The Chaser Report - From Rags To Slightly Nicer Rags

Episode Date: August 7, 2025

Charles is disappearing off to Edinburgh, and Dom points out the carbon impact of his billionaire-esque flight habits. Also, we get our admin on and read reviews, then make an announcement about our uploading consistency over the next month. Plus, Charles has a new audiobook he's listening to.---Buy the Wankernomics book: https://wankernomics.com/bookListen AD FREE: https://thechaserreport.supercast.com/ Follow us on Instagram: @chaserwarSpam Dom's socials: @dom_knightSend Charles voicemails: @charlesfirthEmail us: [e-mail] CEO’s Super-yacht upgrade Fund: https://chaser.com.au/support/ Send complaints to: [e-mail] Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

The Chaser Report is recorded on Gadigal Land. Striving for mediocrity in a world of excellence, this is The Chaser Report. Hello and welcome to the Friday edition of The Chaser Report with John and Charles. Now, Charles, this is quite a significant Friday for you, isn't it? Yes. It's yet another success. God, you've become boringly successful. I preferred you, Charles, when you were a hapless visionary whose visions after the

establishment of the Chaser, which to be fed at one point, went quite well. They tended to not always come out, but now it seems like you're hitting, hitting gold. Do you think maybe it's affecting our relationship with the listeners, the fact that, you know, they have to listen to this person who's just so achingly successful that I'm sort of disconnected from just the schlubs who listen? I don't think so at all, because I suspect anyone listening to this podcast has had a reasonably

successful career on an ongoing basis. They haven't had sort of a brief early flash in the pan in 30 years of pushing shit up here. Two decades of. Oh, two decades. Okay. I was going three. Sure, two decades. Two decades.

I feel like there was a few things in there that weren't too bad. Oh, there were some highlights along there. Yeah, yeah. I can't what they are. I can't remember me either. Yeah, but no, so let's talk about what you're going to do, but then also there's an impact on the podcast, which we need to discuss. And we'll take some listener questions, I think.

Sure. Sure. I don't know where you get them from, but I know people tell. text you all the time. Yeah. There's also some listening reviews here. So there's a little bit of an admini episode, which we'll kick off after these ads. Which, by the way, Charles, quite a lot of people are paying not to get the ads and to get

the weekend editions. Yes. And that's an announcement that we've got to make is we're going to put up the price for all that stuff. Yes. Yes. We have to put them. I don't remember what we agreed to put them up to.

Well, I already signed off with Arian on the price. points. There are a hundred ideas. But the point is, the prices are going to go up any day now. So if you do want to subscribe before the prices go up, you should do it right now. Except, well, won't their prices go up next month or something? Well, I think the whole point is, no, no, no, no. We're going to... Are you going to grandfather the old? Oh, that's very good. Okay. Well, that's a, that's a big announcement. But it's ridiculously cheap at the moment. It is too cheap. We said, we said it's going to be a price of a coffee. And it was the price of a coffee 10 years ago.

It was a $4 a month, I think, yeah. It's $3 a month for ad free, $4 a month, including the bonus episode. That's stupid. It should be like $100 a month. There was a ridiculously overpriced tier at one point. I don't know if we're keeping that. No, we're not. Okay, so it's going up to, do you remember what the figures are?

Yeah, so I think we're saying $5.99 a month for ad free and the bonus episode each weekend. That's pretty good. And then I think it's something like $9.99 a month. And for that, you get, what would you get... Is it the Chaser website as well? You get the Chaser website with the $599. Oh, okay, yeah. I think maybe it's $9.99 and you get the annual.

Oh, do you? Yeah, that's not bad. Or maybe that's 12. Anyway. Yeah, anyway. So it's clearly been very thoroughly worked out and agreed to. But the other thing is you can get annual subscriptions, which means you don't have to think about it.

But also it means you can give it to somebody. Because giving somebody a monthly subscription is a bit shitty, isn't it? Yeah, yeah. It just signs them up. Oh, that's the place That's going to get you for your 50th. Yeah. But if you can, so I think, you know, this is, hit it hot.

