The Chaser Report - From A Protest To The Logies

Episode Date: August 4, 2025

This very special episode of The Chaser Report was recorded live at the Logies, immediately after Charles found out he lost because you didn't vote enough for him. Plus, Charles recounts the genuinely fascinating story of how he got from a protest to the Logies.--Buy the Wankernomics book: https://wankernomics.com/bookListen AD FREE: https://thechaserreport.supercast.com/ Follow us on Instagram: @chaserwarSpam Dom's socials: @dom_knightSend Charles voicemails: @charlesfirthEmail us: [e-mail] CEO’s Super-yacht upgrade Fund: https://chaser.com.au/support/ Send complaints to: [e-mail] Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

The Chaser Report is recorded on Gatigal Land. Striving for mediocrity in a world of excellence, this is The Chaser Report. Hello and welcome to The Chase Report with Dom and Charles. Hello, Charles. You're joining us live from the Logies, the Daniel TV Week, Logie Awards. Charles, I haven't actually, I have to confess, really been following what's been going on. Any results you want to tell me about? Well, we just lost.

Optics? Oh, I'm genuinely sorry, that's rubbish, that is... I feel like you know that because you were watching and then you know that I'm very sad. No, I'm not, I'm actually, I actually wasn't watching.

I was wrangling my children. It's about 10.30pm and my children still are asleep. So look, I mean, look, back in the day, I used to go to the loggies. It's reeds. It's, it's, it's, it's, right, look, the judges are always wrong, and they've never been more wrong than the times

we actually won, if I'm going to be really honest. Can I be really self-indulgent tonight? Yeah. Tell you a little bit about my day. We're all here for you, Charles. We, look, with the listeners, we all want to give you a bit of a hug that is almost as big as the hug we would give to Kitty Flanagan, were she here? And, because you go, it's actually, it's actually fair.

And, like, all the, like, I just sort of feel like, because Magda's a band's. we're all quiet, like the whole thing is fair enough. Yeah, and you're tired and emotional in that Carl Stephanovic way and we can hear that and that's a beautiful thing. But the good thing is I've already been offered drugs once tonight. So I feel like my night is only going to get better. Oh, it's early in the, in the like, look at the very end of the call, Charles, after yourself indulgence, I'll tell you why optics deserve to win, all right?

Yeah, okay. From a neutral perspective. But let me just be a little bit self-in-old and tell you about my day. Because my day is hilarious, right? So before the Logies, I decided to go to the, you know, war of, you know, like the peace march. The bridge, yeah, you marched across the bridge. I saw that.

I marched against the, across the bridge, right? In the rain. So I was thinking, in the rain with my kids. And I was thinking, like, I think I can do this. I think I can. because we had to get to the... Oh, the logistics were complicated. The logistics were very complicated

because the March stupidly went from the city to North Sydney. Oh, the wrong direction for the Logies. They weren't thinking about Logi nominees who might have wanted to attend. Yeah, no. That's extraordinary. What were the protests? The Coalition for Palestine weren't thinking about you. So, and the thing is that the March started at like, well,

It started at 1pm, but I had a friend who had a 50th. Anyway, point is, like, I had to, where do you put your tuxedo when you're marching against Genocide? You wear it. No, and then I said to my wife, well, I think I'm just going to wear my tuxedo to the protest rally. Because it was in pouring rain. It was. We would have been absolutely drenched. And she went, no, you'll be wet and you'll be smelly.

You've got to realize we're marching across the harbour bridge. You'll be sweaty. Anyway, so what happened was I dropped my tuxedo off at our, the chaser office, right? Which is right near the ABC, right? And then we went and did the march, right, which was all great. And, you know, I'm pretty sure genocide is now solved, right? Had they called off the genocide or? Not as yet, but the time difference means that the newsmen are entirely filtered through.

yet. I'm not sure. Because I'm sure if they see people marching across the bridge, they'll go, okay, well, maybe we shouldn't. I think that was the idea. They need to be, you know, if I, it's just to use the words, the optics. It was what the, it really was an optics march. Don't say optics tonight, Dom.

This is too. Is it too, too raw? It's too raw. Okay, okay. So I dropped my tuxedo off, then go to see the march, right? And so we're marching cross. And then we get to, like, and it's like, to be, clear it's very slow like you got a hundred thousand people yeah particularly when the police

directs many of them in a u-turn to go back the other way oh no no so this is what happened so we were so i went oh well let's go to the front of the march and then i'll be easily able to leave and just like catch a train home yeah yeah and get ready for logies but instead what happened was we get to the you know milson's point and they say you've got to turn back on the you just got to turn around and march back and I don't know whether like this may be only relevance to Sydney people but as you're coming off the bridge into North Sydney it's it's surrounded by concrete walls right like the actual road is is concrete and so the police were there going we've cancelled the march you've got to turn around and panic went through and

I was there with my kids, panic went through the entire crowd because they were going, but we had a sea of humanity coming into us. This was the worry to be really serious. It was really serious. It was really serious and it was really panicking. I can't tell you, there was rising panic in the entire crowd. Well, this is the thing about the bridge, Charles, is that there's metal sides and train lines and stuff. There's no way, if there's turning people on the bridge.

