. The ultimate pool toy has arrived. Imagine the genuine excitement that it's

clearly generated faking. Look at this. Tired of boring pool toys, try an inflatable avocado instead. I like that somehow in its computer brain it realized that avocado is an unconventional design for a ball toy.

Bring the taste of summer to your pool with an inflatable avocado. So it's worked out that it's an edible thing that's a pool toy. That's very impressive. It's very clever. I mean, that's better than most. This is the thing. It doesn't need to be better than like a really clever person who's generated a like award-winning ad. It's got to be better than most marketing mailouts.

And frankly, that's already better than most press releases in that it didn't seem to have any typos in it. Write a paragraph. Like of an email, selling avocado pool toys. Let's see if you can do it. He's actually doing this in real time. He's talking the same as we speak. We'll see if you can do that. Dear valued customers, summer is just around the corner,

and what better way to beat the heat than by lounging in the pool with a refreshing beverage and an inflatable avocado pool toy. Our avocado pool toys are made of high quality, durable materials, and are designed to withstand hours of fun in the sun. Plus, they're a hit with kids and adults alike, so everyone can enjoy the cool, refreshing fun of an inflatable avocado pool toy. Order now and make a splash this summer.

That's amazing. That's pretty good. What it's done is, I love that it says it's made of high-quality materials because it wouldn't possibly know to chase a product that isn't. That's marketing for you. You don't have to know.

The thing is, it's ingested millions of bullshitty emails marketing stuff that have been written by humans, and it somehow generated the pure essence of absolute bullshit for that email. I'm so impressed. So I'll tell you why, the spidey sense that I got where it was like, oh my God, this is going to replace everything, right, is I was at the bar on Saturday night with Gabby Bold, right?

We've just done a show down in Melbourne. And she was lamenting how she's only got a month to write her next show, which premieres in Perth in late January, right? It's called Odsock. You can buy tickets now. And she was going, I don't know, I don't have any ideas for songs.

Like, what are some ideas for songs? So I typed into chatbot, give me 10 suggestions for comedy songs. And they were brilliant, right? Like, there were some really good ideas, including one,

which sticks with me to this day. I hope that she does it. I don't know whether she will, because I think she sort of thinks of it as cheating. But the suggestion was an anthem them to the procrastinator, right? And my thought is, that is a great idea for a song because you go about how I don't really know what I'm going to write,

yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, you use the fact that you don't have to write many words. No, you just start writing it, do a couple of, and then you say, oh, look, and I'll put it off. Write ten suggestions for comedy songs. I'll just do it again, see, because it comes up with different suggestions each time you do it. Oh, the first one is called The Song that Nobody Wants to Hear. That's a great idea. That's very good.

That actually applies to all the songs I've ever written. The next one is my ex-girlfriend's new boyfriend. It might be a bit grim. The Ballad of a Failed Entrepreneur. That's my song. That's Charles's song! How did it know? A tale of two breakups.

There once was a man called Charles, and his ideas for business were the worst. It writes itself. We actually, we can probably get it to write this. Oh, let's get it to write this song. Let me just go through the other suggestions because these are great. The lament of a middle-aged man. That's great.

How does it know? That's me. The misadventures of a clumsy person. And that's not as good. The perils of online dating. The trials and tribulations of parenting. The joys of being single. The struggles of being a mourning person.

They're not very good. But this is the stuff that comedy is all about. The ballot of a failed entrepreneur. write the first verse of a comedy song called The Ballad of a Failed Entrepreneur. There once was a man who had a dream to start his own business and make it gleam. He put all his savings and time in his plan, but little did he know it wouldn't pan. He started out small with just a few sales, but soon he was in debt and headed for failure. That didn't really work.

He tried... Oh, but certainly accurate. He tried everything, but nothing seemed to work. And now he's stuck with a business that's a big old jerk. Okay. I mean, look, it's not perfect. It's not going to win awards, but it certainly would get a standing ovation. Yeah, I think that's a musical comedy night.

The Chaser Report, less news, more often. So, I think the point is, what I was thinking, because you can hook, so they've got an API, which is like an application programming interface, which means that you can hook other programs into this engine, right, and give things intelligence. And I was thinking, what we should do is because they've got some amazing voice bots now that actually make, create realistic sounding voices, right? And you can train it on your own voice. It takes a while.

Cam's been doing it with my voice. It's something like 80 hours. A digital child. Yeah. Right. And you have to read out all these. really weird sentences and it trains up. I know people who've done this, yeah, like radio presenters.

