The Chaser Report - Ben Roberts-Smith Has NO REGRETS

Episode Date: June 18, 2023

Will BRS become the new CEO of the RBA? WTF? BRB. TTYL. Lol. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

The Chaser Report is recorded on Gadigal Land. Striving for mediocrity in a world of excellence, this is The Chaser Report. Hello and welcome to The Chaser Report with Dom and Charles. You're back. Dom, great news. What's the news? The news about Ben Robert Smith. Oh, God, well, who's he murdered now?

No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. No, Dom. Look, Charles, the court found that he was lying and that he was plausibly a murderer. Is this Ben Roberts Smith? You don't know. We talked about this. And a war criminal. And a war criminal.

I love how you buried the lead. And also a bad bloke. Yes. And it wasn't clear that he was guilty of domestic violence, but the other stuff was so heinous that they figured it wouldn't have made his reputation any worse. But Dom, Dom, no. See, it's all a bit of a misunderstanding. A misunderstanding? He's arrived back in the country.

He arrived back late last week. Why? He's in Bali. He was in Bali. Shouldn't he have gone to somewhere with fewer extradition treaties? Argentina, perhaps? No. North Korea? And he was asked at the airport, a Channel 9 reporter cornered him. Oh, yeah.

And was asked, is he going to apologise? And this is the great news, Dom, because listen to what he said. We haven't done anything wrong, so we won't be making any apologies. We haven't done anything wrong. He hasn't done anything wrong. We don't have to worry. I suppose his reputation can't get any worse at this point. I mean, it may as well just keep on brazenly denying.

What would be the upside in going, yeah, sorry about the murders. Well, the thing is, like, there is a possibility maybe he misinterpreted that question, right? Oh, you know, we haven't done anything wrong. He was talking about Channel 7 and... Oh, I see. When he ran 7 in Queensland. Yeah. Which is unlikely.

It's unlikely that it went off of that. Maybe he meant Charles that on the floor. flight, he hadn't murdered anybody or committed any war crimes. Just in transit from Bali and Australia. It was like, you know, I'm not going to apologise because I didn't actually murder any staff on the flight. No, I didn't bump anyone on stuff. Because it's worth noting Charles that since we last discussed this fairly juicy topic,

there was a whole other murder that came out during the inquiry into Australian defence forces in Afghanistan. And that wasn't one of the ones that nine had published. Look, it's hard to keep it. track. Like, you know, Nick McKenzie, he did a good job. He's a good journalist. But, you know, I can imagine, like, all these war crimes on your desk, you're going to miss one. Things slip through. Yes. More in a moment. He's not going to apologize. Sure. So then the journalist asked to, I think, sort of almost clarifying, you know, what about all the war crimes you committed,

basically, was the gist of the question. This was his answer. I'm devastated with the result. It's a terrible outcome, and it's the incorrect outcome. Now, so I'm not sure whether he's talking about the court case, or the war crimes. Oh, sure. I suspect the outcome, like he's, what he's talking about

is he's devastated by the fact that he's found out, been found out. So he's not devastated that he shot someone and kicked them off a cliff and all the other stuff. No, no, it's I think it was an imam that was murdered in the new murder that was that came to life. Oh, right, there's an imam. There was an imam. Yeah, that was in the, in the, in the, in the, it's

It's lucky. Inquiry. Lucky that wasn't part of the defamation case because, you know, in Australia, killing an imam is reputational enhancing, isn't it? I imagine it would be in some quarters. Yeah, yeah. Especially around the corridors of Channel 7. But, yeah, so, like, he says it's a terrible outcome, an incorrect outcome, which, you know,

I'm predisposed to trusting what Ben Roberts Smith has said, you know. Sure. Well, he's a decorated soldier, Charles. He's got multiple decorations. Perhaps the point is, though, that actually we've misunderstood the whole thing the whole way. Oh, that seems likely. Yeah, and the whole thing is that the reason why he sued for defamation is because he is proud of the war crimes he committed. Like, he didn't see if there's anything wrong because it's like, well, I just murdered a few people,

committed a few war crimes and lied. You see what I mean? Like, maybe the point is that that's the sort of thing. that in his circles makes him a top bloke. Oh, it's heroic. Yes, exactly. So then the journalist actually asked, you know, are you proud of what you've done? And this was his response.