There's no way out. You can't move sideways. That's why it's got quite scary. It was very scary. I can tell you. And we were at the front of the crowd where they, and they kept sending us this text message saying you got to turn around. And you're going back into where there are more people coming towards you.

This is the thing that's not scary on the cameras as I was watching it. Yes. It was horrible. And they were standing there and there was a free road up to North City. So the other thing they did is they closed. was North Sydney Station. So there was no way out. They were going, and also you can't actually,

there was just too many protesters, right? Well, but this is the thing that's clear is that there are a lot more people than they thought because turning people around, the problem was there were still more people trying to come. I mean, we don't even know how many people would have come. I don't even know if people got turned away at the other end, like the numbers might even have been bigger. Oh, I think, I think, look, I mean, people were saying it's actually, it was more like quarter of a million people.

It was just, it was ridiculous. There was just so many people. I love that you're at the Logies talking about a march. That's, that's the most on-brand thing for you, Charles, in the history of the world. But, but can I just tell you? So, anyway, point is, I eventually managed to, so the police allowed us to sort of get out this side alley. There was a huge road, the Pacific Highway. They'd blocked off the Pacific Highway.

It was completely empty. And they went, no, no, no, you've got to go out the side street. which was all under construction and stuff like that. Lavender Avenue or something. And it was like, so we were literally, it took half an hour to move 20 metres to get out of the Harbor Bridge. Like, it was just the worst traffic manager in the world. But then, I mean, how the fuck do I get back to the Logies in time, right?

So this was like 3.30. I had to get my tax on and then get to the Logies by five, lockdown at five, right? so I catch a hello bike back into the city that hello bikes don't work in North Sydney so I had like the brakes were on until I got onto the city side Are you serious?

You're riding a bike over the bridge with the brakes on to get to the loggis is the least glamorous way You're kind of stealing a bike in a sense It was a few to get to the wagons I went up to the police who were guarding the bike lane back over the hover rich and i said do you think that you like is the bike lane open and they went yeah yeah it's open

and then i stole a hello bike yeah i literally stole the hello bike and one of the cops went that's a really good idea but i literally so you like that copps i worked up this sweats so i arrived then at the ABC going oh i'm ready i'm going on the thing and they said you are in no space and to go under the red carpet and they took me into costume and gave me a sweat rag which is now at the Logies to mop up all my sweat

from riding across the Harbour Bridge and yeah, anyway so I've got the most ridiculous day The Chaser Report news you can't trust I mean I think the other thing is I'm just for season two of optics

Well, this is the thing that my character in optics always rides a bike everywhere. Like, the one thing that the ABC wouldn't fund was a shot of me riding across the Harbour Bridge. Seriously. Yes, because they went, oh, it's too expensive. Oh, my gosh. And that's what we've filmed it. And we've, like, we should have filmed it. The news chopper's probably got some cutaways of you.

Stealing a bike. Yeah, because the police, because the other thing that I didn't know is the police, because of the way we knew that the protest had been sort of. cancelled was the police helicopters in the sky over the harbour bridge had these p as and i mean this is an announcement you have to turn around and they put on the the police tyrant from above yes it was extraordinary it was like it was like sort of dystopian police state you know i don't know it was like some sort of horror movie but it was australia 2020 going you must must not protest against genocide.

It was extraordinary. Anyway. What? And now it must be completely surreal being at the Logies. I imagine Carl Stefanovic didn't have quite the same day heading to the Lockeys as you. I don't know, but I'll tell you what, I saw Carl on the Red Carvers, and he is very good looking. Like, he is, I mean, I sort of think he deserves not to have. bad at that as me.

Oh, look, you go and have a drink with him, Charles. I'm sure he'll be up for it. I will. And yet, like, it's, it's, it's all good. Like, it's very white, not as, not nearly is, it's a lot more white than the protest was, so. I can believe that. Well, Charles, look, optics, unlike, I mean, Fisk was admittedly, extremely funny piece, but, you know, it was a character comedy about a, a misanthropic lawyer, et cetera,

surrounded by a bunch of other misanthropes. Whereas you actually had more to say in optics. You had to say that airlines sucked and PR sucked and everyone else sucked and professional sports people sucked. And I don't know, I just think you should be happy with what you, but in all sincerity, you should be happy with what you achieved. It may not have been in the view of experts quite as funny as Fisk, but it was a landmark TV series for taking the piss out of a PR industry. and be yourself. And Fisk didn't take the piss out of you nearly as well, as obviously. But with that, I agree.

And that's very nice of you, Don. That's very nice. Because it is sad to look. Like, even though it's all rubbish. It is. Oh, look, we lost many Logies. I remember what it's like. You're kind of going, I reject this entire system.

It's outrageous, but I still think it should have recognised. I still want to win it. Yeah. Well, well, we'll always have CNN and N. No, we'll always have seen it in it. All right, enjoy the rest of your life. Yeah, sorry, enjoy the rest of your night, Charles. Yes, yes.

And we'll catch you on the other side. Give our regards to Carl. I will. I'll go and tell him he's very good looking. We're part of the Icona class network. And we feature the only co-presenter to arrive at the Logies on a stolen bike.