The Chaser Report - Hurricane Hyperbole

Episode Date: October 9, 2024

First of all, we'd love to thank Beyonce for helping make this episodes, Charles will explain why. Meanwhile Dom explains the confusion around the new name of Senator Payman's political party. Plus Charles has a gripe with the way American hurricanes are yapped on about in the media. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

The Chaser Report is recorded on Gatigal Land. Striving for mediocrity in a world of excellence, this is The Chaser Report. Hello and welcome to The Chaser Report with Dom and Charles. Charles is very low energy, very low key. If Donald Trump was here, he would say, low energy. We're not talking about Donald Trump today, though. We're not going to talk about the US election. She's tempting.

Let's talk about something more uplifting. Oh, God, what's it going to be Charles? Well, I want to talk about, I know you want to talk about what happened in Parliament today, which I admit, I've gone off it, because I started reading about it. And it actually, it's, well, let's just briefly touch on it on the, the idea that Senator Fatima Payman, formerly the Labour Party, has come up with a party name. So you know that when a sitting senator or, you know, sitting politician, member of parliament leaves a major party, they can just pick whatever party name they want, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah. The party that she chose, you could have anything in, basically, in the English language. She called it Australia's voice.

Yes. That's what she came up with. Is it that she looked at, you know, the statistics around mentions of the word voice in the media in the last 24 months and gone? Oh. This is the great thing. There are several hypotheses for this and they are all bad. So one of them is, yeah, that she just thought, why don't I choose something that is demonstrably unpopular in votes? Mind you, I must say, One Nation was originally a Paul Keating economic paper.

That's true. So you can rebrand these things. He launched in 1994. Rejected by voters. And it was hijacked marketing. Yeah, rejected by voters, but picked up by Paul N. Hanson and run hard. So, like, isn't it, like, imagine if Kodak didn't exist anymore. Oh.

You could just start a company called Kodak. So we should run this podcast, Kodak with Charles and Dom. Well, no, we should say Joe Rogan stop broadcasting. Oh. We could just rename ourselves Joe Rogan. You know what that means we can. As of a couple of weeks, time we call ourselves the John Lodge show. Oh, we should.

Because Lorses is one. She went with Australia's voice because she thought, oh, that's electrical gold. Was it, two-thirds, no, two-fifths of the country will definitely support me. No, but the other... In terms of the people that she's trying to appeal to, isn't she trying to appeal to... Wokesters? But this is the second point. By the way, let's have ads.

Is this the second hypothesis? Is it she's taken a really cherished demand? of First Nations, right? Yeah. That came out of the whole Uluru process. There was the consultation, dialogue. Statement from the heart came out. And one of the points in that was the voice.

And it was a First Nations voice to Parliament, right? Yeah. And so she's just gone, no, I'm going to be the one with the voice. I are non-Indigenous person will be the voice to Parliament. Sorry, guys, you had your chance. And so, isn't that sort of a giant fuck you to First Nations a little bit? Well, but you had your chance to be the voice. I'm now the voice.

Isn't it a tradition in Australia to colonise things that Indigenous people want? Yes, it is a tradition. Yeah, I think that that's leaning it. It's very Aussie. I think it's going after that, you know, like beer commercial, you know, come on, Aussie, come on, demographic by going, I'm going to take something from Aboriginal people. Yeah, it's like selling fake boomerangs in your tourist dollar to make in China. That's what it is.

It's the dot painting. The dot painting. That should be her postage. And particularly when she is like a woman of colour, you would think she would automatically, like she's obviously a more diverse voice, right? She's sort of a Muslim background. Let's be quite clear.

She basically didn't want to have a completely Zionist approach to the Labour Party platform, right? Like wasn't the whole thing she was chucked out of was basically, she wasn't even necessarily going, you can't have a Zionist platform. It's just like, I don't want to sign on to your platform. Yeah, yeah.

Which is, you know, as a Muslim woman, you know, that's a right. I mean, some would say that the Labour Party should be a broad enough church to incorporate those sorts of points of view. But those people have been kicked out of the caucus immediately. We don't know what them, they're rats. Maybe the point is that, you know, voices Australia should be a broad enough church to be able to colonise. Well, it'll be interesting, though, if at the next election. I think it's a bit hypocritical of us to accuse somebody else of colonising. Yeah, that's true.

That's true. Aboriginal Australia. It's something I say with great depredation, but if I was one of the co-authors of Uluru, if the statement is in the heart, I'd be a bit shitty. I'm just saying, it's not for me to speak for them. No. That's kind of the point of this whole thing. I don't want to say, I'd like to know what they thought.

If only there was some institution where they could actually give them. Had a voice. Yeah. Well, not a voice. Not Australia's voice. That's a different voice. That's a political party now. Yeah, yeah.

All right, all right. So we're not doing by that. Let's not talk about that. No, we're not doing that. I really want to talk about hurricane hyperbole, which is what I'm calling it. We're part of the iconoclast network. Thank you for the Tosa report. So you're turning down those faintly relevant topics to get stuck into people who warn us about hurricanes.

