The Chaser Report - Charles Is First To Call The US Election

Episode Date: September 22, 2024

The man who never tires of reminding us that he correctly called Donald Trump’s victory in 2016 through some fluke of chutzpah, Charles Firth, is ready to announce the winner in 2024. Hint – it’s all about the impact of the Republican candidate for governor of North Carolina, Mark “Black Nazi” Robinson. But will he help Kamala Harris or hurt her? Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Striving for mediocrity in a world of excellence, this is The Chaser Report. Hello and welcome to The Chaser Report with Dom and Charles. Hello, Charles. How are you on this fine day? I'm good and I've got a bit of a bold statement to make. Just before you make a bold statement. Your skin is looking better and you'd seem not to have had a migraine. What's happened? Have you found some of that serum of sort of, I don't know, aborted fetuses? No, no, that's just because you haven't seen it.

see me for about a week. But, yeah, I did all the skin treatment. Okay, all right. So you're back. You're a cancer survivor. And then, no, and then the other thing is the migraine stuff. I took this new drug yesterday afternoon. So I got a migraine, and then it cured the migraine after about an hour.

Really? Incredible, yeah. Okay. Definitely don't tell us the name of it or where we can get it. Semantatropran or something. Yeah, there you go to tweet. All right, so Charles's bold statement. You're about to do what you occasionally do, and sometimes even write about it.

You're going to call something. I'm ready to call the US election. After this. Right, okay, those ads were just to give everyone a moment to brace themselves for the truth bomb that's about to go off. We've had two assassination attempts, a change of democratic candidate. This, though, could be the biggest twist of them all anywhere right here. What have you got for us, Charles?

So I believe that Donald Trump will be elected the next. next president of the United States of America. Right. Right. Okay. Wow. And the reason is because there's big news out just at the end of last week in US politics, which involves the governor of North Carolina, right?

Right. So this is not based on some sort of spurious, you know, weird child's theory. Yeah, reckon. Or a vibe? This is hard-nosed electoral college politics and counting, right? Okay. Which is, so North Carolina, absolutely pivotal to state, both for the Democrats and for the Republican. Like, essentially, whoever goes North Carolina, so goes the country, right?

Do you think it's not just a swing state? It's a bellwether. It's a bellwether, swing state, absolutely pivotal, right? And the governor of that fine state of North Carolina is a Republican. He's a black Republican by the name of... Mark Robinson. Mark Robinson. Yeah.

And he on Friday got caught out by CNN who looked at a whole lot of posts dating back to between 2008 and 2012 that Governor Robinson had made on a porn site called Black Africa, is it? No, what's it called? It's called... Just to clarify, he's not governor yet. He's the candidate. He's the lieutenant government, a governor at the moment.

So he's running for the big job. Yes. And it was on a site called Nude Africa. Nude Africa. Porn site called Nude Africa. And so first of all, kudos to this guy for commenting on a porn site. Like, who in the world comments on a porn site? That's not what most people go there for.

In fact, most people don't even have their hands free to type on the keyboard while they're on the porn site. You don't come here for the comments, as it were. But there's a string of comments that he's made. Obviously, it must be a sort of a chat board style. Yeah, I'm just looking at this. Now, they've got to, because as always, I'm fact-checking you in real time. Yes, it's a message board associated with the porn website. A bit like how the Chaser website used to have a message board that was very popular,

the Chaser forum, until it got so toxic that we just shut it down. Yes, that's right. So this Mark Robinson, and one of the, I mean, he's said lots of very electorally interesting things, But one of the quotes is that he believes himself to be a black Nazi, right? Yeah. So you sort of think, like a lot of commentators have been saying, well, that's a terrible idea. Like, that's going to lose Trump the election because, you know, it's a pivotal state. People are going to vote against the Republicans for, you know, this guy calling himself a black Nazi.

Which, let's just be honest. We're students in modern history. Not a thing. In fact, I think demonstrably at the 1936 Olympics with Jesse Owens, it was proven that real Nazis are not big fans of African-American. So this guy, Mark Robinson, slightly confused about the meaning of the term, I suspect. But I think electorally brilliant, right, because let's have a look at the race. So Trump has cornered the Nazi market.

Carmelah has cornered the black side of the electorate. I see where you're going with this. I'm not sure I'm comfortable with it, but I see where you're going with it. But no one has cornered the black Nazis. Right. So you're saying the Venni diagram of Kamala Harris and Donald Trump intersect in Mark Robinson. And it's sort of, it's very similar to the type of politics that Anthony Albanese has been practicing the last two and a half years. Yes, which is he's not quite a lefty anymore.

And he's not quite a Tory, right? Like he's sort of shit at both, right? He's a sort of Tory, like he's a... Isn't the way you're looking for sort of milk toast centrist who everyone despises, isn't that? Yeah, yes, exactly. And that's what this black Nazi guy is. He's sort of, he's created this new sort of centrist.