Are you proud of how you behaved when you served Australia? Of course I. Of course I am. Course I am. So I think that this is, I think what has happened is there's been this massive, you know how in movies, especially in comedies, you know, you can have a whole premise that sort of where one person thinks one thing and the other person thinks another

thing. Oh, misunderstand. It goes back to classic Shakespeare, doesn't it? Yes, exactly. I mean, maybe they thought Ben Robert Smith was like a girl dressed up as a boy in a classic Shakespeare in comedy. Yes, and so there's been a mix-up, which is, he was suing on the basis that, yeah, I committed

all these war crimes and murdered everyone. Yeah, but... But in a good way? In a good way. In a reputational-enhancing way. Yes, that's right. And therefore people saying that I didn't do that or, you know, like I shouldn't have done that is the defamatory part of the whole. Suggesting is anything wrong?

There's anything to be ashamed of. We want with all the murders. So just to clarify the other murder, I've just got the information here. We just, we wouldn't want to miss one out. Wait a minute. Is this the murder that you're talking about a couple of minutes or is this another new one? There might be some more. Look, I can't, I can't say this is the last one.

This is ABC investigations. Breaking murders. So this isn't Channel 9. This is the ABC's come up with this. He directed an SAS comrade to kill an elderly man who was dragged from a monster. in Afghanistan. And the ABC found this out. I only reported it once just as soon as the Channel 9 thing dropped.

Oh, I see. By the way, very brave. They didn't... They didn't want to attract any heat. And it caused a diplomatic incident with the Afghani government. In fact, the Australian government defended the killing of Harjee Raz Muhammad from Sola

in Urishgan province saying that he was an insurgent. The Afghan government, Hamid Karzai, said, no, he was an elderly imam that you've just murdered. I mean, he does seem to like taking out the elderly, doesn't he? I mean, Ben Robert Smith is like the second most well-known killer of old people after COVID. Because I must say, my impression of war heroes was always they go after the hardest person in the pack. Like the Red Baron. Yeah, exactly. The flying ace. Yeah, yeah. Like, you know, sort of strapping young 20-something, you know, killing machines is who you're going after,

not the sort of old farmer who's got one leg. Like, it's sort of. That's true He's got an elderly earma The guy with one leg And another old guy It's my mate Give him a second Victoria Cross

Anyway So the question It now turns He's back in Australia Sure He's resigned from Channel 7 Yeah What does he do next

Well Charles I say that Susan Kiefel The Chief Justice of the High Court Is stepping down I would have thought It'd be fantastic

And why not Serve his country On the bench Wouldn't that pick rate Yeah And look There's lots of elderly people on the high court. That's true actually. He could clear the whole bench.

That's right. Because there's only one judge here today. Ben, what do you think? Because apparently there's also going to be a vacancy in the Senate fairly soon. Oh, yes. That's true. Maybe he could run as a Victorian liberal senator. Well, look, I haven't heard of any allegations, apart from the domestic violence and the thing with the girlfriend on the side. I haven't heard of him like harassing anyone within parliament. It sort of feels like it's probably a fairly good qualification for being in Parliament nowadays. It does seem to happen a lot. It just seems like as soon as there's one allegation,

a whole bunch of other ones come forward. I think we're up to three now, are we? Well, I think the whole thing is that the way it's worked, and I'm not saying it's a good thing, in fact, I'm not saying it's definitely not saying it's a good thing, but the way all that sort of sexual harassment stuff has happened in the past is there's been a code of silence between all the parties, which is like, we won't dobble on you if you don't

dobb on us, sort of a mafia style type thing. And I think what has happened is, I mean, I don't know whether you heard on ABC Radio, there was one Liberal MP who was actually talking about how she and her fellow female staffers don't feel safe walking in the halls of Parliament House at night. Sure. Well, why would you? No. Yes, but it's sort of, it's, she.

shocking that it, anyway, I mean, it's not really funny. We spent the whole week of last week talking about the Brittany Higgins delegations and they tried to say Katie Gallagher knew a few days earlier and it was a giant conspiracy. I must say, Charles, if there was a giant conspiracy, it hasn't achieved very much. It seems to be more devastating for Brittany Higgins than anybody else what's happened. Yes, yes. So, you know, let's watch the information on that one. But it was very classy, I think, of Peter Dutton to bring up Lydia Thorpe's recent nightclub

incident when discussing the matter of one of his own colleagues being accused of sexually harassing her. That was just a classy move, wasn't it? No, he's all class. Yeah. And I think what he said was he wasn't going to discuss them. That's what you do. If you want to remind people about a thing, see, that's what Ben Robert Smith should have done when he got cornered by that Channel 9 journalist at the airport. He should have gone on the attack, not necessarily murdering people, but just like gone on the attack, brought up a whole lot of other things saying that He wasn't going to discuss them. The man with one leg, he could have had lots of issues.