Okay. Yeah, climate-induced hurricanes. Right. Yeah. But so this is Hurricane Milton. Like, and I, look, I briefly lived in the US for a couple of years. And the ability of the American media to make everyone pay attention to their weather is quite extraordinary. Like, I was there in about, I think it was like 206, right?

And there was a cold. There's still lots of copies of Charles's book, American hoax available. Is it in chaiseashore shop.com? Oh, probably. No, actually, I think we sold that. But there was a cold snap in New York that year. Yeah. And it was called, I think it was called something like snow occoblips.

Oh, it was. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And it was called an Arctic, Arctic. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. It was called an Arctic, like, great work on the research for this. It was like an art, it was such great marketing. They really marketed it well. It was like an Arctic.

It's so memorable that you can't remember. But the whole one is, every time... Arctic blast, yes. And there was another one last year, by the way. Yeah, and it was so dramatic, and the whole world covered this thing. And, like, yeah, it was very cold for a few days. But, you know, you just go, okay, and I get it. Like, it's terrible that there's a hurricane off the back of another hurricane.

It's definitely something to do with climate change. It's genuinely terrible, as we speak. Like, it's bad. barreling towards Tampa. Yes. And look, I'm sure, like, I'm sort of being a little bit of a sort of, you know, on the wrong side of history here in that, I'm sure it will be also have tragic consequences, right?

Yeah. But in between, can we just be clear that in between recording this podcast and you hearing it, it's going to make landfall, the evacuation has been of multiple million people. My sister-in-law narrowly got it away from it, by the way. So it was generally worrying about 12 hours ago. And Charles, this thing is so massive that the multiple news stories that I just checked are now saying we really need to introduce a category six for hurricanes to get people appropriately scared of this one.

So, and by the way, that article in the independent newspaper in the UK reporting on this hurricane. Yeah, which is my point. Actually leads back to your point. Which is my point, which is it's also just the weather. Like, there is also a lot of other things that are going on that are not necessarily weather related that are also incredibly tragic and probably more able to be like interrogated for their human dimensions than the fucking weather like like it's all terrible and it's very dramatic and everything like that but and you say you're ruling it out of line because

weather isn't fundamentally boring even when it's coming evacuating millions of people and potentially smashing countless home it's still weather and therefore dull conversation i'm just saying it's sort of like it's just american narcissism 101 it's Well, there is a point in this, which is that it is interesting to note that, you know, the world's media is going absolutely nuts about this thing, because they're just reporting what's in the American media. Whereas I'm sure there are storms in less, like, I'm sure there are storms in less developed parts of the world now that no one is commenting on. Yes, and when the really big story that we should all be talking about,

instead of the hurricane. It's whether Beyonce has been knocking off her competitors who win Grammys. What? Well, like with a hurricane. Are we saying Beyonce has created the hurricane? No, you know this. Do you not know this, really?

I don't know this story. This is one of these. You and Andrew are constantly getting stuff off TikTok. That's what this is. Dom, no, the big news. Can we have another ad break? We can. I don't think we've got enough hands.

All right. The Chaser Report. News you can't trust. Lay it on me. So, you know how Pied is in jail and. Never going to get out. Right. So the big conspiracy theory going around TikTok at the moment is that Beyonce always knew.

She knows. She knows. You know the Jay Cole song? You've got to note that... She knows. She knows. Charles. She knows.

I mean, if you're talking about anyone being all powerful and amazing, Beyonce does sort of fit the bill. Yes, exactly. Can I just, on the ditty point, can I just very briefly, I learned thank you to my wife a couple of days ago. that 50 cent personally funded a documentary investigating Diddy called Diddy Do It? Which has been sold to Netflix. Apparently if you piss off 50 Cent, that's it forever. Like he's the best person at grudges in the world. Anyway, yeah, so Beyonce, where's the evidence for this?

Who's been bumped off? Well, I mean, you've listened to the latest M&M song, haven't you? Yeah. Yeah, which is all about P-D-D-D-R-A-P-E-R. Really? S-A's Wait He didn't just spell the word rapper

And leave out a P-Diddy Yep IP rest in peace P-Diddy Diddy, P Like Oh right No, I haven't heard that one

Oh yeah No So everyone's been singing about it But part of the problem Is that Beyonce P-D-D-D-D-D do seem to have been

very close Over, you know Many decades Did go to the parties I think Beyonce Went to some of them as well Yeah And Beyonce was there

The night Two-Pack was murdered You know There's You know Allegations that the person who was holding the gun was actually P. Diddy and Beyonce is part of the cover-up. But the really stunning thing, and I'm sure it's just based on really good editing.

But it does, if you browse TikTok or the P-D-D-D-D-E-D-end of TikTok. The shallow end. For long enough. You come to a very clear conclusion that Beyonce, this is the theory. But Beyonce, if you don't thank her in your Grammy's speech, she murders you, right? How is it that we've gone from, like, Pete Edie's a monster who ruin people's lives to, but it's actually a Beyonce's fault. How do we find a way to blame it on a woman?