He's from the centrists of... So I'm just looking at some of these comments that he's made. Can I give you some more comments? Have you seen the full horror of this? Oh, no, well, yeah, no, please film me. This is from CNN reported in The Guardian, right? He referred to himself as a purve in archive messages,

very relatable to many of us because he enjoyed watching transgender pornography. This is on the nude Africa. He also said, and I'm quoting this, two things that he said, first, I'd take Hitler over any of the shit that's in Washington right now talking about the Obama administration.

So he'd rather have Hitler than Barack Obama, the first black president. But then he also wrote, and I'm quoting here, slavery is not bad some people need to be slaves I wish they would bring it back I would certainly buy

a few now I don't even know where to begin was he parodying was he pretending to be a white Nazis kink is being naughty is saying naughty things oh maybe like it's sort of saying taboo things

yeah in that case this is the obvious I mean this is one of the questions that everyone's been asking is if Donald Trump If Donald Trump were to lose, to come on Harris, you said that he won't. No, it's not going to be. Or in four years' time, someone's going to have to take over from Donald Trump. Now, Anthony Scaramucci says that it's going to be, this is from the rest of politics,

U.S., it's going to be Tucker Carlson, which is something to put opinion out of interest. Yeah, yeah. But that could well be a good prediction. But that was before this, because this guy, Mark Robinson, clearly is the success of Trump now. But he's saying edgy taboo breaking stuff. Yes, and the thing is he's sort of cornering a whole lot of constituencies that no one really thought were possible before, like the black Nazis, but also like the sort of, so the Republicans in North Carolina

are famously and pioneeringly anti-trans, right? They were the people who passed the no-unisex toilets in public legislation. It's worth pointing out also that this guy's done this before. Like he's, I won't even say the things he said about gay and trans people, but it's too disgusting to even read out on the podcast. But it's in this Guardian article. But I think the point is that it isn't the point that if you're anti-trans, then you're probably attracted in some way to transgender people in the private, in private, right? Because that's the only reason you'd want to ban it is because it's so, it's so appealing, yeah. Okay.

Can I say one more thing from this article? So it's a very good form of triangulation, in way. Absolutely. And he goes further than Donald Trump in one specific way that is also unprecedented in US politics. Because there's one person in US recent history that you're not allowed to attack Charles, not even Donald Trump,

not even those further to the right than him, the people out there on newsmax and they're really out there. There is one figure in the past, I'm going to say, 70 or 80 years. I would say it's Martin Luther King Jr.: It is Martin Luther King Jr. This guy... They've even got a date. named after him in the...

He's got a day named after him, right? It's like coming out against John Farnham or something in Australia. It's just, you can't do it. He wrote, this guy can. He called him a commie bastard, worse than a maggot, a ho-fucking phony. What? And he also said some things about Martin Luther King that I can't actually...

Let's just say, if I was in the KKK, I would have called him Martin Lucifer, nothing beginning with the K that's really racist. So this guy is saying the things that probably many Americans think. Like, MLK's had a free run for too long. Someone's finally getting stuck into Martin Luther King. And you can see how this will redraw the electoral map across the US. Absolutely.

Because, you know, like you can see how the bean counters in the Democrat Party are going to be very confused about how to even poll. But not just this, Charles, here's something you might not realize, because this is pretty extraordinary. We've described him as the new, the Trumpier Trump, right? The Trumpier Trump, but also African American, completely messes up everyone's sense of triangulation. The Trump campaign, it says here in The Guardian, has asked him to leave the race.

They won't allow him to appear on stage with Trump. Yes. Who, in March, called him Martin Luther King on steroids by the. the way, which I presume this Robinson guy, found really offensive. Wow, okay. So Donald Trump's winning the election. I think so, because I think the thing is, if you think about it, you know, if you're in the US, you'd be so confused by someone like Mark Robinson on the ballot that you'd probably end up voting for the opposite of what you thought you should be voting for or whatever. Like, it's just such a sort of chaotic

spread of genius brilliance into the thing that anyone who's voting for Carmelah and goes, oh, but I should support black people, goes, oh, well, hang on, we've got this black Nazi here. I mean, they can't vote for him yet. Unless they're in North Carolina, where he'll presumably win now. Yeah, oh, yeah, yeah, hands down.

So this guy's the favourite, because I don't know about you, Charles. And as goes North Carolina, so goes to the country, yeah. I mean, I must say Trump's been starting to seem a bit predictable. Hasn't he? I mean, Trump, we've seen the show before. Do you think maybe Mark Robinson should be a late swap out with Trump in this election? That is an extraordinary suggestion. Let's ponder that after this.

The Chaser Report, less news, more often. So one of Kamala Harris's more effective lines against Donald Trump has been same old playboy, right? Same old, same old. Everyone knows, let's do something new. We know this guy. And one of the strange things about the nomination of Trump is that, you know, He lost in 2020, he effectively lost in 2022. He even lost in 2018 in the midterms, effectively.