But so if people join today, they're locking the lower price. Is that right? They lock in the lower price just on the, on the, like, if you get the, if you want to get the annual and all that sort of stuff, you still actually have to, um, you'll have to pay more. That's a pretty decent offer. But the entry in the bonus episode, yeah, you can lock it in for four dollars. Although, ideally you wouldn't, you wait until we get around to doing it.

Wait until it's more expensive. And then we'll get more money. That's good. That's a really good idea. Okay, so on Friday, you are getting on a plane. Getting on a plane to sunny Edinburgh. Edinburgh. Yes, where it's rainy.

It's basically the same weather during summer as it is during winter here. Yeah, yeah. Oh, that festival thing's on, isn't it? Yeah, French Festival. Edinburgh, the Fringe, yeah. That's apparently got some of the world's top comedy at it, I've always. I'd never been to it. Yeah.

They say that some of the world's top performers do the fringe. Yeah, pretty much. Why, see, aren't you also doing the fringe? Yay! Hey! That's the kind of joke you'll hear in Edinburgh this month. Way! But, no, we've got a huge venue this year.

It's called the Pleasance Grand. It's one of the biggest venues in the whole festival. So I told you it was becoming insufferable. And let's just say, first week, ticket selling fast. We've already sold out three shows. We'll sell out the rest of the week pretty soon. So if you are in Edinburgh and listening to this, which is very unlikely, better hurry.

The good news, though, is that if you are a subscriber to the podcast, Charles will give you a free ticket. Won't you, Charles? You have to text him. Sure, yeah. Yeah, definitely put you on the... Actually, I did that last year. I caught up with somebody who was living in, like, Norway or Finland or something.

And he came across and he said, oh, can I have a ticket to your show? And I did. And then I went out for a beer with him afterwards. It was really nice hearing from an Australian. That is actually really lovely that despite your success, just a little. little bit desperate. That's really good. No, no, I'm just, I've got the common touch, Dom.

Oh, my God. But look, I've got a question here from a listener. And the question is, what audio book are you reading at the moment? Oh, God. Or listening to it at the moment. And thank you for asking that question. What's the listener's name, Charles? Bals.

His name's Bals. Very good. And it's interesting that you should ask that question, Bales. It was very opportune because the Wankanomics audio book came out just came out today. So then I've been listening to that all. And it's, you know what they did? They got the authors to actually record the audiobook. So does James have to put up with this as well, James Schleffle.

Let's see if it's for free on Spotify. Yeah, it is. It is. Yeah. If you've got premium Spotify, you can get it on, um, although I think that maybe you can't search for it because I tried to search for it. Because I tried to search for it, couldn't find it. I think it's because...

Oh, this looks good. Freeconomics. A rogue economist explores. No. No, no, wankanomics. No, it's because it's W asterisk. Maybe just search for Charles. No, it's, it is, in all honesty.

It's a real problem. W. Asterisk. Yeah. Inconomics to find it. Yeah. Let's see. This is, oh my God. How?

Three hours and 19 minutes. It's almost insufferable. It's this podcast. Uh, I'll just give him a hit. There you go. So there's one list. Do you like the corporate music? You know that's not good.

You realize that's terrible music. That's James. He's quite good, isn't he? He's good. Oh no, that guy's not as good. All right, that's enough. Hey, do you like that? So, yeah, it's pretty good.

So, anyway, we should probably go for some more listener questions. No one is listening to this podcast anymore. Either because they've gone off to listen to the Wankonomics audio book or more likely because they're done. So what we've also decided is that we're going to pull back the frequency of this podcast just for the next few weeks. Yes. Well, more like a month, really, isn't it?

You're away. How long are you away for? Well, I'm away until the end of August. Yeah, okay. Then when I get back, I'm only here for a few weeks, and that includes my 50th birthday, sorry, 40th birthday. Sorry, I don't want the listeners to get confused there. Yeah.

So 40th birthday. The invitation actually says, Charles's 40th birthday. He's back the game. I've demanded 40 candles on the cake as well. He's so old that 40th is like an underbeard. It's really embarrassing. And then...