What's going on? Just listen, okay. Yeah, okay. So what has been going on is people have been cutting up on TikTok, everyone's thank you speeches. And everyone thanks Beyonce. And everyone, everyone thanks Beyonce. and like they'll get an award and the first thing they'll do is they'll come up and go well I just want to um first of all thank Beyonce right and it's because um what Ieisha

do you remember Ieisha back in like um what was it 90 was it 99 or something like that and she was coming up through the charts and she was she and Beyonce were about the same we're not talking about Alia are you Alia Alia that's her name yeah Iish is a song so maybe it was earlier than that maybe it was like midnight Or whatever. They were coming up through the charts at the same time. They were basically... Alia was a big deal.

Alia was a big deal. She won the Grammy that year. She didn't think Beyonce. A few months later, dead. Playing Clare. You're saying Beyonce is responsible for the crash in 2001 that killed 22-year-old singer Alia? Yeah, there you go.

And she was like, without her there, Beyonce had a clear run of becoming Beyonce. And then, no, and hold on. Don, because I feel like you're trying to shut me down. A little bit. Yeah, a little bit. I'm not crashing your pain, but I think a little less. Yeah.

But, and look, I'm risking my life telling you. It's exposing. Ponce, I'm totally on board. This is all Charles. 2009, let's skip forward a few years. So Taylor Swift gets up, wins her first Grammy, right? What happens? She's clearly not going to thank Beyonce, rather, because almost they're like, well, I mean, she's not even the same world.

It's like, it doesn't even occur to her. So hang on, is this why Kanye West got up with the MTV Music Awards to say Beyonce's video is one of the best of all times? Yes. Because he was worried about Taylor Swift getting killed. Yes, exactly. He saved Taylor. He wasn't treading on Taylor.

It was actually to save Taylor's life and thank God he did. Because otherwise we would never have had the ears to it. It just looked like a misogynistic brain fart. You're saying it was actually an active chivalry. Oh, it was brilliant. It looked like shaman. Macchiavellian genus. Wow, okay.

He's that cannibus. And then, I mean, Lizzo as well. Yeah. Lizzo one. She was, I mean, the best one is Harry Stiles. When Harry, so there was some big award. Everyone was up for it. Very embarrassing for Beyonce because they go, and the winner is,

and the person who has to announce the award decides not to announce the award, right, which leads to this incredible pause in the proceedings. Oh, because they were worried about getting killed. Because they didn't want to announce that it wasn't Beyonce. I think this is album of the year at the Grammy. This is album of the year, the Grammys. Beyonce stands up, assuming that it's going to be her, because it's always Beyonce.

And also, she's the murderer who gets rid of it. It doesn't get awarded the thing. And then this poor woman who has just had the envelope thrust into her hand announces it's Harry Stiles. Harry's house, I believe, yeah. And then Harry Stiles is absolutely petrified. and decides, like, and gets up, first thing he says, thanks Beyonce.

Goodness. Right? Like, literally, I think, I think we're talking Dexter level. Okay, just counterpoint. Counterpoint. It's like, if you don't mind. You don't mind. Okay, so two points.

And then there's another one who broke her, was it Lisa who broke, Adele broke her award saying, actually it should be Beyonce who gets his word. Adele said that. Because she was terrified. She was terrified. Okay, can I give a little more context to this? Because there is an alternate theory.

It's probably not on TikTok, but it is something that's been discussed for years. So two things to know about Beyonce and the Grammys specifically. You're going to say that she helps people out or something. No, no, I'm not. I'm not. So, point one, Beyonce has won more Grammys than anyone else in history. I think it's 31, 32, something like that. She'll probably break the all-time record now, right?

Yeah. So if she's killing people who get in her way, either, no, she's not, because she doesn't need to because she's already won more than anyone else. Or she's very good at it. I don't know which it is. No, and clearly she's very good at it. But, Charles, the thing that you're referring to that it's been taken out of context in TikTok is that what happens is, Beyonce has never won the top award for album of the year, right?

Right. So she didn't want, so when Adele won. She's the Leo won. Yes, that's right. So when Adele won, she, like, that was the year that Beyonce released Lemonade, one of the greatest albums of all time, the one that was all about. Oh, you're just saying that because you don't want to be. But it was clearly better than Adele's 25.

Oh, you're just saying that. So when Adele got up there. What a coward. No, but... Adele literally said, I feel bad because Bonte's album was literally better than mine. And everyone who'd listened to both albums went, yeah. Yeah, that's just true.

And so the whole point is, it's like a little bit racist that Beyonce never wins the Grammy for Best album, despite, like, she's been lost now four times, I think. Because she, that is, will not give it to her. So, Charles, either this year, we will see it with Cowboy Carter, he's just, is finally being done or your theory will get even more fuel and there'll be

another trail of bodies I don't know which it will be I'm actually going to watch the Grammys now I think it sounds it'll be fascinating to see Do you think this is actually

all just deep marketing for the Grammys? I think this is deep marketing for talking about Albo instead of this She knows

she knows This has been a very wide raging conversation I think possibly in the interest of everybody's sanity we should stop

No we should just go to another edge shit Beyonce is right behind you we're part of the iconic class network see you next time