The Chaser Report - Chaser Report Extra - 17th June 2020

Episode Date: June 16, 2020

The latest Chaser headlines from Rebecca De Unamuno. Anthony Albanese vows to wipe out branchstackers, presumably including himself. The Liberal Party facing cancellation due to racist characters. Prince Andrew's statue fast-tracked. Plus Dom Knight runs Charles Firth and Andrew Hansen through a list of new world records that really don't deserve to be in the record books. 
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The Chaser Report, Global World International News Headlines Update with Rebecca Deunamuno. There have been mounting calls for the Liberal Party to be removed from television due to a preponderance of racist characters. A review has found many cast members of the Liberal Party had written and performed scripts that contained hate speech against migrant groups, indigenous Australians, refugees, Muslims, gays, lesbians and transgender. to people. The review also found troubling material in many of the Liberal Party's comedy spin-off shows, including the National Party and Pauline Hanson's One Nation. A statue of Prince Andrew has been fast-tracked and will be erected outside Buckingham Palace later this week. A spokesperson said they made the decision after they noticed that statues

depicting vile people who did terrible things in the past seem to be all the rage at the moment. Anthony Albanese says dodgy branch stackers who come to power by breaking the Labor Party's rules have no place in the party. Mr Albanese is expected to announce his resignation later today. Remember to subscribe to this podcast in your podcast app of choice and check out chaser.com dot-com.com for all the latest headlines. Now it's time for Dom to run Charles and Andrew through the world's stupidest world records. Thank you, Beck, and it's time to catch up on some of the greatest achievements of humanity in the past couple of weeks. My name is Domnott, Andrew Hanson and Charles Firth here as we look at World Records.

no one else bothered to attempt. And guys, I mean, while we've all been in lockdown, the process of pushing out humanity's achievement, reaching for the stars with new world records, has not stopped. One little bit, you'll be glad to know, and I'm here to celebrate some wonderful achievements. A man in Idaho managed to down an entire litre of lime juice in just 17.29 seconds. An extraordinary achievement. And an extraordinary waste of limes. Oh, why did he choose lime juice?

I mean, aren't there better juices? He'd already broken the record for lemon juice the week earlier. Is it a? Oh, gosh, he didn't. This man's pathetic. He's going to get Lyme disease, you can tell. No, it was just a picture of lime juice. I saw the photo, and I want to introduce you to the hero of this week's World Record Roundup.

It's a man called David Rush. He is on a mission to break as many world records. as possible to promote STEM education, you know, science, technology, engineering, and maths. And so he's decided to do that with world records. This is number 150. The lemon juice was 149. And isn't it doing a great thing for promoting education in science? Don't you want to all go and get science degrees?

Well, it is. It is because it's scientifically proven that this goes on nitwit. Don't you think that, I mean, Guinness Book of World Records did not have the greatest reputation before this guy came along and now they're just sort of letting him just set pissy world record like don't they have any sort of pride in in what they're doing excuse me the week before he started on the juice he set a record with his wife by dressing up in 32 t-shirts in one minute that's a record that's just how my wife gets dressed She puts on about

32 different outfits. Oh, she should apply. The couple also have a lot of other records, including speed juggling and the fastest time to wrap a person in cling wrap. I mean, this is extraordinary. Why are these people not nationally? No, but the world records are supposed to be skill-based.

And these are, this is a scam, because they're not skill-based. Like, anyone can be wrapped up in cling-wrap. But that is not a record. That's just a piece of fucking shabreve. shit. 32 t-shirts on in one minute, Charles Feth. You can barely put one on.

I've seen you. I reckon this is, like, this is just the Guinness World Record for being shit. Like, this is just shit. It's just the Guinness shit records. That'd be his 151st record. That'll advance the cause of STEM education. If you can add that to his gongs. How do you raise money doing a world record?

How does drinking lime juice fast raise money for, stem. It doesn't even fucking raise money. It raises awareness. Awareness of word. Awareness that your mic's distorting. But look, let's go to Turkey. Someone completely different. A Turkish artist,

you'll love this one, Charles. I promise. I promise. Turkish artist by the name of Nikati Kokmars made the smallest ever chess set on a board measuring 0.35 inches by 0.35 inches. It took him six months of working for 6 hours a day to make it.

The only problem is you would need a microscope to see the board and you'd have to use special sticks to move the tiny pieces. I mean, that is amazing, a tiny chess set. Come on. Absolutely crap. This chess board should be swilled down like a little tablet by the lime juice guy in his litre of lime juice and then just pissed away so that it can be forgotten forever. Speaking of swilling things down, do you like pasta?

Maybe this will cheer you up, Charles. visitors to a food-based theme park in Italy have made the largest sheet of handmade pasta made by non-professionals. It's 262 feet long. What's this made by non-professionals, Domney? Well, they all turned up to help. Come on.

What's the record for pasta made by just people? I mean, what? Is there going to be a new record next week for pasta made by people under the height of 160 centimetres? Is it going to... Okay, we can do better. Nitters in the United Kingdom. Terrible.

Submitted 79,001 yarn flags to produce the world's largest knitted bunting. 79,000 flags. I stretched for 8.9 miles. Previous record was a pissy 31,000 flags. What an extraordinary accomplishment. Admittedly, people have time in lockdown. If the previous record was 31,000,

why did they bother stopping, you know, not going past 31,001? I mean, why did they go to 7,000? 79,000? Are these people idiot? Is one of these people a lime juice guy? Is that why they're so thick? Because why would you break a record, Andrew, when you can smash it? And let's finish now with someone who's really spent many years doing something truly extraordinary. Let's go to Japan. We're a woman by the name of Hamako Mori, age 90, has been playing video games for 40 years. She's known as the gaming grandma, and she's won the record for the oldest gaming YouTuber. She has 150,000 YouTube subscribers, more than the chaser, I suspect. And her favourite game at the moment, I'm not making this up, Grand Theft Auto 5.

I change my mind about this. I mean, this is pretty good. Although you have to remember that in Japan, they invented video games in about 1836. So there's nothing special, really, about an old person there playing video games. Look, I know you guys have hung a lot of shit on these extraordinary achievements, but you've got to agree with me. It's a lot better than the people who got the order of Australia. The Chaser Report, news a few days after it happens.

And sadly, that is the end of the amazing world records for this week, more sometime in the future. These mini episodes come out twice a week. The full episodes every Friday, of course, thanks to Mike LaBralia, producer, for pulling them all together. Around the clock, though, you can check stories at the Chaser website, chaser.com. You can check all of us social.

on Instagram and TikTok, whatever that is, and all these other things that Charles puts together, Facebook, of course. And don't forget to subscribe to the podcast to get every episode as it comes out. Leave us a review if you'd be so kind or unkind. It's really up to you. And we'll catch you next time here on The Chaser Report.