So you're just coming back for your 40th. That's basically what you're coming back for. Yeah, and then we head out again, and we've got essentially the whole of October in the UK as well. So, yeah, so basically we had a lot of discussions about what to do, and some of you, the more committed slash idiotic listeners may have listened to that conversation a few days ago. Look, and so it's become evident that the only sensible thing to do is to try and catch up basically once per week. So Charles and I will catch up once per week. We'll record a couple of episodes because we don't normally do them back to back.

We normally do them just about every day. Oh, absolutely. Of course. At 4 a.m., that's right. But we'll do one session between the UK and Australia. And we will do, here's the thing. We will commit to doing the weekend, the one that you have to pay for. So if you're paying, good on you.

And they've become really. enjoy, but I must say genuinely enjoy those ones. And a bit more... And the one that we did for tomorrow is good, because I wouldn't talk about that idea on the main... I wouldn't advise you to talk about that idea on the main podcast. No, it's really

for... I think that if you... If you pay for a membership, I think that constitutes a contract. Oh, it does, yes. Not to tell anyone about anything that Charles might say that would get him cancelled. I do think... Particularly on the big, successful international tour. As we're doing,

the whole terms of service we should write in there something about if you subscribe Oh definitely have you not done that or hearing

let's just say look the word sedition is bandied about criminal treason anyway that's for paying subscribers to run so what that means

in real terms is there'll probably be two new episodes a week over this month so less often but you know and there's always the possibility of jumping on

for an emergency edition if anything well yeah I mean for example if a certain comedy show just really explodes in Edinburgh, then that would constitute an emergency podcast situation.

It would be a disaster. Yes, that's true. So we'll be here, you know, if, I don't know, something major happens, if our bow announces a very fast train, for instance, I think we'll definitely jump out of the mics and do a special episode. But that's the plan because Charles has a lot to do. The announcement, I think, it's a sort of daily occurrence, isn't it? If it actually exists.

Anything that makes us think it will happen. So you'll see us on the feed, but a bit less often, it's not an error. Look, I may also do one or two extras with a few other people, producer Loughlin perhaps, or John Delmenico or Dave Smith or some of the other friends at the show, but I'm not committing to keeping it daily. It's just a bit tough. Without Charles handy to record with, that's why we can keep, we can basically keep it going daily because we see each other a lot.

The Chaser Report, news you can't trust. I've got another listener feedback here. Oh, really? Another listener question, yeah, okay. This one might even be a little bit more real than the other ones. Sure. Which is that apparently all the aquifers around the world are drying up or at least becoming so salty that they become unusable. What has this got to do with anything?

So, well, I just thought, you know, the listeners need some happy, funny facts. Right. And a listener sort of texted in. In the future, yeah, yeah. But it's, my God, it's the most... You do know, J.T, that it's supposed to be like an amusing tech podcast about Bluetooth devices, not about the fact that everyone's going to die first. Yeah, that's off-brand.

We do come up with... At least it was Acilla ants when we were coming up in... Oh, that was good. Yeah, exactly, yeah, yeah. So, yeah, the eventual kind of... Because that's already happening. Salonation of everything. The salination, that's because my dad...

My dad went to Tvalu a few years ago. Yeah. And already it's happening there. So it was for some climate change conference, ironically. That is ironic. And the water table on, I think it might be two islands or something like that, but the water table, and it's quite near the airport, has, like, is now below sea level. And so therefore, all the trees are dying because there's no water in the water. Like, it's salt water.

Are you worried about climate change, Charles? In all sincerity. Well, yes, because it's going to really make me feel guilty every time I jet around the world. This is my point. You're going to the UK, touring a bit, and coming back for your own birthday party, then flying back again. That is kind of Bezos-esque. It's not something Greta Thunberg would approve of. Well, she'd do it by boat.

Yeah, I know. Insufferably. Yeah. And she'd set out for her 21st birthday and she'd get there by her 50th. How dare you? Okay. Yeah, no, I hope you're going to offset those flats, aren't you? Aren't you?