Trump has not actually won something since 2016. Well, it depends how you to find a win. Yeah. If you're Donald Trump, you've never lost anything, including in 2020 election. I was reminded the other day that when, you know, when Trump was ahead in some of those ballots in like Georgia and Ohio during the 2020 count, the Republicans came out with the stop the count. Remember the stop the count? Well, this was the whole point, Charles, is that... Can I remind everyone that the stupidity of the situation?

So he was ahead after the first night. Yes. And he's like, we've won the election, it's all over, I'm back. But everyone was going, but hang on, you haven't voted for a whole of a... It was the postal votes. The postal votes, which are all going to be democratic leading. Vast numbers of postal votes. And so he viewed all those postal votes as frauds, as fake and as scams.

Because they changed the result. They changed the result. Yes. But do you know why they changed the result? Do you remember what it was? Oh, no, I don't remember. It's actually hilarious. The main binary in the US election,

which it did correspond roughly to Democrat and Republican, but it wasn't necessarily left versus right. It was, are you willing to go out in public in the middle of a pandemic and vote on election day? Oh, that's right. Or are you going to do it via postal vote so you don't get fucking COVID?

So, of course, all the postal ballots favored the Democrats because those were the ones, those are the people who actually believed COVID was, real and didn't want to get it. Whereas in Florida, all the nutbags who didn't die of COVID because many of the millions did. Millions of, actually, this is one reason Kamala Harris might win to contradict you is a lot of Republicans have died because of COVID. Yes. Yes. So we'll see what the numbers. Which is in itself a conspiracy. It is. Well, Mark Robinson has said. It shows you why the Democrats invented COVID in the first place to kill Republicans.

Mark Robinson has said exactly that. He said. He's described, he did. He did. I've got it here in front of me. He has described COVID-19 as a, and I quote, globalist conspiracy to destroy Donald Trump. But did he say that on a porn site? Was that just part of his kink? Let's see where he said. I can't see the link's broken.

But, yeah, it's probably because it goes to nudeafrica.com. So there you go. So the whole of US politics is about to be changed. Charles is called not only... Okay, so hang on. You've got to choose. Are you calling the election for Donald Trump? Or are you calling it for Mark Robinson

swapping in in a month's time? Like Kamala Harris stuff? I think there are logistical problems with swapping in a new candidate so late. I think a more realistic scenario is J.D. Vance becomes... The presidential candidate. The presidential candidate. And Mark Robinson comes in behind... He could as the VP.

Yeah, that could work. As J.D. Vance's slave, quote, unquote. Right. Okay. No, the better option, I think... Like with the dog leash. I think the other way around. I think what they need to do, because you can write anyone into the ballot.

They can write in Mark Robinson's name. Oh, really? Oh, okay. Leave J.D. Vance. And J.D. Vance could be the one in the collar. I think that would actually do him some good. Oh, okay. Yes. I don't want to kink shame J.D. Vance, but frankly, nothing would surprise him.

We've already talked about him in couches, right? Yeah. This wouldn't be... This would be a couch-adjacent incident. Wouldn't it? Yeah. So, wow. Okay, so the whole of the U.S. election is turned on its head. Watch Mark Robinson's career from here because anything could happen.

Yes. I mean, look, the other scenario just taking it to a different place is that this tips the very close race in North Carolina into the Democrats' hands. And then the nation suddenly ends up voting for Kamala. But I think that's too boring a scenario. Look, that's quite possible. And she's certainly ahead in the polls. But the polls are much tighter than anyone might think in Australia. We might get some of our US experts back next week to talk about that.

But here's the thing, Charles. But I think you win. How does it closer? How do you get the black Nazi party? Charles. Like, how does that work? Like, how possibly? I mean, it's like saying that we'd have a ridiculous drunk who ends up sprawled in gutters

on the curb as our deputy prime minister for you. years or something like that would never happen in Australia. Not yet but the 325 election I think is every chance. But Charles I think you're going to win this one either way. This is going to be one of these episodes we play back in the future because okay, counterfactual

Kamala Harris wins the next election. Yeah, well it's stolen. Donald Trump steals the next election. She steals the next election for Donald Trump, of course. After four years of Kamala Harris, what are Americans going to want? They're going to want Mark Robinson. They're going to

A black Nazi. Yes. So either way. Yes, because... He's inevitable. Because essentially, America's then been through all the normal diversities, isn't it? It'll have had a woman. It'll have had a couple of black people.

Yeah. It'll have had an Indian person. They need a black Nazis next off the top of the diversity thing. I think, to be fair, objectively speaking, it is far more progressive to elect a black Nazi than a white Nazi. And I think the American voters in the swing states who decide these things. Yes, that's right.

The California vote. They won't want to elect a white Nazi. That's all. You want a DEI Nazi. Yeah. What? Oh, Charles. Let's stop this here.

But nevertheless, Mark Robinson, his career is worth watching. Either watch his progression on the news or apparently just go to your favorite porn site's message board and you'll find him there too. Our gear is from Road. We're part of the iconic class network, and almost cancelled. We'll be back again tomorrow.

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