He could have said, one of them being that he only has one leg, presumably. Petit up and said Senator Thorpe has lots of issues. And then her activities, and I'm quoting here, in nightclubs involving alcohol, I don't seek to comment on it. Oh, my God. I don't seek to comment on it. And even 3AW slap that down, Charles. Even 3AW were like, mate, that's...

He should get a job at Channel 7. Channel 7 Queensland manager, actually, I'll tell you what. He's a Queensland. I'd love him. Wouldn't they love him at 7 in Queensland? Yes. He's got as much hair as Koshy did. So maybe a good...

The Dutster. The Dutster. There's some great polling out about Peter Dutton. Oh, yeah. Which is that he is now less popular than Chlamydia? Than Ben Robert Smith. He's as popular as Philip Lowe. Oh, wow.

Did you see, by the way, I saw this on... friend of the show, Senator, Green Senator, Max Chandler Mathes, Twitter. The Reserve Bank, do you know how much they spent on their renovation? Oh, no. They're renovating their offices. Yeah. Take a guess how much.

It's blown up. The budget's blown over. Well, it would be. This is from the Finn Review, by the way. This is from a pro-R-BA source. This should be at least a couple hundred grand. You know, 500. 500.

Half a billion dollars to fix up their offices. Well, 500 million. 500 million dollars. I thought you said, I thought you were meaning $500,000,000. No, 500 million dollars. It's split. I was out by a factor of a thousand. I mean, they're very, you know,

they're sort of broodless officers on Martin Place. They're quite iconic. 500 million. $500 million, yeah, on that. Oh, actually, and I talk to the builder. I bought, talk to the contractor. I live opposite the contractor who's doing that building. How can you afford a place officer?

A guy who's getting $500 million. You, no, I think he's just like a builder on it. But he said the reason why it's so expensive is because the RBA refused to move out of the building. And so they have to keep doing it in stages. And every time, you know, they hold an important meeting, it's everyone's got to down the drills. Well, it's going to be headache.

It was approved the $260 million, which raises questions. And it's bode out to nearly double because that they found asbestos. Oh, yeah. It is, it's a pretty old. Maybe Philip should pull out the espion. Not wanting to wish. That's part of his $900,000 a year pay package. Well, the thing is about the RBA is that, I mean, honestly, what do they do?

besides the meeting. I mean, you can't tell me that's driven by data. You can't tell me that they've got a team of hundreds of analysts going, oh, should you put it up, put it down?

Like, everyone knows what they're going to do. They don't need. All they need is just the board to meet every four weeks, make an annoying, unjustified decision. Everyone tips what they're going to do anyway. They can sack them all. And you know what their submission

to the inquiry about the RBA was that? That they wanted less meetings. He said, because it's your scrutiny. Oh, too many meetings. all the once a month. And just while we're on that,

the fact that they always have one in Melbourne on the day of the Melbourne Cup, fuck them. Fuck them. The Chaser Report, news a few days after it happens. I should note that as I've mentioned before, my grandfather was the governor of the RPA,

but in those days, I'm sure they did a lot of important work. But he didn't get any of this shit that Philip Lowe's got, possibly because he wouldn't have been drawn on whether or interest rates were going to go up or down. But also, like, just fucking, like, if you're going to put up interest rates 12 times, which I'm not saying is good, but if you're going to do that, then maybe just be a little bit

apologetic, not smugly laugh at the plight of people who are doing it hard and telling people who've got share households to get more people in their share households. Like, literally, I don't know what he thinks. He thinks that, you know, people, like, I know people who have started renting out their cupboards, right? Like, I know somebody who lives underneath stairs, Harry Potter style. Do you know a place? Can I?

That's right. I wouldn't mind a spot. But you're going, like, how do you fit more people to share households where there's already a couple? Like what? You want two people in the cupboard? Well, I'm sure that the people who can't afford to live in Sydney would be very happy to have a lovely space in Martin Place right in the heart of the city.

Oh. Which is a bit of asbestos. They're not going to mind. We're going to die young anyway. Because of the crippling cost of health care these days in Australia. But no, but it doesn't have asbestos anymore. They spent $500 million. I love that idea.

Why don't it's like switcheroo? The RBA goes and sets up in a sharehouse. That's what, Philip Lowe. Oh, yes. The RBA whole office should move into. Like, we started the chase of newspaper in the spare room of your house. Yes, exactly. Your share house.

And that's his own advice. He said, oh, look, if you can't afford something, move some more people in. What a good idea. I think the RBA office can be used for affordable housing. Yes. And they can move into my garage. I've got quite a big garage. You've got a big garage.