Yeah, sure. Can you? Like, isn't offsetting rubbish? Although, actually, I found out from Craig, I was talking, because I thought all the offsetting stuff is rubbish. Apparently, it isn't, because my mum got her, like, she's got a farm, and she got native forest planted on it. And the way she could afford it.

that was the firm went, oh, well, we own the right, your carbon rights to this native forest. I've interviewed, not about that. For like 99 years. It's called carbon farming. Right, yeah. And, but they'd never been back. And mum was going, I think it might have just been a scam, right? But guess what?

Craig reckons, no, no, no, it's not a scam. They monitor it from using satellite images. So the way they sort of keep that accountable is they just look on Google Maps and go, yeah. Oh, there's trees there. It's still there. That's good. People are rewilding farmland, and it's a good thing. Anyway, that's got nothing to do with what we're talking about.

Okay, well, so Charles is going away. If you're in the UK, he's definitely going to give you a free ticket to Wankanomics. In fact, you'll pay you. He'll pay you to attend Wankanomics. Oh, by the B. Yeah, no, he won't. Okay, so I've got some listener reviews. Are we up to the listener reviews?

Yeah, we're now up to the listener review. Let's take a little break. Okay, the first one is just from Tuesday, from further place away. it just says six stars, triub. I mean, I like the stars. I feel like maybe that that was made in error. Trium. Administrative error.

Trium. What does that mean? Mayor of P.P. Island in June says, ho, ho, ho, ho, five stars. Mini V or acts, if you want answers to this and other thought-provoking questions about the mysteries of life, you come to the wrong place. The Chapo report. Yep, Chapo report.

It's a luxury three-star holiday paradise in beautiful Guantanamo Bay. where you can truly escape from the monotony and drudgery of the world and reconnect with your inner chill and the best part you won't have to interact with a single human being is the chaper resort. It's really enjoying this. Committed to the chaper report. He's fully owned and operated by AI's Dombot and Charles DIPT.

Happy chaping. Okay, so that was, I think, an attempted humour. False advertising. Oh, this one's closer to the bone. All of the nicknames are taken says this. You people should be ashamed of yourselves from masquerading as a serious news podcast, came on expecting to hear some well-informed incisive current affairs and answers

in reality. Oh, no. Instead, I find myself cringing at a couple of middle-aged washed-up comedians with egos to size of the Great Pacific Garbage Patch laughing at their own idiotic jokes

and stupid theories. I'm disgusted, five stars. Five stars. That's great. We love these. Yeah, that's lovely. Bad news, great, makes for great satire, says Bastion.

Feeling existential dread as the government collapses, wealth, inequality requires an 80-hour work week to pay rent and numpy politicians suck up the dictators. The chase report is your morning reminder that bad news makes good comedy. Oh, that's lovely. That is nice. Yeah. So in some ways, we have a vested interest in the world continuing to go to sheep.

That's true. I think we're doing it. So, Charles, you should book a flight you don't need to a minimum carbon. And that's, I think, why, because I don't know whether you've noticed on, but I feel like a lot of our podcasts are getting, but we're seeing the virtues of authoritarianism. We've really gone down that path to a point where some listeners may be wondering whether we're being sarcastic. Whether we believe in democracy or not. But I feel like part of it is, because wasn't it Warren Buffett who said, you know, never, like it's very hard to, for somebody to, like your interests tend to, like your beliefs tend to align with your interests.

Yeah. Like, you know, you sort of, oh, I believe in democracy, but that's because you're a slub who doesn't get any out. I'd say, I think in the same way where we have a vested interest in seeing the world got a shit. So we've suddenly become... Oh, that's good. Yeah, because it helps the podcast.

Yeah. Sanity, says Mark Cannon. Dom and Charles, the voice is in my head. I know I can't trust big grins. Yes. Oh, this is back when you're asking for feedback. A lot of people actually wrote some really sweet reviews. Oh.

This isn't helpful. Says Test BX. I love the show how it is no notes. Oh, no. And Sue in Melbourne says... It's terrible. This is very useless. Sue in Melbourne says the rest is Chase. the Chaser podcast, been listening daily for years.