Yeah. And so what I'm thinking we do is we match that engine with the open AI chatbot engine and we get it next year to make the Chaser Report podcast without us having to do any work. What a brilliant idea. Yeah, so just each day we say, can you do a show today? Hmm. And then it'll just spit out a show. And it will still probably be better than if we did.

Can you actually, that's a good question, Charles. Can you please get it to write a compelling pitch for people to subscribe to the Chaser Report podcast? Oh, I think I think, should I do that now? Yeah, I want to hear what it says. Write a compelling pitch about why people could listen to the Chaser Report podcast. If you're a news junkie who wants to stay informed about the latest happenings in the world, then the Chaser Report podcast is for you.

Our team of experienced journalists and commentators provides an in-depth analysis and commentary on the top stories of the day, offering a unique perspective that you won't find anywhere else. So it knew that it was about, this is the crazy thing. So it knew that it was topical, but it couldn't work out that it was kind of humorous. Okay. With engaging interviews and thoughtful discussions, the change. Chaser Report keeps you up to date on the most important issues of the day. Plus, our lively and humorous hosting team keeps things entertaining.

So you'll never be bored. I mean, we're obviously not lively or humorous, but at least they knew that we were trying to do a comedy podcast. Yeah, tune into the Chaser Report. And it's even capital, I didn't capitalize Chaser Report, but in the... It must have somehow Googled the fact that there was a real podcast and gone and got the information. This is chillingly good, Charles.

Tune into the Chaser Report and stay on top of the news. I think that's a great. We should get some slogans for the Chaser Report. That's a very good idea. Right, maybe five slogans or the Chaser report. Should we do it in the style of something? You can ask it to do in the style. Oh, yeah.

The style of The Onion. Oh, in the style of Hamish and Andy's podcast. In the style of Hamish and Andy's podcast. The Chaser Report, where the news news, Never sleeps. Stay informed, stay entertained with the Chasey Report. That's Hamish and Andy. Yeah.

Get the inside scoop on the day's tops. These aren't very good, are they? No. Okay, what about? Okay, I was going to say, I know what we should do. Get it to write a pitch for the Hamish and Andy podcast, and we'll just do a copy and paste. Why don't we, look, I want to write one more thing.

I've just had this thought. Write the first paragraph of Dominic Knights, next novel and what should it be about what do you want to write your next novel about uh the misery of my existence novel about the misery of his existence okay good luck as i sit here at my desk staring out the window of the dreary grey sky i don't know i can't help but feel the overwhelming sense of misery that has consumed my existence. Every day feels like a struggle, a never-ending cycle of monotony and despair. I trudged through my days, feeling lost and alone. And I felt so seen. Unable to find any joy or meaning in my life. The weight of my own existence feels like a heavy

burden, one that I am constantly struggling to carry. But despite my best efforts, I can't seem to break free from the suffocating grasp of my own despair. that dismal? Charles, that's amazing. Look, I'm completely sold. This is an excellent, excellent thing that was clearly going to change the world. As a final task, can you get it to draft a letter to the writing team of the chaser, telling them that they're all fired? Oh, okay, righty. Draft a letter to the chaser's writing team, informing them that they have been sacked because we're going to replace them with chatbot.

Dear Chaser Writing Team, I regard to inform you that your services are no longer needed. We have decided to replace you with the chatbot that will be able to produce content more efficiently and at the lower cost. This decision was not made. Not made lightly, not made lightly, in that we took the time to put it to a chatbot to generate this insincere bullshit as we sack you during the middle of a horrible recession and inflation-reprice crisis. But we believe it is in the best interest of the company. We understand that this news may be difficult to hear and we want to express our sincere gratitude for the hard work and dedication you've shown during your time of the Chaser. We will be provoked, well, we'll cut this part out.

We will be providing a severance package to assist you during this transition period. Thank you again for your contributions. We wish you the best of luck in your future endeavours, sincerely. I mean, that is better than most rentermsy emails. That's great. We are all doing. But at least we'll have a friendly and sensible bot to tell us in exactly which way we're doing. Our gear is from Road.

We're part of the ACASC creator network. Can you get it to come up with a better sign-off? Oh, yeah. write a, what, a funny sign-off from a podcast. Thanks for tuning in, folks. We'll be back next week with more laughs, more fun, and hopefully fewer instances of us accidentally farting into the microphone. Okay, it wins.

I bowed out before you, chatbot. Until then, stay safe, stay healthy, and as always, stay weird. Fucking hell, does it work for Triple M?