They're big enough for the, they can chip in towards the rent. But would you be happy with them having a meeting once a month? I mean, that's, it might have to be that at the pub, pretty arduous. We can book the meeting room at the pub around the corner. Yeah, that's the way. Yeah, because there's the whole upstairs. Yeah, yeah. It's fine.

You just buy some drinks. They're definitely buying some drinks. You can't tell me there's a lot of serious deliberation. I'm going to put up. Yeah, fuck it. Well, that's the meeting, isn't it? Another 25 basis points? Yeah, why not?

Yeah, economy's fucked. Yeah. Plus, all the finance journalists think we're going to. Yeah. You may as well. We don't want to make falls out of them. Yep. That's the meaning.

See you guys. See ya. Who's drinks? Should we go to the pub? Oh, we already are. I think that's a much better model for the RPA. Okay. Good.

Well, I'm glad we've solved that. We've solved that. Now, what about Ben Robert Smith? So, Ben Robert Smith is back in the country. Yeah. I don't understand what he thought he'd find here. Well, this is the, the thing. So the journalist asked him

what next? What are you doing? What are you doing next? What's the, are you going to, you know, like, what are you going to do? And this was his reply. There's not much more I can say about it. We'll just have to work through it. And I'll take the advice as it comes. I'll take the advice as it comes. You know what, though. He could make some money contracting.

I mean, he needs money, right? He needs money. He's got skills. Yeah. Assassin. He wouldn't do it subtly. No. And he'd probably other people would be involved. It would only be like for over 65 cripples. Over 65 cripples. Or in arms. The thing that would be complicated, Charles,

is that much of Australia, much of the Commonwealth of Australia in which we live is flat. And he's not good in those countries. He needs cliffs. He needs cliffs. If you are in Sydney, like I can say Watson's Bay or something where there's a nice cliff,

no, he's your man. I think that that's right. Maybe he could knock off half the eastern suburbs. That's another way to address the housing crisis. I mean, honestly, If you live near the gap, be very careful in Sydney. So this is it. We get Ben Robert Smith to solve the housing crisis

by getting him to assassinate all the rich cuns in the eastern suburbs. Living near clips. It turns up at a RBA board meeting. I'd be very worried. I'm off of the board. The other thing is, they're all being replaced. So there's an advisory board that's coming in. It's going to set the interest rates, right?

So the RBA board, they're just going to govern the bank? What does the bank even fucking do? It's all, they're going to look up the admin. Talking about humiliating, sort of, if they're going to be like any other board where it'll be like, okay, oversight. Should we just, you know, yeah. Well, they're not even doing that.

Like, does our old building from the 50s or 60s, whenever it's wrong, have asbestos in it? I don't know. Maybe someone should check in case the cost plays out. Great job, RBA board. If you see it, it's quite a beautiful, our building. It obviously has the bestest, like, there's enough. It is so old that it'd be amazing if anything was in there,

that wasn't made out of asbestos. Can I just ask, though? Yeah. Like, you know how climate change is a real crisis? I've heard this. It's palpably... I haven't said it with my own eyes. Powerably obvious to everyone that it's a crisis.

Yeah. Same with housing. Crisis. Poupably obvious. To some. To some. To some. RBA.

Crisis. Not doing great. Absolute shit house. Shit show. Very obvious. Right. Labor hasn't done anything about anything. Like,

None of those things it's doing anything about. Charles, Charles, Charles, that's very unfair. I think we assume that Philip Lowe's going to go because he's doing a very fucking obviously bad job. But given the track record of Labor so far, I'm thinking he's probably going to be reappointed. No, no. He's the climate crisis of banking.

Charles, I think you're wrong. I'm going to explain why. I think there's a clear candidate to replace Philip Lowe. It's a man who knows. needs a job, whose reputation could not possibly go any lower, who the straight, if we have, if we're going to hate on the RBA government, which is quite a new thing, by the way, I think Philip Lowe is the first one who is universally despised. Yes.

Ben Robert Smith. Yes. He doesn't have to do it. He just have to turn up. No. Just interest rates up. Oh, yeah, whatever. Whatever.

Let's go kill some old cunts. Yeah. It's just to do that. And then no one's going to hate him anymore. He's perfect appointment. Yeah. Perfect. And Philip Lowe, look, I'm just going to say, if he's not going to resign, he might find the trouble

was taken care of. I certainly hope he's not any kind of him arm, because if so, he's fucked. Our goos from Roe, we are part of the O'Connor Class Network. See you next time.