I don't really care what you talk about. I just genuinely enjoy listening to your voices. I mean, Charles, that is the one expectation we can meet. Well, this is one of those, like, this is, this episode in particular, I feel meets that criteria because this episode really is not really about anything. But it does include our voices. This is the person that I'm, I'm, we were basically doing this episode to please SLOX 81, who says, Uninformed Banta 5 stars.

That latest episode titled The Rest is Uninformed Banta was definitely uninformed, hardly banter. It sounded more like an internal content workshopping session, terrible five stars. And this is, I think this is my favorite. I feel like they're not incentivising us to improve. No, they're not. This is from dirt music. Is that Tim Winton, possibly? The rest is rubbish.

Easily the best of the washed up Chaser Relics. Yes, I agree with that. Remarkably listenable, especially compared to Chaz's unsolicited four-hour. our ego-inflating rants about U.S. politics, which are unlistnable except as sleep aids. There's another one here, Jay Mendelsohn, who actually wants us to try a bit harder. Four stars. Oh, no. And says, does he interview Ed Hussich and Zoe Daniel, and maybe someone who was present for the filming of rats in the ranks.

I like all those ideas. That is a very good idea. They do require work. So we will have to change the format of podcasts. No, look, we should. But when we get all the extra money, when we bump up the prices. That's right. For the extra money, we'll buy a producer who's any good.

Yeah, we might get Loughlin to, no, or someone with contact to book. Loughlin has a great job pointing it out. We love Loughlin. But he doesn't have ministers and disgruntled former ministers on Speeddoll. No, but the whole point is even Joe Rogan books his own guests, do. Does he? Yes. That's the one thing you can't outsource.

Yes, it is. No, it's not. But Joe Rogan, all of Joe Rogan's guests are celebrities, because he wants to chat to them and he go, oh, you know, hello, the rock. Hello, George Clooney come on the show. I don't think there's at the same level of virtue in having Ed Husek's phone number. But you can't, no, no, but you can't outsource that. Because unlike, like, if you ring up and go, hi, I'm from fuckwit podcast and you're the producer of it,

nobody listens to you. You can do it if you're from ABC, broadcast. Oh, people say no. I see people will say no to producer Lockland and they might not say no to Charles from Wankonomics. From, you know, esteemed podcaster

and broadcaster, Dom and Charles. All right. Well, that's okay. When you're back, you can get the PM on. Go for it.

All right. So, anyway, Charles is off as of today. And the thing that I was thinking, Charles, it'd be lovely, let's just say something happens to us.

The other thing is, I don't want to hear from other people. I think it's about, Loughlin or us or anything. I don't want to talk to other people. I enjoy talking to you, Don. No, that's the fourth. That's the podcast.

We used to have lots of guests on. We did. And frankly, it's nicer to catch up. That is. That's a different podcast. My goodness. I met this man in 1989. I'm so sorry.

And that is, I think, the first genuinely lovely thing he's ever said to me. That is, I'll take that. That's a good night I went to leave our podcast for now. Enjoy your trip over to the. UK. Yes. Enjoy the free tickets I've demanded you give to listeners. And no, look, I'm sure it'll be a huge success.

I saw the Wankanomics show earlier in the year and it was actually really good. And all I have to say about that is James Luffel, you've done a wonderful job. Fuck you, don't. No, it was really good. I take back the nice thing I said. Well, no, Charles, to be fair, you are the one who is going, this show should have an actual narrative arc. Yeah, that's true. And all of your, the literary theory you always go on about.

It actually, fuck me if it didn't work. Now, Dom, I've got to go now because I've got to get back to the audio book I'm listening to. Wankonomics, a deep dive into workplace bullshit. That's why you're going on this. That's why you're flying to the UK so you can listen to yourself over and over again five times on the flight. All right, have a good flight. We'll catch you. Or does I suppose on Zoom or something?

Yeah, yeah. All right. We're part of the Econoclass Network. See you in a month, Charles. Ta-ta.